Those who successfully did PUPD! (Or anybody else.)Please please help.

[~NEL~]

WARNING- This may get long and I may start rambling, and ask a lot of questions!
Well I have always rocked LO to sleep, and he always wakes up 5+ times a night and have to rock him again. Anyway I have nlot been feeling too good for past few days and last night LO wen to sleep at 8, woke up at 9 then 9.30 then at 11pm, no matter how much I rocked hkim he wouldn't sleep and was being grumpy.
Gave him calpol as he is teething, changed his nappy, fed him nothing worked. His dad even said that I can go sleep and he will take over, woohoo (theres a first time for everything, lol)
Hour passes and still no success, we could tell he was tired as he kept rubbing his eyes.
Anyway at 1am we decided to get in bed and put him in his cot which is still next to our bed and thought he would tire himself; nope
Then the crying and screaming started and I vowed never to let him CIO/CC
(Not slamming those that do but its just not for me)
Anyway his dad said give it a try, it lasted the whole of 1min before I picked him up. At this point DH got angry with me and turned around and said he is going to sleep.
I then decided it was time to try PUPD, I layed him in his cot and each time he cried I picked him up and settled him and back down he went. 25mins later he was fast asleep. He then woke up every 2 hours(ish) and all I had to do was pat him to sleep bas opposed to rocking him. Do you think this was because he was tired or because he knew he self settled before and knew he could do it again?
So did I do it right and can somebody please explain the step-by-step how to successfully do PUPD.
Please don't banish this post to page 101, I really need help.
Thank you! (May add forgotton details when I remember, a VERY sleep deprived mummy here)x

 

[SAmummy]

Hi I know you want successful stories, but we tried it and it worked well when Jed was younger (like 5months) but as he got older it was disastrous. He would settle when I patted him, but cry as soon as I walked out the room. This could go on for hours so we would end up with him in the bed. The thing is he was so restless even in our bed. He teeths really badly so I always felt a bit sorry for him. Anyway the other night I was so exhausted from going up and down we let him cry it out which is something I thought we would never do. It went on from 1 to 3 am. He didn't cry continuously, but on and off ..... mostly shouting and not hysterical (except for at first.) We shut the door and just as I was about to give in my hubby said I can bring him to the bed, but not ours ! I'm so glad he helped me stick it out because from the next night Jed has slept through. The thing is when we used PUPD Jed would get even more hysterical because we kept going in instead of just letting him find a way to self settle. I know CIO is not for everybody, but it worked for us and Jed is none the worse for it. I hope you find a solution that's good for you soon .

 

[~NEL~]

I would have been rocking him all night if it wasn't for hubby.
Thanks for your reply, anybody else?x

 

[PepsiChic]

i used PUPD with a litle bit of crying at 4 months old, it took 2 weeks to get naps and bedtime 100% sorted,

heres what i did and recommend:

you'll need:
an early bedtime! - PUPD can take a while, and the later it gets the more tired and resistant LO will be. Id say start at 7-8pm. so say 7pm - bath/read book, 7:30pm - milk feed if he has one, 8pm bedtime. if your LO seems tired at 7pm, then you need to move it back to say 6pm bath, 6:30pm feed and 7pm bed. dont try and keep a tired baby awake!
diaper (change right before bed)
milk feed
muslin cloth/teddy/blanket square (i use one like this: https://www.amazon.com/Carters-Child-Lovey-Security-Blanket/dp/B002G3Z3BK/ref=sr_1_28?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1296055084&sr=1-28)
lullaby projector


bedtime: change LO diaper, sit next to his bassinet in the dark with just his music lullaby projector on (i highly recommend one of these!) and give him his milk (warm)

milk finished, burp sitting up (so he is awake), then put over shoulder and pat and shh till sleepy but not asleep.

put down in bassinet, give muslin cloth/teddy to hold/chew/suck, tuck blanket in, turn projector on again (so it lasts a while) and leave room.

wait 5 minutes, even if fussing/crying, go back pick up put over shoulder and ppat back, shhing, when lo has stopped fussing put back down, give muslin/teddy put projector on again and leave.

repeat untill asleep.

DONT turn lights on
DONT talk to or around your LO
DONT play energetic games the 30 minutes before bed time, read a book/give bath instead so its relaxing.

the reason i leave 5 minute gaps is because i realised going straight back in he wouldnt settle for hours. most of the time it was a tired cry, after a week he was self settling with no crying or fussing for bedtime, by the end of week two, he was self ssettling for his naps as well.

2 months down the road, still going great!

hope this helps! i REALLY recomend a bedtime teddy ro muslin cloth or something that he ONLY gets when going into his crib. that way he associates it with sleep time, same with the dark room, book reading/bath and the projector.

and by making sure you stick to doing thigns the same evry night he gets into a routine quickly and easily.

 

[louandivy]

Sorry I havent used PUPD, but for the past week I have fed Ivy and then me and OH have taken turns sitting next to LO shhhhing her and rubbing her belly until she fell asleep, first night it took 3 hours. Past few nights its taken about 5 minutes! I know some might consider this CIO but we were with her constantly reassuring her so she wasn't alone, and it seems to be working! Good luck with whatever you decide to do though!

 

[PepsiChic]

Sorry I havent used PUPD, but for the past week I have fed Ivy and then me and OH have taken turns sitting next to LO shhhhing her and rubbing her belly until she fell asleep, first night it took 3 hours. Past few nights its taken about 5 minutes! I know some might consider this CIO but we were with her constantly reassuring her so she wasn't alone, and it seems to be working! Good luck with whatever you decide to do though!

i think thats CC, CIO is when you leave them alone.

 

[girlsmooch]

we used pupd for naps and it worked really well we only had crying for the first couple of naps so very quickly went to shh/pat. he only cries when going down now if i've left him too long and he's overtired

 

[Khloeee]

PepsiChick, can I ask whether you did this for bedtime and naps at the same time or started just with bedtime then moved onto naps?

 

[~NEL~]

Our bedtime routine is currently
7.30 bath
7.45 massage and story
7.55 bottle
and usually asleep 25mins later
Should i keep the lights off when feeding him?x

 

[Lellow]

I always feed LO in the dark just before bed time, he nearly ALWAYS falls asleep within minutes as he finds the sucking so soothing and just conks out. However when i did this with the light on, he'd get distracted by the light fitting or the mirror or SOMETHING and his big brown eyes would remain wide awake!

 

[Mrs RC]

We did PUPD with 10 mins cry down when Lucas was 4 months old as it was starting to take up to 1.5 hrs to rock him to sleep! We decided on a 7pm bedtime so our routine went as follows:

6pm upstairs, nappy off time and run bath
615pm bath, massage, clean nappy and in sleepsuit
630pm milk feed
650pm story
7pm in bed.

With PUPD the key is to put baby down as soon as they stop crying ie dont hold them till they stop crying then keep holding them till drowsy again.

We put baby to bed at 7pm then left the room. When he cried I went in, picked him up and when he stopped crying put him down. I then did PUPD for 20 minutes then put him down and left the room for 10 mins. This is the crying down period.

We started this on a Wednesday and for the first couple of nights it took about 30 mins to get him to sleep. Then day 3 was horrible and he screamed for about an hour - we still did PUPD though as we had read that there might be a regression on day 3! He also had a blip on day 5 whereby his naps went funny and he refused to sleep in the day.

It took a week but now is brilliant. We have out bedtime routine (bath, feed, story, bed) and he goes in his cot - after a big cuddle - at 7pm. He then takes himself of to sleep in about 10 mins. He fusses a little but doesn't cry. He has also just started doing the same for naps - providing I pick up on his tired cues he can go to sleep in 5 - 10 mins. It is so much easier than carrying him round for an hour!

I used this book: https://www.babysleepanswers.co.uk/ and also made use of the forums on the website. https://www.babysleepanswers.co.uk/Fo...opic=5279#last

The books do say that it can take 2 weeks for a new routine to work and you do have to persevere and be consistent. The first few days and exhausting but I an glad I carried on.

HTH

xx

 

[~NEL~]

We did PUPD with 10 mins cry down when Lucas was 4 months old as it was starting to take up to 1.5 hrs to rock him to sleep! We decided on a 7pm bedtime so our routine went as follows:

6pm upstairs, nappy off time and run bath
615pm bath, massage, clean nappy and in sleepsuit
630pm milk feed
650pm story
7pm in bed.

With PUPD the key is to put baby down as soon as they stop crying ie dont hold them till they stop crying then keep holding them till drowsy again.

We put baby to bed at 7pm then left the room. When he cried I went in, picked him up and when he stopped crying put him down. I then did PUPD for 20 minutes then put him down and left the room for 10 mins. This is the crying down period.

We started this on a Wednesday and for the first couple of nights it took about 30 mins to get him to sleep. Then day 3 was horrible and he screamed for about an hour - we still did PUPD though as we had read that there might be a regression on day 3! He also had a blip on day 5 whereby his naps went funny and he refused to sleep in the day.

It took a week but now is brilliant. We have out bedtime routine (bath, feed, story, bed) and he goes in his cot - after a big cuddle - at 7pm. He then takes himself of to sleep in about 10 mins. He fusses a little but doesn't cry. He has also just started doing the same for naps - providing I pick up on his tired cues he can go to sleep in 5 - 10 mins. It is so much easier than carrying him round for an hour!

I used this book: https://www.babysleepanswers.co.uk/ and also made use of the forums on the website. https://www.babysleepanswers.co.uk/Fo...opic=5279#last

The books do say that it can take 2 weeks for a new routine to work and you do have to persevere and be consistent. The first few days and exhausting but I an glad I carried on.

HTH

xx

I want the May siggy! LOL
My LO hardly slept during the day as I refused to rock him, hope I have the strength to carry it through x

 

[cantthink]

I massage, read and nurse to sleep. It works for now. My theory is the more mature he gets the more able he will be to soothe himself. He is a 5 month old baby and needs me.
He will develop those skills. I don;t believe that rocking will become a 'habit'. I say if it works for you and your family for now do it.
Try every so often if yor baby will sleep without rocking but if not then rock away. Babies feel very comforted by rocking, a mothers job is to comfort xxxxxx

 

[cantthink]

sorry you are saying it doesn't work... have you tried cosleeping?

 

[Mrs RC]

[/QUOTE]

I want the May siggy! LOL
My LO hardly slept during the day as I refused to rock him, hope I have the strength to carry it through x[/QUOTE]

it depends what your day time routine is but when I did PUPD Lucas had 3 naps a day with the lunchtime nap being the longest.

I would rock him to sleep for morning nap and he would sleep for about 45 mins.

For lunchtime nap I would do PUPD till he went to sleep but no longer than 1 hour. If he hadn't gone to sleep in 1 hour I would get him up and try again when he looked tired.

For the afternoon nap I would take him out in the pram and walk as I was so tired!!

HTH
xx

 

[PepsiChic]

PepsiChick, can I ask whether you did this for bedtime and naps at the same time or started just with bedtime then moved onto naps?

yes, bedtime first, that took about 7 days for him to completely self settle no crying or anything. then i started doing the same thing with naps. he now naps twice a day for 1-2 hours at a time. but having a routine for naps works best. my LOs routine goes something like this:

7am - wakes
7:30am - bottle
7:45am breakfast (solids)
10:30am bottle
11am nap
1pm wake
1:30pm lunch (solids)
2:30pm bottle
3pm nap
5pm wake
5:30pm dinner (solids)
6:15pm bath
6:30pm bottle
7pm bed

there is 4 hours between each bottle, except the first and thats because generally if they sleep good during the night they will wake up hungry because their tummies will be empty, but then they get tired quite soon! if your babys wakes at 8am and goes to bed at 8pm just move everything i said an hour forward. and even if he wakes a bit earlier from say his first and second nap i still try and give his bottles 4 hours apart. but if hes showing hes ready for his naps anytime earlier then normal then he gets his bottle and nap. dont try and keep them awake as that will just make LO stressed and resistant.

Our bedtime routine is currently
7.30 bath
7.45 massage and story
7.55 bottle
and usually asleep 25mins later
Should i keep the lights off when feeding him?x

yes keep the lights off when you feed him, and feed him sat next to his bed, so as soon as your done and hes burped you put him down, no walking around the house or from room to room holding him.

My LO hardly slept during the day as I refused to rock him, hope I have the strength to carry it through x

if a baby doesnt sleep enough during the day, night WILL be hell. babys get overtiered very easily, and when they do they get cranky and upset and frustrated so they cry and fuss at bed time meaning they dont get to sleep without a fight.

however i would work on bedtimes first then work on naps. try what i suggested tonight, even if you dont have a projector or something, use a nightlight to see when you feed him next to his bed, dont talk to him just "shh" noises if hes fussing. but give him something to hold, a burp cloth, muslin cloth, teddy, anything! and if your worried about it, once hes aslee take it away. I did that at 4 months old, but at 5 months i just started moving it away form his mouth and leaving it with him so that if he woke he could grab it and self-settle back to sleep.

 

[Mrs RC]

I agree with Pepsichic about the comforter - Lucas has a fleecy bear thing (bit of fleece with a bear head) that stays in his cot. I don't let him bring it out wig him - it is for sleeping only.

Also agree re feeding in dark before bed. I feed Lucas with only the bathroom
Light on so there is some light on the landing and his door is open so I can see what I'm doing.

Also once he is upstairs to bed he doesn't come back down again till morning!

 

[PepsiChic]

I agree with Pepsichic about the comforter - Lucas has a fleecy bear thing (bit of fleece with a bear head) that stays in his cot. I don't let him bring it out wig him - it is for sleeping only.

Also agree re feeding in dark before bed. I feed Lucas with only the bathroom
Light on so there is some light on the landing and his door is open so I can see what I'm doing.

Also once he is upstairs to bed he doesn't come back down again till morning!

my LO comforter is a fleecy blanket with a monkey head on! and great advice, it should be a crib bedtime/naptime/sleep time only thing, NOT a toy and never allowed out the crib!

 

[Khloeee]

There's some very helpful info in this thread, thanks for taking the time to post. LO did not respond well to PU/PD when we tried, just worked him up further. I know do PU/PD when he's just fallen to sleep in my arms as that works better. But I might give it another go once we are out of this sleep regression as he's getting a bit too heavy for me to comfortably rock/hold
him to sleep!

 

[~NEL~]

Another quick Q! Will he not get confused if I am rocking him for naps and not at night?xx