What's your opinion on dummy use?

[PetiteMoi]

A couple of days ago we started giving our 1 month old a dummy (soother) in the evenings when she's usually got her 'crying time' and it seems to calm her down. However, DH is very dubious when it comes to using a dummy as he thinks the baby can get too used to it and will need it all the time. Whereas I think the baby's got a natural need to suck and as it calms her down why not use it, instead of letting her cry herself all warm and sweaty??

DH is downstairs now trying to calm her down without using a dummy, which she was sucking on before in my arms being really nice and calm. I don't agree with it and my heart bleeds as I hear her crying her heart out downstairs and he won't give her her dummy

What do you girls think?? This is driving me and DH apart and I'm really scared we won't be able to agree on this and perhaps many other points in the future!!!!

 

[RainbowDrop_x]

I gave Olivia one when she was born like you said because of the need to suckle all the time. Do I regret giving it to her? At the start I did because if she nodded of sucking it & it fell out I had to get up and pop it back in..This could happen 6 or 7 times a night!! Now she's older though she's not to bothered with it although she does still use it nod off if it falls out she's happy enough without it. I can't stand hearing her cry. That I didn't want her to start sucking her thumb!

 

[smokey]

My view has always been if its needed or wanted by the baby then use it, if the baby doesnt take to it or want it then fine.

Maybe try something like a muslin cloth as a comferter instead but its up to you to decide if your comfertable with your LO having this at bedtime.
I used to let my LO have it untill he had fallen asleep then move it so as not to get tangled or smother himself (although muslins are very breathable and one of the safer options)
Babies do have a natural sucking reflex and with most it will calm them down, could you not try a compramise with your husband as in your LO will only have it at bedtime as a comferter and thats it.
Brian only had his at bedtime and if he got upset in the car because it was very difficult to comfert him any other way safely in a moving car.

 

[xxembobxx]

Only my eldest DD had a dummy and that was because my sister gave her it. It was easy enough to get rid of it when she was a year old and she only ever had it on an evening/night anyway.
I'm lucky in that my LO's have been quite content as babies - I have friends who have a colicky baby and a dummy provides much needed comfort when the baby doesn't need anything else. If a baby wants comfort a dummy can be a useful tool.
Hope you manage to sort out with your OH how to proceed. Thinking about it now my OH is really anti-dummies so he would be against me giving LO one if I thought he needed it but if I thought it was necessary I would explain to OH my reasons.

 

[hannahR]

I think if baby wants it, it works for baby and it works for you then you should use it. xx

 

[Pessimistic]

Before I had my lo I bought some dummies, tbh I didn't see the issue. I gave her them for a couple of months or so then when she started to use her hands she used to just take them out so we didn't bother after that, but she started to suck two fingers to settle herself and she does this now all the time.
My opinion is, we have been told that lo sucking her fingers could halm her dental development.. although I don't agree with this as they are not yet 'permanant' teeth.. that being said I can't take her fingers away.. you can a dummy. Also I'm pretty sure some dummys are certified by dental professionals or something?
I don't see a problem with them at an early age.

 

[Baby France]

My dad gave me this advice when my little boy was born. He told me that he didn't agree with dummies...which led to me and my two elder sisters sucking our thumb/fingers. My dad said that he gave my two youngest sisters dummies and they's stopped using a dummy by the time they were 2/3 and at 11 I was still sucking my thumb!!!

One thumb is still smaller than my other to this day - you can take dummies away but you can't take away fingers and thumbs and babies will find a way of soothing some how!!

And surely your OH doesn't want to spend the rest of the next how ever many months 'soothing' the baby to sleep?

Good luck x

 

[bluebaby]

I don't think there is any harm in giving a LO a dummy if it helps soothe them. I give Madelyn a dummy only when she is tired and is going to bed or for a nap and it really calms her down and helps to send her to sleep.

Whats the worse that can happen - Just think what works for you all now

 

[Sam9kids]

My opinion?

Dummies are the best invention EVER!!! lol!

Seriously, the baies have them at night and naps and thats it

 

[greenlady]

I held off using a dummy for 3 weeks and when I finally gave in it was a godsend, Flora was very sucky and quite irritable so it helped her a lot. Now at 5 months she still has a dummy mostly for naps and bedtime, but also when she's just a bit narky it can chill her out. But lately I've been purposely not giving it to her and even pulling it out of her mouth when she's relaxed, and sometimes I try to get the thumb in as well, because I'd like to wean her off it soonish. Having said that they are recommended for babies that have reflux which she does.

I think if it allows you some sanity then you shouldn't berate yourself for it. And if she continues to have crying time, your hubby will probably come round in a few days as well. If it works, why not?

 

[Snowball]

My first two wouldn't settle without a dummy so I assumed Ozzie would be the same. I stocked up on them before he was born and he just wasn't interested. I tried him loads of times but he'd spit it out after 30 seconds. After two that loved them it was a little shocking

Ozzie just loves to suck on his blanket. He refuses to settle without it... which is a little difficult if it's wash day

 

[hannahR]

My opinion?

Dummies are the best invention EVER!!! lol!

Seriously, the baies have them at night and naps and thats it

Im adopting this rule with Hazel and seems to be working well. xx

 

[smokey]

My husband also had a thing against dummies and said no way, I made him stay up all night looking after a very colicy 4 week old baby one night and guess what, Brian had a dummy by the morning

 

[Cheryl xx]

When i was pregnant i always said i wouldn't give a dummy. When Grace was 2/3 months old i took her to the GP because of her constant crying and breastfeeding(but not sucking for milk) My GP told me to give her a dummy, i gave her one that evening and she was calm for the first time with me having to rock her or feed her or try anything to stop her screaming.

I think that if it soothes her, then she obviously needs it xx

 

[SKATERBUN]

My LO will take it or leave it. Its good to get her to sleep, she sucks her hand a lot even when shes not hungry. Its also good for calming her down when shes getting stressed when out shopping
I dont see her becoming attached to it though shes been having one on and off for the past 6 weeks now and she just spits it out when shes had enough.

 

[Sam9kids]

My husband also had a thing against dummies and said no way, I made him stay up all night looking after a very colicy 4 week old baby one night and guess what, Brian had a dummy by the morning

sorry but that made me chuckle!

Mine have blankets too!

 

[rainbows_x]

I am keen to give LO one as she does seem to suck her fingers alot & has her crying period at 5am ish, I hate to hear her cry, breaks my heart

OH isn't keen on it though, as he thinks that she will not give it up & want it all the time and it will be difficult to wean her off it. I would never give her one without him agreeing, just wish I could make him agree!

 

[aob1013]

If used correctly a binky won't pose a problem. Babies have a natural reflex to suck and they are comforted by sucking. We give Leni a binky now and again, but usually i give him a boob instead to comfort suck on.

 

[Sam9kids]

and just for the record, ive never had trouble wa=eaning any of the older kids off theirs! x

 

[smokey]

Why is it always the men that say no to them? half the time they arnt the ones up all night or having to be home with a very upset screaming baby