# How did you tell your parents???



## lilshortass

im 18, so i guess im not really young (in a sense, if u get me!) but my parents are going to go MAD when they find out im pregnant. i told my big sister, shes 26 and she had her first baby when she was 20, and shes been great. however, when she told mum, she told her to have an abortion and that shes ruined her life, and she still makes little digs every so often.
thing is, my sister was living away from home and had been for 3 years. im still living at home, moving in with my boyfriend soon hopefully.
im really worried and to be honest terrified about telling my parents as i know how angry and upset they are going to be.
thank god my sis said she will be there when i tell her, and shes supporting me brilliantly (i dunno what i would have done without her)
but i was wondering how did you all tell your parents? what was your situation and how mad did they go? or were they really supportive (as i believe parents should be...)
thanks!


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## Jo

Well i was 20 like your sister and had my own house and stuff
I just told them and they were brilliant, really excited and supportive and so were OH's parents

Good luck hun :hugs:


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## lilshortass

see thats how i think parents should be, mistake or planned, if you want the baby i think they should support you whatever. your so lucky that your mum was like that!
its mad comparing you to my sister- mum told her to have an abortion and that she was ruining her life...
i suppose really if my mum says the same to me (sis reckons she will but worse as im 2 years younger, sis also reckons mum will blame her!!) as she did my sister then i should just tell her where to go, cos if shes not gonna support me then surely its not worth me calling her mum, is it?


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## Jo

To me at 18 you are an adult and capable of making your own decisions
Ok your mum might not be happy about it but she should be there for you no matter what
I know you said you were shocked and it wasn't planned, so i am assuming you thought long and hard about what you wanted to do.

I think your mum will probably give you the 'while you are under my roof' routine, but as you said you are looking to move in with your BF, would it be possible to keep quiet until then?
Mind you i can't see how your mum hasn't noticed anything, sickness and stuff.
When are you thinking of telling her? what will your dads reaction be?

I'm sorry but your sis will probably get a lecture as well, I'm an older sister and i know!! :roll: 

let us know how you get on chick
we are here for you if you need a rant :D


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## stephlw25

I was 20 when i fell pregnant and dreaded telling my parents, i think i put it off until i was about 14/15 weeks. I went around one evening when my dad was working and it took me about 3 hours to get it out, i just sort of said "mum, ive got something to tell you, dont me mad at me !!" i was hoping at this point she was going to say "are you pregnant" to save me saying it but no she comes out with "oh my god you havent murdered someone have you?" :shock: :? :lol: hmmm how random !!

Anyway, she was fine about it, i think because i already lived with my DH so was more or less settled, if i was still living at home she probley wouldnt be so understanding!!! lol

I was going to say the same as Jo and maybe hold off telling her until youve moved in together? but as time is ticking on she may notice soon when you start getting bigger !! or if you leave it too late she may wonder why you didnt tell her sooner? i would say though if its worrying you or stressing you out etc, just tell them and get it out the way !?

Good luck however you decide to go about it, let us know how you get on! :)


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## lilshortass

thanks for your replies!
i wouldnt even consider abortion now, but i know thats what my mum will try and make me do (like she tried to make my sister) so thats one of the reasons im leaving it a long time to tell her - to hopefully stop her saying this (as it will be impossible), as i know its going to really hurt me if she says this.
and i am going to wait until i move in with my boyfriend till i tell them (he didnt seem to understand this at first- he thinks im 'stupid for being scared of my mum and if she doesnt support me then i should tell her to **** off' charming) but thing is im now wondering if hes really ready for a baby (he called me the other day as he had to wait for the bus for a couple of hours, and he told me really excitedly that he'd been shopping. i got really excited, thinking at last he'd bought something for the baby. but no, he blew all his money on clothes for himself. i have bought everything for the baby so far, and i dont even work! i sell random things on ebay to scrape together some money and i havent spent a penny on myself since i found out i was preg! its all been on the baby).
my dads going to be worse than my mum- he has attachment problems and so doesnt have unconditional love for his kids, he only loves them if they earn it. he doesnt love me (and hes told me many times, im a pile of ****, the black sheep of the family, a stupid little child who doesnt understand anything and needs to grow up... yep believe it or not these are actual things he reguarly says to his youngest daughter! ). my brother earned his love by going to uni. something i wont be doing in a hurry.

on a posative note- ive had a brilliant pregnancy! i only felt sick about 3 times and this was before i even knew i was pregnant, but havent been sick yet. always been really skinny, gettin a tiny bit bigger now but mum thinks its good im puttin on weight as i dont look like a skeleton!

they are on holiday till next mon, so im ok for now.

i feel so much better having found this site and being able to express my feelings to people who understand. thanks everyone and im sorry for the long posts!!


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## Jo

Hey girlie, don't be sorry for long posts, it does good to get it all off your chest
As for BF blowing all his money on clothes, i think we get more excited and want to shop for tiny things a lot earlier
What you need to do is get a babies r us book and leave it lying about, he'll soon realise the cost of stuff :wink: 

I am really sorry about how your dad treats you hun, i can't imagine how that must feel
The sooner you are in own house the better i think
and just out of interest what is your mum like with your sisters baby now?

If she loves her/him to bits just point this out to her that this wonderful child wouldn't be here now if she had her own way!!


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## weestar21

their is no real easy way of telling your parents its best you just come straight out with it, but the longer you leave it hun teh harder it will get.

I was mopre scared of telling the in laws second time round and i avoided them as much as i could when i was pregnant with Colby :oops: i had a neat bump and with a baggy jumper on you couldnt see a bump although i was pushing 6 months :lol: i was due in the mach and finally told them on new years day :shock: big shock to them no congratulations from them, they just said we were off our heads and beings stupid :roll: but their wasnt anything they could do, me and OH were happy and it was our life and our baby's.

but once they knew it was so much easier to relax :lol: 

If you find it very difficult to tell your parents why dont you try while they are on holiday to write a letter telling them its what you want just basicly writting down all your feelings 

im sure however you decide to tell them when the time is right for you, they might b a little shocked but im sure they will support you in your descision

take care hun
xxxxxx


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## lilshortass

my boyfriend told his dad, who was really excited (hes always believed in us, he thinks we're really good together), and we've yet to tell his mum. but apparently she'll be really excited. its both their first grandchild.

whenever my sister comes round, my mum sticks her kids (now 3 and 5) in the next room and goes on with her everyday life, computer, moaning, cleaning etc as if there not there. she doesnt really care about them. she never goes in the other room and plays with them or anything, like i do.

i know this is going to sound awful, but i really want a boy as my mums got 4 granddaughters and im hoping if mines her first grandson, she might like him a bit more? on the other hand im hoping for a girl for my boyfriends mum as shes only had sons.

im not sure what i want. i want a boy as then he will be the big brother (when we have more) and also ive not had much experience of baby boys, having only had nieces, so i think it will be exciting (yet scary!!) having a lil man, playing football and lil blue cord dungarees are sooo cute. also do they really pee in your face when you change their nappy?!?!?! but i also wanna girl for the usual reasons women want a girl- to dress in pretty dresses and do her hair, pink room and eventually (when shes older) have lil girly chats with.

a month and a day till i find out!!

anyway back to the point... i cant tell mum in a letter, as i think i owe it to her to tell her face to face. i dont really get on with my parents, but family means everything to me, and i do respect them in a weird way.

with my sis, they always (still!!) make digs at her and tell her shes ruined her life having her kids. my sis said it hurts real bad cos they have never supported her.

and the worst thing- my sis said that when she had her first baby, mum was there and when she held the baby for the first time (she was honestly the most beautiful baby i have ever seen!) she just had a blank expression on her face, no love or anything. my sis said thats stayed with her, and upsets her even now. i think thats awful and ive got it all to come :(


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## Jo

Aww hunny i feel for you i really do
your sister must hurt so bad, at least you will be there for each other
At the end of the day it will be your mums loss, she will miss out on everything and as your children grow they will notice it
I am glad at least your children will have a loving set of grandparents and it sounds like they will be there for you too

And yes boys do pee upwards, Jacks went over the couch and hit the wall :rofl:


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## lilshortass

aaaaahhhhhh!!!! thats mad!! so how many times have you been pee'd at? lol


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## Jo

Ooh its loads in the first few week, you learn the signs though!! :D


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## Spunky Cupkake

hi hun both of you together just go and tell your parents as the bigger your gonna get and you wont be able to hide that bump at least it will be off your chest and they can get used to the idea good luck spunky xx


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## lilshortass

havent been on here for aaaaaaages. but it all went well! mum went mad at first and didnt talk to me for a few days, but now shes fine. buying loadsa baby clothes and maternity clothes and stuff! yay!


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## Wobbles

I'm so glad things turned out well for you hun

& welcome back

:hugs:


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## Daniellemum2b

Well i'm 17, well 18 in 1 week...I just sat my parents down when they weren't so busy and when it was convienient for them, I just told them straight out that they we're going to be grandparents and i was expecting and at first they we're shocked and disappointed and a touch bit angry with me but then i made vows that i'd be a responsible parent and do all the changing and feeding and the night time thing and they've been sort of won around to the idea of me being a mum so it's not so bad:hugs:


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## Yummy Mummy Nat

As soon as I took the test at 4 + 1, I called mum and told her and she said as long as it was what I wanted then she was ok with it

I waited another 2 weeks to tell dad as I couldn't find the right moment :rofl:


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## Daniellemum2b

Lol isn't that just the luck?, my dad was the first to get angry with me..Kinda made me cry a bit :(


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## Imi

My dad gave me the " Trust you" look ...

Never really said much else ... prob had thoughts of an audi tt on his mind!

xxx


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## Vinny

i think you should just cume out with it, i did and i am only 16


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## Caroline

seeing this reminded me has anyone heard from lilshortass ?


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## Trinity

No .. she went into hospital coz she thought her waters had gone didnt she?

Hope shes ok.


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## Caroline

yeah that was her last post, not heard anything since. Bit worried about her.


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## Robyn_

Well, i was 16 when i fell pregnant with this little one. 
i did a test on the friday morning, i kinda knew what to expect from it though, i had to get ready for college, so i left the test sitting on my desk while i got dressed etc, because i had done test before, i just didnt think i would be pregnant at all, but when i looked at the test i was so shocked.. it was a BFP and i couldnt get my head around it, i had to keep checking the instructions to the test, reaad it through and through, but it was deff positive, told my bf at the lunch time, he didnt believe me(was over the phone) he said go get another test so i did. and it was the same. lol
anyways i didnt say anything to anyone when i got home only a few people knew
then the saturday me and oh fell out and my mum asked me what was wrong i burst into tears while eating my spaghetti on toast lol.. and she was like
"oh god no please tell me you arent pregnant" and started crying, and i couldnt look at her, and then she cried some more, shouted at me, laughed ALOT stared at me.cried some more,and hugged me.. and then she was like "we best tell your dad" and she rang him up and all he said was "nothing she does surprisesme anymore" thats about it really.
my mum has been incredibly supportive about it all and shes loving the idea of having a grandchild i thought she was going to kill me but she didnt lol
i had to tell my bfs parents to.. and it was hard.. cos she worked in the doctors where i had to go for my first anitinatal and she already knew when we walked in there (btw my bf was too scared to do this himself. cos he didnt know what to excpect or something) 
but i told her too and she aswell was so supportive to me and still is =) 

thats my story lol. hope you enjoyed


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## ColtonsMom

I'm 18 as well and I kind of just came out and told her. She wasn't too upset, more worried that I wasn't going to go to college.. which I assured her I was still going to do, and then she was fine with it.. she is mostly excited, especially because it's her first grandchild. My boyfriends mom however SAYS that she is excited but then gives my comments like, "You can go take medicine to start your period again.. it's not killing the baby.. *blah blah blah*" Which kind of sucks because me and Jamie, my boyfriend, live with her and her boyfriend. I'm hoping to move out soon though *crosses fingers*!!


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## Linzi

Im a bit older than you lot,Im 21 as of last week, but Im still terrified of telling my parents (especially my dad) on Saturday. I still feel too young to be doing this... still feel like Im 15! Hopefully it'll go ok though.

Hope everythings gone oke for everyone else telling their parents. We've got the in laws coming over in about 10 mins. My other half is bricking it.


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## alicesuckling

I was 18 whne i found out i was pregmnant and i was worrie dabotu telling my parents. I had recently moved in with my boyfriend who my dad hated and wanted nothing to do with and my mum jst thought i could do better really, When i told my mum she was very upset. She put the phone down on me and then calle dme back later once it had sunk in and she had calmed down and she talked to me liek an adult. My dad is another matter tho i've always been scared of him. i just cam eout with it, like pulling off a plaster, quickly works best.

I know its scary but really,.,,wats the worst they can do? they cant make u do anything they don't want. Just tell them it was a shock for u too but they'll have to deall with it like grown ups like everyone else has to.

good luck hun!


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## John

When my parents found out I was no where to be found. My girlfriend told my brother, which then they both told my parents.


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## mummy2b

When I told my mum I was crying my eyes out expecting a huge lecture and world war 3 and she turned round and said, "What you crying for, come down stairs and we'll talk about it"!!! trust me, parents are truly unpredictable!! I was so scared she was going to kill me, but as soon as she realised me and my boyfriend were serious she has been there for me!! (and i told her without my boyfriends there)!! It is better to tell her sooner than later i think!. xxx


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## goldlion

I was 18 when I got pregnant and was at that time, living far away from my parents. My mom always expressed to me that I would make a great mother, and that she would love more grandchildren and what-not, but certainly didn't expect me to become pregnant this young, just as she had done.

When I first told my mom, I called her RIGHT after taking the test (my mom is the best, very easy to talk to) and all I could say was, "Mom. I think I might be pregnant" I was super shakey in my voice as it was still setting in for me. She said "Why do you think that?"

Bahahaha.... I told her, "Well I took a pregnancy test and it's a plus. I think I'm pregnant" Then I just walked around the room going "Oh my god. oh my god. oh my god" She laughed and said congratulations.

My DH and I moved back to where my parents live and both of us grew up and settled into our own home. My dad still hadn't known yet, I was TERRIFIED of telling him. Since he and my mom started having children when they were 18, he didn't want us to do the same because financially, it was hard for them. At least until we all left home :laugh: Maybe we were spoiled..

Anyways, my dad got home from work and it was the first time he'd seen me since I moved back, I sat downstairs with my parents and blurted out, "I found out I'm pregnant, dad" and he quickly turned his smile into a stern face. He said "Is this one of your jokes?" I reassured him it wasn't and that I had just been to the doctors to confirm it. He was upset, he didn't say much, and that's how I knew. It's taken him until almost now to get comfortable with the idea that he'll be a granddad again, but he's very happy about it now. He insists if it's a boy, he's going to be a professional golfer and his name will be Lion because Lion's are bigger than Tiger's... bahaha! :)


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## Linzi

mummy2b said:


> When I told my mum I was crying my eyes out expecting a huge lecture and world war 3 and she turned round and said, "What you crying for, come down stairs and we'll talk about it"!!! trust me, parents are truly unpredictable!! I was so scared she was going to kill me, but as soon as she realised me and my boyfriend were serious she has been there for me!! (and i told her without my boyfriends there)!! It is better to tell her sooner than later i think!. xxx

Thats exactly how my dad was! I thought he would go mental but he was really happy. I was in tears before I told him coz I was so scared.

Parents are unpredictable


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## **ALRE&amp;Bump&lt;3

yeah parents r weird lol
if they c stuff on tv and complain, then u freak out if like that's what u've dun, in this case teen and pg and poop urself bout tellin them, then when it comes round 2 it theyre well supportive and everyfin


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