Ugh why doesnt my OH understand!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by mixedbeautyx, Nov 19, 2011.

  1. mixedbeautyx

    mixedbeautyx Well-Known Member

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    I am only less than 4 weeks pregnant and I am terrified of m/c or another ectopic. Especially because I have been having some pains and light brown spotting.

    I try to talk to OH and let him know how I feel and all he says is I am stressing to much and I need to relax. Umm well how does he expect me to relax when all of this is taking place. :(

    I do try not to think about it and relax but I am just extremely nervous I cant get my mind off it. I have a hard time sleeping at night. It just really is so much for me.
     
  2. meggabear

    meggabear Mommy, daddy and Caiden

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    I remember having those fears, I had an M/C and my OH didn't believe me and told me the same things. some guys are really not all that great at giving comfort, not because they do not want to or know how, they simply are not good at it and don't have much they can really offer at that time. I know how you re on pins and needles and it is very scary, after our M/C my husband was afraid to get pregnant again in fear of losing that one too and being heartbroken, it took a year for him to come around to trying again, so it might be your oh's way of to keep calm himself too. spotting is also normal at this stage dear, just keep an eye on it ok?
     
  3. Platinumvague

    Platinumvague Well-Known Member

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    I think it could be like my fianceeand its not that he doesn't care or isn't worried but he just doesn't show it.Kind of like what meggabear said.It might be a way they keep calm.In my early weeks when I brought it up my fiancee would say something like "will you stop" or "why do you keep bringing it up" or "don't say that". They care and Im sure its on their mind too but hey their guys lol.I don't know to many who show their emotions.Good luck.Truely hope you have a healthy and happy 9 months
     
  4. futurephotos

    futurephotos #2 is baking!

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    Guys don't really get it- I too can't take my mind off what's going on... I'm the one who has to feel every little thing that is new and happening to my body. It makes it really hard to focus on other things- but my DH doesn't really want to talk about it.
     
  5. NAndersonx

    NAndersonx Mummy To Sophie Louise

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    Sometimes i think its a guys way of just trying to reasure you. And in a way it does work if theyre telling you everythings fine and to stop worrying etc, i just think they could sometimes be a bit more understanding about it. Because us woman carry the babys we are more worried about things happening and get more attached than most men. Also i would try not to worry to much about spotting at 4 weeks, easier said than done i know, but i was spotting at 5 - 6 weeks and eventually went to A and E to get a scan where we saw our little ones heartbeat. Unless its bright red blood enough to fill a pad with severe cramping then doctors have told me not to worry. I still get the odd cramp now and again, especially when i sneeze for some reason! I hope everything goes well for you xxx
     
  6. Rigi.kun

    Rigi.kun Mum to Teddy

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    Guys don't cope with things like women do.
     
  7. intravenus

    intravenus Well-Known Member

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    with my last pg, i knew from the begining that something was wrong and my oh just told me i was being paranoid. It turned out I was right ( I'm not saying you're miscarrying here at alllll) But my oh was sooooo hoping that it weould be 2nd time lucky, he couldn't contemplate me being right. It was his way of convincing HIMSELF that things were ok.
    If you're worried, get yourself to drs and get checked.
    Lots of good luck wishes xx
     
  8. Nadialew

    Nadialew Well-Known Member

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    I understand how you are feeling now. A few days after my positive pregnancy test, I was spot bleeding for 2-3 days. My husband was very reassuring. He told me, if this life is not meant to happen, we'll face it together. Dont worry, I will always be with you no matter what.
    So, it wasnt really bad and I felt calm. Just try to make him understand, all you need is for him to standby you and be there for you when you need to talk.
     
  9. caaraa

    caaraa Guest

    Hope you have a healthy and happy 9 months.
    https://www.primeaffiliate.com/track/images/22.gif
     

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