# VENT THREAD! Things you wish you could say but can't



## laurac1988

Stolen from Second Tri! Hope you ladies don't mind!

Here's a ranting space for all your TTC stresses. Something you can't say out loud? say it here. Always better to get it out of your system...

Step MIL - STOP TELLING ME TO "look after belly"! There's no one in there! It's empty! Jees, juse leave us to it for a bit!

MIL - stop being so interfering. I know children are expensive. I know it might take a while. I understand you had a horrible pregnancy and delivery but doesn't mean I will.

General public - Quit being so DAMN STUPID!

Cousin - Yes I know you're pregnant. Do i need to hear about it every twenty seconds? Do i want to know how bad your morning sickness is? Not every two seconds I don't! Stop whining! You have three kids already you can't afford. Welcome to the new one. I shall enjoy paying for it with my taxes. (I don't feel the same about everyone on benefits. She's a blatant scrounger who could work if she got off her fat ass)


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## 2have4kids

Stupid Fkng AF came today wah wah wah. Really feel like screaming and crying at the same time. All that waiting, supplements, acupuncture and then today my dad's fam doctor called and he's not got dimentia as we thought last week, it's Parkinson's. My stress level is through the roof today and my back aches too. I'm so sad but can't share with people at work. Tears in my eyes. :(


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## bumble b

2have4kids that is so sad :cry: made me well up :hugs: 



laura i love the idea of this, i shall begin my rant lol.....

.....well on saturday after sulking for what felt like hours my dh finally orders me some ic's :happydance: paid 50p extra for 1st class postage so they would come today and the flippin things didn't come! i know it's only 50p but its the fact i wanted to spend Ronnie's nap time desperately trying to find a line that probably isn't even there anyway :growlmad: i emailed them and they said 10% of orders take 2 days! i know it sounds ridiculous but it's really annoyed me!
....and the stupid estate agent that we are selling our house through has been absolutely useless today! we are 11 weeks into a supposedly 8 week sale and purchase and i just want to move now :sad2: 


well thats my rant over with, sounds pathetic now its written down but i feel better for it :thumbup:


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## Storked

I'm just tired of pregnant people complaining to me. Shut up. I lost my baby last month and I would happily (and silently) suffer through morning sickness again.


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## Kimiw

So tired of hearing people ask me, "when are you and your husband going to have kids?" ABOUT 9 MONTHS AFTER I GET PREGNANT! We have been trying for 6 years, and people just assume we have something aginst having babies! I am soooooo tired of seing pregnant women and listening to pregnancy complaints!!! eeerrrrg!!!


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## cln1812

I am tired of having people ask me, "Don't you think it's time to give your daughter a little brother or sister?" and then the really mouthy ones point out, "You're not getting any younger, you know." As if I didn't know that?!!

I know DD is 4 1/2. I know most people have siblings closer together in age. There were reasons we delayed TTC again - DH was laid off twice, we thought we were going to lose our house, there was no way we could have handled another baby at the time, plus I was on tons of meds that were not TTC-friendly for depression and panic disorder, and now we're trying again, but, geez, it's just not happening fast this time around.

Mind your own business!


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## jcombs35

I wish everyone would stop sighing in relief each time I find out I'm not pregnant. I WANT to be! Yes, it would make my 4th child. Yes, I'm thankful for the 3 I already have, but we would like another one! Yes, I know how it happens, no, it's not in the water, and I think I'm old enough to make an informed decision as to whether or not to have another one!!

Every single time I have found out I am pregnant, my mother has made this God awful face as though I've just told her I have 6 months to live. I was her only one, and she didn't even want me. (She was glad to have me though. She just wasn't trying and didn't really want kids.) Just because she didn't want kids doesn't mean I don't! I take care of my kids. I don't pawn them off on other people and then act like I'm the world's greatest mother. Yes, I complain about them sometimes, but my life would be empty and meaningless without them. Yes, I want another one, and yes, I'm disappointed that it's not happening. Then you have the nerve to be upset because I don't talk to you about it? Come on...


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## veronica s

I wish the damn 2ww wasn't suck a mindf*ck!


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## laurac1988

Oh... I'm trying for a baby. When I talk to you about this, the last thing I want to hear is "I didn't even have to try. It just happened"! ARGH!


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## ChartsNHearts

laurac1988 said:


> Oh... I'm trying for a baby. When I talk to you about this, the last thing I want to hear is "I didn't even have to try. It just happened"! ARGH!

This made me laugh! My closest friend is the only person I've told that we're TTC and she replied with "Well, I wouldn't know anything about it, because we got pregnant on our first try"! (Not their first month - their one and only 'attempt'!!)

It certainly shut me up & I'm definitely not in a hurry to pour my heart out to anyone else after that! :laugh2:


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## LillyLouLou

God I love this thread! Lol

Mum - Stop telling me that not everyone is blessed with children and that's just life, when you had 5 healthy children easily!

Facebook...stop letting people post baby pics and fetal pics!! 

And why the f**k is everyone on the London Underground fricking pregnant!!...urgh and those stupid Baby on Board badges they all wear! I know you're pregnant you have a huge, beautiful bump you dont need a badge too! 

My body - Why can't you just do the one bloody job you're supposed to be capable of! 

OH - I love you very much but please please please stop smoking, I know it's just a few a week but it might be one more thing causing problems.

Friends - STOP HAVING BABIES! lol (not really, just remember how lucky you all are)


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## SBinRI

This is AWESOME!!

My mother was SO against the idea that my hub and I wanted one more.. I told her that a few months after my 3rd was born. She questioned me and berated me. Here we are a year later and she is always asking me if I'm pregnant, touching my stomach and asking if I'm sure I'm not because it looks like I've gained a few. At a restaurant the other day she told the waiter that yes- these were her grandkids- but she wished my hub would get off his ass and knock me up again!! HELLO!!! STFU! We are trying- but for us- not you! And it will happen when it does. Get off my Back lady!!


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## syrlatc

there are at least 5 people on my Facebook friend's list that are either pregnant or just had a baby.... I wish it was as easy as everyone is making it sound.... it's not.. I don't understand how all of these people that haven't been ttc just get pregnant... if the timing has to be right and everything has to be perfect.. how does it happen? don't you only have a 20% chance of conceiving every month? how are all of these people getting all of these happy surprises?? I would love to finally get my BFP and post it all over facebook bragging.. 

and stop making it sound so freaking easy... some of us are having difficulties conceiving and don't want to read about how it just happened for you... some of us would give ANYTHING to have a BFP and give everything to a little bundle of joy


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## tsyhanochka

Oh thank you for this! I want to keep positive but some days I just want to scream!!!!!

I want my OH to stop drinking, and he only drinks once maybe twice a week. I read it slows the swimmers down. 

To my sister, I want to tell her to suck it up, get a job that pays full time hours and move the heck out of my house. Or at least make my life a little easier and help out around the house without being asked, you're almost 30 sooooooooooo LAZY!!! |(then she complains on twitter that the 'harder she tries the more she pushes people away'...when have you really tried???)

To my coworker... don't tell me you have an 'eagle eye for detail and a passion for the work we do'... when you can't follow through with a task after a week, and I finish it in 4 seconds. 

And I want to tell my family that I'm opting to elope in August because I can't stand the thought of having them all in the city let alone same room for our special day. We're doing it our way.... alone. Peaceful. No logistics involved.

*sigh* thanks I needed that.


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## 2have4kids

ChartsNHearts said:


> laurac1988 said:
> 
> 
> Oh... I'm trying for a baby. When I talk to you about this, the last thing I want to hear is "I didn't even have to try. It just happened"! ARGH!
> 
> This made me laugh! My closest friend is the only person I've told that we're TTC and she replied with "Well, I wouldn't know anything about it, because we got pregnant on our first try"! (Not their first month - their one and only 'attempt'!!)
> 
> It certainly shut me up & I'm definitely not in a hurry to pour my heart out to anyone else after that! :laugh2:Click to expand...

I echo this completely, after she asked how I was doing my maid of honour, a very very good friend reminded me how easy it was for her to get pregnant the first time. Now she's done mat leave and told me a few months ago she's trying for her second. When I asked how that was going she said they were just fooling around and she wasn't really tracking her peak-yea right! The lady is a control freak. The next thing I expect to hear is that she's preggers. Both her sister and I have problems conceiving. It just feels like she's playing another very passively aggressive little mind game. Why are women so darn unsupportive and mean? 
I really am so so glad to have met the ladies on this site, it's really been a blessing for me each day. I so look forward to the kind thoughts people have here, the wisdom and experience, and the humour/threads like this! :haha:


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## genesismarie

to my best friend: just because your miserable and your son father dont want you got you hanging on the back of his coat tail dragging you around. dont be hater! how you been my best for four years but you want to put me down about ttc#2 you sneeze and get pregnant but always having a miscarriage now your so miss pro fucking birth control telling me i need to get back on birth control no you need to STFU. dont tell me about my fiancee and how you thinking about his parenting skills when you always calling me nagging about what yo sons dad dont do for your son. girl you need to stay on birth control and leave the ttc to the real mom. misery loves company 



*sigh* feel so great noe


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## cbbrankley

Cousin - Yes I know you're pregnant. Do i need to hear about it every twenty seconds? Do i want to know how bad your morning sickness is? Not every two seconds I don't! Stop whining! You have three kids already you can't afford. Welcome to the new one. I shall enjoy paying for it with my taxes. (I don't feel the same about everyone on benefits. She's a blatant scrounger who could work if she got off her fat ass)[/QUOTE]

I know what u mean. My cousin is about 7 months pregnant with her 4th child, all of whom have different fathers. I do feel bad that her 1st sons father was killed in a car accident when her son was two, but they were already seperated and she was pregnant by someone else. She has no job, tries to take everything she can from the governmant and everyone that tries to help. She has money to smoke weed but can't afford to take care of her children. She treats her oldest son like an inconvienience, (I asked her to let me adopt him but she gets a check for him because his father passed away so she won't). Her next son is living with his paternal grandmother. and she thakfully at least treats her little girl good when shes not pawning her off. She can't chose which ********, broke, good for nothing, jobless man she wants to be with, switching between at least two every other week. I'm sorry this is a long rant but it irks me soooo much that I am married to a great man that wants children, who has a great job and supports and loves me. He is 30 and I just turned 26 and we can't seem to have even one. *sigh*

and shes not even the only one I know like that :growlmad:


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## SBinRI

tsyhanochka said:


> Oh thank you for this! I want to keep positive but some days I just want to scream!!!!!
> 
> I want my OH to stop drinking, and he only drinks once maybe twice a week. I read it slows the swimmers down.
> 
> To my sister, I want to tell her to suck it up, get a job that pays full time hours and move the heck out of my house. Or at least make my life a little easier and help out around the house without being asked, you're almost 30 sooooooooooo LAZY!!! |(then she complains on twitter that the 'harder she tries the more she pushes people away'...when have you really tried???)
> 
> To my coworker... don't tell me you have an 'eagle eye for detail and a passion for the work we do'... when you can't follow through with a task after a week, and I finish it in 4 seconds.
> 
> And I want to tell my family that I'm opting to elope in August because I can't stand the thought of having them all in the city let alone same room for our special day. We're doing it our way.... alone. Peaceful. No logistics involved.
> 
> *sigh* thanks I needed that.

Lol! In regards to your wedding- def do it your way!! I just got married (in Nov) for the 2nd time. The second we got engaged my MIL was planning shit. I didn't want a wedding the first time!! So we ade some plans.. And told our very close fam and friends a week before. Had a nice family party at our home and everyone was gona within a couple hours. And I didn't have all sorts of well-meaning advice and input to irritate the crap outta me!!


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## Bazinga

SIL - I do not want to hear that all BIL has to do is "sneeze in your direction and your pregnant" Good for you - if it's true he's got some weird ass snot and needs seen by a doctor. Just shut up for once!


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## AlyCon

Thank goodness for this thread!! So i already HATE going on facebook because of all the pregnant girls and new moms that are constantly posting statuses and pictures about their babies and it makes so me jealous i could explode!!!! But today when i logged in i was greeted with a wall post notification. A friend from highshool posted something to me on my wall, so i clicked to go to my page. 

Her post read:  "So now that you're married when are we going to see little Alyson's running around? lol"

I WAS FURIOUS AND MORTIFIED!!!! :growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:

But i tried to keep my cool. I wanted to delete it but i didnt want to seem rude or give off the impression that i was angry or over sensistive. And besides, this girl is really nice and im sure that if she knew what i was going through she wouldnt have done this. 

So I replied saying that i was just so stressed out with getting ready for the move that i hadnt even had time to think about that sort of thing. 

*Heres what i wanted to say: * "Well if you must know, every moment of my life is consumed with thoughts about having a baby! I spend all day researching and on forums talking about how much i want a child. However, i'm so damn unlucky that i have PCOS, and getting pregnant will be hard for me, and staying pregnant will be even harder. I have the wonderful option of taking harmful medications that MIGHT work, or trying natural supplements that MIGHT work, seeing as there is NO CURE for my illness. Also you might like to know that i DIE a little inside everytime i see a pregnant woman, whether its on facebook or in person and i hate myself for being so jealous but i cant help it. The fact that i may not be able to give my husband a child, while little 15 year old sluts seem to be able to conceive by just SEXTING turns me into a stark raving mad lunatic!! I just dont understand!! And for another fun fact: I get so depressed and mad at my self everytime i delusionally symptom spot and take a pregnancy test just to get a BFN and be dissapointed! In fact, i cried myself to sleep last night for that very reason. Some days i really wonder how much more of this i can take, and im not even actively trying to conceive yet. And when we do start ttc it will have to be this big secret just between me and my husband because neither of our families is supportive of us having a child right now and dont seem to understand why we would have the audacity to tell them that we can make our own decisions! Just more drama to add to my life.. So in conclusion, i'm miserable, childless, miserable about being childless and possibly being doomed to a life of struggle and infertility, and sometimes i truly think that if i cant have a child that it makes me a useless human being and that i'm not worthy of being called a woman or a wife or even being alive for that matter. So thanks for asking me this insensitive question on facebook for the world to see and digging the knife in even deeper. If i kill myself tonight, you should know its because of you. But dont worry, since we're cool, i'll give you a shout out in my suicide note. Any more questions???" BITCH!! 

Well i'm glad i got that off my chest :)


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## Daners82

My sister is the only one I've told I'm off the pill now and trying. 

My mother told me that my sister was going to buy me some pre-natal vitamins. Really mom? Cause my sister knows I've been taking them for a month! She didn't say that! She was just trying to get it out of me if we are trying!

And I would also tell my family and co-workers that I know I will be 60 when my child is 30. I can do math! Thanks! :thumbup:


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## rihanna

I want to say this outloud to my best friend:

I love you so much but it is breaking my heart to see you 1 week away from your due date and its gonna be even harder to come round and snuggle your tiny bundle. I am so happy you got pregnant straight away both time...good for you.....but saying it all the time does not help me fall pregnant!! 


I honestly thought i would have been pregnant within 3 months (HOW NAIVE) next month is month 11 and i am heartbroken :(


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## veronica s

To my DH.....I wish you could be happier that we are trying for a baby. And I wish you would just show me more affection and interest.

To my mind and body......please stop f*cking around with me. I just want to know already.


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## tsyhanochka

I have one more to add. I caught OH smoking yesterday and he dropped the cigarette when he saw me coming like I wouldn't notice. This after he promised he had quit his casual smoking months ago. I have to wonder now if he ever quit. Makes me so upset that I seem more committed to this ttc effort than he is. And he did it on the day af shows up moving us to cycle 8. He knows how much this hurts more every month af shows up. Why are men so stubborn? It was his idea to stop smoking in the first place!!!

/rant


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## pinkhope

This is a great thread ladies!!!

If one more person tells me to "Just stop trying and it will happen!" I'm going to have to try really hard not to punch them in the face!!! Or "It will happen when it's meant to happen!" That doesn't make the waiting any easier!

Every time one of my new mom/dad friends complains to me about being exhausted and how hard it is having a newborn, I want to tell them "shut up at least you have a baby!"

Like most of you other ladies, I can't stand the women who say "Oh my husband just has to look at me and I get pregnant!" UGH.. just shut up! 

And no offense meant at all to the ladies with other children trying for number 5, 6 & more, but sometimes I just think "Well obviously you'll get pregnant eventually, you've done it 5 times already!" I really don't mean to offend any of you trying for big families, it just stings sometimes when some of us ladies are in such a struggle to even get to #1 :(


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## jcombs35

pinkhope said:


> This is a great thread ladies!!!
> 
> If one more person tells me to "Just stop trying and it will happen!" I'm going to have to try really hard not to punch them in the face!!! Or "It will happen when it's meant to happen!" That doesn't make the waiting any easier!
> 
> Every time one of my new mom/dad friends complains to me about being exhausted and how hard it is having a newborn, I want to tell them "shut up at least you have a baby!"
> 
> Like most of you other ladies, I can't stand the women who say "Oh my husband just has to look at me and I get pregnant!" UGH.. just shut up!
> 
> And no offense meant at all to the ladies with other children trying for number 5, 6 & more, but sometimes I just think "Well obviously you'll get pregnant eventually, you've done it 5 times already!" I really don't mean to offend any of you trying for big families, it just stings sometimes when some of us ladies are in such a struggle to even get to #1 :(


I am currently ttc #4, and am going through some issues. Waiting to test Friday. During my times of frustration, I have considered how much more frustrating it must be for those trying for #1. DH and I went three years ttc #1, with no luck. I wanted it so bad, and I hated seeing pregnant women or people with babies, so I do kind of know what that feels like. I honestly don't know if I can say anything to make you feel better. Just wanted to say I do understand where you're coming from.:hugs:


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## MissFernandez

I know this is gonna sound really bad, but im going to rant about my OH and a few other people

*rant on* He seems to be under the impression that just because we will have the best dr for when we get pregnant he seems to think that 'nothing will go wrong' in the way of me having PCOS. He seems to think that we will have have a healthy pregnancy and that I wont be at risk of losing it. Everytime I talk to him, it's just the same old answer " Babe it's okay, we'll get though it because we'll have the best Dr and Ob/Gyn so you wont lose our baby or your body wont fail because of the PCOS " Argh it's like FFS man, I've got just as much faith as what you have in my own body to make it 'sticky' and yes im bloody scared about it all! 

Ladies! what do I do?? Do I educate him more about PCOS or do I just write off his opinion?? 

Oh and the snarky woman in the shops the other day who thought I was preg because my overcoat made my belly round.. No I don't need your frikkin help and no I don't frikkin want to know about a Maternity Bra! *rant off*


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## pinkhope

Just wanted to say thank you jcombs -- I kind of felt bitchy after writing that!! But it's a vent!!! And it's how I feel sometimes! :hugs:

This TTC thing brings up strange feelings :/


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## jcombs35

pinkhope said:


> Just wanted to say thank you jcombs -- I kind of felt bitchy after writing that!! But it's a vent!!! And it's how I feel sometimes! :hugs:
> 
> This TTC thing brings up strange feelings :/

Exactly- it is a vent. I took no offense to it. I can certainly see where you're coming from. Your post made me think. :-k


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## J_Lynn

AlyCon said:


> Thank goodness for this thread!! So i already HATE going on facebook because of all the pregnant girls and new moms that are constantly posting statuses and pictures about their babies and it makes so me jealous i could explode!!!! But today when i logged in i was greeted with a wall post notification. A friend from highshool posted something to me on my wall, so i clicked to go to my page.
> 
> Her post read:  "So now that you're married when are we going to see little Alyson's running around? lol"
> 
> I WAS FURIOUS AND MORTIFIED!!!! :growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:
> 
> But i tried to keep my cool. I wanted to delete it but i didnt want to seem rude or give off the impression that i was angry or over sensistive. And besides, this girl is really nice and im sure that if she knew what i was going through she wouldnt have done this.
> 
> So I replied saying that i was just so stressed out with getting ready for the move that i hadnt even had time to think about that sort of thing.
> 
> *Heres what i wanted to say: * "Well if you must know, every moment of my life is consumed with thoughts about having a baby! I spend all day researching and on forums talking about how much i want a child. However, i'm so damn unlucky that i have PCOS, and getting pregnant will be hard for me, and staying pregnant will be even harder. I have the wonderful option of taking harmful medications that MIGHT work, or trying natural supplements that MIGHT work, seeing as there is NO CURE for my illness. Also you might like to know that i DIE a little inside everytime i see a pregnant woman, whether its on facebook or in person and i hate myself for being so jealous but i cant help it. The fact that i may not be able to give my husband a child, while little 15 year old sluts seem to be able to conceive by just SEXTING turns me into a stark raving mad lunatic!! I just dont understand!! And for another fun fact: I get so depressed and mad at my self everytime i delusionally symptom spot and take a pregnancy test just to get a BFN and be dissapointed! In fact, i cried myself to sleep last night for that very reason. Some days i really wonder how much more of this i can take, and im not even actively trying to conceive yet. And when we do start ttc it will have to be this big secret just between me and my husband because neither of our families is supportive of us having a child right now and dont seem to understand why we would have the audacity to tell them that we can make our own decisions! Just more drama to add to my life.. So in conclusion, i'm miserable, childless, miserable about being childless and possibly being doomed to a life of struggle and infertility, and sometimes i truly think that if i cant have a child that it makes me a useless human being and that i'm not worthy of being called a woman or a wife or even being alive for that matter. So thanks for asking me this insensitive question on facebook for the world to see and digging the knife in even deeper. If i kill myself tonight, you should know its because of you. But dont worry, since we're cool, i'll give you a shout out in my suicide note. Any more questions???" BITCH!!
> 
> Well i'm glad i got that off my chest :)

I teared up reading this because it's exactly how I think every damn time someone asks that ... but at the same time I laughed because I know how you feel and it would be great to see someones reaction if that is the answer they finally get .... *hugs* I am right there with you girl.


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## hunni12

My heart goes out to you ladies..and to those people who either says it will just or think they know everything when it comes down to a baby tell them to kiss your asses with cherry red lipstick. Because everybody body is different.


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## AlyCon

J_Lynn said:


> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> Thank goodness for this thread!! So i already HATE going on facebook because of all the pregnant girls and new moms that are constantly posting statuses and pictures about their babies and it makes so me jealous i could explode!!!! But today when i logged in i was greeted with a wall post notification. A friend from highshool posted something to me on my wall, so i clicked to go to my page.
> 
> Her post read:  "So now that you're married when are we going to see little Alyson's running around? lol"
> 
> I WAS FURIOUS AND MORTIFIED!!!! :growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:
> 
> But i tried to keep my cool. I wanted to delete it but i didnt want to seem rude or give off the impression that i was angry or over sensistive. And besides, this girl is really nice and im sure that if she knew what i was going through she wouldnt have done this.
> 
> So I replied saying that i was just so stressed out with getting ready for the move that i hadnt even had time to think about that sort of thing.
> 
> *Heres what i wanted to say: * "Well if you must know, every moment of my life is consumed with thoughts about having a baby! I spend all day researching and on forums talking about how much i want a child. However, i'm so damn unlucky that i have PCOS, and getting pregnant will be hard for me, and staying pregnant will be even harder. I have the wonderful option of taking harmful medications that MIGHT work, or trying natural supplements that MIGHT work, seeing as there is NO CURE for my illness. Also you might like to know that i DIE a little inside everytime i see a pregnant woman, whether its on facebook or in person and i hate myself for being so jealous but i cant help it. The fact that i may not be able to give my husband a child, while little 15 year old sluts seem to be able to conceive by just SEXTING turns me into a stark raving mad lunatic!! I just dont understand!! And for another fun fact: I get so depressed and mad at my self everytime i delusionally symptom spot and take a pregnancy test just to get a BFN and be dissapointed! In fact, i cried myself to sleep last night for that very reason. Some days i really wonder how much more of this i can take, and im not even actively trying to conceive yet. And when we do start ttc it will have to be this big secret just between me and my husband because neither of our families is supportive of us having a child right now and dont seem to understand why we would have the audacity to tell them that we can make our own decisions! Just more drama to add to my life.. So in conclusion, i'm miserable, childless, miserable about being childless and possibly being doomed to a life of struggle and infertility, and sometimes i truly think that if i cant have a child that it makes me a useless human being and that i'm not worthy of being called a woman or a wife or even being alive for that matter. So thanks for asking me this insensitive question on facebook for the world to see and digging the knife in even deeper. If i kill myself tonight, you should know its because of you. But dont worry, since we're cool, i'll give you a shout out in my suicide note. Any more questions???" BITCH!!
> 
> Well i'm glad i got that off my chest :)
> 
> I teared up reading this because it's exactly how I think every damn time someone asks that ... but at the same time I laughed because I know how you feel and it would be great to see someones reaction if that is the answer they finally get .... *hugs* I am right there with you girl.Click to expand...

Thanks! Sometimes i wonder how poeple would react too. Because I seriously feel like people ask questions that they dont want a REAL answer to. Like when some one asks "are you ok?" they dont really want to know about your problems, they expect you to say "I'm fine!" so they can feel better about themselves for asking even though they didnt really help you at all. I've learned that about people over the years. So now i only ask people questions that i could actually handle an honest answer from. But i think i'm just a more genuine, caring person than most of these insensitive jerks out here lol


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## Bazinga

Relax. Really? RELAX? 

That is your advice? Glad to see medical school taught you well.

Shove your advice where the sun don't shine


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## MissFernandez

AlyCon said:


> Thank goodness for this thread!! So i already HATE going on facebook because of all the pregnant girls and new moms that are constantly posting statuses and pictures about their babies and it makes so me jealous i could explode!!!! But today when i logged in i was greeted with a wall post notification. A friend from highshool posted something to me on my wall, so i clicked to go to my page.
> 
> Her post read:  "So now that you're married when are we going to see little Alyson's running around? lol"
> 
> I WAS FURIOUS AND MORTIFIED!!!! :growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:
> 
> But i tried to keep my cool. I wanted to delete it but i didnt want to seem rude or give off the impression that i was angry or over sensistive. And besides, this girl is really nice and im sure that if she knew what i was going through she wouldnt have done this.
> 
> So I replied saying that i was just so stressed out with getting ready for the move that i hadnt even had time to think about that sort of thing.
> 
> *Heres what i wanted to say: * "Well if you must know, every moment of my life is consumed with thoughts about having a baby! I spend all day researching and on forums talking about how much i want a child. However, i'm so damn unlucky that i have PCOS, and getting pregnant will be hard for me, and staying pregnant will be even harder. I have the wonderful option of taking harmful medications that MIGHT work, or trying natural supplements that MIGHT work, seeing as there is NO CURE for my illness. Also you might like to know that i DIE a little inside everytime i see a pregnant woman, whether its on facebook or in person and i hate myself for being so jealous but i cant help it. The fact that i may not be able to give my husband a child, while little 15 year old sluts seem to be able to conceive by just SEXTING turns me into a stark raving mad lunatic!! I just dont understand!! And for another fun fact: I get so depressed and mad at my self everytime i delusionally symptom spot and take a pregnancy test just to get a BFN and be dissapointed! In fact, i cried myself to sleep last night for that very reason. Some days i really wonder how much more of this i can take, and im not even actively trying to conceive yet. And when we do start ttc it will have to be this big secret just between me and my husband because neither of our families is supportive of us having a child right now and dont seem to understand why we would have the audacity to tell them that we can make our own decisions! Just more drama to add to my life.. So in conclusion, i'm miserable, childless, miserable about being childless and possibly being doomed to a life of struggle and infertility, and sometimes i truly think that if i cant have a child that it makes me a useless human being and that i'm not worthy of being called a woman or a wife or even being alive for that matter. So thanks for asking me this insensitive question on facebook for the world to see and digging the knife in even deeper. If i kill myself tonight, you should know its because of you. But dont worry, since we're cool, i'll give you a shout out in my suicide note. Any more questions???" BITCH!!
> 
> Well i'm glad i got that off my chest :)

My thoughts exactly honey!! I can never comprehend how people can be so insensitive about us woman who have PCOS. They have no idea how it feels to tell our boyfriends/fiancees/husbands that we might possibly not be able to give them children. It angers me to think that these 14,15, 16 year old s**ts can have babies naturally and think it's cool to be a Teen Mum. IT'S FERKING NOT OKAY!! IF YOU DONT WANT YOUR CHILDREN GIVE THEM TO WOMAN WHO CANT HAVE CHILDREN! Im so jealous of all those woman who are pregnant, and when I see them in the street I think I wish that could be me. I keep telling my OH what a failure I am to be considered to be his girlfriend and that he could find a woman who could give him children without difficulty, but he keeps telling me he loves me and he wouldn't want anyone else. 

Im just dreading the talk with my OH about how hard it will be for us to TTC and to tell him how hard the emotional rollercoaster will be for him. He keeps telling me he loves me for who I am and that whatever happens will happen. But I dont think he will understand just how hard the struggle will be for us. 

The rants just keep coming.... :nope:


----------



## jcombs35

Well, I really am starting to feel a bit selfish. All you ladies are trying to hard just to have your first one, and I'm freaking over ttc #4. I really honestly wish you the best of luck. But really, whether it's your first or your tenth, if you are actively _trying _to get pregnant and can't, it is extremely frustrating. I have never gotten pregnant "easily." The first three years, hubby and I tried and tried with no luck, then finally got pregnant and had a miscarriage. I remember the fear and apprehension I felt during that time about not being able to get pregnant and carry a pregnancy to term well. I remember feeling like I wasn't a whole woman. 

When I hear someone struggling, I tend to say things like, "quit trying so hard." or "Just be patient." because it's the only thing I can think to say. I never realize how hurtful that may be or how insensitive it may sound.


----------



## AlyCon

MissFernandez- I tell my husband the same things and he swears he still loves me and he doesnt think any less of me. But i'm still really hard on myself about it, and the last thing i need is to have insensitive rude people nosing around in my PRIVATE PERSONAL business! It just makes me feel worse. On the bright side, i have an appointment coming up to see if i can start treatment since i'll be ttc soon. So hopefully i'll start seeing some progress in the near future. It just sucks that we have to keep ttc a secret from our families, but oh well. 

Jcombs35- I am sorry for your loss. Congrats on your beautiful three, and good luck with number four. Its stories like yours that give me hope :hugs:


----------



## jcombs35

AlyCon said:


> MissFernandez- I tell my husband the same things and he swears he still loves me and he doesnt think any less of me. But i'm still really hard on myself about it, and the last thing i need is to have insensitive rude people nosing around in my PRIVATE PERSONAL business! It just makes me feel worse. On the bright side, i have an appointment coming up to see if i can start treatment since i'll be ttc soon. So hopefully i'll start seeing some progress in the near future. It just sucks that we have to keep ttc a secret from our families, but oh well.
> 
> Jcombs35- I am sorry for your loss. Congrats on your beautiful three, and good luck with number four. Its stories like yours that give me hope :hugs:

Thank you. I'm glad I could give you some hope. Sometimes we're stuck in the middle of our storms in life and we can't see the whole picture. We sometimes get to the point where all we can think of is all the negative things that are going to happen! And how ironic that ttc makes you so stressed out and crazy and yet that stress can make it so hard to conceive!


----------



## Bebebump

Alycon... I flippin' LOVED your post!!! I think you should have Facebook posted it. Sometimes it's better to piss everyone off at the same time.


----------



## MissFernandez

AlyCon said:


> MissFernandez- I tell my husband the same things and he swears he still loves me and he doesnt think any less of me. But i'm still really hard on myself about it, and the last thing i need is to have insensitive rude people nosing around in my PRIVATE PERSONAL business! It just makes me feel worse. On the bright side, i have an appointment coming up to see if i can start treatment since i'll be ttc soon. So hopefully i'll start seeing some progress in the near future. It just sucks that we have to keep ttc a secret from our families, but oh well.

My H2B says he doesnt think any less of me either and that what will come with come. Im also still really hard on myself too, and you're right the last thing we need is insensitive people sticking their nose in on OUR PRIVATE business. We are keeping our TTC Journey quiet to our family too, only confided in basically our GP and a few VERY VERY close friends of our plans. 

We are trying to naturally TTC first, then when we get frustrated and feel like we're getting nowhere then we'll try treatment. Good Luck for your journey!


----------



## AlyCon

Bebebump said:


> Alycon... I flippin' LOVED your post!!! I think you should have Facebook posted it. Sometimes it's better to piss everyone off at the same time.

Thanks! If we werent keeping our ttc a secret i totally would have!! I can only imagine everybodys face if they were to log in and see that! :haha:


----------



## LKPone

My rant would be...

To you dumbass NHS doctors - cop on, will you?! I'm 32 years old and didn't have a period for 7 months after coming off the pill and you think that was NORMAL?! Really? You then send me for scans and see my one ovary is covered in cysts and you say that it's fine. Really? Then after I have enough braincells to realise for myself that it's not actually fine (because guess what... google teaches you a lot, you should check it out sometime, you might be able to actually buy your medical degree on there somewhere!), your colleague says that he 'supposes' he can refer me to a specialist. Well thank you very much, it's really useful having you in this world! :dohh: So where do you people send me? To the flipping general gynae unit - yes, that's right - pregnant people galore!! Like, I'm the ONLY non-pregnant one! After 3 months and 2 visits, you eventually tell me that you THINK I have PCOS and that you can't do anything for me and that you're referring me to the specialist fertility unit. Congratulations Genius! Without even a day at medical school, I could have told you that's where I need to be. You then tell me that the private specialist I consulted in South Africa put the 'cart before the horse' by giving me Clomid, because you have to first investigate WHY I'm not having periods. Again... really?! :growlmad: You flipping useless Tonsils... I'm not having periods because I'm not ovulating! Geez, flip and bloody hell... cop on, will you? And you say to me 'we should maybe look at your weight'... hmm... funny you should say that, because I have to look at it every day and I see it piling on rapidly since I came off the pill, no matter how many Weight Watchers points I count! So do me a favour, get your fingers out of your butts, treat me like a human being, not a bloody target statistic and HELP me! Do your bloody job and help me. That's all I'm asking. Tonsils.

Rant over... WHEW! :winkwink:


----------



## jcombs35

LKPone said:


> My rant would be...
> 
> To you dumbass NHS doctors - cop on, will you?! I'm 32 years old and didn't have a period for 7 months after coming off the pill and you think that was NORMAL?! Really? You then send me for scans and see my one ovary is covered in cysts and you say that it's fine. Really? Then after I have enough braincells to realise for myself that it's not actually fine (because guess what... google teaches you a lot, you should check it out sometime, you might be able to actually buy your medical degree on there somewhere!), your colleague says that he 'supposes' he can refer me to a specialist. Well thank you very much, it's really useful having you in this world! :dohh: So where do you people send me? To the flipping general gynae unit - yes, that's right - pregnant people galore!! Like, I'm the ONLY non-pregnant one! After 3 months and 2 visits, you eventually tell me that you THINK I have PCOS and that you can't do anything for me and that you're referring me to the specialist fertility unit. Congratulations Genius! Without even a day at medical school, I could have told you that's where I need to be. You then tell me that the private specialist I consulted in South Africa put the 'cart before the horse' by giving me Clomid, because you have to first investigate WHY I'm not having periods. Again... really?! :growlmad: You flipping useless Tonsils... I'm not having periods because I'm not ovulating! Geez, flip and bloody hell... cop on, will you? And you say to me 'we should maybe look at your weight'... hmm... funny you should say that, because I have to look at it every day and I see it piling on rapidly since I came off the pill, no matter how many Weight Watchers points I count! So do me a favour, get your fingers out of your butts, treat me like a human being, not a bloody target statistic and HELP me! Do your bloody job and help me. That's all I'm asking. Tonsils.
> 
> Rant over... WHEW! :winkwink:

I absolutely hate doctors who think they know so much better than we do because they have a medical degree. They give us no credit for knowing our own bodies! They act as if everything we have researched is just untrue internet advice!

Have you found a different doctor?


----------



## LKPone

jcombs35 said:


> I absolutely hate doctors who think they know so much better than we do because they have a medical degree. They give us no credit for knowing our own bodies! They act as if everything we have researched is just untrue internet advice!
> 
> Have you found a different doctor?

I've now been referred to the specialist fertility unit, so I have my appointment on the 9th July. So no more having to deal with useless GPs - who actually said to me 'You're trying to conceive right? Well, we would NEVER get involved in that'. I wish I was joking! :nope:

We'll see what they say on the 9th, but having called them yesterday, I already know that I won't be scanned or anything, so who knows. :shrug: I'll see how it goes and might opt for going private - it'll squeeze the budget a bit, but it may just be do-able. Better to have no money and no stress than be stressing constantly because you only see someone every 3 months, who doesn't even perform the most basic of scans etc. So we'll see, thanks for hearing me out! :thumbup:


----------



## jcombs35

LKPone said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> I absolutely hate doctors who think they know so much better than we do because they have a medical degree. They give us no credit for knowing our own bodies! They act as if everything we have researched is just untrue internet advice!
> 
> Have you found a different doctor?
> 
> I've now been referred to the specialist fertility unit, so I have my appointment on the 9th July. So no more having to deal with useless GPs - who actually said to me 'You're trying to conceive right? Well, we would NEVER get involved in that'. I wish I was joking! :nope:
> 
> We'll see what they say on the 9th, but having called them yesterday, I already know that I won't be scanned or anything, so who knows. :shrug: I'll see how it goes and might opt for going private - it'll squeeze the budget a bit, but it may just be do-able. Better to have no money and no stress than be stressing constantly because you only see someone every 3 months, who doesn't even perform the most basic of scans etc. So we'll see, thanks for hearing me out! :thumbup:Click to expand...

That's just awful. I've learned over the years that if I am seeing a doctor who won't hear me out or acts incredibly rushed everytime I see them, it's best to find another one. You get in there and they rush, and make you feel rushed and then the next thing you know, you've forgotten questions you had. They certainly make enough money to listen to their patients and give them answers. If they can't even do that, they are not getting my money!


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## laurac1988

ok... if you don't like my blog, don't read it! Simples! Don't comment and give me you're RIDICULOUS views about a life you're not living. If you don't agree with sperm donation that's fine - but i have to wonder why someone who doesn't agree with it is reading a sperm donation blog


----------



## jcombs35

laurac1988 said:


> ok... if you don't like my blog, don't read it! Simples! Don't comment and give me you're RIDICULOUS views about a life you're not living. If you don't agree with sperm donation that's fine - but i have to wonder why someone who doesn't agree with it is reading a sperm donation blog

Huh?


----------



## Storked

jcombs35 said:


> laurac1988 said:
> 
> 
> ok... if you don't like my blog, don't read it! Simples! Don't comment and give me you're RIDICULOUS views about a life you're not living. If you don't agree with sperm donation that's fine - but i have to wonder why someone who doesn't agree with it is reading a sperm donation blog
> 
> Huh?Click to expand...

It's her vent. Says in her signature that she blogs with a link. Someone was probably being a snot on it.


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## foxyviola

Oooft great thread!!

The next person who asks me "am I back at work yet" and "when am I back at work" or "ooh werent your work good to let you have time off" is going to get a slap. Week after week after week after week Ffs some times ten people a day. If I'm at a party or social event, I'm prickling because I know the question is coming any second and bam, sure enough it does. I feel the anger and irritation rising, but I just nod and smile. What I want 
to say is : Ffs I'm on maternity leave which I'm entitled to, despite the fact that my baby died. It's a small reward the waste of what 2011 turned out to be. Can you not just let me enjoy my time off and recover, without constant reminders of work. Oh and it's my entitlement and right, work being good about it dosent come into the equation you NOB.
I'm back at work in the middle of July, so you will all be pleased to know I'm BACK EARNING MY KEEP as that's all you are all concerned about.
Think of another question bore off how about asking me how I'm coping after the death of my child, that would be a new one aaaaaaaaarrrrrrggggggggghhhhhh.
Oooft that's better. Rant over.
I know people are just being polite and making conversation but after the 100th person and the 1000th time, I sooooo wanna punch their lights out.


----------



## veronica s

foxyviola said:


> Oooft great thread!!
> 
> The next person who asks me "am I back at work yet" and "when am I back at work" or "ooh werent your work good to let you have time off" is going to get a slap. Week after week after week after week Ffs some times ten people a day. If I'm at a party or social event, I'm prickling because I know the question is coming any second and bam, sure enough it does. I feel the anger and irritation rising, but I just nod and smile. What I want
> to say is : Ffs I'm on maternity leave which I'm entitled to, despite the fact that my baby died. It's a small reward the waste of what 2011 turned out to be. Can you not just let me enjoy my time off and recover, without constant reminders of work. Oh and it's my entitlement and right, work being good about it dosent come into the equation you NOB.
> I'm back at work in the middle of July, so you will all be pleased to know I'm BACK EARNING MY KEEP as that's all you are all concerned about.
> Think of another question bore off how about asking me how I'm coping after the death of my child, that would be a new one aaaaaaaaarrrrrrggggggggghhhhhh.
> Oooft that's better. Rant over.
> I know people are just being polite and making conversation but after the 100th person and the 1000th time, I sooooo wanna punch their lights out.

Oh hun, I'm incredibly sorry. I can't imagine the heartache you must be going through. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. :hugs:


----------



## jcombs35

Storked said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> laurac1988 said:
> 
> 
> ok... if you don't like my blog, don't read it! Simples! Don't comment and give me you're RIDICULOUS views about a life you're not living. If you don't agree with sperm donation that's fine - but i have to wonder why someone who doesn't agree with it is reading a sperm donation blog
> 
> Huh?Click to expand...
> 
> It's her vent. Says in her signature that she blogs with a link. Someone was probably being a snot on it.Click to expand...

Oooppss.. I see. Sorry. I get confused quite easily!


----------



## MissFernandez

OK... im about to have the biggest f**king rant I've ever had on a forum.. ( only cuz this is the only place I can say this :haha: )

Wow... how can people be so low??? Really honestly. Seriously. You know you've REALLY upset me when my fiancee doesn't know whether to be angry or upset.

Got a lovely welcoming to the soon to be "in laws" but that quickly turned sour cuz one half is being a total asshole! :growlmad: It's not often your mother in law (to be) is pissed off, your fiancee is pissed off and im in tears all because some wanker is against his step-son and daughter in law (to be) sleeping together.. 

YES FOLKS, that is what this is all about.... A simple sleeping arrangement. Really what is the really huge frikking deal about 2 people who love each other and are soon to marry each other sleeping in the same bed?? Really seriously??? So I guess when we have kids they will be unwelcome up here too?? ( We're out at the family home in Country SA) 

It's not very often someone brings me to tears and it's not often that someone actually pisses off my Godly husband (to be) and then his mother on top of that, but tonight really took the cake... My H2B said to his mum how can someone hurt 3 innocent people because of a moral?? I said well it's simple.. you can just come by yourself, and then he'll get the picture.. 

Argh so f..king sick to people's shit, just got rid of one person who didnt like me being happy now I have to deal with a f..king inlaw (to be) who has a problem with his step-son sleeping with his wife (to be)..

Oh and one more thing mate, that stupid little piss taking comment you made when I was sitting on the sofa rubbing hubby to be's back, it's called pain asshole, and it's called Ankylosing Spondylitis something which he cant help!!.. :cry:

p.s Ankylosing Spondylitis is a incurable condition which effects the movement of the spine.. Hardly something to laugh about?!?!?! :growlmad:


----------



## tsyhanochka

In good fashion my mother called me with bad news (that's the only calls I get from her, she never calls with good news or just to talk).
Stepdad is in the hospital again. Stroke and possibly heart attack, a blood infection on top of those. His MS is getting worse, he can't even swallow right now. He at least knows where he is and who he is. He can barely speak though and is very weak on one side. 

I asked about him not getting released to home and hoping they get him into some long term care finally, my mom isn't capable of taking care of herself most days let alone his high needs.... nurse said he's a long way from that decision. 

Mom praised the extramural nurse who was helping her set up paperwork for in home care should he get released...and how wonderful she was etc etc..... to which I responded, 'oh, is that the same services and paper work I told you to get set up 6 months ago, and was willing to help you all you had to do was make one bloody phonecall to get it all started'

All she needed to do was make one phone call that I couldn't make, and I would follow up with everything. 'Too busy' she said... 'it will take too much time to get the help' she said. OMFG he could have had support all this time and made stronger to fight through this but nope. Her lazy selfishness triumphed and he's suffering because of it. 

And to top that off, I found out a former coworker had a baby 3 weeks ago, and a very good friend's wife is pregnant but I heard that through the grapevine instead of from them. 

FML All I want to do is cry today and snuggle with my dog, my furbaby. Thank god I took the day off to give myself a 4 day weekend. 

thanks for letting me vent (again) ladies. I really appreciate it.


----------



## CaliDreaming

I have SO enjoyed reading this thread and it has been just what I needed. Yesterday I got a BFN at 10 dpo after feeling some mild AF type cramps. I wasn't expecting anything but I was still cranky and depressed. I was in one of those moods where you're not happy about anybody else's bfp, no matter whether they've been trying longer than you or whatever their story is.

Sometimes it helps when I just get the feelings out and then I feel much more able to feel happy for pregnant women. It takes a lot of energy for me to hold the negativity inside and to pretend to be cheerful when I'm torn up inside.


----------



## CdnEquestrian

MissFernandez - Hey! Another person with AS! I have AS too, and deal with severe chronic pain 24/7. I often get epidural spinal injections and sacroilliac joint injections, plus am on long-acting morphine 24/7. It's not a fun disease to have, that's for sure. :(

Do they not know that you're TTC, i'm guessing then? Otherwise sleeping in the same bed wouldn't be an issue.... lol


----------



## katelynnb

AlyCon said:


> Thank goodness for this thread!! So i already HATE going on facebook because of all the pregnant girls and new moms that are constantly posting statuses and pictures about their babies and it makes so me jealous i could explode!!!! But today when i logged in i was greeted with a wall post notification. A friend from highshool posted something to me on my wall, so i clicked to go to my page.
> 
> Her post read:  "So now that you're married when are we going to see little Alyson's running around? lol"
> 
> I WAS FURIOUS AND MORTIFIED!!!! :growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:
> 
> But i tried to keep my cool. I wanted to delete it but i didnt want to seem rude or give off the impression that i was angry or over sensistive. And besides, this girl is really nice and im sure that if she knew what i was going through she wouldnt have done this.
> 
> So I replied saying that i was just so stressed out with getting ready for the move that i hadnt even had time to think about that sort of thing.
> 
> *Heres what i wanted to say: * "Well if you must know, every moment of my life is consumed with thoughts about having a baby! I spend all day researching and on forums talking about how much i want a child. However, i'm so damn unlucky that i have PCOS, and getting pregnant will be hard for me, and staying pregnant will be even harder. I have the wonderful option of taking harmful medications that MIGHT work, or trying natural supplements that MIGHT work, seeing as there is NO CURE for my illness. Also you might like to know that i DIE a little inside everytime i see a pregnant woman, whether its on facebook or in person and i hate myself for being so jealous but i cant help it. The fact that i may not be able to give my husband a child, while little 15 year old sluts seem to be able to conceive by just SEXTING turns me into a stark raving mad lunatic!! I just dont understand!! And for another fun fact: I get so depressed and mad at my self everytime i delusionally symptom spot and take a pregnancy test just to get a BFN and be dissapointed! In fact, i cried myself to sleep last night for that very reason. Some days i really wonder how much more of this i can take, and im not even actively trying to conceive yet. And when we do start ttc it will have to be this big secret just between me and my husband because neither of our families is supportive of us having a child right now and dont seem to understand why we would have the audacity to tell them that we can make our own decisions! Just more drama to add to my life.. So in conclusion, i'm miserable, childless, miserable about being childless and possibly being doomed to a life of struggle and infertility, and sometimes i truly think that if i cant have a child that it makes me a useless human being and that i'm not worthy of being called a woman or a wife or even being alive for that matter. So thanks for asking me this insensitive question on facebook for the world to see and digging the knife in even deeper. If i kill myself tonight, you should know its because of you. But dont worry, since we're cool, i'll give you a shout out in my suicide note. Any more questions???" BITCH!!
> 
> Well i'm glad i got that off my chest :)

LOL I so understand. You just want to go off on people on fb but instead you send something nice and then come here and rant :)


----------



## katelynnb

ugh

TTC after MC in feb. We got pregnant the first time we were trying no problems until the mc. It has been 4 months of let down each time AF arrives.

Sometimes I just want to jump off a bridge or hurt myself. ( I wouldnt do either) sometimes the thought of hurting myself sounds better then always thinking about the disappointment of a negative test. It just aches inside. Most days I am fine but their are days that I just want to crawl into a hole.

I know one day it will happen but when????? Why is it people who dont want it get pregnant so easily while the ones who do suffer.

Oh the other kicker is my job since I am a contract massage employee I had to go out of state to work three days after my d&c they said I wasnt happy enough for their girls to pump them up for their races. they have decided they dont want me to work trips with them anymore. Sorry I wasnt being a cheerleader but I also wasnt crying and frowning the whole time. I had a fake smile and cheery attitude I guess it wasnt enough.

Yet another friend who has tried for one month is pregnant( she didnt really want to get pregnant until next yr), another one has been trying for a few months and is pregnant and the other 8 friends of mine are between 5-8 months pregnant ( I would have been 6 1/2 months along). And one told me she got an abortion because it doesnt fit into her life to be pregnant now WTF ASSHOLE YOU COULD HAVE TOLD SOMEONE ELSE THAT!!!!!!


Sometimes friends give the worst advice. I dont need to be given their opinion or an answer. Sometimes I just need someone to listen and let me cry. It also doesnt help when your mom and mother in law makes comments well whenever you finally give us a grandbaby. URGH I AM SO MAD AT LIFE and honestly mad at God.

we havent even been married a yr. So I try and focus on that and spending time with my husband getting to know him and building a strong relationship. But having kids is something we have both wanted to have since we were children. So it is really hard on both of us. 

Sorry this is a huge confusing rant but sometimes just writing things out is what i need. Especially when I can't go to any of my friends since they are all pregnant.


----------



## nmberg

thankfully we haven't really told anyone we are ttc. they only person i really said yes we are is one of my nearest and dearest friends and she is excited for us to be. she has a one year old daughter and wants a playmate for her!! my problem is with my MIL she treats my husband and I like crap and i cant deal with it anymore and i just need to vent to someone other than my hubby and friends for a change. i just don't know how you can treat two kids like they are the best thing since sliced bread then treat your "baby" like a red headed step child?!?!?! i know we are both strong willed, independant, and stubborn but really where do you get off treating people like garbage?? for goodness sakes that is your child!! you wanted him and now this is what you do to him after he bends over backwards for you!!!! ARGGH!!!!! I just don't know what to do anymore! hopefully this will help!!!


----------



## MissFernandez

CdnEquestrian said:


> MissFernandez - Hey! Another person with AS! I have AS too, and deal with severe chronic pain 24/7. I often get epidural spinal injections and sacroilliac joint injections, plus am on long-acting morphine 24/7. It's not a fun disease to have, that's for sure. :(
> 
> Do they not know that you're TTC, i'm guessing then? Otherwise sleeping in the same bed wouldn't be an issue.... lol

My Husband (to be) has it. He often has the sacroilliac joint injections as well, including Simponi Injections every month to help ease the pain.. plus a myriad of other tablets... I just get so pissed off how people think that it's "all cool" and that they think it's fun to take the mickey out of people who live with and deal with pain on a daily basis.. ( although I give my hubby to be more back massages than I get :haha:) 

It's definately not nice, but we know that they do the job and it improves his quality of life a bit more untill we get a bit older ( gosh feel so old now at 25 :haha:) 

Good luck and we send you heaps of Babydust! :dust:


----------



## zoomlentil

My biggest vent is that the amount of people who tell me I'm too young to start a family is staggering. Firstly, I'm 22, not 14, and secondly, why the hell is it anyone else's business?? 

And then those bright sparks who tell me that I'm just a spring chicken and have plenty of time down the track for kids later? Thank goodness I don't own a shotgun!! AARGH!


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## MissOleiane

My rent would be to my MIL:

The only reason we don't have children is because we CAN'T, not because we DON'T WANT to. Stop speculating why and stop saying it's because we're selfish! Your own son is about done with you and i won't talk him out of never speaking to you again.

She hurts me so much, but somehow, i don't think telling her this to her face would help anything.


----------



## CdnEquestrian

I'm 27....and i'm sick and tired of people telling me how YOUNG I am and how much TIME I have to have children.....DH is 39...and doesn't want to TTC once he hits 40. Our clock is ticking!!!!


----------



## tsyhanochka

Found out today that OH had mumps as a toddler. Wondering if that will factor into our trying. He didn't know the English word for it until I looked up the terms in Ukrainian... FML


----------



## J_Lynn

tsyhanochka said:


> Found out today that OH had mumps as a toddler. Wondering if that will factor into our trying. He didn't know the English word for it until I looked up the terms in Ukrainian... FML

Mumps will hinder fertility?? I had never heard of that! I will have to google that and try to read up on it!


----------



## zoomlentil

J_Lynn said:


> tsyhanochka said:
> 
> 
> Found out today that OH had mumps as a toddler. Wondering if that will factor into our trying. He didn't know the English word for it until I looked up the terms in Ukrainian... FML
> 
> Mumps will hinder fertility?? I had never heard of that! I will have to google that and try to read up on it!Click to expand...

I just looked it up briefly and it mentions a chance of fertility issues for teenage and adult men, rather than babies/toddlers. It also stated that the chance of infertility was quite low but for peace of mind probably a good thing to check out.


----------



## CaliDreaming

I'm expecting AF tomorrow, and I guess it's the PMS, but I just feel completely sad, hopeless, and tired. I have been actively conceiving for six months, but it's felt like a liftetime. I have been doing everything I possibly can do to get pregnant, and it's not enough. I ovulate regularly, my LP is long, temps are high, but still nothing is happening.

I see women who can get pregnant so easily, and these days I really hate them. Some not only can get pregnant easiy, but get the gender that they want, the exact type of birth that they want, no troubles with bf. And then they can sit back and lecture the rest of us about what we're doing wrong, about how ungrateful we are, etc.

I am so thankful for my dd, but I had to struggle to conceive her as well. Some people don't have to go through this and it's just not fair. I spent the whole morning crying and wondering what I did that was so bad that I deserve to go through this month after month.

I am just tired tired tired.

And my coworker better leave me alone today because I am not in the mood for him to try to dump some of his work on me right before I try to take a couple of days off. I am in a mood where I could easily bite someone's head off.


----------



## Storked

I am tired of chicks posting their pregnancy on FB when they are barely pregnant. I never even did that when I thought my pregnancy would go smooth and I lost it at 12 weeks. Their posts don't make me sad, just completely stressed out for them.


----------



## J_Lynn

Women who post about how they're trying everything to get pregnant, to turn around and exclaim they're pregnant - and then say this was their first month TTC. REALLY?!?!?! I think it is a slap in the face for all these women "trying to conceive" posting about their "struggles" and they haven't ever dealt with this before. I really don't think you're "trying to conceive" when you're less than a month - after 3 months or so, then you can start being like the rest of us and worrying about why it isn't working. But sorry I DONT FEEL BAD FOR YOU THAT IT TOOK YOU 2 WEEKS TO GET PREGNANT. 

Maybe I'm just extra cranky because AF has decided to stay gone for so long and this is just putting me back at square one for trying, but seriously - I was with my exhusband for 3.5 years and never got pregnant, and now my new husband and I have been NPNT for a year, and actively trying for over 6 months now. 

Blah - maybe I just need to go to bed. But either way. That really grinds my gears.



*EDIT: My hubby said I am just being pissy. He said, "Baby, everyone who wants a baby is trying to conceive - you never have a baby unless you start trying and just like you, people need a place to go to ask questions!"

.... so sorry ladies, I am just being pissy. :( I'm going to go to bed now and stop being a B :)


----------



## MissFernandez

Storked said:


> I am tired of chicks posting their pregnancy on FB when they are barely pregnant. I never even did that when I thought my pregnancy would go smooth and I lost it at 12 weeks. Their posts don't make me sad, just completely stressed out for them.

Funny you say that, one of my close girlfriends posted her pregnancy 12 week scan on FB the other day. although she told me at 6 weeks, it's getting to the stage now where I'm actually sick of hearing about it and seeing it, even though im excited for her, it's getting really annoying. 

She knows how hard it will be for me so why must people gloat about how easy it is???


----------



## CSC2

The main thing that bothers me is these girls both teenagers and in their 20's that went to my high school, they all sleep around with the same people and pass along HPV then they're on Facebook talking about how they have PCOS, then a few months later they're on Facebook talking about how they got pregnant without even trying. PCOS is not a joke and neither is HPV but you got a sexually transmitted disease by your own actions, if you know it's not true then why go online and try to justify what you have?? Own up to it or don't say anything, women with PCOS struggle to conceive everyday.

I also had a friend from high school who later served in my wedding which was one month after hers, who posted on FB that they were expecting. It would have been hard on me either way, but a call or even text would have been nice instead of having to read it on there.


----------



## CaliDreaming

J_Lynn said:


> Women who post about how they're trying everything to get pregnant, to turn around and exclaim they're pregnant - and then say this was their first month TTC. REALLY?!?!?! I think it is a slap in the face for all these women "trying to conceive" posting about their "struggles" and they haven't ever dealt with this before. I really don't think you're "trying to conceive" when you're less than a month - after 3 months or so, then you can start being like the rest of us and worrying about why it isn't working. But sorry I DONT FEEL BAD FOR YOU THAT IT TOOK YOU 2 WEEKS TO GET PREGNANT.
> 
> Maybe I'm just extra cranky because AF has decided to stay gone for so long and this is just putting me back at square one for trying, but seriously - I was with my exhusband for 3.5 years and never got pregnant, and now my new husband and I have been NPNT for a year, and actively trying for over 6 months now.
> 
> Blah - maybe I just need to go to bed. But either way. That really grinds my gears.
> 
> 
> 
> *EDIT: My hubby said I am just being pissy. He said, "Baby, everyone who wants a baby is trying to conceive - you never have a baby unless you start trying and just like you, people need a place to go to ask questions!"
> 
> .... so sorry ladies, I am just being pissy. :( I'm going to go to bed now and stop being a B :)

LOL. I'm with you. How can anyone legitimately complain about how hard TTC is when they've never even had to experience one BFN??? Your hubby is being very literal like a typical guy.


----------



## tsyhanochka

J_Lynn said:


> Women who post about how they're trying everything to get pregnant, to turn around and exclaim they're pregnant - and then say this was their first month TTC. REALLY?!?!?! I think it is a slap in the face ...... But sorry I DONT FEEL BAD FOR YOU THAT IT TOOK YOU 2 WEEKS TO GET PREGNANT.

I feel the same way. We are in cycle 8 and I am from a super fertile family so I feel like a dud and its not even a year! 

I know we haven't tried as long as most but you are right, if they haven't seen a single bfn its just not the same. And its not like they ask questions...they just boast about what they did to make it happen.

Grrrrrr this is my vent too now.


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## teako22

To my family. Quite asking me if I'm pregnant yet. I will tell you when it happens and when I want to.


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## pinksprinkles

Wish I could update my FB status to say: You (you know who you are) DO NOT deserve to have a baby. In fact, you didn't deserve to get married after cheating on your (at the time) boyfriend. I still can't believe he took you back. You are selfish, self-centered, and a total ***** to him. And to all the rest of you on FB who must constantly post 5000 pictures of your baby bump, please use your damn settings to block me from seeing the pics. You know how hurtful it is that you don't. And seriously? You want me to "not take it too hard if _ turn out to be one of those people who just can't have kids"??? Go screw yourself! <---That quote was said to me by a friend who gave birth 2 weeks ago while I was holding her baby yesterday. WTF!?!?_


----------



## CSC2

pinksprinkles said:


> Wish I could update my FB status to say: You (you know who you are) DO NOT deserve to have a baby. In fact, you didn't deserve to get married after cheating on your (at the time) boyfriend. I still can't believe he took you back. You are selfish, self-centered, and a total ***** to him. And to all the rest of you on FB who must constantly post 5000 pictures of your baby bump, please use your damn settings to block me from seeing the pics. You know how hurtful it is that you don't. And seriously? You want me to "not take it too hard if _ turn out to be one of those people who just can't have kids"??? Go screw yourself! <---That quote was said to me by a friend who gave birth 2 weeks ago while I was holding her baby yesterday. WTF!?!?_

_

My husband's SIL pulls the same stuff :/ she is always running around on my BIL and to keep herself occupied from their unhappy marriage she just keeps having kids. And she says "Oh I hurt so bad for ya'll and here I am getting pregnant not even trying." UGHH_


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## rosenrot

My family: STFU. I'm 28 and happily married for almost a year. We lived together for 2 1/2 years. I can get pregnant if I damn well please.

Facebook people: thank your lucky stars that I can block your posts. I don't need to know every detail of your pregnancy or see the 184,735,867th photo of your precious little angel. Stop it.

:finger::finger::finger:


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## laurac1988

Just :-(


----------



## CaliDreaming

pinksprinkles said:


> Wish I could update my FB status to say: You (you know who you are) DO NOT deserve to have a baby. In fact, you didn't deserve to get married after cheating on your (at the time) boyfriend. I still can't believe he took you back. You are selfish, self-centered, and a total ***** to him. And to all the rest of you on FB who must constantly post 5000 pictures of your baby bump, please use your damn settings to block me from seeing the pics. You know how hurtful it is that you don't. *And seriously? You want me to "not take it too hard if  turn out to be one of those people who just can't have kids"??? Go screw yourself! <---That quote was said to me by a friend who gave birth 2 weeks ago while I was holding her baby yesterday. WTF!?!?[/*_QUOTE]
> 
> Someone actually said that to you??? Wow. It's hard enough having to deal with our own personal despair without having to deal with insensitve comments like that. It's so hard to understand how people can be so cruel and unfeeling._


----------



## Odi

Thank goodness i found this tread...

Here goes.. 

Dear Body... JUST WORK NORMALLY!!!!!!!!! i mean fukin honestly.. this is what you are made to do.. so just do it already!!!!
i am so sick of tryin and tryin and poppin one pill after the next.. cough mixture for this asprin for that.. clomid that makes me ill and not to mention the fkin AWESOME two week wait!!!!!!!! then after the first round of "super clomid" my cycles are comleteley fkin different down to 26 days???? i mean WTF???

DP... i love you so very much.. but you can be such a ass!!!!!! AND WHY CANT YOU FIND A JOB THAT KEEPS YOU AT HOME MORE THAN ONE FCKIN WEEK EVERY 3 MONTHS!!!!!!!!! how are we suppose to do this WHEN YOU ARE NOT HERE!!!!!! AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

and now.. friends and work mates... STOP ASKING ME "WHY ARE YOU SO GRUMPY" get FCKED!!!!!! leave me alone! let me be sad.. let me be unhappy.. let me be lonely and let me get though this... 

im so tired of crying alone.. im so tired of going though this by myself.. im so tired of Peeing on a stick and it slapping me in the face with a BFN..


----------



## Eternity

Have just found this thread (great idea Laura) and I'm pretty sure it will become a favourite.

Hubby, seriously I know TTC is quite stressful and it can't be nice having to perform on demand as it were, but seriously?? It's the one thing you need to contribute to this!!! If I say I'm due to ovulate any moment that means we should be dtd EVERY day!! You don't have to temp and chart and test and google and look out for signs but not symptom spot and stress and worry and buy all the aids and look into other aids/methods to help. No all you need to do is actually want to have sex with your wife, is that really too much to ask????

I love my husband dearly but sometimes I just want to shake him and make him realise how much more stressful this is on me! Men are so oblivious, and this mostly refers to me expecting to O yesterday and us not BDing!


----------



## Eternity

Oh I have another rant to go on....

An old school friend of mine that I haven't seen for ages, but we used to be very close does have a tendency to post pointless statuses, rant and say things that would be better off said directly to the person they are aimed at rather than shared with the whole world on fb!

A couple of months ago she announced to the whole world (well fb) that her and her DF are 'officially trying for a baby'. I swear if I lived near her I'd have shaken her and yelled 'do you realise how much added pressure you've just put on yourself?!'

Then two days later she's posting about her caffiene buzz and too much coffee :dohh:
Thankfully another friend of hers who has a baby informed her that caffiene is bad for TTC.
I sent her a pm and told her we were also TTC. She told me she thought having a second child would be great for us?! 
Excuse me???? I was trying to be supportive and helpful (sharing tips etc) but instead I get a snarky comment, and I could feel the snark coming off the message! It felt like she was just being polite but obviously thinks itd be unfair for me to have two kids when she hasn't had one yet. Never mind that she's only been with her bloke for just over a year, whereas I've been married for nearly six years!

I'm sorry to be one of those girls but I fell pregnant with DD by accident, definitely no trying, as I was only 17 at the time. We weren't in a serious relationship at the time so I did most of it by myself. Hubby and I have been properly together and living together for seven years and have never prevented pregnancy since then. Well it didn't 'just happen' again in all that time and now we are trying just as desperately as she is!! In fact maybe more so considering the effort I've been putting in which obviously she hasn't if she's hyped up on too much caffiene and still smoking and drinking!

And breathe! Lol. Sorry for the length of that rant, but.....
Wow, feels good to get that off my chest!!


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## rosenrot

I've got another one.

STFU people who only want to adopt. Yeah, it's great that you want to do that some day, but DON'T make me feel bad for wanting to conceive. Yeah, there are tons of kids who need good homes, but I want a kid that's biologically connected to me. My family histsory is really cool and important to me, and I want to pass that down to someone who it would mean something to. Sorry if that makes me a selfish a prick.


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## mssassy713

Hate hearing I didn't have to try. Who cares...


----------



## tsyhanochka

3 people I know are preggers, Oct & Dec due dates.... I can't go to another baby shower and not be expecting... the last one hurt way too much. I cried the whole way there.


----------



## J_Lynn

tsyhanochka said:


> 3 people I know are preggers, Oct & Dec due dates.... I can't go to another baby shower and not be expecting... the last one hurt way too much. I cried the whole way there.

I come down with a "cold" every one I'm invited to ... say I'm too sick and just don't want to risk getting the knocked up one sick. I have avoided them, so I don't know how I would handle it - but I can pretty much guaranty it would end up with me crying myself to sleep in my hubbys arms that night after :cry:


----------



## Quindalyn

You accidentally got pregnant with your first and it took you under a year to get pregnant with your second! YOU ARE NOT INFERTILE so shut the hell up!


----------



## futrbabymaker

Dear Cousin in law, you have SEVEN children. SEVEN. You Do NOT know how I feel so PLEASE stop saying that you do! 

To my cousin: Relaxing will not get me pregnant, neither will ignoring my doctor's advice, neither will any of the other RIDICULOUS things you have suggested. They WON'T work and you should really stop saying that my infertility is my own fault...Unless you'd like to be punched, which can be arranged. Stop telling me to ask my 18 year old sister who is in nursing school and who hasn't even had the chance to have a baby of her own to be a surrogate for me. I would not do that! 

To all of the other people who want to continue to make rude comments. First of all, I have been dieting for years, I have PCOS and thyroid issues, it's not something that is easy to control. I am not overweight by choice. I eat less than most of the skinny people I know!! Secondly, your "caring" comments about the perfect timing and "maybe it's not meant to be" are UNWARRANTED and completely rude. Finally, I don't need you to tell me what it's like to raise a child, I AM raising a child. Just because you regret yours does not mean that I will regret mine or that I regret raising my nephew. So please shut up.


----------



## Eternity

If you've changed your mind or are having doubts, then have the fucking courage to tell me so and I'll back off!
It's completely unfair to just ignore the issue and leave me to crumble alone!


----------



## J_Lynn

futrbabymaker said:


> Dear Cousin in law, you have SEVEN children. SEVEN. You Do NOT know how I feel so PLEASE stop saying that you do!
> 
> To my cousin: Relaxing will not get me pregnant, neither will ignoring my doctor's advice, neither will any of the other RIDICULOUS things you have suggested. They WON'T work and you should really stop saying that my infertility is my own fault...Unless you'd like to be punched, which can be arranged. Stop telling me to ask my 18 year old sister who is in nursing school and who hasn't even had the chance to have a baby of her own to be a surrogate for me. I would not do that!
> 
> To all of the other people who want to continue to make rude comments. First of all, I have been dieting for years, I have PCOS and thyroid issues, it's not something that is easy to control. I am not overweight by choice. I eat less than most of the skinny people I know!! Secondly, your "caring" comments about the perfect timing and "maybe it's not meant to be" are UNWARRANTED and completely rude. Finally, I don't need you to tell me what it's like to raise a child, I AM raising a child. Just because you regret yours does not mean that I will regret mine or that I regret raising my nephew. So please shut up.

I just stood up in my living room and clapped. :thumbup:


----------



## AlyCon

To my family: 
NO I'M NOT PREGNANT YET!! I just got married in december and my husband and i havent even had time to have the sex that leads to pregnancy because he's been away for Army training- AND YOU KNOW THIS!! You sound like a bunch of fucking five year olds who think that "marriage + kissing = BABY" ..Well it doesnt!! Grow the fuck up and use some common sense! 

And to my friend from high school:
I'm happy for you! I really am! But from the day you found out you were pregnant you've been blowing up my facebook news feed with pictures and statuses every five minutes and its annoying! Did you really think the whole world wanted to see a picture of the pregnancy test that you PEED ON! Well i didnt! and all the pictures and posts after that have only dug the knife in further. I'll admit im jealous but its not like i havent tried to be supportive of you. I spent damn near $100 on clothes for your baby even though you cant even seem to be able to save my number in your phone, seeing as every time i text you you respond with "who is this?" ITS THE PERSON WHO EMPTIED HER BANK ACCOUNT BUYING SHIT FOR YOUR KID, THATS WHO! Thanks for making me feel like crap (but at least you were decent enough to say thank you)! And now that you've had the kid, its even worse. Believe me, I'm glad he's happy and healthy and cute, BUT I DONT WANT TO SEE FIFTY PICTURES OF HIM EVERY TIME I LOG ON AND I CERTAINLY DONT WANT TO READ ABOUT HIS *"POOPY!" *


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## Storked

Whoa unfriend her AlyCon!


----------



## AlyCon

Storked said:


> Whoa unfriend her AlyCon!

I've seriously thought about it! But we were really close in high school and its just one of those situations where people just grow apart and get on with their own lives. Its just the kind of person i am, like if i called you friend at one point i will always look out for you. It just sucks that i'm still being considerate and generous to people who obviously could care less about me. I think i'm just going to unsubscribe that way i dont have to see her posts unless i want to. Cuz like i said we were really close and if her baby ever needed something i would still get it. I feel so sad sometimes always buying baby stuff for every one else and wondering if i will ever be buying this stuff for my own child :cry: Sorry i just unleashed all that emotion on you! :dohh:


----------



## Storked

I understand about the friendship loyalty. :hugs:
This is the vent thread so no apologies over emotion. You say it girl! We are all here for ya!


----------



## AlyCon

:hugs: thanks!


----------



## CaliDreaming

AlyCon said:


> Storked said:
> 
> 
> Whoa unfriend her AlyCon!
> 
> I've seriously thought about it! But we were really close in high school and its just one of those situations where people just grow apart and get on with their own lives. Its just the kind of person i am, like if i called you friend at one point i will always look out for you. It just sucks that i'm still being considerate and generous to people who obviously could care less about me. I think i'm just going to unsubscribe that way i dont have to see her posts unless i want to. Cuz like i said we were really close and if her baby ever needed something i would still get it. I feel so sad sometimes always buying baby stuff for every one else and wondering if i will ever be buying this stuff for my own child :cry: Sorry i just unleashed all that emotion on you! :dohh:Click to expand...

I can definitely understand not wanting to unfriend since you two were close at one point. Unsubscribing is a great idea. It's so sad when you grow apart from a friend.

This woman better lavish all kinds of presents on your baby when you get pregnant for all that you're having to put up with!!!


----------



## MeeShell

Sister: Oh you're pregnant? I'm happy, I really am. But you're 26, don't have a job, got pregnant by a complete AS*HOLE who you argue with constantly, have yet to quit smoking, and you get mad at our parents because they don't have the kind of food you want, and you say how you feel bad for your baby because you aren't eating...yet you still continue to smoke and are always able to pay for those and do god knows what else? GET A JOB! Stop playing the victim. Stop expecting hand outs and grow the EFF up! You can't afford to feed yourself, how do you plan on feeding your child? Yet a stable couple like my husband and I, who own our own home, and are financially stable have been trying for over 3 years for a baby with no luck?! 

Sisters friend who already has 2 children she can't take care of that just posted 7 week ultrasound pictures on fb: Oh your baby doesn't like cigarettes? It makes you sick you say? THEN QUIT! You are growing a human inside of you you ignorant d*uche, you can't quit smoking to protect your child's LIFE?? I feel sorry for your existing children who wear clothes 5x too small, are always covered in dirt, and still wearing a DIAPER at the age of 5......but again, a deserving, loving couple who have been happily married for years and would never take having a child for granted can't. UGH it makes me SO angry I want to cry.

Whew, that felt good...great idea OP : )


----------



## tsyhanochka

My sister is living with us until she gets back on her feet.

The little things are getting to me but the big one today I found she used all but one tampon. I had a full value pack and a dozen others so we are talking 60+ tampons in the last 2 months. I knew she dipped into them on her last cycle and I know how few I used on my last cycle. I just noticed the empty box. 

Who does that AND DOESN'T TELL YOU???? 
I told OH and he asked if she was selling them LOL 
Glad I have back up night pads and noticed it before AF next week.


----------



## AlyCon

CaliDreaming said:


> This woman better lavish all kinds of presents on your baby when you get pregnant for all that you're having to put up with!!!

But she wont! I already know she wont, and neither will the other girls who i bought baby things for. And im not even all that upset about it cuz all of them are pretty much poor. Theyre not homeless or anything but they still live with parents and both them and their boyfriends (cuz of course theyre not married!!) will have to work just to buy supplies for their child. The thing that made me most upset is that when she was still pregnant she made a post on FB asking how to apply for government assistance and all the other unwed teen moms commented telling her how to get it. It made so mad because of course theyre all having babies but the married and financially stable one (ME!!!) isnt able to conceive as easily. Grrr!


----------



## zoomlentil

MeeShell said:


> Sister: Oh you're pregnant? I'm happy, I really am. But you're 26, don't have a job, got pregnant by a complete AS*HOLE who you argue with constantly, have yet to quit smoking, and you get mad at our parents because they don't have the kind of food you want, and you say how you feel bad for your baby because you aren't eating...yet you still continue to smoke and are always able to pay for those and do god knows what else? GET A JOB! Stop playing the victim. Stop expecting hand outs and grow the EFF up! You can't afford to feed yourself, how do you plan on feeding your child? Yet a stable couple like my husband and I, who own our own home, and are financially stable have been trying for over 3 years for a baby with no luck?!
> 
> Sisters friend who already has 2 children she can't take care of that just posted 7 week ultrasound pictures on fb: Oh your baby doesn't like cigarettes? It makes you sick you say? THEN QUIT! You are growing a human inside of you you ignorant d*uche, you can't quit smoking to protect your child's LIFE?? I feel sorry for your existing children who wear clothes 5x too small, are always covered in dirt, and still wearing a DIAPER at the age of 5......but again, a deserving, loving couple who have been happily married for years and would never take having a child for granted can't. UGH it makes me SO angry I want to cry.
> 
> Whew, that felt good...great idea OP : )

Wow, I know how you feel here. 

I know someone who is my age and is already pregnant with her second child. She's a chain smoker and it looks like she'll be smoking right the way through her pregnancy. :dohh: She's a complete dero and I absolutely cannot stand her! Ugh! Why her and not me?


----------



## pinksprinkles

This is to no one really, but I am so angry in general. I quit smoking two years ago so I could have a healthy pregnancy when my husband and I were ready to conceive and without changing my diet I managed to gain 20lbs in 2 weeks, then another 60lbs in the next 3 months. (My hormones went absolutely insane, and due to a recent sports injury, I could not put enough weight on my ankle to exercise at all.) Of course, this slowed down my cycles until I was only having one every 2-3 months. 

Then, when the weight was finally coming off (because I was eating like 1000 calories a day even though my body technically needs 2100 a day) and my cycles had gotten back to normal I got on a new supplement. Not only did the supplement completely stop my cycles, but it caused me to gain another 30lbs!!! Mother of &%#$%&! I ended up 10 pounds HEAVIER than I was before!!! And now I haven't had a period in over 4 months. Uggggg!!!! :brat:

Luckily, with constant calorie counting, the weight is finally coming off again. I lost 5 lbs in the last month. But I'm still 223 lbs, up from 140 when I quit smoking. 

And get this: I went to the midwife last week for a fertility appt and after explaining all of this to her, I heard a nurse whisper to another nurse, while looking in my direction, that people who can't even take care of their own health shouldn't even try to get pregnant. And something about how of course I can't get pregnant if I'm so fat.

WTF? Seriously??? Were you not right there when I was explaining to my midwife how much hell I have gone through since ripping up my ankle and quitting smoking??? For *** sake! I was a varsity soccer player! My softball team won state competitions. I was a figure skater all through high school and a gymnast before that. I am not some overeating, video-game-playing, whiny brat living on my mom's couch. I am a grown woman who has gone through 2 years of hell who is about thiiis far away from snapping. To that nurse: You try going from a size 9 to a size 20 in 4 months and see how you friggin feel!!!

And the real kicker? Even though I wish I could get in shape, no one will even bother to reconstruct the ligaments in my ankle because in their minds, what would an obese person like me need with an athletically able ankle anyway? I mean, why bother?

Maybe I should have just kept smoking. Statistically speaking, the amount of weight I am carrying now is far more unhealthy than the number of cigs I was smoking then, and the cigs didn't cause this level of infertility.

FML.

Sorry ladies. Just had to get that out.


----------



## Eternity

Awww :hugs: pinksprinkles!
If I were you I would put a complaint in about that nurse, how very unprofessional to speak about a patient in that way, especially when said patient is in ear shot!!

Also keep making a fuss until they fix your ankle!!


----------



## Eternity

Ok seriously?! Old friend I vented about previously who announced to the whole world that she was TTC, has now posted a stays on fb declaring how long the wait until the end of the month seems when you're waiting to take a pregnancy test!!

Omg does she not realise how crappy negative tests make you feel, let alone if you had to share it with everybody you've ever known!!! Grrrr.


----------



## pinksprinkles

Eternity said:


> Ok seriously?! Old friend I vented about previously who announced to the whole world that she was TTC, has now posted a stays on fb declaring how long the wait until the end of the month seems when you're waiting to take a pregnancy test!!
> 
> Omg does she not realise how crappy negative tests make you feel, let alone if you had to share it with everybody you've ever known!!! Grrrr.

Oh my. I actually am praying this girl gets a bfp, just to save her poor ego. :dohh: I mean, now that everyone knows... ??? Didn't her mother ever tell her that it's truly best just not to tell everyone??? I could see this just being so bad for her. So dumb, yet so sad!!



Eternity said:


> Awww :hugs: pinksprinkles!
> If I were you I would put a complaint in about that nurse, how very unprofessional to speak about a patient in that way, especially when said patient is in ear shot!!
> 
> Also keep making a fuss until they fix your ankle!!

I've been fussing about my ankle for over a year now. They really won't do anything until I get back down to 145 (the cut off for normal bmi at my height). It sucks because my favorite exercises (jogging, parkour, figure skating) all put too much strain on my ankles to do. I really miss running!!!


----------



## Eternity

Aww, proper catch22 you're in hun. You can't shift the weight with a busted ankle and they won't fix your ankle til you lose the weight:dohh: how do they suggest you shift it then?


----------



## pinksprinkles

Eternity said:


> Aww, proper catch22 you're in hun. You can't shift the weight with a busted ankle and they won't fix your ankle til you lose the weight:dohh: how do they suggest you shift it then?

They pretty much told me I should crash diet and I told them thank you but no thank you. I'm not going to do more unhealthy things to my body. It seems that every "quick fix" just makes things worse.At one point one of the doctors actually told me he thought I could get away with eating 800 calories a day. (Yeah, like I would actually be able to think/work/study with that little food in my system. Apparently he doesn't understand that human beings actually do need a certain amount of sustenance to survive.)

So I gave up on getting any real advice from doctors and am doing what feels right for me. At this point I am eating a 400-600 calorie a day deficit (so around 1500-1700 calories a day) and that's losing me 4-5 lbs a month. Every 5 pounds I lose I recalculate how many calories my body should be burning in a completely sedentary lifestyle. It will take me another 83 weeks of dieting to get back to my old weight, but I'd rather not put my body through the 6 months of starving that they recommended. 

I tell you though: It is absolutely insane how few calories I get to eat. As a smoker I just naturally burned an extra 400-ish calories a day, and with jogging or parkour every night I could pretty much eat whatever I wanted. Now I'm 83 lbs heavier and I'm having to eat less than I ever did before! It's really weird.


----------



## Eternity

pinksprinkles said:


> Eternity said:
> 
> 
> Ok seriously?! Old friend I vented about previously who announced to the whole world that she was TTC, has now posted a stays on fb declaring how long the wait until the end of the month seems when you're waiting to take a pregnancy test!!
> 
> Omg does she not realise how crappy negative tests make you feel, let alone if you had to share it with everybody you've ever known!!! Grrrr.
> 
> Oh my. I actually am praying this girl gets a bfp, just to save her poor ego. :dohh: I mean, now that everyone knows... ??? Didn't her mother ever tell her that it's truly best just not to tell everyone??? I could see this just being so bad for her. So dumb, yet so sad!!Click to expand...

Yeah, common sense was never really her strong suit.
Personally though I think it would be better to deal with the upset/humiliation of a public bfn than announce a pregnancy at 2-3weeks when any number of things can go wrong and then have to deal with THAT publically.

Just one of many examples though if peeps that 'overshare' on fb.


----------



## pinksprinkles

Eternity said:


> pinksprinkles said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Eternity said:
> 
> 
> Ok seriously?! Old friend I vented about previously who announced to the whole world that she was TTC, has now posted a stays on fb declaring how long the wait until the end of the month seems when you're waiting to take a pregnancy test!!
> 
> Omg does she not realise how crappy negative tests make you feel, let alone if you had to share it with everybody you've ever known!!! Grrrr.
> 
> Oh my. I actually am praying this girl gets a bfp, just to save her poor ego. :dohh: I mean, now that everyone knows... ??? Didn't her mother ever tell her that it's truly best just not to tell everyone??? I could see this just being so bad for her. So dumb, yet so sad!!Click to expand...
> 
> Yeah, common sense was never really her strong suit.
> Personally though I think it would be better to deal with the upset/humiliation of a public bfn than announce a pregnancy at 2-3weeks when any number of things can go wrong and then have to deal with THAT publically.
> 
> Just one of many examples though if peeps that 'overshare' on fb.Click to expand...

Soooo true. I wonder if she gets a BFN this cycle if she'll just keep posting about TTC or if she'll shut the h up.


----------



## pbl_ge

Is this seriously a place to post even the most bitchy things? Because I've got some to say!!!


----------



## J_Lynn

pbl_ge said:


> Is this seriously a place to post even the most bitchy things? Because I've got some to say!!!

Sure is. Fire away.


----------



## pbl_ge

:blush:

Then my vent is that sometimes, as I read this forum, I can't help but think that people who can't write or spell above a 4th grade level should reconsider parenting. I'm such a snob, but seriously!!!!

Okay, back under my rock now. I feel better having said that once. 

:blush:


----------



## sunflower82

i got something to vent as well i hope its the right place i hate two face ppl like seriouslyl my new sis in law is one of them in front of your face she is all sweet but she is seriously argh too much! SHE LIES ALOT! her sister had a miscarriage a few months ago and now she is five months prego and she didnt even tell me! what was i gonna tell the whole world that her sis is prego or she was afraid im gonna tell my parents why would they say anything bad about her sis and her baby! they would just be happy it really pisses me of you know! i feel jelous in way as well as i want a baby so bad! but i am really happy for my sis in law's sis that she is prego


----------



## hunni12

You ladies have made me realize something..I should really watch what I say on fb about my pregnancy and always talking about it because there could be someone in my thousands of friends who is feeling the same way you ladies and is probably ttc and here I am bragging on and on. I thank you ladies


----------



## GabesMommy

I am mad at my body for not cooperating. I'm sick of not fitting into the "norm" that I was told to expect after I had my miracle baby (16 months PP and 4 months since I weaned and still no Post Baby AF)! Sick of people thinking my struggles are over because I managed to get pregnant and have a healthy son (after 7 years NTNP!) so "my body must know what to do"!

Meanwhile I've gained so much weight with the preg/nursing and since that I think it's the reason I'm not ovulating! I just turned 29 and I DO feel my clock is ticking! 

I get depressed to think that my son will be an only child. I've always wanted two kids, maybe three if God sees fit. What "test" am I going through to have this happen? Am I being punished? Why does my SIL, who's a horrible witch, btw, get to have NO troubles, be a year younger than me and have 4 kids already (and just tells me she had an early MC while her daughter is not yet five months old- and I feel horrible for having some satisfaction in her MC- I KNOW, I'M HORRIBLE- because that means I know that at least she's had a FRACTION of the struggles I've had on my journey to becoming a mother.

Side rant:
Speaking of, why is it that in TTC that the more time you have under your belt suddenly the more DESERVING of a BFP you become? Why should we begrudge these "fertile myrtles" their babies? Because they didn't have to try hard for it? They still TTC, they just got lucky and it happened quick! We shouldn't make these ladies FEEL GUILTY for being blessed with a miracle!!! It's like they get Survivor's Guilt, because they know how gutted it will make us feel when we find out about their success! 

We're putting ourselves in an impossible situation- damned if you do, damned if you don't (get pregnant)


I hate that I don't know what's going on in my body- why aren't you having a period? Do I need to jumpstart you with Provera? Will that confuse you even more? How do I know what the right thing to do is? Why do *I* have to have PCOS, why? why?


WHY?


----------



## Eternity

Argh, same stupid friend on fb - the one who overshares - after announcing early yesterday that she is waiting to take a hpt at the end of the month, then posted last night that she was "out on the piss" and judging by the later statuses about how lucky she was and how much she loves her family she really did have a lot to drink!

Seriously dude, wtf???!!!


----------



## MeeShell

Hunni12 and GabesMommy, I don't know about you guys, but I don't think most women that are TTC just get mad or feel that the women around them who get pregnant aren't deserving of being pregnant, I know I sure don't. When my best friend from high school (who I'm not that close with now, as we don't live in the same state) found out that she was pregnant I was happy for her, honestly. I know that even though she may not have been trying and it just happened for her, she would not take having a child for granted. THAT is what upsets me about many of the women around me that can pop out babies left and right, they take things such as creating a human being for granted. How is that possible? Even if I hadn't had such a long road in TTC and it just happened from the get go I would still cherish and appreciate everything about getting pregnant. With my DD (who is almost 6) I was having irregular periods and she surprisingly happened after a year or so of NTNP, and I never thought I could have children..but the second I found out I was pregnant I quit smoking, didn't drink, and loved every single minute of pregnancy. THAT is what it should be about, not you endangering your child's life because you can quit a silly habit, or continuing to be irresponsible and having children you know for a fact you cannot provide 100% for. 
So in the end, it isn't as though we (or mostly I) feel that fertile myrtles should feel, or are in any way underserving..but if you just so happen to be irresponsible and ungrateful about such a miracle then yes..I feel that they are absolutely undeserving. 

Hunni12- I don't think you should feel bad about posting things about your pregnancy on fb. I don't know you, but I doubt you have the qualities of the irresponsible parent (or soon to be) that I mentioned above. So celebrate your gift however you'd like, I think you deserve it. & congrats btw : )


----------



## GabesMommy

MeeShell said:


> Hunni12 and GabesMommy, I don't know about you guys, but I don't think most women that are TTC just get mad or feel that the women around them who get pregnant aren't deserving of being pregnant, I know I sure don't. When my best friend from high school (who I'm not that close with now, as we don't live in the same state) found out that she was pregnant I was happy for her, honestly. I know that even though she may not have been trying and it just happened for her, she would not take having a child for granted. THAT is what upsets me about many of the women around me that can pop out babies left and right, they take things such as creating a human being for granted. How is that possible? Even if I hadn't had such a long road in TTC and it just happened from the get go I would still cherish and appreciate everything about getting pregnant. With my DD (who is almost 6) I was having irregular periods and she surprisingly happened after a year or so of NTNP, and I never thought I could have children..but the second I found out I was pregnant I quit smoking, didn't drink, and loved every single minute of pregnancy. THAT is what it should be about, not you endangering your child's life because you can quit a silly habit, or continuing to be irresponsible and having children you know for a fact you cannot provide 100% for.
> So in the end, it isn't as though we (or mostly I) feel that fertile myrtles should feel, or are in any way underserving..but if you just so happen to be irresponsible and ungrateful about such a miracle then yes..I feel that they are absolutely undeserving.
> 
> Hunni12- I don't think you should feel bad about posting things about your pregnancy on fb. I don't know you, but I doubt you have the qualities of the irresponsible parent (or soon to be) that I mentioned above. So celebrate your gift however you'd like, I think you deserve it. & congrats btw : )

Trust me, I know what you mean....I hope you don't feel I was speaking for you when I posted- I was trying to analyze why I felt such judgemental feelings towards those fertile myrtles and was speaking out loud...

It kind of is a slap in the face (regardless of another person's behaviors/fitness for parenting) every time someone gets pregnant who DOESN'T want the baby. Especially though it hurts if they are doing bad things that parents shouldn't do....I KNOW what you mean about the FB friend- I think I would have a hard time keeping my mouth shut!


----------



## MeeShell

GabesMommy said:


> MeeShell said:
> 
> 
> Hunni12 and GabesMommy, I don't know about you guys, but I don't think most women that are TTC just get mad or feel that the women around them who get pregnant aren't deserving of being pregnant, I know I sure don't. When my best friend from high school (who I'm not that close with now, as we don't live in the same state) found out that she was pregnant I was happy for her, honestly. I know that even though she may not have been trying and it just happened for her, she would not take having a child for granted. THAT is what upsets me about many of the women around me that can pop out babies left and right, they take things such as creating a human being for granted. How is that possible? Even if I hadn't had such a long road in TTC and it just happened from the get go I would still cherish and appreciate everything about getting pregnant. With my DD (who is almost 6) I was having irregular periods and she surprisingly happened after a year or so of NTNP, and I never thought I could have children..but the second I found out I was pregnant I quit smoking, didn't drink, and loved every single minute of pregnancy. THAT is what it should be about, not you endangering your child's life because you can quit a silly habit, or continuing to be irresponsible and having children you know for a fact you cannot provide 100% for.
> So in the end, it isn't as though we (or mostly I) feel that fertile myrtles should feel, or are in any way underserving..but if you just so happen to be irresponsible and ungrateful about such a miracle then yes..I feel that they are absolutely undeserving.
> 
> Hunni12- I don't think you should feel bad about posting things about your pregnancy on fb. I don't know you, but I doubt you have the qualities of the irresponsible parent (or soon to be) that I mentioned above. So celebrate your gift however you'd like, I think you deserve it. & congrats btw : )
> 
> Trust me, I know what you mean....I hope you don't feel I was speaking for you when I posted- I was trying to analyze why I felt such judgemental feelings towards those fertile myrtles and was speaking out loud...
> 
> It kind of is a slap in the face (regardless of another person's behaviors/fitness for parenting) every time someone gets pregnant who DOESN'T want the baby. Especially though it hurts if they are doing bad things that parents shouldn't do....I KNOW what you mean about the FB friend- I think I would have a hard time keeping my mouth shut!Click to expand...

Oh no, I didn't take your post as if you were speaking for me, when I initially read it I kind of thought that you thought I was saying that in my original post  But no, I know exactly what you mean when you say it's a slap in the face when women get pregnant who don't really want to have a baby. & I had a glass of wine the other night (I'm not going to lie, some wine every now and then keeps me sane, even though I know I probably shouldn't..but it's not like I was pregnant or anything, lol) and I was half tempted to post an image of what smoking can do to an unborn child to be spiteful mostly..but also to prove a point. Especially when the conversation I read went EXACTLY like this:

Pregnant friend: Man, what to eat. Been sick all day.
Her friend: Aw..that sucks.
Pregnant friend: I know this damn baby dont like nothin. Even cigarettes make me sick.
Her friend: Whaat? Your baby is a buzz kill.
Pregnant friend: Ur tellin me.

And I know that some of you are thinking "Well maybe they're just joking around." No...they are literally just that moronic...yet people like this are able to reproduce? Something just isn't right.


----------



## rihanna

I just want it to be my turn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11months has past and in that time my best friend has gotten pg with #2 and has her. I love her so much and the wee baby girl but it is killing me.........

Also my 30-42 cycles have gotten even stranger im CD 46 and no idea whats going on.


AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


----------



## hunni12

@Meeshell: Thank you. It just opened my eyes to see how these ladies feel. I love my pregnancy even through the throwing up and worries haha. I honestly felt guilt because I got pregnant my 3rd month of trying. But me and my OH have been together for 4 years with this being our first. I thought I couldn't have kids neither and so this baby was a blessing to us and a huge eye opener. I root for these ladies hoping they too can share this feeling. Oh and I too had irregular cycles, their quite the hassle:dohh:


----------



## Quindalyn

All you had to do was make time to have sex with me and you didn't even do that! YES I'm disappointed in you.


----------



## ladyzealand

Love this thread on being able to say what you want!, My partner & I are blessed with one but have been trying for roughly 2 years for another! My close friend is pregnant and DID NOT EVEN WANT TO BE! It just happened and she always complains about not being able to do things because she is preggo! & here i am sitting here wanting to slap her!! because i WOULD LOVE to give up everything "fun" (to her) to be pregnant!!!, & also my freaking mother! Maybe if you lost abit of weight if might be easier) LOOK MUM I WAS THIS SIZE WHEN I GOT PREGGO AND THERE ARE ALOT OF PEOPLE BIGGER THEN ME THAT GET PREGGO! (im 5'8, 170lbs) roughly), also my Nan, "are you sure your not already pregnant" LOOK LADY! IF I WAS PREGGO I WOULDNT BE SULKING EVERY DAM MONTH!, oh that feels so so so so so GOOOOD!!


----------



## tsyhanochka

ladyzealand said:


> Maybe if you lost abit of weight if might be easier) LOOK MUM I WAS THIS SIZE WHEN I GOT PREGGO AND THERE ARE ALOT OF PEOPLE BIGGER THEN ME THAT GET PREGGO! (im 5'8, 170lbs) roughly

Seriously? I am same height and 180 and my dr didn't mention it when I went for my physical and had been trying for 5 months then. She said I am healthy and that's what matters. 

And I agree I have seen some heavy ladies get preggo super easily so I am not concerned on that front.

Stay strong girl!


----------



## Eternity

Back again, I seriously LOVE this thread!!!

Ok, we live in a small town and we have one of *those* families, you know the type....
Scruffy, loads of kids, neither parent works, live off benefits, moan that the house they are GIVEN to live in isn't big enough.... Most places have at least one of *those* families!

Well found out yesterday that she is expecting baby number 10!!!!

Seriously!!! 10!!!

In all honesty it's actually her twelth but the first two were with a previous partner and were taken into care. He also has about six from a previous relationship but they don't live here.

But yep, baby number 10, how is that fair?!
Once those poor kids reach a year old she loses interest in them and has another baby. 
The kids are always grubby and full of nits.
Apparently their dad would love to work but he does everything at home, the cooking cleaning looking after the kids, all she does is sit around SMOKING and playing around on fb!

We put off properly trying for #2, until we were in a better position.

Argh!!!!! It's just so unfair!!!!!!

Although I do think it would be cheaper for the council to have Sky installed for them to give them something else to do a night ! Lol


----------



## GabesMommy

Eternity said:


> Back again, I seriously LOVE this thread!!!
> 
> Ok, we live in a small town and we have one of *those* families, you know the type....
> Scruffy, loads of kids, neither parent works, live off benefits, moan that the house they are GIVEN to live in isn't big enough.... Most places have at least one of *those* families!
> 
> Well found out yesterday that she is expecting baby number 10!!!!
> 
> Seriously!!! 10!!!
> 
> In all honesty it's actually her twelth but the first two were with a previous partner and were taken into care. He also has about six from a previous relationship but they don't live here.
> 
> But yep, baby number 10, how is that fair?!
> Once those poor kids reach a year old she loses interest in them and has another baby.
> The kids are always grubby and full of nits.
> Apparently their dad would love to work but he does everything at home, the cooking cleaning looking after the kids, all she does is sit around SMOKING and playing around on fb!
> 
> We put off properly trying for #2, until we were in a better position.
> 
> Argh!!!!! It's just so unfair!!!!!!
> 
> Although I do think it would be cheaper for the council to have Sky installed for them to give them something else to do a night ! Lol

WOW. All I can say is WOW.

You'd think they'd be throwing birth control at her! :wacko:

I have nothing against large families, nor do I think one has to be in "proper financial shape" to have one (since that is such a subjective term) but no matter how wealthy someone gets- if you can't CARE for your kids- don't have them!

I would NEVER let my kid run around dirty and neglected! I was at a gas station, soon after I had my son, and in walked this lady with a handful of dirty kids. There was a toddler with her, probably about 2 years old, and she was covered in dirt and grime, hair dirty and uncombed, wearing only a diaper (yes, BARE feet in a dirty gas station) which was so soiled it hung to her KNEES!! I was SO angry when I saw that- I literally had to leave to store to keep my own mouth shut from chewing this mom out! (My common sense told me to not say anything- since I generally find the mothers who "care" for their children in that way tend to be pretty trashy themselves and would have no qualms going to jail for stabbing a "nosy bitch" like me, if ya know what I mean)

I literally almost CRIED for this poor girl.

I don't get it. I don't think I can keep my mouth shut next time. It's just too much. I think that's my sorest of sore spots- neglected children!


----------



## J_Lynn

My fb status:
"Well, I guess tonight is a chocolate chip cooking type of night. The girls and hubby will enjoy tonight and fresh cinnamon rolls for breakfast :)"

First fn comment from my pregnant friend who I have asked at least 150 times to STOP commenting on my fn fb about her pregnancy because I already have her blocked from my newsfeed:

"Umm.... Myself and baby would love leftovers, I'm so hungry this whole pregnancy!! I can't believe I still have 10 weeks left!!"

In my head, I screamed and said so many rude things to her. I'm just going to have to block her from being able to see my updates. That bitch :/


----------



## eghhelp

I hate gp's and i hate the depo perova shot!!


----------



## tsyhanochka

My vent. People who know what we go through after being on these forums long enough and still post about the magic of not trying! Seriously... trying to not think about it is what I have been doing for 8 cycles. Grrrrrr


----------



## kassiaethne

My sister in law ans brother in law now have a kid each....now my husband and i are being looked at all when you two gunna start....god damnit been starting but had a couple miscarriages...not like i dont want its cant yet stop giving me the look and lecture. 


And if i find one more bitch comming to show me her accidental love child and how hard it is and how they are going to get by.....im going to punch them in their faces. 

Omg especially teen moms who think omg cant wait its going to be my personal doll and we are going to play and frollic and be haappy fooorever....4 months into it omg its so hard why is my baby daddy so shitty i didnt know it would be this hard... Makes me wanna slap a hoe

*takes a breath*


----------



## PleaseLouise

I'm so, so, SO angry today! My blood is boiling! I'm so glad I saw this thread! 

I'm 34, been TTC with hubby for 4 1/2 years in total. My workmate is 25, been with her bf 5 months and fell pregnant. Fair enough - these things happen. She waltzes into work today and announce she's having TRIPLETS!!! Then 'confides' in me that she ordered clomid off the Internet and was taking it without her bf even knowing she wanted ONE baby! 

Yes, that is the same Clomid I've spent years trying to get from my GP. Christ, I've NEVER been this angry. It's so unfair! I to,d my boss I was sick and came to wok from home. I just can't sit next to that woman today.


----------



## PleaseLouise

Just to add - she had no fertility issues just 'wanted twins'!


----------



## tamithomas

I wish we could just go into hybernation during the TWW.. so tired of hearing people sneeze and getting pregnant. Not to mention, MOM STOP CALLING MY STEP BROTHERS SON YOUR GRANDSON! I'm an only child and it digs a serious hole in my heart everytime she says to people she's a grandma. TTC for 3 years!


----------



## laurac1988

Eurgh PleaseLouise I HATE people like that! Don't order PRESCRIPTION drugs from the internet. They're called PRESCRIPTION for a reason! 

My rant? Went to dr today (about fertility) and the waiting room was FULL of toddlers. Don't really mind about that, but what I do mind is when they're running riot and the parents are shouting into their mobile phones and not paying their kid any attention. Made me so upset.


----------



## tamithomas

PleaseLouise said:


> I'm so, so, SO angry today! My blood is boiling! I'm so glad I saw this thread!
> 
> I'm 34, been TTC with hubby for 4 1/2 years in total. My workmate is 25, been with her bf 5 months and fell pregnant. Fair enough - these things happen. She waltzes into work today and announce she's having TRIPLETS!!! Then 'confides' in me that she ordered clomid off the Internet and was taking it without her bf even knowing she wanted ONE baby!
> 
> Yes, that is the same Clomid I've spent years trying to get from my GP. Christ, I've NEVER been this angry. It's so unfair! I to,d my boss I was sick and came to wok from home. I just can't sit next to that woman today.

You are not alone. My Step brothers girlfriend stopped taking her BC without him knowing to purposely get pregnant weither he liked it or not. They were still living at my mom and his dads at the time, only one had a part time job, she didn't. i was so mad when i foudn out i think i cried myself to sleep. If I were a drinker, which I'm not, I would have drank the 40oz of southern comfort my DH keeps in the house for cooking purposes only.


----------



## CaliDreaming

PleaseLouise said:


> I'm so, so, SO angry today! My blood is boiling! I'm so glad I saw this thread!
> 
> I'm 34, been TTC with hubby for 4 1/2 years in total. My workmate is 25, been with her bf 5 months and fell pregnant. Fair enough - these things happen. She waltzes into work today and announce she's having TRIPLETS!!! Then 'confides' in me that she ordered clomid off the Internet and was taking it without her bf even knowing she wanted ONE baby!
> 
> Yes, that is the same Clomid I've spent years trying to get from my GP. Christ, I've NEVER been this angry. It's so unfair! I to,d my boss I was sick and came to wok from home. I just can't sit next to that woman today.

 :shock: I hate to see how this woman is doing a year from now. Those poor babies!! What an idiot. Has she told her bf yet?? I'd love to be a fly on the wall when that convo takes places, lol.


----------



## tamithomas

Officially stalking! these types of threads I love to bits :)


----------



## PleaseLouise

Apparently he's 'over the moon'. Which makes it all ok in her eyes! I know it's none of my business and I know that being annoyed doesn't change things but WHY is it always this type of idiot who 'doesn't need to try'?! I've never been bitter about my fertility issues before but it all got too much for me today xx


----------



## PleaseLouise

Don't mean to say everyone who falls pregnant easily is an idiot...


----------



## tamithomas

PleaseLouise said:


> Apparently he's 'over the moon'. Which makes it all ok in her eyes! I know it's none of my business and I know that being annoyed doesn't change things but WHY is it always this type of idiot who 'doesn't need to try'?! I've never been bitter about my fertility issues before but it all got too much for me today xx

totally get what you mean, my DH and I had just had a 3 hour pillow talk about that yesterday how it's not fair that all of our idiot 18 year old friends barely just got out of high school, ink is still fresh on their first apartment papers signed and they fall preggo. Meanwhile we had a home fully paid off, a perfect marriage, my hubby is an amazing cook and has even made a recipe specifically meant to disguise veggies to make sure he or she will get their portion of veggies without even knowing it ect. It's so backwards!

I love my dog and cat but I don't wanna live my life just being an animal caretaker


----------



## kassiaethne

currently I am in Brazil visiting my in laws. today we had to go to the bank to once again argue about why they sent his...oh well not the point lol thats a whole rant in itself

so on our way home I see a not even probably 2 year old tiny child standing in front of one of the busiest streets in rio de janerio alone. like hes about to step out. I lean over to my husband and ask "I wonder who the mother is..." then all of a sudden I hear an old lady yelling in portuguese "OMG WOMAN GET YOUR CHILD, WHAT THE F IS WRONG WITH YOU YOU CRACK WHORE TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILD!!!! WHO LEAVES THEIR BABY OUT THERE BY THE STREET YOU SHOULD BE BEATEN TO DEATH!!!!!"

so the obviously on something homeless woman gets the childs attention....it turns around and starts begging the old lady and her flock of awesome old lady friends for money like an automatic robot.....

sooo the lady just sends the little 2 year old out into the busy street to beg for money so her lazy butt doesn't have to do anything but sit and do more drugs....

It just hurts me right in the uterus....to know THAT THING got to have that cute adorable child...but me who was taking care of my body has had 2 miscarriages.....where is the justice!!!!!!

on the other note this has reenforced my wanting to adopt my second child....


----------



## AlyCon

So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??


----------



## ladyzealand

Exactly my point!!!!
I defo am trying!!!!
You stay strong too!

Lots of love a baby dust!!!
Praying for our BFP!!!


----------



## ladyzealand

I do agree with you in what your saying. In New Zealand there is a high statistic of teen mothers and most teens are more inclined to stay on the benefit and have a second-third child. But in saying that, if the mother was brought up in the right enviroment and with the right education and support they can be great mothers, i was a teen mother had my son when i was 17, I am now married to the father, we are in our twenties, own our own home and currently own a renewable energy company. We are great parents, and are trying for a second! unfortunatly to no luck. I believe teen or not, everyone is couple of being a great or poor parent. I mean some of these people are STUPID think that it doesnt harm there baby by smoking around it!!! Drives me nuts i just want to take the babies and RUN!!


----------



## divineparadis

I really wish for myself not to get jealous and upset when I see my pregnant friends and friends who just had a baby. It is very overwhelming.

I also have this love-hate relationship with the "I didn't know I was pregnant" show on Discovery Home & Health. Drives me nuts when I see someone on TV getting pregnant and having a baby without knowing and here I am trying to conceive for 6 months without any success.

And also my colleague in the office who is 8 years my senior is trying to conceive her 2nd baby, added competition and stress!

I need to get a grip!!


----------



## hunni12

AlyCon said:


> So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??

I'm sorry. I know you're venting and all but I am frequent poster in the TP section and I kinda find this offensive. I'm sorry you feel the way you do,but we still have feelings..


----------



## kassiaethne

hunni12 said:


> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??
> 
> I'm sorry. I know you're venting and all but I am frequent poster in the TP section and I kinda find this offensive. I'm sorry you feel the way you do,but we still have feelings..Click to expand...

I dont see where she was being offencive. Shes just saying the points that frustrate her and alot of people. Shes just saying it is more ideal to be stable and ready to have a child rather then not.

And i cant blame her for being jealous and frustrated when you go though all the waiting and getting your ab and your c's just arent falling into place. While others who havent gone though the waiting, prepairing, getting your life ready first, just oops I'm pregnant looky that. 

Honestly none of this is ment to offend, its ment to get those things you cant say like, im jealous that my sister in law didnt misscarry and i did, its not fair...no i dont really wish she miscarried....i just feel cheated and dont understand what made her better then me in the cosmos. Cant help how i feel, amd you shouldnt try to shame a person for trying to get it out of their system. These arnt personal jabs at ppl, they are things eating us inside


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## ashybug

Oh you know when people start pestering about you having babies 3 months after getting married...
and when you finally decide it's time, you discover you have TERRIBLE cycles off of birth control, including excruciating cramps, vomiting, and CYSTS! I have PCOS. 
SHUTTUP family. We're working on it. We don't want you to know, because we know your pestering will get a kazillion times worse. I don't want to be asked if I'm pregnant every month...not that you don't do that already...
I just want a normal cycle (even with terrible pms, bring it on!) as long as I start ovulating.... I would be oh so happy!
All those people (like my brother's teenager friends) who get pregnant on accident make me so angry...
We haven't been ttc for very long. But I know it's going to be a very long road ahead of us...it explains why I never got pregnant before getting married when I didn't use any birth control in high school (yeah I was an ignorant little bitch haha).


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## Eternity

AlyCon said:


> So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??

I know this is a place where you are free to rant and get everything off of your chest, but please try not to generalise so much. Not all teen mums are like that, maybe most of those on the teen boards here are, but bear in mind that some of them may read this thread!

I'm now 27 and trying for baby number two with my husband. We have our own house, hubby works full time, I work part time and am studying from home, we have been married for nearly six years - nice and stable, but I'm not even sure I'm properly ovulating and have always had irregular cycles, and now know that nothing makes sense in my cycles.

BUT
When I was 17 I had an (to use your word) "oopsie", I wasn't in a serious relationship, I still lived with my parents, I had already left school and was working but the situation wasn't ideal. But everything I did after that has been for my beloved daughter! I coped, in fact I think I'm a good mum judging by how my DD is turning out, polite, kind, smart, helpful.

I may not have a career but I wouldn't change my family for anything and I'm bloody glad I had her when I did so I didn't have to go through all this stress the first time around.


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## tamithomas

Honestly I can see both sides. I can see why some are getting offended by AlyCon's comment and I can also see her side as well. I mean, yes not all teen moms are uneducated girls who know nothing about pregnancy and end up with that joy for no reason except being stupid. Some actually take it into their own hands to change their life to make sure their babies life will be good, i know a few..heck a girl i know who was a TP now has an even better life then me income wise and all and she did it all by herself lol.

But at the same time, I see her side because well..here we are, trying and trying and then we see kids having kids which no matter how good they make it for their babies, it's still not supposed to be encouraged which sadly these days with 16 and pregnant it is. At the end of the day, those getting offended by her post..this is a venting post and we should try and not get offended by others posts because if we start getting offended by others, it's gonna not feel so open when it comes to saying what's on our minds. :hugs: to all!

my vent on the day: DH pulled a muscle during our last session of BD which luckily was on my last day of O but dang it I'm really sexually frustrated lol. Yes I masterbate but it's just not the same :blush:


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## laurac1988

SMOKERS!!! I'm getting so pissed off with vile, disgusting smokers! I saw a lady earlier who was heavily (REALLY heavily) pregnant, looked like she'd been dragged through a hedge and was puffing away on cigarette after cigarette. INFURIATED!!!


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## zoomlentil

laurac1988 said:


> SMOKERS!!! I'm getting so pissed off with vile, disgusting smokers! I saw a lady earlier who was heavily (REALLY heavily) pregnant, looked like she'd been dragged through a hedge and was puffing away on cigarette after cigarette. INFURIATED!!!

Tell me about it.. I know someone who does this and it drives me mental. Talk about selfish. I have no sympathy for them at all as my mother was a heavy smoker until she found out that I was on the way - then she quit cold turkey and hasn't smoked a cigarette since. It was immensely hard for her, but she did it for me.


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## laurac1988

that's the way it should be. My mum smoked when she was pregnant with me and my sisters. All three of us have asthma, my middle sister has bipolar and we all also have PCOS.

Pissed at my mum.


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## PleaseLouise

On the whole 'teen mum' side, i disagree that most will end up in bad situations. My sister had her baby at 17 and is married, happily to my niece's father (12 years later). More to the point, my aunt was 13 when she had my cousin, she is still married to the father, they had 2 more children together, own houses in 4 different countries and are more respectable than anyone I know. My cousin is now 29, a lawyer and married with her own 2 children.

I understand where the frustration comes in and I really doubt AlyCon wanted to offend anyone. It's all about the 'why'. It's very hard to swallow when you're listening to people who, often don't want to be a parent, complaining about their situation when we would give anything to be there. 

It's easy to get riled on forums (especially when many of us are crazy hormonal!), it's not worth anyone being upset over xx


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## AlyCon

I wasnt trying to generalize all teen moms! I know there are teen moms who turn out just fine or even very successful- cuz my mom is an example of that! She had my sister in high school and had three more kids by three more different men by the time she was 23 (i was the last and she and my dad were married,then divorced)! But now at 43, you would never know that she went through that! I wasnt putting anybody down, and i guess you missed a few key words in my post like *many (not all)*, and *more likely (not 100% going to happen)* or how about the multiple times i said i feel BAD about being judgemental and that if it werent for PCOS i would have been a teem mom too! But i would have gotten married anyway and he probably would have joined the army even sooner and we would still be living the same exact life we do now just with a baby (which is what im trying to make happen now to no avail)! So i completely understand. But the bottom line is that teen moms do have a disadvantage! some rise above it, others drown in it, and their babies suffer! But you cant argue with statistics! I'm not going to start throwing out percentages but we all know that what i said has truth to it. Maybe not for all teen moms, but definitely for the majority of them, especially in the beginning. If all teen moms ended up with a perfect life, it wouldnt even be an issue. And BTW this is a VENT thread! The whole point of me posting here was 1- its less likely that teen moms will be on this forum, and 2- i THOUGHT i could vent here WITHOUT judgement as thats the purpose of this thread. Theres something seriously wrong here if we can post here insulting our CLOSE FRIENDS AND FAMILY, but not make statements about the FACTS of teen pregnancy. Damn, you act like i posted that ON the teen pregnancy forum! Now that would have been rude and mean, and i would deserve to be hassled for it. But my vent is MY VENT! If you dont like it, keep scrolling!!!:growlmad:


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## CaliDreaming

I remember reading a vent about a younger woman who was frustrated because an much older family member in her 40's conceived on accident while she was struggling. I am in my late 30's as well, but I still was able to read it and understand why the young lady was so frustrated by the news. I didn't read it as a personal attack, or that the young woman was saying that some women are too old to be having babies, but that she was expressing a moment of frustration at the irony of the situation.

All of this to say that I hope this thread stays a place where we can vent away our frustrations, because so much of what we go through we have to keep inside. I think we have to keep in mind that every post in this thread is offensive to someone. TTC is hell and I think we desperately need a place where we can let these emotions out even when they aren't pretty. We all need to support each other because young, old, rich, or poor, when it comes to TTC we are all in the same boat.


----------



## zoomlentil

laurac1988 said:


> that's the way it should be. My mum smoked when she was pregnant with me and my sisters. All three of us have asthma, my middle sister has bipolar and we all also have PCOS.
> 
> Pissed at my mum.

Wow, I'm sorry to hear all that. :(

From memory my mum smoked throughout her pregnancy with my sister (in 1970 when smoking health risks were not widely known) and she has very bad asthma.


----------



## Babybbumbleb

AlyCon said:


> So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??

I understand how your feeling and all but you really don't need to say things like this. My boyfriend and I are 18, and we tried for our baby, I had a MC 3 months earlier before getting pregnant now.. Yes I agree that. A lot of girls in teens won't have their baby daddy's or no support or anything. But don't forget that there are some of us who do and who ARE stable and tried for our baby. No baby is a "oopsie" anyways! Maybe the baby wasn't planned, that is what you should of said. I understand your venting because your mad you haven't fell pregnant and you see young girls who are, or everyone around you, I understand how you are feeling. You aren't even a year older then me so dont try to act like you are high and mighty because you are married and have your shit together. Because although me and my OH aren't married, we have our life together. He makes 18$ a hour working in construction and I am going to school to become a nurse.. So there you go.. What you said was hurtful and you should of said your words differently and thought before you spoke out about something. Becaus as you said, you coul of had a unplanned child with your husband because you guys never used protection. So you could of became one of those girls in your high school. Remember that.


----------



## PleaseLouise

Just to clarify, I wasn't trying to get at you for your vent AlyCon, I was just trying to play devils advocate. I really do see your point and understand your frustrations, as I'm sure most do. It's difficult to understand how much of your life is affected by TTC until you've been in this position. Hell, I've had my days where I could happily have fallen out with friends and family over pregnancy and baby related issues. 

We all really need this thread so let's keep it going as it was :flower:

Which brings me to today's vent/ confession... I've been sick to the back teeth of hearing my best friend complain of morning sickness (if I had a baby for every time I said "I'd give anything to have ms"!). Anyway, today I got a phone call from her husband saying she's been admitted to hospital with hyperemesis and is dangerously dehydrated :nope: I guess that's another 'have to go through it to appreciate it'. I feel awful, HATE the emotions that come with TTC - suddenly everyone is an enemy!


----------



## AlyCon

Babybbumbleb said:


> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??
> 
> I understand how your feeling and all but you really don't need to say things like this. My boyfriend and I are 18, and we tried for our baby, I had a MC 3 months earlier before getting pregnant now.. Yes I agree that. A lot of girls in teens won't have their baby daddy's or no support or anything. But don't forget that there are some of us who do and who ARE stable and tried for our baby. No baby is a "oopsie" anyways! Maybe the baby wasn't planned, that is what you should of said. I understand your venting because your mad you haven't fell pregnant and you see young girls who are, or everyone around you, I understand how you are feeling. You aren't even a year older then me so dont try to act like you are high and mighty because you are married and have your shit together. Because although me and my OH aren't married, we have our life together. He makes 18$ a hour working in construction and I am going to school to become a nurse.. So there you go.. What you said was hurtful and you should of said your words differently and thought before you spoke out about something. Becaus as you said, you coul of had a unplanned child with your husband because you guys never used protection. So you could of became one of those girls in your high school. Remember that.Click to expand...

First of all, LEARN TO READ! Cuz if you did you would see that i said i could have been a teen mom, and on some level i kind of wish i had been if it wouldve saved me the trouble im having now! It may seem like im the close minded one but really its you because apparently you chose to focus on the two sentences about the struggles of teen moms and ignore the parts where i said i feel bad and even jealous! And you would also have been able to see that i've made another post since then where i've elaborated on what meant by the things i said. So im not going to repeat all that to you! like i said LEARN TO READ and have your facts straight before attacking some one for having an opinion different from yours. I never personally attacked you in my post yet you seem to think its fair to personally attack me?? I DONT THINK SO. If you know you have your shit together then dont worry about what i said! It obviously doesnt refer to you since you're an adult and (im assuming) out of high school. You're not even in the demographic i'm talking about! So quick to jump down my throat when i wasnt even referring to you! And dont tell me what i "should've said" I SAID EXACTLY WHAT THE HELL I WANTED TO SAY AND MEANT EVERY WORD OF IT! And unlike you, i never personally attcked anybody! i maturely chose to post my opinion on a VENTING THREAD where i THOUGHT i could say anything without the judgement of closed minded people like you! We may be less than a year a part in age but you obviously still have a lot of growing up to do!


----------



## Babybbumbleb

AlyCon said:


> Babybbumbleb said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??
> 
> I understand how your feeling and all but you really don't need to say things like this. My boyfriend and I are 18, and we tried for our baby, I had a MC 3 months earlier before getting pregnant now.. Yes I agree that. A lot of girls in teens won't have their baby daddy's or no support or anything. But don't forget that there are some of us who do and who ARE stable and tried for our baby. No baby is a "oopsie" anyways! Maybe the baby wasn't planned, that is what you should of said. I understand your venting because your mad you haven't fell pregnant and you see young girls who are, or everyone around you, I understand how you are feeling. You aren't even a year older then me so dont try to act like you are high and mighty because you are married and have your shit together. Because although me and my OH aren't married, we have our life together. He makes 18$ a hour working in construction and I am going to school to become a nurse.. So there you go.. What you said was hurtful and you should of said your words differently and thought before you spoke out about something. Becaus as you said, you coul of had a unplanned child with your husband because you guys never used protection. So you could of became one of those girls in your high school. Remember that.Click to expand...
> 
> First of all, LEARN TO READ! Cuz if you did you would see that i said i could have been a teen mom, and on some level i kind of wish i had been if it wouldve saved me the trouble im having now! It may seem like im the close minded one but really its you because apparently you chose to focus on the two sentences about the struggles of teen moms and ignore the parts where i said i feel bad and even jealous! And you would also have been able to see that i've made another post since then where i've elaborated on what meant by the things i said. So im not going to repeat all that to you! like i said LEARN TO READ and have your facts straight before attacking some one for having an opinion different from yours. I never personally attacked you in my post yet you seem to think its fair to personally attack me?? I DONT THINK SO. If you know you have your shit together then dont worry about what i said! It obviously doesnt refer to you since you're an adult and (im assuming) out of high school. You're not even in the demographic i'm talking about! So quick to jump down my throat when i wasnt even referring to you! And dont tell me what i "should've said" I SAID EXACTLY WHAT THE HELL I WANTED TO SAY AND MEANT EVERY WORD OF IT! And unlike you, i never personally attcked anybody! i maturely chose to post my opinion on a VENTING THREAD where i THOUGHT i could say anything without the judgement of closed minded people like you! We may be less than a year a part in age but you obviously still have a lot of growing up to do!Click to expand...

REAL MATURE... I could be a total bitch and say things that should be said, but I don't want to get this thread closed to other women who need it. Hope you get your LO soon and I wish nothing but the best for you hun


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## AlyCon

Whatever helps you sleep at night, hun. Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy, and i hope your baby is happy and healthy.


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## hunni12

I'm sorry aly but you're out of line. My mom was a single parent to 4 having most in her teen years. No our father's wasn't there but I believe I turned out fine ..as stated before I'm sorry u haven't gotten your bfp yet but somethings should not be said. And yes I have gotten bashed on here because I made a rant so people do do it. I tried for 3 months so I do know the pain of seeing negatives. I do lurk here because I still try to help ladies ttc. No my life isn't easy but I work my ass to provide for my LO.. it's tough. Good luck to you.


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## CdnEquestrian

hunni12 said:


> I'm sorry aly but you're out of line. My mom was a single parent to 4 having most in her teen years. No our father's wasn't there but I believe I turned out fine ..as stated before I'm sorry u haven't gotten your bfp yet *but somethings should not be said.* And yes I have gotten bashed on here because I made a rant so people do do it. I tried for 3 months so I do know the pain of seeing negatives. I do lurk here because I still try to help ladies ttc. No my life isn't easy but I work my ass to provide for my LO.. it's tough. Good luck to you.

Correct me if i'm wrong.....but isn't that the whole POINT of this thread? Things that we're thinking/feeling that you can't/shouldn't actually say???


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## laurac1988

Ladies... Can't we just take each post as a rant?


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## kassiaethne

my today vent....dentists....who say you don't have any cavities then go do a teeth cleaning and find one....yes I know its my fault for not flossing and its not like it just magically appeared...but she took my happy moment away *cries*

and please anyone who is a dentist don't get your feelings hurt that I am miffed about this. I know its irrational and not your personal fault I have a cavity or the other dentist didn't notice it right away, its just how I feel and its totally crazy I know this....:thumbup:


----------



## tsyhanochka

Lots of things shouldn't be said but this is why this thread was started (I believe). To give us a safe space to just vent our frustrations. Sure my sister isn't the lazy slobby mooch that I lead everyone to believe she is... oh wait SHE IS. But this is the place I can say that. Right?

I also think it's rather selfish of my coworker to get knocked up and then apply to work on my project and then let us know she's expecting after her probation period is up and we'll need to replace her in 6 months... sure its not legal to discriminate against her, but it's a big bitch move to do that to us. And I feel confident that I can say that here because it's a safe and supportive space. 

Also, my mom was/is a selfish careless person and had 3 accidents, myself included. She gave the first 3 up for adoption and then kept me, but really even though she was technically an adult, she has the maturity of a teenager. And let me tell you, that's not a fun house to grow up in. I've been taking care of her since I was taller than her. I turned out alright because I wanted to be nothing like her. So sure those teen moms that are irresponsible and think a baby will be their doll to love them forever may have kids that turn out just fine, but maybe they won't. My father wasn't in the picture, my mom went on welfare before I was 8. And she smoked through her entire pregnancy, and I had asthma as a kid and now I'm seemingly having difficulties conceiving. I have yet to go for testing but I suspect there's plumbing problems. (That was an interesting piece of info posted a page back...one more thing I can blame her for now)

And for all those who have read this thread and got offended... you don't see the Christians and the Atheists trolling each other's support threads do you? No you don't. So why are people trolling our vents? Now I'm going to get worried that I'll get kicked off because I will offend someone who has a sister, or a mom, or a coworker?

Or how about my post a few pages back where I got offended, miffed and frustrated and down right pissed off with the post about the 'magic trick' of 'just stop trying'... she didn't come on here and yell at me... and I kept my vent to this thread so as not to be a debbie downer and call her out for saying something that everyone that's TTC can't stand to hear ON MORE EFFING TIME!

Let's move on ladies. Vents are vents because we're hormonal, irrational and (speaking for myself) a little obsessed. If you don't like what's being said, move on and let us get on with our bitch-fest!


----------



## tsyhanochka

kassiaethne said:


> and please anyone who is a dentist don't get your feelings hurt that I am miffed about this. I know its irrational and not your personal fault I have a cavity or the other dentist didn't notice it right away, its just how I feel and its totally crazy I know this....:thumbup:

:haha:

You're my hero!


----------



## hunni12

How are we trolling? I mean just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean I'm not allowed to post or be here wtf. Like I said I usually poke my head here because I still try to help those ttc. But if I feel offended then I will say so. If I hurt someone then I would expect them to say so


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## AlyCon

hunni12 said:


> I'm sorry aly but you're out of line. My mom was a single parent to 4 having most in her teen years. No our father's wasn't there but I believe I turned out fine ..as stated before I'm sorry u haven't gotten your bfp yet but somethings should not be said. And yes I have gotten bashed on here because I made a rant so people do do it. I tried for 3 months so I do know the pain of seeing negatives. I do lurk here because I still try to help ladies ttc. No my life isn't easy but I work my ass to provide for my LO.. it's tough. Good luck to you.

Guess what??? MY MOM WAS A TEEN/ SINGLE MOM OF 4- BY 4 DIFFERENT MEN WHO WERENT WERENT AROUND- WE WERE ON WELFARE AND I TURNED OUT JUST FINE TOO! :thumbup: the point of my post was NOT to say that every one who has a kid as a teen will be a failure and their kids will be screwed up. I was just pointing out some of the struggles many (but not all!) of them may have at some point, and that it frustrates me that im having troubles even though my kids wont have those particular bad experiences. WE ALL WORK HARD for the things we have! I may not have a kid to take care of but i'm not sitting around eating bon bons! If anybody is out of line IT IS YOU. and if this is your idea of helping, you should STOP.


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## tsyhanochka

hunni12 said:


> How are we trolling? I mean just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean I'm not allowed to post or be here wtf. Like I said I usually poke my head here because I still try to help those ttc. But if I feel offended then I will say so. If I hurt someone then I would expect them to say so

Fine, you (and the others who posted against aly) have upset me by making me paranoid that I can't feel safe to post here any more. This was the one safe space I had.

Trolling by definition is posting "inflammatory, extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community, such as an online discussion forum, [...] with the primary intent of provoking readers into an emotional response or of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion."

By making me feel that I can't safely vent here without fear of judgement, you've provoked an emotional response, and you're disrupting the otherwise normal on-topic discussion. 

I'm well aware that I shouldn't 'feed the trolls' but this has become my new thing to vent about! Ladies who take offense on our thread when the damn thread reads "VENT THREAD! Things you wish you could say but can't":growlmad:

/rant


----------



## hunni12

Wow just wow ladies.


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## kassiaethne

hunni12 said:


> How are we trolling? I mean just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean I'm not allowed to post or be here wtf. Like I said I usually poke my head here because I still try to help those ttc. But if I feel offended then I will say so. If I hurt someone then I would expect them to say so

It isn't about you or your feelings, you trolling because you are saying things and causing problems in a thread not meant for it and have been told and informed the purpose of this thread and have decided regardless of it that your personal feelings are above the purpose of this venting sections. this venting section is to get our darker thoughts out to feel better and get things off our chest that we are to ashamed of saying normally. 

you have been told your personal feelings and personal life were in no way relevant to the purpose of this and that they were not trying to be a personal attack on your own personal way you decided to lead your life. but instead of backing off and letting these woman, who have frustrations and need this thread to vent and get some of this stress off their chests to better help them be able to have their child, have decided your personal feelings are more important then that. 

so how about, instead of exacerbating the situation you either take your problems with said person in IM's or just back off and stop reading this thread, because nothing in here will be butterflies and roses. it will be about shitty things that we think and feel and want to share.

Have you noticed anyone who happens to be pregnant coming in here and being all I'm offended because I'm pregnant and have been trying for years too! how dare you put me into the category of being pregnant super fast and not being grateful!!! NO because they know these are irrational feelings that we can't control and let us feel them to get over them rather then try and shame us into feeling bad for a feeling we can't control. 

so please if you are having your feelings hurt, just don't come in here and read the peoples posts. because NOTHING in here is saying anything kind or nice. so if your feelings are so sensitive that you can't have the understanding of why. then just at least have the respect to just ignore it and let these ladies use it for the therapeutic purposes it was meant to fulfill. 

tyvm


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## hunni12

&No I did not have an intent of making no one uncomfortable or upset but if I was offended I believe I have a right to say so. But I'm done because it would be wrong of this got closed from ladies who need and frequently use this thread over a petty argument


----------



## tsyhanochka

Did I mention that my sister used all my tampons and AF just showed up? 

And I'm not talking the last few, I'm talking the value pack I bought 2 cycles ago, and I have short cycles so that should have lasted me for months!

I can not wait for her to get a damn job and move the heck out!!!!


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## AlyCon

tsyhanochka said:


> I'm well aware that I shouldn't 'feed the trolls' but this has become my new thing to vent about! Ladies who take offense on our thread when the damn thread reads "VENT THREAD! Things you wish you could say but can't":growlmad:
> 
> /rant

Same here! I've been offended many times before on here but i've never replied to some one saying they were "out of line" or "shouldnt have said that" i know every one who vents is usually venting about a specific person/ event and isnt attacking the entire population of people who share the similarites of the person/ topic theyre venting about. and i do agree that now i'm definitely going to feel fearful of venting about certain topics, which defeats the purpose of this thread.


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## kassiaethne

tsyhanochka said:


> Did I mention that my sister used all my tampons and AF just showed up?
> 
> And I'm not talking the last few, I'm talking the value pack I bought 2 cycles ago, and I have short cycles so that should have lasted me for months!
> 
> I can not wait for her to get a damn job and move the heck out!!!!

lmao I am jealous with my AF I go through like 50 of those little suckers AND have to use panty liners at night. I can't blame you though. I hate it when inconsiderate people come visiting my inlaws. who are like 70-80 years old and on a fixed income. then take 40 minute showers, leave water running while they do dishes, leave all the lights on, and eat all the food....then stay out of the apartment the rest of the day without saying by or hi but using it as a free hotel...

electricity and such are not cheap in brazil but for some reason some people forget that when they go visiting other peoples houses when its not their bills. (which my husband and I pay some of their stuff because they are old and no way would we want them to be without anything)

Honestly when I have my child I have decided if they are a utility sucker, I'm going to start telling them, if you save money next month on the bill, you get the extra money for a couple months. Just for them to prove to themselves they can do it and how much money it REALLY costs and to give them an idea of what I pay and what could have been bought with the savings.

lol see thats how much it miffs me! I even made plans for teens I don't even have yet LMAO

not saying I don't use lights ever, I have 2 computers and an Ipad and am a gamer...yeah I do...I just don't leave all the lights on in rooms I'm not in and take showers that arn't 40 mins (granted mine are more like 25 but still less then 40 and it adds up in the end!! but I understand even I need one of those loong needa think about the world and universe and the meaning of life while standing in the water showers lol) just don't be douches and have those moments in SOMEONE ELSES HOUSE.


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## tsyhanochka

The kicker is she didn't even tell me she used them up!


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## kassiaethne

lol at least you realized it before you REALLY needed them. 


actually better thought just occurred to me. what if its a sign that you are pregnant and you WONT EVEN need them at the end of the month!!! huh! huh!!!!! MIND BLOWN!!!

*Ish in a oddball mood atm sorry*


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## Maizie000

So I've been Goggling and searching for months and I thought what I needed were success stories but it turns out I was wrong.
I needed this...
I needed to know that it's ok to cry and be so angry I can't see straight. It's ok not to be able to be in the same elevator as any of the three different pregnant women at work.
I needed to know that after nine IUI (4 as is, 2 with Clomid, 3 with injectibles) it's perfectly normal to want to punch my uterus in the face (or at the very least it doesn't make me a bad person).
This thread reminded me that I'm human and I cannot begin to tell you all how grateful I am just knowing that you're out there too.


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## MrsGreen12

This is the most amazing thread ever!

Ok here I go......I'm sooo sorry I called off those two days, you see I had a miscarriage which you already knew. I lost the most beautiful & precious gift in this world but I see how the timing of it was bad since those two days coincided with my scheduled day off and made it seem like I just wanted a long weekend. Oh yeah I totally get how you would think that after I started crying hysterically at work & told you that I was losing my baby. And thank you so much for demonstrating exactly the type of nurse that I will never be because clearly compassion & empathy are not your strong points. 

Thanks for letting me rant


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## sadangel777

Dear body:

You are a jerk. Why must you play mind games with me month after month? I hate you.

Sincerely,
Me


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## teako22

This is a vent. Not meant to offend anyone or to make changes to this website. Just a vent of the bad thoughts that run through my head and I know I shouldn't think them.
That being said....

To me if you are pregnant you should stay off the TTC forums. It is really hard to see posts from someone who has gotten what we all want. I just want to tell all the expecting women still posting to take there happy moment elsewhere. It feels like they are rubbing my nose in their bliss.


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## tsyhanochka

kassiaethne said:


> lactually better thought just occurred to me. what if its a sign that you are pregnant and you WONT EVEN need them at the end of the month!!! huh! huh!!!!! MIND BLOWN!!!
> 
> *Ish in a oddball mood atm sorry*

I like that thought but my usual spotting before af started yesterday so as much fun to think about as that is....its cycle #9 just about to arrive.

And odd ball moods are always welcome I have them quite frequently too :)


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## tamithomas

teako22 said:


> This is a vent. Not meant to offend anyone or to make changes to this website. Just a vent of the bad thoughts that run through my head and I know I shouldn't think them.
> That being said....
> 
> To me if you are pregnant you should stay off the TTC forums. It is really hard to see posts from someone who has gotten what we all want. I just want to tell all the expecting women still posting to take there happy moment elsewhere. It feels like they are rubbing my nose in their bliss.

I agree to a certain extent. I welcome any pregnant woman to post here just so long as they stay sensitive to the fact that the regulars of the TTC section don't have BFP yet therefore their feelings taking priority over the pregnant woman. They are stepping on our turf, respect our rules and feelings.

vent of the day:

DH's neck is still in pretty bad shape, may have to bring him to the doctors. If I don't get my BFP this month, I can feel next cycle already going to waste. He's had this neck problem before and it doesn't seem to be going away anytime soon.


----------



## LKPone

*creeps out from around the corner where she's been hiding*

Oh good! Things have calmed down on the VENT thread! :thumbup: I was about to start juggling to distract everybody from all the shouting! :haha:

My vent of the day (not TTC related today):

Dear Olympics tourists

Do all of the several million daily London commuters a favour and work out where you're going BEFORE you attempt to change on the underground. Stopping in the middle of a packed concourse, several thousand people deep, to check your tube map while everybody falls over you is NOT helpful! If you think that Londoners don't smile now, just wait until you stop dead in front of them while they're on their way to catch their train with 2 minutes to go before it leaves - it will not be pretty! :nope:

Thank you.

**This rant in no way is meant to offend anybody who lives in, commutes through, has ever thought of going to London. They're very smiley people... honest.**


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## CaliDreaming

teako22 said:


> This is a vent. Not meant to offend anyone or to make changes to this website. Just a vent of the bad thoughts that run through my head and I know I shouldn't think them.
> That being said....
> 
> To me if you are pregnant you should stay off the TTC forums. It is really hard to see posts from someone who has gotten what we all want. I just want to tell all the expecting women still posting to take there happy moment elsewhere. It feels like they are rubbing my nose in their bliss.

Yeah, I totally get what you're saying. It can be kind of awkward at times especially if it's an ongoing TTC thread. I always hate posting after them when they pop in to check in on us. I don't want to mess up the warm fuzzy mood by posting about my PMS and how depressed I am. 

When I was preggo, I totally abandoned all of my TTC friends for my due date club friends. I was sooooo happy not to be TTC anymore.


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## kassiaethne

I totally on the train of must be pregnant...because others im just a bitch....

I dunno whats wrong with me today, but EVERYTHING my husband says and does today...i want to punch him in the face....

And its not like hes doing anything particularly anoying, but my god he just looks at me to long and im irritated....then on top of it, when im usually able to control my inner bitch i come right out and tell him, i must be pregnant because everything you do irritates me atm.

He just sat there staring at me all wtf my feelings are hurt...and im just like....see that right there, you're irritating me RIGHT now....


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## laurac1988

ARGH DP you are fucking me off!!! Every day this week you have pissed me off!!! GET A GRIP OF YOURSELF!


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## J_Lynn

I really want to tell my step-kids that they should just stay at their mothers and never come back. They're on my last nerves today and I can't take the constant fighting, and their mother trying to control what the hell goes on in our house. 2 weeks out of the month I have to deal with this, and my stress level is through the roof - I never had headaches before them ... this is NOT helping with me trying to get pregnant if I can't stay relaxed for more than 2 weeks out of the month. I love them, but holy hell ... seriously ... I wish theyd just STFU already.


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## tamithomas

oooooo, that must be so hard taking care of your DH's kids while TTC'ing! I admire those who are able to do that, if I were stuck with step-kids I'd try to show as minimum affection as possible because I'd get too jealous knowing there are kids living in my home that are not mine.

Vent (none TTC related): I don't appreciate cops staking out my home for no good reason, parked in front of my house for 5 minutes with a pen and paper. The reason I know they were staking our house is where I live, each house is about 100 feet apart from each other. I do not trust anyone related to the justice system one bit. Apologies in advance if you are in any way part of the system weather that's lawyer, judge, cops, detectives, crown prosecutor you name it.. it's just my view.


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## sadangel777

Dear DH:

I'm allowed to be upset. I'm allowed to obsess. This is YOUR fault for making me wait 13 years to "NTNP."

You are a jerk.

Sincerely,

Me


----------



## teako22

Just saw the sonograms for my cousins baby number four. I am truly happy for her and her husband. They are wonderful parents and have the best kids. But I could just breakdown and cry.


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## J_Lynn

tamithomas said:


> oooooo, that must be so hard taking care of your DH's kids while TTC'ing! I admire those who are able to do that, if I were stuck with step-kids I'd try to show as minimum affection as possible because I'd get too jealous knowing there are kids living in my home that are not mine.
> 
> Vent (none TTC related): I don't appreciate cops staking out my home for no good reason, parked in front of my house for 5 minutes with a pen and paper. The reason I know they were staking our house is where I live, each house is about 100 feet apart from each other. I do not trust anyone related to the justice system one bit. Apologies in advance if you are in any way part of the system weather that's lawyer, judge, cops, detectives, crown prosecutor you name it.. it's just my view.

It IS hard ... and since she is the worlds WORST "mother", it makes it even more hard knowing that the most miserable, evil, toxic, worthless, whore of a woman was able to reproduce yet I can't .... and every time I look at them I just think about how I am not able to really be a "part" of him because I can't give him a child :cry: Of course he doesn't see it that way, and he is 150% supportive and is more involved in our baby-making adventure than I am (lol), so I know that's not how it is at all. And the girls are genuinely absolutely the best things to ever happen to me; they're sweet as can be most of the time - but they're 13 and 11 ... so they have their moments for sure. But they love me, and always tell me "we're the only kids you need, so if you don't have any that's ok - we're a family anyway" so I mean it's really just all in my head. The other day they were asking why I want a baby so bad (they're kids, they think babies are annoying ... lol) and I said, "Because I want to be a mommy and have kids of my own" the oldest said, "But we are your kids, too ..." and like said it like I just stabbed her in the heart. They don't understand; but that's OK - they don't have to. 

Trust me, it's hard ... it's very, very hard. At first I didn't think I could do it. If the kids weren't so sweet 97% of the time, there's no way I could. Well, that and the fact that his ex-wife cheated on him from the time they started dating when they were 15 up until he found out and divorced her trampy trashy self at 29 so he literally hates her guts and if she was on fire, and he had a glass of water he'd keep drinking it ... if they had a good friendly relationship and I had to deal with her, I wouldn't be able to do it. I couldn't stand seeing her and knowing that she gave him kids and here I am an infertile freak of nature. 

Well. Looks like meant-to-be-short-and-sweet reply turned into another rant. LOL


----------



## Glitter_Berrie

why are all of my friends all of a sudden preggo, when back int eh days when i wasnt ttc they werent? lol awkward and ugh


----------



## CdnEquestrian

Thanks J_Lynn. I have 2 step-daughters and sometimes I feel the exact same way as you. Their mother is poison as well and tries to pit the girls against their dad...telling them that we live 15 hours away because he doesn't love the girls, and saying that he NEVER pays child support, etc.

It's rough. I love those girls though... They're 17 and 18 now. The oldest just graduated and has finally realized that things her mother says are NOT true. She's coming to go to college up here, and will be living with us. I can't wait. She's into horses, so i'm the one who taught her how to ride when she was younger.

Her mom always told them that we were rich, and that their dad never pays child support, blah, blah, blah. It took R VISITING us to figure out that we are so NOT rich. We live paycheque to paycheque. She actually commented that her mom has a bigger house/nicer furniature/a newer car, etc. 

That's because her mom managed to work the welfare system into somehow buying her TWO houses which she owns free and clear. Her parents live in one, and she lives in the other. Tell me how THAT works....grrrr.


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## tamithomas

how can mothers be so cruel to their kids is beyond me!!! you would think the bonding during pregnancy would make you over the moon protective of them? Geez...there really should be an exam to know who can and can't reproduce lol


----------



## CaliDreaming

J-Lynn, awwww, your stepdaughters are sooooo sweet...but yeah, I have two stepdaughters that are around that age and it can be a tough job. No matter how much you love them and how much work you put into them, you will never be "mom". My stepdaughters are sweeties too and a lot of fun, but at times it is a thankless job. 

Mine are only with us two months out of the year and random holidays because their mom moved across the country soon after dh divorced her.


----------



## laurac1988

grrrrr AF where are you? I was SURE you were coming this morning... but you're still not here. When I told you to F off for 9months I meant send the stork... not just disappear!


----------



## tamithomas

Parents are coming in for the weekend, joy oh joy. We're gonna be going to an abandoned city for the day, I can hear the babies crying and toddlers running around already UGH. Wish there was somewhere in this world that was cheap and child free, that's excluding bars since I gave up drinking when we started TTC.


----------



## kassiaethne

grr...wait...today...I have nothing to be angry about O.O *touches ground to see if hell froze over*


----------



## AlyCon

To my grandparents:

I love you dearly, i really do. So when you guilted me into spending a whole week of my last three weeks home (before i move to germany) staying at your house instead of with my best friend, i respectfully obliged. HOWEVER, this has been one of the worst weeks of my life!! For one thing, im damn near starving to death because i'm too scared to eat or drink anything out of your old kitchen thats crawling with baby roaches!:nope: And then granny you have the nerve to insinsuate that i'm annorexic and trying to lose weight! Umm.. NO- i'd just rather starve to death than accidentally swallow a bug. Second- i'm tired as hell, walking around with dark circles under my eyes because i cant sleep, thanks again to your "little friends" that keep scurrying across the floor and on the table in the den where i have to sleep on a couch thats wayy too small to begin with but then of course the dog has to come and take up a whole cushion! Then the two of you have the audacity to sit me down and tell me that i'm being "innappropriate" by wearing my shorts! In case you havent noticed, Its the year 2012, and not only is it summer, but we're experiencing the hottest drought in over a hundred years with record breaking temperatures and heat index (in America)!! And it doesnt matter whether or not my husband is around- he bought me the shorts so obviously he knows im going to wear them. If he didnt want me wearing them while he was gone, he wouldve packed them into his suitcase and took them with him! But he didnt, so leave me alone and let me wear whatever the hell i want! And last but not least... I'M NOT YOUR F*CKING SLAVE SO STOP TREATING ME LIKE ONE!! I know you're old and you cant get around like you used to and i really am happy to help.. BUT THERES A LIMIT. I am so tired of sweeping and vacuuming the same rooms every day! Stop calling me away from what i'm doing to ask me to bring you a soda- "dont forget the ice!"- and to pick up your dirty plates after youre done eating. And if i have to wash another damn dish i'm going to rip my hair out and scream!!!!!!!! :growlmad: I cant wait to get out of here on saturday! I'll come back to visit you but i'd sleep on the street before i ever consider living here again for any amount of time. 

Love Always, 

Your Granddaughter


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## kassiaethne

AlyCon said:


> To my grandparents:
> 
> I love you dearly, i really do. So when you guilted me into spending a whole week of my last three weeks home (before i move to germany) staying at your house instead of with my best friend, i respectfully obliged. HOWEVER, this has been one of the worst weeks of my life!! For one thing, im damn near starving to death because i'm too scared to eat or drink anything out of your old kitchen thats crawling with baby roaches!:nope: And then granny you have the nerve to insinsuate that i'm annorexic and trying to lose weight! Umm.. NO- i'd just rather starve to death than accidentally swallow a bug. Second- i'm tired as hell, walking around with dark circles under my eyes because i cant sleep, thanks again to your "little friends" that keep scurrying across the floor and on the table in the den where i have to sleep on a couch thats wayy too small to begin with but then of course the dog has to come and take up a whole cushion! Then the two of you have the audacity to sit me down and tell me that i'm being "innappropriate" by wearing my shorts! In case you havent noticed, Its the year 2012, and not only is it summer, but we're experiencing the hottest drought in over a hundred years with record breaking temperatures and heat index (in America)!! And it doesnt matter whether or not my husband is around- he bought me the shorts so obviously he knows im going to wear them. If he didnt want me wearing them while he was gone, he wouldve packed them into his suitcase and took them with him! But he didnt, so leave me alone and let me wear whatever the hell i want! And last but not least... I'M NOT YOUR F*CKING SLAVE SO STOP TREATING ME LIKE ONE!! I know you're old and you cant get around like you used to and i really am happy to help.. BUT THERES A LIMIT. I am so tired of sweeping and vacuuming the same rooms every day! Stop calling me away from what i'm doing to ask me to bring you a soda- "dont forget the ice!"- and to pick up your dirty plates after youre done eating. And if i have to wash another damn dish i'm going to rip my hair out and scream!!!!!!!! :growlmad: I cant wait to get out of here on saturday! I'll come back to visit you but i'd sleep on the street before i ever consider living here again for any amount of time.
> 
> Love Always,
> 
> Your Granddaughter

ah man your post really had me thinking of the episode of hoarders, I feel like going and kidnapping you just thinking about those roaches, I'd have been all peace out day 1 after the first roach, been like oh I'm just going to sleep over at my friends....oh we are going out...oh I think we are going to be out late soooo I'm just going to sleep over again....and repeat


----------



## AlyCon

kassiaethne said:


> ah man your post really had me thinking of the episode of hoarders, I feel like going and kidnapping you just thinking about those roaches, I'd have been all peace out day 1 after the first roach, been like oh I'm just going to sleep over at my friends....oh we are going out...oh I think we are going to be out late soooo I'm just going to sleep over again....and repeat

yes omg my grandma is a borderline hoarder!! She shops way too much and my grandad had to build a second closet just for her stuff and then he had to build a THIRD one! But its just her clothes, she throws away things that need to be thrown out. I hate the episodes of hoarders where 90% of the stuff really is TRASH. and i hate the ones whose kitchens are gross. Even if i was a hoarder, my kitchen would still be SPOTLESS :thumbup:


----------



## kassiaethne

AlyCon said:


> kassiaethne said:
> 
> 
> ah man your post really had me thinking of the episode of hoarders, I feel like going and kidnapping you just thinking about those roaches, I'd have been all peace out day 1 after the first roach, been like oh I'm just going to sleep over at my friends....oh we are going out...oh I think we are going to be out late soooo I'm just going to sleep over again....and repeat
> 
> yes omg my grandma is a borderline hoarder!! She shops way too much and my grandad had to build a second closet just for her stuff and then he had to build a THIRD one! But its just her clothes, she throws away things that need to be thrown out. I hate the episodes of hoarders where 90% of the stuff really is TRASH. and i hate the ones whose kitchens are gross. Even if i was a hoarder, my kitchen would still be SPOTLESS :thumbup:Click to expand...


lmao yeah my mom is a boarderline hoarder, only because my dad and such has always kept things clean. i think if they ever divorce I feel bad for whatever house she destroys after that

seriously, I don't care what happens to the rest of my house, but the kitchen is a MUST to be clean. I never have had a single roach in my homes and I live in tropical countries like mexico and brazil....and I pin it all in being clean and having a cat LOL. I miss my cats (they are in the USA atm cuz couldn't have cats in mexico) my little predators were expert bug hunters, especially those moths, my cat would get a running start and go strait up walls to catch the ones that were close to the ceiling LOL. and when I had cats, I cleaned the litterbox 3x a day, aka whenever they took a crap I was there with shovel in hand already LOL.


----------



## AlyCon

kassiaethne said:


> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> kassiaethne said:
> 
> 
> ah man your post really had me thinking of the episode of hoarders, I feel like going and kidnapping you just thinking about those roaches, I'd have been all peace out day 1 after the first roach, been like oh I'm just going to sleep over at my friends....oh we are going out...oh I think we are going to be out late soooo I'm just going to sleep over again....and repeat
> 
> yes omg my grandma is a borderline hoarder!! She shops way too much and my grandad had to build a second closet just for her stuff and then he had to build a THIRD one! But its just her clothes, she throws away things that need to be thrown out. I hate the episodes of hoarders where 90% of the stuff really is TRASH. and i hate the ones whose kitchens are gross. Even if i was a hoarder, my kitchen would still be SPOTLESS :thumbup:Click to expand...
> 
> 
> lmao yeah my mom is a boarderline hoarder, only because my dad and such has always kept things clean. i think if they ever divorce I feel bad for whatever house she destroys after that
> 
> seriously, I don't care what happens to the rest of my house, but the kitchen is a MUST to be clean. I never have had a single roach in my homes and I live in tropical countries like mexico and brazil....and I pin it all in being clean and having a cat LOL. I miss my cats (they are in the USA atm cuz couldn't have cats in mexico) my little predators were expert bug hunters, especially those moths, my cat would get a running start and go strait up walls to catch the ones that were close to the ceiling LOL. and when I had cats, I cleaned the litterbox 3x a day, aka whenever they took a crap I was there with shovel in hand already LOL.Click to expand...

same here! i could care less about any other room but the kitchen! If some one has a dirty kitchen i think theyre dirty and i lose all respect for them. Cuz i can understand toys in the living room, clothes scattered in the laundry room, toothpaste smeared on the sink in the bathroom etc. Stuff happens. But you EAT in the kitchen. CLEAN IT!! Especially if youre having people over!! i sound like a crazy person but i dont care :) Oh and the dog ate a bug last night.. gross but its one less that i have to worry about so :thumbup: for the doggie


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## kassiaethne

haha thats how I look at it with my cats I stopped getting grossed out over it once I mentally designated it as their job. but also at least my cats don't lick me hehe. yeah thats exactly how I think, your kitchen is where you prep food and such. and ESPECIALLY when I come visiting, if its dirty i'm all...you knew I was comming....so I know you 'cleaned'....so how bad was it before I came that THIS is your version of cleaner?


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## AlyCon

Hahahaha! Idk why but i'm so tickled by that "this is your version of cleaner?" but Its actually kind of sad that people live like that. especially those that have kids. if theres one thing i cant stand its people who have their kids living dirty but thats a whole new rant..


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## kassiaethne

mhmm I've gone so far as while we are chatting, and they've eaten and I've...drank a soda...I take their plate and start doing the dishes to be a "polite guest" and after that end up cleaning and wiping down the whole kitchen while we talk and they don't even really notice. just cuz I'll have a tick in my eye the whole visit if I don't do something.

omg yes, my friend works in a day care area, and shes like...its a rich neighborhood, their parents dress clean and look good...kids? look like two dirty hobos that may or may not be lice infested.


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## AlyCon

OMG i'm so glad im not the only person who goes around doing other peoples dishes! haha Even if theyre clean i still like to wash my own plate at least. I feel like i'm being rude if i just toss my plate in the sink and walk away. 

now for the rant: 

I hate when parents look good and their kids look dirty. I dont see it much with rich people but where i live its the welfare moms who live in the ghetto that do this. They will have their hair done, nails done, new outfit, high heels, jewelery, *the new iPhone* etc. But their kids are DIRTY, the little girls hair wont be combed and the boys wont have haircuts, the clothes are too small and have stains and holes on them, their faces need to be washed and noses need to be wiped.. i mean its just disgusting!! And then they drop the kids off and as soon as their mom leaves the first thing they say is "I'm hungry!" And thats when i hit the roof! It makes me want to kick her ass be like bitch feed your kids! I mean come on, even if you dont buy them new clothes at least feed them!! And the fact that theyre on welfare and get food stamps make it worse! I know a girl who gets $500 a month for food but her kids are always hungry. How the f*ck does that happen?! I swear nothing makes me madder than a so called mom treating her kids like this while she has the best of everything for herself! SELFISH doesnt even begin to describe these women! And of course theyre the ones who can have ten kids with no problem while I'm struggling to even get my body to ovulate! (Not to get pregnant, just to just drop one damn egg!! and i cant even get that!) If kidnapping wasnt a crime i'd have a house full of kids that i took home with me because i couldnt stand to see them living like that any longer. I could go on for five pages ranting about this!!!


----------



## Storked

My rant:
Tired of always sacrificing or delaying one dream for another.


----------



## laurac1988

Hate living in a country where the healthcare system is so FUCKED that I have to wait until I'm eight weeks late to get a blood test to find out where my sodding period is!


----------



## PleaseLouise

So tired of feeling jealous. I live with my cousin and her family (our new home is having delays in renovation). Anyway, in a morning when I can hear her and her husband and 2 little girls all laughing in bed together and little voices squealing "mummy" or "daddy", my heart breaks. I want that! I NEED that! 

My cousin is amazing and has had many mc's so I don't begrudge her her happiness, I just cant help feeling jealous and the fact she's had it so hard makes me feel so guilty for being jealous!


----------



## tsyhanochka

Vent: hey AF thanks for finally showing up... on our anniversary! Happy Anniversary...my uterus feels like it's imploding! 

*searches for hot water bottle and advil*


----------



## kassiaethne

tsyhanochka said:


> Vent: hey AF thanks for finally showing up... on our anniversary! Happy Anniversary...my uterus feels like it's imploding!
> 
> *searches for hot water bottle and advil*

Awe damn sorry to hear it


----------



## pinksprinkles

tsyhanochka said:


> Vent: hey AF thanks for finally showing up... on our anniversary! Happy Anniversary...my uterus feels like it's imploding!
> 
> *searches for hot water bottle and advil*

Aw! Hugs to you hun! That's no fun at all. :dohh:


----------



## Iwillbepreggo

I really hate the pop up ads on here!:haha:


----------



## J_Lynn

I really want AF to start. Today was my last dose of provera, and whenever AF starts I get to go get my pelvic ultrasound on CD3 and my HSG on CD10, but I'm so damn sick of waiting. I just want to be fn pregnant already. It's driving me nuts. This is bullshit. Blahhh 6 years total I've been waiting to get pregnant and this is crapppppppp. I'm thankful it never happened with my exhusband now (hindsight is always 20/20 lol) but seriously. I'll be 29 in 4 months! I said I wanted a baby by 39! This keeps up, and I don't think I'm going to hit that goal!!!! Blerggggg


----------



## jojolabobo

Hey hope you ladies don't mind me joining in late but just wanted to have a little rant!

SIL - Please stop saying that your husband only has to look at you and you get pregnant, you have 5 children and I would give anything to have just one

MIL - Please stop putting my down for being worried about having PCOS. I know your friend had it and got pregnant when she wasn't even trying! But I am not your friend, I am trying I have been for a year but I'm not even ovulating so I feel like I have the right to be a little bit upset.

:) That does make you feel better xx


----------



## PleaseLouise

I'm sick of wishing away my life! I'm constantly praying days will pass faster; praying for O, praying for 2ww to pass, praying for af when BFN... Raaaaaaahhhhhhh! I've wished away over 4 years!!! 

JUST GIVE ME A GOD DAMN BABY!


----------



## Sparkes

AlyCon said:


> So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??

Who the hell do you actually think you are? Your life must be so perfect for you to sit here and bash? Pathetic...you really need to get a grip of yourself. Yes, I had my daughter at sixteen- she is most wonderful thing I have ever done. No, im not on benefits. My partner works to provide for us. I went back to college when my daughter was 10 days old, and in September im off to university to study to become a doctor.

Sorry to burst your sterotypical bubble...but I would love to hear what you have amounted to in life? Not very much im guessing. Maybe you should put your keyboard down for a minute and go and say those things to somebodies face, I would pay for front row seats to see what would happen.


----------



## hunni12

Omg sparkes I just knew u was going to do it!


----------



## Sparkes

I just couldn't help myself :rofl:


----------



## zoomlentil

Was that really necessary? It had already been smoothed out earlier. Why heighten the risk that this thread get closed?

edit to add:

You also seemed to have picked and chosen from the original 'offending' post to become insulted. Try reading properly next time. If you're so hell bent on showing us all how you're not just another immature teen statistic, I suggest you swallow your pride when it comes to things like this. This is a vent thread, a thread where people come to vent things that they wouldn't say in public - maybe not even to their own partners.

I can see both sides of the story, but please try to understand ours. I don't like seeing those from Preg come in and rub it in our faces in TTC because it shows us all what we don't have. I'm 22 and have been waiting to TTC for three years. I don't like having to look at someone's ticker that shows that they're several years younger than me, yet already pregnant with their second. It freaking hurts. A lot.


----------



## wanaBmummy

Sparkes said:


> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> So I just spent a few minutes stalking the teen pregnancy forum and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!! :growlmad: i mean i dont know any of them personally but i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies" and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!):dohh: Its not like i'm against having kids young, i'm 19. The difference between me and them is that i finished high school, im married, me and my husband live on our own and are financially stable and have BOTH agreed to start TTC. But of course i have PCOS and my body doesnt cooperate with a damn thing i want it to do!! Lucky me! And i really feel bad for being so judgemental because if it wasnt for my PCOS we would have probably been teen parents ourselves (although i think we would have still gotten married)! I wasnt on borth control and we never used condoms! Watching every other girl in my class have "oopsie" babies (and the fact that i was getting one period a year) is how i knew something had to be wrong with me! and there is. I feel horrible that i'm judging these girls but now that i know im having trouble TTC i kind of wish i would have been like them, even though i know that would have caused even bigger problems. Ughhhh.. Jealousy is an ugly confusing green monster!!! Ugh, this is more of a rant against myself i guess. Any body else share in my feelings??
> 
> Who the hell do you actually think you are? Your life must be so perfect for you to sit here and bash? Pathetic...you really need to get a grip of yourself. Yes, I had my daughter at sixteen- she is most wonderful thing I have ever done. No, im not on benefits. My partner works to provide for us. I went back to college when my daughter was 10 days old, and in September im off to university to study to become a doctor.
> 
> Sorry to burst your sterotypical bubble...but I would love to hear what you have amounted to in life? Not very much im guessing. Maybe you should put your keyboard down for a minute and go and say those things to somebodies face, I would pay for front row seats to see what would happen.Click to expand...

As you can see, your not the only one that goes looking through other forums and you've managed to rub a lot of people up the wrong way. I can see this ending up being locked because there are now alot of people in Teen Pregnancy who arn't happy and obviously there are also alot of hormones. 

Personally i spend alot of time in Teen Pregnancy. However i'm 21, 22 in September (therefore older than you) I have been working full time for 4 years and am just abouts to be promoted to manager. My husband who i have been married to for nearly a year and been with for nearly 4, has also been working full time for 3 years. We live in a 2 bed house and don't recieve any benifits. I will be going back to work 6 months after LO is born and FYI i spent nearly 7 months over here in TTC, meaning our daughter was very much planned and not an 'ooopsie'. 

I understand you have a right to vent as does anyone but when your on a website such as this, targeting a specific group isn't a very good idea. Especially when you put such a huge stereo type onto all of them and most are the same age as you. Also having personally spent alot of time in Teen Pregnancy i can gaurentee you majority of those girls are doing everythign they can to provide for their children, finish high school and give their child the best life possible. Yes some of them may have been accidents but it doesn't mean the mums to be arn't trying their hardest and for all you know could give their child a better life than those who have tried for their babies.

edit:

Yes i know i'm going to bashed now as the post wasn't aimed at me and i 'haven't read it properly' however you would probably have got less of a reaction if you had just stated about teens and not mentioned the teen pregnancy section.

_So I just spent a few minutes *stalking the teen pregnancy forum *and i know this probably makes me a huge bitch but i'm so pissed off now!!  i mean i dont know any of them personally but *i think its safe to say that most (if not all) of their pregnanciees were "oopsies"* and they are more likely to not have the fathers around, drop out of school, and end up on benifits which just makes me sad for those babies- and the girls! i know not all of them will end up with a bad life and im not saying they will be bad mothers but *the odds are stacked against them and their situation was 98% preventable (if they properly used birth control and condoms!)*_

You specifically targeted the girls who you are now hating on because they became offended by your vent. They have every right to be offended, your post was aimed at them. You may not see it as being a personal attack but if you look at what you originally put (yes i know you did another post) it most deffinatly was.


----------



## hunni12

zoomlentil said:


> Was that really necessary? It had already been smoothed out earlier. Why heighten the risk that this thread get closed?
> 
> edit to add:
> 
> You also seemed to have picked and chosen from the original 'offending' post to become insulted. Try reading properly next time. If you're so hell bent on showing us all how you're not just another immature teen statistic, I suggest you swallow your pride when it comes to things like this. This is a vent thread, a thread where people come to vent things that they wouldn't say in public - maybe not even to their own partners.
> 
> I can see both sides of the story, but please try to understand ours. I don't like seeing those from Preg come in and rub it in our faces in TTC because it shows us all what we don't have. I'm 22 and have been waiting to TTC for three years. I don't like having to look at someone's ticker that shows that they're several years younger than me, yet already pregnant with their second. It freaking hurts. A lot.

How can you say that basically pregnant people shouldn't come here when she came to our side of town first? No one is showing off our pregnancy and it's not our fault that it's hard for you ladies to conceive. I wish fertility problems on no one, but stop treating us like it's our fault.Not trying to be rude


----------



## foxyviola

So the constant questions continue, but this time it's "how are you enjoying being back at work" and "is it great to back?" like it's some kind of epic adventure.
Ya know that feeling you get when you just want to punch someone but you just nod and smile. I always think of things to say when the moments long one like " well I'd much rather be looking after my daughter who should be 9 months old now, but I guess it all seems a long time ago for you lot" and that irritating question " finished being a lady of leisure then?" LIKE MY TIME OFF WAS A LIFESTYLE CHOICE YOU BUNCH OF BELL ENDS!!!
Some people should have had their cake holes sewn up at birth.
Ah that's better.


----------



## tasha41

Here to hopefully clear a few things up.

Firstly, with regards to comments such as the ones that have been made about teen mothers, I need to draw your attention to our forum rules:



> Antisocial, discriminatory or offensive messages (intended or otherwise) aimed at the community at large, certain demographics (including parenting styles) or specific members, are not permitted.

*Vent threads are not exempted from following these rules.* 

People are free to go to TTC or Pregnancy forums as they please but please use your best judgement and sensitivity, if you are going to post please make sure it is going to be a helpful post. If you are finding yourself feeling defensive or upset by a TTC vent thread or the Teen Pregnancy forum in general, we're all quite capable of staying out of said forums & threads, correct ladies? 

I'm not going to close this thread because having a place to vent is genuinely helpful to some, but if any more problems arise from it, that decision may change.


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## laurac1988

Thank you for of closing, Tasha.

Ladies... Please stop attacking each other. Take it to PMs


----------



## GalvanBaby

My not making too much sense rant:

School friend on FB: How can you be pregnant with your 7th child by only God knows who ecause you don't and say you don't know why people would want more kids. If you don't want more kids, take BC or don't have SEX!! Some people are in healthy, happy relationships and can afford a child without government assitance so, we have the right to have another baby.

Cousin: Ok, it is good that you are having a boy. What I don't understand is how do you get out of prison after a 4 year term, get pregnant, and get married to the guy you went to prison for all in 1 month? I am really glad that your life is going good now and neithe rof you are on drugs and I love you to death, but don't rub this baby in my face. You know how I have been planning another baby for years and have been trying for the past 5 months. You know that my Dr told me that my chances of concieving after a year post Tubal reversal drop drasticaly so, DO NOT tell me that I will get pregnant when I am not trying and don't want to!! I will want to have a baby until I have one!!

SILs: Everyone of you are B*TCHES!! You are two faced fake ass Bsss!! How can you tell me I don't need to get pregnant?!!! OH and I have been married for almost 2 years and together for 6 years. We unlike you all and your spouses respect each other. How can you sit here and talk about our relationship when you all ahve your little boyfriends on the side yet are telling your husband that you are trying to get pregnant! What are you going to do when you do get pregnant and the baby comes out looking just like your boyfriend? Who happens to be you husbands best friend?

MIl and FIL: How can you run your only son off just because your daughters are jealous of his relationship and your youngest daughter can't control what he does. He is a grown man and does not need an 18 year old B*tch telling him what to do! How can you treat him as if he is stupid? Just becasue he has never lived in Mexico as an adult does not mean that he doesn't know anything about how to live here!!! Thank God he went to the US when he turned 18!! If he hadn't you all would have turned him into what you are today! Unhappily controlled by your daughters! We moved into your house becasue you asked us to, you told us you needed our help. What did you do? You tried to control OH and couldn't so you decided to make our life miserabel and treat us as if we are ad because we refuse to buy food to feed all of your daughters, their husbands, and their kids! They are not our responsibility and no way in Hell am I going to take money or food form what goes to my kids to support them when they are capable of doing it! So, you got what you want, you made your son feel so bad and upset us enough to where we left. We have been gone for a month and our life is back to normal. We don't need you or your dysfunctional ways of doing things!!!

BTW: Stop telling everybody that I don't really want a baby with your son and I just faked having surgery! That is so stupid!! OH was with me at the hospital and you were there afterwards and saw the freaking cut!! Why woudl you even say something like that?


----------



## kassiaethne

*eyetwitch* if this clock doesn't get moved to another room its going to be tossed out the window of a 4 story building. not only does it tick...it ticks off...instead of going through a rythmic tic...toc...tic...toc...its going tic..ti...c...toc...ti...c....to...c 

THIS IS MY MOTHER IN LAWS NEW FORM OF CHINESE TORTURE I TELL YOU


----------



## laurac1988

Ladies please! Can we stop fighting and take it to PM or something. This thread is for venting not attacking eachother


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## AlyCon

laurac1988 said:


> Ladies please! Can we stop fighting and take it to PM or something. This thread is for venting not attacking eachother

Sorry about all the drama. When i posted my vent i never even imagined that it would have provoked this kind of reponse, especially since i didnt think that already pregnant teens would be reading my post on TTC. But thats beside the point. I hope the drama stops here. I'm not making any more posts in refernce to the situation. Anybody who repsponds from here on out i will just treat it like another vent and keep scrolling. Again i'm sorry and i hope it stops.


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## kassiaethne

D: vent #2 of today...I secretly think this dog is hitting all the high notes today just to see if my eardrums really can bleed....good lord almighty it echos throughout the apartment and I feel it echoing through my head turning my brain to mush....I don't know if I'm being extra sensitive to sound today...or everything else is just extra loud and annoying today


----------



## laurac1988

Feel unbelievably ill. And have to work a stupid night shift :-( cries*


----------



## littlefishygg

Why is it that during the month my OH is away a massive crime spree hits my area and 3 houses on my road get broken into in one night. I am now spending my night sitting locked in my bedroom, with every light in the house on, clutching my phone and listening to every single noise around terrified that I am going to get broken into. We have lived here for 2 years without and single problem and the moment I get left alone, all hell breaks loose :(


----------



## Mischief

I've got a couple of rants to direct at myself...

I love to sew and knit baby gifts - so much that it usually doesn't bother me much that the gift isn't for my own baby. But after these last several unsuccessful TTC months I refused to attend two baby showers for coworkers this month. I didn't even send gifts. And I actually said to someone, "It's tacky to have a baby shower when it's not your first child." All because they both already have several healthy children each and I'm jealous. And even though I know that I was NOT NICE, I still have absolutely no desire to make it right. 

Another rant...

I don't like the way I act without the benefit of birth control pills to prevent PMS. I hate the depression, anxiety and obsessive behavior. I don't like myself this way. I know I should be willing to do what it takes to conceive if I really want it, but I honestly don't know how long I'll be able to live this way. I wish I could stay on the pill AND get pregnant! :wacko:


----------



## letbemommy

okay so here is y lovely rant
Okay so I went the clinic on Tuesday I believe and got a urine test done and of course it came back negative, I came home and told my boyfriend and he was lost as much as I was because we both swore that I was pregnant. I pretended to be fine but inside I want to cry every time I see something about a baby. We also talked that night and figured out our issue to why we weren't making love anymore. Hell our intimacy was out the window and we put it together that we were so concentrated on the baby thing that it wasn't fun anymore. Well we solved that problem and lets just say that it is alot better these days! Well now that we aren't thinking about it life has gotten better. I've got enough stress for ten grown men right now as it is so it was nice to take that off my load. But now we have run into another problem, DB was so convinced that I was and even was like we won't know until you get AF. Well lst night i brought it up because I couldn't sleep and can't take melatonin which he takes and he was like don't worry you aren't pregnant, what the fuck man make up your mind!Needless to say I am a bit irritated at this present moment. I either want AF to show up or the 28th to get here already because if no AF I am getting a blood test scheduled! Come on though seriously it would be nice to know before I am in my second trimester! Screw it not showing up in pee test! I would just love to know if I am carrying my child sometime in the near future! Okay I am done ranting. any other ladies had this problem with the pee test?


----------



## jodcay

I hate the constant ache for a baby. I want to scream at people who keep telling me that I'm lucky I'm only 30 and that I've got years ahead of me. 

I hosted a baby shower and spent most of the time in the kitchen avoiding speaking to anyone because I couldn't bare to talk about babies. What makes this even worse is that the lady I was hosting for had a long road with IVF. I'm the worst friend.


----------



## tsyhanochka

Sibling vent. At what point am I allowed to kick out my sister? She's been living with us since April and can't find or keep a decent job. I don't want rent just help around the house but she sleeps until 4 and doesn't do her own dishes let alone help out with other chores. She used all my tampons and regularly finishes the milk it other things with out letting me know.


----------



## kassiaethne

I say sit her down, talk with her about the issues, and give her a month to shape up. and if she just shrugs it off and doesn't care and doesn't shape up, time to find a new place. but thats just me


----------



## marron

AlyCon said:


> Seriously? All i have to say is that i chose to vent on a vent thread and am now being PERSONALLY ATTCKED for letting out my feelings where i though i had a safe place to do so.

There is no such thing as a "safe place" on a public message board. Yes, you're entitled to your vents and rants, just as other readers are entitled to be offended and sound off, especially on a site called BABY AND BUMP. :dohh:


----------



## CaliDreaming

I work for a social services agency in my state and part of my job involves taking children away from unfit parents. I hate that any woman has to go through infertility but what I hate more is seeing children suffer for their parents' mistakes. 

The hardest ones for me are the drug addicts. I don't know what it is about them but they are incredibly fertile. I had a case with one woman and by the time the state got enough evidence to take her child away she had had another child and by the time of the hearing was pregnant with yet another. It is not uncommon for them to have eight or more children and to have all of them taken. It is so heartbreaking what those kids have to go through.

It really boggles my mind. These women have all kinds of risky unprotected sex but instead of stds and pid they get babies.

Anyway ladies the one positive I can see from infertility is for the children. I have never had a case involving a family that had fertility issues. When we do become mothers our kids will be extremely lucky. All parents love their children but I do think the parents who have to struggle cherish those children in a special way. And I hope that doesn't offend anyone because I say that as a mom who was able to conceive my first child naturally in under a year.


----------



## CaliDreaming

Mischief said:


> I've got a couple of rants to direct at myself...
> 
> I love to sew and knit baby gifts - so much that it usually doesn't bother me much that the gift isn't for my own baby. But after these last several unsuccessful TTC months I refused to attend two baby showers for coworkers this month. I didn't even send gifts. And I actually said to someone, "It's tacky to have a baby shower when it's not your first child." All because they both already have several healthy children each and I'm jealous. And even though I know that I was NOT NICE, I still have absolutely no desire to make it right.
> 
> Another rant...
> 
> I don't like the way I act without the benefit of birth control pills to prevent PMS. I hate the depression, anxiety and obsessive behavior. I don't like myself this way. I know I should be willing to do what it takes to conceive if I really want it, but I honestly don't know how long I'll be able to live this way. I wish I could stay on the pill AND get pregnant! :wacko:




jodcay said:


> I hate the constant ache for a baby. I want to scream at people who keep telling me that I'm lucky I'm only 30 and that I've got years ahead of me.
> 
> I hosted a baby shower and spent most of the time in the kitchen avoiding speaking to anyone because I couldn't bare to talk about babies. What makes this even worse is that the lady I was hosting for had a long road with IVF. I'm the worst friend.

Ladies definitely don't feel bad about being jealous. You need to worry about taking care of yourself so if you don't feel you're able to be happy for pregnant women don't force yourself if you're not ready. I know when I was pregnant I was too wrapped up in preparing for the baby and enjoying the experience to keep tabs on who was and was not happy for me. When I was ttc the first time around it would take me weeks to get in the right frame of mind to go to a baby shower and even now if you catch me on a bad day I may not be up to one. It's a totally natural feeling.




tsyhanochka said:


> Sibling vent. At what point am I allowed to kick out my sister? She's been living with us since April and can't find or keep a decent job. I don't want rent just help around the house but she sleeps until 4 and doesn't do her own dishes let alone help out with other chores. She used all my tampons and regularly finishes the milk it other things with out letting me know.

You are better than me because I wouldn't have let her stay in the first place. She'd have to go stay with mom.


----------



## jcombs35

Wow...I didn't come in here for a while because I was going crazy with my issues.....

Anyways, my stupid body is ********. We've been ttc for 6 months now, and it's just one thing after another. First cycle, I had a huge kidney stone that needed surgery to break up, then had to have a stent in for 2 weeks. Finally got AF so we could start trying.

Everything goes okay, as I knew I probably wouldn't get pregnant immediately. Then about a week before AF is due in June, I start noticing symptoms. When AF didn't come, I assumed I was pregnant. Test after test came back negative. Even went to the doctor for blood test, and when it came back negative, she acted like I was stupid for even coming in....

Then I get AF in July, happy to start trying again, AF ends, and 4 days later I get weird spotting. Started out pink, turned bright red and then brown. So just for the heck of it, I poas. 3 faint positives later, everyone is telling me it would probably show up on a digi....

BFN on digital. I am sick of being confused. I am sick of symptom spotting. I am sick of thinking this is it, and then being disappointed, and I'm sick of my DH looking at me like I'm making all of this up!!!!


I am not trying to rub anything in anyone's face. I am truly very confused, and not even sure if I was getting a faint positive or an evap line....


----------



## hunni12

jcombs35 said:


> Wow...I didn't come in here for a while because I was going crazy with my issues.....
> 
> Anyways, my stupid body is ********. We've been ttc for 6 months now, and it's just one thing after another. First cycle, I had a huge kidney stone that needed surgery to break up, then had to have a stent in for 2 weeks. Finally got AF so we could start trying.
> 
> Everything goes okay, as I knew I probably wouldn't get pregnant immediately. Then about a week before AF is due in June, I start noticing symptoms. When AF didn't come, I assumed I was pregnant. Test after test came back negative. Even went to the doctor for blood test, and when it came back negative, she acted like I was stupid for even coming in....
> 
> Then I get AF in July, happy to start trying again, AF ends, and 4 days later I get weird spotting. Started out pink, turned bright red and then brown. So just for the heck of it, I poas. 3 faint positives later, everyone is telling me it would probably show up on a digi....
> 
> BFN on digital. I am sick of being confused. I am sick of symptom spotting. I am sick of thinking this is it, and then being disappointed, and I'm sick of my DH looking at me like I'm making all of this up!!!!
> 
> 
> I am not trying to rub anything in anyone's face. I am truly very confused, and not even sure if I was getting a faint positive or an evap line....

Hmmm I think faints could be a good sign. Digis can take a longer time to register than other tests. I would say wait a few days for hcg to double then test again. Do you have pictures of the tests?


----------



## letbemommy

So one thing that is getting to me is not knowing if I am pregnant or not! I have gotten BFN after BFN but still no sign of AF. I know that I have to wait until the 28th to get a blood test just to truely find out. I just want to know and not knowing is driving me up a wall and back! Plus my DB keeps going back and forth on me being PG or not! He can't even make up his mind what he thinks and im like please someone tell me!


----------



## zoomlentil

My rant of the day, not ttc related: Hypocrites! How I hate hypocrites! And yet I find myself surrounded by them..


----------



## jcombs35

letbemommy said:


> So one thing that is getting to me is not knowing if I am pregnant or not! I have gotten BFN after BFN but still no sign of AF. I know that I have to wait until the 28th to get a blood test just to truely find out. I just want to know and not knowing is driving me up a wall and back! Plus my DB keeps going back and forth on me being PG or not! He can't even make up his mind what he thinks and im like please someone tell me!

I went through that in June. I was certain I was, but tests kept coming back BFN. I know how frustrating and stressful it is. I wish you the best!


----------



## jcombs35

hunni12 said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> Wow...I didn't come in here for a while because I was going crazy with my issues.....
> 
> Anyways, my stupid body is ********. We've been ttc for 6 months now, and it's just one thing after another. First cycle, I had a huge kidney stone that needed surgery to break up, then had to have a stent in for 2 weeks. Finally got AF so we could start trying.
> 
> Everything goes okay, as I knew I probably wouldn't get pregnant immediately. Then about a week before AF is due in June, I start noticing symptoms. When AF didn't come, I assumed I was pregnant. Test after test came back negative. Even went to the doctor for blood test, and when it came back negative, she acted like I was stupid for even coming in....
> 
> Then I get AF in July, happy to start trying again, AF ends, and 4 days later I get weird spotting. Started out pink, turned bright red and then brown. So just for the heck of it, I poas. 3 faint positives later, everyone is telling me it would probably show up on a digi....
> 
> BFN on digital. I am sick of being confused. I am sick of symptom spotting. I am sick of thinking this is it, and then being disappointed, and I'm sick of my DH looking at me like I'm making all of this up!!!!
> 
> 
> I am not trying to rub anything in anyone's face. I am truly very confused, and not even sure if I was getting a faint positive or an evap line....
> 
> Hmmm I think faints could be a good sign. Digis can take a longer time to register than other tests. I would say wait a few days for hcg to double then test again. Do you have pictures of the tests?Click to expand...

Yes. https://s1163.photobucket.com/albums/q559/jcombs355/


----------



## teako22

I wish my body came with a manual. Plus one of those turkey popper things to tell me when it has finely happened would be nice.


----------



## Trying2b2mums

so sick of trying, and so sick of BFNs but i want a baby, do does DP... sick of the symptoms that make up my TWW, sick of imagining or forcing symptoms!!!! Everyone around me is pregnant, or has young ones and working on #2 or #3, sister has 2 boys and is looking forward to trying for a baby girl soon, and doesnt care to talk to me about me having my first!!! Whens it MY TURN!! :growlmad:


----------



## PleaseLouise

jcombs35 said:


> hunni12 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> Wow...I didn't come in here for a while because I was going crazy with my issues.....
> 
> Anyways, my stupid body is ********. We've been ttc for 6 months now, and it's just one thing after another. First cycle, I had a huge kidney stone that needed surgery to break up, then had to have a stent in for 2 weeks. Finally got AF so we could start trying.
> 
> Everything goes okay, as I knew I probably wouldn't get pregnant immediately. Then about a week before AF is due in June, I start noticing symptoms. When AF didn't come, I assumed I was pregnant. Test after test came back negative. Even went to the doctor for blood test, and when it came back negative, she acted like I was stupid for even coming in....
> 
> Then I get AF in July, happy to start trying again, AF ends, and 4 days later I get weird spotting. Started out pink, turned bright red and then brown. So just for the heck of it, I poas. 3 faint positives later, everyone is telling me it would probably show up on a digi....
> 
> BFN on digital. I am sick of being confused. I am sick of symptom spotting. I am sick of thinking this is it, and then being disappointed, and I'm sick of my DH looking at me like I'm making all of this up!!!!
> 
> 
> I am not trying to rub anything in anyone's face. I am truly very confused, and not even sure if I was getting a faint positive or an evap line....
> 
> Hmmm I think faints could be a good sign. Digis can take a longer time to register than other tests. I would say wait a few days for hcg to double then test again. Do you have pictures of the tests?Click to expand...
> 
> Yes. https://s1163.photobucket.com/albums/q559/jcombs355/Click to expand...

Almost certainly BFP! Digi's aren't as sensitive which may explain your BFN. CONGRATULATIONS xxxxx


----------



## jcombs35

PleaseLouise said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> hunni12 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> Wow...I didn't come in here for a while because I was going crazy with my issues.....
> 
> Anyways, my stupid body is ********. We've been ttc for 6 months now, and it's just one thing after another. First cycle, I had a huge kidney stone that needed surgery to break up, then had to have a stent in for 2 weeks. Finally got AF so we could start trying.
> 
> Everything goes okay, as I knew I probably wouldn't get pregnant immediately. Then about a week before AF is due in June, I start noticing symptoms. When AF didn't come, I assumed I was pregnant. Test after test came back negative. Even went to the doctor for blood test, and when it came back negative, she acted like I was stupid for even coming in....
> 
> Then I get AF in July, happy to start trying again, AF ends, and 4 days later I get weird spotting. Started out pink, turned bright red and then brown. So just for the heck of it, I poas. 3 faint positives later, everyone is telling me it would probably show up on a digi....
> 
> BFN on digital. I am sick of being confused. I am sick of symptom spotting. I am sick of thinking this is it, and then being disappointed, and I'm sick of my DH looking at me like I'm making all of this up!!!!
> 
> 
> I am not trying to rub anything in anyone's face. I am truly very confused, and not even sure if I was getting a faint positive or an evap line....
> 
> Hmmm I think faints could be a good sign. Digis can take a longer time to register than other tests. I would say wait a few days for hcg to double then test again. Do you have pictures of the tests?Click to expand...
> 
> Yes. https://s1163.photobucket.com/albums/q559/jcombs355/Click to expand...
> 
> Almost certainly BFP! Digi's aren't as sensitive which may explain your BFN. CONGRATULATIONS xxxxxClick to expand...

You think so even though this morning's was just as light as the first one I took? It's got me thinking I'm probably not...


----------



## PleaseLouise

They just don't look like any evap I've ever had! Also, surely you wouldn't get THAT many evaps? Keep me updated?xx


----------



## jcombs35

PleaseLouise said:


> They just don't look like any evap I've ever had! Also, *surely you wouldn't get THAT many evaps?* Keep me updated?xx

That's _exactly _what I thought! Surely it's not 3 evap lines, or 3 false positives is it? I am just so darned confused and really the only thing I can do is wait. Waiting sucks. Nothing is worse than waiting!!!


----------



## CaliDreaming

jcombs35 said:


> hunni12 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> Wow...I didn't come in here for a while because I was going crazy with my issues.....
> 
> Anyways, my stupid body is ********. We've been ttc for 6 months now, and it's just one thing after another. First cycle, I had a huge kidney stone that needed surgery to break up, then had to have a stent in for 2 weeks. Finally got AF so we could start trying.
> 
> Everything goes okay, as I knew I probably wouldn't get pregnant immediately. Then about a week before AF is due in June, I start noticing symptoms. When AF didn't come, I assumed I was pregnant. Test after test came back negative. Even went to the doctor for blood test, and when it came back negative, she acted like I was stupid for even coming in....
> 
> Then I get AF in July, happy to start trying again, AF ends, and 4 days later I get weird spotting. Started out pink, turned bright red and then brown. So just for the heck of it, I poas. 3 faint positives later, everyone is telling me it would probably show up on a digi....
> 
> BFN on digital. I am sick of being confused. I am sick of symptom spotting. I am sick of thinking this is it, and then being disappointed, and I'm sick of my DH looking at me like I'm making all of this up!!!!
> 
> 
> I am not trying to rub anything in anyone's face. I am truly very confused, and not even sure if I was getting a faint positive or an evap line....
> 
> Hmmm I think faints could be a good sign. Digis can take a longer time to register than other tests. I would say wait a few days for hcg to double then test again. Do you have pictures of the tests?Click to expand...
> 
> Yes. https://s1163.photobucket.com/albums/q559/jcombs355/Click to expand...

Those definitely look like positives to me. There can be lots of reasons why the line isn't dark. Also I used Internet cheapies the first time around and always found that those lines were lighter than store brands. I only used a digi after the line started to get dark on the store brand because I knew they weren't as sensitive. 

Hope those lines get darker for you soon!


----------



## PleaseLouise

Today's rant: people who complain about children being children! Yesterday hubby and i took our nieces out for a meal, they are 2 and 5, the amount of head shaking and tutting we had from people was ridiculous! Grrrrrr!!!


----------



## jcombs35

CaliDreaming said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> hunni12 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> Wow...I didn't come in here for a while because I was going crazy with my issues.....
> 
> Anyways, my stupid body is ********. We've been ttc for 6 months now, and it's just one thing after another. First cycle, I had a huge kidney stone that needed surgery to break up, then had to have a stent in for 2 weeks. Finally got AF so we could start trying.
> 
> Everything goes okay, as I knew I probably wouldn't get pregnant immediately. Then about a week before AF is due in June, I start noticing symptoms. When AF didn't come, I assumed I was pregnant. Test after test came back negative. Even went to the doctor for blood test, and when it came back negative, she acted like I was stupid for even coming in....
> 
> Then I get AF in July, happy to start trying again, AF ends, and 4 days later I get weird spotting. Started out pink, turned bright red and then brown. So just for the heck of it, I poas. 3 faint positives later, everyone is telling me it would probably show up on a digi....
> 
> BFN on digital. I am sick of being confused. I am sick of symptom spotting. I am sick of thinking this is it, and then being disappointed, and I'm sick of my DH looking at me like I'm making all of this up!!!!
> 
> 
> I am not trying to rub anything in anyone's face. I am truly very confused, and not even sure if I was getting a faint positive or an evap line....
> 
> Hmmm I think faints could be a good sign. Digis can take a longer time to register than other tests. I would say wait a few days for hcg to double then test again. Do you have pictures of the tests?Click to expand...
> 
> Yes. https://s1163.photobucket.com/albums/q559/jcombs355/Click to expand...
> 
> Those definitely look like positives to me. There can be lots of reasons why the line isn't dark. Also I used Internet cheapies the first time around and always found that those lines were lighter than store brands. I only used a digi after the line started to get dark on the store brand because I knew they weren't as sensitive.
> 
> Hope those lines get darker for you soon!Click to expand...

Thanks. I hope you're right.


----------



## tamithomas

Well, I'm back from the infamous weekend with the parents..and what do you know, my gutt feeling didn't fail. It was baby talk all weekend UGH. I could feel my uterus crying everytime to babys name got mentioned, mind you for a bad reason though. The poor LO of my SIL and Step Brother has a UTI. But still, I didn't wanna hear about it but it's my father in laws grandson so he had a right to be worried. Why can't i just turn these jealous feelings off like a light switch already!! Rest of the weekend went great though. Just so pissed everytime I hear about the accident LO from a girl who doesn't have a job, don't think she's graduated from high school and got the baby out of trickery by hiding the fact she stopped the pill from my step brother


----------



## hunni12

jcombs35 said:


> hunni12 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> Wow...I didn't come in here for a while because I was going crazy with my issues.....
> 
> Anyways, my stupid body is ********. We've been ttc for 6 months now, and it's just one thing after another. First cycle, I had a huge kidney stone that needed surgery to break up, then had to have a stent in for 2 weeks. Finally got AF so we could start trying.
> 
> Everything goes okay, as I knew I probably wouldn't get pregnant immediately. Then about a week before AF is due in June, I start noticing symptoms. When AF didn't come, I assumed I was pregnant. Test after test came back negative. Even went to the doctor for blood test, and when it came back negative, she acted like I was stupid for even coming in....
> 
> Then I get AF in July, happy to start trying again, AF ends, and 4 days later I get weird spotting. Started out pink, turned bright red and then brown. So just for the heck of it, I poas. 3 faint positives later, everyone is telling me it would probably show up on a digi....
> 
> BFN on digital. I am sick of being confused. I am sick of symptom spotting. I am sick of thinking this is it, and then being disappointed, and I'm sick of my DH looking at me like I'm making all of this up!!!!
> 
> 
> I am not trying to rub anything in anyone's face. I am truly very confused, and not even sure if I was getting a faint positive or an evap line....
> 
> Hmmm I think faints could be a good sign. Digis can take a longer time to register than other tests. I would say wait a few days for hcg to double then test again. Do you have pictures of the tests?Click to expand...
> 
> Yes. https://s1163.photobucket.com/albums/q559/jcombs355/Click to expand...

I agree with the other ladies that does look like bfp! I hear those IC's aren't as sensitive as they claim to be. Maybe buy a FRER. I'm rooting for you


----------



## CdnEquestrian

Agreed! Looks like a BFP to me, jcombs!!!! :) Congrats! Keep us posted!



AFM....yeast infection. Boo. The last time I had a yeast infection, I was like...10. I feel so dirty. I KNOW it's not caused by being dirty but still. Boo. Due to start second round of clomid in about a week too...so hoping it's cleared up by then.


----------



## jcombs35

Ha!! My spotting now has clots... took fmu test strip test this morning with faint line taking forever to show. So I was sitting here bummed out. I had a digi left that I was going to use in the morning, and I thought, "Screw it." So I went in and took it.....

"Pregnant."

Ha! At least now I know I'm not crazy... I trust the digital. Now to get to the doctor about this worrisome bleeding....


----------



## jojolabobo

to my work collegue: Who just came up to me out of no where and asked me when I'm having a baby. Then when I tried to brush it off saying maybe sometime in the future turned round to me and said 'Whats your problem, don't you like babies? Don't you want children'!!!!! I laughed it off but what I really wanted to say was YES I LOVE BABIES, I WANT CHILDREN MORE THAN ANYTHING, I'VE BEEN TRYING FOR A YEAR AND NOTHING HAS HAPPENED AND THEN ON FRIDAY I GOT TOLD I HAVE PCOS SO I DONT KNOW HOW LONG ITS GOING TO TAKE ME, SO IN FUTURE I SUGGEST YOU MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!!!!!!

....and breath again


----------



## jojolabobo

jcombs35 said:


> Ha!! My spotting now has clots... took fmu test strip test this morning with faint line taking forever to show. So I was sitting here bummed out. I had a digi left that I was going to use in the morning, and I thought, "Screw it." So I went in and took it.....
> 
> "Pregnant."
> 
> Ha! At least now I know I'm not crazy... I trust the digital. Now to get to the doctor about this worrisome bleeding....

Congratulations :), I've heard of lots of people who have bleeding in early pregnancy I'm sure it will be fine, best to get checked out though XX


----------



## jcombs35

Thank you! I feel a billion times better just knowing I'm not flipping crazy!


----------



## CaliDreaming

jcombs35 said:


> Thank you! I feel a billion times better just knowing I'm not flipping crazy!

Congrats! Hope you have a happy and healthy nine months!


----------



## CaliDreaming

I'm now almost one week into my two week wait and all of a sudden I've become very depressed. It's too early to test, but in my heart I know I'm not going to get a BFP this cycle and maybe never. 

I just want to go home, crawl into bed and cry. I am so tired of this...


----------



## jcombs35

CaliDreaming said:


> I'm now almost one week into my two week wait and all of a sudden I've become very depressed. It's too early to test, but in my heart I know I'm not going to get a BFP this cycle and maybe never.
> 
> I just want to go home, crawl into bed and cry. I am so tired of this...

Don't lose hope! I am not one that gets pregnant easily, so I know how frustrating it is. The worst thing in the world is waiting, and sometimes you do just know it's not going to happen during a certain cycle. And there's nothing wrong with crawling in bed and crying every now and then. God knows I've done it a few times!


----------



## tamithomas

jojolabobo said:


> to my work collegue: Who just came up to me out of no where and asked me when I'm having a baby. Then when I tried to brush it off saying maybe sometime in the future turned round to me and said 'Whats your problem, don't you like babies? Don't you want children'!!!!! I laughed it off but what I really wanted to say was YES I LOVE BABIES, I WANT CHILDREN MORE THAN ANYTHING, I'VE BEEN TRYING FOR A YEAR AND NOTHING HAS HAPPENED AND THEN ON FRIDAY I GOT TOLD I HAVE PCOS SO I DONT KNOW HOW LONG ITS GOING TO TAKE ME, SO IN FUTURE I SUGGEST YOU MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!!!!!!
> 
> ....and breath again

wow i'm...i'm flabergasted. insensitive b***h she is! I hate the "so when are you gonna make one of these?" or "so when's baby gonna happen, you guys have already been together 3 years now" don't you think i know that?! Worst is it's always the ones who never wanted to be parents that are now or practically just shared a soap and got pregnant that make those remarks ugh.


----------



## AlyCon

*to my mother:* if i want to have a baby with my husband then i will!! Bottom line, end of story! We have the right to do whatever we want and to have some privacy while doing it. We support ourselves and dont ask you for a damn thing, so i dont see how you think you have any say in our decision making. In fact you're the one asking US for money every five minutes- and we give it to you, no problem! But even still we stay out of your business. So have some decency and do the same. Cuz i'd be wrong if i cursed you out and told you to leave me the hell alone! Ohh.. i'd be SO WRONG THEN! And you'd play the victim (as you often do) and go around and tell EVERYBODY what i did and then i'd be the bad guy, from coast to coast. And STOP answering questions for me and telling all of our family and friends that we're waiting five years to have a child. Cuz theres two major problems with that!! 1. i'm perfectly capable of speaking for myself so i dont need (or want) you to speak for me and 2. *I'M ALREADY TTC!!* But you wouldnt know that because i havent told you or really anybody for that matter because i'd like to keep that private between me and him. Seriously just stop telling everybody that five year lie to try to save your own image. Stop caring so much what other people think! I know theres gossip about me getting married so young and if i were to get pregnant right away the gossip would get worse. but guess what.. I DONT CARE! AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU!! its my life, my body, my marriage, my family! And you need to respect that! omg you drive me so crazy sometimes, i'm DREADING your visit in two weeks! DREADING IT!! and i'm not dealing with your bullshit when you get here so you better not try to start anything with me cuz it will not end well. The only thing that will even make you tolerable to me is knowing that this will be the last time i see you before i move to Germany. I cant wait to get on that plane and know that when i land, there will be AN ENTIRE OCEAN BETWEEN US and a time difference that i can use as an excuse to ignore your calls :haha: :happydance: 

Now if only i could grow some balls and actually tell her that.. :blush:


----------



## Fizzyfefe

I just want to scream out loud that my reproductive system sucks. Stupid uterus, stupid hormones, stupid sticky CM, stupid ovaries not releasing eggs when you're supposed to... UGH!


----------



## jcombs35

It was too easy wasn't it? After everything, finally thinking I am no longer crazy. Now an hour later, I am back to thinking I am! How in the hell do I have 6 BFP's and get shot down so quickly by a probably cheap test from the doctor??? WTH??


----------



## AlyCon

jcombs35 said:


> It was too easy wasn't it? After everything, finally thinking I am no longer crazy. Now an hour later, I am back to thinking I am! How in the hell do I have 6 BFP's and get shot down so quickly by a probably cheap test from the doctor??? WTH??

:hugs::hugs::hugs: So sorry for what you're going through. I saw your post on another thread about your doctors visit, and i cant believe your doctor dismissed you like that! Theres no worse feeling than being turned away by the person you thought would be the most help to you. And yes they use the cheapest tests on the planet! :growlmad: i'm pretty sure they use the tiny rectangle tests that come with the dropper. Anyway, i hope things get better for you. Fingers crossed you get a sticky BFP soon!! :hugs::hugs::hugs: :dust:


----------



## jcombs35

AlyCon said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> It was too easy wasn't it? After everything, finally thinking I am no longer crazy. Now an hour later, I am back to thinking I am! How in the hell do I have 6 BFP's and get shot down so quickly by a probably cheap test from the doctor??? WTH??
> 
> :hugs::hugs::hugs: So sorry for what you're going through. I saw your post on another thread about your doctors visit, and i cant believe your doctor dismissed you like that! Theres no worse feeling than being turned away by the person you thought would be the most help to you. And yes they use the cheapest tests on the planet! :growlmad: i'm pretty sure they use the tiny rectangle tests that come with the dropper. Anyway, i hope things get better for you. Fingers crossed you get a sticky BFP soon!! :hugs::hugs::hugs: :dust:Click to expand...

It wasn't a triangle, but it was one of those cassette type things that they use a dropper with. I know because when I disputed her reading, she held it out and said, "See?" I asked about a blood test, but she said there's no reason to do one because basically I haven't even missed a period yet. I swear if this turns out to really be pregnant, I'm taking my results in and shoving them in her face!!!!!!


----------



## Rudolf168

J_Lynn said:


> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> Thank goodness for this thread!! So i already HATE going on facebook because of all the pregnant girls and new moms that are constantly posting statuses and pictures about their babies and it makes so me jealous i could explode!!!! But today when i logged in i was greeted with a wall post notification. A friend from highshool posted something to me on my wall, so i clicked to go to my page.
> 
> Her post read:  "So now that you're married when are we going to see little Alyson's running around? lol"
> 
> I WAS FURIOUS AND MORTIFIED!!!! :growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:
> 
> But i tried to keep my cool. I wanted to delete it but i didnt want to seem rude or give off the impression that i was angry or over sensistive. And besides, this girl is really nice and im sure that if she knew what i was going through she wouldnt have done this.
> 
> So I replied saying that i was just so stressed out with getting ready for the move that i hadnt even had time to think about that sort of thing.
> 
> *Heres what i wanted to say: * "Well if you must know, every moment of my life is consumed with thoughts about having a baby! I spend all day researching and on forums talking about how much i want a child. However, i'm so damn unlucky that i have PCOS, and getting pregnant will be hard for me, and staying pregnant will be even harder. I have the wonderful option of taking harmful medications that MIGHT work, or trying natural supplements that MIGHT work, seeing as there is NO CURE for my illness. Also you might like to know that i DIE a little inside everytime i see a pregnant woman, whether its on facebook or in person and i hate myself for being so jealous but i cant help it. The fact that i may not be able to give my husband a child, while little 15 year old sluts seem to be able to conceive by just SEXTING turns me into a stark raving mad lunatic!! I just dont understand!! And for another fun fact: I get so depressed and mad at my self everytime i delusionally symptom spot and take a pregnancy test just to get a BFN and be dissapointed! In fact, i cried myself to sleep last night for that very reason. Some days i really wonder how much more of this i can take, and im not even actively trying to conceive yet. And when we do start ttc it will have to be this big secret just between me and my husband because neither of our families is supportive of us having a child right now and dont seem to understand why we would have the audacity to tell them that we can make our own decisions! Just more drama to add to my life.. So in conclusion, i'm miserable, childless, miserable about being childless and possibly being doomed to a life of struggle and infertility, and sometimes i truly think that if i cant have a child that it makes me a useless human being and that i'm not worthy of being called a woman or a wife or even being alive for that matter. So thanks for asking me this insensitive question on facebook for the world to see and digging the knife in even deeper. If i kill myself tonight, you should know its because of you. But dont worry, since we're cool, i'll give you a shout out in my suicide note. Any more questions???" BITCH!!
> 
> Well i'm glad i got that off my chest :)
> 
> I teared up reading this because it's exactly how I think every damn time someone asks that ... but at the same time I laughed because I know how you feel and it would be great to see someones reaction if that is the answer they finally get .... *hugs* I am right there with you girl.Click to expand...

SAME HERE! This is exactly how I've been feeling the past few cycles as well. It's SO good to know you're not the only one thinking the same things out there!


----------



## CaliDreaming

jcombs35 said:


> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> It was too easy wasn't it? After everything, finally thinking I am no longer crazy. Now an hour later, I am back to thinking I am! How in the hell do I have 6 BFP's and get shot down so quickly by a probably cheap test from the doctor??? WTH??
> 
> :hugs::hugs::hugs: So sorry for what you're going through. I saw your post on another thread about your doctors visit, and i cant believe your doctor dismissed you like that! Theres no worse feeling than being turned away by the person you thought would be the most help to you. And yes they use the cheapest tests on the planet! :growlmad: i'm pretty sure they use the tiny rectangle tests that come with the dropper. Anyway, i hope things get better for you. Fingers crossed you get a sticky BFP soon!! :hugs::hugs::hugs: :dust:Click to expand...
> 
> It wasn't a triangle, but it was one of those cassette type things that they use a dropper with. I know because when I disputed her reading, she held it out and said, "See?" I asked about a blood test, but she said there's no reason to do one because basically I haven't even missed a period yet. I swear if this turns out to really be pregnant, I'm taking my results in and shoving them in her face!!!!!!Click to expand...

Wow. Unbelievable. I swear some people become OB/GYNs just to torture women. 

I would go back with one of my BFPs in a couple of days just to have the satisfaction of proving her wrong. Then I would find a another doctor! I wouldn't trust her.


----------



## Stake

If i get my stupid period one more time i'm going to freak out!


----------



## AlyCon

Rudolf168 said:


> SAME HERE! This is exactly how I've been feeling the past few cycles as well. It's SO good to know you're not the only one thinking the same things out there!

Yes!! Some people are so insensitive or just plain ignorant!! I swear sometimes i HATE everyone- including myself! :haha: i'm so glad for BnB otherwise i'd be driving myself even more crazy over TTC!


----------



## jcombs35

CaliDreaming said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> It was too easy wasn't it? After everything, finally thinking I am no longer crazy. Now an hour later, I am back to thinking I am! How in the hell do I have 6 BFP's and get shot down so quickly by a probably cheap test from the doctor??? WTH??
> 
> :hugs::hugs::hugs: So sorry for what you're going through. I saw your post on another thread about your doctors visit, and i cant believe your doctor dismissed you like that! Theres no worse feeling than being turned away by the person you thought would be the most help to you. And yes they use the cheapest tests on the planet! :growlmad: i'm pretty sure they use the tiny rectangle tests that come with the dropper. Anyway, i hope things get better for you. Fingers crossed you get a sticky BFP soon!! :hugs::hugs::hugs: :dust:Click to expand...
> 
> It wasn't a triangle, but it was one of those cassette type things that they use a dropper with. I know because when I disputed her reading, she held it out and said, "See?" I asked about a blood test, but she said there's no reason to do one because basically I haven't even missed a period yet. I swear if this turns out to really be pregnant, I'm taking my results in and shoving them in her face!!!!!!Click to expand...
> 
> Wow. Unbelievable. I swear some people become OB/GYNs just to torture women.
> 
> I would go back with one of my BFPs in a couple of days just to have the satisfaction of proving her wrong. Then I would find a another doctor! I wouldn't trust her.Click to expand...

Yeah someone on another post said to wait til I get a nice dark line then take it and wipe the end I peed on in her hair! haha :haha:

I'm gonna wait til I miss AF then I am indeed gonna find another doctor.


----------



## tsyhanochka

We went to visit with our friends' new baby. They said if we start now our kids would be less than a year apart... we are on cycle 9 of ttc. They got a bfp in under 3 months. They did blow one of the first times I hun out with them and now they have a baby....so unfair.


----------



## kassiaethne

*yells down at her vagina* STOP BLEEDING I COMMAND THEE


----------



## jcombs35

kassiaethne said:


> *yells down at her vagina* STOP BLEEDING I COMMAND THEE

I know just how you feel! I hope both of our bleeding stops!


----------



## laurac1988

Eurgh. Sometimes I hate spending time with sister in law. Snarky bitch. Acts like she's better than very one even though she does fuck all, is 21 years old and has never had a job.


----------



## wellsk

Hope you don't mind me sneaking over from the WTT board to have my own little rant...

To my mother; I know that you waited till you were 33 to have children, and that you were never really bothered on having them anyway. That does not mean that I am the same or prepared to wait pretty much another 11 years! I want my baby and if that's what I want, then that's what I'm going to goddamn well do!!
I'm sorry that you think that I'm making a big mistake. But I'm not a child anymore, I'm a married, house owning, bill paying, responsible adult! And I don't apprieciate being told what I want from life. Or being told I'm a 'bitch' or to 'get over it' for being jealous of all my pregnant cousins and friends (who aren't in good positions to have kids).

To myself: I really hate you, your worrying and irrationalness sometimes, I hate how jealous you are of other pregnant women, how nasty you can be about it. Even the fact that I've cried and been jealous over my best friend's pregnancy.

To pregnant women who've got healthy pregnancies (one in particular I have in mind) : Please stop whinging over how hard it is to cope with pregnancy. How you want to go on holiday, how that you can't eat or drink the things that you want, how awful morning sickness is, how tiring being pregnant is, how you can't smoke, how you're pissed off with your unborn baby because she/he is not here yet when you're only 32 weeks, how you've taken castor oil before your due date because you want your baby here early! 
I TTC/NTNP previously, and now I'm WTT. I'm never going to whinge on facebook about how bad pregnancy is, and will relish the morning sickness and all other aches and pains. Because I know what it's like to want a baby more than anything. To feel physical pain and yearning.


----------



## AlyCon

wellsk said:


> To my mother; I know that you waited till you were 33 to have children, and that you were never really bothered on having them anyway. That does not mean that I am the same or prepared to wait pretty much another 11 years! I want my baby and if that's what I want, then that's what I'm going to goddamn well do!!
> I'm sorry that you think that I'm making a big mistake. But I'm not a child anymore, I'm a married, house owning, bill paying, responsible adult! And I don't apprieciate being told what I want from life. Or being told I'm a 'bitch' or to 'get over it' for being jealous of all my pregnant cousins and friends (who aren't in good positions to have kids).

omg i'm having the same issue with my mom. She expects me to wait until im 28 to have my first child. I got married at 18. What kind of (normal, healthy) married couple waits TEN YEARS to _start_ trying. I know some do for different reasons, but its not ideal. I know its hard for moms to let go, but there comes a point where it goes from normal worrying mom to completely overbearing and over stepping their boundaries. The difference between my mom and yours is that my mom didnt wait to have kids. She got pregnant in high school and then had three more by the time she was 23 (by different men). So she wants me to "live my life" first before having kids cuz she doesnt want me to "end up like her." I dont mean to sound like a bitch but its not my fault that she got knocked by a bunch of different guys and got married and divorced a million times. And my marriage is wayy more stable than any of her THREE ever were! I just wish she would stop trying to use my life as a way to relive hers. I havent even told her that im TTC but shes coming to town soon and i might drop a hint and see what she says but i really dont want to deal with the drama. :wacko:


----------



## laurac1988

FFS! SO SICK of MIL's dinner parties. Now she's having one the day we get back from NYC. AS IF i want to go and sit and eat shit food with her while she stresses over cooking it. That's also the day of the alternative parenting show - which i want to go to. AND we need to go and get the dogs from the kennels. 

She says... "well I have been talking about it for a long time"... now.. remember that time YOU came back from holiday and we had an engagement party, and YOU didn't come because YOU were jetlagged

I really hoped we were going to be away for your stupid party


----------



## wellsk

AlyCon said:


> wellsk said:
> 
> 
> To my mother; I know that you waited till you were 33 to have children, and that you were never really bothered on having them anyway. That does not mean that I am the same or prepared to wait pretty much another 11 years! I want my baby and if that's what I want, then that's what I'm going to goddamn well do!!
> I'm sorry that you think that I'm making a big mistake. But I'm not a child anymore, I'm a married, house owning, bill paying, responsible adult! And I don't apprieciate being told what I want from life. Or being told I'm a 'bitch' or to 'get over it' for being jealous of all my pregnant cousins and friends (who aren't in good positions to have kids).
> 
> omg i'm having the same issue with my mom. She expects me to wait until im 28 to have my first child. I got married at 18. What kind of (normal, healthy) married couple waits TEN YEARS to _start_ trying. I know some do for different reasons, but its not ideal. I know its hard for moms to let go, but there comes a point where it goes from normal worrying mom to completely overbearing and over stepping their boundaries. The difference between my mom and yours is that my mom didnt wait to have kids. She got pregnant in high school and then had three more by the time she was 23 (by different men). So she wants me to "live my life" first before having kids cuz she doesnt want me to "end up like her." I dont mean to sound like a bitch but its not my fault that she got knocked by a bunch of different guys and got married and divorced a million times. And my marriage is wayy more stable than any of her THREE ever were! I just wish she would stop trying to use my life as a way to relive hers. I havent even told her that im TTC but shes coming to town soon and i might drop a hint and see what she says but i really dont want to deal with the drama. :wacko:Click to expand...

How old are you Alycon? It must be really frustrating with your mothers 'do as I say, not as I do' attitude. I get the kinda idea that she wants you to learn from her mistakes. But it's not the same, as you said, you're doing a lot better for yourself and at the end of the day. You have to learn things for yourself, rather than from others. 
My dilemma is my education really. I've got one more year on my degree, then I would like to have a baby at the end of my degree. Then after the baby has gone to school, then I'll go back and complete the masters I want to do. I could do the masters after my degree (and 2 years NHS professional position)... But that's another 4 years, and I really cannot wait that long to have children! 
But she believes I should get all my education out of the way and enjoy a few years of 'couples time' (even though we've already been married 2 years now!).

I'd advise that you don't tell your mother you're TTC and just wait until you're expecting. I wish that's what I had done, it would've saved me a lot of hassle!


----------



## laurac1988

Am at MIL. Need to go home. She's fucking me off

*rips out hair*


----------



## Rudolf168

First off - I read every single rant on here and it has helped me SO much to feel better about my own internal battles. Here are my rants:

*Myself:* Your motto has always been "everything happens for a reason", so try to live by it this time. You are 30 years old! DO NOT waste the rest of this year focusing solely on this baby-making stuff! Focus your energy on losing weight and getting healthy because that's what your future children deserve!

*DH:* Thanks for being supportive when I need it but PLEASE realize that telling me not to think about having a baby is like telling a nun to stop thinking about God. It just ain't gonna happen.

*Best Friends:* Both of you have kids. Both of you love your kids but you also both complain about them A LOT!STOP IT! BF1: I know how all 3 of your kids were accidents and that you were "fertile myrtle"....I appreciate your advice on my situation, but honestly, you don't have a CLUE what I'm going through. BF2: You do know what I'm going through and you have been very supportive and understanding...but I'm still jealous of your life and I hate myself for it! You get to be the SAHM, have two beautiful girls, loving husband, house, have a great body....and you still take meds to keep your moods up. I know we all have our issues...but you need to realize that you DO have it good and I want to be in your position!

*Co-workers who are TTC: *GET HEALTHY already. Out of the 3 of us TTC, I feel like I'm the only one making any efforts to get my body right. You guys are already going to the fertility doctors and I'm SO AFRAID I'm going to end up where you are at...and I know your health problems are caused by your lack of exercise and diet. You're not feeding your body any vitamins or nutrients. I feel like I'm making all these sacrifices and doing what I can to make things happen for me naturally...and you're just going to the fertility doctors to get a quick fix because you're unwilling to put in any of the work (mind you, I don't believe all people who go to the fertility doctor are wanting quick fixes, I just know that these ARE because they don't take the time to educate themselves about their own bodies).

*Pregnant friends:* You're too damn cute when you're pregnant and I want that SO bad! Yes I get pissed when I see your updates on Facebook, but secretly I love it because I love hearing details and feeling hopeful. But I still hate it.


----------



## AlyCon

wellsk said:


> How old are you Alycon? It must be really frustrating with your mothers 'do as I say, not as I do' attitude. I get the kinda idea that she wants you to learn from her mistakes. But it's not the same, as you said, you're doing a lot better for yourself and at the end of the day. You have to learn things for yourself, rather than from others.
> My dilemma is my education really. I've got one more year on my degree, then I would like to have a baby at the end of my degree. Then after the baby has gone to school, then I'll go back and complete the masters I want to do. I could do the masters after my degree (and 2 years NHS professional position)... But that's another 4 years, and I really cannot wait that long to have children!
> But she believes I should get all my education out of the way and enjoy a few years of 'couples time' (even though we've already been married 2 years now!).
> 
> I'd advise that you don't tell your mother you're TTC and just wait until you're expecting. I wish that's what I had done, it would've saved me a lot of hassle!

I'm 19. We just got married in December, but we've been together since 2006 when i had just turned 13. So even though we've been married a short time, we already feel like its the right time for a baby. And i have PCOS (which my mother doesnt know) so i know it may take us a while to conceive anyway, and i'd rather get started early. Also, he's getting deployed next June and i'd like to conceive quickly so he can be around for most of my pregnancy even though i know he will most likely miss the birth :cry: but i'm trying not to focus on the negatives. So as you can see i have quite a few reasons for TTC and i wish she would stop pressuring me to wait. I can see from the added stress you're under that telling my mom is probably a bad idea.. so i think i'll keep it to myself for now.

oh and congrats on getting your degree soon!! I took a few community college classes online but i'm not going back to school this upcoming semester and idk when i'll go back. I just want to focus on my marriage and TTC for now.


----------



## wellsk

Aww congratulations. I got married at 19 too! Although we'd been together since I was 17. DH is a little older than me, so.
Yeah, I don't advise telling her. I'm sure she'll be happy when it actually happens. My mother has always said how much she wants to be a grandmother, she's excited from that perspective. But is still convinced I'm way too young! :shrug:


----------



## AlyCon

She probably will be- she better be!! My sister got pregnant at 23 and although she was older, she wasnt married or even dating and for a while didnt even know who the father was!! My mom was upset at first but got over it pretty quickly and was really excited which is why i'd be so pissed of she reacted negatively to me being pregnant. Cuz if she can be happy for my sister in her situation then she damn well better be singing my praises when the time comes!! ... or else lol


----------



## tamithomas

I'm FUMING! just blocked/deleted someone from bragbook.

The person was actually serious about how the best thing that could happen is Snookie miscarrying or the baby being born stillborn. I have never been so disgusted over a view in my life. The person told me to calm down because they weren't telling me to have a miscarriage therefore I had no right to get personally offended by such a ludicrous comment.

This was coming from someone who has 2 LO of their own.

Yes Snookie has a bad rep., but that doesn't mean jack when it comes to motherhood. So disgusted, so so disgusted....


----------



## silvia710

I love this! LOL! It's nice to get stuff off your chest.

*DH's Family:* Yes, I know our son would enjoy a sibling! Yes, it's about time! We've been trying for nearly 18 months!!! Now STFU and stop making this more difficult than it already is!!!

*Dr.*: I know I'm only 25. I know there are women in their 40s whose time is "ticking" but i don't care!!! I'm paying you just as much as they are for your services, so please don't act like my sense of urgency isn't as important! I know I have "plenty of time" but I don't want my children to be so far apart!

And finally, 
*Dear Brother*: You insensitive piece of shit. You know our difficulties conceiving, and yet u still have the audacity to brag about knocking up your girlfriend twice in 3 months???!!! and then KILLING them?!! How f*cking dare you! And thanks for the offer, but we don't need any tips! You irresponsible jerk, put a condom on it!!!

Aww, that last one felt good! I didn't even tell DH about that one! 

Thanks ladies! :dust:


----------



## J_Lynn

Hey - Womens Clinic .... do you think, _maybe_, just bloody f'n _MAYBE_ you could *STOP* doing NOTHING but talking about f'n PREGNANT women!?!? 

There are PLENTY of us who are there to NOT have pregnant women RUBBED in our faces, the services you offer extend past handling the care of pregnant women. I know that society only seems to give a shit about those who easily reproduce - but really, maybe a little consideration. I literally walk in, and there are pictures of babies all over. Then there are all sorts of ads for baby stuff, your closed-circut TV show is all about the things you can do to have a better pregnancy.

I HATE YOU. SO MUCH. I go in, sit there, and get to think about babies and how great it would be to have one. And then I get to go back and hear some SHIT about how I AM BROKEN AND AM NOT NORMAL. Then get treated like some freak with the plague when I go in to get an ultrasound and since I'm not knocked up, the ultrasound tech really doesn't seem like she gives a shit to even be there. 

IT IS HURTFUL HOW YOU ISOLATE THOSE OF US WHO ARENT KNOCKED UP. IT SUCKS. Yes, it is GREAT that you treat women who are pregnant. But you also see plenty of us who ARENT, CANT, have breast cancer, and other things - no one wants to be inundated with damn newborn stuff. 

I really just almost lost it today and just started crying; it's like you're some freak walking down the halls with no bump. Everyone just eyeballing you like "why are you here?" I hate it. I just hate it.

:cry:


----------



## MelbTaurus72

So, at my husbands birthday party, his brothers gf drops the bomb that she is having her 4th child. (First with him) that means that between them, they will have SIX children and we are struggling to have one. To rub salt in the wound, she mumbled...'At least it will be born in November as we have two already in December' I wanted to slap her. I cant stand that she left her older children to shack up with the BIL and is now having her new family. I loathe her. As for the BIL, he is there being king of the kids. I HATE IT.

She gets pregnant at the drop of a hat and we have been trying for nearly 5 years and nobody cares. Every family gathering we feel left out and like misfits. It's a club that is exclusive and OBVIOUSLY as we don't have kids, we know nothing about them. Forget the fact that I have been a junior school teacher for a million years. I MIGHT have picked up on a few things over the years.

I AM SICK OF BEING LEFT OUT/EXCLUDED.


----------



## HWPG

kassiaethne said:


> *yells down at her vagina* STOP BLEEDING I COMMAND THEE

this is the funniest vent on this thread - love!


----------



## HWPG

just read ALL the vents and i'm so happy to have found this page. i cant respond to all the ones i agree with, but it's so nice to see some of my thoughts on here already.
here is my vent: to anyone who says, "just wait til you have a baby, you wont be able to (insert event, such as eating dinner at 8p, going away for a weekend, spontaneously having sex in the afternoon, etc and whatever)" - i can't WAIT for the day when my life involves a child and look forward to a time when i have dinner at 6, bath at 7, bedtime at 8p. Because right now, i spend all my evenings online venting ;)


----------



## Odi

This is not really a vent...:nope: more like a "need to get it off my chest" 

:sad2:

I have spent so much time dreaming of our baby's face.. His beatiful eyes, just like his daddy, wee mouth, perfect, the best of the two of us together in one perfect little package.. I even have his name in my mind..

Cancer has taken it away from us..DP, i love you so very much.. I wish that there was something I could do to fix this.. i feel so fuckin helpless..

Friends and Family - dont give me the "everything happens for a reason" line.. bullshit everything happens for a reason! :growlmad:

Time to put the Clomid away :cry: feel like i need to let this one go..


----------



## hunni12

Odi said:


> This is not really a vent...:nope: more like a "need to get it off my chest"
> 
> :sad2:
> 
> I have spent so much time dreaming of our baby's face.. His beatiful eyes, just like his daddy, wee mouth, perfect, the best of the two of us together in one perfect little package.. I even have his name in my mind..
> 
> Cancer has taken it away from us..DP, i love you so very much.. I wish that there was something I could do to fix this.. i feel so fuckin helpless..
> 
> Friends and Family - dont give me the "everything happens for a reason" line.. bullshit everything happens for a reason! :growlmad:
> 
> Time to put the Clomid away :cry: feel like i need to let this one go..

I'm sorry to hear of your troubles hun:hugs:


----------



## laustiredttc

HWPG said:


> kassiaethne said:
> 
> 
> *yells down at her vagina* STOP BLEEDING I COMMAND THEE
> 
> this is the funniest vent on this thread - love!Click to expand...

:rofl: awesome just bloody awesome lol

to my lovely mother: you dont get it and saying it will hapeen when it happens is not making it any easier for me.
to my dh: thank you for supporting me in your own strange male way.
To my friends with all their children: Don't give me the damn pitty faces because i don't frickin need them
To my brothers infuriating gf: if you didnt want to get pg then you should have used the condom now FO and don't even try to speak to me as if you know what i'm going through. Little rat!!!
To the doctors who look bored: Oh i'm sorry are there more important patients than me you need to see to. I get it i'm just a fuc*$% number to you and you don't really care that its been 13 months OF SHEER HELL!!
To my body: please just do the damn job you were meant to do and stop fucking everything in my life up!!

Ok rant over, now looking forward to nice glass of :wine:

Cheers for the vent thread, feel alot better :thumbup:


----------



## laurac1988

Odi said:


> This is not really a vent...:nope: more like a "need to get it off my chest"
> 
> :sad2:
> 
> I have spent so much time dreaming of our baby's face.. His beatiful eyes, just like his daddy, wee mouth, perfect, the best of the two of us together in one perfect little package.. I even have his name in my mind..
> 
> Cancer has taken it away from us..DP, i love you so very much.. I wish that there was something I could do to fix this.. i feel so fuckin helpless..
> 
> Friends and Family - dont give me the "everything happens for a reason" line.. bullshit everything happens for a reason! :growlmad:
> 
> Time to put the Clomid away :cry: feel like i need to let this one go..

So sorry to hear xxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## tamithomas

just had my first "why don't inferitles just adopt, it's a win win situation" discussion.. my head imploded, but surprisingly i had people who backed me up on it. People dealing with infertility are calling out those who don't see what it is for what it is more and more. 

Wanted to punch that same woman because earlier in the discussion we were talking about overshare on bragbook and she said "there are a lot of people on my list trying to lose weight...so I shouldn't talk about yummy food? Not trying to be insensitive, but just saying, man...that's a crap way to live." like really? you're gonna compare weight loss which involves just putting down the fork and running vs infertility, oh did you forget to mention you got LO's of your own? piss off. She got ripped apart for that one by a few of us (not here on B&B btw)


----------



## laurac1988

I really REALLY hate it when people plonk themselves down on the sofa next to you in Starbucks without asking if anyone is sitting there. Then look all offended when you say "oh... Sorry someone is sitting there"... 

Especially when there's About 800 other seats to choose from!


----------



## wellsk

laurac1988 said:


> I really REALLY hate it when people plonk themselves down on the sofa next to you in Starbucks without asking if anyone is sitting there. Then look all offended when you say "oh... Sorry someone is sitting there"...
> 
> Especially when there's About 800 other seats to choose from!

How rude! I'd be like 'err, what do you think you're doing? Get up!'. In my local Starbucks the sofas are next to the window. And if you even hint at moving from the chairs. There's someone already putting their bags down trying to push you out of the way!!

My rant for today is the woman I was whinging about the other day. She's overdue by a couple of days now. And she has bitched and moaned since 32 weeks about how she's trying to get baby out! Well today, she's in A&E/ER and she's complaining on Facebook how there are children in there playing in the play area. Saying that their parents are lazy because there's nothing wrong with their child. And how it's a waste of resources!
What a bitch! 
It's like, I'm sorry, I didn't realise you were a medical genius, with x ray eyes who can see the problem with other peoples children.
And so in a few weeks, when they've got a poorly newborn or something, how would they feel if someone was complaining that they were wasting the doctors time?!


----------



## tamithomas

Sore BB's right on time..grrrr sometimes I wish my symptoms were not so prominent and stand out 6 days before AF because it makes the 2nd week of TWW so fecking long! Plus, DH doesn't understand why I'm so moody. I'm so tired of the 2nd week of TWW, why can't I just be pregnant already? :cry: so fed up of my cousins being on the 2nd BFP's, my SIL who is on welfare even has a baby. So fed up of it being everyone else but me!!!!!!!!


----------



## mummybuns

My vent was obviously disallowed:wacko::wacko:.... I spent a while writing it last night, posted then was told it would be reviewed before being posted... It hasn't appeared so far...Was it really that bad?! A few swear words but that's it!
I thought we were allowed to say what we want on this thread?!!


----------



## tamithomas

mummybuns said:


> My vent was obviously disallowed:wacko::wacko:.... I spent a while writing it last night, posted then was told it would be reviewed before being posted... It hasn't appeared so far...Was it really that bad?! A few swear words but that's it!
> I thought we were allowed to say what we want on this thread?!!

That's why i always replace one letter from swear words such as fecking, or b**ch to make sure it doesn't get alarmed for it.


----------



## HWPG

todays vent: why do stores put tampons and baby items in the same aisle? hey, while i try not to cry as i go buy tampons (again), why don't you put bibs and bottles and pacifiers in my face? perfect floor planning, morons.


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## pinksprinkles

Oh, yay. Another FB pregnancy announcement. This time from I guy I went to HS with. This man dropped out of school so that he could spend more time becoming a "backyard wrestler" and drinking. His best friend at the time got high and stabbed a girl once. Complicated reasons keep him on my friend's list. 

QUOTE: "well everyone im gonna be a daddy again, yay me but its time for me to get ma balls snipped lmao". Responses include: "dude nice congrats u never gona get all them kids out the house y u young lmao" and "WELL U R NOT ALONE MY SON SAID NO MORE FO HIM EITHER AFTER 3 THAT WE KNOW OF HERE...LOL" as well as "F*ck that", "Holy sh*t", and "Congratz brutha!"

Why do people like this get child after child yet my husband and I are having to deal with doctors, lab work, and medications just to hopefully have one???? Makes me sick.


----------



## teako22

To my cousin: I am happy you have become a surrogate mother today for a very deserving couple who cannot concieve on their own. It is admirable but please stop posting step by step updates. You know we have been trying 4+ years. The fact that your so fertile you can carry other peoples babies is not something that I want to be reminded of constantly.


----------



## dizzy65

im so ridiculously tired of hearing about people accidently getting pregnant and that the FOB doesnt want anything to do with them and that they dont want the baby its called stfu and stop having sex gee wiz!


----------



## jcombs35

pinksprinkles said:


> Oh, yay. Another FB pregnancy announcement. This time from I guy I went to HS with. This man dropped out of school so that he could spend more time becoming a "backyard wrestler" and drinking. His best friend at the time got high and stabbed a girl once. Complicated reasons keep him on my friend's list.
> 
> QUOTE: "well everyone im gonna be a daddy again, yay me but its time for me to get ma balls snipped lmao". Responses include: "dude nice congrats u never gona get all them kids out the house y u young lmao" and "WELL U R NOT ALONE MY SON SAID NO MORE FO HIM EITHER AFTER 3 THAT WE KNOW OF HERE...LOL" as well as "F*ck that", "Holy sh*t", and "Congratz brutha!"
> 
> Why do people like this get child after child yet my husband and I are having to deal with doctors, lab work, and medications just to hopefully have one???? Makes me sick.

Some people are idiots. I have never understood why people think of children as inconveniences or burdens. We are ttc#4, and conceiving has never been easy for us. At the time, I just wasn't trying as hard because I was younger. Now that we're trying for number 4, people are always saying, "Oh no!" when I think I might get a BFP, or "Shew!" when I get a BFN. I want to smack these people!

It's a baby, a child, a _*LIFE*_... it's not life threatening cancer! I know most people only want 2.5 children, and want to wait til they're 40 to have them, but I started young, and I want a big family! Sorry... that turned into my own rant...

But I do understand. It seems like people who are horrible parents and people who don't even want children have the easiest time having them!! :hugs:


----------



## laurac1988

Dear parent at bus stop. When I hear you say to your child "you better f***ing behave or you're going to get f***ed. I'm sick of you". Before lighting up a cigarette and promptly smoking all over three gorgeous boys... It makes me sad I can't have children at the moment.

F*ck you


----------



## laurac1988

Hey Transport for London. If a train doesn't exist, dont list it on your website. That way I don't come out early and sit around in the station for 20 minutes like a doofus, for no good reason! This is why the transport system won't cope with the games, because transport for London couldn't organise their way out of a paper bag.
Grrrr

Also, work. When I do overtime, please pay me for it. Bad enough that I've had to wait over a month for it anyway, but you've now not paid me it and I can't book my broadway tickets. So, thank you so much for not doing a favour for me after I've done one for you. SIX overtime shifts I did last month at a total of 72 hours out of my life and no pay. *not impressed* if I don't get tickets for the shows I want I will be SO ANNOYED! I didn't work 72 hours of overtime for the good of my health


----------



## BabyKayKay

Dear Mother of a child I watch occasionally,

please do not tell me I am "lucky" not to have children, and how grateful I should be to know I can sleep in. Please. 6am is not sleeping in, number one. Number two, I don't believe it's "lucky" that I have fertility issues. 
How insensitive.


----------



## laustiredttc

Odi said:


> This is not really a vent...:nope: more like a "need to get it off my chest"
> 
> :sad2:
> 
> I have spent so much time dreaming of our baby's face.. His beatiful eyes, just like his daddy, wee mouth, perfect, the best of the two of us together in one perfect little package.. I even have his name in my mind..
> 
> Cancer has taken it away from us..DP, i love you so very much.. I wish that there was something I could do to fix this.. i feel so fuckin helpless..
> 
> Friends and Family - dont give me the "everything happens for a reason" line.. bullshit everything happens for a reason! :growlmad:
> 
> Time to put the Clomid away :cry: feel like i need to let this one go..[/QUOTE
> 
> I'm so sorry to hear hun, sending you :hugs:


----------



## jcombs35

Really looking like another chemical. I am so sick of trying. I'm sick of cm, I'm sick of poas, and I'm sick of AF. Why can't I just decide I want a baby, bd, and end up with one after 9 months? Why won't it "take?"


----------



## wellsk

jcombs35 said:


> Really looking like another chemical. I am so sick of trying. I'm sick of cm, I'm sick of poas, and I'm sick of AF. Why can't I just decide I want a baby, bd, and end up with one after 9 months? Why won't it "take?"

I'm really sorry jcombs :hugs:


----------



## laustiredttc

jcombs35 said:


> Really looking like another chemical. I am so sick of trying. I'm sick of cm, I'm sick of poas, and I'm sick of AF. Why can't I just decide I want a baby, bd, and end up with one after 9 months? Why won't it "take?"

i'm so so sorry to hear that hun. I cant imagine what your going through :hugs:

Please don't want to kill me for saying this but the saying, 'the things we work the hardest for are the most rewarding'! keeps me going sometimes. i'm 13 cycles in and still hoping for that first :bfp: but know what its like to keep trying and nothing. I'm still going to keep trying for as long as it takes. I hope that you get your :bfp: wish hun and soon the the little bean sticks.


----------



## CaliDreaming

jcombs35 said:


> Really looking like another chemical. I am so sick of trying. I'm sick of cm, I'm sick of poas, and I'm sick of AF. Why can't I just decide I want a baby, bd, and end up with one after 9 months? Why won't it "take?"

So sorry jcombs35. :hugs::hugs:


----------



## jcombs35

laustiredttc said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> Really looking like another chemical. I am so sick of trying. I'm sick of cm, I'm sick of poas, and I'm sick of AF. Why can't I just decide I want a baby, bd, and end up with one after 9 months? Why won't it "take?"
> 
> i'm so so sorry to hear that hun. I cant imagine what your going through :hugs:
> 
> Please don't want to kill me for saying this but the saying, 'the things we work the hardest for are the most rewarding'! keeps me going sometimes. i'm 13 cycles in and still hoping for that first :bfp: but know what its like to keep trying and nothing. I'm still going to keep trying for as long as it takes. I hope that you get your :bfp: wish hun and soon the the little bean sticks.Click to expand...

Of course I don't want to kill you for saying it. There's not really anything any one can say to make this any easier, unless it's, "Hey. I know for sure that you didn't just have a chemical." And have it be true.

I just don't get it. As many others point out, why is it druggies and teenagers seem to have no problem having child after child and have to depend on welfare to take care of them?

(I'm not saying all teenagers are horrible parents or all teenagers live off welfare. I had my first one at 19. I'm just saying it usually isn't an ideal time to get pregnant.)

And yet here I sit, have been married for 10 years and have worked hard to make a loving home for my family, and I have to try so so hard to make a pregnancy stick? Yes I do have three, but they didn't come easily. And whether you're trying for number 1 or trying for number 10, if you want to get pregnant and can't, it's horrible.


----------



## wellsk

laustiredttc said:


> i'm so so sorry to hear that hun. I cant imagine what your going through :hugs:
> 
> Please don't want to kill me for saying this but the saying, *'the things we work the hardest for are the most rewarding'*! keeps me going sometimes. i'm 13 cycles in and still hoping for that first :bfp: but know what its like to keep trying and nothing. I'm still going to keep trying for as long as it takes. I hope that you get your :bfp: wish hun and soon the the little bean sticks.

I agree in a way, I think that we will apprieciate every little twinge of morning sickness, every sleepless night, every moment of backache. Knowing that one day our little one will be with us. Because it has not come easy.


----------



## CaliDreaming

wellsk said:


> laustiredttc said:
> 
> 
> i'm so so sorry to hear that hun. I cant imagine what your going through :hugs:
> 
> Please don't want to kill me for saying this but the saying, *'the things we work the hardest for are the most rewarding'*! keeps me going sometimes. i'm 13 cycles in and still hoping for that first :bfp: but know what its like to keep trying and nothing. I'm still going to keep trying for as long as it takes. I hope that you get your :bfp: wish hun and soon the the little bean sticks.
> 
> I agree in a way, I think that we will apprieciate every little twinge of morning sickness, every sleepless night, every moment of backache. Knowing that one day our little one will be with us. Because it has not come easy.Click to expand...

This is so true. When you have to struggle to conceive, you take nothing for granted.

I have a cousin who is extremely fertile. When she got pregnant with her third baby, she announced her pregnancy the day after she took the test. It must be such a blissful ignorance to be able to get pregnant whenever you want and never have to fear that anything is going to go wrong.


----------



## jcombs35

wellsk said:


> laustiredttc said:
> 
> 
> i'm so so sorry to hear that hun. I cant imagine what your going through :hugs:
> 
> Please don't want to kill me for saying this but the saying, *'the things we work the hardest for are the most rewarding'*! keeps me going sometimes. i'm 13 cycles in and still hoping for that first :bfp: but know what its like to keep trying and nothing. I'm still going to keep trying for as long as it takes. I hope that you get your :bfp: wish hun and soon the the little bean sticks.
> 
> I agree in a way, I think that we will apprieciate every little twinge of morning sickness, every sleepless night, every moment of backache. Knowing that one day our little one will be with us. Because it has not come easy.Click to expand...

I also agree. It's just hard to appreciate it right now.


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## laustiredttc

Wow, oh to be that fertile :cloud9: 

wellsk i have been wishing and praying for all of those symptoms, to know that every bit of it would be worth it in the end. At least we have comfort in the knowledge we're not alone :)


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## wellsk

hugs to everyone! :hugs:
It's so cruel sometimes, it just seems that everyone who isn't really bothered about having children or doesn't care can get pregnant at the drop of a hat.
Whereas we would give our left arm to have children, but no, it's just 'tough' for us :(
At the moment I'm WTT after TTC with no luck. It's certainly taken some pressure off, and although I'm looking forward to TTC again. I'm terrified of more BFN, because it absolutely destroyed me last time :nope:


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## wellsk

laustiredttc, exactly! :hugs:
It tears me up inside when I hear people whinging about being uncomfortable and having morning sickness, not being able to drink and smoke etc. Theres been 2 posts I've read in the last few minutes that included some of these things...
And it's just like, you have no idea what it's like to be in pain. I was wrecked emotionally, I would sit and cry for days. Grieving for the hopes and dreams that this month would be the month, for the baby that existed in my mind.
Sigh.


----------



## jcombs35

I can relate to you both. All I've ever wanted from the time I was 4 years old was to get married and have a huge family. It took 3 years and a m/c to even get one! Then you have to submerse yourself into society, where you hear about people getting preggo just by getting looked at the wrong way, are able to announce it early on because of course it will stick, and then hear them complaining about how awful it is.


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## laustiredttc

I do hate it when someone says something like, 'oh huni, it's just not your time yet'. That absolutely grates on me. I feel like saying, 'ok all great and powerful knowing one, tell me when its my time then'? Just pis%*& me off. I think after 13 cycles maybe my time might have been in there somewhere. Especially when i have done blooming eveything, even the supposedly brilliant "not trying" approach. I just wish they would educate people more about ttc and the hardships that women and their partners have to face. Maybe people would'nt be so damn ignorant then!!

Sorry girls had to let that one fly, getting a bit stuffy in the room with all this pent up emotion!


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## jcombs35

laustiredttc said:


> *I do hate it when someone says something like, 'oh huni, it's just not your time yet'. That absolutely grates on me. I feel like saying, 'ok all great and powerful knowing one, tell me when its my time then'? *Just pis%*& me off. I think after 13 cycles maybe my time might have been in there somewhere. Especially when i have done blooming eveything, even the supposedly brilliant "not trying" approach. I just wish they would educate people more about ttc and the hardships that women and their partners have to face. Maybe people would'nt be so damn ignorant then!!
> 
> Sorry girls had to let that one fly, getting a bit stuffy in the room with all this pent up emotion!

I know it! After I skipped AF in June, and really thought I was, I got AF in July. :hissy: And my stupid BIL tells me what a blessing it is that I got it. There were a ton of other family members around so I had to be "polite" but I wanted to throw him over the side of the mountain I live on. Yes, it sure is a blessing to want a baby more than anything else in the world and to have all your hopes and dreams come gushing out of you like a flood. Yes, what a blessing that was.


----------



## wellsk

That's alright :hugs: that is what this thread is here for.
It's like my SIL (don't get me wrong, I absolutely love her to pieces), but a couple of months ago a friend asked when me and DH were gonna were gonna have a baby (we were TTC at the time), I have never said anything to anyone so kinda just said that I wasn't sure yet. And my SIL said 'don't be silly, she's so young! They won't want kids yet!'...
And although I didn't say anything, I just kinda like, I'm sorry? Just because I'm young doesn't mean that I don't want kids now. And whats worse is the fact that everyone always seems to say 'you're young, you've got plenty of time'...
It's like, okay, so you're saying that my inability to concieve is somehow less worse because I've got much longer to try? 
It's just as agonising for me as it is for anyone else, my age has got nothing to do with it!


----------



## wellsk

jcombs35 said:


> I know it! After I skipped AF in June, and really thought I was, I got AF in July. :hissy: And my stupid BIL tells me what a blessing it is that I got it. There were a ton of other family members around so I had to be "polite" but I wanted to throw him over the side of the mountain I live on. Yes, it sure is a blessing to want a baby more than anything else in the world and to have all your hopes and dreams come gushing out of you like a flood. Yes, what a blessing that was.

Whattt?! Why on earth is that a blessing!? I would've given him a mouthful, and maybe a slap... whether there was a roomful of people or not!


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## jcombs35

Because he thought for us having another baby would be so awful or something. Everything in me wanted to completely go off on him, but I held it together. I swear just because some people don't have kids and don't want kids, they think everyone else doesn't either. Yes, it would be bad if _he _got someone pregnant. He has no job, no home, no anything. He goes from place to place staying with people. I'm sure he wouldn't want to hear that someone was pregnant with his child. But our situation is entirely different, and we _want _another one!


----------



## tamithomas

Dear religious people, please stop telling me "it's gods plan, just trust in him and he will provide" not everyone is religious and if anything IF has given me another reason not to be a believer! (no offence to those who are)


----------



## wellsk

Ahh, we had one of those last night on the WTT forum, telling women who'd had a misscarriage that it was God's will. And because they didn't believe they won't get pregnant, or they will only miscarry. 
How twisted do you have to be to believe something like that?!


----------



## jcombs35

I am a Christian, and it makes me mad when other people claiming to be Christians talk like that. I don't believe it is ever "God's will" for a life to be lost, no matter how early on. Once a little one is conceived, it has a soul. Some things just happen. Things go wrong with our timing, with our hormones, with our bodies, and it's not something God wants. No, I can't explain why God lets it happen. While contemplating my own possible chemical, I'm thinking if it is due to severe abnormalities, then it probably is better. And I don't mean 6 toes abnormalities, I mean, no heart or brain development, or something very severe. Regardless of why, it doesn't make it hurt any less. I'm sorry someone said that to you.


----------



## layla23

Im sick of everyone telling me that i am infertile because "you work out too much, stop exercising and maybe you will get your period and start ovulating"!! I have NO idea what is going on with my body, I was on the pill for so long that I think my body is just still trying to hormonally adjust so everyone just back off. And my sister in law is pregnant and all she cares about during family events is attention about her baby bump, we know you are pregnant stop complaining and acting like you are in such misery! You should be happy you have a baby bump!


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## wellsk

Jcombs, as hard as it is to accept, you're probably right. I think it is normally to do with severe abnormalities, where the baby would not be able to survive growing or as a newborn. It is extremely sad, and I have so much sympathy for anyone going through it. But I think I would think that for me and my child, it would be better that way than them being born and being in pain or have serious suffering :(


----------



## jcombs35

wellsk said:


> Jcombs, as hard as it is to accept, you're probably right. I think it is normally to do with severe abnormalities, where the baby would not be able to survive growing or as a newborn. It is extremely sad, and I have so much sympathy for anyone going through it. But I think I would think that for me and my child, it would be better that way than them being born and being in pain or have serious suffering :(

That's exactly what I meant. I know it breaks my heart to see my kids hurt in any way. Having my sons circumcised was heart wrenching for me. I don't think I could bear (bare) SP? having a child who was constantly suffering. This way of thinking helps slightly when going through the "why?" stages. But I would never go so far as to tell someone it was God's will or that it was for the best. :hugs:


----------



## tamithomas

It's just annoying to see the diehard Christians use your weakness such as opening up about IF as a way to sneak in recruitment for the church. I got no problem with religion, if anything I'm related to Brother Andre who is a saint at the Vadican but not every moment of weakness should be used as a way to pull people in. Again, the comment was only dirrected at the diehard christians not religious people in general :hugs:


----------



## jcombs35

Well, as Christians, we are supposed to spread the gospel. Some people however take this to mean they should judge people or make them feel inferior, which is very wrong.


----------



## wellsk

tamithomas said:


> It's just annoying to see the diehard Christians use your weakness such as opening up about IF as a way to sneak in recruitment for the church. I got no problem with religion, if anything I'm related to Brother Andre who is a saint at the Vadican but not every moment of weakness should be used as a way to pull people in. Again, the comment was only dirrected at the diehard christians not religious people in general :hugs:




jcombs35 said:


> Well, as Christians, we are supposed to spread the gospel. Some people however take this to mean they should judge people or make them feel inferior, which is very wrong.


I couldn't have described it better myself! :hugs:


----------



## HWPG

vent for today: :)
to my current bras: please hold out a little longer. i dont want to buy new ones, because i'm *positive* any day now i'm going to have sore boobs and they are going to grow and i'm going to need maternity/nursing bras. it's going to happen. so i'm not spending $$ on new ones. PS. dear bra makers, why the hell do you make your garments so expensive? i hate you.


----------



## J_Lynn

Dear DHs ex-wife (and I use that term loosely, because you're the biggest skank I've ever heard of): Stop meddling in our life. I know you're bitter that he divorced you - but it's been 6 years. And you're remarried now. Get over it. I know that you were together for 15 years, but you clearly had to know that your little game would end eventually when at 15 years old you were already cheating on him. It's just sad it took him till he was 29 to find out about it. You're disgusting, and no one in this house likes you. Well, your kids do - but I really don't know how thats possible since you refuse to spend any money on anything but your horses and the only reason they even eat when they're with you is because of their nana. 
I hate you, and if you got hit by a bus tomorrow - I would throw a party. Trust me, that's the truth - I already have the invitations and guest list planned out. This whole town is invited ... because we all hate you. You're a thief, a liar, a wh*re, and a horrible person on every other level. 

Oh, by the way - your husband is sleeping with your best friend - which is poetic justice, if I do say so myself. Everyone knows it but you - which makes it all that much more funny. 

And thanks for telling the girls that when we have a kid, daddy wont love them anymore and the best thing that could happen to me is to lose the baby. You had two miscarriages yourself, and only had children because your mom told you the only way to secure your place in life is to make sure you marry him and have his kid so if you don't get his families money when his grandma dies you'll at least be guaranteed child support (haha .. that little plan backfired, didn't it? You didn't plan on him gettng majority custody because youre a failure at life) - so even you being the most cold-hearted, bitter, hateful person the planet has to be hurt a little bit when you lost your babies. Even though you hate children and never wanted them in the first place, that had to hurt ... so why woudl you EVER wish that on someone? You make me sick. 

xoxo

PS - Please stop telling the girls that you're going to be taking them on world-wide trips and luxury vacations because you're going to be making $10k a month with World Ventures. You've been doing that crap for 7 months, have yet to make any money and having them come back to us every-other week talking about how they're going to spend their summers in exotic locations is driving me nuts because we all know that you can't even hold a full time job (which is why your house has been 1-step away from foreclosure since you bought it 5 years ago) and stay focused on anything but horses for long enough to succeed in anything - especially 'get rich quick' schemes. 






That was really long, but seriously - I feel like I just dropped 100lbs off my shoulders. I have been needing to vent about her for the last year, and this is just .... wonderful.


----------



## HWPG

hi again,
so the Christian vent really touched a nerve with me, and i thought about posting or not, but in the end, it is a "vent thread", so here it is:
i was raised very Christian. After marriage and finding out my (now ex) husband was sterile (zero sperm), i was told by my pastor: 1) i could still have children in my life, you know, like being a teacher. 2) his wife had cancer, and he didnt leave her after her diagnosis, so i shouldnt leave my ex. 3) his wife had a miscarriage, so he understands. And 4) it was God's will. I cannot tell you in words how these words made me feel: devastated, humiliated, and empty do not begin it. i truly believe in alternative forms of family (via sperm donor or adoption for example). My ex had made the decision that "if he could not have biological children, we didnt need children at all in our life". THAT is why i left him. My pastors wife was TREATED for her cancer, while my husband would not consider treatment for his disorder. And she had a m/c, and then 2 healthy children - we could have NONE. At 12 years old i knew i wanted to be a mom, maybe even before that. I still want to hold a child, raise a child, hear a child call me mommy - and for me personally, the biology doenst matter. So while Ex being sterile may have been God's will, no one can ever tell me that denying me motherhood was His will. So yea, i left the hubby, and i left that church. I'm sorry it was long, but it's SO GOOD to finally say these words "outloud", because i will never able to say them to who they should go to. *sigh* (feels better)


----------



## tamithomas

HWPG said:


> hi again,
> so the Christian vent really touched a nerve with me, and i thought about posting or not, but in the end, it is a "vent thread", so here it is:
> i was raised very Christian. After marriage and finding out my (now ex) husband was sterile (zero sperm), i was told by my pastor: 1) i could still have children in my life, you know, like being a teacher. 2) his wife had cancer, and he didnt leave her after her diagnosis, so i shouldnt leave my ex. 3) his wife had a miscarriage, so he understands. And 4) it was God's will. I cannot tell you in words how these words made me feel: devastated, humiliated, and empty do not begin it. i truly believe in alternative forms of family (via sperm donor or adoption for example). My ex had made the decision that "if he could not have biological children, we didnt need children at all in our life". THAT is why i left him. My pastors wife was TREATED for her cancer, while my husband would not consider treatment for his disorder. And she had a m/c, and then 2 healthy children - we could have NONE. At 12 years old i knew i wanted to be a mom, maybe even before that. I still want to hold a child, raise a child, hear a child call me mommy - and for me personally, the biology doenst matter. So while Ex being sterile may have been God's will, no one can ever tell me that denying me motherhood was His will. So yea, i left the hubby, and i left that church. I'm sorry it was long, but it's SO GOOD to finally say these words "outloud", because i will never able to say them to who they should go to. *sigh* (feels better)

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:


----------



## laustiredttc

HW, well said and well done for saying it :thumbup:


----------



## pinksprinkles

HWPG-

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

I'm glad you got yourself out of that. You DO deserve to have children!


----------



## tamithomas

vent: Whoever inforced the concept that women are forced to wear undergarments, i hate you. my BB's hurt so much and are sore to the touch with AF due in 4 days. If I could I would burn all of my bras.


----------



## wellsk

:hugs: I can sympathise. It's really painful just before AF. Have you tried wearing sports bras? I tend to find them less harsh on the boobies! :haha:


----------



## laurac1988

my cousin had her sixth child today. he is gorgeous. Her kids have six different dads. She has this one for a bigger council house. She does nothing but drink, smoke and have sex. 

I don't drink... I don't smoke... i work hard for a living... and I'm in a committed relationship. 

Where's the fairness?!


----------



## jcombs35

To my cousin. STOP posting things like everything is a big riddle, like you've got so much going on in your life that you just can't say much about. Some of us really have serious things going on that we would love to share with everyone, but just can't. Really, you're a medical assistant student, and thinking of getting a job at a hospital? Yes, whatever you do, don't say it on facebook. Send everyone messages.... What? You are interested in a guy? Wouldn't want everyone to know that, even though they don't know him. Send us a message! 

This just really bothers me. I've even mentioned it to her. She leaves these vague posts that more often than not worry most of us, and then she sends a message saying what is really going on, and it's like, "Why couldn't you just post that?" I have things I want to say so badly. If it weren't for some of the wonderful ladies on this site, I would be completely alone. Yet, I long to share my problems with my family and friends, but I just can't. :trouble:


----------



## HWPG

to my best friend: i know it's 1 more week until your period, and if you are pregnant after 1 month of NPNT, i will still be SO happy for you, but life is so unfair. i'm dreading her phone call....


----------



## laustiredttc

hey hw if you get that call, im here hun. and you are entitled to a massive vent!!! :hugs:


----------



## HWPG

to a manager at my work (in my group and i have to work with him, but dont report to him): you are a douchebag who cannot do your job. you plan studies that I have to run with no regard to how it effects (affects? i always get that wrong) my life. i do NOT want to be in Texas over Labor Day. i do NOT want to be in Texas while i'm ovulating. i do NOT want to be told 1 week before the study begins that i have to travel. it's called "planning" - everyone else has to do it, why dont you try it? it's called "consideration" - how about you ask ME what works for my schedule? i'm not a bitch, i will compromise, but at least check with me. i hate your passive-aggressive-ness and your pissy attitude when i call you out on it. Ask your wife for your balls back. Or at least get your act together and include me in the decision making. I feel a little bad, but mostly not: you're going to get a bad review this year. Just giving you a heads up.
sorry this wasnt too baby related, but since we're all counting days and checking the calendar, i felt i could rant about traveling for work and how, when asked what time works best, it's hard to say, "i hope i'm ovulating this day, so the week after would be better"


----------



## littlefishygg

Dear OH come home!!!! He is away working all summer and I can't literally feel my biological clock ticking


----------



## Aliciatm

Dear husbands friend and wife I'm so happy that you guys told us before most of ur other friends that u guys were expecting but to rub it in our faces that you guys are so fertile that u were just trying for a few weeks then bam isn't very nice I've struggled with infertility for over 5 years and yes I'm happy for u but please be respectful to the fact tht I want what u have and id give everything I could up for it...


----------



## jcombs35

HWPG said:


> to a manager at my work (in my group and i have to work with him, but dont report to him): you are a douchebag who cannot do your job. you plan studies that I have to run with no regard to how it effects (affects? i always get that wrong) my life. i do NOT want to be in Texas over Labor Day. i do NOT want to be in Texas while i'm ovulating. i do NOT want to be told 1 week before the study begins that i have to travel. it's called "planning" - everyone else has to do it, why dont you try it? it's called "consideration" - how about you ask ME what works for my schedule? i'm not a bitch, i will compromise, but at least check with me. i hate your passive-aggressive-ness and your pissy attitude when i call you out on it. Ask your wife for your balls back. Or at least get your act together and include me in the decision making. I feel a little bad, but mostly not: you're going to get a bad review this year. Just giving you a heads up.
> sorry this wasnt too baby related, but since we're all counting days and checking the calendar, i felt i could rant about traveling for work and how, when asked what time works best, it's hard to say, "i hope i'm ovulating this day, so the week after would be better"

I just posted a rant that had nothing to do with babies. Sometimes our hormones make other things get on our nerves too!!


----------



## tamithomas

Dear OH: When i tell you my BB's are hurting and I'm due in 3 days, stop with the false hope. I'm already having a hard enough time accepting we're out this month, I don't need someone in denial.


----------



## tamithomas

HWPG said:


> to my best friend: i know it's 1 more week until your period, and if you are pregnant after 1 month of NPNT, i will still be SO happy for you, but life is so unfair. i'm dreading her phone call....

if there is indeed a BFP, we're all here for you to listen. rant away as much as you like. We've all been there,sadly my friends make sure its in a public place so they know i cant react :growlmad:..... :hugs:


----------



## Gunnhilde

We aren't going back to TTC until December, but OH please stop assuming we can plan for sure when we are going to get pregnant and that there won't be any problems with it. You are driving me nuts!

Mom, OH's mom and dad - I don't care if you think it is too soon. I'll be almost 26 and DF will be 27! Do you think we have forever to have children? I know you waited until you were 35 mom, but I'm not you and I had my first at 21 already! OH's parents - you had yours at 19 and 22, so you should have some sense of understanding. :growlmad: Also, I don't care that you guys waiting 14 years to get married, we're not and I don't care that it makes you uncomfortable that DF and I won't be living together before marriage. Deal with it.

:icecream: That felt good.


----------



## MHallman

tamithomas said:


> Dear OH: When i tell you my BB's are hurting and I'm due in 3 days, stop with the false hope. I'm already having a hard enough time accepting we're out this month, I don't need someone in denial.

Thank you for this! My OH does the same thing and it is so annoying. Atleast have a little hope and be a little happy. He says he's a "realist" he can't just lie to himself... yeah right!


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## kassiaethne

why do people think it is helpful to comment on why I had my miscarriage??? like telling me I was to stressed really helps ME feel better about it all? like if I had been less stressed and done things right instead of sleeping on the floor for a couple days I would be having my baby next month. thank you, that has made me feel SO much better about the whole thing, please tell me now the reason puppies die is because I sneeze to much


----------



## jcombs35

Hey Kass! Haven't seen you in a while. Everything okay?


----------



## wellsk

Aww Kass :hugs:
That's so awful, insensitive and ignorant of those people! They don't know why you or anyone else had a miscarriage. Their not doctors or psychic! Stupid thoughtless people.
I'm so sorry sweet!


----------



## tamithomas

kassiaethne said:


> why do people think it is helpful to comment on why I had my miscarriage??? like telling me I was to stressed really helps ME feel better about it all? like if I had been less stressed and done things right instead of sleeping on the floor for a couple days I would be having my baby next month. thank you, that has made me feel SO much better about the whole thing, please tell me now the reason puppies die is because I sneeze to much

this is a classic "what did i just read? this can't be real?!" but sadly i know it is..sorry to hear :hugs: people are such jerks!


----------



## Gunnhilde

kassiaethne said:


> why do people think it is helpful to comment on why I had my miscarriage??? like telling me I was to stressed really helps ME feel better about it all? like if I had been less stressed and done things right instead of sleeping on the floor for a couple days I would be having my baby next month. thank you, that has made me feel SO much better about the whole thing, please tell me now the reason puppies die is because I sneeze to much

:hugs: People can be soo ridiculous sometimes!


----------



## kassiaethne

yeah it is mostly men really who talk to my husband about their wives and if their wife miscarried they all just sit there together and compare what happened and decide it musta been something we did wrong so we can not do that thing again, they can't seem to accept that these things happen and there sometimes isn't any controlling it. 

Then my husband comes home and talks to me about all the things they have thought of that we did wrong so we can not do it again. meh....so helpful 

Sometimes I wish he would keep it to himself but then I feel selfish because if hes talking about it with people maybe that's his way of dealing with it and maybe he needs to talk to people about it. ya know? but geeze I wish these people would stop saying these things it hurts

Jcom-yeah I have been a little MIA because of all the bleeding getting me down. I don't know why I am bleeding in the middle of my cycle. but it stopped today so that's maybe a good sign. tried some pregnancy tests but the line is so freaking faint I think its all in my head or just a evap, it technically is earily for me to test anyways being as I should get my period on the 3rd. So I am waiting to see if my doctor appointment pulls up anything with my gyno tomorrow.


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## wellsk

:hugs:
I think it's good, as you said; that your OH is getting himself out there and confiding in others about how he feels. Keeping it locked up inside is so dangerous for your mental health and well being.
But at the same time I think maybe you should tell him not to tell you the discussions they have. Because they're entitled to their opinions, wrong or not. But it's not fair on them to shove them in your face.


----------



## tsyhanochka

Hey Allergy flareup, You best be gone by the time we set out on our roadtrip on Saturday... I do not want to deal with you for 2 weeks. And that will be exactly for our TWW so.... no helpful drugs for this gal. And it better be allergies... I don't want to be actually sick!


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## tamithomas

kassiaethne: FX for you that the mid term bleeding is a good sign and nothing bad!

Dear me: even though I have the most patient cat in the world that doesn't mind it and actually enjoys it, I gotta stop holding her like a baby. I realized today that I do it as a void filler and it's not healthy. The first step is admitting you have a problem, now to correct the habit.


----------



## Storked

It hurts my feelings when pregnant women who know that I miscarried say that they wouldn't mind miscarrying because they are never attached to their baby until it is born. Or that they wished that they would miscarry because they hate being sick. I cannot stand much more.


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## laustiredttc

all i can say is i'm sorry ladies you have had to deal with all this. A mc no matter what anyone says is a hurtful and sorrowful thiing to happen to anyone. I hope you ladies who have experienced such can heal eventually and get the little miracles you are hoping for. Sending you all lots of :dust: and :hugs:


----------



## laurac1988

So today I had to go to the doctor because I had breathing difficulties yesterday. Thought my asthma was back, but turns out have a chest infection. Got sent home with an inhaler and some antibiotics. Also have to wait until I've missed two periods for blood tests... that's only a week away. 

I met up with DP after my appointment and walked with her to the station as she had to go to work. I hugged her just before she left and some guy wolf whistled. Ok... so can ignore that. Shot him a dirty look. Then some douche on a mobility scooter came wheeling over and said "give us a kiss will you?" He just got another dirty look, but I am SO sick of people's attitude towards us as a lesbian couple. Why do pervy old men think that we're obviously interested in them? Why do people think our relationship is obviously something for them to comment on?!

Doesn't help that I'm not feeling great at the moment anyway. Saw a "friend" a few weeks ago say something on Twitter about DP and I now being "married" and "isn't that hilarious?" F*cktard.

I'm irate this morning. Why are people so f*cking dumb?


----------



## HWPG

this is more of an open apology than a rant:
to my family and friends - i'm sorry i've become so bitter and close-hearted towards the world that you start conversations with, "is it ok to talk about this?". i know you are being thoughtful and kind, and i appreciate it, but it also makes me so sad that topics that are common to other people are sensitive between us. i'm sorry my sister and others have to subdue her excitement over her pregnancy for my feelings. i am so thankful that you understand. it's a rock and a hard place. i swear i'm not really a robot with no feelings.


----------



## J_Lynn

I am going to vent about my boss. I love her; we've been friends for years ... but here lately, she's starting to really piss me off. 

She just barely is 30 and had a hysterectomy due to a whole laundry list of complications - she was fine with it, she HATES children ... like loathes the fact that anyone would ever want to have them and thinks its tragic her parents had to raise one. That bad. So she said her ordeal was a blessing and the greatest thing that could have ever happened to her. 

That is obviously not how I feel about having children. With all my appointments and things, she is actually trying to convince me NOT to have kids and is mad when I use my vacation and sick time to go to my appointments! She says if I was smart I would just get everything taken out becuase if I asked long enough they would say they'd do it - and if I couldn't find a doctor who would, she knows her doctor would. She says I'm stupid for wanting to have a child and that once I get knocked up it will be too late and I'll want to give it up when it's 3 because I'll never be able to eat dinner without some screaming brat in my ear. 

Like horrible, mean things and she just pisses me off. I can't say anything about it to her because I almost think deep down, she is opressing her feelings about what happened because she said once at one time she wanted a child, and she was in a horribly abusive relationship as a teenager - got pregnant, and he convinced her to terminate the pregnancy. So, I think she may be so rude as a cover for the hurt she feels that even though I am having problems, I still have a chance of hopefully getting pregnant. With my HSG this Wednesday, she is like livid that I'm going and is trying to get me to put it off until next month. I don't get it .... it is really hurting that we've been friends for 7 years and she is so unsupportive. IF she wasn't my boss, I wouldn't even talk to her about it - just because I don't want my pregnant friends talking to me about their pregnancies and how super they're going, so I wouldn't want to talk about my chances and things to my friends who cannot have a chance of naturally getting pregnant - it's just not nice. 

I just don't know what to do and I want to scream at her!!! Should I tell her to just shut the heck up and leave her feelings in her head, or just let her get it out and respond how she wants, because I really think it is opressed emotions. I'm so confused, I want to hug her - but at the same time, punch her in the nose!


----------



## jcombs35

Stupid green eyed monster has got a grip on me! Since I got my faint BFP's, I joined another group of people who also got BFP's. While my lines are disappearing, theirs are getting darker, their blood work showing good things. I have to wait 11 more days for AF before I can even get blood work, and that's if AF doesn't show! I love these ladies all to death, they are very supportive and knowledgeable, and I am truly happy for them. I really am. But the fact that I'm more likely than not losing my pregnancy is really breaking my heart. I wish I didn't feel like this.


----------



## tammym1974

Love this thread!

Here's my vent...I absolutely hate the fact that my husband's cousin's "perfect" wife is pregnant... with twins...twin girls. Just perfect. Why not me? :dohh:


----------



## Storked

jcombs35 said:


> Stupid green eyed monster has got a grip on me! Since I got my faint BFP's, I joined another group of people who also got BFP's. While my lines are disappearing, theirs are getting darker, their blood work showing good things. I have to wait 11 more days for AF before I can even get blood work, and that's if AF doesn't show! I love these ladies all to death, they are very supportive and knowledgeable, and I am truly happy for them. I really am. But the fact that I'm more likely than not losing my pregnancy is really breaking my heart. I wish I didn't feel like this.

I have been/still am there. I am so sorry :(


----------



## wellsk

My rant for this evening:
I just want to have sex like a normal person! Not to be terrified of the feeling of penetration, like hot stabbing pains into my vagina which brings me to tears!! I want to have sex everyday, and be able to TTC like a normal person.
But no, at just 21 I only have sex at best 3 times a month. It's not fair! Why did this have to start?! Why can't it just go away?!
I feel so abnormal and so unwomanly. :cry:


----------



## Gunnhilde

wellsk said:


> My rant for this evening:
> I just want to have sex like a normal person! Not to be terrified of the feeling of penetration, like hot stabbing pains into my vagina which brings me to tears!! I want to have sex everyday, and be able to TTC like a normal person.
> But no, at just 21 I only have sex at best 3 times a month. It's not fair! Why did this have to start?! Why can't it just go away?!
> I feel so abnormal and so unwomanly. :cry:

:hugs: If it makes you feel any better, and I'm not sure it will, my sex life sucks too! OH is way too big for me and it hurts in ways I can not describe. Also, probably because I'm so tight, he finishes in like 60 to 90 seconds. Magical!! 

Hopefully things will work themselves out in that department for you. :flower:


----------



## wellsk

Thanks Gunnhilde. I've had tests and therapy, and while sex is possible now. It's still difficult. I can really sympathise with you. The pain is probably very similar, DH's size is fine (or originally was!) but the problem is that my muscle completely lock shut.
My DH is complete the opposite of your OH, he can literally go for hours and hours. :blush:


----------



## tsyhanochka

Coworker: You got the job because you had an 'eagle eye for detail, and enthusiasm, and drive like no one else in the office'. Now that you're knocked up, you miss things, are tired and lazy.... and blame it on 'baby brain' or because your LO was up or sick, or cranky blah blah blah. I'm sorry, I don't know how I'll manage for 6 more months of you on this project. Especially, watching your belly get bigger and bigger while we're in cycle 9 already.


----------



## pbl_ge

Here's today's vent: The woman whose signature says she conceived the first month she tried, and that it's probably the luck of the Irish needs to get the HELL off the TTC forums! Or change her obnoxious signature. Seriously. I'm not one of those people who thinks expecting people shouldn't be here, but she posts a LOT, and that's pretty much rubbing others' face in her success. 

For @#$%@#$%'s sake!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## wellsk

Another rant about the woman that I know...

Today she's a week overdue (serves her right after trying to get baby out with castor oil! :haha: ) and her midwife was meant to be seeing her to do a sweep. But now her midwife is overbooked and says she has to cancel her appointment. And now pregnant girl's going mental and saying it's not acceptable and she has no choice but to come and sort it!

Once again, I don't think the midwife chose you because she felt like it or doesn't like you! (although I wish she did!) She chose not to see you because there's more important cases that need dealing with first. You are not a special case, you are a normal pregnant woman. So shut up and put up!


----------



## tamithomas

Gunnhilde said:


> wellsk said:
> 
> 
> My rant for this evening:
> I just want to have sex like a normal person! Not to be terrified of the feeling of penetration, like hot stabbing pains into my vagina which brings me to tears!! I want to have sex everyday, and be able to TTC like a normal person.
> But no, at just 21 I only have sex at best 3 times a month. It's not fair! Why did this have to start?! Why can't it just go away?!
> I feel so abnormal and so unwomanly. :cry:
> 
> :hugs: If it makes you feel any better, and I'm not sure it will, my sex life sucks too! OH is way too big for me and it hurts in ways I can not describe. Also, probably because I'm so tight, he finishes in like 60 to 90 seconds. Magical!!
> 
> Hopefully things will work themselves out in that department for you. :flower:Click to expand...

The pain aprt I can totally relate.. DH keeps on teasing how he's small and what not but truth is I get the same nervous and "oh crap" feeling right before and during penetration then if I were get a needle shot. No matter how much lube we use or how much foreplay is involved, it hurts. I'm tiny to begin with which doesn't help.


----------



## tamithomas

pbl_ge said:


> Here's today's vent: The woman whose signature says she conceived the first month she tried, and that it's probably the luck of the Irish needs to get the HELL off the TTC forums! Or change her obnoxious signature. Seriously. I'm not one of those people who thinks expecting people shouldn't be here, but she posts a LOT, and that's pretty much rubbing others' face in her success.
> 
> For @#$%@#$%'s sake!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh my, has anyone called her out? I have not been in the TTC part in a long time because it's full of the short term tryers or BFP ladies who come to show "support". If you're gonna do that, at least turn the damn ticker/signature off :growlmad:


----------



## wellsk

:hugs:
I've never suffered pain like it in my life. I think it was this time last year that I started getting treatment for it. I had an OB/GYN appointment, and even him trying to put a cotton bud swab inside was agony! When he tried to have a look inside, I was sobbing and screaming in pain. They had to get a nurse to come and hold my hand.

I remember feeling so embarrassed, and when I went home I just cried for hours!

I went to see a psychosexual counsellor who really helped so much. I can now use tampons, and things like oral sex and fumblings are no longer terrifying, or well, just impossible! My DH has been an absolute rock, and accepted for a while that sex was not an option for us. He's extremely loving and will go to great lengths to make me feel comfortable and wanted.


----------



## jcombs35

Oh I hope I don't hurt anyone by talking about my impending chemical pregnancy. I certainly don't mean to offend, and I have suffered many losses myself. When I got my first BFP, I did put up a ticker, but as my lines faded, it only hurt me more, so I took it down. I do apologize if I've hurt anyone. It was not my intention, and I would never ever rub a successful pregnancy in someone's face. I have had someone do that to me, and it's just awful.


----------



## wellsk

I'm sure no one was aiming that at you jcombs :hugs:
After all your losses, I'm sure everyone would agree, we'd all be happy to hear that you'd had some success. I saw a girl who was in the WTT, she's only just moved and she's already pregnant. I'm happy for her, but it just makes me so sad :( If I'd got pregnant the first time I tried, my due date would be next month! I want that more than anything... but no, it's not for us :(


----------



## 4magpies

Please let this be it. 

Don't be tricking me body. 

I don't want to get my hopes up too much to have them shattered again.


----------



## jcombs35

Thank you. I didn't think it was aimed at me, but it made me think. I'm "whining" about it, and some people may be happy to get one. Although maybe not since I'm very sure it's not sticking... 

A couple nights ago, no one was talking to me, so I was bouncing around the forums, searching to see if anyone was going through what I am, and I came across a post from someone who had gotten pregnant her first cycle. And she was very insensitive in her bragging about it too. It's probably a good thing I can't reach through my computer, cause the way I was feeling, I might have choked her to death!! I mean, how would she like to go years and years trying and still be here in these forums?


----------



## jcombs35

4magpies said:


> Please let this be it.
> 
> Don't be tricking me body.
> 
> I don't want to get my hopes up too much to have them shattered again.

Fingers crossed for you! I'm in the same boat, and I seriously don't know what I'm gonna do if this isn't it. I'm afraid I'm losing it! :hugs:


----------



## wellsk

Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. It's like they are actually gloating on purpose... I know that they're really proud of themselves and every other thought has gone to pot. But if they had even one cycle of disappointment, surely they'd realise how painful it is to see others showing off what they've got.

People just don't seem to get it, and to be honest I think the mods (or someone) should step in and take them down a peg or two.


----------



## jcombs35

Yep exactly. I'm happy for them, but I'm also miserable I'm not in their "club." In the ttc forum, isn't there even a post about not posting your BFP's on there? I know I read that somewhere. And I understand why. Honestly, this is the first time I've detected a pregnancy before a chemical,(possible chemical I must say so I don't drive myself nuts) but given that it takes an average of 2/3 years for me to conceive, I think I probably have them quite often.

I can only imagine how awful it must be for some of those who go through this early testing every month! It must be heartbreaking, but I do admire their strength! Two cycles of this and I'm getting ready to check in to the nuthouse. Wish I could go back to ntnp, but I want it too bad at this point, so I'm gonna keep going til I have that little miracle in my arms!!


----------



## 4magpies

jcombs35 said:


> 4magpies said:
> 
> 
> Please let this be it.
> 
> Don't be tricking me body.
> 
> I don't want to get my hopes up too much to have them shattered again.
> 
> Fingers crossed for you! I'm in the same boat, and I seriously don't know what I'm gonna do if this isn't it. I'm afraid I'm losing it! :hugs:Click to expand...

Thank you, you too! 

I know my chances are tiny but my chart is looking so good. I nearly jumped for joy this morning after taking my temp seeing it rise after a big dip. 

OH is stupidly excited too. 

We need this. 

Baby dust for everyone. 

xxx


----------



## wellsk

I think it's kinda the idea that you can't create a thread to say 'I'm pregnant' in the TTC forum. But theres nothing wrong with telling people, or putting in your Sig and going into the TTC forums :dohh:

Hugs sweet, I can't imagine how awful it is for you. It must be so scary and such a rollercoaster :hugs:

When I was trying, I couldn't NTNP, I was just to desperate, and every little thing bothered me and I'd be thinking of everything. Getting that BFN every month is agonising, I think I've written on it before, that you almost grieve for the baby that was in your mind. Just not in your womb :(


----------



## jcombs35

I think I've written on it before, that you almost grieve for the baby that was in your mind. Just not in your womb :([/QUOTE]

Oh yes. Yes you sure do. Beautifully said. :cry:


----------



## jcombs35

Storked said:


> Cheering you on jcombs and sending sticky thoughts your way!

Thank you. Please make them extra sticky!! :thumbup:


----------



## tamithomas

I'm just surprised how insensitive some BFP ladies can be, especially those who were LTTC'ers then suddenly the become pregnantzilla bragging 101 on the TTC side of the website. makes zero sense. Maybe pregnancy causes short term memory loss :haha:


----------



## wellsk

It must do Tami! Everyone has permisson to slap me if I get like that! :haha:


----------



## Storked

tamithomas said:


> I'm just surprised how insensitive some BFP ladies can be, especially those who were LTTC'ers then suddenly the become pregnantzilla bragging 101 on the TTC side of the website. makes zero sense. Maybe pregnancy causes short term memory loss :haha:

Bragging and/or whining. Like we wouldn't happily have morning sickness. :)


----------



## jcombs35

tamithomas said:


> I'm just surprised how insensitive some BFP ladies can be, especially those who were LTTC'ers then suddenly the become pregnantzilla bragging 101 on the TTC side of the website. makes zero sense. Maybe pregnancy causes short term memory loss :haha:

*Maybe pregnancy causes short term memory loss [/QUOTE]*:haha:
Why do they brag on TTC forums anyway? When I first got my faint line, the first place I went was to the pregnancy test forum. I didn't want to rub it in anyone's face. It wasn't til it started fading that I came back here. And that was just because I knew people here would understand. Every post I made about my fading lines in the other forums almost were ignored.:dohh:


----------



## wellsk

By the way (and slight off topic), that girl that I told you about earlier that had a go at her midwife because she cancelled her appointment... She complained at actually made her come out to see her. What a bitch.


----------



## jcombs35

Ugh... I have a step sister in law about the same way. She's on her third pregnancy, and since like month 6, all we've heard is her complaining. Well, she's due sometime in August. Not even sure when, but I think the early part. She insisted that she and her husband go walking yesterday, so they went to the mall. She fell! She's at 3 centimeters, but they sent her home because she wasn't actually in labor. So she went to a hospital in a bigger city (farther away) and they sent her home too.

Now she's all complaining about that. I do understand it's scary that she fell, and that she probably is in pain. Yep, I sure do. But I've just got this gut feeling that she's milking it up to try to get induced. All we've heard for at least the last two months was how she can't wait to get that baby "out of her." Ever since she heard me talk about how they had to induce me two weeks early with my oldest son because of pre-eclampsia (sp?) she has just had ALL of the symptoms of it....

Then she claims to be so concerned, but every day has to go somewhere and do something. She will not sit her butt down and rest, which is def what she needs to do before something stupid does happen. My oldest was born 2 weeks early, and he had a few health problems because of it.

Sit you arse down and relax. Keep that baby in there til she's ready for this harsh world! What's wrong with you?

Sorry... that turned into a vent... :haha:


----------



## laurac1988

This one in donor related. 

My donor is a "high offspring donor". He had had 44 successful pregnancies with donor children. This other forum I go on treat him like he is the most evil thing alive and say mean things about all the people using him as their donor. They claim people who are his recipient didn't think about their choice of donor or couldn't get someone else to do it. Some of these people call themselves my friend. 

I'm so fucked off with it.


----------



## tsyhanochka

wellsk said:


> I think I've written on it before, that you almost grieve for the baby that was in your mind. Just not in your womb

That sums up how I felt when af came the last time. Absolutely devastated. I had let myself get my hopes up and everything. I have started temping to set my mind at ease to see that I am ovulating. I have very short, light periods but they come like clockwork. Sometimes painful. So I get worried that things are not right in there. I come from VERY fertile families so I feel like a dud being in cycle 9.

:dust: to all of us. For sticky beans and bfp.


----------



## HWPG

jcombs, so sorry to hear whats happening. :hugs:
the "grieving over a child in your mind, not just in your womb" - perfectly said, brought tears to my eyes. Each month i think "if i get BFP, the baby will be here for X (holiday, someone else's bday, other event)" - and each month it's devastating. i know we all feel the same. it's SO hard not to think ahead, and harder to have that desire unmet. thank you for expressing what i couldnt say.


----------



## J_Lynn

wellsk said:


> I'm sure no one was aiming that at you jcombs :hugs:
> After all your losses, I'm sure everyone would agree, we'd all be happy to hear that you'd had some success. I saw a girl who was in the WTT, she's only just moved and she's already pregnant. I'm happy for her, but it just makes me so sad :( If I'd got pregnant the first time I tried, my due date would be next month! I want that more than anything... but no, it's not for us :(

What you said....if I got pregnant the first time I tried, I'd have at least a 5 year old. *sigh*


----------



## J_Lynn

wellsk said:


> I think it's kinda the idea that you can't create a thread to say 'I'm pregnant' in the TTC forum. But theres nothing wrong with telling people, or putting in your Sig and going into the TTC forums :dohh:
> 
> Hugs sweet, I can't imagine how awful it is for you. It must be so scary and such a rollercoaster :hugs:
> 
> When I was trying, I couldn't NTNP, I was just to desperate, and every little thing bothered me and I'd be thinking of everything. Getting that BFN every month is agonising, I think I've written on it before, that you almost grieve for the baby that was in your mind. Just not in your womb :(

On one of the forums I'm a member of. When you register you have to say if your signature or avatar will include anything about children or pregnancy - there are certain forums that automatically remove your signature or avatar if it includes those things just for those women who don't want to see babies and pg tests in avatars and such. I thought that was a sweet idea. Its just removing salt from the wounds in those certain forums that those with us having a harder time don't have to be reminded every 3 seconds.


----------



## wellsk

Yeah, that's an awesome idea J_Lynn! When I was TTC originally, I wasn't on any forum, but I can imagine the agony of seeing something like that when you've just got your AF :(


----------



## jcombs35

I kinda think they should do that for any of these ttc threads. It would take the sting out for a lot of women.


----------



## Gunnhilde

J_Lynn said:


> wellsk said:
> 
> 
> I think it's kinda the idea that you can't create a thread to say 'I'm pregnant' in the TTC forum. But theres nothing wrong with telling people, or putting in your Sig and going into the TTC forums :dohh:
> 
> Hugs sweet, I can't imagine how awful it is for you. It must be so scary and such a rollercoaster :hugs:
> 
> When I was trying, I couldn't NTNP, I was just to desperate, and every little thing bothered me and I'd be thinking of everything. Getting that BFN every month is agonising, I think I've written on it before, that you almost grieve for the baby that was in your mind. Just not in your womb :(
> 
> On one of the forums I'm a member of. When you register you have to say if your signature or avatar will include anything about children or pregnancy - there are certain forums that automatically remove your signature or avatar if it includes those things just for those women who don't want to see babies and pg tests in avatars and such. I thought that was a sweet idea. Its just removing salt from the wounds in those certain forums that those with us having a harder time don't have to be reminded every 3 seconds.Click to expand...

Or people could just be mature and use the spoiler thing or hide their signature (which is an option every time you post).

IMO, pregnant (or wondering if they are pregnant) ladies posting in WTT is a big problem too. 

As a serious aside, does it bother people to see the whole WTT #2 and the DD thing in my signature? I've never thought about it before....

Ughhh, I really do think some people don't get that getting pregnant the first time is really just luck and nothing but...as though there needs to be some advice given to women who have to wait additional cycles. :dohh:


----------



## Yammas

Whenever I see that spoiler box in someones sig I aytomatically want to see what it is so that wouldnt help me :haha: although I do like to see how long it took some women to get their bfp especially if theyve been trying for a while, it gives me hope that it can still happen just depends what mood im in.

As for the bfp first month I always wonder if theyll fall again soo quickly next time if they dont it must be extra frustrating knowing it happend soo easily last time.


----------



## Storked

It is frustrating. I lost my first and the body can take a while to normalize and that is über frustrating :(


----------



## laurac1988

Part of me likes to see peoples tickers. They give me hope, especially when can see they were trying for a long time or similar. Guess we're all different though


----------



## laurac1988

RANT

ARRRGHHHHHH why do antibiotics always give me thrush?!?! I don't want the chest infection... but i DON'T want thrush either *is miserable*


----------



## wellsk

I don't know if it helps you, but to keep thrush away I use 'Wrights Coal Tar Soap'... It doesn't exactly smell great, but it cleared up my thrush really quickly without using pessaries, creams, etc. And it's suppose to keep it at bay too! :thumbup:


----------



## laurac1988

Thanks hun will give it a go. Am drinking yakult too. Doc says that will help


----------



## nursemommy

Well it is official...The friend who came to me 2 months ago asking for advice and for things I have learned over the lawst 8 months is now pregnant. Before she started she asked me why I was doing ovulation tests so I explained them. I explained the best time to get pregnant along with what the cm should be. 2 months and she sends me a text wit a nice big ole digital test saying pregnant and no other message. She sent it as she was walking up to me to see my reacton. My reaction wasn't happy (I didn't see her coming so I couldn't switch on the OMG YEAAAAA face and voice fast enough and he noticed I was upset). I just said I am glad you didn't have to try for so long to know what I am feeling knowing a friend of mine only tried for 2 months and got pregnant. I am very happy for her but it also hurts. Then she had the ovaries to say "We were pregnant together last time so you better hurry up and get pregnant this cycle so we can be pregnant at the same time again." DUH if i got pregnat when I wanted to I would be 8 months pregnant! I am trying to be a good friend and be happy for her because right now it is all about her happy time...but I am not going to lie I want it to be me. I hate feeling jealous like this but I can't really help it!


----------



## J_Lynn

Gunnhilde said:


> J_Lynn said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> wellsk said:
> 
> 
> I think it's kinda the idea that you can't create a thread to say 'I'm pregnant' in the TTC forum. But theres nothing wrong with telling people, or putting in your Sig and going into the TTC forums :dohh:
> 
> Hugs sweet, I can't imagine how awful it is for you. It must be so scary and such a rollercoaster :hugs:
> 
> When I was trying, I couldn't NTNP, I was just to desperate, and every little thing bothered me and I'd be thinking of everything. Getting that BFN every month is agonising, I think I've written on it before, that you almost grieve for the baby that was in your mind. Just not in your womb :(
> 
> On one of the forums I'm a member of. When you register you have to say if your signature or avatar will include anything about children or pregnancy - there are certain forums that automatically remove your signature or avatar if it includes those things just for those women who don't want to see babies and pg tests in avatars and such. I thought that was a sweet idea. Its just removing salt from the wounds in those certain forums that those with us having a harder time don't have to be reminded every 3 seconds.Click to expand...
> 
> Or people could just be mature and use the spoiler thing or hide their signature (which is an option every time you post).
> 
> IMO, pregnant (or wondering if they are pregnant) ladies posting in WTT is a big problem too.
> 
> As a serious aside, does it bother people to see the whole WTT #2 and the DD thing in my signature? I've never thought about it before....
> 
> Ughhh, I really do think some people don't get that getting pregnant the first time is really just luck and nothing but...as though there needs to be some advice given to women who have to wait additional cycles. :dohh:Click to expand...

People who have kids don't bother me, personally - I don't know how anyone else feels about it though. But I have two step-kids, so I am used to being around kids 24/7. Although, I get the green-eyed monster about them all the time. I hate that my hubby coddles them when they're sick and how they cling to him lovingly and blah - it makes me sick. Not because he's the best dad I know (other than my own, of course) but because they're not mine. lol I know, it's petty and horrible - but it's the truth. If they're only paying him attention I sit there like a jealous pissed off kid until they come jump on me. Then all is well LOL 

But yeah, seeing that people have kids doesn't bother me; it's just the "OMG I ONLY TRIED FOR 3 WHOLE DAYS AND I GOT KNOCKED UP! BUT IT WAS THE LONGEST 3 DAYS EVER!!!!!!!!" people that I want to punch in the nose.  It's like, congrats - but seriously, pay attention to where the hell you're posting ... clearly we don't want details. lol


----------



## J_Lynn

laurac1988 said:


> Part of me likes to see peoples tickers. They give me hope, especially when can see they were trying for a long time or similar. Guess we're all different though

YES! When I see someone who is like "After 4 years, BFP" or "Finally BFP after 8 years" it just warms my heart. THOSE people I an _geniunely_ over the top happy for and would just hug the poop out of them if I saw them in person. Like my friend from high school who has been trying for 7+ years and finally is pregnant, I am going to try to drive from West TN to NC for her baby shower. And I am going to spoil the crap out of her kid. Because they wanted that baby for SO long and I just think it is SUCH a blessing that she finally got it after trying literally everything they could try. It makes me get goose bumps just thinking about it.


----------



## J_Lynn

wellsk said:


> I don't know if it helps you, but to keep thrush away I use 'Wrights Coal Tar Soap'... It doesn't exactly smell great, but it cleared up my thrush really quickly without using pessaries, creams, etc. And it's suppose to keep it at bay too! :thumbup:

What .... in ... the ... world ... is ... thrush ....???


----------



## kristyrich

jcombs35 said:


> I wish everyone would stop sighing in relief each time I find out I'm not pregnant. I WANT to be! Yes, it would make my 4th child. Yes, I'm thankful for the 3 I already have, but we would like another one! Yes, I know how it happens, no, it's not in the water, and I think I'm old enough to make an informed decision as to whether or not to have another one!!
> 
> Every single time I have found out I am pregnant, my mother has made this God awful face as though I've just told her I have 6 months to live. I was her only one, and she didn't even want me. (She was glad to have me though. She just wasn't trying and didn't really want kids.) Just because she didn't want kids doesn't mean I don't! I take care of my kids. I don't pawn them off on other people and then act like I'm the world's greatest mother. Yes, I complain about them sometimes, but my life would be empty and meaningless without them. Yes, I want another one, and yes, I'm disappointed that it's not happening. Then you have the nerve to be upset because I don't talk to you about it? Come on...

Wow hun, that sounds Exactly like my situation and I mean exactly. I dont think I even need to rant because you have just wriiten everything I would of. And FXd for your BFP hun!!!


----------



## jcombs35

kristyrich said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> I wish everyone would stop sighing in relief each time I find out I'm not pregnant. I WANT to be! Yes, it would make my 4th child. Yes, I'm thankful for the 3 I already have, but we would like another one! Yes, I know how it happens, no, it's not in the water, and I think I'm old enough to make an informed decision as to whether or not to have another one!!
> 
> Every single time I have found out I am pregnant, my mother has made this God awful face as though I've just told her I have 6 months to live. I was her only one, and she didn't even want me. (She was glad to have me though. She just wasn't trying and didn't really want kids.) Just because she didn't want kids doesn't mean I don't! I take care of my kids. I don't pawn them off on other people and then act like I'm the world's greatest mother. Yes, I complain about them sometimes, but my life would be empty and meaningless without them. Yes, I want another one, and yes, I'm disappointed that it's not happening. Then you have the nerve to be upset because I don't talk to you about it? Come on...
> 
> Wow hun, that sounds Exactly like my situation and I mean exactly. I dont think I even need to rant because you have just wriiten everything I would of. And FXd for your BFP hun!!!Click to expand...

Thank you! :hugs: I've had 12 bfp's, but a negative doctor's urine test, and 20 days of bright red spotting. Not sure if I've miscarried or had a chemical or what. Waiting 10 long long long days to find out if AF will come or not!


----------



## kristyrich

jcombs35 said:


> kristyrich said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> I wish everyone would stop sighing in relief each time I find out I'm not pregnant. I WANT to be! Yes, it would make my 4th child. Yes, I'm thankful for the 3 I already have, but we would like another one! Yes, I know how it happens, no, it's not in the water, and I think I'm old enough to make an informed decision as to whether or not to have another one!!
> 
> Every single time I have found out I am pregnant, my mother has made this God awful face as though I've just told her I have 6 months to live. I was her only one, and she didn't even want me. (She was glad to have me though. She just wasn't trying and didn't really want kids.) Just because she didn't want kids doesn't mean I don't! I take care of my kids. I don't pawn them off on other people and then act like I'm the world's greatest mother. Yes, I complain about them sometimes, but my life would be empty and meaningless without them. Yes, I want another one, and yes, I'm disappointed that it's not happening. Then you have the nerve to be upset because I don't talk to you about it? Come on...
> 
> Wow hun, that sounds Exactly like my situation and I mean exactly. I dont think I even need to rant because you have just wriiten everything I would of. And FXd for your BFP hun!!!Click to expand...
> 
> Thank you! :hugs: I've had 12 bfp's, but a negative doctor's urine test, and 20 days of bright red spotting. Not sure if I've miscarried or had a chemical or what. Waiting 10 long long long days to find out if AF will come or not!Click to expand...

Oh hun! I hope everything works out! Please keep me updated when you find out! Best of luck:hugs: im 6dpo so probably another week before I will test.


----------



## jcombs35

I will be testing sometime tomorrow. lol


----------



## LauraR

I am sooooo sick of people saying "Any news yet" "when are you going to have one" "Why don't you chart then just "do it" when your ovulating" DONT YOU THINK I"M CHARTING i've spent 100's of dollars on ovulation tests idiot...If I had any news I'd share it ,now STFU :) okay feel better now! Thanks ~L


----------



## kristyrich

jcombs35 said:


> I will be testing sometime tomorrow. lol

lol, goodluck. You can join me on my post (I need some buddies) if you like. Would love to hear how it all goes!:hugs:


----------



## tamithomas

nursemommy said:


> Then she had the ovaries to say "We were pregnant together last time so you better hurry up and get pregnant this cycle so we can be pregnant at the same time again."

my hat goes off to you.. it would have taken ever ounce of strength to resist b&&ch slapping the shiznit out of her for that one!


----------



## tamithomas

Dear everyone in my personal life: Please stop telling me I'm gonna be such a great mom and that my maternal instincts are enormous. Don't you think I know that? I dream nightly and day dream right before I fall asleep each night about having a little boy or girl in my arms to call me mommy and to look after and sometimes cry myself to sleep. In other words, even though it's a compliment people should learn to watch what they say before opening their mouths. You never know what could actually be going on.


----------



## jcombs35

I feel like I'm wishing my life away! I wish for AF due date, when it always comes, I wish for it to get over. I wish for ovulation due date. Then I wish the tww would hurry up and go by. Now I'm in the stage of wishing for AF due date. Still 9 long days. Please just let my bfp stick so I can sit back and enjoy my life!!


----------



## HWPG

J_Lynn said:


> What you said....if I got pregnant the first time I tried, I'd have at least a 5 year old. *sigh*

i hear that. i'd have an almost 5 yo, my house back, my dog back, and not be divorced. oh, how 4 years can change your life!


----------



## Fizzyfefe

Stupid FF, stop telling me that I am PROBABLY NOT FERTILE. I get it. You don't have to rub it in my face with that stupid red stop light.


----------



## Gunnhilde

HWPG said:


> J_Lynn said:
> 
> 
> What you said....if I got pregnant the first time I tried, I'd have at least a 5 year old. *sigh*
> 
> i hear that. i'd have an almost 5 yo, my house back, my dog back, and not be divorced. oh, how 4 years can change your life!Click to expand...

I'm you in opposite land. If I hadn't conceived I would have had a big house, wouldn't have my dog back, and would have still been married to XH!


I have a vent sort of on behalf of other women, but it still pisses me off. Why, oh why, husbands/partners/boyfriends of the world do you think it is ok to tell your wives/girlfriends that you don't want children (after already having told her you did), or you only want one (when you already agreed to more), or why do you toy with them for years without giving them a firm TTC date? 

:growlmad::growlmad::growlmad: 

Oh, and OH, there is no guarantee that we will conceive a boy just because you "know we will."


----------



## laurac1988

I really hate when people post exactly the same thing on about 100 threads!!!


----------



## wellsk

I was just nosing through the teen pregnancy tumblr tags, which I regularly do to beat myself up (it's like my own personal form of torture).
And there's one 17 year old on there who had this to say about her own pregnancy (bear in mind she's only 9 weeks);
'I don&#8217;t even wanna pretend like I&#8217;m enjoying this.
The cons really outweigh the pros.
I&#8217;m sure in the end that this will all feel worth it, but for right now, all I wanna do is cry.'

How can she even say that?! At the end of her pregnancy she's going to have her beautiful little baby. How could that not be worth walking over broken glass, ice and hot coals for?!
It makes me so mad to see people take it for granted. Yes, I'm sure it's hard going... But so is not being able to get pregnant! And all we get at the end of that is the evil AF!!
If you don't want a baby, or don't want the symptoms, don't get pregnant!!


----------



## tamithomas

laurac1988 said:


> I really hate when people post exactly the same thing on about 100 threads!!!

that's not related to us i hope?


----------



## Yammas

thank you FS for wasting our time :cry:


----------



## Oplittleone

What I would LOVE to say:

Grandmother:
Thank you SO MUCH (insert sarcasm) for making me feel inadequate. Thank you SO MUCH for shoving in my face every single baby picture of every family member's new babies and families. Thank you SO MUCH for actually saying "it's a good thing you don't have any kids" when anything goes wrong in my life. Thank you SO MUCH for saying the same thing when it came to my hobby, which I would gladly give up. Most of all thank you so much for being supportive and understanding. Insert Sarcasm all the way. 

MIL:
Stop being such an uncaring BIT*&! You are unsupportive at every step. I wish my DH would quit talking to you for a little while to give me a breather. I can't believe some of the heartless things that fly out of your mouth. And I can't believe that you constantly HURT the son that does the most for you. Can someone say the apple didn't fall far? 

New IF Friend on different forum:
Thank you for friending me. BUT...I don't like the whining "I want a baby NOW" you sound like Veruca Salt and you are FREAKING 19 years old! 19 and with your BF for all of 1 year, but "he's the one"....Yeah, I BTDT, and guess what? He wasn't the one! It should not be about having babies as a "fashion accessory" it should be wanting to build a family. Not a family with a few different baby daddies, but a real family.

To my SIL and my DH's cousin:
Good Grief, how many freaking times do I have to say things? I gave up. It's a shame that the whole family has to be pains in the a$$, cause it would have been nice to connect to family. Guess not! Thank you for your snide comments at and after my wedding. It was so appreciated. NOT! But I certainly didn't see y'all complaining at the really expensive dinner. Nope, not one word. But to the idiot cousin who knew what we were going thru, thanks so much for asking me to hold your BABY while I was in MY WEDDING GOWN. Guess what? Not gonna happen! Didn't happen


Whew...sorry to any offended


----------



## Torsornin

another pregnancy announcement.....that isnt mine. Right on the cusp of my 30th birthday. Right before I would have been in my 3rd trimester if things would have gone right. Cue tears. I just cant stand it. I dont want to wish you unhappiness, nor no children, you deserve all of the above and more. I just want my turn. Fearing this will never happen for me :(


----------



## laurac1988

tamithomas said:


> laurac1988 said:
> 
> 
> I really hate when people post exactly the same thing on about 100 threads!!!
> 
> that's not related to us i hope?Click to expand...

Nope someone else on other threads I visit. Literally copies and pastes same
Message on about 5 different threads


----------



## jcombs35

I sometimes post similar things in different threads, but it's to update or to find an answer to a question I'm desperate about!


----------



## HWPG

Whoops. I cut and paste sometimes also, but try to put in something personal too. Will be more aware of this in the future. :)


----------



## pbl_ge

Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck of the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.

In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself." 

I reported her. FX that it works.


----------



## jcombs35

pbl_ge said:


> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck o' the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.

What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:


----------



## jcombs35

Well, step sister in law (whom I've complained about on here before) had her baby today. Since all we've heard about in the last 2 months is how she can't wait to get it out of her, I hope she will sthu now! Of course, she'll probably just find something else to complain about. Probably taking care of a newborn...

I have half a mind to go in there and blast her with the same negative insensitive things she has said to me over the last 6 months. (When I told her I was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)

But I will be the bigger person, because I know how it feels when stupid people can't shut their mouths and be supportive.


----------



## pbl_ge

jcombs35 said:


> (when i told her i was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)

.

Omfg!!!!!!


----------



## jcombs35

pbl_ge said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> (when i told her i was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)
> 
> .
> 
> Omfg!!!!!!Click to expand...

I know... I was like, "Did she just say that?" :growlmad:


----------



## J_Lynn

jcombs35 said:


> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> (when i told her i was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)
> 
> .
> 
> Omfg!!!!!!Click to expand...
> 
> I know... I was like, "Did she just say that?" :growlmad:Click to expand...

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!? What an insensitive twat!! Can I say that?? I hope that doesn't get me in trouble - but seriously, REALLY?!?! I would have slapped her in the face - it would have just been a reflex LOL


----------



## J_Lynn

jcombs35 said:


> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck o' the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.
> 
> What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:Click to expand...

I might be a jerk for saying this, and that's just fine - but I hope next time, she sits there for 8 fn years TTC so she knows what it feels like to want something so badly she can't think straight and it consumes thousands of dollars, millions of tears, and tons of emotions that she clearly has never experienced. I really, really don't like her or her signature after that one. Maybe now that she's knocked up she'll find another forum.


----------



## laustiredttc

J_Lynn said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck o' the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.
> 
> What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> I might be a jerk for saying this, and that's just fine - but I hope next time, she sits there for 8 fn years TTC so she knows what it feels like to want something so badly she can't think straight and it consumes thousands of dollars, millions of tears, and tons of emotions that she clearly has never experienced. I really, really don't like her or her signature after that one. Maybe now that she's knocked up she'll find another forum.Click to expand...

i read that girls signature and it really piss%* me off. Totally agree hun she should be reported and next time she ttc hope she gets to experience some of what other ladies have had to go through. 

WHAT A COMPLETE AND INSENSITIVE BIT*%


----------



## wellsk

OH MY GOD!! I can't believe the vileness of that women... does she not have a thought for anyone else in the world?! I really hope she's reading these. She deserves to know what a b*tch she is! I agree with J_Lynn; I hope she has secondary infertility problems and struggles and goes through all the pain that we have to, maybe then she'll grow up and get a life. And have some respect for others around her!


----------



## tamithomas

My vent of the day: day 3 today over due for AF, keep on getting major AF cramps then they dissappear.. please body for effing sakes, either don't show up at all or start AF already!!! Don't give me this in between bullshit!! If no AF by 5 days overdue, will start testing. FX but, not getting my hopes up.. konwing the type of luck i got, I could see myself getting AF 5 minutes after I press post quick reply.


----------



## wellsk

:hugs: I really hope that you're pregnant sweet! And that it's not just your body being mean... I've got everything crossed for you!


----------



## tsyhanochka

FX for you Tami! I hope af stays away. I tested after she was late once and she showed up right after the bfn broke my heart. I wish none of that pain for you. Let us know!!!


----------



## CaliDreaming

tamithomas said:


> My vent of the day: day 3 today over due for AF, keep on getting major AF cramps then they dissappear.. please body for effing sakes, either don't show up at all or start AF already!!! Don't give me this in between bullshit!! If no AF by 5 days overdue, will start testing. FX but, not getting my hopes up.. konwing the type of luck i got, I could see myself getting AF 5 minutes after I press post quick reply.

That actually happened to me once. I had just finished typing out a super long rant, got some coffee, went to the bathroom, and lo and behold there the witch was! I felt soooooo stupid. I had already gotten a bfn a couple of days before but when AF plays around with you it's hard not to feel hopeful.


----------



## tamithomas

CaliDreaming: So true, it's so hard to do both at the same time meaning be hopeful yet stay in the state of mind where you're set, ready and expecting AF especially when you're late. Gotta love to hate these tricky months. Especially since if and I mean a very big if I get my bfp, my Mother's birthday is in 2 weeks so it would be the ultimate gift to give to my mother is announcing she's going to be a grandma. 

Le sigh... back to reality lol, Af where are you? come out, come out wherever you are!


----------



## laurac1988

CD56. Come on AF you stupid cow


----------



## 4magpies

BFN. Why is the would so unfair? Very tempted to go straight for IVF, I hate my body. 

I hate that it doesn't do the job it's meant to do. 

Thank god I have a wonderful OH. 

Can't believe some of the people you are posing about in here. I think twats is the only way to describe them and a very fitting title. 

I cannot go on Facebook any more due to all the kids/preg/babies. 

xxx


----------



## pbl_ge

jcombs35 said:


> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck of the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.
> 
> What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:Click to expand...




J_Lynn said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck of the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.
> 
> What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> I might be a jerk for saying this, and that's just fine - but I hope next time, she sits there for 8 fn years TTC so she knows what it feels like to want something so badly she can't think straight and it consumes thousands of dollars, millions of tears, and tons of emotions that she clearly has never experienced. I really, really don't like her or her signature after that one. Maybe now that she's knocked up she'll find another forum.Click to expand...




laustiredttc said:


> J_Lynn said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck of the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.
> 
> What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> I might be a jerk for saying this, and that's just fine - but I hope next time, she sits there for 8 fn years TTC so she knows what it feels like to want something so badly she can't think straight and it consumes thousands of dollars, millions of tears, and tons of emotions that she clearly has never experienced. I really, really don't like her or her signature after that one. Maybe now that she's knocked up she'll find another forum.Click to expand...
> 
> i read that girls signature and it really piss%* me off. Totally agree hun she should be reported and next time she ttc hope she gets to experience some of what other ladies have had to go through.
> 
> WHAT A COMPLETE AND INSENSITIVE BIT*%Click to expand...




wellsk said:


> OH MY GOD!! I can't believe the vileness of that women... does she not have a thought for anyone else in the world?! I really hope she's reading these. She deserves to know what a b*tch she is! I agree with J_Lynn; I hope she has secondary infertility problems and struggles and goes through all the pain that we have to, maybe then she'll grow up and get a life. And have some respect for others around her!

Be the change you wish to see in the world.

By which I mean to say that others should speak up about this individual. Her emails to me, aside from being obnoxious and pretty insulting, suggested that I'm the only one who has said anything. If you, too, find her signature appalling, take action! One of these ways:
1. Send her a private message.
2. Click the "Report post" icon on the bottom left of her posts.
3. Click the "Contact us" link on the bottom of any page and send a message to the admin people about her.


----------



## jcombs35

pbl_ge said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck o' the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.
> 
> What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> J_Lynn said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck o' the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.Click to expand...
> 
> What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> I might be a jerk for saying this, and that's just fine - but I hope next time, she sits there for 8 fn years TTC so she knows what it feels like to want something so badly she can't think straight and it consumes thousands of dollars, millions of tears, and tons of emotions that she clearly has never experienced. I really, really don't like her or her signature after that one. Maybe now that she's knocked up she'll find another forum.Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> laustiredttc said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> J_Lynn said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> Okay, well here's an update on my previous vent! I sent a very gently worded private message to the person I vented about on page 39 of this thread, suggested that constantly posting in the TTC #1 thread about how you conceived your first month is just great and that it must be "the luck o' the Irish" MIGHT NOT BE VERY FUCKING SENSITIVE OR THOUGHTFUL OR SUPPORTIVE. Ahem. I didn't write that. I just suggested that she hide her signature when posting in these forums.
> 
> In response, she said NO, as it would be "doing a disservice to herself."
> 
> I reported her. FX that it works.Click to expand...
> 
> What a b#$%^!!! I hope it works too!!:growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> I might be a jerk for saying this, and that's just fine - but I hope next time, she sits there for 8 fn years TTC so she knows what it feels like to want something so badly she can't think straight and it consumes thousands of dollars, millions of tears, and tons of emotions that she clearly has never experienced. I really, really don't like her or her signature after that one. Maybe now that she's knocked up she'll find another forum.Click to expand...
> 
> i read that girls signature and it really piss%* me off. Totally agree hun she should be reported and next time she ttc hope she gets to experience some of what other ladies have had to go through.
> 
> WHAT A COMPLETE AND INSENSITIVE BIT*%Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> wellsk said:
> 
> 
> OH MY GOD!! I can't believe the vileness of that women... does she not have a thought for anyone else in the world?! I really hope she's reading these. She deserves to know what a b*tch she is! I agree with J_Lynn; I hope she has secondary infertility problems and struggles and goes through all the pain that we have to, maybe then she'll grow up and get a life. And have some respect for others around her!Click to expand...
> 
> Be the change you wish to see in the world.
> 
> By which I mean to say that others should speak up about this individual. Her emails to me, aside from being obnoxious and pretty insulting, suggested that I'm the only one who has said anything. If you, too, find her signature appalling, take action! One of these ways:
> 1. Send her a private message.
> 2. Click the "Report post" icon on the bottom left of her posts.
> 3. Click the "Contact us" link on the bottom of any page and send a message to the admin people about her.Click to expand...

I can't say anything to her because I don't know who she is. But I would if I could!


----------



## jcombs35

J_Lynn said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> (when i told her i was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)
> 
> .
> 
> Omfg!!!!!!Click to expand...
> 
> I know... I was like, "Did she just say that?" :growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!? What an insensitive twat!! Can I say that?? I hope that doesn't get me in trouble - but seriously, REALLY?!?! I would have slapped her in the face - it would have just been a reflex LOLClick to expand...

I wanted to, but I couldn't hit a pregnant woman.... And at the time, I was so stunned that she actually had said that, I couldn't say anything at all!


----------



## tamithomas

I would PM and sent report but I'm still clueless as to whom you guys are discussing about.


----------



## nursemommy

tamithomas said:


> I would PM and sent report but I'm still clueless as to whom you guys are discussing about.

I too am not sure who they are talking about. I would would say send a report and PM.


----------



## HWPG

tamithomas said:


> I would PM and sent report but I'm still clueless as to whom you guys are discussing about.

at this point, sheer curiosity makes me want to find out also.


----------



## pbl_ge

Well, I definitely don't feel comfortable *publicly* naming this individual (cough :winkwink: cough), but others had mentioned seeing her signature and being upset by it. Just keep your eyes peeled.

Alternatively, a bit of searching with my key phrases from my description will bring her up.

:dust:


----------



## hunni12

jcombs35 said:


> Well, step sister in law (whom I've complained about on here before) had her baby today. Since all we've heard about in the last 2 months is how she can't wait to get it out of her, I hope she will sthu now! Of course, she'll probably just find something else to complain about. Probably taking care of a newborn...
> 
> I have half a mind to go in there and blast her with the same negative insensitive things she has said to me over the last 6 months. (When I told her I was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)
> 
> But I will be the bigger person, because I know how it feels when stupid people can't shut their mouths and be supportive.

I'm sorry she even had the audacity to say that to you. No I didn't try.long, but I would never wish fertility issues on myself or anyone else. Apparently you told her that out of confidence and she should have supported you. People like that you have to feed with a long handled spoon because of their ignorance :hugs:


----------



## pbl_ge

hunni12 said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> Well, step sister in law (whom I've complained about on here before) had her baby today. Since all we've heard about in the last 2 months is how she can't wait to get it out of her, I hope she will sthu now! Of course, she'll probably just find something else to complain about. Probably taking care of a newborn...
> 
> I have half a mind to go in there and blast her with the same negative insensitive things she has said to me over the last 6 months. (When I told her I was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)
> 
> But I will be the bigger person, because I know how it feels when stupid people can't shut their mouths and be supportive.
> 
> I'm sorry she even had the audacity to say that to you. No I didn't try.long, but I would never wish fertility issues on myself or anyone else. Apparently you told her that out of confidence and she should have supported you. People like that you have to feed with a long handled spoon because of their ignorance :hugs:Click to expand...

:rofl:


----------



## 4magpies

What annoys me, people who are nearly 18 weeks pregnant posting in the TTC section. 

Point?


----------



## hunni12

4magpies said:


> What annoys me, people who are nearly 18 weeks pregnant posting in the TTC section.
> 
> Point?

Um maybe cause I can. Problem? As far as I know it's an open forum and I am allowed to post where I want to. So I really see no point in you getting upset for nothing.


----------



## 4magpies

Yes actually? Maybe I'll just go post in baby club and tell people how to bring up their children. 

Because I can. 

Not that I have any experience in it at all. 

Your boasting signature is horrible, some sensitivity goes a long way.


----------



## hunni12

You can post anywhere you please hun. I don't get how I'm boasting but okay.


----------



## pbl_ge

Hunni, you're also posting in the middle of a discussion about how hurtful and offensive it can be to see the signatures boasting about quick conception. If you scroll up a few posts before yours, you might see why you're getting such a strident response. 

These actually AREN'T meant to be open forums. They're meant to be dedicated to those who are in the specified phase, although this isn't strictly enforced. 

I know you, and others like you, mean well. How about hiding your signature in the TTC forums? Just unclick the box to the right below the place you type your response.


----------



## pbl_ge

Ha! You just changed your signature. Well, that's good, anyway, but I think you know how it was boasting. 

Again, I don't think you'd be getting this strong a reaction were it not for the timing of your post.


----------



## CaliDreaming

J_Lynn said:


> I might be a jerk for saying this, and that's just fine - but I hope next time, she sits there for 8 fn years TTC so she knows what it feels like to want something so badly she can't think straight and it consumes thousands of dollars, millions of tears, and tons of emotions that she clearly has never experienced. I really, really don't like her or her signature after that one. Maybe now that she's knocked up she'll find another forum.

For the mean ones, I can't bring myself to wish infertility on them. But I do wish them bad stretch marks, saggy boobs, 50 pound weight gain and that their hubby cheats on them afterward. I guess I'm evil too now that I think about it.


----------



## 4magpies

I'd never wish infertility on anyone either. After having to live with it, and losses. It is truly soul destroying. 

I'm all for the massive weight gain, hubby cheating and millions of stretch marks though. 

I'm a big believer in karma! The world always rights itself.


----------



## hunni12

pbl_ge said:


> Ha! You just changed your signature. Well, that's good, anyway, but I think you know how it was boasting.
> 
> Again, I don't think you'd be getting this strong a reaction were it not for the timing of your post.

I actually changed it because of that specific conversation you ladies were having. I'm not that mean. But to say someone can post here because their pregnant. There are ladies who are ttc that post in the pregnancy boards.


----------



## 4magpies

I have posted on first tri to HELP ladies who are worried about ectopic as I have experienced it and my information is helpful. 

You posting in a thread for people struggling to conceive is not helpful at all. Especially when you had an "it only took me 2 cycles" la de da signature. So yeah. 

Try putting yourself in our shoes.


----------



## pbl_ge

hunni12 said:


> I actually changed it because of that specific conversation you ladies were having. I'm not that mean. But to say someone can post here because their pregnant. There are ladies who are ttc that post in the pregnancy boards.

Do you not see how this is different? 

And thank you, truly, for changing your sig! :thumbup: Everyone here is genuinely happy for those who succeed in achieving pregnancy.


----------



## jcombs35

pbl_ge said:


> hunni12 said:
> 
> 
> I actually changed it because of that specific conversation you ladies were having. I'm not that mean. But to say someone can post here because their pregnant. There are ladies who are ttc that post in the pregnancy boards.
> 
> Do you not see how this is different?
> 
> And thank you, truly, for changing your sig! :thumbup: Everyone here is genuinely happy for those who succeed in achieving pregnancy.Click to expand...

I agree. I don't care who posts in here, but it would be best to hide your sig so it doesn't hurt anyone. Some of these wonderful ladies have been trying for a very long time, and it really really hurts seeing stuff like that, especially if someone is bragging about how quickly they conceived. :thumbup:


----------



## hunni12

4magpies said:


> I have posted on first tri to HELP ladies who are worried about ectopic as I have experienced it and my information is helpful.
> 
> You posting in a thread for people struggling to conceive is not helpful at all. Especially when you had an "it only took me 2 cycles" la de da signature. So yeah.
> 
> Try putting yourself in our shoes.

Oh.


@Pbl &Jcombs: I truly get what you're saying. It's no problem changing my signature


----------



## jcombs35

I don't have a problem with you at all hunni. I just understand where some of these ladies are coming from.


----------



## wellsk

What a nightmare TTC makes even the simplest of situations! I can completely understand hunni wanting to show the world how fantastic her pregnancy is, and how easily she fell pregnant. 
But at the same time, it's so difficult, because I completely understand the bitterness and hurt behind the other TTC girls wishes.
Why can't life just be simple? And the women who want babies get pregnant straight away :hugs:

By the way, I still don't know who the girl you've said has been gloating is, so I can't send her a message or report her. I've even tried looking with your key phrases and still didn't find her :shrugs:


----------



## laurac1988

How come we always lose those who we love most? How come evil things like cancer always take a 41 year old mum of three instead of an evil criminal? How come when that person leaves you don't know how to cope five years later? Why can't it ever get easier?


----------



## tasha41

> Antisocial, discriminatory or offensive messages and quotes (intended or otherwise) aimed at the community at large, certain demographics (including parenting styles) or specific members, are not permitted.

Ladies this is in response to discussing people's signatures on this thread. It is not appropriate to bash other forum members or their signatures or threads on other posts- even if it is a 'Vent Thread'. *The regular forum rules are still applicable.*

If you have concerns... use the Contact Us link, report posts, or PM a moderator or administrator. I cannot discuss the progress or any reports but if you have done so, the team is aware.

If I come across any posts with reference to this issue in the future, I will be removing them from the thread, as I did the last time I put a warning on this thread (post #225)

You can put any users you find offensive etc on your Ignore List. You won't see their posts or signatures for that matter if you do so.


----------



## pbl_ge

Thank you, Tasha! I actually didn't know about the ignore option, and I didn't see your prior warning.

So, just to clarify, if we see individuals whose posts or signatures are offensive to us (particularly expecting women who are posting frequently in the TTC forums) then we should report them as the first step? 

I just want to make sure I understand proper protocol. 

Thanks, again.


----------



## wellsk

I didn't know you could ignore people either! :dohh:


----------



## Wobbles

An admin input is avoided where possible but I feel I need to further address the issue that has been raised in this thread.


 Members are not required/asked to turn off their signatures in TTC/TTC #1 because they are pregnant.



> These actually AREN'T meant to be open forums. They're meant to be dedicated to those who are in the specified phase, although this isn't strictly enforced.


 This isn't necessarily true, they are meant to be open forums ... members are asked politely (not by rule) to have consideration in more sensitive areas of the forum ... TTC after a loss, LTTTC & assisted conception, etc.
 Expecting Mums/Moms offering support and advice on these boards have usually been on the TTC journey themselves and are simply offering encouraging words at the same time. One day you will be in the same position right? 

Most members who use this section are not LTTTC. We have made BnB a comfortable spot for everyone's journeys ... if you are LTTTC maybe it is best to avoid the more open, less restricted forums.

It is *very *unusual to get an issue within the normal sections of the forum in this case the TTC board. If it was LTTTC I would understand.


----------



## Wobbles

Personal input:
If you haven't used BnB for your TTC journey and found yourself expecting on month #1 congratulations but out of consideration maybe it is best you move straight over to the first trimester. I can see why this would be a problem for some ladies.


Thanks


----------



## Tasha

4magpies said:


> BFN. Why is the would so unfair? Very tempted to go straight for IVF, I hate my body.
> 
> I hate that it doesn't do the job it's meant to do.
> 
> Thank god I have a wonderful OH.
> 
> Can't believe some of the people you are posing about in here. I think twats is the only way to describe them and a very fitting title.
> 
> I cannot go on Facebook any more due to all the kids/preg/babies.
> 
> xxx

I hope you dont hate me for this but I just wanted to say dont give up hope yet, your chart looks fantastic and if your implantation dip was on 7dpo (which it looks like to me) then 9dpo could be HCG of one and then 11dpo would be HCG of two, going by the average double every 48 hours, so plenty of time for a BFP.

I hope you take this in the way I mean it, to offer hope.

I also hope my siggy doesnt offend any one :hugs:


----------



## Oplittleone

wellsk said:


> What a nightmare TTC makes even the simplest of situations! I can completely understand hunni wanting to show the world how fantastic her pregnancy is, and how easily she fell pregnant.
> But at the same time, it's so difficult, because I completely understand the bitterness and hurt behind the other TTC girls wishes.
> Why can't life just be simple? And the women who want babies get pregnant straight away :hugs:
> 
> By the way, I still don't know who the girl you've said has been gloating is, so I can't send her a message or report her. I've even tried looking with your key phrases and still didn't find her :shrugs:


Actually, you CAN'T see where TTC women are coming from. You yourself are NOT TTC yet, and when you have been at this for YEARS with no results, you too will be upset and annoyed over a "19 and pregnant on 2 cycles" signature or advice on TTC coming from that women. 

When you have endured YEARS of heartache and not MONTHS, let us know.


----------



## Tasha

Oplittleone said:


> wellsk said:
> 
> 
> What a nightmare TTC makes even the simplest of situations! I can completely understand hunni wanting to show the world how fantastic her pregnancy is, and how easily she fell pregnant.
> But at the same time, it's so difficult, because I completely understand the bitterness and hurt behind the other TTC girls wishes.
> Why can't life just be simple? And the women who want babies get pregnant straight away :hugs:
> 
> By the way, I still don't know who the girl you've said has been gloating is, so I can't send her a message or report her. I've even tried looking with your key phrases and still didn't find her :shrugs:
> 
> 
> Actually, you CAN'T see where TTC women are coming from. You yourself are NOT TTC yet, and when you have been at this for YEARS with no results, you too will be upset and annoyed over a "19 and pregnant on 2 cycles" signature or advice on TTC coming from that women.
> 
> When you have endured YEARS of heartache and not MONTHS, let us know.Click to expand...

:( We dont have to turn on one another, she was trying to be sympathetic.

Be gentle on each other girls :hugs:


----------



## Oplittleone

Just trying to illustrate that no one can say something like they if they are not going thru it. Just saying......it's kind of patronizing


----------



## wellsk

I'm very sorry to hear that you feel this way oplittleone. And if you'd cared to speak to me first, instead of throwing your insults and assumptions around. You would've found out that before WTT for 2 months to give myself a break, and to make sure that I didn't have a baby in the middle of my exams. You would've found out that I have been TTC since December. No, not a long time in most peoples book, but enough to know the pain of TTC and the disappointment of getting AF every month. 
I'm very hurt that you take away from my desperation for a baby, just because I want him/her to be born into the best possible situation.


----------



## wellsk

P.s.
I don't know you oplittleone, and I wouldn't judge your situation. No, I can't imagine how awful it must be to suffer 4 years of infertility. Which must be very raw for you right now, particularly since you noted that it was pretty much 4 years to the day yesterday. I am very sorry for you. But you don't have to take away from my TTC and WTT journey of the past 2 years (if you include the rest of the time I've waited to try). 

But you were at this point I am at some point. Wouldn't it be better to help each other out and to be empathetic towards others around us. Rather than getting at each other?

I wish you all the best in your TTC journey, even if you do not wish me the same in mine. :hugs:


----------



## J_Lynn

jcombs35 said:


> J_Lynn said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> (when i told her i was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)
> 
> .
> 
> Omfg!!!!!!Click to expand...
> 
> I know... I was like, "Did she just say that?" :growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!? What an insensitive twat!! Can I say that?? I hope that doesn't get me in trouble - but seriously, REALLY?!?! I would have slapped her in the face - it would have just been a reflex LOLClick to expand...
> 
> I wanted to, but I couldn't hit a pregnant woman.... And at the time, I was so stunned that she actually had said that, I couldn't say anything at all!Click to expand...

Ohhh that's true. Yeah, can't slap the pregos around!!


----------



## 4magpies

Tasha said:


> 4magpies said:
> 
> 
> BFN. Why is the would so unfair? Very tempted to go straight for IVF, I hate my body.
> 
> I hate that it doesn't do the job it's meant to do.
> 
> Thank god I have a wonderful OH.
> 
> Can't believe some of the people you are posing about in here. I think twats is the only way to describe them and a very fitting title.
> 
> I cannot go on Facebook any more due to all the kids/preg/babies.
> 
> xxx
> 
> I hope you dont hate me for this but I just wanted to say dont give up hope yet, your chart looks fantastic and if your implantation dip was on 7dpo (which it looks like to me) then 9dpo could be HCG of one and then 11dpo would be HCG of two, going by the average double every 48 hours, so plenty of time for a BFP.
> 
> I hope you take this in the way I mean it, to offer hope.
> 
> I also hope my siggy doesnt offend any one :hugs:Click to expand...

Of course I don't hate you. Thanks for taking the time to look at my chart and for having positive things to say. 

And your signature doesn't offend me at all. 

Testing again saturday, then Monday if no AF. Feel free to peek at my journal if you want to see how I get on. 

Thank you and much love. 

xxx


----------



## Tasha

I didnt notice you had a journal otherwise I would of written it there as it wasnt really a rant or vent :haha:

I would pop there now.


----------



## jcombs35

J_Lynn said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> J_Lynn said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> (when i told her i was having problems conceiving, she laughed and said she wished she did...)
> 
> .
> 
> Omfg!!!!!!Click to expand...
> 
> I know... I was like, "Did she just say that?" :growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!? What an insensitive twat!! Can I say that?? I hope that doesn't get me in trouble - but seriously, REALLY?!?! I would have slapped her in the face - it would have just been a reflex LOLClick to expand...
> 
> I wanted to, but I couldn't hit a pregnant woman.... And at the time, I was so stunned that she actually had said that, I couldn't say anything at all!Click to expand...
> 
> Ohhh that's true. Yeah, can't slap the pregos around!!Click to expand...

Nope, not irl... but you can do quite a bit of it in your mind!!! :haha:


----------



## pbl_ge

Two Un-Vents (is that allowed on a Vent thread?):

1. That ignore list is AWESOME!!!! Access it through your User Control Panel. Took me a few minutes to find it, but it was super easy once I got there.

2. No one on this thread has offended me (well, of the posts I've read--haven't looked all 50 pages). You are all STRONG AMAZING WOMEN, and I wish you wonderful things and lots of 
:dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust: :dust:


----------



## wellsk

4magpies said:


> BFN. Why is the would so unfair? Very tempted to go straight for IVF, I hate my body.
> 
> I hate that it doesn't do the job it's meant to do.
> 
> Thank god I have a wonderful OH.
> 
> Can't believe some of the people you are posing about in here. I think twats is the only way to describe them and a very fitting title.
> 
> I cannot go on Facebook any more due to all the kids/preg/babies.
> 
> xxx

I hope everything works out for you 4magpies! :hugs:


----------



## 4magpies

Another temp rise. 

Argh. 

Stress. I hate waiting!


----------



## lily28

Some people have zero empathy, and are so self centered...


----------



## CaliDreaming

AF is due today or tomorrow, and I've been craving bacon since yesterday afternoon. I get to work this morning, go to the cafeteria with my tastebuds set for bacon and they were OUT of bacon. 

I had made peace with the fact that I would not be getting a baby this cycle, and now apparently the universe has decided that I can't have bacon either. 

Why do even the simplest things in my life go wrong???


----------



## tamithomas

vent of the day: 4 days since AF was supposed to show up. Still getting fekin horrible mixed signals..slept 11 hours but woke up more tired then when I went to bed, all I can think about is kraft dinner mac n cheese but the extra calcium edition but I also get AF cramps on and off. DH wants us to wait until 7 days past due to test aka until Monday. I'm not gonna do the same as last time and set myself up for a disappointment, gonna spend the weekend expecting AF even though in the back of my mind I'm screaming "please after 3 years and 2 months, please let this be it". 

On top of it, bumped into our friend who is 35 weeks along, I wanted to crawl in a hole and die because of seeing how huge her belly was. Woe is me.... lol


----------



## tamithomas

ps: to the girl on my bragbook complaining how just because you haven't conceived a 3rd child and that you fear it's never happen because you haven't conceived in 3 months because hey, your first got conceived on first month of TTC, then the second one got conceived when the first baby was practically fresh out of the womb..shut up!! Your body is sending you a signal to i dunno SLOW DOWN! Don't you dare complain about how you're not getting pregnant on a snap of a finger and throwing a huge drama fit over it. We were already trying when you conceived your first..now you go two, we're still on our first to try.


----------



## 2have4kids

Well three of us at work 1.5 years ago were all joking who'd get preggers first, they're younger than myself by 5 & 2 years. The one 5 years younger had her baby in Feb, the 2 years younger is having his next week and I'm scheduled for IVF next month (maybe, if there's a 'spot'). I've had a chemical and I'm worried about more m/c's due to old eggs. If we did IVF and I m/c I'm going to be beside myself in agony. I want twins now or triplets, I want a family of my own. At 36, everyone else has families with 2-4 kids. 
My husband spends loads of time taking care of his brother's kids & visiting. I feel terribly jealous of the attention he gives them. I know he'll be a great dad and I want his focus to our family (but I haven't been able to give him one). Feel like crying I'm so frustrated...time is passing me by without this dream coming true (to have 4 laughing, crying, giggling, loving, unique, wanting, beautiful kids). Imagine a Sunday dinner with 4 kids? I'm SO sad today.


----------



## tamithomas

this isn't a vent, it's an update on the bragbook situation..surprisingly, her DH set her straight publicly on the status! he said "Honey stop complaining and be greatful already! Some people spend all of their lives trying to conceive and never manage to, meanwhile we got two in the house with us. We're lucky, stop acting so spoiled because for once something is not being served to you at the snap of your finger"


----------



## wellsk

Thank God her Husband has some sense!


----------



## tamithomas

Wellsk, I've seen that page and just like i told my friends i recommend, don't take it so personal. It's just a facebook page, the idiot wants that sort of rage attention...he feeds off of it, just ignore it. The internet is filled with such worse things, that facebook is probably just ran by so immature kid who doesn't know misscarriage or stillborn if it bit him in the ass. Don't get me wrong, I get raged when people joke about rape but it doesn't prevent people from doign it..it's sick, twisted and those people should be shot but in the end..it's only a facebook page, and the page has not actually killed babies. 

Not saying your opinion isn't valued, you have every right to be pissed. I'm just giving the same advice as i gave to my friends over that page.

But lol i totally agree though some peopels stupidity to this day still catches me off guard sometimes


----------



## wellsk

Very true Tami, I just don't understand the mind of the individuals who think it's okay to spout such nonsense!


----------



## tamithomas

a to the men Wellsk, DH and I had a discussion about that very topic last night and we both agree the internet has been letting things go way too far, no one has a sense of moral anymore due to the "freedom" of being able to post anything. And it never fails with the same idiotic excuse when you ask them to please be considerate is "it's the internet, grow some or get out" like excuse me? :dohh:


----------



## Tasha

tamithomas said:


> *a to the men Wellsk, DH and I had a discussion about that very topic last night and we both agree the internet has been letting things go way too far*, no one has a sense of moral anymore due to the "freedom" of being able to post anything. And it never fails with the same idiotic excuse when you ask them to please be considerate is "it's the internet, grow some or get out" like excuse me? :dohh:

I agree with this so much, I think if you wouldnt say it in RL dont say it on the internet but SO many people dont think the same.

I mean I have never heard someone say a babyloss joke or rape joke in RL.


----------



## laustiredttc

some people are cowards in real life hun, the internet is their cloak because if anyone did find out who and what they said they would be up on the wall of shame. 
It's pathetic!!


----------



## tamithomas

Tasha said:


> I agree with this so much, I think if you wouldnt say it in RL dont say it on the internet but SO many people dont think the same.
> 
> I mean I have never heard someone say a babyloss joke or rape joke in RL.

this..this, and all of this!


----------



## tamithomas

vent: getting called jealous by a mombie because I expressed my views on how people on bragbook don't need to know about every piss,poop and burn your kid makes...classic!


----------



## Gunnhilde

tamithomas said:


> vent: getting called jealous by a mombie because I expressed my views on how people on bragbook don't need to know about every piss,poop and burn your kid makes...classic!

Well, you aren't really. I hate people who over post about their kids too. I think it is a little insensitive and self centered to think people are that interested in your offspring.


----------



## laustiredttc

i think the saying it's ok if it's your own is very true. Sometimes when i'm in a store and i hear a kd screeching at the top of its lungs i'm like for petes sake you little :devil: please stop!!! lol


----------



## babymabey

Thank god for somewhere to rant, I have no one to rant to, as no one in my family or my DH's family knows that we are TTC.

My mother won't shut the heck up about me having a kid. EVERYDAY she brings it up. I have told her many times that she needs to back off, but she just laughs and continues to tell me what to do to conceive. My DH and I have 2 dogs, I was telling my mother how they like to sleep between us, she replied with "How do you expect to have a baby one day if you have to worry about crushing the dogs while trying to have sex?" WTH? :shock:

On Monday I had a miscarriage:cry:, a blighted ovum, and I want to tell my mother about it so that maybe she will shut the heck up about me having a kid, but I know that she will turn it around and make it about her (like she did last time), then she will tell the world about it (like she did last time). The last miscarriage was over a year ago, it was unplanned, and I didn't even know I was pregnant until I miscarried. I called to talk to her about it and asked her not to tell anyone because it was no one else's business, not even 5 minutes later my sister called wanting to know if I needed someone to talk to. Then I found out my mother called my grandma crying because she just couldn't handle finding out she lost a grandchild and really needed someone to talk to. :growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:


----------



## HWPG

oh babymabey - so sorry to hear about that! we're here for you!


----------



## J_Lynn

My god-sister just sent me a text and said that she knows how I am trying so hard to have a baby and I am all about babies now, that she wanted me to be the first person to know that she's 3 months pregnant. 

Great. Thanks for telling me. You and your loser boyfriend who break up every 3 weeks are having another child. YAY. I'm so glad. Does this mean he will get a job now? Oh, probably not? Yeah, that sucks. Good thing you'll get food stamps! 

So now I get to sit there for the next 6 months and pretend to be excited for her, while I actually sit there and do what I did just now when she told me - cry. 

I hate everything right now :(


----------



## pbl_ge

j_lynn said:


> my god-sister just sent me a text and said that she knows how i am trying so hard to have a baby and i am all about babies now, that she wanted me to be the first person to know that she's 3 months pregnant.
> 
> Great. Thanks for telling me. You and your loser boyfriend who break up every 3 weeks are having another child. Yay. I'm so glad. Does this mean he will get a job now? Oh, probably not? Yeah, that sucks. Good thing you'll get food stamps!
> 
> So now i get to sit there for the next 6 months and pretend to be excited for her, while i actually sit there and do what i did just now when she told me - cry.
> 
> I hate everything right now :(

a text?!?! Omg.


----------



## tsyhanochka

Coworker sent around her 'big news' to the whole office yesterday... even though we ALL already know she's expecting and have since about June. She sent around the ultrasound photo and announced 'It's a Boy!'.... So I had to endure the congratulations on your million dollar family (she already has a girl) all day yesterday. That put me in a cranky mood for sure. 

We're eloping next week and I know when I'm back at the office and they find out I'm married (we only just got engaged 2 weeks ago) I'll never hear the end of the baby talk about how I'm next...or speculation that I may already be knocked up and crap like that. Which is why I don't plan to 'announce' our marriage... just like I didn't announce our engagement. It took people 4 days to notice my ring which was fine by me. I have finally accepted that I don't like attention and won't share news that will elicit it. 

If I find out that OH and I have genuine fertility issues (we're in cycle 9 now, so it won't be much longer before we seek medical advice)... if I do find out, I honestly have no qualms about telling them at work if they made remarks about being 'next' I feel like I'd be happy to throw it in their faces.... but I know I won't. 

/vent


----------



## J_Lynn

pbl_ge said:


> j_lynn said:
> 
> 
> my god-sister just sent me a text and said that she knows how i am trying so hard to have a baby and i am all about babies now, that she wanted me to be the first person to know that she's 3 months pregnant.
> 
> Great. Thanks for telling me. You and your loser boyfriend who break up every 3 weeks are having another child. Yay. I'm so glad. Does this mean he will get a job now? Oh, probably not? Yeah, that sucks. Good thing you'll get food stamps!
> 
> So now i get to sit there for the next 6 months and pretend to be excited for her, while i actually sit there and do what i did just now when she told me - cry.
> 
> I hate everything right now :(
> 
> a text?!?! Omg.Click to expand...

Yup. 

A dern text. 

She had asked last night and talked to me for 3 hours about everything we are going through and I like cried on the phone to her for the love of everything purple - and she turns around send me this: 

"Hey!! I have some REALLY exciting news for you!!!"

"Ohhh really?? What?!"

"I know how much you want a baby, and how badly you and DH are trying..."

"Ok..?"

"Well, I wanted to tell you last night - but I figured I would just let you have your moment... I AM PREGNANT!!! We weren't even really trying, but you know how fertile I am - I guess it just happened!"

"Are you serious?"

"YES!! How great is that?? You're going to be an aunty!!"

"Oh. Yay."



And that is it. That's all I needed to be sent into an inconsolable weepy mess. She kept talking, but I didn't want to respond. 

Blah. What a b!tch. :cry:


----------



## pbl_ge

J_Lynn said:


> "Oh. Yay."

This response is perfect. :pop:


----------



## Mal2011

Basically I have been tired of my MIL since BEFORE my husband and I were even married.
She didnt show up to her own sons wedding, then weeks later suggested she didnt want to be a grandmother anytime soon.
A few weeks after that statement, my BIL and his GF, who is still legally married and has a kid with her husband, tells us they are pregnant. I WANTED TO RIP EVERYONES FACE OFF!!! 
I am just soooo tired of how my MIL totally supports all that, but can not support her other son being happy?!?! 
I feel like I will always be angry with this woman too. She is so manipulative. 
I havent told anyone but one person, who thankfully was supportive, that we are TTC and on Clomid. 
I just want a precious lil baby. We get so heartbroken when my period shows up.


----------



## BlondeShorty

A girl I went to school with that I genuinely like just announced she's pregnant with baby number 2 tonight. I was excited but kind of jealous. DH and I are supposed to be waiting till July next year, possibly April. I thought I was fine with this. .. Until he turned down :sex: tonight (which was postponed 3 days in a row due to first him being too tired, me feeling too tired and now him being sick :cry:) 

Not only are my friends having their children closer in age (like I secretly want) but I don't even know how long it will take DH and I the second time around since he seems to have almost no sex drive half the time. This doesn't always bug me since it's more a situational thing (long hours at work and comes home not wanting to deal with people due to the stress of job, gets allergies in the summer and spring, we have a 4 month old baby, etc.) but it's really bugging me tonight.. Especially when it's usually me that initiates things (which I don't always mind, but I mean come on!) .. I also realized we've only done the deed about 3 times in the last 4 months.. :cry: It's just been one thing after another and I know it's been legitimate stuff but it's really making me feel crappy and unattractive tonight.


----------



## laustiredttc

J_Lynn said:


> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> j_lynn said:
> 
> 
> my god-sister just sent me a text and said that she knows how i am trying so hard to have a baby and i am all about babies now, that she wanted me to be the first person to know that she's 3 months pregnant.
> 
> Great. Thanks for telling me. You and your loser boyfriend who break up every 3 weeks are having another child. Yay. I'm so glad. Does this mean he will get a job now? Oh, probably not? Yeah, that sucks. Good thing you'll get food stamps!
> 
> So now i get to sit there for the next 6 months and pretend to be excited for her, while i actually sit there and do what i did just now when she told me - cry.
> 
> I hate everything right now :(
> 
> a text?!?! Omg.Click to expand...
> 
> Yup.
> 
> A dern text.
> 
> She had asked last night and talked to me for 3 hours about everything we are going through and I like cried on the phone to her for the love of everything purple - and she turns around send me this:
> 
> "Hey!! I have some REALLY exciting news for you!!!"
> 
> "Ohhh really?? What?!"
> 
> "I know how much you want a baby, and how badly you and DH are trying..."
> 
> "Ok..?"
> 
> "Well, I wanted to tell you last night - but I figured I would just let you have your moment... I AM PREGNANT!!! We weren't even really trying, but you know how fertile I am - I guess it just happened!"
> 
> "Are you serious?"
> 
> "YES!! How great is that?? You're going to be an aunty!!"
> 
> "Oh. Yay."
> 
> 
> 
> And that is it. That's all I needed to be sent into an inconsolable weepy mess. She kept talking, but I didn't want to respond.
> 
> Blah. What a b!tch. :cry:Click to expand...

this is damn right insensitive and its clear she knew what she was doing!!! i would just AVOID AVOID AVOID :growl:


----------



## lily28

I'm in awe of the non ending stupidity and insensitivity of some people...
J_Lynn, this is one of the most vile stories I've heard, I think it was meant to hurt you, totally on purpose. Are you going to keep in contact with her? I don't think I could... She was malicious and knew exactly what she was saying to you. What a terrible person :(


----------



## laustiredttc

i totally 100% agree. How can someone be so cruel? i hope that jlynn you do get your :bfp: soon huni then you can rub it in her face.


----------



## CaliDreaming

J_Lynn said:


> My god-sister just sent me a text and said that she knows how I am trying so hard to have a baby and I am all about babies now, that she wanted me to be the first person to know that she's 3 months pregnant.
> 
> Great. Thanks for telling me. You and your loser boyfriend who break up every 3 weeks are having another child. YAY. I'm so glad. Does this mean he will get a job now? Oh, probably not? Yeah, that sucks. Good thing you'll get food stamps!
> 
> So now I get to sit there for the next 6 months and pretend to be excited for her, while I actually sit there and do what I did just now when she told me - cry.
> 
> I hate everything right now :(

^^^^^ This heffa here....:nope:I am speechless.:nope:

I feel sorry for her baby. That is not a great situation for a child.

It sounds like she doesn't have much going for her and her fertility is the only thing she can do right.


----------



## CaliDreaming

Vent of the day: I spent an arm and a leg on a clear blue easy fertility monitor and was all set on using it this morning. I get it out of the box and discover that is has no batteries. :dohh:

As much as I have paid for this damn thing the least they could have done was include some f'ing batteries.


----------



## tamithomas

2 vents today: 

number one) Where oh where are you AF? Please stay away as I'm 5 days late, but please don't do a nasty one on me and show up on test day monday. I think I will eat the whole tub of ice cream in my freezer if that happens.

number two) not a vent but more like guilt. My best friend has been soo excited more than me about being 5 days late, I swear it's like as if she was the one that might possible be BFP lol but.. She's been diagnosed with PCOS like level expert of it since she was 14 and hasn't realized yet that this will impact her fertility major. In one sense, I want to tell her what PCOS does to fertility but on the other hand, I don't want to a bubble crusher of her dreams. She just had to be prescribed a pill to start her period because she ended up on a 70 something day long cycle. I feel soo horrible for her but then again, the fact I've been facing infertility ofr 3 years at least when she will start trying and finds out the true pains of IF, I will be able to be there for her completely as I know where she's been and coming from.


----------



## tamithomas

J_Lynn said:


> pbl_ge said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> j_lynn said:
> 
> 
> my god-sister just sent me a text and said that she knows how i am trying so hard to have a baby and i am all about babies now, that she wanted me to be the first person to know that she's 3 months pregnant.
> 
> Great. Thanks for telling me. You and your loser boyfriend who break up every 3 weeks are having another child. Yay. I'm so glad. Does this mean he will get a job now? Oh, probably not? Yeah, that sucks. Good thing you'll get food stamps!
> 
> So now i get to sit there for the next 6 months and pretend to be excited for her, while i actually sit there and do what i did just now when she told me - cry.
> 
> I hate everything right now :(
> 
> a text?!?! Omg.Click to expand...
> 
> Yup.
> 
> A dern text.
> 
> She had asked last night and talked to me for 3 hours about everything we are going through and I like cried on the phone to her for the love of everything purple - and she turns around send me this:
> 
> "Hey!! I have some REALLY exciting news for you!!!"
> 
> "Ohhh really?? What?!"
> 
> "I know how much you want a baby, and how badly you and DH are trying..."
> 
> "Ok..?"
> 
> "Well, I wanted to tell you last night - but I figured I would just let you have your moment... I AM PREGNANT!!! We weren't even really trying, but you know how fertile I am - I guess it just happened!"
> 
> "Are you serious?"
> 
> "YES!! How great is that?? You're going to be an aunty!!"
> 
> "Oh. Yay."
> 
> 
> 
> And that is it. That's all I needed to be sent into an inconsolable weepy mess. She kept talking, but I didn't want to respond.
> 
> Blah. What a b!tch. :cry:Click to expand...

My heart just sunk to the floor just reading that. OMG how insensitive! "we weren't even really trying" wow I'm raging just reading this :growlmad: gosh some people are horrible!


----------



## J_Lynn

lily28 said:


> I'm in awe of the non ending stupidity and insensitivity of some people...
> J_Lynn, this is one of the most vile stories I've heard, I think it was meant to hurt you, totally on purpose. Are you going to keep in contact with her? I don't think I could... She was malicious and knew exactly what she was saying to you. What a terrible person :(




laustiredttc said:


> i totally 100% agree. How can someone be so cruel? i hope that jlynn you do get your :bfp: soon huni then you can rub it in her face.

Her number got deleted out of my phone and I deleted her on facebook also. She makes me so mad :( My real sister went off on her, she was LIVID and was like "That trashy broad had the audacity to say that to you?!?" and it was on from that point. 

My sister is like my biggest advocate; she hates kids - but has already said numerous times that she will be a surrogate for me whenever I need it. She got pregnant back when she was 15, and ended up giving the baby up for adoption (absolutely the best choice) and had I not been just 18 and clearly not financially able to care for a child at that age - I would have adopted her baby. But at that time I didn't know I was cursed. :wacko:

But yeah, my "godsister" is out of my life; I agree - she clearly just did that to be hurtful :cry:


----------



## J_Lynn

My vent for the day: 

I haven't stopped bleeding since my HSG. That was on Wednesday - AF just ended 2 days before my HSG. WTF is going on? BODY, I HATE YOU RIGHT NOW.


----------



## tamithomas

DH,thank you for confirming why telling you only 5 days late was a bad thing. You just killed any little hope I had by telling me "you period is probably just late". I understand about being doubtful but damn, I hope it's just your lack of sleep that made you have that reaction. Now I gotta wait three hours to find out why you were so moody when I told you.


----------



## nic18

tamithomas said:


> DH,thank you for confirming why telling you only 5 days late was a bad thing. You just killed any little hope I had by telling me "you period is probably just late". I understand about being doubtful but damn, I hope it's just your lack of sleep that made you have that reaction. Now I gotta wait three hours to find out why you were so moody when I told you.


My OH said this to me last month, and i was fuming! (he was right) but really annoyed me by saying it lol


----------



## tamithomas

lol yea, men can sure be blunt at times! I'm just very rarely ever late like this. The only times I was horrible on the CD's was when I was still a heavy drinker of energy drinks which I have not touched. That kind of reaction almost wants me to just test alone on Monday. He is napping right now so hopefully when he wakes up we can resolve whatever the heck went through his head when he said it. Men, gotta love to hate them lol


----------



## nic18

they just don't use there brains half the time! i'm sure when he wakes up he will explain. don't test yourself i know things like that make you want to but its nice to test together :) although i have to say i have wanted to test myself sometimes because of OH and his silly mouth :)


----------



## Gunnhilde

Dear facebook friend,

Please stop posting like 10 pictures of your kids a day. We all know that you had them taken away 6/7 months ago and that you were charged with child endangerment and animal abuse. Stop putting on a show since they were returned last week. Seriously. :growlmad:


----------



## tamithomas

nic18 said:


> they just don't use there brains half the time! i'm sure when he wakes up he will explain. don't test yourself i know things like that make you want to but its nice to test together :) although i have to say i have wanted to test myself sometimes because of OH and his silly mouth :)

I'm pretty sure things will be fine when he wakes up :) It's not like him to be so negative about something that is good that has potential to change his life. We've always vowed to test together and to check the results together. Until monday though, I got a box of tampons and a tub of cheesecake ice cream in the freezer ;)


----------



## tamithomas

Gunnhilde: I hate those type of bragbook users no matter the circumstances. Especially those who know that someone is TTC.


----------



## nic18

tamithomas said:


> nic18 said:
> 
> 
> they just don't use there brains half the time! i'm sure when he wakes up he will explain. don't test yourself i know things like that make you want to but its nice to test together :) although i have to say i have wanted to test myself sometimes because of OH and his silly mouth :)
> 
> I'm pretty sure things will be fine when he wakes up :) It's not like him to be so negative about something that is good that has potential to change his life. We've always vowed to test together and to check the results together. Until monday though, I got a box of tampons and a tub of cheesecake ice cream in the freezer ;)Click to expand...

haha! ice-cream helps everything :) maybe a bit chocolate to :laugh2:


----------



## tamithomas

nic18 said:


> tamithomas said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> nic18 said:
> 
> 
> they just don't use there brains half the time! i'm sure when he wakes up he will explain. don't test yourself i know things like that make you want to but its nice to test together :) although i have to say i have wanted to test myself sometimes because of OH and his silly mouth :)
> 
> I'm pretty sure things will be fine when he wakes up :) It's not like him to be so negative about something that is good that has potential to change his life. We've always vowed to test together and to check the results together. Until monday though, I got a box of tampons and a tub of cheesecake ice cream in the freezer ;)Click to expand...
> 
> haha! ice-cream helps everything :) maybe a bit chocolate to :laugh2:Click to expand...

yuuuuuum! Can't go wrong with chocolate haha


----------



## zoomlentil

tamithomas said:


> nic18 said:
> 
> 
> they just don't use there brains half the time! i'm sure when he wakes up he will explain. don't test yourself i know things like that make you want to but its nice to test together :) although i have to say i have wanted to test myself sometimes because of OH and his silly mouth :)
> 
> I'm pretty sure things will be fine when he wakes up :) It's not like him to be so negative about something that is good that has potential to change his life. We've always vowed to test together and to check the results together. Until monday though, I got a box of tampons and a tub of cheesecake ice cream in the freezer ;)Click to expand...

Sorry to hear your OH was a bit of a downer. :( Keeping FXd for you!

ps: OMG you can get cheesecake ice-cream!? Where!?! :haha:


----------



## tamithomas

zoomlentil: Believe it or not, in my little town in the middle of nowhere in Roberval, Quebec! I died when I found it.


----------



## babymabey

Seriously, men sometimes. I had a miscarriage from a blighted ovum on Monday. On Tuesday when DH got home from work I was crying he asked why I was sad and I gave him the are-you-kidding look. I said "I'm sorry, I guess it will take more than 24 hours to feel ago about this." to which he replied "So what, it will take you 2 days." I started bawling:cry:, he swears he was just trying to make me laugh, but I think he was mad at me because I was so anxious to see if I was pregnant when I took my test a week earlier (I was expecting it to be negative, so I was going to test and then not tell him about it) so he wasn't home at the time, and when the test came up positive I was so surprised that I called him at work, I think he was hurt that he didn't get to be there then I tested. (Next time I will wait for him to be there).
I have learned that getting a positive pregnancy tests catapults us into a false sense of security:nope:. Like nothing can go wrong from that point, you got a BFP so of course the next step is a baby. How wrong is that sometimes.
Anyway, we were talking the other night before bed and he seemed a little sad so I asked what was up, he said that if I had only listened and waited until I was a week late to test we wouldn't be going through this, and maybe if I would have calmed down looking at websites and just assuming everything would be fine, that he wouldn't be so hurt about me not really being pregnant. Then he apologized for sounding so cold and said he didn't blame me for the pregnancy ending from a blighted ovum. I am still hurt by what he said though.

I love him to death, but DH is definitely getting on my nerves a little the last week. I guess it is just PMS making things worse. Sorry for the long rant just needed to talk to someone about what he said to me.:cry::cry:


----------



## J_Lynn

babymabey said:


> Seriously, men sometimes. I had a miscarriage from a blighted ovum on Monday. On Tuesday when DH got home from work I was crying he asked why I was sad and I gave him the are-you-kidding look. I said "I'm sorry, I guess it will take more than 24 hours to feel ago about this." to which he replied "So what, it will take you 2 days." I started bawling:cry:, he swears he was just trying to make me laugh, but I think he was mad at me because I was so anxious to see if I was pregnant when I took my test a week earlier (I was expecting it to be negative, so I was going to test and then not tell him about it) so he wasn't home at the time, and when the test came up positive I was so surprised that I called him at work, I think he was hurt that he didn't get to be there then I tested. (Next time I will wait for him to be there).
> I have learned that getting a positive pregnancy tests catapults us into a false sense of security:nope:. Like nothing can go wrong from that point, you got a BFP so of course the next step is a baby. How wrong is that sometimes.
> Anyway, we were talking the other night before bed and he seemed a little sad so I asked what was up, he said that if I had only listened and waited until I was a week late to test we wouldn't be going through this, and maybe if I would have calmed down looking at websites and just assuming everything would be fine, that he wouldn't be so hurt about me not really being pregnant. Then he apologized for sounding so cold and said he didn't blame me for the pregnancy ending from a blighted ovum. I am still hurt by what he said though.
> 
> I love him to death, but DH is definitely getting on my nerves a little the last week. I guess it is just PMS making things worse. Sorry for the long rant just needed to talk to someone about what he said to me.:cry::cry:

It was the wrong time for him to even attempt to make a joke, and it is completely OK for you to feel that way. :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:


----------



## zoomlentil

tamithomas said:


> zoomlentil: Believe it or not, in my little town in the middle of nowhere in Roberval, Quebec! I died when I found it.

I'll bet. We don't have anything that interesting here in Oz! Although there is an awesome ice creamery here that makes their own flavours.. maybe I should drop them a hint!


----------



## tamithomas

Is there something in the water? What is up with DH's being asses lately. :hugs: babymabey !


----------



## Storked

Dear relative that I love,
Don't start talking like you are a baby expert just because you just gave birth. And don't tell me to remember everything that you are saying to me because I will have one of my own someday.
I had one. I lost it.
Thoughtless jerk.


----------



## 2have4kids

babymabey said:


> Seriously, men sometimes. I had a miscarriage from a blighted ovum on Monday. On Tuesday when DH got home from work I was crying he asked why I was sad and I gave him the are-you-kidding look. I said "I'm sorry, I guess it will take more than 24 hours to feel ago about this." to which he replied "So what, it will take you 2 days." I started bawling:cry:, he swears he was just trying to make me laugh, but I think he was mad at me because I was so anxious to see if I was pregnant when I took my test a week earlier (I was expecting it to be negative, so I was going to test and then not tell him about it) so he wasn't home at the time, and when the test came up positive I was so surprised that I called him at work, I think he was hurt that he didn't get to be there then I tested. (Next time I will wait for him to be there).
> I have learned that getting a positive pregnancy tests catapults us into a false sense of security:nope:. Like nothing can go wrong from that point, you got a BFP so of course the next step is a baby. How wrong is that sometimes.
> Anyway, we were talking the other night before bed and he seemed a little sad so I asked what was up, he said that if I had only listened and waited until I was a week late to test we wouldn't be going through this, and maybe if I would have calmed down looking at websites and just assuming everything would be fine, that he wouldn't be so hurt about me not really being pregnant. Then he apologized for sounding so cold and said he didn't blame me for the pregnancy ending from a blighted ovum. I am still hurt by what he said though.
> 
> I love him to death, but DH is definitely getting on my nerves a little the last week. I guess it is just PMS making things worse. Sorry for the long rant just needed to talk to someone about what he said to me.:cry::cry:

Insensitive. My husband is british (no offense to the lovely brits with the comment I'm about to make) and loves to crack mean spirited jokes. We lost our 8 year old cat 1 year ago and 2 months after loosing him I had a wee cry...OH lectured that we're done with that and it's time to move on. Well, let me just compartmentalize those feelings for you so that I can be the robot wife of your fking dreams you arsehole. Massive blow out that evening. This little cat used to snuggle us when we woke up & kneed us like a kitten nuzzling nose under chin before bed. He was such a gorgeous little fuzzball. Men can be so insensitive sometimes, you need to educate them the way you want to be treated. Hopefully he won't make that mistake again. I've changed my avatar to remember my little guy.


----------



## tamithomas

turns out I was right, it was a misunderstanding. If anything he's been giddy and excited all day!


----------



## MissOleiane

To me : STOP looking at your chart on FF 20 times a day. Nothing will change magically!


----------



## ChartsNHearts

MissOleiane said:


> To me : STOP looking at your chart on FF 20 times a day. Nothing will change magically!

:haha: I was just telling myself the same thing! I chart on TCOYF and have just spent hours looking at BFP charts to see if I can find some that compare to mine! Not so much giving myself hope, as driving myself mad! :wacko:


----------



## AlyCon

To my mother in law:

*"*Just because your son is the breadwinner in our marriage does NOT MEAN you get to demand money whenever you want it!! You are NOT HIS WIFE, *I AM*! Therefore his money is NOT your money its OUR money, meaning his and MINE! If you send me one more text saying *"tell *DH's name* to put $20 in my account. Thanks"* im gonna rip your f*cking head off because while it may seem harmless there are actually quite a few things wrong with that text message:

1. Tell him? or ASK him? Because the last time i checked you are supposed to ASK some one when you need a favor, not demand that it be given to you.

2. Whats with the "thanks" like you just know you're going to get it?? once again, when you need something you are supposed to ASK, wait for an answer, then say thank you IF you get it. Your sense of entitlement is really starting to piss me off!!

3. YOU DONT KNOW WHAT OUR FINANCES ARE LIKE!! You have no f*cking clue how much money we have! So for you to keep sticking your handout demanding money like we're your own personal ATM is really inconsiderate seeing as we could be on our last dime just barely getting by. But again, you wouldnt know!! 

We are 19 and 20 years old living off 1 income! Your son is an E-2 in the army, so we arent exactly rolling in dough over here! yes, we are better off than some other couples our age, but that doesnt make us millionares. Yes we have savings but thats because unlike you we actually know how to manage our money. And part of being financially responsible is not giving all your money away to other people, especially if those people have poor spending habits! If you want to blow all your money on bullshit, thats your business, but dont expect us to let you blow ours too! Cuz it aint gonna happen!! *The next time you stick your hand out i'm chopping it off!!" *:growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:


----------



## HWPG

Best friend called. Pregnant. Second month of no protection. Awesome. There are not enough tissues in my house.


----------



## babymabey

My rant of the day:

I am about ready to delete my dang Facebook account. I am so sick of logging on and seeing all these people announcing their pregnancies. Of course they are not doing it intentionally because no one knows that my husband and I are TTC, it just hurts to log on and see all my family members and friends posting their U/S pictures, and talking about how amazing they feel, and how easy it was to get pregnant, and how they can't wait to hold that baby.


----------



## AlyCon

babymabey said:


> My rant of the day:
> 
> I am about ready to delete my dang Facebook account. I am so sick of logging on and seeing all these people announcing their pregnancies. Of course they are not doing it intentionally because no one knows that my husband and I are TTC, it just hurts to log on and see all my family members and friends posting their U/S pictures, and talking about how amazing they feel, and how easy it was to get pregnant, and how they can't wait to hold that baby.

I'm right there with you! i've had to hide people from my newsfeed because i just cant take seeing the ultrasounds, bumps, and newborns!! And even though they're hidden sometimes i cant help but go to their profiles to look! :dohh: omg im pathetic, i just want it to be my turn already :cry: TTC is making me depressed and crazy!


----------



## 4magpies

Fuck off AF. 

You horrible horrible witch.


----------



## J_Lynn

Today, my Drs nurse called me to check up on me after the HSG and I told her I was still bleeding - she said most likely it's my period that came back from having things done to my cervix; and that this cycle was a bust. I've been bleeding since Wednesday :( She said if I am still bleeding thursday, that I can call and I'll come in and see my Dr. 

I have spent the morning crying. Nothing ever works out for me.


----------



## kassiaethne

ugh so all those positive tests I got were either super earily or whatever but all the doctor tests say nopers. can't do anything about fertility though until we are for sure certain that I am not pregnant....so I get to wait another week in limbo to be sure I don't get my period (if the spotting at 7dpo wasn't a period) and then test again to see what comes out on a magical pee stick...

so my rant: Fuck you sticks....either give me a positive and be positive or give me a negative so I'm not in pregnant limbo....I want my baby already and you teasing me like this is hurting my heart....


----------



## jcombs35

Oh Kass. I've been thinking about you a lot lately. Sounds like you're going through what I did. I'm still waiting til Friday when AF is due to go back for another doctor's test, and I'm up to 17 positives.... but still very nervous. Praying for you hun.


----------



## kassiaethne

yeah thank you, I am just so confused on everything and I really hope I am pregnant, this limbo is killing me. I had 4 positives but then I went to the doctors and they were like nope negatives. so now I'm just told wait a week and test again and we will go from there. ahosidaoshdao why can't I have an answer now!!!! thank you for your prayers they are certainly appreciated and make me feel less alone in all this.


----------



## tamithomas

vent: oh joy,bumped into our 35 week pregnant friend at the mall. Whom I have been purposely avoiding since she started showing. I hate the curtious "how's the baby?" talks, they're like nails on a chalk board.


----------



## HWPG

have you guys seen this article? why didnt one of US make/market this?

https://www.hlntv.com/article/2012/08/02/unbaby-scrubs-facebook-baby-photos?hpt=hp_t3


----------



## kassiaethne

lol yeah I posted a thread about that a little bit ago for everyone to get ^_^ I know its helped me alot


----------



## laurac1988

Sick of peoples inability to use google or a forum search function!


----------



## Gunnhilde

HWPG said:


> have you guys seen this article? why didnt one of US make/market this?
> 
> https://www.hlntv.com/article/2012/08/02/unbaby-scrubs-facebook-baby-photos?hpt=hp_t3

I installed it on my Chrome. Didn't work :cry:


----------



## kassiaethne

clear cache then reopen chrome, it should work after that


----------



## Odi

random vent for the day......:growlmad:

AAAAAAHGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! stoopid offshore work!!!! why do you have to do this job DP?????money is not everything.... far out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant do this by myself.. i cant be alone for 2 months and have u home for 2 weeks.... :cry::cry::cry::cry:

please please [-o&lt;[-o&lt;.... find another job.. one where i can see you and get a cuddle from you when i honestly need you here with me.. i cant do this alone.. i need you home......... :cry::cry:

](*,)](*,)](*,)](*,)](*,)](*,)](*,)


----------



## Knightcla

I am also tired of pregnant people bragging to me about their wonderful baby bumps, 
and then complaining about how terrible it is to be pregnant.
When there's people like us who are trying and trying and want babies.

every one around me is getting pregnant and I wanna crawl under a rock and give them the evil eye.


----------



## 4magpies

Worst AF pains ever this month. 

Sucks. 

Also confused to why my temp didn't drop below cover line before AF and still hasn't dropped!

xxx


----------



## jojolabobo

Vent for today!

WHY has it been 2 and half weeks since my GP referred me to the fertility specalist about my PCOS and I still havent heard anything!!!! 

Maybe I'm being impatient but honestly...I'm literally going insane!

I've become an obsesive compulsive googler...today I can't stop googling clomid! Just want to have something to work towards I'm soooo sick of waiting around.

Worst part is I work with a Psychiatrist and he keeps giving me funny looks, if this goes on much longer they are going to realise I've lost it and admit me onto one of our psychiatric wards haha!


----------



## LizzieJane

I HATE the fact that my lack of periods are probably due to stress and I HATE the fact that there seems to be nothing I can do about this!!! ARGH?!


----------



## 4magpies

jojolabobo said:


> Vent for today!
> 
> WHY has it been 2 and half weeks since my GP referred me to the fertility specalist about my PCOS and I still havent heard anything!!!!
> 
> Maybe I'm being impatient but honestly...I'm literally going insane!
> 
> I've become an obsesive compulsive googler...today I can't stop googling clomid! Just want to have something to work towards I'm soooo sick of waiting around.
> 
> Worst part is I work with a Psychiatrist and he keeps giving me funny looks, if this goes on much longer they are going to realise I've lost it and admit me onto one of our psychiatric wards haha!

I'd expect to wait a while for a referral tbh. Maybe a month of more. 

Also they won't give you clomid straight away. You'll need a hsg first. Hope time passes quickly for you. 

xxx


----------



## LKPone

jojolabobo said:


> WHY has it been 2 and half weeks since my GP referred me to the fertility specalist about my PCOS and I still havent heard anything!!!!
> 
> Maybe I'm being impatient but honestly...I'm literally going insane!
> 
> I've become an obsesive compulsive googler...today I can't stop googling clomid! Just want to have something to work towards I'm soooo sick of waiting around.

Just to give you a snapshot of what you could expect - you probably haven't been referred to a FS, but rather to the a general gynae to start with. I was referred to a gynae ward first from the GP - completely useless exercise, but that's the NHS for you. :dohh: I think it took about 2 or 3 months before I actually saw anybody. Spent 5 months with them, saw them at the beginning and end of those 5 months and achieved absolutely nothing at all before being discharged from there and referred to the Fertility Specialist - now we're talking! BUT.... there was a waiting list of 18 weeks! :wacko: But I convinced them that since I'd been given Clomid by my private doctor in South Africa, who I'd gone to for an opinion (I can't even say 'second opinion' because the NHS STILL hadn't diagnosed my PCOS yet!), I couldn't wait that long to have another round of treatment, so they gave me an appointment in 3 weeks.

But it's a long, hard road on the NHS and all I can say is that you'll get there eventually, but I don't doubt that you'll have loads more rants about the process - in fact, my first vent on this thread was about that exact thing! :haha:


----------



## LKPone

4magpies said:


> Also they won't give you clomid straight away. You'll need a hsg first. Hope time passes quickly for you.
> 
> xxx

Not necessarily... I haven't had my HSG yet and I've been given 6 rounds of Clomid to get me going :thumbup: That's because the Lap & Dye has a waiting list of 3 months - I went for my FS appointment over a month ago and I still haven't heard anything about my lap & dye appointment. :wacko: 

Depends on each individual case, but I mostly agree that they probably won't give you Clomid until you're with the Fertility Specialist.... in fact, I know that, because the gynae ward I was with told me that they aren't allowed to prescribe it! :growlmad:


----------



## 4magpies

Lap and dye isn't a hsg. The NHS don't tend to waste clomid so they like to know your tubes are patent. Plus there's no point in wasting time trying clomid if your tubes aren't damaged. 

If you've already been perscribed clomid they tend to assume you have no tubal issues as you should have been checked for that. 

I've been right through the NHS gynae and FS system as I've had gynae probs since I was 20. Just waiting to get re referred as had to start again with my new partner. I got as far as being perscubed clomid last time after it taking them 2 years of consultant care to diagnose me. Idiots. This is after 3 laps, a hsg and an ectopic!

xx


----------



## jcombs35

God, my MIL can be stupid! We are planning a trip to Indiana in a couple weeks and have been working to get our vehicle in better condition. Last week, DH jokingly said that she should let us take her truck, which is nicer. She didn't say anything the whole way home, and just the other day I found out through BIL that she was angry and talking a bunch of crap. She thought DH was serious about it, even though BIL told her he was joking. She's still mad, and posting subtle things on facebook about how people just want to use her.

Why is it she can show so much emotion over something so incredibly stupid, and then tell me I probably just had a miscarriage without feeling a drop of any emotion? She is only happy when everyone has their heads up her rear end, and God forbid anyone ask a favor. Then she tries to talk down about DH to me about everything he needs to do and not do. No, he's not perfect, and yes, there is a lot of room for improvement, but look who raised him?

She had him very young, actually was on her 4th at age 22. She liked to party and had horrible boyfriends who treated her sons like crap. She's always been cold. She didn't cuddle them, tell them she loved them, or really show any interest in their life. So now that she's older she wants to come back and wonder why they are the way they are?

My hubby has issues. I won't deny it. But he works hard to support his family, and he loves his kids and shows it a hell of a lot better than she ever could. He's turned out quite well despite her horrible parenting. Now she wants to disown us because of a stupid freakin joke?


----------



## jojolabobo

4magpies and LKPone! Thanks soo much for the advice. My Doctor didn't explain any of that. What is a HSG? I don't know anyone else who has been through anything like this before soo I completely didn't know what to expect.

I asked my doctor if I should expect a long wait and she was quite dismissive and when I pressed said not really. Don't know if she just wanted me off her case but if I know I've got a long wait then I can get myself in the right mindset.

I'm glad I vented now, at least I have a better idea of what to expect. Thanks Ladies :) XX


----------



## 4magpies

A HSG is a special X-ray with dye injected into your uterus to check your tubes flow as they should. 

It's a quick procedure and I guess you'll be sent for an ultrasound too to check your ovaries and linings for any problems. Have you also had CD5 and CD21 bloods yet? Your OH will prob be sent for a SA too if he hasn't had one already. 

And happy to help. Feel free to message me if you need to know anything else. 

xxx


----------



## LKPone

4magpies said:


> A HSG is a special X-ray with dye injected into your uterus to check your tubes flow as they should.

Yeah... that's the 'dye' part of the lap & dye procedure, isn't it? :wacko: If not, then I'm just as clueless as you 4magpies, because that's what I've thought all along that I'm waiting for! :nope:

I was told that some local authorities do them separately (the HSG first) and some do them at the same time - mine just happens to do them at the same time.


----------



## 4magpies

A lap and dye is a laparoscopy and dye which is key hole surgery and you are under general anaesthetic. They insert a camera in to your pelvic cavity after cutting you open. Ive had 3 of these. A hsg in comparison is less invasive, it's done whilst awake and a catheter is used to insert slightly radioactive dye into your uterus/tubes and X-ray is used to see what's going on. 

And I'm far from clueless lol!! I wish I was!!

xxx


----------



## 4magpies

And I've had both because the hsg shows inside the tubes in more detail. 

The lap and dye only shows that they do flow, and you can only see the outside of the tubes. 

Hence why my old FS sent me for both. 

xxx


----------



## J_Lynn

I really liked my HSG ... I know that sounds weird, but I was happy to actually see what in the world was going on in there. I took a hydro before I went to pretty much get rid of all the pain, it only hurt for a total of maybe 3 seconds - and it wasn't bad pain, more like light cramping pain. My doctor is amazing and really helped I think; the better the doctor the less horrid the process lol

Magpies - did you bleed for a long time after your HSG? I had mine last Wednesday, and I am still bleeding! I don't get it. The Dr said if it doesn't stop by Thursday, then I should come in. But blah - I don't know if this is normal.


----------



## Feisty Fidget

I only had spotting for a few hours after my HSG - I would get it checked out J_Lynn as my Nurse advised it could be a sign of irritation/infection if it lasted for more then a few days. I'm sure it's nothing, but always best to get it checked out :)


----------



## sojourn

Not an angry vent, but a vent none the less. 

I feel so alone. 

My family doesn't understand my concerns for my fertility. Yes I am young, yes my family has a history of being prolific beyond belief at spawning. However, being on depo for 10+ years has be concerned. Whenever I express this concern they laugh at me and remind me that by virtue of having my last name I should already be pregnant. They are trying to reassure me, but it isn't working. 

My friends are fairly young. Those that had children either had them unplanned or through not trying but not preventing. They are also disinterested and can't offer much information. 

Even the internet has betrayed me. Everyone talks in this cryptic short hand that is impossible to understand. I spend so much time trying to decipher all of the CD5 DTD eod, blah blah that I can barely get any information. Even with the helpful post someone made to translate, it takes me so long to get past all of the random letters and numbers that I have a hard time getting to the actual information. I know it's just people's language that they are using because it is easier, but it makes me feel even MORE isolated and alone. Like, if I can't learn this special language, then I don't get to have access to support or information. I'm trying, but it is disheartening. 

Blah...

Also, I'm sorry guys. I know basically everyone on all of these sites use these words, but I can't bring myself to understand/like them. 
Baby dancing??!!!!!!!!!! WHAT?! I thought this was actually babies dancing, or maybe dancing like a baby. It's so weird to me! I can't wrap my brain around it. I guess it's like a cutesy euphemism??
My grandma told me once (when she overheard a friend of mine using some kind of euphemism for sex) "It's called sex!! If you can't say it then you sure as hell shouldn't be doing it". I'm not saying that people on this board should not be having sex (duh! That would make conception difficult!). I was raised to use the names of things penis, vagina and sex. So the baby dancing thing is soooo weird to me!! 

Also I get weird if people will get upset or offended if I just say "sex" instead. Will they? I don't mean to hurt anyone's feelings, but please? Can I please just say the word sex?

Along the same lines...baby dust? eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!!! Given people's little fairy thing that is there when they say it, I *think* it is a play on fairy dust and seems to be some kind of luck thing. I think of babies being made into dust. This is the opposite of what I want. Am I such a complete outsider weirdo for getting skeeved out by baby dust?

Oh my. I really don't mean to offend anyone. These are JUST my weird thoughts and I don't know where else I can possibly release them.


----------



## wellsk

:hugs:

Don't worry Sojourn, it sounds like you're quite new to all this internet jazz? You will soon learn all the lingo... and even the best of us I think probably have moments where we're like 'what does that mean?'. You will eventually get used to some, and you will use the ones you're comfortable with.

I don't mind using the term DTD (doing the deed), but I would normally say 'sex' or 'intercourse'. I don't think anyone's going to mind you say that instead, we're all grown ups here :thumbup:

I think you'll probably find you'll get used to it really. The 'baby dust' thing is just another way of wishing women luck on the boards for TTC.


----------



## Feisty Fidget

sojourn when I first joined I used to have a seperate google page open to decipher abbreviations :haha: 2 years on and I am fluent :) It is easier to write as takes up less time etc.

We are all here for you and I don't think anyone would get offended by SEX we are after all, all doing it ;)


----------



## HWPG

got a text from best friend "dr confirmed pregnancy! baby due in april!" then another one saying "you and OH need to get busy so we can have babies together!" - so i wrote back "it's not for lack of trying" - but i wanted to write: i would LOVE to get pregnant! let me just f-ing get right on that! oh what? i've been trying for 7 months, actively, and you NTNP twice and BFP? where's my magic wand? where's my rewind button for life? i should have been the one sending YOU that message, not the other way around.
then i wanted to crawl into a hole because i'm a bad friend.


----------



## 2012ttc

you so not a bad friend HWPG! I soo know where your coming from, its so frustrating. Even on here, people complaining to be pregnant. ohhh what I would give for morning sickness! EVERYWHERE I go I see pregnant women, usually ones with 10 kids, none of which are wearing shoes or pants..jsut tshirts and diapers. Ugh.


----------



## wellsk

:hugs: 

Oh HWPG, I'm so sorry. That must be so awful for you! :(
You're not a bad friend at all, if you were a bad friend you would've actually said those things to her. But you thought about how she would feel and you kept it to yourself. I think the way you're feeling is totally normal!
Fingers crossed for you sweet :hugs:


----------



## sojourn

Thanks folks! I am glad I won't get kicked off for saying a dirty word or something. I get that we're all grown-ups, but it just seem everyone's talking about sex like nervous teenagers. Lots of quotation marks (ie. "trying"), giggles, apologies and tittering. 
Makes sense though, most societies are so weird about sex we are programmed to not talk about it out loud. It's ok. I'm sure I'll get used to people wishing me luck with peeing on a stick and baby dust. 

You are not a bad friend!!! It's hard and scary. Even before I was married and trying and wanting to have kids immediately I would get SO MAD when my friends would get pregnant! Even this year, actively taking birth control, one of my "wild" friends (who settled down some before, but still) got pregnant on accident. I was jealous and cranky.

You get to be jealous and cranky, you just don't get to rain on her parade. That's why you vent here and then smile and nod in real life.


----------



## wellsk

You've hit the nail on the head there Sojourn. In many cultures it's not acceptable to talk about sex with other people, even sometimes with your OH. Sometimes even just how you're brought up can completely change your views on sex. I really struggled to talk about anything related to it until I needed psychosexual counselling. Then I didn't have much choice, it made me feel a lot more comfortable about understanding sex and my own body. It taught me to able to ask for things sexually from my DH and we're a lot more experiemental now!


----------



## Gunnhilde

sojourn said:


> Thanks folks! I am glad I won't get kicked off for saying a dirty word or something. I get that we're all grown-ups, but it just seem everyone's talking about sex like nervous teenagers. Lots of quotation marks (ie. "trying"), giggles, apologies and tittering.
> Makes sense though, most societies are so weird about sex we are programmed to not talk about it out loud. It's ok. I'm sure I'll get used to people wishing me luck with peeing on a stick and baby dust.

You'll get used to it. I think most of the way that people talk on here is much more open than they would be in real life, especially in terms of talking about semen and cervical mucus. 

I'm ridiculously open about my sex life and always have been, but "sex" is just not a word I use very often anyway (I tend to use the more slang term that begins with f for it when talking to my OH). I do like the :sex: thing though. :haha:


----------



## babymabey

sojourn said:


> Thanks folks! I am glad I won't get kicked off for saying a dirty word or something. I get that we're all grown-ups, but it just seem everyone's talking about sex like nervous teenagers. Lots of quotation marks (ie. "trying"), giggles, apologies and tittering.
> Makes sense though, most societies are so weird about sex we are programmed to not talk about it out loud. It's ok. I'm sure I'll get used to people wishing me luck with peeing on a stick and baby dust.

Five words: "Fifty Shades of Grey" Series. The backlash that that series is getting proves that people cannot stand to talk about sex. Instead of opening themselves up to something new, people who have not read it judge the people who have without knowing what the book is really about.

Don't feel slow for not understanding the "lingo" most of the time I have no idea what it means. One of the first things I figured out was that AF means Aunt Flo I was very proud of myself for figuring that out.:happydance:


----------



## Gunnhilde

babymabey said:


> Five words: "Fifty Shades of Grey" Series. The backlash that that series is getting proves that people cannot stand to talk about sex. Instead of opening themselves up to something new, people who have not read it judge the people who have without knowing what the book is really about.
> 
> Don't feel slow for not understanding the "lingo" most of the time I have no idea what it means. One of the first things I figured out was that AF means Aunt Flo I was very proud of myself for figuring that out.:happydance:

What backlash? It is quite popular around here for reasons I do not understand.

The subject matter is a little bit boring for someone who has been in the sub/dom lifestyle for 14 years, but whatever floats peoples' boats. :shrug:


----------



## LKPone

4magpies said:


> And I'm far from clueless lol!! I wish I was!!
> 
> xxx

Argh, sorry!! I'm such a dork! :dohh: I meant Jojolabobo, sorry! Ha ha! :wacko:

And thanks for the clarification... I knew the part about general anaesthetic etc, but I honestly thought that the 'dye' part was the same procedure essentially as the HSG! :shrug:


----------



## babymabey

Gunnhilde said:


> babymabey said:
> 
> 
> Five words: "Fifty Shades of Grey" Series. The backlash that that series is getting proves that people cannot stand to talk about sex. Instead of opening themselves up to something new, people who have not read it judge the people who have without knowing what the book is really about.
> 
> Don't feel slow for not understanding the "lingo" most of the time I have no idea what it means. One of the first things I figured out was that AF means Aunt Flo I was very proud of myself for figuring that out.:happydance:
> 
> What backlash? It is quite popular around here for reasons I do not understand.
> 
> The subject matter is a little bit boring for someone who has been in the sub/dom lifestyle for 14 years, but whatever floats peoples' boats. :shrug:Click to expand...

I guess not really backlash, just really negative views. I know here in the U.S. there are many groups getting together trying to get it banned from stores and libraries.


----------



## Gunnhilde

babymabey said:


> Gunnhilde said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> babymabey said:
> 
> 
> Five words: "Fifty Shades of Grey" Series. The backlash that that series is getting proves that people cannot stand to talk about sex. Instead of opening themselves up to something new, people who have not read it judge the people who have without knowing what the book is really about.
> 
> Don't feel slow for not understanding the "lingo" most of the time I have no idea what it means. One of the first things I figured out was that AF means Aunt Flo I was very proud of myself for figuring that out.:happydance:
> 
> What backlash? It is quite popular around here for reasons I do not understand.
> 
> The subject matter is a little bit boring for someone who has been in the sub/dom lifestyle for 14 years, but whatever floats peoples' boats. :shrug:Click to expand...
> 
> I guess not really backlash, just really negative views. I know here in the U.S. there are many groups getting together trying to get it banned from stores and libraries.Click to expand...

Actually I'm in CT for the moment and the local bookstore had a cocktail and book party to discuss it. I'm pretty sure I even saw it for sale at the local supermarket by the checkout lanes. :haha:

CT is a pretty liberal state though. :winkwink: Has there been a lot of dislike for it in Utah?


----------



## LKPone

Gunnhilde said:


> babymabey said:
> 
> 
> Five words: "Fifty Shades of Grey" Series. The backlash that that series is getting proves that people cannot stand to talk about sex. Instead of opening themselves up to something new, people who have not read it judge the people who have without knowing what the book is really about.
> 
> Don't feel slow for not understanding the "lingo" most of the time I have no idea what it means. One of the first things I figured out was that AF means Aunt Flo I was very proud of myself for figuring that out.:happydance:
> 
> What backlash? It is quite popular around here for reasons I do not understand.
> 
> The subject matter is a little bit boring for someone who has been in the sub/dom lifestyle for 14 years, but whatever floats peoples' boats. :shrug:Click to expand...

Seriously?? You're only 25! That means you started living that lifestyle when you were 11! :wacko: Or am I being completely blonde? 

I haven't read the books - I've just heard that they aren't particularly well written and badly written books annoy the hell out of me! Here in the UK, they're available in all the supermarkets at reduced prices! But anecdotally, I have a funny story about them... my friend was reading the first book on the train and got to a raunchy part. She glanced over and the lady next to her was reading the bible! :rofl:


----------



## wellsk

I'm from the UK and 50 Shades of Grey has been hugely popular here, and I've never heard about anyone trying to ban it over here. :shrug:
That said, I'm very open sexually, but I couldn't read it. Not because of the sex scenes, more due to the fact it's poorly written...


----------



## babymabey

It is poorly written, it was definitely a nice distraction though, but I am a big reader (I have over 140 books in my collection, the Fifty Shades series are the only "romance" I have) Utah is an extremely conservative state and I hate it. Most things are closed on Sundays, you can't even buy alcohol on Sunday's in many of the cities. Because I don't really care about what others think of what I am reading, I took Fifty Shades with me to every Dr's appointment I had, and when I would notice someone giving me a dirty look for reading it, I would flash them a huge smile :happydance:


----------



## J_Lynn

Gunnhilde said:


> babymabey said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Gunnhilde said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> babymabey said:
> 
> 
> Five words: "Fifty Shades of Grey" Series. The backlash that that series is getting proves that people cannot stand to talk about sex. Instead of opening themselves up to something new, people who have not read it judge the people who have without knowing what the book is really about.
> 
> Don't feel slow for not understanding the "lingo" most of the time I have no idea what it means. One of the first things I figured out was that AF means Aunt Flo I was very proud of myself for figuring that out.:happydance:
> 
> What backlash? It is quite popular around here for reasons I do not understand.
> 
> The subject matter is a little bit boring for someone who has been in the sub/dom lifestyle for 14 years, but whatever floats peoples' boats. :shrug:Click to expand...
> 
> I guess not really backlash, just really negative views. I know here in the U.S. there are many groups getting together trying to get it banned from stores and libraries.Click to expand...
> 
> Actually I'm in CT for the moment and the local bookstore had a cocktail and book party to discuss it. I'm pretty sure I even saw it for sale at the local supermarket by the checkout lanes. :haha:
> 
> CT is a pretty liberal state though. :winkwink: Has there been a lot of dislike for it in Utah?Click to expand...

I read it and the whole book I spent waiting for it to get good .... I guess I am just into some really freaky things because I could have fallen asleep to that book. lol 

Not Quite A Lady by Erica Anderson is pretty decent; I downloaded it off GoogleBooks on my phone and read it at the YMCA while I was working out one day LOL It is historical, but quite steamy :D I think I burned more calories on the eliptical that day :) lol


----------



## Gunnhilde

LKPone said:


> Seriously?? You're only 25! That means you started living that lifestyle when you were 11! :wacko: Or am I being completely blonde?

Yeppers. I'm a little ashamed of it, but I was kind of an early bloomer. :blush: I should revise it to 13 years, because I haven't really been doing it the last year or so. :flower:


----------



## Storked

Utah is very, very conservative lol.


----------



## sojourn

wellsk said:


> You've hit the nail on the head there Sojourn. In many cultures it's not acceptable to talk about sex with other people, even sometimes with your OH. Sometimes even just how you're brought up can completely change your views on sex. I really struggled to talk about anything related to it until I needed psychosexual counselling. Then I didn't have much choice, it made me feel a lot more comfortable about understanding sex and my own body. It taught me to able to ask for things sexually from my DH and we're a lot more experiemental now!


That's great! I grew up in the strangest most conservative household. However, my mom got knocked up twice in high school! My dad doesn't really talk about sex, but my mom (technically my step-mom) didn't want me to repeat my bio-mom's mistakes. They were always like "Sex is great and fun and lovely and you should do lots and lots of it when you are a grown up". Even as little kids we used proper names for anatomy. I started having sex and my friend group was all really open and natural about it. I was definitely lucky. I think not having seen it be something shameful (despite a conservative religious family) helped a lot. Even as a nanny, I was always into not body shaming or making things scary. When my 12.5 y/o charge got caught masturbating his mom was at a loss. I was like "Just be like, do what you want dude, but do it in private and don't waste the water". When talking to the younger siblings about the appropriateness of clothes in public we were like these parts of you are for your personal use. You can be as naked as you want in your room, but out of respect for other people's comfort and to keep ourselves safe, we wear clothes outside of our rooms. NBD. I think all of the body/sex/slut shaming that our society does is totally unhealthy and awful! It's part of what makes kids experiment in unhealthy ways and not feel comfortable talking or getting guidance. I feel like (through research) this is a problem that stems to under-reporting of various kinds of abuse and risky behaviors ESPECIALLY in early-blooming girls.

/crazy schpiel

I have found people on this site to be super open (yay!) but still use weird terms instead of scientific terms.Like, I haven't seen anyone say sperm. I see "swimmers". Maybe it just gets to you after a while and you don't want to feel clinical. 


Good on you taking steps to change! Isn't sex so much more health and happy and wonderful when you can just be honest! Yay!

PS: to the person who said they usually use the F word found in the vernacular as a synonym for sex...ME TOO! hahahaha lots of times. Especially when I'm being silly. But for scientific research purposes I use plain 'ol sex.


----------



## Fizzyfefe

sojourn said:


> I have found people on this site to be super open (yay!) but still use weird terms instead of scientific terms.Like, I haven't seen anyone say sperm. I see "swimmers". Maybe it just gets to you after a while and you don't want to feel clinical.

The only abbreviations I use are BBT and occasionally CM instead of cervical mucus, because it takes too long to type. Other than that, I use proper terms like menstruation/menses or intercourse. But I think that may have to do with a medical background. Glad to see someone else who doesn't like the abbreviations. :)


----------



## Feisty Fidget

I am personally not reading 50 shades as I have been rather put off by all the older work colleagues that are 'enjoying' it - that and the fact it is going to be somewhat tame compared to my usual.

The double standard thing annoys the hell out of me. At the moment it is considered in the UK as Mummy Porn and apparently that is fine and dandy. If a bloke was reading something similar, it would be a disgrace etc - there is no way they would cutely name it 'Daddy Porn' as it would be seen as wholly inappropriate :wacko:

If I want porn, I will log onto the net. If I want a literary escape, I will go find something that intrigues me - not just because it is the latest 'thing'


----------



## rosestar2012

Feel like screaming and crying. Walking to work with terrible pmt which is enough to upset me anyway when I see a girl with a massive bump. I even managed to think isn't that nice and then saw she was happily smoking away. I felt so angry and still do. I know it's nothing to do with me but what a selfish selfish cow. All I want is to be pregnant and healthy and it just seems so unfair and now I'm being pathetic and self pitying waiting for stupid AF to show up.


----------



## 4magpies

FF I got annoyed about the mummy porn comment. Erm hello? 

Nice to see you about doll. I stop lurk your journal as I do most people's. Thinking if you. Seems we are both running in place as usual. 

xxx


----------



## Feisty Fidget

Right back at you Becca, I am a silent stalker too ;)

Rose that really sucks :hugs: PMT always magnifies things anyway, but the fact that she was smoking would have had me in tears!


----------



## laurac1988

Wish DP would make up her mind


----------



## J_Lynn

I was having a horrible day today; like a HORRIBLE day - and earlier my husband was putting on baby powder (he works in a very hot place, and needs it for chaffing around his balls lol) and I was like "that smells horrible - I hate baby powder ... ick!" he just smiled and said, "you should get used to it - you're going to need it soon!" and he is just always so positive about us having a baby, and just always manages to lift my spirits. Even though I'm having so many stupid problems and my body doesn't seem to want to cooperate for sh*t, little things like that just make my day. So I guess this wasn't a bad vent - but a good one :) I had to tell someone, and no one else would understand lol


----------



## HWPG

Dear Universe, since you blessed my friend with fertility, would you please send a healthy baby along after nine months of serious all day morning sickness, many stretch marks, and hormone induced acne? thank you!


----------



## pinksprinkles

Well, I thought I would O by now, but no such luck. Trying to keep my head up, but having a really down day. Had all he leading-up-to-O symptoms, and then nothing happened. OPK's aren't getting any darker. :cry: Looks like I may have to go back in for another round of Provera. I still can't believe that taking a supplement did this. I only took the FertilAid from February until May. It's been 2.5 months since I quit it and still no O.

Next Wednesday marks 6 months since the last time I ovulated. I am so angry at the people who make FertilAid I could scream. They know this is happening to women who use their supplement, but they put absolutely NO warning on their pills. In fact, they even make a point to tell you that if you see cycle problems that you should keep taking the product as the cycle disruptions are just your body sorting itself out. What a bunch of BS!

I've gotten all the testing done my midwife can do, and she still has absolutely no idea what the pills did to me. All hormone levels are normal, I just don't ovulate. I haven't ovulated even once since taking FertilAid, and the only periods I have had are Provera-induced ones. 

It's a good thing that the FetilAid people don't live near me, because the amount of rage I am currently feeling might cause them serious damage. I can't believe this is happening to me.


----------



## Gunnhilde

pinksprinkles said:


> Well, I thought I would O by now, but no such luck. Trying to keep my head up, but having a really down day. Had all he leading-up-to-O symptoms, and then nothing happened. OPK's aren't getting any darker. :cry: Looks like I may have to go back in for another round of Provera. I still can't believe that taking a supplement did this. I only took the FertilAid from February until May. It's been 2.5 months since I quit it and still no O.
> 
> Next Wednesday marks 6 months since the last time I ovulated. I am so angry at the people who make FertilAid I could scream. They know this is happening to women who use their supplement, but they put absolutely NO warning on their pills. In fact, they even make a point to tell you that if you see cycle problems that you should keep taking the product as the cycle disruptions are just your body sorting itself out. What a bunch of BS!
> 
> I've gotten all the testing done my midwife can do, and she still has absolutely no idea what the pills did to me. All hormone levels are normal, I just don't ovulate. I haven't ovulated even once since taking FertilAid, and the only periods I have had are Provera-induced ones.
> 
> It's a good thing that the FetilAid people don't live near me, because the amount of rage I am currently feeling might cause them serious damage. I can't believe this is happening to me.

This might be a little far fetched, but have you considered suing them?

I'd be really pissed off too!


----------



## pinksprinkles

I wish I could sue!! The problem is to sue you actually have to have proof that the product is what did it. Since midwife says everything is "normal", there is no way to "prove" that their product caused it. She says it's obvious that it's the FertilAid that did it and there is no doubt in her mind, but there is absolutey nothing "proof-wise" that she could supply to a court. ffs- I am so angry!


----------



## Torsornin

sometimes I think I cant get preggo cause other people are over exercising their fertility rights
like there is a baby store and they are all sold out


----------



## Fizzyfefe

My new dog just tore apart my freaking house. I only left her alone for 30 minutes! UGH.


----------



## babymabey

pinksprinkles said:


> Well, I thought I would O by now, but no such luck. Trying to keep my head up, but having a really down day. Had all he leading-up-to-O symptoms, and then nothing happened. OPK's aren't getting any darker. :cry: Looks like I may have to go back in for another round of Provera. I still can't believe that taking a supplement did this. I only took the FertilAid from February until May. It's been 2.5 months since I quit it and still no O.
> 
> Next Wednesday marks 6 months since the last time I ovulated. I am so angry at the people who make FertilAid I could scream. They know this is happening to women who use their supplement, but they put absolutely NO warning on their pills. In fact, they even make a point to tell you that if you see cycle problems that you should keep taking the product as the cycle disruptions are just your body sorting itself out. What a bunch of BS!
> 
> I've gotten all the testing done my midwife can do, and she still has absolutely no idea what the pills did to me. All hormone levels are normal, I just don't ovulate. I haven't ovulated even once since taking FertilAid, and the only periods I have had are Provera-induced ones.
> 
> It's a good thing that the FetilAid people don't live near me, because the amount of rage I am currently feeling might cause them serious damage. I can't believe this is happening to me.

Has your Doc considered putting you on Metformin or Clomid?


----------



## J_Lynn

pinksprinkles said:


> I wish I could sue!! The problem is to sue you actually have to have proof that the product is what did it. Since midwife says everything is "normal", there is no way to "prove" that their product caused it. She says it's obvious that it's the FertilAid that did it and there is no doubt in her mind, but there is absolutey nothing "proof-wise" that she could supply to a court. ffs- I am so angry!

Omg.... I took that stuff for a month, then switched to Vitex because it was cheaper. That's so crazy that it did.that to you!!!!!!!!!! That's horrible!!!!!


----------



## pinksprinkles

babymabey- At first they were saying Clomid might be a good choice, but now they are saying that since I originally was more or less regular (at least regular enough) before, they don't want to possibly mess my body up further by introducing another drug into my system. I think that if I haven't gotten O back within a couple of Provera-induced cycles they may start me on Clomid, but for now, it's more of a wait-and-see type situation. Since I've already reacted badly to one thing, they want my system to have a chance to normalize before trying anything else. I'm just having a hard time being patient at this point.


----------



## pinksprinkles

J_Lynn- Apparently it's not even that uncommon! *smh* You see all the good reviews on their website, but if you dig a little deeper, look at the Amazon 1 and 2-star reviews, etc, all of a sudden you realize how many women this has happened to. I am very glad it didn't mess up your cycles! It does seem to help lots and lots of women, but if I had know the risk I was taking by trying it, I don't think it's something I would have gone for. With reviews like these, there should be some kind of warning:

https://www.amazon.com/FertilAid-Wo...?ie=UTF8&filterBy=addOneStar&showViewpoints=0


----------



## tamithomas

oh my goodness! Every woman that it has messed up their cycle should do a class action law suit against them all together!!!!!! I feel so bad for those women and the ones in this thread that it has affected. My major sympathies, you must feel violated :(


----------



## dizzy65

i am getting pretty fed up with the lady posting every 10 min onto her profile on fb that she just wishes baby to come ect.. honey your only 39 weeks its not even your due date (she has been complaining since she was 35 weeks pregnant!)


----------



## pinksprinkles

tamithomas said:


> oh my goodness! Every woman that it has messed up their cycle should do a class action law suit against them all together!!!!!! I feel so bad for those women and the ones in this thread that it has affected. My major sympathies, you must feel violated :(

:hugs: Thanks tami. I really appreciate that. If there was a way to scientifically "prove" that the FertilAid is what did it, I would be suing them right now. Sadly, because my midwife and OB can't actually figure out what the FertilAid did me to cause this, they can't give me any medical support in suing. :wacko: And since I had no problems before taking the FertilAid, I never went in for any pre-FertilAid testing, so I have no past hormone panels to compare my current levels to. (Just because results are currently within the "normal _range_" doesn't mean they are normal for me, but there's no telling what my levels used to be like.)

This seems to be the same case for the many women I've talked to about this who also stopped O'ing. All tests come back normal, but our bodies refuse to O- and no doctor can explain it! If we could figure out how to successfully sue them, we definitely would! I will keep looking into it, but at this point it seems like they may be able to keep peddling their atrocious product.


----------



## jcombs35

dizzy65 said:


> i am getting pretty fed up with the lady posting every 10 min onto her profile on fb that she just wishes baby to come ect.. honey your only 39 weeks its not even your due date (she has been complaining since she was 35 weeks pregnant!)

My step sister in law did this for 3 months! It's all she talked about, and she finally whined around until she got her way at 39 weeks.:growlmad:


----------



## pinksprinkles

jcombs35 said:


> dizzy65 said:
> 
> 
> i am getting pretty fed up with the lady posting every 10 min onto her profile on fb that she just wishes baby to come ect.. honey your only 39 weeks its not even your due date (she has been complaining since she was 35 weeks pregnant!)
> 
> My step sister in law did this for 3 months! It's all she talked about, and she finally whined around until she got her way at 39 weeks.:growlmad:Click to expand...

I seriously don't get why some people just can't figure it out: A baby should not be born until it is ready to be born- ie. when labor starts naturally, unless there is a real medical emergency (and I don't mean baby is getting "too big", I mean like car accident or severe growth restriction). If someone goes and get themself induced simply because they "don't want to be pregnant any more", they're putting their own *wants* ahead of their child's *needs*. What a crappy way to start the role of being a mother. As a childbirth educator, this crap pisses me off so friggin much!!! Baby is still in there for a reason! (Thank god we don't lay eggs, because if you try to open one up instead of letting the chick hatch NATURALLY and in its own time, the chick dies.)


----------



## jcombs35

pinksprinkles said:


> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> dizzy65 said:
> 
> 
> i am getting pretty fed up with the lady posting every 10 min onto her profile on fb that she just wishes baby to come ect.. honey your only 39 weeks its not even your due date (she has been complaining since she was 35 weeks pregnant!)
> 
> My step sister in law did this for 3 months! It's all she talked about, and she finally whined around until she got her way at 39 weeks.:growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> I seriously don't get why some people just can't figure it out: A baby should not be born until it is ready to be born- ie. when labor starts naturally, unless there is a real medical emergency (and I don't mean baby is getting "too big", I mean like car accident or severe growth restriction). If someone goes and get themself induced simply because they "don't want to be pregnant any more", they're putting their own *wants* ahead of their child's *needs*. What a crappy way to start the role of being a mother. As a childbirth educator, this crap pisses me off so friggin much!!! Baby is still in there for a reason! (Thank god we don't lay eggs, because if you try to open one up instead of letting the chick hatch NATURALLY and in its own time, the chick dies.)Click to expand...

Exactly! When I was pregnant with my oldest one, they did have to induce me at 38 weeks because I had pre-eclampsia, and one day I got the worst headache, so when I finally decided to call my doctor, she told me to get to the er immediately. My blood pressure was through the roof, and me and baby were both in danger at that point. I can say inducing is actually a lot more painful than going into labor naturally, and my son was born with a few problems because he was early. His liver wasn't developed all the way, and he had jaundice. Even at 38 weeks, there's a chance something could be wrong, so it is best to keep them in there until 40 weeks.

With my SIL, it was a matter of her being uncomfortable. At first, she ate up the attention she got from being pregnant, but then after the excitement died down, she began to moan and complain about wanting "that thing out of her." And when I shared with her that I was having trouble conceiving, she said, "I wish I did!" :growlmad:

But as I said, she did end up getting her way a week early. Now, she's complaining about how hard it is....I really want to choke her.


----------



## pinksprinkles

I think that would drive me batty. At least w/my induction-crazy clients I don't have to deal with the post-birth complaining. And that bit about wishing for conception troubles! Oooo... Knowing me, I would have said something pretty snarky at that point. Bravo to you for putting up with her with grace!


----------



## CaliDreaming

jcombs35 said:


> With my SIL, it was a matter of her being uncomfortable. At first, she ate up the attention she got from being pregnant, but then after the excitement died down, she began to moan and complain about wanting "that thing out of her." *And when I shared with her that I was having trouble conceiving, she said, "I wish I did!" *
> But as I said, she did end up getting her way a week early. Now, she's complaining about how hard it is....I really want to choke her.

Then she should get her damn tubes tied then and shut up. Geez!


----------



## Fizzyfefe

jcombs35 said:


> pinksprinkles said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> jcombs35 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> dizzy65 said:
> 
> 
> i am getting pretty fed up with the lady posting every 10 min onto her profile on fb that she just wishes baby to come ect.. honey your only 39 weeks its not even your due date (she has been complaining since she was 35 weeks pregnant!)
> 
> My step sister in law did this for 3 months! It's all she talked about, and she finally whined around until she got her way at 39 weeks.:growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> I seriously don't get why some people just can't figure it out: A baby should not be born until it is ready to be born- ie. when labor starts naturally, unless there is a real medical emergency (and I don't mean baby is getting "too big", I mean like car accident or severe growth restriction). If someone goes and get themself induced simply because they "don't want to be pregnant any more", they're putting their own *wants* ahead of their child's *needs*. What a crappy way to start the role of being a mother. As a childbirth educator, this crap pisses me off so friggin much!!! Baby is still in there for a reason! (Thank god we don't lay eggs, because if you try to open one up instead of letting the chick hatch NATURALLY and in its own time, the chick dies.)Click to expand...
> 
> Exactly! When I was pregnant with my oldest one, they did have to induce me at 38 weeks because I had pre-eclampsia, and one day I got the worst headache, so when I finally decided to call my doctor, she told me to get to the er immediately. My blood pressure was through the roof, and me and baby were both in danger at that point. I can say inducing is actually a lot more painful than going into labor naturally, and my son was born with a few problems because he was early. His liver wasn't developed all the way, and he had jaundice. Even at 38 weeks, there's a chance something could be wrong, so it is best to keep them in there until 40 weeks.
> 
> With my SIL, it was a matter of her being uncomfortable. At first, she ate up the attention she got from being pregnant, but then after the excitement died down, she began to moan and complain about wanting "that thing out of her." And when I shared with her that I was having trouble conceiving, she said, "I wish I did!" :growlmad:
> 
> But as I said, she did end up getting her way a week early. Now, she's complaining about how hard it is....I really want to choke her.Click to expand...

It drives me insane, too, ladies! The nurse that I followed when doing clinicals told a lady this, and I've always remembered it:

"Pregnancy is like cooking a meal in a crock-pot, not a microwave oven!"

Made me smile. :)


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## ChartsNHearts

I hope you don't mind me joining you in your ranting ladies!

I also post on another TTC website and someone's post over there has really got me cross today. I don't know why someone would claim that they had experienced/were experiencing chemical pregnancies, when they appear to be saying these things just to seek attention. On the one hand I feel awful doubting her if it's true, but you know when things just don't add up? It makes me angry on behalf of the ladies who do genuinely have experience of chemical pregnancies/miscarriages.

Hmm. Very strange behaviour! The mind boggles!


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## Rudolf168

I rant is nothing major. I'm just wishing O would get here already. Last week I thought it was coming so we DTD...but then CM disappeared and temps confirmed it didn't arrive. Now this week CM is showing up again and I've DTD with hubby last night and the night before. I just hope that O shows up today or tomorrow. Taking Soy for 1 cycle really messed me up apparently...now it takes a good 30+ days for me to O. UGH!!


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## babymabey

Rudolf168 said:


> I rant is nothing major. I'm just wishing O would get here already. Last week I thought it was coming so we DTD...but then CM disappeared and temps confirmed it didn't arrive. Now this week CM is showing up again and I've DTD with hubby last night and the night before. I just hope that O shows up today or tomorrow. Taking Soy for 1 cycle really messed me up apparently...now it takes a good 30+ days for me to O. UGH!!

Hello there fellow Utahn :wave:. This happened to me last month, I ended up actually ovulating during the second round of CM. All I can say is I am happy that there are the ovulation tests:happydance: because I hate guessing when I ovulate, and I am not good with temp charting.:blush:


----------



## jcombs35

ChartsNHearts said:


> I hope you don't mind me joining you in your ranting ladies!
> 
> I also post on another TTC website and someone's post over there has really got me cross today. I don't know why someone would claim that they had experienced/were experiencing chemical pregnancies, when they appear to be saying these things just to seek attention. On the one hand I feel awful doubting her if it's true, but you know when things just don't add up? It makes me angry on behalf of the ladies who do genuinely have experience of chemical pregnancies/miscarriages.
> 
> Hmm. Very strange behaviour! The mind boggles!

Hmmm.. you're not talking about me are you? I've had nothing but trouble with this last cycle. I think I o'd early, then I had weird spotting, and I had several positive tests, but then a negative doctor's test, and I was sent home to freak out until I miss another AF. (Due tomorrow.) The other night I took a digi to ease my mind, and accidentally set it down in a puddle of water on my sink, and when I went to check it, there was water just dripping off of it, and it said, "not pregnant." And so I took a regular test strip, which had a faint line, but when I posted it, everyone kept saying I probably had a chemical and that's what the spotting was...:growlmad: (Since they're all doctors...)

So for the time being, until I find out what in the world is going on, I have been bouncing back and forth from ttc to pregnancy forums, searching for someone that may have had this before and what on earth it is.

I certainly don't mean to offend any of you, and I'm not trying to rub my positives in your faces. I'm confused, and not sure they're accurate, or if I really have had a chemical, or what!!:wacko:


----------



## Sass827

So DH and I have been TTC for the last few months and had no success. I've changed my lifestyle - aka stopped drinking and been avoiding parties where everyone is drinking. My BIL and SIL are coming to town for the weekend with their DS who they conceived "on the first try, Of Course!" (bleh!) and I'm freaking out because I don't want them to pick up on my lack of drinking and realize that we are trying. I don't know how long our TTC is going to last and I just don't want them in on it. I also don't want to seem jealous of their baby. Any tips or tricks? All advice is welcome. BTW- I never really liked my BIL or SIL. They have a weird vibe about them and can occasionally be jerks.


----------



## Gunnhilde

Sass827 said:


> So DH and I have been TTC for the last few months and had no success. I've changed my lifestyle - aka stopped drinking and been avoiding parties where everyone is drinking. My BIL and SIL are coming to town for the weekend with their DS who they conceived "on the first try, Of Course!" (bleh!) and I'm freaking out because I don't want them to pick up on my lack of drinking and realize that we are trying. I don't know how long our TTC is going to last and I just don't want them in on it. I also don't want to seem jealous of their baby. Any tips or tricks? All advice is welcome. BTW- I never really liked my BIL or SIL. They have a weird vibe about them and can occasionally be jerks.

You'd all be drinking with DS around normally?? I'd just say that you guys would prefer to stay sober because there is a kiddo around. :winkwink:


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## sojourn

This might be a little nuts. 

I just came off of depo and I am not ovulating and I am not pregnant. I am going through, what I assume is, withdrawal bleeding. This is all fine with me. I am feeling impatient, but I get that nature will take its course. 

When we decided to stop birth control and to pursue conception, I quit drinking, smoking (I only smoke socially anyway) and even cut down my coffee consumption from a pot a day to a cup. 

Good plan, right?

I was feeling all angsty and guilty because it's our close friend's birthday. Angsty because I was like "Whatever, I am definitely not pregnant and definitely not ovulation. I will 100% change my whole life when there is an egg that can be a fetus that can be a kid." I was (am?) feeling guilty because I was like "But how can you ever by the blessed earth mother being if you care about going to have drinks with your friends, but not your not even released egg that can't even possibly get fertilized and thus not even possibly turn into a fetus and thus not even possibly be a baby".

I think, for my mental health. I need to relax and not feel guilty about wanting to go out with friends and have a couple of drinks. It's not like I am going to go get hammered, it's not even like I will do it often. Once I actually get the hint that I might eventually ovulate I will actually stop everything completely. Until then, I think it is a little unreasonable to focus my whole brain and lifestyle around something that is impossible. 

Now, bring on the comments about how selfish and awful I am.


----------



## Sass827

Gunn- Yeah - my in-laws are a pretty heavy drinking family. When everyone gets together, it's usually a beer drinking all day type of thing. SIL is a lighter drinker. In the past, my drinking around the in-laws has varied. I have major issues with my MIL, so I have drank moderately around her in the past. The baby is only 10 months old, and I think the general consensus is that it's my SIL's job to take care of him. Any advice? please?


----------



## Sass827

Sojourn- I'm a fan of your plan. Everyone says the best way to conceive is to be happy and relaxed, so why not enjoy a drink or two when you know your not pregnant? No judging here! :0)


----------



## dizzy65

My Vent for the day hehe :)

i am so sick and tired of people announcing im pregnant.. i think the next person that gets to announce should be me :) i so badly want my bfp!


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## J_Lynn

sojourn - I have no judgment of you, either. I love my moscato and don't plan on giving it up until I read a BFP. I am a light drinker anyway, but if I go out and I want a beer or a glass (or two) of wine, I am going to drink it and I am not going to feel guilty. Drink away, my dear - drink away! :)


----------



## J_Lynn

pinksprinkles said:


> J_Lynn- Apparently it's not even that uncommon! *smh* You see all the good reviews on their website, but if you dig a little deeper, look at the Amazon 1 and 2-star reviews, etc, all of a sudden you realize how many women this has happened to. I am very glad it didn't mess up your cycles! It does seem to help lots and lots of women, but if I had know the risk I was taking by trying it, I don't think it's something I would have gone for. With reviews like these, there should be some kind of warning:
> 
> https://www.amazon.com/FertilAid-Wo...?ie=UTF8&filterBy=addOneStar&showViewpoints=0

If it did mess up my cycles, I wouldn't know .... sadly ... because of the blocked tube issue and the PCOS, my cycle and Oing are all jacked up anyway. 

I really, really hope that something can help you - because it's one thing to naturally have O/cycle issues, but it's really absolutely unacceptable for a product to cause those issues when they claim they will HELP!! I'm so sorry you have to deal with that :hugs:


----------



## cntrygrl

So thankful that I saw this thread.... :hugs:
I told a friend that DH and I were TTC. She had only been with her boyfriend for a couple of months. Next thing I know she is now pregnant with twins! Seriously!!!


----------



## Fizzyfefe

Beginning to think getting a dog was a mistake... She was good for the first two days, but now she is becoming a terror. She tore up the apartment yesterday when we left her alone. Just now, I took her outside to go to the bathroom, and two people stopped to talk to me. She got really aggressive and started growling. Mind you, I have barely ANY human contact, and I was really excited that these guys actually wanted to talk to me. But noooo, the dog freaking acted like they were the spawn of Satan! They weren't doing ANYTHING to freak her out. One guy asked if she was going to hurt them, and I responded "Probably not, but we just got her from the pound on Sunday so we're still learning about her," and his response was, "Oh, never mind..." And then they walked away. 

I needed a companion, but she is NOTHING like how she was when we first got her. She was so sweet and lovable and now she is the complete opposite. I don't want to give up on her, but I can't have a dog that is anti-social and growls at everything and can't be left alone. I'm so upset about this. :(


----------



## sojourn

Thank you so much! I have no idea why it is affirming to have other people tell me that I am not being unreasonable. 
It's not like I'm going to be doing jaeger luges or anything. I'll have a few cocktails, dance around, shoot a few games of pool and just freaking relax! I am super stoked to start a family, but I am just trying to enjoy this bit of time that I have to have my life as I know it. It won't be like this forever!


----------



## MRSD6811

Thing I wish I could do but can't...Press pause on the whole world except my DH and I til I can hold my head up high and not dread the dreaded questions!


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## sojourn

Fizzyfefe said:


> Beginning to think getting a dog was a mistake... She was good for the first two days, but now she is becoming a terror. She tore up the apartment yesterday when we left her alone. Just now, I took her outside to go to the bathroom, and two people stopped to talk to me. She got really aggressive and started growling. Mind you, I have barely ANY human contact, and I was really excited that these guys actually wanted to talk to me. But noooo, the dog freaking acted like they were the spawn of Satan! They weren't doing ANYTHING to freak her out. One guy asked if she was going to hurt them, and I responded "Probably not, but we just got her from the pound on Sunday so we're still learning about her," and his response was, "Oh, never mind..." And then they walked away.
> 
> I needed a companion, but she is NOTHING like how she was when we first got her. She was so sweet and lovable and now she is the completely opposite. I don't want to give up on her, but I can't have a dog that is anti-social and growls at everything and can't be left alone. I'm so upset about this. :(


That is so hard. I am not really an animal person, so I know people will disagree with me, but I don't know that it is a good idea to keep the dog. 

Exhibiting aggressive behavior is kind of scary. Also, animals are somewhat unpredictable. You say you have little social contact, but wouldn't you feel awful if the dog got out and bit someone? 

I didn't look closely at your information, but if you are trying to conceive (assumed based on the fact that you are posting here), what happens when you do get pregnant and have a small child around? I know that under the best of circumstances, that is a ways off (nine months at least!), but it's something to consider. 

You did take the dog on, you are responsible for it and its actions. Some people may take this to mean that you are obligated to keep it. I think it means you are obligated to think long and hard about what behavior you feel comfortable being responsible for.


----------



## wellsk

Fizzyfefe, what about getting a behavioural expert to have a look at your dogs behaviour. We have a dog (although he's not naughty anymore as he's serious ill :cry: ) who used to steal things, and get aggressive around them. He's destroyed alsorts, thousands of pounds worth of stuff! But we love him dearly. So we hired an expert who gave us some really great tips on how to manage his behaviour, and although he's not perfect, he's so much better! 
That's the problem with taking on a dog from a rehoming centre, is that you never fully understand what happened to them previously. Your dog has also not been in your home very long, so it's a bit mean for you to expect so much already.


----------



## CaliDreaming

OMG. My co worker just asked me in front of everyone if I was pregnant!!! I feel so humiliated. :( She tried to justify it because she found out another coworker had shingles and that it could be harmful to pregnant women. Yeah right!! 

I have gained 15 pounds in the past three months because I found out I was likely anemic and that could have been the cause of me not me not getting pregnant. So I slacked on my diet and exercise.

I'm already feeling uncomfortable because my clothes don't fit. My hair looks like crap because it had started breaking off from my nutritional deficiencies. It's bad enough not getting pregnant without people pointing out that I look pregnant. And now I find out that even though I haven't told a soul that I am TTC, everybody is thinking that that is what I'm doing. 

I just want to crawl under a rock and die....


----------



## Sass827

Fizzy- If your dog has only been home for 2 days from the pound, I bet she is just having a hard time adjusting. Going from the pound to a home is very scary and being left alone probably made her super freaked. I was never a fan of this before we rescued our pound puppy, but I'll tell you having a kennel in the living room saved our pooch from going back to the pound. She loves her kennel. It's her little place to go and relax and feel secure. She goes there on her own now, even when we are home because it's her den. we fill it with blankets, toys and treats. I would highly recommend getting one.


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## Sass827

I'm so sorry Cali. Same happened to me two years ago. I just cried and cried. People are such jerks.


----------



## wellsk

Hugs Cali, how rude of your co worker! :hugs:
Hopefully you'll start to feel better soon and then the rest will follow!


Little vent;
I'm starting to feel a little physically sick when I see lots of undeserving girls on bragbook holding their newborn little ones and all their 'congratulations'. I've had 6 birth announcements in just over a month, all but one who are far younger than me, living with their parents. And in no fit state to be parents themselves, so angry, jealous and bitter. I just want to hold my own little one and not have to feel this way anymore.


----------



## Gunnhilde

wellsk said:


> Hugs Cali, how rude of your co worker! :hugs:
> Hopefully you'll start to feel better soon and then the rest will follow!
> 
> 
> Little vent;
> I'm starting to feel a little physically sick when I see lots of undeserving girls on bragbook holding their newborn little ones and all their 'congratulations'. I've had 6 birth announcements in just over a month, all but one who are far younger than me, living with their parents. And in no fit state to be parents themselves, so angry, jealous and bitter. I just want to hold my own little one and not have to feel this way anymore.

Me thinks that you need that Chrome add-on. I replaced the pictures with things tagged YOLO. :haha:


----------



## wellsk

Gunnhilde said:


> wellsk said:
> 
> 
> Hugs Cali, how rude of your co worker! :hugs:
> Hopefully you'll start to feel better soon and then the rest will follow!
> 
> 
> Little vent;
> I'm starting to feel a little physically sick when I see lots of undeserving girls on bragbook holding their newborn little ones and all their 'congratulations'. I've had 6 birth announcements in just over a month, all but one who are far younger than me, living with their parents. And in no fit state to be parents themselves, so angry, jealous and bitter. I just want to hold my own little one and not have to feel this way anymore.
> 
> Me thinks that you need that Chrome add-on. I replaced the pictures with things tagged YOLO. :haha:Click to expand...

Oh Gunnhilde :rofl: that's hilarious!
I'm thinking maybe penguins or men with moustaches! :haha:


----------



## dollface85

Deleted


----------



## Fizzyfefe

sojourn said:


> That is so hard. I am not really an animal person, so I know people will disagree with me, but I don't know that it is a good idea to keep the dog.
> 
> Exhibiting aggressive behavior is kind of scary. Also, animals are somewhat unpredictable. You say you have little social contact, but wouldn't you feel awful if the dog got out and bit someone?
> 
> I didn't look closely at your information, but if you are trying to conceive (assumed based on the fact that you are posting here), what happens when you do get pregnant and have a small child around? I know that under the best of circumstances, that is a ways off (nine months at least!), but it's something to consider.
> 
> You did take the dog on, you are responsible for it and its actions. Some people may take this to mean that you are obligated to keep it. I think it means you are obligated to think long and hard about what behavior you feel comfortable being responsible for.

Sojourn, I definitely would feel horrible if she hurt someone else. I honestly feel like she just needs to be trained, but I am so ignorant when it comes to animals, as I have never had to do this before. I honestly think she should be muzzled now when I take her outside. We are trying to figure out what triggers her aggressiveness, and so far we noticed that she only growls or barks when I am alone with her, when there is another animal, and when men are around. She never growls at children. Also, we took her to PetSmart, and she was surrounded by other people and animals and didn't bark once, BUT my husband was there. So I'm assuming this means she is trying to be protective of me only...? Don't know this for sure. But the thing is that I don't need protection, you know? I want her to know I am the dominant one. I would feel terrible just giving up and taking her back. I know that it's my responsibility to train her and take care of her. I don't want to get rid of her because she is such a lovebug when we are alone. :(

Thank you for your advice!


----------



## Fizzyfefe

wellsk said:


> Fizzyfefe, what about getting a behavioural expert to have a look at your dogs behaviour. We have a dog (although he's not naughty anymore as he's serious ill :cry: ) who used to steal things, and get aggressive around them. He's destroyed alsorts, thousands of pounds worth of stuff! But we love him dearly. So we hired an expert who gave us some really great tips on how to manage his behaviour, and although he's not perfect, he's so much better!
> That's the problem with taking on a dog from a rehoming centre, is that you never fully understand what happened to them previously. Your dog has also not been in your home very long, so it's a bit mean for you to expect so much already.

Wellsk, I'm so sorry about your sick dog. :flower:

She is registered for training classes; they start on the 22nd. I do not expect perfection from her. When I took her to the vet the other day, the vet said she had a puppy's personality in a dog's body. So I know she's never been trained and needs lots of TLC. However, she was COMPLETELY different when I first got her. She didn't have any bad behavior at the center. We took her to PetSmart and not once did she growl or bark at other people or dogs. She was totally fine on Monday. But now she's 100% different.

I know she needs time and love and patience. I was just super frustrated, especially because I don't have friends here and I finally had an opportunity to meet new people (but that was taken away). So I hope you can understand that I am not expecting her to be perfect and I do know that she needs time to adjust. I was just venting.


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## Fizzyfefe

Sass827 said:


> Fizzy- If your dog has only been home for 2 days from the pound, I bet she is just having a hard time adjusting. Going from the pound to a home is very scary and being left alone probably made her super freaked. I was never a fan of this before we rescued our pound puppy, but I'll tell you having a kennel in the living room saved our pooch from going back to the pound. She loves her kennel. It's her little place to go and relax and feel secure. She goes there on her own now, even when we are home because it's her den. we fill it with blankets, toys and treats. I would highly recommend getting one.

Sass, yes, I do believe that's what is happening. The "honeymoon" period is now over, and I'm learning more about her personality. As soon as we got home yesterday and found the apartment destroyed, hubby went and bought a crate. So we are now trying to have her get used to it. I've put toys and treats in there for her to munch on, so she hopefully doesn't associate the crate with negativity.

The thing is that I've never had to crate train a dog. I've never been around an aggressive dog. My pets as a child were always calm and affectionate and never barked. I want to love and care for her and train her. It's just super frustrating. :(

Thank you for your advice!


----------



## wellsk

Yeah, my dog was exactly the same too! The first week he was good as gold, then he became an absolute terror. He destroyed our brand new carpets, mobile phone, printer cartridges, do much stuff! We've had exactly the same words as you 'he's a puppy in a dogs body'
But now he's got epilepsy, and I think the seizure has caused brain damage, and now he can't walk and it's like there's nothing behind his eyes. It's been devastating. 

I hope your dog gets better soon behaviour wise, I can completely understand your frustration though. :hugs:


----------



## Fizzyfefe

wellsk said:


> Yeah, my dog was exactly the same too! The first week he was good as gold, then he became an absolute terror. He destroyed our brand new carpets, mobile phone, printer cartridges, do much stuff! We've had exactly the same words as you 'he's a puppy in a dogs body'
> But now he's got epilepsy, and I think the seizure has caused brain damage, and now he can't walk and it's like there's nothing behind his eyes. It's been devastating.
> 
> I hope your dog gets better soon behaviour wise, I can completely understand your frustration though. :hugs:

Oh my gosh! That's terrible- both destroying stuff and being sick. She only has ruined our shutters and blinds. She started chewing the carpet but I stopped that behavior immediately.

My dad has seizures, so I completely understand your pain. Is there nothing you can medically do for him? Did you get him from the pound?

Thank you for your support. I don't want to give up on her. And I'm sorry again about your dog. :(


----------



## wellsk

That's okay. Ironically my DH has epilepsy too, so I'm totally used to it and know tonnes about it. My dog is on medication, but he's 8 years old and it's only just started happening (as far as we're aware) do the vets reckon that it's probably something sinister that's causing his seizures. Like a tumour :(
We got him from the rehoming centre (a pound) last October.


----------



## AlyCon

cntrygrl said:


> So thankful that I saw this thread.... :hugs:
> I told a friend that DH and I were TTC. She had only been with her boyfriend for a couple of months. Next thing I know she is now pregnant with twins! Seriously!!!

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


----------



## tink1506

i had a miscarriage a week ago when i told my mum i was preg she seemed happy then we lost our baby we made a memory box my oh showed her her face said it all like a oh for god sake its not like it was born n died hello it was still our baby!! we got the all clear to ttc my oh mentioned something about babies and she said dont u think u should get married first erm .... no mum i dont weddings take time n money to plan n dont happen for a few years once uve started to plan them im not waiting that long for a baby we have all the things you need for a baby from my second lo all we need to get is nappies milk n a few more clothes werecmore than prepared sorry rant over!!


----------



## tamithomas

tink1506 said:


> i had a miscarriage a week ago when i told my mum i was preg she seemed happy then we lost our baby we made a memory box my oh showed her her face said it all like a oh for god sake its not like it was born n died hello it was still our baby!! we got the all clear to ttc my oh mentioned something about babies and she said dont u think u should get married first erm .... no mum i dont weddings take time n money to plan n dont happen for a few years once uve started to plan them im not waiting that long for a baby we have all the things you need for a baby from my second lo all we need to get is nappies milk n a few more clothes werecmore than prepared sorry rant over!!

That is so horrible! I just miscarried this morning and buried the little bean even if it was only 5 weeks old near our garden. Even if it was just a bean, it had potential to be a real child therefore it technically was born and died. :cry: After 3 years of TTC only to lose it really makes you wanna just give the whole thing up. Of course we won't but it just makes you want to. That was soo insensitive of your mom and you have every right to be pissed off at her for those remarks.


----------



## Tasha

I am so sorry for people's insensitivity girls :hugs:

My vent is that I have ultrasound scan on Wednesday, seeing an empty womb will be bad enough, but the fact it will be in the ultrasound where I was told one day before my planned induction that my baby girl no longer had a heartbeat, is going to kill me. I've never been in that part of the hospital again. I dont want to now either :'(


----------



## HWPG

Tasha, I am so sorry you have to go thru that. I can only imagine what a hard day that will be, and I hope you will have someone by your side. Hugs go with you.


----------



## J_Lynn

This is no rant about anything related to babies; but I am going to lose it on this home remodel - no joke, I am never remodeling anything again. It's good we did it - but I am going to lose my mind. I just wanted to tear out the old bathroom and put new stuff in - we picked out the tile, got the shower and bath, got the new toilet, cabinets, sink, etc - and go to put it in yesterday with my daddy and expected a quick one-day project (well, without the laying of the tile of course) and all hell breaks loose. There was an unknown water leak that was so slight that it's been undected for a long while, so it appears. So now the floor is sinking and my dad is now having to fix the foundation under the floor and put new support beams and we have a black mold issue under the bathroom so we have to scrub it with Joy and bleach and then put lye down so it will dry up and no longer be an issue. Everything seems to be going wrong - we have an old home, but sheesh - this is just a nitemare! This is not how I wanted this to work out!! 

I have no idea what I am thinking; now I don't even want to build the other bathroom onto the house in the spring, and I DEFINITELY don't want to be doing the remodel of the kitchen next summer! I HATE HOME REMODELING!


----------



## ChartsNHearts

jcombs35 said:


> ChartsNHearts said:
> 
> 
> I hope you don't mind me joining you in your ranting ladies!
> 
> I also post on another TTC website and someone's post over there has really got me cross today. I don't know why someone would claim that they had experienced/were experiencing chemical pregnancies, when they appear to be saying these things just to seek attention. On the one hand I feel awful doubting her if it's true, but you know when things just don't add up? It makes me angry on behalf of the ladies who do genuinely have experience of chemical pregnancies/miscarriages.
> 
> Hmm. Very strange behaviour! The mind boggles!
> 
> Hmmm.. you're not talking about me are you? I've had nothing but trouble with this last cycle. I think I o'd early, then I had weird spotting, and I had several positive tests, but then a negative doctor's test, and I was sent home to freak out until I miss another AF. (Due tomorrow.) The other night I took a digi to ease my mind, and accidentally set it down in a puddle of water on my sink, and when I went to check it, there was water just dripping off of it, and it said, "not pregnant." And so I took a regular test strip, which had a faint line, but when I posted it, everyone kept saying I probably had a chemical and that's what the spotting was...:growlmad: (Since they're all doctors...)
> 
> So for the time being, until I find out what in the world is going on, I have been bouncing back and forth from ttc to pregnancy forums, searching for someone that may have had this before and what on earth it is.
> 
> I certainly don't mean to offend any of you, and I'm not trying to rub my positives in your faces. I'm confused, and not sure they're accurate, or if I really have had a chemical, or what!!:wacko:Click to expand...

No, I definitely wasn't talking about you! You sound like you're having a really confusing and stressful cycle! I hope you get some answers soon :flower:


----------



## jcombs35

Just making sure. If I ever at any time offend or hurt any one of you, please let me know!!


----------



## LillyLouLou

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

Really happy for my brother and SIL get pg after only 6months of trying (DH and I have been trying for 2 frigging years!) but PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE dont show me the pack the midwife gave you and tell me all about your upcoming scan. 

Heart. Ripped. Out. Hate having to smile through and be happy when I am dying inside.


----------



## zoomlentil

Fizzyfefe said:


> Beginning to think getting a dog was a mistake... She was good for the first two days, but now she is becoming a terror. She tore up the apartment yesterday when we left her alone. Just now, I took her outside to go to the bathroom, and two people stopped to talk to me. She got really aggressive and started growling. Mind you, I have barely ANY human contact, and I was really excited that these guys actually wanted to talk to me. But noooo, the dog freaking acted like they were the spawn of Satan! They weren't doing ANYTHING to freak her out. One guy asked if she was going to hurt them, and I responded "Probably not, but we just got her from the pound on Sunday so we're still learning about her," and his response was, "Oh, never mind..." And then they walked away.
> 
> I needed a companion, but she is NOTHING like how she was when we first got her. She was so sweet and lovable and now she is the complete opposite. I don't want to give up on her, but I can't have a dog that is anti-social and growls at everything and can't be left alone. I'm so upset about this. :(

Try not to give up on her just yet. A pound is a scary, unknown environment for a dog and she probably feels absolutely all over the place. Many dogs act differently to when you first met them once they are in a new home and start to feel comfortable. As a pound dog, she could have any sort of history that has made her how she is. 

As well as going to training classes I would actually invest in a canine behaviourist who can assess your dog properly. Training classes are just that - training, but a behaviourist (a good one) actually has the know-how to get into the mind of the dog and figure out why she's acting like she is and how to fix it. Consider it like a doggy psychologist. 

Another thing, I wouldn't recommend leaving a new dog to have the run of the house while you're out. Even a 'normal' dog can get bored when left alone and an outlet for that may be being destructive. I would restrict her to a certain area of the house where she can't do much damage (ie, a laundry or bathroom) and also start crate training her. A crate trained dog is a wondrous thing and very easy to take or keep anywhere. 

Here's some info on crate training: https://www.apdt.com/veterinary/assets/pdf/APDT_CrateTraining.pdf

Just remember, dogs are complex little creatures with their own feelings and emotions. They too can have mental issues because of negative things that have happened in their life, but can only tell you how they feel in their own language. It's just a matter of learning that language and becoming a pack leader that they can trust. :)


----------



## jcombs35

For the love of God, can we stop bleeding now????????


----------



## tamithomas

Found out I officially miscarried, one friend goes into labor the same day, another one due in a month. Joy... I could just crawl in a hole and die right about now.


----------



## tamithomas

Fizzyfefe: like zoomlentil said, please don't give up on her so easily. Dogs are complex and have their own sets of emotions,fears and anxieties. Maybe bring your dog to a dog behaviorlist? Or just show some patience, she could be petrefied of humans at the moment and just traumatized in general.


----------



## jcombs35

tamithomas said:


> Found out I officially miscarried, one friend goes into labor the same day, another one due in a month. Joy... I could just crawl in a hole and die right about now.

:hugs: Sorry. I know I can't say a whole lot to help, but I do understand your frustration and anger and hurt. :hugs::hugs:


----------



## CaliDreaming

tamithomas said:


> Found out I officially miscarried, one friend goes into labor the same day, another one due in a month. Joy... I could just crawl in a hole and die right about now.

I'm so sorry. :hugs:


----------



## HWPG

i wish i had the balls to go to a Baby Shower - but i am jealous and a coward about facing my friends with so much hurt(tears) in my eyes. I haven't been to a shower in 4 years.


----------



## Fizzyfefe

zoomlentil said:


> Try not to give up on her just yet. A pound is a scary, unknown environment for a dog and she probably feels absolutely all over the place. Many dogs act differently to when you first met them once they are in a new home and start to feel comfortable. As a pound dog, she could have any sort of history that has made her how she is.
> 
> As well as going to training classes I would actually invest in a canine behaviourist who can assess your dog properly. Training classes are just that - training, but a behaviourist (a good one) actually has the know-how to get into the mind of the dog and figure out why she's acting like she is and how to fix it. Consider it like a doggy psychologist.
> 
> Another thing, I wouldn't recommend leaving a new dog to have the run of the house while you're out. Even a 'normal' dog can get bored when left alone and an outlet for that may be being destructive. I would restrict her to a certain area of the house where she can't do much damage (ie, a laundry or bathroom) and also start crate training her. A crate trained dog is a wondrous thing and very easy to take or keep anywhere.
> 
> Here's some info on crate training: https://www.apdt.com/veterinary/assets/pdf/APDT_CrateTraining.pdf
> 
> Just remember, dogs are complex little creatures with their own feelings and emotions. They too can have mental issues because of negative things that have happened in their life, but can only tell you how they feel in their own language. It's just a matter of learning that language and becoming a pack leader that they can trust. :)




tamithomas said:


> Fizzyfefe: like zoomlentil said, please don't give up on her so easily. Dogs are complex and have their own sets of emotions,fears and anxieties. Maybe bring your dog to a dog behaviorlist? Or just show some patience, she could be petrefied of humans at the moment and just traumatized in general.

Ladies, please believe me when I say that I am not giving up on her. I was just REALLY frustrated at the time and venting it out, because I have no one to talk to here. I know it takes time and patience, but believe me, if you came home to the mess I did, you would've been upset, too. It cost a pretty penny to fix what she destroyed.

We got her a crate, and I have been working with her on simple commands like sit, stay, shake, lay down, etc. She gets it sometimes, but, like the vet said, she has a puppy's brain in a dog's body, so I know it will take time. I'm not the type of person to give up on something so easily. She did very well over the weekend when we introduced her to my in-laws and their dog.


----------



## tamithomas

Dear Quebec, MC's are already a hell of a stressful time. Stop making so goddamn more stressful by making me go on a Goose chase to find an English gyno!!!So sick of Quebecers thinking they don't need to know English when they live in Canada!!!!!!


----------



## Gunnhilde

tamithomas said:


> Dear Quebec, MC's are already a hell of a stressful time. Stop making so goddamn more stressful by making me go on a Goose chase to find an English gyno!!!So sick of Quebecers thinking they don't need to know English when they live in Canada!!!!!!

I think sometimes they also pretend not to know it. :winkwink:


----------



## ladeshia

To my friend who is happy to let me know how fertile she is KICK ROCKS!

TO my future kids dad the baby's not gonna get here if we don't try!

To the young teen girls that just pop up pregnant, I envy you!


----------



## tamithomas

Gunnhilde said:


> tamithomas said:
> 
> 
> Dear Quebec, MC's are already a hell of a stressful time. Stop making so goddamn more stressful by making me go on a Goose chase to find an English gyno!!!So sick of Quebecers thinking they don't need to know English when they live in Canada!!!!!!
> 
> I think sometimes they also pretend not to know it. :winkwink:Click to expand...

They do that's the worst part..They don't know how to speak English but yet are capable of keeping a conversation going but answering back in french. I'm the bilingual one but my DH is from Texas and doesn't know a word of french and he has every right to understand everything that is said and my mind is not in the mood to be a translator. I just had a MC Saturday, I'm supposed to be in mourning..not calling 10 different places that are out of town just so I can get an appointment to get some answers. Just so sick of the seperatists. They are whats killing Quebec and alienating us from Canada.


----------



## Fizzyfefe

The dog broke out of her crate twice today AND ran out door once because she caught me off guard. The damn crate is metal. I don't know what the heck to do.


----------



## zoomlentil

Fizzyfefe said:


> The dog broke out of her crate twice today AND ran out door once because she caught me off guard. The damn crate is metal. I don't know what the heck to do.

I really think you need to find a good dog behaviourist before these things get out of hand. It's challenging at the best of times with an easy dog. You might find it will be a lot easier to handle once you've talked to an expert who can explain what you need to do.


----------



## 4magpies

If I'm not in the 2WW I'm waiting to ovulate. 

Just want my baby now. 

I want to make my OH a daddy. He'd be perfect. 

It's the only thing missing from our life now.


----------



## CaliDreaming

zoomlentil said:


> Fizzyfefe said:
> 
> 
> The dog broke out of her crate twice today AND ran out door once because she caught me off guard. The damn crate is metal. I don't know what the heck to do.
> 
> I really think you need to find a good dog behaviourist before these things get out of hand. It's challenging at the best of times with an easy dog. You might find it will be a lot easier to handle once you've talked to an expert who can explain what you need to do.Click to expand...

Fizzyfefe, I totally agree about getting the dog behaviorourist. Especially since once you get knocked up, you will have almost zero time to get these behaviors corrected. I hope you can get it sorted out soon!


----------



## Fizzyfefe

CaliDreaming said:


> zoomlentil said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Fizzyfefe said:
> 
> 
> The dog broke out of her crate twice today AND ran out door once because she caught me off guard. The damn crate is metal. I don't know what the heck to do.
> 
> I really think you need to find a good dog behaviourist before these things get out of hand. It's challenging at the best of times with an easy dog. You might find it will be a lot easier to handle once you've talked to an expert who can explain what you need to do.Click to expand...
> 
> Fizzyfefe, I totally agree about getting the dog behaviorourist. Especially since once you get knocked up, you will have almost zero time to get these behaviors corrected. I hope you can get it sorted out soon!Click to expand...

Knocked up :rofl: I hope so!

Yes, definitely sounds like a good idea, ladies. I obviously can't do this on my own. Thank you for all you advice.

On another note, I want to vent that my husband is kind of a slob! He doesn't pick up after himself and it's driving me nuuuuuts.


----------



## AlyCon

I hate when my sister always tries to put her kid off on some one else! Since the day my niece was born my sister has been needing a babysitter (which is always a family member) constantly and putting her daycare and then still needing a babysitter on the days shes supposed to be home with her! I know shes trying to finish her degree and working so its not like shes lazy but she just does EVERYTHING except watch her kid! and its not like shes a little quiet baby, my niece is 21 months but shes got a head start on her TERRIBLE TWOS!! omg shes always bouncing all over the place and NEVER listens! and shes really smart so i know she understands, she just doesnt want to behave!! And then my sister has the nervve to get mad when one of us says my niece is bad! shes like no shes not bad shes just a busy body, but we're like NO SHES BAD! and then she got mad at my mom for saying "Well maybe if you stayed home with her more you could work on her bahavior and she wouldnt misbehave all the time" my sister took it as an insult but its TRUE. My sister doesnt think her kid is misbehaved because shes not around her enough to experience it full force. Either that or she KNOWS shes bad and she works and goes to school to avoid her own kid. Yep thats it. Cuz she doesnt need a whole lot of money and she could take her classes online if she wanted to, but she chooses not to and keeps leaving her kid with everybody else. This only makes me angry because i would give anything to be a mom and i plan to be a stay at home mom for my kids 100% and here she is taking her child for granted and not even spending time with her. ugh!! selfish people make me mad!!!

Edit to Add: I couldnt even finish my post at first because right while i was typing my niece came up to me screaming her lungs out and throwing things at me demanding her sippy cup!! I'm keeping an eye on her right now while my sister is UPSTAIRS on skype with her boyfriend. this is the BS i'm talking about!!!


----------



## Gunnhilde

AlyCon said:


> I hate when my sister always tries to put her kid off on some one else! Since the day my niece was born my sister has been needing a babysitter (which is always a family member) constantly and putting her daycare and then still needing a babysitter on the days shes supposed to be home with her! I know shes trying to finish her degree and working so its not like shes lazy but she just does EVERYTHING except watch her kid! and its not like shes a little quiet baby, my niece is 21 months but shes got a head start on her TERRIBLE TWOS!! omg shes always bouncing all over the place and NEVER listens! and shes really smart so i know she understands, she just doesnt want to behave!! And then my sister has the nervve to get mad when one of us says my niece is bad! shes like no shes not bad shes just a busy body, but we're like NO SHES BAD! and then she got mad at my mom for saying "Well maybe if you stayed home with her more you could work on her bahavior and she wouldnt misbehave all the time" my sister took it as an insult but its TRUE. My sister doesnt think her kid is misbehaved because shes not around her enough to experience it full force. Either that or she KNOWS shes bad and she works and goes to school to avoid her own kid. Yep thats it. Cuz she doesnt need a whole lot of money and she could take her classes online if she wanted to, but she chooses not to and keeps leaving her kid with everybody else. This only makes me angry because i would give anything to be a mom and i plan to be a stay at home mom for my kids 100% and here she is taking her child for granted and not even spending time with her. ugh!! selfish people make me mad!!!
> 
> Edit to Add: I couldnt even finish my post at first because right while i was typing my niece came up to me screaming her lungs out and throwing things at me demanding her sippy cup!! I'm keeping an eye on her right now while my sister is UPSTAIRS on skype with her boyfriend. this is the BS i'm talking about!!!

A child is never "bad". Sounds like typical toddler and preschooler behavior.

If you said that about my child, I'd be pissed too. Actually, I'd be more than pissed - I'd probably tell you that you weren't welcome around her anymore.


----------



## AlyCon

Gunnhilde said:


> A child is never "bad". Sounds like typical toddler and preschooler behavior.
> 
> If you said that about my child, I'd be pissed too. Actually, I'd be more than pissed - I'd probably tell you that you weren't welcome around her anymore.

well as you can see midway through my post i started using the word "misbehaved." Because thats what i meant. Within my family we use the word bad because we're not the most Politically Correct people. But yea i meant misbehaved. And my sister doesnt get seriously mad when we say it, she only got mad when my mom said she should be home with her more. and my sister would never ban me from seeing her because like i said.. she always needs a babysitter, which is usually ME lol thus, my rant.


----------



## cntrygrl

Hmmm for some reason I thought this was a VENT THREAD..... Not tell someone they're right or wrong for how they feel THREAD.


----------



## Gunnhilde

cntrygrl said:


> Hmmm for some reason I thought this was a VENT THREAD..... Not tell someone they're right or wrong for how they feel THREAD.

Nobody was telling anyone she was right or wrong, but as a mother, calling a small child "bad" just got me very upset.

Sorry.


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## nic18

*cntrygirl-*totally agree


----------



## cntrygrl

I'll send you my two nephews and you'll rethink about children not being "bad/misbehaved".


----------



## Gunnhilde

cntrygrl said:


> I'll send you my two nephews and you'll rethink about children not being "bad/misbehaved".

Sorry, but I have an incredibly high needs child who has frequent meltdowns and temper tantrums. She destroys things, she lies, and she screams. It takes a village to parent her and it is a normal part of parenting to have to deal with some children who are very compliant and others who are not.

Toddlers really can't be "bad." It is just part of being a toddler.


----------



## Sass827

Let's have a real moment here Gunhilde - you've reprimanded me on this board too. It's a vent board. Just let people vent. It's a safe place to not be judged. Please leave it at that. 

You know what's really cool AlyCon - what goes around comes around and by that I mean when your niece is a teen, or even a pre-teen, your sister will pay for not teaching her how to act now, while she is little and easy to mold. Hope this helps get you through your days :)


----------



## Gunnhilde

Sass827 said:


> Let's have a real moment here Gunhilde - you've reprimanded me on this board too. It's a vent board. Just let people vent. It's a safe place to not be judged. Please leave it at that.
> 
> You know what's really cool AlyCon - what goes around comes around and by that I mean when your niece is a teen, or even a pre-teen, your sister will pay for not teaching her how to act now, while she is little and easy to mold. Hope this helps get you through your days :)

Fine, I'll unsubscribe.


----------



## AlyCon

My sister tries, but my niece is somewhat out of control. And i dont mind helping, i just wish she didnt need my help so often.


----------



## kassiaethne

yeah I know what you mean about the whole child has no boundries at home so why would she bother with listening to people outside of home? If mom doesn't care why should she listen to others? It all starts at home with the parents in my eyes, no matter how the kid acts it is a reflection on your parenting if it is a majority of the time. And in my eyes I think it is wrong to pawn off your kid to family under any circumstance period. It should be a last case sinario or it should be every once in a while. 

Grandparents and aunts are ment to be that, and enjoy their grandchild and nephew and not be the substitute parents practically because you want to get your life going. It isn't YOUR job to raise what came out of her vagaga. and if it came at a bad time, sorry still her responsibility. It is her job. and she should be grateful and appreciative of when you take her but I've noticed a lot of society now a days thinks its all well and good and YOUR responsibility to be there to raise your family members child too. And people forget you don't HAVE to, it is a curtsy and kindness and just take that for granted and think its your obligation and it isn't. And god forbid you say so because then you don't "love your niece or nephew or grandchild." 

Sorry but that is wrong and it is understandable that you get frustrated. Because she's putting a burden on you that is hers to bare, especially knowing how her child acts. It is HER job to monitor it and direct her away from that behavior, not yours. So I completely feel for you. Especially because there really isn't anything you can say about it without coming out like the bad guy even though she's in the wrong.


----------



## Gunnhilde

AlyCon said:


> My sister tries, but my niece is somewhat out of control. And i dont mind helping, i just wish she didnt need my help so often.

Sorry for responding so strongly - it is just what your mother says is exactly what my mother says to me as part of her verbal abuse of me. It cut a little deep. Yes, I do have to go to school full time and yes I do have to skype with my future husband sometimes. I wish I had more time to spend with DD, but sometimes I don't, you know what I mean?


----------



## Fizzyfefe

I'm so mad at my pharmacy and my dog that I could just spit! We had to transfer from Walgreens to CVS because of our new insurance. I ran out of Levothroid the day before yesterday, and took my bottle over so the prescription could be refilled. The pharmacist was very rude when he told me that it would take 24 hours for the prescription to be transferred from Walgreens. I said it wasn't a problem, and that I would be back the next day to get it.

Well, someone from CVS called me today looking for someone named "Marie," which is not my name, and left a message to return the call. So, I called back and told them that they had the name wrong, but were they still trying to reach me? The man said no, that it was the wrong number. I had a feeling that they were trying to reach me, but I just let it go.

I asked my husband to pick up my prescription on the way home from work, since I couldn't go today because I apparently can no longer leave my freaking dog alone (she broke out of ANOTHER, stronger crate and we don't have the money to replace it- that's $300 down the drain). When he got there, they told him they were out of the 150 mcg and could not supplement the generic brand for a few days until they could get the shipment in. So, obviously, they were trying to get a hold of me earlier, but had the wrong name!

We have called every pharmacy in town, and only one has the 150 mcg in stock. My husband has to drive an hour just to go get a few pills to last me until the new shipment arrives. What bothers me the most is that not only can they not give me the generic brand (long story- it has to do with different ingredients between the name brands and generic brands and it "apparently" will mess with my levels THAT MUCH) for a couple freaking days, but they also cannot give me two 75 mcg pills. WTF!! 75 + 75 = 150! It is not that hard! The tech said she would have to call my doctor (who lives in another state) to get permission to give me two 75 mcg pills instead of one 150 mcg, which is absurd! Doctors write scrips ALL THE TIME for 20 mg, and if the pharmacy only has 10 mg pills, then they tell the patient to take two! It's not difficult! They would rather me have no pills for a few days than give me one or two generic pills. And I am SO aggravated that I can't go take care of this myself because my freaking dog has the worst case of separation anxiety that I've ever seen.

ad;gkajn;aef;aasd;ji gionsd;ij;f (<--- head banging on keyboard)

Rant over.


----------



## AlyCon

*Kassiaethne:* omg its like you took the words right out of my mouth!! Me and my sister have had that fight before where i've said NO to babysitting and she acted like i said i hated my niece and never wanted to see her again (and shes had the same fight with my mom and our other sister!). Its like she thinks that just because im not busy that i should automatically say yes to babysitting, but thats not true. If i want to have a quiet evening to myself to just sit and watch tv and scratch my ass- NOT taking care of some one elses child- then i should be able to do so, without being made to feel guilty about it!! And thats what really bothers me the most is that not only is she taking her child for granted but shes not even grateful to us for watching her cuz she feels entitled to it. and like you said, if you have leave your child with others at least make sure theyre well behaved!!!! 

*Gunnhilde:* Its okay, every one has the right to their opinion, and like i said my family has our own little language so people often look at us like we're rude or crazy when we're really not trying to be lol And i'm sorry about your mom. I read that you said your child has a higher level of needs, and thats not something you can control. If anything your mom should be even more of a support for you and not use that against you. I hope that gets better for you :hugs:


----------



## J_Lynn

Fizzyfefe said:


> I'm so mad at my pharmacy and my dog that I could just spit! We had to transfer from Walgreens to CVS because of our new insurance. I ran out of Levothroid the day before yesterday, and took my bottle over so the prescription could be refilled. The pharmacist was very rude when he told me that it would take 24 hours for the prescription to be transferred from Walgreens. I said it wasn't a problem, and that I would be back the next day to get it.
> 
> Well, someone from CVS called me today looking for someone named "Marie," which is not my name, and left a message to return the call. So, I called back and told them that they had the name wrong, but were they still trying to reach me? The man said no, that it was the wrong number. I had a feeling that they were trying to reach me, but I just let it go.
> 
> I asked my husband to pick up my prescription on the way home from work, since I couldn't go today because I apparently can no longer leave my freaking dog alone (she broke out of ANOTHER, stronger crate and we don't have the money to replace it- that's $300 down the drain). When he got there, they told him they were out of the 150 mcg and could not supplement the generic brand for a few days until they could get the shipment in. So, obviously, they were trying to get a hold of me earlier, but had the wrong name!
> 
> We have called every pharmacy in town, and only one has the 150 mcg in stock. My husband has to drive an hour just to go get a few pills to last me until the new shipment arrives. What bothers me the most is that not only can they not give me the generic brand (long story- it has to do with different ingredients between the name brands and generic brands and it "apparently" will mess with my levels THAT MUCH) for a couple freaking days, but they also cannot give me two 75 mcg pills. WTF!! 75 + 75 = 150! It is not that hard! The tech said she would have to call my doctor (who lives in another state) to get permission to give me two 75 mcg pills instead of one 150 mcg, which is absurd! Doctors write scrips ALL THE TIME for 20 mg, and if the pharmacy only has 10 mg pills, then they tell the patient to take two! It's not difficult! They would rather me have no pills for a few days than give me one or two generic pills. And I am SO aggravated that I can't go take care of this myself because my freaking dog has the worst case of separation anxiety that I've ever seen.
> 
> ad;gkajn;aef;aasd;ji gionsd;ij;f (<--- head banging on keyboard)
> 
> Rant over.

Have you tried giving your dog the anxiety pills they sell at Petsmart? I think they sell them at Walmart also ... they did wonders for my insane full-size dachshund that literally ate through metal crates like it was a candy bar. Also, maybe try brewing up a batch of camomile tea then chill it and have her drink it ... that will calm as well. 

Just a few ideas :) I have dealt with crazy dogs also and it will test your patience and make you want to cry, but you'll find something that works :) 

....and if all else fails, try a benadryl - I had to give it to my puppy for a snake bite, and that stuff knocked his butt out cold. And he's a 9lb miniature dachshund who, I swear, snorts coke when I can't see because he is the most high-strung psycho dog I've ever had - he's been like that since he was 4 weeks old. lol

Edit: 

Here's the link to a couple: 

https://www.walmart.com/ip/Pro-Pet-Anti-Stress-Calming-Tabs-Supplement-60-ct/13281261

https://www.petco.com/N_22_4294956712/Dog-Calming-Aids.aspx


----------



## Fizzyfefe

J_Lynn said:


> Have you tried giving your dog the anxiety pills they sell at Petsmart? I think they sell them at Walmart also ... they did wonders for my insane full-size dachshund that literally ate through metal crates like it was a candy bar. Also, maybe try brewing up a batch of camomile tea then chill it and have her drink it ... that will calm as well.
> 
> Just a few ideas :) I have dealt with crazy dogs also and it will test your patience and make you want to cry, but you'll find something that works :)
> 
> ....and if all else fails, try a benadryl - I had to give it to my puppy for a snake bite, and that stuff knocked his butt out cold. And he's a 9lb miniature dachshund who, I swear, snorts coke when I can't see because he is the most high-strung psycho dog I've ever had - he's been like that since he was 4 weeks old. lol
> 
> Edit:
> 
> Here's the link to a couple:
> 
> https://www.walmart.com/ip/Pro-Pet-Anti-Stress-Calming-Tabs-Supplement-60-ct/13281261
> 
> https://www.petco.com/N_22_4294956712/Dog-Calming-Aids.aspx

She is the same! Eats metal and plastic and her brand new orthopedic bed like it's the most delicious meal on the planet. My hubby suggested medicating her, but I haven't actually done it yet. I thought he was just joking about the Benadryl, but now that you mention it, I think we will actually go ahead and do it. She is controlling our lives because we can't ever leave her alone. Thank you so much for your suggestions. :D


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## luvmybug

I really thought that this month was my month, I was soooo sure of it. I mean I was developing a close relationship with the toilet and my boobs are killing me and on a serious 'you can look but don't touch'status. I was even two days late, I got my hopes up and started to get excited then without any cramps or pain or warning on came the period. It wasn't even heavy at all and only lasted two days. I'm so hurt and frustrated by this I just want to cry my eyes out. My doctor tells me that things 'look' okay and she can't tell me what's wrong, she also refuses to help me with any infertility treatments. I'm getting more and more discouraged and I feel like its hurting my relationship, I just don't know what else to do anymore. :-( Hurtin


----------



## BlondeShorty

Fizzyfefe said:


> Beginning to think getting a dog was a mistake... She was good for the first two days, but now she is becoming a terror. She tore up the apartment yesterday when we left her alone. Just now, I took her outside to go to the bathroom, and two people stopped to talk to me. She got really aggressive and started growling. Mind you, I have barely ANY human contact, and I was really excited that these guys actually wanted to talk to me. But noooo, the dog freaking acted like they were the spawn of Satan! They weren't doing ANYTHING to freak her out. One guy asked if she was going to hurt them, and I responded "Probably not, but we just got her from the pound on Sunday so we're still learning about her," and his response was, "Oh, never mind..." And then they walked away.
> 
> I needed a companion, but she is NOTHING like how she was when we first got her. She was so sweet and lovable and now she is the complete opposite. I don't want to give up on her, but I can't have a dog that is anti-social and growls at everything and can't be left alone. I'm so upset about this. :(

Ok I know you've vented since this about your dog.. :hugs: What kind of dog is she? .. Since she's a rescue I know that may be hard to answer, but what I mean is, is she going to be a bigger dog? small size, medium? 

I had a dog that did a lot of what your'e talking about.. She loved being in her crate as long as we were home. It got to the point where I'd let her have free roam when I left the house and gave her treats and she was fine. This was after going through many a crate with her. There was even the day I finally bought a bunch of padlocks that I attached to the hinges on a metal crate and put the crate so it was facing a wall. .. Until she figured out how to rip the door off of it by throwing all 85lbs of her weight at it. :doh:

She also would growl at people when I walked her.. but was fine with DH. We finally discovered that she calmed down after a while with me but in the beginning the growling made me nervous and she picked up on this energy which made it worse. We also think she was trying to "protect" me. It took a lot of patience but eventually we got her out of the habit.. lots of treats were brought with me on walks to help this along.. I did have a muzzle on her in the beginning though some times I walked her if I knew there would be a lot of people around so that I felt better mentally and less nervous about her acting agressive. Near the end, I didn't have to use it at all.. 

Just wanted to share this and let you know it should get better with time. :hugs: Some dogs just have a harder time adjusting.. 
As everyone else has said.. a behaviourist is an excellent idea in this situation.
I hope it gets better for you. :thumbup:


----------



## kassiaethne

AlyCon said:


> *Kassiaethne:* omg its like you took the words right out of my mouth!! Me and my sister have had that fight before where i've said NO to babysitting and she acted like i said i hated my niece and never wanted to see her again (and shes had the same fight with my mom and our other sister!). Its like she thinks that just because im not busy that i should automatically say yes to babysitting, but thats not true. If i want to have a quiet evening to myself to just sit and watch tv and scratch my ass- NOT taking care of some one elses child- then i should be able to do so, without being made to feel guilty about it!! And thats what really bothers me the most is that not only is she taking her child for granted but shes not even grateful to us for watching her cuz she feels entitled to it. and like you said, if you have leave your child with others at least make sure theyre well behaved!!!!


one thing you could try is next time she drops her off to be babysat, wait till shes going to leave and just say strait out "I am tired of you taking my love for my niece for granted and assuming just because I have no kids of my own and aren't busy all the time means I'm suppose to be up for babysitting anytime. I love her and care for her but you taking advantage of that and not even saying thank you or acting grateful for me helping you out when you need it is grating on me. AND I could use a little appreciation for my taking time out of my life to mother your child instead of you mothering her yourself, I'm her aunt not her surrogate mother you know, so you're welcome" and let her go, granted it will probably start another fight but maybe it will open her eyes that this isn't an obligation but helping her. 

or you could say it in a non pissed off way of "hey I don't appreciate you taking advantage of my love of my niece and always leaving me to babysit her without so much as a thank you in appreciation for helping you out. I'm not saying I don't love having her around and shes my niece and I love her but it is how you act about just leaving her without showing the least bit of appreciation for my own sacrifices of time and such, only that you need it done is hurtful. She is my niece not my daughter and I sometimes wish you'd let her be my niece instead of making it feel like I'm her mother and you're the aunt. " betcha that will make her think about it more. No one wants to be seen as not the mother of their own child. Makes them reevaluate things and wonder if that is how their child is starting to see you too. 

I remember when I was babysitting someones child a lot and the child called me mom in front of the mother (first time slip and of COURSE it had to be in FRONT of the mom) and the mom had this mortified look on her face like omg I'm the worst mom in the world if my own daughter doesn't see me as mom. (lol and the woman was a great mom, home schooled both her kids it was just a accidental slip from the baby and never happened again) I had to sit there and be all "No I'm not mom" points at the mom "THAT is mom I am catherine..Ca...th...er...in..." LOL needless to say she didn't have me babysit for a while (can't blame her she felt her world was rocked and wanted to smother her baby with her time. but eventually lol she needed to go out with her husband again and her son refused any other babysitter but me and we all moved on) 



Just anything to shake her out of the you're doing it cuz you're her aunt and of course you should want to watch her 24/7. Who knows it may not do anything at all, but at least you'll have put it out there and hope that a seed of appreciation might bloom from her subconscious and you might get a thank you every once in a while


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## BlondeShorty

VENT NUMBER 1-

TO THE PEOPLE THAT LIVE IN MY NEIGHBOURHOOD:
I love that many of you own dogs as I am a dog person myself. However, there are leash laws for a reason! Not to mention that we are in a new community that still has houses being built!! Having your dog running around without a leash when you're not supervising them is a very stupid idea. .. The contractors that go through our neighbourhood don't always obey the speed limit and I always cringe because I'm worried that someone's dog is going to get run over. .. Did I mention that the field where they're going to be building the school has had coyote tracks in it that I found one day? We're still a ways out of the city and closer to wilderness.. so it's not beyond the realm of possibility that coyotes still come by at night.. we can hear them howling loud and clear at night! 

Vent 2 -Lady that decided to let her dog roam 20 feet away from her house. Your dog was in the middle of the freaking road, which is why I pulled over as I thought he was lost. When he ran back to your house and I told you, I wasn't trying to be rude.. I was just concerned and then happy that the dog wasn't truly lost.. However, weren't you concerned that he was going so far down the sidewalk? He wasn't even in eyeshot of your house anymore! We're right next to a busy highway frequented by transport trucks. :doh: You seemed more annoyed that I came up and bothered you about your dog. .. Also why was he limping? If he was mine and limping like that, I wouldn't be letting him out of my sight, nor would I let him be sniffing around construction sites..



Vent 3- People that like to have your little dogs run around unsupervised without a leash. Especially the parents that let their small kids take their dog out on walks unattended and without a leash. .. I think it's great your dog has excellent recall, is friendly and comes when called. But some of your dogs aren't very bright. .. My male dog is very uneasy around little dogs as he doesn't realize he can't play with them like he does big dogs. Also, if your dog comes running up to me, mine sometimes thinks your dog is going after me and feels the need to protect me. .. This is why I tend to cross the street if you come walking by me.. I'm not willing to risk an unpleasant encounter. Especially if a child is walking the dog and they don't get that mine needs a bit of time to warm up to their dog.. If your dog isn't on a leash though and comes running at us, or follows me when I am doing my best to keep my male dog from noticing.. we have a bit of a problem. I have had some of your dogs "follow" me when not on their leash .. One of you has already complained to me about my "vicious" dog when you're the idiot that decided to let your dog run out of the house without a leash. I was on the other side of the road and when your dog came near me barking and yapping, got my very upset dog away and had him sit down and wait until he was calm. Your dog not realizing he was upsetting mine, then tried to follow me barking and growling like crazy, only upsetting my dog more.. and yet you were mad at me? Had your dog been on a leash or had you bothered calling your dog back, my dog wouldn't have had the opportunity to try and snap at yours after _your_ dog came at him growling and barking!! Last time I checked, I was the one trying to be the responsible pet owner here.. :growlmad:


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## nic18

vent to my OH - when your getting up for work set your own alarm so its not me putting it on snooze every 10mins while you sleep through it, when i put the alarm to your ear so you can hear it to don't look at me and say 'what' cause i want to hit you, and don't fart in the bed especially when they smell eggy i will be sick. when you actually get out of bed understand i don't need to get up yet, and stop talking to the cats like they are babies! i can hear you and you are annoying me, when you get to work i don't want to know you have the 'shits' when i'm still sleeping honestly grow up :)! 

ahhh rant over


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## laurac1988

ARGH DP's work have changed her holiday dates!!! We might not be able to go to NYC :-(
She originally booked her holiday for 10th - 24th september when she started the job, but when she got the slip back for the holiday they had approved not those dates, but the 1st to 14th September. She asked them three times to change it, but they didn't, so in the end she told them not to worry, and she will book a holiday around the new dates. 

Having booked NYC and had it booked for a few months, TODAY they tell her they've changed it back to the original dates. They do not match the dates I have off work. The reason they have changed it back is that her new dates cover most of the paralympics. 

She's spoke to her manager who wanted to see the booking, so she showed it to her and she still refused to change the holiday. I've just phoned and spoken to ACAS ad they said they need to gove her notice that is twice the length of the holiday if they wish to change or cancel it, which they have not done. they haven't given her anything in writing to say the holiday has been changed and hadn't told her until today, despite the manager saying it was changed in April. I've sent her back in to her manager with the written confirmation of dates that she was given.


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## Workinonbaby2

We've been trying for a little over a year now and yes I'm only 22 close to 23 but my soon to be hubby is 27 and we are ready for number 2. I work for the state of florida and he drives for pepsi we make decent money to support. We have our own means of transportation, our own house and we obivously have been able to afford our first :) I've got baby fever something fierce.

my cousin- just had a baby and she's absolutely adorable.
one of my friends from school- is prego just found out it's a girl
3 people i work with- prego and showing
my mother- think about it before you guys decide to have number 2 it's all in your head
my best friend - are you stupid

we aren't stupid, everybody's getting pregnant it seems except me and no it's not all in my head it's something we are ready for landen is already almost 2 and potty trained


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## cntrygrl

Workinonbaby2 said:


> We've been trying for a little over a year now and yes I'm only 22 close to 23 but my soon to be hubby is 27 and we are ready for number 2. I work for the state of florida and he drives for pepsi we make decent money to support. We have our own means of transportation, our own house and we obivously have been able to afford our first :) I've got baby fever something fierce.
> 
> my cousin- just had a baby and she's absolutely adorable.
> one of my friends from school- is prego just found out it's a girl
> 3 people i work with- prego and showing
> my mother- think about it before you guys decide to have number 2 it's all in your head
> my best friend - are you stupid
> 
> we aren't stupid, everybody's getting pregnant it seems except me and no it's not all in my head it's something we are ready for landen is already almost 2 and potty trained

Hahaha Try being 30 (31 next month) TTC first child without success and having your younger brother, cousins, friends getting pregnant all around you. Some are even just oops babies. Believe me I understand the baby fever.


----------



## HWPG

cntrygrl said:


> Hahaha Try being 30 (31 next month) TTC first child without success and having your younger brother, cousins, friends getting pregnant all around you. Some are even just oops babies. Believe me I understand the baby fever.

31.5yo, second time ttc #1 (once with XH, now with BF), and both times your sister and best friend both get pregnant.


----------



## HWPG

HWPG said:


> cntrygrl said:
> 
> 
> Hahaha Try being 30 (31 next month) TTC first child without success and having your younger brother, cousins, friends getting pregnant all around you. Some are even just oops babies. Believe me I understand the baby fever.
> 
> 31.5yo, second time ttc #1 (once with XH, now with BF), and both times your sister and best friend both get pregnant.Click to expand...

ps. sorry, not comparing, just adding in the sympathies....


----------



## Sass827

I've had the fever for six months so badly that I can't enjoy the zoo or shopping anymore. Too many babies! I forget to even look at clothes. I just want too buy maternity gear. Hubs and I are both 30, well off and dying to ttc #1.


----------



## CaliDreaming

To the outside world: 

If you found out that one of your best friend's children died, you would NOT console them by telling them they should be happy because "at least they have a child."

So why would you tell me, a person suffering with seondary infertility, that I shouldn't feel sad over my inability to conceive another child because I've had a child? You can feel happy about what you have in your life while at the same time grieving loss in your life. 

Newsflash: infertility is painful whether you've had one kids or ten kids. When you still have the yearning for more children, the only thing that makes that yearning go away is having more children. 

Also, quit asking me when I'm going to give my child a sibling. Yes, I know she is asking about babies. Yes, I know now is a "good age" for her to get one. I am doing all that I can.


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## babymabey

I hate feeling baby envy! I have 4 friends who are expecting (3 of the are baby number 3 and 4), my cousin is expecting, and I just found out that my brother's wife is expecting. They have been married for about a month. Supposedly they weren't trying, but I think she did it on purpose because she assures my brother that she was on BCP, but she has been hinting about babies for months. My brother divorced my sister-in-law (whom I love dearly) for this chick, and he has one son with my SIL. He repeatedly told his new wife that he wanted to wait for kids, but she kept pressing how much she wanted one. That is why I think she stopped taking her pills to purposely get pregnant and then just tell everyone is was "unplanned".
The other thing that I hate is when people post about their BFP's on the TTC forums. Someone just did that on another thread I am subscribed to. This person has only been TTC for 2 months! I know they are just excited and I really am happy for everyone who is expecting, but posting about it on the TTC forums or constantly doing updates on facebook of ultrasound pics and information on the babies development just reminds the rest of us who are having a hard time that it has been yet another month without a BFP.

I want to just cry right now :cry:


----------



## AlyCon

babymabey said:


> The other thing that I hate is when people post about their BFP's on the TTC forums. Someone just did that on another thread I am subscribed to. This person has only been TTC for 2 months! I know they are just excited and I really am happy for everyone who is expecting, but posting about it on the TTC forums or constantly doing updates on facebook of ultrasound pics and information on the babies development just reminds the rest of us who are having a hard time that it has been yet another month without a BFP.
> 
> I want to just cry right now :cry:

I understand what you mean about that but since we're all on this journey together i like to see other women get their BFPs. Even though it does sting a little, i am still happy for them. One thread im subscribed to is all women with PCOS and theres been 14 BFPs so far and it gives the rest of us hope. And also if its on a thread about a particular method/ treatment (SMEP, OPKs, BBTT, metformin, clomid, vitex, fertilaid, fertibella, geritol, preseed, conceive plus etc.) then i think seeing people get BPPs trying them shows other women that the same method may work for them. It only annoys me when some one creates a whole new thread about it. Im like just post it on the threads you've already been talking to people on because theyre the ones who will care the most. But at least this website is about TTC and Pregnancy/ Motherhood so its to be expected. on facebook it catches me off guard and ruins my whole day!!! I've unsubscribed and hid about ten girls from my timeline!


----------



## J_Lynn

HWPG said:


> cntrygrl said:
> 
> 
> Hahaha Try being 30 (31 next month) TTC first child without success and having your younger brother, cousins, friends getting pregnant all around you. Some are even just oops babies. Believe me I understand the baby fever.
> 
> 31.5yo, second time ttc #1 (once with XH, now with BF), and both times your sister and best friend both get pregnant.Click to expand...

I'm in the same boat almost .... 29 in November; ttc #1 for 6 years total (between xh and current -andlastlol- dh) and literally everyone around me has kids - even my sister got pregnant when she was 15 with no issues. Pisses me off. :wacko:


----------



## babymabey

AlyCon said:


> babymabey said:
> 
> 
> The other thing that I hate is when people post about their BFP's on the TTC forums. Someone just did that on another thread I am subscribed to. This person has only been TTC for 2 months! I know they are just excited and I really am happy for everyone who is expecting, but posting about it on the TTC forums or constantly doing updates on facebook of ultrasound pics and information on the babies development just reminds the rest of us who are having a hard time that it has been yet another month without a BFP.
> 
> I want to just cry right now :cry:
> 
> I understand what you mean about that but since we're all on this journey together i like to see other women get their BFPs. Even though it does sting a little, i am still happy for them. One thread im subscribed to is all women with PCOS and theres been 14 BFPs so far and it gives the rest of us hope. And also if its on a thread about a particular method/ treatment (SMEP, OPKs, BBTT, metformin, clomid, vitex, fertilaid, fertibella, geritol, preseed, conceive plus etc.) then i think seeing people get BPPs trying them shows other women that the same method may work for them. It only annoys me when some one creates a whole new thread about it. Im like just post it on the threads you've already been talking to people on because theyre the ones who will care the most. But at least this website is about TTC and Pregnancy/ Motherhood so its to be expected. on facebook it catches me off guard and ruins my whole day!!! I've unsubscribed and hid about ten girls from my timeline!Click to expand...

I am definitely happy for them, and I understand that it is a journey we take together, I was just frustrated because this individual acted like it took them so long to conceive, when they got their BFP on the second month TTC. I am in my TWW now, but I just keep having this anxiety that I missed it, even though we followed the SMEP and had sex the day of my positive OPK, then the next 2 days. 

I'm just having a bad day. :cry:


----------



## AlyCon

babymabey said:


> I am definitely happy for them, and I understand that it is a journey we take together, I was just frustrated because this individual acted like it took them so long to conceive, when they got their BFP on the second month TTC. I am in my TWW now, but I just keep having this anxiety that I missed it, even though we followed the SMEP and had sex the day of my positive OPK, then the next 2 days.
> 
> I'm just having a bad day. :cry:

Oh yea lol I know what you mean. Their post is like "After two looongg months and 1 whole BFN, i FINALLY got my BFP!!" and im just like Oh really? :coffee: and it especially annoys me when they make it a new thread and then dont even give advice on what they did to get the BFP. Its like "Got my BFP! Screw everybody else! Just wanted to rub this in your face before i frolic over to first tri and leave you infertiles in the dust!" its just not right :nope: Good luck to you though, I hope this is your month :dust:


----------



## 4magpies

Annoys the fuck out of me. Reported a post in one of the TTC forums just now for a BFP announcement. Twats.


----------



## AlyCon

4magpies said:


> Annoys the fuck out of me. Reported a post in one of the TTC forums just now for a BFP announcement. Twats.

:haha::haha: Hahahaha!! I just laughed so hard at that!!! :rofl::rofl:


----------



## 4magpies

I'm in a cranky blunt mood today. No time for idiots. 

My rant today is I wish my ovaries would behave themselves and bloody ovulate already. 

Having sex every night is great fun, but very tiring. Give me a break! Exhausted!!


----------



## baby1wanted

AlyCon said:


> 4magpies said:
> 
> 
> Annoys the fuck out of me. Reported a post in one of the TTC forums just now for a BFP announcement. Twats.
> 
> :haha::haha: Hahahaha!! I just laughed so hard at that!!! :rofl::rofl:Click to expand...

I'm a little confused to be honest (new to the forum) - I'm subscribed to a fair few threads in TTC all joining up people in a similar cycle - we're going to be testing in September. If I get my BFP (not likely but you never know) does that mean that I can't tell people that I've spent 4+ weeks discussing the cycle with? Completely understand not putting random BFP announcements into TTC but would be a bit odd not to share good news at the end of a cycle? I read somewhere that's it's ok to do in in threads in 2WW but what about threads that you join whilst you're waiting to ovulate and so are in TTC?


----------



## CaliDreaming

baby1wanted said:


> I'm a little confused to be honest (new to the forum) - I'm subscribed to a fair few threads in TTC all joining up people in a similar cycle - we're going to be testing in September. If I get my BFP (not likely but you never know) does that mean that I can't tell people that I've spent 4+ weeks discussing the cycle with? Completely understand not putting random BFP announcements into TTC but would be a bit odd not to share good news at the end of a cycle? I read somewhere that's it's ok to do in in threads in 2WW but what about threads that you join whilst you're waiting to ovulate and so are in TTC?

From what I can gather, you can't start a separate thread in the TTC sections just to announce a BFP. You have to do that in the BFP announcement thread. You can announce a BFP within a thread in the TTC sections where appropriate though, like a due date club or as a followup on a question about certain supplements, techniques, etc. Also, threads about if you have a question about early symptoms and whether you could be pregnant are o.k. too. However, threads posting pictures of HPTs asking whether they are positive are not should go in the HPT/OPK section I believe.

I'm not sure, but I believe the main TTC forum is not as strict as say, the LTTC forum because it is supposed to be a TTC forum for everybody and the separate sections are for when you just want a group of women who are going through the same issues as you.


----------



## baby1wanted

CaliDreaming said:


> baby1wanted said:
> 
> 
> I'm a little confused to be honest (new to the forum) - I'm subscribed to a fair few threads in TTC all joining up people in a similar cycle - we're going to be testing in September. If I get my BFP (not likely but you never know) does that mean that I can't tell people that I've spent 4+ weeks discussing the cycle with? Completely understand not putting random BFP announcements into TTC but would be a bit odd not to share good news at the end of a cycle? I read somewhere that's it's ok to do in in threads in 2WW but what about threads that you join whilst you're waiting to ovulate and so are in TTC?
> 
> From what I can gather, you can't start a separate thread in the TTC sections just to announce a BFP. You have to do that in the BFP announcement thread. You can announce a BFP within a thread in the TTC sections where appropriate though, like a due date club or as a followup on a question about certain supplements, techniques, etc. Also, threads about if you have a question about early symptoms and whether you could be pregnant are o.k. too. However, threads posting pictures of HPTs asking whether they are positive are not should go in the HPT/OPK section I believe.
> 
> I'm not sure, but I believe the main TTC forum is not as strict as say, the LTTC forum because it is supposed to be a TTC forum for everybody and the separate sections are for when you just want a group of women who are going through the same issues as you.Click to expand...

Thank you!


----------



## Fizzyfefe

BlondeShorty said:


> Ok I know you've vented since this about your dog.. :hugs: What kind of dog is she? .. Since she's a rescue I know that may be hard to answer, but what I mean is, is she going to be a bigger dog? small size, medium?
> 
> I had a dog that did a lot of what your'e talking about.. She loved being in her crate as long as we were home. It got to the point where I'd let her have free roam when I left the house and gave her treats and she was fine. This was after going through many a crate with her. There was even the day I finally bought a bunch of padlocks that I attached to the hinges on a metal crate and put the crate so it was facing a wall. .. Until she figured out how to rip the door off of it by throwing all 85lbs of her weight at it. :doh:
> 
> She also would growl at people when I walked her.. but was fine with DH. We finally discovered that she calmed down after a while with me but in the beginning the growling made me nervous and she picked up on this energy which made it worse. We also think she was trying to "protect" me. It took a lot of patience but eventually we got her out of the habit.. lots of treats were brought with me on walks to help this along.. I did have a muzzle on her in the beginning though some times I walked her if I knew there would be a lot of people around so that I felt better mentally and less nervous about her acting agressive. Near the end, I didn't have to use it at all..
> 
> Just wanted to share this and let you know it should get better with time. :hugs: Some dogs just have a harder time adjusting..
> As everyone else has said.. a behaviourist is an excellent idea in this situation.
> I hope it gets better for you. :thumbup:

Hi, Blondeshorty. :) My dog is practically the spawn of Satan :dohh:... she has only regressed since I originally posted that. She is a black lab mix; some people say she looks like part Pit, others say Boxer or Chow... And the vet didn't know. She's about 60 pounds right now, and the vet said she should stay this size.

Her training classes start tomorrow, thank goodness. They are going to help with commands, but I don't think they'll do anything for her behavior when we're not come. I wanted to buy a muzzle, but hubby is against it. I honestly think she's going to go crazy with all the people and other dogs, and won't be able to pay attention.

How did you train her to stop growling? I know you said you brought treats, but did you only give them to her when she didn't growl?

Thank you. I hope she does get better.


----------



## AlyCon

omg my sister is such a selfish little bitch!! once again i agreed to babysit for her FOR FREE and she turns around and is a complete ingrate towards me!! So before i get into the story let me say this, its hard for me to say no to her because im living with her right now while im waiting to be cleared to move to Germany where DH is- But its not even her house its my nieces paternal grandparents house and my sister lives with them- even though she and my nieces dad arent together but thats another story. Anyway, thats why i feel like i cant say no because i dont want to deal with the drama. heres the story:

Like i said i agreed to babysit for my sister while she goes to school. She said she got out at three so i agreed to do it because its only a few hours. but then this morning as shes getting ready to leave shes like "oh yea i have a meeting at six tonight.." and she didnt plan to come home in between which leaves me with the baby nonstop until at least eight oclock! and that pissed me off because my sister always does that, she gets me to agree to babysit and then all of a sudden she has a million things to do that day and I end up with her kid ALL DAY LONG. So she leaves and of course my niece is misbehaving, drawing in crayon all over the place driving me insane but luckily our other sister took us to the mall so i could at least get out of the house. So while im out she calls me to check on the baby and she tells me that after her meeting she has to meet up with a friend of hers to handle some business and im like WTF?? since when?? and she claims she told me about before but she didnt! so we get back from the mall and my niece refuses to eat her dinner then runs all around and wont lay down for bedtime and its already nine at night! So i finally get her to sleep so i shut the light off and closed the door. thats that. 

almost two hours later my sister finally comes home just before eleven, which is SEVEN HOURS LATER than she originally agreed to, and shes like "wheres my baby?" no hey how are you or thank you just wheres my baby. so i tell her i put her to sleep in her room. And she gets this major attitude with me saying why would i leave her in the room by herself. and im like i honestly dont see a problem!! shes 21 months, the bed is huge and she knows how to crawl down by herself. so she rolls her eyes and goes to her room. then she comes storming back like "then why is she on the floor??" umm maybe because she crawled down there!! Duh! If she fell i would have heard her and she definitely would've cried which i also wouldve heard. So i tell her "well shes still sleeping and hasnt cried so she must be fine." then my sister stomps back to her room and i hear her say "why is she naked, ughh.." and talking shit under her breath. Now we all know that if you can get a baby to go to sleep you are going to leave them be. I am not going to risk waking a sleeping baby to put PJs on them!! she had on her diaper and i put two blankets on her! 

Now for my vent:

What i dont understand is how are you gonna leave me with YOUR child all day long and then come home and complain about me?? You dont pay me or even say thank you but you can instantly point out everything i did "wrong?" oh really?? wow!! well how about this, if you want her to have a perfect day with perfectly balanced meals and perfect educational playtime and laying in the perfect position on the bed with the most perfect pair of pajamas on STAY HOME AND MAKE THAT SHIT HAPPEN YOURSELF!! dont put your responsibilities on me and then have the nerve to criticize the way i handled it! So what if shes naked on the floor! At least i spent TIME with her today! When you left this morning she had just woken up and when you crept in at eleven she was sleep, she didnt spend a lick of time with you today. I fed her, washed her, clothed her, played wither her, and most importantly told her i loved her! what the hell did you do for her today? oh i know, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! So stop pointing your finger at me and take a look in the goddamn mirror!


----------



## kassiaethne

to random people who keep decideing to tell me they think they are pregnant and not wanting the children...then offering to have the baby for ME to keep...

Why does everyone assume that because I want to adopt I am going to want to adopt THEIR mistakes. I want to adopt from brazil from a person who really needs to have a better chance in life...not you're stupid "I don't want a baby right now but I have a perfectly fine life" Do they think they are being helpful by offering me their mistakes? OH then they find out they are not pregnant and even offer to get knocked up FOR ME. REALLYYYYYY, You are freaking Bi Polar and your man has ADD and you think YOU are the perfect genetics I want for a baby? I don't even think you should be allowed to have childrens and should stop your shitty genetic line where it is...let alone wanna raise one of your spawn...How about you keep your legs closed and stop trying to offer to make a baby for me. It doesn't make me feel better about my own TTC issues and I DONT WANT YOUR BABIES. 

It isn't like shes the only one who has offered when they thought they might be pregnant, once people found out I am thinking of adopting early because I am having TTC issues and I just would like to have my child in my home and I planned on adopting my second child anyways....come flocking to me as soon as they "feel" like they are pregnant offering me their kids. It sickens me and makes me want to punch you in the face. And then when they find out a few days later they aren't pregnant they are all oh my bad sorry, I'd give you a baby if I could. I DON'T NEED YOUR BABIES I WANT MY OWN STOP THINKING YOU ARE DOING ME A FAVOR. You really THINK I want to hear about you all thinking you are pregnant and freaking out about how it is going to ruin your life? when I've been trying for 11 months now and nada....oh yes please tell me how a child is the most inconvenient thing in the world right now and how you are thinking of an abortion if I don't take it....I wish infertility on ALL OF YOU HOEBAGS for humanities sakes...

*slinks off to a corner and fume*


----------



## cntrygrl

AlyCon said:


> omg my sister is such a selfish little bitch!! once again i agreed to babysit for her FOR FREE and she turns around and is a complete ingrate towards me!! So before i get into the story let me say this, its hard for me to say no to her because im living with her right now while im waiting to be cleared to move to Germany where DH is- But its not even her house its my nieces paternal grandparents house and my sister lives with them- even though she and my nieces dad arent together but thats another story. Anyway, thats why i feel like i cant say no because i dont want to deal with the drama. heres the story:
> 
> Like i said i agreed to babysit for my sister while she goes to school. She said she got out at three so i agreed to do it because its only a few hours. but then this morning as shes getting ready to leave shes like "oh yea i have a meeting at six tonight.." and she didnt plan to come home in between which leaves me with the baby nonstop until at least eight oclock! and that pissed me off because my sister always does that, she gets me to agree to babysit and then all of a sudden she has a million things to do that day and I end up with her kid ALL DAY LONG. So she leaves and of course my niece is misbehaving, drawing in crayon all over the place driving me insane but luckily our other sister took us to the mall so i could at least get out of the house. So while im out she calls me to check on the baby and she tells me that after her meeting she has to meet up with a friend of hers to handle some business and im like WTF?? since when?? and she claims she told me about before but she didnt! so we get back from the mall and my niece refuses to eat her dinner then runs all around and wont lay down for bedtime and its already nine at night! So i finally get her to sleep so i shut the light off and closed the door. thats that.
> 
> almost two hours later my sister finally comes home just before eleven, which is SEVEN HOURS LATER than she originally agreed to, and shes like "wheres my baby?" no hey how are you or thank you just wheres my baby. so i tell her i put her to sleep in her room. And she gets this major attitude with me saying why would i leave her in the room by herself. and im like i honestly dont see a problem!! shes 21 months, the bed is huge and she knows how to crawl down by herself. so she rolls her eyes and goes to her room. then she comes storming back like "then why is she on the floor??" umm maybe because she crawled down there!! Duh! If she fell i would have heard her and she definitely would've cried which i also wouldve heard. So i tell her "well shes still sleeping and hasnt cried so she must be fine." then my sister stomps back to her room and i hear her say "why is she naked, ughh.." and talking shit under her breath. Now we all know that if you can get a baby to go to sleep you are going to leave them be. I am not going to risk waking a sleeping baby to put PJs on them!! she had on her diaper and i put two blankets on her!
> 
> Now for my vent:
> 
> What i dont understand is how are you gonna leave me with YOUR child all day long and then come home and complain about me?? You dont pay me or even say thank you but you can instantly point out everything i did "wrong?" oh really?? wow!! well how about this, if you want her to have a perfect day with perfectly balanced meals and perfect educational playtime and laying in the perfect position on the bed with the most perfect pair of pajamas on STAY HOME AND MAKE THAT SHIT HAPPEN YOURSELF!! dont put your responsibilities on me and then have the nerve to criticize the way i handled it! So what if shes naked on the floor! At least i spent TIME with her today! When you left this morning she had just woken up and when you crept in at eleven she was sleep, she didnt spend a lick of time with you today. I fed her, washed her, clothed her, played wither her, and most importantly told her i loved her! what the hell did you do for her today? oh i know, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! So stop pointing your finger at me and take a look in the goddamn mirror!

You really need to say something to your sister. When do you leave for Germany because she will be in for a big wake up call when you are gone.


----------



## tamithomas

Ugh, just got back from the hospital for my blood test for HCG to confirm my loss. While walking out I see a woman looking ready to pop and she's got an ice cappucino espresso (I can tell by the color) and a cigarette in her hands. Both were hers. Needless to say i used up all of the cars extra kleenex we keep in there on the way home while crying.


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## AlyCon

*cntrygrl*: I leave in about three weeks and yes shes in for a very rude awakening. My nieces dad gets her on weekends but he doesnt look after her any better than i do!! he puts her in another room with the kiddie gate up so he can play video games all day. And the other weekend when he had her he called my sister to come pick her up early so he could go out with his friends. So if she thinks hes going to agree to have her on tuesdays and thursdays as well then shes crazier than i thought. Like i said in my other post i dont mind doing it but it would be nice to just get a THANK YOU and not be treated like im incompetent! because if i was incompetent then shes a bad mom for leaving her child with me! ughh i could go on all day..


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## Bump2B

tamithomas said:


> Ugh, just got back from the hospital for my blood test for HCG to confirm my loss. While walking out I see a woman looking ready to pop and she's got an ice cappucino espresso (I can tell by the color) and a cigarette in her hands. Both were hers. Needless to say i used up all of the cars extra kleenex we keep in there on the way home while crying.

Ugh even if it was an accidental pregnancy, she's had 9 months to give up the nicotine and caffeine!


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## Sass827

I'm so sorry tami. It's really just not fair.


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## tamithomas

Weird part is, I wasn't crying due to the loss because I'm at a point where I'm comfortable with accepting what happened. I was crying due to how selfish the cow was being (sorry I just don't see her fit to being called a lady). Millions of women like us would kill to be in her shoes yet she decides to be selfish like that. So unfair.


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## babymabey

My vent of the day. My brothers wife (I refuse to call her my sister-in-law because she is a conniving bitch) just found out she is about 4 or 5 weeks pregnant and she already announced it on facebook, and told everyone that they are going to have to deal with her posting about it 24/7. I seriously wanted to reply with "thanks for the warning, I will be unsubscribing from your updates" I also had the thought of putting "fuck off" but thought that would be a little rude. What pisses me off is she knows me and my husband, who have been together 4x the time her and my brother have been together, have been TTC for almost 9 months. I know the facebook comment was to me because I told my brother to make sure she waits to post it in case anything happens, and I also told him if he would ask her to not post every little detail about the pregnancy because my family knows I am having a hard time conceiving.

Is it morally wrong to bitch slap a pregnant chick, even if she deserves it? Cause if I lived close to them I don't think I would have the strength not to knock her on her ass!


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## brightlywound

Does it count if I'm sick of myself? Lol. Ugh. I am a woman obsessed. Checking CM, CP, going over my charts constantly, reading all there is to read about supplements, ways to increase fertility, ways to lengthen your LP, symptoms of hypothyroidism (which I have become certain I have)... & Bless my husband's heart. We got into a dumb argument the other night & I stupidly said, "Yeah well. Trying to have another baby is probably a stupid idea anyway" (trying to imply I didn't want to carry any more of his spawn, lmao. Totally do-- I was just taking a stab at him). & He stopped arguing & said, "Why? Because you think you're having health issues with your thyroid babe? It's not a stupid idea. I really want this." Oy. Cut to me crying & blubbering apologies for being so awful. I'M A MESS. & I hate not having any friends to talk to about it. We aren't telling anyone we are TTC.


----------



## tamithomas

babymabey said:


> My vent of the day. My brothers wife (I refuse to call her my sister-in-law because she is a conniving bitch) just found out she is about 4 or 5 weeks pregnant and she already announced it on facebook, and told everyone that they are going to have to deal with her posting about it 24/7. I seriously wanted to reply with "thanks for the warning, I will be unsubscribing from your updates" I also had the thought of putting "fuck off" but thought that would be a little rude. What pisses me off is she knows me and my husband, who have been together 4x the time her and my brother have been together, have been TTC for almost 9 months. I know the facebook comment was to me because I told my brother to make sure she waits to post it in case anything happens, and I also told him if he would ask her to not post every little detail about the pregnancy because my family knows I am having a hard time conceiving.
> 
> Is it morally wrong to bitch slap a pregnant chick, even if she deserves it? Cause if I lived close to them I don't think I would have the strength not to knock her on her ass!

That is horrible for what your brothers wife did. Not only that but telling people to have to deal with posting about it 24/7? God I hate those types of pregnant women the most!!!!! She would totally deserve it.


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## tamithomas

Had a vent placed here that I felt wasn't needed after I posted it but dunno how to delete comments so posting this in its replacement instead.


----------



## BlondeShorty

Fizzyfefe said:


> BlondeShorty said:
> 
> 
> Ok I know you've vented since this about your dog.. :hugs: What kind of dog is she? .. Since she's a rescue I know that may be hard to answer, but what I mean is, is she going to be a bigger dog? small size, medium?
> 
> I had a dog that did a lot of what your'e talking about.. She loved being in her crate as long as we were home. It got to the point where I'd let her have free roam when I left the house and gave her treats and she was fine. This was after going through many a crate with her. There was even the day I finally bought a bunch of padlocks that I attached to the hinges on a metal crate and put the crate so it was facing a wall. .. Until she figured out how to rip the door off of it by throwing all 85lbs of her weight at it. :doh:
> 
> She also would growl at people when I walked her.. but was fine with DH. We finally discovered that she calmed down after a while with me but in the beginning the growling made me nervous and she picked up on this energy which made it worse. We also think she was trying to "protect" me. It took a lot of patience but eventually we got her out of the habit.. lots of treats were brought with me on walks to help this along.. I did have a muzzle on her in the beginning though some times I walked her if I knew there would be a lot of people around so that I felt better mentally and less nervous about her acting agressive. Near the end, I didn't have to use it at all..
> 
> Just wanted to share this and let you know it should get better with time. :hugs: Some dogs just have a harder time adjusting..
> As everyone else has said.. a behaviourist is an excellent idea in this situation.
> I hope it gets better for you. :thumbup:
> 
> Hi, Blondeshorty. :) My dog is practically the spawn of Satan :dohh:... she has only regressed since I originally posted that. She is a black lab mix; some people say she looks like part Pit, others say Boxer or Chow... And the vet didn't know. She's about 60 pounds right now, and the vet said she should stay this size.
> 
> Her training classes start tomorrow, thank goodness. They are going to help with commands, but I don't think they'll do anything for her behavior when we're not come. I wanted to buy a muzzle, but hubby is against it. I honestly think she's going to go crazy with all the people and other dogs, and won't be able to pay attention.
> 
> How did you train her to stop growling? I know you said you brought treats, but did you only give them to her when she didn't growl?
> 
> Thank you. I hope she does get better.Click to expand...

Hey sorry for the late reply, haven't really been online the last few days.
What we did with her was when I walked her, I was very strict with her.. Made her sit when we were to cross the street or any time I stopped and I'd give her a treat. She was allowed to get up and walk again when I told her "ok". I also made sure I was consistent at home and kept routine with her. (not allowed her food until told ok, had about 20 mins or so each night where we'd go through commands like sit, wait, etc. just to keep her engaged, then we'd play)

When people came by, I'd make her sit or lie down and try to distract her by trying to get her to give me a paw, etc. People usually figured out right away that she was nervous so wouldn't bother us and I'd give her treats for listening to me. .. Other times if she started growling or freaking out I'd take a treat out and hold it in front of her face or me and get her to focus on me and not what was freaking her out. Once she did.. I'd give her the treat. What I was basically trying to do was get her to see a situation she thought of as negative in a positive light. She started associating treats with other people and dogs. It took a lot of work and a lot of frustration. The payoff was worth it though.

I'm not a fan of muzzles normally but found it helped me feel better about walking her. When I had it on I wasn't worried about her trying to go at another dog, etc. because she wouldn't be able to through the muzzle. As I felt more confident, she wasn't able to pick up on any anxiety from me so would become easier to walk. Then as I became confident that I could control her enough, I started using the muzzle less and less with success.

DH was against a muzzle as well because he never seemed to have a problem walking her. If she got upset, he could just pull on the leash a bit and tell her enough and that was it. He's also a foot taller than me and has about 35 extra lbs on him which may have had something to do with it as well :haha:
.. I think it was that she wanted to protect me and she could sense my unease when we walked by other people and dogs so she would feed off of it and then add to it that she was scared herself. (she was attacked as a little puppy by a bigger dog and wasn't socialized as much as she should have been which didn't help either.. so some of her reactions were purely fear based)

I also had the muzzle and started using it when he wasn't around so he didn't even know I had it on her and by the time he did, he realized it was helping me out quite a bit.. :haha:

Mainly we just kept being consistent.. it was hard, but it eventually paid off. 

How did the training classes go by the way? Having her around other dogs and people might be good as it'll help her socialize and get used to being around other people and dogs. She may learn how to be better at ignoring them and focusing only on you. .. Maybe ask the trainer at her class about some of your concerns and see if they have any insight as well.

If you have any questions, feel free to send me a private message, I'd be more than happy to lend you an ear and some support with this as I know how frustrating it can be.. 

:hugs:


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## BlondeShorty

Dear body and brain

Yes you had a 4 hour nap today early in the morning. This does not mean that you've had enough sleep. You are supposed to be meeting a friend for breakfast in 5 hours from now. Having _some_ sleep before then would probably be a good idea. Especially since you want to accomplish a few other things while in town, so your visit may turn into a full day in the city. It would be nice if you were awake enough to be able to actually remember all the things you want to accomplish this time. You were in town two days ago and forgot half the stuff you needed to bring to finish up a few pesky chores. :dohh:


----------



## thisisme

i have a few rants!!

im annoyed at myself as i am doing it again, i went onb the pill for 5 months to help sort my hormones, as soon as i came off i am convinced i ovulated, i am now 8 DPO and am convinced that since 4DPO i have had sore boobs, peeing lots etc its the only thing i think about im convinced im PG but i know that the tests will tell otherwise.

im sick of those people who complain that they have 4 kids under 5 its such hard work, well you shoulda kept your legs shut. those people who have get PG 4 months after having a baby and then go on to comlain about it.

(sorry these might offend some but for others they may understand)

being told by those TTC#1 that we will never understand, we have children we should just be grateful for that. well im sorry but those urges and pain you feel for having your 1st we also have that, it hurts us the same way, the urges are still the same. i do appreciate how it feels TTC#1 as i have been there but i never once told people they should be grateful for already having their children. TTC is hard for everyone. we shouldnt judge each other just because they already have babies or dont have babies.

the other think thats been bugging me recently (a friend who had been TTC#4 , who is now pregnant did this lol) its so hard it hurts every month we get a BFN and theyve been trying 6 months, even doctors say that on average it will take a woman a year to conceive so yes its hard when you keep getting a BFN but 6 months isnt that long. we've been trying 3.5 years and i know others have been trying even longer than that, sometimes 10 -15 years. thats when it gets hard. and too be fair the majority of the 6 monthers may well be pregnant in another month or 2 thos trying much longer have a much slimmer chance.
im sorry for that rant but it does hurt everyone regardless to if its 6 months, 6 years etc


----------



## Fizzyfefe

BlondeShorty said:


> Hey sorry for the late reply, haven't really been online the last few days.
> What we did with her was when I walked her, I was very strict with her.. Made her sit when we were to cross the street or any time I stopped and I'd give her a treat. She was allowed to get up and walk again when I told her "ok". I also made sure I was consistent at home and kept routine with her. (not allowed her food until told ok, had about 20 mins or so each night where we'd go through commands like sit, wait, etc. just to keep her engaged, then we'd play)
> 
> When people came by, I'd make her sit or lie down and try to distract her by trying to get her to give me a paw, etc. People usually figured out right away that she was nervous so wouldn't bother us and I'd give her treats for listening to me. .. Other times if she started growling or freaking out I'd take a treat out and hold it in front of her face or me and get her to focus on me and not what was freaking her out. Once she did.. I'd give her the treat. What I was basically trying to do was get her to see a situation she thought of as negative in a positive light. She started associating treats with other people and dogs. It took a lot of work and a lot of frustration. The payoff was worth it though.
> 
> I'm not a fan of muzzles normally but found it helped me feel better about walking her. When I had it on I wasn't worried about her trying to go at another dog, etc. because she wouldn't be able to through the muzzle. As I felt more confident, she wasn't able to pick up on any anxiety from me so would become easier to walk. Then as I became confident that I could control her enough, I started using the muzzle less and less with success.
> 
> DH was against a muzzle as well because he never seemed to have a problem walking her. If she got upset, he could just pull on the leash a bit and tell her enough and that was it. He's also a foot taller than me and has about 35 extra lbs on him which may have had something to do with it as well :haha:
> .. I think it was that she wanted to protect me and she could sense my unease when we walked by other people and dogs so she would feed off of it and then add to it that she was scared herself. (she was attacked as a little puppy by a bigger dog and wasn't socialized as much as she should have been which didn't help either.. so some of her reactions were purely fear based)
> 
> I also had the muzzle and started using it when he wasn't around so he didn't even know I had it on her and by the time he did, he realized it was helping me out quite a bit.. :haha:
> 
> Mainly we just kept being consistent.. it was hard, but it eventually paid off.
> 
> How did the training classes go by the way? Having her around other dogs and people might be good as it'll help her socialize and get used to being around other people and dogs. She may learn how to be better at ignoring them and focusing only on you. .. Maybe ask the trainer at her class about some of your concerns and see if they have any insight as well.
> 
> If you have any questions, feel free to send me a private message, I'd be more than happy to lend you an ear and some support with this as I know how frustrating it can be..
> 
> :hugs:

The crazy thing is that whenever I tell her to sit, she only does it for a few seconds at a time, and she will only sit in the house. She absolutely refuses to sit anywhere else in public, outside, or even in other people's homes. I don't know if she gets over-stimulated or distracted, or a combination of both.

However, this training class last night helped immensely (or so it seemed), so I will be working with her often to see if I can change her behavior. She is food-motivated and did very well with the trainer having her sit and not growl at the other dog in the class.

The trainer suggested this thing called Sentry Stop That!, which is a spray can with pheromones in it. Whenever she has a bad behavior, I have spray it about 12 inches way from her face. The loud noise scares her enough to make her stop, and the pheromones help her to calm down. That's what the trainer used to get her to stop growling at the other dog, and it worked immediately.

She also suggested getting this plug-in thing when pheromones, and it apparently creates a calming effect so they don't go haywire in their crate when left alone. It was really expensive, though, so we'll see how this Stop That! thing works first. She said to put her in the crate, step outside and pretend that we are leaving, and as soon as she starts to chew at the crate to run in and spray it.

According to the trainer, the dogs are always looking for a pack leader, or are the pack leader themselves, and it seems in our situations that both our dogs view our men as the leader. The trainer said that's fine, but she needs to realize that she is still "lower in the pack" than me, and she still needs to listen. She said women are usually the "mothering type" and are the ones that are more lenient. I do not allow her to jump on the furniture, to jump on people, to bite when we are playing, etc., and the trainer seemed shocked when I told her that I was more firm and give more discipline than my hubby.

The other girl in the class with us actually lives in the same apartment complex, but when I asked her if we could socialize our dogs together, she didn't seem keen on the idea. She didn't come right out and say no, but I could just tell she didn't want to, you know? I was disappointed, as it would have been very easy to socialize her with another person and dog since they live so close.

We definitely learned a lot last night. I feel like I might have more control over this situation now, but only time will tell. I have to keep reminding myself to have patience with her because of her puppy mindset. I keep telling myself that this is good training for a child.

Holy crap, I wrote a novel. Sorry. ;)


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## J_Lynn

Dear DH's ex-wife, 

If you were on fire, and I had to pee - I'd hold it. 

Love, 

Me.


----------



## babymabey

thisisme said:


> i have a few rants!!
> 
> im annoyed at myself as i am doing it again, i went onb the pill for 5 months to help sort my hormones, as soon as i came off i am convinced i ovulated, i am now 8 DPO and am convinced that since 4DPO i have had sore boobs, peeing lots etc its the only thing i think about im convinced im PG but i know that the tests will tell otherwise.
> 
> im sick of those people who complain that they have 4 kids under 5 its such hard work, well you shoulda kept your legs shut. those people who have get PG 4 months after having a baby and then go on to comlain about it.
> 
> (sorry these might offend some but for others they may understand)
> 
> being told by those TTC#1 that we will never understand, we have children we should just be grateful for that. well im sorry but those urges and pain you feel for having your 1st we also have that, it hurts us the same way, the urges are still the same. i do appreciate how it feels TTC#1 as i have been there but i never once told people they should be grateful for already having their children. TTC is hard for everyone. we shouldnt judge each other just because they already have babies or dont have babies.
> 
> the other think thats been bugging me recently (a friend who had been TTC#4 , who is now pregnant did this lol) its so hard it hurts every month we get a BFN and theyve been trying 6 months, even doctors say that on average it will take a woman a year to conceive so yes its hard when you keep getting a BFN but 6 months isnt that long. we've been trying 3.5 years and i know others have been trying even longer than that, sometimes 10 -15 years. thats when it gets hard. and too be fair the majority of the 6 monthers may well be pregnant in another month or 2 thos trying much longer have a much slimmer chance.
> im sorry for that rant but it does hurt everyone regardless to if its 6 months, 6 years etc

I cannot believe people are actually telling you those things. That is horrible. I remember my sister in law getting very baby hungry after having my nephew and she told me it actually gets worse after having one because you can't wait to feel that again. Unfortunately this sister in law was married to my whore of a brother who cheated on her (while they were TTC # 2) and then left her for his new wife. The one who graciously told me that she is pregnant and I will be forced to deal with her every little update on Facebook. That witch got pregnant "accidentally" or as I like to refer to it "on purpose" to get her hands on my brothers money when he finally realizes shes a psycho and divorces her and he'll have to pay child support.

My poor sister in law (she is still my sister, even if they are divorced) was desperate for another baby, and now she is forced to be civil to the witch who intentionally broke up their marriage because not only is that witch my nephews new step mom, and has to deal with the fact that it is her who should be pregnant, not some home wrecker! 

I agree we come on these forums to speak openly and not be judged, and it is not right that you are being judged by certain women. I know from my sister in law, being baby hungry is worse after having a child, or children, than it would be for TTC #1 because you already know what it feels like, and you can't wait to feel it again.

Good luck to all the ladies who are TTC this month!! Baby dust to all
:dust::dust:


----------



## brightlywound

> being baby hungry is worse after having a child, or children, than it would be for TTC #1 because you already know what it feels like, and you can't wait to feel it again.

God, this is so true.


----------



## 4magpies

brightlywound said:


> being baby hungry is worse after having a child, or children, than it would be for TTC #1 because you already know what it feels like, and you can't wait to feel it again.
> 
> God, this is so true.Click to expand...

I'm sorry but this is as bad a people saying you don't need another child because you already have one. 

I'm actually really offended, I'm TTC #1 does this mean I don't want a baby as bad as you? No. 

:(


----------



## zoomlentil

Fizzyfefe said:


> BlondeShorty said:
> 
> 
> Hey sorry for the late reply, haven't really been online the last few days.
> What we did with her was when I walked her, I was very strict with her.. Made her sit when we were to cross the street or any time I stopped and I'd give her a treat. She was allowed to get up and walk again when I told her "ok". I also made sure I was consistent at home and kept routine with her. (not allowed her food until told ok, had about 20 mins or so each night where we'd go through commands like sit, wait, etc. just to keep her engaged, then we'd play)
> 
> When people came by, I'd make her sit or lie down and try to distract her by trying to get her to give me a paw, etc. People usually figured out right away that she was nervous so wouldn't bother us and I'd give her treats for listening to me. .. Other times if she started growling or freaking out I'd take a treat out and hold it in front of her face or me and get her to focus on me and not what was freaking her out. Once she did.. I'd give her the treat. What I was basically trying to do was get her to see a situation she thought of as negative in a positive light. She started associating treats with other people and dogs. It took a lot of work and a lot of frustration. The payoff was worth it though.
> 
> I'm not a fan of muzzles normally but found it helped me feel better about walking her. When I had it on I wasn't worried about her trying to go at another dog, etc. because she wouldn't be able to through the muzzle. As I felt more confident, she wasn't able to pick up on any anxiety from me so would become easier to walk. Then as I became confident that I could control her enough, I started using the muzzle less and less with success.
> 
> DH was against a muzzle as well because he never seemed to have a problem walking her. If she got upset, he could just pull on the leash a bit and tell her enough and that was it. He's also a foot taller than me and has about 35 extra lbs on him which may have had something to do with it as well :haha:
> .. I think it was that she wanted to protect me and she could sense my unease when we walked by other people and dogs so she would feed off of it and then add to it that she was scared herself. (she was attacked as a little puppy by a bigger dog and wasn't socialized as much as she should have been which didn't help either.. so some of her reactions were purely fear based)
> 
> I also had the muzzle and started using it when he wasn't around so he didn't even know I had it on her and by the time he did, he realized it was helping me out quite a bit.. :haha:
> 
> Mainly we just kept being consistent.. it was hard, but it eventually paid off.
> 
> How did the training classes go by the way? Having her around other dogs and people might be good as it'll help her socialize and get used to being around other people and dogs. She may learn how to be better at ignoring them and focusing only on you. .. Maybe ask the trainer at her class about some of your concerns and see if they have any insight as well.
> 
> If you have any questions, feel free to send me a private message, I'd be more than happy to lend you an ear and some support with this as I know how frustrating it can be..
> 
> :hugs:
> 
> The crazy thing is that whenever I tell her to sit, she only does it for a few seconds at a time, and she will only sit in the house. She absolutely refuses to sit anywhere else in public, outside, or even in other people's homes. I don't know if she gets over-stimulated or distracted, or a combination of both.
> 
> However, this training class last night helped immensely (or so it seemed), so I will be working with her often to see if I can change her behavior. She is food-motivated and did very well with the trainer having her sit and not growl at the other dog in the class.
> 
> The trainer suggested this thing called Sentry Stop That!, which is a spray can with pheromones in it. Whenever she has a bad behavior, I have spray it about 12 inches way from her face. The loud noise scares her enough to make her stop, and the pheromones help her to calm down. That's what the trainer used to get her to stop growling at the other dog, and it worked immediately.
> 
> She also suggested getting this plug-in thing when pheromones, and it apparently creates a calming effect so they don't go haywire in their crate when left alone. It was really expensive, though, so we'll see how this Stop That! thing works first. She said to put her in the crate, step outside and pretend that we are leaving, and as soon as she starts to chew at the crate to run in and spray it.
> 
> According to the trainer, the dogs are always looking for a pack leader, or are the pack leader themselves, and it seems in our situations that both our dogs view our men as the leader. The trainer said that's fine, but she needs to realize that she is still "lower in the pack" than me, and she still needs to listen. She said women are usually the "mothering type" and are the ones that are more lenient. I do not allow her to jump on the furniture, to jump on people, to bite when we are playing, etc., and the trainer seemed shocked when I told her that I was more firm and give more discipline than my hubby.
> 
> The other girl in the class with us actually lives in the same apartment complex, but when I asked her if we could socialize our dogs together, she didn't seem keen on the idea. She didn't come right out and say no, but I could just tell she didn't want to, you know? I was disappointed, as it would have been very easy to socialize her with another person and dog since they live so close.
> 
> We definitely learned a lot last night. I feel like I might have more control over this situation now, but only time will tell. I have to keep reminding myself to have patience with her because of her puppy mindset. I keep telling myself that this is good training for a child.
> 
> Holy crap, I wrote a novel. Sorry. ;)Click to expand...

Fizzy, training classes are a great start and I'm glad things have improved, but from what you've said she has some deep-rooted problems that really need to be seen to by a canine behaviourist. As for the person who wasn't keen on socialising their dog with yours, that's a pretty normal response to someone who has a dog-aggressive dog - they have to look out for their own.

This is an Australian site, but it really is one of the best, and has many very experienced dog people, trainers and behaviourists on it. Sign up and ask your questions in the training section, hopefully you'll get some help.

www.dolforums.com.au

Also just keep in mind as on any forum, there are people on there who can be blunt about things- try not to get offended if this happens because the wealth of info available there far outweighs any other stuff. :)


----------



## tamithomas

brightlywound said:


> being baby hungry is worse after having a child, or children, than it would be for TTC #1 because you already know what it feels like, and you can't wait to feel it again.
> 
> God, this is so true.Click to expand...

Not sure how I feel about this remark. On one hand, I see your pov but on the other hand, us on our #1 have not even been able to taste what it's like to even be parents yet so already those on #2 have the advantage on that hand. Not down grading TTC #2's, it hurts just as bad as those who haven't conceived yet but to throw the notion that it's worse is a bit far fetched IMHO. But we all have a right to our opinion and I respect yours. No harm intended.


----------



## tamithomas

Vent non TTC related: Dear town I live in, stop being a bunch of alcoholics. Talking about how drinking is cool when you're 25+ is as immature as one gets. Give the liquid up already, it's not worth the heavy drowning in the long run.


----------



## 4magpies

And without trying to sound harsh. Unless you LTTTC #1 you don't know how it feels because you haven't been there. 

Just as I don't know how hard it is to go through secondary infertility. 

Wanting a baby is wanting a baby.


----------



## jojolabobo

4magpies said:


> And without trying to sound harsh. Unless you LTTTC #1 you don't know how it feels because you haven't been there.
> 
> Just as I don't know how hard it is to go through secondary infertility.
> 
> Wanting a baby is wanting a baby.

Very True

xx


----------



## CaptainMummy

im ttc #2... And i think its different to ttc your first, but not in the sense that i wanted one more than the other.

i think when ttc #2, it is slightly easier becasue i have a little monkey who is keepibg me busy, so u cant constantly think about ttc, wheras ttc#1 i had all the time in the world to think about it, which means it made time drag in!

It doesnt mean i wanted the first more than i want another one.. Its just different =D


----------



## laurac1988

WIsh people would stop being so judgemental. "Oh... you're going to NYC this year and Florida in Feb? Where do you get your money? I wish i had that money just LYING around"

You think our money is just lying around?!?! No! We SAVE UP. We don't go out on the piss four nights a week. We don't buy random shit. We like holidays... and we both work damn hard for our money. 

get your nose out


----------



## Tasha

:hugs: girls. We all want the same thing in the end, whether you have no earth babies, or ten, no angels or 15. The longing, the aching, it isnt measureable, we only know our own ache. I just hope we all get there.


----------



## wellsk

Beautifully put Tasha :hugs:


----------



## CaliDreaming

laurac1988 said:


> WIsh people would stop being so judgemental. "Oh... you're going to NYC this year and Florida in Feb? Where do you get your money? I wish i had that money just LYING around"
> 
> You think our money is just lying around?!?! No! We SAVE UP. We don't go out on the piss four nights a week. We don't buy random shit. We like holidays... and we both work damn hard for our money.
> 
> get your nose out

Oooh, I hate people who "count other people's money". They are just jealous.



MrsMurphy2Be said:


> im ttc #2... And i think its different to ttc your first, but not in the sense that i wanted one more than the other.
> 
> i think when ttc #2, it is slightly easier becasue i have a little monkey who is keepibg me busy, so u cant constantly think about ttc, wheras ttc#1 i had all the time in the world to think about it, which means it made time drag in!
> 
> It doesnt mean i wanted the first more than i want another one.. Its just different =D

Yeah "different" is the best word for it, because it's hard to quantify how much someone wants something. I also think that different women are going to feel differently about it depending on their circumstances. Some may be fine with whatever God sends their way, while others might have their heart set on more than one.

I had a hard time conceiving my first, and back then I thought conceiving a second wouldn't be as stressful since I'd already have one, but I have had a rude awakening on that. 

I think if I had to be honest, I think I'd have to say that I wanted #1 more intensely in the sense that I am not willing to go as far to get #2 as #1. I don't see myself feeling good about paying thousands for IVF or going into debt to conceive #2 whereas I absolutely would have done so to conceive #1.

However, that being said, I am having a much harder time coping with my infertility this time around. It totally took me off guard and seems so counterintuitive, but for me it's been true. The things I used to do to cope when I conceive dd I can't do now. 

I used to be able to take time out for myself just to cry or be alone with my thoughts, but now that I'm busy with dd, I can't do that when I need to. I don't want to be crying in front of dd, I don't have time to cry at work, and then with the little time I have with dh, I don't want to spend it crying. So I have a lot of grief. 

Another thing that's harder is worrying about dd and if she'll be okay being an only child. I was an only for 10 years, but I was a very quiet introverted child. Dd is very outgoing and I think she really needs a sibling. I just hate thinking about her having to play by herself as she grows up.

The other thing that's hard for me is that I don't feel like I pull out all the stops trying like I did for #1. If I find that there is some problem that needs a lot of money or a lot of time to fix, then that will have to be the end of trying for me. I hate that I don't have as much flexibility as I did before.


----------



## babydevil1989

just either give me my AF or a BFP! being in limbo causes me so much stress!!!!!!! bloody body of mine!!


----------



## cntrygrl

CaliDreaming said:


> laurac1988 said:
> 
> 
> WIsh people would stop being so judgemental. "Oh... you're going to NYC this year and Florida in Feb? Where do you get your money? I wish i had that money just LYING around"
> 
> You think our money is just lying around?!?! No! We SAVE UP. We don't go out on the piss four nights a week. We don't buy random shit. We like holidays... and we both work damn hard for our money.
> 
> get your nose out
> 
> Oooh, I hate people who "count other people's money". They are just jealous.
> 
> 
> 
> MrsMurphy2Be said:
> 
> 
> im ttc #2... And i think its different to ttc your first, but not in the sense that i wanted one more than the other.
> 
> i think when ttc #2, it is slightly easier becasue i have a little monkey who is keepibg me busy, so u cant constantly think about ttc, wheras ttc#1 i had all the time in the world to think about it, which means it made time drag in!
> 
> It doesnt mean i wanted the first more than i want another one.. Its just different =DClick to expand...
> 
> Yeah "different" is the best word for it, because it's hard to quantify how much someone wants something. I also think that different women are going to feel differently about it depending on their circumstances. Some may be fine with whatever God sends their way, while others might have their heart set on more than one.
> 
> I had a hard time conceiving my first, and back then I thought conceiving a second wouldn't be as stressful since I'd already have one, but I have had a rude awakening on that.
> 
> I think if I had to be honest, I think I'd have to say that I wanted #1 more intensely in the sense that I am not willing to go as far to get #2 as #1. I don't see myself feeling good about paying thousands for IVF or going into debt to conceive #2 whereas I absolutely would have done so to conceive #1.
> 
> However, that being said, I am having a much harder time coping with my infertility this time around. It totally took me off guard and seems so counterintuitive, but for me it's been true. The things I used to do to cope when I conceive dd I can't do now.
> 
> I used to be able to take time out for myself just to cry or be alone with my thoughts, but now that I'm busy with dd, I can't do that when I need to. I don't want to be crying in front of dd, I don't have time to cry at work, and then with the little time I have with dh, I don't want to spend it crying. So I have a lot of grief.
> 
> Another thing that's harder is worrying about dd and if she'll be okay being an only child. I was an only for 10 years, but I was a very quiet introverted child. Dd is very outgoing and I think she really needs a sibling. I just hate thinking about her having to play by herself as she grows up.
> 
> The other thing that's hard for me is that I don't feel like I pull out all the stops trying like I did for #1. If I find that there is some problem that needs a lot of money or a lot of time to fix, then that will have to be the end of trying for me. I hate that I don't have as much flexibility as I did before.Click to expand...

If it comes down to it I wouldn't be too worried about DD being an only child. Since she is outgoing she will have no problems making friends if you socialize her in groups or even once school time comes. Best of luck to you on TTC #2.


----------



## kpk

ChartsNHearts said:


> laurac1988 said:
> 
> 
> Oh... I'm trying for a baby. When I talk to you about this, the last thing I want to hear is "I didn't even have to try. It just happened"! ARGH!
> 
> This made me laugh! My closest friend is the only person I've told that we're TTC and she replied with "Well, I wouldn't know anything about it, because we got pregnant on our first try"! (Not their first month - their one and only 'attempt'!!)
> 
> It certainly shut me up & I'm definitely not in a hurry to pour my heart out to anyone else after that! :laugh2:Click to expand...

HA! YES! My sister-in-law to-be got knocked up after missing two pills and basically being my husband's brother's booty-call for about a month. She keeps telling us to have a baby (we haven't told anyone we're trying, so we can avoid all the uh...'helpful' advice) I want to punch her in the face.


----------



## HopefulCookie

OMG I have been in such a baaaaaad mood. Before my boss left for her 5 week holiday, I had a MC and didn't tell her anything about the preg or mc. She's not married or has kids yet thinks she knows everything. She's a know it all and wants to be in your business and expects you to tell her your business. When you tell her anything about your life. She'll analyze it and tell you everything wrong with you and what you're doing wrong. And that you should listen to her advice and do it that way. Gah! Continuing...Due to the bleeding and cramping I ended up leaving for home from work two hours early a two days in a row. She b*tchingly tells me that I get sick too often and that I should try to be more professional and get help. And I should feel soooo lucky to have her since she is the only one who'd be willing to accommodate me and had it been someone else why would have not.

She came back yesterday from her vacation. She comes to work directly from the airport. *WHO in their right mind does that!!!* I wasn't in the office since I had a midday appointment with gyna, referred to me by my SIL since my own doesn't listen to me about pains I've been having. The place was packed with patients. It took forever to get to the place and back since it was so far and cuz of traffic. So couldn't go to work as I had planned. I did inform them. 

Anywho my boss decides to call me and ask where the hell I am and my mother picks up. I was so exhausted I was napping - sad but true. And in a sarcastic tone asks my mom what's wrong with her now. My mom already knows about how my boss patronizes me so my mom snapped and said she had to go to the Doctor because she's been having some pains since her MC. OMG my boss flipped and was like WHY DIDN'T SHE TELL ME. oh I would have done this, and that. I would have given her time off. (She some months ago lectured me not to have kids anytime soon and if I accidentally do that I should have a back up plan about getting new work. WTF??) Today she calls up at work today and snaps at me WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME. blah blah. Honestly its not her business. She wasn't going to be supportive. She was going to make me feel shitty like she always does. GAAAAAHH


----------



## Fizzyfefe

HopefulCookie said:


> She some months ago lectured me not to have kids anytime soon and if I accidentally do that I should have a back up plan about getting new work. WTF??

Whoa! I can't believe you have a boss like that! How awful. I thought you had maternity leave, and your boss can't terminate you because you are pregnant or because of your family status?!

I'm sorry about your miscarriage. :hugs:


----------



## babymabey

laurac1988 said:


> WIsh people would stop being so judgemental. "Oh... you're going to NYC this year and Florida in Feb? Where do you get your money? I wish i had that money just LYING around"
> 
> You think our money is just lying around?!?! No! We SAVE UP. We don't go out on the piss four nights a week. We don't buy random shit. We like holidays... and we both work damn hard for our money.
> 
> get your nose out

I completely agree. I get this from people in my family the most. My husband and I have been saving as much as possible since Feb (when, after 8 years together, we finally got married) so we could go on a late honeymoon/vacation to Hawaii. We leave in about a month, and we get to be there a week. Every time I say something about it, about being excited, to my mother so always says something like "I wish I could take a vacation, hell I wish I had an extra penny to my name" it always makes me feel like crap.


----------



## HopefulCookie

Fizzyfefe said:


> HopefulCookie said:
> 
> 
> She some months ago lectured me not to have kids anytime soon and if I accidentally do that I should have a back up plan about getting new work. WTF??
> 
> Whoa! I can't believe you have a boss like that! How awful. I thought you had maternity leave, and your boss can't terminate you because you are pregnant or because of your family status?!
> 
> I'm sorry about your miscarriage. :hugs:Click to expand...

Thank you so much. :hugs: I'm emotionally so much better since the MC. I happened June 30th and it was my first preg. I was devastated but am hopeful once again. Sometimes I get these strong sharp stabbing pains on my left ovary and I get freaked because I don't know what's happening. gyna thinks nothing of it.

My boss thinks I'm a whining child. =_=


----------



## Stake

Dear Boss,
I can't come to work today. Im staying in bed and doing the dirty for the next 8 days straight. count that as my vacation time for this year.


----------



## nic18

Stake said:


> Dear Boss,
> I can't come to work today. Im staying in bed and doing the dirty for the next 8 days straight. count that as my vacation time for this year.

hahahaha, this made me giggle!


----------



## kassiaethne

Rant: Itouch why are you so fragile *cries over her cracked screen*


----------



## nic18

too all the stupid 13-15 year olds going about the streets drinking please shut up! your doing my head in. going get drunk and lie in a gutter somewhere else! go and drink somewhere else!!


----------



## nic18

2nd vent of the night!!

just been sitting thinking about this!

to my dearest best friend :).. you 8month old baby is cute and i adore him ALOT! but you fell pregnant with him not knowing who the dad is cause you slept around with your ex boyfriend & his best friend, now you find out you are pregnant with a guy you were just 'seeing' by accident because you were to stupid to get contraception! i know you miscarried at the weekend and i truley sorry because i know how horrible it must be for you. but how do people like you who just sleep about and fuck guys about just fall pregnant? yet there are hundreds of women out there with OH and DH who do everything right but yet cant? YOU ANNOY ME BEST FRIEND! focus on your child you have, the last thing you need right now is another baby! your not stable enough to bring up a child and you have no income or anything! please just keep your legs shut.


----------



## tamithomas

Dear life, not to play the worlds smallest violin but after everything I've been through since childhood up until now, would be too much to ask to at least just win the lottery so I can buy my dream house at the lake? :blush: :haha:


----------



## kassiaethne

good god party next door stop already your music has been shaking my appartment since 8pm and it is already 2am


----------



## tamithomas

Warning:TMI.....Dear O, I'm fully aware of your presence that I'm in my fertile window. Please let me keep one pair of undies clean, the CM overload is annoying especially when DH and I can't do anything about it as he's not physically able to BD this month. I would hate to have to resort to panty liners as I'm one of those few women who feels more comfortable in thongs than actual undies lol.


----------



## 4magpies

Stop toying with me mr temperature. 

Make your bloody mind up.


----------



## CaptainMummy

Rant about myself... Stop giving into temptation when you see cakes and chocolate in the shop! 

Omg i am so annoyed at myself but i just cant help it!


----------



## tsyhanochka

My sister was really happy to hear we eloped. She said now we can ttc and I'll get pregnant really fast like her....each time she wanted to get pregnant it happened that cycle. She doesn't have any idea we are already in cycle 10. She means well but thankfully I don't talk to her that much on the phone.


----------



## Fizzyfefe

Why do people feel the need to question why I don't want an alcoholic beverage? Mind your own freaking business!


----------



## tamithomas

Fizzyfefe: story of my life right there. 3 years sober in a town where there's a bar at every corner lol


----------



## tamithomas

t-minus between now and two weeks until my "friend" gives birth. Almost tempted to cave and take the anxiety pills that my doctor prescribed but I'm not due to personal feelings towards those types of pills. Was supposed to be 6 weeks along.


----------



## J_Lynn

My body can go f*ck itself. I am 2 weeks post-AF, and I have serious increased CM and a very slight cramping in my left ovary just every once in a while. I think it's rude that my body is making me think there's a chance I'd get a BFP, when I know this will be the same as every month before. I hate getting excited for nothing. 

Now, I'm just waiting for my period to start because I know it will be happening sometime soon :(


----------



## tsyhanochka

Vent to my sister that is staying with us: get a job and move out already. You being here is stressing me out...and your mentioning "when you two have kids" or "when you pee on a stick" is driving me insane. Regardless of how many times you are told kids won't happen for awhile you keep bringing it up. I'm so very glad I didn't tell you we are ttc.
This stress can not be good for me. Cycle 10 for us and I want to start using opks but I don't want her finding them. I want her to mind her own damn business!
I regret ever agreeing to let her stay here.
Grrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaah

Well, now I feel better.


----------



## kassiaethne

haosdihaodihao (face banging on keys) I went to 3 different pharmacies in my neighborhood and asked for prenatal vitamins and they all said "oh we don't do that, or we don't support those....what the deuce you are a pharmacy you are suppose to have this stuff!!!! in the USA they have em on the shelves and you don't even HAVE TO ASK. in mexico....oh fuck your baby wanting self no vitamins for you...here have a Oxycontin without a prescription


----------



## tamithomas

kassiaethne said:


> haosdihaodihao (face banging on keys) I went to 3 different pharmacies in my neighborhood and asked for prenatal vitamins and they all said "oh we don't do that, or we don't support those....what the deuce you are a pharmacy you are suppose to have this stuff!!!! in the USA they have em on the shelves and you don't even HAVE TO ASK. in mexico....oh fuck your baby wanting self no vitamins for you...here have a Oxycontin without a prescription

"don't believe in them" what the actual blank! it's not a matter of belief, it's a matter of healthy dumbies.


----------



## Gunnhilde

kassiaethne said:


> haosdihaodihao (face banging on keys) I went to 3 different pharmacies in my neighborhood and asked for prenatal vitamins and they all said "oh we don't do that, or we don't support those....what the deuce you are a pharmacy you are suppose to have this stuff!!!! in the USA they have em on the shelves and you don't even HAVE TO ASK. in mexico....oh fuck your baby wanting self no vitamins for you...here have a Oxycontin without a prescription

Can you just get folic acid as a supplement and take a regular multivitamin? Or is that not available either?

I guess you could just eat lots of greens and other foods that are rich in it.

That is ridiculous though.


----------



## J_Lynn

kassiaethne said:


> haosdihaodihao (face banging on keys) I went to 3 different pharmacies in my neighborhood and asked for prenatal vitamins and they all said "oh we don't do that, or we don't support those....what the deuce you are a pharmacy you are suppose to have this stuff!!!! in the USA they have em on the shelves and you don't even HAVE TO ASK. in mexico....oh fuck your baby wanting self no vitamins for you...here have a Oxycontin without a prescription

Are they illegal or something? What is the big deal? That just is weird! They have them all over the place on the shelves - 10 different brands to choose from damn near.


----------



## GalvanBaby

kassiaethne said:


> haosdihaodihao (face banging on keys) I went to 3 different pharmacies in my neighborhood and asked for prenatal vitamins and they all said "oh we don't do that, or we don't support those....what the deuce you are a pharmacy you are suppose to have this stuff!!!! in the USA they have em on the shelves and you don't even HAVE TO ASK. in mexico....oh fuck your baby wanting self no vitamins for you...here have a Oxycontin without a prescription

What part of Mexico do you live in? I live in Tampico and lived in Monterrey and have been able to buy folic acid and prenatal vitamins.

I have bought mine at the Similares and the Benavides. 

You can find oxycotin?!?!? When I had surgery, the strongest thing they gave me was Ketorolaco and that doesn't relieve a toothache, muchless a surgical cut.


----------



## tamithomas

Dear mothers in stores, stop ignoring your kid who's crying like a tornado siren!!! I come to do groceries in peace, if I wanna hear a crying kid it will be at the comfort of my own home. Or at least acknowledge to kid and try to calm him down!! :growlmad:


----------



## oneKnight

Can't?? haha, I've been known to say them a few times, to certain people.


I've started telling my coworkers that having sex doesn't get you pregnant, it must be a myth that it does, because it doesn't work for me. They have quit asking, or at least they haven't asked recently. And that's about as rude as I can be to them. Several of them don't speak English, and while I can tell you all about food and cooking in Spanish (I work at a Mexican food place), medical terms regarding infertility were beyond the scope of high school Spanish class.....


----------



## tsyhanochka

So I actually vented at my sister today. One more "when you have kids" comment than I could take. I told her it won't be for a long time and hearing it every day is just hard with both our moms and lots of coworkers commenting so often I couldn't take it at home too. 
She started pouting at the dinner table and said "its not like I said you had to pop one out or anything...I was just saying when you do have them..." and I cut her off and said "which you say daily and its getting on my nerves".

I feel bad to have snapped but I needed it to stop. I can't break down and tell her about us ttc. I won't do it. The more people know the more I feel pressure. I wish I hadn't told the few I have told.


----------



## babymabey

tsyhanochka said:


> So I actually vented at my sister today. One more "when you have kids" comment than I could take. I told her it won't be for a long time and hearing it every day is just hard with both our moms and lots of coworkers commenting so often I couldn't take it at home too.
> She started pouting at the dinner table and said "its not like I said you had to pop one out or anything...I was just saying when you do have them..." and I cut her off and said "which you say daily and its getting on my nerves".
> 
> I feel bad to have snapped but I needed it to stop. I can't break down and tell her about us ttc. I won't do it. The more people know the more I feel pressure. I wish I hadn't told the few I have told.

I know where you are coming from. I made the mistake of telling my mother that we were TTC and I regret it everyday because everyday she brings it up. "Oh, I can't wait till you have a baby", she is even getting into more personal questions like asking if I am ovulating, and how are we going to make a baby if our dogs sleep in the bed with us. I have explained to her numerous times that I don't like it when she brings it up because it just stresses me out, yet she continues to bring it up. It has gotten to the point that I just don't call her much anymore.


----------



## havestar

tamithomas said:


> Dear mothers in stores, stop ignoring your kid who's crying like a tornado siren!!! I come to do groceries in peace, if I wanna hear a crying kid it will be at the comfort of my own home. Or at least acknowledge to kid and try to calm him down!! :growlmad:

Can I vent about this? LOL

I'm a mom of three boys. My kids are surprisingly well behaved at the store, less at home, but it's not always easy. I can only think of one time where one of my kids threw a temper tantrum, pretty recently in fact. He's in his terrible twos and he's testing my patience. 

It's not always easy as a parent to know what works most effectively with each child. They're all different. What works with my oldest didn't work with my middle child.. and he's really a hard nut to crack. What works with both of them doesn't work with my toddler. 

Having said all of that, unless you have kids, you should really just ignore it and shut up about it. Yeah it's annoying, I hear it every single weekend that I'm at the store. But I'm not about to go up to some lady and tell her how to parent her child unless I see abuse involved. 

Last weekend a father was holding his child, sitting on the floor of the store, while his kid screamed bloody murder. This went on for at least five minutes. Definitely not something I would have done with my kids - but I listen to him explain to a stranger that it was the only way he would calm down, because he would refuse to listen. And right after the kid 'got it all out' he was fine. My 6 year old kind of does the same thing.. he gets all in a huff, and I send him to his room, he vents and then it's like nothing happened.

Sometimes, the kid is testing your response. A woman I knew had a child who would hold her breath until she passed out. Ignoring her and not giving into that type of behavior is how they got past it.

It's really hard as a parent to ignore your kid when they're screaming. The one time my son did that at the store that's exactly what I did. I let him scream for a few minutes, then I talked to him again and he was fine. I knew he was just tired and he wasn't really fussing about anything in particular, but I wasn't going to baby him for the sake of someone in the next aisle. It only takes ONE TIME for my son to pick up a habit. That sounds extreme but it's the truth. 

Anyway, I don't mean to be rude or anything.. but we'll see what happens when you have one doing the same thing!


----------



## AlyCon

havestar said:


> Having said all of that, unless you have kids, you should really just ignore it and shut up about it.
> 
> 
> Anyway, I don't mean to be rude or anything.. but we'll see what happens when you have one doing the same thing!

I really dont mean to start a fight or anything, but its *extremely insensitive *to come into the TTC section and use phrases like that! Especially when many women here, including the one you said those things to, have suffered from miscarriages and WOULD have children right now if those pregnancies had been successful. The last thing they need is you coming on their vent thread, the only "safe place" some of us have, and carelessly throwing around that kind of language. So *PLEASE THINK* before you post here. Again, i dont want to start a war but considering Tami's recent loss, I just had to say something.


----------



## havestar

AlyCon said:


> I really dont mean to start a fight or anything, but its *extremely insensitive *to come into the TTC section and use phrases like that! Especially when many women here, including the one you said those things to, have suffered from miscarriages and WOULD have children right now if those pregnancies had been successful. The last thing they need is you coming on their vent thread, the only "safe place" some of us have, and carelessly throwing around that kind of language. So *PLEASE THINK* before you post here. Again, i dont want to start a war but considering Tami's recent loss, I just had to say something.

I think it's a bit ridiculous that you would say that's insensitive or that I didn't think about every single word that I wrote. I didn't say "IF YOU EVER have a kid." I never mentioned her loss. I said "when".. because it's going to happen and I guarantee you that her child will throw a tantrum at some point in his/her life.. and she's going to get dirty looks about how she's not parenting her child right because they're throwing a fit.. and she's going to remember what she said here.

I have the same right to vent. I have the same frustrations about people at the grocery store - but I would have left it at that.. and not made mention about how the woman should have parented in that situation.


----------



## AlyCon

havestar said:


> Having said all of that, *unless you have kids*, you should really just ignore it and shut up about it.


case closed.


----------



## Gunnhilde

WTF is wrong with you body. You give me 60 day cycles, then 45 day ones, then 35 day no ovulation cycles. You freaking suck and I will take you on if you think you'll be getting away with another cycle without ovulation. What happened to my 13 years of 30 day cycles. Hmmmmmmm? I've always been nice to you and haven't taken birth control or used IUDs. Why do you have to double cross me like this?

Also, TCOYF application. I am not pregnant just because I got a positive OPK and still didn't get AF 18 days later. I just didn't ovulate. :growlmad:

Also, I'd like my baby stuff in Denmark, but why oh why does shipping have to cost more than gold. WTH!


----------



## angel2010

havestar said:


> tamithomas said:
> 
> 
> Dear mothers in stores, stop ignoring your kid who's crying like a tornado siren!!! I come to do groceries in peace, if I wanna hear a crying kid it will be at the comfort of my own home. Or at least acknowledge to kid and try to calm him down!! :growlmad:
> 
> Can I vent about this? LOL
> 
> I'm a mom of three boys. My kids are surprisingly well behaved at the store, less at home, but it's not always easy. I can only think of one time where one of my kids threw a temper tantrum, pretty recently in fact. He's in his terrible twos and he's testing my patience.
> 
> It's not always easy as a parent to know what works most effectively with each child. They're all different. What works with my oldest didn't work with my middle child.. and he's really a hard nut to crack. What works with both of them doesn't work with my toddler.
> 
> Having said all of that, unless you have kids, you should really just ignore it and shut up about it. Yeah it's annoying, I hear it every single weekend that I'm at the store. But I'm not about to go up to some lady and tell her how to parent her child unless I see abuse involved.
> 
> Last weekend a father was holding his child, sitting on the floor of the store, while his kid screamed bloody murder. This went on for at least five minutes. Definitely not something I would have done with my kids - but I listen to him explain to a stranger that it was the only way he would calm down, because he would refuse to listen. And right after the kid 'got it all out' he was fine. My 6 year old kind of does the same thing.. he gets all in a huff, and I send him to his room, he vents and then it's like nothing happened.
> 
> Sometimes, the kid is testing your response. A woman I knew had a child who would hold her breath until she passed out. Ignoring her and not giving into that type of behavior is how they got past it.
> 
> It's really hard as a parent to ignore your kid when they're screaming. The one time my son did that at the store that's exactly what I did. I let him scream for a few minutes, then I talked to him again and he was fine. I knew he was just tired and he wasn't really fussing about anything in particular, but I wasn't going to baby him for the sake of someone in the next aisle. It only takes ONE TIME for my son to pick up a habit. That sounds extreme but it's the truth.
> 
> Anyway, I don't mean to be rude or anything.. but we'll see what happens when you have one doing the same thing!Click to expand...


I would like to rant about this too. It is a bit insensitive to think that mother's of tantruming children should not be allowed to go to the grocery store, or we should stay home so other's don't have to hear it. Do you think we want make others listen to it? Do you think we even want to listen to it ourselves? Don't you think if there was some magical way to make them stop that we would have done it? How do you know that this woman didn't already acknowledge her child, warned them and is just now letting them get on with it because nothing else has worked?


----------



## tiger

> Having said all of that, unless you have kids

This statement is extremely insensitive and rude to the majority, if not ALL the ladies in this forum.

Please take a moment to read over our terms of service :


> Rudeness, flaming or trolling is not tolerated on, or about, BabyandBump or its members. Any member who is intentionally disruptive may have their account restricted or banned without warning.
> Antisocial, discriminatory or offensive messages (intended or otherwise) aimed at the community at large, certain demographics (including parenting styles) or specific members, are not permitted.

Before you hit the post button, i strongly urge you to re read what you are going to post next time.


----------



## tiger

AlyCon said:


> havestar said:
> 
> 
> Having said all of that, *unless you have kids*, you should really just ignore it and shut up about it.
> 
> 
> case closed.Click to expand...

If you have an issue with a member or a post, please report it. There is no need to display it like this.

Back on topic please ladies


----------



## J_Lynn

I have a bloody sinus infection :( And this hurricane that is coming up from Louisiana is going to give us severe thunderstorms, and my sinus infections always get 100x worse in bad weather. The damp/humid/gross weather just makes me even more miserable. 

I wish mother-nature would re-route the hurricane back into the middle of the ocean for my sinus infections sake, and the sake of the all people in the line of the storm for general safety reasons <3


----------



## oneKnight

J_Lynn said:


> I have a bloody sinus infection :( And this hurricane that is coming up from Louisiana is going to give us severe thunderstorms, and my sinus infections always get 100x worse in bad weather. The damp/humid/gross weather just makes me even more miserable.
> 
> I wish mother-nature would re-route the hurricane back into the middle of the ocean for my sinus infections sake, and the sake of the all people in the line of the storm for general safety reasons <3

On that same note, our brand freakin new a/c went out 3 days ago - just in time for the humidity level to skyrocket. Its so stuffy that we have to open a window, but its also so humid the floor gets damp!!! Unbelievable!!! 
But, we have a tiny unit that only cools the small bedroom, so at least we can sleep. Too bad I'm not ovulating, as much time as we are "hiding" in the bedroom together this week LOL


----------



## tamithomas

Vent: I totally understand as to why they time cap selling booze at shops as its to prevent profit tipping from bars but wish it still didn't exist. DH started making something in the crock pot with beef and beer, realized he didn't have enough beer and it was passed 11pm. Gonna be watered down now due to it absolutely needing to be done for tomorrow evening.

J_Lynn: I hope you'll be okay, heard it's a nasty one heading down there. Stay safe! xox


----------



## tamithomas

angel2010 said:


> havestar said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> tamithomas said:
> 
> 
> Dear mothers in stores, stop ignoring your kid who's crying like a tornado siren!!! I come to do groceries in peace, if I wanna hear a crying kid it will be at the comfort of my own home. Or at least acknowledge to kid and try to calm him down!! :growlmad:
> 
> Can I vent about this? LOL
> 
> I'm a mom of three boys. My kids are surprisingly well behaved at the store, less at home, but it's not always easy. I can only think of one time where one of my kids threw a temper tantrum, pretty recently in fact. He's in his terrible twos and he's testing my patience.
> 
> It's not always easy as a parent to know what works most effectively with each child. They're all different. What works with my oldest didn't work with my middle child.. and he's really a hard nut to crack. What works with both of them doesn't work with my toddler.
> 
> Having said all of that, unless you have kids, you should really just ignore it and shut up about it. Yeah it's annoying, I hear it every single weekend that I'm at the store. But I'm not about to go up to some lady and tell her how to parent her child unless I see abuse involved.
> 
> Last weekend a father was holding his child, sitting on the floor of the store, while his kid screamed bloody murder. This went on for at least five minutes. Definitely not something I would have done with my kids - but I listen to him explain to a stranger that it was the only way he would calm down, because he would refuse to listen. And right after the kid 'got it all out' he was fine. My 6 year old kind of does the same thing.. he gets all in a huff, and I send him to his room, he vents and then it's like nothing happened.
> 
> Sometimes, the kid is testing your response. A woman I knew had a child who would hold her breath until she passed out. Ignoring her and not giving into that type of behavior is how they got past it.
> 
> It's really hard as a parent to ignore your kid when they're screaming. The one time my son did that at the store that's exactly what I did. I let him scream for a few minutes, then I talked to him again and he was fine. I knew he was just tired and he wasn't really fussing about anything in particular, but I wasn't going to baby him for the sake of someone in the next aisle. It only takes ONE TIME for my son to pick up a habit. That sounds extreme but it's the truth.
> 
> Anyway, I don't mean to be rude or anything.. but we'll see what happens when you have one doing the same thing!Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I would like to rant about this too. It is a bit insensitive to think that mother's of tantruming children should not be allowed to go to the grocery store, or we should stay home so other's don't have to hear it. Do you think we want make others listen to it? Do you think we even want to listen to it ourselves? Don't you think if there was some magical way to make them stop that we would have done it? How do you know that this woman didn't already acknowledge her child, warned them and is just now letting them get on with it because nothing else has worked?Click to expand...

Not gonna lie, that "unless you have kids" was a real low blow bellow the belt. This is a venting thread where I thought we were aloud to vent about what we wanted without being judged. That being said, I apologize if you feel offended by my previous vent. I was referring to the ones who walk around with a smile on their face and if you dare ask them to at least acknowledge their kids they nearly bite your hand off and give nasty remarks such as "they're kids, it's what they do..they cry!" Like as if it's normal for them to throw tantrums. I'm not talking about those who try everything to at least calm them down. PS I was not referring to you women specifically so please try not to take my vent personally next time. Thank you.


----------



## tsyhanochka

Can I vent that I was offended by the "unless you have kids" remark and DID report it....and it still seems to be there? So I need to know if that kind of insensitive low blow is OK and other behaviour is not......
If that's permitted then I'm leaving this thread because I don't feel comfortable here venting.


----------



## NewYearNewMe

I would like to say - hurry up :witch: I know it's only been 3 weeks since I had my implant removed but I want to start ttc RIGHT NOW! Typical :witch: - when you don't want her to arrive - she is their in the blink of an eye and when you really want her to show her ugly face - she is nowhere to be seen! Grrrrrrrr Impatient and broody!


----------



## nic18

can i vent about this thread? is this not suppose to be where we can vent about anything in the world and nobody takes it to heart? this is not to anyone in particular, cause it has happened more than once. we are supposed to come here to say anything we want and not get judged or for people to have a dig at us. lets just keep this thread to saying what we want and nobody weather you take it to heart or not can say anything? nobody is saying anything to offend anyone on this forum!


----------



## Gunnhilde

I should have left this thread last time, but I didn't realize it was ok to rag on other mothers on this board (especially an incredibly common part of motherhood), even in a vent thread. 

I've got social anxiety and I go to a support group for it. The leader of my group has decided not to have children, even though she desperately wants them, because she couldn't handle the pressure of someone telling her off for a kid having a temper tantrum in a supermarket. My heart breaks for her a million times over.

I find this thread to be mean to mothers and the way they raise children. Vent over in TTC #1 if you want to rant against women who already have children or them not spoiling a child.

Or how about just ranting without making it into an attack on something I'd bet 90% of mothers do. :shrug:


----------



## nic18

gunnhilde- i know exactly where you are coming from, but the full point in this thread is for you to say whatever you want, while i know some people have a did at people, but people also come on here and give us ttc'ers a dig to. while i dont think its right to have a dig anyone, pregnant a mum or someone ttc, it happens. but this vent thread was set up for people to get whatever is bothering them off there mind without offending anybody, because they are not talking about anyone of this forum (i hope) xx


----------



## cntrygrl

For some reason I thought this thread was for people TTC their first. I must've misread or something. Perhaps we should create a new thread "Vent's for people TTC their first child" With that said there is no reason people can't take their child outside of the store or into a bathroom til the child stops making a fuss. I'm pretty sure this is why some restaurants are no longer allowing children and on flights some families are split up. I have a niece and nephew whom I've helped raise so far. They are 6 and 4, luckily we've never had to deal with this kind of behavior. Kids are little people and need to learn the right and wrong ways to behave in public.


----------



## Tasha

Hugs girls. It isnt very fair on a vent thread to vent and rant about someone else's rant that wasnt aimed at anyone in particular just a social situation. I do have three children with me, and my girls in heaven as well as my miscarriages. Just yesterday my daughter had what other people would consider a massive tantrum, but she is on the autistic spectrum and therefore it was a meltdown not her being 'naughty' iykwim? People gave me and her evil looks, I wont lie it hurts BUT these thoughts are natural. I have been out in the supermarket and feeling low and someones newborn has been crying for a good twenty minutes without anyone comforting them, and I thought for goodness just pick them up, but I dont know whats wrong or if like my dad that baby couldnt be held for a medical reason. I have been in the supermarket and had a headache and heard a child of about four or five screaming for thirty minutes, really high pitch, just non-stop and I have thought please just do something, acknowledge your child, I dont know if that child is on autistic spectrum (I always consider this now my daughter is though), or why they are screaming, I dont know what works for them with discipline. 

Those thoughts may of been wrong, but those moments in time my heart ached for a baby, or my head hurt and the screaming didnt help. I am not perfect, none of us are and so these thoughts creeping in are normal. As long as you dont go up to the parents and rant at them, you try to rein in the evils, then I think releasing your vent here does no harm. :flower:


----------



## AlyCon

Honestly if you cant take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Coming into the vent thread "just to read" the vents is like looking for trouble. Anyone who decides to scroll through most likely will find SOMETHING that offends them. I get offended on here by some vents from my fellow TTCers but i NEVER say anything because i know theyre just venting and what theyre saying probably isnt their actual belief in general. And even if it is thats their right to feel that way. The only time i respond to a vent is when some one new who doesnt even frequent this thread decides they want to get "offended" by another womans vent that they CHOSE to come here and read and make a response post. ITS LIKE GOING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY AND BEING OFFENDED BY *THEIR* CULTURE. _If you dont like it, get on the first thing smokin and go back home!_ But DONT insult them by assuming they should all change to please you. And its no coincidence that the only people who post about being "offended" by a vent are always ladies from pregnancy forums or moms (that are not TTC). Its never another TTCer that takes offence to a vent. And yes i do go over to pregnancy and mommy forums and yes sometimes i see offensive comments about IFs and TTCers ("Its not our fault they cant get pregnant!") but i NEVER respond to those either. And we should get the same respect. Just sayin..


----------



## Tasha

My rant is; I wish that I knew what my body was doing. I am on day five of a :) I dont get it. :shrug:


----------



## nic18

AlyCon said:


> Honestly if you cant take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Coming into the vent thread "just to read" the vents is like looking for trouble. Anyone who decides to scroll through most likely will find SOMETHING that offends them. I get offended on here by some vents from my fellow TTCers but i NEVER say anything because i know theyre just venting and what theyre saying probably isnt their actual belief in general. And even if it is thats their right to feel that way. The only time i respond to a vent is when some one new who doesnt even frequent this thread decides they want to get "offended" by another womans vent that they CHOSE to come here and read and make a response post. ITS LIKE GOING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY AND BEING OFFENDED BY *THEIR* CULTURE. _If you dont like it, get on the first thing smokin and go back home!_ But DONT insult them by assuming they should all change to please you. And its no coincidence that the only people who post about being "offended" by a vent are always ladies from pregnancy forums or moms (that are not TTC). Its never another TTCer that takes offence to a vent. And yes i do go over to pregnancy and mommy forums and yes sometimes i see offensive comments about IFs and TTCers ("Its not our fault they cant get pregnant!") but i NEVER respond to those either. And we should get the same respect. Just sayin..

wooooooooo!!!!!! well said!!


----------



## cntrygrl

Lol, Tasha don't you wish we had an inside view of our body at all times that we could just pull up on a screen. We could look at it and go "Oh ok there's the problem".


----------



## AlyCon

*Nic18* Thanks! Although i cant help but get the feeling that i've made that same speech at least once before. But you know how that goes.. ](*,)


----------



## Tasha

cntrygrl said:


> Lol, Tasha don't you wish we had an inside view of our body at all times that we could just pull up on a screen. We could look at it and go "Oh ok there's the problem".

:haha: Yes, that would be fab, although maybe a little gross too. Not sure my hubby would be in the mood if I was looking at my ovaries ten minutes before :rofl:

I usually ovulate around CD 36 + so to get a :) at CD 18 I was very happy, but now I am confused. How can I peak for five days when it is usually 2-3 days max? :shrug: I have a feeling my egg wasnt released, which would be rubbish wouldnt it? Grrrr.


----------



## AlyCon

*cntrygrl* you could always start a vent thread in the "TTC #1" section! :) Not sure if they already have one, but its worth a try!


----------



## cntrygrl

Very much so. I stopped doing OPK's they were stressing me out too much.


----------



## nic18

AlyCon said:


> *Nic18* Thanks! Although i cant help but get the feeling that i've made that same speech at least once before. But you know how that goes.. ](*,)

yeah i know i've seen other posts about people saying this :)


----------



## havestar

AlyCon said:


> Honestly if you cant take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Coming into the vent thread "just to read" the vents is like looking for trouble. Anyone who decides to scroll through most likely will find SOMETHING that offends them....

Pot, meet kettle.

You seem to be the one who can't take the heat. I am free to post my opinions, just as anyone else. 



> ITS LIKE GOING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY AND BEING OFFENDED BY THEIR CULTURE.

Your analogy makes no sense. What exactly qualifies as a TTCer? Is the fact that I have three children already and haven't been trying for X amount of months an automatic disqualification? I find it really *insensitive* that you would discriminate against me when you don't know what I've been through in the past or where I'm at now. I am TTC and I was offended by her vent. Plain and simple.

I came in here to post a rant and got sidetracked when I read over the last couple. Hence the reason my post is only a couple after hers. 



> but this vent thread was set up for people to get whatever is bothering them off there mind without offending anybody, because they are not talking about anyone of this forum (i hope)

Maybe this should be expressed in the first post, which I did read for rules. 



> I find this thread to be mean to mothers and the way they raise children. Vent over in TTC #1 if you want to rant against women who already have children or them not spoiling a child.

This. Exactly.


----------



## nic18

havestar said:


> AlyCon said:
> 
> 
> Honestly if you cant take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Coming into the vent thread "just to read" the vents is like looking for trouble. Anyone who decides to scroll through most likely will find SOMETHING that offends them....
> 
> Pot, meet kettle.
> 
> You seem to be the one who can't take the heat. I am free to post my opinions, just as anyone else.
> 
> 
> 
> ITS LIKE GOING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY AND BEING OFFENDED BY THEIR CULTURE.Click to expand...
> 
> Your analogy makes no sense. What exactly qualifies as a TTCer? Is the fact that I have three children already and haven't been trying for X amount of months an automatic disqualification? I find it really *insensitive* that you would discriminate against me when you don't know what I've been through in the past or where I'm at now. I am TTC and I was offended by her vent. Plain and simple.
> 
> I came in here to post a rant and got sidetracked when I read over the last couple. Hence the reason my post is only a couple after hers.
> 
> 
> 
> but this vent thread was set up for people to get whatever is bothering them off there mind without offending anybody, because they are not talking about anyone of this forum (i hope)Click to expand...
> 
> Maybe this should be expressed in the first post, which I did read for rules.
> 
> 
> 
> I find this thread to be mean to mothers and the way they raise children. Vent over in TTC #1 if you want to rant against women who already have children or them not spoiling a child.Click to expand...
> 
> This. Exactly.Click to expand...

havestar, sorry if any over our posts have offended you, but you have to understand when we get post offending us its not nice. when we vent we don't want to offend people at all! and no you are not disqualified at all :) but when its peoples first which i agree this should be in ttc#1 because we have a different view for people ttc there 2nd/3rd and so on :). so please don't take anything to heart, or feel you cannot post on here because you can, but everyone needs to respect each others views, but cannot have a personal attack!


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## KT Brown

I am ttc and I am ready to give it up. Being TTC makes you so much more alert then I wanted to be. I don't want to know who's pregnant, or hear another person brag about their BFP! I don't want to wonder and hope. I am ready to let it go.


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## havestar

nic18 said:


> havestar, sorry if any over our posts have offended you, but you have to understand when we get post offending us its not nice. when we vent we don't want to offend people at all! and no you are not disqualified at all :) but when its peoples first which i agree this should be in ttc#1 because we have a different view for people ttc there 2nd/3rd and so on :). so please don't take anything to heart, or feel you cannot post on here because you can, but everyone needs to respect each others views, but cannot have a personal attack!

I can agree with that. And maybe in retrospect I should have just PMed her (I'm assuming we can do that, I've never messaged anyone) and told her what I thought. 

I do apologize if whatever I said seemed excessively harsh, but my statement about _whenever she has kids she'll understand_ was not intentionally mean or neglectful of her TTC journey. I was simply pointing out that until you've been in the same situation you have no idea what it's like or how you'd react.


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## AlyCon

*Havestar* i respect your opinon and everybody elses. I never said you couldnt post here, anybody and everybody is welcome :) Just try your best not to get offended and even if you are do not target the OP of the "offensive post" with a personal attack. and choose your words more wisely, which is all i was trying to say in the first place. And i really do understand your point about "if you havent been through it dont judge those that are dealing with it." But just because we're ttc our first doesnt mean we have ZERO experience with children. I've been out with my niece several times and shes thrown tantrums and i've gotten the "oh my god get control over your kid" looks. But i just deal with them. And then a few days later when im out by myself i'll still catch myself giving another woman the look. so i've been on both sides of the fence and i get your point. Again, it all came down to your word choice.


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## AlyCon

KT Brown said:


> I am ttc and I am ready to give it up. Being TTC makes you so much more alert then I wanted to be. I don't want to know who's pregnant, or hear another person brag about their BFP! I don't want to wonder and hope. I am ready to let it go.

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs: Dont give up! Sending you lots of :dust:


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## nic18

havestar said:


> nic18 said:
> 
> 
> havestar, sorry if any over our posts have offended you, but you have to understand when we get post offending us its not nice. when we vent we don't want to offend people at all! and no you are not disqualified at all :) but when its peoples first which i agree this should be in ttc#1 because we have a different view for people ttc there 2nd/3rd and so on :). so please don't take anything to heart, or feel you cannot post on here because you can, but everyone needs to respect each others views, but cannot have a personal attack!
> 
> I can agree with that. And maybe in retrospect I should have just PMed her (I'm assuming we can do that, I've never messaged anyone) and told her what I thought.
> 
> I do apologize if whatever I said seemed excessively harsh, but my statement about _whenever she has kids she'll understand_ was not intentionally mean or neglectful of her TTC journey. I was simply pointing out that until you've been in the same situation you have no idea what it's like or how you'd react.Click to expand...

yeah you can PM:)! i know you never ment it to be hurtful, but like said abpve just think about word choice, but alot of us ladies ttc#1 do pin point little things like that, whereas people who have had children don't really see things like that as hurtful :)


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## Wobbles

I'm so sorry but I have closed this thread ... yet another thread that needs reviewing.

The team and I will be having a discussion about how to handle recent 'vent' threads and if we should now prevent these in the future. They are causing too much bad feelings not forgetting the back lash the team will probably get now because we can't win. Journals can be used for venting.

I see both sides of the feelings, well those who managed to express themselves without being rude. Members should remember there are Mums/Moms on the forum who are using the TTC sections and Mums/Moms shouldn't take anyone's venting as personal (if you think a reply is targeted at a member or the forum you should use the report post feature). 

Havestar your participation was not acceptable forum activity, I'm sure you would not take to kindly to being told to shut up by someone who doesn't understand a situation in your life. Ladies who are TTC #1 will find your post incredibly insensitive and lacking empathy in some cases with such a manner. I'd like to request that maybe you take your own advice in the future (since it seems acceptable in your world) before submitting your post ... On a serious note the preview option is a good feature maybe think about using it?


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