Terrified of birth after episiotomy with no pain relief

[littlepeanut1]

As the title says I'm pregnant with no2 and my anxiety about the birth is slowly building.

With my son I went into labour early and made it to 10cm without my waters bursting. Up until this point labour was very much bareable. However once the midwife burst my waters all hell broke loose.

My waters were burst at 8.30pm and my son was born at 9.10pm however for that 40 minutes I honestly thought I was dying. I was given gas an air but my son was stuck so they hit the emergency button and gave me an episiotomy without pain relief and tried to place the kiwi cup on his head. Then realised they hadn't cut enough and cut again luckily the cup went on this time and they quite literally dragged him out.

Everything after this is a bit of a blur however the stitching up process took a very long time with pain relief injections being delivered locally 😭.

This has left me terrified for this second baby, I need to also add my son only weighed 5lb 10.

Has anyone had any positive experiences the second time round?

Thanks

 

[ClairAye]

Oh my you poor thing! I had an episiotomy with my first too but thankfully had a local first. He was delivered via foreceps in a huge rush as I had an infection and was very poorly. I was pretty terrified with my second, expected it all to go wrong but she was pushed out with no assistance in 8 minutes.

 

[MrsButterfly]

You poor thing. My two birth experiences were very different. First lasted 24 hours, pushing for 2 hours, had episiotomy and almost ventouse suction but got him out just in time. Second - labour lasted about 3.5 hours and I was pushing for 5-10 minutes. No pain relief and no tearing.

So there is every chance your second one will go smoothly.

 

[tinkerbelle93]

I can't believe they'd give an episiotomy without pain relief that's just utterly barbaric! ☹️

 

[xxxemmaxxx]

Just wantes to say hugs.. i have also been given a cut and forceps delivery whilst I could feel it and I'm currently fighting delivery options for number 3. Birth one was also assisted which is what makes me think this one will be too.. but generally most people go on to have a normal second delivery. My second was over 10lb so might not of helped matters.

 

[Feronia]

Most of the time subsequent babies are much easier! My first was 56 hours, occiput posterior brow, followed by a significant postpartum hemorrhage. My second was 2.5 hours from start to finish, easy, no complications! This is usually the pattern I see for subsequent babies.

And episiotomies are only ever cut without anaesthetic first in the event of an emergency where there is no time. I'm so sorry that happened to you, it must have been awful.

 

[littlepeanut1]

Most of the time subsequent babies are much easier! My first was 56 hours, occiput posterior brow, followed by a significant postpartum hemorrhage. My second was 2.5 hours from start to finish, easy, no complications! This is usually the pattern I see for subsequent babies.

And episiotomies are only ever cut without anaesthetic first in the event of an emergency where there is no time. I'm so sorry that happened to you, it must have been awful.

Yep there was just no time his heart rate had dropped considerably and I was having a mare. They were kind enough to give me a local for the stitches though fingers crossed there is no need for a cut this time. But I think my lesson has been learned - if my waters don't break on their own I won't be waiting until 10cm this time before having them broke for me and I plan on trying out all the pain relief they have to offer lol

Thank you for all the replies!

 

[Feronia]

There's no harm in waiting for your membranes to rupture spontaneously. You didn't do anything wrong, sometimes baby goes into distress. It isn't likely to repeat. And there is USUALLY enough time to give a local anaesthetic! I've seen a good number of episiotomies in my day (and have performed ONE myself) and there has, so far, always been enough time to give a local anaesthetic.

 

[smileyfaces]

I had an episiotomy with number 1. I have had 2 more babies since then and never needed another. I had a second degree tear with number 2 and just a graze with number 3. That one horrible experience wont dictate how your next labour and birth will be so try not to fret over it x

 

[topazicatzbet]

I can also support what the others have said, I had an episiotomy and forceps for my first. I was really worried about the second but he came out no problems and he was a good deal bigger too.

 

[second.time]

I had an episiotomy with my first, they gave it to me without asking, and it ended with a third-degree tear. I healed really well and was terrified of the second birth. I will say I ended up with a second episiotomy because the scar tissue from the first wasn't stretching, but it was very minor and I had a second-degree tear that also healed quickly and easily. Most people who have tears the first time don't have them the second time, I think I'm a little unusual. But even so i ended up healing well and easily with no lasting complications. Best of luck to you! Second births really do tend to be easier.

 

[Teri7489]

With my first I had similar, everything fine until pushing then it all went wrong. I was given one local injection but they didn't have time to wait to just cut me and put the forceps in and dragged her out. (result = 4th degree tear)

I opted for a secton section time round (which ended up an urgent elective) as my waters broke 10 days early. But I was assured that I would have extra care if I went for a vaginal delivery. After an anal ultrasound to check I was told I could go for a normal delivery if I wanted as I had healed well and as long as I was in hospital earlier than the recommended time for monitoring then it would be OK, the same was unlikely to happen again.

I only opted for a section due to the psychological impact of the first delivery and the other problems I had after (totally unrelated but all interlinked -too long to write here)

 

[Skye82]

You poor thing. My two birth experiences were very different. First lasted 24 hours, pushing for 2 hours, had episiotomy and almost ventouse suction but got him out just in time. Second - labour lasted about 3.5 hours and I was pushing for 5-10 minutes. No pain relief and no tearing.

So there is every chance your second one will go smoothly.

Really similar to me. I had a dreadful experience with my first labou R where in the end I suffered a tear in my cervix which they had to stitch up as well as the episiotomy, all with no pain relief. I was terrified when I had my second but as pp says: the second labor was sooooo different. Really fast, a couple of pushes and no episiotomy. I did tear but only slightly and they only had to do one stitch which I barely noticed.

 

[mara16jade]

I'm not quite sure why episiotomies are so common in other parts of the world. It's very, very rare to have them here. My first was 7lbs 2oz, and my second was 8lbs 2oz. I tore a tiny bit, but never felt them and didn't feel anything after during recovery. I did have an epidural with both babies though...so I was pretty relaxed while pushing.

Second babies are usually much easier and you tend to tear less, if at all. I'd go in with an open mind and if you need pain relief, take it. There's no harm in it.

 

[Dawnlouise30]

My two births were so different.

First one was 6 days late, induction, gas and air and pethadene, 8 hour labour (all on back as needed constant monitoring) and born in theatre via forceps with large episiotomy to boot...... Was not pleasant and my recovery was hell on earth. I couldn't sit down properly for three months. Mind you he was 10lb 7 ounces.

Second birth (3.5 years later). Started labour spontaneously one week early. Got to hospital at 6 am and was 7cm ready. Gas and air only and laboured leaning over back of bed so gravity on my side. and he was born at 7.30am 8 minutes after my waters broke. I had a second degree tear which was stitched but my recovery after was great. I didn't feel like I had just given birth. He was 8lb 3.5 ounces.

Hope this helps