I'm sorry to read so many stories of bad birth experiences, but in a way it's good to know we're not all alone. My own labour sounds like it was perfect - it was precipitate, only took 2 hours from start to finish(so it says in my notes but I don't really know where they got that from) and my son is perfect and healthy which is the most important thing. My waters broke in the afternoon so we went to hospital. After being monitored I was told nothing would happen that day and I'd probably need to be induced the next afternoon. I was kept in because my blood pressure was 'slightly high'. I was all for going home but in retrospect it's just as well I stayed where I was. My husband was sent home at 9pm, I had been having some pains by then but was told nothing was happening. An hour or so later I was given pethidine, which I hadn't wanted but the midwife said that as I was no where near giving birth it would be ok and the baby wouldn't be affected at all. I said to her that I must be a real wuss to need drugs when I wasn't even really in labour. At about midnight the pain was really bad, I was on an ante natal ward with the curtains pulled round my bed, there wasn't anyone monitoring me or anything. I remember at one point being on all fours on the bed, dripping with sweat and feeling completely out of it. A midwife came to see how I was so I asked if I could have a bath, she was really happy for me to do that. In the bath I had an almighty pain and I remember thinking 'if this isn't labour then I won't be able to cope with it when it gets worse' I stood up to go and tell someone I wasn't coping. As soon as I stood up I felt the urge to push. I got dressed and was on all fours (again!) on the bathroom floor when the midwife knocked to see if I was ok. She came in, I said I felt like I needed a poo (tmi!!) and she said 'I think it may be your baby's head', one quick internal check later and I was told I was fully dilated and rushed to the delivery room. My son was born 2 pushes and about 15 mins later. I know this sounds great - all very quick, not pushing for hours, not in pain for hours etc. But in reality I was alone, my husband had no chance to get back to see his son born (and this baby took 7 years to conceive so we don't envisage having anymore at our ages) and I'd gone through the pain of 2nd stage labour with no support which was really scary. All the books you read, the programmes you watch, all go on about how great it is to have support and how much Dads love being involved etc. It makes me feel really sad to think that my husband missed out on that. He arrived about 30 mins after our son had been born, he didn't know that he had been born so had a bit of a shock when he walked into delivery room to see me sat there with a baby!
I do feel fortunate that it was quick, but I do feel that after all those years of waiting for this baby it's just so sad that we weren't together for his arrival. Oh and it really bugs me when people say I had an easy labour. Quick - yes, easy - no, not really!! My mother in law is insistent that it was easy, I managed to get her to concede that it was 'easyish'. Goodness knows how she knows, she wasn't there and neither was her son!! My midwife was really understanding, she said quick births can make you feel like you're in shock sometimes, which is true.
I do know my experience was no where near as bad as other people's but I suppose a lot of it is about your expectations isn't it?
It has helped to write it down.
With each person I tell it gets easier and makes me feel more confident that I'll do it all again.
