Would you let your 7 year old walk to school?

[Minstermind]

I know there's a couple other threads similar to this but this is a different take on the situation and looking for honest input.

My son is 7. We live in a town of about 50,000 people (so not a big city but not a small village). We live in a very residential area. The walk to school takes about 15 minutes. Half of it is purely residential areas. There is one road with a crosswalk (push button to make the traffic stop) and the rest is side roads to the school, where there is a lollipop lady (crossing guard) to get the kids across the road.

My neighbor has three children ages 5, 7, and 9. He has already started letting the 9 year old make his own way to and from school but he and I both share turns walking the other kids (his and my son) to and from school.

Next year he says he plans to let them all walk up and back themselves as the oldest, 9 years old, will be with them. I do not feel comfortable with this and I'm already planning to take up the morning and afternoon walks in order to ensure the safety of my son at least!

Both the neighbor dad and my husband feel it's ok when school starts next year, for the lot of them to walk up and back together, as they are in a group and there is a 9-year old among them. My husband cites examples of himself walking to and from school at age 6 (when he had his siblings with him).

They both think I disagree with it because I come from the states and have lived in a big city where fear, fear, fear is drilled into parents.

I would like some honest feedback from others just to see what the opinions are...would you let your 7 year old walk to and from school if in a group with other kids?

 

[Lillipop]

I have a 6 year old and a 8 year old and I wouldn't let them walk up with a group tbh or together even! I just wouldn't trust them! I really don't think my two are responsible enough tbf!
I cant see a 9 year old being able to take on the responsibility of ensuring they all get to school safely if I'm being honest!
I can see why your not comfortable with it!
I would just be forever paranoid they didn't get there or one of them would get run over or something
But hey thats just me
x

 

[special_kala]

I think it is to young. I didnt walk to school without my mum until i was 10 and then i was in secondary school at 11 and my brother took me.

You could let them walk but walk a few minutes behind so they have a bit of independance but you know their safe

 

[Minstermind]

Thank you for your input Lillipop and special_kala. I'm really being told that it's all in my head and even being told anyone on here who thinks it's not ok is also in the same mindset as me, driven by fear-based mentality, lol... I really don't think so! I am trusting my gut instincts as a mother and being told it's not that, it's conditioning of fear in society.

Either way I will do the school runs by myself if need be. I hardly feel comfortable with a group of small kids going up to the school. I just don't really don't feel it's appropriate. For traffic reasons, for safety reasons, etc.. sometimes two or more of them can get into an argument with eachother and god knows if one would end pushing at another one on the sidewalk next to the road and push one out by accident into the road, ya know?

Again, I'm being told these what if scenarios are ridiculous and it's just me being an overly protective mom. It really irritates me!

 

[loz]

my daughter is 6 but i cannot imagine her walking to school at 7,8,9 or even 10 tbh and its only a 5 min walk through a park, just cannot trust anyone these days, i would be worried sick

 

[xCorkettex]

I would think of it this way-if one of the children got knocked down by a car (heaven forbid) would the person in charge (in this case the 9YO) be able to sensibly and reliably deal with the situation?
I very much doubt a 9 year old knows first aid, be in control enough not to panic and be able to ring an ambulance/deal with the driver etc.......so my answer would be a definite no.
I also don't believe in letting your children look after your other children, they didn't have them so why should they??? plus such responsibility should be left to an adult.
I would say secondary school age is a good time to let a child start walking to school alone-but not with younger siblings, they still need an adult.

 

[morri]

Where I live every kid walks to school unless it lives too far away, then either the parents bring it by car or they get there with a school bus which stops not far from the school.

 

[Cariad_bach]

I wouldnt hun,
They're too young IMO, what if something happened etc etc.

Im dreading it happening, i share waking mine and the neighbours LO's to the school bus stop.
She has a 9 year old girl and a 7 year old, she does mornings and i fetch them back, it wont be long before she decides her are old enough to go up by themselves (its only 5 mins) so i will have to walk mine both ways and i suppose i will be keeping a eye on hers too!

 

[MrsB80]

I wouldn't allow it either I'm afraid, so I see where you are coming from.
Especially if there was an accident or a problem could they really expect a 9 year old to deal with the situation? Far to young imo.
x

 

[amazed]

I have an 8 yr old who has been asking to walk to school on his own for a good year but i wont allow it... he will be moving school in september and will be 2 mins away from the house but i still wont allow it lol... im to much of a worrier.

 

[hypnorm]

Too young sorry, even in residential areas its amazing that people don't hear or see incidents happening right outside their door.
i would have said more near the age of 11+

 

[faun]

Does the school have any rules about this as at my childrens school they are not allowed to walk to and from school on there own until they are in year 6 we also have to sign a form giving permission for the child to do this. Personally i think under 10 is too young to be trusted to walk to school unaccompanied.

 

[anothersquish]

I wouldnt allow it. I think once they reach 9/10 fair enough but I wouldnt rely on a 9yr old to look after 5/6/7yr olds on a 15 minute walk involving road crossing etc. Im all for children having independence and responsibility but think its a little too much too soon for one 9yr old to be expected to 'manage' three younger children.

 

[Minstermind]

Thank you Loz, xCorkettex, Morri, Cariad_bach, MrsB80, Amazed, Hypnorm, Faun, and Anothersquish. I appreciate you taking the time to reply and it helps me immensely in not feeling alone in my instincts here about this situation!!

xCorkettex, MrsB80 and Anothersquish, that is a great point regarding emergencies. I too don't feel a 9/10 year old may be fully equipped to handle an emergency situation like that and it's among my main concerns. I can understand that around that age he is well capable to walk his own self to school and back if that's what the neighbor dad wants, but I certainly wouldn't want him in charge of the others, at least not my son! They play together after all and are buddies..even from a dynamics point of view I wouldn't want to place the older one as some kind of boss or guardian over my son.

Morri, I do understand what you are saying. I think in many ways it can be a cultural thing and what is considered normal and what everyone else is doing, etc etc.. I can see how it would be more accepted there as everyone is doing that unless they live far away. Here it's not so much the case though you do see the odd younger kid walking up on his own.

Cariad_bach, I totally relate to what you're saying. Because of mine (and your) neighbor deciding to stop the walk sharing soon enough, it leaves us with the full duties, lol...it's ok with me though, as I was doing that the first year before they moved in anyway. It's just an adjustment all over again, lol.. Like you I think I will end keeping my eyes open for his kids too if they happen to be in eyesight during the walk.

Faun, you've brought up an excellent point about the school policy. I hadn't thought to ask about that and I think I definitely will! It would be ideal if I could persuade the neighbor not to let his kids out like that for their safety, but in the end, I can't force him and all that.

Hypnorm, I agree..residential areas, I think, can sometimes give a false sense of safety as it is quieter, but there is still the odd driver out there who is careless and goes speeding through the areas or aren't looking properly, etc..

Again, thank you for taking the time to reply. It helps me in my ''ammunition'' with my husband and the neighbor, lol...it's not just me being an overprotective mom!

 

[VampMum1980]

my 10 yr old and 7 yr old walk home from school alone but i never let them walk to school on their own yet, they ask me i say no coz i rather see them go thru them gates and know they are safe, coz if they never got to school how would i know??

 

[mandy81]

I have a 7 year old daughter and there is on way I would let her walk to school or home by herself (her school is about 10 mins away) I would never be able to settle if I didn't know she had got into school safe.

I think 7 is a little young tbh x

 

[Minstermind]

VampMum1980, that's very true. Even if I were to let him walk to school at this age (which I'm not!) I'd be concerned about knowing for sure that he got to school altogether, whereas as you pointed out, walking home is a way of ensuring your child gets to their destination safely. WHEN the time does come in the future for me to start allowing him some more independence in that area, I think I would do the same. Starting off with letting him walk ahead on part of the way home to start getting used to it.

Mandy81, I agree...it just doesn't sit right in my bones to think of him on his own navigating traffic and all. He just seems way too young to even consider it!

I'm glad to get all this feedback from you ladies as between the neighbor and my husband, I was beginning to question myself a little, wondering if I really do have some kind of paranoid overprotective issue, lol (that would NOT have meant I let him walk anyway mind you! lol...just was questioning my own thoughts on it).

Thank you again! I'm definitely not going to let him walk on his own or in the group, that's for sure. I'll take up the morning and afternoon walk and my neighbor can make his own decisions. I can't make him change his mind, I can only point out what I think about it and the fact that my son will not be included in that.

 

[Jkelmum]

Does the school have any rules about this as at my childrens school they are not allowed to walk to and from school on there own until they are in year 6 we also have to sign a form giving permission for the child to do this. Personally i think under 10 is too young to be trusted to walk to school unaccompanied.

In our school its yr 3 and katie has walked since the start of that and she would of been 7 and 6months ..she walks with her friend is very mature and the only road she crosses is the one at school where there is a lollypop lady ...takes her 5mins ..I would say depends on the child and the distance ...I dont think i would of been happy with a 15 walk x

 

[Pyrrhic]

No, I wouldn't allow it.

Here they have a walking bus though where there is about 10 kids, and 2 parents at a time take turns to walk the group to school.

 

[mommyof3co]

I would not be ok with it. We live in a pretty small area, the neighborhood is quite safe and the school is in the neighborhood but you do have to cross the busiest street in the neighborhood though it's not terribly busy. My 6yr old walked home from school last week, without my permission and I about died. I was so pissed, was in contact with the bus depot and the school and got it all cleared up, this will NOT happen again. But I don't feel safe at all with him walking to and from school...he'll turn 7 in April. He is smart and knows how to do it but it's not his actions I'm worried about, it's everyone else that has access to him during that time, he's still too young imo