# Do you know why your angels died - Update for me



## cindersmcphee

Hi

Just wondered how many people know why their babies died. I had early m/c at 6 weeks in July. Then fell pregnant with twins, lost one twin at 9 weeks and then Zac died at around 15 weeks (mmc discovered at 16 week scan). I am waiting for post mortem results but am dreading that they are going to tell me that dont know why he died and that I have just been "unlucky". I am 38 so dont have time on my side but I dont think I can go through ttc again without knowing what caused it as I am sure will just happen again.



Update

Got my results today and he had downs. Dr told me that early m/c and loss of one twin is very common and that reason for late loss was that he had Downs. He has taken bloods from me and hubby to test but thinks that unlikely that anything will come back as not common and feels that we should try again whenever we feel ready. So at least I have some answers.


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## Imalia

We kind of got half an answer with our angel. He died due to a circumvellate placenta and hyper-coiled umbilical cord, but they couldn't give us any reason but "unlucky" that those things happened.


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## cindersmcphee

Thats what I am dreading, I dont think I can bear being told that I am just unlucky and not to worry that will be fine the next time.


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## babesx3

i had a full post mortema nd full bloods taken from me... i had a mmc at 18 weeks , my baby had died about 17 +3
They found no reason at all for his death. there was nothing wrong with him he was perfect. nothing wrong with me , my blood, cord or placenta... just unlucky doesn't really feel so good :(
Makes me fear a LOT for this baby...
although i'm not sure if having a reason would make u feel any better..:( although i guess it would give them something to test for in the future...
I am 38 in september by the way!! :friends:


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## iloveblue

Still no reason for us yet - consultant's appointment is on March 15th (almost 5 months after we lost our baby!!).
But I do have a feeling that we are not going to get any definitive answers.


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## cindersmcphee

Hope I dont need wait 5 months. They told be that would be around 6 weeks.


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## MrsWez

I had an incompetent cervix. Lost my baby at 20 weeks. I now have to have a cerclage placed at 14 weeks during every subsequent pregnancy.


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## spellfairy

i ve been given nothing yet. nurse said when we were picking up the body after post mortem that the path. had said the baby looked perfect, so i dunno? i think it was a sch as i had clots passed, bleeding and a huge clot seen at 9 weeks under baby:( we will see what they say. i felt him kick night before , he came without hour of cramps, he came out so quick:( il never forget him nor stop loving him.


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## iloveblue

cindersmcphee said:


> Hope I dont need wait 5 months. They told be that would be around 6 weeks.

They told us 6-8 weeks, but it took over 12 weeks just for the PM results to come through.
It does seem to vary widely from hospital to hospital so I really hope you get your answers on time.

I'm so sorry for your losses x


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## MaevesMummy

I knew from week 10 that I prob had a clotting disorder. It was gut instinct. I have been seen since 2007 for Systemic Lupus, so Anti Phospholipid Syndrome is likley. My tests were negative at week 5 but my health went bad at week 10.
I bled almost constantly. It was heavier than a period by week 16 it was intermitanly pumping out. I passed large clots. One broke my waters. I had pPROM at 18 weeks. My little girl didnt grow beyond 20 weeks. I went into labour at 21+5 and despite all odds she lived for an hour and a half.
It turns out I have APS, as I was telling them. Very sad.
I am now on Asprin and clexane, currently 12 weeks and all seems ok.
I had to wait 12 weeks for PM. they told me 6-8 but it was 12.
I am sorry for your loss. Whatever happened, it was NOT your fault, and with so many marvelous things in todays world there are lots of things that can be done. Please try to live one day at a time, be kind to yourself i know its hard.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## LoolaBear

Sonnie had numerous problems which they linked to a chromosonal defect, they couldnt quite decifer what strain of defect as her tissues had started to breakdown by the time they came to it.
it definately has helped knowing that it wasnt me, that i didnt hurt my baby in any way.
hope you get your results sooner rather than later, it took 9 weeks for mine to come through and those 9 weeks were hell, but once i got the results i could stop blaming myself.
:hugs: xx


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## ACMB060609

Lost my baby boy at 16 wks in 08 they dont know why still he just died.. The not knowing is the worse


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## lily123

Edwards syndrome.
x


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## Andypanda6570

lily123 said:


> Edwards syndrome.
> x

They think mine was the same Trisomy 18, that is what my blood came low for. I need to wait another 3 weeks for the results to confirm this. If it was this then I wont blame myself as much, it can happen to anyone.
My condolences, this has been devastating :hugs:


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## lily123

Andypanda6570 said:


> lily123 said:
> 
> 
> Edwards syndrome.
> x
> 
> They think mine was the same Trisomy 18, that is what my blood came low for. I need to wait another 3 weeks for the results to confirm this. If it was this then I wont blame myself as much, it can happen to anyone.
> My condolences, this has been devastating :hugs:Click to expand...

:hugs: i'm so sorry for your loss :hugs:


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## annmc30

so sorry for your loss, i lost my little girl in july 2010 i was 16wks but she had died at 13wk due to turners syndrome


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## Hevalouaddict

i dont know why i lost my twins but my mil says it wasn't my time but she talks about them all the time and asks when im going to try again


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## Andypanda6570

Hevalouaddict said:


> i dont know why i lost my twins but my mil says it wasn't my time but she talks about them all the time and asks when im going to try again

I am so sorry for your loss, I don't think there is any reason or any time. Take your time in healing and know that we understand and you can talk about it with me or anyone if you need to. i have been quiet for over 2 weeks and now I finally feel like reading and posting. Again i am so so sorry xoxoxo:hugs: I don't even have the heart to take my signature down ;


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## bea marshall

i don't know why my little girl died but i sometimes wonder if it is because i have sle and cfs and huges syndrome. so i hope you get an answer and may we walk the roads to gether


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## Vickieh1981

I never found out why :( We chose not to have Isabella tested though only me and the placenta


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## cindersmcphee

Thanks for replies. I chased hospital up today as still not heard anything. They contacted patholigist who said had sent out full report on 14th March and hospital dont have. So they are resending and I have to phone tomorrow to make an appt.


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## kam78

I was told the reason for my preterm labor was probably an infection... But just got all my results back last Friday & she and I was perfectly healthy, no infections... So, guess that falls under... Unlucky : (

Hope if we do try again, they can put a cerclage in as soon as I find out I'm preg..

My angel was taken from me 9 days ago... Emma Gail&#9829;


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## Snowball

I didn't have Beau tested but with the fall and there being large blood clots on the placenta, they put it down to a placental abruption.


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## Andypanda6570

I should get the results this week . They think it was Trisomy 18 and if it was then I wont blame myself as much. :cry::cry::cry: I lost her March 3rd but it feels like yesterday :cry:


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## hopingtobemum

we didnt ever get a reason. PM results all came back normal, then I had another miscarriage at 12 weeks 6 months after and so had tests on us which all came back normal. But now I am having another miscarriage - early one this time. 

So sorry if this doesn't help - doesn't mean it'll happen to you. 
Good Luck xxxxxx


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## jojo23

i got all results except one back ysterday and everything was clear. they cant find any reason why i lost Lily at 22 weeks other than bad luck... my doctor sort of put things in 0perspective and said im lucky they didnt find anything because if they did then i might need treatment etc to get pregnant! he sai i should be thankful that im healthy and have had no complications and i can ttc straight away. theres one more test they did to see if my blood is clotting too much which can cause clots in the placenta umbilical cord etc but he said he's 99%sure that will come back clear.

ill never get over Lily but i know theres nothing i did wrong and im blessed to have had her in my life for the little time i had her. love you always angel xxx

fingers crossed for a sticky bean next time! xxxx


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## secretbaby

Yes and No - I know that I had PPROM at 20.6 weeks and this led to our babies lungs not developing and our baby coming at 27 weeks (and the complications of extreme prematurity). But we are never going to know why I had PPROM - I had none of the 'factors' that make your high risk, and no infection - it has been put down to the annoying phrase of 'one of those things'. It drove me mad at first but in time I have learnt to accept that I will never know why this happened (I then went on to have a baby in feburary this year where ironically I had to be induced at 39 weeks dut to bp problems).


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## Mellybelle

My Kyle was tested for chromosomal abnormalities. Nothing found. Everything was normal up until he died. I dont have any results back for my most recent angel, but the NT scan and bloods showed everything was normal and I saw the heartbeat on U/S three days before he/she died. My GP is going to run some tests for me for clotting disorders.


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## Tasha

My seven early miscarriages are most likely due to my clotting disorders, Honey was a mix of PROM at 28 weeks, no waters for 8 weeks, placental problems because of the above and medical negligence, and Riley Rae is having a post mortem so hopefully I will get answers at my next appointment on the 21st June, I think we will either get told it was a placental problem or chromosone. :cry:


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## janie0

Wow, we have almost identical stories babesx3. Congrats on your pregnancy, BTW. I also had a mmc at 18 weeks - full pm & bloods, baby measured 17+3 & no reason why it happened. No chromosomal abnormalities, placenta problems, etc. I'm also turning 38 this fall but unfortunately I'm still to scared to try again. We really do want another but I'm still not sure I can handle if something 'unlucky' were to happen. 



babesx3 said:


> i had a full post mortema nd full bloods taken from me... i had a mmc at 18 weeks , my baby had died about 17 +3
> They found no reason at all for his death. there was nothing wrong with him he was perfect. nothing wrong with me , my blood, cord or placenta... just unlucky doesn't really feel so good :(
> Makes me fear a LOT for this baby...
> although i'm not sure if having a reason would make u feel any better..:( although i guess it would give them something to test for in the future...
> I am 38 in september by the way!! :friends:


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## cindersmcphee

Thanks for the responses. I am glad I found out the reason why I lost Zac, it has given me a little peace knowing why.


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## Tasha

:hugs::hugs: sweetie, I am 'glad' you have answers


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## MissMaternal

We lost Freya at 20 weeks due to clotting in the placenta. We don't have reasons for our other losses. xx


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## niknak242

I don't know why yet. But I do hope I find out.


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## SarahJane

niknak242 said:


> I don't know why yet. But I do hope I find out.

Sorry for your loss hun. Hope you are doing ok :hugs:


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## lily123

I'm glad that you got some answers finally :hugs: x


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## Andypanda6570

I lost Ava at 18 weeks 7 weeks ago and I got the report and the cells did not grow :cry: My doc said it was definitely NOT downs or Trisomy 18, he said it was 99 percent a chromosomal problem but they just don't know which chromosome, how could that be? I am totally confused and I am getting more depressed everyday over this. :cry::cry:


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## cindersmcphee

Andypanda6570 said:


> I lost Ava at 18 weeks 7 weeks ago and I got the report and the cells did not grow :cry: My doc said it was definitely NOT downs or Trisomy 18, he said it was 99 percent a chromosomal problem but they just don't know which chromosome, how could that be? I am totally confused and I am getting more depressed everyday over this. :cry::cry:

I am so sorry it is horrible not getting any answers. It just seems awful when they can't tell us why these things happen. Are they going to do any further testing on you and your partner or anything?


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## Andypanda6570

cindersmcphee said:


> Andypanda6570 said:
> 
> 
> I lost Ava at 18 weeks 7 weeks ago and I got the report and the cells did not grow :cry: My doc said it was definitely NOT downs or Trisomy 18, he said it was 99 percent a chromosomal problem but they just don't know which chromosome, how could that be? I am totally confused and I am getting more depressed everyday over this. :cry::cry:
> 
> I am so sorry it is horrible not getting any answers. It just seems awful when they can't tell us why these things happen. Are they going to do any further testing on you and your partner or anything?Click to expand...

No not at this time :hugs:


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## Mellybelle

Hi Girls, 
I just got my results back today. Actually I was at work and accessed the hospital pathology system. I dont know how to read all the results, but I do understand the parts I need to. Baby was a little girl (it was VERY important to me to find this out) and there were "no aneuploidy or unbalanced chromosomal rearrangement was detected". The exact same results as my little boy who I lost at 14w+1 last year. 
I had blood taken today. I have asked my GP to test me for a range of clotting disorders. Hopefully, i'll have the results back soon. Will keep you ladies posted. I refuse to accept "bad luck" as the results of two second tri losses and two early losses.


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## Mummy of Ange

I lost my twins at 23 weeks due to a water infection. I went into labour early hours Christmas Day, both James and Jack born alive but died shortly aftewards, they were beautiful but just too small.

Consultant told me next time i will be on a low dose of antibiotics throughout the pregnancy and maybe have a stitch put in because i was fully dilated within half an hour xx


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## Andypanda6570

Mummy of Ange said:


> I lost my twins at 23 weeks due to a water infection. I went into labour early hours Christmas Day, both James and Jack born alive but died shortly aftewards, they were beautiful but just too small.
> 
> Consultant told me next time i will be on a low dose of antibiotics throughout the pregnancy and maybe have a stitch put in because i was fully dilated within half an hour xx

I am so deeply sorry :cry::cry: :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## momto4girls

my loss was almost a year ago. I never got an answer. All I got was that I was "unlucky" There was nothing wrong with me or the placenta. Baby was growing accordingly and just died. After the D&C the doctor sent the baby off for testing, all of which came back normal. Baby just died. :cry:


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## babyfromgod

I am so sorry to hear of all your losses :hugs:


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## ericacaca

Our "special appointment" with consultant is on Friday, 2 months on. Although it was originally 6 weeks after but we had to reschedule. 

We know that baby's intestines were growing on the outside so they were very poorly as the insides had no bag to protect them from the fluid (most babies with that condition do). Still very sad and still feeling the unfairness of it all! xxx


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## spellfairy

update on my post mortem. My baby died at 19-21 weeks i had bleeding from 6 weeks he just didnt wanna be in this world. Docs say the placenta was not sent and because the baby was dead a few days before i gave birth they couldnt grow cells. they said eerything was perfect but ther was calfication of the liver which is sometimes a sign of downs/ edwards and another chromosones thing:( but they cant tell as he died and they lost placenta:( i also had a sch sub cronic heamota (spelling:( ) so in a weird twist this actually in fact lost my baby... i knew from when i got pregangt it wasnt right! 5 monhts later i was clear:( i lost him in jan 13th:( iam due again 21 jan one year later will be one happy and sad week for me...


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## Tasha

Massive :hugs::hugs: spellfairy. 

I have had two little girls born sleeping, Riley Rae one month and ten days ago, and her big sister Honey four years nine days ago. 361 days after Honey was born sleeping, her little sister Kaysie Blossom was born screaming, it was a very emotional time, my point of telling you this is so you know you are not alone in having your Rainbow baby due around the time of your angel baby's anniversary. If you ever need to talk, send me a message :hugs:


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## spellfairy

Update. My baby looked perfect but had calicfication of the liver which is linked to 18,21 and the other one:( more than likely downs, also


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## ms.hope

Mummy of Ange said:


> I lost my twins at 23 weeks due to a water infection. I went into labour early hours Christmas Day, both James and Jack born alive but died shortly aftewards, they were beautiful but just too small.
> 
> Consultant told me next time i will be on a low dose of antibiotics throughout the pregnancy and maybe have a stitch put in because i was fully dilated within half an hour xx

:hugs:sorry for your loss--I also miscarried twins (boys) mine identical at 22 weeks-I also went into premature labour but I still don't have conformation as to what caused it:cry:


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## Mellybelle

Hi ladies, I posted in this thread earlier, but i'll recap with my update.
I have had four losses and two children. I had two early losses, then two second tri losses. Both babies were tested for any chromosomal abnormalities, none were found. There was no uterine infections found. No reasons why my babies died. I have had blood tests for everything, autoimmune disorders, clotting disorders and everything has come back normal. The FS was also going to test for NK cells but I am now pregnant again, so they cant test right now. He thinks it is unlikely as I also have two children. 
It was really difficult to have him go through the results with me and show me that everything is normal. I was praying for a reason and a prevention to stop it happening again. I know that there IS a reason for my losses, but I guess I'm not supposed to know what it is.


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