# Horrible, Upsetting, IUI Experience, Please Help (long)



## pearinthesnow

Hi Ladies-

My experience yesterday has made me finally stop lurking! I went for my first IUI yesterday and it was a horrible, horrible experience and my clinic just dismissed my concerns. I need to know if I am just being hormonal and irrational or if what happened really is a cause for concern.

Everything went along fine until the Dr. (not my reg RE, but another OB from the practice), had trouble getting the catheter into my cervix. I told her that I have a very tight cervix, and a tilted uterus and that everyone has trouble getting my cervix to cooperate. That being said, she spend a long painful few minutes trying with her original plan and materials to get the catheter in my cervix. After much pain and manipulation, she finally grabbed my cervix with a tenaculum and forced the catheter in. I immediately told her and the nurse that it was very painful and I could not take much more.

Then, here is the bad part...They said they would be back in 10 minutes and I should just relax. With the speculum, catheter, and some other unknown metal thing sticking out of me! I said, "excuse me, are you serious? Because this really hurts and seems irrational." They said yes and promptly left me alone in the room.

The Dr. never came back in and I told the nursing assistant that she sent in to remove the contraption how awful it was, and she said that is just how we do things here! She left me to get dressed, and I pulled out the drawer to look at the instruments. There was bright red blood on all of them. 

I was in too much pain and near tears and so did not insist on talking to the Dr. while I was there. I called back today while I was calmer, and they once again said this was how they do things. 

I should mention that I am a nurse and have never, ever, seen anything like this. I would never do this to a patient either. I think at the very least it is uncomfortable, at worst painful and humiliating. 

I have only heard of IUIs being done, sperm injected, and then the catheter and speculum is immediately removed and the patient is allowed to recline and rest a bit. I understand manipulating a cervix can cause bleeding/spotting.

So am I wrong to be upset? Is this really standard practice? Has anyone else had this happen?

I feel violated. Honestly, that is the only word I can use to describe it. 

I am still spotting and cramping 36 hours later.


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## MissAnnabelle

OMG - that sounds awful! Where is the clinic? I have never done IUI, but I have done IVF and they use most of the same stuff and they don't do it like that. They gave me vallium and I always have to cough to relax my cervix because the catheter never wants to go in. I would tell them - if you ever go back - that they are not to do that - that way to you next time. But, like I said, I have never done IUI, so wouldn't even know if that was standard or not - it just sounds weird to me.


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## pearinthesnow

Thanks, MissAnnaBelle!

I thought it was really weird also! I did call back today and tell them that if I was ever to go back there, that they would have to give me some sort of pain killer and valium and no way would they leave the speculum in.

My RE's assistant said they did not know if that would be possible and they would call me next week!


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## CanadianMaple

OMG, that seems crazy! I'm interested to hear if this is normal, I can't imagine having that happen and then being left alone. I'm so sorry. Their reaction is just wrong. Even if that is their normal, they must be able to do something slightly different or reassure you at the very least.


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## Stardust1

No totally not normal or acceptable certainly not by my experience any way, I luckily have only done iui once and I too have a severely tilted uterus. My Fertilty nurse did struggle a little but once I sat on my fists she was fine, as soon as the sperm was in everything was removed immediately and I was left to rest for 10 mins. I never had any bleeding and only a teeny bit of cramping. I'm really really surprised this is standard practice for a clinic and I'm so sorry you have been treated so poorly :hugs:


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## pearinthesnow

Thank you.

Congrats on your BFP!


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## 2have4kids

Pearinthesnow do you have alternative clinics you can go to? This is bloody horrific! This is NOT normal. I would report it to the overseeing authority (every region has one) and if you can help it, do not go back. Try to help it not happen to someone else. Trust your gut instinct on this one, what they did sounds like the penalty box punishment that we used to use at a previous job of mine while in uni... If the caller is irate or bad in any way we'd put them on hold (for 5-10 min). If they had no good reason to leave you alone like that they shouldn't have. Had you moved you could have injured yourself. Gawd, I get all worked up over abuses like this.


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## pearinthesnow

2have4kids said:


> Pearinthesnow do you have alternative clinics you can go to? This is bloody horrific! This is NOT normal. I would report it to the overseeing authority (every region has one) and if you can help it, do not go back. Try to help it not happen to someone else. Trust your gut instinct on this one, what they did sounds like the penalty box punishment that we used to use at a previous job of mine while in uni... If the caller is irate or bad in any way we'd put them on hold (for 5-10 min). If they had no good reason to leave you alone like that they shouldn't have. Had you moved you could have injured yourself. Gawd, I get all worked up over abuses like this.

There is a clinic an hour away from me...I made an appt for a consultation for next week. I think maybe it's worth the drive.

They did call me back and say I could request to have the speculum removed if this cycle fails, but they would not be looking at changing their protocol. I really don't want this to happen to other people. 

Up until this incident I was totally not a problem patient! Leaving the patient alone with the spec in is apparently their standard practice. 

I actually tried to remove it myself, it hurt so bad! But I couldn't reach the speculum screw to release it and I was afraid to just yank it because the catheter was still in my uterus. I actually ended up having to hold it up with my hand because the weight of the 10" of metal attached to the spec was gawd awful. 

My RE is supposed to be calling me tomorrow to address my concerns. I will let you know how it goes!

Thanks for the support.


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## Taylah

That sounds awful I'm sorry that happened to you, they should be reported to the medical board of wherever you are from to stop that being 'the way they do things'


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## Molly_001

that's so not right! what would be the point of leaving everything in there given the sperm has already left the catheter? There's no way leaving a speculum in is going to help at all!! I would definitely talk to a higher authority about this practice. You poor thing that is a dreadful way to be treated.

I had IUI last month and it was nothing like that, they were very quick and then left me to rest without anything being left in. As I said there would be no point leaving anything there...


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## 2have4kids

Pearinthesnow, the only way to make change is to report them. I hope you have enough assertiveness in you to do the right thing.


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## Mommyagain

As many others have said that is NOT normal. I have a several IUI's and none of my expierences went like that. I would report them. And if I was you I would be looking into getting a new FS because they should treat you with dignity, respect, and care. Not to mention understanding and kindness. I am so sorry that happened to you.


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## Redhead7211

I am so sorry you went through that!! That is absolutely horrific. My IUI experience was much like the other ladies described, except I didn't really rest when I was done. I also agree with the other ladies, you should find a clinic that respects you and treats your (and other patients) humanely!


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## holls147

I've only had one iui and it did not go like yours. Though it was uncomfortable due to they couldn't get the catheter into my cervix, I almost asked if we could take a break lol, but once in she promptly removed it about 10 seconds after she released the sperm. I did have some spotting for a few hours afterwards. I can't imagine sitting there for 10 minutes with that stuff jammed up there! So sorry!
:hugs:


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## GarfieldCat

OMG these people at the clinic are unbelievable, for what reason would they keep the speculum in for 10 mins never heard of this before, I have gone through cyst aspiration, hsg imaging, 1 iui and 1 ivf at different places which all involve insertion of a speculum but they never kept it in when they were done which only took them few minutes and I never bleed not a single drop. you should definitely report them so that they can give a better argument other than they do things this way what an excuse!!!!


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## pearinthesnow

Thank you all for replying. You have made me feel so much better! I am so glad that none of you had the same type of experience.

Being infertile is bad enough. There is no need for extra torture!

I am trying to figure out who I should call to report them. Talking to the Drs at the clinic is getting me nowhere.

The hospital that they are associated with? Board of health? ACOG? Maybe all 3?


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## 2have4kids

What city/country?


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## WANBMUM

You poor thing pearinthesnow. 

I have read that some clinics believe leaving in the speculum is better as sometimes when it is withdrawn, it can also bring out some spermies, so I have heard that some clinics like to leave it in there. 
My clinic takes it straight out. They should have explained to you throughout what and why they were doing it, not leaving you lie there like that. My clinic after IUI, the nurses leave the room for 10/15, but they explained this to me. 
I also bleed quite a bit after IUI, I find the speculum really uncomfortable/sore when it is attached. 
Perhaps you should type a letter/e-mail outlining everything. 
What a terrible experience for you on your first IUI. Despite everything, I hope this one is lucky for you :)


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