# Shit shit shit. [update pg 20]



## rjb

I'm in so much trouble..
I just needed to talk to my FOB, I miss him so much.
We ended up talking an hour and my mom came and saw I was on the phone and got mad.
I had to say it was another ex or she would have killed me.
But shit.
If she checks my phone.
Shit.
She'll take away my daughter!


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## laura1991

How can she take away your daughter?


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## x__amour

Rebecca, she's not going to take Adelaide away from you, don't worry. :hugs:


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## newmommy23

She can't take your daughter hun.


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## Burchy314

Se can't take away your daughter! She has no right to. You didn't do anything wrong. Instead she should be there for you and know that you will miss him, I mean he did have a big part in your life. Everything will be ok.


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## Miss_d

She has no right to take away your daughter, your obviously not happy and would like things to work out between you and FOB, and why would she be looking at your phone? obviously i dont know your situation, but your mum cant life your life for you. :hug:


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## Jem_x3

She can't take your daughter away from you as punishment like it's a phone or car keys :wacko: She shouldn't even be checking your phone infact. Don't be scared of your Mom hun, live your life the way you want to and if she doesn't like it then too bad :hugs:


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## jenniferannex

its up to you who you talk to hun, and she definatly in now way can she take away your daughter. and she shouldnt even be looking on your phone! xx


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## rainbows_x

She can't take your daughter away from you, you are her mother and have done nothing wrong?


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## lucy_x

I hope your OK hun, She cant take away your baby...Im here if you need to talk :hugs:


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## rjb

I don't have a job, and my parents told me a court will sign the rights over to them in a flash because I'm young and have no job or place to go :cry:
If she finds I've spoken to him I'm in so much trouble :(
He's supposed to still believe Adelaide isn't his.
But I don't want it to be that way.
It just sucks that I have no control. :cry:


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## jenniferannex

rjb said:


> I don't have a job, and my parents told me a court will sign the rights over to them in a flash because I'm young and have no job or place to go :cry:
> If she finds I've spoken to him I'm in so much trouble :(
> He's supposed to still believe Adelaide isn't his.
> But I don't want it to be that way.
> It just sucks that I have no control. :cry:

ahh hun that sucks :( they shouldnt be able to do that, shes your baby and your baby deserves to know hes her dad. they are telling you to do thing that they wouldnt of taught you, they are telling you to lie to him and they shouldnt be :nope:

how old are you hun if you dont mind me asking? x


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## Leah_xx

Rebecca I know here in Ohio that they wont just sign the rights away to your parents because you have no place to go or have no job, They have to find you as a unfit mother.
My uncles neice was living on her own with no job(couldnt find one) but was being assisted by the goverment to help raise her 5 kids, They got taken away because she couldnt take care of them, they lived in a dirty home, there oldest brother who was 6 at the time was watching them,
I dont know if thats how it is in Georgia


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## hopeandpray

The courts will not take away a child form their parent unless they think that you're putting her in danger which of course you're not :hugs:


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## rjb

I'm 15. 
Even if I had the money to no one would let me rent/buy a house.
I'm having to choose between one family or the other here :((


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## MummyJade

She is your daughter hun and if you want her knowing her dad then she knows her dad... 
is there no other family member that you can stay with? xx


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## rjb

My whole family is against him :/


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## amygwen

rjb said:


> I don't have a job, and my parents told me a court will sign the rights over to them in a flash because I'm young and have no job or place to go :cry:
> If she finds I've spoken to him I'm in so much trouble :(
> He's supposed to still believe Adelaide isn't his.
> But I don't want it to be that way.
> It just sucks that I have no control. :cry:

I know here in TX if you don't have a job or don't have means to pay for your child or pay for a home for your child that those are a couple things against you. But like you said you're 15, you can't even get a job, I can't imagine even if they did try to get custody that it wouldn't be possible. 

Realistically, you need to make your parents happy. If you're living with them and they are paying for your child to have diapers, food and whatever than unfortunately there is nothing you can do. The only thing you could try and possibly do is bring FOB into your life and have them understand how important it is to you to have him around your LO. I can't imagine being in your position, but if I were I would not be taking advantage of the fact that my parents even trying to take custody of my child. I would do whatever I could to make them happy and appreciate what they are doing for me. I don't mean to sound harsh, but if you want to be with FOB, than wait a few years until you can financially support your LO, you can move out and do whatever you want to do and not depend on your parents. Right now you just need to worry about your daughter and your well-being! Why do they not want him around?


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## rjb

Because he got me pregnant.
He had a bad background, but he's stable now.
And waiting a couple years means he misses out on her first words, first steps.
That seems unfair


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## amygwen

rjb said:


> Because he got me pregnant.
> He had a bad background, but he's stable now.
> And waiting a couple years means he misses out on her first words, first steps.
> That seems unfair

It does seem unfair, I agree. If your parents can't be happy with your FOB and bring him into Adelaide's life than unfortunately there is nothing you can do. It's a crappy situation because you can't move out, you can't get a job, you can't do ANYTHING about it. Unless you bring FOB into your life without your parents getting angry about it, have you sincerely talked to them about it? Told them all the reasons why you think it'd be a good idea for FOB to come into your life? Yeah, he got you pregnant but look what came out of it, Adelaide and I'm sure they love her a lot. I don't think it's fair that father's who want to be involved, can't be involved for whatever reason. But honestly, I would rather have a house over my child's head and have custody of them than be with a guy and have to worry about having to go through courts and someone else having custody of my child. The only thing you can do if you want FOB to be involved is sit your parents down and discuss it with them. Even if it is supervised visits with your parents there and it's only for 30 minutes. They have to understand how important it is to you. :hugs:


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## 17thy

Okay, I'm confused. You said in another post that your parents decided what to call your daughter, and now you're saying she'd take your daughter away for talking to your daughters father. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

This may be harsh. But you need to grow up. YOUR MOTHER CANNOT LEGALLY TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER FROM YOU. If she even tries to withhold your daughter from you, you can call the police. Quit letting her have that much control over you and YOUR child. Its seriously sickening. You can talk to the father if you want. Even if he used to be a douchebag. He IS the father. Seriously! 

I hope you really take advice.


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## 17thy

rjb said:


> I don't have a job, and my parents told me a court will sign the rights over to them in a flash because I'm young and have no job or place to go :cry:
> If she finds I've spoken to him I'm in so much trouble :(
> He's supposed to still believe Adelaide isn't his.
> But I don't want it to be that way.
> It just sucks that I have no control. :cry:

Oh, and this is bullsh*t. The court would not give them custody of your child. AT ALL. This thread is literally making my blood boil. NO THEY CANNOT HAVE RIGHT OF YOUR CHILD! In fact, if they kicked you out, there ARE places that could take you and your baby in. You should NOT lie to him. That is HIS baby and you are taking that away from him. Its not fair to him.


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## xgem27x

rjb said:


> *I don't have a job, and my parents told me a court will sign the rights over to them in a flash because I'm young and have no job or place to go *
> If she finds I've spoken to him I'm in so much trouble :(
> He's supposed to still believe Adelaide isn't his.
> But I don't want it to be that way.
> It just sucks that I have no control. :cry:

You say your parents have told you this, are you sure its not just a threat? You sound very scared of them hun, I don't know your situation, but by what you're saying I get the impression they are very strict and controlling... 

FOB has the right to know the truth that he has a daughter, what do your parents have against him so much? 

I honestly dont believe that the courts would take your daughter away from you, as long as you are being a good mum to her and there is no strong reason why she shouldnt be with you then the courts will keep a child with its mother!

:hugs::hugs: Big hugs, hope this gets sorted easily xxxx


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## rjb

I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
I want to talk to my parents.
But I don't want them to kick me out.
I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
Not either or.
I'm terrified to talk to them :(


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## 17thy

rjb said:


> I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
> I want to talk to my parents.
> But I don't want them to kick me out.
> I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
> Not either or.
> I'm terrified to talk to them :(

Legally, they can't kick you out until you are 18 or they can be charged with neglect.


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## rjb

17thy said:


> rjb said:
> 
> 
> I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
> I want to talk to my parents.
> But I don't want them to kick me out.
> I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
> Not either or.
> I'm terrified to talk to them :(
> 
> Legally, they can't kick you out until you are 18 or they can be charged with neglect.Click to expand...

That's still true even if I've had a child?


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## xgem27x

To start with, I really feel for you because you are really young, and I can't imagine dealing with this when I was 15, so I think you are doing really well :hugs:

I suggest maybe writing how you feel down in a letter, when people read something it goes into their head and they think about it more and actualyl listen to it, whereas if you are talking face to face it could end up with arguments and interupting one another, as they try to make comments without actually listening to what YOU have to say! I've done it before when I had problems with my mum, everytime I tried to talk to her, she wouldnt listen, and we would end up shouting at one another, but then when she read the letter, she thought about what I had said before coming to talk to me, and we actually addressed the problem itself xxxx


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## vinteenage

rjb said:


> 17thy said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> rjb said:
> 
> 
> I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
> I want to talk to my parents.
> But I don't want them to kick me out.
> I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
> Not either or.
> I'm terrified to talk to them :(
> 
> Legally, they can't kick you out until you are 18 or they can be charged with neglect.Click to expand...
> 
> That's still true even if I've had a child?Click to expand...


I don't think so. I think legally once you've had a child you're emancipated and you're parents don't have to house/feed/clothe you anymore, unfortunately.


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## rjb

That's what I thought ^^


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## 17thy

vinteenage said:


> rjb said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 17thy said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> rjb said:
> 
> 
> I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
> I want to talk to my parents.
> But I don't want them to kick me out.
> I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
> Not either or.
> I'm terrified to talk to them :(
> 
> Legally, they can't kick you out until you are 18 or they can be charged with neglect.Click to expand...
> 
> That's still true even if I've had a child?Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I don't think so. I think legally once you've had a child you're emancipated and you're parents don't have to house/feed/clothe you anymore, unfortunately.Click to expand...


No. That is not the case. When you are a minor, you are only MEDICALLY emancipated from your parents during the pregnancy, and for your child. You have the right to make all medical decisions for your child. But you are NOT fully emancipated until you get married, or a judge says so.


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## aafscsweetie

Is living with FOB not an option?? To be honest, your parents sound fucking awful. How can they threaten to take away your baby just because of who you talk to? Like someone else said, it's not your fucking car keys or a later curfew or something. Your daughter should not be a pawn that they can use against you to get what they want. That is absolutely ridiculous.


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## rjb

I could live with him but they said if I do they'll get both of us put in jail and take the baby..


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## vinteenage

rjb said:


> I could live with him but they said if I do they'll get both of us put in jail and take the baby..

Why do you think they can put you in jail? *They have no legal right to your child.* Hell, you're not even old enough for jail, you'd go to a Juvenile Detention Center. Have you done anything to endanger Adelaide? Are you taking drugs or drinking? Are you being abusive towards her or your parents? If the answer to these is no, they cannot put in jail *or* take her away.

Anyway, if you have no other option than to live with your parents you need to assert yourself as Adelaide's mother. Yes, you're young, but that does not change the fact that you carried her for 9 months, gave birth to her, and will be the one she'll turn to. As long as you're not making stupid decisions for her wellbeing, which I don't see you doing at all, there is absolutely no reason for them to making decisions for you and no reason that they'd be able to take her away from you.

Is there really no family you can stay with? Grandparents? Aunt? Uncles? Extended cousins? I've had numerous offers from different family members for me and Finn to stay with them if I need it.

It sounds like your parents are being very controlling and near brain washing. Didn't they tell you to get a c-section as well?

I'm very fearful for you, Becca. This does not sound healthy for you or Adelaide.


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## rainbows_x

Your parents sound extremely overpowering.
I'm not so sure of the laws where you are, but surely they cannot take your child away from you, and put you in jail?

If I was in your position I would be with FOB, living with him and raising your daughter together. It's so unfair of your parents to react like this, it's not fair on you, FOB, or LO. You need to stand up and do what is best for you and your daughter.


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## rjb

Yes they wanted me to get a c section and to not breastfeed. I listened to them because they're my parents and I didn't think it would be bad.
But it's getting to the point where I feel like I have no control in my life.


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## aafscsweetie

vinteenage said:


> rjb said:
> 
> 
> I could live with him but they said if I do they'll get both of us put in jail and take the baby..
> 
> Why do you think they can put you in jail? *They have no legal right to your child.* Hell, you're not even old enough for jail, you'd go to a Juvenile Detention Center. Have you done anything to endanger Adelaide? Are you taking drugs or drinking? Are you being abusive towards her or your parents? If the answer to these is no, they cannot put in jail *or* take her away.
> 
> Anyway, if you have no other option than to live with your parents you need to assert yourself as Adelaide's mother. Yes, you're young, but that does not change the fact that you carried her for 9 months, gave birth to her, and will be the one she'll turn to. As long as you're not making stupid decisions for her wellbeing, which I don't see you doing at all, there is absolutely no reason for them to making decisions for you and no reason that they'd be able to take her away from you.
> 
> Is there really no family you can stay with? Grandparents? Aunt? Uncles? Extended cousins? I've had numerous offers from different family members for me and Finn to stay with them if I need it.
> 
> It sounds like your parents are being very controlling and near brain washing. Didn't they tell you to get a c-section as well?
> 
> I'm very fearful for you, Becca. This does not sound healthy for you or Adelaide.Click to expand...

^^ Exactly WSS. They can't put you in jail, FFS!!! They really do sound like they are brainwashing you. Hun, *you can't just blindly believe everything your parents say.* You need to stand up for yourself and DO THE RESEARCH for yourself- you cannot be put in jail just because your parents don't like the decisions you are making (unless those decisions are illegal obviously, but they aren't).


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## rjb

And I don't know how they could. I don't do any of that, but I'm terrified to cross them and lose her


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## aafscsweetie

You can't lose her, you are her mother. The only way you could lose her is if you were unfit and doing something illegal- which you aren't! Honestly, my only advice is to get as far away from your parents as possible, perhaps by living with FOB.


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## vinteenage

rjb said:


> Yes they wanted me to get a c section and to not breastfeed. I listened to them because they're my parents and I didn't think it would be bad.
> But it's getting to the point where I feel like I have no control in my life.

They told you not to breastfeed? Isn't one of them a pediatrician? Breastfeeding is best, I've never heard of any doctor advising someone not to breastfeed. That's insane. If it doesn't work out or you don't want to that's one thing but telling someone not to? I'm completely disgusted.

Get out of that house and get out now before Adelaide is affected and they're doing the same controlling aspects to her. Parents are not always right. You're a mother, it is time to assert yourself to make the correct choices for you and your daughter.

I'm dead serious Becca. I'm so concerned. I'd call CPS on your parents for you but well, I don't know how exactly that would end up and I don't want you to have to move in with someone else you don't want to, however, your parents sound absolutely brainwashing. Please save yourself.


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## aafscsweetie

Yes, I thought of CPS too but wouldn't do it for those same reasons. I cannot believe that, as a pediatrician, your dad would tell you not to breastfeed. You really need to stand up for yourself. It's not about you anymore, it's about your daughter, and you cannot be a pushover about this.


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## rjb

It's really my mom more than anything. It's always been that way but it's only just now upsetting me because she's my daughter, not my mother's.
I don't know why my mom is the way she is, but I've never known her to be any other way.
And they say they're doing it to protect me in the future.
But I don't see the danger anymore.
He has a job and is stable.
I don't like him missing out on so much is all.


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## forgodssake

Does he want you both to be with him xx


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## rjb

Yes he does.


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## aafscsweetie

Wow, if he is wanting to see his child and be a family, and has a stable job and a stable home environment for your daughter, then what is there to consider? If it was me, I would have been out my parents door and on FOB's doorstep a very long time ago.


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## vinteenage

rjb said:


> Yes he does.

Does he drive? Live locally?

Meet up with him. Take Adelaide. Get together and if things seem okay, and he's acting responsible and you're sure in your gut it would be okay to move in with him...do it.

As long as he's not abusive, it seems like anything would be better than your parents.


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## rjb

He lives an hour and a half away. He knows how to drive but doesn't have his license. His mom or sister could drive him but if I went with him my parents would probably call the police claiming I ran away (which I assume is what theyd get me arrested for) I don't know :(
I feel like I have no options


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## vinteenage

rjb said:


> He lives an hour and a half away. He knows how to drive but doesn't have his license. His mom or sister could drive him but if I went with him my parents would probably call the police claiming I ran away (which I assume is what theyd get me arrested for) I don't know :(
> I feel like I have no options

You cannot be arrested for running away and since you're technically emaciated, it wouldn't even matter. They can't do anything except report you as a "missing person" but well, the police won't even file that until several days after you've left, and Im assuming you wouldn't suddenly leave for days on the first visit.


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## 17thy

https://www.divorcelawinfo.com/states/ga/gacustody.htm

I hope that you know that your parents making you keep him being the father a secret is AGAINST THE LAW. Since you aren't even old enough to consent to sex and all. Its against the law for them to withhold the information that Adelaide is his daughter.


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## 17thy

How old is the FOB? If he is not a minor, HE can be arrested if you run away to him. You are NOT emancipated. Your parents can call you in as a runaway with your daughter. But you CAN leave your daughter with him and his parents since you both have the same amount of rights to her and there is NOTHING your parents can do.


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## rjb

I told him she is, which is why I'm in so much trouble


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## aafscsweetie

Becca, I know you cannot afford a lawyer, but many lawyers do cases pro-bono (for free, basically out of the goodness of their hearts) and your situation definitely seems like a good candidate for that. I just can't believe all of this and my heart breaks for you.


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## rjb

17thy said:


> How old is the FOB? If he is not a minor, HE can be arrested if you run away to him. You are NOT emancipated. Your parents can call you in as a runaway with your daughter. But you CAN leave your daughter with him and his parents since you both have the same amount of rights to her and there is NOTHING your parents can do.

He's 17.
I don't want to leave my daughter anywhere.
She's my daughter too...


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## aafscsweetie

I'm not sure whether having a child makes you emancipated from your parents, but if it doesn't and you want to live with FOB, you can file for emancipation from your parents and pretty much any judge would give it to you since you have a baby of your own.


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## rjb

aafscsweetie said:


> Becca, I know you cannot afford a lawyer, but many lawyers do cases pro-bono (for free, basically out of the goodness of their hearts) and your situation definitely seems like a good candidate for that. I just can't believe all of this and my heart breaks for you.

It's killing me because I do love my parents and my sisters and brother as well. But they're making me choose between two families and it doesn't seem right.


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## aafscsweetie

I know it is complicated because you love them, but how can you accept them putting you in this position?? Would you ever do that to Hudson??


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## rjb

No. But they're my parents. I can't not love them. :(


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## aafscsweetie

Of course not, I totally understand that. 

A little information about becoming emancipated: https://www1.legis.ga.gov/legis/2005_06/fulltext/hb847.htm

Apparently you cannot usually become emancipated until you are 16, but they make "an exception to such age requirement in the case of pregnancy or live birth"


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## 17thy

Idk about Georgia, but in Florida, you can only become emancipated at age 16-17 and only after you have had a steady job for a year. And aafscsweetie is right. There are a lot of lawyers that will work for free. That way, you can have written guidelines, and your parents can't do anything about it, AND you don't have to choose between families. 


But in my honest opinion. Your family now is Adelaide and the FOB, whether or not its a good situation.


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## rjb

This is all making me feel horribly sick.
And like I'm an awful daughter and an awful mother.
:(


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## Gwizz

hun this is so sad to read - please listen to the girls and go stay with FOB. 

However much your parents say they are doing it in your best interests they would have sat you down and listened to you in the first place - they clearly haven't. They are unhealthy and sooner or later Adelaide will pick up on the atmosphere. You need to really be strong and take some time out from your parents and think how YOU want to raise YOUR child

:hugs:


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## x__amour

Ah, Rebecca.
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Emancipation is a really, really, really hard thing to do, almost none of the cases are even granted to court let alone won. It has to because extreme things are happening, being abused, neglected, etc. Adelaide will probably aide you but I'm not sure. I haven't taken the time to read throughout this entire thread but just know your parents could never take Adelaide away from you, you are far from an unfit mother, sweetheart. Like Brandi said, you definitely can't just leave, the cops'll be onto you in a second. But you can leave Adelaide with your FOB if you feel comfortable with that, it is *YOUR CHILD*. This is so hard, I'm not sure what to say honestly, I'm just trying to give you some comforting words... Do you get out often? I know this sounds horrible but if you truly and honestly want to see FOB, have a friend arrange a meeting or something? But this honest to God has to be for the best for Adelaide and yourself, honey. It can't be just because... I've never been in your situation at all but I hope I've helped... Stay strong, 'kay? We're all here for you... It'll all work out in the end... 
:hugs:


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## Gwizz

rjb said:


> This is all making me feel horribly sick.
> And like I'm an awful daughter and an awful mother.
> :(

Your not :hugs:

At the end of the day your responsibilities are to your daughter and your parents have to take a back seat in your life if they are being unreasonable and controlling to you. By becoming a mother (at whatever age) priorities change. Don't concern yourself with how u are as a daughter, thats them controlling you to a certain extent. 

You sound like u could have a lovely little happy family with FOB and i think you should start planning it :D

x


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## rjb

I've done everything they've told me to in terms of working hard in school so I can go to college and everything.
That makes sense to me, so that I can give Adelaide the best possible future.
But keeping her away from her father if he's stable makes no sense to me..


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## rjb

@Shannon,
I haven't gone out without my parents in years.
They won't allow it.
Certainly not now.

But everyone is certainly making me feel better. 
I just want all this to work out


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## aafscsweetie

Wow, becca, the more you say about your parents, the more awful it gets. Why won't they let you go out without them? Actually, that has to be an exaggeration, right, because you got pregnant. And I can't imagine that happening with them in the room- haha!! 

Anyway, this is no laughing matter, I really feel so sorry for you and I just wish there was something I could do to help you :(


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## fantastica

It is a sad situation, but there are things you could try - there have been good suggestions in this thread, write your parents a letter, talk to them about him maybe coming over for short visits (30mins even) which they could help supervise etc.

Is there a real reason they don't like him? I'm sure I saw you write something about him taking drugs etc? sorry if I got it wrong. But if that is the case, then maybe they are just worried? People can change though, but you'll need to work with them.

They cannot take your daughter so don't even waste time and energy worrying about it. 

It might be difficult, but you need to take a mature step in working it out, not just doing what your parents tell you to do, you're a mother now and you need to stick up for yourself and your daughter. xx


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## rjb

aafscsweetie said:


> Wow, becca, the more you say about your parents, the more awful it gets. Why won't they let you go out without them? Actually, that has to be an exaggeration, right, because you got pregnant. And I can't imagine that happening with them in the room- haha!!
> 
> Anyway, this is no laughing matter, I really feel so sorry for you and I just wish there was something I could do to help you :(

He came to my house in the middle of tge night and I snuck him in.
I know that's awful but it was the only I could see him.
I've only seen him at night ever.
But idk why. It's just how its been


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## x__amour

rjb said:


> @Shannon,
> I haven't gone out without my parents in years.
> They won't allow it.
> Certainly not now.
> 
> But everyone is certainly making me feel better.
> I just want all this to work out

Oh, Rebecca... :nope: :hugs:
I'm so sorry...


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## Gwizz

I agree with fantastica, 

I know your young hun but you took the step to becoming a mother in the first place so please start to stick up for yourself for the sake of ur little one

x


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## rjb

It's alright. I'm used to it, I just want for Adelaide to have a family..


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## rainbows_x

:hugs:


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## rjb

I'm going to talk to them when my dad gets home.
We'll see how that goes and I guess I'll decide from there. :/


----------



## x__amour

rjb said:


> It's alright. I'm used to it, I just want for Adelaide to have a family..

She does! She has a fantastic mom! :hugs:


----------



## Gwizz

:hugs:


----------



## aafscsweetie

:hugs: you are a great mother and adelaide loves you so much. just hang in there. i hope the talk goes well.


----------



## 17thy

We've given you all the advice we can, but we can't physically make decisions for you. If you want your daughter to be around your father, that is up to you. No matter what you are thinking. What is physically stopping you from calling your FOB and telling him to have someone come pick you up? Nothing. Its all because your parents "won't allow it".


Well... as a parent yourself. Do not Allow _your_ daughter to grow up without her father.


----------



## rjb

17thy said:


> We've given you all the advice we can, but we can't physically make decisions for you. If you want your daughter to be around your father, that is up to you. No matter what you are thinking. What is physically stopping you from calling your FOB and telling him to have someone come pick you up? Nothing. Its all because your parents "won't allow it".
> 
> 
> Well... as a parent yourself. Do not Allow _your_ daughter to grow up without her father.

My parents took my phone.


----------



## rjb

Also he can't legally drive, and if he showed up my parents would call the police


----------



## vinteenage

Oh dear lord Becca, your parents are making me livid.


----------



## fantastica

You need to take some control back hun, they need to realise you are a mum now, can't you go out in the day? Do you have any friends that you can see? 

In the US can you get like legal aid for free if you literally have nothing?? Maybe it's something to consider, I don't know if i'd suggest just upping and moving in with FOB...as you can't know each other really well just yet, but you need to take your life back for you and your daughter, and they can't just get away with this. I know they're your parents and they are probably trying to protect you, but they'll end up pushing you away, this can't be the life you want for YOUR daugher. Stay strong, remember they really can't do anything hun, they have NO power over you xx


----------



## rjb

They don't let me go out even just with friends because they know I'll try to see him.
Plus none of my friends can drive so even if I were going to go against them I couldn't.
But to be honest other than when I snuck in my FOB I've never gone against them.


----------



## fantastica

Are there busses where you are?
They really can't just keep you and your LO housebound, and isolate you from everyone (not even just FOB). I really hope your chat goes well with them, or otherwise would seriously suggest getting legal help, your lives are going to be awful hun...it's different if you're still just 'you' but as a mum this will end up driving you mad, they'll try and influence everything you do with your daughter, it must be so hard for you xx


----------



## aafscsweetie

This is obviously a really tough situation because of your age :( I so wish you were just 18 so you could tell them to fuck off and you could do what you want to do. :( There has to be something that can be done. I really hope you can talk to your parents and just reach some kind of middle ground, like maybe supervised visits (by them) where your FOB comes over and can see Hudson.


----------



## rjb

aafscsweetie said:


> This is obviously a really tough situation because of your age :( I so wish you were just 18 so you could tell them to fuck off and you could do what you want to do. :( There has to be something that can be done. I really hope you can talk to your parents and just reach some kind of middle ground, like maybe supervised visits (by them) where your FOB comes over and can see Hudson.

I would be perfectly happy with that.
But my parents are sort of extremists, so it seems unlikely that they'd allow it.
But maybe. That would actually be fantastic..


----------



## rjb

No, no busses either


----------



## aafscsweetie

Well, legally, FOB has a right to see his baby (unsupervised!), so maybe you could tell your parents that if they don't let even the supervised visits occur, then he could get a judge to legally force your parents to allow him to see the baby (which isn't a bad idea- if you get the chance to talk to him ever again anytime soon, I would suggest that). Do FOB's parents know that he has a daughter? What do they think about the situation?


----------



## rjb

I might tell him that. I wanted to avoid that, but it may have to happen.
His mom knows, but to be honest idk how she feels. She kinda stays outta his life
(talk about opposite ends of the spectrum)


----------



## fantastica

^^ That could be an option, get FOB to go in for access etc., they can't stop it...especially if when it comes to court (or however it works over there) you say you're happy for him to have it too xx


----------



## Gwizz

Thats a good idea :thumbup:

xxxx


----------



## aafscsweetie

yeah, getting FOB to pursue legal action is really the only way this will ever get better, I think. I'm sure he's not on the birth certificate since your parents didn't want him to know, but a simple DNA test would prove it, and the DNA test would be court ordered, so it would be illegal for your parents not to allow it to happen! i really hope it all gets sorted out becca... I can't even imagine :(


----------



## rjb

I doubt my parents will ever forgive me for this :/
I just hope they don't make life hell for me because of it.


----------



## aafscsweetie

Just prove them wrong in life, hun. I know they think that you having a baby at 15 ruined your life, but when you look at adelaide's beautiful face, what is there to really be sorry for? She is beautiful, regardless of how old you were when you had her. She is innocent and should not be punished for what your parent's think was a mistake on your part. Like I said, just prove them wrong. Continue to do well in school and go on to college and graduate. Give adelaide the best life you can :) You are a great mommy and your age has nothing to do with that. xxx


----------



## jenniferannex

oh hun :hugs: what an awful situation. you definatly need to get some control back like the girls have said, yes your young at 15, but your a mother now. your parents are being really unreasonable about the FOB, how can they stop him from seeing his child :nope: its just wrong. 
i really hope you can sort things out hun :hugs: and you arnt a rubbish mother, you sound like your doing whats best for Adelaide, your a brilliant mum. :flower: xx


----------



## x__amour

Do what makes you happy, Rebecca. Do what is best for you and your little girl and everything will work out in the end! 
:hugs:


----------



## AriannasMama

Do whats right for *you and your little girl* now. If what that is doesn't make your parents happy then screw them. No one is perfect and you shouldn't have to try this hard to make them happy. If FOB is stable and a good guy now then he should be able to see his daughter, I can't believe your parents don't want their granddaughter to have a father. :nope:


----------



## annawrigley

17thy said:


> Okay, I'm confused. You said in another post that your parents decided what to call your daughter, and now you're saying she'd take your daughter away for talking to your daughters father. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
> 
> This may be harsh. But you need to grow up. YOUR MOTHER CANNOT LEGALLY TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER FROM YOU. If she even tries to withhold your daughter from you, you can call the police. Quit letting her have that much control over you and YOUR child. Its seriously sickening. You can talk to the father if you want. Even if he used to be a douchebag. He IS the father. Seriously!
> 
> I hope you really take advice.




17thy said:


> We've given you all the advice we can, but we can't physically make decisions for you. If you want your daughter to be around your father, that is up to you. No matter what you are thinking. What is physically stopping you from calling your FOB and telling him to have someone come pick you up? Nothing. Its all because your parents "won't allow it".
> 
> 
> Well... as a parent yourself. Do not Allow _your_ daughter to grow up without her father.

Why are you so rude? A little tact wouldnt go amiss especially as the OP is obviously very frightened and in a horrible situation.


----------



## jenniferannex

annawrigley said:


> 17thy said:
> 
> 
> Okay, I'm confused. You said in another post that your parents decided what to call your daughter, and now you're saying she'd take your daughter away for talking to your daughters father. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
> 
> This may be harsh. But you need to grow up. YOUR MOTHER CANNOT LEGALLY TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER FROM YOU. If she even tries to withhold your daughter from you, you can call the police. Quit letting her have that much control over you and YOUR child. Its seriously sickening. You can talk to the father if you want. Even if he used to be a douchebag. He IS the father. Seriously!
> 
> I hope you really take advice.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 17thy said:
> 
> 
> We've given you all the advice we can, but we can't physically make decisions for you. If you want your daughter to be around your father, that is up to you. No matter what you are thinking. What is physically stopping you from calling your FOB and telling him to have someone come pick you up? Nothing. Its all because your parents "won't allow it".
> 
> Well... as a parent yourself. Do not Allow _your_ daughter to grow up without her father.Click to expand...
> 
> Why are you so rude? A little tact wouldnt go amiss especially as the OP is obviously very frightened and in a horrible situation.Click to expand...

Wss ^ the thing is no one knows what we would do in that situation. It's easy to say do this do that, but when your the one that's in it, it's not that easy. 
Like Anna said she's scared and needs support. At the end of the day they are her parents, she loves them. Like we all do. If she just shouts all the odds she could end up having no home etc, she doesbt want to fall out with them abd the problem is shes trying to keep everyone happy, think you need to see what she's going through with abit of sensitivity.


----------



## annawrigley

Hun my heart really goes out to you, what an awful situation to be in. I had a quick google on the laws in Georgia and whether your parents would actually be able to take your daughter from you, but I didn't find much. I hope its not true though? It sounds very unrealistic to me but then again, I don't know what the law is like there. Is there anywhere you can get free legal advice? I really do feel for you, I don't know what to suggest. I'm scared for you tbh, and I'm sorry to say this because I know you love them but your parents sound like horrible people (or your mother at least, since you said it's mainly her). They are treating you like a 6 year old, yes you are young but you are not a baby. And you are a MOTHER! They cant order you around your whole life. I hate that they are doing this to you, its so unfair, and its clear how unhappy all of this is making you. I just wanna help you out of there! Its a really unhealthy atmosphere for you and your daughter to be in :( They cant control your every move!! :nope: Its ridiculous. I dont know if you realise but your parents are actually emotionally abusing you by bullying you and threatening you with taking your daughter away. 

The only thing I can relate it to, and I know my situation is totally different so please don't think I'm trying to say I know what you're going through, is when Noah was first born and I came home from the hospital and went to my mum's house. FOB came to visit which she wasn't happy with, so I went to my flat where my dad was (he owned it), he also wasnt happy that FOB was there so i ended up going to FOB's house for a few days and fell out with both my parents. It was awful, even though I think they were in the wrong disapproving of FOB seeing his newborn child, I hated upsetting them. It only lasted a few days but it was terrible so i cant imagine you going through it on a day to day basis.

I dont know what else to say, I hope you can find a way out because its really not healthy you staying there :hugs::hugs::hugs: xxx


----------



## 17thy

annawrigley said:


> 17thy said:
> 
> 
> Okay, I'm confused. You said in another post that your parents decided what to call your daughter, and now you're saying she'd take your daughter away for talking to your daughters father. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
> 
> This may be harsh. But you need to grow up. YOUR MOTHER CANNOT LEGALLY TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER FROM YOU. If she even tries to withhold your daughter from you, you can call the police. Quit letting her have that much control over you and YOUR child. Its seriously sickening. You can talk to the father if you want. Even if he used to be a douchebag. He IS the father. Seriously!
> 
> I hope you really take advice.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 17thy said:
> 
> 
> We've given you all the advice we can, but we can't physically make decisions for you. If you want your daughter to be around your father, that is up to you. No matter what you are thinking. What is physically stopping you from calling your FOB and telling him to have someone come pick you up? Nothing. Its all because your parents "won't allow it".
> 
> 
> Well... as a parent yourself. Do not Allow _your_ daughter to grow up without her father.Click to expand...
> 
> Why are you so rude? A little tact wouldnt go amiss especially as the OP is obviously very frightened and in a horrible situation.Click to expand...

Like I said, what I said was going to be harsh, but I'm not going to sugar coat it. She needs to do what she needs to do. And if I was in this situation (which I wouldn't be in the first place because my personality isn't as meek as hers and there is nothing wrong with being meek) but I would tell my mother to straight up f*ck off if she thought she was going to stop me from letting MY daughter see her father. I would walk RIGHT out that door and wave goodbye. If her mother is showing that much disrespect to her, then why should she show any respect to her mother? 

I too have been in a similar situation. But with my dad instead of my mom. My dad never let me go anywhere, do anything. I NEVER went against my father, I always did what he asked, stayed with him, etc... When I got pregnant, I left him a note while he was at work, packed my bags and LEFT with my boyfriend. LEFT. He called the cops on us (because my boyfriend was already an adult and I was still a minor) and we broke out some money and got married a week later. 

And you know what? My father was SO mad. He cussed me out the night before my wedding. But he GOT OVER IT. And I'm sure your parents would too rjb.


So anna, please don't act like I have no idea what I'm talking about.


----------



## jenniferannex

17thy said:


> annawrigley said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 17thy said:
> 
> 
> Okay, I'm confused. You said in another post that your parents decided what to call your daughter, and now you're saying she'd take your daughter away for talking to your daughters father. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
> 
> This may be harsh. But you need to grow up. YOUR MOTHER CANNOT LEGALLY TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER FROM YOU. If she even tries to withhold your daughter from you, you can call the police. Quit letting her have that much control over you and YOUR child. Its seriously sickening. You can talk to the father if you want. Even if he used to be a douchebag. He IS the father. Seriously!
> 
> I hope you really take advice.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 17thy said:
> 
> 
> We've given you all the advice we can, but we can't physically make decisions for you. If you want your daughter to be around your father, that is up to you. No matter what you are thinking. What is physically stopping you from calling your FOB and telling him to have someone come pick you up? Nothing. Its all because your parents "won't allow it".
> 
> 
> Well... as a parent yourself. Do not Allow _your_ daughter to grow up without her father.Click to expand...
> 
> Why are you so rude? A little tact wouldnt go amiss especially as the OP is obviously very frightened and in a horrible situation.Click to expand...
> 
> Like I said, what I said was going to be harsh, but I'm not going to sugar coat it. She needs to do what she needs to do. And if I was in this situation (which I wouldn't be in the first place because my personality isn't as meek as hers and there is nothing wrong with being meek) *but I would tell my mother to straight up f*ck off if she thought she was going to stop me from letting MY daughter see her father.* I would walk RIGHT out that door and wave goodbye. If her mother is showing that much disrespect to her, then why should she show any respect to her mother?
> 
> I too have been in a similar situation. But with my dad instead of my mom. My dad never let me go anywhere, do anything. I NEVER went against my father, I always did what he asked, stayed with him, etc... When I got pregnant, I left him a note while he was at work, packed my bags and LEFT with my boyfriend. LEFT. He called the cops on us (because my boyfriend was already an adult and I was still a minor) and we broke out some money and got married a week later.
> 
> And you know what? My father was SO mad. He cussed me out the night before my wedding. But he GOT OVER IT. And I'm sure your parents would too rjb.
> 
> 
> So anna, please don't act like I have no idea what I'm talking about.Click to expand...

she is 15, she lives with her parents, she has no money, no job, no where to go if shes kicked out, where would you expect her to go with a baby :wacko: and maybe she has abit of respect for her mum? telling her mother to f**k off is the completely wrong way of doing it. she doesn't want to fall out with them. 

That is not the way to resolve this, im sure you wouldn't like your child to tell you to f**k off, that was just useless advice to give, and completely the wrong way for becca to do this. :dohh: yeh she wants FOB to see hudson, but she obviously wants hudson to see her granma and grandad, whats the point of gaining FOB just to lose grandparents :wacko:


----------



## rjb

I really appreciate everyone helping me through this.
I'm building up the courage to talk to them. So maybe at dinner tonight.
:/ 
Wish my FOB could be here to support me :(


----------



## fantastica

Hope it goes ok, stay strong hun, it might be scary but it'll be worth it in the end, let us know how you get on xx


----------



## annawrigley

Well, 17thy, since we're going with that patronising tone...
How can you say you wouldnt be in that situation? What an ignorant thing to say. Like she chose to be in this situation :dohh: Maybe if you had lived your whole life in fear of your parents and them having total control over you, you would have no choice but to be 'meek'.

And i'm not sure running away and getting married at 17 to make a point is the greatest display of maturity or the greatest advice to be giving someone... Maybe he did 'GET OVER IT', thats not to say rjb's parents would. And she wants to maintain a relationship with them, she has this thing called respect for them which most people tend to have for their parents...


----------



## Rhio92

annawrigley said:


> Well, 17thy, since we're going with that patronising tone...
> How can you say you wouldnt be in that situation? What an ignorant thing to say. Like she chose to be in this situation :dohh: Maybe if you had lived your whole life in fear of your parents and them having total control over you, you would have no choice but to be 'meek'.
> 
> *And i'm not sure running away and getting married at 17 to make a point is the greatest display of maturity* or the greatest advice to be giving someone... Maybe he did 'GET OVER IT', thats not to say rjb's parents would. And she wants to maintain a relationship with them, she has this thing called respect for them which most people tend to have for their parents...

I agree... running away makes you look _very_ immature. Trust me, I was a runaway teen, and no one takes runaway teens seriously (unless you're escaping something like violence). 

rjb, I've just read the entire thread and don't know what to say sorry :hugs: Don't listen to anyway being patronising, we can't imagine what it's like to be you right now :hugs: Stay strong hun, we're all here for you, do what you think is best, and we'll back you all the way xxx


----------



## rjb

it's all over and done now.
i can't talk to him anymore or they'll take custody.
that's it.


----------



## AriannasMama

Hon, they can't take custody just because you are talking to FOB. They can tell you those lies all they want but unless you are an unfit mother they CANNOT take Adelaide from you. Wanting her father in her life doesn't make you unfit, if he is a good guy now then its the right thing to do, especially if he wants to be around.


----------



## aafscsweetie

Yes, hun, like we've all said before, they can't take custody JUST because you are talking to your FOB. They really can't. Think about it- In court, a judge would ask why your parents thought you were unfit to take care of your daughter, like if you were doing anything illegal or were violent/unstable- which you're not!! :( :hugs:


----------



## rjb

they said the court will look at it as letting an unstable person in her life and will award them custody


----------



## xforuiholdonx

**Breathes very deeply.**
Your parents are a bunch of assholes.
FOB needs to get the court system involved. immediately. 
Its not right. Nor is it fair. You need to do a little research on the computer and see if there is a family shelter around that will help you get on your feet. You cannot live in fear of losing your child bc your parents try to control you. That is NOT healthy for you, or for her.


----------



## x__amour

:dohh:
Fuckfuckfuck. What the fuck!
No, no! Becca, your parents *can't* take custody of Adelaide! Damn, this infuriates me so much, it's breaking my heart to see you like this! They can't treat you like this, they are mentally abusing you! Trying to threaten you and push you around, dangling custody over your head, it's so *WRONG*! They shouldn't be controlling who you talk to, where you go, it's sickening they won't even let you out of the house without them, it must be so suffocating! I never, ever try to tell people how to parent but this is just crossing the line. I can't even imagine how you feel right now. Shit. They won't even listen to you, which is awful. Families are supposed to have communication skills. Damnit. I feel so helpless, I don't know what to do or what to say for you. My heart just breaks for you...
:nope:


----------



## newmommy23

hun it's actually illegal for them to not allow you to tell the babies father. he has rights as a paternal parent. If they were to take you to court they would lose. You aren't an unfit parent and its pretty damn hard to take a baby from its mother otherwise. They would honestly make themselves look a fool in court.


----------



## faolan5109

Reguardless of what they say they can take you child. They cant, and the FOB needs to get the court involved so he can see his child. Its not there baby man and they have no say. Nothing they can do about it. Tell him to go the court for custody.

Hope it all works out.


----------



## rainbows_x

Hope the talk went well. x


----------



## rjb

i told him to go to court for rights because until he did there was nothing i could do.
i really hope he gets them, because this is killing me.


----------



## rjb

there's just nothing i can do to get us out of here.
i have nowhere to go, and my parents said if i walked out the door with her i would never get custody back.
her father can't come get her because he currently has no rights to her (he's not on the bc)
there's really nothing i can do.
my parents made that very clear last night.


----------



## vinteenage

I'm with Shannon, Becca this is just heart breaking. 

Getting him to get court ordered rights is a very good step in the right direction! I hope he takes action.


----------



## Abz1982

How does it work with local calls in teh US? Is there no one local enough who could maybe call up a laywer - or the local police - and ask them if what the parents are saying is true?


----------



## rjb

Abz1982 said:


> How does it work with local calls in teh US? Is there no one local enough who could maybe call up a laywer - or the local police - and ask them if what the parents are saying is true?

i'm not sure what the means tbh


----------



## vinteenage

rjb said:


> there's just nothing i can do to get us out of here.
> *i have nowhere to go, and my parents said if i walked out the door with her i would never get custody back.*
> her father can't come get her because he currently has no rights to her (he's not on the bc)
> there's really nothing i can do.
> my parents made that very clear last night.

Becca your parents are so full of shit. The bolded? Absolutely not true as far as what I can tell. I've been looking things up all morning. You are the only one who has legal rights to your child right now.

_Stop believe everything they say_. You obviously have access to a computer, look things up yourself. 

Can you add the FOB on Facebook? Email him? Something? Do that. Tell him to look into legal action, tell him to serve you papers, you'll then be required to attend court and your parents can't stop it, tell him to pursue a court mandated paternity test. It may be a total pain for him to do but hopefully he cares enough about Adelaide to do it.


----------



## rjb

vinteenage said:


> rjb said:
> 
> 
> there's just nothing i can do to get us out of here.
> *i have nowhere to go, and my parents said if i walked out the door with her i would never get custody back.*
> her father can't come get her because he currently has no rights to her (he's not on the bc)
> there's really nothing i can do.
> my parents made that very clear last night.
> 
> Becca your parents are so full of shit. The bolded? Absolutely not true as far as what I can tell. I've been looking things up all morning. You are the only one who has legal rights to your child right now.
> 
> _Stop believe everything they say_. You obviously have access to a computer, look things up yourself.
> 
> Can you add the FOB on Facebook? Email him? Something? Do that. Tell him to look into legal action, tell him to serve you papers, you'll then be required to attend court and your parents can't stop it, tell him to pursue a court mandated paternity test. It may be a total pain for him to do but hopefully he cares enough about Adelaide to do it.Click to expand...

that's what i've told him to do, and no i can't add him as my parents monitor everything i do/say on the computer
but i did tell him to that and i'm sure he will.
tbh, i have no idea where to start looking, as my parents say they've already spoken to the court and the court said my parents might be able to.
it's really just fucked up, and i'm not going to forgive them for this.


----------



## vinteenage

rjb said:


> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> rjb said:
> 
> 
> there's just nothing i can do to get us out of here.
> *i have nowhere to go, and my parents said if i walked out the door with her i would never get custody back.*
> her father can't come get her because he currently has no rights to her (he's not on the bc)
> there's really nothing i can do.
> my parents made that very clear last night.
> 
> Becca your parents are so full of shit. The bolded? Absolutely not true as far as what I can tell. I've been looking things up all morning. You are the only one who has legal rights to your child right now.
> 
> _Stop believe everything they say_. You obviously have access to a computer, look things up yourself.
> 
> Can you add the FOB on Facebook? Email him? Something? Do that. Tell him to look into legal action, tell him to serve you papers, you'll then be required to attend court and your parents can't stop it, tell him to pursue a court mandated paternity test. It may be a total pain for him to do but hopefully he cares enough about Adelaide to do it.Click to expand...
> 
> that's what i've told him to do, and no i can't add him as my parents monitor everything i do/say on the computer
> but i did tell him to that and i'm sure he will.
> tbh, i have no idea where to start looking, as my parents say they've already spoken to the court and the court said my parents might be able to.
> it's really just fucked up, and i'm not going to forgive them for this.Click to expand...

How do you know they spoke to the court?

This is such bullshit Becca, I'm so mad on your behalf.

However, they must not monitor too closely or they wouldn't they know you're posting on here?


----------



## birdiex

Sorry to butt in, but I've been stalking the thread and do you realise you could just change your facebook password and delete the pages where you added him in the history of your browser? Or he could set up an account under another name and you could clear the chat history when you speak to him, so that your parents cannot find out or see either who he is or what he's written :thumbup:


----------



## rjb

they can read what i post on here.
i just don't care if they do anymore.
they deserve to see how much this hurts me.
and it's a program that takes a snapshot of the screen every 1-5 minutes, so there's really no way around it.


----------



## vinteenage

rjb said:


> they can read what i post on here.
> i just don't care if they do anymore.
> they deserve to see how much this hurts me.
> and it's a program that takes a snapshot of the screen every 1-5 minutes, so there's really no way around it.


That is so sickening. So, so, so sickening. 

Dear Becca's parents,
Really? Why are you doing this? I understand you are trying to protect your daughter and granddaughter but you may very well end up injuring both of them in the long run. It will most likely lead to more sneaking and deception. Please help your daughter help herself instead of causing her pain and resentment.
- Daphne


----------



## rjb

they honestly think what they're doing is best.
i cant imagine how though


----------



## Marzipan_girl

I just read this through....I don't even know what to say....
:cry:
Your parents are fucking nuts. But if they're reading this, i'm sure they don't care. They must think they're parents of the year.... 
I'm so sorry sweetie...apart from what everyone else has said, I don't have any advice. :cry: I pray they start to listen to you...


----------



## vinteenage

rjb said:


> they honestly think what they're doing is best.
> i cant imagine how though

Did you sneak around a lot before Adelaide was born?

I have/had a friend who sneaked around a ton. I mean like, daily, would lie to her parents about where she was, where she was spending the night, etc. On more than one occasion I believed she was putting herself in a dangerous situation and seriously considered calling her parents and telling them. I never did though. Her parents were Jehovah's Witnesses and strict, but not unreasonably so at all and she felt a need to "act out". Her parents never caught on. :nope:

Could your parents think you're trying to sneak around? Or have reason to believe you did in the past?

This doesn't justify their actions but it explains them. They do need to take into consideration now that you are someone's mother and while you may need _help_ making some decisions, that does not mean they get to _decide_ for you. I fully believe is it necessary to at least give FOB an opportunity to be in Adelaide's life. 

Don't you have an older sister? Could you speak to her? Explain to her? Surely she can't completely side with your parents.


----------



## Lauraxamy

:hugs: Honestly why would your parents want to seperate a mother and baby, it's awful. I really hope they sort their heads out and realise they just can't control you or your baby nor can they take her, it's so, so wrong. Hope you all find a way to sort it out.


----------



## zoe6660

i dont know the laws and stuff out there but here is one option out of the few, this one is the hardest one...
stay with your parents, u have to grow up coz ur a mother and finish school and college get a job get out, and the end of this you dont have to see speak to your mother or father again, if they going to treat u like this, use them, take advantaged of them and they house, let them help you with your child, but set rules for them like they have for you, u can only make things happen if u do something about it.
i belive no one can take your child away from you unless u hand it over (no sure if this is right) or ur not looking after her.
fuck them and take advantaged i know this is going to be hard VERY hard but it will be hard when u on your own at 15 rising a child.
i wish u the best.
p.s i dont have a child but i moved out at a young age and back home now and my parents can be dicks sometimes with me but i tell them how it is and at the end of the day i help and do them favours and if they slip up they wont see me again and thats they fault.
let your family know if they not going to support you now dont bother once u gone to contact you.
my fiance auntie said "when u have a child u have to do everything in your power to support and care for this it isnt for a few months its for life time." and this is true no way when i have children they grow up are going to be treated like that, as humans we can communicate and work things out and no matter how my future child do with they life i will alway be here and guide them to do the right.


----------



## aafscsweetie

Jesus christ, I can't believe your parents, Becca!! It is seriously like being in a cult- they have completely brainwashed you into thinking that this is ok, when it is CLEARLY not!!! FOB absolutely MUST start a custody/paternity battle. He has to!! He has every right to his daughter. I cannot believe this.

Becca, do a little roleplay with me and just try to realize how ridiculous of a claim this is:

Lawyer: Mr and Mrs "Becca", why do you feel your daughter is an unfit mother? Has she done anything illegal?
Parents: Uh... no... nothing illegal.
Lawyer: No drugs?
Parents: No.
Lawyer: No abuse?
Parents: No.
Lawyer: ...

Becca, they literally have nothing that they can say about you! No judge will just give custody to someone else just for shits and giggles. You are her mother and that cannot be taken away. Ahhhhh I am so frustrated. I hope your FOB is really serious about pursuing legal action.


----------



## rjb

vinteenage said:


> rjb said:
> 
> 
> they honestly think what they're doing is best.
> i cant imagine how though
> 
> Did you sneak around a lot before Adelaide was born?
> 
> I have/had a friend who sneaked around a ton. I mean like, daily, would lie to her parents about where she was, where she was spending the night, etc. On more than one occasion I believed she was putting herself in a dangerous situation and seriously considered calling her parents and telling them. I never did though. Her parents were Jehovah's Witnesses and strict, but not unreasonably so at all and she felt a need to "act out". Her parents never caught on. :nope:
> 
> Could your parents think you're trying to sneak around? Or have reason to believe you did in the past?
> 
> This doesn't justify their actions but it explains them. They do need to take into consideration now that you are someone's mother and while you may need _help_ making some decisions, that does not mean they get to _decide_ for you. I fully believe is it necessary to at least give FOB an opportunity to be in Adelaide's life.
> 
> Don't you have an older sister? Could you speak to her? Explain to her? Surely she can't completely side with your parents.Click to expand...

She's totally on my parents side actually.
maybe even more so.
i didn't sneak around a lot, but i admit i did some.
but no i definitely never lied about where i was or who i was with.
i just snuck around some.
i don't think that the monitoring is completely unjustified.
i just couldn't sneak around lol


----------



## x__amour

Kayla, I'm sure they're thinking. "But nooo! She slept with the boy she loved and conceived a beautiful child and is a wonderful mother that takes care of her! It's just SOOO awful that she HAS to have her taken away because she wants the FATHER of her BABY to SEE her BABY! Can you believe it?! Grant custody to us!"

:dohh:


----------



## Rhio92

OMG Becca, we've never really 'spoke' before, but this thread is making me really sad :hugs: I want to kidnap you and FOB myselg and you can come live with me away from it all! :haha:
Seriously though, you deserve so so so much better than what you're getting... Can't your parents see what damage they're doing??? xxx


----------



## rubixcyoob.

Becca, I know I don't know you personally, but the things I want to say about them and their shit will get me banned most likely ...

I am studying law in Scotland, I know the basics. Give me your email address, I'll ask my family law professor who also teaches in the USA what the score is, get a proper, legal email sent to you and you can ram it up your parents arses until they get paper cuts.

I'm being serious though, give me an email address and I will get advice from her, do my own research and you can take control of your life.

People like your parents and their actions are the reason I want to do pro bono family law.


----------



## hurryupsept

ive been following this thread, and didnt want to read and run. i dont have any legal advice for you, but like all other girls on here i want to make it clear, that they CANNOT take YOUR daughter away from you! ... try and take all the advice being given cause these girls are all talking sense ... this situation is awful and heart breaking, i hope things work out for you and your LO and soon! :flower: :hugs:


----------



## aafscsweetie

I hope that you believe the 15 or so people on this thread that have told you that they cannot take your daughter away :(


----------



## rjb

rubixcyoob. said:


> Becca, I know I don't know you personally, but the things I want to say about them and their shit will get me banned most likely ...
> 
> I am studying law in Scotland, I know the basics. Give me your email address, I'll ask my family law professor who also teaches in the USA what the score is, get a proper, legal email sent to you and you can ram it up your parents arses until they get paper cuts.
> 
> I'm being serious though, give me an email address and I will get advice from her, do my own research and you can take control of your life.
> 
> People like your parents and their actions are the reason I want to do pro bono family law.

it definitely can't hurt for me to be informed.
if i could find a pro dono lawyer myself i would have asked, so i really appreciate your offer.
i've sent you my email.


----------



## aafscsweetie

https://probonolawyers.org/?state=GA

https://www.abanet.org/legalservices/probono/directory/georgia.html

(the second link is more thorough- the first link only lists pro bono lawyers in atlanta)


----------



## rjb

i found one in my area, and plan on calling later.
like i said, it can't hurt to get the facts.


----------



## vinteenage

rjb said:


> i found one in my area, and plan on calling later.
> like i said, it can't hurt to get the facts.

Good for you sweetheart.


----------



## x__amour

Becca, that's great! Please keep us update hon! :hugs:


----------



## JessdueJan

so sorry your going through this hun :hugs:

I hope you can speak to someone who can help you out of this mess and I wish you, your FOB and Adelaide the best of luck :flower:


----------



## Leah_xx

Becca im so sorry that your parents are doing this to you
but she is your daughter, they cant take her away from you.
you have done nothing wrong and youe FOB has the right to see his daughter.


----------



## annawrigley

rjb said:


> they can read what i post on here.
> i just don't care if they do anymore.
> they deserve to see how much this hurts me.
> *and it's a program that takes a snapshot of the screen every 1-5 minutes, so there's really no way around it.*

:shock: Wtf? Thats psychotic. Jesus...

Let us know how it goes talking to the lawyer :hugs: xxx


----------



## lesleyann

im a bit lost in a thread you made not long ago you was saying how he took drugs/cheated on you/called you a slag etc which was only made on the start of jan, and few before that about how he will never see her and that your wishing very horrible things on him, and one recently about starting to bf, threads about you missing your mum loads and cannot wait to get home again after staying out yet you seem to want to leave?

You obv know that you can stand up to your parents or you would not try to bf knowing that are agaisnt it, Is FOB still on drugs? is he just telling you his not?

I understand that if your parents are really horrible it must be so hard for you with what appears to be everythign agaisnt you but im just really lost on this whole thing.


----------



## rjb

i think he deserves a second chance if he's straight now


----------



## aafscsweetie

Everyone deserves a second chance, but second chances are hard to give out once a child is involved, so just make sure it really is the best thing. 

On another note, so glad you found one in your area and I really hope you do call :) You definitely need the FACTS- not all the bullshit your parents are spewing.


----------



## annawrigley

lesleyann said:


> im a bit lost in a thread you made not long ago you was saying how he took drugs/cheated on you/called you a slag etc which was only made on the start of jan, and few before that about how he will never see her and that your wishing very horrible things on him, and one recently about starting to bf, threads about you missing your mum loads and cannot wait to get home again after staying out yet you seem to want to leave?
> 
> You obv know that you can stand up to your parents or you would not try to bf knowing that are agaisnt it, Is FOB still on drugs? is he just telling you his not?
> 
> I understand that if your parents are really horrible it must be so hard for you with what appears to be everythign agaisnt you but im just really lost on this whole thing.

My FOB did all of the above but people change, he was a shitty bf but a great dad. And shes allowed to miss her mum :shrug:


----------



## 17thy

annawrigley said:


> And i'm not sure running away and getting married at 17 to make a point is the greatest display of maturity or the greatest advice to be giving someone... Maybe he did 'GET OVER IT', thats not to say rjb's parents would. And she wants to maintain a relationship with them, she has this thing called respect for them which most people tend to have for their parents...

Oh really? I thought growing the hell up and not letting my parents take care of MY child, or run mine or my childs life WAS a good display of maturity... ha how silly of me to think that... :roll:

And you know what? If her parents can't get over it, then screw them. They don't deserve a sweet girl like her and her daughter anyway.


----------



## annawrigley

You're missing the point, she's 15 years old, she has nowhere to go... I agree they dont deserve her or her daughter but she is STUCK. So have a little sensitivity, not everyone can just sail off into the sunset


----------



## xgem27x

17thy - I understand the points you are making but can't you write them in a kinder, supportive way because you're coming on too strong and you sound very rude and harsh. Not everyone is a fan of the "tough love" approach to things! Sorry but it had to be said. xx


----------



## rjb

havent been able to call yet as my parents have all the phones and are at home.
hopefully today around 2 they will still be open for me to call :/


----------



## xgem27x

All you have to think to yourself Becca, is this will get sorted out! I know its horrible atm but it will get resolved, your parents love you no matter what and you are not going to lose your daughter, so stay strong and I really hope things get sorted sooner rather than later xxxxx


----------



## amygwen

17thy said:


> annawrigley said:
> 
> 
> And i'm not sure running away and getting married at 17 to make a point is the greatest display of maturity or the greatest advice to be giving someone... Maybe he did 'GET OVER IT', thats not to say rjb's parents would. And she wants to maintain a relationship with them, she has this thing called respect for them which most people tend to have for their parents...
> 
> Oh really? I thought growing the hell up and not letting my parents take care of MY child, or run mine or my childs life WAS a good display of maturity... ha how silly of me to think that... :roll:
> 
> And you know what? If her parents can't get over it, then screw them. They don't deserve a sweet girl like her and her daughter anyway.Click to expand...

17thy: seriously chillaxxxxxxxx :coffee:


----------



## lesleyann

annawrigley said:


> lesleyann said:
> 
> 
> im a bit lost in a thread you made not long ago you was saying how he took drugs/cheated on you/called you a slag etc which was only made on the start of jan, and few before that about how he will never see her and that your wishing very horrible things on him, and one recently about starting to bf, threads about you missing your mum loads and cannot wait to get home again after staying out yet you seem to want to leave?
> 
> You obv know that you can stand up to your parents or you would not try to bf knowing that are agaisnt it, Is FOB still on drugs? is he just telling you his not?
> 
> I understand that if your parents are really horrible it must be so hard for you with what appears to be everythign agaisnt you but im just really lost on this whole thing.
> 
> My FOB did all of the above but people change, he was a shitty bf but a great dad. And shes allowed to miss her mum :shrug:Click to expand...

im not debating that he would deserve a second chance however in OPS words she is not allowed anywhere with out her parents so therefore would not know if he was really clean and the fact she was moaning about it not long ago. Also yes can miss your mum but if you hated living at home so much from the emotional black mail from your parents you would not on 1night away being saying how much you want to go back ect

Thats all that my points where :flower:


----------



## annawrigley

Fair enough :flower:


----------



## jenniferannex

:dohh:


----------



## rjb

like i said before, i love my parents, and i never said i want to leave. i want to stay and for things to work out so my daughter can have both sides of the family.
i thought i made that pretty clear :shrug:
anyway.
i guess i can't blame you for being skeptical.
it's a very confusing thing for me, and i'm the one going through it, so i could definitely understand.
but i am torn between choosing between my families.


----------



## aliss

rjb said:


> like i said before, i love my parents, and i never said i want to leave. i want to stay and for things to work out so my daughter can have both sides of the family.
> i thought i made that pretty clear :shrug:
> anyway.
> i guess i can't blame you for being skeptical.
> it's a very confusing thing for me, and i'm the one going through it, so i could definitely understand.
> but i am torn between choosing between my families.

Hi

Not a teen but I can see you are going through a lot. Just to clear something up, because you have been given some misinformation: 

- You are not emancipated at the age of 15 in your state (or any state) because you have had a child. You are *medically* emancipated (as someone has mentioned), meaning your parents have no authority in making medical decisions for you (and you have full authority over your child, legally, medical or otherwise).

- You will not be emancipated in any state at the age of 15 if you have had a child. The court would view being an unmarried minor with a child as someone who needs further supervision, rather than autonomy. 

I'm not sure if you knew that or not, I just wanted to clear that up in case you had any confusion. You sound pretty mature, knowing that it's probably best to try and work things out with your parents. Since the age of majority in Georgia is 18, you will need to live with them until then, unless they agree to other living arrangements or foster care. Good luck!


----------



## Heather9603

rjb said:


> I'm 15.
> Even if I had the money to no one would let me rent/buy a house.
> I'm having to choose between one family or the other here :((

Well since you are under 18, they cannot kick you out. So since they can't kick you out, they can't take your daughter either.


----------



## Callie-xoxox

I really hope you get this all sorted out.
We are *ALL* here for you every step of the way
xxx


----------



## MommyGrim

^
wss


----------



## Mrs Davies

Did you Manange to Talk to them Hun :)


----------



## x__amour

Any update Becca? I'm so worried! :nope:


----------



## newmommy23

call DHS and get yourself the fuck out of there honey. Everything in this thread is both really sad, and also really angering. Your parent's ARE emotionally abusing you. This is not an ok place for you or your daughter to be. There is no way they can take her from you. If they take you to court, bring up the fact that they have done all of this. Do you have any proof of them telling you not to breast feed and that you were forced into a csection? Anything, texts emails etc. The only thing I am worried about for your sake is that if they get CPS involved they might put you and your daughter into foster care. Because you are so young that could happen. You definitely need to get out of there though. I know you're scared, but they CANNOT take her. And you don't have to do ANYTHING they say. Think about how they make you feel....and then think if you want your daughter being around these people. Not having an extended family is a blessing sometimes. You need to get out of there..get proof of their abuse if you can. Just in case they do try to take you to court


----------



## rjb

I'm working into parenting my way now, and would like to wait until FOB goes to court.
I really don't wanna lose my family.


----------



## aafscsweetie

I'm glad that you are working on being more assertive. Before I was pregnant, I was really passive and always let things slide without confrontation or ever really speaking up for myself and what I wanted, but once Lily was in the picture, that was no longer an option. I've had to learn to be more assertive myself and it's totally been worth it, especially because it involves my daughter. I'm glad you are starting to do things your way! Your way is all that counts, your parents have no right to tell you how to parent, especially when you are doing such a great job. :hugs:


----------



## rjb

i wasn't forced into the c-section, she just told me i should get one, so i did.


----------



## rjb

my parents want me to clarify.
the monitoring program is because i was writing bad stuff to guys off the internet
so that isn't unjustified
and that she told me not to breastfeed for me, so i wouldn't have saggy boobs later
and to have a c section for me also so that i wouldnt go through the pain of labor and so i would be able to enjoy DTD more later


----------



## vinteenage

rjb said:


> and that she told me not to breastfeed for me, so i wouldn't have saggy boobs later
> and to have a c section for me also so that i wouldnt go through the pain of labor and so i would be able to enjoy DTD more later

Excuse me?!! That is so fucked up I'm literally fuming. 

Breastfeeding does *not* cause saggy boobs, age does. Here's one study, but I've read multiple others. And really, who the hell cares if your boobs sag if you're doing the best for your baby?

And suggesting you don't have a natural labor? _*AHHH!!!*_ What if you want more kids and you aren't allowed a VBAC? Not everyone has pain DTD after birth (it felt better for me, and several other girls here. Read Lois's thread on it). The pain of labor, if you're able to do it (obviously necessary c-sections are an entirely different thing) is so very empowering and you'd have lived through it. There's very little risk now, I'd say there's more risk having a c-section. A c-section is *far* harder on your body and requires tons more recovery time.

Your parents are fucking vain.

Oh my lord Becca I cannot even communicate the level of fury I'm experiencing right now.


----------



## fantastica

This whole situation is weird.
Hope you sort things though! x


----------



## aafscsweetie

what the fuck becca??? first of all, even if bf DID give you saggy boobs, she is a mother and should know that BF is the best for babies!!!!! omg. I am so angry right now. and having a c-section to not go through the pain of labor?!?!? the recovery from a c-section is horrible.

I cannot believe this. Your parents are fucking CRAZY. I'm sorry, I know you love them, but jesus, this is like a cult. You're being brainwashed.


----------



## aafscsweetie

Not to mention, YOUR DAD IS A FUCKING PEDIATRICIAN. HE SHOULD KNOW THAT BREASTFEEDING IS BEST AND THAT VAGINAL BIRTHS ARE IDEAL UNLESS THERE ARE SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES.


----------



## rainbows_x

This whole situation is really concerning. I cannot for the life of me fathom how your parents would suggest you not to BF and to have a c-section - especially for those reasons. BF does NOT make your boobs sag, the healing process from a c0section is horrible!

I cannot get my head around this, it;s insanely messed up. If I were you, I'd get me and my daughter out of there, now.


----------



## x__amour

If I said half the things I wanted to say my ass would get banned in the blink of an eye.
Breast feeding does not make your breasts saggy, pregnancy does. And even if it did, who the hell cares? You're giving the BEST nutrition to your child! And "c-section makes birth easier and sex easier" my ASS. I suffer every single mother fucking day from the affects of surgery on my back. There are so many complications with c-section. If you try a VBAC, the contractions can tear your uterus open! Not to mention with c-sections the risk of infection, increased blood loss, decreased bowel function, respiratory complications, risk of additional surgeries and I guess the biggest fact that IT CAN FREAKIN' KILL YOU. I understand c-sections, I really do obviously since I had to get an emergency one to save Tori and myself but a c-section just for BETTER SEX!?!? I would've taken a regular vaginal birth any day. I am so incredibly angry, I don't think words can describe it. I better end this here before I say something stupid but this is wrong Becca, just plain straight up wrong.


----------



## annawrigley

Your parents are actually crazy. A paediatrician advising his 15 year old daughter to have a c section so she can have more enjoyable sex? :shock: Slightly strange. I think me having good sex was the last thing my parents wanted to encourage after I'd had Noah!!

I don't want to offend you because I know they're your parents and you're obviously going to be protective of them and love them but maaaaaaaannnn I don't know how you're still sane. Its not right how they treat you at all and thats all I can say without losing my temper :\


----------



## aob1013

rjb said:


> my parents want me to clarify.
> the monitoring program is because i was writing bad stuff to guys off the internet
> so that isn't unjustified
> and that she told me not to breastfeed for me, so i wouldn't have saggy boobs later
> and to have a c section for me also so that i wouldnt go through the pain of labor and so i would be able to enjoy DTD more later

Your parents are vile.

Get out, quick!


----------



## aafscsweetie

Also, I don't understand how they can be so crazy overprotective, yet when you get pregnant they tell you to have a c-section so that you'll be able to enjoy sex again...??! No offense hun, but if my LO got pregnant at 15, her having sex would be the last thing I was condoning!!

(Also, I obviously have nothing against you being pregnant at 15 so don't take it that way- I was a teen too (19), but I'm just saying that I would make sure she wasn't planning on having another anytime soon)


----------



## vinteenage

Becca whats FOB name? Can one of us add him on FB and talk to him for you? PM one of us.


----------



## aafscsweetie

I do have a question though- if they see that you are posting all of this, doesn't it cause more conflict? Like, in your original post, you said you will be in huge amounts of trouble if your mom finds out, but she is monitoring your computer- so didn't you know she would find out from the post???

I just can't wrap my head around this. I feel so bad for you. :(


----------



## newmommy23

omg that can't be serious.....skipped bfing so your boobs don't sag? cutting yourself in half to enjoy sex more???
this is to f-ed up for me.
that is criminal.


----------



## rubixcyoob.

Your parents want to clarify, do not make me laugh!
Clarify what?
How disgusting, unreasonable, immature, weird and ****ish they are?

What will your mother tell you to do next? To age because your boobs will get saggy too?
What if you got pregnant again, I'm sure they'd hate that - yet after all, they are the ones who said about you having more enjoyable sex, so go fucking have it.

You parents are vile and make me sick.

Oh and I'm still looking into it, but it is very clear to me Rebecca that your parents *cannot* take your daughter at all. They have no rights, no reason to nor will their case ever stand up in court. However, _you_ can press charges against them for harassment.
I hope they see that and I hope you do press charge against them, they deserve it.


----------



## faolan5109

rubixcyoob. said:


> Your parents want to clarify, do not make me laugh!
> Clarify what?
> How disgusting, unreasonable, immature, weird and ****ish they are?
> 
> What will your mother tell you to do next? To age because your boobs will get saggy too?
> What if you got pregnant again, I'm sure they'd hate that - yet after all, they are the ones who said about you having more enjoyable sex, so go fucking have it.
> 
> You parents are vile and make me sick.
> 
> Oh and I'm still looking into it, but it is very clear to me Rebecca that your parents *cannot* take your daughter at all. They have no rights, no reason to nor will their case ever stand up in court. However, _you_ can press charges against them for harassment.
> I hope they see that and I hope you do press charge against them, they deserve it.

Not to mention if you document all of the harressment, it probally counts as child abuse( since you are still under age) and can legally amanciapte.


----------



## lily123

Rebecca, i feel so sad for you :cry:

Your parents honestly sound like they are threatening you, although they are very empty threats as they cannot legally take Adelaide from you.
Please please please pleeeease don't believe what they threaten you with, because it is untrue :hugs:

I wish you lived in the UK, i would happily drive you to see FOB so he could meet his daughter, every day if you wanted!
I just feel so, so heartbroken over this :cry:

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## rubixcyoob.

It is so awful isn't it?

I hope her parents realise how brutally disgusting they are before they loose their daughter and granddaughter for the rest of their natural born lives. I mean, what person in their right mind would allow that behaviour around themselves when they are able to move out and who would want to let their daughter stay or be in contact with such people.

No doubt her 'parent's', and I use that term lightly because what they are doing isn't worthy of the title just now, will see this and think we are all stupid little girls, who get knocked up and think we are running our mouths by saying this that and the next about them. They won't pay attention and will blindly do what they are doing. 
However, one day Rebecca won't be 15 with no means of escape or survival. One day she will be older, with financial stability and can move faster than they can check a laptop. Until they she just needs to know we are there for her, support her (albeit through words, but that can be enough sometimes), and give her advice and information.

:hugs: I hope you parents are smashed face first into a wall of reality soon.


----------



## Mellie1988

Just wanted to offer you some hugs hun :hugs:, I don't know anything about the legal side of it all, but as the other girls have said, theres no way that they can take your baby away from you... 

Your parents should be ashamed of themselves, you deserve alot more than this :( ....I hope you find a way round it all very soon and that you FOB and baby can be the family you want to be :( 

I'd report your parents to like a social services kind of thing, as a previous poster has said, your mum and dad are mentally and emotionally abusing you :nope: 

x


----------



## xgem27x

I think this is just so wrong
You shouldn't be the one taken to court of have your daughter taken away from you
Your parents are the ones that need to be done for child abuse
You are only 15 so still a child yourself and therefore your parents should be looking after you not treating you like this
I understand you want to keep both families but you shouldn't have to accept being treated like this because its just not right xxx


----------



## rjb

aafscsweetie said:


> I do have a question though- if they see that you are posting all of this, doesn't it cause more conflict? Like, in your original post, you said you will be in huge amounts of trouble if your mom finds out, but she is monitoring your computer- so didn't you know she would find out from the post???
> 
> I just can't wrap my head around this. I feel so bad for you. :(

Actually yes.
I'm in a lot of trouble right now because she says i'm bashing her to a bunch of people when all she's doing is protecting LO and looking out for me.
she thinks i've portrayed her unfairly.
she wouldn't talk to me at all yesterday, except to confront me about this.
my family is being torn apart even though i'm doing what they say now.
i don't think i can win.


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## annawrigley

With them, it doesnt sound like you can hun :nope: Just keep your chin up, things well get better in time. :hugs: xxx


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## newmommy23

I know that right now, you feel like losing your family would be the worst thing in the world, but honestly you would be better without them. Someday try to get away....you deserve to be free.


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## rjb

i talked to him today
and i feel a hundred times better already :)


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## Leah_xx

Thats good hun!
how things go?


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## rjb

Catherine_17 said:


> Thats good hun!
> how things go?

pretty well i guess :)


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## x__amour

:happydance:
Yay, Becca! I'm happy for you, I really, really hope you guys can sort things out! He really sounds like he wants to be there for you and Adelaide! Keep us updated! :hugs:


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## rjb

*UPDATE:*
I've started talking to him again because my mom wasn't any better when i wasn't, so i figured if she's going to act that way no matter what, i'd atleast like to have someone to make me feel better if ykwim?
for those of you on my FB, his name is samuel waters.
he still can't meet her because neither of us can drive,
but he atleast can talk to me and see pics of her :flower:


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## xgem27x

really glad you've got the strengh to do the right thing, its not your parents decision whether or not sam can see his child and as adelaides mother you have the right to see and talk to him too, you have a child together ffs so your parents need to accept that!

glad everythings ok though :) xxx


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## JessdueJan

I thought that was him, he seems like he really cares about you both :) I hope things start getting better for you and Adelaide :hugs:


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## rjb

my mom is back to saying i'm a bad mother and am putting myself before my child.
so.
there it is.


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## forgodssake

I'm sorry but I don't know how she has the bare faced cheek to call you a bad mother!!!


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## amygwen

What a bitch, Rebecca. Ignore her. I peeked at his facebook and it's too cute that he has Adelaide's photo as his. I love it


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## rjb

i just dont see why she won't lemme be happy.
i'm not hurting anyone!


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## Mummy2B21

Can you not go stay with FOB? You shouldnt let your parents control your life and how you want to raise your baby. FOB has more of a right then them to see his own child if i was n your shoes id move out and in with FOB maybe his family will support/help you both, If your parents dont like it its tough luck it aint up to them.


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## rjb

Mummy2B21 said:


> Can you not go stay with FOB? You shouldnt let your parents control your life and how you want to raise your baby. FOB has more of a right then them to see his own child if i was n your shoes id move out and in with FOB maybe his family will support/help you both, If your parents dont like it its tough luck it aint up to them.

if i move out i cant go to college and neither can FOB
he can't support me and the baby and both of us in college on his salary


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## annawrigley

:nope: Its such a shame, he looks so sweet (I had a nosy on FB :p), the album title for you and Adelaide and saying he loves you all the time, aww :( xx


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## rjb

annawrigley said:


> :nope: Its such a shame, he looks so sweet (I had a nosy on FB :p), the album title for you and Adelaide and saying he loves you all the time, aww :( xx

he really has gotten so much sweeter


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## Mummy2B21

Can't his parents help you both out im assuming there not as bad as your mum?


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## rjb

Mummy2B21 said:


> Can't his parents help you both out im assuming there not as bad as your mum?

i would hate to make them pay for me.


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## x__amour

OMG Becca, what a sweetheart! He really seems to care about you guys! IDGAF what your mom says, you are giving Adelaide the best gift ever, *HER DAD*. I'm so happy for you, I really hope you guys get things sorted and get back together because Adelaide and Samuel are your family now.
:hugs:


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## Burchy314

Becca you should look into single teen mom school benifits or any kind of schooling benifits if thats all thats holding you back. There are a lot out there. Scholarships and everything.


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## Rhio92

rjb said:


> *UPDATE:*
> *I've started talking to him again because my mom wasn't any better when i wasn't, so i figured if she's going to act that way no matter what, i'd atleast like to have someone to make me feel better *if ykwim?
> for those of you on my FB, his name is samuel waters.
> he still can't meet her because neither of us can drive,
> but he atleast can talk to me and see pics of her :flower:

I like your way of thinking! x


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## rjb

well i have to go to my sister's house til saturday night to get away from the hostility here, so i con't be able to talk to him til then :(
you girls take care of him for me :winkwink:


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## Mellie1988

Have fun at your sisters hun! xx


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## 17thy

Have fun at your sisters. Glad you're giving your FOB his daughter, and vice versa. :)


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