# TTC #1 38yrs old



## Jz75

Hi. I've read a lot here but first post. Learning lingo please bear with me. 
I'm TTC #1 at 38. My husband is 35. I HSG tested in June and all good. He tested sperm- all good. Been trying since around nov. dr wants to IUI in oct if we aren't PG by my annual pap in sept.
I used opk and got solid smiley day 9 of cycle.
DTD that day and every other day until day 14 of cycle.
Work schedules not allowing DTD again for at least 3 days.
I have cramps on right side for a few days worse when sitting or laying down. Kept me awake last night day 15. 
Have had them a little In Past but this time feels like more.

Questions lol sorry so long:
1. Has anyone experienced cramps on right side on these days and then been PG?
2. Has anyone done IUI and if so did it work first time?


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## Alita

Hello and welcome here . for a second i thought it was me posting  just got 38 DH is 35 and about to do the IUI as well .
success rates seems to be 10 percent only so i am counting on doing it a few times if the first one doesnt work. 
We plan our first try without drugs .
How is your amh and FSH? 

I do experience cramping right before ovulation but also some pains on one side after ov and ,before periods or any time in my cycle ,its easy to symptom spot too much when we are ttc specially when we are running against time 
my advise is that is best to ignore them unless they really bothering you ..(.if it kept you awake i would get checked though )
I've lost so much time thinking i was pregnant in the 2ww that i am now trying to focus on other things like being healthy and positive .. Easier said than done but worth a try ..
Lots of baby dust !
A


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## Jz75

I don't know about either of those fertility levels. My Dr is convinced everything is fine with me and only did the HSG. I wanted blood work and she said it is t necessary. I trust her Bc she divered my BFF 's first child but I also feel something's that she is being a bit casual. 

I do agree that I think too much about it all. I am concentrating on relaxing but once that TWW approaches I start thinking again. 

Thank you so much for repling. I can not listen to one more "relax" "it will happen when it happens" or " I got PG after I did this..." From a 34 year old or friends that are PG or have kids. 

It is scary when you are 38. I look fwd to hearing more from you about success naturally or after IUI which hopefully niether of us will need! My husband and I have put aside enough for one or two rounds (NYC is so expensive for everything and none covered with new insurance) and we are prepared to go a third if need be.


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## Alita

i think depending on how long you been trying , might be important to get your blood checked , on the other hand if the tests come not very good (happened to me ) then it will put much more stress on the whole situation and that's not ideal .
I conceived last year naturally after i was told i had really low amh (, amh is the amount if eggs you have left and some people believe is a indicator of when you will reach menopause )
My gyno told me to get pregnant now !!she insisted there was no time to waste so i got stressed out about it but 4 months later i was pregnant ( added supplements to my diet , used preseed and softcups ect) , but miscarried at 8 weeks ..very sad. 

Now we started trying since last march , nothing yet , so decided to go for IUI , unfortunately my AMH is even lower now .. So i am still very nervous, cry a lot feel hopeless , mind you if I didn't know my amh levels i wouldn't be so down as only got pg 9 months ago .
My new FS tells me not to obsess with my amh numbers, he said he thinks we will make it again,i love him for that , he gives me hope  

I think is very good that you decided for IUI , sometimes bypassing the cervix and perfect timing is what you need .. 
We will start on my next cycle which is in less than2 weeks , trying to be very healthy and will start accupunture next week as well.
When do you start your IUI?

funny i used to live in NY when i was a young girl , have you tried accupunture ? There is so much TCM in NYC and is quite affordable maybe that's something for you to look at ,herd so many amazing stories about accupunture already and it did help me when I had other problems .

There is this beautiful book called inconcievable , the author is a woman (Julia ..) is a very good read for older woman trying to concieve..if u have the chance read it ,it really helped me to stay calmer and see things different.

Wishing you great luck and baby dust 
A


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## Jz75

We have only been really trying for about 10 months ( started in nov). We were married last August. Our first Anniversary is Monday. I have my annual pap in sept and I am in the TWW right now from August cycle. Praying I am pregnant but way too early to tell. AF due sept 4. Sept 17 I go for annual and will be trying that week as well if I'm not PG now. Once I go in for annual in sept I will be moving toward setting up IUI for oct for the first time. 
I'm hopeful each month but have learned the hard way not to expect anything. Crying usually starts the day AF arrives followed by a bottle of wine and lots of pouting. By day two of AF I try to end my pity party and move on.
I'm going to try to start Accupuncture right after next AF. Already have a great one on standby that my friend used. Also trying to start private yoga with my husband that our friend teaches. 
Hardest part other than the obvious wanting to be PG is watching literally ALL of my friends getting pregnant who are our age or a touch younger. 
I'm so happy for all of them I truly am but as time goes by I find it harder and harder to not feel jealous. 
As for the testing you mentioned I do believe the reason my dr isn't doing it is Bc she doesn't want me to think about it. She's probably right. 

In summary lol: ovulated this week. Hoping I am PG now. If not I will try once more in sept and at the same time set up all appts for IUI for Oct. 

Nyc is awesome. You should come back &#55357;&#56841;&#55357;&#56841;&#55357;&#56841;


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## popchick75

Jz75 said:


> I don't know about either of those fertility levels. My Dr is convinced everything is fine with me and only did the HSG. I wanted blood work and she said it is t necessary. I trust her Bc she divered my BFF 's first child but I also feel something's that she is being a bit casual.
> 
> I do agree that I think too much about it all. I am concentrating on relaxing but once that TWW approaches I start thinking again.
> 
> Thank you so much for repling. I can not listen to one more "relax" "it will happen when it happens" or " I got PG after I did this..." From a 34 year old or friends that are PG or have kids.
> 
> It is scary when you are 38. I look fwd to hearing more from you about success naturally or after IUI which hopefully niether of us will need! My husband and I have put aside enough for one or two rounds (NYC is so expensive for everything and none covered with new insurance) and we are prepared to go a third if need be.

I would without a doubt get blood work done...at the very least CD3 and CD21 bloods. That's how you tell if you're ovulating. Clear tubes won't matter if you aren't ovulating! Kind of surprised she didn't do that...that and an internal ultrasound is usually the first thing they do.


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## Jz75

I know everyone has a story and a journey and I pray that we all get to a very happy ending! I will discuss all of these things you ladies have advised with my dr. 
Thanks so much!
Baby dust!


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## Jz75

I could not log on for so long I thought I lost this thread!
Updates to share - anyone out there? &#128521;


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## Lyvid

Did you do iui yet or get some more tests done?


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## Jz75

Hi Lyvid!

So I finally got all my testing done.
Went 12/2/13 last Monday to go over all of my results.
FS tells me I have DOR and not a lot of time left. 
DH is all good.
My head starts spinning. Trying to absorb when he says "in a perfect world if everything was free I would want you to do IVF immediately"
I ask him about IUI. He tells me % is much lower for success.
I ask him what the next steps are since I'm about to ovulate. He decides to scan me right then and there ( for free bc he is amazing) I blurt out "I didn't shave my legs" he tells me "neither did I, let's go." He does the scan and determines I have follicles (he's doesn't give me numbers and I am in a tailspin with my legs up and don't think to ask). He tells me I am about to ovulate and he prescribes ovidrel shot says take it 12/3/13 Tuesday between 6-10pm and I am there 12/5/13 Thursday morning for an IUI. 
DH 40 million swimmers ! Dr is happy.
We DTD that night and the next tonight to "back it up" which is now a dance the receptionists and I do to the alarm of all the other patients. 
So now I am 8 days later - by the way does that make me 7DPIUI or 8? 
Soooo I don't get crazy AF or PMS symptoms. 
I've had pretty consistent pulling dull ache in lower right occasional left that started as cramps and twinges from day 1-3 and then tapered off to dull pulling feeling.
Vivid dreams but not unusual for me.
Sore throat and cough runny nose all days but I am a nanny for a toddler so....
Nauseaus day 6
Boobs full but nothing alarming
One day or minute I'm in the best mood on earth like a lobotomy victim the next I will rip someone's face off. But I am a moody New Yorker so....
One week down for TWW.
Loosing my mind
Doing IVF out of pocket in NYC if not PG now. 
I'm ranting. Sorry.
Any advise, buddying up or info is most welcome.


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## Lyvid

Hi :hi:

LOL about your legs! Don't worry, once you get pg and get to the end you won't be able to shave them, and you really won't care lol!

I think that would make you 7dpiui, too early to test yet. Being a POAS addict I started testing at 9dpo this month :blush: All bfn and I think AF will be arriving tomorrow :shrug:

Symptom spotting can drive you crazy! Oh and I understand New Yorker's, I grew up on Long Island! Do you have some ic tests you can use? It's the only thing that get me through the end of the TWW.


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## Jz75

First of all... I just googled POAS because I wasn't sure what it meant and then I spit tea all over my phone when I read it bc it is histerical! 
I'm not a POAS addict it turns out I am a IPDBILML ( I am in denial because I like my lobotomy) 
I also am mortified 90% of the time bc I cant afford waxing my lady parts and my FS copays so..... TMI maybe but I am ATMIA (a TMI addict) 
I don't use or do IC tests? Not sure what those are? Aren't those for determining pain like UTI's? 
My "feelings" are not painful or anything like UTI. 
They are either nothing and I'm reaching or maybe they are my uterus doing something that is new to me because my IUI was successful. 
Is that what they are for?
So happy that you have a little one already and exciting to be TTC #2. 
I am a firm believer in not worrying until you see that mean old lady, AF. Funny how she used to be my bestie. 

I'm just so anxious and scared. The DOR diagnosis was unexpected and devestating. 
I feel like each month is now a race against time.

If I were pG now the due date would be my husbands birthday and our wedding anniversary. Not gonna lie, that would be cute. 

Thanks for listening to my rants.
Strong Island!!!!! That's where my dad is from. Moms from Brooklyn. What what!!! 
&#128521;&#128521;&#128521;&#128521;


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## Jz75

Also, I know how to spell better than this!!!! Sorry.


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## Lyvid

Well AF arrived today as predicted. Ah well. And I'm taking next month off. Too much stress with Christmas et al (I think my predicted ovulation date is Christmas Day!) Plus I want to lose a bit more weight so I'm gonna kick that into high gear for a few weeks. 

IC is "internet cheapie" pregnancy tests. The most common brand is Wondfo and you can get them on Amazon, Ebay etc. I just bought 50 for $18.99 on Amazon. They are cheap and more sensitive than most brands you can buy in the store which means you can start testing a lot earlier. I got my BFP on one at 9dpo. If you read the pregnancy tests forum you'll see them there a lot. Lots of POAS addicts over there, makes me feel less crazy LOL! BTW here's a link to the thread on abbreviations that you might find helpful  https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/forum-help-testing-area/730-babyandbump-lingo-abbreviations.html


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## Jz75

I'm so sorry to hear that! My next O date is over Xmas also!
I either just got my AF today 9dpiui or I have heavy spotting.
I'm leaning towards AF but something about it feels weird so I will test tonight and in morning to be sure &#128546;&#128546;
If it is AF I will be calling my FS Monday to start my IVF path.

I'm feeling so down and I'm heartbroken to tell DH later tonight.


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## Lyvid

:hugs: FX that its not AF.


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## Jz75

It is most definitely AF. 
I'm feeling really low today. 
I'll give myself today to have a pity party and then try to gather myself to move forward and get ready for IVF.
I don't know why I am so upset since I knew that the chances were so small this would have worked.


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## Lyvid

So sorry it's AF. And I completely understand the feeling low. We can't help but get our hopes up each month, we put our all into it and usually in life that's what it takes to get what you want. You hear a tip about TTC and the person who gave it to you says that's what worked for them, so you figure for sure you'll catch this month. A little tweak and everything will be working fine, right? Then AF arrives and your hopes are dashed. TTC is a cruel time during the TWW. 

So I don't know much about IVF, is it completed in one cycle or does it take longer?


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## Jz75

I have my consultation January 3rd and the goal is to start that month since AF is due sometime middle ish of month so hopefully that is enough time to order meds and start bc day one of cycle is day one of IVF cycle as well. I will know more after appt. but it should take one cycle unless something goes wrong.

thanks for listening and sharing with me.
I will keep you posted !
Hoping you have the best holiday and new year if we don't touch base before then.
Xo


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## Lyvid

Glad you were able to get the consult so quick! Of course there's still time for a Christmas miracle.... Will keep my fingers crossed for you.:dust::dust:

Happy holidays to you too! Don't wait to long to update after the 3rd!


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## Jz75

Feeling anxious and excited. Have a cold. 
Went for IVF consultation on 3rd and now today the 7th am staring at an enormous box of meds that I had to have delivered to work and just want to get home and get organized
Waiting for period to start any day between tomorrow and Saturday to set up first IVF dr appt to begin and get my bloodworm and ultrasound. Also will get my IVF calendar that day to begin meds that week I beleive. 
After over a year of praying for my period to not arrive I am praying for it to arrive by Thursday because ideally you want the 1st cycle appt on day 2 of cycle and my dr is not open on weekends for this appt. 
I'm feeling tired and emotionally worn out but I have a cold so that may be what is getting me down. I am hoping to feel better about it all after my period arrives and I get the calendar. 
Waiting gives me anxiety &#128540;
Lack of control makes me crazy 
I am hoping to have a better update soon! 
I will say that my dr is amazing.


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## Future Mom

Good luck Jz75!!! :dust:


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## Jz75

Ok, ladies. I began IVF cycle on Saturday. Saturday night I was in fetal position on the floor crying and bopping like a lunatic bc I could not figure out how to mix the menophur. Thank god I found an on call nurse through fertiltiy pharmacy who saved me.
I wasted two vials of meds that probably will cost me another $10,000 &#128540; but now I feel like I am doing it properly. 
I have my second blood work and ultra sound to check how I am responding to meds Tuesday morning. 
This may sound odd but I am saving money for a second round now bc somehow it makes me feel better if I approach this as: ok. I am being hopeful and positive but I am afraid to not prepare myself if it fails.
My big sister is super positive and good vibes and feels really good about it and it makes me feel so happy to have her in my corner and at the same time I feel like I have to keep a balance of reality with a 25-30% chance at sucess.
Please don't judge me. I sound like a negative person and I am not. I think it is a defense mechanism bc I am scared to get my hopes up. 
If I were a normal person I would probably be happy that I can even do IVF , that I have no cysts or major problems to overcome and that my first appt went well. 
Does anyone else feel this way?


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