Wont settle, keeps crying, won't sleep!!!!

[BrollyDolly]

I am at my wits end and I don't know what to do!
She's almost 4 week's old and won't settle unless she's in my arms, as soon as put her down she screams and then carries on until I pick her up. At night she wakes at 3am and then wont sleep again until 7am. I have tried everything...warming the bedding, transferring my scent, hand on chest, white noise, shhh & pat, laying her on her belly, driving in the car...EVERYTHING!!! She has infacol for colic and is also on SMA staydown for reflux. I always make sure she gets wind up before I try and get her to sleep but the only way she will calm down and sleep will be in my arms.
OH, friends and family keep telling me I need to just leave her to cry it out, it won't harm her but I'm not too sure about that technique as I've read a lot of arguments for and against that method and I don't want to seem like a bad mum.
I just don't have a clue what to do, I'm on my own during the week as OH works away and I'm mentally and physically drained thanks to a total of 6 hours sleep all week.

Any advice, tips, suggestions...should I leave her to just cry? Should I just man up and tell myself it won't last?? I don't have a clue what I'm doing and feel like a total failure who has a child that hates her Xx

 

[Kitteh_Kat]

Hang in there, mama She could be going through Wonder Week 5 a little early, where they take their first leap forward. It's pretty scary for them so they crave the one thing they know - their mother. Evelyn was a nightmare for about a week during that period. She did the crying from 3-5 AM and only happy when being carried around. Have you tried putting her in a sling and just wearing her around?

Do you have any family or friends around that can take her for a bit so you can get some solid sleep in?

 

[laila 44]

My dd has been like that this week too except only during the day at night she sleeps. My dr absolutely insists on making her CIO saying that I can't possibly carry her all day long. When I mentioned scaling he said " r u crazy? Do u want to create a monster?" Lol. I just kept soothing her in her space until she stopped and is slowely getting better. I refuse to carry her all day that's not realistic I have another child to take care of. Now baby is hanging out in her bouncy chair resting. Keep trying to sooth in her space and eventually she'll stop

 

[laila 44]

*sling*

 

[Pielette]

My LO was like this. He still only naps in the carrier but hey ho. I need my hands free for my toddler so just put him in there.

At night we bedshare (or have until tonight, it's his first night in his cot). It was the only way he would sleep, snuggled up next to me. He's gradually getting better, he used to refuse to let me leave him to sleep in the evening and now he sleeps from bedtime (7.30 ish) on his own until we come to bed at around 10.30pm. So what I'm trying to say is it doesn't last forever. My baby came as a big surprise to me, my eldest would just sleep wherever whenever and I was in a state over it for a long time. But I can see the gradual improvements and you will too.

Hang in there! And google fourth trimester.

 

[Katerpillar]

congratulations on your new arrival!

I second the sling suggestion -if all she wants is to be kept close, keep her close! She is so little and has been all cosy inside of you for 9 months and is probably wondering what the hell happened! Ha! You absolutely CANNOT spoil a newborn! I know how hard it is in the beginning - my head was up my arse for months!! But we stumbled through somehow. I kept my baby attached to me as much as possible - I let her comfort suck, I bedshared and I wore her and now she self settles to sleep in her own cot - so please do not worry about creating bad habits! 4 weeks is far too young to let her cry though - she needs you! Do whatever you have to do to get you through. I promise you it gets easier xxxx

 

[optimistic1]

It'll pass. My daughter was super clingy as a newborn....still is a bit clingy but she doesn't NEED me to sleep anymore once I get her asleep and in bed or her swing she's fine. Do you have a swing? I would try getting her to sleep in that (my daughter takes her day naps in a swing because I couldn't handle holding her the entire time anymore) I know eventually I'll have to break her of the swing but there was no way I was leaving my newborn to cry (my Los ped recommended this). Any way that you can get her to sleep do it....but I would let her cry especially if she's possibly uncomfortable without you due to reflux.

 

[nzjade]

Awww please don't let her cry it out, she's so so little. Agree with the baby wearing suggestion - it honestly won't last forever and before you know it you'll blink and she will be 4 months old!! (My current situation lol). Is co-sleeping, at least for now, an option? x