# lets talk about bras!



## going_crazy

Hi all, hope someone can help me! :flow:

I have 3 DD's aged 6,7+8. 

My 8 year old is like a little bean! She's very slim (does NOT take after me lol) and is nowehere near 'developing' anything yet and her attitude is "oh well!" :D She's in the middle of my avatar <------- (taken 2 years ago!)

My 7 year old has a lovely figure too, but is much broader (not fat, just sturdy!) and has started to 'develop' a little chest wise - although nothing major, but just noticeable! She's my 'girly girl' and her attitude is "my friend (just one friend I think) wears a bra and I want one too. I want to be a big girl!" She's to the left of my avatar <-------

My 6 year old is very much the same as my 7 year old in the way of build. Although in terms of development, she has had something in the chest area for quite a while now! Her attitude is "I'm a boy and I do NOT want any boobies!" lol She's (obviously) to the right in my avatar <--------

All of my children are taller than average, and currently I am buying age 10yrs+ clothing for all of them! :shock:

So here's my issue!

1) at what age is it a good idea to buy a "trainer bra"? - by this I mean I do NOT want anything that has underwiring, padding etc, just a simple crop-top style 'first bra'

2) how do I approach the fact that my eldest daughter isn't needing a "big-girls bra" but her 2 younger sisters do - should I buy her one too?

3) it seems ridiculous for me to be thinking of buying a "bra" for a 6 year old, but she is going to need something within the next year, but she won't wear anything that is pink or girly and I'm sure they don't do spiderman crop tops!! lol Any ideas?!?!

Oh, and anyone know where's a good place to buy, please let me know!!!!

Oh dear, if I'm like this about bra's, goodness knows what I'll be like when it comes to periods!!!!!

Sorry for the rant ladies, I'm just a bit lost! :lol:

Thank you! :flower: xxxxxxxx


----------



## b23

I guess you should give your eldest daughter the option, if she wants to wear one she can, if she doesn't then it doesn't matter. I guess if you don't make an issue of it, neither will she. I was in M&S today looking at baby things and they had some crop top style ones in there, plain white, couldn't tell you anymore about them as I didn't take much notice! If they are all wearing roughly the same size, then it doesn't single out your eldest and if she decides she doesn't need/want to wear one then your other two can make use of them until she decides she wants to wear one too. I think it's a very personal thing - it totally depends on the build of the child, and what their views are whilst thinking about your own views as their mum, too. Not quite sure how much help that is?! 

And your girls are gorgeous btw!


----------



## mari72

i think if your 6 yr old needs a bra you should maybe see a dr, its really immature/precocious for such a little one to need a bra. Breast development is a sign of puberty and 6/7 even 8 is very young. Unless they are just overweight but your post seems to imply that they are just big all over for their age, maybe if their breast development is conspicuous you should speak to a dr.
really mean this in a nice way, its way too young for a 6 yr old to have breast buds


----------



## going_crazy

mari72 said:


> i think if your 6 yr old needs a bra you should maybe see a dr, its really immature/precocious for such a little one to need a bra. Breast development is a sign of puberty and 6/7 even 8 is very young. Unless they are just overweight but your post seems to imply that they are just big all over for their age, maybe if their breast development is conspicuous you should speak to a dr.
> really mean this in a nice way, its way too young for a 6 yr old to have breast buds

Hi, thanks for your reply! :flow:

I totally see what you are saying, as I said, my 8 year old has absolutely nothing whatsoever, and she has never mentioned about any of the girls in her class wearing any form of bra!

My youngest was born with breast buds and I remember the midwives saying it was because my high level of hormones had been passed on to her during pregnancy/birth. They have always been there and the doctors have never been concerned - she has 3 monthly chest examinations/xrays for her asthma and I stopped asking if she was "normal" a while ago as everyone told me she was fine!!
This is why I don't want to be getting a 'bra' as such - I've seen the crop top styles. https://direct.asda.com/george/kid-...-seam-free-crop-tops/GEM33454,default,pd.html this is the type I'm thinking about, and they start from age 7 - I'm thinking of buying them for all 3 of my daughters just to start them off. 

I also thought that age 6 (well, she's almost 7) was too young to be thinking of this, but apparently I started to 'develop' at 7 years and my mum was told by the doctors to put me on hormone tablets at the age of 8 to bring on my periods!:shock: to which my mum told them to bugger off!! lol Maybe early development runs in the family :wacko:

Anyway, I really appreciate your imupt, just to give me another view on the situation :thumbup: 

If you get a mo, have a look at the Asda link and tell me what you think?

Thanks again hun xxxxx


----------



## going_crazy

b23 said:


> I guess you should give your eldest daughter the option, if she wants to wear one she can, if she doesn't then it doesn't matter. I guess if you don't make an issue of it, neither will she. I was in M&S today looking at baby things and they had some crop top style ones in there, plain white, couldn't tell you anymore about them as I didn't take much notice! If they are all wearing roughly the same size, then it doesn't single out your eldest and if she decides she doesn't need/want to wear one then your other two can make use of them until she decides she wants to wear one too. I think it's a very personal thing - it totally depends on the build of the child, and what their views are whilst thinking about your own views as their mum, too. Not quite sure how much help that is?!
> 
> *And your girls are gorgeous btw!*

Thank you hun :blush: xxxxx


----------



## mari72

They are v pretty but i think they are a bit grown up for a 6 year old as they are v obviously trainer bra. Marks do a racer back crop top that looks a little more vest like for the little ones and it starts age 6-8. Its more like a cut off vest offering more support than a bra which i think is better when they are so young. 
I presume your girls have only breast buds and no other signs of puberty? These days the drs would probably offer a medication to slow onset rather that quicken it, but there is a genetic element in puberty so it could just be down to mum!!! x


----------



## going_crazy

mari72 said:


> They are v pretty but i think they are a bit grown up for a 6 year old as they are v obviously trainer bra. Marks do a racer back crop top that looks a little more vest like for the little ones and it starts age 6-8. Its more like a cut off vest offering more support than a bra which i think is better when they are so young.
> I presume your girls have only breast buds and no other signs of puberty? These days the drs would probably offer a medication to slow onset rather that quicken it, but there is a genetic element in puberty so it could just be down to mum!!! x

I completely agree that the M&S ones are more appropriate, and for DD3 (who thinks she's a boy:dohh:!) I think they would suit her.

There are no other signs of puberty in any of my girls - well, unless you can include the complete "I know everything" attitude :haha: And yes, I think the puberty thing is genetic, so I also blame myself :blush:!! 

Thanks again for your input, much appreciated! :flower: xxx


----------



## milkmachine

you could get some white ones and dye them darker colours for your yongest? have some fun customising x


----------



## MariaL

mari72 said:


> i think if your 6 yr old needs a bra you should maybe see a dr, its really immature/precocious for such a little one to need a bra. Breast development is a sign of puberty and 6/7 even 8 is very young. Unless they are just overweight but your post seems to imply that they are just big all over for their age, maybe if their breast development is conspicuous you should speak to a dr.
> really mean this in a nice way, its way too young for a 6 yr old to have breast buds

I agree. 6 year olds don't need bras.


----------



## xolily

wow at some of the replies. if it makes you feel any better, my little sister started developing at around 6/7 years old and HAS worn a crop top/bra since that age. not all children are the same. xx


----------



## going_crazy

xolily said:


> wow at some of the replies. if it makes you feel any better, my little sister started developing at around 6/7 years old and HAS worn a crop top/bra since that age. not all children are the same. xx

Thank you very much, this has made me feel better! I think some people are quick to reply without having any experience in the area. At first 6 does sound very young when you mention a "bra" but realistically I wanted something that offered some support yet wasn't too "teenager-ish!"haha:)

I *know* there is nothing "abnormal" about my children - even the 6 year old who needs some 'support' in the chest area and who thinks she is a boy(!)

And as mari72 pointed out - it could be genetic and as I developed early, maybe they are too!! :D

Anyway, I have found what I was looking for - thanks again to mari72, they are very simple yet offer a little bit of support - https://www.marksandspencer.com/Pac...66030&sr=1-1&mnSBrand=core&_encoding=UTF8&rh= if anyone is interested!! Oh, and they start from age 6-8 but I've had to buy age 9-11 as my 6 year old measure this size - maybe this also says something about her needing to wear them!




Thank you to everyone who has replied, it is nice to see the mixed responses xxxx:thumbup:


----------



## samsugar7

Hi i have just seen your post and id love to hear how things develop. My Step Daughter is 5 and has no signs at all but her older sister is 10 and he mum has just put her into a training bra. And of course her little sister wants one too. Now her mum will just buy her some to keep the peace but i do think that she is too young especially as she has no signs at all of developing. 

Her dad makes her wear vests if the weather is a bit cold but i think bras/crop tops is a bit far. I was wondering if any of their school friends notice or say anything, and also if you get any feedback from other mums? I think that the thril of wearing one will wear off on her quite quickly unless her friends start talking about them all th time, thats why im interested. 

Thank you 

Sam


----------



## 24/7

I think I first started wearing a crop top in about year 5, and I lots of the girls had been wearing them for a long time before I did. I remember the day I did my 11+ exam, coming out with all of my friends and walking over to our mums, who were all discussing how we were "developing" and who was wearing what in terms of crop tops and bras, we were all mortified. :haha:


----------



## going_crazy

samsugar7 said:


> Hi i have just seen your post and id love to hear how things develop. My Step Daughter is 5 and has no signs at all but her older sister is 10 and he mum has just put her into a training bra. And of course her little sister wants one too. Now her mum will just buy her some to keep the peace but i do think that she is too young especially as she has no signs at all of developing.
> 
> Her dad makes her wear vests if the weather is a bit cold but i think bras/crop tops is a bit far. I was wondering if any of their school friends notice or say anything, and also if you get any feedback from other mums? I think that the thril of wearing one will wear off on her quite quickly unless her friends start talking about them all th time, thats why im interested.
> 
> Thank you
> 
> Sam

I shall keep you updated if there is any further progress, although I'm in the opposite situation - my 8 year old doesn't need anything (and therefore I'm unsure whether to buy her one or not) and my 6 year old does! I've ordered the ones from M&S for all of them and I hope they are suitable. 

My 7 year old informs me that her friend doesn't wear one like the crop tops I've bought, but she wears a bra which does up at the back and has patterns on it! I was quite shocked at this as my DD is much 'bigger' than her friend and I don't like the idea of the 'teenage' bra's on my little girls!!

I know a couple of other girls in my 7&8 year old classes wear the crop tops, but not sure about year1 (6 year old). It will be interesting to have some feedback from other parents too, but as I said previously, my DD's are much taller/bigger than the rest of their classmates, so not sure if they are thinking along my lines yet!!

I personally wouldn't buy my 6 year old a crop top/trainer bra if she didn't need one, but I am hoping she gets along ok with it! She does have a great little attitude and hopefully there won't be any horrible comments towards her! xxxxxx


----------



## going_crazy

24/7 said:


> I think I first started wearing a crop top in about year 5, and I lots of the girls had been wearing them for a long time before I did. I remember the day I did my 11+ exam, coming out with all of my friends and walking over to our mums, *who were all discussing how we were "developing" and who was wearing what in terms of crop tops and bras, we were all mortified*. :haha:

Thanks for your reply, I have to say this bit made me giggle! :rofl: I hope I don't become a mum that embarrasses my daughters (although that comes with the job description, doesn't it?!?!:winkwink:)


----------



## 24/7

going_crazy said:


> 24/7 said:
> 
> 
> I think I first started wearing a crop top in about year 5, and I lots of the girls had been wearing them for a long time before I did. I remember the day I did my 11+ exam, coming out with all of my friends and walking over to our mums, *who were all discussing how we were "developing" and who was wearing what in terms of crop tops and bras, we were all mortified*. :haha:
> 
> Thanks for your reply, I have to say this bit made me giggle! :rofl: I hope I don't become a mum that embarrasses my daughters (although that comes with the job description, doesn't it?!?!:winkwink:)Click to expand...

Thankfully I can laugh about it now. :haha:


----------



## morri

If your kids just have breast buds I don't think they would need bras unless they wanted to wear them. I myself got some plain ones when I was 12 13 (late developer) but I didn't like it really and saw it as unneccessary. A book about puberty on girls that my sister owned had also a bra guide in it and it said that you only need a bra of you have at least b cups but a cups don't need any. I still don't wear bras because I have small breasts and I don't like bras.


----------



## mari72

I have to be honest i think we are sometimes in a rush to put our kids in the next phase, i honestly don't see the need for a bra unless your boobs are jiggling about and need support, i have really small boobs and the only reason i wear a bra is to make them look a little bigger not to offer any support so my opinion would be hold off on anything other than a vest as long as possible. That said i think going crazy seems really sensible and its not a bra she wants her girls wearing its just something to offer some support-maybe a tighter lycra vest would be ok for the youngest-but would imagine these aren't easy to come by? Have vests gone out of fashion? When i was young we all wore vests and graduated to bras at high school (those needing bras before this wore a vest over the top to prevent unnecessary teasing-i live in scotland, maybe its the cold that makes us so keen on vests) Girls are definitely developing younger these days though which is such a shame. There was an article in the daily mail about early puberty being related to chemicals in food etc etc just the other day. Anyway hope your girls get on fine with their crop tops crazy xx


----------



## going_crazy

mari72 said:


> I have to be honest i think we are sometimes in a rush to put our kids in the next phase, i honestly don't see the need for a bra unless your boobs are jiggling about and need support, i have really small boobs and the only reason i wear a bra is to make them look a little bigger not to offer any support so my opinion would be hold off on anything other than a vest as long as possible. That said i think going crazy seems really sensible and its not a bra she wants her girls wearing its just something to offer some support-maybe a tighter lycra vest would be ok for the youngest-but would imagine these aren't easy to come by? Have vests gone out of fashion? When i was young we all wore vests and graduated to bras at high school (those needing bras before this wore a vest over the top to prevent unnecessary teasing-i live in scotland, maybe its the cold that makes us so keen on vests) Girls are definitely developing younger these days though which is such a shame. There was an article in the daily mail about early puberty being related to chemicals in food etc etc just the other day. Anyway hope your girls get on fine with their crop tops crazy xx

You really have hit the nail on the head...... I have said from the start that it's not actually a "bra" I wanted, and I didn't want my young children to look like teenagers. I just really feel that they need *something* to give a small amount of 'support' (especially during P.E and when they do their karate) and also something to keep them covered a bit - my 7yr old has mentioned that the boys in her class have asked her why her chest is 'bumpy':shock: I vest would be fine for 'covering up', but not sure about wearing one in the warmer weather? Also, in my opinion, they are not flat-chested, but they don't have boobs either - they are just at the really early stage of development! I'm not looking for a fashion accessory!!!

I really don't want any of my girls growing up too quickly :cry: and I honestly wouldn't be looking at crop tops etc if I didn't feel it was necessary.

I want to thank everyone for their replies, and if you're interested, I am picking the crop tops up tomorrow so will give a quick update after they've worn them once or twice!

Thanks again ladies xxxxxx


----------



## Char&Bump-x

MariaL said:


> mari72 said:
> 
> 
> i think if your 6 yr old needs a bra you should maybe see a dr, its really immature/precocious for such a little one to need a bra. Breast development is a sign of puberty and 6/7 even 8 is very young. Unless they are just overweight but your post seems to imply that they are just big all over for their age, maybe if their breast development is conspicuous you should speak to a dr.
> really mean this in a nice way, its way too young for a 6 yr old to have breast buds
> 
> I agree. 6 year olds don't need bras.Click to expand...

Do you know every 6 year old in the world? No, you dont, so how could you possibly know what this particular little girl needs.


----------



## steffi2

Your daughters are very pretty. My daughter is turning 6 in August and for the last year she seems to be developing a bit too. She is the tallest in her class and wears size 12 clothes. She is also 67 lbs so I don't know if her looking slightly developed has anything to do with her weight and the fact that she is a big girl. I don't think I will be putting her in a training bra yet until it becomes a little more noticeable....I didn't have boobs until I became pregnant so I don't think she got it from me.


----------



## KrisKitten

I see you've already had all of the input you needed so iv nothing to add to the bra issue,
just wanted to say you've handled some of the comments on this thread beautifully.
I dont think you would of been blamed for getting irked with some of the blunt comments on here so to have replied so eloquently and understandingly is lovely to read :)
You sound like a lovely lady, your girls are lucky to have you :hugs:
xxxxx

(ooh and good luck with the periods :haha:)


----------



## 24/7

How are they going OP? :D xxx


----------



## going_crazy

24/7 said:


> How are they going OP? :D xxx

Thank you for asking!

I ended up buying the plain white crop tops from M&S and they are brilliant - just like short vests (but a little tighter).

My eldest (8) loves them - she says it's just like the one her friend wears and she's very comfortable wearing them most days
My middle (7) also thinks they are wonderful - she says the boys "don't bother looking at her" when she gets changed for PE now, and she says it's very comfortable
HOWEVER(!) My youngest (6) put it on and didn't like it straight away. I took it off of her and told her they'd be in the cupboard for whenever she wanted to try them again. She's absolutely fine with that and said she'd try them again in YR2! 
I'm fine with that, I always thought to myself if they weren't ready then I would be led by them. 

So, I think a success for the older 2 - they are very happy and just wait for when my youngest is ready! Not too traumatic at all!!

:flow: xxxxxx


----------



## 24/7

Glad to hear that 2/3 like them, it's brilliant!! :D
Sounds like you have some wonderful little ladies there!! xxxx


----------



## emilyjade

hiya hun i know the issue of buying bras/crop tops has been solved but i want to say that i was wearing ones like them you posted from asda when i was about 7ish?! i dont think i was too young, i think you have done the right thing buy getting them used to the idea and even with your youngest ! x


----------



## going_crazy

emilyjade said:


> hiya hun i know the issue of buying bras/crop tops has been solved but i want to say that i was wearing ones like them you posted from asda when i was about 7ish?! i dont think i was too young, i think you have done the right thing buy getting them used to the idea and even with your youngest ! x

Thank you hun, it's nice to know I'm not completely mad!! (well, with this issue anyway!):haha:


----------



## MoonMuffin

Glad they are going so well! I started getting boobs around 9 or 10 and by age 12 they were already at a c-cup. My mom refused to let me get bras till age 12 and this caused my boobs to get saggy, I needed a lift and reduction at 16 and the doctor was a bit shocked at how low they were and said a bra from when the first started showing would have helped prevent it. I need another lift after having kids (they are saggy again and I don't like them) but that wont happen unless we win the loto :lol:
so point being, better to have them on training bras now then to have saggy boobs later :lol:


----------



## Sarah5642

Give the oldest the option. Currently my 8 year old is a b cup and she is some times in a bra and sometimes not.
Make the 2 youngest have to wear a bra and the oldest gets a choice, just gat them a white small ump added no wire training bra.
I'm in the similar situation as u so pls message me ur results.
When I was 10 I was a 24D cup and my mom would not get mea a bra until I was 13 so I'm sooooo saggy now( I 10000000000% hate my breasts)! So now I'm a 38L!


----------

