This is what my OH said to me last night. My instinct with Micah has always been to encourage independence. I have worked in early years and special needs, and I have always found that children with relatively little control over their lives blossom when given the chance to take some responsibility for their own needs, and are proud of themselves when they can contribute. I take ideas from Montessori books and blogs as well as following my initiative, but we don't follow any particular parenting style. However, I mentioned to OH yesterday that I'd like to set up a Montessori style self care area for Micah, with a mirror and a hairbrush and hanky, I'm helping him to take off his own socks and her starting to help with taking other clothes off. And OH commented that I'm making him grow up too fast. Micah will be one on Sunday, he will put things that he's dropped in the bin after meals if I make a game out of it, I ask him to wipe his face after meals but I'll still finish off, he helps me feed the cat, I encourage him to "tidy" his toys back to where they come from (although this is very much a work in progress!) I didn't think there could possibly be a negative to all this! Micah enjoys 'helping' most of the time. But is OH right? I don't want to be a 'pushy parent' and I want him to enjoy being a baby, being a toddler. Now I'm worrying that I've put too much on him. I admit we sometimes spend a long time on simple things as I'll wait for Micah to bring me his shoes for example, not all the time as we're often in a rush, but if we have time then I'll encourage him to fetch things himself and he understands a lot of instructions! Am I a mean mummy? Please be honest!