# Songs That Help Me Make It Through



## Jessa

*SONG #1*
I'm the type of person that gets a lot of strength from music in hard times. This song has been posted on the forum before, but I thought it was worth bringing up near the top again.

It's called "I Would Die For That" by Kellie Coffey. I've never heard of her other than this song, but it's quite powerful and says exactly what I feel right now.

This section specifically:
_"Sometimes it's hard to conceive
With all that I've got, 
And all I've achieved,
What I want most before my time is gone
Is to hear the words, "I love you, Mom"."_

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqfGqOx2iDQ

*SONG #2*
The second song is called "My Name" by George Canyon. I first heard this song about five years ago and thought it was really good then. I never believed then that at some point in my life I would be listening to it relating to the words that he's singing. He apparently wrote this song for friends who experienced a stillbirth.

This section specifically:
_"Heaven knows no fear, no pain
I never got to set my wheels in motion
They loved me just the same
And they didn't even know my name
Didnt even know my name
You loved me just the same
And you didnt even know my name"_

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ff5qJrPT7k

*SONG #3*
This is Mariah Carey's "Hero". I was watching American Idol last night and one of the contestants who had lost his wife to cancer sang this song and commented that it helped to get him through the tough times. It struck a chord with me, feeling as though right now I'm in the middle of one of life's tough times and need some strength to get through it. We are all "heroes" according to Mariah. Don't forget that just because we're going through this trying time in our lives that there is light on the other side of the tunnel.

This section specifically:
_"Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time
You'll find the way
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you"_

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWlS8Oerx8o


----------



## rainbowzebra2

Hi,

Great post, This might be wayyyyyyy off topic for some people and it might just be my hormones after all thats happened but I was watching the film Atonement (with Keira knightly) yesterday and theres a bit where all the soldiers are on the beach in Dunkirk waiting to get the boats home to England during the 2nd world war. 

Anyhow, there is a scene where the Soldiers are singing a hymn that made me cry and I just loved the sentiment in it - it talks about a still small voice of calm which made me think. I googled the words and found solace in them. maybe they might help someone else. The clip is def worth a view - bear with the first few seconds - its a bit dark.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6tYtWYWgGo

The words to the hymn are:
Dear Lord and Father of mankind, 
Forgive our foolish ways! 
Reclothe us in our rightful mind, 
In purer lives Thy service find, 
In deeper reverence, praise. 



In simple trust like theirs who heard 
Beside the Syrian sea 
The gracious calling of the Lord, 
Let us, like them, without a word 
Rise up and follow Thee. 



O Sabbath rest by Galilee! 
O calm of hills above, 
Where Jesus knelt to share with Thee 
The silence of eternity 
Interpreted by love! 



With that deep hush subduing all 
Our words and works that drown 
The tender whisper of Thy call, 
As noiseless let Thy blessing fall 
As fell Thy manna down. 



Drop Thy still dews of quietness, 
Till all our strivings cease; 
Take from our souls the strain and stress, 
And let our ordered lives confess 
The beauty of Thy peace. 



Breathe through the heats of our desire 
Thy coolness and Thy balm; 
Let sense be dumb, let flesh retire; 
Speak through the earthquake, wind, and fire, 
O still, small voice of calm!


----------



## Jessa

Hi rainbow, that's also a really nice video. Music can be so comforting in times like this, eh?


----------



## jen1604

This song always gave me some hope..Dont know if any of you can take some comfort from it :hugs:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT0MnvgatrA
xxx


----------



## Mrs G

Hi. Thanks for this thread. 

Apparently this song was written by 2 of the band members who were unable to conveive naturally and had ivf. I think it sums up the situation a lot of us are in at the moment.

So Hard - Dixie Chicks

"It felt like a given
Something a woman's born to do
A natural ambition
To see a reflection of me and you
And I'd feel so guilty
If that was a gift I couldn't give
And could you be happy
If life wasn't how we pictured it
It's so hard when it doesn't come easy
It's so hard when it doesn't come fast
It's so hard when it doesn't come easy
It's so hard"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0bvDpc21Gw

:hug:


----------



## Shelby2007

This is a neat thread! 

Song#1: Hope by the Dixie Chicks

"I hope
For love, joy and laughter
I hope
We'll have more than we'll ever need
I hope
We'll have more happy ever afters
I hope
We can all live more fearlessly
And we can lose all the pain and misery
I hope, I hope"

Song#2: Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne
I put the whole song on here.. I just love it.. 

Na na, na na na, na na
I miss you, miss you so bad
I don't forget you, oh it's so sad
I hope you can hear me
I remember it clearly

The day you slipped away
Was the day I found it won't be the same
Ooooh

Na na na na na na na

I didn't get around to kiss you
Goodbye on the hand
I wish that I could see you again
I know that I can't

Oooooh
I hope you can hear me cause I remember it clearly

The day you slipped away
Was the day I found it won't be the same
Ooooh

I had my wake up
Won't you wake up
I keep asking why
And I can't take it
It wasn't fake
It happened, you passed by

Now you are gone, now you are gone
There you go, there you go
Somewhere I can't bring you back
Now you are gone, now you are gone
There you go, there you go,
Somewhere your not coming back

The day you slipped away
Was the day i found it won't be the same noo..
The day you slipped away
Was the day that i found it won't be the same oooh...

Na na, na na na, na na
I miss you


----------



## Shelby2007

Has anyone heard Sissy's Song by Alan Jackson.. I just heard it on the radio.. and am crying my eyes out.. :cry:


----------



## Jessa

I haven't heard the Alan Jackson song. I've heard Avril Lavigne's song used quite a bit at times like this.

After having listened to all the sad songs yesterday, I'm really trying to focus on songs about persevering through hard times and being strong.

Here are a few I've been listening to today:
Dress Rehearsal by Carolyn Dawn Johnson
I Dare You To Move by Switchfoot
I Hope You Dance by Leann Womack

The Dress Rehearsal song is hitting home today. Here's why:

"Life doesn't wait for us to get it right
Day after night
It just goes on when it goes wrong
It goes and then it's gone
So I'm gonna do my best
To make the most of it
Avoid regret, Yeah
Take a breath and realize
Time is irreversible
This ain't no dress rehearsal."

I guess it just says to me that I need to acknowledge what was, never forget, but move on. I have to be strong if we're going to continue to try and make that perfect little baby that we want so badly.


----------



## vickielm

I never read into the words! But this is a great thread and i cry my eyes out at anything at the moment,especially a powerful meaning song. when i am on my own more than anything. I think it is hurt and hormones!

Keep this post going ladies..

Vik
x


----------



## Jessa

Hi vickie. It's definitely hurt and hormones. I just found out last Monday that our baby's heartbeat had stopped at about 14 weeks. I've been off of work ever since (I'm a school teacher). My hubby went back to work yesterday, so I've spent some time sitting in front of the computer listening to music and crying my eyes out. I think that's healthy though. Keeping everything bottled up inside won't do anything to help me over the coming days, weeks, and months.


----------



## Shelby2007

Oh man.. that sounds like a really good song (the dress rehearsal one).. and I loove LeAnn Womack :)

You could ALWAYS turn on Journey - Dont Stop Believin.. and get up and dance.. that songs always makes me feel better :hugs:


----------



## Mrs G

Jessa, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I hope you are starting to find some comfort and that you are able to grieve for your little one. It makes these songs even more poignant after an experience like yours. Even though I am sure there is little that can be said to change the way you feel remember we are all here to support you hun.
:hug:


----------



## Jessa

Mrs G, thank you for the message. I had a good day today. Today was the first day that I got out of the house - by myself. I went to pick a few things up at Walmart and had a couple twinges when I saw women out shopping with their babies, but I felt okay. I go back to work on Monday, so I'm working towards that. Thanks again for your support.


----------



## Shelby2007

Jessa - please let us know how Monday goes. I hope that with time.. things get easier for you. You have been through a lot.. and no one should ever have to go through this.. :hugs:

I know how you feel about seeing other women with their baby.. I have a 3 month old nephew that I see everyday.. and my sister in law is 19 (and VERY immature) - she is constantly telling me how great it is to be a mother.. and she cant wait to feel pregnant again.. not because she wants another baby.. but because she just LOVED being pregnant.. I really could slap her..


----------



## Jessa

Yup, I know exactly what you mean. I get frustrated when I see other women who I deem "unworthy" of having kids. That sounds absolutely awful when I type it out in black and white. I mean the women who are yelling and screaming at their kids in Walmart or aren't paying any attention to their child as they're waling. I know that I shouldn't judge, but it's really hard not to right now.

I feel like I'm almost ready to go back to work. I'm going to start to get bored being at home all day, which means I've got nothing to do but think. Being at work would at least give me something to take my mind off of things for a few hours everyday.


----------



## Mrs G

Jessa said:


> Yup, I know exactly what you mean. I get frustrated when I see other women who I deem "unworthy" of having kids. That sounds absolutely awful when I type it out in black and white. I mean the women who are yelling and screaming at their kids in Walmart or aren't paying any attention to their child as they're waling. I know that I shouldn't judge, but it's really hard not to right now.
> 
> I feel like I'm almost ready to go back to work. I'm going to start to get bored being at home all day, which means I've got nothing to do but think. Being at work would at least give me something to take my mind off of things for a few hours everyday.

I hope you are having an ok day.
I know exactly what you mean about thinking people "unworthy" - I do that too. Our house looks out onto a field and I look out at the families playing there and think "I deserve a baby more than her because....." Most are for the obvious reasons like you said, yelling etc but sometimes I do have to scratch around for a reason, like she has bad hair, or I don't like her coat....! Bad I know!


----------



## Jessa

But this feeling of other people not being worthy will disappear over time - as the emotional wounds become less raw. After our first miscarriage, I felt that way all the time but then seemed to get over it somehow. I think that over time you start to have days where you might not think about the miscarriage or your experience at all. That's probably when things are just back to "normal". I can't remember after our first how long that took. I know I'm not there yet with this one, but it has only been ten days. I'll get there eventually.


----------



## Shelby2007

So I totally dont really care for Miley Cyrus .. but I heard this song earlier.. and it gave me chills..the words are amazing.. and just what I needed to hear.. so thought Id share. I also put the link for you ladies.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NG2zyeVRcbs

The Climb
By Miley Cyrus


I can almost see it. 
That dream I'm dreamin 
But there's a voice inside my head saying you'll never reach it. 
Every step I'm taking. 
Every move I make feels 
Lost with no direction. 
My faith is shakin. 
But I,I gotta keep tryin. 
Gotta keep my head held high. 

There's always gonna be another mountain. 
I'm always gonna wanna make it move. 
Always gonna be an uphill battle 
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose. 
Ain't about how fast I get there. 
Ain't about what's waitin on the other side. 
It's the climb. 

The struggles I'm facing. 
The chances I'm taking. 
Sometimes might knock me down but 
No I'm not breaking. 
I may not know it but these are the moments that 
I'm gonna remember most, yeah. 
Just gotta keep going. 
And I, I gotta be strong. 
Just keep pushing on 'cause, 


There's always gonna be another mountain. 
I'm always gonna wanna make it move. 
Always gonna be an uphill battle 
But Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose. 
Ain't about how fast I get there. 
Ain't about what's waitin on the other side. 
It's the climb. 

Yeah-yeah 

There's always gonna be another mountain. 
I'm always gonna wanna make it move. 
Always gonna be an uphill battle 
Sometimes you're gonna have to lose. 
Ain't about how fast I get there. 
Ain't about what's waitin on the other side. 
It's the climb. 

Yeah-yeah-yea 

Keep on moving, 
Keep climbing, 
Keep the faith, 
Baby. 

It&#8217;s all about, 
It&#8217;s all about the climb. 
Keep your faith, 
Keep your faith. 

Whoa, O Whoa.


----------



## Jemma_x

This is a great thread.

Song 1: Chari Nolan - (I know) You'll be there

Written by a girl who lost her father to cancer and she decided to record the song and donate the proceeds to a hospice. Everytime i listen to this song and watch the video i cry, the words are just so true. We played this song at Laurens funeral so it means alot to me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdBYmi5HRrQ


Song 2: Faith Hill - There you'll be

In my dreams
I'll always see you soar
Above the sky
In my heart
There will always be a place
For you for all my life
I'll keep a part
Of you with me
And everywhere I am
There you'll be
And everywhere I am
There you'll be

These words just mean alot to me because i know no matter were i am or what i do Lauren will be there looking down on us.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpaBQPspLXg

Song 3: Mariah Carey - One sweet day

This song is the other song we played at Laurens funeral, although this song has me in tears every time i listen to it, the words are just so true and it really is an amazing song.

Sorry, I never told you, all I wanted to say. 
Now it's too late to hold you. '
Cause you've flown away, so far away.

Never, Had I imagined, yeah, living without your smile. 
Feelin' and knowing you hear me. 
It keeps me alive. Alive!

And I know you're shining down on me from Heaven,
Like so many friends we've lost along the way, 
And I know eventually we'll be together.
One sweet day. 

Picture a little scene from Heaven.

Darling, I never showed you.
Assumed you'd always be there.
I took your presence for granted.
But I always cared
And I miss the love we shared.

And I know you're shining down on me from Heaven.
Like so many friends we've lost along the way.
And I know eventually we'll be together.
One sweet day. 

Picture a little scene from Heaven.

Although, the sun will never shine the same, I'll 
always look to a brighter day.

Yeah, Lord, I know, when I lay me down to sleep,
You'll always listen, as I pray!

And I know you're shining down on me from Heaven,
Like so many friends we've lost along the way, 
And I know eventually we'll be together.
One sweet day. 

And I know you're shining down on me from Heaven,
Like so many friends we've lost along the way, 
And I know eventually we'll be together.
One sweet day. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzeMzo_4pxA


----------



## Jessa

Jemma, I can't imagine going through what you've been through. I'm glad that music was a part of your healing. Music is like that for me as well. Thanks for including those songs.


----------



## Bambino2011

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UJXPkRMe4I


----------



## Chilli

Songs are the only way I can let myself grieve my babies these days, here's mine - when I felt so alone even with my partner at my side this helped:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NRdA0ST4Zg


----------



## msfoxymax

Chilli said:


> Songs are the only way I can let myself grieve my babies these days, here's mine - when I felt so alone even with my partner at my side this helped:
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NRdA0ST4Zg


This song makes me cry so much esp as it is used in the uk for the nspcc full stop campaign :cry:


----------



## msfoxymax

I had a mc last year and the lyrics to les miserables 'on my own' always make me think of what could have been. 

And now I'm all alone again nowhere to turn, no one to go to
without a home without a friend without a face to say hello to
And now the night is near
Now I can make believe he's here

Sometimes I walk alone at night
When everybody else is sleeping
I think of him and then I'm happy
With the company I'm keeping
The city goes to bed
And I can live inside my head

On my own
Pretending he's beside me
All alone
I walk with him till morning
Without him
I feel his arms around me
And when I lose my way I close my eyes
And he has found me

In the rain the pavement shines like silver
All the lights are misty in the river
In the darkness, the trees are full of starlight
And all I see is him and me forever and forever

And I know it's only in my mind
That I'm talking to myself and not to him
And although I know that he is blind
Still I say, there's a way for us

I love him
But when the night is over
He is gone
The river's just a river
Without him
The world around me changes
The trees are bare and everywhere
The streets are full of strangers

I love him
But every day I'm learning
All my life
I've only been pretending
Without me
His world will go on turning
A world that's full of happiness
That I have never known

I love him
I love him
I love him
But only on my own


----------



## MandiiG

I know this post is old but a lot of songs helped me with my stillbirth. another song i still listen to a year later is

who youd be today - Kenny Chesney &
I saw God today - ?? 

Hope these help whoever is in need of a good song.


----------



## EmmaRea

I totally agree with "Who You'd Be Today" by Kenny Chesney.

And there they go, just thinking of it, the tears are flowing...


----------



## bdawn8403

Hmmm I feel out of place with the music that has helped me.


----------



## KahluaCupcake

These haven't necessarily helped, per se, but they have touched me, made me cry, and related to the situation. And I'm afraid they'll forever be Sammy's Songs in my heart. 

First, there's You'll Be In My Heart by Phil Collins from the Disney movie/musical Tarzan. If you've never seen this....you may want to get a tissue ready. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxiH8xia-no
This past weekend, only days after my d&c, I saw the live musical version of Tarzan. I don't know if anyone else has seen it, but it was very difficult to watch the first 15-20 minutes of the show. I spent that time with a constant flow of tears. It was extremely emotional, a story of a lost child, a family starting anew, the death of parents, and the adopting of a child by the grieving mother. 
I have always dreamed of this being a special song between myself and my child. I just never knew it would be this way. 



Next is a song that seems unrelated. Some of the lyrics are fitting...but it has a lullaby cadence to it. Perhaps it was just because I was already grieving and sensitive, but it really touched me. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHXw_jf_jH4

"When I saw the break of day
I wished that I could fly away
Instead of kneeling in the sand 
Catching teardrops in my hand 

My heart is drenched in wine
But you'll be on my mind..forever"




Last, this song from Wicked, "For Good"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtMN3mXmvqU 
I heard it the morning after I found out I was pregnant. And I absolutely cried. I knew then that something was wrong, that this may end with our parting ways. I know it sounds silly...its just a song. But it just....I don't know what. Reasonated with me, I suppose you could say. 


I don't know why these things happen. And I don't know why some of us just know they're going to happen. And why some of us know instantly, and some of us go for weeks still feeling pregnant. 
But shed a tear, don't be afraid to cry. Don't hide your emotions from yourself. Your child wouldn't want you to. 
And you are all loved.


----------



## Mrs G

WOW I remember this thread from the old days! Thanks for finding it again!

I've a couple to add - 

Third Day - When the rain comes (am not personally into the whole religious message of this group but I think the lyrics are very apt)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFXni5L4E3k

And this one maybe a bit odd but I saw Wicked recently and this just blew me away! I find it a really uplifting and positive song, great to sing and dance around to!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7L8Tgk6__7o

Lots of love and luck to all.

PS great to see Jessa's status xx


----------

