# medical management



## lilesMom

Hey all.
Just feeling a bit lonely.
Took cytotec earlier for mmc
Up in middle of the night waiting for it to kick in properly
Its so far causing mild cramping and bleeding
But nothing major yet
Hope it works
I've had two d and c s previously
And don't want another one
Hugs to anyone suffering with loss right now
It is the most horrible time.
But I know from previously I will get over it and feel better
Xxx
Anyone else do med management
Anyone hve good experience with it
Lots of internet horror stories
But Il talk to u if its a horror story too &#128522;
Xxx


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## lilesMom

In case I frighten anyone
The d and cs were physically fine
I just don't want to go to hospital this time xxx


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## lilesMom

Update.
For anyone thinking of medical management
For me it couldn't hve gone easier.
I had read some awfull stories
I took the ponstan I was prescribed and took paracetemol
Glued myself to a hot water bottle
And I was fine
Pretty sure I passed everything this morn.
Bringing it to hospital now to be sure 
Fingers crossed.
For anyone torn between d and c, med management and natural
For me this couldn't hve gone better.
Just so u know its possible for good outcomes too, ( well never good to hve lost baby , but hope u know what I mean)


LATER UPDATE

The reason it was so easy was a lot of clots left inside.
4 weeks later got lots of clots 
Ended up in round 3 of antibiotic.
This time 2 kinds of antibiotic.
Don't think I ever do medical mgt ayain.
Just to let ye know my whole story.
But I dud only take one lot of tablets, not the second.
On docs advise, 
I passed sac with first lot.
Maybe if i took second lot, i would hve passed the clots and lining too


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## LoraLoo

I'm sorry hun. My losses were later on so d&c wasn't an option so had to have the pessaries and tablets and stay in hospital over night, but I'd still have chosen that over a d&c anyways. I hope your physical recovery is quick- I know emotionally the healing takes a lot longer. Huge hugs x


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## mrs.green2015

I'm so sorry for your loss. I took misoprostol last night to finish my miscarriage. Yesterday morning I started to miscarriage on my own. The sac with baby came out but most of the lining didn't and my cervix closed. Hence use of the meds. I wanted a d&c but they couldn't schedule me for a week so I chose this route. Last night wasn't too bad. It was painful but I took lots of pain meds and had a heating pad. Nothing was worse than miscarriaging and seeing the sac.


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## lilesMom

Thanks ladies. Xx
Sorry for ur losses xxx

Loralou, I'm called Laura Lou by family and some friends too &#128522;
Hope ur ok now.
Sorry for ur losses
Later most be much harder
Hugs xxx
How did u know ur lining hadn't come
If u don't mind me asking
I've had lots of little clots before and now again
Plus the sac and baby this morn
Will hve scan in ten days to check lining
But hoping its nearly done or will be over next few dats.
I'm not sure how much lining I should be seeing


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## lilesMom

Hugs Mrs green 
Sorry u didn't get to hve a choice of d and c xx
Hope this works for u xxx
For me it actually helped me to see the sac
Made him more real to me 
And I felt like I could say bye
I didn't think id want to see
But I did.
Huge hugs to u.

Thanks for responses girls xxx


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## lilesMom

For anyone who finds this and is thinking of medical mgt 
In my case it worked well
I'm writing this possibly TMI account partly to make me feel better in getting it out
And partly cakes when I googled prior to it
I didn't find many good stories.

I took it at 8 Friday night
4 tabs orally
Did feel nausea and dizziness for an hour and a half but not major
Started bleeding then 
With little clots on and off
Had something to eat to take my ponstan and nausea went
Had some cramping but hot water bottle made it fine
I slept on and off all night.
Waking to go to loo
Had gushes of bleeding with cramps
They got closer together and more bleeding towards morning.
I woke and had bled a good deal
Went to loo and sac just slipped out
Painless
Still had the mild cramping, more like squeezes than pain
They started to die down ad soon as sac passed.
Advised to keep taking ponstan
As they help limit blood loss as well ad pain relief
Had heating pad on all day but I'm ok
Apart from tiring easily .

Il update how I am over next few days.
So of it may help someone know what to expect later
Of course its different for everyone
But so ye get to see all possibilities
Not just the bad
Xxx


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## mrs.green2015

Mine was kind of similar. Took them at 9 but also took the Tylenol with coding the doctor prescribed to help with cramps. Although it didn't help much it did however help me sleep. I used a heating pad all night. When it would automatically turn off u woke up in pain, took more meds and turned the pad back on. Overall pain wasn't bad. But not much bleeding so that worries me. Because if enough of the lining doesn't come out I'll have to get the d&c anyway. I'll also keep updated in a few days.


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## OmarsMum

Glad it worked for you and sorry for your losses :hugs: 

It didn't work for me, after a week on cytotec daily (orally & internally), I didn't have any cramps & just minor bleeding. I had to go for a D&C as it didn't work, my cervix softened a bit but it didn't dilate past 1 cm. that was my 2nd D&C


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## lilesMom

Mrs green, fingers crossed it is done for us both.
I'm still getting little clots today 
But very little bleeding
But I'm still taking the ponstan as advised
It is supposed to slow bleeding
Hopefully rescan will show we r done and no d and c xxx


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## lilesMom

OmarsMum said:


> Glad it worked for you and sorry for your losses :hugs:
> 
> It didn't work for me, after a week on cytotec daily (orally & internally), I didn't have any cramps & just minor bleeding. I had to go for a D&C as it didn't work, my cervix softened a bit but it didn't dilate past 1 cm. that was my 2nd D&C

Hugs hon
Sorry it didn't work for u xxx
I've had two previous d and c too
Just really didn't want to go to hosp this tome 
Cos I've a 2 yr old who was sick 
And I didn't want to leave him.
Even for a day .
My two d and c went fine but I just felt like I should try at home this time.
I think it worked for me cos I was close to it happening amyway
I had some bleeding and cramping ( mainly out my back) before it.
So I think all my body needed was a small nudge
Sorry for ur losses xxx 
Be nice to yourself while u heal xxx


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## mrs.green2015

I agree lilesmom hopefully we don't have to do anything else. My bleeding has slowed way down. With no more clots. My appointment is next Monday to follow up. Yours?


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## lilesMom

Mine isn't until tues week
They give ten days to make sure u hve a chance to finish
Best of luck with ur check up xx


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## mrs.green2015

You too! Keep me updated. It's nice to have someone else going through the same thing.


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## lilesMom

Had more cramping this morn.
Started bleeding again later with little teeny clots
Feel much better again. .
Bit tired so I'm gonna take iron tab for a few days
But I'm grand really 
Much better than I thought I would be

Hope ye r holding up ok ladies xxx


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## lilesMom

U t


mrs.green2015 said:


> You too! Keep me updated. It's nice to have someone else going through the same thing.

U too hon xx


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## lilesMom

I was a bit naive
I so wasn't done
Woke up with cramping and bleeding
Felt like more to go 
I went for a good long walk
( slower than norm and on flat ground)
Figuring it would kill or cure me &#128522;
When I came home had a long hot shower 
And everything started to go
Had a lot, a lot f clots and blood
Feel much better but a little dizzy now
Fingers crossed that is now me done &#128522; 
If I need a d and c after this

Il hve no more blood left in me!!
Hope ye r ok ladies xxx


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## lilesMom

Still having some bleeding and clots 
Had scan today
Just lining left , she said could bleed for another week yet
Am on antibiotic for a week cos think maybe infection starting
Pain yest and today, different to cramping.more sharp
And slight slight smell
So doc said safer to take antibiotic
I should hve taken the second lot of pills to get clots out quicker 
But I didn't know how much was left
I'm just writing this in case anyone going through the same
Finds it and reads it.
I found lots of bits of stories when i was searching but none with much follow up


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## lilesMom

Mrs green did u get all clear?
Hope so xxx


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## lilesMom

Mrs green did u get the all clear?


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## lilesMom

Scan lady also said the main reason they say wait one cycle
Is because u hve slight I crease risk of mc
She said if there was something left inside
There would be small chance new bub could implant into that
And then miscarry.
Makes sense to me
But we are gonna wait to do blood tests anyway
Best of luck everyone xx
If anyone finds this and is struggling 
Il keep this in my subscribed
And will help if I can xxx


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## mrs.green2015

I did get the all clear. I stopped bleeding Friday and everything seems to have passed. She told us to use condoms this month Niro don't know. So you were still bleeding when you went to your appointment?

How are you doing emotionally?


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## lilesMom

Glad u got the all clear too x 
Yeah still hve a little bleeding but much less.
I think I actually ov the night before last.
Had cm and ov pain.
Scan lady said not unusual ten days after passing sac and bub
Didn't think it would happen at least till bleeding stopped 
But she said ovaries look fine so prob ov pain 
I'm not gonna ttc fir a bit
Getting blood tests done and stuff too
So gonna wait for them
I don't feel brave enough awhile anyway &#55357;&#56842;
Best of luck with ur ttc
Hope its fast xx


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## lilesMom

Nearly missed ur Qs. Sirryw
I'm ok ish emotionally
Its my third mc so I'm getting used to it unfortunately
I hve a lil boy who keeps me distracted
Good and bad
Sometimes u just want to be alone and be pissed off but u cant 
How are u?


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## mrs.green2015

I am so incredibly sorry you've had 3 losses. That is absolutely the worst. I feel like it's a roller coaster. I'm fine one day and the next I'm a mess. I've noticed when I get stressed or upset about anything it all comes back to this if that makes sense. Hubs is starting to let it get to him too so I think it's a bad combo. Plus were trying to buy a house. At one point it came up if we should even try again. But I think it's what we both truly want. 

I can't believe you ovulated already. That's so fast! I have no idea when I'll ovulate, I don't have symptoms and I'm not temping or testing. I figure my period will come in within 6 weeks. I just started spitting today again.


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## lilesMom

Yup that makes total sense
Its like all the things build up till u crack a little 
And the sadness sneaks in &#55357;&#56842;
Bad day for me today too.
I'm nearly at bfn already.
Really faint now.
Obvs I want bfn to say my body is normal 
But I don't cos I still want to be preg
Sucky!!!!
I've never got ov and bfn thus fast before.
Last two times took 3 weeks and 3.5 weeks for bfn
And then two weeks after af
Its not even been two weeks
The one time I don't want to try right away is when my body does it fast
Doh &#55357;&#56842;
My little guy had cerebral palsy and epilepsy 
His epilepsy meds are being changed and he is cranky all the time
He is driving me potty trying to keep him happy
All I want to do is cry today
And its def like u said other stuff making me worse 
I'm ok if rest of life is ok
But I'm feeling like life is very unfair today
Hope ur a bit better
Xxx
It comes in patches and soon the bad patches are very spaced out xxx
Hugs


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## mrs.green2015

I haven't even tested yet to see if I'm at a bfn. I think I'm scared to. I want a bfn, but then I don't just like you. So I get it. It sounds like your a saint lol your son needs a lot of attention and you're still doing it even if it is driving you crazy. I don't even want to be at work half the time I can't even imagine. 

Hubs and I have been on such an emotional roller coaster with everything and we haven't been synced up so it's been frustrating. And although I know he needs to grieve part of me just needs him strong for me still so I feel selfish but I'm trying to let him do his thing and be strong for him now.


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## lilesMom

I'm def not a saint &#55357;&#56842;
Not even close &#55357;&#56842;
My Oh prefers not to acknowledge the losses much
He is the strong and silent type &#55357;&#56842;
Drives me mad sometimes 
I used to think he wasn't even sad
But he feels it alright 
Just doesn't know how to express it
We all deal with things our own way
No way is right or wrong
Its just what we need to do to middle through it
We will come out the other side
I promise u and myself &#55357;&#56842;
From experience, it does get better
And u will feel better 
Take hubby cuddles even if ye don't feel like it at times
Its a good way to bridge any gaps between ye
But I'm a sucker for hugs anyway &#55357;&#56842;
I'm rambling now &#55357;&#56842;


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## lilesMom

Don't make any ttc decisions just yet.
I change my mind every ten mins on when Il ttc
I know its cos I'm a bit muddled
So I'm making no decisions till my emotions settle a bit
Xx 
U will know when u feel strong enough to go again xx


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## mrs.green2015

We're be really Ttc but ntnp this month. I can't use protection it just seems so wrong when we've been trying so long. So we agreed to that awhile ago. Just not sure when or if I'll go back to tracking everything and taking the medication. We're house hunting this weekend so it's a nice distraction. 

Also, I'm a bug sucker for cuddles. I always tell hubs I can't even be mad at him properly because when I'm upset I wanna cuddle with him because he's my safe place. Even if he's the reason I'm upset!


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## lilesMom

I know , me too.
Ruined many a good argument on me has cuddles, hee hee

How long hve ye been trying hon?
Are u on clomid or something else? 
If I'm being too nosy u don't need to answer me x
Everyone makes their own decisions on when they can try.
My bro and sil hve a beautiful 3 yr old girl who was conceived before af after mc
Hoping u get lovely surprise sticky bean xxx


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## lilesMom

Happy house hunting &#55357;&#56833;


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## BunnyN

Just wanted to say thanks for posting your experience. I am going through a natural MC. Natural is all I ever considered but things didn't go well for me so if I ever end up in this position again I'd like to know more about other options.


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## lilesMom

Thanks bunny n.
Sorry for ur loss hon.
R u ok? Did u hve a bad natural mc
Not that there is a good one, but I mean extra traumatic
Hugs xxx
I've had 2 previous d and c
Hopefully I won't hve to but if I hve to make the horrible choice again..
I'm not sure which id chose.
Medical management speeds things up in comparison to natural I think.
But doesn't work for everyone.
But it feels very long in comparison to d and c
I'm still having some bleeding 2 weeks later but not major.
But u avoid hospital visit and anaesthetic
So......
Even having had both I'm not sure which was best.
There isn't really a good mc I think.
We just do what we can to make it easier but
Its never good 
Hugs xx 
I rambled a bit, sorry &#55357;&#56842; x


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## BunnyN

I lost 2 litres of blood and went into shock so physically it was bad. Strangely enough emotionally I think it was not as bad as I expected, maybe because although sad I'm feeling blessed to still be here with OH and our two LOs. If I knew the same wasn't going to happen again I'd do natural again any day as I hate the idea of surgery and feel the natural process allows some kind of closure for me, but it got a bit close for comfort. Hopefully it will never happen again anyway but I think we need to come up with a plan just in case before we can feel comfortable with TTC again.

Sorry for your losses. I agree there is no good MC.


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## mrs.green2015

So sorry bunny!

I was on Black Cohosh (its like a natural Clomid) and progesterone. Weve been trying for about a year but I feel a little more positive because we actually got pregnant so its good that I know we can get pregnant.

House hunting was a bust! Hubs hated everything.


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## lilesMom

Hugs bunny that's awfull.
U could ask for medical management in hosp 
Due to ur history they would surely agree
Giant hugs xxx

Sorry house hunting didn't go well hon. Xx
Hope u find perfect one soon
Fingers for fast bfp XXX


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## mrs.green2015

Today was a rough day. I cried all day about everything. I feel so alone. Hubs works so much I don't even see him more than a couple hours a day while he's sleeping. Friends are busy with their families. It feels like the world is moving on and my life has stood still heartbroken.


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## BunnyN

So sorry you are having a bad patch Mrs.green. I am dreading the everyone else moving on stage. Because I had such a traumatic time everyone is fussing about me still. Even so I find it strange how most people never mention the baby, just how I am. I think people just don't know what to say but I sometimes end up feeling like I am grieving in secret. 

You lost a baby its normal to be grieving. Take your time, do you have someone you can talk to?


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## lilesMom

It does feel like people forget the baby doesn't it
Hurts when its all we can think about 
I suppose it was closer to us and more real to us
Since we were carrying bub.
I even got , maybe ur better off cod ur hands would hve been way too full.
( my lil dude is 2.5 with special needs )
I didn't even answer.
I know it was said cos the person was fishing for something good to say
It wasn't meant harshly but came out sounding very bad.
People get confused and blurt out stuff to cover their awkwardness

The world def moves on a lot quicker than we do.
Ur not alone though.
We r here xxx
We know ur pain and feel the same hon.
I promise it really does get better 
Even if it feels like it wont
Or even if u feel guilty at feeling better.
I will never forget my 3 angels 
But I will move forward.
U will think of bub one day without the awfull pain 
Hugs xxx 
But for now let yourself feel what u need to feel 
U need to work ur way through the grief first xxx
But if u feel too overwhelmed do ask for help xxx


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## BunnyN

People do tend to say the wrong thing. Mostly I am okay with that because I am just grateful they try to say something. I find the awkward avoidance worse. The only one I found really hurtful was 'its better like that because you can take proper care of the two you have' (we have a 9 month old and a 2.5 month old too). Thankfully it was said to OH, not me. Not sure what I would have said to that. This pregnancy was planned but even if it wasn't that's not the point.


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## mrs.green2015

Thanks bunny. As far as someone to talk to I don't really think I do. My hubs is amazing but he works every single day. I see him like 4 hours a day when one of us is sleeping. Everyone else seems to have forgotten.


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## lilesMom

My bro and sil hve a 2 yr old, 3 yr old , a 4 yr old and a 16 yr old.
They r most def taken care of exceptionally well.
Just cos ur kids r close in age doesn't mean u cant take care of them. 
But I think people say things like that cos they r at a loss as to what to say
So we let them off the hook &#55357;&#56842;


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## BunnyN

I think you are right, the friend who said it is in his 80s and a widower who never had kids of his own but he is very sweet with our two. I found what he said quite upsetting but I'm trying to let him off the hook.


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## mrs.green2015

I agree. Just because they're close doesn't mean you can't take care of them. I hope we're lucky enough to have our kids close in age. As of right now we only want 2, but that could change. Lol I want them as close as I can. I have an adopted sister and were only 3 months apart and it's amazing! We go through all the same things together. 

Today I'm feeling kinda overwhelmed. This weekend was rough and we were supposed to tell everyone on thanksgiving (this Thursday) so I'm worried about how it'll be emotionally.


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## lilesMom

Arrrhgh I had big post typed and it vamoosed
Doh

I'm sure there was no malice meant in the mans comment
If he is normally good natured it was prob struggling to find right words xx
Just like my sil, I think she just said first thing that popped in her head
&#55357;&#56842;

Mrs green having a sis so clse must hve been fab
Ye be like twins &#55357;&#56842;
Were ye adopted young ? Xx
Hope u start to feel better soon hon xxx
Are u taking physical care of itself 
Even if u don't feel like good food and walks 
It will lift ur mood in spite of everything
( not a cure but helps xxx )
Internet people are people to talk to.&#55357;&#56842;
My first mmc , I found a great group here to talk to.
We still chat now, nearly 4 years later.
Big hugs hon xx
Do u like music?
I hve songs I listen to when sad and sing out loud to.
And cry to &#55357;&#56842;
Makes me feel better to release it xxx 

Are ye both ttc soon. 
I'm torn.
Between being gratefull for my son and doing blood tests and losing weight first.
( which I prob will )
But a little impulsive part of me wants to go now again !!!


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## mrs.green2015

I'm actually not adopted, she is. I'm trying to take care of myself. And I do love having my internet friends it's nice to be able to talk to people who are experiencing it or have. I've been watching Greys anatomy because it makes an cry but not about anything real. So I feel better lol 

We're ntnp this month and probably start trying again next month. Hubs asked me last night if I would starting taking the medicine again I told him I would. And he seemed happy about it. (We got pregnant our very first month taking it last time) I'm torn too but I selfishly really just want a baby.


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## lilesMom

That's what songs do for me &#55357;&#56842;
Glad u found something that lets u release without too much hurt xx
I must try watching greys , I never got into it first time round
But everyone loves it 

Ur not selfish at all for wanting a baby xxx
Totally natural unselfish to want that x
Hugs 

I picked it up wrong , its ur sis. X
That's nice to hve sibling so close xxx
I've 11 older siblings but closest is 3 years older.
I loved having company and want my lil dude to hve some back up &#55357;&#56842;
But we will see if I get my way. &#55357;&#56842;
2 mc this year is enough for me
Il wait till 2016 anyway and see from there I rhink
But I can cheer ye on xxx


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## BunnyN

I am fourtunate to have lots of suppoert from friends, family and OH but sometimers it is still a lonely process. There is some stuff I just dont know how to talk about. Some stuff is easier to talk about with the ladies on here because you know others are going through exactly the same thing so you dont have to explain it all.

After my first loss I was really conflicted about TTC. Ironically this time I decided pretty much instantly that I couldnt wait to TTC again and I felt fine about wanting to. Then I almost died and it has put everything in the air again. Not sure what to think now.


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## mrs.green2015

Greys is amazing! It's amazing for awhile then gets boring for s couple episodes then amazing again! 

TMI warning-

Today I've had lots of creamy cm. I know it's probably because my period is almost here. But I still secretly hope I'm going to get pregnant.


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## BunnyN

Hopefully lots of creamy cm is a sign your cycle is getting back to normal anyway.


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## lilesMom

Hugs hon. Xx
U will know when ur ready.
Last time it took me 3 months to feel ready again
First time I wanted to right away
But I had some tests done on my liver and had to wait for results
Then OH was away, so ended up waiting two months as well.
If I get back into healthy eating now
And lose some weight id feel better &#128522; about ttc


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## lilesMom

Sorry i missed a page.
Fingers crossed for u xx


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## lilesMom

Had to get another course of antibiotic
Infection wasn't totally gone.
Feeling very gghggrrr today.
Hoping its last of hormones leaving and Il get bfn soon.
I'm allergic to thoughts of ever ttc again today!!!
My lil guy had to get cast done for his leg today
( not broken, just keeps his leg in right position)
He roared and bawled through it.
I was crying by the end too.
3 if us had to hold him down to do it.
Not related to mc.
But the whole lot is getting to me today

Hope ye r doing better xx


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## lilesMom

Any luck Mrs green?
Hope u get ur wish xx


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## mrs.green2015

Got my bfn yesterday but for a week prior to that and a little yesterday I cried at everything!! Even radio commercials that weren't even sad! Hubs is sick so no Bd lately but that's ok. It's probably better for my body not to get pregnant this month. 

Hope you have a better day today and if you're in the states happy thanksgiving!


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## lilesMom

Maybe its a good sign of my body so &#55357;&#56842;
Thanks xx
I'm in Ireland but happy thanks giving too xx 
Are u feeling ok ish now? 
Hope so x


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## mrs.green2015

My emotions come and go. I'm ok now but waves of sadness. That's grief though so I understand. You feelin any better?


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## BunnyN

I think I have grief and days when its hormones all over the place too.


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## lilesMom

Yeah yest and today I'm a bit all over the place.
I've no patience and I feel like crying a lot.
Its partly grief
But mostly hormones and feeling crappy from antibiotic
Hope we all feel better soon xx


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## BunnyN

I hope you feel better soon. I had a couple of bad days but today was actually pretty good. I realised its the first day in 2 weeks that I didnt sob my heart out at some point in the day.


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## mrs.green2015

Bunny I had that same thing happen to me the other day, I made it threw a whole day! 

I hope you feel better lil! Your hormones haven't gone back down yet right? That very well could be a major part of it. Keep your head up as much as you can.


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## lilesMom

Thanks ladies.
Glad ye r getting there.
I got bfn yest and feel better emotion wise today.
My tummy feels weird though and some discharge again 
It had stopped.
Still on antibiotic, wish af would come now 
To make sure all clear.
I don't think infection is 100 % gone yet 
But could be paranoia &#55357;&#56842;
Better day anyway despite that .
Hope ye had good weekends xx


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## mrs.green2015

I feel the same about AF. Just hurry up and get here so I know I'm all back to normal. 

I've been sick all weekend. I'm about to go back to bed right now just got up for some lunch.


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## BunnyN

Congratulations on your BFN lilesMom. The things we veiw as steps forward these days would have seemed strange not long ago. Can I ask how long it took? I am still getting a pretty strong BFP. I have a feeling the MC isnt complete yet though.


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## mrs.green2015

At two weeks mine was pretty light. Still positive though.


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## lilesMom

Same here
At two weeks still bfp but lighter
Took 3 weeks for bfn.
Last two times took 3.5 weeks and 3 weeks
Both times I got af two weeks after bfn
Hope we all are sorted physically soon.
Xxx 
How long has it been bunny.
Sorry if I'm being a sieve head


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## lilesMom

Hope u feel better soon Mrs geeen x


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## bubbles82

Hi ladies, hope you're all doing ok.

I just wondered how long it was until your bleeding stopped completely, and how it was towards the end?

I've been so paranoid for some reason that things aren't complete. It's day 13 of bleeding for me today, for the last 4 days it has pretty much just been spotting, which looks more like mucus mixed with very small amounts of blood, but occasionally it's as if I keep bleeding small amounts of red again. A small clot came out again today so that could explain where the red was coming from, and the abdominal pains I was getting for the last few days. I feel like I've been expecting it to be the last day of bleeding for a while now but it keeps going. Last time I did a HPT a few days ago it was still very strong positive, I'm nervous of doing anymore yet. I think EPU said I have to wait 3 weeks after the bleeding started and they will then do a scan to check for retained products if a HPT is still positive. Does that sound about right or should it possibly be 2 weeks?


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## BunnyN

You sound about where I am now bleeding wise bubbles. The last few days have been mostly light brown kind of discharge. Once in a while it turns more pink, especially when I'm more active. Thismorning there was a little bright red with a small blood clot. I think that might be because of some herbal tea my MW reccomended to speed things up. She did say to expect a few cramps and a bit more bleeding. She thought my bleeding will stop in 3-5 days now. I got an almost BFN on monday and was getting blood tests that day so asked hcg to be checked. It was 16.5 so super low. Only about 4 days before when I last tested the line was still dark so it went down really quick once it did.


----------



## bubbles82

Thanks Bunny that's good to know, I might try another test tonight or tomorrow then. It's so rubbish seeing such strong positives knowing you're not pregnant at all, and that it just means it's even longer until you can try again.


----------



## lilesMom

I had an infection but only mildly up temp.
Very mild, u thought id no temp but doc sais it was up slightly.
Pain was my sign of infection , 
Plus I never really stopped bleeding at all.
Id atop for a day, then spot with mucous like u decribed.
I had a scan ten days after.
External scan, looked clear except for some lining.
I had a good bit of brown discharge last few days, 
A weird looking bleached looking smallish clot yest.
Then af today.
I think that tiny clot was causing my problem.
Scan missed it cos it was too small.
Id say get checked if ur worried.
They can take a swab to check for infection. .
But ur bleeding doesn't sound abnormal to me either hon.
If no pain or bad bleeding or smell.
Ur prob fine xx 
I had slight smell too, sorry TMI
Hugs
Sorry for ur loss xxx


----------



## lilesMom

Forgot to say I'm nearly 4 weeks on now.
Bit long to still be having bleeding
But it seems to hve run onto my af.
I've had two lots of antibiotic so should be fine 
Sorry for typos , on my phone xxx


----------



## mrs.green2015

Everyone is different. Also depends on how far along you were. I was 8 weeks and bleed for 8 days. But 7 of those days were very very heavy. I had a follow up with my doctor at a week and a half and she checked to make sure or no infection and check to make sure it all passed which it did. I was told not to try this month and wait until AF came. So doc never mentioned hcg levels at all I just took hpts on my own. Also, it depends if the baby stopped growing/ producing hcg before you miscarriaged or not and of course your levels before mc.


----------



## bubbles82

I don't know why but I've been convinced since the start that I'd end up with infection or incomplete mc. Probably because it's been so long and drawn out this time with it being a mmc rather than the bleeding just starting on its own, I keep just assuming the worst and expecting more problems.

I'm nervous of trying again in case anything is still left behind and it causes problems, but a lot of the time I don't feel like I can just wait a cycle without TTC either because of my longer cycles, it already feels like I've waited ages and it's only been two weeks since my medical management and I'm nowhere near ovulation yet, never mind AF and another ovulation!


----------



## mrs.green2015

It does feel like forever! It's den four weeks today for me and still no AF and I don't think ovulation yet either. I might be gearing up for this now though. So it does seem to take forever. Keep your head up and we're all hear if you need anything!


----------



## mrs.green2015

How's everyone else doing emotionally and physically?


----------



## lilesMom

I think u will prob know if u hve infection hon.
I had pain and slight smelly discharge.
U would get symptoms usually to show u hve
So hopefully ur ok xxx

I def didn't fully clear out this time till af.
But I could feel achy and had discharge the whole time.


I'm not too bad.
Half want to ttc this cycle
But I'm afraid and hve loads of reasons I should wait.
Waiting on blood tests results.
Losing weight
Waiting until my squish epilepsy semi sorted.
But my heart might win if blood tests results come back soon &#55357;&#56842;


----------



## bubbles82

I'm the same, my head says wait one cycle at least but my heart says no waiting!

In relation to infection, I have the discharge/spotting that doesn't seem to want to stop, I thought it was only 4 days now but just checked my chart and I've had it for 6 days now. Not noticed a smell yet but I did have pains for a few days this week, not had them today though so they were possibly in relation to the clot I passed this morning. Did an HPT tonight which has finally started going lighter though.


----------



## lilesMom

My pain was weird.
It was achy all over uterus tummy
But one spot in particular was sore and doc could feel it through tummy.
So it was a different pain to normal achy, crampy clot needs to pass pain
Weird description but .... &#55357;&#56842;
I've waited my first cycle out.
According to docs I can go now
But I'm dithering over waiting more or not.
Il see what my bloods come back with and decide 
Best of luck in ttc when u feel ready xxx


----------



## bubbles82

Thank you chick, same to you. In some ways I really hope my sensible side wins and we wait for a proper cycle, but I mostly just keep thinking how if I'm going to have another loss I want to get it over and done with as soon and possible so we can start getting some possible answers quicker, as it will be horrendous to go through again, but I know the referals and tests won't be a quick process either, and I really don't want to waste any time now I'm coming up 34 in a few weeks, so my chances of more mc are increasing all the time anyway just due to my age. I know this probably seems a strange way to think of it all and maybe not explained very well. 

I used another HPT tonight and they finally look to be going lighter now. This pic shows 6 days ago at the top, 4 days ago in the middle, and tonight at the bottom. Did anyone else use ICs? Just wondering how long roughly anyone thinks they might take to show negative?

https://i1256.photobucket.com/albums/ii497/kcbubbles82/Mobile%20Uploads/8EC68E7D-0EC0-440F-9C81-C8855AF538F2.jpg


----------



## mrs.green2015

I actually feel like my hcg went lower fast. But I think I lost the baby before I started Bleeding. Logically I know I should wait a cycle too and we said this cycle we would ntnp which is what we did. But this week I'm just going crazy and feel like I can't handle not knowing where I'm at in my cycle. So I bought opk and started temping. I think it's too late and maybe I ovulated already so I've been sad all day. 

Mostly sad because I would have been 3 months now, it's been 4 weeks and idk where I'm at in my cycle and because I think we missed o. Plus hubs and I work opposite schedules so I never see him. Just a rough day. But overall I feel a lot better emotionally. I feel happier and more stable.


----------



## BunnyN

That is about what my tests did bubbles. Then I tested after 4 days and they were very faint. Another 4 days on and I am still getting squinters but its very close to BFN. I've been doing OPKs too and they are getting darker, todays actually looked close to positive so not sure if my body is trying to o already? Just wish we could TTC already but I need to get the anemia sorted first.


----------



## bubbles82

I haven't tried any more OPKs yet as I randomly used one earlier this week and it was very very positive, the darkest I've ever seen one, but I know I wasn't near ovulation so I think it was the HCG levels or something and nothing to do with ovulation which makes me worried I won't be sure when they're accurate this time. I started using them at the same point with the loss before this one, and they were very negative straight away and stayed that way for a couple of weeks, hardly any line at all until I ovulated about 3 weeks after the bleeding started. So I'm not sure if everything might finally settle down a lot over the next week for me and my cycle get back to normalish, or if it might take longer this time due to the loss being later, and then part of me expects I won't ovulate at all this cycle. Would be great to have some idea what's going on! 

I've started temping again to try get an idea, but had a bad nights sleep last night, same again tonight as the weather is so bad it's keeping me awake, and DH has just got in from work at 3.30am and is being quite noisy, so I already know my reading will be off this morning too as DD will probably be awake soon!


----------



## lilesMom

My tests were really faint two weeks after
But took till 3 weeks for bfn 
All 3 times it took 3 weeks or over for my bfn
I think I ov ten days after mc 
Had my normal ov signs but was still bleeding 
Doc sais its not uncommon.
I got my af already.
It started end of last week.
Had lots of clots with it
So I'm hoping I'm clear now
I'm not sure id do medical management again to be honest.
The actual mc was fine 
But I obvs didn't clear everything out with it.

Hope ye r doing ok ladies xx


----------



## lilesMom

Hcg can def cause dark opk lines.
The only time I did them was after my first mmc
I got nearly pos for 4 days in a row cos of hcg
So I gave up on them.
I get ov signs anyway
I'm lucky un that 

I got my blood tests back from testing coz of mc
All clear
Except my thyroid gone lower but nit low
Which I already knew
Its good its nothing serious but annoying it doesn't help me make a baby


----------



## lilesMom

Il ba waiting another cycle to get thyroid and body back on track anyway 
Plus I had infection and clotty af
I wanna be double sure all clear
I'm gonna enjoy my Xmas without testing worry


----------



## BunnyN

I'm not sure what to think. I had a super dark positive OPK yesterday afternoon. Not sure if that means I'm ovulating? I'm still spotting on and off so find it hard to believe I'd be ovulating already. I know hcg can make OPKs positive because I am a POAS addict and experimented with lots of OPKs while pregnant just for fun:). That cant be what is causing the +OPK now though because I'm getting BFN, or close to now and the OPKs were totally negative a week ago. It could just be hormones sorting themselves out as I've had surges without actually ovulating before but never with such a glaring positive.


----------



## mrs.green2015

Mc messes up all these hormones! I started spotting last night but now nothing. Can't wait to start AF and just get this over.


----------



## BunnyN

Yeh, it gets confusing!


----------



## lilesMom

That sounds like u might be ov so hon.
I'm pretty sure I ov while bleeding and bfp.
I asked scan lady in hosp if possible
She said often happens 
I thought id hve to be bfn to ov
But she said no.
Um.....

My af started with brown spotting
Then a day of heavy brown discharge
Then af
Seems to be going now
But could just be a break

Seriously thinking of ttc this month
But I know I should wait
Argh.
Why cant I decide


----------



## mrs.green2015

I agree sounds like you're about to o! 

Liliesmom- why shouldn't you try v why do you want to?


----------



## bubbles82

I didn't know you could o while still bleeding either, it's all so confusing! I'm temping again now to try get some kind of idea where I am, I'm still spotting, day 16 since the bleeding started.


----------



## mrs.green2015

Sorry bubbles hopefully it stops soon!


----------



## lilesMom

I shouldn't try cos.
I should hve smear test
And make sure no more clots and pain
To make sure infection is gone.
Plus Ireland is bringing in paternity leave
If we wait one more cycle we should qualify.

I shouldn't wait cos
I don't want to &#55357;&#56841;


I think we will wait.
Oh really wants to wait.

I'm worried Il get chicken in meantime &#55357;&#56841;


----------



## lilesMom

Mine didn't really stop till af bubbles.
I read before ur bleeding had to stop for 20 days before af.
Seems like bull now cos my af came even though u spotted all the time
Xxx hope ur back on track soon hon xx


----------



## mrs.green2015

Obviously do whatever is comfortable for you and you have to make the decision yourself but have you thought about ntnp. Don't track your cycle and just have sex whenever with no pressure? That's what we did because I couldn't say no to trying but knew i shouldn't officially try.


----------



## lilesMom

I know exactly when I ov though so would be cheating &#65533;&#65533;
Hee hee
I never temp or opk cos I get really obvious ov signs.
I've caught first time three times out of four too.
So it would be trying really .
I think I can wait one more
I'm just a bit antsy now.
Thanks xx


----------



## mrs.green2015

lol you're a cheater! I wish I got some clues as to when it would happen. One cycle isn't too bad...


----------



## lilesMom

Yeah I've him down from waiting a few months to one more cycle 
Yest I was on the fence so I think Il be super healthy and get myself sorted for next cycle instead.
How are u doin now hon ?


----------



## BunnyN

lilesMom said:


> That sounds like u might be ov so hon.
> I'm pretty sure I ov while bleeding and bfp.
> I asked scan lady in hosp if possible
> She said often happens
> I thought id hve to be bfn to ov
> But she said no.
> Um.....

Thanks thats really helpful. Everything points to it being ov, except the fact my bleeding hasnt totally stopped and I find it hard to believe it could be so quick, especially seeing as I am still breastfeeding which usually makes my cycles super long. Like I say I've had LH surges without ov before because of the breastfeeding stopping the surge before I managed to ov but that was always a very brief and not very dark positive this one was super clear and is still positive today, though not as dark. We are definitely not TTC yet because my body needs to recover and we need time to get our heads around everything that happened, and we were going to wait for my completion scan and to talk over what happened with a doctor first and all that sensible stuff. I was only doing OPKs to have an idea of what my body is up to and becuase I am a POAS addict, lol. 

Now here is the confesion. When my bleeding stopped a couple of days ago we dtd two nights running without protection. We knew it was naughty but I think we were a bit desperate for the closeness. After 3.5 years of not using bc and after all that happened I couldnt quite bear emotionally to use a condom the first time we dtd. OH thought there wasnt any chance I could get pregnant so soon. Infact the sex could be what made me bleed again slightly Saturday:blush:. Then I got the positve OPK the next day. I'm thinking its unlikely I will catch anyway but if it is ov there is an actual chance that I could, especially seeing as 3 out of my 4 pregnancies I caught the 1st month. I havent even confessed it to OH yet. I think I'll wait until af comes, or until testing time so I dont stress him for no reason. I am secretly really excited with the idea of getting pregnant again, which makes me realise I want to TTC again as soon as possible. I wasnt really sure how I felt about it after all that happened. I'll also be worried if I do get pregnant because I'm still really anemic and was suposed to sort that out first. If I dont get pregnant then I think its a good warning to be more careful until we are really ready, lol. Sorry for such a lonmg saga, just had to get it off my chest to someone, lol.


----------



## bubbles82

That all makes sense to me Bunny! I think I would find it hard to use condoms now too if we DTD, we haven't yet as I've been too nervous while still bleeding, but we miss the closeness too. Although we were told it would be best to wait a cycle, and we thought it was probably a good idea, it would just be too strange to actually prevent when we really want to have another baby. I keep thinking I should just leave it to fate, if it happens it happens, but part of me hopes it won't happen this cycle so the decision is taken out of my hands anyway.
I'm so nervous of another loss which makes me feel I'm not ready to TTC anytime soon, but there's never going to be a time when I feel ready to have another loss if that makes sense. I just have to hope our bad luck is done now x


----------



## lilesMom

Hope u get ur bfp hon. Xx
That would be brilliant &#55357;&#56841;
Are u taking iron all the time now?
Was ur count brought up much by transfusion
Or still very low
Hope ur body bounces back fast
And u get ur lil rainbow xxx


----------



## BunnyN

I'm glad you can understand bubbles. Now I'm feeling kind of irresponsible:blush:. It helps to know I'm not the only one who feels weird about using condoms. Part of me is really hoping to be pregnant but part of me will be relieved if I'm not.

I was going to go and get blood tests tomorrow to check my hemoglobin but its a holiday so have to wait until the day after. Last week it was 7.9 so hoping its gone up :/. I'm taking iron 2x a day and eating tons of iron rich food. I'm hoping the fact I'm not bleeding propperly anymore will help.

I didnt get a transfusion. I didnt even end up in hospital. Very long story but there was a big complication with the ambulances and hospital we wanted to go to. Short version is: First the emergency ambulance came and they treated me at home until stable but they couldnt take me to the hospital we wanted to go to so we called a different private ambulance service who came but eventually decided they didnt have conditions to transport me (could have said that two hrs before :/). A third ambulance service was called but by that time my hemorrhaging had stopped aqges ago. We also had a MW friend there and at that point she said the crisis seemed to be over and maybe we should stay at home. She said the only difference at hospital would be getting a transfusion and I could recover fine at home, it might just take a bit longer. Plus a transfusion always holds risks, I knew someone who died from one so was happy with that. It just means that my hb has a long way to come up on its own, and I shouldnt really be getting pregnant just yet :blush:. I am feeling so much stronger the last few days though so things must be improving.


----------



## mrs.green2015

Bubbles- I felt the same way! How can I prevent something I want so bad? We were supposed to wait one cycle too. I haven't tracked this cycle and our sex has been sporadic at best. The doc said use condoms but I could r being myself to. 

Bunny- I'm pretty sure you're adorable. I love your confession. But now you know what you really want. And I hope it turns out best for you.


----------



## mrs.green2015

I think this was already said. But how long until you all for your periods again? Normally mine would have come but I know mc messes it all up. So it's been 4 1/2 weeks and still waiting because spotting stopped.


----------



## lilesMom

Hugs hon. Xx
Glad u didn't hve to go to hosp but sorry u had such a hard time xx
Ur not bad for wanting to ttc hon. 
Giant hugs xxx


----------



## lilesMom

Mrs green last two times I for af two weeks after bfn
Which was 5.5 weeks first time and 5 weeks second time
This time I got it around 4 weeks
But it was very clotty 
Now I feel like infection is back 
So I'm not even sure that was proper af
Going to my doc tomorrow to let her decide &#55357;&#56841;
Ttc out of my head again.
After bad day of appointments with lil squish and feeling like crap myself physically.
Had to get his eyes checked today.
The woman checking his eyes asks , is he ur only child.
I say , um yeah only one at home.
She goes oh great so u can focus on just him 
Felt like saying, its not for want of trying, I've 3 angels
I know she didn't mean anything but why ask.
Does it change his eyesight.
Arggh.
Sorry rant over .
Hope ye r having better days
I'm still very see sawy.
But its when I feel sick I feel worse.


----------



## mrs.green2015

I'm so sorry you don't feel good and then have to put up with people like that. I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it but that's none of her business. You're doing an amazing job with your first and you'll continue to do amazing no matter how many more you have!


----------



## lilesMom

Thanks. 
She is nice really.
But it doesn't occur to people him being the only child isn't a choice.
Bit of a pity party for one for me thus eve &#55357;&#56841;
Cheering up a bit now.
Doc booked for tomorrow.
Hoping that its something one more lot of antibiotic can fix
Fingers crossed &#55357;&#56841;
How u doin today hon?


----------



## mrs.green2015

I'm doing really great! I can't believe I'm this happy about AF but I really am. I can't wait to Ttc again. 

Hope the doc fixes you up.


----------



## lilesMom

Oh did u properly get af.
I missed that , sorry
Hurray xxx


----------



## BunnyN

I missed that too, congratulations on af! It really does feel strange to congratulate about BFNs and af but it suddenly means a lot.


----------



## mrs.green2015

Thanks ladies. It does mean a lot. I'm glad I get to track, take meds and try again!


----------



## lilesMom

On two antibiotics now.
Round three of antibiotics
Sick of this lasting so long but I'm alright.
Hope ye r doing well.
Not sure if ever do medical management again after all this
No wonder it seemed easy , only half it came out!!!


----------



## mrs.green2015

That's insane! I can't believe you are still going through all that. I can't imagine. I'm so sorry.


----------



## lilesMom

I'm hoping the lots of clots over the weekend was the end.
Doc said if these antibiotic doesn't work.
She will hve to send me back to the hospital.
Fingers crossed &#55357;&#56841;
How u doin? Xx


----------



## bubbles82

Sorry to hear you're still having a rough time with this chick, I hope they get you sorted soon. I'm nearly 3 weeks on from medical management now and have a scan booked for Monday to check on how things have gone. Looking forward to some closure hopefully on the physical side of things. I've been getting positive OPKs every time I've used one since, so I think my levels are still all over the place, HPTs were still so positive I've given up using them!


----------



## mrs.green2015

Hcg can cause positive opks so chances are you weren't actually ovulating. It was the hcg since you were getting a really strong positive hpt

I'm doing good started taking the black cohosh again so that makes me feel happy I can start moving near the ttc section again.


----------



## BunnyN

lilesMom- sorry its taking you such a long time to get sorted. I hope this is it for you now.

I agree I did a lot of OPKs when I was pregnant just for fun. If you are getting a decent line on an hpt you will get a positive OPK.


----------



## lilesMom

Bubbles hope ur scan shows all clear xxx

Mrs green hurray for moving towards ttc xxx

Bunny hope ur feeling ok xxx

Getting more brown discharge again.
Never really stopped as such 
But slows down so i think its stopping sometimes &#55357;&#56841;
Fed up of it now, feels like ages.

Hve Xmas family dinner tomorrow &#55357;&#56841;
Should be nice
I hve 11siblings and 40 + nieces and nephews
Should be fun &#55357;&#56841;


----------



## BunnyN

I had a couple of bad days. Kids had a sick bug, OH wasnt well and I wasnt feeling well myself. I got uncomfortable cramps yesterday evening and freaked out a bit because it felt a lot like the MC cramps. As it turns out I think it was digestive cramps, I wasnt sick but felt a bit rotton and think it was my version of what the kids had. It went away on its own after a couple of hrs. TMI but even when I was having the MC the cramps were a bit like I had to poo. I remember a similar sensation when in labour too so I think that confused me. I'm still a little worried that there is a posibility I didnt pass everything (probably just being paranoid) so cramps and feeling rotton worried me. That and OH wasnt well so I had to look after the kids and the house on my own for two days which I'm not really quite strong enough for yet but I didnt have much choice. That meant the house got in a tip, which adds to the stress. I'm still bleeding red now despite thinking I had stopped last week and then getting positive OPKs and signs of ovulating so have no idea where I am in my cycle. I was suposed to get blood tests to check my anemia and hcg, a scan to check that the MC is complete and go to the dentist to sort a filling that came out this week but with OH not being well didnt get to do any of them. And its 4 weeks since finding out we lost the baby. So basically it was all getting on top of me a bit.

Today the kids are better, OH is better. My sister came and helped out with the kids and the house thismorning and things are generally just feeling much more okay again. Just wish the bleeding would go away.


----------



## lilesMom

Bunny not to worry u
But if ur still bleeding after 4 weeks id go for that scan.
I don't think it should last that long 
And with u already being anemic it isn't good for u xxx
Giant hugs xx
My doc did say it can take 4 to 5 weeks for some people but the longer it goes on the higher risk of infection 
Hope u keep feeling better and glad u hve some help now xx


----------



## lilesMom

My little guy is extra demanding at the mo
He is cutting a back tooth and its increasing his fits.
Plus the double antibiotics and the smelly discharge is wreaking havoc on me.
Feeling like crap today.
Hope its the worst point and I get better from here on.
Think it might be but could be wishful thinking &#55357;&#56852;

Hope ye r ok ladies xxx


----------



## lilesMom

I'm starting to think ttc would be crazy for me for a good while
And its making me sad.
I wish I could put it out of my mind for awhile but I cant seem to.
Ggggrrr.
If my second last mc hadn't happened id hve a 2 month old now.
If the last one hadn't id be in second tri.
Life is sucky sometimes.
Sorry I needed to wallow for a bit and get it out.
I've been a bit too upbeat during this and its starting to bite me in the ass 
Xxx


----------



## bubbles82

Hope it all gets better for you soon chick, surely the only way is up for us all soon! Wow what a big family you have, how do you remember all their names?!


----------



## lilesMom

Hee hee
Names are fine 
Its birthdays are hard &#55357;&#56841;
We di this dinner now instead of Xmas presents
So its nice 
We only buy then for god children and a few sneaky favourites &#55357;&#56841;
Same with bdays.
I hve 4 god children.

I'm getting mixed up between us all 
Ur at start of cycle with af now yeah?
Its exciting and sad to start again xxx
Best of luck in catching fast xxx


----------



## bubbles82

No not me, I'm 3 weeks post loss now but no idea where I am in my cycle, no sign of ovulation yet so I'm not expecting AF anytime soon unfortunately. I wish it would all hurry up as I wasn't sure if I wanted to wait for AF or just try again beforehand, but it feels like it's taking forever to even get the first ovulation done!


----------



## lilesMom

I'm sorry , I saw Mrs green name on bottom of page and thought it was she posted.
I'm on my phone so I hve to zoom in on the names.
Sorry xx 
Some people don't ov before af.
And then ov normally next cycle .
I waited 5 weeks last two times for af.
This time was 4 weeks .
So it isn't abnormal to still be waiting xx
I know the waiting I horrible though. 
Hugs


----------



## BunnyN

lilesMom said:


> Bunny not to worry u
> But if ur still bleeding after 4 weeks id go for that scan.
> I don't think it should last that long
> And with u already being anemic it isn't good for u xxx
> Giant hugs xx
> My doc did say it can take 4 to 5 weeks for some people but the longer it goes on the higher risk of infection
> Hope u keep feeling better and glad u hve some help now xx

Yeh thats what I've been worried about. Although bearing mind it was about 2 weeks before I passed all the tissue so if I count from that its only been 2 weeks. It is still niggling me though which is why I wanted a scan this week but with OH being sick I didnt get the chance. I will still be doing one soon though. Bleeding seems to have stopped thismorning, so lets see how long that lasts. 

I am totally lost with my cycle. I'm wondering if it is even possible this last week of bleeding was my first af. It had stopped for a couple of days and slowed to mostly brown spotting for a week before that before it started red again. I've never had positive OPKs before af before but some ladies do. I had signs of ov last week and positive OPKs so I might have ov'd but then. If it was ov I'd be due af Sun or Mon because my LP is short. But how I'll know its af or just the MC bleeding still I dont know. 

I sympathise with your fight between the logical and the emotional when it comes to when to TTC again. It seems like TTC gives a focus to get excited about which is about the future, not loss. I hope you are in a place to TTC again soon. In the big picture it probably wont take that long to get sorted but any wait seems like forever at the moment.


----------



## lilesMom

We were quite similar.
I passed sac which I count as day one.
Had nearly two weeks clots and bleeding 
Then down to spotting and discharge most days 
Then what i thought af , 4 weeks after passing sac.
I'm not sure it was real af.
But was like one except very very clotty.
Confusing after mc.
Everything goes haywire.
It comes back quickly enough though. XXX
Hope ur bleeding stays away now.
And that it's complete xxx

Yeah any imposed wait seems long.
But I so know its safer wait and will pass too .
Thanks x


----------



## BunnyN

Well had red bleeding again in afternoon. Well it was kind of between bleeding and spotting but is obviously still fresh blood, not old discharge. Today i've had nothing so far. I was out and had forgotten to wear a pad, so glad there was nothing. Wont be surprised if its back but at least it seems to be slowing.

Feeling better still today, just had a wobble when i was out and found the bill from our last scan in my bag. Aparently i hadnt used that bag since that day.


----------



## lilesMom

My phone switched b and b off when I tried to answer earlier
Stupid bleeding xx
Better out than in though.
Hope its done for u soon xxx
I've been wobbly enough too last few days.
The two antibiotics are making me feel pretty rotten.
Bleeding has stopped but discharge hasn't yet.
Sick of wearing pads.
Its been over 5 weeks.
I've been confused and dizzy last few days.
But the second antibiotic can cause that
My tummy feels really weird.
I think there possibly is something still there.
Hoping its antibiotics fighting infection 
But paranoid its not.
I'm supposed to ring doc wed and update so we see how it goes.
Think I will ask to be scanned again to be sure.
Wanted to avoid the hosp but now id prefer to be checked
Its going on too long I think.

Hope ye r ok ladies xxx


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## BunnyN

After the grief the uncertainty is the worst part isnt it. I usually know whats going on with my body but everything is so messed up now I dont know what anything means. Had red bleeding when I went to the toilet again thismorning, but that was it, it has stopped again now. At least its less often now but it worries me that something is not quite right.


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## lilesMom

I know
I still hve pain too so I'm wondering if I fection still there.
Or about to ov.
Or some left.
Crystal ball required for us both &#55357;&#56841;


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## BunnyN

At least I dont have signs of infection so far, thats an extra complication for you :/. I am bleeding more red today though. Its not like its anything to worry about in itself because its pretty light but its driving me crazy not knowing what is going on. I did get positive OPKs last week and my LP is only 7 days so if I did really ov my period is actually due today. But with all this on and off bleeding/spotting there is not really a way of knowing. I'm thinking if it keeps starting and stopping like it has been then its not af? if it carries on straight for a few days and then stops maybe it is.


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## lilesMom

Usually if its going on along time there may be clots to get out.
Did u get bfn?
Sorry my memory is really bad at the mo.
The antibiotic I'm on one of side effects can be confusion 
Def am fuzzy brained
Ringing my doc tomorrow.
She said do after antibiotic 
I'm gonna ask for scan again.
I don't feel right ay all
I had external scan and said just lining left.
I need to knos if lining went the weekend before last.
Did u get a scan scheduled ?


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## BunnyN

I've decided this is af. It feels like af, it looks like af, its not really like any of the bleeding I've had with my MC and it came on the day it should have done if my OPKs were right so it all seems to make sense. 

I did bloods yesterday and my betta hcg was 1.2 so I have my offical BFN. I was expecting that because it was 16.5 two weeks ago and I kept getting squinters but the last couple of days I've had propper BFNs.

I planned to book my scan yesterday morning but then what I think is af started so am putting it off a few more days. Would rather be bleeding less if possible if its an internal one and I was told 1st af might get rid of anything left so seems like a few days wont hurt.


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## lilesMom

Yeah if its af it could be clotty like mine and get rid of anything that might be left x
Hope its sorted for u soon.
My doc rang me this eve and said I should go for another scan to be safe
But swab was clear.
Confused now.
But better safe and hve another scan to be sure I think.
I want to make sure all lining that was left is gone.


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## BunnyN

Thats great swab was clear. Sounds like follow up scan is just a precaution seeing as things havent been quite straightforward for you.


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## mrs.green2015

So sorry this had been extra hard for you both! I couldn't imagine still dealing with bleeding. Pads are the worst! I feel so gross using them. 

My af was clotty and it really never is. So I think that's normal after mc.


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## lilesMom

Yeah I'm pretty sure scan is just I case.
I had big clots in my af.
First big clot was smelly so I'm not sure why swab clear

But I was after two lots of antibiotic.
So....
Not sure if that means I never had infection.
Just my body giving out about stuff left or not


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## BunnyN

Maybe it was a piece of the placenta or something that was infected, not actually you?


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## mrs.green2015

I agree with bunny. Maybe just part of the lining for infected and didn't spread all the way to you.


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## lilesMom

Yeah that makes sense cos I wasn't that sick 
Just sore.
It could hve just caused inflammation.
Thanks girls.
Should ov today.
Finished antibiotics.
Really thinking of ttc.
Hve had one af.
Was talking to hospital doc who said she reckoned I'm fine now
Since swab was clear and antibiotic done.
What do ye think?


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## lilesMom

She said fine as in clear after mc
I didn't ask about ttc
Cos wasn't thinking maybe I could at the time.


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## mrs.green2015

I'm not a doctor obviously but I personally would take that as all clear. But more importantly I think do what you believe is right.


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## lilesMom

I want to 
Now to persuade OH
Hee hee


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## lilesMom

OH wants to wait cos they might be bringing paternity leave into Ireland.
Stupid oh.
Its only 460 euro.
He could just take unpaid leave.
Bye bye excitement of ttc


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## mrs.green2015

Maybe if you explain to him it's such A small chance since you are ovulating he will.


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## lilesMom

Nope no go.
Operating with his brain for once
Dammit &#55357;&#56841;
I'm ok again today

Just got carried away with myself yest.

Hope ye r well xx


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## mrs.green2015

Sorry! But you can actively Ttc again next month?


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## lilesMom

I don't think we will for a bit.
We had said we would wait 
It was me changed my mind to be fair.
I need time to get myself back to normal I think.
I've been teary last few days.
I'm only starting to deal with emotional side properly now I think.
The physical part had me distracted.

How ye doin .
Hope ye hve nice weekend xx


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## lilesMom

Plus 3 parts of the recurrent mc bloods screen came back slighly off.
They want to retest in 3 months.
And my thyroid is a bit wrong 
So better sort them first.
That's logical me.
Wait until ov next month and Il hve changed my mind!!!


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## BunnyN

Yeh, I have a fight between logical me and ov me too.


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## bubbles82

Same here with the fight between heart and head over ttc! 

Hope you ladies are doing ok? I tested again today, 4 weeks on from medical management and still positive! Scan on Monday showed all clear so I wish the levels would hurry up and drop, I just want AF here already so I can feel like I'm having a fresh start.


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## BunnyN

Thats fustrating bubbles, has the line gotten lighter for you?

I'm fed up of af now. Its pretty heavy today and I'm just fed up of bleeding in general. Have been bleeding most days for over a month now. On a positive note I do hope this is going to sort things out and I will be back to some kind of regular cycles. Its a bit ironic that its not my cycles that are stopping me from TTC but it will at least be kind of comforting when they are back to normal. Its the silly anemia is what I need to get sorted before TTC and I think that is going to take a few months. At least once I have stopped bleeding I wont be battling against that so it should be easier.


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## lilesMom

Bubbles that is long.
I suppose it depends how high ur levels got to ,
How fast or slow they drop 
Hope its soon for u xxx
Least we could all get the physical part done then
And start healing xxx

Bunny u too hon.
Hope this is the last for u now too.
I was bleeding on and off ( mostly on &#55357;&#56841;) for over 5 weeks.
It sucks xxx

Not too bad here.
I'm settling down a bit again
Bit of a crappy few days.
But out the other side of it again.

Hope ye r doing ok xxx


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## lilesMom

Mrs green u still here
How u doin hon.
Hope its onward and upwards for u
Now ur back on stuff to ttc xxx


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## BunnyN

Yeh when I think of it, today makes 5 weeks since I started bleeding. I was pleased once I decided this bleeding was af, which I think. It is just getting to me now. I havent had heavy periods in years so I guess I'm a bit spoiled. I was expecting it to be heavy and last a week or so but I'm on day 6 and it is heavier than ever. I'm so ready to be done with it now.


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## lilesMom

Hope it stops soon hon. 
Hugs xx


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## bubbles82

I've had a small amount of spotting for the last 3 days, I was really hoping it was AF finally making an appearance but still not happening, so I'm wondering if it's just the mc still even though they said the scan showed nothing leftover. If it's still mc I've only had 8 days without bleeding in 4 weeks now, just want it to be over.


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## BunnyN

It could be af just getting off to slow start? I hope it either stops or turns into period for you. I've read a lot of ladies get a really heavy first period after MC but some ge a realy light one.


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## mrs.green2015

So sorry bubbles. My first period after mc I spotted a few days before which I never have had before. So hoped it'll be starting soon for you. 

In doing ok. We're bding but also trying to buy a house so we're been focusing on that stuff. I'll be oving ang day now so we should probably get to bding more.


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## bubbles82

Thanks girls, I'm still hoping it might turn into AF, I've never had three days of spotting beforehand before. Although if it is AF it's slightly worrying I haven't ovulated at all, I hope it hasn't messed up my cycles completely. It's so weird how different things have been with each of my three losses, you'd think I'd be an expert by now in what's going on but it's completely different every time, I only had bleeding for up to ten days and ovulated within three weeks with the other two, this one just seems never ending!


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## lilesMom

My scan showed clear too
But I still had two days of brown and a smelly clot ( tmi soz)
Before it turned into af.
Hospital told me clear except thicker lining.
My own doc said lining means some left.
There def was tiny bit left but I'm ok now since.
But urs I red isn't it?
So maybe not the same.
Sorry I don't hve proper answer to it.
Hugs xx
Hope its done soon.
U hve any pain?


Mrs green any luck on the house?
Xx
Its stressfull to hve both together.
But worth it when u find ur lovely home xx


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## lilesMom

My doc said its normal for some people to take 4 or 5 weeks to complete.
Xx 

Bunny hi xx 

Not sure what I'm up to &#55357;&#56842;
Trying to make myself healthy.
OH said we can try next month if we want.
But I've switched to allergic to it now again.
Just really don't want to do thus again.
If I could only get a guarantee of no mc next time.
Or a warning so I don't ttc 
Um.....


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## BunnyN

I'm with you on the warning or guarentee thing. Though if I'd had a warning before my first loss I probably would never have TTC and then I'd not have my two LOs...

Hope the house and TTC go wel for you mrs.green.

My bleeding is still fairly heavy but has finally eased a bit which I am glad of because I was begining to worry a little. I had 4 weeks of bleeding before af and it never totally stopped but so far there doesnt seem to be anything but fresh red blood. My MW had said that if there was anything left it would probably come out with first af.

I dont think it is too unusual not to ovulate before your first af.


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## lilesMom

Yeah mine came out with af so she is right there. Xx
Hope it continues to taper off and stops now xx

My lil guy just head butted me in the face and made my nose bleed 
Ouch. 
I've been crying lots today again. 
Started with being bopped !! 
But everything is setting me off .
I don't even want to be around my lil guy
Its making me feel like a selfish bitch
But I'm honestly just struggling with it all 
His meds just went up so he is a extra cranky too. 
Sorry just a rant to relieve my guilt.
Thanks xx


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## BunnyN

I get like that, there are days I cry because all I want is another baby and yet I don't have any patience for the two I've got. It allways passes for me after a while though. It usually means I need a good cry, a heart to heart with OH and a nap, then I feel okay again, lol.


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## lilesMom

I've had two out of three.
Not the nap yet, having tea while squish naps instead.
I feel more normal now

Thanks xxx


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## BunnyN

Glad your feeling a bit better now. I had an old friend visit today that I've not seen in a long time. She said that I'd been through a trauma and lost a loved one in death so to remeber it was okay to have bad days. I thought that was a nice thing to say.


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## lilesMom

That was nice xx
Oh took lil squish out fir a few hours.
I got loads done.
Tree decorated, house cleaned, dinner made.
Sitting down with tea now.
Def feel better now &#55357;&#56842;


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## BunnyN

How you doing today lilesMom? Hope its a better day :).


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## lilesMom

Yeah I'm much better thanks.
Minded my sis kids today.
4 yr old girl and 5 yr old boy.
And my 2 yr old obvs 
They r little dotes , couldn't be sad around them &#55357;&#56842; 
We exchanged our Xmas gifts and had a lovely day.

How u doin hon xx


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## BunnyN

Glad you had a nice day with family.

Af is finally showing signs of slowing so that makes me happy. It was actually so heavy for a couple of days that it was starting to worry me. I'm still bleeding fresh red so its not quite ready to stop yet but has been fairly light this afternoon. It is a relief that the end of bleeding is hopefully in sight at least.


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## lilesMom

Fingers for u hon xx
Mine went from bright red to gone within a day with af
Thought it might come back but didn't
Felt a bit af like today but its not due til the 30 th
But anything can happen after mc &#55357;&#56842;


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## BunnyN

Ah, that is good to know about going from red to stopping quickly. Maybe mine will stop quicker than I think. I had a bit of heavy bright red thismorning but its gotten less and less through the day and is hardly anything now. I just keep expecting it to start up heavy again. Usally af starts with bright red but then turns dark and then brown pretty quick so I was kind of feeling like I could take ages to wind down still.


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## lilesMom

Hope its gone now hon
So it wont be bothering u over Xmas xx


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## BunnyN

Well its not extactly gone but does seem to be going the right direction.


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## lilesMom

Good good xx


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## mrs.green2015

Hey ladies!
You shouldn't feel like a selfish bitch at all! Just because you have children doesn't mean you're super woman. We all get overwhelmed sometimes no matter what. Especially dealing with adjusted meds and MC emotions. I couldn't imagine! My heart goes out to you both dealing with kids and this emotional stress. *hugs*

As for me it was such a busy weekend! We got the house (almost officially) so now the whole process starts and should be moving early Feb. 
Also, hubs showed up with a puppy on Saturday. He didn't talk to me or anything just showed up! Wasn't ideal but the puppy is super cute so he's staying. 
As for Ttc I'm over it. Cd 15 haven't ovulated and no sign of it. I keep getting "high" on digital opks but not a peak yet. It just feels like it's take so long because of the mc. We're getting close to a year of trying and I'm just exhausted from it. I talked to SO and he asked if I wanted to take a few months off and I said no because I really want a baby more than anything. So I guess I'm just at a stand still and need to figure out what I want


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## BunnyN

The kids keep us busy which is good in one way but being busy all the time can make it hard to work through and deal with the emotions. There are days when I just want some time to feel sorry for myself or spend a bit of alone time with hubby and its hard to catch a minute. I have never really felt the need for much alone time before. I've always enjoyed being kept busy by them and we've always just taken the kids along to eat out, go for a walk etc but this seems to have worn us both down though and its hard to find the time for a good talk and cry together, or just some quiet time. Still I feel really blessed to have them. Our first loss came before the kids and I remember finding it really hard not knowing if/when we would have kids at all.

I hope you get your baby soon mrs.green. TTC can be a bit all consuming. Which is okay short term but must get a bit overwhelming long term. Maybe you could try a short break, like just one month off to give yourself a rest? Or could you go for NTNP for a bit?


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## mrs.green2015

Ya I think if it doesn't happen this month we might switch to ntnp. It's just hard because of his work schedule. We work opposites so I literally have to wake up in the middle of the night so we can bd. so ntnp would be more or taking a month off. So on one hand I want to on the other I just want it so bad I don't want to wait. If that makes sense?

Luckily I have a new puppy and buying a house to keep me occupied this month.


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## BunnyN

I would be totally the same. The idea of a break is nice but there is always the thought what if that month was 'the' month.

Enjoy your puppy :). What kind is it?


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## mrs.green2015

Exactly bunny! 

He's half German shorthair pointer and half walker hound. He's bread to be a hunting dog but he's more of a big baby lol


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## lilesMom

Congrats on ur house and doggy xxx

I'm taking a bit of a break from ttc
Some of my bloods were a bit off
Doc wants them redone in 3 months.
If still off be checking it out more.
I just cant hve another mc for awhile.
When I've lost some more weight
And feel strong enough to handle whatever outcome
Then Il go again.
All I feel is relief now we hve agreed on this plan.
My head was a hit melted from it all
I feel like I can go back to normal me now

Happy holidays ladies xx
Hope ye can enjoy them xxx


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## mrs.green2015

Happy holidays to you too Hun! 

Did the doc give you any ways to get your bloods back to normal? Or do you just have to wait it out?


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## lilesMom

No they were weird things out &#55357;&#56842;
Two to do with xlotting , one high, one low
High could be from being preg
Low one could be from aspirin
Third thing high was something to do with autoimmune testing or lupus testing
But my doc didn't know what it was
So I'm only going by vague google for that one 
No ways to help them settle.

I've hypothyroid and liver issues too.
So I think a break to get me more healthy
Physically and mentally is no harm.

I'm actually in a much better head space since I decided.
Its indecision gets me &#55357;&#56842;
Its not never, just on hold.
&#55357;&#56842;

Hows ur Xmas goin
Ours is nice but quiet
But its exactly how I like
Low key and no pressure 
Happy holidays guys xx


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## mrs.green2015

Well I'm glad you're at peace and happy with taking a break. You sound like you have so much going on it might be nice not to focus on Ttc too. Our Christmas was laid back and relaxing too. It was very nice to be home and not run around. 

Update on me- still no ov.... In an hour and half I'll be on cd 20. I'm frustrated and not sure if I want to ov still or just want AF to come and be anovulatary cycle.


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## bubbles82

It is so frustrating isn't it. I'm CD36 now and still no sign of ov or AF. I would really like for AF to just come now so I can start TTC with hopefully a normal cycle next time.


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## mrs.green2015

Hope you ladies are doing better! Thinking about you today


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## lilesMom

Hey &#55357;&#56842;
How u doin
Hows house buying going?
Ye found one right? Xx
Where are u at with ttc?

I'm such a flake, um back to ttc again this cycle &#55357;&#56842; 
I just wasn't strong enough before
Think and hope I am now.
Only cd 4 awhile, haven't started trying yet
But got my docs go ahead today &#55357;&#56842; 

Hope ye r all well xxx


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## mrs.green2015

Lol so officially back to Ttc? Doing anything special or just lots of bding?

Currently ntnp until end of February. Although I'm not very strong and already want to try without tracking. lol While I try to loose 25 pounds, do paperwork for our house and move. So yes we found one. An amazing one! We're currently in closing (45 days total) and will move by mid feb.


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## BunnyN

We are TTC too, lol. My anemia isnt perfect still but it has impoved a lot so decided it was close enough :).


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## lilesMom

We can keep each other company so &#55357;&#56842;
Tee hee
I'm getting a bit excited now
Hoping I get to big bump to rub stage this time &#55357;&#56842;
:dust: To us all 

Glad ye found a lovely house 
Maybe the buying will take ur mind off ttc 
And you get to second tri without noticing &#55357;&#56842;

Bunny glad ur anemia is a bit better
My iron went down while preg but not till well over halfway
So u should be able to build up while ttc and preg xx

Excited for us now.

On extra strength folic acid all the time
Starting aspirin when i get preg 
Other than that, we do our own version of smep &#55357;&#56842;
Hit day 10, 12 and 14.
Usually works 
Maybe one after ov for good measure &#55357;&#56842;


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## lilesMom

Should we start a ttc thread do u think?
Rather than loss support .
Just in case we upset people with ttc chat?
Id like to keep up with ye if that's ok? Xxx


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## lilesMom

I hve 3.5 stone more I want to lose.
I'm down 2.5 already 
So 6 in total 
im gonna keep doing it while ttc and preg
Just nor undereat by much if preg obvs
Its def doable.
While preg with my lil boy I gained 21 pounds but it was gone in 3 weeks
So I didn't put on fat weight as such
Sorry million posts


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## mrs.green2015

I'd love to follow you ladies over to Ttc if you move. Because although this month is our I may get back to it in February. 

I just started my period today which means I officially didn't ovulate last cycle. Once I ovulate then we'll start again.


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## lilesMom

Fingers crossed for ov this cycle for u xxx


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## mrs.green2015

Thanks Hun.


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## lilesMom

Thanks hon. Xxx
Really sorry for ur loss too.
I promise it does get better even though it doesn't feel like it sometimes xxx


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## lilesMom

If u want to ask Qs or vent
I'm here most days xxx


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## mrs.green2015

She's right. It gets better. And you'll have bad days but remember tomorrow is a new day and you're allowed to be sad how often and how long you want. 

So sorry for your loss.


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## lilesMom

How r u doing mrs green? X


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## mrs.green2015

I'm doing better. Cd 5 and AF is on her way out. Focusing on working out and loosing some weight since we're not trying this month. 
How are you doing?


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## lilesMom

I'm good hon thanks.
Rejoined local gym, walking loads , eating well
I'm physically feeling better than u hve un ages 
Cd 9 and we r gonna relaxed try this cycle &#55357;&#56842;
So a bit excited too.
But cautiously so.
At the mo, I'm hopefull things might work out this time.


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## mrs.green2015

That's awesome! We're autopsies to be ntnp but with our work schedules it doesn't work. We really can only have sex 1 day a week. That's pretty much the only day I see hubs.


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## lilesMom

U never know, it takes just one is we r lucky xxx
Fingers crossed for u xxx


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## mrs.green2015

Lol I hope you're right! It would be bad timing but I still just want is so bad.


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