# Can you tell?



## misspriss

I was a church the other day, a new one. A woman (who had a cute, really chubby baby) asked me how old LO was. I told her he was 9 and a half months, and she said "He was a preemie, wasn't he?" And of course I said "yes, 6 weeks". Turns out her oldest daughter was a 27 week preemie, so perhaps she recognized something? I don't know.

To me, he looks like a normal 9 month old baby that is really skinny. Technically (I know because his ped office does it) he fits on the normal CDC growth chart for his actual age, albeit just barely (except his big head!).

But I wondered, are there features that distinguish a skinny baby from a preemie to someone who has seen them before? I tried to google, but it wasn't too successful. I saw someone said it was super big eyes and really chubby cheeks (like not a whole chubby head, just cheeks). People have always commented on LO's "giant eyes" but I never thought it was a "preemie thing".

Her baby, super chubby, was 4.5 months, and probably weighed more than DS.

Anyway, did she just guess lucky? Was it maybe because she had a preemie herself? Or is there something obvious we miss because they are our children?...or am I totally crazy?


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## JJKCB

no one has ever said anything about my son but he is a late preemie (he has an odd scar on his face that he was born with that is odd and no one can figure out why exactly although they say it might be a late closure of the skin but thats probs nothing to do with being preemie)


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## kirstybumx3

Honestly, a lot of the time I can tell. I don't know what it is exactly. But I can. Weird i know. It's only been since I had my son 8 weeks prem. maybe there are distinguishing features x


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## rbourre

A nurse told me she can always spot preemies for their first 2 year. She said it's their foreheads. I don't get it, to me my daughter looks the same as every other 1 year old just a bit smaller.


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## deafgal

Maybe it's the personality?


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## misspriss

I thought it might be his development for his small size? Being so petite at almost 10 months compared to her 4 month old?

Who knows, I wasn't bothered I just wondered.


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## sunnylove

I don't know, maybe. My brother-in-law was born 10 weeks premature and apparently you could REALLY tell he was a prem when he was a baby. He had a HUGE head, huge eyes and a tiny body. To this day he is 18 and looks like he's 14 (but I think it has to do with a hormone imbalance unrelated to his prematurity). But my son was born even earlier, 14 weeks premature, and I really don't think you can "tell" he was premature at all! Of course, only if I told someone he was 7 months actual age because most 7 month olds aren't only 12 pounds.  But other than that? My LO looks perfectly "normal." I think it depends on the baby, and think it was kind of rude that lady commented that your son was prem when she really didn't know.


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## AP

Its generally their heads and their eyes can tend to be big. Not all preemies have the same distinguishing features, but in our case Alex had the huge forehead. She has a long head, there is actually a name for it. I once got a report from the neonatologist from outpatients and the word was there, I had never heard of it until I googled!


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## misspriss

Oh she didn't do it in a rude way at all, I know it's hard to convey tone over the internet but there was nothing rude or presumptuous about it. She was very sweet. I think perhaps she knows what it is like to be a preemie mom, to look at other term babies and wonder if your baby is on track, or how they will turn out when they grow up. I think she was trying to be nice and supportive and let me know she had been there, and her daughter was happy and healthy (she was probably around 12-13). Not rude at all, I promise!


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## AP

i don't think it's rude either, there's nothing "wrong" with how they look ykwim


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## jandksmommy

The majority of preemies (especially really early preemies) have a slightly different 'look' but unless someone has experience with preemies, people don't seem to notice. Our little one had a very long narrow head and big forehead, a definite preemie look. Their soft little skulls had to lay against hard surfaces at a time when they should still have been floating in fluid. It results in a different head shape, less round. Until about a year old, medical professionals immediately recognized her as a preemie but everyone else just assumed she was a lot younger than she was or just figured she inherited a super long forehead. Thankfully, they loss the preemie 'look'. :)


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## sunnylove

Our LO had a flat head on both sides when he was in the NICU. The staff saw this taking shape and tried to put him on his back as often as possible (so give the sides of his head a rest) but he hated laying on his back and he would desat more often like that. It wasn't until he got a bit older and could handle laying on his back that his head started to take a more round shape and now he doesn't have flat sides at all! :) He does have a big forehead though. :p


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## GettingBroody

My mum is a dr and spent a lot of time with prems over the years. She said a lot of them (but not all obviously) have a distinctive long and narrow head shape...


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## sbl

I think you can tell more with very early preemies rather than later preterm babies.
I don't think anyone would guess my lo was 5 weeks early.


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## misspriss

My baby (The OP) was only 6 weeks early. His head is nice, but not as round as full term babies I see, so that may be it. It may be a combination of the slimmer head, big eyes, etc.


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## sbl

How has your son done with gaining weight?
My lo never had issues with gaining weight is on a par with other toddlers her actual age for everything really.
She's never really seemed preemie to anyone not in the know.
I'd have to tell people usually.


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## misspriss

He is small, but not off the charts even at actual age. And my ped uses the CDC charts, when the WHO charts would be more appropriate for EBF babies. But is petite.


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## sbl

I thought all ped's were obligated to use who charts no?


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## misspriss

Recommended, but not required.

I never ask, but when I look him up on the WHO charts, he is higher than on the printout from the doctor.


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## sbl

It must be different in Europe as ped's only use who charts here.
What's his birth weight and current weight?


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## misspriss

sbl said:


> It must be different in Europe as ped's only use who charts here.
> What's his birth weight and current weight?

Well, the CDC is purely an American thing.

The CDC measured average growth of American babies. It's the US average, essentially. Based off mostly formula fed babies.

The WHO measured growth of lots of different babies, and they picked babies in "optimum" growth conditions/pattersn. The WHO charts are the "gold standard" for optimal baby grown (as far as we have, anyway). They are based off mostly breastfed children.

So it was recommended for a while to put BF babies on the WHO charts, and FF babies on the CDC charts, because they would be more accurate. Breastfed babies grow at different rates than FF babies.

But anyway, I think most ped offices still use the CDC charts. I go home and plot him on the WHO charts myself.

His birth weight was 3lb15 and he's now 15lb+, but I'm not that worried about his growth or anything. I just wondered if there was anything in particular that made preemies stand out. His ped is perfectly happy with his growth, even plotting it at his actual age (not adjusted) on the CDC charts (WHO would be more appropriate).


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## sbl

It baffles me then why they use cdc charts when who charts are more accurate all round.


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## misspriss

sbl said:


> It baffles me then why they use cdc charts when who charts are more accurate all round.

The CDC charts came out first, the CDC charts reflect average Americans, the WIC offices and other government agencies use CDC charts, they use CDC charts for children over 24 months....it's just easier than switching the babies over at 2 and explaining the difference I guess.


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## minties

I've only observed from photos, but to me early prem babies have wide-set eyes that are quite 'googley'. I can't think of a better word. They definetely have something about the eye and forhead that is quite distinctive. I hope this doesn't sound offensive as I think it's actually quite appealing as a look.


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