WTT for 2nd child - silly concerns!

[Padan1111]

Hi All

My lovely DD is 2 in a week! Hubby and I have discussed siblings and want to WTT until beginning 2016. This will allow for DD to turn 3 before a sibling arrives so we can afford childcare! She's at nursery 3 days a week and I don't want to disrupt that.

So this is all great, but I am in a panic (already!) about secondary infertility. I have no reason to be at all, no indications that it will be an issue for us. I just feel silly, but I can't help thinking that number 2 will be harder than 1 to conceive. With DD I was pregnant pretty quick after coming of BCP. But back then I was much more fit, lighter (!) and well rested and we had lots of energy for making babies!

I do feel stupid for feeling like this, especially 6 months before we even want to start trying. But part of me wants to get started now so that we have more time. It doesn't help that my SIL and one of my baby friends is currently pregnant so I'm also feeling broody.

I don't really know why I'm posting, just good to get it off my chest I suppose!

 

[lisa1980]

I think it's natural to worry but I'm sure you'll be fine. There's no reason to suspect you'll have difficulty.

I fell quicker the second time than the first but I still spent ages before we were ttc worrying about it!

 

[Girly922]

Happy birthday to your DD for next week.

Part of our reasons for WTT are childcare too. DD is in nursery 2 days a week so once she turns 3, almost all her childcare will be paid for. I also want to keep her in nursery those 2 days when I go off on maternity leave. Fortunately I get maternity pay for six months before it drops to SMP so we can afford to try a little sooner.

I am scared of ttc though. I've now had 3 pregnancies, and only one baby (well toddler now). Although I get pregnant fairly easily, I'm worried that there are other issues.

If you're really worried, why not start ntnp a few months before you plan to ttc?

 

[wtbmummy]

Honestly.... I could have written that myself!! Except ds is only 15mo. We originally said we wanted a 3year gap but we have decided we do not want another winter baby so ds will be between 2.5mo and 2.9mo (hopefully)

When I say I could have written this myself it is because I too have this fear that we will be ttc for a long time this time round. With ds we fell first time unprotected and I keep thinking what if that doesnt happen again, what if we try for months and months and something is wrong with me this time round. So I think after reading this maybe we do have a normal fear.

I wont be going back to work after no.2 but ds currently goes to nursery and I will be moving him to preschool after his 2nd birthday. I will still send him in to preschool but will most likely reduce his hours (as wont be able to afford 3full days when on smp) It will hopefully give me a chance to bond with baby 2 and catch up with sleep where possible

We were originally going to ttc from Sep but have brought it forward to July as I am worried about it taking longer and we are also going to attempt gender swaying

 

[Padan1111]

Thanks for your replies ladies. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way. I've read a couple of articles recently in the news about SI and I suppose that's why it's on my mind. Hopefully by the time we get to TTC I will have chilled out a bit!

I don't like waiting, it gives me too much time to worry! I like to make a decision and go with it immediately. Even restaurants and ordering food. If I order quickly, fine, but if I have to wait I change my mind several times and always doubt myself afterwards!!

Haha, comparing having a baby to ordering food off a menu

We could start sooner as DD is 3 in May 2016, but it would be difficult to cover childcare with my maternity pay (which is statuary only). Since she won't be eligible for free hours until the 1st September.

wtbmummy - how do you gender sway?

 

[Girly922]

I'm very tempted to try gender swaying too but I hear it's more difficult to sway for a boy than for a girl?

 

[wtbmummy]

We will be trying to gender sway for a girl. (As would be nice to have one of each but if we have a boy we will still be happy)
There is quite a lot invovled actually for a girl. Taking magnesium, trying to have a diet that makes your body more acidic (male sperm die in that enviorment apprently) and you have to dtd before O and NOT on O or after. With ds we dtd day after O and knew we were pregnant straight away. (My other concern is the tww, with ds I knew at the moment dtd was done and so did dh, what if I dont this time?)

As for gender swaying for a boy girly922 you dtd day before day of and day after O as male sperm swim quicker and live less so the egg needs to basically already be there female sperm live longer and (like women) can survive harsh enviorments and are more patient

 

[Girly922]

From what I've read, we both need a potassium rich diet, and a low acidic diet to help sway for a boy. That plus dtd on O day, and the day after. We only BD'd the 3 days before O when we conceived DD as OH works away.
The only part of that that I might struggle with is dtd on ovulation as I don't temp. I've tried but I've got a brain like a sieve and just can't seem to temp at the same time every day. I will be using OPKs, but I occasionally get a LH surge, don't ovulate, and have another surge a couple of days later when I do ovulate. Which would be more likely to produce a girl. Not that I'd mind, I'd love another girl.

I've started taking my prenatals and vitamin b complex from today. I took these when we conceived DD, and conceived her the first cycle I started B complex. I was also taking EPO up until OV, which I've heard can help sway for a girl too. I'm not planning on taking that this time unless I need it.