Why is it still hurting after 3 months?

[ginger91]

Have been so busy recently that I’ve not managed to write very much on here. I have spent more time reading through other people’s posts and trying my hardest to concentrate on work, home, relationship etc.

I thought I was coping so well but have recently taken a real dip and finding it hard to shift these horrible feelings of anxiety. Should be ovulating but got a sickness bug and think it may have delayed it so that’s not helping my stress levels. Just feel like it’s never going to happen and that it was a fluke that I got pregnant last time. I feel that even if I did get pregnant soon, that I’d still feel this sadness. Actually feel like giving up this month- never thought I’d feel like this. Aren’t things supposed to get easier with time? Anyone else feel like this?

x

 

[TripleB]

I feel exactly the same ginger91, like it was a cruel fluke last time and that it won't happen again any time soon. I think TTC temporarily takes your mind off your loss (although you never totally forget) and then suddenly reality hits (in my case getting first AF 7 weeks after ERPC) and emotionally you're back to square one. Christmas is really hard, I would have had my 20-week scan today and was so looking forward to having a bump on Christmas Day. I can't help feeling that if I was pregnant again already it would ease the pain but I also know that putting pressure on yourself doesn't help.

Just wanted you to know that you're not alone in feeling like this and don't give up hope. I've got everything crossed that 2010 will be a great year for all of us in this situation and that next Christmas it will be a different story. Take care of yourself. x

 

[ginger91]

Thank you for your kind message TripleB . Had just hoped I'd be ok by now. What a horrible thing for us all to go through. Fingers crossed for 2010!xx

 

[aviolet]

when this first happened to me I thought I'd be able to move on faster, but I'm finding I need a lot more time than I ever imagined. In the grand scheme of things time is not the best way to measure my healing progress. It's been a month since I initially miscarried, but I only just passed the baby 4 days ago.... now it's like that whole month never went by and it just happened all over again. In another 2 months I don't see myself being in a much different place emotionally, since time goes very fast and sometimes things take a while to sink in and grieving is not an immediate process, especially with all the distractions and obstacles of life slowing us down. I think it will always hurt, too.... just maybe the pain won't dominate my thoughts like it does now. I'll feel better when I feel better so I'm just trying not to measure it by a timeframe.

 

[2016]

I feel the same

 

[honey08]

it doesnt go away hun i mmc then conceived morgan after another 7mth of ttc , and he my world but im always wondering wot ifs , i think times a healer but u wont ever 4get

i wish u all the best x