# Is 25 too young for 3 kids?



## lulasmummy

Just wondering how people feel about this? I'm 25 this year, I have 2 girls (6 and 19 months). Been with my OH since I was 15 and had Tallulah at 17 (really young I know). We both work, and manage to alternate shifts so kids are always with one if us and not stuck in childcare all the time. Anyway recently I've had sort of a preg scare and still could be although its swaying more towards a no. This however has made me think about a baby, I'm considering it, but also doubting how it would look, me With 3 children? It just seems a lot. My best friend has always judged me a lot, when I was preg with my youngest she didn't speak to me most of my pregnancy told me I'm wasting my life, I'm boring etc. now I've never been the clubbing type, go out like that probably every couple of months and to be honest after working all week prefer to stay in with my babies ( I'd look forward to this soooo much more) whereas she's the going out every weekend without fail type. She has a son too. So I know how certain people in my life would react. I'm not going to try yet, I just wonder what people think ? Opinions appreciated :winkwink:


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## loeylo

I don't think it is something which anyone else can answer for you. I personally wouldn't like to have three kids by 25, but then again my goal has always been to get my degree and then have a family, so I have never really thought about it. 
I am 24 in a few months and like you I do not really do the clubbing scene. I guess if your eldest is 6 you have had a lot more time to adjust to parenthood than I will have by the time I am 25! So really, I guess it depends if you think you could manage the extra workload/financial strain of another baby. I know a few people who are around about that age and manage their three kids very well (and with you both working you are probably in a better financial position as a few of them stay at home)


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## Bubbles3806

I'm 25 and I can hardly imagine me at this age with one kid let alone three :). But I don't think it's unreasonable. My OH and I partied a lot a few years ago and actually decided we wanted to get whatever we wanted to do or try (the kinds of things you can't do once you really settle down) out of our system. We did, and now we don't really party at all. Our big crazy nights consist of making a fire and having some drinks at home. Most 25yo people I know are that way. You already know the ins and outs of being a mom, so it's not like we are talking about having #1 and not being sure if you're ready to give up a current lifestyle. You'd just be doing what you're doing and adding a new family member to enjoy it with :). I'd say tell your friend to stop being so judgey and do what makes you and your family happy whenever you think you are ready. One day your family will be really all you have and it won't matter what anyone else thought about it. GL to you in whatever you decide!


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## LovemyBubx

I understand completely, 

I had DD when i was 19, family were not happy at first but now they love her to bits & support us & are happy with all the decisions we have made since. 

We are planning to TTC in sept. We are not sure how they will react, but its our lives, our decision & we will be caring for both children with no financial help from anyone, so i don't think they could really say we shouldn't. 

If everything goes to plan i will be 23 when next LO is born & quite possibly 25 when the one after is born. 

I feel the same way about clubbing, i dont have friends with a child so my time is spent with my DD, OH & my family.. & i love it! 

I want my children to have a smallish age gap & i want to be finished having babies by the time im 30. 

i think you should do what makes you & your family happy, if you are ready & can cope with 3 at 25 then why not go for it :flower:


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## x Zaly x

Its your life, only you can decide what is best for you. I had my daughter when i was 18. Im now 21 and really wanting numer two. I think if your prepared for the extra work and your ready for it then go for it. It doesnt matter what any body else thinks xx


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## oceania

Like others have said it's your life and there will always be someone who thinks what you're doing is not right. Personally I think it's very courageous to have many LO's at that age and it's something I don't think I would have coped with. I am 24 and even though I'm not a partygoer or drinker I have really enjoyed studying and extensive me-time + lots of travelling in the past few years and just spending my money on me...:flower:


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## BrandiCanucks

First of all, if your best friend is THAT critical of you and didn't speak with you through your pregnancy, why is she still your friend?

I'm 26, and had 3 kids by the time I was 24. I had my first at 21, second at 22, and third at 25. My oldest two are 20 months apart, and my middle and youngest are 29 months apart. It has its challenges, especially with my oldest daughter being special needs, but I LOVE it and wouldn't trade it in for the world. I am not a clubber either, and prefer to stay home and relax on the couch with a book, or to spend tons of time with my kids. I don't make many friends because everyone my age ARE clubbers, but it's just who I am, and if you're happy and comfortable with who you are, then don't let anyone bring you down. If you want three, go for it!


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## lulasmummy

It's comforting to know I'm not the only one! I think people who have no kids will think 3 is a lot, whereas once you have 1 you feel like adding to them and its not a massive deal if that makes sense? We provide for our babes, they get the best of everything including attention. Like I said I'm not ttc just curious but thanks girls xx


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## Pearls18

You sound pretty on the ball to me, I think it's when people are on their 3rd with 3 different fathers by a really young age where it starts to look irresponsible although I guess it's not for us to judge really. But if you're financially independent and have a strong relationship I don't see why age has to matter, at the end of the day you have started having your children, you&#8217;re not going to have much more independence as a mother of 2 than 3, so while you&#8217;ve started having children you may aswell have your family now? But I would just like to add there&#8217;s nothing wrong with children being in childcare full time, if both parents want/need to work then that is what has to happen sometimes and being 25 or 35 makes it no more or less irresponsible it&#8217;s just one of those things if you don&#8217;t have family around, DS being in childcare is nothing to do with my age, I&#8217;m proud to be earning enough to be able to send him lol. But don&#8217;t panic about your age, tbh if your &#8216;best&#8217; friend judges you that much she&#8217;s not a friend worth having :flower:


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## greats

You do whatever you think is right! A friend of mine is 23 & pregnant with her 4th!


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## sophxx

Personally I think it is. But what dies what I think matter ud never tell you that it anyone else unless they asked.If you want to your nit living of benefits and can afford to pay for the children and look after them then it's up to you.


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## YoungMummy08

i dont think it is, i have a friend whos 26 with 26 im 23 with 2 and ttcing my 3rd. at the end of the day no one can make that choice for you x


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## lucy_smith

i think that if you feel ready go for it !
my mum was married to my dad had me (eldest at 20 and had 3 by 23 and 5 by the time she was 26.)yeh she popped them out quite fast lol they did the exact same thing and sorted childcare out between then and had a roof over there heads and payed there own way so i dont think there is a problem with it :) 
I dont think it is anything to do with age it is to do with maturity !


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## Gemx4

I fell pregnant with my first at 19 by 25 I was pregnant with my fourth!! He will be one in March and I am now 27 and really want baby number 5! It's your choice how many you have and only you can make that decision. I am exactly the same as you I have no time time for clubs, pubs, alcohol etc etc. I'd rather stay home with my babies and sleep!!


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## bassdesire

Loads of people have three before 30 totally fine.


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## elitemind01

All you have to do is to enjoy your family life. Cherish your kids and don't let other people's opinion dictate how you will live your life. :)


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## wishuwerehere

I hope to have 3 by the time i'm 25 or 26...i had my first at 19 and i don't want to have my last 10 years or more later...i think it's fine! As long as you can support them and are in a stable relationship what does it mater :flower:


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## MrsT&Ben

Only you can decide, there is no way I could of coped with 3 children at the age of 25. I'm 29 and struggle with 1! He he.
But you adjust to life as you need to. Only you can make the decision and it isnt anyone elses place to judge.


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## Cajadaem

My sister is 25 and has 5! I am mid 30's and also have 5, i had the older 2 children when i was 18 and 22, then a 10yr gap until my next 3, which are very close, all under 3yrs, and in my opinion, being pregnant, having babies, and all that it entails in much easier in your 20's than when you are older! I found my 2 older kids a breeze, both pregnancy, birth and the sleepless nights ect, but the last 3 have been very hard, from the very start, dont get me wrong, totally worth it, but very hard considering how easy it seemed in my younger years. At the end of the day, its your life, it will be your pregnancy, your child, and nothing to do with anyone else really, live your life the way you want, do what makes you happy, genuine and true people will always be there for you, without opinions!


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## FAR

Hi! I know that things are a bit different now, but for me growing up, this was normal. My mum had 3 children at the age of 22, and so it just seems totally fine and normal to me. 

One of my friends is 29 and has 5 kids, and she does look really young so does sometimes get a negative comment from a random person. But anyone who knows her and her family knows what an amazing job she does, and how well cared for those children are, and that is what is important :flower:


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## xarlenex

As a few ladies have already said your 'best friend' really doesnt seem like a friend at all. I'm 23 had my second child 7 months ago and we're currently trying to figure out when it would be best to have our third, which will also be our last. My son was born when I was just 18 and for that reason only do we want to finish our family soon, we dont want huge age gaps. Living your life for you and not for what others may think is the only way to be happy!


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## babe2ooo

I'm 25 and I have a 4yr old and a step son of 11 and were thinking off trying in may. If your happy then who cares what ever people think, if u work and are paying for your kids then go for it. i'm glad I had my little one at 20 I have a good job and take my child to school and pick him up.


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## RaspberryK

Well you're at your peak fertility in your early 20s soooo no, its what nature intended. 
Ttc at 45 for no 3? ... No stick at 2...

X


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## lulasmummy

Thanks to everyone, you have honestly made me feel better, not that I'm going to ttc today lol but I have been a tad broody lately, and as I said before, telling people would be harder than actually having a baby?! Lol. Anyway gonna consider it now, like I said, we both work, and take care of our kids so it's not as though I'm popping them out and not providing etc. thanx all :) xx


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## vikster

I think only you can answer that question Hun. Everyone is different but if you can love them and afford to feed and clothe them then there is no reaon why not to have 3. Just because it may not be right for some does not mean that it would be wrong. I also think your best friend hasn't been good to you if she is quick to judge x


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## Button#

No one has to live your life but you. If you are in a good relationship, financially secure and both you and OH want a third then of course it's fine, that applies to any age.

It would not have been ok for me to have 3 kids at 25 because I wasn't ready for even one then and even now I only want one more but I'm not you.

If you decide to TTC a third then good luck and I hope everything goes smoothly for you.

Oh and find a new friend, you don't need the aggro!


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