Would you choose midwife or OBGYN for 1st Birth?

[elliot]

Called up for first prenatal visit last night and was told I should decide up front is I want to work with a midwife or OBGYN, that way I'll work with the same person throughout.

They recommended midwife for a 1st baby as they said you get more attention andpersonal care.

My DH is a worrywart though, and he's feeling like an OBGYN would be "safer" if anything goes wrong because "they have all the specific medical training and all." (Sorry if this causes offense... I'm just telling what hubs said, and like I said... he's terrified somethign will go wrong.)

Any other ladies have advice or opinions on this?

Part of me wonders if it really matters, because it seems like when the actual time arrives we'll end up with whichever person, midwife or doc, that's staffing the hospital at the moment.

 

[LadyofRohan]

I'm choosing a midwife for my first.

As long as you have a normal low risk pregnancy then there's no reason to really go with an OBGYN. The midwives are perfectly capable of handling almost everything aside from a c-section and they'd transfer you if that was needed. So it's really a win-win situation....you get more personal care (at my midwifery center they said the OBGYN spends an average of 7 minutes with you per appointment, while a midwife spends an average of 30 minutes) and if there is a medical emergency you can be transferred to a hospital or OBGYN.

 

[elliot]

Wow Lady of Rohan! (And I'm a big fan of LOTR too, BTW!) That's good info. We don't know anything at all going into this, so having 30 minutes instead of 7 sounds really good!

 

[MrsPOP]

I cant decide. I'll probably know half the Doctors already at my hospital but have a fear of a cack-handed MW taking 56 attempts to put a cannula in my cruddy veins.

 

[Tayzee]

I'm choosing a midwife.

If you have a medical condition such as high blood pressure, epilepsy, heart disease, or diabetes your pregnancy will probably be considered high risk. In this case, you'll be better with an obgyn.
If you already have a good relationship with a certified nurse midwife, an ob-gyn, or family practitioner who provides prenatal care and delivers babies, you may want to stay right where you are.
If you're looking for a practitioner who is more likely to take a holistic approach to your care – and to see birth as a normal process, intervening only when necessary and not routinely – you may prefer a midwife.
In general, midwives tend to have more time to answer all your questions and help you learn about the physical and emotional changes you experience throughout pregnancy. A midwife can also help you think about what kind of birth experience you want – and she'll support you in your decision. For example, a midwife will guide you through an unmedicated labor if that's what you choose, but an epidural will still be an option if you're giving birth in a hospital.
That said, there are some physicians who provide this kind of personalized care, too, and some midwives who may not, so find out as much as you can about the practices in your community. You may want to consider interviewing midwives as well as doctors before making your final decision..

 

[elliot]

Thanks ladies! Some great advice here.

Tayzee - I love the idea of finding a midwife who really works for us, and interviewing sounds like a really smart way to do it. But I feel like I'm not even sure how I would go about that. I do know there's one particular midwife in my hospital who gets rave reviews.... so I'm tempted to go with her for starters.

I think I'm pretty low risk, and we don't currently have an established anyone, so we're starting from scratch with whoever we choose.

 

[Tayzee]

Thanks ladies! Some great advice here.

Tayzee - I love the idea of finding a midwife who really works for us, and interviewing sounds like a really smart way to do it. But I feel like I'm not even sure how I would go about that. I do know there's one particular midwife in my hospital who gets rave reviews.... so I'm tempted to go with her for starters.

I think I'm pretty low risk, and we don't currently have an established anyone, so we're starting from scratch with whoever we choose.

If you figure out a birthing plan, and have all the questions you want to know ready, phone them up, tell them waht you want, ask what you want and see what they say. If you aren't too sure about one, move on to the next. It's better to have a midwife or doctor that you are 110% comfortable with. Good luck x

 

[elliot]

Thanks Tayzee - OH just set up a meeting for us with what we think is our 1st choice hospital for Monday. So I'll use your suggestions in talking with them too.

Then once I get them lined up I'll be ready to choose from the midwives and OBGYNs they work with.

After your comments, I think I'm leaning midwife.

 

[ChristinaRN]

Elliot- if you choose midwife and things start to go wrong there is ALWAYS an obgyn doc as back up.....that is the law here in the US (at least for hospital births). I have found midwives to be VERY knowledgeable and have just as much experience if not more than some doctors. Usually a midwife has been a L&D nurse for years before going to school to become a midwife (a masters degree). Some doctors step foot out of residency and have only been in the delivery setting for 2 years as a resident (again, a masters degree). Choose what you feel is best for you and fits who you are and what type of birth you want. You can always change docs/midwife if you need to.

 

[MrsPOP]

Christina, I thought Doctors over in the US were MD's which is a Doctorate in Medicine not a Masters degree? Although MWs are extremely capable, I think you cannot compare the two degrees they do in order to choose, whereas experience is vital and thats where I can see MW's winning that argument. I would personally trust the Docs more than the MWs purely after my experiences and observations on the labour ward when I was in med school but obviously it may be different over there in the US.

 

[Palestrina]

I'm going ob/gyn all the way. I'm not into that whole natural birthing process. I want a doctor, I want a hospital, I want drugs. I want to know that if something goes wrong that the person who is delivering me knows what to do and isn't passing me off to somebody else.

 

[elliot]

I'm going ob/gyn all the way. I'm not into that whole natural birthing process. I want a doctor, I want a hospital, I want drugs. I want to know that if something goes wrong that the person who is delivering me knows what to do and isn't passing me off to somebody else.

Palestrina - This made me laugh 'cause it sounds just like my husband! I'm kind of afraid of hospitals and hate dealing with doctors and all that, but he wants all the most technical medical stuff possible to "make sure I'm safe."

Hopefully he and I can find a happy medium!

Hope you enjoy your OBGYN birth!

 

[Palestrina]

I'm going ob/gyn all the way. I'm not into that whole natural birthing process. I want a doctor, I want a hospital, I want drugs. I want to know that if something goes wrong that the person who is delivering me knows what to do and isn't passing me off to somebody else.

Palestrina - This made me laugh 'cause it sounds just like my husband! I'm kind of afraid of hospitals and hate dealing with doctors and all that, but he wants all the most technical medical stuff possible to "make sure I'm safe."

Hopefully he and I can find a happy medium!

Hope you enjoy your OBGYN birth!

Glad to make you laugh Seriously though, I am scared beyond belief about giving birth. Under the best circumstances I'll be unconscious during the whole thing and the doc will do a tummy tuck at the same time. I'll be able to wake up to being a skinny mom!

 

[elliot]

Glad to make you laugh Seriously though, I am scared beyond belief about giving birth. Under the best circumstances I'll be unconscious during the whole thing and the doc will do a tummy tuck at the same time. I'll be able to wake up to being a skinny mom!

Truth be told I'm pretty damn scared too! Since I'm only 4+ weeks, I'm finding it pretty easy to just not think about it at this point, but giving birth and being all beat to hell afterwards have always been huge fears for me. Right there with you on that one!

 

[Palestrina]

If it makes you feel any better I have heard from pregnant women that by the 8th and 9th month you will be so uncomfortable with this baby kicking you in the ribs, not getting in a comfy position to sleep, running to the loo all night that you won't care about labor anymore. You'll just want it OUT. It's probably nature's way of helping us overcome the fears of labor. Bring it on!!

 

[daisy118]

I apologize for jumping over from 2nd tri...but I thought your question was interesting and I had never really understood the distinction before. Where I am from, "midwives" aren't super common...everyone goes to an OBGYN. The way I chose mine (and this is where I think it covers both bases of what you are looking for vs your OH) we got referrals from our general practitioner (who is also a personal friend) for OBGYNs. We decided that we would go with his #1 recommendation and if we weren't comfortable, we would pop on over to another one. Anyway, when I called to make my first appt with the MALE OBGYN, I was told that I had to see his nurse practitioner for my first appt and then could see the doctor for all other visits. Well, when I saw her, she spent about 20 minutes with me, answering questions etc. She was very much in tune to what a woman goes thru vs. the 7 min experience of a typical OB. Anyway, long story short, I see her for all of my prenatal visits, both this pregnancy and the last. She is WONDERFUL. My OB...well, he plays "catch" on D day and does great stiches! Haha! The "doctor" I see was a labor and delivery nurse for ever before advancing to "whatever her title officially is now." She also assists the OB on c-sections so she has seen a lot.

Also, I can totally relate to being scared of the actual birth...unfortunately, I never got to the stage of "I just want it out" at 8 or 9 months...I was still scared. But that's just because of the unknown. I had no idea what was in store. This time around, I am actually looking forward to it. I can't wait!

Good luck to you on deciding on what you want. I would just suggest making your OH happy as well. You don't want him being a nervous wreck on delivery day because he is scared of something going wrong. You want him to have faith in the people caring for you as well. Congrats on your BFP too!

 

[elliot]

Thanks for all the great info Daisy! I think what you described might me similar to what I would get if we go with an OBGYN... we'd mostly see the NP for our visits. And I'm taking the fact that you survived the 1st birth to look forward to a second as a very good sign that I can do this! So thanks for the confidence boost!

Talked to OH again last night, and he's still pretty uncomfortable with the idea of a midwife. We both know it's not accurate and please no one take offense, but he can't help thinking of midwife and immediately imagining all sorts of old-fashioned, unclean, horrible births like you seen in movies from medieval times!

I want him to be comfortable too, so I'm starting to lean toward OBGYN, but I told him in no uncertain terms that I'm afraid of a pushy OBGYN who won't let things happen and will just start interfering for fun, so it's going to be his job to fight off any overeager meddling doc!

We agreed that could work for both of us, but we're both wondering about doulas now. Do they only participate in the birth or could they also participate in the pregnancy and help us get a little more of the personal touch and attention we might lose by passing up on a midwife?

 

[LadyofRohan]

Thanks for all the great info Daisy! I think what you described might me similar to what I would get if we go with an OBGYN... we'd mostly see the NP for our visits. And I'm taking the fact that you survived the 1st birth to look forward to a second as a very good sign that I can do this! So thanks for the confidence boost!

Talked to OH again last night, and he's still pretty uncomfortable with the idea of a midwife. We both know it's not accurate and please no one take offense, but he can't help thinking of midwife and immediately imagining all sorts of old-fashioned, unclean, horrible births like you seen in movies from medieval times!

I want him to be comfortable too, so I'm starting to lean toward OBGYN, but I told him in no uncertain terms that I'm afraid of a pushy OBGYN who won't let things happen and will just start interfering for fun, so it's going to be his job to fight off any overeager meddling doc!

We agreed that could work for both of us, but we're both wondering about doulas now. Do they only participate in the birth or could they also participate in the pregnancy and help us get a little more of the personal touch and attention we might lose by passing up on a midwife?

If he's open to it, maybe you can visit your local midwifery centery or hospital that has certified midwives so he can rid himself of that uncomfortable stereotype. My midwifery center has an open house every month and DH and I went to it. They did a question and answer session and then we were allowed to see all the rooms, etc. It was very informative and they are very professional.

Doulas usually assist you in laboring at home as much as possible before you have to go in to the hospital. They can't really give you any medical advice or administer drugs or IVs, they are basically there to help you through the first stages of labor. I'm not sure what sort of 'personal touch' you are looking for?

 

[elliot]

If he's open to it, maybe you can visit your local midwifery centery or hospital that has certified midwives so he can rid himself of that uncomfortable stereotype. My midwifery center has an open house every month and DH and I went to it. They did a question and answer session and then we were allowed to see all the rooms, etc. It was very informative and they are very professional.

Doulas usually assist you in laboring at home as much as possible before you have to go in to the hospital. They can't really give you any medical advice or administer drugs or IVs, they are basically there to help you through the first stages of labor. I'm not sure what sort of 'personal touch' you are looking for?

Hi Lady of Rohan - thanks for the ideas. The midwives here actually work in the same facilities as the OBGYNs, so he's honestly not concerned about the facilities. It's just one of those things... like he knows it's not really logical, but he would just feel better having a doctor. My health and safety is his biggest concern about the whole PG and birth, so he says he'd just like to have whoever has the most training, most credentials, most high salary.... etc. even if it's not really necessary.

The personal touch I'd like is someone who'd be a little more available to us, able to spend a bit more time during our visits, less likely to want to pry the baby out with forceps when I haven't even had a chance to push yet, and perhaps be a bit less "cold." (Now here I go, with my own steroetypes, and again, I'm sorry if I give any offense, I've just had some bad experiences with doctors who seem to think I'm nothing more than a car in for a tire change).

I'm starting to think our best bet might be a very progressive-minded OBGYN.

Wishing everybody else a healthy and happy pregnancy and delivery! Thanks for all your great discussion, it's helped me think this through.