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Some random thoughts WTT #3

kit10grl

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I was thinking yesterday if we had #3 with the same age gap as 1-2 I would already have a 1 month old baby number 3.

I'm feeling really sad. We only ever agreed on 2 but after the second DH admitted he wouldn't mind a third. But DD has additional needs. At 14 months is still pretty much a baby herself. I worry I wouldn't cope as I am findind the extended baby period frustrating. Not sure I would cope with another baby stage.

I don't know how DS would cope with another person to share the parents with. How would I find enough time for him with a newborn and a special needs child to compete with?

And any new baby has a mildly increased chance of having the same genetic anomaly as DD has. They have said they could test on an amnio for the specific gene but by that point I would already be having another baby as far as im concerned. The condition is a spectrum disorder so there would be no way to judge how affected a new baby would be, they may show little symptoms or they may be so severly affected they wouldn't survive. How would I cope with two special needs children?

Sorry if this is in the wrong place but no where on the forum seemed really appropriate to be honest.
 
I love how everyone is so welcoming on this board. thanks for the support ladies x
 
Not having any special needs children myself I'm not sure what I have to say will be of any worth, simply because I've never had the experience. But I'm sure that in your place I'd have similar concerns, it's surely not an easy situation to think about. It will be challenging but I'm sure that at the same time raising two special needs children would also have tremendous rewards.
 
I have 2 as well right now, though none are special needs, so I'm afraid I can only help so much, but I personally had planned for both of mine to be out of diapers first before we start TTC #3, and for both, or at least one to be in school full time. For the sake of keeping my sanity and making things easier on myself, because I know I would never be able to cope with 3 close in age.

Do you have any plans when it comes to your oldest child going to school? Perhaps if you waited until he was school full time or part time first that give you the break you needed during the day when juggling 3. It's always difficult to predict what the future will bring, or how you may feel months or years from now, but the best thing you can do when figuring out a situation is to just give yourself and your 2 LO's time. Children go through so many changes in such a short amount of time, I know I want a 3rd, but as to when to TTC I have no idea, it's difficult because I like to plan ahead, but for now I plan to just play it by ear and see where things stand months or years from now. Hope you are able to figure something out soon.
 
I only have 1 at the moment and no special needs, and so can't help from a point of experience...but if it's the genetics and the possibility of another baby with extra needs, then could adoption be a good option for you?
 

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