# I don’t know who the dad is!



## Niash2

I am 10 weeks pregnant. I am due on 11.11.20. My periods aren’t totally irregular. My January period ended on the 17th. I had sex with a guy that isn’t my boyfriend on the 18th of January. On the 21st, 31st of January I said sex with my boyfriend, in February I had sex with my boyfriend on the 7th and 14th. I took a clear blue pregnancy test on the 22nd of February, it was negative. On the 27th I started bleeding it was just like a period. Then on the 20th March I took one and it said I was pregnant. I went to the pregnancy unit and got a scan and at the time they said I was 8 week and 5 days pregnant. Any help on who the father is?! please don’t judge.


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## Rags

No judgement ever, this is your life and no one else has the right to question how you live it.
I wish I could reassure you that baby was your bf's but it's awfully close to call. It seems that your original test was a false negative if your scan is measuring at 8 weeks five days - just counting back puts you right at that point in January when you were between partners, sorry. I think you've got that horrible 'wait and see' thing going on. Unless there are definite distinctive features when baby is born then a dna test is the only way to be sure. I don't know a huge amount about it but I think, if you are having other fatal tests done later on then they can do a dna test then (although that requires the potential fathers to donate too!) It might be worth looking for more information. Good luck uo you.


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## missielibra

Since you say you're ten weeks now, and the echo put you at 8 weeks and 5 days, I assume that echo was somewhere in early April? 

Is the 18th of January the only time you had sex with the other guy? (From what I'm reading it is). I mean, you can never *know* for sure, but a day after the end of your period, you wouldn't have been ovulating (some people might, but if you had a period that started around the 17th of January, if you had ovulated in the next few days after that you'd be a lot more than 10 weeks by now). Roughly to be 10 weeks right now, conception would have had to be around mid to late February. (So more likely the sex with your boyfriend on the 14th is what got you pregnant). 

Because let's say you ovulated January 24th (I'm letting the sperm <survive> 6 days). You'd be nearing 14 weeks by now. Echo can be off, but not 4 weeks off usually. Especially early on. 

Unless your echo was March 20th? And that's when they said 8 weeks 5 days? But even then, conception would have to be somewhere around 1-2 of february, and at that point, I doubt the sperm from January 18th was still alive.

You never know, but it sounds more likely that the dad is your boyfriend. Good luck with everything and I hope you have a good pregnancy :hugs:


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## Niash2

Niash2 said:


> I am 10 weeks pregnant. I am due on 11.11.20. My periods aren’t totally irregular. My January period ended on the 17th. I had sex with a guy that isn’t my boyfriend on the 18th of January. On the 21st, 31st of January I said sex with my boyfriend, in February I had sex with my boyfriend on the 7th and 14th. I took a clear blue pregnancy test on the 22nd of February, it was negative. On the 27th I started bleeding it was just like a period. Then on the 20th March I took one and it said I was pregnant. I went to the pregnancy unit and got a scan and at the time they said I was 8 week and 5 days pregnant. Any help on who the father is?! please don’t judge.




missielibra said:


> Since you say you're ten weeks now, and the echo put you at 8 weeks and 5 days, I assume that echo was somewhere in early April?
> 
> Is the 18th of January the only time you had sex with the other guy? (From what I'm reading it is). I mean, you can never *know* for sure, but a day after the end of your period, you wouldn't have been ovulating (some people might, but if you had a period that started around the 17th of January, if you had ovulated in the next few days after that you'd be a lot more than 10 weeks by now). Roughly to be 10 weeks right now, conception would have had to be around mid to late February. (So more likely the sex with your boyfriend on the 14th is what got you pregnant).
> 
> Because let's say you ovulated January 24th (I'm letting the sperm <survive> 6 days). You'd be nearing 14 weeks by now. Echo can be off, but not 4 weeks off usually. Especially early on.
> 
> Unless your echo was March 20th? And that's when they said 8 weeks 5 days? But even then, conception would have to be somewhere around 1-2 of february, and at that point, I doubt the sperm from January 18th was still alive.
> 
> You never know, but it sounds more likely that the dad is your boyfriend. Good luck with everything and I hope you have a good pregnancy :hugs:




missielibra said:


> Since you say you're ten weeks now, and the echo put you at 8 weeks and 5 days, I assume that echo was somewhere in early April?
> 
> Is the 18th of January the only time you had sex with the other guy? (From what I'm reading it is). I mean, you can never *know* for sure, but a day after the end of your period, you wouldn't have been ovulating (some people might, but if you had a period that started around the 17th of January, if you had ovulated in the next few days after that you'd be a lot more than 10 weeks by now). Roughly to be 10 weeks right now, conception would have had to be around mid to late February. (So more likely the sex with your boyfriend on the 14th is what got you pregnant).
> 
> Because let's say you ovulated January 24th (I'm letting the sperm <survive> 6 days). You'd be nearing 14 weeks by now. Echo can be off, but not 4 weeks off usually. Especially early on.
> 
> Unless your echo was March 20th? And that's when they said 8 weeks 5 days? But even then, conception would have to be somewhere around 1-2 of february, and at that point, I doubt the sperm from January 18th was still alive.
> 
> You never know, but it sounds more likely that the dad is your boyfriend. Good luck with everything and I hope you have a good pregnancy :hugs:

Hi, thank you so much for your help. I had the ultrasound on April 6th, that’s when they told me I was 8 weeks 5days. Yes I only had sex once with the guy on January 18th. That’s why I thought it couldn’t be him that I got pregnant by because after 5 weeks (after January 18th) the pregnancy test would come up positive if it was him, if it was my boyfriend it wouldn’t show up because I wouldn’t be pregnant yet. I don’t know if that’s stupid for me to think that.


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## Niash2

Rags said:


> No judgement ever, this is your life and no one else has the right to question how you live it.
> I wish I could reassure you that baby was your bf's but it's awfully close to call. It seems that your original test was a false negative if your scan is measuring at 8 weeks five days - just counting back puts you right at that point in January when you were between partners, sorry. I think you've got that horrible 'wait and see' thing going on. Unless there are definite distinctive features when baby is born then a dna test is the only way to be sure. I don't know a huge amount about it but I think, if you are having other fatal tests done later on then they can do a dna test then (although that requires the potential fathers to donate too!) It might be worth looking for more information. Good luck uo you.




Rags said:


> No judgement ever, this is your life and no one else has the right to question how you live it.
> I wish I could reassure you that baby was your bf's but it's awfully close to call. It seems that your original test was a false negative if your scan is measuring at 8 weeks five days - just counting back puts you right at that point in January when you were between partners, sorry. I think you've got that horrible 'wait and see' thing going on. Unless there are definite distinctive features when baby is born then a dna test is the only way to be sure. I don't know a huge amount about it but I think, if you are having other fatal tests done later on then they can do a dna test then (although that requires the potential fathers to donate too!) It might be worth looking for more information. Good luck uo you.

Hi. Thank you so much for your help. I didn’t make it quite clear, I had an ultrasound on April 6 that’s when they said I was 8 weeks 5 days. I don’t know if that changes anything? Please reply


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## missielibra

I mean, it's not an exact science, but if you put your dates (from the echo) here:
My Due Date is on or around Wednesday, November 11, 2020!

It puts you with a conception date of February 19th. Again, these numbers can be off a little. But I'd highly doubt they would be a whole MONTH off. So if the *only* time you had sex with the other guy was January 18th...I stand by my previous post, and I would find that highly unlikely. Again, you *never* know, but - I think it would be much more likely to think your boyfriend is the dad at this point. 

It's a difficult situation and I hope all will go well!


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## smileyfaces

If you had sex with the other guy only on the 18th january then the chances that its his baby are really slim. If you were 8w5d on april 6th then there really is no way it could have happened on january 18th.


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## Niash2

smileyfaces said:


> If you had sex with the other guy only on the 18th january then the chances that its his baby are really slim. If you were 8w5d on april 6th then there really is no way it could have happened on january 18th.

Thank you for replying. Yes it was just the once with that guy. My boyfriend knows about me sleeping with the guy but doesn’t think anything of it. So would you advise I tell my boyfriend about the possibility he’s not the dad or getting a DNA test?


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## Deethehippy

I would also suspect the baby is your boyfriends from the dates of the scan etc also the fact that it's unlikely (but not completely impossible) that you would conceive from sex right after your period. Only way of knowing for sure would of course be a paternity test when baby is born. Good luck with everything.


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## Bevziibubble

I would say your boyfriends.


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## smileyfaces

If its always going to be playing on your mind then you obviously need to


Niash2 said:


> Thank you for replying. Yes it was just the once with that guy. My boyfriend knows about me sleeping with the guy but doesn’t think anything of it. So would you advise I tell my boyfriend about the possibility he’s not the dad or getting a DNA test?

Personally i wouldnt because I really cant see any way that its the other guys baby. But if it will put your mind at ease to do a dna test then go ahead. The dates dont match up at all, there really isnt any way it couldbe the other guys baby :shrug:


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## Hihihi123

Hi, I’m new here and this is the first time I’ve ever used/posted on a form, so I don’t know if this is the right place to post, I don’t know how to create a new post! I’m in a similar predicament and would love some advice please! 

I am due to have my first baby on 25th December 2020..

I started dating a guy casually in January and we were non-exclusive but having unprotected sex (stupidly) as I’d always been told I would be unable to conceive. 

Anyway.. fast forward to March 7, I stupidly had a drunken 1 night stand with a guy I met at a club. 

The week later, the guy I was casually dating since January, asked to become exclusive and we entered in to a relationship, regularly sleeping together unprotected. 

On April 27th I found out I was pregnant, after missing my period on 21st April.. I think my last period before this was in March however I’m unsure if I actually had a period in March, which I put down to my PCOS and endometriosis which meant I don’t regularly have a period. However I’m now thinking I could have missed it due to pregnancy, and I’m really worried that the guy from 7th March could potentially be my baby’s father. 
How likely could this be?

One night stand: 7th March 2020
Due date: 27th Dec 2020
Ultrasound: On 15th June 2020 I was measuring at 12 weeks 1 day

Is it likely that the one night stand or is my current boyfriend most likely to be? I really do love him and we are so happy, i can’t shake the feeling that my baby may not be his and it has made my whole pregnancy so far anxious and terrifying.

Thanks in advance for any help and advice xxxx


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## Niash2

Hihihi123 said:


> Hi, I’m new here and this is the first time I’ve ever used/posted on a form, so I don’t know if this is the right place to post, I don’t know how to create a new post! I’m in a similar predicament and would love some advice please!
> 
> I am due to have my first baby on 25th December 2020..
> 
> I started dating a guy casually in January and we were non-exclusive but having unprotected sex (stupidly) as I’d always been told I would be unable to conceive.
> 
> Anyway.. fast forward to March 7, I stupidly had a drunken 1 night stand with a guy I met at a club.
> 
> The week later, the guy I was casually dating since January, asked to become exclusive and we entered in to a relationship, regularly sleeping together unprotected.
> 
> On April 27th I found out I was pregnant, after missing my period on 21st April.. I think my last period before this was in March however I’m unsure if I actually had a period in March, which I put down to my PCOS and endometriosis which meant I don’t regularly have a period. However I’m now thinking I could have missed it due to pregnancy, and I’m really worried that the guy from 7th March could potentially be my baby’s father.
> How likely could this be?
> 
> One night stand: 7th March 2020
> Due date: 27th Dec 2020
> Ultrasound: On 15th June 2020 I was measuring at 12 weeks 1 day
> 
> Is it likely that the one night stand or is my current boyfriend most likely to be? I really do love him and we are so happy, i can’t shake the feeling that my baby may not be his and it has made my whole pregnancy so far anxious and terrifying.
> 
> Thanks in advance for any help and advice xxxx

I know exactly how you feel but from all the online conception calculators I used, it said I didn’t get pregnant until around Valentine’s Day which mean there’s no way it could of been my one night stand in January 18th and I’m due November 12. Try online conception calculators they can give you an estimate. If you’re due at the end of December then you conceived in March which means you probably had intercourse in March that lead to your pregnancy. But because you don’t have regular periods it’s hard to tell when you were ovulating. Best thing is to be honest with your boyfriend and take a paternity test when the baby is born.


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## Flueky88

Hihihi123 said:


> Hi, I’m new here and this is the first time I’ve ever used/posted on a form, so I don’t know if this is the right place to post, I don’t know how to create a new post! I’m in a similar predicament and would love some advice please!
> 
> I am due to have my first baby on 25th December 2020..
> 
> I started dating a guy casually in January and we were non-exclusive but having unprotected sex (stupidly) as I’d always been told I would be unable to conceive.
> 
> Anyway.. fast forward to March 7, I stupidly had a drunken 1 night stand with a guy I met at a club.
> 
> The week later, the guy I was casually dating since January, asked to become exclusive and we entered in to a relationship, regularly sleeping together unprotected.
> 
> On April 27th I found out I was pregnant, after missing my period on 21st April.. I think my last period before this was in March however I’m unsure if I actually had a period in March, which I put down to my PCOS and endometriosis which meant I don’t regularly have a period. However I’m now thinking I could have missed it due to pregnancy, and I’m really worried that the guy from 7th March could potentially be my baby’s father.
> How likely could this be?
> 
> One night stand: 7th March 2020
> Due date: 27th Dec 2020
> Ultrasound: On 15th June 2020 I was measuring at 12 weeks 1 day
> 
> Is it likely that the one night stand or is my current boyfriend most likely to be? I really do love him and we are so happy, i can’t shake the feeling that my baby may not be his and it has made my whole pregnancy so far anxious and terrifying.
> 
> Thanks in advance for any help and advice xxxx

 I'm due 11/15 and ovulatuon occured, 2/23. You are fertile about 5 days prior to ovulation and up to 24 hours after. 12/27 is exactly 6 weeks from my due date so 6 weeks from my ovulatuon/conception date is April 5th. There is absolutely no way it is the one night stand's baby as sperm cannot live for a month within our bodies.


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## Chaotic6

Mama. 

I had sex with my ex husband in early November. 

I had a period 2 weeks later.

I had sex with my new BF a month later. 

1 month later I found I was 8 weeks pregnant. 

I beat myself up for quite sometime about it. So no judgment. Per your time line it sounds like it would be your bfs but you can always double verify with a paternity test but that risks him knowing.


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## Niash2

Chaotic6 said:


> Mama.
> 
> I had sex with my ex husband in early November.
> 
> I had a period 2 weeks later.
> 
> I had sex with my new BF a month later.
> 
> 1 month later I found I was 8 weeks pregnant.
> 
> I beat myself up for quite sometime about it. So no judgment. Per your time line it sounds like it would be your bfs but you can always double verify with a paternity test but that risks him knowing.

I think I know it’s my boyfriends now, like I don’t think a paternity test would help other than cause problems. When I had sex with the guy on January 18th it doesn’t match up. Also, I think I know valentines times day is the day that probably got me pregnant ( that is a whole month after I had sex with the other guy). I’ve asked loads of other woman who share close due dates with me and they have ALL conceived around the 20th of February.


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## Niash2

Chaotic6 said:


> Mama.
> 
> I had sex with my ex husband in early November.
> 
> I had a period 2 weeks later.
> 
> I had sex with my new BF a month later.
> 
> 1 month later I found I was 8 weeks pregnant.
> 
> I beat myself up for quite sometime about it. So no judgment. Per your time line it sounds like it would be your bfs but you can always double verify with a paternity test but that risks him knowing.

Was the babies your husbands in the end or boyfriends, because you had a period after your husband? x


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## Chaotic6

It was my boyfriends. I worried at first but after I did the math if it had been my ex husbands then he would have been technically a month ahead. I tried for 5 years to have kids with my ex and he has never fathered any children. At this point I would say he never will. I have since had 3 kids total with my boy friend now my fiancee and we are currently expecting our last!


Niash2 said:


> Was the babies your husbands in the end or boyfriends, because you had a period after your husband? x


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## Elaine Smith

Hi Everyone kindly assist. The first day of my last period was on the 18th April 2020. I don’t know when I ovulated. (I slept with guy #1 on these dates: 29, 30 April 2020 and 01, 02, 03, 04, 05, 06 & 08 May 2020).

I then slept with guy #2 on the 10th May 2020.

According to the ultrasound it says I’m due on 30th January 2021. Who could be the father? I can’t seem to figure out when I conceived. Your response will be highly appreciatedThank You.


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## lisaalove

@Elaine Smith 
Honestly it could be either guy. My due date is the 2nd of Feb and I ovulated may 11th. So if you're due before me then its possible it could be either one. However I would place more money on it being guy one as once the egg is released it doesn't hang around for too long.


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## Elaine Smith

@lisaalove thank Thank You so much for the response and for educating me. I’m expecting my first child and I know nothing about pregnant and what happens when a woman conceives. I’ll be very glad if it’s guy #1 and I’m praying it’s him


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