Things you wish you'd been told or prepared for before labour

[Beanonorder]

I had a pretty bad labour the first time round and some of it was just because I wasn't prepared for it or been told about it. I thought it might be nice for those of us who have done it before to share for those who are about to do it for the first time!
Please note I don't want to scare any FTM, just make them aware so they are ready!

Ok so for me no-one warned exactly what it would be like when they checked for dilation. It honestly felt like I had been raped! After the fourth or fifth time (really long labour!) I finally had someone who was able to check without causing pain. Being checked is really uncomfortable and if you tense up it makes it worse.

Manual placental removal! Yes, your doctor/midwife can fit his or her WHOLE hand up there! Mine did it twice. One upside from that is he or she can 'clean' you up a bit inside and for me this resulted in very little bleeding and I had no clots or anything.

Breastfeeding helps bring down the size of your uterus but taking five minutes a few times a day to massage the area really makes it happen faster. I got moaned at for not doing it the first couple of days. I don't know if this is just a Chinese doctor thing or normal.

Anyone got anything else to share?

 

[RaspberryK]

I don't think your experience is the usual one at all, I never experienced any of those things, sounds awful.
xx

 

[Wannabe Mommy]

Wow Beanonorder it sounds like you had a bad time of it.

I had 2 cervical checks and it didn't hurt at all including when they broke my waters.

I would say move around as much as you can and try different positions. I hated being on my back, stood up leaning on the bed and pacing worked best for me.

Wear nighties not pjs, I had several big gushes of water over about 2 hours and ruined my jammies.

 

[Cattia]

I also didn't find cervical checks painful. I agree that if you can move around it helps a lot. The thing I wasn't prepared for was the after pains, particularly when BF for the first 24 hours. I wouldn't say they were agony or anything but like strong period pains. Apparently these get worse with every pregnancy. Funny thing was I had NO pain relief during labour when my DS was born but I took paracetamol for the after pains! apparently it's your uterus shrinking back down to size, which mine apparently did really quickly so maybe that's why I had them quite bad.

Also during my second labour I was amazed how much pain relief I got from getting in the water. It really really helped with my contractions. If I get the chance, I would definitely like to do that again.

 

[RaspberryK]

Cattia I was the same, no pain relief in labour and asking for drugs for the after pains

Second the water, it was so lovely the midwife made me get out because she thought it stopped my contractions all together and getting out the contractions felt terrible.

xx

 

[Beanonorder]

I don't think your experience is the usual one at all, I never experienced any of those things, sounds awful.
xx

Oh no it definitely wasn't the usual! I was reading another thread after I posted this one where someone said they were given a spinal block in order to do a manual placenta removal. My doctor just stuck her hand in there!

I also forgot they pricked me with the needle on the inside when going to break my water!

 

[RaspberryK]

Your delivery must have been complicated and had retained placenta?
My midwife didn't hurt when checking my cervix, my waters went naturally, I delivered the placenta by gently pushing, and I didn't have my stomach nassaged or get told to do it at all.

The only thing I would say to anyone is they may try and bully you into things that make it easier for them and during labour I didn't question anything but I will be giving dh strict instructions on what I don't want this time so he can do it for me.

Xz

 

[Cattia]

My MW wanted me to deliver the placenta naturally but after a while it didn't come out so she gave me an injection to get it to come out. I have to say I hadn't really read up on this beforehand so I just went along with what she suggested, I'm not sure what standard practice is on delivering the placenta. She did tell me they are only allowed to leave it a certain time before giving the injection as I remember.

 

[mum140381]

I had a pretty bad labour the first time round and some of it was just because I wasn't prepared for it or been told about it. I thought it might be nice for those of us who have done it before to share for those who are about to do it for the first time!
Please note I don't want to scare any FTM, just make them aware so they are ready!

Ok so for me no-one warned exactly what it would be like when they checked for dilation. It honestly felt like I had been raped! After the fourth or fifth time (really long labour!) I finally had someone who was able to check without causing pain. Being checked is really uncomfortable and if you tense up it makes it worse.

Manual placental removal! Yes, your doctor/midwife can fit his or her WHOLE hand up there! Mine did it twice. One upside from that is he or she can 'clean' you up a bit inside and for me this resulted in very little bleeding and I had no clots or anything.

Breastfeeding helps bring down the size of your uterus but taking five minutes a few times a day to massage the area really makes it happen faster. I got moaned at for not doing it the first couple of days. I don't know if this is just a Chinese doctor thing or normal.

Anyone got anything else to share?

i think this is quite normal i have had 6 and this has happened to me in a few not all of them but few and i have had a lot worse as well.

the drip when induced they could not get it in my arm.

oh and waiting around for hours and hours in hospital noone tells u u can be sat there waiting for 8 hours and then an emergency comes up so you have to wait till the next day take some books lol

and all the mess of waters blood ect i didnt think there would be that much.

but i am on number 7 so cant be that bad

 

[Perplexed]

Wow I'm so surprised that being checked for dilation during labor was painful...I actually did not feel it. I know it hurt when they broke my waters but honestly the contractions took away from everything else. I felt nothing but contractions!

 

[mummy2_1]

Every women has a different experience during.labour, we can't judge what did or did not happen but comment about.our own. Also my cervix check was pain less, I had a sweep at 7days over and that was a little uncomfortable as baby's head so far down, felt alot of pressure
I wish someone had told me about the catheter to go to the toilet this was a shock
Take plenty of food and drinks UK hospitals only accommodate the mother. Poor fathers are left to fend for them selves. I will be taking my own cushions this time too. And agree with pp walking around will speed delivery up.
I had the injection.to deliver placenta and found it stung as obviously had just given birth but was over quickly.

 

[AMAS86]

I have had 3 kids, baking my 4th, and all cervical checks have been so painful. I feel like they are digging for my throat. Pap smears are even painful for me. My OB warned me that checks during labor can feel worse. Well she's right. Holy moly.

 

[Cattia]

Take plenty of food and drinks UK hospitals only accommodate the mother. Poor fathers are left to fend for them selves. .

Yes to this! Never mind about my DH, I found myself STARVING in the middle of the night! I took pringles and loads of chocolate and I ate the whole lot! I also took Lucozade which I sipped during my second labour (wasn't allowed in my first as I had an epidural) and I found it hugely helpful to give me a little bit of energy.

 

[Betheney]

I wish I'd prepared for pain. My mother (who birthed 7 kids) said labour isn't that bad. All those natural birthing websites told me pain during labour comes from the fear and expectation that labour will be painful. Well i had not a worry or ounce of fear in the world when i went into labour, in fact the midwives thought i was a little nuts because i was bouncing off the walls in excitement.

Well fast forward 18 hours and i was hysterical. Labour fucking hurts! It was so mind blowingly painful. I was completely beside myself and begged them to put me under a general, cut the baby out and wake me when baby was there.

In hindsight not preparing for pain was a huge oversight. I was so lost in labour. The contractions were wearing me down mentally and i was having the most negative and fearful and hysterical thoughts run through my head.

With my second labour i prepared for pain. Despite disliking hypno birthing when i read the books i quite liked their pain coping and breathing techniques. I knew that if the contractions got on top of me mentally i would be a hysterical mess again. So i worked so hard to stay in control, focused and on top of the pain. So naturally i did so well i was on the maternity ward (not a birthing suite) with everyone under the impression (including me) i wasn't in labour yet and the doctor came in to check me and announced i was 9cm and my son was born mere minutes later. Lol

The second time i adequately prepared for pain. I'd you're not willing to take pain meds (like i wasn't) then you need another form of coping with it

 

[SarahBear]

It's better for babies to NOT be bathed after they're born. No harm came from not being told this because my midwife wasn't one to default to bathing babies. When I questioned when to wash the baby off, she explained that I could wash her off if I wanted to, but that the vernix is good for the baby's skin and for bonding (bonding hormones are in the vernix). As mentioned, nothing negative came from not being told, but it would have been nice to know that ahead of time.

 

[londonangel]

I didn't get the pain when they checked my cervix but I'm totally with you on the manual removal - I had to go through that ordeal too but they couldn't get the placenta out and I still ended up going to theatre. Having the baby was a doddle compared to the horror of 'whole hand/arm inserted into uterus' thing!

 

[londonangel]

I don't think your experience is the usual one at all, I never experienced any of those things, sounds awful.
xx

Oh no it definitely wasn't the usual! I was reading another thread after I posted this one where someone said they were given a spinal block in order to do a manual placenta removal. My doctor just stuck her hand in there!

I also forgot they pricked me with the needle on the inside when going to break my water!

I had a spinal block to remove my placenta. The doctor tried twice to get out the placenta by sticking her hand/arm up there (owwwww!) but the placenta had started to disintegrate and she was just pulling it out in pieces as it wouldn't detach. Ended up with a spinal block and trip to theatre. If it happens again I'll only let them have one go at removing the wretched thing before taking me to theatre (when they'll still stick their arm up there but at least I'll be drugged up!).

 

[SarahBear]

Why are these doctors reaching inside all of you to remove the placenta? My midwife tugged on the cord a tad at one point (which annoyed me), but otherwise, she just waited for it to come out. Seems like pulling it out is just asking for issues!!!

 

[RaspberryK]

It sounds barbaric doesn't it? !
I was unfortunately given the Injection without consent which was pointless because the second I pushed and the midwife applied a small amount of traction it was out - before the injection would have worked.
Xx

 

[SarahBear]

I should remember to ask my midwives this time around how they handle that part of labor.