Why am I the bad person?

[Teri7489]

Some of you may remember my rants about my SIL after my daughter was born so I apologise! Its just she's doing it again. She used to put me down because my dd was formula fed, because we co-sleep and at 2 she still has a bottle at bed time. Now I breast feed/express for my son she's putting me down for using a manual pump, going on about how she got an expensive electric one because she donates her milk to the children's hospital. Last week I mentioned to her that the new men b vaccine given to babies can cause a fever so they now give paracetamol beforehand and give you a prescription to give 2 doses afterward. She snorted saying you don't give 8 week old paracetamol and basically laughed at me for being stupid. I since found out Shea bad mouthed me to my family for suggesting it. Her son is due to have his in a few weeks time so will be interesting to see what she does.

I know they look down their nose at me. They have high paying jobs, big house, 2 cars and 3 kids. I have 2 kids in a one bed council flat, we don't drive and don't have well paid jobs (although I am a nurse she still thinks an idiot) just seems I can't do anything right in her eyes and she makes me look like a waste of space.

Sorry for moaning. My babies are well looked after, are healthy kids, have nice things, have fun days and are loved to bits just wish she could see that!

 

[Bekah78]

I'm sorry your sil is so horrid. You're not a bad person at all. Houses, cars, and high incomes don't make you better than the next person. It sounds to me like she's caught in the hamster wheel feeling constanltly judged and so does it to others to make herself feel better. It's more a reflection of her than you.

 

[k4th]

What a b***h.

Some people are only happy when they are putting other people down. I think it says more about that persons insecurities than the person they're talking about.

As for the men b vaccine - you're absolutely right. Our nurse told me "most babies" will get a fever after it. As it's not a fever that's really needed to help fight off infection, it's best to avoid it by using paracetamol.

No doubt your SIL will say she didn't use it even if she did.

Try to ignore her comments & focus on your lovely, happy little family

 

[Teri7489]

Thank you! Was starting to wonder if I was the one in the wrong. She has made choices I don't agree with but I don't mock her. We all parent differently which is fine. I don't see why she has to be nasty. Worst of it was she talked about me to my sister who is so close to me. I always try to avoid them as the comments are too much at times. Glad they have decided to have Christmas in their own house this year so I can enjoy it without being judged for eating meat, dairy and cake while breastfeeding xxx

 

[Rainbow82]

All you can really do is ignore her, it's her insecurities. With the paracetamol after MenB jab though, you are a nurse, you know why it's needed, you get to pull rank over her on this one. High temp can cause febrile convulsions, why would anyone risk that? DS had a high temperature even with the calpol. At our practice DS was the first baby to get it and before they have it to him they had to get a Dr to sign off on it and they had to tick a box to make sure he has had the paracetamol.

 

[Natasha2605]

Wow, she sounds awful

Chances are she is not so happy in her perfect little life if she feels the need to judge yours so much

 

[tallybee]

She sounds awful hun I'd feel sorry for her really as her life must be pretty miserable to make her treat you or anyone like that xx