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Terrified of MMC--end of first trimester driving me crazy

rainbowsun

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I'm nine weeks pregnant and battling a virus, but other than feeling achy, all my pregnancy symptoms are gone. My bloat is gone, I'm loosing weight, and I'm terrified that something happened the baby. We've heard the heartbeat last at 8 weeks, but not going in for another few weeks is driving me insane. How do you guys survive the end of the first trimester, where there's no bump or movement or physical proof that you're pregnant?
 
One day at a time, and with the belief that no news is good news. MMCs are t very common and each day means a lower chance of anything happening. You can't just not worry, but you get through.
 
i found first tri so hard... i feel for you.

I had a mmc before i got pregnant with my baby now. As pp said, take it a day at a time. you have already seen a healthy baby with heartbeat so everything will be ok!

i booked a private scan at 10 weeks for peace of mind and then after that i had the 12 week scan. But i had a symptomless first tri so i was always worried something was wrong.

wishing you all the best!
 
All of my first (and some of the second) trimesters have been spent staying busy, keeping my mind off of the pregnancy until I feel confident in the pregnancy. I once didn't feel confident until I was 20 weeks along but had another baby (the babies were born 11m apart) to keep me busy at the time. That was a tough one, though.

With my first born, I was able to keep busy by doing a lot of online window shopping for the things I'll want for my baby someday. You're 9 1/2 weeks along now. There's a 98% chance everything will be fine. Go ahead and plan. Look at names. Add a bunch of names to a list for later on. Research the best crib mattresses for baby. Look into a cosleeper or bassinet or figure out if you may want to cosleep with baby in your bed. Research vaccines and pediatricians and medications and all kinds of things. I don't wanna sound overwhelming, but the best way to pass the time is to keep busy, and knowing how you may want to handle certain situations as a parent is very important and something you can consider right now! I'm positive that everything will be fine. Your baby will be perfect. Just keep yourself sane in the meantime! :)

And if that's not your style, maybe binge watching a TV series or two will help. Ever watch Friends???
 
Im feeling the same way rainbow. I've got a private scan tomorrow morning that I hope will ease my worries, but I'm terrified of going tomorrow and getting bad news. I can't really help with distraction techniques as I've been a mess these past 6 weeks. I hope that you can find something to ease your worry, the fact that you've already seen a hb is really good news, the risk of anything bad happening now is tiny.
 
With DD I was nauseous and tired the whole pregnancy. This time I've been getting more of an appetite now that I'm nearing 11 weeks and I'm afraid something happened to baby. I still can't find them on the dipper but remind myself that that may not happen until 12 weeks. I'm currently sick with the flu and struggling to keep my fever down so I'm scared for baby. It's all one day at a time :hugs:
 
A friend just had a late miscarriage, so statistics aren't comforting because as rare as it is, it does happen. But thanks for the advice everyone! I don't want anyone to stress but it helps to know I'm not the only one...
 
I just wanted to share, I have been on these boards for years. In my personal experience, I have seen countless threads, all in 9 weeks, that say "my symptoms disappeared!". I have come to the conclusion the placenta probably starts helping to regulate your hormones around 9 weeks. This is not to say it is scary, just to say you are not the only one feeling this way. Maybe no one else is at this moment, but I have seen it lots before so I know where you are coming from.

Also being sick can dehydrate you a little, making bloat go down and uriantion less frequent. Lots of ladies say their bloat goes down 9-10 weeks and then the real bump comes.

I hope you feel better soon. The chances of miscarriage go down so much with a confirmed heartbeat.
 
I'm scared too. I've even considered doing weekly HPTs to make sure kiddo is still there. My sister had an MMC that wasn't detected til like 19 days after the baby had passed. She said (upon thinking back) that she'd noticed her boobs weren't as swollen over the last couple weeks.

Just tell yourself what I tell myself: "This is not in my control and whatever will be, will be." And then just hope for the best.
 
I had a miscarriage at 14 weeks.l and no signs anything was wrong at all until it happened. And even when they did the testing theu found nothing. They say its "just one of those things"
You think you're safe after 12 weeks but really the whole 9 mnths is a risk as it can happen at any time for no reason.
I am pooping myself all the time now Im currently 8 weeks.
I just keep telling myself, if its going to happen, it will happen.
So im just hoping for the best and trying to carry on as normal as possible.
 
Too true Helen. I've gone through two losses myself, and I have yet to have a healthy full term pregnancy. Oddly I think I was more nervous about miscarriage with my first (ended in a missed miscarriage at 8+1) than I am this time around. The worry is there esp anytime my symptoms ease, but I know from experience now that it won't change a thing. I take from my own experience and other stories of later losses that we have to just enjoy what time we have no matter where we're at because statistics be damned it can still happen to any one of us. Going through an MMC is crushing and devastating. It brought me to a really dark place for a long while and I'm still not completely through to the other side, but I know I'll find my way back to a better place in my own time. It's awful and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone, but it really is nothing to fear. You deal with it best you can if and when it happens. Until then you're so very lucky to be pregnant, and the best thing you can do is just enjoy every moment you get no matter how sick you are or aren't. The worries will always be there, but you can choose to focus on the joy instead (some days that will be easier than others). Congrats and I hope you feel better soon xxx.
 
Thank you for your kind words. They are so right as well.
Good luck with everything too xx
 

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