Why wont my toddler sleep through?!

[HappyLittleMa]

My LO is 16 months and wakes early every day for a bottle. We started to let him CIO, but he will just moan/whinge for up to an hour. He can wake at 5.30, have a bottle then sleep again until up to 8.30am. I thought that toddlers who had a good balanced diet didn't need to wake for milk? He eats really well in the day, has 8oz at night and 8oz in the morning. Surely the fact that he goes back to sleep means he is still tired - a friend said her kids did the same but she would just get them up for the day and bring them downstairs for their bottle. I'm not ready to do this at 5.30am and I dont think he is either! Please help, this has been going on since he was 8 months old and now with #2 on the way and the fact that I work, I just would really like to sleep through myself!!
Thanks

(Can I just add that he isn't actually crying or screaming, it's loud whinging verging on crying - he just will not settle back)

 

[dizzyspells]

My LO still does not sleep through the night usually wakes up a couple of time between 12 & 3 and its tough.He goes to bed at 7pm.He does not have a bottle but he wakes up for the day at around 5.30 (used to have a bottle) and then goes back for a nap at 10am.He wont go back to sleep when he wakes at this time.

I have no real advice other than I understand how hard it must be for you.We have also tried every trick in the book but to no avail and have just accepted this is how he is and hopefully he will grow out of it soon and start sleeping longer in the morning.He is totally different to my daughter who slept solid 12hrs from age 12wks so was a shock to the system to say the least!

Hope it gets better for you.

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

Hmm, to me that is sleeping through, for ages Ruby woke up for the day at 5.30am, but it has steadily got later most of the time, in the last couple of months.
I personally would sooner get up for the day at 5.30am than listen to my Lo moaning for an hour! Ruby never wanted a bottle that early but if she did I would probably have made it up, brought it back to bed and just lazed in bed and looked a few books etc with her until I'd woken up properly!

 

[dizzyspells]

Hmm, to me that is sleeping through, for ages Ruby woke up for the day at 5.30am, but it has steadily got later most of the time, in the last couple of months.
I personally would sooner get up for the day at 5.30am than listen to my Lo moaning for an hour! Ruby never wanted a bottle that early but if she did I would probably have made it up, brought it back to bed and just lazed in bed and looked a few books etc with her until I'd woken up properly!

Thats just what we do in the morning,you worded it far better than me and thats what we did with regards to the bottle.I too would call it sleeping through if he doesnt wake at all in the night mis read that a little,!!

 

[HappyLittleMa]

But if he hasn't had enough sleep, then technically he isn't 'sleeping through' surely? Even if it is 5-5.30am, he still hasn't finished sleeping. He is actually looking for the bottle, thats the difference. If he was awake and alert for an hour, thats different, but he isn't fully awake. I read that I should try CIO and see what happens, but it isn't working for us.

Dont get me wrong, I am glad he isn't waking at 2 or 3 am, but then again, if he did, it'd be easier for me/us to get back to sleep. But 5ish is so near to morning for us, but obviously not for him.

If I got him up when he starts to stir, he would be so tired for the rest of the day (he isn't a great napper, can have half an hour, can have two hours, there's no pattern).

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

Presumably you have tried settling him without giving him a bottle, or just giving him some water instead of milk?

Or, I have heard of a technique called 'wake to sleep' where you go in about half an hour before they usually wake, kind of half wake them up so they stir, then re settle them, that can help them start a new sleep cycle and not wake half an hour later, and stops the habit. I know that's not appealing to do at like 5am but maybe worth a try!

 

[HappyLittleMa]

To be honest I am willing to try anything - I'd rather he was able to drop this before the new baby comes (got months yet, but I never thought it would last this long!).

Thanks for the advice and tip

 

[dizzyspells]

Presumably you have tried settling him without giving him a bottle, or just giving him some water instead of milk?

Or, I have heard of a technique called 'wake to sleep' where you go in about half an hour before they usually wake, kind of half wake them up so they stir, then re settle them, that can help them start a new sleep cycle and not wake half an hour later, and stops the habit. I know that's not appealing to do at like 5am but maybe worth a try!

Thats interesting might have a look into that myself

 

[hellohefalump]

Madeleine used to wake up, up to eight times a night wanting a bottle, she actually drank so much milk that her poos were disgusting! We eventually cracked it when she was 21 months old. We started putting less and less milk in her bottles and eventually she must of decided it wasnt work waking up for.

 

[mama2b]

There are a few things I would try.

When he wakes up at 5.30 let him fuss for as long as possible and then get up for the day, hard I know but you need to break the habit of him having a bottle. He will soon realise that he is only going to get his milk if he gets up early and hopefully that will stop him waking up.

Had a similar problem with Lucas he didn't sleep through until 9 months and then it was pretty irregular until he was 1. He was still having a bottle at 10.30 every night until he was about 11 1/2 months old which he clearly didn't need but had got into the habit of having it. I started decreasing the amount to start with but it didn't make much difference so we just stopped it altogether. First night he wasn't to impressed and it took him a while to get him back to sleep but by the third night he wasn't waking up for it.

 

[sausages]

I'm jealous!! DD wakes up anything from 2-8 times evey night. All she wants is for us to go in and settle her bak down, but it's so draining! Newborn? Easy. Toddler? RAR!

I would also suggest maybe giving him his dummy instead of a bottle. Or giving water in a sippy instead.

If you go in and see him and try to resettle without the milk what does he do?

 

[jojo2605]

I know how u feel. Sam has always been a pretty awful sleeper. This gets a million times worse when he is teething or unwell & as he's been teething pretty much constantly since 13months we developed some pretty bad habits with him. We had stopped his early wake up for milk (around 1am) at 13 months but as it's been such an awful few months of sleeping with the teething, we started bringing him down stairs to calm him down and basically giving him milk as a comfort too.

We broke this habit and got back into being incredibly strict on him blunt leaving his room of a night at all.

I digress I know, bt wanted to build the picture!! After all this he reverted back to waking at 1am & 5-6ish for milk. I'm due to have another baby in 5 weeks so decided enough was enough and 3 nights ago did controlled crying. He went mad when I said "no milk, sleep time" and cried for 3 hours, with me going in and settling him at 20 min intervals. It was an angry cry/whinge rather than a distressed one. The last 2 nights he hasn't woken up for his 1am bottle so I'm hoping we've cracked that.

Sam too goes back to asleep after his 5-6am bottle so I know he's still tired. I think what I'll do is see if he keeps this up for a week and if so, do CC at 5am until he realises that when he is in bed he doesnt get milk.

Sorry to have waffled but your situation seemed very similar!!

 

[Szaffi]

What time does he go to bed?

Bianka sleeps from 7 pm till 6.30 am - but we leave for work/nursery, etc, so it's normal for us (though a total pain in the weekends).

Anyway, when she started to wake up earlier we never took her out of bed before 6.30 anyway, and only offered her a bottle of water/baby tea in a small bottle with an infant size nipple. She usually fell back asleep. Now I sometimes hear her before 6.30, but doesn't really start properly fussing until 6.30, unless there is something else up (stuffy nose, soiled diaper on a sore bum, etc.)

 

[HappyLittleMa]

Thank you to you all for your replies - he seems to have slightly improved, sleeping till 6.30 instead which is sooo much better. I feel like singing when I see 6 something rather than 5am!!

I always feel that by mentioning something good, he somehow knows or I jinx myself as we seem to go back a step....so on that note, I'm gonna leave it here and hope he wakes at 6.30 tomorrow morning Thanks again

 

[charlotteb24]

My son is 23 months and until 3 weeks ago was waking for 1 or 2 beakers in the night of milk to the point it was filling him up and he wouldn't eat hardly anything all day!
With having a little one on the way too we used the changing milk for water methid and its worked! He now stirrs occasionally but we go in and tell him its time for sleep and not milk and say goodnight and that's him back off to sleep. He mostly doesn't wake at all now!
Tho at 530 that's maybe not so easy to do? Not sure! Noahs habitual stirring was between 12am and 3am normally! But its worth a shot!

 

[andbabymakes3]

Holly went through a stage of waking for milk at 5am, and because I was so sleep deprived I would give it to her - but then it became a habit and she woke every morning without fail at that time. Resulting in her being cranky all day (plus me being cranky!).

I did the same thing I did to stop her middle of the night feeds when she was a bit younger - for a couple of days I gave her boiled water with a little bit of sugar in it, then for a few days just water - and I think once she realised she wasn't getting milk at silly o'clock (when I knew she had eaten plenty the previous day and didn't 'need' milk), she stopped waking up.

Now, if she ever wakes up really early and asks for milk, she is given water. Mean mummy, I know - but she is much happier sleeping until 6:30 (and so am I!).