# want be single mom?



## madzia

What do You think about women who is single and want to be single mom? 

:cloud9:


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## Ceejay123

Do you mean women that are single and want to get pregnant/raise the child alone? Or women that choose to cut their OH out so that they can raise a child alone? 

For women that are single and decide to have a baby... I think they're incredibly strong and brave. It just depends on how they go about getting pregnant - For example tricking somebody is not exactly fair, but going through a spermbank... Is fair. I think it's incredibly difficult to be a single Mum, I respect them deeply. I was raised by my Mum, as I had no contact with my father... I respect her so much for it. x


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## teal

Being a single mother isn't something I would want for my son if I had a choice.


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## Ceejay123

I agree. I'm glad my Son has both me and his Daddy. It's so much better.. I hated not knowing my father, but my mother didn't have the choice, so I respect her for managing to do it alone. Women that choose to lock the father out for no reason... No, i don't respect that. x


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## madzia

Ceejay123 said:


> Do you mean women that are single and want to get pregnant/raise the child alone? Or women that choose to cut their OH out so that they can raise a child alone?
> 
> For women that are single and decide to have a baby... I think they're incredibly strong and brave. It just depends on how they go about getting pregnant - For example tricking somebody is not exactly fair, but going through a spermbank... Is fair. I think it's incredibly difficult to be a single Mum, I respect them deeply. I was raised by my Mum, as I had no contact with my father... I respect her so much for it. x

I mean that women are single and want to get pregnant/raise the child alone until she find someone with who she want to raise the baby.


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## tiasmummy

i would not advise intentionally getting pregnant as a single mum but thats just my opinion. i had different opinions before i got pregnant i thought it was ok, now i see its not really ok to go in with that intention, for everyone involved. yes adoption/sperm banks is there for a reason and as long as a mature and sensible woman who is financially stable and ready for a child in her life uses that there are no issues. however, i wouldnt advise someone to get pregnant from a one night stand (had this experience recently with a family member) not only is it awkward to explain to everybody including your child, its not fair on the guy to trap him & its not fair on the child. alot of ppl will end up regretting doing things this way and wish they waited. your time will come, dont rush it with the wrong person.


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## Kate&Lucas

I know there are women on here who've used sperm banks to get pregnant without an OH. I just can't imagine why anyone would wish to be a single parent. Though I love my son more than anything and take a different view now, had I known three years ago I'd be doing this alone I'd not have become a parent.

I'd love another child but I won't be thinking about it until I'm in a commited relationship. That said, should it turn abusive like it did with FOB, I'd take the decision to become a single parent again. I grew up with an abusive father and spent the last few years of his life, along with my sisters, trying to persuade my Mum to leave him, despite only being kids ourselves. I wouldn't let a child of mine live through that, there are some situations where being a single parent is a preferable option.


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## Ceejay123

I don't believe in tricking a man into having a child, at all. Sperm banks etc... I suppose it's all on the woman whether she's stable enough and strong enough to do it. Personally I'm glad my LO has his father.. 

I respect women that bring children up alone through no fault of their own, it must be so tough. But I couldn't imagine choosing that life for my child. I grew up without my Dad, and it does leave you constantly wondering.


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## Shezza84uk

I would not wish this on my children if I had a choice and if I could salvage a relationship with their father to keep them stable I would!! Each to their own however for me I wish I could change the circumstances xx


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## drsquid

im 39 and running out of time. it would be stupid to get together with someone simply to have a kid. i didnt like the idea of a known donor cause i didnt like the idea of saying to a kid.. so and so is your dad but he isnt really your dad etc.. i used a sperm bank. im currently 4 weeks pregnant. is it ideal? no but i cant imagine never having a child. id love to find someone and hope illl find someone someday but that wasnt my primary concern


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## Fraggles

I was happy to be a happy single mum than an unhappy abused part of a relationship. My children dont see their biological father but my current partner treats them just like his own.


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## Lola2605

I'm currently 3 months pregnant with my 1st child. I am single and this was a very unexpected accident. I don't look forward to people's perceptions of single women who choose to have a baby alone when faced with that decision. There still appears to be a lot of judgement. 

I also think that we can rarely say a man is 'tricked' into getting a woman pregnant. I'm sure they know how a baby is made and have to take responsibility for not taking precautions (as i have!). 

I admire women who outright plan their pregnancy alone...I wish mine wasn't such a shock (although i'm starting to feel happier now the shock has sunk in)
:happydance:


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## resursval

Ceejay123 said:


> Do you mean women that are single and want to get pregnant/raise the child alone? Or women that choose to cut their OH out so that they can raise a child alone?
> 
> For women that are single and decide to have a baby... I think they're incredibly strong and brave. It just depends on how they go about getting pregnant - For example tricking somebody is not exactly fair, but going through a spermbank... Is fair. I think it's incredibly difficult to be a single Mum, I respect them deeply. I was raised by my Mum, as I had no contact with my father... I respect her so much for it. x

Thank you for your kind words.


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## winbig82

Im about to become a single mum, through no fault of my own - I cant stay with an abusive drink/drug addict which he has become since our LO was born and I know I alone will give her a million times better life than being in a couple - He has nothing to do with her and we live under the same roof :( xx


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## resursval

I chose to be alone from day 1. Was never a question of me and him together.


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## tiasmummy

see most of us mums here would of loved to still be with babys father (me included) but due to abuse its just not possible :cry: i feel so much better knowing im not the only one! i held on for so long with my babys dad hopeing he would change, he didnt so i left him and still gave him the option of seeing our daughter in a contact centre, which he declined so unfortunately im left holding the baby!


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## Ceejay123

He sounds like an idiot sweetie, don't lose sleep over him.. x


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## MommaAlexis

I see absolutely nothing wrong with a woman choosing to be a single parent via donor, sperm banks, etc. If I didn't have my LO and had a stable job in the future I would 100% have done that. Funny enough is I ended up a single mom either way, even though this was a planned pregnancy with my fiance. I was 9 weeks when he left, I have many people ask me why I didn't abort... I WANTED her. I don't care if he changed his mind, I did not.


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## resursval

MommaAlexis said:


> I see absolutely nothing wrong with a woman choosing to be a single parent via donor, sperm banks, etc. If I didn't have my LO and had a stable job in the future I would 100% have done that. Funny enough is I ended up a single mom either way, even though this was a planned pregnancy with my fiance. I was 9 weeks when he left, I have many people ask me why I didn't abort... I WANTED her. I don't care if he changed his mind, I did not.

Yes people has the cheek! To talk about unborn life as if it's some kind of garbage... The respect of life is gone.


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## tiasmummy

yeh its not really ur fault after youve planned a baby with someone if they choose to get lost afterwards then you have to get on with it! us women are emotionally strong we can deal with it! let the men run if they cant handle it *shakes head*


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## ellebelle

Now that I know what a piece of work my FOB is, I'd rather be doing it alone. I have very supportive parents and my dad can be the strong positive male influence in my daughters' lives.
However, FOB is around (when he wants to be) and it's alright... but I'd rather be WITH him doing it together than have him float around whenever he "has time" for his daughters.

Anyway, if someone wants to parent alone, that's their choice and not necessarily a bad thing.


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