Still so amazed

[Cookie1979]

That I'm actually having a baby! I always thought I would never have one, I even remember when I was young I thought I'd have to adopt, strange for someone pre puberty to think like that but thats what I thought. I remember think I'd adopt one day. Anyway then I had years of not really having periods, then eventually was diagnosed with PCOS, and with the rare periods and cysts covering my ovaries I pretty much resigned myself to the fact that I wouldn't ever have a baby.

Then I met my now husband, and I remember telling him quite early on that I probably wont be able to have children, I felt like if he had this information quite early on he could always make a sharp exit if children was what he really wanted. I dont know why I was so sure I wouldn't have kids, perhaps I thought if I told myself that I never would then I couldn't be disappointed.

I lost weight, my periods became almost regular but still nothing happened, not that we were trying but then we weren't being careful in the slightest either. I had a scan and they said I had alot of cysts so I thought while the weightloss had helped my periods the cysts were still there and were still stopping me from getting pregnant.

Then bam I'm pregnant, and now my tummy is growing and I feel him kicking around and moving and every now and then I think wow I'm actually having a baby. I dont think its fully sunk in yet and I dont think it will until I hold him in my arms. Just doesn't feel real sometimes.

Anyone else just not feel like its real? And completely amazed by it?

 

[Kirst264]

See, miracles do happen!!

 

[blondee]

Hello,

Yes, i feel the same way too. We had a loss last year (MMC in March) so i think the idea of actually having a successful pregnancy is still a little alien to me. Every now and then it hits me and i say to DH 'Wow, we are actually gonna be parents!' but then something reminds me of our loss i sit there sobbing thinking about how i will not be able to cope if i lose my little fella. Luckily, the positive moments outweigh my negative thoughts by about 100 to 1!

I just sooo want to hold in my arms and here him breathe and cry and to give him a big cuddle and a kiss!

We are all very lucky.

X