Wtt Feb 2020

Discussion in 'Waiting To Try' started by lisaalove, Nov 23, 2019.

  1. lisaalove

    lisaalove Momof2boys

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    It's weird to think I'm back in this thread, I didn't ever plan on being here again and honestly I'm not even sure if this is where I belong yet. I will always want a third child but after loosing my twins at what I thought was 9w2d and was really 7w2d... I'm almost afraid of trying again so for now I'll stay in this group and say were waiting, I want to give myself at least two months to grieve and have a clear idea of if I can mentally try again without it affecting me too much. We had one mmc as well in 2011 but we never saw the heartbeat and it didn't affect me as much.
    We currently have two wonderful boys at home who are 9 and 4 and the last week or so since we found out we lost the twins my 9 year old keeps telling me he loves me and never wants to see me this sad again. He is such a sweet and empathetic kid and I don't ever want him to have to see me like this again. Hence the confusion, but I also know the feeling for another child will never go away. I've imagined three kids my entire life. So for now I suppose were waiting until February.
     
  2. Bevziibubble

    Bevziibubble Well-Known Member
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    I'm so sorry for your loss :hugs::hugs:

    Aww, your 9 year old sounds so empathetic and caring <3
     
  3. lisaalove

    lisaalove Momof2boys

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    He really is! And thank you.
     
  4. lisaalove

    lisaalove Momof2boys

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    Obviously I know waiting is what my body needs right now but it's weird. I expected to not want to try again. For the first week and a half after I found out I thought I didn't want to keep trying, yet for some reason now all I can do is think about trying again. I'm trying to take it one day at a time and I'm sure once winter break rolls around time will feel like its going by a little faster but right now and well for the last two and a half weeks it feels like everything is standing still.
     
  5. Bevziibubble

    Bevziibubble Well-Known Member
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    Thinking of you :hugs:
     
  6. lisaalove

    lisaalove Momof2boys

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    Waiting, if there is one thing I hate it is waiting.... I am not a patient person especially when its something I know I want. I've been waiting since my youngest was born. Almost 5 years, I hate waiting. I have known for as long as I can remember that I was supposed to have three children. I am so tired of waiting... I am still bleeding from the surgery but I am hoping my body will return to normal soon enough and my cycles will start up again. I want this, I just stood staring at the baby stuff in target today. Part of me wanted to break down and cry. The other part of me wanted to buy everything in sight. Why is this so hard, I still remember my mother trying with all her might to have her last, with all of her fertility issues. Part of me is terrified that will be me, especially after I had this last mmc.
     
  7. Bevziibubble

    Bevziibubble Well-Known Member
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  8. lisaalove

    lisaalove Momof2boys

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    I think I'm gonna ovulate any day now and I hate that I'm waiting and I'm going to watch this ovulation period go by. if I'm being positive I cant even try or dtd cause I haven't been cleared which makes it a little easier to wait. But stilllllll I'm so impatient!
     
  9. Bevziibubble

    Bevziibubble Well-Known Member
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  10. lisaalove

    lisaalove Momof2boys

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    I had my appointment today and my OB gave me the all clear to have fun again but no trying until Jan 22 so waiting until February to start ttc again. I'm 1dpo today and waiting to see how/if my cycles return to my normal 28/29 day. I'll still be tracking ovulation until we try but from my previous tracking and the ovulation tracking from the other day says I should ovulate the first week of February. Hoping someone will join me in the wait!
     
  11. Bevziibubble

    Bevziibubble Well-Known Member
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    Best of luck for February :)
     
  12. lisaalove

    lisaalove Momof2boys

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    Thanks it's been nice to have you going through all this with me :hug:
     
  13. Bevziibubble

    Bevziibubble Well-Known Member
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