what really sucks

[ArtIsLife]

Is when you're waiting to try till spring because of finances, but things money related are getting worse not better, and I just know when it comes time to TTC like we planned, he is going to say we should wait longer... I keep having dreams abut being pregnant, its killing my heart to wait. We really would be fine money wise but DH is way too careful with everything and I feel like there will always be something in the way of it being the right time. He is 47 and I am 27 so I want to TTC now cuz he is only getting older. Lol. But yeah so depressing. :.(

 

[babydustcass]

My general feeling is there is never a 'perfect' time to have a baby. Babies can cost as little or as much as you want them to. I think you just make it work

 

[Lozzielaula]

I agree with babydustcass, it can be so frustrating trying to show that to the OH though. There never is a perfect time, you just make it work. Sorry things arent going your way

 

[ArtIsLife]

That's how I feel too, but like you said, its hard to get my husband to understand it.

 

[aidensxmomma]

Sorry to hear that things aren't working out as planned

I agree with what the other ladies have said, though. There really is no "perfect" time. You make it work and babies are only as expensive as you make them.

Hopefully you can figure out a way to get your husband to understand. Have you talked to him about how you're feeling worried that he's going to back out and make you wait longer?

 

[ArtIsLife]

Ive been avoiding bringing it up because he has been so stressed about money lately and he has been exhausted from work, that I feel like he would be upset with me for not understanding that we are in a tight spot at the moment. I will probably try to bring it up when he is in a super good mood soon.

Also, we have to find health insurance somehow, we both dont have insurance through work. so I'm afraid that will hold us back too.

 

[vrogers]

aw, I can relate. we're waiting mainly for financial reasons and sometimes it feels like it's not getting better. I just have a part time job, and my husband's income is super unpredictable. also, I'm 22 and he's 29 so I understand the age deal haha!

I hope it starts improving SOON for ya'll!

 

[vrogers]

I also need to find health insurance ASAP! we missed the deadline for me to be added on at his work (nobody told him, he's still mad haha) and the whole process is making me want to pull my hair out.

 

[ArtIsLife]

Yup, I have no idea what we are going to do for insurance, I might have to try to find a full time job that has insurance just so we can afford to have a baby. And I'm a full time self employed artist right now, so it would be giving up part of my dream.

 

[Angel_blues]

Are there no private or government insurance companies you can sing up with? Not sure how it works for Americans...

 

[Earthylove]

yeah the finance and insurance thing is a concern for us too. Still waiting for the DH to get a new job that has better pay and benefits. he's had a few leads but we're sort of in a waiting period right now. I work part time and go to grad school part time and my DH works part time. He is really hoping/trying to find full time work. plus, i won't be working much longer because I will be starting my internship full time, so that is putting us in an even tighter spot. insurance and higher pay are definitely big things on our minds right now. Especially since we plan to ttc within the next year! argh

 

[Ohbaby2015]

I feel you on the insurance and money thing! I switched jobs this past year so we could have affordable and good health benefits in hopes of TTC this upcoming year! It was a huge reason I left my old job and meant I was one step closer. . I think you are smart to figure out your health care first though because having a baby can be expensive without and even with health insurance! Can you get a private policy? if not, can you work part time at a place like Starbucks, who offers part time employees great benefits? I worked there all through college and had a great deal on health care. Good luck!

 

[Flip flop]

I'm in a similar boat, I think we can afford another but he doesn't. By the time we actually got pregnant and had a baby ds would practically be in school so I don't see the problem.

 

[ArtIsLife]

I would but my husband makes just barely too much for most programs, and obamacare would be super expensive. Ugh, we feel stuck.

 

[babydustcass]

I have no idea how the health system works over there in America, but i can see how it would stunt your ability to have a child if you dont have the insurance to cover the care and birth. We are so lucky to the NHS here in the UK, i would never have thought to even worry about how im going to pay for the delivery. I hope you can get it sorted!

 

[tverb84]

Here in Ontario delivery is covered by OHIP so the parents don't have to pay.

 

[Angel_blues]

Here in Ontario delivery is covered by OHIP so the parents don't have to pay.

Us too. Every single doctors appointment here is covered under Alberta health care... Plus it's free... If you want other care like doula or midwife, you pay for those...

I dont know how you ladies manage down south! I couldn't even imagine the cost you need to consider before becoming pregnant... I wish you all super luck and hope you all find a way

 

[babydustcass]

My friend in the US had triplets, c-sec and time in Neonatal, thank goodness they had insurance because her bill ran into the millions of $! I just cannot imagine!
How much full comp Health insurance in the US if you dont mind me asking? Also do you have the problem of Docs taking advantage of the system charging over the odds for Meds and procedures knowing that health insurance will have to fork out anyway? I find it hard to believe it costs anywhere near a million $ for a triplet pregnancy, birth and a few month in neonatal.

 

[mzdyce]

My friend in the US had triplets, c-sec and time in Neonatal, thank goodness they had insurance because her bill ran into the millions of $! I just cannot imagine!
How much full comp Health insurance in the US if you dont mind me asking? Also do you have the problem of Docs taking advantage of the system charging over the odds for Meds and procedures knowing that health insurance will have to fork out anyway? I find it hard to believe it costs anywhere near a million $ for a triplet pregnancy, birth and a few month in neonatal.

Some doctors do take advantage and overbill for certain procedures; my experience is that some dentists are notorious for doing that, can't say for obgyn. In terms of paying for health insurance: before I was added to my husband's plan, I sought independent coverage and the amount was obscene. The average cost was $592 per month and did not cover things such as specialists visits. In addition, the cap was very low so any two or three things can result in maxing out your deductible. However, since joining my husband's plan, we pay $84 per month and that includes vision, health, and dentist with no co-pay for annual visits.

ArtIsLife, I understand waiting to try due to insurance. The first year of our marriage we did the same. Best of luck discussing it with your husband and getting it sorted.

 

[ArtIsLife]

I can totally believe that the birth (c-section and neonatal) of triplets could be in the millions. Especially if they were in the neonatal for a while. In the U.S. procedures etch are suuuuuuper expensive, if you dont have insurance and something bad happens, like you need surgery or cancer etc, you could be in debt for the rest of your life.

Insurance can cost $200 a month-ish(taken out of paychecks if you have insurance through work) but now if we took advantage of Obamacare (the USA's new forced national insurance) then we would pay $350 a month just to keep our same doctor (my DH has a few medical issues and he has had the same dr for years and wants to stay with him).