35 and TTC #1-anyone else?

[KatO79]

Hello everyone:wave:

I've been married for almost 5 years to my DH and we're currently TTC #1. I unfortunately had a Chemical in the end of April and the previous month AF came right on time We've been trying for 8 months since I stopped taking p-pills (had been on them since I was almost 25).

I'm currently on CD9 (O either CD13 or 14) for anyone who's curious. I was previously using ovulation tests (Wondfo), temping and the CBFM but am currently taking a break and hoping I'll be lessed stress and conceive quicker

I'd love to find some TTC buddies, preferably others around my age who are also TTCing #1 and can understand the struggles that go with being in your mid-30's and TTCing your first child.

 

[Jannah K]

Hi kat,

I am 32 and have been ttc 8mos...stopped using any tests, temping etc myself since last cycle to ease of stress. I am ttc#1 and been married around 3years....
Both side of families got kids so feeling very lonely....
Good luck with ttc...

 

[KatO79]

Hi kat,

I am 32 and have been ttc 8mos...stopped using any tests, temping etc myself since last cycle to ease of stress. I am ttc#1 and been married around 3years....
Both side of families got kids so feeling very lonely....
Good luck with ttc...

Yeah I know how that feels. My big brother has 1 child and my big sister has 2 kids and on my husband's side his older brother has 2 kids while the younger brother isn't anywhere near ready and is currently living with his girlfriend. So it's been a bit lonely. All hubby's friends who have kids are constantly asking us when we're having one and don't we want kids It's kinda upsetting since I don't want to discuss our issues with them since they all had a pretty easy time of getting their and probably wouldn't understand

Good luck to you too

 

[Jannah K]

Hru. Doing kat?
I feel like I will o in next few days..oh wanted to go on road trip with my in laws but I refused as I dunt wanna miss out on window...I m not using opk...i am cd15today so we will start bd today....
What's going with you?

 

[KatO79]

Hru. Doing kat?
I feel like I will o in next few days..oh wanted to go on road trip with my in laws but I refused as I dunt wanna miss out on window...I m not using opk...i am cd15today so we will start bd today....
What's going with you?

Yeah I know how that is, I start getting nervous if I think something is going to "interfere" with my ttc'ing Luckily I'm either ovulating today (which is CD13) or at the latest tomorrow and I think we're getting in enough tries that I feel comfortable about things Haven't been using OPK's as planned even though I do have some lying around Our only planned BD'ing was yesterday and today although we might give it one last try tomorrow, especially if my cm hasn't dried up and is still watery. Otherwise we might try anyway.

The only "setback" is we're going to DH's nephew's 9th birthday tomorrow but I'm sure we can reach another try in there if we decide to do so either in the morning or when we get back since I don't think it'll last longer than til 7-8 PM, tops and it starts 1 PM.

The only things I've been using are softcups (reusable kind) and a little preseed (mostly putting it in the cup before putting it in so we have happier ). I first used my softcup last night since I wanted to practice a little before using it after BD'ing and I first got them 2-3 days ago in the mail (they don't sell them in DK). I was a bit chicken and first put it in after about 30 min of lying on my back so if I messed up, at least most of the good got in there Although BD'ing was a bit less enjoyable since my nipples were really painful, more so than normal around O time

 

[Jannah K]

Looks like u r in good shape....
How long is your cycle? I have irregular cycles...my dr prescribed me clomid for 3mos which helped with o and also in terms of timing but was little stressful in terms. Of bd....I still didn't get preggo...other cycles 5cycles have been natural....I dunt opk so dunno when I o....I might have to continue bd another week and it is difficult to get oh on same page....
I hope bday went well....n u got to bd...
Happy 2week wait....

 

[KatO79]

Looks like u r in good shape....
How long is your cycle? I have irregular cycles...my dr prescribed me clomid for 3mos which helped with o and also in terms of timing but was little stressful in terms. Of bd....I still didn't get preggo...other cycles 5cycles have been natural....I dunt opk so dunno when I o....I might have to continue bd another week and it is difficult to get oh on same page....
I hope bday went well....n u got to bd...
Happy 2week wait....

My cycles are normally 27-28 days If you want to try and figure out O day naturally, you could monitor your cm. That's what I do So as soon as you see watery or EW cm, then you should start bd'ing. I only get the watery type with small patches og EW mixed in. I've tried lots of Things to get EW cm but nothing has worked so I'm just practicing acceptance You could also try monitoring your cp (high or low, soft or hard) and how much your os is open. I've tried this method but have diificulties telling if my os is open or not so I go by cm and sometimes check my cp. I don't find it very stressful so despite being regular, I check cm.

My dh can be a bit diificult as well, don't think he likes to plan bd'ing and just feels it should be when we're in the mood. Maybe your oh also feels this way? I can kind of understand them and I would go for the "Let's just bd when we feel like it and see what happens" plan if I was in my mid or even late 20's but being 35 don't feel like we have the time for that Maybe you guys could also take a break and not plan bd so much and just try to bd during a few of the days you notice fertile cm? Maybe you could just let him know and take Things from there. Try letting him "plan" things maybe, I've let dh pretty much have free rein this month (other than CD 12 and 13) and it's kept me relaxed.

The bday went well and we managed to get him something no one else already bought The only bad thing is that he's a bit of a spoiled brat and never thanks people for gifts We did bd but my cm had dried up so I don't think it'll help much but it can't hurt Things either

Thanks I'm 3 dpo right now so here's hoping Will be going to the gp with dh tomorrow to discuss things and see if he thinks we need to be tested and be considered for assisted conception. I'll let you know what he says

How far into your cycle are you, do you think?

 

[Jannah K]

Hey kat
I believe I m cd17..do feel wet cm since yday...we did bd today am and day before yday...will try to squeeze one more day n than I guess wait ..thanks for suggestions...
It gets difficult with babies around.....
Gluck with appt

 

[Jannah K]

Other msg was in hurry as was at in laws...
Yes oh says to me it will happen when it's right time..right chemistry etc and I dunt need to plan it so much and also their is nothing wrong with us...it has only been 7months....I think last month he was surprised to see period showed up again...he never talks about kids..but lately I see him playing with kids so it makes me feel more low of the bfn....
People who got married after me in my extended family have 1child And on their second....so I feel pretty left out...oh doesn't feel it as his brothers just got married so he is not he only one with no kids...
Let me know how appt go..at least your oh is willing to see a doc...mine isn't ready!

 

[Jannah K]

Hru kat??

 

[KatO79]

Sorry for the long wait, had internet troubles yesterday so couldn't log on

Our doctor says we are definitely candidates to be referred to a fertility Clinic. He feel after we've tried for 8 months then it most likely won't happen naturally but feels we should keep trying until we start at the fertility Clinic.

So hubby is getting tested tomorrow and it'll take 8 days to get the results. Think our doctor thinks it might be dh's fault since I've never had an STD or infection (that I know of, only been with dh and 1 other guy 1 time before him that would have said something if he had an std) so it may be dh's sperm. I'm almost hoping it is his fault because my mil has been practically blaming me, always asking if I'm eating healthy and the like After we get the results, the doctor will refer us and I'll most likely get tested as well. Then we'll see, maybe they'll suggest ivf or something

Yeah since you're 32, you might need to try 4 months more before your gp will Refer you. But I'd suggest that you also go in to your gp in 4-5 months since you risk waisting months trying when there could be something wrong with you or oh

It's not fun seeing people married after you have kids. I've had some of dh friends keep asking when it'll happen since we've been married for 5 years tomorrow and have been trying for 8 months (waiting to see result for month #9) One of them has a 1 year old and last time we saw her, she asked me "don't you want one of these?" and I got upset and didn't say anything. That was actually the month I had my chemical I just wish people with kids would just leave us alone, for all they know maybe there is a sad reason for some couples not having kids yet, maybe they've been trying for a long time and it just isn't happening

Sounds like you're doing what you can. Here's hoping it's our Lucky month

 

[KatO79]

Well the witch got me today So here's hoping cycle 10 will be better. I've opened a rant thread: https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/t...6827-ttcing-frustrations-anyone-can-help.html

I'm just going to stop having BD planned and let nature just take it's course. Maybe that'll help until our GP refers us to a fertility clinic after he's done testing us

How are things going with you?

 

[Jannah K]

Hi kat
Hang in there...it is frustrating n clock ticking but the more relaxed you are the more things will go your way....I hope this is your cycle
Let me know what doc says...my oh has appt with gp in two weeks if no bfp for me, I will at least get prescription for SA lab work for him....n than worry about my tests in August after my birthday....

 

[KatO79]

Hi kat
Hang in there...it is frustrating n clock ticking but the more relaxed you are the more things will go your way....I hope this is your cycle
Let me know what doc says...my oh has appt with gp in two weeks if no bfp for me, I will at least get prescription for SA lab work for him....n than worry about my tests in August after my birthday....

Yeah it's very frustrating, especially when I didn't think it'd take more than 3-4 months, 6 months max and here I am on cycle #10 We're not even planning any of our BDing this time and just going to go with the flow until we start any treatments We're expecting his results this week so here's hoping

Let's hope this is you're cycle too and that your OHs are looking good But you couldn't get an appointment for him before that, my DH got tested before we knew if it was a BFN or BFP for cycle 9 because we felt it couldn't hurt. But wow you already know you'll get tested in August, our GP hasn't mentioned anything about me yet but maybe it's because he suspects my DH is the problem

 

[Jannah K]

Hi. Kat
Instead of august I got all my testing done last Friday & today...everything is looking ok..now waiting for DH SA....will try till august before considering iui
What's going on with u?

 

[Baby Steps]

Hi all,

I'm 35 & TTC #1. We've been trying for about 8 months on and off and just discovered fertility friend to try and get a bit more accurate about it.

I try and play it cool and say all the right things BUT when we've tried I can't help imagining tell my hubby & family I'm pregnant, looking for when baby would be due etc. which all drives me slightly mad!

I'm hopeful that monitoring my cycle more closely will help improve our chances now

 

[KatO79]

Hi. Kat
Instead of august I got all my testing done last Friday & today...everything is looking ok..now waiting for DH SA....will try till august before considering iui
What's going on with u?

Nothing much, I'm at 2 dpo into cycle #10 so waiting to see if I'm pregnant or not. We just got DH's SA results and they're normal so I'm starting to think maybe I'm the problem or we've just had really lowsy timing for 8 months DH is going to have to give the lab another sample, don't know why when he's normal No word from our GP when he'll get me tested which is a bit weird

Until we find out DH and I are just going to relax and have fun, hoping we'll get our before we need to go through assisted conception. Would love to know which type will be recommended

Baby Steps: Welcome, it looks like we have a similar background I used to temp but found it stressful so I stopped. I'm very regular so I didn't get much out of it other than to confirm I'm Oing which is good to know I used to drive myself crazy with the same things but now I'm just assuming each month I'm not pregnant so each time AF shows up, I get less upset Hope you get more out of temping than I did