hi guys,
i am sorry in advance for this post I just have to offload my brain in a sypathetic place before I explode.
I WANT A BABY!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHH.
OK feel a bit better now.
We are WWT as my OH can't get a permament job. It breaks my heart every time he has another job interview and other no. He must have applied for 30 + teaching jobs now and had 10 interviews. Every time he gets feedback now they say we really would like to employ you, the kids loved you but... we went for someone with more expereince, the internal candidate ect ect. What breaks my heart tho is his face when he tells me. Not only is he gutted for himself and his self esteem is at rock bottom now. He also says I just want to give you a family. I am trying sooooo hard not to talk about TTC and babies with him and not to add to the pressure.
.
Plus I have PCOS so I have no idea if we can conceive naturally and it could take a long time and I feel time passing by. I know I should be charting and getting ready but with no idea when it may happen and the fear that charting may show its unlikely I'm ovulating and too afraid to start.
I can't talk to my family as my mum just says start trying now as by the time it happens for you and baby is born he'll have a job which i partly agree with but OH is adement he doesn't want to TTC until he knows he can provide and I don't want to add to the pressure he is under. My friends either have babies or aren't even thinking about them.
Its a rubbish time at the moment. OH hates supply teaching and going to different places every day and feeling unwanted. Money is tight but ok and I feel in limbo. I am just having a rubbish sad day. Sorry just had to let that all out so I can pick myself up, put a smile on my face and keep reassuring OH its ok.
If you made it all the way down here Wow thanks for reading. sorry such a ramble
K
i am sorry in advance for this post I just have to offload my brain in a sypathetic place before I explode.
I WANT A BABY!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHH.
OK feel a bit better now.
We are WWT as my OH can't get a permament job. It breaks my heart every time he has another job interview and other no. He must have applied for 30 + teaching jobs now and had 10 interviews. Every time he gets feedback now they say we really would like to employ you, the kids loved you but... we went for someone with more expereince, the internal candidate ect ect. What breaks my heart tho is his face when he tells me. Not only is he gutted for himself and his self esteem is at rock bottom now. He also says I just want to give you a family. I am trying sooooo hard not to talk about TTC and babies with him and not to add to the pressure.
.
Plus I have PCOS so I have no idea if we can conceive naturally and it could take a long time and I feel time passing by. I know I should be charting and getting ready but with no idea when it may happen and the fear that charting may show its unlikely I'm ovulating and too afraid to start.
I can't talk to my family as my mum just says start trying now as by the time it happens for you and baby is born he'll have a job which i partly agree with but OH is adement he doesn't want to TTC until he knows he can provide and I don't want to add to the pressure he is under. My friends either have babies or aren't even thinking about them.
Its a rubbish time at the moment. OH hates supply teaching and going to different places every day and feeling unwanted. Money is tight but ok and I feel in limbo. I am just having a rubbish sad day. Sorry just had to let that all out so I can pick myself up, put a smile on my face and keep reassuring OH its ok.
If you made it all the way down here Wow thanks for reading. sorry such a ramble
K