# No more babies and no more chances



## george83

I have 3 amazing boys and I know deep down that we done having children but I cant get rid of this utter heartbreak that Ill never have my girl. Everybody I know at the minute seems to be pregnant and Im so sick of seeing elaborate gender reveals to find its yet another girl for yet another person. My fake smile is wearing so thin. How do I move forward from this, I dont think this sadness will ever go


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## Bevziibubble

:hugs::hugs:


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## laura11111

I don't know the answer, but I know how you how you feel. How old is your youngest?


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## george83

He&#8217;s two, I feel like everybody I know is having baby girls at the minute which is why I feel like this. My sister and her husband actually complained at the weekend that they&#8217;ve just found out they are having a girl and they wanted a boy. They went through ivf so I thought they&#8217;d be grateful for anything but listening to them complaining really hurt. 

How old are your lo&#8217;s?


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## LoraLoo

I was never bothered about babys sex but guess I'm 'lucky' that I got a mix...however, I still feel like you. I'm done but I still feel... not quite done, and sad. 
For me I think its because my family will never feel complete because of the children ive lost. Im ok with gender reveals but pregnancy announcements I dont deal with very well! How do you deal with it? No idea! Just wanted you to know that you're not on your own x


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## george83

Thanks ladies love this forum, theres nobody else I could say things too.

I just took a load of baby things to my sister and left behind my bag of blue blankets which she wont need and now its sat in my bedroom taunting me that she gets to have the girl she doesnt even want but I do :cry:


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## LoraLoo

Is baby number 4 a definite no for you?


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## george83

I honestly think so we&#8217;d have to move and I love the location of our house for our boys so I feel like I&#8217;d be making them suffer for selfish reasons and I&#8217;m not sure how I&#8217;d feel if I had a fourth boy, which I know sounds awful. I know this is partly jealousy at the minute so hopefully it will pass again.

Thanks for listening x x


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## laura11111

george83 said:


> Hes two, I feel like everybody I know is having baby girls at the minute which is why I feel like this. My sister and her husband actually complained at the weekend that theyve just found out they are having a girl and they wanted a boy. They went through ivf so I thought theyd be grateful for anything but listening to them complaining really hurt.
> 
> How old are your los?

You know what? I think it's hurts either way. My brother and his wife were hoping for a girl so they are getting what they wanted. That kind of makes me mad. Why does everyone else seem to get what they want? I'd be mad too if they had wanted a boy.

My boys are 3.5, almost 2 and almost 9 months.


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## george83

laura11111 said:


> george83 said:
> 
> 
> Hes two, I feel like everybody I know is having baby girls at the minute which is why I feel like this. My sister and her husband actually complained at the weekend that theyve just found out they are having a girl and they wanted a boy. They went through ivf so I thought theyd be grateful for anything but listening to them complaining really hurt.
> 
> How old are your los?
> 
> You know what? I think it's hurts either way. My brother and his wife were hoping for a girl so they are getting what they wanted. That kind of makes me mad. Why does everyone else seem to get what they want? I'd be mad too if they had wanted a boy.
> 
> My boys are 3.5, almost 2 and almost 9 months.Click to expand...

You have almost the same age gaps as me! I understand that maddening feeling as well - everything about it feels unfair. 

Ive just read that Coleen Rooney has had her 4th boy, Im sure shes over the moon but Im scared that would be me. She has everything money can buy and still doesnt have a baby girl


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## 6lilpigs

Maybe look into swaying if you haven't already, this may help you decide if you are definitely, definitely! done having babies. You may read that you are a complete classic boy making mum and know that there is nothing you can do to change it or you may read that the things the ladies are doing sounds doable and is worth giving one more shot. My youngest is 2, he is freaking adorable!! I bet your little man melts your heart the same as this rascal:) I used the gender dreaming site, we were swaying blue:)


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## george83

6lilpigs said:


> Maybe look into swaying if you haven't already, this may help you decide if you are definitely, definitely! done having babies. You may read that you are a complete classic boy making mum and know that there is nothing you can do to change it or you may read that the things the ladies are doing sounds doable and is worth giving one more shot. My youngest is 2, he is freaking adorable!! I bet your little man melts your heart the same as this rascal:) I used the gender dreaming site, we were swaying blue:)

I thought of swaying before I fell unexpectedly pregnant with ds3 but in fairness almost everything I read I was naturally doing so in theory ds1 and ds2 should have been girls. Maybe I am just a boy making Mum :cry:


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## LoraLoo

Not sure how to word this without it sounding wrong, but if you tried again and got a boy, you might not have got the girl you wanted but you haven't lost anything either, and i always think you might regret not trying again but you'd never regret having another baby even if it was a boy x


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## lau86

.


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## donnarobinson

This is me ! I have 3 boys youngest is 2 and I feel done but a part of me so badly wants to try again I want a girl but Im scared Ill have another boy and although I no I would love them . The fact I dont want any more kids really means I would only be trying to have a girl and Ino it could be another boy. I also see all these people pregnant having girls or even having a boy after so many girls and Im so jealous ! I just turned 30 so I do have time if I want another but Im enjoying life getting easier now and I really dont want to start over but I think Ill always be sad I dont have a baby girl and I feel like deep down I probably will want to have another x


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## george83

I woke up this morning to another &#8216;we&#8217;re pregnant&#8217; announcement for somebody who already has 3 boys. Her scan just looks girlie too. It made me so sad all over again. Then a Mum at school was complaining she has to buy bows for her daughters hair, what a problem to have! :cry:


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## Andypanda6570

george83 said:


> I woke up this morning to another âweâre pregnantâ announcement for somebody who already has 3 boys. Her scan just looks girlie too. It made me so sad all over again. Then a Mum at school was complaining she has to buy bows for her daughters hair, what a problem to have! :cry:

I deal with the same thing everyday and I am done, no more babies for me.it's ok, but I know it hurts so much, I know. I never had a good relationship with my mother and I say to myself I am such a better mother than she ever was and God blessed her with me, why? She basically threw me away and I would have never done that to any of my kids. It isn't fair on us, but I firmly believe there is a reason for everything, even this. I see my niece and I am just in awe of her and I buy her everything, I love her. But I hate my niece's mother, my SIL. She has 3 boys also and she was blessed with this cute creative and such a sweet and mild daughter, who she doesn't deserve :( plus, she named her the same name as the baby I lost, but that is another story and took me years to get trough :( .. My Niece is 5 now and the clothes and the bows but most what really hurts is that bond, I will never have that :cry::cry: and that to me isn't fair. You're aloud to be upset, it will be ok. And you never know, never say never . XOXOXO :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## donnarobinson

george83 said:


> I woke up this morning to another were pregnant announcement for somebody who already has 3 boys. Her scan just looks girlie too. It made me so sad all over again. Then a Mum at school was complaining she has to buy bows for her daughters hair, what a problem to have! :cry:

Hugs ! I no so many people with all boys who then have had a girl and wish it could be me . Ino its terrible and I feel happy for people who get their girl but I also secretly hope they have another boy how bad is that. I would never ever vent and say it out loud but I Seeth with jealously when I hear people having girls . There is a girl Ino has 4 girls and is now having a boy in even jealous of her having the gender she wants. I badly want a girl but I just no I would be the one who didnt get a girl and had another boy and I hate the comments you get when people find out your having yet another boy like they feel sorry for you. I honestly adore my boys and I do think I would be ok having another but I really really want a girl. All I can think of is babies lately I really want to try again but i also dont want to x


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## Gym knickers

Can I come at this from the other side. Ive got three girls and I really do adore them all. But Im sad Ill never have a son!!! Im a teacher and I always love the little rascally boys, always imagined my mummys boy (even though my girls are all for me) and is love to give my husband a son even though he says he doesnt want one. I want another baby even if it was another girl but hubby is done. Our third DD has been really challenging in lots of ways and we are exhausted but Im hoping I can sway him in a few years. Ill always dream of adding a boy to the mix but I cant ever see it happening. Im not sad about it day to day but he will always be at the back of my mind.


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## kat132

oh wow this is exactly why i came on here today to say exactly the same. my 3rd is just 5 months old and i know i am done having babies but i cant get over that i will never have a girl. it breaks my heart everyday:cry:


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## kittylady

I'm due #4 and have 3 girls. I thought I was done and then I got past my dd3 1st birthday and decided I wasn't. My husband doesn't really want anymore but I know he will love me anyway. I haven't told anyone in RL though. I'm enjoying the no drama approach. &#128514;


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## george83

So today I spent the day with my sister constantly talking about her unborn baby girl and then come home to see a Facebook friend is having a girl after 3 boys. I&#8217;m so happy for both of them but it&#8217;s just made me so sad, I don&#8217;t even have the energy to pretend today. What is wrong with me, I&#8217;m such a bitch


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## bdb84

You're not a bitch for feeling sadness at something you feel you will never get to experience.

I do not know your feeling because I have a mix, but I do know I'd feel the same as you do. That's a given. I do not know a single woman with same gendered children who does not ever feel that way. I do believe that there comes a time of acceptance, though. 

Is your husband done having kids? If he's receptive to more, I'd give it a go. I can think of three of my IRL girlfriends who personally finally had the opposite gender on their 4th go. One had all girls and finally a boy and two were vice versa.


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## george83

bdb84 said:


> You're not a bitch for feeling sadness at something you feel you will never get to experience.
> 
> I do not know your feeling because I have a mix, but I do know I'd feel the same as you do. That's a given. I do not know a single woman with same gendered children who does not ever feel that way. I do believe that there comes a time of acceptance, though.
> 
> Is your husband done having kids? If he's receptive to more, I'd give it a go. I can think of three of my IRL girlfriends who personally finally had the opposite gender on their 4th go. One had all girls and finally a boy and two were vice versa.

Thanks, we are totally done having kids. Our marriage is rocky and our children would have to make sacrifices even if we were in a place to have another which isnt fair on them. Thanks for replying though x x


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## donnarobinson

george83 said:


> So today I spent the day with my sister constantly talking about her unborn baby girl and then come home to see a Facebook friend is having a girl after 3 boys. Im so happy for both of them but its just made me so sad, I dont even have the energy to pretend today. What is wrong with me, Im such a bitch

This is me I feel happiness for people who finally get the gender they want but I also Seeth with jealous ..
I just want it to be me that finally gets to say Im having a girl Ino Id have another boy and I would get more unwanted comments .. 
I sat sobbing today reading things on google about moms only having boys . My aunt has 5 boys


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## kittylady

I've now told my husband and mum but I don't want anyone else to know right now. All I will get is 'are you trying for a bit and then if we get another girl it will be 'are you disappointed' &#128549; I will probably stay team green/yellow this time.


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## george83

So my sister sent out her girly baby shower invites and I can&#8217;t even bare the thought of going - I will of course. I have already prepared my &#8216;shut down response&#8217; to anybody who suggests to me that she&#8217;s luckier than me as she has a girl but actually on the day I think I won&#8217;t be able to hide how upset I am.


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## donnarobinson

Oh hun its so hard. My cousin is having another she has 2 boys and she would love a girl and how cruel is it that Im hoping she has a boy! That sounds horrendous but I will cry if she gets a girl . I do want her to get a girl and be happy but I will be so jealous &#128553; 
X


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