# June 2015 Rainbows!!



## Radiance

Hey everyone! I hope to see a lot of June rainbows here!! I will be posting my story(ies) below. Welcome!! :) 

Due Dates:

June 2015

2nd
Shilo

5th
Radiance

7th
kerri28

9th
Babyjan

10th
DisneyMom2011

15th
eblondie

19th
smoore

20th
pink_phoenix​


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## Radiance

This is my 8th baby!! We have two living and five angels; 3 boys, 2 girls and 2 unknown (and our current one which I really feel will be a girl). 

Earlier last week I had that pregnancy feeling. But I had a one day that was horrible. I woke up feeling energetic and an hour later it hit me at once. Nausea, gagging, hot, sweaty, cold, chilly, dizzy and one point I blacked out. I decided to test or go to the doctors if negative. I was early still, my period wasn't suppose to arrive until the 29th so I was sure if I would even see anything if I was pregnant. September 25th, I got my first :bfp:! Two days later I tested again and lines were darker! :happydance: On Sunday, the day before my appointment I gave in and bought a clearblue estimator test, 2-3 meaning 4-5 weeks! Woohoo!! 

I had my first appointment yesterday, it was three hours long!! It went great. We just moved to another state about three months ago so we are still quite new. I talked to one lady about history, family history, vitals, blood work... all that good stuff! ;) I then saw the OB and she was great! She listened, tried to understand, gave her opinion and went farther by calling a few specialists and getting me in sooner and getting their opinions on what to do. I have a detailed scan on Saturday morning for cervix length and baby :) I see my OB again on October 21st, which is a day after my water broke with Hope and a day before I had her so I'm a little anxious. My due date with this one is quite close to hers as well. We were going to start progesterone pills right away but she called and put a pause on it as the specialist wants me to get Lupus test done and then take it from there. 

I'm eating more, trying to eat really healthy, taking my prenatals... so far everything is good! :thumbup:


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## babyjan

Hey radiance! I don't know if you remember me but I followed your pregnancy journey with Elijah! I'm so happy your pregnant again you been through so much :hugs:

Well I would like to join here, I've seen the June thread but I'm so nervous to join or acknowledge with others in fear something goes wrong :(

I've been trying for some time after depo and got a surprise bfp back in April but I was already bleeding at the point I took a test, I only tested because I was bleeding for 11 days! Blood test confirmed miscarriage :( 

Anyways I've been getting bfps since last Wednesday (8dpo) and I think AF was due today so far nothing but it doesn't stop me constantly going to the bathroom to check! 

If all goes well I should be due June 9th, I'm so scared I haven't even called the drs yet! I have no symtoms whatsoever which is worrying me as I felt very pregnant at this point with my son but I know every pregnancy is different but the fear of loss just doesn't go away.

Anyways I hope we can stick together together till June x


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## Radiance

babyjan said:


> Hey radiance! I don't know if you remember me but I followed your pregnancy journey with Elijah! I'm so happy your pregnant again you been through so much :hugs:
> 
> Well I would like to join here, I've seen the June thread but I'm so nervous to join or acknowledge with others in fear something goes wrong :(
> 
> I've been trying for some time after depo and got a surprise bfp back in April but I was already bleeding at the point I took a test, I only tested because I was bleeding for 11 days! Blood test confirmed miscarriage :(
> 
> Anyways I've been getting bfps since last Wednesday (8dpo) and I think AF was due today so far nothing but it doesn't stop me constantly going to the bathroom to check!
> 
> If all goes well I should be due June 9th, I'm so scared I haven't even called the drs yet! I have no symtoms whatsoever which is worrying me as I felt very pregnant at this point with my son but I know every pregnancy is different but the fear of loss just doesn't go away.
> 
> Anyways I hope we can stick together together till June x

Believe me! I know those fear! My period would have been yesterday. Due to my history of pprom and losing Hope from pproming in first trimester, I am terrified every time I feel extra discharge! Leaves me running to the bathroom to see if it's blood or amniotic. 

I have new doctors and so far they are doing amazing!! I have my first scan on Saturday and I am scared we won't see anything!

October itself is hard. Stephen's due date is the 10th (we lost him at 16 weeks) and then Hope's one year is October 22nd. I am praying this baby sticks. 

Keep in mind that each pregnancy is different :hugs: I had no and I mean nothing with my two living children, I had Hyperemesis gravidarum (HG) with Elijah and Stephen, not much of anything with Hope and my two early miscarriages. This one I have nausea, cravings, hunger, tiredness, crankiness ;) and tons of breast pains! The symptoms are different each day.

It's hard to enjoy pregnancy when you've had a loss. Of course you are going to have bad and good days, you're going to be scared and worried but don't forget to have some happiness and hope <3


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## Radiance

Today I am extremely tired!! Today is going so slow!! Must be the excitement (a little scared) for my scan tomorrow morning!! :happydance:


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## Elsa50501

Radiance! Congrats :). I wish all the best for you this pregnancy :). I hope you and your family are doing well :)


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## Radiance

Elsa50501 said:


> Radiance! Congrats :). I wish all the best for you this pregnancy :). I hope you and your family are doing well :)

Thank you! We're doing pretty good but coming up on hard dates. Stephen's due date is the 10th and the 22nd is Hope's angelversary. So far all looks well with this one :thumbup:


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## Radiance

*Update on my scan!!!*

From what we saw, all looks well. My lining was really thick, my cervix looks long but he couldn't accurately measure it because I'm still so early and we saw a small sac :thumbsup: He said from the beginning we wouldn't see baby yet so trying not to worry that much. There was a lot of fluid around my left ovary, he said, that it was ok and that when my egg released it popped the cyst. So I go back for another scan in two weeks to see baby and heartbeat :happydance: That scan will definitely eat at me!! I was very anxious and full and panic last night. This morning was good until I waited slightly over an hour and then waiting in the room with the ultrasound ready to go for what seemed a lifetime. :wacko: I am very confident in my new OB (that oddly doesn't deliver babies), my second OB (delivers, does my scans and has worked 18 years with highrisk) and the perinatologist I have yet to meet!

They seem pretty confident about my newest miracle and I'm hoping everyone is right on them!! Today he mentioned possible stitch and of course we will still do the injections if I get to 16 weeks... A lot of hoping!!


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## Shilo

We are in June Bugs together but I'll join here too! I saw your request for graphics and I can try to get some done later today :) I'm due June 2nd.

My background - I have been TTC since September 2010. I quickly realized I wasn't ovulating and rarely was I getting periods. In January 2014 I was diagnosed with PCOS which I already pretty much knew. I started Metformin and currently take 1500mg daily. In late March, I did my first round of Femara and to my surprise, I got my BFP on May 2nd at 9DPO. That whole pregnancy was never normal. I had fluctuating HCG from the start. I was having blood work every 2 days and ultrasounds every week for 4 weeks. It was a suspected ectopic for a while because the pregnancy couldn't be found. Finally, it was found in my uterus and there were two. I was always measuring 2 weeks behind. Around 7 weeks, one vanished (vanishing twin syndrome) and I have a pretty traumatic miscarriage of the other at 8w3d on June 6th.

I had to take a break for a while because my right tube became blocked from fluid due to my miscarriage. I was scheduled for an HSG to clear it out. Last minute they decided to do an ultrasound before taking me in for my HSG and it had cleared itself out! With that, we started trying again. I did my first round of Femara since my miscarriage in late August. I ovulated the earliest I ever have and got my BFP on September 19th. 

The timing of this pregnant feels so significant to me. I got pregnant the day before the 4 year anniversary of our TTC journey. I will be 20 weeks on the dot on my original due date in January. I am also due 4 days before the 1 year anniversary of my miscarriage. If everything goes well, I'm wondering if this baby might decide to make its appearance on that day. 

I've had some spotting this week so I'm feeling very scared and worried. I'm on progesterone suppositories though so it may just be cervix irritation. I'm trying to stop being so pessimistic. I have an ultrasound on Friday when I will be 6w3d.


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## Radiance

Shilo said:


> We are in June Bugs together but I'll join here too! I saw your request for graphics and I can try to get some done later today :) I'm due June 2nd.
> 
> My background - I have been TTC since September 2010. I quickly realized I wasn't ovulating and rarely was I getting periods. In January 2014 I was diagnosed with PCOS which I already pretty much knew. I started Metformin and currently take 1500mg daily. In late March, I did my first round of Femara and to my surprise, I got my BFP on May 2nd at 9DPO. That whole pregnancy was never normal. I had fluctuating HCG from the start. I was having blood work every 2 days and ultrasounds every week for 4 weeks. It was a suspected ectopic for a while because the pregnancy couldn't be found. Finally, it was found in my uterus and there were two. I was always measuring 2 weeks behind. Around 7 weeks, one vanished (vanishing twin syndrome) and I have a pretty traumatic miscarriage of the other at 8w3d on June 6th.
> 
> I had to take a break for a while because my right tube became blocked from fluid due to my miscarriage. I was scheduled for an HSG to clear it out. Last minute they decided to do an ultrasound before taking me in for my HSG and it had cleared itself out! With that, we started trying again. I did my first round of Femara since my miscarriage in late August. I ovulated the earliest I ever have and got my BFP on September 19th.
> 
> The timing of this pregnant feels so significant to me. I got pregnant the day before the 4 year anniversary of our TTC journey. I will be 20 weeks on the dot on my original due date in January. I am also due 4 days before the 1 year anniversary of my miscarriage. If everything goes well, I'm wondering if this baby might decide to make its appearance on that day.
> 
> I've had some spotting this week so I'm feeling very scared and worried. I'm on progesterone suppositories though so it may just be cervix irritation. I'm trying to stop being so pessimistic. I have an ultrasound on Friday when I will be 6w3d.

I would love that! Thank you!! I decided to create a after loss one because I have my bad days or triggers like scan that some of the other ladies on there wouldn't quite understand if they haven't gone through a loss and I also didn't want to bring down the group or scare ftms!! :) I want to keep this thread/group opened with feelings... the good and the bad!! :winkwink: 

I've been thinking of you all week! I always hate the wait for scans. :wacko: I'm due just around the time I was Due with Hope. We lost her October 22nd, my water I broke October 20th. At this moment I feel quite good and positive but I'm going to be a mess my next appointment and scan. My appoint is the 21st so right in the middle of when my water broke and before I delivered/miscarried. And then my scan is the 23rd so day after. Blah!! 

This month is just overall hard, my son Stephen's due date is in two days. It's just an emotional month.


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## Radiance

Today is Stephen's due date. I miss him so much. I got an email that they shipped his Molly Bear this morning. I just can't stop thinking about how right now I should have three boys and a girl. I'm really hoping this baby sticks. [-o&lt;

My last scan of him alive, on my birthday <3 :kiss:
 



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## eblondie

Hi. Please can I join? My due date is June 15th. Trying to stay positive but feeling sad right now.


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## smoore

I just found out I'm pregnant and due in June 2015. I'm very cautiously excited! 

My first pregnancy, my son Connor was stillborn around 30 weeks on 3/7/13. They did tons of testing and it was not genetic. 

I'm currently under the care of a specialist, because we then struggled with infertility. 

He decided to keep me in his care until we make sure things are going smoothly. They already ran blood work once and said my numbers look great! Tuesday is another round of blood work. They said they will probably do this three times then I will come in for an early ultrasound. 

I feel like this is just going to be alright! We found out right around my husband's bday and I should be due right around my bday. I think that is a good sign. :)


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## Radiance

eblondie said:


> Hi. Please can I join? My due date is June 15th. Trying to stay positive but feeling sad right now.

Of course! Congratulations. I hope you are feeling a little better today :hugs:



smoore said:


> I just found out I'm pregnant and due in June 2015. I'm very cautiously excited!
> 
> My first pregnancy, my son Connor was stillborn around 30 weeks on 3/7/13. They did tons of testing and it was not genetic.
> 
> I'm currently under the care of a specialist, because we then struggled with infertility.
> 
> He decided to keep me in his care until we make sure things are going smoothly. They already ran blood work once and said my numbers look great! Tuesday is another round of blood work. They said they will probably do this three times then I will come in for an early ultrasound.
> 
> I feel like this is just going to be alright! We found out right around my husband's bday and I should be due right around my bday. I think that is a good sign. :)

I'm glad to hear you feel good about this pregnancy/baby. It can be so difficult to be. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of Connor <3 We've also done all test imaginable including genetic and they have found nothing. I'm actually scared to admit that I feel good this time around.


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## Radiance

Today I am feeling great!! I have been EXTREMELY exhausted and actually got a small but wonderful nap in! :thumbup: No sickness, some nausea here and there. I do crave alot!! And get hungry fast! I have gained FIVE pounds :wacko: Struggling to get all my water in for the day. I have a strong feeling we are carrying a baby girl... forgive me if I'm wrong :haha: 

So far, so good! I am absolutely scared to let my guard down and say that I feel good about this pregnancy though :nope: I did with Stephen and statically he should have been here; we lost him to a very rare cord infection. I just hate being in so many "1%"

Do any of you ladies do October 15th Remembrance Day? Here are my candles and whales a friend made for us in memory of our angels. I also brought 200 personalized candles for my friends' angels. <3 It will be a really special day.
 



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## smoore

I feel like I have to let myself enjoy this pregnancy. I can't let myself be negative the whole time with what ifs. 

I will be lighting a candle on the 15. :)


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## Radiance

smoore said:


> I feel like I have to let myself enjoy this pregnancy. I can't let myself be negative the whole time with what ifs.
> 
> I will be lighting a candle on the 15. :)

For me, I will always have some type of worry even if it's a really small amount. Normally on days like scans or dopplers. But I learned with Stephen that it helps to celebrate the small milestones :thumbup: I'm 6+2 today and thrilled!! It's going by quickly considering I found out at three weeks. Do you have an ideal of when your due date is? :)


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## Radiance

I would like to track this pregnancy. I blogged with Elijah and Stephen but I want to do a little more this time around. I'm thinking of not sharing until I go into labor (if all goes well). So I was considering getting professional photos done once a month? I was going to message around and share my story and what I would like to do... hopefully get a good deal. When do you ladies think I should start the photos?


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## smoore

Radiance said:


> For me, I will always have some type of worry even if it's a really small amount. Normally on days like scans or dopplers. But I learned with Stephen that it helps to celebrate the small milestones :thumbup: I'm 6+2 today and thrilled!! It's going by quickly considering I found out at three weeks. Do you have an ideal of when your due date is? :)

According to my last period, I am due on June 19. That is really neat, because it is my birthday! :) Best birthday gift ever! 



Radiance said:


> I would like to track this pregnancy. I blogged with Elijah and Stephen but I want to do a little more this time around. I'm thinking of not sharing until I go into labor (if all goes well). So I was considering getting professional photos done once a month? I was going to message around and share my story and what I would like to do... hopefully get a good deal. When do you ladies think I should start the photos?

I think it depends on when you personally start to show. I am a little bigger, so I don't start to show until fairly late and would feel silly taking pics of my fat! ha ha If you start showing earlier, start taking your pics whenever you want!! :)


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## DisneyMom2011

I'm due June 10th! :)


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## kerri28

We are due with our rainbow on June 7th but will deliver at 37weeks in may. This little ones due date is just a week before what would have been Hannah's due date this past summer. I'm so terrified every second of every day. It's so easy for so many people to tell me it will be fine this time and extremely rare it could happen again. All I say to that is "you told me it was extremely rare to have a sudden unexplained stillbirth in the first place!" I have next to no trust in any provider at the moment. We saw the heartbeat Monday and have scans every two weeks and every test recommended. I'm still scared. I don't know how I will ever relax. I'm scared to be excited and it all ripped from me again.


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## Radiance

DisneyMom2011 said:


> I'm due June 10th! :)

Congratulations!! 



kerri28 said:


> We are due with our rainbow on June 7th but will deliver at 37weeks in may. This little ones due date is just a week before what would have been Hannah's due date this past summer. I'm so terrified every second of every day. It's so easy for so many people to tell me it will be fine this time and extremely rare it could happen again. All I say to that is "you told me it was extremely rare to have a sudden unexplained stillbirth in the first place!" I have next to no trust in any provider at the moment. We saw the heartbeat Monday and have scans every two weeks and every test recommended. I'm still scared. I don't know how I will ever relax. I'm scared to be excited and it all ripped from me again.

It's awesome you've seen the heartbeat!! My scan is next week at nearly eight weeks. I hate when people say that. I'm in the 1%, I've lost two sons, a daughter and have had two early losses (chemical or blighted ovums). We lost our sons and daughter for different reasons and most of them very rare. That worry is always there but I found celebrating the small milestones made each step closer to the big day. I am also due around the same time as my daughter Hope was. I'm suppose to get induced a little early, so I could deliver on her due date.


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## Radiance

I hope everyone is doing well!! 

I've been doing great. I am dying for junk for all the time though :wacko: I do love mash potatoes and grilled onions right now as well. I have two appointments next week, first is OB and the second is scan. I've had a very strong feeling most of this pregnancy that we are having a girl. I had an incident today where my 48 pound child jumped off the couch onto my back. Took the wind right out of me. I've cried on and off since it's happened. I'm not showing any bad signs but obviously I can't help but worry. I plan on going to the ER when my husband gets off work tonight.


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## Radiance

Tonight I got to see my baby and heartbeat for the first time!!! :happydance: Scan was absolutely perfect, baby measured a few days behind. I'm pretty excited! My six hour visit was worth it. :)


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## jaan613

hiiiiii.
does the worrying and stressing get any easier?? *sigh* i guess for me i just can't wait to see/know of a heartbeat. im getting so impatient and the fact i'm having no symptoms is scaring me! :( i keep peeing on tests (i know, i'm crazy) just to see those double lines....i know it doesnt confirm a healthy pregnancy but still!
wish i could just relax and enjoy. trying to be positive and say a prayer everytime i feel or worry i may miscarry again.
how do you women try to stay positive and strong?


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## smoore

I have surprisingly just felt very calm since finding out. I think part of it is knowing how hard stress is on the body. I haven't had the horrible worry that I thought I would.


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## pink_phoenix

hi ladies i just wanted to join this lovely group.

first of all id like to say my heart goes out to you all that seem in the same position as be, still worrying about this pregnancy due to a previous loss. i wish you all the very best this time around xx

im about 7 weeks pregnant almost 4 months to the day since i lost my angel on my birthday.
it was an unexpected pregnancy but defo doesnt make it hurt any less.
this time round we were trying and really felt like it was going to take forever. i only tested as i had a massive tattoo session booked in.
felt fine up untill a few days ago now i cant stop sleeping and the time i am awake i feel constantly im going to be sick. just sitting up or walking to the toilet makes me queasy :(

Really hoping this time round goes much better. i had brain surgery about the time i would have conceived last time so hoping it was all down to the amount of drugs that was in my system at the time.
I also had to suffer the loss of my beloved pet dog which i cant imagine helped much either.

im still learning to live with the effects of the brain surgery but im completely drug free and have been since the op so fingers crossed i should be ok this time.

my EDD is 20th of June which is just before fathers days so that exciting for me and my partner. Also June is the month my dog originally came to live with us in 2001 so got alot of good memory's and times of that month to look forward to 


hope your all well and having a good halloween weekend

pink xxx


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## Radiance

How is everyone doing? 

My first high risk appointment with my new high risk doctor is on Monday! I'll be 13+3 :flower: Not much to update! I'm still exhausted and I have started getting severe nausea at 11.5 weeks.


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## Radiance

pink_phoenix said:


> hi ladies i just wanted to join this lovely group.
> 
> first of all id like to say my heart goes out to you all that seem in the same position as be, still worrying about this pregnancy due to a previous loss. i wish you all the very best this time around xx
> 
> im about 7 weeks pregnant almost 4 months to the day since i lost my angel on my birthday.
> it was an unexpected pregnancy but defo doesnt make it hurt any less.
> this time round we were trying and really felt like it was going to take forever. i only tested as i had a massive tattoo session booked in.
> felt fine up untill a few days ago now i cant stop sleeping and the time i am awake i feel constantly im going to be sick. just sitting up or walking to the toilet makes me queasy :(
> 
> Really hoping this time round goes much better. i had brain surgery about the time i would have conceived last time so hoping it was all down to the amount of drugs that was in my system at the time.
> I also had to suffer the loss of my beloved pet dog which i cant imagine helped much either.
> 
> im still learning to live with the effects of the brain surgery but im completely drug free and have been since the op so fingers crossed i should be ok this time.
> 
> my EDD is 20th of June which is just before fathers days so that exciting for me and my partner. Also June is the month my dog originally came to live with us in 2001 so got alot of good memory's and times of that month to look forward to
> 
> 
> hope your all well and having a good halloween weekend
> 
> pink xxx

For some reason I missed your post!! Congratulations!! How are you, baby, and pregnancy going? :happydance:


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## pink_phoenix

Radiance said:


> pink_phoenix said:
> 
> 
> hi ladies i just wanted to join this lovely group.
> 
> first of all id like to say my heart goes out to you all that seem in the same position as be, still worrying about this pregnancy due to a previous loss. i wish you all the very best this time around xx
> 
> im about 7 weeks pregnant almost 4 months to the day since i lost my angel on my birthday.
> it was an unexpected pregnancy but defo doesnt make it hurt any less.
> this time round we were trying and really felt like it was going to take forever. i only tested as i had a massive tattoo session booked in.
> felt fine up untill a few days ago now i cant stop sleeping and the time i am awake i feel constantly im going to be sick. just sitting up or walking to the toilet makes me queasy :(
> 
> Really hoping this time round goes much better. i had brain surgery about the time i would have conceived last time so hoping it was all down to the amount of drugs that was in my system at the time.
> I also had to suffer the loss of my beloved pet dog which i cant imagine helped much either.
> 
> im still learning to live with the effects of the brain surgery but im completely drug free and have been since the op so fingers crossed i should be ok this time.
> 
> my EDD is 20th of June which is just before fathers days so that exciting for me and my partner. Also June is the month my dog originally came to live with us in 2001 so got alot of good memory's and times of that month to look forward to
> 
> 
> hope your all well and having a good halloween weekend
> 
> pink xxx
> 
> For some reason I missed your post!! Congratulations!! How are you, baby, and pregnancy going? :happydance:Click to expand...

Thank you :flower:
I'm doing much better now, sickness is more manageable now, just the tiredness keeps kicking my butt. 

Xx :hugs:


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