What To Do Now?

[ButternutBabe]

Hey everyone, I was 6weeks and 5days. I started bleeding last night and went to the emergency room today. I miscarried.

I've done all my crying, I just want to know when I can try again. My husband and I had been TTC for six months, this was our first pregnancy.

 

[Rhiannon137]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Even though you were seen in the ER, do you have a regular ObGyn? It's probably worth a phone call for advice. The advice on how long to wait seems to differ, but is usually not very long after an early loss. Many doctors advise waiting one normal cycle after the MC, but that is apparently just to make it easier to date a new pregnancy. Some advise waiting a little longer.

I wish you the best of luck going forwards.

 

[Amygdala]

I'm sorry for your loss! In the UK, the advice is that you can try again straight away, although waiting one cycle makes dating easier. If you like, come over to the TTC after a loss section and join us in Spring Rainbows!

 

[theiska]

Yes, you can try right away. My midwife says that advice to wait 3 months is old. For the past 5 years it has been recommended there is no need to wait. Furthermore, pregnancies conceived 6 months after a loss might be more viable than if the spread is longer. Jury is out on the last bit.

 

[theiska]

...OH do wait until bleeding stops, as having sex before that can increase risk of infection due to your cervix being dilated.

 

[ttc126]

Oh I'm so sorry for your loss. Looks like other ladies have given much better advice. I'm new to this whole thing too. It's truly awful. I guess I'm surprised my numbers haven't decreased very quickly. In 48 hrs hcg was only down 30 points.

 

[Trying4first1]

So sorry for your loss. It is such an emotional and stressful time I have always been told to wait for one cycle to try again. Not just for dating purposes but for the lining to build back up nicely too. I always find that I don't ovulate the cycle after I miscarry but I know that everyone is different.

Good luck

 

[lesondemavie]

Hey butter, I'm in a very similar boat. We conceived for the first time on our 6th cycle of trying, and I just found out yesterday at my 8 week scan that our little sprout passed away at 6.5 weeks. My body was hanging on to the bean, so I took misoprostol last night. While I'm devastated bc I want so very much to be a mom, I'm so happy that I was pregnant. Our little gremlin was a gift, and I treasured each day. He or she will forever be in my heart. I think we can both look to the future with hope, knowing now that we can conceive. We have our little lost angels to thank for that. Hope our ttc journies are even shorter this time around. All the best to you

 

[ttc126]

Hey butter, I'm in a very similar boat. We conceived for the first time on our 6th cycle of trying, and I just found out yesterday at my 8 week scan that our little sprout passed away at 6.5 weeks. My body was hanging on to the bean, so I took misoprostol last night. While I'm devastated bc I want so very much to be a mom, I'm so happy that I was pregnant. Our little gremlin was a gift, and I treasured each day. He or she will forever be in my heart. I think we can both look to the future with hope, knowing now that we can conceive. We have our little lost angels to thank for that. Hope our ttc journies are even shorter this time around. All the best to you

Oh leso I saw you over here and my heart breaks! I'm so sorry! This is awful. Please feel free to message if you want...in the same boat with my September Snuggler

 

[lesondemavie]

Oh leso I saw you over here and my heart breaks! I'm so sorry! This is awful. Please feel free to message if you want...in the same boat with my September Snuggler

Thanks ttc, so sweet! It is awful, but I just know we'll all be ok We're certainly in good company. Let's definitely stay in touch and keep updated. Always good to know you're not alone in the hand you've been dealt.

 

[ButternutBabe]

Hey everyone, thank you all so much for the support. I'm usually on this site daily but just haven't been able to face it since I originally made this post.

I've only just stopped bleeding, this definitely didn't play out as a normal cycle. Every time I saw the blood it felt like a dagger in my heart.

It seems this week all my friends have talked about is children and how much they don't want them. I want a baby so badly, I can't at all tell them what I'm going through without receiving comments about how it's a "blessing in disguise".

 

[ttc126]

Hey everyone, thank you all so much for the support. I'm usually on this site daily but just haven't been able to face it since I originally made this post.

I've only just stopped bleeding, this definitely didn't play out as a normal cycle. Every time I saw the blood it felt like a dagger in my heart.

It seems this week all my friends have talked about is children and how much they don't want them. I want a baby so badly, I can't at all tell them what I'm going through without receiving comments about how it's a "blessing in disguise".

I'm sorry. I've honestly been shocked at the stupid things people say. The appropriate response is "I'm sorry, do you need anything" and nothing else! Not a blessing to lose a much wanted baby. I'm so sorry.

 

[ttc126]

Mine also has been nothing like a cycle. My doctor was extremely helpful. Do you have one you can see for a follow-up?

 

[stiletto_mom]

I am waiting to miscarry. Should be any day now. Hoping to get a D&C done though instead of naturally passing so we can start TTCing again soon.

I've given myself the up to the day I miscarry (plus two days) to grieve appropriately, and then I'll move one. It wouldn't be fair to rob my next pregnancy of the same happiness and excitement (at least that's how I feel). I have to put a deadline on my grieving process, for me anyway.

I'm so deeply sorry you are going through this. Even though it's physically over, take care of yourself emotionally as well.