Would you let someone use your babies cot?

[Tess.ie]

It wouldn't bother me, but all my family live so far away so to be honest id sleep in a tent in the garden if it meant they would come and stay!! I also got lots of second hand things for LO, so it's not like she was the first user anyway.

However it does bother you, and that's ok we are all different and I'm sure you will sort something out with your brother.

 

[sue_88]

I would be the same OP.

My baby's things are brand new and will be used by her first, especially her nursery and he 'big girl' bed.

It's ok to feel that way

 

[Indi84]

Wouldn't bother me, tons of our stuff was second hand, cot included. Mattress was be though

 

[x__amour]

Wouldn't bother me.

 

[Peggy O]

Lily hasn't slept in her's yet either (played in it a few times) I wouldn't want somebody else in it...but that's just me. I see both sides.

You have the right to say no. Don't let him make you feel bad, especially if they go away elsewhere and use the other thing.

 

[Amour]

I can see where you are coming from, but to me my nephew is like my son. I don't look at him any less than my own child so I wouldn't have a problem.

If it was cause he's too big and might break it then we would have to work something else out, and I wouldn't expect my brother to get the hump if that was the case.

 

[amjon]

It wouldn't bother me.

 

[jessicatunnel]

Wouldn't bother me.

Also just wanted to point out that just because they use the travel cot a lot doesn't mean their child sleeps well in it. Those things are uncomfortable and if he sleeps better in a crib (cot) and there's one readily available where they're staying, I can understand why they would rather he sleep in it.

 

[Trishg21]

Wouldn't bother me at all

 

[d_b]

It would have bugged me for my first born.. In fact my SIL and her toddler visited when I was pregnant and had the crib set up and I was really worried she would ask to use the crib.. Luckily they are cosleepers, lol. But in hindsight I realize it's no big deal and I was overreacting.

 

[petite ping]

It wouldn't bother me at all. Having traveled with a baby and a travel cot, a good night's sleep would make all the difference between a grumpy kid and sweetheart. Unless your nephew is a total monster, your LO probably won't be able to tell that someone slept in their bed before them. In any case, you'll change the sheets and it's as good as new.

 

[Rachel_C]

It wouldn't bother me at all, but if it does bother you why not just put your LO in the cot for his nap today, take some pictures, leave him to sleep? Ta da! His first sleep in his first NEW cot. Now your nephew can sleep in there without being the first. You wouldn't need to switch to having LO sleep in there all the time.

 

[Amygdala]

To be honest, it would bother me and this is my second. The advice for minimising SIDS is to have a new mattress for each child, including between siblings. Part of the reason is that bacteria can grow and multiply on mattresses and then cause illness in a baby who has not previously been exposed (see here for example: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/16108799/). Now having another child sleep on the mattress will only be a minimal risk but I'd still not be happy with it, having spent money on a new mattress to keep baby as safe as possible.

But I think the real question here is this: Should your brother refuse to stay because you're not comfortable with their toddler using baby's crib? Surely their 2-year-old has slept in a travel cot before. I agree, they're not great but surely they could manage for a few days? We bring a thin extra mattress for ours (£10 from ikea) and it's fine! Or LO sleeps in bed with us. I'd never assume that either of my kids should get to use another child's equipment, family or not. If they offer then great but I'd never be annoyed if they didn't. After all, I wouldn't expect for my host to let me sleep in their bed either.

 

[felix555]

Thanks for the replies everyone. It's weird how you feel a certain way about things that don't really matter but I can't ignore that my gut feeling says no, that's my lo's new bed. Right or wrong.

I love my bro, it's not because I don't want them here and I'm a little angry that he's guilt tripped me. They go away a lot and the travel cot is constantly used, one more night won't hurt.

I think the reason I feel like I do is backed up by the fact I know they would have done the same. There is no way in the world anyone would have slept in their lo's nursery let alone cot before he did. I wouldn't of even asked so I thought they would understand.

So I'm sticking with my feeling, no arguments, it's not happening. It's important to me.

that's the thing you asked if people would mind and we can only apply it to our own personal circumstances and our relationships with our families and what we would and wouldn't allow.

as i said i would allow MY brother's baby to use it for reasons such as, he lives in another country and if he visited i would just be ecstatic that they are here i wouldn't even think about something like this being a problem. your family dynamic is completely different to mine or anyone else here that replied they would.

so don't feel bad at all about not wanting him to use it. at the end of the day it's your choice and yes it's nice for your baby to have new totally unused things. i totally get that part, it's a hangup I personally have I have never bought my LO anything second hand because I always want him to have new things.

don't feel bad.

 

[ktod]

I would feel exactly the same if my LO hadn't used it yet. I spent ages picking out things and setting up the nursery when I was pregnant. It was such an important project and there were so many hopes and dreams that went along with it.

Yes, I know that is ridiculously sentimental and I couldn't care less if someone else slept in his cot now but if you think back to life in third tri (i know the OP isnt preg) the smallest things were such a big deal. I laugh at the stuff I was fretting over. But it WAS important at that time and just cos I don't care about it now doesn't mean I should dismiss how I felt then.

 

[tigerlilly]

I'd be bothered! and if i was visiting anyone I wouldn't let lo sleep in their cot if it hadn't been used! I'd rather give up my bed for them. If it was me personally, and I was visiting I would put lo in with us or sleep on the floor with him on an air bed or sofa!

He's used to the travel cot so what's is the difference if he spends on extra night in it? I think it's selfish to cancel a visit because of this reason.

 

[MrsButterfly]

I wouldn't be worried about the safety aspect but if I had my lo's new nursery all set up and he hadn't used it yet I don't think I'd be happy about someone else's child going in the cot first.

I recognise its the kind of thing my DH wouldn't understand but I'd stand firm on it too like the op.

Also my little boy must be the exception as he sleeps amazingly in a travel cot but then I did get an extra mattress for it so it's super cosy now!

 

[Noo]

Surely at 2 the kid can sleep in a bed?!

 

[jd83]

It wouldn't bother me a bit, as its family, and it's just one night, not extended use of the mattress as far as SIDS concerns. Unless the kid was sick, then it would bother me.

I can totally see where its a total pain to travel with a toddler with a travel cot/play pen. They are uncomfy, and make for a crap night of sleep for everyone because it usually ends up with broken sleep for toddler, and in turn everyone else. Honestly, I'd rather co-sleep than use those when we travel. We get more sleep that way. And I'm not a co-sleeper in general.

 

[Seity]

Yes, as long as I knew it was someone who wouldn't trash it.