# Twin mums, what has been the hardest stage of twins?



## arj

I found the pregnancy quite sh!t really, although uncomplicated it was painful and uncomfortable and I hated it. Heartburn, backpain, tiredness, elevated heartrate, heavy, Braxton Hicks, weightgain, breathless, bladder squashage... but I heard twins were harder out than in! 

Everyone said that newborn twins are the worst and hardest thing etc, and nothing can prepare you for it, but then they came along and Im finding it a piece of cake!!! 
I have no help with the twins and I do all feeds day and night alone, doing half breast and half bottle, but I am having some help with the other two kids and housework etc. My boys are 4 weeks old and although it's definitely busy, its not difficult. Just time consuming. But they are really well behaved and feed and burp and go back to sleep, or just lie awake looking around, and if they grizzle I just pop the dummy in and they are happy most the time.

Im not tired at all during the day, or stressed, and feel a miiiiillion times better than when I was pregnant, but I cant help thinking this is the 'calm before the storm'.....???? 

Is this the easy part and then all hell is going to break loose when they reach a certain age?

What's been your experience?


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## 1948LC

For the first 6 weeks mine were great - fed, slept, fed, slept and so on. They did wake through the night every 3 hours but as soon as they were fed went straight back to sleep. 

So far weeks 6 to 12 were the hardest. They were harder to settle after feeds through the day and everything seemed to take forever to do, feeding, going out......

Now I'm finding them a complete joy to have and really enjoying them. They both have very similar personalities, Alana can protests a bit louder. They've slept through the night from 12 weeks, 7pm till 6.30am. They smile all the time and are such happy babies they absolutely love their big sisters and it's lovely to see them together.

I did find my pregnancy uncomfortable, but I was more mentally worried I would go into pre term labour throughout my pregnancy due to cervix problems so this I think distracted my physical pain! x


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## Bumblebee117

hey arj! 

Mine were also very easy and wonderful the first 6 weeks apart from my girl having attachment issues - she wouldn't be happy anywhere but on me! So I just had her on me all day unless I was breastfeeding my boy! they fed, slept and pood! :)

After those 6 weeks they suddenly wanted attention, couldn't do anything by themselves though and were so hard to settle after feeds, just like LC said above.
Until they were about 12 weeks and then it suddenly clicked and they turned into very well behaved babies. 

My girl sleeps through, my boy has only once... but he is on a good way and will get there when he is ready. 

I hope it will be different for you but I have to say that most mums that I have spoken to at my local twins club say that 6-12 weeks is the most difficult time... until teething! 

I never had any teething symptoms so having my fingers crossed that my children won't have any either!

:hug: xx 

ps.: would love to see some new pics of your twinnies! x


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## fuzzylu

I found the first 6-9 weeks the worse as my boys were bad sleepers and one suffered with reflux/colic. the lack of sleep really hit me hard. it was at about 9 weeks when they started to go longer between feeds that things started to improve. in the early days hubby would get home from work at 5pm and i was still in my pjs as i hadent had time to get dressed between feeds and nappies. now i at least manage to put some clothes on lol

My boys are now nearly 2 and i am loving being a twin mummy. still have some bad/stressful days but they really are a joy to be around. still working on the sleeping but its much improved.


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## TwoBumps

I hated being pregnant....honestly every minute of it was awful!! I didn't bloom or have a pregnancy glow - I was just horrendously sick until 20 weeks plus and was shattered and seriously uncomfortable - then pre eclampsia at 31 weeks and an emergency c section.....enough said!! However......the boys as babies were an absolute breeze!! I realise that I was really lucky, but they used to feed, play,sleep and were just really easy!

Now toddlerhood.....hmmmm.....the boys are nearly 3 and I think between 18 months and 2 1/2 were the hardest for me so far. Don't get me wrong they were an absolute joy a lot of the time and it was amazing to watchb them grow and develop, but the tantrums, fighting, arguing and screaming were hard work and absolutely exhausting! We still have all of the above, but they are starting to listen more and we can reason with them more, so I'm hoping that that phase is coming to an end.
I would be really interested to see what other twin mummies think especially those with older twins :flower:


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## genies girl

For me it's right now the toddler stage as we are about to turn 2 it's the constant fighting , and testing me they gang up and have a play mate all day and soon learnt that if one is doing something wrong the other can carry it on when the other stops !

And the running in two different directions :)

That sounds like a lot of moaning but i wouldn't change a thing every stage has been exciting with its rewards too x


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## Ste4mr

I have to say pregnancy. i hated it!.. oober happy to be given this gift but the pain, pressure and uncertainty of things was hard.

Im loving my boys and i too am finding it a breeze. See why theres never a complaint on my fb page? lol.

i guess im lucky that my 2 slept through the night from 8 weeks. My home helper does the house for me but now that the boys are in a set routine i know when to get some washing done or tidy up a bit. doesnt leave her much to do so she'll sit down and have a coffee with me or lunch. 

I enjoy going out with them all too, its really not as hard as people make out.

I think you'll be just fine Arj :)


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## lizziedripping

Hey arj, I honestly believe that the main reason you're finding things easier than you expected is because you're an experienced Mom and these are babies 3 and 4 for you. 

Although I was knackered and drained in the first 4mths, I can't believe how chilled I felt compared to my first baby! Despite me being busier and run off my feet, everything felt easier somehow, and the only thing that was different was that the boys were #3 and 4 for me and I was just more relaxed and confident.

It also helps that having had previous newborns, you kind of 'brace' yourself for what's coming with two, but the reality is pleasantly surprising only because you know what to expect.

I have a,ways said that the biggest change is going from zero kids to the first - and it's a shock at just how hard it is. By baby 4 there are fewer surprises and that makes for a more relaxed Mom. It also helps of course that your twins are reasonably good babies ;)

There's no reason why things should get harder, tho one of my twins is much harder work as a toddler than he ever was as a baby, and he was my most chilled out newborn to date! Conversely, my 'difficult' newborns turned into placid pre-schoolers - maybe it's some kind of 'baby law' which says you either get one or the other lol.

Glad you're enjoying the boys so much xx


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## _Vicky_

Newborn by a million times!!!! The boys were my first and sleep deprivation and doing anything for anyone other than myself was alien to me - ahhhhhhhh those were the days ehehehehehehehe 

I am LOVING the 'terrible' twos they are such great company and love each other so much it makes me cry! Daily!


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## arj

Interesting!!! 

I think Lizzie you are right, babies 3 and 4 for me have been easier than my 1st, who was a really good baby too but just such a shock! I wasnt used to the constantness of it all, day in day out round the clock responsibility type thing. Whereas now, that's my life, Im used to it, and have done the baby thing before. Plus my second was a colic/reflux/screamer so that prepared my for anything I think!!!

I dont mind lack of sleep, but I hate being in constant pain which is why I think the twin pregnancy sucked so much. With my last singleton pregnancy I was jogging every day and fit as a fiddle, as opposed to lying on the couch all day feeling huge and sore.

And yes Steam4r you made it appear easy on your fb page, no complaints at all!


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## SaraM

I was expecting the absolute worst so no matter how hard it gets it cant possibly be as bad as i expected. I hated being pregnant so much that having the babies out just made me so happy.
The first 6 weeks after i had the babies I was on an adrenaline high - I was as happy as can be.
For me, my babies are 3 months and I find this stage hard because they both demand to be held all the time at the same time.
I dont know how u do it by urself with 2 older kids - i have the same aged kids as u and i have full time help and still find it hard.


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## zephyr

I remember posting an update at 6 weeks saying it had been hard but a lot easier than I thought it would be. Well I think 6 weeks till now it has been very rough. As they got more demanding etc
there was one week where they put on a kilo between them and that week they were both unsettled so my back was killing me by the end of it.
I think I cried most days round 7 or 8 weeks 
I think every stage so far has been hard, just in a different way. At least that is how it has been for me. Some things I can manage better than others.
I know in the first 6 weeks we managed trips out etc but now I would not even dream of going out by myself, in fact I start panicking just thinking about it and cancel anything if I dont have my sister or partner with me.

I do have one baby who has severe reflux though and screams most of the day and wont sleep unless she is on me or in her pushchair and then because I spend so much time trying to make sure she eats enough etc I tend to carry Max around in the moby wrap because I feel bad that he is missing out.
If I had two reflux babies.........I really would of gone insane. 

Actually thinking about it now cos these are babies 4 and 5 for me, 1st baby with reflux, I think the reflux is the main problem. It has been a nightmare!!


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## scottishchick

Well i didnt get to spend the first few weeks with my boys, but had them both home for 7 weeks ( tomorrow) it honestly feels like it has been so much longer and feel they have been here Ages! must have been all the hospital trips and exhaustion. Was finding it Quite easy the first week or two after having them home. But last 3/4 weeks have been a nightmare:( After 2 weeks of them constantly screaming and being so unsettled all day and night I took them to hospital knowing something was'nt right. I was going out of my mind! they have colic and reflux , are on medication for it but still not settling very good. So hopefully the 6-12 week stage is the hardest as i hope i've overcome it and hopefully getting easier as the weeks go on. :kiss:


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