# the birds and the bees talk to a 9 year old



## mummy_of_5

hi need some advice my daughter is 9 and is constantly asking where babies come from i always say their a gift from the hospital but she does'nt believe me any more the kids in her class have told her it's from having sex so she asked me what that is i told her that sex means boy or girl she said dont be silly mum she asks me on a daily basis i try to ignore it and change the subject as i think she is too young but it's getting to the point now where i feel i should tell her just to stop her from asking i'm also worried what her friends are going to tell her next 
how old were your children when you told them?


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## Vonnie18

Hey hun, my oldest will be 9 in September and also starting asking questions. We have told him how babies are made. Some people may think that's too young but I would rather they were told from us than finding out bits and bobs in the playground. He already knew a little bit of stuff anyway obviously hearing things from other kids at school. I'd rather my kids were able to feel comfortable coming to me and talking about things like this rather than going to their friends and getting incorrect info (later on in life obv) but want to start out being honest and open with them. And to tell you the truth there is so much of it on the tv these days aswell that it's even harder to avoid discussing it x


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## moomin_troll

I'd say be honest about it all. I found out what sex was when I was 8 thanks to my big sister lol so I kinda guessed where the baby came from but my mum was always honest with me if I asked her something


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## more babies

I just want to throw something out there from the other side. I got pregnant when I was 16 and sex was not something we talked about in my family. We didn't really talk about much.. it was just beyond awkward and even if I had brought it up I know my mother wouldnt have talked about it. Im 27 and married now and heck I still wouldn't feel comfortable talking about it. The point im trying to get to is... as much as I love my daughter and wouldn't change anything.. if I had someone to talk to all those years and make me feel comfortable about sex or more like not having it I would have been more confident in being able to tell my boyfriend at the time that I just wasn't ready and didn't want to do it. Im not saying its an easy conversation and its not one that I've had with my 10 year old yet but I know it's coming soon and as awkward as its going to be ill make sure she knows she can ask me anything and be comfortable with me. She hasn't asked me anything about it yet though. I hope I've helped!


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## JASMAK

I told my kids last year when they were 7 and 8. I just said it how it was. A man and a woman love and care for each other, and the penis, and how it works, and what it does, and the vagina and it's role. Also the sperm and how it fertilizes the egg and makes a baby. Just say it how it is, because chances are, she has heard from school and knows it already and wants it confirmed...and who knows what version she has heard!!! I am also getting my kids books on puberty THIS year as it can start as early as 8 in girls and 9 in boys. My sister gave her son a really good one. It talks about feelings, puberty, girls, chores...etc. There are some really good ones out there.


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## JASMAK

I find this site good for info, and it also has a section for kids.

https://kidshealth.org/parent/growt...foyer.html?tracking=P_RelatedArticle#cat10007


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## mummy_of_5

thanks for all your reply's will have that chat tomorrow i might tell my son aswell he is 8 he asked me about babies this morning so will defo do it tomoz i'll let you know how i get on thanks again


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## mummy_of_5

i had the talk with her she knew more than i thought it made it easier i just corrected a few points thanks for all your advice!


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## Vonnie18

mummy_of_5 said:


> i had the talk with her she knew more than i thought it made it easier i just corrected a few points thanks for all your advice!

It's amazing the amount they know just from hearing it from friends etc. glad the talk went well :) x


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## xxembobxx

My daughter was about the same age when she started asking questions. She knew the workings already as they had been doing it in school (hence the questions).
I just tried to make sure that emotions were discussed, sex is not just a physical thing.
The questions only get worse.....she asked me what an orgasm is the other day.....then asked if I had ever had one :shock:


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## Vonnie18

xxembobxx said:


> My daughter was about the same age when she started asking questions. She knew the workings already as they had been doing it in school (hence the questions).
> I just tried to make sure that emotions were discussed, sex is not just a physical thing.
> The questions only get worse.....she asked me what an orgasm is the other day.....then asked if I had ever had one :shock:

OMG! I just spat my juice everywhere lol. How did you answer that one?? X


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## TattiesMum

xxembobxx said:


> My daughter was about the same age when she started asking questions. She knew the workings already as they had been doing it in school (hence the questions).
> I just tried to make sure that emotions were discussed, sex is not just a physical thing.
> The questions only get worse.....she asked me what an orgasm is the other day.....then asked if I had ever had one :shock:


My 3 all had sex education at school when they were about 9 ... My DH will never forget the day Tattie asked him how old he was when he had his first wet dream :rofl:


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## minties

JASMAK said:


> I told my kids last year when they were 7 and 8. I just said it how it was. A man and a woman love and care for each other, and the penis, and how it works, and what it does, and the vagina and it's role. Also the sperm and how it fertilizes the egg and makes a baby. Just say it how it is, because chances are, she has heard from school and knows it already and wants it confirmed...and who knows what version she has heard!!! I am also getting my kids books on puberty THIS year as it can start as early as 8 in girls and 9 in boys. My sister gave her son a really good one. It talks about feelings, puberty, girls, chores...etc. There are some really good ones out there.

I would go with this!

Sex talks don't need to be sexual...I know that sounds dumb, but try talking about it from a more scientific point of view if it helps you to not feel so uncomfortable.

Think of it like bees pollinating plants or something.

I'm 29 and they had told us all about menstruation, sperm and eggs when I was 8. It wasn't a rude or sexy kinda thing, just very plain facts and diagrams.


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## CanadianMaple

I teach 10 year olds and just finished their puberty unit. Google "Always Changing program" and they have a video there.


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