# Francesca Mae's arrival story...



## Siuan

Well, that was a LONG process and probably about the hardest thing I've ever done or expected to have to do! 

WARNING - if you're worried about your birth, look away now... this ain't pretty. It's also LONG! I&#8217;ll put a link to a photo of my gorgeous little girl at the bottom though :)

So, the saga started:

*Sunday 8th April *
8am induction booked and I go into hospital. Midwife examines me and says I'm a good 3cm dilated, monitors show regular uterus tightenings (with no pain so far yay!) and that although it would be slightly uncomfortable, he suggests avoiding prostin/pessary and going straight to ARM (water breaking). He calls to delivery suite and they put me on the waiting list. 

Despite a couple of false alarms where rooms became available before being taken by emergencies, I was on the waiting list for the rest of the day. I saw a woman come in at 10am for induction who'd been due the same day as me. Only for her to go into labour naturally and take MY delivery room (funny now, but at the time I was in floods of tears)

Eventually at 6pm after a shift change in the staffing, the new midwife on duty (a very annoying ingratiating mouse of a woman) advised that I should now consider taking the pessary after all. After a long day of rollercoaster emotions I declined in favour of waiting for a delivery room. Mental exhaustion was kicking in as well as physical as I'd spent ALL day bouncing/gyrating on a birthing ball. 

At 8pm, I'd had enough, went to the nurse's station and told them that if they didn't find me a bed by 10pm I was going home (no way I was spending a night in a ward potentially in early labour after a mentally exhausting day). At 9pm I went home. Having been in hospital for 13 hours and having had no further intervention than a 3rd sweep administered by the morning midwife. 

*Monday 9th April*
Return to hospital for a 10am appointment. Pessary inserted as delivery suite still as busy as yesterday. But now refreshed and hoping to get ARM anyway as soon as a room available (this was agreed with ANOTHER new midwife on my arrival after a discussion of yesterday's antics. They don't usually allow ARM before 24 hours of pessary)

Nothing happens! So, we wait, and I bounce, I get monitored (too much) and we wait some more. 

At 23:00 I'm moved into a spare room in the delivery suite, find I&#8217;m still a &#8220;good&#8221; 3cm, get ARM and finally things start to happen. From here it got blurry, but I remember asking for Meptid (which is an alternative to Pethidine but doesn&#8217;t transfer across the uterine wall to baby) and I know that at one point I was on a ball with my TENS machine with gas & air because my OH took a photo!! 

*Tuesday 10th April*
My labouring was all in my back and I was really struggling with it. The meptid barely touched it and the only way I could get through it was with gas & air alongside the tens machine being boosted. In hindsight I wonder if perhaps I was being a bit wussy about it all, but at the time it was unmanageable. 

So I asked for and got an epidural. That worked for 2 hours and was total bliss, but then the pains started coming back again. In the end I had 3 or 4 visits from the anaesthetist and her boss the anaesthetist consultant. They fitted a booster button which would deliver 50% of an hour&#8217;s dosage in 2 mins when pressed, but could only be pressed once every half an hour (well, you could press it, but it wouldn&#8217;t do anything unless half an hour had passed!) 

In the end I remember the consultant shaking his head in confusion and making a comment that the amount of anaesthetic I&#8217;d had should be enough to drop a Rhino! 

Somehow though by about 2:30pm or so, I&#8217;d managed to dilate to 10cm and I was told that we were going to try an hour of pushing. My God, that was hard! I put in every effort I possibly could, but LO didn&#8217;t move down at all. I could tell that nothing was happening, I just wasn&#8217;t feeling it and they kept trying to reach baby&#8217;s head, but it was just as far up as before (believe me I felt that too!). I was getting exhausted and so I was advised that I would be best off going down to theatre to have the ventouse or forceps administered (I still didn&#8217;t want the forceps so they agreed to only use ventouse) and to prepare for a potential c-section. I signed the consent form (best writing I&#8217;ve ever done! ;)) and after a panic about leaving my gas & air behind was rushed down to the operating theatre. 

I know that the medical staff bless them managed to get me to theatre before the next contraction kicked in and I am ETERNALLY grateful to them for that because I really don&#8217;t think I could&#8217;ve breathed through it as I was told we would by the midwife if I got &#8220;caught short&#8221; in the middle of the corridor! 

I remember a lot of stuff going on at once, my drip was messed about with and I felt a warm liquid all over my feet. I thought it was saline solution &#8211; turned out to be blood where the drip hadn&#8217;t been put in properly (or something!) and when they tried to attach something to it, it sprayed blood everywhere. I remember having to sit still for 20 mins whilst the anaesthetist put in a spinal and I was laid down on the operating table with it tilted to the left at quite an angle (I think they were trying to get baby to move). A most surreal experience I can tell you. 

The one thing that really sticks with me was the fact that I said something to one of the nurses about them not getting the baby out whilst my legs were straight and together and she laughed. Told me to take a look and I just lifted my head enough to see my legs were in fact as far apart as they could get on stirrups! I was asked to try to move both legs, but couldn&#8217;t; at least the pain had stopped! 

OH arrived and the registrar told me she was about to use the ventouse and to push when I was told. How on earth you&#8217;re supposed to push when you can&#8217;t feel anything from your lower half, I really don&#8217;t know! But I did my best. Still nothing and so after a few minutes of them playing with the table to get it in the right position (which prompted OH to say something about how these people can put a human being back together again, but can&#8217;t manage to sort out an operating table!), they cut me open and baby was out within minutes. 

I saw them lift her away from the table and could see them wiping her down. I heard her first cry and just burst into tears myself. Such an emotional moment (I&#8217;m in tears just writing about it). Unfortunately, OH didn&#8217;t get a chance to cut the cord or anything and in the confusion had forgotten to bring a camera into theatre, but after a few minutes baby was brought over to me and I was able to hold her briefly although it was VERY awkward in that position and I could barely see her through the tears/blurry eyes (I&#8217;d had them closed for most of the labour). 

Francesca Mae was born at 16:16 on Tuesday 10th April, weighing 9lbs 7.5ozs after almost 30 hours of labouring. I lost 1.2 litres of blood (about 2.5 UK pints) though thankfully did not have a transfusion as that would&#8217;ve been the end of my blood donating days. Nothing went like it should (or at least as I had planned in my head beforehand), but thanks to modern medicine and the brilliant medical team we both are doing really well. Elective C-section next time I think, baby coped brilliantly, at no time did she show any distress, but I&#8217;m convinced my body is just not capable of a normal vaginal delivery. I&#8217;m going to be having a de-brief of it all with a senior midwife soon hopefully as I really need closure on it. Really, the most distressing/traumatic experience I&#8217;ve ever had, but completely worth it for my gorgeous little monkey girl :)

Link to a photo:
https://www.babyandbump.com/pregnancy-third-trimester/959465-finally-shes-here.html


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## Torontogal

Congratulations - your little girl is adorable! Sorry you had a rough several days but glad all is well now and baby is safe and sound.


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## stickylizard

congrats hun what an experience! xxx


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## Maviyildiz

Congratulations! 

Even though it was really traumatic for you, you actually tell the story in such a cool-headed style that I was able to read your story without freaking out. (I was nervous after I read your warning, but I couldn't resist reading it.)
I am impressed, I bet you are a tough one :)


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## Oddori

So sorry to hear you had such an ordeal but I'm glad your wee girl is with you safe & sound!
Many congratulations :flower:


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## angelandbump

Congratulations :flower: x


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## Mummy Bean

sorry it didnt all go to plan. but congrats on your absolutly beautiful little girl. 

Wishing u a speedy recovery! and hope to see u in the baby club. xx


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## Noirin

congrats x


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## Siuan

Thanks all. 

Maviyildiz - I've been told I'm coping very well with it all. My experience wasn't as bad as some seem to be at least I was "with it" quite soon after it all happened. There seem to be others who haven't fared so well. But it wasn't quite what I wanted to happen! I went through my very easy pregnancy with blinkers on really. Didn't expect anything to go wrong (though I joked that karma would come to get me during birth!) it pays to remember that there is no predicting how things will work and at least we ended up coming out of it both ok :)

Mummy Bean - I'm floating around Baby Club more these days. It is taking a while to wean myself out of Third Trimester!


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## staceyg

congrats! :)


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## foxiechick1

Aah she is gorgeous! Congratulations! I am sorry you had a bad time of it. What hospital was you in I live on Herts/Essex boarder and had my son in PAH Harlow. Congrats again she's beautiful! x


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## Siuan

We were ion Colchester for the birth and the first 24 hours after. Then we moved to Harwich maternity unit.


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## Fish&Chips

Congratulations on the arrival of your little one! 

I hope your debrief helps. I also had one after my emcs and I found it invaluable. My labour sounds very similar to yours after yours had got going. My epidural failed, my baby didn't descend, my canula kept falling out and spurting blood everywhere. I also had failed vontouse before the op. 

I was gutted that I didn't experience a natural birth but the mw at the debrief said I actually laboured well and that my son was back to back with an enormous head that got stuck. I now realise it wasn't my fault just that I was unlucky. I'm sure it will be the same for you. Xx


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## Siuan

Thanks for the reply. How long did it take for your debrief appt to come through? I've not heard anything yet and LO will be 4 weeks tomorrow...


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## Pinkgirl

Congratulations xx


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## Fish&Chips

I requested it some time after having my son as I didn't know you could have them until I casually mentioned to the HV that I wished I knew what had happened. They gave me a number to call and some while later (maybe 2 weeks) I had a call back with a suggested date. I would ask your HV for a number to chase. xx


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## Siuan

Fish&Chips said:


> I requested it some time after having my son as I didn't know you could have them until I casually mentioned to the HV that I wished I knew what had happened. They gave me a number to call and some while later (maybe 2 weeks) I had a call back with a suggested date. I would ask your HV for a number to chase. xx

Thanks, I'll do that. I have been told I'm on the list for an appointment, but seems that it's taking a while to get to me!


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## Fish&Chips

I hope you hear soon. I've just reread my notes and there's so much I had forgotten about. They're really invaluable. X


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## strdstkittenx

congrats :)


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## Fish&Chips

Hi hun, did you get your de-brief session date through? x


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## Siuan

No not yet... I'm going to mention it to GP at our 6 week checkup.


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## Fish&Chips

Fingers crossed it gets put in the diary soon x


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## Siuan

Fish&Chips... I got my appointment through. It's tomorrow 3pm with a Consultant. Just re-reading my story and writing down my questions now. 

Fingers crossed it'll help fill some holes.


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## crazylady5

congrats hun well done :) x


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## Fish&Chips

Great news! How did it go? Did you find it helpful? X


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## Siuan

It was so worthwhile!! I had most of my questions answered and realise that it was nothing I did wrong. Baby was facing the wrong way and there was no way I was ever going to be able to push her out myself. 

The ventouse apparently slipped off due to her position too so even that failed due to LO being an awkward little madam! 

I think the absolute best part of the entire thing was finding out that I can have a copy of my notes. That means the world to me because it means I can read it at my own leisure and fully understand things/refer to them when I come up with other questions. I've already written a letter to the admin lady to request the notes. 

I've also got much more hope that I can go natural for the next attempt and I've basically been told that another induction will not happen. Due to a risk of the scar weakening being higher during an induction they will only let me get to 41 weeks to go naturally otherwise they'll go for another c-section. And that can be "natural" too which means walking baby out, OH gets to cut the cord, immediate skin to skin... brilliant :)

Very happy with it all and I feel so much more at peace with the entire experience now.


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## Fish&Chips

That's brilliant news. It sounds so much like mine and I'm now pregnant with my 2nd and hoping for a vbac. I'm so chuffed for you! X


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## Siuan

Thank you!

Congratulations on your new pregnancy and fingers crossed you get your vbac. It'll be great if we can both do it after the EMCS!


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## Fish&Chips

Fingers crossed for both of us! xx


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## babygirlFTM12

just like my story! it is very rough but the little one makes it all worth it and even more :)


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## Mummy2B21

Congratulations hun xx


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## Siuan

babygirlFTM12 said:


> just like my story! it is very rough but the little one makes it all worth it and even more :)

Hey! I hope you're ok? I just tried to reply to your PM, but it got rejected. Hope you're alright anyway :)


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