# Still devastated...



## elle1981

Well I've been trying to stay away form b&b etc, to help get my head round things...

yet i still feel so sad and in complete denial that this is a boy.

Everyone is saying its a girl...my friends, family even my midwife. The way I feel and my bump is like when i was carrying my dd's rather than my son. When the midwife listened to the heartbeat...she was like ooooh a galloping horse, i sense pink! 
I have heartburn again which I only ever had with my dd. 

I know the consultant said boy at my scan at 14wks but surely thats pretty early and still tricky to tell. I am finding myself unable to believe its a boy until my 20wk scan and that its confirmed. And I'm so scared that if its still a boy, I'm going to be unable to enjoy my last ever pregnancy. 
I am trying sooooo hard to get enthusiastic about it being a boy, looking at clothes, nursery items etc, yet i just think errrrr blah blah boring!!

I am so scared i'm going to still feel like it when the baby is born as well, as its going to cause trouble bonding or even postnatal depression! 

I have even ordered a tarot reading...to see what they say. 

I have never felt like this before ever....and its horrible, but I just cant help it. 

Elle xx


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## pinkribbon

:hugs: I'm sorry you're still feeling miserable. :( 

I would say at 14 weeks there is more chance of a girl 'turning into' a boy than a boy 'turning into' a girl, but like you say it's early days.

When this baby arrives and you see his face for the first time the rush of love will hopefully outweigh any negative pregnancy feelings.


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## Halle71

I was in the same position as you a few weeks ago and it was confirmed on Monday that I am having a boy..... I do feel disappointed and I still imagine in my head how differently I would feel if she had said 'it's a girl', but I am slowly getting my head round it. 
Unfortunately I found out yesterday that my OH's cousn is expecting twin girls which set me back a bit though.

I know I will still want a girl until he is born but I am desperately hoping that when I see him for the first time I will forget all this.....

FYI - I am about to post pics on my post of a load of cute boys stuff I have bought on ebay to convince myself that a boy can be cute too.....


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## Ecologirl

I'm so sorry you're still feeling like this. I suppose there's a slight chance it could still be a girl, and I'd probably be hoping and still praying for the samemif i was told boy at 14 wks. Just doesn't sound promising that's all. You will still love him. Do you have a name? I've kinda decided on one for my boy, and although DH hates it, I'm not budging. It's really one of the only things helping me to feel some kind of connection to this baby at the moment. That and the kicking which is now in full force. 

Boys things can be really cute too, just wait til you're actually dressing him. So many sales on now ane eBay like Halle said. I know you said you were trying, but maybe just force yourself to buy one thing or a little toy for him. 

Tarots though can be risky. I know because I do them myself. You're better off going there with a clear head and not wishing anything while you're doing it. An open mind is much better. Might help you though as I'm sure you have the love there for this baby, no matter what sex it is. You just need help to see it, so maybe the cards will tell you that.

Stay strong, xo


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## elle1981

Well....the tarot lady was pretty spot on...

she said she sees a boy... had some significant dates for us that match, and told me not to hang around getting to hospital (ds was 45 min labour from start to finish.. and the hospital is 35mins away..luckily I was already there)

And deep down I know shes right. I know your all right and that i am team blue and that it would have to be a miracle to have them tell me its a girl at 20wks. I just need to get there and then once its confirmed i can move on and deal with it properly. I can't help but hope...its in my nature! :dohh:

And I have looked at boys stuff, and i know they can be cute ( I have a very cute little man already) its just i dont want to like it..and I can't muster the energy or enthusiasm to like it! I cant even be bothered to look at prams or anything either..and I'm really cross I feel like this as I should be enjoying every second like I did with all my other pg's!

Elle x


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## Mummy2B21

Hugs x


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## Baby321

I am sorry you are going through this. i am also going through the same . i am having my fourth baby which i was told at 29 weeks is a girl. this will be my fourth girl, desperately wanted it to be a boy this time round. i was advised not to have any more babies last time but I took the risk but it did not pay off. I have never felt this bad. i have bought my little girl alot of very nice things in order to get enthusiastic but I also can't make myself to be enthusiastic. I am stuck in a dilemma, doctors are telling me to get sterilised this time because I am really risking it. I, myself think to not to in case i want to try again but doctors are trying to explain to me if anything happens to me who will look after the kids i have got. So, i really don't know. I just don't know why I have been put in this situation. Just don't know anymore what to do. i am due to have my section in just under six weeks. I might feel better once I meet my baby. Hope it works out for you xxx


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## cosmicgirlxxx

I know how you all feel, I'm currently 29 weeks pregnant with my 5th boy.
I'm not going to ever get over it and I'm already looking at PGD for number 6.
I didn't want 6 kids (I didn't want 5 but there you go).
Completely understand your feelings :hugs: x


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## Baby321

cosmicgirlxxx said:


> I know how you all feel, I'm currently 29 weeks pregnant with my 5th boy.
> I'm not going to ever get over it and I'm already looking at PGD for number 6.
> I didn't want 6 kids (I didn't want 5 but there you go).
> Completely understand your feelings :hugs: x

hiya cosmicgirl, I am thinking of gender selection, just still not sure, keep changing my mind about getting sterilised. next time when I see the consultant i will be asking her how risky it would be for me to have a fifth section,if its ok I am also considering pgd. Cosmic girl, I wouldn't know where I'd start from. Which clinic would you go to? Is it reliable? Please could you advise me. We are in the same boat here. :hugs::hugs:

If you don't mind me asking, which country are you from?


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## cosmicgirlxxx

I'm in the uk, I'm currently looking at clinics in Cyprus. The prices vary a bit but I'm thinking it's going to be around £5k x


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## Baby321

cosmicgirlxxx said:


> I'm in the uk, I'm currently looking at clinics in Cyprus. The prices vary a bit but I'm thinking it's going to be around £5k x

Cosmicgirl, how would you know if they are reliable clinics?


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## cosmicgirlxxx

I'm on a couple of GD forums and have read a lot of reviews from ladies who have used these clinics x


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