# When & how did you potty train toddler with communication delay



## BabyJ'sMummy

Hi guys, I haven't been in this section for a while, we thought DS's speech delay etc was all down to his glue ear and that everything would be ok after he got his grommets but that's not really been the case :-(

We're back to thinking that he may have Autism and the SALT has now referred him to CAMHS for possible diagnosis.

So anyway, my question is how to go about potty training when his speech is very delayed and his communication isn't great? Not sure when to start trying, he'll be 3 in May. xx


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## Aunty E

Hi hun, may not be any help as we haven't managed it yet, but we have tried a couple of methods. We've done the all out method, and just went for it and that was the most successful, just before she turned three. It was going slowly but in the right direction when I had to go back to work (could only take a week off) and we had to put her back in nappies for childcare, which basically seemed to really confuse her and she went straight back to wetting randomly. Now, I put her in pants when I'm at home and she stays in them until she has more than a couple of accidents without trying to get to the potty. She will stay dry all afternoon at nursery, and generally will go all day without an accident so long as we put her on the potty regularly. We've never tried nighttime. I've been thinking about buying some plastic sheets for her bed and going the whole hog again next time I have some holiday. Imogen does talk more these days, but one thing that is helping is a dolly that wees. We role play on the potty with dolly quite a bit and sometimes dolly goes on the potty when Imogen does. You can get boy ones too.


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## mummy2o

Oss has just been potty trained now and he's 5 and a half. Due to his autism he is under sensitive so has no idea when he needs to go to the toilet which is annoying. We have to take him every hour for a wee and he will stay and go. For anything else its hit and miss if you catch him at it. If its any help my sons paediatrician said its normal to see autistic children not having a clue until 7-8 but then learn the skill over night


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## Shezza84uk

I had huge issues with DD she is diagnosed with Specific speech and language impairment and had no idea what I wanted her to do in the potty. The only suggestions I have is to wait until they show signs of being ready, I started trying at 2 and she just became distressed I then tried every 3 months and eventually this Easter at 4yrs 4 months I saw her trying to hold her wee by doing the wee wee dance lol and rushed her on the potty ( I left the potty in the lounge).. 

I gave her lost of praises and eventually she associated the two and realised what she needed to do and started using the potty herself I am happy to say she is now dry day and night and uses the toilet instead of the potty. 

I think if I had forced her or put a lot of pressure she would still be in pull ups now but following her lead made all the differnce


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## BabyJ'sMummy

Thanks for the replies  I was going to just go for it over the Christmas period because I'm off uni for three weeks and see how it went but I'm not really sure if there is much point if he can't communicate that he actually needs. Is it worth trying and then he might start to communicate when he needs it? He did a pee on the potty once before bath when I left it out so he does know what it's for. The dolly idea might be a good one actually! xx


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## mummy2o

It also helps during the summer months. There must be a reason but generally people favour summer over winter.

I always but DS on the toilet before the bath and when he was actually making himself go thats when we decided to try it


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## mommy2lilmen

*lurking* 
Summer months are easier becasue you can go outside more, bring potty with you, and limit the accidents in the house.. ummm I was told summer months are also easier as the child needs to drink more to keep hydrated, therefore making them have to pee more! 
I havent yet begun to potty train my 5ths on who is pddnos, I am too scared of a melt down. Mentally Im not ready so I dont want to get frustrated and get him upset, and he has only given me clues by going on the toilet himself with pants and diaper on. Nothing else. :(


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## Aunty E

So someone tipped me off to this amazing (and a bit icky) app for Iphones/ipads. It's by Avakid and is called see me potty. The only bad thing about it is that you can't change the words they use (we use wee wee and poopy and the app uses pee pee and poop), but other than that you personalise the little character and then it walks through using the bathroom. Imogen LOVES it, watched it obsessively and then enacted the pee pee video before bathtime, complete with wiping bum and washing hands. I don't know if it will help with the knowing when she needs to go but it's a good start!


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## BabyJ'sMummy

My phone's a bit rubbish for apps but I'll def take a look on OH's phone  x


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## sun

Hello we started potty trained my son in late June. A big reason we gave it a shot so soon was because I wanted to get him into a specific preschool that started in September and they required him to be trained. Because of his birthday he is the youngest in the class, but we made it! :)

My son understood what it was about, but was very resistant to the idea and would get upset if I mentioned anything. So I decided to just try it out without discussing it. One day I took off his diaper and started just taking him to the bathroom every 1.5h or so without warning. Normally he is much better with lots of notice and reminders of what will happen next, but he was not like that with training. After about a week of accidents I was ready to stop and start again in a month or 2 as he was still quite resistant. But at this point he was WAY more resistant to the idea of wearing a diaper (meltdown!), so we persevered with it. It didn't upset him at all if he had an accident - he would just take off his pants and continue on LOL. It took about a month for him to start holding it until we brought him to the loo, but took another month on top of that for him to start letting us know when he had to go. So for us it took about 3 months to get to the point where we were confident that he would tell us 95% of the time. He would have the occasional accident after that (especially when distracted) but has now been accident-free for about a month. He will be 3 years old on the 14th. He still wears a diaper for sleeping and I don't think we're going to quit that any time soon. I'm so proud of my guy! It was a bit of a long road, but we got there. And he loves his big boy underwear. :thumbup:


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## BabyJ'sMummy

That's brilliant sun, 3 months isn't bad at all, my niece was longer than that lol! Really trying to work on DS understanding yes and no at the moment. I think potty training would be a lot easier if we could achieve that. When I ask if he wants something eg an apple, rather than saying yes, he'll say 'apple' or sometimes 'more apple' even though he hasn't actually had any yet. I actively encourage him to say yes and now and again he'll say something that sounds like it. Baby steps at the moment. x


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## Samiam03

Thanks for posting this. I'm having the same issue. My son knows how to say poop but he doesn't realize what it means. I keep trying to get him to make the connection so we can start potty training but no luck so far. He is only 2 so I am hoping he learns soon. He has all the other signs of readiness but until he can tell me he needs to go it is pointless. We even tried putting him in regular underwear because they are supposed to not like the feel...he ended up just sitting in it and didn't even try to tell us he went...that idea didn't last long.


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## mummy2o

Samiam03 does your son make noise or faces when he's doing a poo? My son does so when we see signs he's going to go we race him to the toilet and he'll go there. He's only been at it properly for just under a month and is dry most of the day now. He even asks to go sometimes. We need to remind him every hour and a half to go if he gets distracted, but even with the poop he's only had a few.


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