TTC After D&C/D&E Buddies

[nostress]

Hello all, I recently had my first miscarriage and D&C on August 19 . I know for positive sure that we want to try again as soon as my doctor gives me the go ahead, but that could be a wait until OCTOBER !

I'd kind of like to pass the time with some buddies going through the same wait, or already to the trying phase . I know its a bit different TTC after a D&C/D&E as opposed to after a natural miscarriage so I thought it made sense to make our own buddy thread .

Anyone else with me? Anyone thinking of going ahead and trying before getting the go ahead from the doctor?

Baby Dust to all! Praying for some sticky beans!



BUDDIES:

nostress: Alex (22) - DH (29) - DD (2) - DSD (10) - Angel Baby (6.2 weeks) D&C August 19, 2011

Twinkie210: Stacie (28) - DH (31) - Ds (8) - Angel Baby (7 weeks) D&C August 5, 2011

peteradamelle: Anna (31) - DH (33) - DS (18mths) - Angel Baby (8.5 weeks) D&C August 18, 2011

nursekelly: Kelly (28) - DH (36) - DS (3) - MC @5-6wks, 0ct. 2010 - MC @ 12w5d Aug. 2011 w/ D&C

jennijunni: Jenn (32, okay just shy of 33)- DH (35)- DD (15)- DD (14)-DS (9) - DS (6) - DD (3) - DD (19 months) - Angel baby boy (16.4 weeks) D&E June 4, 2011

bastetgrrl: Steph (32) - DH (33) - Angel Baby (7/8 wks) mmc July 6th and d&c August 16th

Kanga86: Claire (25) - DH (25) - Angel Baby (12.4 weeks measuring 5.4 weeks) mmc 30th June, D&C August 26, 2011

jennajul2001: Julie (29) - DH(34) - DD (10) - my angel baby boy (16 weeks 3d) D&C August 15, 2011

Aunie: Aunie (28) DH (27) m/c 6 wks aug 2010, m/c 6 wks jan 2011, mmc+d&e aug 2011

lala73:

JanetPlanet:

 

[nostress]

Well this hasn't quite kicked off, but I hope it does soon, I've got some questions and a week off from work (following my D&C procedure last Friday).

First question:

Why do the doctor's say to wait 1-3 cycles after a D&C to try to conceive again? My doctor didn't do any scraping, just the suction.

Why do I need to wait, when, what she suctioned out (lining-wise), is the same stuff I would have shed while menstruating?

If they say wait till you have a normal period, and 28 days later I have a normal period, doesn't that mean my body would have been fine to carry a pregnancy?

I waited the "required" amount of time after getting off the implant (2 regular cycles), but that didn't do me much good, lost the baby anyways, what makes this any different?

Will my chances really be THAT much worse if we DON'T wait?

After my first live birth my cycles came back right away, to normal, after getting on the implant my cycles did exactly what the implant says they'll do for the first 6 months then leveled out, and after getting off both the implant and seasonique (doc's put me on 2nd birth control to manage ovarian cysts) my cycles went right back to normal and on time.

I am young (22) and healthy... I dunno, I want to discuss this with my OBGYN at my follow up on the 30th.

The thing is, we waited the suggested amount of time for my uterine lining to "build up" after getting off of the impant, however I still lost our baby. Even after having normal periods... how reassuring is it, REALLY, to have a normal period after a D&C?

Just putting my thoughts out there.

Please any and everyone jump on here and voice your own opinions/thoughts. I meant for this thread to be for all D&C/D&E-ers. This is very new and frustrating to me. But would be much easier with buddies.

 

[bastetgrrl]

Hi nostress - I'm so sorry for your loss. I just had a d&c last Tuesday after my mmc on July 6th and they found that there was still some tissue leftover during my 6 wk u/s follow up.

From what I've read each dr has their own opinion on when to begin ttc again. A lot has to do with the emotional part as well as being able to pinpoint the due date. I don't believe your chances are any worse by not waiting. I've read that you are most fertile the first six months after a mc.

Good luck to you.

 

[nostress]

Thanks so much for your input!

Wow, is the 6 week follow-up u/s standard? My OB only scheduled the 2 week follow-up, no u/s and no bloodwork...

 

[bastetgrrl]

Not sure if it is standard. My dr had ordered weekly bloodwork and was watching my levels shortly go down so since they hadn't hit zero yet they scheduled the u/s.

 

[nostress]

Oh, I see. I think I have to call in if I'm still getting positive hpts 3 weeks after or something like that

 

[Twinkie210]

Hi, nostreess. We have talked in other posts. I would love to buddy up. We are waiting one cycle, which was recommended by my Dr (although the NP I saw at my 2 week follow up suggested waiting for 3 cycles, but I think it was because I was upset at my appt). I am 18 days post D&C, still waiting on ovulation, so hopefully AF will return.

I don't know about implants, but my Dr told me to wait one cycle after stopping BC, which we didn't really follow, but it ended up taking us 6 months to get pg anyway. I had some people suggest that left over hormones could have been the cause of my MC, but I don't think that was the case. Mine was probably a blighted ovum, so I am thinking it was just a chromosonal abnormality. Plus I would think that the hormones would have been gone after 6 months.

I wanted to wait one cycle to make sure that I was completely healed physically. Manually dialating your cervix and suctioning the lining does take a toll on your body, I just didn't want to risk it, no matter how small the risk. I think that waiting 3 months sounds kind of strange. I would talk to your doc and find out the reason he/she recommends waiting that long.

How are your feeling today? My spotting is pretty much gone, it sometimes comes back very lightly though. I took another hpt to see if it would come back - and it had a very faint + (it is hard to tell because it is a cheap blue dye test). My BBs are kind of sore today, I am hoping it is a sign of ovulation, but more than likely it is from the left over hormones.

 

[nostress]

Hey Twinkie!!! I'm glad you found this post! Yay, I have a buddy!

I'll talk to my doc in a few weeks and see but I'm pretty sure my hubs and I won't try or prevent in September, then we'll really start trying in October. It all depends on what my OB says on the 30th.

I feel ok today... a bit achey and some nausea, but not terrible. Woke up to slight cramping, but I took my meds and now its just a dull ache. No spotting (red or brown) when I wipe anymore, so thats nice, yesterday it was just brown a couple times when wiping.

Emotionally, I really don't know what I feel today...

I'm a planner so I've already decided I'll be checking hpt's every few days to make sure it's getting out of my system. I'll be doing opk's as soon as I get a negative hpt. I am NOT going to base BDing around any of this, just want to know my body is going back to normal. Like I said before, we are NOT "officially" trying until after my first period, but we aren't going to prevent either (unless what the doc says on the 30th changes our minds).

I can't wait to get back to making love to DH again. It's been over 3 weeks!!!! I miss him, I miss the closeness, and it would feel really nice right now. But we have to wait, till after my doctor's appt. Ugh, oh well.

So what do you have going on today?

 

[nostress]

I saw your post about your SIL's baby shower, I'm glad you handled it ok, and I totally understand the need for a drink to handle families (ugh, don't even get me started). I also get what you are saying about feeling lucky and blessed to be granted an "angel" and knowing that you will cherish every second of the next pregnancy even more.

It's nice that not many people knew about the m/c. That's what I am most worried about, I don't want a bunch of questions about it at work or in social situations. I'm SOOOO glad we didn't tell my family (except my birth mom, and she's awesome) and I am SOOOOOO glad we are moving in about a month and don't have to deal with pitying glances from folks from here that somehow found out...

 

[Twinkie210]

I know how you feel about the making love. I was spotting before my MC, so DH refused to have sex with me until I saw the doc and we knew everything was ok. Unfortunately my next appt was the U/S where we found out about the MC. Then of course I didn't feel like doing anything. Then we had to wait until after my 2 week appt. So we had a good 4 week dry spell!

Like you I am attempting to track ovulation to tell if I am "back to normal" but we are preventing this month. I just couldn't live with myself if I got pregnant right away and something happened. I would feel like it was my fault because I didn't listen to the Dr.

But as soon as AF leaves we are back to BDing!

Emotionally I am doing a lot better. I was able to talk about my MC with one of the ladies I work with, which up until this point always involved a massive amount of tears. I got through SIL's baby shower, and I will get a call at the end of the week from my cousin, who is finding out whether her baby is a boy or girl. Other than that I am looking forward to some baby free time (at least free of other people's babies!)

 

[peteradamelle]

Hi Everyone,

I had a D&C (ERPC is the new name I discovered!) on the 18th of August, at 8.5wks. I had a 7wk scan and the baby's heartbeat was very slow and the embryo was measuring half the size it should have been, so I didn't have a lot of hope when I went back for my scan on the 17th of August. The hb had stopped and embryo hadn't grown.

I phoned my Ob today, he is very well known in London (and working from one of London's best hospitals) to ask if I could resume sex and take my 18mth old son swimming tomorrow. I got the go ahead for both of these things, because I am not bleeding. I had a tiny bit of bleeding straight after the ERPC, nothing that evening and nothing since. It has only been 4 days, but I am ready to get back into things and start trying again. I have no idea when I will ovulate and I was going to do a OPK test tomorrow morning.

I am definitely emotionally ready, and really don't want to wait. The Ob that did my procedure said to wait one cycle in case there is a small amount of tissue left over and also for dating purposes.

My Ob (the one who delivered my first baby and will deliver future babies) said to wait 2 cycles. Again, I asked him why and he said it's purely a dating thing.

So the way I feel is why should I wait if it's just a dating thing?! It will be interesting to see if I get a +ve OPK tomorrow morning - if it's +ve, obviously it will mean the hormones haven't left my body yet.

I might post another post asking girls if they've conceived straight after a D&C/ERPC and if they've been successful.

 

[nostress]

I still have baby fever over here, but that may change. I want to be around other babies and hold them and snuggle with them... My loss hasn't changed that... not yet anyways. So far I've only gotten tearful with the hubs and the doc, so I'm doing alright on the tears department, I'm typically not very emotional anyways.

I dunno, I've been debating back and forth and back and forth with the hubs about the guilt of trying too early and losing the baby, or waiting to try and having it take forever... Or waiting to try and losing the baby anyways.

I keep flipping and flopping back and forth. The hubs isn't firm on anything except: TALK TO THE DOCTOR. So we aren't "truly" decided until we talk to the doctor.

I just know we did everything we were supposed to do this last time, waited the suggested time period and STILL lost the baby.

It's so frustrating and confusing...

Here's a tmi question... can we masturbate right now? As long as it's just clit stimulation? My sex drive went WWWAAAAYYY up after the D&C... so I'm curious

 

[nostress]

Welcome peteradamelle! I'm so sorry for your loss, but glad to hear you are feeling emotionally ready to try again. Nothing will ever replace our angels, but I understand feeling just READY to try again.

I just took a hpt and it was still a pretty strong positive so I'll wait till the weekend to take another one. We'll see how strong it is then. I just ordered a bunch of wondfo ovulations tests, hopefully I'll get to use them soon enough.

Keep us updated on your OPK test tomorrow

 

[Twinkie210]

Anna, I am glad to hear you got the go ahead to resume everything so soon! I had to wait on swimming, taking baths (showers were ok of course!), and sex for 2 weeks after the procedure.
Good luck trying again! I would be careful using the OPKs so soon after the procedure, because they could pick up left over hormones. My hpts are still positive 2.5 weeks after my D&C, so I decided not to even try OPKs, and since we aren't trying this month, it seemed like a waste of $. So I am only charting BBT. Which has been hard since my sleep patterns are all messed up and my temperature seems to be fluctuating more than usual still. FF had me ovulating earlier this week, but then took the crosshairs away

 

[Twinkie210]

nostress- I know exactly how you feel with the sex drive thing, and I will admit that I did a couple times while we were waiting for the all clear

It didn't really cause any problems for me, but it did increase my bleeding for a little while and it made cramping worse (tmi!)

If you aren't cramping or bleeding, I wouldn't think you would have anything to worry about!

 

[nostress]

LOL, thanks soo much Twinkie, see this thread is already proving useful!

I'm thinking today will be a very chill day, depending on what my hubs says when he comes home for lunch I may have to take my daughter to her 24 month well baby appt (it'll be like an affirmation to get a healthy report from her doc today). If he can't get time off work to take her I'll have to, but I'm still having some pretty good cramping off and on so we'll see.

I'll probably make dinner tonight too... That's all I have planned for today though, I really don't want to do much. I just need time to share with you nice ladies and relax with me, myself and I (and maybe my vibrator...)

 

[Twinkie210]

Your plans sound better than mine! I am currently at work, then home to make dinner and do homework with my son (he is 8 and in 2nd grade). Tomorrow evening there is a pregnancy loss support group that meets. I am debating on whether or not to go. One of my friends lost a baby last year and says the group is very nice, but I don't know how I feel talking face to face with other people about this. I am undecided at this point. I kind of want to go, because the group organizes a memorial walk in October, and I think it would be great to take part in this walk to remember my little angel.

 

[nostress]

The memorial walk sounds nice... As I lost this little one on my birthday I'm thinking of just adding an extra candle every year in remberance... Nothing huge, something people may not even notice, but I'll know, and DH will know, and it will mean something to us.

If you think you can handle it, perhaps you should go. I think I'd go if there was a group like that here.

When do you count the baby as lost? From the date the doctor's tell you the baby stopped growing, or from the date of your D&C?

 

[nostress]

Oh boy, now my cramps are back... it always seems to happen on the dot, my pills wear off every 4 hours and goodness me, I can FEEL when it happens

 

[peteradamelle]

Sure, I'll let you know tomorrow if the OPK is +ve or -ve. I'm guessing it'll be +ve as it was only 4 days ago that I had the D&C. I probably should do HPT's instead. They have been ordered from Amazon and are on their way to me! I can't wait to get pregnant again. There's not much else I think about at the moment! It is sad when you miscarry early on, but you have to try and look at it as a baby that wasn't meant to be because it was never going to be a healthy child (if it was down to a chromosome abnormality which most miscarriages are). I've read a lot about chromosme abnoralities, andwith a lot of them, you miscarry at 20-40 weeks, or the baby is stillborn, or dies within the first year of life. So when you think about it like that, it's best to lose it within the first two weeks while it's still an embryo/fetus. Wishing you all the best of luck conceiving.