# Opinions before i reject hen night invite?



## Kiki1993

Hi, some background I was invited to an ex co workers hen night, not the wedding just the hen night. We aren't that close, we get on and are friendly but we don't meet up or anything. 
Anyway, I got invited about 5 weeks after everyone else which I found offensive but was stil going to go to celebrate with her (she got engaged just after me) but then I found out from my friends its our ex boss who is her friend organising it, it is at her house and then to the pub with them. Now I don't know if anyone has read posts about my ex employers but it didn't end well, they did nothing but torture me. Made me work through sickness, work with too many responsibilities for job title, they told me to lie or be fired, i had to look after their pets, put up with their children who would often say "Well my mummy said i can come in and make as much mess as i want because you all have to do what she says", they made fun of a co worker when she came out (why she left) and when i told them my dad wass terminal they said thank you for letting me know, thats it, they also said because he isnt my biological dad i wouldnt be entitled to any leave, when i got a call at work for mums cancer they made me work while i was in tears for 2 hours, they called me into their office and would be just horrible, they said they didn't care about my mum or dad, i still had to come to work when he dies .. i would get 3 days for my mum but only because thats a legal matter, they tried to keep me from my holidays claiming i had used them all but i threatened them with citizens advice and then they finally backed down, they tried to set up a co worker for robbing the place when clearly they set it all up and the police have now cleared her. ANYWAY, now my dads died i don't think i could stomach being around them, i dislike them very much, reported them for the way they run their business and treat their staff as has 3 other staff members who left. I could not handle going to this persons house, and not saying anything, now i dont need them as reference or anything i dont think i could handle playing nice with people who made my life and my families life hell. Anyway the bride knows everything that went down, she knows how i reported them and tbh because we aren't that close i feel like im being set up in a way. IT would just be me, this girl, the management, and the brides sister .. i just don't want to put myself in an awkward or dangerous situation as i am guessing they know i have reported them by now?


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## Tasha

I wouldnt go, it's not like you would be not going to your BFF or anything. It just isnt worth the stress IMO xx


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## Camlet

I agree I definitely wouldn't go as you even said it sounds like a bit of a set up to me tbh :-/ I honestly can't see any good coming from this xx


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## maryp0ppins

No I wouldn't go, and I certainly would never go to a hen do if I wasn't invited to the wedding----that just seems a bit strange to me.


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## Kiki1993

Ok thank you all, i just declined and said it was due to money, and she hasn't responded, i feel for her, no one is going but i dont think she really wanted me there anyway, im the only one who wasn't invited to the actuaal wedding which also seemed strange x


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## mandy_grovie1

Yeah hun you made the right choice. Seems like maybe she was inviting you because everyone else rejected her invite? Which is terribly rude.


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## Kiki1993

So she is now married, i bumped into her yesterday and she confided in me how she is leaving her work (my ex work), desperately trying to find a new job because they have turned on her now :nope: I feel for her, she feels trapped because she has bills to pay but there is always a way out She told me they gave me a bad reference (i already knew this because my 2 new employers told me and said it was so obvious they were being spiteful because i left) 
Anyway when I went to say sorry for not making it to the hen she said she didn't want me to go because it was management who suggested inviting me :wacko: 
We actually got talking and got on really well, she asked for my advice when applying for new jobs because so far she hasn't been invited to any interviews and asked how I managed to get new jobs when they give anyone who leaves bad references. If anyone is in that situation I suggest saying when they ask why you are leaving your last job as a "disagreement with the way it was managed" .. seemed to work with me with my interviews :thumbup: 
It was strange I asked how everyone was and she told me how everyone is looking for new jobs now except one member of staff who is actually a student. I'm kinda glad I bumped into her, made me realize leaving was the best decision i could have made, i was regretting it because if i had stayed i could have gotten a mortgage because its permanent and would have gotten mat leave shortly after. Now I realize it was an amazing decision and so many doors for me have opened since. 
Apparently there hasn't been an investigation from care commission since all the ex staff complained which makes me think something wrong about this whole situation. 
I'm just glad I am now in a better place, two amazing jobs, going back to get my degree - will take about 4 years but worth it :thumbup:
Just hope OH gets this new job he has applied for, the extra money would mean we could save for a mortgage and move out in 2 years and get married the same year if we save enough :thumbup:


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