Well, That Was A Downer, Lol!

[dachsundmom]

Good morning ladies-

As many of you on this site know, there was a post earlier about being too old to have kids; usually I take those types of sentiments for what they are, one person's opinion and move on from them, but this time....

One of my biggest TTC emotional struggles has been my age; not that I am too old- like I once said, if you can bleed, you can breed, but maybe I just missed my window of opportunity?

My DH is younger than I am and I often wonder if I am taking his chance for biological children away from him; he tells me that if we never have one of our own, my DD is enough and he's still a very happy man, but I can't help but wonder.

I really am just venting; but I have to be honest, my feeling have not been hurt like that for a very long time. Funny how some things get to us!

 

[Wendyk07]

Good morning ladies-

As many of you on this site know, there was a post earlier about being too old to have kids; usually I take those types of sentiments for what they are, one person's opinion and move on from them, but this time....

One of my biggest TTC emotional struggles has been my age; not that I am too old- like I once said, if you can bleed, you can breed, but maybe I just missed my window of opportunity?

My DH is younger than I am and I often wonder if I am taking his chance for biological children away from him; he tells me that if we never have one of our own, my DD is enough and he's still a very happy man, but I can't help but wonder.

I really am just venting; but I have to be honest, my feeling have not been hurt like that for a very long time. Funny how some things get to us!

I was seething when i read that post. So much so that i couldnt post what i had typed or i would have been banned from the board.

Dont let one stupid, uneducated, insensitive person get to you hun. This is what she wanted, to get a reaction and a rise out of us (i can see no other reason to post what she did here). Its unfair and totally bang out of order.



Wendy
x

 

[Grumblebea]

Well, I'm 39 and I would be considered ancient by that stupid twit! It just usually takes us mature ladies a little longer. Cheer-up

 

[Macwooly]

Oh Dachsundmom

I typed exactly what I wanted to say to vent my feelings then deleted it all and wrote what I did as that person really needs to mature and realise the consequences of her words and actions

It would be easy for me to say don't let it get to you but it already has I must admit it hit a nerve with me too and my poor DH after dealing with all my expletives then had to deal with me in tears I am mad at myself for letting it get to me

I look at my DH and worry that he will never get to be a daddy and he tells me if it doesn't happen then he is happy with me and the dogs but he would make such a fabulous dad that it scares me and makes me sad in equal measures I may never give him that gift

The person who started that other thread was inconsiderate, insensitive and immature in my opinion and I believe one day (call it God's will; karma or whatever you believe in) she will be made to feel the way she has made so many of us feel today!

for all who were affected by that silly post

And ladies loads and loads of PMA and for all us mature ladies who will make fabulous mums to our much loved and much longed for babies

And the best things come to those who wait

 

[NorthStar]

Dachshundsmom don't take to heart what some stupid cow said, God sometimes I think people that stupid shouldn't be allowed to breed.

The mods closed the post as they saw it for what it was, blatant stupid trolling.

Think of it this way, is a baby better off with an educated, smart and experienced mum or some mindless uneducated twit who was born 10 years earlier? No? End of.

 

[Indigo77]

Don't listen to that stupid moron...If anyone shouldn't be breeding, it's her....We don't need more stupidity in this world....

 

[TiggerToo]

That's the one thing I stress about...even though we've just started, I think - WHAT IF...and I can't think about it. Must go Zen for a few now....

 

[readyformore]

You know what? My ob/gyns always tell me how young I am at 34/35.
One of them had a baby at 42 (nearly 43) and the other is ttc at 40. They think I'm a baby, lol.

Yes, there a lot of 'statistics' about being 35 and over while having children. It does take longer to get pregnant as you get older. Sometimes you need a little help to convince your body to do it. Honestly, I had infertility in my 20s so it's not always true that you're fertile when you're younger.

There's nothing I can do about it. I can't roll back time and start younger. I tried to start younger, and it didn't work out the way I had planned.

It is what it is, *shrug*. I can accept that.
I don't care that I'll be AMA if I have another baby, I only care that I have another baby! I'm struggling just like I did in my twenties, so age means nothing to me at this point.

Don't let that lady get you upset. We all have our sensitive spots, she hit yours while she was trying to stir up trouble. Some people are such drama seekers!

 

[AliGirl]

When I went to see my GP after I got my BFP, I asked her whether there was anything that I should/shouldn't be doing because of my age (40). She didn't have any concerns at all and just treated me like any other pregnant person. Unfortunately I went on to m/c but whether that was anything to do with my age, I will never know. Absolutely no-one mentioned my age though when I was in hospital after the m/c. I just think that the media are much more concerned with stirring up stories about older mothers, while the medical professionals don't seem to see it as so much of an issue.

 

[Natsby]

Are you thinking about getting pregnant or being a mom? If you can get pregnant then you aren´t too old. As for being a mum will your age stop you from giving cuddles and love to your LO? Will you be unable to get up in the night and feed, comfort or change? Will you not want to play with them and prefer to sit knitting? Will your age mean when they are 13 and entering the worst years of their lives, (as far as a parent is concerned,) that you won´t have the patience to deal with them or the wisdom to help them? If you think you aren´t capable of these things then it might be that you don´t want to be a mum, but if you are screaming inside yes I can do all that, then honey now is your window of opportunity.
Your dh knows what he wants in his life, if he says it is you then give him respect, believe him. If you don´t get your BFP, (god forbid) then it won´t necessarily be down to age, my friend is 30 and they can´t seem to get a bfp after 4 years trying, sometimes it happens. She was wrong to post on here, but she was just stirring gremlins I think we all have from time to time, but if you are intelligent isn´t it normal to think what if? and can I do this? etc. sending you big hugs honey and take a deep breath, tomorrow there will be other idiots and other friends and other challenges, but your up to face them because you have experience and wisdom on your side, and you will. Baby dust for as long as you want it not as long as some idiot thinks is right. x

 

[velo]

My first instinct was to write a really nasty reply too. But really the post just showed up the OPs own ignorance. Reaffirmed my belief that we should have to be *over 30* before starting to breed, or at least pass some kind of basic maturity test Remember we are much more knowledgeable and better able to parent than the young'uns. Seriously she was more concerned about her friends mom being pg than her 16 year old friend that's baby is almost certainly going to have to be parented primarily by the grandma.

 

[onmymind17]

Honey dont you worry, you will be a mom one day, and no your not too old. All you have to do is look into your heart and realize that your the perfect age to have a little one. Dont let her ruin your confidence, some people just dont think before they say something. We all know that we are going to be moms, its just waiting for the right time!!

 

[dachsundmom]

Well my fellow geriatrics, LOL, I cannot thank each of you enough!

I know letting that thread get to me like that was silly; I go out of my way to try and keep things a little lighter- I really do love to laugh. I think if she had posted on any other board, it wouldn't have bothered me as much; it was the fact that it was posted here!

I tell myself everyday, my eggs are not fried, they might just be softly scrambled, lol. But after reading that last night, I really felt like it was time to start pricing nursing homes for myself.....thank you all again.

 

[TiggerToo]

My friend, who is finally carrying a little bean (she's 36, three MC's, now she's at 14 wks 3 days!!!), said she was feeling pretty good about herself until they told her she's an "elderly gestation".

She was like, WTF?

I told her she looks pretty hot for an old broad! (And I'm older than she is by about 19 months, so I know from whence I speak!) LOL

Age is a number, vitality's a state of mind, and you can't put a price on experience. Ha. So there.

 

[Indigo77]

Please don't give another thought to what this moron wrote. Not only is she stupid, but she is seriously irresponsible. Read her other posts about car seat safety...and you'll see what I mean...https://www.babyandbump.com/baby-club/632341-car-seat-position-2.html
She decided to put her own child at risk for her comfort. Amazing!

 

[dachsundmom]

Please don't give another thought to what this moron wrote. Not only is she stupid, but she is seriously irresponsible. Read her other posts about car seat safety...and you'll see what I mean...https://www.babyandbump.com/baby-club/632341-car-seat-position-2.html
She decided to put her own child at risk for her comfort. Amazing!

First off, I didn't even know that board existed! But, OMG...that's all I can say . I pretty much considered that subject very straight forward, lol.

I realize we all do stupid things, I've posted on here a few times about my lack of cooking skills and I keep trying, but damn!

You've definitely helped me put it in perspective, but I am truly sick to my stomach after reading it.

 

[velo]

Ok seriously wish you hadn't posted that, I did not need to smack my forehead and go WHY WHY do these people get to be parents?

 

[Indigo77]

i was just so amazed, i simply had to share it with all my old lovelies...

seriously, though...she must be a troll...no one is that dense...

 

[cebethel]

Holy crap, just when I thought "it" could'nt get any worse............

How is this loon able to breed in the first place???

 

[Macwooly]

I feel so sorry and worry for that woman's child

I think her reply on that thread sums up what she is like as a person

So when do we think she'll end up on the Jeremy Kyle show (for those in the UK) or the Maury show or Jerry Springer (for those in the US)?