I feel really rude just popping back up. So, sorry gals! I've been hiding behind my wall and not wanting to come out from behind it. My best friend had her baby yesterday.( I spent most of last night downstairs on my own crying) It has been so hard to cope with the past few weeks as she got closer to her due date. If I had not lost my little bean I would have been exactly 8 weeks behind her. (by my lmp) I have been really horrible to all my family as I have been keeping all of this bottled up. Then to top it off I brought some pre seed and used it this month when I had a positive OV and no matter how much you tell yourself before you use it it may not work why do we convince ourselves it might though. I am due my AF on sat and have been having some lower tummy tightnings and a bit of nausea but I get this anyway when I am due AF. I feel like I am cracking up here. I brought a cheap test today from the pound shop(it was a bfn) as I don't want to be wasting a load of money on clearblues just to get a bfn. Sorry to moan I just needed to vent. I went to see the baby this morning and she is beautiful and I feel annoyed at myself that I'm so sad about it all.