What do you teach your kids about strangers?

[SarahBear]

We haven't really talked about "stranger danger" at all, but we recently read the Berenstain Bears book about strangers and Violet is pointing things out like when she's talking to someone she doesn't know. While reading the book, we talked about how it is OK to talk to strangers and we've pointed out how it would be silly if you NEVER talked to them. We also talked about why the book was right when it said to not go anywhere with a stranger. With how she is with strangers and with the questions she's been asking and the book we've read, I'm thinking now would be a really good time to talk about stranger safety. I don't want to teach her to just never talk to strangers though. First of all, it's not realistic or practical, and it's not what's recommended anyway. I want to teach her stranger skills, not stranger "danger." I also think it wouldg be a good time to start teaching her about what to do in certain emergency situations and make sure she knows my phone number and our address. Need to figure out how to do it without freaking her out though, hah! Perhaps role playing with toys would help.

What do you teach your kids about strangers and various emergency situations or what to do if they get separated from you?

 

[Nibblenic]

We spoke and said that if anyone ever asks you to go anywhere with them away from your mummy/daddy/ they are not go but find us and ask to go. This goes for children and adults.

We also said that if someone youve just met makes you feel anything negative, sad or uncomfortable or if you just dont feel right around them, come back to us.

The fact is she is never really far from family or professionals supervision at the minute, she can always come back to us. So that helps.

I have always said if you get lost try and find someone in a uniform or with a badge. Try and stay roughly where you are and tell people that you need to find X and they look like etc

I also strongly agree the flat rule of don talk to people you dont know is not only impractical but can actually be more dangerous.

 

[Rags]

I've not gone into great detail about 'stranger danger' beyond that fact that he should never go away with any adult (or child) that he doesn't know without speaking to me or the adult watching him. My son is always out and about with an adult he knows and doesn't play out unwatched (he's 6). I have spent time explaining about his body, 'private' areas etc, as statistically he's more at risk from people he knows than strangers. I've explained that no one should ever ask to see or touch him anywhere 'private' and that anything that makes him uncomfortable is important to speak to me about. 'Secret' is a word that we never use - we never have secrets, we can have surprises relating to birthdays/gifts etc but if he's ever told 'it's our secret' then it's something he should tell me about. I don't want him to fear the world around him but I want him to be aware of others - he is to young to judge if someone is good or bad so I'm doing that for him until he can.

 

[sabby52]

Declan is a bit older but we have had the stranger chat a few times, he knows never to go with anyone that he doesnt know and he also knows that if the person says his mummy/daddy/brother said he could go with them he has to ask for the secret word, our secret word is only known by me, his dad and his brother, and he knows if we ask someone to collect him we will tell them the secret word to pass on to him.

My son has been enrolled in a childs first aid course which will teach him what to do in emergency situations, he knows how to dial 999 but at the course he will be taught who to ask for, what to say and how to stay calm and talk clearly. The courses take children from 4 years old x

 

[Banshee]

We also haven't done much stranger danger talk with the boys mostly because I know that statistically children are more at risk from someone they know. The boys know to stay with mummy/daddy/grandma etc and not to go off with anyone else and that it's ok to not want to talk to people you don't know.
We've also discussed the PANTS rule re their private area and also that if anyone touches them in a way they don't like they should tell me and that they won't be in trouble etc etc.

 

[Natsku]

Haven't discussed 'strangers' specifically, just that she is never to go anywhere with anyone without first asking permission from me or OH - doesn't matter if she knows them or not, the rule is still the same. She's taken it to heart I think as when she's playing out she always comes first to ask me (or calls me if she has her phone with her) if she's allowed to go to the neighbour's house.

I've told her if she ever gets lost from me she is to stay where she is as if she keeps moving around it'll be harder for me to find her but if she stays still then I can find her.

 

[SpringerS]

We haven't had a stranger danger style talk yet and I know that at this point in time it would go in one ear and out the other because in DS' world view, very literally, a stranger is just a friend he hasn't met. He genuinely believes everyone in the world is a friend and he just has to get to know them. We're never really apart at the moment and I have taught him a nursery rhyme style song about getting lost that includes my mobile number, twice repeated. I've told him that if he does get lost, either go to someone working there (if we're in a shop, business premises), to a police officer or to another mum with little kids.

And we've talked about private body parts and things no-one shoudl ever do with a kid but tbh, I know he hasn't taken it in. He has gotten very good however, at standing back from someone who is doing something he is uncomfortable with, putting his hand out and saying, 'stop, I don't want you to.... whatever is bothering him.'

 

[Bingo]

Try looking up Tricky People on Google. Children learn that adults don't ask children for help, they ask other adults.

 

[k4th]

We talk about strangers sometimes - but mostly I make sure dd knows she can tell me anything, we've talked about the pants rule & we talk about "safe" people. If dd is lost (not that she ever has been) she knows to look for someone with a badge first, but if she can't immediately see someone, then to find a mummy with children.

We have played emergency services & she knows what needs a 999 call & what doesn't. She also knows our address.