# Things you'd wish you'd known BEFORE going to the hospital?



## MonstHer

Ello

This is my first time. 
Please say whatever you want!
What are things you wish you had known before being in the birth process that you know now?
Share please with all the NEWBS like myself. :happydance:
Please only hospital or birth centre experiences only.


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## beanzean

I was at Rochdale Infirmary.

I wish I had known the MWs are NOT gods!! They do not know everything, they cannot feel what you are feeling, They don't know if something feels wrong inside you. You are the one going through it and your body is giving YOU the signals as to what is happening. Don't feel pressurised into doing anything, and if something feels majorly wrong then for gods sake get your birthing partner to barracade them in the room until they investigate and take some action. :flower:


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## 5-a-side

Don't go in too early unless told to. 
Keep an open mind to what might happen.

Make sure your birth partner is clued up on what you want, they will be your advocate and will need to speak up for you. 

If you want to make noise...go for it. 
And no question is a silly question. 
And stitches hurt me more than the birth (personally)

Be prepared for the possibility of not so nice showers/bathroom.


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## MrsPsandQs

I wish I'd have slept with a baby blanket for a while before giving birth so it smelt like me, as the only time my little one would settle when not being held by me was when she was wrapped up in my tshirt..

Oh and take anti bacterial wipes in to make using the public bathrooms mildly sanitary..


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## gezma

5-a-side said:


> Don't go in too early unless told to.
> Keep an open mind to what might happen.
> 
> Make sure your birth partner is clued up on what you want, they will be your advocate and will need to speak up for you.
> 
> If you want to make noise...go for it.
> And no question is a silly question.
> And stitches hurt me more than the birth (personally)
> 
> Be prepared for the possibility of not so nice showers/bathroom.



i'll second the stitches are worse than the birth part! although only had stitches on my first labour though, not second..
i'd say go with what your feeling - your body will tell you - the midwife was telling me to push with my second and i knew i wasn't ready a couple of contractions later my body was telling me to push and that's when i did - 2 pushes and my DS was out.. so listen to your body..


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## Reedy

Have an open mind, you might not be one of the lucky ones where its over in an hour you may still be waititng for your baby to make an appearance 32 hours after your first contraction.

Take a few pairs of pj/night dress & knickers with you because if your waters break then you could be changing quite a few times especially if like above your waiting that bit longer x
Also make sure the diposable pants you buy actually fit, because mine didnt, they were too small so couldnt wear them & ruined a good few pair of my normal pants x


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## 5-a-side

MrsPsandQs said:


> I wish I'd have slept with a baby blanket for a while before giving birth so it smelt like me, as the only time my little one would settle when not being held by me was when she was wrapped up in my tshirt..
> 
> Oh and take anti bacterial wipes in to make using the public bathrooms mildly sanitary..

:thumbup: Both very good suggestions!


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## carly_mummy2b

I had a back to back labour, although at my midwife appt the day before he wasnt back to back, little monkey had changed over night, i had terrible contractions in my back and the only thing that helped me was heat, so i had to sent my DH out to buy a hot water bottle! so have one on standby just in case.
Lipbalm - gas and air dries your lips out badly.
I packed a bag of food for DH as we were at the hospital for a long time and the food at the hospital is very expensive.
I also took my ipod and little travel speakers - listening to my own music really helped

I'll add more when i can think of them x


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## jessica716

I wish i'd eaten and slept after my waters broke when my contractions were like period pains..... 35 hours later i'd only just given birth... I was tired, hungry and didnt get given anything to eat by the bloody hospital until 11 hours later!!

My advice.... PACK SNACKS and sleep as much as you can before labour!!! lol


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## Nyn

With my first I wish I'd known what I was letting myself in for when they said my labor had barely started but if I liked they could help speed things up. This sounded great. But induction isn't great. I wish I had gone home and come back hours later. 

I guess I wish I had done my research and joined somewhere like BnB :) x


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## oox_tasha_xoo

Theres a lot of good suggestions on here :)
I was induced with my son and i wish i known how long induction can take inbetween pessaries etc.. they didnt exactly tell me i had to wait 6 hours inbetween pessaries etc
I wish i had taken my own food in, i was SICK of their stupid sandwiches!
Dont wait for them to ASK you if you want some pain relief, ASK for it yourself, i was waiting for a while thinking theyd ask me soon, it never occured to me to ask for it myself :rofl:
Becareful what you drink in labour, I was sick if i drank anything fizzy, so nice flat drinks like quench was the only things i could keep down i advice bringing your own drinks as their vending machines tend to have very limited options :)
Be prepared that everything may not go as you want or follow your birthplan but whatever happens your going to have your beautiful baby at the end of it all :) :D
i also agree about stitches, VERY painful :( i was so scared to go number 2 as i was so sore down below xxx


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## zoe87

Be prepared...i was ecxpecting labour to be long, and for their to be a build up (symptoms) before labour but no they came on thick and fast for me totally in a 3 hour labour. my advice for anything like this make sure you have everything pack and practise breathing techniques really wish i had


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## Celesse

Gas and Air is like being really really drunk, like the best student night ever where the vodka and red bull is 20p each and its someone elses round! And then the feeling is gone, with no hangover within a few seconds of your last breath of it. 

Epidurals (when they work) are like someone insta-stopping the pain, but its a little odd not being able to feel your legs. 

Not all doctors/midwifes feel the need to tell you thier name before asking to stick thier hand up your foof!


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## Stephannie

My advice is not to be too clued up, I wasn't with my first and had a good labour (8 hrs, gas & air & pethadine) this time round ive watched so many programs and im way too aware of what can go wrong that i worry more about that!


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## x__amour

First and foremost, keep an open mind. You'd be surprised how much your mind will change.

Sleep when you can, try not to snack (I snacked and was very sick in my EMCS) but make sure to stay hydrated. If you feel something's wrong, speak up and stay calm! It'll all be okay in the end! 

:hugs:


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## span

I agree with keeping an open mind. :thumbup:

Also make sure you drink plenty and eat high fibre foods as soon as you've given birth to help things 'move along' afterwards. :blush:


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## mummymunch

make sure you pack your hospital bag BEFORE you go into labour!! i did mine when i went into labour,it ws a mad rush as i didnt have a lot of the things i needed as we were supposed to go shopping that evening! x


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## newmumamy

Take some food with u jst incase as hospital food is awful sometimes and make sure you take something to do as the wait can be very long and boring.
Also i would recommend taking really old pants as it can get very mess  lol
x


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## mummymunch

yes definitely food. i hadn't eaten for the whole of my labour. they forgot to bring me my toast but luckily the OH bought me a packed lunch! and ll i had in the morning was a bread roll!


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## catcatcat

They dont tell u after birth u get biggish clots - i panicked and thought there was another babycoming out. 
They dont tell u that u get after pains so contractions continue for a bit after birth.
They dont tell u that u cant stand up straight or walk proparly after _ ouch.
The whole experience is the best in the world.
When u get home you will feel like youve been gone longer and to another planet not a hospital.
You will also b a different person & in love with your new baby most in the whole world.
X


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## silver_penny

If you are looking to do things natural, you have to go in armed with the phrase "I do not give my consent to..."

Otherwise, you can say "No, don't do that." "I don't need that." or anything else similar and you cannot hold the hospital liable if they do it anyways.


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## Bournefree

Read up on the hospital you are going to. 

If you are in the UK you can check their stats here.
https://www.birthchoiceuk.com/Professionals/Frame.htm
XxX


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## Parkep

All the advise is awesome! Bring the comfyist pants you can find for going home :) no one cares that you are going home in black sweat pants lol (thats what i did) best decision i ever made!


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## Kiddo

I'm going to sound really thick here but I didn't know just how big the placenta was going to be. I thought it would just slip out after LO without me even really knowing and didn't realise I would have to actually deliver it.

Don't be too precious about your birth plan. You don't know how you're body is going to cope with labour or what might happen along the way. You may be certain you want an epidural but then realise you're fine without, or vice versa.

Take light jammies/nighties with you. Labour and maternity wards are really hot so you don't want anything cosy.


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## Sproutlet

I didn't realise that I would only be allowed water during labour, I went armed with high energy drinks and high energy snacks and couldn't have any of them incase they needed to do a c section.

Also be aware that just because you are told one thing on labour ward the midwives may think different on the post natal ward. When I had my dd I was advised by 3 midwives on the labour ward that I could go home within 6 hours (as per my request on my birth plan) as everything was fine with both me and the baby but once on the post natal ward the midwives wouldn't believe I had been told this and wouldn't let me go home.


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## kanga

That it's possible your placenta won't detatch from your uterus wall, even with multiple doses of the injection. If this happens, you have a spinal in theatre and someone pulls the placenta out with their hand!


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## mummymunch

kanga said:


> That it's possible your placenta won't detatch from your uterus wall, even with multiple doses of the injection. If this happens, you have a spinal in theatre and someone pulls the placenta out with their hand!

Considering birth is supposed to be beautiful- this makes me shudder! 

Also if your midwife gives the placenta a little tug via the cord to try and move it along, you will feel as though your insides are being jiggled!

And dont be scared if your shower room looks like a murder scene after you have used it!


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## aliss

That pain relief "risks" don't always happen to someone else. Try it naturally first.


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## Eternal

gezma said:


> 5-a-side said:
> 
> 
> Don't go in too early unless told to.
> Keep an open mind to what might happen.
> 
> Make sure your birth partner is clued up on what you want, they will be your advocate and will need to speak up for you.
> 
> If you want to make noise...go for it.
> And no question is a silly question.
> And stitches hurt me more than the birth (personally)
> 
> Be prepared for the possibility of not so nice showers/bathroom.
> 
> 
> 
> i'll second the stitches are worse than the birth part! although only had stitches on my first labour though, not second..
> i'd say go with what your feeling - your body will tell you - the midwife was telling me to push with my second and i knew i wasn't ready a couple of contractions later my body was telling me to push and that's when i did - 2 pushes and my DS was out.. so listen to your body..Click to expand...

i agree stitches were the worse bit of the whole thing and the main worry i have this time


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## Rhio92

When you realise you're in early labour, drop what you're doing and SLEEEEEP as much as possible. You'll need it :thumbup:

Hospital showers are gross. End of.

When you first stand up after giving birth, don't be shocked my looooads of blood suddenly gushing out. Think texas chainsaw massacre x 10. I panicked but the MW laughed.

Gas and air + birth pool = dry mouth. Take water/drinks.

Get a birth partner to take pics. Of everyting. You may regret it if you don't. You can always delete some later.

Good luck :hugs:


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## Nikki_d72

kanga said:


> That it's possible your placenta won't detatch from your uterus wall, even with multiple doses of the injection. If this happens, you have a spinal in theatre and someone pulls the placenta out with their hand!

The injection actually increases the risk of retained placenta, try to birth it naturally unless they are worried about severe blood loss. Also if you make them wait till the cord stops pulsing before they cut it, it will mean the placenta is easier to pass, as it won't be blown up like a baloon with all that blood! It also means the baby gets all the oxygenated and iron-rich blood it needs, up to half of it's total blood volume!:thumbup:


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## Bournefree

Sproutlet said:


> I didn't realise that I would only be allowed water during labour, I went armed with high energy drinks and high energy snacks and couldn't have any of them incase they needed to do a c section.
> 
> Also be aware that just because you are told one thing on labour ward the midwives may think different on the post natal ward. When I had my dd I was advised by 3 midwives on the labour ward that I could go home within 6 hours (as per my request on my birth plan) as everything was fine with both me and the baby but once on the post natal ward the midwives wouldn't believe I had been told this and wouldn't let me go home.

Don't be told what you can and can't do - 
withholding fluids and food in labour has been shown to be determental to maternal and fetal health, even when weighted against the very rare instances of aspirating your own vomit under a general for a c-section.. this is in NICE guidelines.

And if you want to go home, you can at any point! 

There is no let or allowed in childbirth or post birth. Your consent has to be obtained. You are free, and you can eat, sleep, move freely, leave and decline anything you like. Put the empowerment with you and not your health providers.
Xx


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## HopeBabySoon

This is great! Thanks for all the tips!


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## Tegans Mama

I wish I knew..

- that a synto drip makes contractions HURT, when before they were just building and fading pressure.
- that the "intervention spiral" myth is actually completely true - as soon as that canular was in my hand, I was already on the c-section train.
- that I have my own voice and I could have refused the drip, refused the epidural, refused anything I damn well wanted 
- MW's are sometimes ignorant fools
- Birth doesn't have to be traumatic, regardless of what everyone tells you


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## cookielucylou

I also agree that stitches and afterwards was more painful than the birth, make sure you get a good supply of pain relief in. 
I was starving after lo was born and was only given toast as he was born in the evening. 
My biggest tip is don't wait until your waters break until you leave your house. I was waiting and was told on the phone to wait even though my contractions were only minutes apart and lo was born half hour after arriving at the hospital.


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## cookielucylou

I also think the contractions hurt more than the actual birth, but that is also possibly due to the fact I was panicking as I thought they were early contractions and were painful when in actual fact I hadn't really felt my early contractions and these were actually proper full on contractions.


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## modo

aliss said:


> That pain relief "risks" don't always happen to someone else. Try it naturally first.

WSS.

Also what Tegans Mama said.


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## zebbed89

As the other girls said stitches really do hurt and I had an epidural!

Be prepared for a finger up the bottom if you have had stitches, its just to make sure they haven't gone through.

If you have an epidural and have a catheter once it is removed I had 6 hours to do 2 decent sized wees, I had stitches and when I went to wee I couldn't I was so scared I eventually got a trickle out and my god it stung because I hadn't weed enough I had to have catheter back in for 24 hours. I would ask for some painkillers before you go for the first couple of times.

When you get round to the postnatal ward be prepared for a lot of conflicting advice from the different midwives about feeding. Make sure if you want to stop breastfeeding for what ever reason its fine my baby was always hungry after nursing that I got that upset and the midwives were awful to me when I was there. I was in 9 days so had a lot of this and I had so many tears because of it! 

This baby was my first I had no idea how to change a nappy if you are scared or worried ask for help!


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## MommyVonVon

The thing I wish somebody would have warned me was the after-effects of getting and epidural. Its now been 3 weeks since having my baby and my back is killing me! Also how sometimes the nurses arent as patient with you as you would like...


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## lucyl107

zebbed89 said:


> Be prepared for a finger up the bottom if you have had stitches, its just to make sure they haven't gone through.

This has just totally freaked me out lol. Thanks for sharing as I would never have been prepared for this!


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## zebbed89

Its not as bad as it sounds as u have pretty much had everything else by this time and you have your baby so you don't actually care!


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## garnetlady

I was induced after a haemorrage and sometimes the drip makes you contract waay too fast, they just have to find the right level for you.

Consider all pain relief options. I said I wouldn't have diamorphine, but ended up with 2 doses and tried to get my husband to text everyone to tell them how much I loved it and that it was the best thing ever!

You really don't have any dignity in labour and tbh you really don't care, I didn't believe this when I was told but honestly it's not an issue.

My second degree tear didn't hurt nand I was terrified of it beforehand, I barely felt the stitches either really. You can use gas and air whilst you having them too. I actually slept through most of my stitching!

It's okay to say no to things, I told them when I was induced that under no circumstances was I having an assisted birth or episiotomy and when they tried to get me to have forceps and episiotomy as my baby was a bit stuck despite this, I refused and told them that if/when she got distressed then they could section me. They got the sister to try and persuade me but I held firm and after an hour and a half she arrived, with her hand up at her face which explained it.

I had a haemorrage after birth and they put a catheter in, when it was taken out 36 hours later my pelvic floor was awful, but don't panic it's just temporary!

Ooh and drink loads if you have stitches, dilutes your urine so it's less likely to sting and when you pee, tilt yourself forward, less likely to hit the sore bits that way!


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## Rees

Take a tour of any of the places you may end up giving birth, I'd planned a homebirth and didn't expect to get sent to hospital and to this day I still have no idea what's there! (I will be going on a tour this time, which will be strange after already giving birth there :lol:) This way you can ask silly questions about what they have there, visiting policy etc.. (which again I still don't know!)

Do keep an open mind, things may change, however if you strongly believe in something then don't be afraid to speak up or get someone to speak on your behalf. Ask, the nurses don't mind if you ask - how the hell do I change his/her nappy or check if he/she's pooed :lol: and at least you're not fumbling by yourself trying to figure it out!

If you want to leave and everything's fine then discharge yourself, this time I'm leaving from L&D unless there is a problem.

Pack several changes of clothes in case you need to stay in, have LOADS of maternity pads, the after bleeding is horrendous, 20x worse than a normal heavy period.

Don't take a nice outfit for yourself to leave the hospital, think comfy when you pack for yourself.

Take snacks/sandwiches/drinks and anything else you think you'll need (imagine it's a long train journey and there's no buffet car :lol: )

It's your baby, it's your birth, not there's, so try and keep that in mind (if you're not off your face on gas and air :lol:)


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## kittycat18

This is an absolutely fabulous thread as I am due in two days. I have my hospital bag packed, my birth plan made, my partner briefed and I have already had a tour of my hospitals maternity and labour wards. I am going in with an open mind and am worried about some of my Hospitals policies. I am going to have to be extremely firm with the midwives :D


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## madge

Take lots of cartons of juice (ones with the straw), I was so dehyrated afterwards, and on the post natal ward cups of tea kept going cold as i was too busy with my LO!!!

Keep an open mind and be prepared for everything to change. You may not want an instrumental delivery but some times it really is needed. My LO's heart rate dropped and stayed down as she was just about to crown, so it would have taken too long to get to theatre for a csection. Forceps quite simply saved her life. The cord tightened around her neck as I pushed.

Don't be afraid to tell people (family mostly) to back off and leave you alone!!!! This time round I won't be having anyone apart from my OH at the hospital, they can all wait until we are home. Unless we are there days obv!!

Enjoy those first few days/hours, they are so precious xxx


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## feisty_filly

If there is something on your birth plan you realty want go for it, but also be prepaired for the plan to go out the window as no one knows how there going to cope with labour! 
Trust me, you might be shy ect now but when it comes to yours and babys health you realty won't care who sees / touches your lady bits!
Labour and nursery wards are Hot! Don't worry about cosy clothes for you. 
Take a book as although I had a tv in my room, there's not much on at 3 am LOL.


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## feisty_filly

Also if you have an eppi make sure your legs are working properly before you get up, mine felt fine, I had all feeling back and could move them so thaught they would be fine, truest to get up and my legs just crumbled!


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## Celesse

You may moo like a cow. Or make other strange noises.


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## lauren28

I echo the finger up the bum after stitches - that was a bit of a surprise!
I found the stiches completely painless.
If you get put on a drip to speed things up, be prepared for a whole different level of contractions than before.
i had gas and air for birth, and afterwards i threw up all over my husband and the floor - just avoided the baby! 
I was dreading the whole - people seeing my bits part, but didn't care when it happened. i even didn't care that I weed all over the midwife's arm when pushing her out.


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## NeyNey

I wish I'd taken more maternity pads into the labour ward for the birth. - They forget to mention just HOW much fluid you'll be leaking, my waters were broken by the Dr and I didn't have any contractions for quite a few hours - but omg did I leak!! The hospital supplied these pads but they were really quite useless. I only took one with me as I assumed I'd be needing them back in the maternity ward AFTER bub was born - but oh no...lol I was changing them every 30 mins. So that's one big thing I'll be changing next time around.


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## MrsPsandQs

Celesse said:


> You may moo like a cow. Or make other strange noises.

:haha: rofl so true!


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## chuck

I wish Id known that the hospital I ended up in was shocking...I would have demanded to be taken to the other hospital in area.

It pays to do some research on the hospital and the OB's that work there.

I suffered PPD and PTSD symptoms after what they put me through there, so I refused to go there 2nd time around if I had to, I planned a HB far better needed to transfer and a different hospital made all the difference.


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## Delamere19

I wish I'd have known that I would be left alone on the night I was in early labour after my induction. It was quite horrible being left in a little room when you are in pain and discomfort and terrified!!!

It might sound nieve (sp?) but I thought he would be allowed to stay with me.


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## zebbed89

Delamere I found this to although I got lucky and went round to labour ward quite quickly. I also hated that once baby was born and I was taken to the ward oh was only allowed during visiting and I was in for 9 days and oh really struggled to bond with my little girl!


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## chuck

Oh and don't assume things will happen that you know should happen.

I went to theatre for an EMCS without my hubby, I assumed that someone would be kind enough to talk to me they were'nt, I assumed they would tell me he was being deleivered and show him to me, they didn't, I assumed we would be allowed more than half an hour in recovery together before hubby was kicked out as it wsant visiting hours...dang right we got half an hour together.

Sometimes you have to be forceful, make sure the person with you knows what you want and sticks up for you as you may not be in the right framw of mind to do it yourself.

Whether that be allowing students in the room ,asking for a drink, declining useless interventions or having someone with you...stick up for yourself.

You are allowed to say no to anything, ask questions - why do you want to do this/that to me/my baby.

Dont just accept that 'this is what happens/the way things are'


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## Bocket

My advice is to listen to what midwives say- mine was very supportive & was able to give me some really good tips on positions to help with labour, baby was back to back when I went in at 2/3cms but was actually born the right way up- they told me it was me being active & in good positions that helped.

Tell them how you feel so they can help- keep talking to the midwife, she's not the enemy but can't help if you don't keep her in the loop.

Be prepared for things not to go to plan, for me breastfeeding didn't come as easily as I'd been led to believe- ask for help if you need it, the midwives on my ward were very happy to help

ENJOY it! Yes it reeeeally hurts but remember- it's a few hours out of a lifetime & it comes with the best prize- stay positive! 

Prepare to have to wait for lots of checks to be done before being discharged- the wards are often busy & it does take time for the doctor to do the rounds, so when they said I could have a 6 hr discharge, it soon became 10 hours- just enjoy the cuddle time!


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## charleybootS

Remember to pack Straws, the positions you end up in whilst in labour sometimes do not help when you want a drink :haha:

Labour wards and delivery suites are hot, I packed an extra pack of baby wipes just so OH could wipe my forehead/face with them during labour and it was heaven.

Be prepared to hear other people screaming and shouting, do not worry! Some people are more vocal than others during labour :thumbup:

Feeling a bit lost and unsure after the baby's been born (if you have to stay in)and everyone's gone home is completely normal, you'll be fine and if you're concerned, ask your MW's :hugs:


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## chuck

Oh and nick as many inco pads as you can...they're super handy.

Spend some time each day PP with no knickers and no pad just sitting on an inco pad and let the air get to your bits, and when you get out of the bath sit on one and errr 'drip dry' rather than using a towel it can be a bit ouchy. 

The fresh air helps you to heal.


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## sossypops

Take snacks for yourself and also something a bit more substantial for your birth partner. And also pack something like cereal bars in the bag you will have with you when you are back on the ward. I was starving at 3 in the morning after I had my LO and was glad of them!

Ask for pain relief if you want it. Also make sure the midwives respect your decision if you choose not to have pain relief or a certain type. 

Gas and air can make you feel high and very distant to what is happening. I found it helpful to have my DH sitting beside me repeating what people were saying to me. His was the only voice I could concentrate on. 

After the birth you will pass clots and blood. I was quite scared as my womb would contract and it felt like a load of blood would come out. This is totally normal but it can shock you!

Bring lots of changes of clothes for baby as they poop so bad to start with! And it's explosive!

Only bring knickers you are ok with throwing away after, they will get wrecked and you need alot. 

And most importantly try and go with the flow and not to have a fixed idea of how you want the birth to go, as it will very rarely go according to plan!


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## sossypops

Oh and if you have to be induced be prepared that the synto drip will mostly likely kick you into mega contractions. Much much more painful!


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## xoxsarahxox

charleybootS said:


> Remember to pack Straws, the positions you end up in whilst in labour sometimes do not help when you want a drink :haha:
> 
> Labour wards and delivery suites are hot, I packed an extra pack of baby wipes just so OH could wipe my forehead/face with them during labour and it was heaven.
> 
> Be prepared to hear other people screaming and shouting, do not worry! Some people are more vocal than others during labour :thumbup:
> 
> Feeling a bit lost and unsure after the baby's been born (if you have to stay in)and everyone's gone home is completely normal, you'll be fine and if you're concerned, ask your MW's :hugs:

I was just going t say straws ! They were a god send lol x


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## emzky90

Take your own pillow incase you have to stay in, I couldn't get comfy on the bed at night time because of this- they're like disposable pillows lol and the cases always slip off. I only had g&a and 2nd deg tear and didn't feel the injection to numb or the stitches =] Take some cereal bars or somethin for breakfast as their breakfasts aren't great but their dinners are =] My MW was great always asking if i needed anymore pain releif etc. Go in with an open mind and don't worry about anything- just go with your body and concentrate x


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## lynnikins

yeah defo take breakfast options, i had my hubby bring me crossaints, plenty of snacks i was always hungry between meals and in the night and the tiny biscut packs they have on the tea trolley are a waste of packaging lol


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## shelleney

This is the best thread ever :) Thanks ladies


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## LaraJJ

This is really helpful - thanks :)


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## MumtoJ

The best advice I was given for after the birth was to take my fav shower gel / shampoo etc to help feel more "human" afterwards.

Keep an open mind, listen to your body as every labour is different so the MW doesn't know your labour, she / he knows how labour generally progresses.

Keep asking what the options are.

And yep stitches are worse than the birth.


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## Lauraxamy

People have probably already mentioned stuff I will as there's great advice in here but I'll go ahead anyway lol..
Straws like someone else said, I didn't take any and my OH was spilling it all over me trying to get me to sip it :haha:
Lip balm or vaseline or something, my lips actually bled from being so dry off the gas and air.
If your hospital allows it take your own pillow the hospital ones are stupidly uncomfy (well mine were lol)
The best part after birth for me was having a lovely shower and freshening up, I took a bag full of little travel sized toiletries and had a field day in the shower making myself feel ALOT better!
Don't forget chargers if you want to take your phone to update people etc! I bought a cheap spare one off ebay to put in my bag so I wouldn't forget it..
Oh and a purse of change for TV and stuff if your hospitals have them ones where you put money in to get so many hours..
Pack snacks, I was flipping starving the next morning and didn't fancy much of their stuff and hadn't eaten the tea the night before and luckily my Mum had packed snacks and left them with me lol 

If I think of anymore I'll add later :thumbup:


----------



## aj11

if they dont offer, ask for the stool softener the first day. getting that first bm out of the way removed alot of stress for me!!


----------



## tina_h75

I wish I knew just how trimmed you needed to be for a c-section. I had to have an emergency section and wasn't quite as neat as they require you to be. Someone coming at you with a razor for a quick tidy up whilst having contractions is not something I would want to go through again !


----------



## tina_h75

also, afterpains hurt like hell so be prepared for toe curling for the first couple of days of breastfeeding.


----------



## chuck

tina_h75 said:


> also, afterpains hurt like hell so be prepared for toe curling for the first couple of days of breastfeeding.

Not always, I BF to start with and didnt get terrible after pains thankfully.


----------



## tina_h75

chuck said:


> tina_h75 said:
> 
> 
> also, afterpains hurt like hell so be prepared for toe curling for the first couple of days of breastfeeding.
> 
> Not always, I BF to start with and didnt get terrible after pains thankfully.Click to expand...

you were lucky then, with the first they were painful, breastfeeding my 2nd they were agonising and with my third I think I would have preferred contractions again.


----------



## Silverwing

This thread is awesome. I now have plenty of tips for when things finally get moving!


----------



## zuggypops

hi my name is zoe and im 39 weeks and 3 days and i want to get things started 

any ideas people xx


----------



## tina_h75

zuggypops said:


> hi my name is zoe and im 39 weeks and 3 days and i want to get things started
> 
> any ideas people xx

not really, babies will come when they are ready. Make the most of the last few days while you can. Have some relaxing evenings with you OH, go out for dinner, get your hair done and sleep! good luck. x


----------



## madcatwoman

i wish id known induction would give me no build up in pain, i also wish id been informed id be kept in hospital for 3 days for having GBS! Even although i was given the anti b's


----------



## sweetcheeks78

I wish I had kept moving around. My labour had a textbook progression till I got to hospital and they made me lie on a bed hooked up to monitors as three had been meconium in my waters. As soon as I was made to lie down, everything slowed and it just went downhill from there, ending in a very traumatic forceps delivery (and a huge tear) as a last option before C-section. I firmly believe if I had been able to move around freely I would have managed just fine.


----------



## jools85

Labour can be a very slooow process, rest as much as you can at the start!
Going to the toilet for a one or two is not as bad as you think, I was in tears at the thought but it was really fine, just take your time (or a book haha)


----------



## Julie_B1

what a fabulous thread. I am 28 weeks pregnant and am a complete nightmare for needing to be organised. I think I have written down a very long list from all the great advice. Thanks everyone.

Here's the summary for anyone reading this for the first time:

Ipod (plus charger), nighties, disposable pants (that fit), snacks, lip balm, hot water bottle, still drinks, maternity pads (lots!), clean comfy pants, camera, breast pads, nursing bra, straws, comfy clothes, baby wipes, pillow, toiletries, money, plus adding dressing gown and slippers.

Thanks ladies xx


----------



## Emerald

Im the exact same wishing I had slept with baby blanket before having my LO.
x


----------



## xpensivtaste

THIS THREAD IS GREAT!! 

here's a little advice from my experience.
if the midwife tells you to lay on your side with your leg propped up and pant like a dog with your tongue out then do it! you might feel a bit daft but i delivered an 8 pound 13 girl with no need for stitches. 
make sure when you need to push but its too early, if you have gas and air to start taking it at the very beginning of your contraction or you may struggle to breath through it.
lipbalm has been mentioned but its a must have IMO. 
baths can make contractions less painful in the early stages and help you to relax.
you are sometimes likely to be given a strip wash by the midwife after delivering, i found this quite funny.
if you are kept in hospital afterwards and are put on the ward, dont expect a good nights sleep! there is always a baby crying during the night, either yours or another new mummy's. i struggled to sleep anyway as i was fixated on my beautiful newborn.


----------



## minime11

That they were going to send me home!,...and that my ds would end up being delivered by paramedics at home!


----------



## DressageDiva

Great post thanks ladies


----------



## hawalkden

Thanks Guys I've just written down about 20 points :) Which I'm going to keep at hand :) x


----------



## mummy2be...

I know this sounds odd but film it! I'd give anything to watch my birth- and if afterwards you regret filming it and don't want it then delete- at least you have the option.

Be prepared for alot of blood! A hell of alot more than I expected. 

Don't have to much planned out because it won't go that way.

When your pushing - literally just try and poo- my LO was out in 45 mins and my midwife I was a perfect pusher after taking her advice of just trying to poo


----------



## lsh2010

Do you actually poo when you give birth as well??? That's something I'm worried about!!!


----------



## MrsPsandQs

lsh2010 said:


> Do you actually poo when you give birth as well??? That's something I'm worried about!!!

Lol I was worried about this... So much so I kept shouting 'oh god, I'm not pooing am I?!' during labour :haha: 
I DID however have to wee on a pad on the floor as I couldn't get to loo and it was that or a catheter... :blush: mortified every time I think about it, the funny thing was my husband had brand new shoes on and I was holding into him thinking 'god he'll kill me if I wee on those!':haha: ( he wouldn't have cared two hootsin reality but still! Lol)


----------



## BrokenfoREVer

Thanks for all the tips ladies  Very helpful for scared newbies like me.


----------



## shelleney

lsh2010 said:


> Do you actually poo when you give birth as well??? That's something I'm worried about!!!

Im pretty sure that the majority of women poo during labour, yes :sick:


----------



## happygal

shelleney said:


> lsh2010 said:
> 
> 
> Do you actually poo when you give birth as well??? That's something I'm worried about!!!
> 
> Im pretty sure that the majority of women poo during labour, yes :sick:Click to expand...

ive given birth twice and didnt poo either time x x


----------



## JoJo_2012

I'd bring a blindfold in in case I want to sleep in the daytime and was in hospital for 6 days in the end.

Also, but this was just a personal choice, as I'm a very light sleeper I'd bring earplugs too, wear both before baby is born then only 1 after baby is born so you can still hear baby but not every pin that drops.


----------



## rihanna

TMI ALERT!!! 

When i was being stitched afterwards i was bleeding so much the midwife needed to insert a 'tampon' to stop the blood flow so she could see......IT WAS THE SIZE OF A DEODORANT CAN!!!!


----------



## shelleney

happygal said:


> shelleney said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lsh2010 said:
> 
> 
> Do you actually poo when you give birth as well??? That's something I'm worried about!!!
> 
> Im pretty sure that the majority of women poo during labour, yes :sick:Click to expand...
> 
> ive given birth twice and didnt poo either time x xClick to expand...

Lucky you! I hope to be just like you, in that respect! :flower:


----------



## ovetta2001

I love that women have to go though 9 months of poking and proding...then a LOAD of people that she doesn't know will stare at her lady garden and her butt hole. She will scream and cry while her vagina gets ripped open for a baby to come out. Then theres the water breaking...the blood...the placenta...


But what do we worry about?

Someone seeing us poo :rofl:


----------



## Parkep

ovetta2001 said:


> I love that women have to go though 9 months of poking and proding...then a LOAD of people that she doesn't know will stare at her lady garden and her butt hole. She will scream and cry while her vagina gets ripped open for a baby to come out. Then theres the water breaking...the blood...the placenta...
> 
> 
> But what do we worry about?
> 
> Someone seeing us poo :rofl:

:rofl: omg so so true!!! I was in the very middle of it all! Back to back labor, forceps the whole bit! And what stands out? That I knew I pooed a bit...(could smell it :blush: not bad just a little before they cleaned it up in ten seconds)


----------



## shelleney

ovetta2001 said:


> I love that women have to go though 9 months of poking and proding...then a LOAD of people that she doesn't know will stare at her lady garden and her butt hole. She will scream and cry while her vagina gets ripped open for a baby to come out. Then theres the water breaking...the blood...the placenta...
> 
> 
> But what do we worry about?
> 
> Someone seeing us poo :rofl:

:rofl:


----------



## famof6

Just curious with all the poo talk:haha:

Do they not make you do a clean out before?I am in the US so maybe its only here but with all 4 of my kids I had to do a enema first thing.I guess if there is no time they wouldn't..

Thanks for all the helpful info most of these things I had forgotten:flower:


----------



## ovetta2001

famof6 said:


> Just curious with all the poo talk:haha:
> 
> Do they not make you do a clean out before?I am in the US so maybe its only here but with all 4 of my kids I had to do a enema first thing.I guess if there is no time they wouldn't..
> 
> Thanks for all the helpful info most of these things I had forgotten:flower:

There is no way in hell that they would make me do an enema with everything else that was going on.

Cheeky sods!


----------



## GingerNut

I didn't have an enema either, it used to be part of childbirth in Ireland but they stopped, thankfully. 

It's going to be messy as hell anyway, why add the extra indignity of an enema?!


----------



## famof6

They may not do them here anymore either not sure it's been a while since I had my last child.I was just wondering if everyone was still pooing after an enema.It did make me miserable with the contractions but my last 2 were induced so had time for it to kick in before the contractions started.Maybe my hospital has cut them out to.


----------



## karla1

this thread is so interesting thanks everyone for the advice


----------



## mancbird

This thread is great :) I'm due in 5 days and have found loads of tips and things I didn't know!


----------



## Novbaby08

that bringing laptop and ipod were useless. Once in full labor your in too much pain to focus on them, and once the baby is born your too busy to care their there


----------



## karla1

bumping as thought it was very useful x


----------



## Tampa

Yep, this is an absolutely genius thread! I'm 4 days late today - so good go know what I'm in for. Cheers to everyone that's contributed! X


----------



## Blizzard

This is really interesting! Seems so far away, I know it'll be here in no time. x


----------



## HellBunny

I was induced and i didn't realise i'd be stuck on the antenatal ward until i was 6cm! (no room in the delivery suite)


----------



## Cat_pj

I wish I'd known that I really didn't mind having internal exam/ people looking at my nooni when in labour (only medical staff, OH was told to stay away!). I know everyone says it but it is so true!!! And that stitches etc were fine, and that I shouldn't have worried about tearing, crowning etc and finally....


That I could do without the epidural!!! I was convinced I would have one, but I didn't have to!!


----------



## lovelylaura

Labour for me personal wasn't that bad I actually enjoyed it lol the stiches was the worst bit bit that's because the numbing injection didn't wotmrk but gas and air was bloody brillient for it lol 

Also if ur like me and don't like other people sheets take a dressing gown so U can have that to snuggle in while ur there , I didn't and really wish I had :( would have made the whole hospital stay so much better good luck to all of U expecting ur babys so jelous xx


----------



## lovelylaura

Sorry about the awful spelling on my phone !


----------



## AdrienMarie

My best advice is to not rely on getting an epidural...prepare yourself just in case! They do not work on everyone...me included!!:cry:


----------



## welshgirl21

Just a quick question - if all is ok with me and the baby can I insist on going home and refuse to stay in hospital? I hate the thought of OH having to go home on his own after becoming a daddy for the first time.

Great thread for us first timers (sorry, I'm kind of board crashing from 2nd tri)

x


----------



## Blizzard

welshgirl21 said:


> Just a quick question - if all is ok with me and the baby can I insist on going home and refuse to stay in hospital? I hate the thought of OH having to go home on his own after becoming a daddy for the first time.
> 
> Great thread for us first timers (sorry, I'm kind of board crashing from 2nd tri)
> 
> x

This is a great question, if anyone knows the answer I'd love to know. Xx


----------



## bumphenders

Blizzard said:


> welshgirl21 said:
> 
> 
> Just a quick question - if all is ok with me and the baby can I insist on going home and refuse to stay in hospital? I hate the thought of OH having to go home on his own after becoming a daddy for the first time.
> 
> Great thread for us first timers (sorry, I'm kind of board crashing from 2nd tri)
> 
> x
> 
> This is a great question, if anyone knows the answer I'd love to know. XxClick to expand...

I've just posted something similar about how I don't want to stay alone...

:flow:


----------



## shelleney

bumphenders said:


> Blizzard said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> welshgirl21 said:
> 
> 
> Just a quick question - if all is ok with me and the baby can I insist on going home and refuse to stay in hospital? I hate the thought of OH having to go home on his own after becoming a daddy for the first time.
> 
> Great thread for us first timers (sorry, I'm kind of board crashing from 2nd tri)
> 
> x
> 
> This is a great question, if anyone knows the answer I'd love to know. XxClick to expand...
> 
> I've just posted something similar about how I don't want to stay alone...
> 
> :flow:Click to expand...

Hi ladies!
i hope my experience can help you...

I gave birth to my baby girl 3 weeks ago. She was born at 7.48pm. I lost 600mls of blood, and had stitches.
The midwives recommended i stay overnight on the ward - because of the blood loss, because it was my first baby, and also because it was late at night.
But i really wanted to go home with my OH, and spend our first night together as a family.
So i told them i was going home! i took a long shower, got myself dressed, and waited for my paperwork to be completed.
At 1am, i was finally discharged, and we all went home together!
It was wonderful to all snuggle up together in our own bed, for our first night as a family.

The hospital staff can only advise you, they cant _make_ you stay overnight.
Good luck to you all!!


----------



## sweet angel

great thread!! enjoyed reading that alot...


----------



## ovetta2001

shelleney said:


> bumphenders said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Blizzard said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> welshgirl21 said:
> 
> 
> Just a quick question - if all is ok with me and the baby can I insist on going home and refuse to stay in hospital? I hate the thought of OH having to go home on his own after becoming a daddy for the first time.
> 
> Great thread for us first timers (sorry, I'm kind of board crashing from 2nd tri)
> 
> x
> 
> This is a great question, if anyone knows the answer I'd love to know. XxClick to expand...
> 
> I've just posted something similar about how I don't want to stay alone...
> 
> :flow:Click to expand...
> 
> Hi ladies!
> i hope my experience can help you...
> 
> I gave birth to my baby girl 3 weeks ago. She was born at 7.48pm. I lost 600mls of blood, and had stitches.
> The midwives recommended i stay overnight on the ward - because of the blood loss, because it was my first baby, and also because it was late at night.
> But i really wanted to go home with my OH, and spend our first night together as a family.
> So i told them i was going home! i took a long shower, got myself dressed, and waited for my paperwork to be completed.
> At 1am, i was finally discharged, and we all went home together!
> It was wonderful to all snuggle up together in our own bed, for our first night as a family.
> 
> The hospital staff can only advise you, they cant _make_ you stay overnight.
> Good luck to you all!!Click to expand...


Also remember it's on you as well if something does happen. I would go home too...but if you got sick or something was up etc there is no blame to be placed on the hospital :)


----------



## shelleney

ovetta2001 said:


> shelleney said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> bumphenders said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Blizzard said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> welshgirl21 said:
> 
> 
> Just a quick question - if all is ok with me and the baby can I insist on going home and refuse to stay in hospital? I hate the thought of OH having to go home on his own after becoming a daddy for the first time.
> 
> Great thread for us first timers (sorry, I'm kind of board crashing from 2nd tri)
> 
> x
> 
> This is a great question, if anyone knows the answer I'd love to know. XxClick to expand...
> 
> I've just posted something similar about how I don't want to stay alone...
> 
> :flow:Click to expand...
> 
> Hi ladies!
> i hope my experience can help you...
> 
> I gave birth to my baby girl 3 weeks ago. She was born at 7.48pm. I lost 600mls of blood, and had stitches.
> The midwives recommended i stay overnight on the ward - because of the blood loss, because it was my first baby, and also because it was late at night.
> But i really wanted to go home with my OH, and spend our first night together as a family.
> So i told them i was going home! i took a long shower, got myself dressed, and waited for my paperwork to be completed.
> At 1am, i was finally discharged, and we all went home together!
> It was wonderful to all snuggle up together in our own bed, for our first night as a family.
> 
> The hospital staff can only advise you, they cant _make_ you stay overnight.
> Good luck to you all!!Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Also remember it's on you as well if something does happen. I would go home too...but if you got sick or something was up etc there is no blame to be placed on the hospital :)Click to expand...

Oh yes, i agree :)


----------



## angel2010

I wish I'd have known that inductions lead to more interventions.


----------



## lucy_x

That i had a choice :( - i didnt realise i could say no when the wanted to do something e.g. examine me, up my induction drip - the induction at all for that matter.)


----------



## FunkyVine

I read this about Pethidine.... Any thoughts? - 'The drug can reduce anxiety, and although it may not directly reduce pain, it is thought to increase pain tolerance'

Also what baby clothes should we take to the hospital?


----------



## shelleney

I had pethidine 7 weeks ago. but i cant really describe what effect it has on you. its strange. i still felt every contraction, and they were still very painful. but i felt kinda drunk and spaced out, so i wasnt really as affected by the pains as i had been before the pethidine.
sorry if that doesnt make any sense, its just so hard to explain... :shrug:


----------



## modo

That an induction at 39 weeks would fail and that my consultant did not have my best interests as his first priority.


----------



## BrokenfoREVer

That no matter how hard or painful your labour & birth might be, you will forget it all in an instant when you see your baby


----------



## FunkyVine

shelleney said:


> I had pethidine 7 weeks ago. but i cant really describe what effect it has on you. its strange. i still felt every contraction, and they were still very painful. but i felt kinda drunk and spaced out, so i wasnt really as affected by the pains as i had been before the pethidine.
> sorry if that doesnt make any sense, its just so hard to explain... :shrug:

The thought of feeling drunk and spaced out seems rather appealing after not drinking for 7 months! Today I really fancied mulled wine - and I can't wait to have some champers after the baby is born! 
Congrats on your little one x :flower:


----------



## shelleney

I would recommend it, as the end of my labour was much more bearable than the beginning. plus, your midwife and OH will get a right laugh watching and listening to your drunken antics! :haha:
And thanks for the congrats....good luck to you! :flower:


----------



## Leopard

I'd taken 10L of ice coffee with me, in between contractions all I seemed to want was ice coffee :haha:
Also I didn't need as many maternity pads as i was leg to believe, and wish I'd only had one packed of them and a couple of packets of liners, since I was loosing only lineramount within a day and a half and it sure would have saved room in my bag!
I wish our camera hadn't got stolen. So should have asked the MW to take pictures, thank god for DF's phone!


----------



## Eleanor ace

I wish I'd known that labor was going to be such an amazing experience! I was looking forward to it, but I was a little scared, but I didn't need to be :cloud9:. I can't wait to do it again :haha:. I wish I'd known my own mind better and reminded the MW that I wanted a water birth as by the time I remembered I was in L&D and on a hospital bed and didn't want to make a fuss. 
That's my main piece of advice; know what you want and make it known. Obviously be prepared to adapt your plans if you need to but if you can have what you'd like then make sure you do.


----------



## MeowPurr32

Thanks for the information... bumping this great thread! It's been awhile!


----------



## FunkyVine

This is a really useful thread. It helped me so much to prepare myself for the whole hospital experience. I was so relaxed at the final stages and had a really quick and not too stressful birth!


----------



## luci and bump

This thread is amazing! Thank you to whoever bumped it up! 
I never realised I would give birth, and then my OH would have to go home without us!! I don't want that at all!! There used to be a hospital in Llandough that had double beds, so your partner could stay the night, but they had to close the l&d ward due to lack of funding. I don't want him to have to spend his first night as a daddy without his baby :(


----------



## Sommerfugl

I wish I'd have known..

That having contractions less than 5 minutes apart from the start doesn't necessarily mean that you're going to give birth soon

That I wouldn't need so many clothes for LO

That I'd need MY OWN knickers _easily_ to hand after birth so as not to be rushed and manhandled into the hospitals TINY pair of disposible knickers with maternity pad

To wear something suitable for the birthing pool, a cotton top was a bad idea

TMI - that it's apparently normal to feel like your bumhole is being ripped apart during labour. I was NOT prepared for this sensation and felt like something was terribly wrong. 

I wish I'd have been mentally prepared for the afterpains, and how knackered I would feel afterwards. 

I wish I'd have been more prepared with giving people instructions on where my camera was and how to operate it, I had a midwife kindly take a few pics on my mobile but it wasn't great quality.


----------



## BrokenfoREVer

I wish I'd been told how empty I would feel when I first stood up. It's very odd.


----------



## Gemmamuk

BrokenfoREVer said:


> I wish I'd been told how empty I would feel when I first stood up. It's very odd.

Omg your right - such a strange sensation! My breathing was funny - obv where my son had been slowly squashing my lungs. I kept feeling so faint and light headed from this feeling!


----------



## Vesta

I wished I'd known that once you pop that baby out, you're on your own. The midwives are too busy to offer any support. Even if you're in the hospital for 5 days like I was!


----------



## CatandKitten

You will not use (or want to use) 99% of what you pack.


----------



## LouLou78

Good thread. Some good points on here. Also, read up on the birthing partner policy to save dissapointment. Its written everywhere in our unit and in the notes that only two birthing partners are allowed in with you on the delivery suite here. If you don't, be prepared for the dissapointment when your extra birthing partners are sent away. There isnt much room in the labour rooms at my unit and everyone is tripping over each other at the best of times with just the 2 birthing partners. :)


----------



## Rhio92

Vesta said:


> I wished I'd known that once you pop that baby out, you're on your own. The midwives are too busy to offer any support. Even if you're in the hospital for 5 days like I was!

It depends where you give birth I guess... I had loads of help and support from the midwives in the 3 days we were in hospital x


----------



## missvikki

How much you bleed afterwards! 
I couldn't believe it but after 2 weeks it has almost stopped :)

I wish I had put my foot down and said no to some of my visitors. The first week was exhausting enough without having to entertain guests. Be brave and say no! People can wait :) 

I wish I had wrote down the names of the midwives who delivered her so I could have sent a card, theres that many names in my notes I don't know which ones it was :( 

I wish I didn't feel the pressure to buy the hospital photo, I took much nicer ones myself :)


----------



## FunkyVine

I agree! We said no to the Bounty lady, and no to visitors!!


----------



## rockabillymom

I wish I had brought more to do after having my baby. We spend a lot of time in the nursery since she was premie but the times we had to go back to our rooms we were bored as hell and couldnt leave the hospital. I also would have brought a larger suitcase with the gifts and the things the doctor had us bring home it took 3 trip to the car to just get everything out. I also would recommend bring very comfy clothes. I only brought one outfit and forgot a bra so I was very uncomfortable until DH brough me more clothes. 

Oh and lots of pictures are taken with visitors so if you normally wear makeup id recommending bring a few basics.


----------



## Leopard

I wish I'd known that they had Subway down stairs; I would have taken more money!
I also wish I'd known to take smaller clothes; she wasnt very big.


----------



## Kage76

that they had the wards sooooo hot to keep the babies warm- all i packed was long pj's and warm dressing gowns. I should have packed light weight summer pj's instead


----------



## Scamp

Fantastic thread, I've just read all of it x


----------



## Ginag88

Read through the whole thread! Loved it!


----------



## Leopard

Kage76 said:


> that they had the wards sooooo hot to keep the babies warm- all i packed was long pj's and warm dressing gowns. I should have packed light weight summer pj's instead

Our maternity ward was actually quite cool from high air conditioning :shrug:


----------



## LostAndAlone

havent read every page so dont know if someone has already said but, especially if youve had a tear or stitches, when going to pee it will sting like hell so the only thing i found that relieved this for me was filling a cup or bottle with slightly warm water and pouring it down over "myself" as i peed, i didnt feel a thing !!!


----------



## izzlesnizzle

Excellent thread. Just read every page and written lots of notes!


----------



## ProudMomma2Be

Thank you all ! Some stuff really scared me but I think a lot of it prepared me for ,,everything,, :)


----------



## Bats11

The one thing I have learnt is to be firm with what you want, I asked for the epidural both times and the midwife convinced me out of it, so this time I know to stand my ground and demand one.


----------



## LisK

This thread is super helpful!


----------



## vixxen

I don't know if this has been touched on but take in juice or somthing to help get your bowels moving again as constipation after giving birth is TRAUMATIC,:blush: like giving birth again!


----------



## vixxen

especially if you had stitches!:dohh:


----------



## Bats11

Oh yes I totally agree, I had 17 stitches with my second daughter and going to the toilet was not fun.


----------



## arj

I wish I knew more about what was happening. They have secret code language so you can't understand. 
I only know what position my baby was in and that I was given syntocinon and that my babies shoulders were stuck, because I read my notes afterward. They tend to make decisions and not tell you whats going on.

Second time round I did my research, so when a MW said "baby ROP" and "ARM" I knew it meant that my baby was posterior (sunny side up) and and they were going to artificially rupture my waters. And things like that. Knowledge is power!


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## arj

Oh and also to bring DARK coloured trousers! I leaked through my pad and thru my pants on the transfer to the after care centre, and luckily was wearing black (I also brang grey pants with me and the nurse pulled them out of my bag for me to wear and I told her to give me the black ones just in case...)

And bring snacks! They can be useless in bringing nice food. Museli bars and fruit and nice water is a must have!


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## NuKe

i wish id known that 1 in 10 epidurals doesn't work! i was that 1 in 10...


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## katlin

Ok I have a few if your already in labor you don't have to have the drip "to speed things up"its taken mine months to get here why rush the end.
That if you tear it hurts really bad after I recommend opening a few pads and pouring about a quarter cup of water in them and put them in the freezer the cold is heavily on a sore vag.
Make sure your partner knows what you want they almost clamped the cord and he stopped them they had never heard of delayed cord clamping and were stunned with the results.
They can be quite rushed with breast feeding push if you need the help don't be ashamed sometimes it just doesn't come to you.
Meconium is very sticky I've always got the nurses to clean it off lol.


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## 00Melmel00

I wish I'd known just how long you will be at hosp for so could have gone in a while later. (Was 7cm when went in then took from noon til 11pm for DD to be born) Also wish I'd knew to take some food with me and lipsil. Also that you wont always be able to get what you want. And that, there will probably be some really b**chy midwives that you have to stand up to. Fingers crossed this time around I dont get an awful midwife on the ward after who told me that 'if I cant breastfeed without help then maybe I should try bottle feeding?!' huh! Anyways goodluck


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## lovelylisa84

I wish
I would have known to request a private room
had a doula
brought my own toiletries
Not agreed to induction unless absoltely medically necessary
not agreed to more pitocin


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## JaanRuk

awsome thread! helps alot :)


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## TMT2012plus1

Awesome thread! :) I'm still super early, but I've been so curious lately! :thumbup:


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## MoonLove

TAKE LOADS AND LOADS OF YOUR OWN CLOTHES!

I had a normal labour, but i ended up having a emergency c-sec because baby wasn't budging. I had in no way planned for this, and i had to stay in hospital for 6 days afterwards. 

There is nothing that makes you feel less at home in a hospital than not being able to wear your own clothes. I ended up wearing my husbands shirts and my Dad's t-shirts because mine were all dirty after sleeping in them. I felt gross and so far away from home, i couldn't wear any pants or trousers because of my scar for the first few days and i was just there in my Dad's t-shirt with my bum out :haha: 


I look back at the pictures of me holding baby in other people's clothes and i cringe! Its just a little thing, but i wish i had of known. They encourage you to get out of the hospital gowns after a few days, so even if you don't take a great deal of clothes, make sure your husband/family know which clothes you have as 'back-up' at home, so they can bring them in for you if you need them! 

:flower:


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## gretavon

That labor can be a blast and that laughter actually helps you labor. You don't have to be quiet and serious and hyper-focused.


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## willowblossom

bring lots and lots of maternity pads, i got through so many! take dark clothes and old knickers! oh, and lanolin nipple cream was a godsend! x


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## sammy10kids

I havent read it all as on my phone. But relaxing and breathing is the key. Also have your very first wee in the bath or shower after the birth. Sounds disgusting but believe me the bath will be like the red sea anyway and the water eases any stinging x


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## Amethyste

Do not wait too long !!! My contractions were 7to 8min appart, lasted 40 sec and the midwife tolde me 5 min 1 minute long. I was 9 cm when the midwife arrived (i only rang the midwife because contractions were becoming too painful). I pushed straight away when i arrived at hospital and she was out 1h later. Also, i gave birth on the side, i had a glass of water and OH was giving me water through each contraction with a straw. It really help me, i was soo thirsty !!! I had a wet cloth on me too.


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## Emerald87

Following to get more tips.


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## Betheney

i wished i'd learnt some pain management techniques before labour, i always assumed the midwives were there and they would coach me through it and help me out... they didn't. They stuck me in a room and left me to my own devices for hours on end and just came in to check me every hour or so. I had no idea how to deal with the pain, i didn't know to find a focus point, to ignore bad thoughts, to concentrate on breathing during a contraction. I tried different positions myself but had no help or suggestions from the MW (i never found a good position.) So it meant i'd spent the whole time i was in labour with erratic, hysterical, traumatised thoughts. I kept telling myself i was going to pass out from the pain, i kept telling myself i was going to die from shock, i was 100% absolutely beside myself for hours.

I wish'd i'd prepared myself for the pain better... i just had no idea the midwives wouldn't be there to help me except for when i was pushing. I thought they'd be there with suggestions and to calm me down when i got hysterical... they weren't.

I always told myself "sure it'll hurt but your body will know what to do" and so didn't bother researching labour techniques. I thought reading birth stories and knowing the process of labour was enough... it wasn't.


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## Arisa

I was given massive maternity pads from friends instead of the ones the hospital give you as the big ones are more like nappies lol but they are good for the first two days post partum and if you have given birth via section then you only need normal maternity pads, or overnight sanitary pads but after a vaginal birth? I was told that you need heavy grade maternity pads or even those incontinence pads as they cover heaps of blood and are brilliant


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## Beanonorder

Thanks for all the advice! Being prepared is definitely key!


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## shelleney

That I wouldn't need the big t-shirt/nightie I had packed to wear during labour. I was so damn hot and sweaty, I just wanted to be naked. So I stripped off, and spent most if my labour completely starkers (much to my fiance's embarassment!) :haha:


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## modo

To pack my hospital bag earlier as it was possible for me to give birth at 39 weeks 3 Days :haha:


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## minimoo90

I wish I'd of known that once you get an epidural n drip you can't eat :( I would of pigged out more before getting to the hospital :(


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## .rollinn.

- I wish i someone informed me i wouldn't be able to walk for 3 hours after my epi.

- It would have been great to know ahead of time i had to wait for that drip of whatever it was to empty for getting the epi. I was in so much pain i wanted to squeeze it all out.

- The worst was when i felt like my epi was wearing off,so i acted like a idiot begging them to just cut me open. When it was only pressure pain from the head. lol


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## XJessicaX

I wish I had spent my labour on all fours the second I started experiencing back labour. Maybe my LO would have turned and positioned herself correctly. It was excruciating. The midwives didn't even suggest it when I was eventually admitted! They just felt my belly and said "oh, she's back to back" and that was it. 
Next time I will probably labour on all fours just to reduce the chance of her turning posterior.


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## Swinx

This is all such great advice! I need to start writing a list. :winkwink:


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## Impet Limpet

What an awesome thread!


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