# Went to see about getting Freya's gravestone designed



## Pink_Sparkle

Hi all, 

We lost Freya at 19 weeks, 3 weeks ago to pprom and had her buried in a lovely spot in our local cemetery. On the day of her funeral she was left alot of beautiful flowers, most of which has sadly died making her garden look a little bare. 

We'd been to a few memorial places and we've found a place that really understand what we want for Freya. We went back today to get a couple of designs put together and we are really happy with them. :kiss: 
We just need to decide which of the 2 we like best before going ahead to order it. 

As Freya is in a family plot (she's the only one in it) we are not getting a full headstone just yet. Instead we've picked whats called a Desktop or Wedge memorial. It sits flat on the grass and it later years when we buy a big head stone it can be moved down onto the grass and sit infront of it. We want it took as girly as possible for her.

We're really looking forward to having placed on Freya's garden. 

For those angel parents who had their angels buried (just out of curiosity)...what kind of memorial do you have in their place of rest? xXx


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## mandaxx

Hey hun, I lost my baby too early for burial but I've seen some little memorials in the cemetry where my daddy is buried. Some have what you described and other have a simple crosses or stone teddy bears. Anything you feel is right for her. You can get some lovely floral arrangements that are silk and never die. I wish you all the love in the world at this dificult time pet, and if you need to talk im here. God Bless little Freya xxxxx


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## Pink_Sparkle

Thank you hun. Hopefully her stone will be ready in a few weeks. Her little garden is really coming on now. We actually ordered her a big pink silk butterfly wreath for her funeral. It still looks good. Plus we've got some pink vases that you plant in the ground with pretty fresh flowers. We have some other little angels and butterflies in her garden too....Cant wait to see her stone though - it will be the finishing touch. I am so sorry for your loss and congratulations too on your rainbow xx


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## mandaxx

Thank you hun. I'm glad you have something nice and positive to put your mind to. Are you coping ok otherwise? xxx


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## Vickieh1981

You should be able to see Isabellas in my ticker but will try and add a better picture to show how it was to start with and how it is now.

I'm sorry you are having to do this. If you are anything like me then you will be obsessed with making her resting place perfect as it's the only thing we can do for them.


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## mandaxx

Vickieh1981 said:


> You should be able to see Isabellas in my ticker but will try and add a better picture to show how it was to start with and how it is now.
> 
> I'm sorry you are having to do this. If you are anything like me then you will be obsessed with making her resting place perfect as it's the only thing we can do for them.
> 
> View attachment 482745
> 
> 
> View attachment 482747

Well you most certainely have achieved that. This is the most beautiful grave I have ever seen and she was definitely born straight into Jesus ars. God Bless her and you xxx


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## mandaxx

Oh dear! I really meant arms! This keyboard is awful for skipping keys :-0 sorry xxxxxxx


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## Pink_Sparkle

Hey girls, I'm coping 'ok'...I'm still not back at work yet. I have days where I think 'today was actually an ok day...I can laugh, smile etc' and then I have quite dark days where I cry alot. It's just frustrating that I dont have any control over my emotions...I can never tell what each day will be like - such a roller coaster!....Lately my mind has been running over time with thoughts of 'What if I cant get pregnant again?' It took us soooo long to conceive our precious Freya (4 years!)...I dont want to replace my baby girl, she will never be replaced but we are really hoping to be able to try again in the near future.

Vickieh1981 - I am so sorry for your loss. What beautiful memorials your baby girl has. Even before she had her stone in place it looks very pretty. Isabella Grace would be so proud of what her mummy did for her. I'll try and post a pic of how Freya's garden looks just now. Freya was buried in a family sized layer so we are still waiting for the ground to settle. Freya is not having a conventional head stone like Isabella Grace - shes having a desktop memorial which is like a big flat granite wedge that sits flat on the ground....as Freya is in a family layer it means that if something happens to me or dh (god forbid) or if we go through another loss that person will go in layer...so eventually we will have a large family headstone. - Such a morbid discussion! :/ 

I hope you dont mind me asking....we would love to have a little fenced area with some pretty pink stones for Freya. How is the best way to do this? Isabella Grace's first memorial looks very neat and pretty. Is it just a case of putting down some plastic sheeting...getting a little fence and some stones? Also can I ask...Where did you get the pink stones from? Ive googled but cant seem to find them. I absolutely love her new memorial...absolutely gorgeous but completely unfair. Its obvious to anyone that sees it she is loved very very much xxx


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## Pink_Sparkle

Freya's angel garden...I took this a couple of days ago. The ground hasnt quite settled yet xx
 



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Freyas Angel Garden.jpg
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## mandaxx

It looks lovely. A proper angel garden for a proper angel :hugs:
What you are feeling is completely normal don't worry. You can be expected to not be sure how you are going to feel from day to day. It's good that you cry because it will help you. Don't worry about feeling that you are replacing Freya, it's natural that you will feel that, because we always feel guilt but you are just wanting to make another angel :angelnot:
Can I ask why it took so long to concieve? If it's personal or too painful feel free to ignore me. I hope you feel better soon hun. You could try asking a memorial mason about the pink stones, they should be able to help you xoxox


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## Pink_Sparkle

I never thought about asking the memorial mason about the stones! 
Im not 100% why it took us so long to conceive but im pretty sure it was down to my weight. After a couple of years of trying we got referred to the hospital but they said my weight was a big factor and before they would run any tests I would need to loose weight. By this point I was getting really stressed out and down about not being able to get pregnant so we decided just to Not Try but Not Prevent for a while. We work alot of shifts and we're like passing ships so alot of the time we dont even share a bed! I managed to loose 3 and a half stone...we went away for the weekend in April to celebrate our wedding anniversary and 2 weeks later I found out I was pregnant! 

I really hope I can get a bit more weight off and we dont have too much trouble ttc again *fingers crossed* xx


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## LoraLoo

This is an old one of my DD on her Christening day, with Eve, so its a little different now, but you get the idea. For Alfie im going to get a sloping plaque in front of it x
 



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amy n eve.jpg
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## Pink_Sparkle

LoraLoo, Eve's garden is just beautiful. I am so so sorry your losses. Its so unfair. Can I ask where you got the glass box with the baby in it? Ive never seen anything like that before, its gorgeous xx


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## LoraLoo

Pink_Sparkle said:


> LoraLoo, Eve's garden is just beautiful. I am so so sorry your losses. Its so unfair. Can I ask where you got the glass box with the baby in it? Ive never seen anything like that before, its gorgeous xx

We got it made :flower: We bought her the musical doll for Xmas (3 weeks after she died) its a baby sat on a moon and it plays 'twinkle twinkle' we didnt want it to get ruined so we took it into a glass place and he was lovely he only charged us for the glass (about £10) not for making it. Condensation got into it once, so he made a whole new one free of charge and we had no problems after that xx


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## Pink_Sparkle

Wow, it is simply gorgeous. That was really nice of the person to make it for you too! xx


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## Vickieh1981

mandaxx said:


> Oh dear! I really meant arms! This keyboard is awful for skipping keys :-0 sorry xxxxxxx

It's okay. I noticed it and smiled. It was a fairly unfortunate typo but fortunately I am in a good mood today ;)



Pink_Sparkle said:


> Vickieh1981 - I am so sorry for your loss. What beautiful memorials your baby girl has. Even before she had her stone in place it looks very pretty. Isabella Grace would be so proud of what her mummy did for her. I'll try and post a pic of how Freya's garden looks just now. Freya was buried in a family sized layer so we are still waiting for the ground to settle. Freya is not having a conventional head stone like Isabella Grace - shes having a desktop memorial which is like a big flat granite wedge that sits flat on the ground....as Freya is in a family layer it means that if something happens to me or dh (god forbid) or if we go through another loss that person will go in layer...so eventually we will have a large family headstone. - Such a morbid discussion! :/
> 
> I hope you dont mind me asking....we would love to have a little fenced area with some pretty pink stones for Freya. How is the best way to do this? Isabella Grace's first memorial looks very neat and pretty. Is it just a case of putting down some plastic sheeting...getting a little fence and some stones? Also can I ask...Where did you get the pink stones from? Ive googled but cant seem to find them. I absolutely love her new memorial...absolutely gorgeous but completely unfair. Its obvious to anyone that sees it she is loved very very much xxx

Thank you - we are pleased with it. We put the edging down which we bought from ebay, then we put strips of perspex inside that to hold the stones in. Then we pinned down a membrane and put the stones on top.

We got them from here 

https://www.specialistaggregates.com/pink-individual-packs-c-35_131.html

Initially we had aspen - pink silk and in the second picture it's aspen - rose. We were really pleased with them. It took about 30kg for ours but it depends how much area you want to cover.



Pink_Sparkle said:


> Freya's angel garden...I took this a couple of days ago. The ground hasnt quite settled yet xx

It looks lovely hun.



LoraLoo said:


> Pink_Sparkle said:
> 
> 
> LoraLoo, Eve's garden is just beautiful. I am so so sorry your losses. Its so unfair. Can I ask where you got the glass box with the baby in it? Ive never seen anything like that before, its gorgeous xx
> 
> We got it made :flower: We bought her the musical doll for Xmas (3 weeks after she died) its a baby sat on a moon and it plays 'twinkle twinkle' we didnt want it to get ruined so we took it into a glass place and he was lovely he only charged us for the glass (about £10) not for making it. Condensation got into it once, so he made a whole new one free of charge and we had no problems after that xxClick to expand...

Its lovely Lora - I've always loved the glass unit on Eves grave.


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## LoraLoo

Vickieh1981 said:


> mandaxx said:
> 
> 
> Oh dear! I really meant arms! This keyboard is awful for skipping keys :-0 sorry xxxxxxx
> 
> It's okay. I noticed it and smiled. It was a fairly unfortunate typo but fortunately I am in a good mood today ;)
> 
> 
> 
> Pink_Sparkle said:
> 
> 
> Vickieh1981 - I am so sorry for your loss. What beautiful memorials your baby girl has. Even before she had her stone in place it looks very pretty. Isabella Grace would be so proud of what her mummy did for her. I'll try and post a pic of how Freya's garden looks just now. Freya was buried in a family sized layer so we are still waiting for the ground to settle. Freya is not having a conventional head stone like Isabella Grace - shes having a desktop memorial which is like a big flat granite wedge that sits flat on the ground....as Freya is in a family layer it means that if something happens to me or dh (god forbid) or if we go through another loss that person will go in layer...so eventually we will have a large family headstone. - Such a morbid discussion! :/
> 
> I hope you dont mind me asking....we would love to have a little fenced area with some pretty pink stones for Freya. How is the best way to do this? Isabella Grace's first memorial looks very neat and pretty. Is it just a case of putting down some plastic sheeting...getting a little fence and some stones? Also can I ask...Where did you get the pink stones from? Ive googled but cant seem to find them. I absolutely love her new memorial...absolutely gorgeous but completely unfair. Its obvious to anyone that sees it she is loved very very much xxxClick to expand...
> 
> Thank you - we are pleased with it. We put the edging down which we bought from ebay, then we put strips of perspex inside that to hold the stones in. Then we pinned down a membrane and put the stones on top.
> 
> We got them from here
> 
> https://www.specialistaggregates.com/pink-individual-packs-c-35_131.html
> 
> *Initially we had aspen - pink silk and in the second picture it's aspen - rose. We were really pleased with them. It took about 30kg for ours but it depends how much area you want to cover.
> *
> 
> 
> Pink_Sparkle said:
> 
> 
> Freya's angel garden...I took this a couple of days ago. The ground hasnt quite settled yet xxClick to expand...
> 
> It looks lovely hun.
> 
> 
> 
> LoraLoo said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Pink_Sparkle said:
> 
> 
> LoraLoo, Eve's garden is just beautiful. I am so so sorry your losses. Its so unfair. Can I ask where you got the glass box with the baby in it? Ive never seen anything like that before, its gorgeous xxClick to expand...
> 
> We got it made :flower: We bought her the musical doll for Xmas (3 weeks after she died) its a baby sat on a moon and it plays 'twinkle twinkle' we didnt want it to get ruined so we took it into a glass place and he was lovely he only charged us for the glass (about £10) not for making it. Condensation got into it once, so he made a whole new one free of charge and we had no problems after that xxClick to expand...
> 
> Its lovely Lora - I've always loved the glass unit on Eves grave.Click to expand...

Snap! We also had Aspen Pink silk to begin with (as in pic) but they did fade a bit so we replaced them with Aspen Rose. Now though the writing is a slightly different shade, but we need to get the other children (Amy and William) added on to her headstone- we put Love Mammy, Daddy, Caitlyn, Ollie- and then a blank space underneath as we knew we wanted at least 1 rainbow. So when i get them added i will just ask stone mason to go over all the writing to freshen n match it up xx


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## mandaxx

Pink_Sparkle said:


> I never thought about asking the memorial mason about the stones!
> Im not 100% why it took us so long to conceive but im pretty sure it was down to my weight. After a couple of years of trying we got referred to the hospital but they said my weight was a big factor and before they would run any tests I would need to loose weight. By this point I was getting really stressed out and down about not being able to get pregnant so we decided just to Not Try but Not Prevent for a while. We work alot of shifts and we're like passing ships so alot of the time we dont even share a bed! I managed to loose 3 and a half stone...we went away for the weekend in April to celebrate our wedding anniversary and 2 weeks later I found out I was pregnant!
> 
> I really hope I can get a bit more weight off and we dont have too much trouble ttc again *fingers crossed* xx

Aw that's lovely chick and go you losing 3 stone that's amazing. I only managed 1.5 stone for my wedding, which is also in April what date is yours? I'm trying to lose weight myself, so we could maybe spare each other on and help each other out. This might be a silly question but not all ladies do it, have you worked out when you ovulate and tried then? It has always worked for me. Lots of luck to you, you deserve it xoxo


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## Pink_Sparkle

Vickie thank you for the site - that is exactly what we are looking for! 

Manda, my wedding was the 23rd of April. We got married in Cyprus - I'd love to get married again!! When we were NTNP I wasnt checking when I was ovulating but now we really want a rainbow and with our shifts etc I'll start using OPK's to try and take the guess work out it! xxx


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## mandaxx

We are the 21st :) We also wanted to get married in Cyprus but my mum moaned at me to have it at home. I wish you all the luck in the world for your rainbow baby xoxoxo


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## mandaxx

LoraLoo said:


> Vickieh1981 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mandaxx said:
> 
> 
> Oh dear! I really meant arms! This keyboard is awful for skipping keys :-0 sorry xxxxxxx
> 
> It's okay. I noticed it and smiled. It was a fairly unfortunate typo but fortunately I am in a good mood today ;)
> 
> 
> 
> Pink_Sparkle said:
> 
> 
> Vickieh1981 - I am so sorry for your loss. What beautiful memorials your baby girl has. Even before she had her stone in place it looks very pretty. Isabella Grace would be so proud of what her mummy did for her. I'll try and post a pic of how Freya's garden looks just now. Freya was buried in a family sized layer so we are still waiting for the ground to settle. Freya is not having a conventional head stone like Isabella Grace - shes having a desktop memorial which is like a big flat granite wedge that sits flat on the ground....as Freya is in a family layer it means that if something happens to me or dh (god forbid) or if we go through another loss that person will go in layer...so eventually we will have a large family headstone. - Such a morbid discussion! :/
> 
> I hope you dont mind me asking....we would love to have a little fenced area with some pretty pink stones for Freya. How is the best way to do this? Isabella Grace's first memorial looks very neat and pretty. Is it just a case of putting down some plastic sheeting...getting a little fence and some stones? Also can I ask...Where did you get the pink stones from? Ive googled but cant seem to find them. I absolutely love her new memorial...absolutely gorgeous but completely unfair. Its obvious to anyone that sees it she is loved very very much xxxClick to expand...
> 
> Thank you - we are pleased with it. We put the edging down which we bought from ebay, then we put strips of perspex inside that to hold the stones in. Then we pinned down a membrane and put the stones on top.
> 
> We got them from here
> 
> https://www.specialistaggregates.com/pink-individual-packs-c-35_131.html
> 
> *Initially we had aspen - pink silk and in the second picture it's aspen - rose. We were really pleased with them. It took about 30kg for ours but it depends how much area you want to cover.
> *
> 
> 
> Pink_Sparkle said:
> 
> 
> Freya's angel garden...I took this a couple of days ago. The ground hasnt quite settled yet xxClick to expand...
> 
> It looks lovely hun.
> 
> 
> 
> LoraLoo said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Pink_Sparkle said:
> 
> 
> LoraLoo, Eve's garden is just beautiful. I am so so sorry your losses. Its so unfair. Can I ask where you got the glass box with the baby in it? Ive never seen anything like that before, its gorgeous xxClick to expand...
> 
> We got it made :flower: We bought her the musical doll for Xmas (3 weeks after she died) its a baby sat on a moon and it plays 'twinkle twinkle' we didnt want it to get ruined so we took it into a glass place and he was lovely he only charged us for the glass (about £10) not for making it. Condensation got into it once, so he made a whole new one free of charge and we had no problems after that xxClick to expand...
> 
> Its lovely Lora - I've always loved the glass unit on Eves grave.Click to expand...
> 
> Snap! We also had Aspen Pink silk to begin with (as in pic) but they did fade a bit so we replaced them with Aspen Rose. Now though the writing is a slightly different shade, but we need to get the other children (Amy and William) added on to her headstone- we put Love Mammy, Daddy, Caitlyn, Ollie- and then a blank space underneath as we knew we wanted at least 1 rainbow. So when i get them added i will just ask stone mason to go over all the writing to freshen n match it up xxClick to expand...

I just read your story about Eve and left you a little comment. I am so sorry and I wish you all the love and peace in the world xoxox


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