# HELP PLS!! Swim instructor banged my daughter's head



## LaughOutLoud

My 7yr old has been having group swimming lessons for past 8 weeks but yesterday it was just her and the instructer, but obviously other lessons are going on and I was also sitting watching my daughter having her lesson. 

It was going well with my daughter responding to her and then the instructer told her to get out because her next lesson was going to start. My daughter started making her way to the side and just before she got near the steps, she decides to dive and try to do a handstand which they were practicing that day. The instructer got annoyed that she didn't get out and yanked her, pulling her swimming costume from her back and pulled her up. I saw her yanking her up and she was clearly annoyed saying 'get out now my next lot have arrived'. I took my daughter into the changing room and there she started whimpering placing her hand on her head and I asked what was wrong but she was so shaken up I couldn't hear what she was saying as her voice wasn't coming out. I asked her to speak up an realised she was saying she banged her head. I felt a big bruise on the top of her head and asked when it happen to which she replied 'when the instructed pulled her back, she banged her head on the steps' (the steps on the side of the pool inside). 

I calmed her down and went to tell the instructer what happened, but she just said she hadn't realised and that my daughter should listen because her next class had arrived and now as she's talking to me she is now 5mins late. I said I understand she is was not listening but that she should know what happened. I told her she has a big bruise and I'd been running it under cold water and asked where the bruise was and was trying to feel it, but when I was telling her where the bump was she didn't want to listen An was telling my daughter to point where it's hurting. She was dismissively daughter I felt she didn't take us seriously. She didn't apologise or looked sorry about it. I then asked do I document this and where- she didn't even tell me to do this until I asked.

So I spoke with the pool manager and again she was on the defensive that children should listen.

When I got home I was annnoyed at how it was handled so I rang to speak to the manager. She told me the instructer denies she banged her head or pulled her costume to get her out the pool. The instructer said my daughter banged her head by herself before she got her out! I was shocked at the dishonesty and told them I won't be sending her back to have lessons with her. There are no cameras so it's our words against theirs. I know she yanked her out as I saw and she must misjudged and caught her head on the side. 

What else can I do? what would you do?


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## lau86

if you want to take it further I would write a formal complaint. The instructors behaviour is completely out of order.


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## Babybump87

That's absolutely awful. The instructor should have known better. Late or not that's no way to behave towards a child. 

Hers and the mangers response raises eyebrows too !. I would definitely take further action against her . Awful behaviour! ! . Hope your daughters head is ok


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## LaughOutLoud

lau86 said:


> if you want to take it further I would write a formal complaint. The instructors behaviour is completely out of order.

Thank you. Think I will take it further.


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## LaughOutLoud

Babybump87 said:


> That's absolutely awful. The instructor should have known better. Late or not that's no way to behave towards a child.
> 
> Hers and the mangers response raises eyebrows too !. I would definitely take further action against her . Awful behaviour! ! . Hope your daughters head is ok[/
> 
> Thank you. It's better now, not as bad as it was. I felt I had failed my daughter because I wasn't loud enough there. I was numb, but I will ask for their complaints procedure An take it from there.


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## Bevziibubble

Definitely take it further. That is unacceptable and I can't believe that the manager excused the instructor's behaviour like that :nope:


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## MindUtopia

Yes, that's completely inappropriate for any teacher to put their hands on a child unless it is to prevent them from hurting themselves (like if she was drowning). Whether she bumped her head or not, she shouldn't have touched her. She should have waited until she came up and repeat the instruction or she should have called you over to speak to her if she truly wasn't listening. Not listening is not an excuse for physical contact unless it was to intervene and prevent her from hurting herself or another child. I would write a letter as a formal complaint. I would also post to any of their social media (Facebook page, website, twitter, etc.) with your same complaint. I find that when organisations get embarrassed publicly, they are much more willing to take your complaint seriously than if you try to keep it quiet.


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## _Meep_

Vile. I would be so, so, so fucking furious. What a horrible, irresponsible, dishonest woman.

To be honest, I'd probably take it as far as I possibly could, and if I knew other parents whose children take lessons with her, I'd fill them in too.


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## Perkins

What a bitch I would be furious


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## Eleanor ace

That is definitely, definitely not OK. I would take it further and quickly. If it was me I'd probably write to the pool and then call them, tell them that you have put your complaint in writing but want to address it asap because if you don't have an adequate resolution you will be taking it further (reporting to the company who manages the pool and/or the police- that will probably elicit a better response). The swimming instructor shouldn't have put her hands on your child the way she did and her actions resulted in your child being hurt. The manager failed in their duty to address it properly and to advise you on how to take your complaint further; I'm guessing they didn't advise you on treatment for your LO (which they are supposed to do). You saw the teacher pull your DD up by her costume, making you and your LO out to be liars is appalling.


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## LaughOutLoud

Thanks guys. I've rang today an asked for their complaints policy but the guy on the phone said to speak to the duty manager (who is spoken to before) an then her manager. I've got an email address so I'll speak to write in. 

I also think that instructers are supposed to have rules how they remove children from the pool An this wasn't carried out obviously, but the guy on the phone didn't know what that procedure was. In any way it's certainly not by yanking. I didn't mention this in my first post but when I was trying to get the instructer's attention to tell her what had happened, she was ignoring me and walking away- I followed her up before she gave me her attention- think she thought she'll try getting rid of me! Such an awful person!


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## .Mrs.B.

Even if the instructor hadn't bumped your daughters head I would still be furious that someone had pulled my child by their clothes. That is awful and they clearly don't care for children. Expose them.


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## Fruitmash

I agree, expose them. Every social media outlet, if they have a twitter, a facebook, an instagram anything! Name and shame at every available opportunity. This isn't a disagreement, this is a horrific way to treat a child and their follow up where they accuse both you and your child is dispicable. Is there nowhere higher to complain to? A board? I'd even threaten to ring the local paper, I personally would never take my child to a swimming instructor who feels entitled to lay their hands on a kid


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## Lalaloopsie

Sounds like they have a similar protocol to our local swimming baths, deny and pass the blame. Good luck x


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## Wannabe Mommy

Unless it is a private pool in a gym they are usually council run. I would send the email to the manager and also to the council complaints address or cc in your mp. You may or may not get a response from the council but the manager will pull out all the stops to reply if they see that you have alerted the people who fund them.


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## LaughOutLoud

Wannabe Mommy said:


> Unless it is a private pool in a gym they are usually council run. I would send the email to the manager and also to the council complaints address or cc in your mp. You may or may not get a response from the council but the manager will pull out all the stops to reply if they see that you have alerted the people who fund them.


It is council run. I've drafted the email so need to finalise it before s bring to the manager. Not sure who/which department it should go at the council though??


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## Wannabe Mommy

LaughOutLoud said:


> Wannabe Mommy said:
> 
> 
> Unless it is a private pool in a gym they are usually council run. I would send the email to the manager and also to the council complaints address or cc in your mp. You may or may not get a response from the council but the manager will pull out all the stops to reply if they see that you have alerted the people who fund them.
> 
> 
> It is council run. I've drafted the email so need to finalise it before s bring to the manager. Not sure who/which department it should go at the council though??Click to expand...

My council is Leicester and they have a 'leisure and sport's section on their website with a contact us section. Or you can find your np details here 
https://www.mysociety.org/wehelpyou/who-is-your-mp/?gclid=CIO9he-D_NACFXQz0wodCVUIOg


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## LaughOutLoud

Wannabe Mommy said:


> LaughOutLoud said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Wannabe Mommy said:
> 
> 
> Unless it is a private pool in a gym they are usually council run. I would send the email to the manager and also to the council complaints address or cc in your mp. You may or may not get a response from the council but the manager will pull out all the stops to reply if they see that you have alerted the people who fund them.
> 
> 
> It is council run. I've drafted the email so need to finalise it before s bring to the manager. Not sure who/which department it should go at the council though??Click to expand...
> 
> My council is Leicester and they have a 'leisure and sport's section on their website with a contact us section. Or you can find your np details here
> https://www.mysociety.org/wehelpyou/who-is-your-mp/?gclid=CIO9he-D_NACFXQz0wodCVUIOgClick to expand...


Thank you. That's such as coincidence because my council is also Leicester! This happened at the Evington Leisure Centre.


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## Wannabe Mommy

I grew up going to the downing drive swimming baths, lived in scraptoft as a kiddie


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## LaughOutLoud

Wannabe Mommy said:


> I grew up going to the downing drive swimming baths, lived in scraptoft as a kiddie

Awwwww. Well the instructor is actually one of the elder ones - apparently been there when my friend was learning to swim as a kid. Would have thought she'd know better!


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## Wannabe Mommy

If it's the lady who taught me and I can't actually remember her name (might have been Sanders or Saunders???) but she had dark curly hair kept short, solid build.

Anyway she was mean, remember her deflating a scared little boys arm bands and chucking him in the deep end then shouting at him to swim.


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## Eleanor ace

Wannabe Mommy said:


> If it's the lady who taught me and I can't actually remember her name (might have been Sanders or Saunders???) but she had dark curly hair kept short, solid build.
> 
> Anyway she was mean, remember her deflating a scared little boys arm bands and chucking him in the deep end then shouting at him to swim.

Oh my God I would have to fight very hard not to throw the ***** in! Who does that to a child :nope:


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## Wannabe Mommy

Eleanor ace said:


> Wannabe Mommy said:
> 
> 
> If it's the lady who taught me and I can't actually remember her name (might have been Sanders or Saunders???) but she had dark curly hair kept short, solid build.
> 
> Anyway she was mean, remember her deflating a scared little boys arm bands and chucking him in the deep end then shouting at him to swim.
> 
> Oh my God I would have to fight very hard not to throw the ***** in! Who does that to a child :nope:Click to expand...

It was about 25 yrs ago and teaching in general was a bit more 'you will obey because I'm in charge' even so she was scary. Got results though, we all learnt to swim quick &#128517;


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