# I won't be disappointed exactly but...



## flamingpanda

<sorry this is so long but I really need to rant a bit!>

I'll start by saying I really have no rights to complain. So far this has been an absolute breeze. After only 2 months of trying we fell pregnant and this will be our first. We've always planned that we would have three. So I'm by no means complaining here but I feel like this is rattling around in my head and I can't explain it to my partner. Men are strange creatures at the best of times!

I believe our little one is a girl. I always have. I have no real basis for this other than a gut feeling. I had a dream at about 5 weeks pregnant that I was holding a baby all in pink. When I think about our future I see us with girls.

When I talk to my boyfriend he tells me he has no preference. However he did make a comment early on that he'd find it easier with a boy. He also scoffs whenever I suggest that I feel it's a little girl as he says I could have no way of possibly knowing that.

He's the only boy in his family and so carrying on the family name rests with him. For this reason I would have really preferred it if our first had been a boy. Not because I don't want a girl or that I'll be disappointed but I feel by having a boy this time it would take the pressure off future pregnancies.

I think what's bothering me most if I feel despite him insisting otherwise he really does think it's a boy. We almost got into an argument the other night because he was being so irritatingly persistent about it. We were sat having tea and he said this woman that used to be at his work had bumped into him in town. She's on maternity at the moment. She was asking how I was getting on and he told her that I'd been fine, no morning sickness etc. She said "oh it must be a boy, I didn't get any morning sickness with my boy". He told me this and I told him that I know some people say that but I'm never sick - ever. However when I talked to my mum about this she told me she never got morning sickness with any of us, the only difference between myself and the boys is she felt a bit nauseous with me. That pretty much describes how I've been to be fair. However when I said this to him he just wasn't interested and said there was no way I could possibly know. So getting a bit irritated I asked him why he was happy to believe some random woman in town but not trust in symptoms my own mother experienced and my gut feeling. 

There is every chance I'm wrong but I worry that his insistence that I have no idea means more than he's saying to me.

Whilst I think he'll adjust and be fine I'm slowly beginning to dread the idea of the 20 week scan now. There's part of me that just doesn't want to know what it is. I'm also concerned that I can't seem to get my head around it being a girl because of this. I have a long list of boy names I like and I can't find one girl name. It's driving me crazy. I went through an entire baby name book laying in the bath yesterday and not one name sounded right.

I don't know what to do, I can't talk to him about it anymore because if he rolls his eyes one more time I won't be responsible for my actions! :wacko:


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## Guppy051708

:hugs: Sorry hun. Thats never easy when your partner doesn't understand. :nope:
How many weeks pregnant are you? (hate that siggys can't show up in this section!)

It sounds like there is a lot of pressure. But you can't deny your feelings. :nope:
Dont feel bad about this. 

And that lady your hubby was talking to, i dont agree with her about MS! I think its more dependent on the mom and that particular baby, not whether baby is a boy or a girl. I have two boys. I had no MS with DS1. And i had LOADS of MS with DS2 and it lasted the entire pregnancy. So, like you, i take stuff like that with a grain of salt. 

I understand you are not asking this, but i just wanted to share with you what i would do in such a situation. I think surprises are great, so if you want to do that then that would be fabulaous! but it also sounds like you both are more tripped up over something that is currently unanswered, but can be answered soon. Maybe more enjoyment would come from the pregnancy if you knew? But thats certainly not for me to judge. I think you know him and yourself then best and only you can decide. I do hope that you two find some common ground though. Its def. not easy :hugs:


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