Terrified

Discussion in 'Pregnancy After A Loss' started by Mummy of Ange, Jun 5, 2011.

  1. Mummy of Ange

    Mummy of Ange Well-Known Member

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    Well ladies, got my BFP on Tuesday after loosing my gorgeous twins on Christmas Day at 23 weeks.

    The BFP came as a hugh shock, as i havent had a period since 12th March.

    Midwife thinks im about 4+4, because last week just before i got the BFP i had slight bleeding which prompted me to do the test, doctor thinks it was implantation.

    I want to get excited, but im completely terrified its going to happen again. People keep telling me to forget about it and just get on with my life, but its easier said than done, i just know i wont enjoy this pregnancy.

    Im trying to think positive all the time but its soooo hard xxx
     
  2. open lotus

    open lotus Well-Known Member

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    firstly huge congratulations.
    I lost my twins last pregnancy,I know exsacly how you are feeling.
    sometimes my heart beats so fast and I get panicky.I have been doing pregnancy meditation,that is helping me alott.

    I am so sorry you lost your babies,:hugs:

    do you journal?I would suggest you journalling your feelings and thoughts every morning,it really helps alott,I can give you a couple of links for free online meditation if you would be interested too.

    however if you just need a friend,I am right here.

    :hugs:
     
  3. Alimum

    Alimum Active Member

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    This is my second pregancy after losing a bub at 20 weeks.
    Instead of being happy at the next 2 positive preganacy tests I cried, thinking of all the things I had to face. I wanted to wrap myself in cotton wool.
    But I didn't, I went to work, tried to enjoy my last surfs and walks on the beach.
    Tried to pretend that it was all going to be ok. Just kept living, moving.
    I'd have lots of moments - late at night, early in the morning, sitting on the toilet! any quiet time i had remembering his whole birth and death, and it overwhemed me... and then just move on.
    So, I guess I'm saying, don't deny yourself the grief and fear because it's real and exists.
    Just don't dwell on it because your pregnant! With a baby!
    It was easier to happy, if I'd let myself feel the pain.
    That pregnancy went well despite 2 long dreary months in hospital after being rushed up for an energency stitch.
    But good side of that is the doctors knew what to look for this time!
    And I now have a divine, funny, crazy 16 month old runing around repeating everything I say, giving me THE sloppiest kisses.
    I'm on bedrest again at 27 week and I've only just gotten over the fear..... I feel like we might just make it. And that is just SO exciting.....
    Good luck and I hope this helps even just a little..
     

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