So Upset :'(

Discussion in 'Waiting To Try' started by bigbloomerz, Apr 11, 2009.

  1. bigbloomerz

    bigbloomerz Well-Known Member

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    Our TTC date just seems to be getting further and further away, it was supposed to be October this year after we had moved house, and now it doesnt look like we are going to be able to afford to move till later on in the year which means we might not be in a new house by October.

    Thursday I had one of my best friends over with her little girl, she is also 8 weeks pregnant with no.2, I love my friend to bits and her little girl is my OH's goddaughter, so I treat her as if she was mine too. But I got so worked up on thursday evening, I got so upset that I didnt have a little girl to be a Mummy to, or even a baby on the way, I cried myself to sleep.

    Woke up on Friday still a wreck and Hubby decided i needed some :sex: lol
    ...He didnt use any protection, and he did it on purpose and I let him.
    I came off the pill a month and a half ago, so that I could start getting my body back to normal, cycles and so on.

    After we had done "it" I started crying again, realising that as much as I wanted to have a baby right now that it wouldnt be fair as we live in an upstairs flat with very steep stairs and just enough room for us and our junk never mind a baby and all that goes with it!

    So Friday morning after 2 hours of deciding yay or nay, wether to just leave it and see if anything happens or to go buy the Morning after pill, we went and bought one. I got back home to take it, physically heaving because I SO DIDNT want to swallow that thing!!

    So yesterday and today ive been a bit of a wreck, I have a feeling that I would have got preggers if I hadnt of taken it, due to my days working out and other things.

    Im gutted, I shouldnt have taken it!! I wanted to stick my fingers down my throat and spew it back up again.

    Just needed to rant and let everyone know, coz if i post weird comments its coz im on a downer lol.
     
  2. Amygdala

    Amygdala Well-Known Member

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    Aw, that sounds awful. Big :hug:

    I know it can be difficult to be "sensible" about something as emotional as this. But you took that pill for a reason, that being that you didn't want to bring a baby into a life that wasn't quite ready for it yet. Of course you could have saved yourself the grief by using protection in the first place (and I have to say your OH should have really been a bit more sensible in the situation because you were clearly emotional and not "thinking straight"). But the point is it's done now. You haven't gained or lost anything, you're just a little wiser now. I know a year can feel like an eternity to wait but you know that you're waiting for a reason and you also know that it won't be forever.

    I hope you feel better soon! :hugs:
     
  3. Cinnamon

    Cinnamon Well-Known Member

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    It's complicated to wait but it's good you know why you're doing it: to give your future baby a proper household. I know it feels like S**T right now but you did do the best considering your situation and I advise you to have a chat to OH so you can explain your feeling and reasons to wait and therefor not be weak before time. I'm sorry you had to go through this as I know how hard it is to put TTC date back and admit it's the best. Cheer up love and treat yourself to some chocolate, it works for me!!
     
  4. bigbloomerz

    bigbloomerz Well-Known Member

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    Ate a whole bag of Doritos Crisps instead, lol.
    I'm allergic to Milk so can only have plain chocolate, not the same as a bar of yummy milk chocolate! x
     
  5. Cinnamon

    Cinnamon Well-Known Member

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    I used to be allergic to milk so now I have all the dairy products I couldn't have as a child. Except for milk which I don't like without chocolate... But I guess dorito chips can do just as well. xxxxxxxxxx
     
  6. calm

    calm Administrator
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    I am so sorry, to want a baby so much and to have to take that decision. But remember it is very probable you wouldn't have got pregnant. Big kisses to you, you will feel better and your time will come. Keep yourself well ready for you, and for when you can TTC, :hug::hug::hug:
     
  7. BritAcrossSea

    BritAcrossSea Yellow Bump Turned Pink

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    Keep you chin up, you say that you "might" not be in a new house by October, well that's still 6 months away and a lot can happen between now and then. Obviously I don't know your financial state but "might" sounds as if there is still some hope.:hugs:
     
  8. Pinkgirl

    Pinkgirl Well-Known Member

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    I am sending you big :hug:
    I know you want it so much and when the time comes you are going to be a fantastic mum.
    Think of the reasons you are waiting and how you LO will benefit from it!
    :hugs:
     
  9. bigbloomerz

    bigbloomerz Well-Known Member

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    Thanks Ladies :)

    We had a chat last night and decided we are going to TTC in September :) Wether we have moved or not, we have a 2 bedroom flat and a very big attic! So we may even be able to move things around and stay here for a bit longer.

    It means that I will have had 7 months since coming off the pill, and also gives me chance to start taking some folic acid and getting healthier.

    Hopefully we will have moved tho, woud be great if we did! Its just about prioritising, and not splurging on silly things that we dont need, like dvds and books!

    My OH is 35 and im nearly 24, so we are in a bit more of a hurry due to his age, and also because of his parents getting older, then dont have any grandchildren yet, and I'd love to make that happen for them :)
     
  10. Cinnamon

    Cinnamon Well-Known Member

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    That sounds great love, I'm glad the two of you got talking and actually found a solution... A two bed place is perfect, specially with a big attic. You'll find yourself giving lots of things away without even thinking about it so LO can fit in. Well done!!!
     

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