# still worrying at 21 weeks



## lauralora

hey girls felt like i needed to vist here tonight, im having a hormonal day and im not feeling well 

seems like even though im 21 weeks tommorrow and can feel my baby moving loads, i still obsess about going to the bathroom and seeing blood, or have thoughts about waking up in the night with a pool of blood around me, its so morbid i dont no why im thinking this way ... there just really bad worrys that i cant shake off. if i get increased discharge i think its an incompetant cervix, if i have back ache i think its placental abruption and if its cramps i think its pre-term labor ... why am i still feeling like this???

can anyone reassure me please?

maybe tell me pre term labor isnt that common and bleeding at this stage isnt common?

i think its because i had a bleed at almost 15 weeks (was after sex) and brown discharge for a day at 19 weeks, i keep thinkin its going to return xx


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## WannaB

Well you've alreay survived a few nasties by the sounds of it and your baby boy is still holding in tight there so I thing that is very reassuring! It isnt very common to go into pre-term labour at all, the thing about being on forums like this is that its all about pregnant women, seems like every second post you look there is something horrible that is happening, but in reality when you spread it over the enitre population of the world its only a very small percentage of ladies that it happens to, seems just to get amplified by seeing it all in one spot. Its only natural that you are worried, I had two perfectly normal pregnancies and I worried all the way through them too, so after you've had a scare is totally normal to be jumping at every little thing, I know I will be after all the mc's Ive had and then you can come and hold my hand through it all! You are going to worry not matter what, just know thats its alright to do it and perfectly understandable and then get on with focussing on the little wonder you have inside kicking the bejezuz out of you! Once you've made it this far there is only a very, very small chance things can go wrong, just looks big because basically thats all there is to talk about on here! Give your belly a rub for me, and look after yourself hun!:hugs:


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## Drazic<3

You have the greatest reassurance in the world hun, that little bubs kicking inside you. He is doing fine and so are you physically, but this mental side of things is grinding you down. The odds are so hugely on your side to have a healthy screaming baby. :hugs:


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## im_mi

:hugs:

forums like this one, however supportive and amazing, have a habit of making one worry.

Think about it this way - a lot of pregnant women just get pregnant, carry the baby for 9 months and pop it out, they dont really need all that much extra support other than their partners and families. a lot of the women that seek out websites such as this one are women who have trouble either getting or staying pregnant. So the ratio of health pregnancies/unhealthy ones is somewhat skewed, i think.

its totally normal to be worried, honey. I worry all of the time after my losses, even though my symptoms are really reassuring. Dont be afraid to ask for help and support hun, and always call your midwife if you are worried. thats what she is there for x


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## Jellyt

I know what you're going through hun. I was exactly the same at your stage and even though I reached viability, I still am. Every time I wake up in the middle of the night I panic that my waters have gone and I still check for blood every time I go to the toilet. If I don't feel her moving all of the time I panic. I think with us ladies that have suffered losses, we won't relax until we have our babies in our arms. As others have said, the odds are with you this time for your little boy to be completely fine and healthy! I know that knowing that won't completely reassure you but I hope it helps. I know websites like this are great for support but they don't always help because the rare time something goes wrong, you read about it on these websites. It's reassuring to know that there are women in almost every situation here to talk to but I do think at times it makes it seem more common than it actually is if people who've had losses/pre-term labour are in the same place. I can't tell you that your feelings will go away by the stage that i'm at now but I can tell you that although i'm still a wreck with worry, I am beginning to let myself get excited and sometimes that takes over my worries which is nice :). You have lots of support here from all of the pregnancy after loss women and we're all here for you to vent to whenever you need! Also, don't be afraid to pester your midwife if you need reassurance...I do! :hugs:


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## lauralora

:hugs: thankyou girls, it really helps to give me something positive to read and to no you are all here :hugs: xx


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