# fundraising for ivf??? tacky or acceptable? ????



## babymaybee

Ok fellow ladies of the "everyone and their brother is pregnant and not me" club.I have personally been ttc for a total of 8 years..on and off ....mostly on. I have tried through two marriages...countless doctors and no answers. I am 28 and beyond ready to be a mommy. We are now looking into ivf but our PA insurance covers NO infertility treatments and years of other treatments meds dr bills ect...hasnt exactly left us with the 26000 we have been informed we are going to need for ivf in our area. So my question is this.. has anyone fundraised for this before? I dont know how i feel about it really. Any thoughts....a rather up in the air topic no doubt! Bring on the opinions please!!!
thanks girls


----------



## babymaybee

I just want to say also that we are very aware that raising a child is expensive...we make enough to comfortably raise a family...we just dont have 20+ thousand dollars in the bank and dont have a large amount of equity in our home for a second mortgage being as though we purchased it within the last 3 years.Lets face it that kind of money is not stuffed in the mattresses of most ppl whom have spent years paying monthly for treatments copays deductibles and meds...


----------



## valentine1

babymaybee said:


> Ok fellow ladies of the "everyone and their brother is pregnant and not me" club.I have personally been ttc for a total of 8 years..on and off ....mostly on. I have tried through two marriages...countless doctors and no answers. I am 28 and beyond ready to be a mommy. We are now looking into ivf but our PA insurance covers NO infertility treatments and years of other treatments meds dr bills ect...hasnt exactly left us with the 26000 we have been informed we are going to need for ivf in our area. So my question is this.. has anyone fundraised for this before? I dont know how i feel about it really. Any thoughts....a rather up in the air topic no doubt! Bring on the opinions please!!!
> thanks girls

I personally wouldn't do it but I wouldn't judge others who do/have. Everyone has the right to be a parent and hold their baby in their arms so if the only means to doing that is asking for donations then good for them I say!

Where abouts are you? I live in Australia and our IVF prices are not that high, it's amazing the differences in price!


----------



## PinkPeony

No need to explain to us about it not being the easiest thing to find an extra 26k lying around. Certainly doesn't mean you can't afford kids.
I don't find it tacky to fundraise but personally if it were me, I think I couldn't handle the extra pressure of the idea that I would have to tell all my doners if it didn't work. Like that seems like it would be a nightmare. 
Depending on where you live, you might look into going away to another country. I've heard of ppl going places like Mexico or Czec republic (if you're in Europe).


----------



## ChartsNHearts

My cousin and her husband did some fundraising to raise money for their IVF treatment. I don't think anyone who donated had any problem with giving the money, but it did put extra pressure on the couple involved.

Her husband was always a bit uncomfortable with it and I think they both felt that it added pressure on them for the IVF to 'work' - after all, there were now so many more people 'invested' in a positive outcome.

When they didn't get a take-home baby out of it, they also felt a bit like they had wasted other people's money and almost felt guilty. I imagine having that guilt on top of all the other emotions they were going through must have made it epecially hard for them.

I have no problem with fundraising either by the way, but just thought I'd add some food for thought.


----------



## pinksprinkles

I don't think there is anything wrong with it at all!


----------



## foquita

no need to justify yourself :hugs: 

I don't think it's tacky and don't have a problem with it, I think it depends on your family and friends and how open you are about your infertility, and also how understanding people you know are! but I say go for it :) 

I hadn't thought of what pinkpeony said but she's right, it would put a bit more pressure on you but really anything is worth a try to hopefully get a baby at the end :hugs: 

I can't believe how expensive IVF is where you are, have you looked into going abroad for it?


----------



## pinksprinkles

How many cycles do you get for that $26,000? Is it refundable if they don't get you pregnant? DH and I are moving to NY/NJ later this year so I have been looking into OOP costs for both IUI and IVF. There are several clinics in NJ that only chraage $8,000 a cycle (not sure if that includes meds or not, but I think so). So you could get up to 3 cycles for less than what you're being told. And if you only end up needing one cycle, you'd definitely save a lot. The standard success rate for IVF is around 60% a cycle, so if you're going to get pregnant from it, you generally will have that happen in the first couple cycles. However, if your RE really isn't sure you can get PG, then I would say it could be worth it to pay for the multi-cycle package _if_ they are going to refund you if it doesn't work. Of course, since you've had a chemical before it seems like you are totally able to get pregnant. Anyway, maybe consider going elsewhere if the price tag is too outrageous.


----------



## babymaybee

[Wow ladies thank you sooo much for your advice and opinions the 26k is for a multiple cycle sharing program and half is given back if you dont get pregnant. It is 15k per cycle with meds without this plan...totally outrageous but hopefully worth it!...i never considered the added pressure of asking for help and it not working....i think that is probably going to stop me from fundraising in general. Maybe within my family but nothing on a more public scale. I live in the usa. Pennsylvania. I have the option of two respected fertility clinics relatively close to me but both are equally expensive. Have any of you ladies tried ivf..if so what were your costs and where do you live. As far as going out if country i dont know if travel expenses would even make it worth it but going to another state might!


----------



## babymaybee

pinksprinkles said:


> How many cycles do you get for that $26,000? Is it refundable if they don't get you pregnant? DH and I are moving to NY/NJ later this year so I have been looking into OOP costs for both IUI and IVF. There are several clinics in NJ that only chraage $8,000 a cycle (not sure if that includes meds or not, but I think so). So you could get up to 3 cycles for less than what you're being told. And if you only end up needing one cycle, you'd definitely save a lot. The​standard success rate for IVF is around 60% a cycle, so if you're going to get pregnant from it, you generally will have that happen in the first couple cycles. However, if your RE really isn't sure you can get PG, then I would say it could be worth it to pay for the multi-cycle package _if_ they are going to refund you if it doesn't work. Of course, since you've had a chemical before it seems like you are totally able to get pregnant. Anyway, maybe consider going elsewhere if the price tag is too outrageous.

I have heard that new jersey is required by law for their insurance providers to cover some ivf costs but only if your are employed in the state. The plan that was advised for me is a multiple cycle program but only with one retrieval which totally determines the number of transfers obviously. Honestly i am not sure if they consider me more difficult. to get pregnant or not. I guess so. If pregnancy is achieved on the first try then i forfeit the extra money. An independent cycle with meds is 15000 that includes follow up ivf related tests and appts.which are not covered under insurance in pa. Our insurance is pretty much the best you can get and absolutley not one ivf related treatment med or related appt is covered at all. If we would not get pregnant at all we get half of the money back. I am. Going to look into nearby states and look at costs with everything included.maybe my silverlining is in wv or ohio...


----------



## pinksprinkles

NJ mandates that companies with a certain number of employees provide those employees with an insurance option that covers IVF. The price I'm talking about is for people who do not have that insurance. NYC also has some laws about IF insurance for larger companies. I'd definitely look around and check out different facilities. It could be beneficial. Good luck!! :flow:


----------



## babymaybee

pinksprinkles said:


> NJ mandates that companies with a certain number of employees provide those employees with an insurance option that covers IVF. The price I'm talking about is for people who do not have that insurance. NYC also has some laws about IF insurance for larger companies. I'd definitely look around and check out different facilities. It could be beneficial. Good luck!! :flow:

Thank you! I am staying positive. I think it is research time!!!!


----------



## LaylaShawn

I don't fund raise per say but I do have bake sales. I used to bake as a hobby. My family, friends and coworkers always asked me for baked goods and I did it for free. About 6 months ago I decided I would start using my skill to make money. Now I have orders almost every weekend. I put every dime away for IVF ( in case we need it). Is there anything you can do to make extra money? Bake, cook, sew, do hair? Good luck!!


----------



## Disneyjoy

Hi. I actually just registered with this site so I could respond to your post. I totally feel your pain. I have unexplained infertility and after doing a research study and getting pregnant we lost our baby. I have some possible good news here. I live in PA also and there is an IVF research study slated to start in June. You would have to qualify but you would get free IVF medication and the procedure may be discounted, I'm not totally sure. You would definitely have to talk with them for all of the details. The office is located in Bryn Mawr, PA and it is Mainline Fertility. The name of the person in charge of the study is Eileen Davies. If you call and talk with her she may be able to help you. She is incredibly kind and is helping my husband and me in a huge way. She is also super supportive. Even if this study is not right for you there may be others. I haven't worked with their clinic yet and I've only had one appointment with their Dr. but so far I am happy. I'm not sure if you have had IVF before but there is a study in NYC that is free except for the cost of testing and medication. If has to be your first time, you have to be within a weight guideline and there are numerous conditions that would exclude you but if you can get into the study I believe it was under $6,000. YOu can totally do this for less especially if you can get into a study. The study is at New Hope Fertility in NYC. If you can find their website there is a form you can fill out that will tell you right away whether or not you qualify. Good luck and please let me know if there is any way I can help.


----------



## zanDark

wow! I can't believe how expensive IVF is in other countries!! No wonder people from all over the world come here for treatment! I had mine at the best and most expensive center here and it cost 3200 euros + another 1000 for all the shots and meds!

If it were that expensive here, then I'd do the same thing! That is A LOT of money and I'd do anything I possibly could to get that amount and go through with it!


----------



## pinksprinkles

DH and I have now decided to travel overseas for our IVF. It saves so much money!! We are also fundraising through donations, doing a craft sale, and doing a few other things to raise money. We started raising money less that a month ago and have raised $700 so far. We need to raise $5000 for our first cycle, but I really believe we can do it.


----------

