# WWYD? TTC after egg donation..



## lovetocruise

First off, HI! I'm new here:) I can't believe there is a whole forum just for those of us want to be moms, but are not yet TTC, I love it!

Background: I'm 25, OH is 27, have been together for 9 years, married for 4. We have both agreed that we are ready to be parents! I've been psychologically ready for awhile, took OH a few years to catch up and I am so glad he has:thumbup:

I am an egg donor and am under contract with a couple currently, with retrieval set for mid-October. We'd like to start actively trying after that. 
Here's the dilemma: If we start trying immediately after the procedure I can pretty well be guaranteed a pregnancy because of all the fertility drugs in my system, which seems perfect, except for that we would have a high risk for multiples. They recommend waiting until after the first period to eliminate that risk. I could handle twins, but have a fear of conceiving 3, 4, or more, obviously.

So what would you do? Start trying immediately (and risk multiples), or wait and hope it doesn't take too long to conceive? I'm really torn on this...


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## Reidfidleir

Sounds like you should heed the recommendations and wait. It's hard, but you've waited this long already, right? Allow your body time to readjust and get back to normal first.


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## lozzy21

I think I'd just go ahead and start. Not to put a dampner on things but even with a healthy couple who have sex at the right time you only have a 25% chance of conceiving.


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## lovetocruise

lozzy21 said:


> I think I'd just go ahead and start. Not to put a dampner on things but even with a healthy couple who have sex at the right time you only have a 25% chance of conceiving.

That's kinda what I've been thinking..I know it takes some women several months or more and I know every month AF returns, I'll just get more stressed out. Trying the same month as retrieval will give us a step up and hopefully take away the stress of TTC month after month. 
Also, I only want 2-3 kids total and I wouldn't mind only going through one pregnancy instead of 2. 
I'm just a little afraid of conceiving more than 3 or more...


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## itsnowmyturn

First of all can I say good for u for helping others out who are less fortunate ur a real inspiration and u should be very proud if urself.

I wud personally risk it and TTC that month, if u feel u cud cope with multiples then why not, I'm sure more than twins wud be hard and wud near on bankrupt me but the joy I wud get from it wud outweigh it. I personally wud c it as my chance to benefit from the help I'd been givin others with the fertility drugs and such, surely it gives u a better chance and who wud want to pass up on that? If excessive multiples happen u can deal with that when that occurs xx


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## Cowgirl07

I personally would go for it. Granted we have been trying for awhile and had no results, but if you feel you could handle multiples why not? You might not conceive and how would you feel about waiting another month or two for you body to cycle the drugs out?


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## Yipee

If it were me, I would wait. I always feel that it's better to let things happen naturally. I've seen so many stories on here of people getting pregnant with twins (usually due to fertility drugs) and then losing one twin. That would be heartbreaking, even if it happened early on. And as adorable as twins are, it's much more likely to be a complicated pregnancy than a natural singleton pregnancy. And of course risk of complications increase when you have triplets or more. I would do a lot of research on what a pregnancy with multiples really means, before taking that step. 

If there's no reason to believe you have fertility problems, I would not choose to conceive with fertility drugs. The truth is, most people don't have any trouble conceiving, especially at your age. I'm 31, my husband is 42, and I got pregnant on my second cycle of NTNP. I have a friend a few years older than me, who has been accidentally getting pregnant almost every time she has unprotected sex. She and her husband now has a 2 1/2-year-old, a 1-year-old, and she is pregnant with her 3rd. Yes, some people have problems, but for most, it's actually pretty easy and natural, hence the wide range of contraceptives available.


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## lovetocruise

I'm getting really mixed responses here which I guess I wasn't expecting. There are so many factors to consider, but right now, I think it would be less stressful to handle a twin pregnancy than to TTC for a few months without success....
I'm also going to have to see how OH feels about it. He's asked that I give the baby talk a break for now as too much gives him anxiety. I'll discuss it with him close to the donation dates.


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## Symphony7

I wouldn't do it, personally. The financial burden along with the emotional turmoil of three or more at once would not be worth it to me. I really don't want more than one at a time though, really under any circumstances. I think everyone on here sees so many stories of difficulty TTC and so they get afraid of not being able to get pregnant. If you are young and healthy and even able to donate eggs I think you should have no trouble getting pregnant. Maybe not right away, but within a year at least.


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## Amalee

I'd give it a month, personally - I love kids, but I would not want to be Octo-mom! But whatever you guys are comfortable with :)


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## Hollynesss

Kudos to you for helping couples who are not able to conceive themselves!! What a wonderful thing you are doing :)

I would go for it! I am secretly hoping for twins on the first go, so to me it would be exciting!

Really I think if you and your husband are okay with the possibility of multiples, and could handle it financially, then I would say go for it. As a pp already mentioned, you only have a 20-25% chance each cycle of conceiving, so there is good chance you wouldn't have anything to worry about anyway :) Yes, the fertility drugs will help your chances, but it still is not a guarantee.


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## lovetocruise

Thanks for all the advice, feel free to keep sharing. I love getting others' opinions. Right now, I am leaning towards not waiting...and seeing what happens. I know that may seem crazy, but I'm not a patient person by nature and I'm not sure what 3+ months of BFN's will do to my sanity. This just seems like an easy way out of that..maybe..


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## fashionqueen

I would wait & for 1 reason only.

Multiple pregnancies are risky. Even twin ones.

I would be terrified of getting pregnant with twins not because of the financial or practical problems because those are in my control, but the increased risk of premature labour or miscarriage is not.

Having a miscarriage and then being pregnant with one baby is stressful I'm terrified of it happening again. The thought of it being an increased risk would be even worse.

One month is nothing in ttc. Just wait! It's 4 weeks you'll deal. Much better than possible get pregnant straight away but then say loose 3 babies, that would be a much bigger regret x


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## lovetocruise

OH and I test drove the car he wants last night and it will barely fit one infant carseat and definitely no more. So that, among other reasons, helped make our decision. 
We will wait until I get my October period and start trying November. That really is not very far off considering I've been brooding for a couple years now. I think reading all these TTC forums makes me nervous about how long it could take to conceive. I'm a planner by nature and ultimately want an August 2014 baby, and knowing that may not happen stresses me out a little. 
Thanks for the advice, it was very appreciated and really helped me to consider some things that I hadn't before. 
So here's to praying that it won't take too long to get pregnant once we start trying. Maybe the fertility treatments from the month before will still be helpful in our TTC journey:rolleyes:


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