# Letting a 9 week old cry it out?



## jenmcn1

This is meant to be a friendly thread, as I'm looking for advice with regards to my daughter. She is my 2nd child, I have a 3 year old son...and he was a pretty chilled out baby, easy.
My daughter is a delight, and soooo sweet. LOVE her! She's 9 weeks old, and wants to be held 24/7...she wants to be nursed to sleep, and a lot of the time will sleep in bed with my husband and I.
I'm trying to get her on a schedule, but I usually can't put her down for more than 5 min without her screaming! Its soooooo difficult when I have a 3yr old to look after as well, among other responsibilities to take care of. A friend of mine suggested letting her cry it out at nap times.
Since the daytime is the worst for us...

I'm sooooo torn...and I'm not completely against the cry it out method when their older. But at this age of 9 weeks old isn't it too early? I feel so lost and worried that I will harm my baby. 
And again this isn't to start an issue between all the moms on here-just looking for friendly advice and support thank you ladies:)


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## michelle25

oh i feel for you. i have heard good things about slings/carriers. my lo hated hers but she is my first so i didnt have a 3 yr old to run after. yours is still a newborn so i think she is too young for CIO. not sure if a 9 week old would benefit from any sleep training method. BEFORE you try it, think about how you would handle just letting her cry and cry until she falls asleep. :/ if you have reservations, dont do it! i think even in older infants, CIO is always the last resort. good luck!:flower:


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## MrsButterfly

My 8wo is exactly the same! Can't nap alone and will wake up in 5 mins if I dare to put him down when asleep on me. I've used a sling which is very helpful when you need to get stuff done around the house.

In terms of CIO I feel like he's too young and the only way it'd work is cos he'd physically exhaust himself to sleep rather than learning to self settle. I am worried tho that at some stage I will need to do this as I just can't see him changing himself. Maybe he'll surprise me! 

Hope you find a solution as I know how exhausting it is x


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## ZombieQueen

https://www.babywisemom.com/

This blog will answer any questions and help you establish a routine, as well as doing CIO properly. because contrary to popular belief, CIO isn't just putting down a screaming baby and walking away.


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## ArmyWife1984

I understand how you feel :hugs: My LO was the same way. Wanted to be held 24/7 and would cry the minute I put him down. We ended up cosleeping because it was the only way any of us could get any sleep. 
What helped me during the day was getting a sling/carrier. I was able to nurse him while walking around. 
I also switched him to formula at 4months and sometimes wish I would have done it sooner. He seemed to be more independant once I switched him to the bottle. He would easily fall asleep for naps with a bottle. You could try pumping and feeding him with a bottle that way. That is what i do for naps now and works like a charm! I just prop the bottle in his mouth and he is sleeping within 10-15min.
As for CIO i would say its a bit early but I did do it at 4months when we transitioned him into the crib and it worked for us.


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## LisK

IMO 9 weeks is way too young to cry it out. Could you try wearing her? That would free up your hands...


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## happynewmom1

I would suggest wearing her too but if she is like my LO and hates it, that wouldn't really work. I can only have mine in a carrier for a short amount of time or if she is sleepy...otherwise she just cries in it and kind of defeats the purpose for me. But could be worth a try for you! I don't really know what to suggest...that sounds rough! I know my kid's doctor gave us the ok to try CIO with our first when he was 4 months old just because he was advanced for his age I guess but we didn't do it until later. 9 weeks does sound a bit young for it, but I do understand the frustrations with having 2 and how hard that would be! I would probably be considering something similar at this point as well. It might work to express and feed her a bottle or letting your DH try giving her a bottle might help make her a bit more independent. :shrug: :hugs:


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## Dk1234

Before I had a baby I would say go for it. But now my 8 week old seems so little for that.


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## MiniKiwi

Imo 9 weeks is way too young. I know it's hard right now but I couldn't leave my LO to CIO especially after my mum told me that letting my brother CIO is her biggest parenting regret. The sling is a great idea, hope you work it out :flower:


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## LegoHouse

My son is 9 weeks tomorrow and it would kill me for him to cry for a long time when I could fix it. I worry his little brain is going to explode lol


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## alaskagrown

I think it's too young. Lilly was the same way. She needed to be held 24/7 and has very little patience for carriers, but around the 3-month mark is when she finally started letting me put her on the floor with toys and entertain herself for a few minutes or put her in her bouncer chair and she'll contently watch me do chores. I seriously never thought I'd see the day I could free my arms for a few minutes!

Lilly does still fight sleep A LOT. If it gets really bad (as in she hasn't slept in 5 or 6+ hours) I just hold her to me tight in a dark room and rock her while she criiiiies her little heart out. It takes about 5-10 minutes of really heavy sobbing before she passes out..and she passes out HARD!


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## Linzi_x

I think 9 weeks is too young for cry it out. I would wait a few more weeks until she's atleast 3 months old. I was told by my health visitor to lay LO down drowsy then let her cry for 5 minutes and if she hasn't stopped go upstairs and calm her down then put LO back and let her cry for 5 minutes etc. until she stops. I'm going to be doing this with Francesca but I'm going to wait. when they're this age they cry for a reason, not for attention so attend to their every need :)


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## Lulu1982

A swing worked for us in the early days, she loved the motion and would quite often drop off in there.x


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## honey08

my babies been like this since he was born ... hes 6mth now :wacko: i rock him 2sleep/nap , thro the day if i have to put him in a bouncer etc and hes moaning i will leave him so i can get something done x


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## Ozzieshunni

Even the "experts" don't recommend any sleep training until 6 months.

You really need to think of the first three months as a fourth trimester. Just think, your LO was safe and warm inside you and now they are out in the world. Of course they are going to want to be held! It's normal and natural. I also recommend a sling :) I used to also take Alex's bouncey chair into the bathroom with me while I showered. The sound of the water soothed him.


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## chrislo4

I agree with other ladies that 9 weeks is too young to let him CIO. Def try the sling idea though. My baby used to cry & scream every time i put her down but since i started combi feeding, i can put her down for longer periods. I guess the breast milk/formula mix is suiting her! We also have a swing which is fab. She LOVES it!! xx


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## Maviyildiz

Hi! I know how you feel. My lo is about the same age and she is a really bad sleeper. I have been up with her since 2:45 last night and she is the type who wont be worn and doesnt fall asleep in the swing. At week 9 i was considering cio too because i was desperate. i dont have another child but i am supposed to be working from home but i just cant yet. Luckily for me my mom said she'd fly over (i am an expat) so i can hang in there a little longer. Dont know what i would be doing if she wasnt coming. i want to wait for my lo to be as old as i can first, because it will be alot easier on her and i think more effective. I am afraid at this age they would just scream without learning anything and that would be alot of needless crying. Which brings me to my practical question i was going to raise. I am not a cio expert but intuitively it seems to me it may not be effective used only for naps on a baby that has never been night time sleep trained and is so young. They could easily scream right through nap time. At night we have our circadian rythms that tell us its time to sleep and that is like a tool for you and lo. Without having done that i am not sure how long it would take for them to understand its nap time? i could be wrong but something to consider before you go through with it. if at all possible i think youd have better luck if you waited till she was big and old enough for nigjt time traininh.


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## Ozzieshunni

^^You are absolutely right. I've heard of tons of women that have "sleep trained" and are now facing nighttime problems as their children become toddlers and young children. To me, it's not worth it and it should come naturally. Before I get bashed, I've had horrible nights with Alex. I've experienced sleep deprivation. Would I change how I do things for the next child? Not in a heartbeat. He's 14 months old and sleeps pretty much 10 hours at night.


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## Frooty

Baby wearing may be the easier option i think CIO shes a bit too young for shes still so little and wants her mummy a lot still


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## loving_life

My LO Is 9 weeks 5 days, I couldn't let her CIO it would break my heart. Way way way too young. It breaks my heart when she screams when I'm driving and she's in the back in the car seat & I can't do anything for her. 
My LO is the same, I'd suggest wearing her. I tried with my LO but she hates it o I have to just stick it out. As long as my little girl is happy, nt gonna lie though it's a pain in the arse lol.


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## candyem

Have you tried white noise? We left my phone in his Moses basket playing white noise and it helped him sleep a bit longer. Might be worth a try if you haven't already :)


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## eulmh82

I personally don;t think a 9 week old is capable of understanding that. I'm not necessarily against cc but I've not had to try it yet and we'll see if it;;s something i can do but I always thought it was more for toddlers who are just being a bit stubborn - like me as a child! :) Could you perhaps try having her in her crib but holding her hand or putting your hand on her tummy? My friend tried this as her LO is the same she slowly put him down but kept contact with him at all times and kept rubbing his tummy and singing and eventually she was able to come away - it does take time though - I think she was doing it for half an hour or so


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## beth_terri

edited for those who couldn't understand my point
Rather than CIO, You could try leaving her for just a few minutes to see if she will settle. I know sometimes when I'm hanging washing or whatever mine will start to cry, I refuse to drop everything to go settle him (hes not crying his heart out or anything, more winging), when I'm done he will be asleep. If he was to start getting upset I'd obviously go to him. But because I know he's simply after attention and he won't cry/Witter for long I feel ok leaving him for those few mins. At the end of the day I too have a 3 year old and am on my own with them Monday to Friday. I simply cannot run to him every time he winges. And the crying I'm talking about is not even as bad as when I do his nappy.

Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry (not cry it out, but cry)
X


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## lozzy21

No, your baby is far to young. That young they can't understand you need to see your 3 year all she knows is you have put her down so you have abandoned her. She relies on you for everything, warmth, food, comfort and with out you the world is a scary place. 

Get yourself a proper sling so you can be hands free for your 3 year old.


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## charleosgirl

Too young for cio, I'd try white noise as another poster suggested.x


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## SabrinaKat

I wouldn't recommend CIO or CC at such a young age; most doctors recommend waiting perhaps until LO is at least 6 months+ (personally, I don't agree with CIO or CC at all, but obviously, LOs do cry and sometimes, it is hard to immediately get to them!/at least with your older child, you can at least try to reason with them!). I'd recommend white noise (we have a sleep sheep which does white noise either 23 or 45 minutes, perhaps using a sleeping bag (we swaddled the lower body until he was about 5 months+, then easily switched to a sleep sack) and perhaps introducing a routine, e.g. bath, walking with LO and trying (gently) to persuade LO towards sleep....

best wishes


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## Ozzieshunni

beth_terri said:


> *You could try it. She may not cry for long.* I know sometimes when I'm hanging washing or whatever mine will start to cry, I refuse to drop everything to go settle him (hes not crying his heart out or anything, more winging), when I'm done he will be asleep. If he was to start getting upset I'd obviously go to him. But because I know he's simply after attention and he won't cry/Witter for long I feel ok leaving him for those few mins. At the end of the day I too have a 3 year old and am on my own with them Monday to Friday. I simply cannot run to him every time he winges.
> 
> *Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry*
> X

I would never let any of my children just cry nor would I suggest to any mother that she even try it at nine weeks old. There is a vast difference between a whinge and a cry. Also, I'm sorry, but no nine week old simply cries for attention. I hate to pick apart your post, but in the context of what OP is asking, everything you have suggested is not right for the age of this child.


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## shorman

I think 9 weeks is to early Hun my boy hated me putting him down always liked being held and unfortunately sling didn't work because of my back so I found he loved white noise so try putting on the Hoover also I found he adores being in the kitchen when the wasting machine or tumble dryers on, I also bought a great little music box that gives of soothing sounds like dolphins or birds a gentle classical music which works wonders


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## Noelle610

I don't think a 9 week old is developmentally capable of understanding anything sleep training such as CIO aims to teach. They can't really self-settle or "understand" that you need some time away from them. I do feel for you... my LO was a horrible sleeper until just recently and we still have very difficult nights. I can only imagine feeling so sleep deprived with a toddler!

I think the suggestions for a sling are good. A swing also worked wonders for us! I would also gently try to transition LO to being on his own. I would pop Charlotte in her bouncy seat or on her play mat and just sit there with her. I also would place her in her crib, turn on the mobile and "play" with her so that she could get used to it as a "fun" place. Now she's fine to be on her own for longer stretches.

I hope that helps -- good luck!


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## chell5544

Ozzieshunni said:


> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> *You could try it. She may not cry for long.* I know sometimes when I'm hanging washing or whatever mine will start to cry, I refuse to drop everything to go settle him (hes not crying his heart out or anything, more winging), when I'm done he will be asleep. If he was to start getting upset I'd obviously go to him. But because I know he's simply after attention and he won't cry/Witter for long I feel ok leaving him for those few mins. At the end of the day I too have a 3 year old and am on my own with them Monday to Friday. I simply cannot run to him every time he winges.
> 
> *Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry*
> X
> 
> I would never let any of my children just cry nor would I suggest to any mother that she even try it at nine weeks old. There is a vast difference between a whinge and a cry. Also, I'm sorry, but no nine week old simply cries for attention. I hate to pick apart your post, but in the context of what OP is asking, everything you have suggested is not right for the age of this child.Click to expand...


I would have to agree with Beth here I have a 3 and half year old and a 5 week old and sometimes it's not possible to simply drop everything and go to my 5 week end my partner works long hours and the bedtimes are down to me I would never let my baby get hesterical but there have been times when I've been finishing dinner or hanging washing up and my baby has starting crying because she wants a cuddle and I've let her whine until u finish and a lot of the time I go in and she has fallen back asleep 
I don't think this makes me a bad mum and it's not doing her any harm I'm not saying I wouldnt CIO to sleep train at such a young age but sometimes if you just leave them for 5 mins they can stop crying on their own 

Personally I don't think it does any harm letting your baby whine for a couple of minutes while you go toilet or put a wash on


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## Ozzieshunni

I still disagree. It is very possible to respond to the needs of both children at once. I know many moms on the AP group that do it without issue.


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## Dragonfly

I never left either of mine to cry I had my oldest help me out and included him. I assume poster is a single mum or something that dad cant take either child, its not always easy but its doable there are ways you can avoid it. I havnt read all the thread. You could get a sling and include your 9 week old in what you are doing. Less stress all round then.


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## Jem88

Sophie was held/rocked and then slept on me alot of the time until she was around 3 months but i know this time that won't be possible with a toddler so I'm hoping the baby will sleep in a sling/baby carrier so she still feels close to me and i can still do things with Sophie. Sophie also slept well when she was swaddled at night, not sure if you've tried this. x


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## Natasha2605

There's MASSIVE difference between allowing your baby to whinge while you pee, take something out of the oven or finish tending to your toddler and allowing them to CIO for naps.

At nine weeks it's so not right to make a baby CIO. I've been there with a newborn and a demanding toddler, Maci was the ultimate screamer until she was about four months. You've just gotta plod on doing what your doing the best you can until your baby is ready to not need you so much. They all get there eventually.


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## Aidan's Mummy

9 weeks is way to young for CIO they say the youngest you can start is 6 months. At 9 weeks they want to be close and they need that IMO. They have been in the womb for 9 months and they are used to feeling close to you. Have you ever thought of a sling? Ollie hates being put down sometimes and if I have things to do I just put him in the sling and get on with it. I have even done my housework with him in it :) I also have a 3 year old so I know it can be hard :hugs:

I use the moby wrap https://www.mobywrap.com/

but the mei tai is also very good and great for beginners https://www.meitaibaby.com/ xx


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## Aidan's Mummy

Ozzieshunni said:


> I still disagree. It is very possible to respond to the needs of both children at once. I know many moms on the AP group that do it without issue.

Agreed! I have been rocking Ollie to sleep while reading Aidan a bedtime story. x


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## mrsthomas623

Hey hun.

While I agree with 9 weeks being too young to CIO, please don't break your back trying to be supermom. :hugs: When I only had Nolan, he never had to cry, I could always immediately respond to him- it wasn't an issue. Now with 2 so close in age- they both have to cry a little sometimes, I am only one person. Sometimes Nolan has to cry because he is upset while I feed Griffin. Sometimes Griffin has to cry because I am making Nolan's lunch or dinner. That's life.

I will say I don't think I could have survived those first few months with out my Moby wrap and their swing. You do whatever you can to make it work. :) It will get better, right now Nolan is playing with his trucks and Griffin is in his exersaucer- I actually had a moment to get on the desktop to reply to this! :dance:


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## chell5544

Aidan's Mummy said:


> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> I still disagree. It is very possible to respond to the needs of both children at once. I know many moms on the AP group that do it without issue.
> 
> Agreed! I have been rocking Ollie to sleep while reading Aidan a bedtime story. xClick to expand...

most of the time i do agree but my 3 year is still getting used to her sister being around and the only mummy time she gets these days is her bedtime story and me to lay down with her for three minutes so for me personally i will give her that and wont deny her those 5 minutes a day which is just me and her so yes i will let my baby cry for those 5 minutes 
i dont think anyone is saying let her CIO to train sleep but dont think anyone should be made to feel bad about leaving a baby to cry for 5 minutes to tend to your older child or even go outside and have a cup of tea and have 5 minutes to yourself


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## special_kala

9 weeks old is far far far too young to even consider CIO.

I have 2 children and was a single parent from when Willow was 10 weeks old and she was never left to cry, nor was River.

Its bloody hard work but ignoring a crying baby is not the route to go down.

Please ignore anyone who suggests its a ok to do your baby NEEDS you for everything, they are completely Dependant on you. 

If you leave a baby to cry like that as far as they are concerned you have abandoned them and they shut up because its better for their surival to shut up conserve energy and hope someone comes.


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## Mummy Bean

i say try:
-a sling/carrier
- a swing to give ur arms a break
- moses basket that on a rocker
- white noise
-co sleeping at night

hope things get better soon. x


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## sandilion

if i was in your situation i would definitely get a sling or something of that nature. 9 weeks is too early for CIO imo. I wouldn't personally rule out a gentle version of self settling encouragement, as babies do cry when they are actually falling asleep. And they even can cry during their sleep. Its so hard to tell when they are that young. In fact i still find it hard at times with my LO now - he'll start to cry, ill run into the room and he will be fast asleep again within 10 seconds of crying.... so sometimes when we run over and pick them up it can actually disturb them. I was taught this by a baby sleep consultant I was recommended to see when my LO was only about 2 months old. Little did i know that all my fussing and worrying and picking him up all the time was causing him to become very over tired and over stimulated.

It's tough though when they are so young. I personally let my LO sleep on me for a lot of the time for the first 2-3 months - but then i was taught some techniques to encourage him to self settle himself and it really worked amazingly. He has been a fantastic sleeper ever since. I don't leave him to cry, but i will go to him and help him settle down then put him back to bed and leave the room. It can be hard work in the beginning... but it pays off. It's all about persisting to help them sleep.

Otherwise if your LO just seems like they need to be held, your gut will tell you when that is the case so that's when you pop them in the sling and let them fall asleep close to you.

This is how i have done things anyways. I even as instructed, did a gentle version of CC with my LO when he was from 4 months onwards and he is a very happy well rested smiley thriving baby.

I also don't want anyone here to pick at my post. Im here to discuss this with the OP, not get into any arguments or debates. All babies are different and i am just going by what has worked well for mine. I haven't read any of the other replies as i just wanted to add my 2c.


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## baby_mama87

I personally wouldnt as I can't leave my LO cry it breaks my heart, you would probably find you would feel the same too I think it's against our instincts to leave a little baby cry. I think it's fine if people want to do it after the recommended age but I would hang on a while yet. My LO will only sleep in his bouncy chair now! He loves it maybe try that and rocking it with your foot or buy a sling/carrier and wear LO. 

Xxx


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## sandilion

Just a tip i learned also which has helped me a LOT, if you are trying to get your baby to settle and they just aren't, step outside with them - the instant fresh air and change of environment generally settles them right down. :) It distracts them.


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## Emzywemzy

I think there is a huge difference between CIO and leaving your child for a few minutes whilst you are seeing to another child/pegging out the last 2 bits of laundry/answering the door. The latter is done out of necessity, where CIO is a choice. Personally, I think 9 weeks is too young for CIO. I believe that even the people that recommend it suggest that you don't do it until at least 6 months (Some say 9 months) as they are too young to understand before then. Young babies need to be close to their Mums and don't have the ability to cry for 'attention' or anything like that. I have a baby and a 2 year old and although there are times where I have no choice but to leave Evie to cry if I am doing something with Holly (ie changing her nappy) I would never choose to leave her to cry. I can see to both at once and if Evie is having a grouchy day (which isn't often to be fair!) I pop her in the carrier and she's happy and I can carry on with whatever I was doing.

I know it's difficult though, my first was like that, never wanted to be put down, would only be rocked to sleep etc. The swing was a LIVESAVER! I used to pop her in that for her naps. Failing that I'd use a carrier and that would soothe her. She outgrew it at 6 months and has self settled and slept 12+ hours a night ever since, so the people who told me I was making a rod for my own back were talking rubbish!

You could always try to put her down first and see if she will settle, but then pick her back up again if she doesn't? You never know, one day she may surprise you :)

In short, if it feels wrong to you, then it probably is. Whilst babies are little there is no harm in holding/carrying them all the time, they'll grow out of it :) x


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## lhancock90

Ozzieshunni said:


> I still disagree. It is very possible to respond to the needs of both children at once. I know many moms on the AP group that do it without issue.

& plenty Moms in general. Not just AP. 



Natasha2605 said:


> There's MASSIVE difference between allowing your baby to whinge while you pee, take something out of the oven or finish tending to your toddler and allowing them to CIO for naps.

Exactly. 2/3 minutes fine. 15/20+ never. 



beth_terri said:


> Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry

I'm a second time Mum and i still wouldn't leave a 9 week old to CIO. 

OP; there are alternatives. Try a sling. 9 weeks is far to early to be CIO for extended periods of time. Never before 6 months. Hope you manage to get through it! x


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## chell5544

lhancock90 said:


> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> I still disagree. It is very possible to respond to the needs of both children at once. I know many moms on the AP group that do it without issue.
> 
> & plenty Moms in general. Not just AP.
> 
> never said their arent people that can however i dont think people should be made to feel bad by finishing off their older 1 lunch before attending to their baby
> 
> 
> 
> Natasha2605 said:
> 
> 
> There's MASSIVE difference between allowing your baby to whinge while you pee, take something out of the oven or finish tending to your toddler and allowing them to CIO for naps.Click to expand...
> 
> Exactly. 2/3 minutes fine. 15/20+ never.
> 
> yes noone has said let the baby cry for 15+ mins
> 
> 
> 
> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cryClick to expand...
> 
> I'm a second time Mum and i still wouldn't leave a 9 week old to CIO.
> 
> Noone has said leave a 9 week old to CIO just dont feel like you have to run straight to your baby if your doing the washing up as some women have said if your dont attend to your baby imedently then your baby will feel like you have abandoned them and the only reason the baby might stop crying is because its their survial instinct kicking in to save energy in the hope someone comes.
> 
> No mother should be made to feel like their baby feels abandoned especially by another motherClick to expand...


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## whit.

lhancock90 said:


> I'm a second time Mum and i still wouldn't leave a 9 week old to CIO.




chell5544 said:


> Noone has said leave a 9 week old to CIO


Isn't that the point of the thread? OP was told she should let her 9 week old CIO?

OP, I agree with others. I would get a sling or a wrap and carry your LO around while taking care of things you need to do and your older child. A 9 week old doesn't know any better and they need their mother just as much as an older child does. Why should either child be put on the back burner while taking care of the other one?


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## Ozzieshunni

whit. said:


> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> I'm a second time Mum and i still wouldn't leave a 9 week old to CIO.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> chell5544 said:
> 
> 
> Noone has said leave a 9 week old to CIOClick to expand...
> 
> *
> 
> Isn't that the point of the thread? OP was told she should let her 9 week old CIO?*
> 
> OP, I agree with others. I would get a sling or a wrap and carry your LO around while taking care of things you need to do and your older child. A 9 week old doesn't know any better and they need their mother just as much as an older child does. Why should either child be put on the back burner while taking care of the other one?Click to expand...

Oh good! I thought my vision had gone :haha:


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## Natasha2605

chell5544 said:


> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> I still disagree. It is very possible to respond to the needs of both children at once. I know many moms on the AP group that do it without issue.
> 
> & plenty Moms in general. Not just AP.
> 
> never said their arent people that can however i dont think people should be made to feel bad by finishing off their older 1 lunch before attending to their baby
> 
> 
> 
> Natasha2605 said:
> 
> 
> There's MASSIVE difference between allowing your baby to whinge while you pee, take something out of the oven or finish tending to your toddler and allowing them to CIO for naps.Click to expand...
> 
> Exactly. 2/3 minutes fine. 15/20+ never.
> 
> yes noone has said let the baby cry for 15+ mins
> 
> 
> 
> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cryClick to expand...
> 
> I'm a second time Mum and i still wouldn't leave a 9 week old to CIO.
> 
> Noone has said leave a 9 week old to CIO just dont feel like you have to run straight to your baby if your doing the washing up as some women have said if your dont attend to your baby imedently then your baby will feel like you have abandoned them and the only reason the baby might stop crying is because its their survial instinct kicking in to save energy in the hope someone comes.
> 
> No mother should be made to feel like their baby feels abandoned especially by another motherClick to expand...
> 
> 
> Er the whole thread was about leaving your 9 week old to cry... in case I missed something?!
> 
> A 9 week old DOES feel abandoned. Doesn't matter how you look at it it does, what else could it possibly think? It hardly has the mental mentality to rationally think out scenarios as to why mum isn't coming. They don't understand it's because it's nap time so time to sleep. Absolutely no way.Click to expand...


----------



## jenniferttc1

My baby was the same way until just a few days ago once he could move around on his own and sit too. Hang in there. Some babies just don't enjoy being still and content. Some are ready to move from the begining I believe, but they can't and it makes them angry! 
9 weeks is WAY too young for CIO. 6 months minimume.


----------



## chell5544

Natasha2605 said:


> chell5544 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> I still disagree. It is very possible to respond to the needs of both children at once. I know many moms on the AP group that do it without issue.
> 
> & plenty Moms in general. Not just AP.
> 
> never said their arent people that can however i dont think people should be made to feel bad by finishing off their older 1 lunch before attending to their baby
> 
> 
> 
> Natasha2605 said:
> 
> 
> There's MASSIVE difference between allowing your baby to whinge while you pee, take something out of the oven or finish tending to your toddler and allowing them to CIO for naps.Click to expand...
> 
> Exactly. 2/3 minutes fine. 15/20+ never.
> 
> yes noone has said let the baby cry for 15+ mins
> 
> 
> 
> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cryClick to expand...
> 
> I'm a second time Mum and i still wouldn't leave a 9 week old to CIO.
> 
> Noone has said leave a 9 week old to CIO just dont feel like you have to run straight to your baby if your doing the washing up as some women have said if your dont attend to your baby imedently then your baby will feel like you have abandoned them and the only reason the baby might stop crying is because its their survial instinct kicking in to save energy in the hope someone comes.
> 
> No mother should be made to feel like their baby feels abandoned especially by another motherClick to expand...
> 
> 
> Er the whole thread was about leaving your 9 week old to cry... in case I missed something?!
> 
> A 9 week old DOES feel abandoned. Doesn't matter how you look at it it does, what else could it possibly think? It hardly has the mental mentality to rationally think out scenarios as to why mum isn't coming. They don't understand it's because it's nap time so time to sleep. Absolutely no way.Click to expand...
> 
> I never said you should leave your 9 week to CIO I said sometimes its not possible to attend to a crying baby straight away for instant I'm cooking dinner my 5 week old wakes up crying she's hungry so I finish preparing dinner and do her a bottle ( my LO has to be over the shoulder with her bum tapped to be settled) I can't do this all at the same what else can I do but let her cry for 5 mins then I will go get her and feed her
> I don't see how this is abandoning your baby
> I was just saying if the sling doesn work or your doing your older child's lunch in my PO you will not do your baby any harm
> 
> I wonder if people would comment the same if I made a post saying I'm feeling over whelmed and very emotional is it ok to leave my baby crying for 5 mins while I take a quick showerClick to expand...


----------



## whit.

But like others have said, a few minutes is much different than CIO.


----------



## special_kala

CIO is leaving your baby with of aim of them going to sleep.

Leaving your baby grumble for a few minutes is not CIO

I dont understand why people get so defensive about something that isnt directed at them


----------



## Natasha2605

chell5544 said:


> Natasha2605 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> chell5544 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> I still disagree. It is very possible to respond to the needs of both children at once. I know many moms on the AP group that do it without issue.
> 
> & plenty Moms in general. Not just AP.
> 
> never said their arent people that can however i dont think people should be made to feel bad by finishing off their older 1 lunch before attending to their baby
> 
> 
> 
> Natasha2605 said:
> 
> 
> There's MASSIVE difference between allowing your baby to whinge while you pee, take something out of the oven or finish tending to your toddler and allowing them to CIO for naps.Click to expand...
> 
> Exactly. 2/3 minutes fine. 15/20+ never.
> 
> yes noone has said let the baby cry for 15+ mins
> 
> 
> 
> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cryClick to expand...
> 
> I'm a second time Mum and i still wouldn't leave a 9 week old to CIO.
> 
> Noone has said leave a 9 week old to CIO just dont feel like you have to run straight to your baby if your doing the washing up as some women have said if your dont attend to your baby imedently then your baby will feel like you have abandoned them and the only reason the baby might stop crying is because its their survial instinct kicking in to save energy in the hope someone comes.
> 
> No mother should be made to feel like their baby feels abandoned especially by another motherClick to expand...
> 
> 
> Er the whole thread was about leaving your 9 week old to cry... in case I missed something?!
> 
> A 9 week old DOES feel abandoned. Doesn't matter how you look at it it does, what else could it possibly think? It hardly has the mental mentality to rationally think out scenarios as to why mum isn't coming. They don't understand it's because it's nap time so time to sleep. Absolutely no way.Click to expand...
> 
> I never said you should leave your 9 week to CIO I said sometimes its not possible to attend to a crying baby straight away for instant I'm cooking dinner my 5 week old wakes up crying she's hungry so I finish preparing dinner and do her a bottle ( my LO has to be over the shoulder with her bum tapped to be settled) I can't do this all at the same what else can I do but let her cry for 5 mins then I will go get her and feed her
> I don't see how this is abandoning your baby
> I was just saying if the sling doesn work or your doing your older child's lunch in my PO you will not do your baby any harm
> 
> I wonder if people would comment the same if I made a post saying I'm feeling over whelmed and very emotional is it ok to leave my baby crying for 5 mins while I take a quick showerClick to expand...
> 
> Your getting the wrong end of the stick here. I've already said there's a difference between what you describe and CIO. I know what you mean, I'm there. Sometimes Maci have to gruzzle/ whinge for a few minutes whilst I do something else. That is not CIO.
> 
> You do CIO with a purpose. To get your baby to sleep. For a 9 week old that's incredibly wrong. THAT, to the baby, is abadonment, not what you described.Click to expand...


----------



## beth_terri

Ozzieshunni said:


> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> *You could try it. She may not cry for long.* I know sometimes when I'm hanging washing or whatever mine will start to cry, I refuse to drop everything to go settle him (hes not crying his heart out or anything, more winging), when I'm done he will be asleep. If he was to start getting upset I'd obviously go to him. But because I know he's simply after attention and he won't cry/Witter for long I feel ok leaving him for those few mins. At the end of the day I too have a 3 year old and am on my own with them Monday to Friday. I simply cannot run to him every time he winges.
> 
> *Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry*
> X
> 
> I would never let any of my children just cry nor would I suggest to any mother that she even try it at nine weeks old. There is a vast difference between a whinge and a cry. Also, I'm sorry, but no nine week old simply cries for attention. I hate to pick apart your post, but in the context of what OP is asking, everything you have suggested is not right for the age of this child.Click to expand...

Ok so I clearly wasn't specific enough in what I said. I'm not suggesting she leave a screaming baby to settle to sleep. I thought I made that clear. What I was meaning is that if she put her baby down whilst sorting out her older child she may find that the baby crys for a couple of mins but then nods off or at least stops crying. If you never try it to see if actually the baby does settle pretty quick and is just upset at that initial part of being put down, then you'll never know!! Of course if the baby didn't stop crying, winging she would go soothe her immediately. I used the hanging washing up as an example of this. He starts to cry winge but I don't go to him immediately and more often RGB not he's fallen asleep after a min or so. Also he cries worse when I change his nappy.

Now what I want to know is how you super mums cook hot food for your toddlers, then bath them, dry them etc etc without your baby ever crying in the process. Maybe I'm just a super bad mum but I don't have enough arms to hold a baby and bath a toddler. Because unfortunately Rory does from time to time start crying when I'm sorting my eldest. And again unfortunately I do have to leave him while I get him sorted. So for those of you who say you NEVER let your baby cry please please please tell me how do I do this? Here's another (now I'm sorry this is going off topic but I just need to know how you super mums do it) my baby doesn't like the car seat. He screams the car down. So am I a bad mum because I don't stop the car every 2 seconds to try stop him crying?


----------



## lhancock90

Where did i say anyone had abandoned their baby?
I said, i'm a second time Mom and i wouldn't do it.
Simple.
I wish people would properly read what i said before pouncing on it.


----------



## LittleBoo

beth_terri said:


> *Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry*
> X

How wrong you are :lol: most of my friends are slightly older, with 4+ little ones, none of them would ever leave their babies (or anyone elses for that matter) to cry it out. I'm talking, 4 little ones at once, ranging newborn to 5, plus school age kids, the housework that comes with having such a large family plus a partner working full time to support said family... quite a number of them have illness/disabilities alongside that come to think of it. After seeing these ladies go about their business for a day, I couldn't possibly complain I've got my hands full :haha:


----------



## special_kala

beth_terri said:


> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> *You could try it. She may not cry for long.* I know sometimes when I'm hanging washing or whatever mine will start to cry, I refuse to drop everything to go settle him (hes not crying his heart out or anything, more winging), when I'm done he will be asleep. If he was to start getting upset I'd obviously go to him. But because I know he's simply after attention and he won't cry/Witter for long I feel ok leaving him for those few mins. At the end of the day I too have a 3 year old and am on my own with them Monday to Friday. I simply cannot run to him every time he winges.
> 
> *Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry*
> X
> 
> I would never let any of my children just cry nor would I suggest to any mother that she even try it at nine weeks old. There is a vast difference between a whinge and a cry. Also, I'm sorry, but no nine week old simply cries for attention. I hate to pick apart your post, but in the context of what OP is asking, everything you have suggested is not right for the age of this child.Click to expand...
> 
> Ok so I clearly wasn't specific enough in what I said. I'm not suggesting she leave a screaming baby to settle to sleep. I thought I made that clear. What I was meaning is that if she put her baby down whilst sorting out her older child she may find that the baby crys for a couple of mins but then nods off or at least stops crying. If you never try it to see if actually the baby does settle pretty quick and is just upset at that initial part of being put down, then you'll never know!! Of course if the baby didn't stop crying, winging she would go soothe her immediately. I used the hanging washing up as an example of this. He starts to cry winge but I don't go to him immediately and more often RGB not he's fallen asleep after a min or so. Also he cries worse when I change his nappy.
> 
> *Now what I want to know is how you super mums cook hot food for your toddlers, then bath them, dry them etc etc without your baby ever crying in the process. Maybe I'm just a super bad mum but I don't have enough arms to hold a baby and bath a toddler. Because unfortunately Rory does from time to time start crying when I'm sorting my eldest. And again unfortunately I do have to leave him while I get him sorted. So for those of you who say you NEVER let your baby cry please please please tell me how do I do this? Here's another (now I'm sorry this is going off topic but I just need to know how you super mums do it) my baby doesn't like the car seat. He screams the car down. So am I a bad mum because I don't stop the car every 2 seconds to try stop him crying?*Click to expand...

Im getting really tired of all this "super mum" crap that comes out on threads like this. Did i ever say i was a super mum??? Nope. Did i say your a bad mum?? Nope.

Its really not that difficult to understand. I would never leave my baby to cry but of course that doesnt mean she never crys, of course she does shes a baby!

I waited until Willow was happy enough for me to cook, i wore her on my back, i cooked cold dinners and warm dinners when i could. She cried sometimes and i did my best to conole her, even if thats just talking to her telling her its ok im here. I didnt LEAVE her to cry alone with no comfort which is what CIO is.

an Yes i held Willow when bathing River although they generally bath together and im lucky to have 2 water babies. If not i held her and did everything else 1 handed.

Car seat again i console, i sing, i tell her shes going to be ok. She is not LEFT to cry alone and scared.

This thread is about CIO, systematically leaving your child to cry to gain something.


----------



## Ozzieshunni

I hate the super mom crap too.


----------



## Kristin52

9 weeks? Definitely not. Too young. Makes me sad picturing such a tiny baby crying and no one going for them.


----------



## beth_terri

special_kala said:


> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> *You could try it. She may not cry for long.* I know sometimes when I'm hanging washing or whatever mine will start to cry, I refuse to drop everything to go settle him (hes not crying his heart out or anything, more winging), when I'm done he will be asleep. If he was to start getting upset I'd obviously go to him. But because I know he's simply after attention and he won't cry/Witter for long I feel ok leaving him for those few mins. At the end of the day I too have a 3 year old and am on my own with them Monday to Friday. I simply cannot run to him every time he winges.
> 
> *Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry*
> X
> 
> I would never let any of my children just cry nor would I suggest to any mother that she even try it at nine weeks old. There is a vast difference between a whinge and a cry. Also, I'm sorry, but no nine week old simply cries for attention. I hate to pick apart your post, but in the context of what OP is asking, everything you have suggested is not right for the age of this child.Click to expand...
> 
> Ok so I clearly wasn't specific enough in what I said. I'm not suggesting she leave a screaming baby to settle to sleep. I thought I made that clear. What I was meaning is that if she put her baby down whilst sorting out her older child she may find that the baby crys for a couple of mins but then nods off or at least stops crying. If you never try it to see if actually the baby does settle pretty quick and is just upset at that initial part of being put down, then you'll never know!! Of course if the baby didn't stop crying, winging she would go soothe her immediately. I used the hanging washing up as an example of this. He starts to cry winge but I don't go to him immediately and more often RGB not he's fallen asleep after a min or so. Also he cries worse when I change his nappy.
> 
> *Now what I want to know is how you super mums cook hot food for your toddlers, then bath them, dry them etc etc without your baby ever crying in the process. Maybe I'm just a super bad mum but I don't have enough arms to hold a baby and bath a toddler. Because unfortunately Rory does from time to time start crying when I'm sorting my eldest. And again unfortunately I do have to leave him while I get him sorted. So for those of you who say you NEVER let your baby cry please please please tell me how do I do this? Here's another (now I'm sorry this is going off topic but I just need to know how you super mums do it) my baby doesn't like the car seat. He screams the car down. So am I a bad mum because I don't stop the car every 2 seconds to try stop him crying?*Click to expand...
> 
> Im getting really tired of all this "super mum" crap that comes out on threads like this. Did i ever say i was a super mum??? Nope. Did i say your a bad mum?? Nope.
> 
> Its really not that difficult to understand. I would never leave my baby to cry but of course that doesnt mean she never crys, of course she does shes a baby!
> 
> I waited until Willow was happy enough for me to cook, i wore her on my back, i cooked cold dinners and warm dinners when i could. She cried sometimes and i did my best to conole her, even if thats just talking to her telling her its ok im here. I didnt LEAVE her to cry alone with no comfort which is what CIO is.
> 
> an Yes i held Willow when bathing River although they generally bath together and im lucky to have 2 water babies. If not i held her and did everything else 1 handed.
> 
> Car seat again i console, i sing, i tell her shes going to be ok. She is not LEFT to cry alone and scared.
> 
> This thread is about CIO, systematically leaving your child to cry to gain something.Click to expand...

Yes but like everyone else I haven't said to actually do CIO have I. If instead of me writing 'you could try it', and instead I wrote 'you could try putting her down whilst you sort your toddler to see how she goes', would that have saved all this from happening?


----------



## beth_terri

LittleBoo said:


> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> *Ps I think its very easy for a first time mum to say they would never let a baby cry*
> X
> 
> How wrong you are :lol: most of my friends are slightly older, with 4+ little ones, none of them would ever leave their babies (or anyone elses for that matter) to cry it out. I'm talking, 4 little ones at once, ranging newborn to 5, plus school age kids, the housework that comes with having such a large family plus a partner working full time to support said family... quite a number of them have illness/disabilities alongside that come to think of it. After seeing these ladies go about their business for a day, I couldn't possibly complain I've got my hands full :haha:Click to expand...

Does the highlighted section say cry it out or just cry?? I dont put my baby down and expect him to cry it out. And if your telling me that women with 4 kids never let their kids cry, not cry it out but cry then all I can say is wow.


----------



## LittleBoo

Oi, enough sarcy arse :) I was trying to make light, guess it went WAYY over your head :lol: no, they never LEAVE their child to cry. Their children still cry, but they're never left to cry alone. Never ignored while more important business is attended to. They're worn, or held, or sang to, or spoken to.


----------



## LittleBoo

*might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!


----------



## lhancock90

LittleBoo said:


> *might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!

WSS.
If my kids are crying, nothing else is anywhere near as important.


----------



## beth_terri

lhancock90 said:


> LittleBoo said:
> 
> 
> *might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!
> 
> WSS.
> If my kids are crying, nothing else is anywhere near as important.Click to expand...

Well obviously I'm just terrible then aren't I. Because usually ill have Rory on his play gym while I bath Logan. If he starts to cry I'm afraid he waits until I've got Logan out of the bath until I pick him up. I assume you put your babies before your toddlers? Guess we all do things differently.


----------



## lhancock90

beth_terri said:


> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LittleBoo said:
> 
> 
> *might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!
> 
> WSS.
> If my kids are crying, nothing else is anywhere near as important.Click to expand...
> 
> Well obviously I'm just terrible then aren't I. Because usually ill have Rory on his play gym while I bath Logan. If he starts to cry I'm afraid he waits until I've got Logan out of the bath until I pick him up. I assume you put your babies before your toddlers? Guess we all do things differently.Click to expand...

What a massively wrong assumption. 
No i don't.
Its rare they cry together but if they do, i can console two children easily.
I wait till Ivys asleep/settled to bath Evelyn or encourage her to help out to keep her entertained.
Didn't say you were terrible, i simply said, if my children are crying thats more important than anything else.
I find ways around dealing with both.


----------



## special_kala

lhancock90 said:


> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LittleBoo said:
> 
> 
> *might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!
> 
> WSS.
> If my kids are crying, nothing else is anywhere near as important.Click to expand...
> 
> Well obviously I'm just terrible then aren't I. Because usually ill have Rory on his play gym while I bath Logan. If he starts to cry I'm afraid he waits until I've got Logan out of the bath until I pick him up. I assume you put your babies before your toddlers? Guess we all do things differently.Click to expand...
> 
> What a massively wrong assumption.
> No i don't.
> Its rare they cry together but if they do, i can console two children easily.
> I wait till Ivys asleep/settled to bath Evelyn or encourage her to help out to keep her entertained.
> Didn't say you were terrible, i simply said, if my children are crying thats more important than anything else.
> I find ways around dealing with both.Click to expand...


:thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:


----------



## AngelUK

I think this is getting into splitting hair and the meaning of what consists of letting and leaving. As a harrassed mum or twins I would like to say that I don't just leave either of my boys to cry and certainly never leave them to CIO. But sometimes I have to let them cry for a bit cause while nothing is as important as my boys, I am not prepared to get up from the loo midstream or mid... other and run to them spraying or... other :haha: Or when there is a delivery at the door I do go even if my boys are then crying for a moment while I deal with the man wanting a signature. So I think leaving them to cry for a moment while dealing with stuff does happen and who ever says it doesn't cannot be totally truthful. :flower:


----------



## lhancock90

AngelUK said:


> I think this is getting into splitting hair and the meaning of what consists of letting and leaving. As a harrassed mum or twins I would like to say that I don't just leave either of my boys to cry and certainly never leave them to CIO. But sometimes I have to let them cry for a bit cause while nothing is as important as my boys, I am not prepared to get up from the loo midstream or mid... other and run to them spraying or... other :haha: Or when there is a delivery at the door I do go even if my boys are then crying for a moment while I deal with the man wanting a signature. So I think leaving them to cry for a moment while dealing with stuff does happen and who ever says it doesn't cannot be totally truthful. :flower:

This is where the misunderstanding is coming in, we aren't saying our kids never cry, but were saying when we do, we go to them. Of course my kids cry, Ivy cries for a few minutes whilst i sort her bottle etc but i don't leave her to cry if that makes sense.


----------



## Brookey

beth_terri said:


> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LittleBoo said:
> 
> 
> *might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!
> 
> WSS.
> If my kids are crying, nothing else is anywhere near as important.Click to expand...
> 
> Well obviously I'm just terrible then aren't I. Because usually ill have Rory on his play gym while I bath Logan. If he starts to cry I'm afraid he waits until I've got Logan out of the bath until I pick him up. I assume you put your babies before your toddlers? Guess we all do things differently.Click to expand...

I think they mean that if they are bathing their toddler and their baby starts to cry then they will talk to/sing to the baby so that the baby doesnt feel totally alone. I dont think they mean that they will leave their toddler to their own devices whilst they rock their baby.

The whole meaning of crying it out, is to leave the baby to cry usually on their own.

What I think these ladies are saying (correct me if i'm wrong ladies) is that of course their babies cry but as long as they can talk to them or sing to them then the babies are not alone, therefore not crying it out.

Sorry if thats totally wrong but as someone reading through the thread I can see that wires are getting crossed all over the place.


----------



## Emzywemzy

I don't find I have to put either child before the other.... I'm no supermum but I manage? Of course Evie cries sometimes and if I'm in the middle of seeing to Holly then I'd finish what I was doing then go see to her. Unless she was really upset, at which point I'd decide what the safest thing to do was. But tbh those times are few and far between. I bathe them together, etc to avoid those times. But all this aside, this thread is about CIO which is different from not being able to see to your baby right away because of an older sibling! CIO is leaving them to cry with the intention with them going to sleep. Which I'd never do, however old personally x


----------



## beth_terri

lhancock90 said:


> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LittleBoo said:
> 
> 
> *might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!
> 
> WSS.
> If my kids are crying, nothing else is anywhere near as important.Click to expand...
> 
> Well obviously I'm just terrible then aren't I. Because usually ill have Rory on his play gym while I bath Logan. If he starts to cry I'm afraid he waits until I've got Logan out of the bath until I pick him up. I assume you put your babies before your toddlers? Guess we all do things differently.Click to expand...
> 
> What a massively wrong assumption.
> No i don't.
> Its rare they cry together but if they do, i can console two children easily.
> I wait till Ivys asleep/settled to bath Evelyn or encourage her to help out to keep her entertained.
> Didn't say you were terrible, i simply said, if my children are crying thats more important than anything else.
> I find ways around dealing with both.Click to expand...

And i would do that if Rory slept at bath time. But unfortunately for the last 2 years I've had my toddler in a routine of bath at 6.30, bed 7. So I'm not going to all of a sudden change this routine to actually your bath is going to have to wait until Rory is sleeping (which isn't often during the day), so as I've said if he starts to cry he cries for those few mins until I've got Logan out. And as I also said he wouldn't be sobbing as if and when it comes to that my toddler does have to wait while I settle Rory. But hey, were never going to agree so why keep going round in circles.


----------



## beth_terri

Emzywemzy said:


> I don't find I have to put either child before the other.... I'm no supermum but I manage? Of course Evie cries sometimes and if I'm in the middle of seeing to Holly then I'd finish what I was doing then go see to her. Unless she was really upset, at which point I'd decide what the safest thing to do was. But tbh those times are few and far between. I bathe them together, etc to avoid those times. But all this aside, this thread is about CIO which is different from not being able to see to your baby right away because of an older sibling! CIO is leaving them to cry with the intention with them going to sleep. Which I'd never do, however old personally x

Thankyou. Thats the point I was trying to get across lol. And I have bathed my kids together twice but Rory always needs a feed after a bath so once I've got him out and dry, he cries for a bottle... But I still have Logan to get dried and dressed.


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## Dk1234

Thank goodness I just have the one child.


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## special_kala

beth_terri said:


> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LittleBoo said:
> 
> 
> *might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!
> 
> WSS.
> If my kids are crying, nothing else is anywhere near as important.Click to expand...
> 
> Well obviously I'm just terrible then aren't I. Because usually ill have Rory on his play gym while I bath Logan. If he starts to cry I'm afraid he waits until I've got Logan out of the bath until I pick him up. I assume you put your babies before your toddlers? Guess we all do things differently.Click to expand...
> 
> What a massively wrong assumption.
> No i don't.
> Its rare they cry together but if they do, i can console two children easily.
> I wait till Ivys asleep/settled to bath Evelyn or encourage her to help out to keep her entertained.
> Didn't say you were terrible, i simply said, if my children are crying thats more important than anything else.
> I find ways around dealing with both.Click to expand...
> 
> And i would do that if Rory slept at bath time. But unfortunately for the last 2 years I've had my toddler in a routine of bath at 6.30, bed 7. So I'm not going to all of a sudden change this routine to actually your bath is going to have to wait until Rory is sleeping (which isn't often during the day), so as I've said if he starts to cry he cries for those few mins until I've got Logan out. And as I also said he wouldn't be sobbing as if and when it comes to that my toddler does have to wait while I settle Rory. But hey, were never going to agree so why keep going round in circles.Click to expand...

Why are your trying to justify something you dont even do?


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## special_kala

beth_terri said:


> Emzywemzy said:
> 
> 
> I don't find I have to put either child before the other.... I'm no supermum but I manage? Of course Evie cries sometimes and if I'm in the middle of seeing to Holly then I'd finish what I was doing then go see to her. Unless she was really upset, at which point I'd decide what the safest thing to do was. But tbh those times are few and far between. I bathe them together, etc to avoid those times. But all this aside, this thread is about CIO which is different from not being able to see to your baby right away because of an older sibling! CIO is leaving them to cry with the intention with them going to sleep. Which I'd never do, however old personally x
> 
> Thankyou. Thats the point I was trying to get across lol. And I have bathed my kids together twice but Rory always needs a feed after a bath so once I've got him out and dry, he cries for a bottle... But I still have Logan to get dried and dressed.Click to expand...

I found a hooded towel helped with that. (like the beach ones that they wear) drys the older one while you see to baby then when their happy get older one dressed


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## beth_terri

special_kala said:


> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> beth_terri said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LittleBoo said:
> 
> 
> *might I add, though my life is far less hectic with just 2 manic children and a puppy the size of a large dog, no, I don't _leave_ the kids to cry while I 'deal' with stuff, I just manage. Strange but true!
> 
> WSS.
> If my kids are crying, nothing else is anywhere near as important.Click to expand...
> 
> Well obviously I'm just terrible then aren't I. Because usually ill have Rory on his play gym while I bath Logan. If he starts to cry I'm afraid he waits until I've got Logan out of the bath until I pick him up. I assume you put your babies before your toddlers? Guess we all do things differently.Click to expand...
> 
> What a massively wrong assumption.
> No i don't.
> Its rare they cry together but if they do, i can console two children easily.
> I wait till Ivys asleep/settled to bath Evelyn or encourage her to help out to keep her entertained.
> Didn't say you were terrible, i simply said, if my children are crying thats more important than anything else.
> I find ways around dealing with both.Click to expand...
> 
> And i would do that if Rory slept at bath time. But unfortunately for the last 2 years I've had my toddler in a routine of bath at 6.30, bed 7. So I'm not going to all of a sudden change this routine to actually your bath is going to have to wait until Rory is sleeping (which isn't often during the day), so as I've said if he starts to cry he cries for those few mins until I've got Logan out. And as I also said he wouldn't be sobbing as if and when it comes to that my toddler does have to wait while I settle Rory. But hey, were never going to agree so why keep going round in circles.Click to expand...
> 
> Why are your trying to justify something you dont even do?Click to expand...

No where have I said I agree with CIO if that's what you mean? I've said so many times that I wouldn't leave him to sob.


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## floofymad

I wouldn't do it. It breaks my heart to think of a baby crying and no one going to him/her... I'm pretty sure there's a page in 'the no cry sleep solution' where it describes what it would be like to be a baby and cry without anyone coming.... I nearly cried reading it.

That said, I know how hard it is looking after a baby who won't settle, and I only have 1 ! So I would suggest a sling, bouncer, swing or something like that. I've got an inflatable ring that LO sits up in which keeps her happy at the mo!


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## Annie77

If you aren't 100% comfortable with CIO or other methods - don't do them, go with your own instincts. I did many things with my babies that most mums on here wouldn't agree with but I felt right about doing them and had support of hubby and elder relations.

Due to longstanding back problems I never used a sling for any of my babies and NEVER rocked or cuddled to sleep. if they fell asleep on the breast, I would ruse them very slightly before laying them down. My babies also never slept in bed with me. On the occasions they were grizzly when going down for a sleep I would lay my hand on their tummy and pat until they calmed down then walk away, repeating this until they fell asleep. I also swaddled whenever they went for a sleep.

Whilst not everyone will approve of this hands-off approach, my babies self-settled a a very early age & I was able to lay them on floor, rocker etc and cook dinner etc.

Also - sounds common sense but remember that dinner can be cooked during their afternoon sleep rather than trying to cook a 5.30, holding a baby in sling etc. I remember a friend asking me to watch her baby from 5-530 to allow her to cook, ironically I had a baby the same age so nt sure how she thought I had the time?


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## bbyno1

I have only read the 1st page so just literally jumping in here.

I have a very fussy 6 month old and a very active 2 year old who seeks alot of attention still. I dont let Sophia 'cry it out' on purpose. I never put her down and walk away and think to myself 'i will leave her to CIO' iykwim?I hate seeing my babies cry. Of course they both do sometimes like all babies/toddlers but i do my best to avoid them getting upset.

I have found a sort of 'balance' now. In Sophias nap times i do i will tidy and get buggy ready for the day. After Aliyahs eaten breakfast she has fruit in a bowl,as shes eating that i will feed Sophia her breakfast. What im trying to say is i try to keep them both happy and busy at the same time so no1 feels left out or gets upset. They have a bath together. I will get Sophia dried and dressed,give her the bottle as OH does Aliyah the same thing.

I do carry Sophia around alot and do things 1 handed and yes it may be hard but it wont last forever. Shes okay at being put down at certain times of the day for short periods and at that point i spend time with Aliyah or do dinner etc. As i play with one i always include the other. I would rather struggle that way than putting her down to scream.

Somtimes Aliyah needs full attention like if i have to change her and clean her. At that point i put Sophia down. If she cries then it wont be for long and as soon as im done i attend to her.I somtimes feel guilty but i know for the rest of the day im so hands on with her so im fine with it really.

Sorry for the ramble!


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## .rollinn.

I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.


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## HellBunny

Too young, i don't agree with CIO whatever age. It is frustrating, my 2 year old can be jealous at times, and sometimes i have to leave my youngest a few seconds if something is wrong with my oldest etc. It doesn't last forever.
Situation depends with me, if i'm feeding my youngest and my oldest wants something but isn't upset, i distract him as best i can until i've fed him. If my oldest wants something, then i'm in the middle of it and my youngest starts to whinge, then i carry on for a minute, unless he was screaming/in pain or whatever.
Disagree with the poster above me, why is it better to start when they are young? I thought tending to a newborn when they need their mummy was nature?!


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## bbyno1

.rollinn. said:


> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.

When they are young is when they need comfort the most though? When they need mummy and daddy,when they need cuddles. When they need reasurrance.


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## pinklightbulb

When I have been really overwhelmed I've left Liam to cry for 5-10 mins while I step outside and calm myself. It's only me with any responsibility of Liam (OH doesn't "do" BF babies :dohh: ) so 100% of the time, I am dealing with him, with no help. Throw a toddler into the mix who I am also responsible for 99% of the time, and a baby who gets very unsettled very easily, and you have a very stressed Mummy who needs (not wants, needs) a few mins to get herself together after 4+ solid hours of screaming.

That said. I have never left him with the intention of falling asleep, just with the intention that when I have chilled out just a little, I will be in a better frame of mind to deal with him. I used CC on my oldest boy at 4mo and regret it, even though it worked for him and was really my only option. 9 weeks old is too small for deliberate self-settling techniques :hugs:


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## staralfur

.rollinn. said:


> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.

:dohh:


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## whit.

.rollinn. said:


> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.


Just curious if you've ever researched CIO?


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## Ozzieshunni

.rollinn. said:


> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.

Your advice is just shocking. I have no words.


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## aliss

I think the OP is just needing some info on how to balance, I don't think she's actually considering true CIO (although I'm sure the advice-giver is!). Obviously there are times when you can't rush to them (ie her 3 year old is in the bath), and that's fine. Or, you're going nuts and just feel like snapping - it's okay. It's safer. A sling, a swing, the "one arm", trying a few minutes to see if she'll settle... to me, that's logical. I don't think OP is interested in sleep training though, this is just about her not being an octopus!!


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## happynewmom1

pinklightbulb said:


> When I have been really overwhelmed I've left Liam to cry for 5-10 mins while I step outside and calm myself. It's only me with any responsibility of Liam (OH doesn't "do" BF babies :dohh: ) so 100% of the time, I am dealing with him, with no help. Throw a toddler into the mix who I am also responsible for 99% of the time, and a baby who gets very unsettled very easily, and you have a very stressed Mummy who needs (not wants, needs) a few mins to get herself together after 4+ solid hours of screaming.
> 
> That said. I have never left him with the intention of falling asleep, just with the intention that when I have chilled out just a little, I will be in a better frame of mind to deal with him. I used CC on my oldest boy at 4mo and regret it, even though it worked for him and was really my only option. 9 weeks old is too small for deliberate self-settling techniques :hugs:

Sometimes, it does get overwhelming. I go through this exactly as well! It is SO hard having 99% of the responsibility for 2 little beings one of whom doesn't like to sleep at night so not only do I go through the day exhausted, trying to split attention to both. Not that it doesn't have it's rewards but also challenges which is why I'm surprised by some of the responses to this thread. The OP asked for a chilled out thread to just get a little advice for a problem and a brought up a solution that she already seemed hesitant about anyway. She didn't say she actually DID leave her 9 week old to CIO, but just that it was one solution someone gave to her. I don't really agree with the solution myself, but I know that sometimes it IS nearly impossible to keep both kids happy at once. I've tried reading to my toddler while rocking my baby and she will just scream as she wants all of the attention and well...I can't give my full attention to both at one time. Like some of the other people here, I have had to let her cry for just a couple of minutes to use the restroom or make a quick sandwich but usually don't leave her there for too long. And I have been pretty lucky that she will let me put her down for naps, but if she didn't then I would have to find some sort of way to make sure I can also give my toddler what he needs as she hates carriers of any sort and just screams in the swing. 

Being a mom is a really hard job so I think we're all pretty super, but just do and see things a bit differently sometimes. :flower:


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## pinklightbulb

Oh definitely, if I didn't clear my head at times I don't know how I would get through the day. It's really hard some days.


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## meli1981

Ozzieshunni said:


> ^^You are absolutely right. I've heard of tons of women that have "sleep trained" and are now facing nighttime problems as their children become toddlers and young children. To me, it's not worth it and it should come naturally. Before I get bashed, I've had horrible nights with Alex. I've experienced sleep deprivation. Would I change how I do things for the next child? Not in a heartbeat. He's 14 months old and sleeps pretty much 10 hours at night.

i "sleep trained" my lo at nine months. she is now 18 months and sleeps from 6-7pm until 8-9am! she sleeps so well its amazing and i owe it all to teaching her to sleep on her own. its not always a bad thing, but it also depends on the temperment of the baby in question. i think nine weeks is to young though, ide wait until six months, just so that it sticks! to the op, if you feel comfortable bringing your lo in bed, ide do that, your lo might sleep fir longer stretches. if not white noise has also worked for us, a fan in the summer and a humidifyer un winter. good luck!


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## meli1981

pinklightbulb said:


> Oh definitely, if I didn't clear my head at times I don't know how I would get through the day. It's really hard some days.

i hear ya girl!


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## loving_life

pinklightbulb said:


> Oh definitely, if I didn't clear my head at times I don't know how I would get through the day. It's really hard some days.

I only have 1 baby and she is 10 weeks old but when she is having a bad day and is really grumpy, crying or rather, whining all the time I may need a few mins to myself just to stop myself getting overwhelmed and upset so I go make a good old cup of tea which only takes a few minutes but it helps me. 

I'm lucky that once my LO has fallen asleep on me, I can 9 times out of 10, put her down. I make a nest for her still as she's a little baby. 
So I can get some stuff done like get myself washed/dressed, grab some food for myself or of I'm really lucky, do a bit of housework lol. 
It's not always been like this for me though, she never used to like being put down and was always crying. Even when I held her. I literally just had to get on with it, hold her, rock her, nurse her, anything she wanted but now & then i needed a couple minutes to myself. 

OP - It does get better and I would also try co sleeping if I were you. I now do that with my LO and she's so much more content and. Has started STTN!


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## Ozzieshunni

meli1981 said:


> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> ^^You are absolutely right. I've heard of tons of women that have "sleep trained" and are now facing nighttime problems as their children become toddlers and young children. To me, it's not worth it and it should come naturally. Before I get bashed, I've had horrible nights with Alex. I've experienced sleep deprivation. Would I change how I do things for the next child? Not in a heartbeat. He's 14 months old and sleeps pretty much 10 hours at night.
> 
> i "sleep trained" my lo at nine months. she is now 18 months and sleeps from 6-7pm until 8-9am! she sleeps so well its amazing and i owe it all to teaching her to sleep on her own. its not always a bad thing, but it also depends on the temperment of the baby in question. i think nine weeks is to young though, ide wait until six months, just so that it sticks! to the op, if you feel comfortable bringing your lo in bed, ide do that, your lo might sleep fir longer stretches. if not white noise has also worked for us, a fan in the summer and a humidifyer un winter. good luck!Click to expand...

I guess my point is, I've never had to do any of that. I never had to teach Alex to self-settle. He learned it on his own, naturally, at 11 months :shrug:


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## lhancock90

.rollinn. said:


> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.

:dohh:



Dk1234 said:


> Thank goodness I just have the one child.

:haha:



Ozzieshunni said:


> meli1981 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> ^^You are absolutely right. I've heard of tons of women that have "sleep trained" and are now facing nighttime problems as their children become toddlers and young children. To me, it's not worth it and it should come naturally. Before I get bashed, I've had horrible nights with Alex. I've experienced sleep deprivation. Would I change how I do things for the next child? Not in a heartbeat. He's 14 months old and sleeps pretty much 10 hours at night.
> 
> i "sleep trained" my lo at nine months. she is now 18 months and sleeps from 6-7pm until 8-9am! she sleeps so well its amazing and i owe it all to teaching her to sleep on her own. its not always a bad thing, but it also depends on the temperment of the baby in question. i think nine weeks is to young though, ide wait until six months, just so that it sticks! to the op, if you feel comfortable bringing your lo in bed, ide do that, your lo might sleep fir longer stretches. if not white noise has also worked for us, a fan in the summer and a humidifyer un winter. good luck!Click to expand...
> 
> I guess my point is, I've never had to do any of that. I never had to teach Alex to self-settle. He learned it on his own, naturally, at 11 months :shrug:Click to expand...

Ozzie and I don't always agree, but i'm with her 100% here. I've never understood sleep training. Why do babies need to be trained to do something that will come to them naturally? Then again i hate seeing the words "baby" and "training" put together :thumbup:


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## .rollinn.

Ozzieshunni said:


> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> Your advice is just shocking. I have no words.Click to expand...

I'm sureeeeeee it is,i started doing CIO between 2-3 months and it worked very well for my LO he sleeps through the night every night now. I know plenty of moms that are trying to do CIO with their 8month old's and it's not working very good at all,with the same method. Remember now this is a forum where everyone's opinion should be respected there's a rule against it YOU KNOW. ; )


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## .rollinn.

whit. said:


> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> 
> Just curious if you've ever researched CIO?Click to expand...

I've been very successful with CIO,thanks though. From my opinion and what i've seen from friends LO's the older the baby gets the harder it is.


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## lhancock90

.rollinn. said:


> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> Your advice is just shocking. I have no words.Click to expand...
> 
> I'm sureeeeeee it is,i started doing CIO between 2-3 months and it worked very well for my LO he sleeps through the night every night now. I know plenty of moms that are trying to do CIO with their 8month old's and it's not working very good at all,with the same method. Remember now this is a forum where everyone's opinion should be respected there's a rule against it YOU KNOW. ; )Click to expand...

Did you research CIO in the slightest before you did it?
I never would use CIO i don't agree with it. But even those who advocate and recommend it say NEVER before 6 months. A baby younger than 6 months is crying for a reason.
Your advice is reckless and dangerous and quite frankly, i hope its ignored.


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## .rollinn.

lhancock90 said:


> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> Your advice is just shocking. I have no words.Click to expand...
> 
> I'm sureeeeeee it is,i started doing CIO between 2-3 months and it worked very well for my LO he sleeps through the night every night now. I know plenty of moms that are trying to do CIO with their 8month old's and it's not working very good at all,with the same method. Remember now this is a forum where everyone's opinion should be respected there's a rule against it YOU KNOW. ; )Click to expand...
> 
> Did you research CIO in the slightest before you did it?
> I never would use CIO i don't agree with it. But even those who advocate and recommend it say NEVER before 6 months. A baby younger than 6 months is crying for a reason.
> Your advice is reckless and dangerous and quite frankly, i hope its ignored.Click to expand...

I did research it before hand. I know what i'm doing with my child,i'm posting what worked for me and my opinion. Sure it's so dangerous when infact my child is sleeping way better than before whatever you say dear. : ) have a good day.


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## lhancock90

.rollinn. said:


> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> Your advice is just shocking. I have no words.Click to expand...
> 
> I'm sureeeeeee it is,i started doing CIO between 2-3 months and it worked very well for my LO he sleeps through the night every night now. I know plenty of moms that are trying to do CIO with their 8month old's and it's not working very good at all,with the same method. Remember now this is a forum where everyone's opinion should be respected there's a rule against it YOU KNOW. ; )Click to expand...
> 
> Did you research CIO in the slightest before you did it?
> I never would use CIO i don't agree with it. But even those who advocate and recommend it say NEVER before 6 months. A baby younger than 6 months is crying for a reason.
> Your advice is reckless and dangerous and quite frankly, i hope its ignored.Click to expand...
> 
> I did research it before hand. I know what i'm doing with my child,i'm posting what worked for me and my opinion. Sure it's so dangerous when infact my child is sleeping way better than before whatever you say dear. : ) have a good day.Click to expand...

You researched it and still decided it was okay before 6 months?
:dohh:
I give up.


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## .rollinn.

lhancock90 said:


> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lhancock90 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ozzieshunni said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> Your advice is just shocking. I have no words.Click to expand...
> 
> I'm sureeeeeee it is,i started doing CIO between 2-3 months and it worked very well for my LO he sleeps through the night every night now. I know plenty of moms that are trying to do CIO with their 8month old's and it's not working very good at all,with the same method. Remember now this is a forum where everyone's opinion should be respected there's a rule against it YOU KNOW. ; )Click to expand...
> 
> Did you research CIO in the slightest before you did it?
> I never would use CIO i don't agree with it. But even those who advocate and recommend it say NEVER before 6 months. A baby younger than 6 months is crying for a reason.
> Your advice is reckless and dangerous and quite frankly, i hope its ignored.Click to expand...
> 
> I did research it before hand. I know what i'm doing with my child,i'm posting what worked for me and my opinion. Sure it's so dangerous when infact my child is sleeping way better than before whatever you say dear. : ) have a good day.Click to expand...
> 
> You researched it and still decided it was okay before 6 months?
> :dohh:
> I give up.Click to expand...

I sure did,problem? I know what's best for MY baby.


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## Ozzieshunni

I wouldn't worry. Anyone with common sense will ignore that advice, hancock. How anyone can ignore a 2/3 month old crying is fully beyond me.


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## Brookey

Why do people get so upset about other peoples babies? OK so she let her young baby CIO....im sure shes a loving mum and im sure the baby is very happy...

Would I do it myself....No way! However, people on this forum need to start realising that people in this world parent very differently and although we may not agree, no amount of arguing over an internet forum is going to change how other people bring up their children.


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## .rollinn.

bbyno1 said:


> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> When they are young is when they need comfort the most though? When they need mummy and daddy,when they need cuddles. When they need reasurrance.Click to expand...

My baby always get's lots of comfort and love,but in some cases if LO isn't sleeping good at all they need a little help. My baby was upset before i did CIO,there was nothing wrong with my son when i did it except he needed just that SLEEP.


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## .rollinn.

Brookey said:


> Why do people get so upset about other peoples babies? OK so she let her young baby CIO....im sure shes a loving mum and im sure the baby is very happy...
> 
> Would I do it myself....No way! However, people on this forum need to start realising that people in this world parent very differently and although we may not agree, no amount of arguing over an internet forum is going to change how other people bring up their children.

Very well said hun x


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## lhancock90

Brookey said:


> Why do people get so upset about other peoples babies? OK so she let her young baby CIO....im sure shes a loving mum and im sure the baby is very happy...
> 
> Would I do it myself....No way! However, people on this forum need to start realising that people in this world parent very differently and although we may not agree, no amount of arguing over an internet forum is going to change how other people bring up their children.

She can do what she likes with her baby.
I object to her handing out potentially dangerous advice. :thumbup:


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## Natasha2605

.rollinn. said:


> bbyno1 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> When they are young is when they need comfort the most though? When they need mummy and daddy,when they need cuddles. When they need reasurrance.Click to expand...
> 
> My baby always get's lots of comfort and love,but in some cases if LO isn't sleeping good at all they need a little help. My baby was upset before i did CIO,there was nothing wrong with my son when i did it except he needed just that SLEEP.Click to expand...

I really wouldn't class that as helping them. My six month old is an atrocious sleeper and I'd rather have that than a night than of CIO, especially before six months.

I hope to god nobody takes your advice, it really really is not right. At such a young age as 2/3 months baby doesn't understand sleep and how easy it should be!


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## Ozzieshunni

Brookey said:


> Why do people get so upset about other peoples babies? OK so she let her young baby CIO....im sure shes a loving mum and im sure the baby is very happy...
> 
> Would I do it myself....No way! However, people on this forum need to start realising that people in this world parent very differently and although we may not agree, no amount of arguing over an internet forum is going to change how other people bring up their children.

While this may be true, Brookey, there is research stating that CIO should not be done before six months. I'm all for bringing up our children the way we want, but I simply cannot ignore the negative effects that CIO brings to children later in life. I'm sorry, I cannot.


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## .rollinn.

Natasha2605 said:


> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> bbyno1 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .rollinn. said:
> 
> 
> I don't think it's to young,it's better to start while they're young. So many people do it late and have a hard time.
> 
> When they are young is when they need comfort the most though? When they need mummy and daddy,when they need cuddles. When they need reasurrance.Click to expand...
> 
> My baby always get's lots of comfort and love,but in some cases if LO isn't sleeping good at all they need a little help. My baby was upset before i did CIO,there was nothing wrong with my son when i did it except he needed just that SLEEP.Click to expand...
> 
> I really wouldn't class that as helping them. My six month old is an atrocious sleeper and I'd rather have that than a night than of CIO, especially before six months.
> 
> *I hope to god nobody takes your advice, it really really is not right. At such a young age as 2/3 months baby doesn't understand sleep and how easy it should be!*Click to expand...

It's also not right to tell a mother on a mommy forum how she chooses to parent is not right. This is a support forum not a debate and argue forum. It worked for my son and that's all that matters. Nobody has to take my advice i stated what worked for my son very well and my humble opinion. That should be the end of it honestly.


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## Arcanegirl

ladies youve made your point, its up to each mother how they chose to raise their kids and whilst i agree with waiting after 6 months for any type of CC/CIO there is only so many times you can advise people. Theres no need to nitpick a persons parenting even if you disagree with it.

I think this thread is best closed now...


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