# Giving birth after bad tear first time?



## Reno

Anyone had a tear-free second delivery? 

With my first we had a perfect labour and LO was as good as gold throughout, but oh boy, I still get shivers when I remember the pain of tearing!! It was up the way (which im kinda thankful for) so clit/urethra/labia. Two midwives examined the extend of the tear and neither were happy to attempt it, so waited 4 hours for a doc by which point all adrenaline had worn off and i just wanted to sleep but had to start up with the g&a again! It was actually, no joke, worse than labour itself and that was after injections to numb the areas! I needed a catether for 36 hours and cried every time i peed for at least a week! About 9 months on I had finally recovered and was pain free! horray! I have thick scar tissue as a result and i am so nervous about whether that is gonna stretch out for me this time round! As you seen I'm only 4 weeks pregnant and already thinking about it...thats how worried i am! I had a water birth the last time (which turned in to a blood bath cos i hemmorhaged (sp?) and while i loved giving birth in the water, im guessing it was partly why i tore so bad (not being examied properly) so hopefully next time i'll labour out of the water and get an episiotemy if i need one! ahhhhghghghgh! :shrug:


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## PrincessJJ

I was cut with my first but feel exactly the same as you, was more painful than the actual labour! Dreading it happening again... Been doing everything in my power to try and prevent it from happening again this time.

I'm due in 12 days so il keep you updated on wether my efforts and attempts to stop it happening again have worked lol x


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## Carly.C

I'd like to know this too. I had 3rddegree tear with stitching to labia too, the recovery wasnt too bad but I've been told I'll need an episiotomy next time for sure.


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## starlight1

Hi I have a 3rd degree tear a d it healed really fast and well I fell preg again when dd was 6 month and was terrified. I decided to get cut second time as it gives more space and less likely to tear. It's easier to stitch and heals better. I looked in to it alot and spoke to consultants. Xx


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## Reno

starlight1 said:


> Hi I have a 3rd degree tear a d it healed really fast and well I fell preg again when dd was 6 month and was terrified. I decided to get cut second time as it gives more space and less likely to tear. It's easier to stitch and heals better. I looked in to it alot and spoke to consultants. Xx

Thanks starlight! I'm definitely gonna raise my concerns! It's not worth the risk for me to go through that again!


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## Eleanor ace

I had a 3rd/4th degree tear with DS, had 50 odd stitches plus more stitches (not sure how many, I was using my time in theatre for a cheeky nap :haha:) for a couple of 2nd degree labial tears- DS really went to town on his way out :haha:. I was given the option of a c-section but opted to try for another vaginal delivery and it went great! I had a 1st degree tear and a tiny 2nd degree tear but didn't even need stitches. I had a water birth with DD which they recommend for helping scar tissue to stretch. 

What degree tear did you have? If it was bad you'll probably be under consultant care this pregnancy (where I am a previous 3rd degree= high risk) and your consultant will be able to talk you through what they will do to help prevent another bad tear.


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## Carly.C

This information is good to know. I'll be consultant led next time too. It's just more scans to make sure the baby isn't too big (Macie was only 7lb3oz)


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## Warby

I had a fourth degree tear with my second. I was induced with my third (unrelated to tear) and ended up with an episiotomy. I thought episiotomy healing was much faster and easier than tear healing.

I had no tears at all with my fourth. :)


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## AC1987

I had 3rd degree tear.. going backwards if that makes sense :haha: omg that HURT, thankfully I had an epidural for the pushing part so I didn't feel it happen. But recovery was awful I hated how it felt to sit, lay, stand.. etc.
So I really hope I don't tear this time.


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## PrincessJJ

Well I had my 2nd baby with no tears, just a small graze due to her spinning around as her shoulders came out as I had such a quick labour xx


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## ckylesworld

Thanks for the update. It makes me feel better.


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## Misscalais

2nd degree tearing with my 1st, 14 mths later birthed his 9lb baby brother and didn't tear, not even a graze :)


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## liz1985

I had a 3rd degree tear with ds, and tbh it didnt hurt as id had epidural and they sent me home with that many painkillers and antibiotics that it never caused me much bother. It was all internal tearing so not sute if that helped. I had to see a consultant 8 weeks after birth and I read the notes on it and saw the diagrams and it didnt look pretty. This pregnancy im under consultant care and have been offered a c-section at 39 weeks. Im so torn on what to do as theyve compleatly left the decision upto me. Has anyone else been offered a c-section second time around? Ive done a lot of research and actually giving birth in water is one of the biggest ways to prevent tearing, as is not having an epidural and not giving birth lying down.


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## liz1985

PrincessJJ said:


> I was cut with my first but feel exactly the same as you, was more painful than the actual labour! Dreading it happening again... Been doing everything in my power to try and prevent it from happening again this time.
> 
> I'm due in 12 days so il keep you updated on wether my efforts and attempts to stop it happening again have worked lol x

Can I ask what youve been doing to avoid it? Ive been offered a section but really want a natural birth and have been looking into ways to avoid tearing, id be grateful for any tips/advice.


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## SIEGAL

I asked my OB if tearing was as likely since I tore the first time. He said its actually less likely as your already "stretched"


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## cupcakemomma

I'm so encouraged to read the positive stories! My experience was very similar to the OP's, it took so long to recover. I had an epidural, and the pain was so bad when I tore - I cannot imagine how bad it would've been with no meds. Hoping I luck out with an easier delivery this time.


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## daddiesgift

Them cutting you and you tearing is the same thing. Of course if they cut you will have be numb but in the long run its the same thing. I hope this time around is better for you! Try not to worry about it and know its out of your control. If you worry too much youll tense up and be nervous during birth. For me I tore both times. The first time my son came out facing the wrong way (posterior) and he had a large head I didnt tear too bad. It was a natural birth in bed where midwife massaged the whole time but I still needed stitches. With my second I got an epidural and tore worse even though he was facing the right way and a tiny head :haha: I tore towards anus and up through my urethra peeing was awful for a week or two after birth. I had to use a spray bottle to wipe myself off and I would just pee cause I could barely hold it. Its better now, doesnt hurt and I can start and stop my pee again while going when after birth If I started there was no stopping it! 

So thats why I say the its out of your control thing. I had a natural massaged birth and tore bad, I had an epidural where doctor told me how hard to push to keep from tearing, one kid with a big head, one with a little head, one facing right way, one facing wrong and no matter what I tore.


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## Eleanor ace

liz1985 said:


> I had a 3rd degree tear with ds, and tbh it didnt hurt as id had epidural and they sent me home with that many painkillers and antibiotics that it never caused me much bother. It was all internal tearing so not sute if that helped. I had to see a consultant 8 weeks after birth and I read the notes on it and saw the diagrams and it didnt look pretty. This pregnancy im under consultant care and have been offered a c-section at 39 weeks. Im so torn on what to do as theyve compleatly left the decision upto me. Has anyone else been offered a c-section second time around? Ive done a lot of research and actually giving birth in water is one of the biggest ways to prevent tearing, as is not having an epidural and not giving birth lying down.

My consultant offered me a c-section (encouraged it initially) but was OK with my decision to try for a vaginal delivery. I opted for a water birth as he said that it would help to reduce my risk of tearing. I'm sure it did, DD was in the same position as DS and tried to come out with her hand up (which is what resulted in me tearing the 1st time) but I was able to move more easily and get into a good position to move her in the water. Definitely recommend it!


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## Caroline:-)

I had a bad labial/clitoral tear with my first. They wanted to take me to theatre to stitch it, but in the end the dr agreed to do it in delivery. I had a catheter in for maybe a day & half/ 2 days... I also was worried about what would happen with my second bug it was fine! This time, although I did tear in the same direction, it was a much smaller tear and in the end they decided to leave it to heal itself rather than stitch it.


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## Batman909

I tore the first time with a 7 lb baby then nothing the second 9lb10er. I pushed on my back the first time but second time I was on my knees on the floor leaning against the bed much easier. Position definitely helps.


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## PaiytonsMummy

I've had two 3rd degree tears, and my son was more than lb smaller than daughter. Dr said i push the babies head out too fast, not that i could control it. I was also told that's it's very likely I'll tear again, so I'm having a section with this one, in 10 days eek!

My midwife did say she'd never seen a woman with 2 previous 3rd degree tears before, so i guess it's pretty rare. If i was to try a natural birth i would ask to be cut to see if that made a difference. But with all my scar tissue, i doubt it would make a difference.


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## ohbananas

I had a 2nd degree tear with my first she was 6 lbs 14 ounces, no tear with my second and that was with my water breaking 44 hours beforehand, and she was 8 lbs 1 oz. :)

The first one it took me 5 pushes to get her out, the second it literally took 1 push.


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## junebabycomin

I'm so scared of this too...had an episiotomy and a 3rd degree tear after pushing for 4 hours to get LO out. MW called a doc in to help with stitching and it took like an hour (while my poor LO was in the NICU and I had no idea how he was doing). My LO's head never molded and he wasn't in quite the right position, so I'm hoping next time around things will be easier! But I have so much scar tissue that a different doc referred me because she thought I needed to have a surgical repair and suggested a c-section next go round. I will definitely have some labor fears for #2 that I hadn't even considered with #1.


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## mrsmammallama

Yikes! I can relate to your terrible tear. Mine was worse than the labor too! :/ (But your experience sounds worse than mine! eep!) Have you thought about stretching out before giving birth? You can use warm olive oil and actually stretch the area, which might help?!


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