# How pregnant is "pregnant enough" for expectant mother parking?



## Menelly

I was going to the mall today, need a bigger bra (ack) and I had that rather sudden need to pee we all get first trimester. Well, lo and behold, there was stork parking right next to the door for the food court, which is where the restroom is in our mall. Yay! So I pull into the stork parking, go in to pee, and then get my shopping done.

On my way out, I go to my car and a lady stops me and tells me how wrong I am for parking in expectant mother parking. I say "but, I am expecting. I'm almost 9 weeks." To which she replies it's for "women more pregnant than I am". 

So... when are you pregnant enough for stork parking? How do you handle rude women like this? I didn't think I was in the wrong... I parked there so I could run in and pee quickly. But now I'm curious... is it only for women who are showing? Only third trimester? I'm not sure... what do you think?


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## Seity

Pregnant is pregnant. Next person who's rude you can tell them you're feeling queasy and would they mind if you puked on their shoes?


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## Menelly

LOL, thanks. :) I mean, I'll be fair, if I HADN'T needed to use the restroom immediately, I would have found parking further away. But I figured I needed the parking spot for pregnancy symptoms, which is what they're for... but she made me feel like an idiot. :( 

I will definitely go for puking on the shoes next time though!


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## SouthernC

Thats a good question, Ive been meaning to get my parking pass too!! As Seity said Pregnant is pregnant no one should question that.


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## MiissMuffet

She has no right to say that! i wouldnt be parking in an expectant mother carpark just yet personally as I know what its like to be ready to drop, huge and uncomfy with spd, so i would rather save the park for someone who needs it more than me, but thats not a rule thats just what i would do :)


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## pregochic

Yeh you have the right to park there. That lady was just being rude. Can you serously get a parking pass for being pregnant? Some stores here have parking spots for women with child but not all.


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## Menelly

MiissMuffet said:


> She has no right to say that! i wouldnt be parking in an expectant mother carpark just yet personally as I know what its like to be ready to drop, huge and uncomfy with spd, so i would rather save the park for someone who needs it more than me, but thats not a rule thats just what i would do :)

See, and normally I'd park further too. It's only cause I really needed the restroom! Normally, sure, I can still walk, I pretend that's my cardio, and I'd save it for someone who's further on without an issue. But... Yeah. I felt I needed it today and was yelled at for it. :(


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## Chelsea.ann1

I'd be so mad... how disrespectful... you could very well have been 9 months and just one of those lucky ladies who don't show... 

pregnant is pregnant..

I'd tell her if she knew anything about pregnancy or had any sort of right to say something she'd know that the first trimester is usually the hardest!!!!


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## MiissMuffet

Menelly said:


> MiissMuffet said:
> 
> 
> She has no right to say that! i wouldnt be parking in an expectant mother carpark just yet personally as I know what its like to be ready to drop, huge and uncomfy with spd, so i would rather save the park for someone who needs it more than me, but thats not a rule thats just what i would do :)
> 
> See, and normally I'd park further too. It's only cause I really needed the restroom! Normally, sure, I can still walk, I pretend that's my cardio, and I'd save it for someone who's further on without an issue. But... Yeah. I felt I needed it today and was yelled at for it. :(Click to expand...

If i was in your position and there wernt any carparks close i wouldve parked there too! 

It's typical though- every time i go to the mall with my bub in the car the parenmt carparks are taken. When i go by myself- the parent carpark is always free :dohh: Just thought i'd add that in there :haha:


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## mummykcc

I've only ever come accross one expectant mother parking space-it is unusual where i live! 

No idea how far along you should be to use one-if you are pregnant then you are pregnant! some people are rude.


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## RaspberryK

I've used the mother and child parking a couple of times (don't have expectant mother parking here) but only since I got massive and find it hard to get out of the car in an ordinary space. 
I have to say I would wonder why someone was using it if they weren't obviously pregnant but I'd never say anything because you don't know personal circumstances. 

x


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## JoJo_2012

Hell no you don't get to park in mother and baby parking at 8 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!

The whole idea of mother and baby parking is so that the doors can open wide and you don't have to walk children and toddlers through a busy car park.

I would say a pregnant woman should be allowed in mother and baby when her bump is so big she has to open the door SO WIDE a normal car parking space will not suffice. This is more like 7-8 months not 7-8 weeks ffs.

I'm glad that woman had the balls to say something to you I wish there were more people protecting those mother and baby spaces.

I suffer with crohn's disease, and believe me you don't know urgency to go to the toilet until you've had that and I still would not park in those spaces.


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## Eternal

JoJo_2012 said:


> Hell no you don't get to park in mother and baby parking at 8 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> The whole idea of mother and baby parking is so that the doors can open wide and you don't have to walk children and toddlers through a busy car park.
> 
> I would say a pregnant woman should be allowed in mother and baby when her bump is so big she has to open the door SO WIDE a normal car parking space will not suffice. This is more like 7-8 months not 7-8 weeks ffs.
> 
> I'm glad that woman had the balls to say something to you I wish there were more people protecting those mother and baby spaces.
> 
> I suffer with crohn's disease, and believe me you don't know urgency to go to the toilet until you've had that and I still would not park in those spaces.


I 100% agree with you in the case of mother and toddler spaces, it really gets my back up when people park in them with NO kids! I mean its so i can get my son out, not because its close to the store! Grrrr!

But in this case the OP was calling them expectant mother spaces, which I am guessing is a US thing for pregnant ladies. I would have to say i wouldnt personally park in it at 8 weeks, when your 30 plus weeks you will understand why, but thats just me, and if there are spaces provided for pregnant ladies then i suppose whatever stage of pregnancy your at you have a right to park in them. But i would have to personally say, i imagine such spaces would be there because of the fact when your bigger you will be uncomfy, in pain, difficult to walk, so i assume thats the reason for the space, where at 8 weeks your not any of those things (at least not relating to pregnancy), saying that, perhaps they are there for URGENT loo trips :shrug: Its a new concept for me. 

But as JoJo said, if it was mother and toddler then no, because you dont have a toddler, they are provided as you will well find out, that getting a baby out of the car and into a pram in a normal small space isnt helpful, plus, its safer because they have paths so you dont have to walk your toddler or baby on the road and its closer to teh tolley bay, which is always a nightmare (take trolley to car, unload shopping, take trolly and baby to trolley bay, and carry baby back lol). But Im guessing thats a whole other rant, as this was expectant mothers parking.


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## lesleyann

I have to agree with the last 2 ladys.. At 8weeks there is hardly any need to park in a prenancy parking space, they are made for when you need more room not just because you need to pee.. Before Kyle was born I always needed to pee but I wouldnt of parked of in a mother and baby or a pregnancy space untill I was to big to get out of the car in a normal parking space.


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## GingerNut

We don't have pregnancy spaces here, but I'm afraid I wouldn't have used one at 8 weeks. I'm no stranger to needing to pee urgently but that can happen just as easily outside pregnancy, and I wouldn't see it as an excuse to use the space. At 8 weeks you're well able to run if you need to go that badly!

Last time I was pregnant i developed SPD around 20 weeks. I had huge problems getting in and out of the car so even though my bump wasn't massive I needed to be able to open the car door all the way, and I had terrible difficulty walking - it was very painful and very slow. I'd regard that as a genuine reason to use a pregnancy space.


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## missmayhem

i'[ve been using them from 20 weeks if my SPD is bad enough for me to need crutches, the shorter the distance i have to go the better!!!! but at my local store there rarely used at all so i don't feel so guilty


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## Speccy

Menelly said:


> I had that rather sudden need to pee we all get first trimester.

Not wanting a debate as we don't have these spaces where I live, but if you think needing to pee is bad at 9 weeks, wait until you get bigger :haha: . (Not being rude or critical by the way - it just gets a whole lot worse!!)


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## RaspberryK

Speccy said:


> Menelly said:
> 
> 
> I had that rather sudden need to pee we all get first trimester.
> 
> Not wanting a debate as we don't have these spaces where I live, but if you think needing to pee is bad at 9 weeks, wait until you get bigger :haha: . (Not being rude or critical by the way - it just gets a whole lot worse!!)Click to expand...

Totally ... I can feel fine and then all of a sudden a bash in the bladder and I have trouble not peeing myself! 

x


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## Speccy

RaspberryK said:


> Totally ... I can feel fine and then all of a sudden a bash in the bladder and I have trouble not peeing myself!

Haha yes! And then 1 minute later you need to go all over again :haha: . Expecting it to get a whole lot worse for myself too!


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## RaspberryK

Yep ... I have a technique (sorry going OT here) sorry if tmi - when you go make sure you lean right forwards on the loo after you think you are done, I can guarantee you'll get some more out . It makes sure you empty your bladder and it helps stop UTI's. 

x


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## AP

8 weeks? No way. You'll understand in third tri ;)


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## AFC84

JoJo_2012 said:


> Hell no you don't get to park in mother and baby parking at 8 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> The whole idea of mother and baby parking is so that the doors can open wide and you don't have to walk children and toddlers through a busy car park.
> 
> I would say a pregnant woman should be allowed in mother and baby when her bump is so big she has to open the door SO WIDE a normal car parking space will not suffice. This is more like 7-8 months not 7-8 weeks ffs.
> 
> I'm glad that woman had the balls to say something to you I wish there were more people protecting those mother and baby spaces.
> 
> I suffer with crohn's disease, and believe me you don't know urgency to go to the toilet until you've had that and I still would not park in those spaces.

The OP isn't talking about mother and baby parking though. It's a parking space specifically designed for pregnant women. 

It's a difficult one, but there are tough times associated with all stages of pregnancy. At the beginning if you're really nauseous then you want to get in and out of the shops ASAP, but I also had SPD last time and walking any distance was painful. I suppose if I was early pregnancy and not feeling great, I'd still offer the space to a more heavily pregnant woman if she got there at a similar time.


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## AP

I mean, I understand these are for expectant mothers but if I had witnessed someone 8 weeks pregnant taking a space when i was in pain with SPD at 34 weeks....jeez....cue hormonal rant.
Bit of common sense needed really imo.


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## lori

To be honest, I would probably not use the expectant mother parking until I was much further along (if at all). Where I am, they usually combine the expectant mother/parents with young children parking, and it totally pisses me off when I'm trying to pack a baby and all his gear through the snow or whatever and I see someone parking in the spot who doesn't need it.


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## FeistyMom

While I joke a lot that you can be a 'little' pregnant or a 'lot' pregnant, it really is a either/or situation.

Everyone's pregnancy is different, and there are some great reasons to use the spaces in any trimester, as well as reasons not to. Last pregnancy I rarely used the spaces, even up until the end of third tri because I felt good, and needed the extra walking. This pregnancy, I'm barely in my 8th month and would use them now when they are available because I seem to hurt all over.

The issue isn't whether 9 weeks or 9 months is the right amount of being 'pregnant' to use an expectant mother space; the issue is that non-pregnant people use those spaces. No such thing as 'not pregnant enough' to count as pregnant imo.


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## Menelly

JoJo_2012 said:


> Hell no you don't get to park in mother and baby parking at 8 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> The whole idea of mother and baby parking is so that the doors can open wide and you don't have to walk children and toddlers through a busy car park.
> 
> I would say a pregnant woman should be allowed in mother and baby when her bump is so big she has to open the door SO WIDE a normal car parking space will not suffice. This is more like 7-8 months not 7-8 weeks ffs.
> 
> I'm glad that woman had the balls to say something to you I wish there were more people protecting those mother and baby spaces.
> 
> I suffer with crohn's disease, and believe me you don't know urgency to go to the toilet until you've had that and I still would not park in those spaces.

First of all, do not presume to know my medical history. I'm sorry you have crohn's. You do not know my intestinal issues. I had undiagnosed Celiac for years. I'm quite familiar with urgency, tyvm.

Second of all, they are not "mother and baby" parking, it specifically said "expectant mother parking". (With the accompanying picture of a stork.) There is no extra space to open doors wider, they are completely standard parking spots, just happen to be closer to the door.

And that's all the time I'm spending on presumptuous pushy people.

ETA: And for those saying "I'll understand in third tri", this is not my first child. I have a 13 year old. I've done it all before...


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## pambolina21

I agree Menelly....some of ya'll are being ridiculous and RUDE!!! She's pregnant and she parked in expectant pregnancy parking...In my opinion I don't care HOW far along you are...you have a right to that space....If another expectant mother shows up whose further along...then oh well...she got their first...if we all assumed our pregnancies are less important than other...then no one would be parking there and they might as well take that space away...

She went through an embarassing and uncalled for lashing by some stranger...she did NOT come on here to have to go through it again...if you don't agree with it then fine...but damn....sugar coat your words or DON'T RESPOND AT ALL!! 

We all know that hormones are running wild when your pregnant and to lash out at another is just wrong on many levels...imagine how you would feel if you started a thread and all of a sudden your being yelled at and ridiculed and being made to feel 2 inches tall...you wouldn't like it at all....

Menelly honey...you know I stand by you...I suggest you don't give this thread another thought and don't even come back to read anything....you don't have to go through that shit...

LOVE YA!!!! :hugs:


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## lesleyann

pambolina21 said:


> I agree Menelly....some of ya'll are being ridiculous and RUDE!!! She's pregnant and she parked in expectant pregnancy parking...In my opinion I don't care HOW far along you are...you have a right to that space....If another expectant mother shows up whose further along...then oh well...she got their first...if we all assumed our pregnancies are less important than other...then no one would be parking there and they might as well take that space away...
> 
> She went through an embarassing and uncalled for lashing by some stranger...she did NOT come on here to have to go through it again...if you don't agree with it then fine...but damn....sugar coat your words or DON'T RESPOND AT ALL!!
> 
> We all know that hormones are running wild when your pregnant and to lash out at another is just wrong on many levels...imagine how you would feel if you started a thread and all of a sudden your being yelled at and ridiculed and being made to feel 2 inches tall...you wouldn't like it at all....
> 
> Menelly honey...you know I stand by you...I suggest you don't give this thread another thought and don't even come back to read anything....you don't have to go through that shit...
> 
> LOVE YA!!!! :hugs:

Why should we have to sugar coat or just not respond? Its a public forum some people will agree and some would not.. It would be a bit like me saying because your TTC you do not belong here but its a forum you can post where you like and what you like :thumbup: (p.s I have nothing agasint you posting here just a point about saying others should keep their opinions to themselfs)

All of us who have responded are pregnant or pregnant and have already got children so we know what its like to need extra room/need to pee.. and im sorry at 8weeks there is no chance in hell in would think I was needed a pregnant space hell most of the time at 8weeks you have not even told people yet!


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## ovetta2001

Dear gosh some ppl are mean.

This is a PREGNANT LADIES PARKING SPOT

Not a mother and child.

Since when do you have to be 'so pregnant' to qualify as pregnant.

Shit while we are here let's decide the exact age is too old for a mother and child and just how disabled you have to be before you can say your disbled parking badge officially qualifies...


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## d1kt8r

OMG first tri and emotions are running ragged and look at what your saying its so mean!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you can say things in a nice round about way YOU NO.

EXPECTANT MOTHERS PARKING FOR PREGNANT WOMAN AND PREGANANT IS PREGNANT IN MY EYES, OH MABY SOME OF YOU WOULD LIKE THE SAYING "DONT JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER" you have no idea what she could be going through in the 1st tri!


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## Missalissa86

How 'bout the Patriots this year huh? Looks like it's gonna be a good season for football :)


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## Nicoleoleole

I think they are there for pregnant women regardless. I mean, I didn't when pregnant with LO as I could move perfectly fine, etc.
But let's say baby #2 gives me severe morning sickness at 5 weeks or something and I need to get to the bathroom before I :sick: everywhere. You bet I'm going to park there.

I think it should be 'pregnancy symptoms' parking. If you feel great while pregnant, don't park there!!


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## AP

The space for doors - so you can open your car door and get out easier and without whacking a nearby car

The proximity to the store - so you don't need to walk so far. I doubt it's so you can bolt to the toilets in time!

I just don't agree, sorry! But it's a forum and not everyone will agree with each other.


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## Missalissa86

Nicole your little girl is a doll! :) I love her hair! I bet its so fun to style, little braids or pigtails and those cute little hair bows and stuff! I want a girl! lol


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## kaiser246

edit


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## alaricsmom

For everyone not in the states, the spaces are not wider or anything of the sort. They are just closer to the door so a woman while pregnant does not have to walk a long way to the door. I personally know some of the issues the starter of this thread is going through and she most definitely should be taking it easy. If you have a problem with parking in expectant mother parking while your in your first trimester, that's great, but don't knock people who don't. The sign does not say, "parking for expectant women who have a bump." If the spot were meant for people further in pregnancy, it would say so.

You never ever know what someone is going through on the inside of his or her body even if there is a smile on his or her face. A few years ago my mother-in-law looked healthy, but had a horrible disease that caused constant pain in her body all day. She could barely breath. Would you yell at her because she parked in the handicap parking with her sticker? I sure hope not. Wait, she was not in a wheelchair or on crutches nor did she look sick. Fast forward a few years and she's on oxygen every second of the day. She only has one quarter of a lung and can barely walk a few feet without having to rest. In reality she only has a year maybe two left and has pain with every step. 

Next time before you start criticizing someone over something, it might be a good idea to ask circumstances before you just assume she is in perfect health besides her pregnancy. Sorry you had to read these comments. My mother-in-law dealt with them too and it makes me sad. This hit on more than one personal level here. You are entitled to your opinions, but they can be said without being rude or condescending.


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## JMRIII

We dont have them here, but it sounds like a good idea. :O 

I would leave them for women who are farther along unless there was a pressing, pregnancy related situation such as yours, in which case you are well within your rights to use such a spot IMO.


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## Menelly

AtomicPink said:


> The space for doors - so you can open your car door and get out easier and without whacking a nearby car
> 
> The proximity to the store - so you don't need to walk so far. I doubt it's so you can bolt to the toilets in time!
> 
> I just don't agree, sorry! But it's a forum and not everyone will agree with each other.

But you know what? That's polite disagreement. And I'm totally kosher with that. You don't have to agree with me! It's entirely possible to disagree without being incredibly rude, as you've clearly proven.

But to be fair again: there was no extra room for doors. It was the exact same size as the "regular" parking directly to the left of me, and exactly the same size as the "senior" parking spot to the right of me. The handicap stalls were of course larger, but this spot is not.

I appreciate your polite disagreement though! :)


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## Menelly

Missalissa86 said:


> Nicole your little girl is a doll! :) I love her hair! I bet its so fun to style, little braids or pigtails and those cute little hair bows and stuff! I want a girl! lol

I agree, she is a cutie. And go Ravens. ;)


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## TiredNurse27

You should have been more specific about what stork parking is, and maybe not ask people's opinions if you're going to go off on people for giving their answers.

In my opinion something like this would be designed for people who are heavily pregnant and have trouble walking long distances. 

All you've told us is that you needed to go for a wee and felt like using the spaces. 

I doubt that's the intended purpose of the parking spaces, I'd hate to be 9 months pregnant seeing you with your shopping while I'm struggling.


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## citymouse

I certainly think you were entitled to park there and dash inside if you had an urgent pregnancy-based need to pee. Depending on how you were feeling and if you planned to be there for a while, you could maybe have gone back and moved your car (which, granted, is a pain)... but I don't think you deserve to be yelled at for it (in person or on the internet). 

Obviously you have a conscience or you wouldn't be posting about it here, so as long as you followed your conscience I'm sure it was fine. And I'm sure on a day you felt fine and able to walk, you'd park farther back. 

That woman was rude to yell at you, but don't let it bother you. 

I don't believe I've ever seen stork parking around here. It's far more likely to see a plastic-surgerized woman in a Juicy sweatsuit double-parking her ginormous SUV in the closest spaces (and then dinging other people's car doors)!


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## amjon

I think you were fine to park there. You ARE pregnant. I have heard the fatigue in the first trimester is worse than later. I know I get so tired I go to bed by 7 almost every night. Sometimes I barely have the energy to even walk in the store. Just because you have a bigger bump later doesn't make you more entitled to the spot. (As for the child spots, sorry, but if you want to take your kids to the store deal with regular parking. You CAN leave them at home with someone else (even if you have to hire someone). If you're pregnant, you can't leave the fetus at home while you stop in the store.)


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## patch2006uk

amjon said:


> I think you were fine to park there. You ARE pregnant. I have heard the fatigue in the first trimester is worse than later. I know I get so tired I go to bed by 7 almost every night. Sometimes I barely have the energy to even walk in the store. Just because you have a bigger bump later doesn't make you more entitled to the spot. (As for the child spots, sorry, but if you want to take your kids to the store deal with regular parking. You CAN leave them at home with someone else (even if you have to hire someone). If you're pregnant, you can't leave the fetus at home while you stop in the store.)

What about if you're breastfeeding? You can't just leave your baby with anyone. They have to be with you, cos you've got the boobs. And even when they're older, why should they be left with someone else? 

I had a miserable first tri, with horrendous morning sickness, but no way was I more tired than by the late third tri, when I couldn't sleep, went to the loo 4 times a night, had restless legs so couldn't settle back to sleep and the baby decided 3am was party time. All things considered though, I had an easy pregnancy and was quite spritely compared to others I know!

I think using the space to go to the toilet is a bit much, but if it was to be sick I wouldn't bat an eyelid. Although I agree with a PP who said that maybe if you parked, went to the loo and returned to move the car, that would be ok.


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## amjon

patch2006uk said:


> What about if you're breastfeeding? You can't just leave your baby with anyone. They have to be with you, cos you've got the boobs. And even when they're older, why should they be left with someone else?

Sure you can, you can pump and leave milk. I will have to leave the baby at daycare, so I'll have to pump and leave it. They can still get the milk in a bottle. Small children do NOT belong in the mall. They get in the way of other shoppers and make messes that don't belong in the store.


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## alaricsmom

amjon said:


> patch2006uk said:
> 
> 
> What about if you're breastfeeding? You can't just leave your baby with anyone. They have to be with you, cos you've got the boobs. And even when they're older, why should they be left with someone else?
> 
> Sure you can, you can pump and leave milk. I will have to leave the baby at daycare, so I'll have to pump and leave it. They can still get the milk in a bottle. Small children do NOT belong in the mall. They get in the way of other shoppers and make messes that don't belong in the store.Click to expand...

Is this your first child? If so, you'll most definitely change your mind after you have one. Children are not a burden and should not be excluded from everything such as the mall. They are human just like you and me. I'll agree that it is easier to shop without my son, but I love taking him places with me. If he became unruly and started messing things up, I would just leave with him after making him clean up the mess. Yes, she could pump, but it's not as easy and more than likely, she would need to pump again before she left the mall. Not feeding your baby on time is very painful and not fun for mom or baby. Pumping at the mall is not an option as there is no where to pump except the bathroom....gross.


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## Nicoleoleole

AtomicPink said:


> The space for doors - so you can open your car door and get out easier and without whacking a nearby car
> 
> The proximity to the store - so you don't need to walk so far. I doubt it's so you can bolt to the toilets in time!
> 
> I just don't agree, sorry! But it's a forum and not everyone will agree with each other.

The spaces aren't bigger here in the US. Just closer to the stores :shrug:


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## Nicoleoleole

Missalissa86 said:


> Nicole your little girl is a doll! :) I love her hair! I bet its so fun to style, little braids or pigtails and those cute little hair bows and stuff! I want a girl! lol

Thank you! :) We put her hair in braids for the first time this past weekend. It's sooo cute!


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## Missalissa86

amjon said:


> patch2006uk said:
> 
> 
> What about if you're breastfeeding? You can't just leave your baby with anyone. They have to be with you, cos you've got the boobs. And even when they're older, why should they be left with someone else?
> 
> Sure you can, you can pump and leave milk. I will have to leave the baby at daycare, so I'll have to pump and leave it. They can still get the milk in a bottle. Small children do NOT belong in the mall. They get in the way of other shoppers and make messes that don't belong in the store.Click to expand...

I didn't want to jump in here without something nice to say but you are very presumptious. I'm guessing this is your first child. It sounds all fine and great to leave your child with someone else, but wait until you have your baby. It is very difficult to trust that someone else, especially someone you don't know, is going to give your baby the kind of care that you want for them. And children don't belong in the mall? Really? Children have just as much of a right to be there as you do. If you accidentally bump into something with your full-sized pregnant belly do you think you should be kicked out of the mall immediately? Accidents happen, kids are curious and very inclined to want to touch and look at things. It is your job as a parent to make sure that it is dealt with properly, not the childs. How unfair to stash a child away in the house and not take them out because you don't feel like doing your motherly duties and keeping a handle on your child while out in public. You're in for a pretty big surprise when you realize that raising a child is by no means text-book, it's not as easy as just following a game plan, and I hope for the sake of your baby that you figure that out very soon.


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## MiissMuffet

amjon said:


> I think you were fine to park there. You ARE pregnant. I have heard the fatigue in the first trimester is worse than later. I know I get so tired I go to bed by 7 almost every night. Sometimes I barely have the energy to even walk in the store. Just because you have a bigger bump later doesn't make you more entitled to the spot. (As for the child spots, sorry, but if you want to take your kids to the store deal with regular parking. You CAN leave them at home with someone else (even if you have to hire someone). If you're pregnant, you can't leave the fetus at home while you stop in the store.)

The fatigue in 1st trimester is worse than later? :rofl: Wait till you are 38 weeks pregnant.


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## Akinesia

Menelly said:


> I was going to the mall today, need a bigger bra (ack) and I had that rather sudden need to pee we all get first trimester. Well, lo and behold, there was stork parking right next to the door for the food court, which is where the restroom is in our mall. Yay! So I pull into the stork parking, go in to pee, and then get my shopping done.
> 
> On my way out, I go to my car and a lady stops me and tells me how wrong I am for parking in expectant mother parking. I say "but, I am expecting. I'm almost 9 weeks." To which she replies it's for "women more pregnant than I am".
> 
> So... when are you pregnant enough for stork parking? How do you handle rude women like this? I didn't think I was in the wrong... I parked there so I could run in and pee quickly. But now I'm curious... is it only for women who are showing? Only third trimester? I'm not sure... what do you think?

To answer your original question: pregnant is pregnant for expectant mother parking, according to the businesses in my city who supply these expectant mother spaces. There is no specification as to how far along for any business that I could find, just that you're pregnant. And of course you should use common sense and be polite. That means if you're feeling great, then don't park there and save it for a pregnant woman who's having a rough day. But if you're having symptoms of pregnancy (yes, urgency to pee can be considered a symptom), and feel so inclined to park there as a pregnant woman instead of wetting yourself in the parking lot in shame, then by all means park there. This is expectant mother parking. You are an expectant mother. The others can troll on you all they want, but you had every right to park there according to the creators of the space. 

If you're really worried about next time, you can call the specific business you parked at and see if they have any other rules to those spaces... I'm betting they won't though because that would be nearly impossible to enforce without requiring the users of the space to have something similar to a handicap sticker that is regulated. What would they do, whip out a measuring tape for your bump and make you pee on a stick? It's just common sense with these spaces. You use them if you're pregnant, and if you're feeling too unwell or unable to use a further space.


----------



## blessedmomma

wow menelly, love ya hun! you did nothing wrong. dont feel bad at all sweetheart. :hugs:


----------



## patch2006uk

amjon said:


> patch2006uk said:
> 
> 
> What about if you're breastfeeding? You can't just leave your baby with anyone. They have to be with you, cos you've got the boobs. And even when they're older, why should they be left with someone else?
> 
> Sure you can, you can pump and leave milk. I will have to leave the baby at daycare, so I'll have to pump and leave it. They can still get the milk in a bottle. Small children do NOT belong in the mall. They get in the way of other shoppers and make messes that don't belong in the store.Click to expand...

My baby has never had and will never have a bottle. Expressing is hard, I can only pump an ounce per session, so I don't do it as it's not worth the time it takes, and he's not getting formula. 

Why should I be separated from my baby just so I don't inconvenience other people in a shop?? Wait and see if you feel the same in a year's time. 

Oh, and not that this makes any difference, but I carry my LO, so others don't even have to get around a big buggy when we go shopping.


----------



## Speccy

amjon said:


> (As for the child spots, sorry, but if you want to take your kids to the store deal with regular parking. You CAN leave them at home with someone else (even if you have to hire someone).

Are you being serious :wacko: ?!!! Pay for a stranger to look after your baby while you pop to the shops?!!! And you think it's ok to tell breastfeeding women that they can just express their milk and leave their baby with someone else?!! There are all sorts of issues involved with breastfeeding and expressing - it's really not as easy as you're suggesting, and everyone's situation is different. And what about people who have no family or friends nearby to help look after their baby? ](*,) 

Personally I have much more of a problem with rude adults when I'm shopping - people who let doors close in your face, people who don't say thank you when you hold a door for them, people who just push past you or leave their trolley in the middle of the aisle. I'd much rather encounter a rowdy child or screaming baby.


----------



## Eternal

amjon said:


> patch2006uk said:
> 
> 
> What about if you're breastfeeding? You can't just leave your baby with anyone. They have to be with you, cos you've got the boobs. And even when they're older, why should they be left with someone else?
> 
> Sure you can, you can pump and leave milk. I will have to leave the baby at daycare, so I'll have to pump and leave it. They can still get the milk in a bottle. Small children do NOT belong in the mall. They get in the way of other shoppers and make messes that don't belong in the store.Click to expand...

LOL! clearly your first pregnany!

If you think your bad now at 9 weeks wait until 39 weeks! Yes 1st trimester isnt the nicest, its not the nicest becuase people usually dont even know your pregnant at 9 weeks, so your suffering and no one even knows. 39 weeks is so much worse, but at least people know your pregnant. 

As for just leave the baby with someone and pump, Im sorry but NO! I choose to have a baby and I dont dump my child off of anyone everytime i want to go shopping. I didnt breastfeed and still wouldnt have dumped my baby off everytime i wanted to do something. 

I agree we dont have a clue about expectant mother spaces, but that doesnt mean the fact we wouldnt park there until we were further along isnt valid, you asked opioions and we gave it. I wouldnt park until I was further along. Thats IMO. You actually went on and said, well you werent all the despirate for the toilet anyway, so surley the spaces are there for a purpose, perhaps you will understand when your later a long and really struggling, try having TWINS!

As for this becoming a US/UK thing, i gogogled expectant mother spaces and found loads of interesting debates and information, many US ladies expressing the same as us and others stating the see no need in them, your pregnant not disabled! Those are other peoples opioions, but its clear its not just a culture thing, many US citizens feel the same. 

I dont think the lady had a right to shout at you in the car park, (interestingly was she pregnant?) the spaces have no rules attached, so if your pregnant your pregnant, but common sense is needed i think. Im sorry if you have lots of problems, but so a lot of us, and I still wouldnt, even though my pregnancy is extremely high risk and having lost before. 

No one can stop you from parking there, so feel free to do what you like, but if you ask someons opionion you will next varied ideas of what is right and wrong is this situation. Good luck with teh rest of your pregnancy :hugs:


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## LeeBee

I'm 36+4 today. I'm fat, my back hurts, my feet are swollen, and I get nasty braxton hicks if I have to walk for more than 15 seconds. If I saw someone 8 weeks pregnant park in stork parking I would probably throw my keys at her. In fact, I had something similiar happen the other day. Some man parked is car in the only stork parking spot at the grocery store and I had to park in the very back of the parking lot. As I waddled by him I said, "I'd just like to think you for choosing that parking spot. Because I really enjoyed walking from way back there. Thanks."

I will aknowledge that there a certain circumstances where health reasons might warrent someone that early in their pregnancy to park there. But having to pee is not one of them. I have to pee EVERY minute of EVERY day.


----------



## citymouse

The problem in my mind with quantifying how much worse 38 weeks is than 9 weeks is that someone can always come along and say, "wait til you're 42 weeks!" to the person who's 38 weeks.

Those spaces are great, but you're just as likely to find them filled by people who are 2 weeks less far than you are as by someone who's 9 weeks. When does the margin get too narrow for debate?

It actually kind of makes me cringe to see pregnant women who are farther along acting like the first trimester isn't pregnant enough. It's kind of Orwellian... "all pregnant women are equal, but some are more equal than others."

Not to say I don't think third tri can be rough. But we can none of us know exactly what it's like to be another woman, so I think it's sad to come down so hard on the op. I've known 38-39 weeks pregnant women who felt quite good--probably better than a lot of women at 9 weeks.

However, I do think that mother and child spaces should be respected for what they are, and babies and moms are more than welcome at malls! All of my early jobs were in malls and I can tell you that it's the adults you wish would stay home, 90% of the time. Just send your cute kids! ;)


----------



## LeeBee

citymouse said:


> The problem in my mind with quantifying how much worse 38 weeks is than 9 weeks is that someone can always come along and say, "wait til you're 42 weeks!" to the person who's 38 weeks.
> 
> Those spaces are great, but you're just as likely to find them filled by people who are 2 weeks less far than you are as by someone who's 9 weeks. When does the margin get too narrow for debate?
> 
> It actually kind of makes me cringe to see pregnant women who are farther along acting like the first trimester isn't pregnant enough. It's kind of Orwellian... "all pregnant women are equal, but some are more equal than others."
> 
> Not to say I don't think third tri can be rough. But we can none of us know exactly what it's like to be another woman, so I think it's sad to come down so hard on the op. I've known 38-39 weeks pregnant women who felt quite good--probably better than a lot of women at 9 weeks.
> 
> However, I do think that mother and child spaces should be respected for what they are, and babies and moms are more than welcome at malls! All of my early jobs were in malls and I can tell you that it's the adults you wish would stay home, 90% of the time. Just send your cute kids! ;)

I get what you're saying. But i think it's safe to say that being 38 weeks is A LOT different than 9 weeks. So I think it just comes down to the person asking themselves, "Do I really need to park here?" Even now I don't use them if I don't need to.

I just personally thinking having to pee is not a good excuse. I can remember plenty of times when I wasn't pregnant when I had to pee really bad... should I have had the right to park there?


----------



## RoxyRoo

This is completely down to the individual to make their own judgement. I am 33 weeks pregnant and still haven't felt the need to use one of these parking spaces. I'm lucky though, in that I've had an easy pregnancy and most of the time I feel good :)

Regarding the needing to wee, I get this alot, and the added pressure of babys head pressing onto your bladder makes the desperation quite intense at times! I don't know why though, but to me even this wouldn't warrant me using one of those spaces.. I'd just have to walk faster to get to the toilet.

I see them as being for ladies who are ready to drop or suffering from pregnancy related mobility issues. Each to their own though, as I say it's the individuals decision to make.


----------



## Beaney192

My personal opinion in this matter would be that it depends on how you are feeling, I personally would not ever use them even now as I would always worry that I am steeling someone elses space. I just feel that this thread has got a little bit out of control as you must have wanted others opinions but im guessing you were hoping they were all one sided? 

Plus to the OP who said about leaving your child behind as they are not meant for the mall! Well this is stupid I have not decided to carry a baby for 9 months to then leave him at home every time i decided to go to the shops! This is my first baby and could not think of anything worse! Im going to want to spend all my time with him!


----------



## alaricsmom

I don't think she wanted one sided opinions. If you read previously she actually thanks someone for disagreeing but in a cordial manner. Some people were down right rude in how they responded. Disagreeing with her does not give a free pass to lecture her or be rude. You were not though. :) she was just looking for honest opinions not a harsh lecture I would imagine.


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## blessedmomma

menelly i know what your suffering with for this pregnancy beyond what you have said on here. i would not want to go through what you are dealing with hun. :hugs: and i know you werent looking for everyone to be on your side, just not out of control comments. 

i do have to say that i can speak as someone who has had it worse in 1st tri as opposed to 3rd tri. its ok to speak from your own experiences about how you felt during these times, but you cant generalize that to how everyone feels. i am on my 8th pregnancy and 6th child. i can honestly say every pregnancy is different. 2 of mine i had extreme morning sickness and exhaustion. felt 10x worse during those two pregnancies during 1st tri then 3rd tri. in fact with both of those pregnancies i barely left the house in 1st tri and by 3rd tri i took up extra walking and exercise cuz i felt so great. have had a couple pregnancies when 3rd tri was horrible too, but like i said they are all different. and for saying having to pee isnt an emergency in certain cases is just silly. after having 5 children i can honestly say i have been doubled over in pain from having to pee. it may sound stupid to some, but until you have been there-you really dont know. there are women who have had births or even surgeries that have effected their bladders and are in extreme pain from needing to pee

its kind of silly how angry this thread has made some people.:dohh:


----------



## rosie5637

crikey there have been some very harsh comments on this thread!

a little presumptious to think that someone will feel fine in the 1st tri and will feel crap in the 3rd not to mention patronising!

with my first pregnancy i was very poorly in the 1st tri and was playing tennis in the 3rd. so far in this pregnancy i have been even more poorly. i am so exhausted and dizzy that at times i can only walk a few steps and have to sit down. if those spaces existed here i would have NEEDED to use them from about 5wks.


----------



## Novbaby08

Hmmmm well if you had an emergency like that you are pregnant. But at the same time when I was pregnant with my daughter it always irritated me when here I was big as a whale and I would have to walk from a far away parking spot because a girl who wasnt showing yet took the spot. 
Its kind of a sore spot with me when I was 37 weeks I took a prenatal class and I was the only one in my 3rd trimester and they had us walk upstairs to the labor and delivery room where all the pregnant girls immediately took every spot to sit and I was stuck standing. I had bad swelling as well so it was hard on me, none of the girls who were sitting were past 25 weeks and it was so irritating a couple were barely even showing, a nurse walked by looked in and made one of them get up insisting I needed to sit down more then the rest of them, and for the rest of class they all gave me dirty looks, so like I said its been a sore spot for me. Because I know what its like to be real big and have to be stuck walking a distance or standing.


----------



## ahcigar1

I have read through every response the the OP question and honestly I have to say that it is disgusting how some people have treated her. Yes I realize that many of us will have different opinions on the matter, but many were outright rude and was uncalled for.

I think 'yes' she had a right to park there because she did have a pregnancy symptom. Needing to pee badly is a legit symptom and just as important as any other symptom that can arise with pregnancy. I can remember a couple of times in first tri that I had to pee so bad that it literally hurt and had me kealed over. All the pregnancy spaces were taken so I had my husband drop me off at the door so I could rush to the bathroom, and bairly making it at that point, before I went in my pants. Also suffering from IBS there is another problem that arises and pregnancy has only made this worse for me. And yes I would park in the pregnancy space even in the first trimester if I had a moment like this and not feel guilty about it at all because I knew my body and what I was going through. Other women could gripe and omplain all they wanted but unless they knew my situation then they really had no room to talk. And the same goes for everyone else on here who have been so rude to the OP. You don't know what her situation is or someone elses that you may see using the spots. I think many people inthis world have a serious case of I deserve it more than others just because of this issue, or because I'm this far along and they aren't, or because I don't think I should have to walk as far. And the ones who have that attitude need to get over themselves and start thinking that maybe that person really does need it more than you. One good saying that I love is that if you are feeling bad or having a bad day there is always someone who has it worse off than you do. But on another note it doesn't matter if you are 4 weeks, 20 weeks, 30 weeks, or 42 weeks pregnant. Every woman suffers from symptoms and every woman sufferes from different level of symptoms. Or they may have a predetermined issue that pregnancy just makes worse. The spots say clearly parking for pregnant women, not parking for pregnant women only in 3rd tri. Or parking for pregnant women who are full term. It just says parking for pregnant women.

So to OP if you had to pee that badly and couldn't hold it for a further spot down, then you have as much right to park there than any other pregnant woman has wether they me farther along than you or not as far along.


----------



## Zodiac

I have the expectant mother parkings around here too. OP is questioning if she made the right decision to park in that spot or not. She is not trying to justify her decision, in fact it seems that she felt bad and that is why she is questioning taking the space.

It was rude for someone to yell out to her. _We_ know why she parked there, but the stranger in the lot had no idea what her circumstances were. 8 weeks or 38 weeks every woman can have a different complication.

I have used the expectant mother parking on some days, and other days I purposely park further away and take the longer walk. 

I had alot of dizzy spells in early pregnancy that would cause me to almost black out, not see straight, and made me feel like I couldn't breath. On days it was 100+ degrees outside and I was concerned about the heat then I took the close spot even if I was only 12 weeks. Getting into the cool aired store _safely_, and not being nervous about getting a dizzy spell while walking in a busy parking lot is more important to me than if i'm "pregnant enough" to take the spot.


----------



## Boony

Personnally i wouldnt have used the expectant mother spot. We dont have them here and people manage perfectly fine! Also i dont see why you didnt go back and move your car once you'd been to the toilet rather than doing your shopping. 

In all 3 of my pregnancies i have never used mother and baby spaces unless i have had my kids with me i dont think its neccessary. I've been huge and still managed to park in a normal space and get in/out of my car perfectly fine even with SPD in my first two pregnancies so i dont really see the point of these spaces? 

To the poster who thinks babies should stay at home all the time i really feel for your child they are never going to learn to socialise properly if you dont take them anywhere! Taking children to shops can be very educational for them!


----------



## bumpbear

I guess its a matter of common sense: think of all the other expectant mothers who might need the spot and consider whether your need is as great as theirs would be. Would you still take the spot if you thought a 7 month pregnant lady would be showing up in 5 minutes time with a similar need to pee?

Personally, I wouldnt have taken the spot. As someone else said, I am still sprightly enough to be able to make the dash a few steps further to reach the bathroom. The next parking spot could not have been that much further away? If you have more serious medical problems that you haven't detailed here though, maybe you're an exception to the rule? Only you can judge for yourself, and if you're still comfortable with the idea of parking in stork spots dont listen to a word anyone else says!

As for the suggestion that children dont belong in malls - what on earth? That seems quite miserable to me. I am one of those people who dont understand couples who wont invite children to their weddings though. Get over your adult selves, for goodness sake! Children make the world an altogether cheerier place to be in my book.


----------



## Aidan's Mummy

She was very rude. If we had them here I don't think I would use it until I was towards the end of my pregnancy. Just because it's very hard to squeeze out of a car door with a big bump 
x


----------



## citymouse

Aidan's Mummy said:


> She was very rude. If we had them here I don't think I would use it until I was towards the end of my pregnancy. Just because it's very hard to squeeze out of a car door with a big bump
> x

The spaces you're thinking of aren't typical in the USA--they aren't bigger here, just closer.


----------



## Boony

citymouse said:


> Aidan's Mummy said:
> 
> 
> She was very rude. If we had them here I don't think I would use it until I was towards the end of my pregnancy. Just because it's very hard to squeeze out of a car door with a big bump
> x
> 
> The spaces you're thinking of aren't typical in the USA--they aren't bigger here, just closer.Click to expand...

Usa spaces are bigger than the UK spaces anyway


----------



## LeeBee

Sorry to the OP about my previous post. In addition to being fat and swollen, I'm also cranky :flower: I probably could have worded it better.


----------



## chobette

Didn't bother reading all the comments on this thread, what I did read seemed a little OT to the original post. 
We do have expecting parking spots where I live, and I am about 18 weeks today. I will say I have NOT used them, but that's only my preference. I still feel that other women would benefit from them more than me (perhaps a women a few weeks from due date, a pregnant women with other children, or someone with a newborn). That's just my experience. My MIL told me I could now park in those spots, but I still don't feel like I need it. I will go on to say I have back problems and they have gotten only worse with sciatica and I am sure when I start gaining more weight I may start using them. 
I don't think she had a right to say it's for more pregnant women than you, as they are for expecting moms, and doesn't state how far a long you should be. However, that being said, if you really didn't need to use it, perhaps another person could have? 
I frequently see people taking up these parking spaces and handicap spaces and it annoys me. I normally don't judge the pregnant one, because some women you can't tell they are pregnant. However, if you see a male walking out of his car alone and parking in this spot....well ..... hellllooo, that's a tad obvious you are only using it for your benefit. :dohh:

Hope that wasn't too harsh, I don't think it was; just an honest answer to your question. xx


----------



## Menelly

Eternal said:


> amjon said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> patch2006uk said:
> 
> 
> What about if you're breastfeeding? You can't just leave your baby with anyone. They have to be with you, cos you've got the boobs. And even when they're older, why should they be left with someone else?
> 
> Sure you can, you can pump and leave milk. I will have to leave the baby at daycare, so I'll have to pump and leave it. They can still get the milk in a bottle. Small children do NOT belong in the mall. They get in the way of other shoppers and make messes that don't belong in the store.Click to expand...
> 
> LOL! clearly your first pregnany!
> 
> If you think your bad now at 9 weeks wait until 39 weeks! Yes 1st trimester isnt the nicest, its not the nicest becuase people usually dont even know your pregnant at 9 weeks, so your suffering and no one even knows. 39 weeks is so much worse, but at least people know your pregnant.
> 
> As for just leave the baby with someone and pump, Im sorry but NO! I choose to have a baby and I dont dump my child off of anyone everytime i want to go shopping. I didnt breastfeed and still wouldnt have dumped my baby off everytime i wanted to do something.
> 
> I agree we dont have a clue about expectant mother spaces, but that doesnt mean the fact we wouldnt park there until we were further along isnt valid, you asked opioions and we gave it. I wouldnt park until I was further along. Thats IMO. You actually went on and said, well you werent all the despirate for the toilet anyway, so surley the spaces are there for a purpose, perhaps you will understand when your later a long and really struggling, try having TWINS!
> 
> As for this becoming a US/UK thing, i gogogled expectant mother spaces and found loads of interesting debates and information, many US ladies expressing the same as us and others stating the see no need in them, your pregnant not disabled! Those are other peoples opioions, but its clear its not just a culture thing, many US citizens feel the same.
> 
> I dont think the lady had a right to shout at you in the car park, (interestingly was she pregnant?) the spaces have no rules attached, so if your pregnant your pregnant, but common sense is needed i think. Im sorry if you have lots of problems, but so a lot of us, and I still wouldnt, even though my pregnancy is extremely high risk and having lost before.
> 
> No one can stop you from parking there, so feel free to do what you like, but if you ask someons opionion you will next varied ideas of what is right and wrong is this situation. Good luck with teh rest of your pregnancy :hugs:Click to expand...

I think you're confusing two different posters. I'm the OP, and I'd never ever dream of telling a breastfeeding mom to pump so she doesn't have to take a baby to the mall. This is *not* my first pregnancy, I breastfed my son for nearly a year, and he came darn near everywhere with me for that year. The "pump and leave your baby at home" isn't the OP.

The OP (me) actually does have an incredibly high risk pregnancy. I had to call 6 different OB's before I could find one to take me on. I'm really not just a whiner. And yes, I'm aware some people will disagree. My problem isn't with people who politely disagree, my issue was with people who chose to be downright rude in their disagreement, or in not understanding differences in US and UK parking yelled at me for doing something I did not do.


----------



## Menelly

citymouse said:


> The problem in my mind with quantifying how much worse 38 weeks is than 9 weeks is that someone can always come along and say, "wait til you're 42 weeks!" to the person who's 38 weeks.
> 
> Those spaces are great, but you're just as likely to find them filled by people who are 2 weeks less far than you are as by someone who's 9 weeks. When does the margin get too narrow for debate?
> 
> It actually kind of makes me cringe to see pregnant women who are farther along acting like the first trimester isn't pregnant enough. It's kind of Orwellian... "all pregnant women are equal, but some are more equal than others."
> 
> Not to say I don't think third tri can be rough. But we can none of us know exactly what it's like to be another woman, so I think it's sad to come down so hard on the op. I've known 38-39 weeks pregnant women who felt quite good--probably better than a lot of women at 9 weeks.
> 
> However, I do think that mother and child spaces should be respected for what they are, and babies and moms are more than welcome at malls! All of my early jobs were in malls and I can tell you that it's the adults you wish would stay home, 90% of the time. Just send your cute kids! ;)




Beaney192 said:


> My personal opinion in this matter would be that it depends on how you are feeling, I personally would not ever use them even now as I would always worry that I am steeling someone elses space. I just feel that this thread has got a little bit out of control as you must have wanted others opinions but im guessing you were hoping they were all one sided?
> 
> Plus to the OP who said about leaving your child behind as they are not meant for the mall! Well this is stupid I have not decided to carry a baby for 9 months to then leave him at home every time i decided to go to the shops! This is my first baby and could not think of anything worse! Im going to want to spend all my time with him!

Good gravy folks, check the names. That wasn't me! This is not my first child, I am fully supportive of breastfeeding, and I'd never dream of saying "leave your baby at home after pumping to make other's lives' easier". Would not say ever ever ever. I had a baby sling for my son and took him nearly everywhere with me for his first year. I'll do the same for this baby. Babies belong with their parents, especially that young, not some random stranger.

Seriously, stop pinning that stuff on me. I did not say it.


----------



## citymouse

? I didn't think or say it was you who said that. :huh: I was just addressing an issue that was brought up in the thread.


----------



## Menelly

Boony said:


> citymouse said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Aidan's Mummy said:
> 
> 
> She was very rude. If we had them here I don't think I would use it until I was towards the end of my pregnancy. Just because it's very hard to squeeze out of a car door with a big bump
> x
> 
> The spaces you're thinking of aren't typical in the USA--they aren't bigger here, just closer.Click to expand...
> 
> Usa spaces are bigger than the UK spaces anywayClick to expand...

LOL, they probably have to be. There are plenty of non-pregnant people in the US who need far more space to get out of their giant SUV on lifts with 40" tires while being easily twice the size of the average full term pregnant woman. ;)



> ? I didn't think or say it was you who said that.

You didn't, the posters I quoted said it was me. :(


----------



## citymouse

Menelly said:


> You didn't, the posters I quoted said it was me. :(

LOL, but I'm one of the two you quoted.


----------



## Eternal

Menelly said:


> Eternal said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> amjon said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> patch2006uk said:
> 
> 
> What about if you're breastfeeding? You can't just leave your baby with anyone. They have to be with you, cos you've got the boobs. And even when they're older, why should they be left with someone else?
> 
> Sure you can, you can pump and leave milk. I will have to leave the baby at daycare, so I'll have to pump and leave it. They can still get the milk in a bottle. Small children do NOT belong in the mall. They get in the way of other shoppers and make messes that don't belong in the store.Click to expand...
> 
> LOL! clearly your first pregnany!
> 
> If you think your bad now at 9 weeks wait until 39 weeks! Yes 1st trimester isnt the nicest, its not the nicest becuase people usually dont even know your pregnant at 9 weeks, so your suffering and no one even knows. 39 weeks is so much worse, but at least people know your pregnant.
> 
> As for just leave the baby with someone and pump, Im sorry but NO! I choose to have a baby and I dont dump my child off of anyone everytime i want to go shopping. I didnt breastfeed and still wouldnt have dumped my baby off everytime i wanted to do something.
> 
> I agree we dont have a clue about expectant mother spaces, but that doesnt mean the fact we wouldnt park there until we were further along isnt valid, you asked opioions and we gave it. I wouldnt park until I was further along. Thats IMO. You actually went on and said, well you werent all the despirate for the toilet anyway, so surley the spaces are there for a purpose, perhaps you will understand when your later a long and really struggling, try having TWINS!
> 
> As for this becoming a US/UK thing, i gogogled expectant mother spaces and found loads of interesting debates and information, many US ladies expressing the same as us and others stating the see no need in them, your pregnant not disabled! Those are other peoples opioions, but its clear its not just a culture thing, many US citizens feel the same.
> 
> I dont think the lady had a right to shout at you in the car park, (interestingly was she pregnant?) the spaces have no rules attached, so if your pregnant your pregnant, but common sense is needed i think. Im sorry if you have lots of problems, but so a lot of us, and I still wouldnt, even though my pregnancy is extremely high risk and having lost before.
> 
> No one can stop you from parking there, so feel free to do what you like, but if you ask someons opionion you will next varied ideas of what is right and wrong is this situation. Good luck with teh rest of your pregnancy :hugs:Click to expand...
> 
> I think you're confusing two different posters. I'm the OP, and I'd never ever dream of telling a breastfeeding mom to pump so she doesn't have to take a baby to the mall. This is *not* my first pregnancy, I breastfed my son for nearly a year, and he came darn near everywhere with me for that year. The "pump and leave your baby at home" isn't the OP.
> 
> The OP (me) actually does have an incredibly high risk pregnancy. I had to call 6 different OB's before I could find one to take me on. I'm really not just a whiner. And yes, I'm aware some people will disagree. My problem isn't with people who politely disagree, my issue was with people who chose to be downright rude in their disagreement, or in not understanding differences in US and UK parking yelled at me for doing something I did not do.Click to expand...

Sorry, I clearly didnt respond very well, :blush:i kind of started repling to one person then ended up responding to you. Sorry :flower:

I knew you werent the one who posted about breastfeeding and leaving your child. 

Im not saying you dont have a high risk pregnancy and I am sorry you do :hugs: It really sucks doesnt it? I have spent so much time back and forth and being in hospital, missing my son (who is only 20 months) and have just been scared out of my brains about this pregnancy, everyday I was and still am waiting for the worse to happen. I hope things ease up for you and you manage to enjoy your pregnancy, and I really hope you make it to full term (or close to) and that your baby is healthy and strong. 

I agree, which i did in my post that I dont have a clue about expectant mother spaces, if i moved there i wouldnt use them until i was further along, if i had grown up around them maybe my view would be completly different :shrug: ... I acknowledge also that you have a right to park in them, there isnt and cant be any "amount" of being pregnant, and I agree that someone could be worse in 1st trimester than in 3rd, depending on ther person. But even at my worse, when i have lost a baby or was having threantened miscarraiges and on "bed-rest" i wouldnt, for various reasons, 1. i wouldnt have told many if any people by 9 weeks so i wouldnt want to be seen and people figure i was pregnant 2. i wouldnt want people thinking i was parking there will no good reason. 3. i knew how bad things got in my pregnancy with my son late on. But thats just a personal opioion. 

I think you can only do whats right for YOU and how you feel. As i said before I think that woman was wrong to yell at you, i could maybe understand how she felt and her frustration if your coming back to your car with shopping and she was ready to pop stuggling walk in, but even if thats the case, she had no right to yell at you. Pregnancy is pregnancy, so what I or someone else would do means nothing, the spaces were designed for pregnant ladies and that covers 4 weeks to 40 weeks or more of pregnany. 

Take care and look after your baby:hugs:


----------



## Eternal

Menelly said:


> Boony said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> citymouse said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Aidan's Mummy said:
> 
> 
> She was very rude. If we had them here I don't think I would use it until I was towards the end of my pregnancy. Just because it's very hard to squeeze out of a car door with a big bump
> x
> 
> The spaces you're thinking of aren't typical in the USA--they aren't bigger here, just closer.Click to expand...
> 
> Usa spaces are bigger than the UK spaces anywayClick to expand...
> 
> LOL, they probably have to be. There are plenty of non-pregnant people in the US who need far more space to get out of their giant SUV on lifts with 40" tires while being easily twice the size of the average full term pregnant woman. ;)
> 
> 
> 
> ? I didn't think or say it was you who said that.Click to expand...
> 
> You didn't, the posters I quoted said it was me. :(Click to expand...

yeah US cars and much bigger than the average UK car, seriously there are some cars here you just cant park. The amount of multi-story car parks ive been in and seen people in huge 4x4/SUV type things that cant fit anywhere lol!

I wish all our spaces were nice a wide here, i hate mother and toddler because no one respects them here and its really difficult getting a baby or toddler out of a normal size space, if im on my own and cant get a mother and toddler, i park right at the back of the store, i dont mind walking, even if its on the road, as long as i can open my doors. You know what though? The back of the car park can be completely empty and some idoit always decided to park next to me and always the side the car seat is! ARH! Ok rant over.

Yes I agree, US spaces are bigger but you have much bigger cars.


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## blessedmomma

:hugs:menelly- i really just hope you have some peace about this. its not worth worrying/stressing out over. you take care hun and do whatever is best for you and baby right now. praying for ya both love!:hugs:


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## Menelly

It's OK all. I think all of us with pregnancy hormones rushing around are probably taking things more personally than we need to, especially me. Normally, I agree with you guys and would save the spot for someone who I felt needed it more. I felt I needed it that day, so I took it. The lady who yelled at me didn't appear any more pregnant than I do (but that's not saying much, cause she could be as well!) I was actually carrying a bag from the maternity store when I left. (Motherhood's sleeping bras are really comfy, btw!) 

This seems to have turned into a combination of hormones and cultural confusion that we can all probably let go now. :) 

Thanks for the apology Eternal! And I hope your pregnancy turns out OK too. It's really scary... my son I had no problems with at all. This one, they've told me to make sure my will is in order. :( Oh well... s/he is worth it!


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## mamawannabee

We only have them at babies r us here, and I have wondered this the whole pregnancy. The first time I used it was at 19 weeks, before that I felt like I didn't deserve to park there because people couldn't tell I was pg and I guess I was afraid of someone being rude about it. But now that I'm obviously pg I park in them.


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## blessedmomma

mamawannabee said:


> We only have them at babies r us here, and I have wondered this the whole pregnancy. The first time I used it was at 19 weeks, before that I felt like I didn't deserve to park there because people couldn't tell I was pg and I guess I was afraid of someone being rude about it. But now that I'm obviously pg I park in them.

we are in kansas and only have them at babies r us too! the parking lot is never that full, would be better at a mall here or somewhere where they would be more useful. if you dont mind me asking, what state are you in?


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## Nicoleoleole

blessedmomma said:


> mamawannabee said:
> 
> 
> We only have them at babies r us here, and I have wondered this the whole pregnancy. The first time I used it was at 19 weeks, before that I felt like I didn't deserve to park there because people couldn't tell I was pg and I guess I was afraid of someone being rude about it. But now that I'm obviously pg I park in them.
> 
> we are in kansas and only have them at babies r us too! the parking lot is never that full, would be better at a mall here or somewhere where they would be more useful. if you dont mind me asking, what state are you in?Click to expand...

I used to see them everywhere in VA, but now that we live in GA, I see them on base at the PX and Commissary!


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## mamawannabee

blessedmomma said:


> mamawannabee said:
> 
> 
> We only have them at babies r us here, and I have wondered this the whole pregnancy. The first time I used it was at 19 weeks, before that I felt like I didn't deserve to park there because people couldn't tell I was pg and I guess I was afraid of someone being rude about it. But now that I'm obviously pg I park in them.
> 
> we are in kansas and only have them at babies r us too! the parking lot is never that full, would be better at a mall here or somewhere where they would be more useful. if you dont mind me asking, what state are you in?Click to expand...

We're in MA, I don't see them anywhere and like you said, the parking lot is never full so they really aren't even necessary. I've seen them at CVS and grocery stores in other states, but not here!


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## Trying4ababy

Here you have to be showing to park in the expectant mother spots. 
Otherwise all women would park there and say I'm pregnant, I'm just not showing. IYKWIM


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## ovetta2001

In TX they have some. I'm not hugely showing (18 weeks) but i've been having bad cramps and struggling with th heat. Its blooming 111F here!. We used one the other day and I got a start of a lecture from some woman. I told her to F off....i do love my hormones. My OH laughed :)


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## hope2havebaby

The thing is, some folks really need to mind their business. In some pregnancies, mother's may not show.. she had no clue how much weeks/months you were!! Tell her keep moving and to cut things short give them a wrong figure. What could they do? Just don't let anyone stress you out this early in your pregnancy... that is something you don't need. You didn't break any laws! It was designed for you dear. In severe cases like this, it understandable especially so don't feel bad.


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## NashiPear

Gosh, such a hard call and it is so individual. With my first pregnancy I had very bad morning sickness, all day nausea, vomiting, headaches and exhaustion, plus often and urgency to pee. I was much more comfortable in my third tri despite being very big and having a LOT of swelling, so I guess visually you can judge, but unless you walked in another's shoes, you just don't know. I would not be bothered about parking in them at all when I am pregnant except on a bad day or in your situation. 

This time I am pregnant and even bigger than the first (I am HUGE at 33 weeks and every day someone makes comment that I won't last or that I have days left). I am quite happy to walk at the moment, but at 22 weeks my waters broke. I was still showing quite a bit for that gestation, but at the hospital I really wanted to use the disabled park (no stork park here) so that I walked less and lost less amniotic fluid. I was high risk and told I would probably lose the baby. Luckily, we have defied odds, but at the time, I so wished I had the guts to park there without a permit. 
I was at the hospital the other day and someone didn't park in their space properly and took some of mine- now there's a rant!! Trying to put my toddler in the car with my massive belly and barely being able to fit made me so furious. I nearly left a rather unimpressed message!

Honestly, I have had times when I wouldn't look it and others would assume I didn't need a spot, when really I needed it more than most. Now, massive, with a toddler, I could cope much better than at other times.... so looks can be deceiving. I think it is a big lesson in trying not to be too judgmental as we may not know the full circumstance.


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## Eternal

Menelly said:


> Thanks for the apology Eternal! And I hope your pregnancy turns out OK too. It's really scary... my son I had no problems with at all. This one, they've told me to make sure my will is in order. :( Oh well... s/he is worth it!

He or she will be! :thumbup:

But remember your baby cant survive without you, so however harsh that seems you come first. I was told a simular thing early on and had to decide if to have surgery or not. But it came down to if i didnt, then i would either be dead or in intensive care, if that happened then my babies wouldnt have survived. I had the surgery dispite the big risk to my pregnancy and babies, it was a hard call to make, but for me it was the right one, we dont know what effect the drugs i took will have on the babies and Ive had huge problems with pre-labour symptoms. But they seem to be doing really well, and it felt this way they had a chance, if i didnt do it they wouldnt have. 

I hope you dont have to ever make those sort of decisions. Look after yourself.:hugs:


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## Connah'sMommy

I think there have been some really rude and harsh responses to the OP...Some of you should think before you speak...no need for rudeness!
You can disagree without the attitude im sure...

Personally i wouldnt have parked there,i think i could have managed to hold it (i hope):lol: 
They should definately be reserved for those with problems such as SPD etc...i know that having SPD as severe as i have i would kill for a parking space that was nearer the shop! We dont have them unfortunately.

You made a decision base on your situation and no one should blame you for that hun so dont feel bad :)xx


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## Jims_Girl

Wow! What a bunch of hormonal, rude, prima-donnas we have here!
I think some people need to get a grip!

No matter what your opinion is there is no need for being impolite!

This forum sometimes feels like it's made acceptable to be rude because of pregnancy hormones... 

For what it's worth... Pregnant is pregnant - I think the battle of the trimesters should really stop.... The number of weeks pregnant does not make a lady any less pregnant then someone who is further along in their pregnancy....


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## Jims_Girl

Double post


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## blessedmomma

eternal- i hope everything ends up ok with your babies. im sure the Lord has a purpose behind all of it for you, maybe even just that you do what your doing by being able to comfort others with a rough pregnancy as well. keep the faith hun. said a prayer for you and the babies:hugs:

someone stated that where they are only women showing can use the spaces. does it actually say that on the sign? just asking cuz ours dont say anything like that. i would hope for the most part women would be honest and only use them if they were pregnant. i think the people around here are mostly good people and wouldnt lie just for a parking spot:dohh: seems silly to me, but im sure there are selfish hearts out there.

i would never say anything to anyone though. if someone is deceitful, they will answer for it one day, i have no doubt about that.... wont be answering to me though, my job is to love not judge.


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## fides

To the OP, in my opinion, pregnant is pregnant. 



LeeBee said:


> In fact, I had something similiar happen the other day. Some man parked is car in the only stork parking spot at the grocery store and I had to park in the very back of the parking lot. As I waddled by him I said, "I'd just like to think you for choosing that parking spot. Because I really enjoyed walking from way back there. Thanks."

Good for you for saying something to that jerk! 

We have 4 expectant mother spots at one of the Walmarts around here, and my SI joint is thrown off any time i go grocery shopping, so, yes, i've been using the expectant mother spots since i started getting that pain (it really helps that there's a cart stall next to the 4 spots). When all 4 spots are taken, i'm thinking, oh, well - better luck next time. BUT, when I see a man getting in/out of his car in one of those spots, or I see that some person is actually just using the spot as a waiting zone with their car running while their passenger is in the store, that's what really ticks me off.


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## blessedmomma

fides- i hope it doesnt get too much worse on you! wal-mart, now thats a place that would be a good store for stork parking!!!!:thumbup:

hopefully maybe those people sitting there waiting or the men running in are with a pregnant woman still. of course, maybe they aren't.


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## 9babiesgone

I hated the parking on the military base, bc you had to be a certain amount of weeks pregnant to get an stork parking pass, and all the other slots were so much further away from the doors and the buildings. I dont think they even allow you to use them in your 2nd tri. which sucks. but in civilian spots, out off base, they dont have a required pass you have to have. so you can be any weeks you, want. so i think based on the law of the land, if it is like the ones here in cali, she had an legal right to park there. whether it was ethical or not. I dont really care, bc honestly she did an legal thing.


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## newmommy23

I kinda can't make up my mind on this issue, since there are valid point from both sides. I don't think she should have yelled at you, but I personally would not (and never ended up) using one, because I personally never had very bad pain. I did, however, puke in a parking lot once, and also peed in a men's urinal once during my pregnancy, so I do understand urgency. lmfao


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## ahcigar1

What really erks me is I see someone go to their car that is parked in the stork parking getting ready to leave. They spot me stoped and waiting for them to back out and they sit there forever refusing to back out. Then I finally give up and circle around more trying to find something somewhat close and as soon as I turn the corner they back out, and by the time I get back around to that spot it is already taken. ARGH that really irritates me. Also I can't tell you how many times that I see the single guy getinto his car that is parked in these spaces. I am beginning to think really do need to have some kind of pass like handicap card that can get from your doctor at first appointment or something to help cut down on the men abusing them. Cause that really does make me mad. Also think that do need to have some more of them around. Like at the mall you only have 2 of these spots for the WHOLE mall. while at babies where you don't even need them really cause they are never parked up you have like 10 of these spots. While many places don't even have them at all. Like Target really needs them. I usually just have to have my husband drop me off at the door and have him go park the car cause thier lots are horrible and almost always end up all the way in the back. And usually the farther/longer time that I walk the stronger my BH pick up and then really am uncomfortable.


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## blessedmomma

im the same ahcigar. bh act up the further i walk, and strangely enough they are worse when i really need to pee lol! i agree on needing them for more stores. i used to have my DH drop me off, but now that means he has to get 5 kiddos out of the car and safely up to the door by himself. he is a great hubby, but that takes magic :haha:

i think your idea of getting a pass to use them aint half bad:thumbup:


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## jeanniepresto

next time id just say ... jealous r ya :) u r pregnant n thats why it ther.... it doest say only if u r 7 month or more lol


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## Chaos

Menelly said:


> I was going to the mall today, need a bigger bra (ack) and I had that rather sudden need to pee we all get first trimester. Well, lo and behold, there was stork parking right next to the door for the food court, which is where the restroom is in our mall. Yay! So I pull into the stork parking, go in to pee, and then get my shopping done.
> 
> On my way out, I go to my car and a lady stops me and tells me how wrong I am for parking in expectant mother parking. I say "but, I am expecting. I'm almost 9 weeks." To which she replies it's for "women more pregnant than I am".
> 
> So... when are you pregnant enough for stork parking? How do you handle rude women like this? I didn't think I was in the wrong... I parked there so I could run in and pee quickly. But now I'm curious... is it only for women who are showing? Only third trimester? I'm not sure... what do you think?

Dunno really .... I personally still don't park in them, if I'm feeling fine enough to walk from a normal spot ... I will (could always do with the walking!) ... I would prefer someone who is feeling really crap and sore that day to get the space. The only time I've ever used one this pregnancy was last week when I went to the OB and was having an anxiety attack and needed to get in there quick.


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## Jules

We dont really have any expectant mum parking spaces round where i am i dont think, we do have child parking spaces, which i can hardly ever get parked in due to oldies and white vans! so frustrating, trying to get my 3 year old out of the back of a two door car heavily pregnant in a normal space! some people are so rude


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## AP

Chaos said:


> Dunno really .... I personally still don't park in them, if I'm feeling fine enough to walk from a normal spot ... I will (could always do with the walking!) ... I would prefer someone who is feeling really crap and sore that day to get the space. The only time I've ever used one this pregnancy was last week when I went to the OB and was having an anxiety attack and needed to get in there quick.

A perfect example of common sense imo.


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## DLA

We have a lot of the "expectant mothers" parking but I've also seen ones that are labeled "3rd trimester parking", so if you want to be technical, you have every right to park there. That being said I would be prepared for the rude reactions (which you obviously encountered). 

I actually don't think there should be any pregnant parking. Now that's a little drastic but I'll explain why I have this opinion. Last year I had my 4th knee surgery and was on crutches for a few months. The doctor issued my a handicap parking pass. There were several times when I would go to the store and all the handicap spots were taken and there were all these damn pregnancy spots. I was more than annoyed that I had to hobble on crutches, in pain with 27 staples up my leg in the ice and snow no less from the back of the lot, and then there were closer spots for pregnancy. IMO if you need to walk less for whatever the reason, then a doctor should issue you a handicap pass.

Now, that's just my personal opinion, I don't use the expectant mother spots and I have vowed not to during my whole pregnancy (I'll let you know how that goes in a few more weeks, as it's already getting quite hard to walk and this sciatica is a nightmare! lol). I would never yell at anyone for using the spots though, they are there and if doesn't specify a trimester, it's fair game. Also I think people could have been more polite with disagreeing with the OP.


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## Akinesia

DLA said:


> IMO if you need to walk less for whatever the reason, then a doctor should issue you a handicap pass.

I see what you're saying, and I've been there too... I shattered my ankle and was on crutches for months, but never bothered to get a handicap pass. I could have, but it wasn't the end of the world for me to crutch from further away. At the same time, I appreciate stores deciding to give courtesies like expectant mother parking or mother/child parking. I guess the way I see it is just because there are other reasons that could make it difficult for someone to get across a parking lot, does not make stores in the wrong for providing closer spaces for some of the more common difficulties such as pregnancy and having small children. You can't pander to every single person, but I do think it's nice they are at least trying to cover pregnant women and children.


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## teal

Jules said:


> We dont really have any expectant mum parking spaces round where i am i dont think, we do have child parking spaces, which i can hardly ever get parked in due to oldies and white vans! so frustrating, trying to get my 3 year old out of the back of a two door car heavily pregnant in a normal space! some people are so rude

I've noticed white vans (with no children!) using them a lot too! :growlmad:


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## babyhopes2010

we dont have expentant mothers parkiing lol

people really shouldnt judge if someone is struggling with there pregnancy at 9 weeks.if you are fine i dont think u should park there.
im now 30 wks and i had to walk along way to the supermarket from the car park my feet were swollen i had a bad headache and had branston hicks by the time i got back i had to sit own for 1/2 hour just to get some strength up. x


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## lynnikins

we dont have "pregnancy" parking here and its very rare that all the disabled spots will be in use at the supermarkets I use normally your lucky to see 1-2 cars in the disabled bays and there are like 25 of them but we do have parent and child parking which is for parents with children upto 3 yrs that they issue you a pass ( at tesco with your clubcard ) if your children are all over 3/4 years then the need for opening your doors so wide is lessened in most cases as the carseats are different and easier to get them in and out of. 
if i dont use a parent child space then it is hard since i have 2 kids in carseats i have to open the doors quite wide to use so if i dont park there i end up parking in the furtherest corner of the lot to avoid having cars parked either side of me, i try to avoid taking the kids to the shops though and when they arent with me i dont use the spaces


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## MiissMuffet

We don't need a pass to park in a parent carpark, as long as we have the child lol, or a carseat in the car but i dont understand what would happen if you took the carseat in (e.g. a newborn capsule). I dont know if I've seen expectant mother parking, but if i was in the state i got to when i was heavily pregnant last time and i saw an able bodied lady park in the space just "because" she is pregnant, but didnt need it- i think i would be really mad


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## Menelly

MiissMuffet said:


> We don't need a pass to park in a parent carpark, as long as we have the child lol, or a carseat in the car but i dont understand what would happen if you took the carseat in (e.g. a newborn capsule). I dont know if I've seen expectant mother parking, but if i was in the state i got to when i was heavily pregnant last time and i saw an able bodied lady park in the space just "because" she is pregnant, but didnt need it- i think i would be really mad

But how would you know if she's actually able bodied and not struggling? That was my real issue with the lady yelling at me. She doesn't know me. She doesn't know my medical history. She has no clue how far along I am. (I'm pretty chunky... I could be hiding a pregnancy in chunkiness.) She has no clue what I've been going thru. Now, does anyone have the right to be annoyed? Sure! Think dark glowering thoughts! But I'm going to hold to my belief that it was wrong for the lady to have even said anything. Frankly, you never know.


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## rosie5637

i agree. you can't tell if someone is struggling just by looking at them. i have severely struggled in early pregnancy but if this is like my last one than it'll be a breeze further down the line.

it's the same with disabled spaces. you can't always tell just by looking at someone wether they 'deserve' the space. a friend of mine has terrible trouble with her spine, she's has more nuts, bolts and plates than a DIY store! she is registered disabled but to look at her she is normal.that will change one day when she is confined to a wheelchair but at the moment she has to put up with filthy looks if she uses a disabled parking space, and she has a blue badge!


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## blessedmomma

Menelly said:


> MiissMuffet said:
> 
> 
> We don't need a pass to park in a parent carpark, as long as we have the child lol, or a carseat in the car but i dont understand what would happen if you took the carseat in (e.g. a newborn capsule). I dont know if I've seen expectant mother parking, but if i was in the state i got to when i was heavily pregnant last time and i saw an able bodied lady park in the space just "because" she is pregnant, but didnt need it- i think i would be really mad
> 
> But how would you know if she's actually able bodied and not struggling? That was my real issue with the lady yelling at me. She doesn't know me. She doesn't know my medical history. She has no clue how far along I am. (I'm pretty chunky... I could be hiding a pregnancy in chunkiness.) She has no clue what I've been going thru. Now, does anyone have the right to be annoyed? Sure! Think dark glowering thoughts! But I'm going to hold to my belief that it was wrong for the lady to have even said anything. Frankly, you never know.Click to expand...

i was thinking this same thing! :thumbup:


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## aliss

I'm of the belief that "pregnant parking" is for those who feel they could use it because of the pregnancy :) Morning sickness, SPD, huge-as-a-hippo, whatever. Me, I had a problem-free pregnancy and happily did NOT park there even at 40 weeks along. And I don't use parent parking either. If another woman in 1st tri or with a baby feels entitled to those spots, then that's their right and I don't question it.

I'm very sensitive to the subject, my mother is disabled and sometimes needs to use disabled parking. Yes, her disability is obvious (wheelchair) but that is not always the case for other people (cardiac patients, MS), so we have no right to judge. If you feel like someone is misusing it, report them to the proper authorities. Tired of vigilantes who might just be wrong anyways.


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## MiissMuffet

Well i guess i wouldn't know to be honest i would just have to trust that whoever was parking there had a valid reason to park there. i always miss out on these parks anyway and never see who gets in and out of them so i never think about it, just drive to the next space lol


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## mrsthomas623

I really only used them twice as I needed the excersize! Once was when I had pulled a side muscle from lifting too much and the other was around 37 weeks when my feet were so swollen it hurt to walk.


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## mamalove

not read the whole thread BUT i felt a A LOT worse in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy then at any other point and i have been pregnant 4 times.


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## candy808

TiredNurse27 said:


> In my opinion something like this would be designed for people who are heavily pregnant and have trouble walking long distances.
> 
> All you've told us is that you needed to go for a wee and felt like using the spaces.
> 
> I doubt that's the intended purpose of the parking spaces, I'd hate to be 9 months pregnant seeing you with your shopping while I'm struggling.



There are no restrictions. Expectant means expectant.:shrug:


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## Jaylynne

Just read all the posts... Glad a lot of women see some of the rudeness that was posted and commented against it. Anyway... Many of the shops near me have pregnant parking and I don't plan on using them unless absolutely necessary as I need to walk more for exercise. I'm also not saying that someone in their first trimester can't use them as they are pregnant as much as 3rd tri just not as visible. I have had major back pain since becoming pregnant and sometimes walking is very painful after 30+ minutes so I can only imagine how amplified that back pain is when you add another 20 lbs to it later in pregnancy so I leave that spot for someone who needs it more. If you need it, take it and if not don't. But never apologize for parking where you thought you had to as you had every legal right to.


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## Froggi

I go past these spaces at walmart all the time wondering if I am pregnant enough.

I have been having a lot of difficulties with my pregnancy so far and think I should be able to use the space at only 14 weeks but I still question it and feel bad.

I believe I should be allowed to use them but at the same time I am leary as said before.

I ALSO wonder if you would have to have proof.


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## syntaxerror

Haven't read the whole thread and we don't have those spots anywhere local, so far as I know.

But I do know that first tri (and first part of second tri), I was miserable, FOB wasn't helping at all (or even speaking to me), we had a threatened miscarriage at 8 weeks and I was *supposed* to be on bed rest (oops), I'd feel too weak to actually get to the car and drive to the grocery store (didnt really have a choice though) and I blacked out in the grocery store several times (yay for low blood pressure.) I still get to feeling like I'm about to hit the floor now...but less nauseous...if you were uncomfortable at 9 weeks, tell her to go to hell. None of her business.

I'll deliberately park a little further away now as I'm trying to get some extra walking in now that I don't feel totally unable to function anymore; I think trying to say one trimester is necessarily any worse than another is totally subjective. I haven't gotten to the end of third yet -- but unless something changes drastically, there's no way it's going to be worse than first was.


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## Torontogal

Not to sound like Dr. Sheldon Cooper here, but pregancy is a binary condition. Either you are an expectant mother, or you are not. If you are, you are entitled to use that space under the technical requirements of the parking facility. Since there is no reliable way to ascertain this unless one is carrying around portable ultrasound equipment, vigilantes should be advised against calling out others as they lack the date to ascertain whether one is a valid user of the space or not. That is all. Bazinga!


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## Froggi

syntaxerror said:


> Haven't read the whole thread and we don't have those spots anywhere local, so far as I know.
> 
> But I do know that first tri (and first part of second tri), I was miserable, FOB wasn't helping at all (or even speaking to me), we had a threatened miscarriage at 8 weeks and I was *supposed* to be on bed rest (oops), I'd feel too weak to actually get to the car and drive to the grocery store (didnt really have a choice though) and I blacked out in the grocery store several times (yay for low blood pressure.) I still get to feeling like I'm about to hit the floor now...but less nauseous...if you were uncomfortable at 9 weeks, tell her to go to hell. None of her business.
> 
> I'll deliberately park a little further away now as I'm trying to get some extra walking in now that I don't feel totally unable to function anymore; I think trying to say one trimester is necessarily any worse than another is totally subjective. I haven't gotten to the end of third yet -- but unless something changes drastically, there's no way it's going to be worse than first was.

Yeah, I'm on bedrest right now kinda/sorta as much as I can be due to a threatened miscarriage. And I've had many hospital trips and extra ultrasounds and such due to other problems with the pregnancy. I'd think I'd be allowed to use the spots...but who knows. If I got yelled at or someone said something rude to me...haha...I'd just give them some of my lovely hormonal fits in their face.


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## kiki04

Never judge a book by its cover... some of you people are just being awful with insults. 

I personally have back problems in my lower back, and the last 2 times I have been pg this one spot in my lower back gives out randomly. Therefore not walking too far. And yes this begins in the beginning when hormones are relaxing your body and making room by expanding your hips etc etc therefore it happens before Im showing. For that I use those spots... THEY ARE THERE FOR PG WOMEN! Jeez :dohh: 

What defines a pg woman to you guys? 2 pink lines? a big belly? exhaustion? Back pain? Complications? and so on and so on and so on... so who are you to call which symptoms warrant use of it and which ones dont :dohh:


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## xBabyGoose

I think some people are forgetting that during first trimester the 'need to pee' IS a burden, as uterus is wayyy down and squishing bladder... its a bit worse now, but i still remember the early loo trips!

I wouldnt personally have parked there, im a bit of a push over, but 8 weeks or 38 weeks - if you need to go, you need to go - you are pregnant after all. I wouldnt feel guilty if i were u hon, and the woman had no right to be rude!


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## twilliamssbt

I truly believe that you can never judge a book by its cover, people may disagree about someone at 8 weeks using the space for the toilet. however, the woman challenging her had no right to do so, this gets my back up in regard to disabled spaces too.

My mum had half a lung removed from lung cancer, looked outwardly ok, however she was on chemo and had terminal lung cancer which only got worse till I lost her last year. The looks she got were downright evil.

I also have a blue badge, I walk with crutches, have to use a wheelchair for long distance, and am now 8 weeks pregnant too.

To those people that complained about a pregnant woman using a mother and baby if no expectant mother was available, would you also have a rant at a disabled person displaying a badge that was parked in mother and baby because there are never enough disabled spaces and always too bloody many mother and child wherever I go shopping.

The other thing that narks me, is that Sainsburys insist on putting mother and child spaces closer to the doors than disabled spaces, sorry, but to get a disabled badge, you have to be struggling to walk more than 50 yards, so why put some of the disabled spaces more than 50 yards away from the bloody door when all the mother and baby are right next to the entrance. By the time I get to the doors, I don't have the energy to get all round the shop I am usually in so much pain.


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