# I'm struggling to understand how this changes things



## LeeLouClare

Son has Autism?

I had an appointment a while ago with my HV to discuss my concerns with my son's development. She told me to ask my GP to refer him to a paediatrician. We saw her a week ago, she discussed his behaviour at home and watched him. 
She believes it's highly likely he's autistic but can't diagnose him on his first visit but has to referred him for help.

Now I had an idea he had some form of autism but its actually took me as a shock.
Maybe because everyone else told me he was fine and i was over worrying, but I'm struggling a bit even with the news or half news.
I keep getting told at least you now know but what do I do with this knowledge?? I has read up on autism but I'm struggling to understand and if i don't understand how can I help my son?
I have been in the process of starting my own business, and my mum seems to think I will have to give that up to care for my son but I have a husband to share the load with. 
Do I have to give up what I want to do with my life? I would do it if I had to but I do believe my mum is jumping the gun a bit, we haven't got an official diagnosis yet.
thank you for reading


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## marie-louise

It's a large spectrum, what age is your son, is he verbal? If your son is high functioning, meaning he is of average or higher intelligence, it is highly likely that he will be able to attend mainstream school and be independent to an extent, therefore you would be able to move forward with your own plans. If he has classic autism he may need more care from you or someone else, someone to take him appointments such as speech and language, occupational or physiotherapy. A child with classic autism may never be independent fully. In the mean time live your life with your child the way you have been, and enjoy him as he is now!


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## Misstrouble19

sorry to hear this news :( must be very hard to hear such sad news.. just know all the women are really nice on here and will help you ... hope you're okay and remember your son will always be your baby no matter what xx


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## AP

Hey hun,

It kinda depends on where the child is on the spectrum and how you view things/cope. You don't have to give everything up - not if you think you can handle things.

A diagnosis of autism is just an explanation - nothing changes ykwim - except access to support? If you guys are coping well, just live your lives how you are planning :)


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## sequeena

Well, how are you coping now? If you've been coping well life will go on as it has but with extra appointments. I think your mother is expecting your son to suddenly change. He's still the same little boy he was before this unofficial diagnosis. 

It's a lot to take in and honestly there's not much you can do yet.


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## Midnight_Fairy

The only thing ibfound that would be impossible to do while working was the statment. Many to but I put some hours into that. Xx im aware post 16 care is looming for me. Currently the college wont offer him full time so that would affect work for me.


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## LeeLouClare

My son isn't verbal. And doesn't understand a lot of things. he's 2 and a half though. so its early days. thanks for all your kind words


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## mummy2o

I'd say go for it. My son wasn't verbal at 2 and a half either. He was very easy going and enjoyed amusing himself. At 7 he really isn't much different, minus his language has come on and he'll ask for a drink instead of just giving you a cup.


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## TamTomPlusOne

Sorry I was reading this post and my daughter bashed the keyboard x


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## alibaba24

If your coping then why put your plans on hold ? 2 and a half is so young too you don't know how things will be. I would keep doing what your doing x


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## maisie78

Hi. I'm not in quite the same situation in that my dd has a different disability. She is blind, non-verbal and not yet walking at just over 2 years. It is a bit of a juggling act at times especially when it feels we have a different appointment every day to attend but I still manage to work part time and am starting am evening sewing course this week as I want to have a hobby thar has nothing to do with dd's care or work.We also have another baby due in Jan/Feb. You can do anything you want to do, especially if you have a supportive oh. It might be a little more work and take a bit more organising (never my biggest strength) but it's totally possible. Your son hasn't changed just because you now have a label. If you managed before you can manage now :) xx


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