# Breaking up while 6 months pregnant.



## gabrielle2289

I am 6 months pregnant and literally just broke up with the father of my child a few days ago, I am extremely hurt and so far it has been so difficult for me, I would just like advice on how everyone else who has gone through something similar has made it through a time like this.


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## dustbunny

It is difficult to begin with but keep in mind the reasons behind your decision and why you feel extremely hurt. I broke up with FOB after a month of being pregnant due to his immaturity, needless to say he hasn't changed and I recently found out he has been lying again and have been a bit hurt by this. There will be time that you will feel down about everything, whether you made the right decision and FOB is bound to be a dick at some point but keep strong!!! 
The ladies on this forum are lovely, majorly inspiring and have helped me so much so do not ever feel that you are alone. Major hugs. :hugs:


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## teal

You'll get through it :hugs: it's hard but it's so worth it xx


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## george83

i don't have any advice i'm afraid i had a complicated relationship with my husband through my pregnancy and he then left me properly 3 weeks ago when our son was 7 months old. it's heartbreaking and to be honest i feel worse today than the day that he left but you'll soon have your gorgeous baby to take care off and yes it's hard but being that preoccupied does help. the ladies on this forum are so supportive not just in this section but everywhere and everybody understands when you need to just vent so make sure you scream and shout and cry at us when you need to. 

i wish there was something i could to make it easier xxxxxxx


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## gabrielle2289

here is the story if anyone cares to elaborate or give any advice on it: 2 months ago I was dealt what felt like one of the most devestating blows of my life. At 4 months pregnant, after trusting and belieiving that my boyfriend and father of my child would be my side and help provide a loving stable home for our son, i found out he cheated on me. He even went as far as to speak to 10 different women on facebook, having explict and completely inappropriate conversations with them. Reading these conversations was devestating. The way he spoke of me, my pregnancy and his feeling towards his son. Telling these girls that he was "somewhat taken" or "taken but not necessarily by choice." And here I am thinking everything is going fine. I mean of course, we had our fights, but what couple doesn't and of course, a lot of thing had changed with me being pregnant and all, the level of intimacy, my hormones but that is basically to be expected. No matter what though, I did the best I could. After finding out about the infidelity I of course confronted him and decided for the sake of our son to give it another chance. But now, currently, after 6 long months without proper support, many backrubless, attentionless nights and on top of that cheating, i made a decision to no longer be with him. I can remember nights, during the early stages of my pregnancy just feeling so alone, even when he was right next to me, seeing as call of duty was more important than me, or chatting inapporpiately with some girl while i was sleeping right next to him. It hurts bad, but i am just ready to be happy for once in this pregnancy and give my son the peaceful life i know he deserves. The breakup went like this: around 9 am, after him reassuring me of course, that i could call him anytime if i needed anything, (keep in mind we currently do not live together) i called him telling him i was extremely sore (i mean you try being a 100lbs girl at 6 months pregnant) the back pain is killer, i asked him to stop by before work, he agreed, saying he would be over after running errands. After 4 hours, I realized something was strange, so i text him to see what was going on, the whole story he told me just seemed so inconsistant and based on him cheating on me and me finding out a month in a half prior i had just had enough. Its hard to be pregnant, dealing with that and have to deal with wondering what your signifcant is up to all the time, its stressful. I just told him i couldnt do it anymore, he quickly responded saying ok, i love you and i always will goodbye, i feel like he just saw it as an "out" a way for him to get out of his responsiblities and not feel guilty, he didnt even fight for his family, i see it as he wants to be free. i haven't heard from him since about 3 days ago now. not even a call to see how his son is doing and i think that is what hurts me the worst...im just trying to take this day by day, i feel like i have been through so much with him, from his brother calling my son a "nigger baby" to broken promises, to heartaches, i didn't want my son to grow up in a broken home but sometimes sadly, its what is best.
Currently however, i just feel so abandoned and it feels disearning. He insisted at the time that i quit my job and quite honestly i was so sick during the first 4 months of my pregnancy that i couldn't do anything at all to begin with, i became completely dependent on him, which is a very uncomfortable place for me to be seeing as i have always taken care of myself. Now i have to just start over by myself and i am scared but i know i can do it.


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## gabrielle2289

you're right, i do keep trying to remind myself of how awful finding out your boyfriend has cheated on you, especially while you are pregnant has made me feel. I haven't been able to really rely on him for anything since i have been pregnant. i know deep down that i will be happier without him, i just think the thing that hurts the most is me excepting how easy this has seemed to be for him. no calls to check on baby, just a clean break and it seems he is perfectly content with that, it just seems so unfair. but i am so glad that you said this is a place i can come to vent and just "scream" because right now being as this situation is 3 days fresh that is all i want to do right now, besides cry.


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## gabrielle2289

i am so sorry you have to go through something similar too, i just feel no one should ever have to go through this, seems so unfair, but i know, just like myself, that you can get through it. right now im so angry too but i hope that it goes away the moment my son comes into my life. i am trying to just remind myself i am a mom now (first time mom) and that my child comes first.


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## gabrielle2289

i've also had some questions about custody. during the whole time i was pregnant i had noticed him always saying things like "even if we break up i want to be a part of my sons life" "even if we don't stay together..." seems like this is what he has wanted all along but anyways if i felt he was a fit father i would have no problem with him having joint custody or something of that nature but there are a lot of factors that worry me about him without me having an influence on the decisions he makes with our son. the thought of leaving him alone with him worries me. he has an extensive criminal record, a suspended license (suspended indefinitely) due to two dui's, he lives with someone who does heavy drugs so of course i do not feel this is a fit environment for my son to be around, if i had it my way i would want sole custody with some sort of visitations....any suggestions on what to do here?


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## george83

gabrielle2289 said:


> i've also had some questions about custody. during the whole time i was pregnant i had noticed him always saying things like "even if we break up i want to be a part of my sons life" "even if we don't stay together..." seems like this is what he has wanted all along but anyways if i felt he was a fit father i would have no problem with him having joint custody or something of that nature but there are a lot of factors that worry me about him without me having an influence on the decisions he makes with our son. the thought of leaving him alone with him worries me. he has an extensive criminal record, a suspended license (suspended indefinitely) due to two dui's, he lives with someone who does heavy drugs so of course i do not feel this is a fit environment for my son to be around, if i had it my way i would want sole custody with some sort of visitations....any suggestions on what to do here?

My husband actually cheated on me while i was pregnant too so i know how you feel, at the time he told me it was just because he'd got himself addicted to drugs and the woman he was seeing was easy access to them and like a fool i was stupid enough to believe him. I'm still so angry about it and i've known for nearly a year i'd like to say it gets easier but i haven't found out how yet. :cry::cry::cry:

I live in the uk so it might be different if you live some where else but i spoke to my health visitor on Friday about his access rights and she said that it has to be set up through solicitors but she assured me that my son wouldn't be able to go to my husband's and his girlfriends new house until it was clear there was no drug use there and that supervisied visits could be set up. She also said if i was ever concerned i could contact social services and they would act straight away. I still can't believe the man i married and actually chose to have a child has put me in this situation :cry::cry::cry:


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## blhanson1

x


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## blhanson1

x


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## Octobermommy2

My twins dad and I split when I was only 10 weeks pg. He decided that we were not too good for eachother because I was having not just one baby but two! He wanted nothing to do with any of the pregnancy. When my mom text him on the day I went into labor he text my mom back telling her he was out partying all night and that he will come once he showers and gets sleep.!!!!!! That proved to me that he was not ready to be a father. I had Brielle at 2:45 pm and Ava at 3:15 pm. My water broke with Brielle at 11:20 AM. He did not show up until 9 AM 2 days later!!!!! Then demanded I changed the girls last name to his because they are his girls not MINE! So if you need anyone to talk to Im here for you. I know crazy Baby Daddy issues LOL


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## louloubelle76

f*cking facebook thats why i split with Isabelle's dad when I was 1st pregnant and again 5/6 months pregnant

I wont lie it is hard and can be lonely at first but once you get used to being a single mum you will be fine, have you got family and friends to support you? I found coming on here very helpful.

Are you in touch with him? x


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## BbabyFix

Gabrielle I just joined and am very heart broken from the same experience . It says this was posted in may and I was just wondering how you and LO are Doing now and a update on your baby dad . Please message me . I need someone strong to talk to and your posts have seemed to already help me.


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## BbabyFix

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## MommaAlexis

Keep a journal of everything he has done or said. Sonetimes I have days where I want to call him, ask him how he could do this to us, retaliate, anything. But I reread my TTC/First tri journal on here, and I remember he is not the man I fell in love with. I see how much he changed through my journal of what happened and I put my phone back down. Not worth it.


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## wcthoma1

I am 6 months pregnant..jus broke up with my man becuz he was acting suspicious, lying, and distancing himself from me..I just assumed he was cheating...and its goin on the third week we haven't been together.. I get lonely at times and even horny..but being with him..makes me even more miserable..so I'm trying...and he was going to all my appointments and doin most of what I asked h.. it just seems weird without my other half..HELP!!!


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## mom2b2

I too am 6 months pregnant and just so happen to be going through a similar situation with my son's father. I know this was posted over 2 years ago, just curious. How did things turn out for you?


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## Lauraxamy

mom2b2 said:


> I too am 6 months pregnant and just so happen to be going through a similar situation with my son's father. I know this was posted over 2 years ago, just curious. How did things turn out for you?

I know I'm not the original person who posted this thread but I wanted to send you :hugs:
I left my FOB when I was 4/5 months pregnant with our second child, after a hard start everything turned out amazing for us in the end, it was the best decision I ever made (they're almost three and four now so it was a while ago). Best of luck :hugs:


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## MommaAlexis

As a previous commenter - my comment was made a week before I gave birth to my daughter. We are happy, very happy. I'm half way done a degree in Criminology with high enough grades for a scholarship to law school. Am in a healthy, happy relationship and FOB is nowhere to be seen!


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## babycrazy1706

Big hugs. :hugs:


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## Belle283

I'm going through a similar situation although my partner and I already have a four year old daughter and I am currently 5 months pregnant with 2nd baby. By the date you posted your little one must be about 3 now? Not sure how to send individual messages to people on here but would love to seek some advice from you and hope you and your lo are doing well!


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## Meezerowner

Belle283 said:


> I'm going through a similar situation although my partner and I already have a four year old daughter and I am currently 5 months pregnant with 2nd baby. By the date you posted your little one must be about 3 now? Not sure how to send individual messages to people on here but would love to seek some advice from you and hope you and your lo are doing well!

Happened to me in 2012. Terrible to break when you are pregnant as that's when you need the most support so :hugs: to you.

It gets easier. :wacko:

I will send you a pm so you can reply that way if you want.
EDIT tried that it must be cos you are a new user that pm isn't activated yet. You might have to post 10 times first or something before you can access messaging? Try asking the forum team for advice.


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## alina_sss

This is funny but I am also 6 months pregnant and broke up with my fiance. A lot of people would blame us (you and I) for breaking up "under the hormone pressure", but my case is pretty bad. 
You should know that you aren't the only one. Being a single mom isn't as difficult as it seems, plus you can get any government help you need. 
There is a saying "God gave you a child-god will give you power for the child"


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## mumtobe12345

Ok ladies i know these posts are from a while ago. im just hoping for some advise. i have just split with my partner 2 weeks ago. i am now just over 6 months pregnant and am hurting so bad. he has already been out dating and doing all the typical man stuff he says he missed out on while with me.
he also has a 2 year old child to his ex wife. and i have seen how he looks after him which i do not approve of. while i was with him, if i wasnt doing everything(feediing, changing his nappy, etc.) he would have his mother doing it for him. I do not want my little unborn girl to go through all that with her so called father. i feel he doesnt truely care about his child, he is just having the time with his son to lessen his child support payments to his ex. As both children, his ex wifes and mine were unplanned. Do i have any right to not let him see my child?


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## Karren

mumtobe12345 said:


> Ok ladies i know these posts are from a while ago. im just hoping for some advise. i have just split with my partner 2 weeks ago. i am now just over 6 months pregnant and am hurting so bad. he has already been out dating and doing all the typical man stuff he says he missed out on while with me.
> he also has a 2 year old child to his ex wife. and i have seen how he looks after him which i do not approve of. while i was with him, if i wasnt doing everything(feediing, changing his nappy, etc.) he would have his mother doing it for him. I do not want my little unborn girl to go through all that with her so called father. i feel he doesnt truely care about his child, he is just having the time with his son to lessen his child support payments to his ex. As both children, his ex wifes and mine were unplanned. Do i have any right to not let him see my child?

Dont put his name on the birth certificate, say you don't know who the dad is.

This will bide you some time for when or if he decides to file a paternity test.


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