Would this annoy you? (Angry at OH!)

[PrettyFlowers]

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[Angelbaby_01]

I would say it's a shame if a woman doesn't appreciate her husband is he is good looking, descent and just wonderful. If it is the one cheating then I would make a remark yes, but me and DH talk a lot about other women or men and say what we think. He is not perving.

Please say if I understood you incorrectly.

 

[LouOscar01]

Hmmm my OH says this about women on TV but not often about people we know...when he does I can get a bit irritated, but...if he is saying it to you then that's probably not really a negative thing. He trusts that you trust him and he probably thought nothing of telling you. It's not possible for you to be the only person in the world that he thinks is attractive. I wouldn't worry! He is with you because he loves you and thinks you are the MOST gorgeous person! xx

 

[PrettyFlowers]

I would say it's a shame if a woman doesn't appreciate her husband is he is good looking, descent and just wonderful. If it is the one cheating then I would make a remark yes, but me and DH talk a lot about other women or men and say what we think. He is not perving.

Please say if I understood you incorrectly.

It's not my OH who cheated, it was his friend. Of course I appreciate him, but I don't appreciate him making remarks like that. We talk about other people together and can say "He/she is good looking" and generally we will agree with each other, but it ticks me off when there is no need for him to say it. He could have just said "She's really nice and doesn't reserve that".

 

[PrettyFlowers]

Hmmm my OH says this about women on TV but not often about people we know...when he does I can get a bit irritated, but...if he is saying it to you then that's probably not really a negative thing. He trusts that you trust him and he probably thought nothing of telling you. It's not possible for you to be the only person in the world that he thinks is attractive. I wouldn't worry! He is with you because he loves you and thinks you are the MOST gorgeous person! xx

The thing is I know he loves me/finds me attractive etc, and generally I do not kick up a fuss when he says stuff like that. I think it just annoyed me because sometimes I feel as though he does it on purpose to get a reaction from me, and now I've finally given him one, which has made me even madder lol

 

[HBGirl]

I think you over reacted.

 

[mandaa1220]

I think you overreacted as well, but I think a lot of women do the same in those situations.

OH and I are pretty open about whether people are attractive or we think they're good looking in real life, on TV, or in books (if we're talking about me & Christian Grey ). OH is less so than me; however, I don't really care if he thinks anyone else is hot. I look at other people and think they're attractive, so he obviously does too. Why shouldn't he be able to say it out loud, rather than be forced to keep it in his head, almost like a secret. Just because your OH thinks other people are attractive, doesn't mean he thinks any less of you.

If your OH had been like "damn that girl is so fine... I'd want a piece of that" or said it in a vulgar or demeaning way to you, it'd be really out of order and the fight would be acceptable IMO.

 

[lucy_smith]

Me and bf discuss other people, saying they are good looking, but he used the phrase window shopping! And I completely agree that you can look but don't touch, because at the end of the day everyone looks and says he is or she is good looking. But as long as nothing happens then its harmless in my opinion.
I feel happy that my bf feels comfortable with our relationship that he doesnt need to hide his opinions!

 

[Angelbaby_01]

I didn't mean your OH cheated, but maybe didn't come accross clearly and correctly with what I meant, but most ladies on here already said what I tried to say in a much better manner than I could.

 

[PrettyFlowers]

If your OH had been like "damn that girl is so fine... I'd want a piece of that" or said it in a vulgar or demeaning way to you, it'd be really out of order and the fight would be acceptable IMO.

Hahaha, that made me laugh out loud.

I am well aware that I sound like a crazy controlling girlfriend, and rest assured I am really not. He regularly says "... is very attractive" and I will usually agree, or sometimes I will point out a smokin' woman to him and he will agree, but this morning just really grinded my gears. I guess I just didn't understand why he would have to say that instead of just "She's a lovely person and didn't deserve that". I think it's because I am more considerate of his feelings and wouldn't ever say anything like that to him.

 

[Veronicaco]

IMO he was kind of saying - I can't understand why he would cheat on her she's really attractive AND a nice person so what could the incentive be to be unfaithful. Like if she was a nob or really unattractive and his mate cheated on her with someone who had more desirable attributes then it might make a bit more sense as to why he would risk his relationship.

My hubby would say the same sort of thing but I know he's only appraising the situation in a realistic way. I enjoy his honesty - makes me know I can trust him x

 

[wombat1]

It wouldn't annoy me. My partner tells me about dreams he has of sleeping with other women and it's sort of a running joke between us that he tells when new women show up where he works (there are almost zero women working there) and I ask if they are hot. He loves me and doesn't want to upset me and I trust him so it doesn't bother me at all.

 

[Button#]

It wouldn't bother me at all. Maybe it was relevant in that the woman he cheated on her with wasn't as attractive.

 

[callmedan]

to be honest, this would kinda annoy me. i think its ok to comment on people that are out of reach (celebs etc) as long as it is tasteful or jokey, not too serious! i think what would annoy me most is it being someone he knows and that... i dont know he was probably just saying it because he felt sorry for her though!

 

[lucy_smith]

Wombat1 my bf tells me about his dreams too!!! He had one lady week with a hot dark haired women and he can't put a name on who she was , so he's keeping an eye on the tv to see if it can remind him! Lol is it normal to have these conversations?lol

 

[neuroctopus]

Frankly, if I was in this situation, I would be more upset with my husband knowing about infidelity, and keeping it a secret from the guy's wife to protect his friend. (I don't know if your OH is doing that or not, but I would be WAY more concerned about this poor woman's life than if my husband was complimenting her)

 

[emicakess]

I see a lot of people very open with their significant others but every relationship is different! Every person is different! Me personally, I get a tiny bit annoyed with the BF mentions girls like celebrities, but I know that is irrational and I hold my tongue hehe. But as someone mentioned earlier, if it were about someone we knew I would be piiiiiiiiiiiiissed lol. I am not saying that we don't overreact, I am just saying you are not alone haha ^_^ don't worry too much okay? I know how you feel though. It sounded a little like he was gawking over her, and I would not like that either. But don't read too much into it, most of the time if you have a good man they are innocent, they just say stupid things, and we take it the wrong way haha

 

[baileybubs]

I think sometimes every situation is different and it can depend how you are feeling within yourself too on how you can take comments like that. I can definately understand it as I don't think I'd be very happy if my df called one of our friends gorgeous but I think in that case I wouldn't say anything, because it wasn't like he was saying "she's hot I'd sleep with her". But I can definately relate because not long after I gave birth my df commented on a friend of his on Facebook saying she looked "fit". I was so upset because at that time I felt fat and horrible with a c section scar and my hair was falling out and I was barely getting time to shower and shave my legs lol! So the comment made me feel really bad about myself, but now I'm feeling better I probably wouldn't feel as bad.
So it can just depend on how it is said, your emotional state at the time, whether he's insinuated he finds her gorgeous before..... Does that make sense?

 

[Eline]

I think you overreacted. He didn't do anything wrong. You should be happy he talks openly with you. It won't benefit your relationship if he has to hold his tongue when talking to you for fear of being screamed at for even the smallest remark.

 

[PrettyFlowers]

To be honest I'm not the most secure person, and I'm not sure why really. I know I'm not ugly, but I do spend a lot of my time comparing myself to other people. I work so so hard to talk sense into myself (He loves ME, he's with me for a reason, he compliments me all the time) etc, but I just felt he was out of line here. I bite my tongue on A LOT of occasions, and even agree with him usually.

Sometimes I do think he does it to get a kick out of me because generally I don't let him see that I'm bothered by anything he says about other women.

Hmmmph, maybe I'm just over sensitive