# TTC - ectopic survivor - one tube!



## breakingdawn

Hi everyone! It has been a long time since I have been in this forum. Although my loss has not been recent, it was devastating. I have a journal if anyone else shares a similar story and would like to read it. In short, I had an ectopic pregnancy in September of 2011. I almost died and did lose my right tube in the process. By a miracle I did get pregnant a month later with a healthy girl who is now going on 4 years old! I have another daughter who is going on 8. We decided to give it one last go for a boy (but a healthy baby would be fine too). I am concerned because I am older now, do have one tube, and there is always the risk of another ectopic. I posted in the one tubers forum but seems it is not very active anymore. I just wanted to say hello to anyone else out there who has experienced an ectopic, losing a tube, or a loss in general. I wish all of you the best of luck in your TTC journey! :hugs:


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## BronteForever

Hey Breakingdawn, I posted in the one tubers area too but this might be the better place since that's not as active anymore. But best wishes on your journey. I lost my left tube in April 2009 after an ectopic pregnancy. It was a very tramatic experience for me as well since I was sent home from the hospital after my tube had ruptured because they misread my ultrasound. They called me back the next day and rushed me into surgery but it was quite the ordeal. We definetly weren't ready to TTC yet and waited about 3 years. Nothing has happened since then and a recent HSG test showed my other tube is likely blocked from scar tissue. Now I'm mad I waited so long but can't do anything but move forward. Likely to IVF. My RE appointment isn't until May. In the meantime we are still trying but I'm not really hopeful. 

But I'd love to follow you and wish you lots of success. Looks like you have a great track record with only having one tube. So hopefully it doesn't take very long.


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## breakingdawn

Mine was also very traumatic. I knew from the beginning it was an ectopic but no one believed me. :. My hcg was just never right and I kept having pain on my right side. Sadly when they found out after a dnc and methotrexate it was too late. My tube ruptured, I had internal bleeding, and it was an emergency surgery on labor day weekend. :( I do still worry about scar tissue being on my other tube now since it has been a while since I had my last daughter. I am trying not to over think anything, especially since we just started trying again. I am definitely a little nervous. I would love to follow your journey, feel free to post here and keep me updated! Maybe we can find some other ladies in the same boat. :)


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## GI_Jane

Hi ladies...
My ectopic was oct 2014 and was quite traumatic too...was told it was a miscarriage- nothing seen on Ultrasound but so much pain on my right side and HCG not going down. 3 weeks later of HCG monitoring and awful on/off pain they decided to operate and found internal bleeding and a twisted up tube which they removed. And to think the doctor said it was pain from constipation caused by the pain killers I had been popping! They would not listen until I was lucky and saw a different doctor!

Fast forward and we've been TTC but no luck (I also have PCOS which complicates things). A HCG this January showed my remaining tube looks clear. So the next step for us is clomid.

Breaking dawn how encouraging that you got pregnant a month after tube removal! I didn't think you were allowed to TTC so soon after having methotrexate? If you're worried about scar tissue could you ask for a HSG.

Bronteforever I certainly understand you waiting to TTC. Its taken a while for me to get over it too..not just losing the baby but the whole ordeal of having the ectopic diagnosed and treated.

Good luck ladies and happy trying!


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## breakingdawn

Hey there! Fortunately methotrexate had no effects whatsoever. We actually were not even TTC that month. I wasn't charting or even really paying attention to O. It was a miracle. But she's a happy and healthy 3 year old! I think we will give it 6 months or so. If no baby luck I will try the hsg. But honestly since we already have two kids we won't go through IVF or anything substantial. This is just really a last attempt to try for a boy because we both would love one!


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## BronteForever

You'd think they'd have a better way to diagnose these by now. Goodness. 

I've had bad ovulation pains for a few years which is one of the reasons they suspected scar tissue. I also just found out my ectopic was in my left tube. I was under the impression since 2009 it was in the right since that's were my scar is. Makes so much more sense with pains I've had since then. But do either of you know if it's common to enter the opposite side to get to the tube? I'm assuming that is what has led to more of my current issues. 

Breaking Dawn - you might not even need an HSG test then unless you want to know. Sometimes knowing is easier than just wondering. 

Hey Gi-Jane. Good thing you trusted your gut and found a new doctor. After my experience I also figured out those two things are super important! Good luck on Clomid!


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## breakingdawn

Hmm interesting. My doctor did say that despite my right tube being gone... the egg can get picked up still by the left tube?? I had no idea about that.... and honestly I never tried to google it because I figured he was pretty knowledgeable since he has been in all sorts of books/magazines for women's research in the OBGYN field! :O


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## BronteForever

Yeah my doctor said that as well Breakingdawn. I found it fascinating that it could happen that way but I guess it makes sense. 

I was just meaning for surgery. Are your ladies scars from your surgery on the same side as the tube you lost?


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## breakingdawn

My scar tissue he said was on the side with my bad (right) tube. He said removing the tube removed all of the scar tissue. But what's to say my left tube does not have scar tissue now from the last c section? You know? I am trying hard not to think about it because the thought of another ectopic terrifies me. But I know my doctor would be more proactive this time and we could catch it a lot sooner so hopefully I would never have to go through what I went through again.


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## BronteForever

Totally get it now! So you had scar tissue prior to your ectopic which caused it. Makes sense. Mine is the opposite. They never found any reason for it and think it just happened and I've developed all the scar tissue since my ectopic surgery itself. 

It's hard not to worry. There are so many unknowns. But you've had a healthy pregnancy since then so lots of stuff are in your favor!

I wish you both success. Currently I'm hoping somehow the HSG test cleared out some of the scar tissue.


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## breakingdawn

Yes mam. Apparently I had old scar tissue on my right tube (possibly from my first c section) and they are fairly certain that is what caused my ectopic. I wish you the best of luck! I have heard the HSG test can actually clear your tubes pretty well! I am hoping that is the case for you. :)


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## mod19

Hey guys can I join?

I had my first ectopic that ruptured in 2007. I was young and dumb, but I still new something wasn't right because I bled the whole time. When they found it, it was about to rupture, but I had to wait for the surgery for another woman whose had already. By the time I got into surgery mine had too (go figure). They repaired the tube and sent me on my way. The next day I was rushed to the er and had to have the same surgery again because not everything was sewn up correctly and I had internal bleeding...fun!

After about 4 years of trying dh and I decided to get help. The dr sent me right to have an hsg done which showed a blocked right tube, which I already knew. We got pregnant that cycle which ended up ectopic again, so my new Dr removed it along with my right tube on April 25, 2014. I tracked my cycles for 2 months with opks and she gave me clomid for the 3rd cycle and we got pregnant! And now I have a beautiful little girl who is about to be 11 months old, born on April 25, 2015. Exactly 1 year later :)

2 months after having her I got pregnant again, but was (cannot remember the name of it for the life of me) unviable. There was a sack and a placenta, but no baby. Had to have laprascopic surgery again at 12 weeks since I wasn't miscarrying on my own and I had a grapefruit sized cyst on my ovary.

So here I am. CD5 of month 1 ttc #2. If nothing happens 's by June when I'm due for my yearly visit I'm going to ask my Dr for clomid again. She told me clomid is good at targeting a functioning side to ovulate from. I will be using opks until then and walk in prepared if we are unsuccessful by then.


Sorry for the book


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## breakingdawn

Hey and welcome! Of course you can join! Wow, it sounds like you have had a tough journey as well. By the time I finally had surgery my tube had long since ruptured and I think he said I had 3 or 4 cups of internal bleeding. It was severe. I was very close to dying. :( I am honestly thankful to be alive. I hope your journey is short and without any issues! Feel free to update in here as often as you like. I am not telling any friends or family we are trying for a final baby so this group is really all I have. I have told one friend outside of bnb but we actually met here. :)


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## mod19

I have actually told a few people this time. I didn't the first time and suffered in silence. I think I'm going to try soy iso next cycle just to see what happens. 

I hope everyone here doesn't have any further issues. I think the surgery is worse than a miscarriage imo. Instead of seeing blood you prep for hours (usually) knowing the outcome and when you wake up its the worst feeling. Hopefully our lack of tunes doesn't hinder any of us!

Has anyone else here used clomid?


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## breakingdawn

I have no experience here with clomid but maybe someone else can chime in? I agree, surgery was hard. My ectopic surgery and loss was one day before my husband's birthday. However, our daughter whom we conceived one month after our loss, was born one month early, on Father's Day.


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## BronteForever

Hey Mod19, welcome to this small group. Sounds like you have had quite the journey. Good luck this time around. I have also heard Clomid is good to help essentially trick the correct ovary to ovulate. I've also heard your good tube can pick up the egg even from the other ovary. So you all have an excellent shot. 

My remaining tube is blocked so I'm not sure what all my options are besides IVF. I don't have an appointment until May with the RE where we'll discuss everything. Based on where it's blocked at I don't think there are many options which is frustrating.


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## BronteForever

And I agree surgery was hard. You not only have to deal with a loss but also with the potential for it to affect your future fertility and that's a lot to handle all at once. Plus it sounds like everyone here had an extra hard time before surgery because of misdiagnosis, doctor error, or from having to wait for surgery. 

Before my ectopic I was much more trusting of doctors (when I managed to go at all) and now I like to get second or third opinions and have learned to trust my gut more.


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## breakingdawn

I couldn't agree with you more about trusting your own gut when it comes to doctors and diagnosees. I really hope things work in your favor, I will certainly be keeping you in my thoughts.


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## mod19

BronteForever said:


> And I agree surgery was hard. You not only have to deal with a loss but also with the potential for it to affect your future fertility and that's a lot to handle all at once. Plus it sounds like everyone here had an extra hard time before surgery because of misdiagnosis, doctor error, or from having to wait for surgery.
> 
> Before my ectopic I was much more trusting of doctors (when I managed to go at all) and now I like to get second or third opinions and have learned to trust my gut more.

Completely agree!

I've been lucky enough to find a Dr that is sympathetic and gets me in asap after a positive test. She does early scans with me until a heartbeat is detected. With my last loss I called about brown spotting and she said to come right in for a reassurance scan. 

It sucks that Ivf may be your only option. I'm sorry, I can't even imagine how that must feel. May seems so far away, but it'll be here before you know it and will be able to move forward. I'm not sure where you're located, but there are a few states that are required to offer infertility insurance. Of course it's something you have to obtain on your own, but I'm sure it's better than covering everything out of pocket. I started looking into it before I met my current dr, and the one before her was quick to mention a fertility specialisr. Ugh. Men should not be in that profession.


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## breakingdawn

So, I know the odds of me being pregnant right off the pill at age 35 with one tube are slim to none but I thought I would just make note.. I am having the same weird symptoms this month as I did when I got pregnant with my last daughter. Headaches, some back pain now, and my nose is all stuffy like I am getting a cold but not really. Then this morning I had an odd pregnancy dream. I had two of those before I found out I was pregnant with Alice. Again, not reading much into this, just thought it was interesting. :huh:


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## GI_Jane

Ooo you never know...what dpo are you? When will you test?

Mod your experience sounds horrible. Promising that clomid worked for you in the past. Clomid is my next step too.


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## BronteForever

It's definitely possible, Breakingdawn. Those are all good signs, especially since you had similar symptoms with your previous pregnancy. Fingers crossed for you!

GI_Jane: Good luck on Clomid if that's your next step. Hope it works for you. Sounds like it has helped others.

Mod: Thanks so much for the kind wishes. IVF does seem very daunting. Unfortunately, I live in Indiana, so it doesn't require infertility insurance, so everything will be out of pocket (or in our case borrowing it and paying back). So that's so intimidating to pay that much and not even potentially have a child at the end of it. We are also very open to adoption and have considered that path. While it can be a similar cost, we might be more guaranteed a child. But that path seems so daunting as well. Plus, right now, I'm just mad at everything. Mad at myself for not trying to get pregnant sooner when I might have had a better shot, mad I didn't get checked out sooner, and mad at the doctor for potentially helping to give me worse scar tissue by going in my good side. I've heard if you want to adopt you need to have fully grieved the possibility of not having your own children and I don't think I've done that, so I don't think it would be fair to do that path yet. For now, I feel mad enough at myself that I'm trying to fix everything as much as I can and for me that's likely IVF. But who knows what the future holds.


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## mod19

Breakingdawn you never know! I remember a stuffy nose being my first symptom with my daughter too. I hope this means good things for you. 

Bronte I'm sorry. It must be so frustrating. I think all of us that have issues conceiving are mad at ourselves for not trying sooner. But unfortunately there's nothing that can be done about that at this point and we need to move forward, even if it does mean paying back a small fortune without any promise of a positive outcome. Do what you gotta do, right? 

GI Jane I was surprised it worked first try for me. It was a couple extra appointments but it was cool to see how many eggs I was going to release (even though I was told none lol)


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## BronteForever

Mod19: so very true. Nothing to do but move on. But it is comforting in some way to know that I'm not the only one that's gotten incredibly mad at myself. We shouldn't take it out on ourselves, but it's hard not too. However, I feel like I'm in a great place right now and making positive steps toward the future and very excited for what it holds!


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## breakingdawn

I have no idea what dpo I am. I was trying so hard to not worry about it! I wasn't even going to test unless I was late. Lol! I am maybe around 6-7 DPO at most? But this is when symptoms started for me last time. It's probably my body playing tricks on me which is not fair since I wasn't thinking about it at all! But first I started getting headaches... Then my nose, then my back, and after my dream this morning I was like "ok this is quite enough!" :haha:


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## BronteForever

Breakingdawn - good luck. It's so hard not to look at every little symptom, especially when you are trying your hardest not to read into everything. Hang in there. Sounds like you are getting closer to when you can test. Yay!


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## breakingdawn

I'm just going to pass the time and not worry about it. I'll wait until I'm a day late before I test if I have no AF symptoms. I hate wasting tests and of course being disappointed.


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## breakingdawn

No idea what dpo I am. Lol. 8? 9? Have all the usual AF symptoms though. Cramping off and on, a good bit of back pain, sore bbs and moody. Fairy survey AF is on the way but I may test on Tuesday for fun if nothing is here. Technically it's due Wednesday.


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## mod19

Heyou I usually test for fun a day or so before af is due...you know...just in case :). Plus the tests are just 88 cents at Walmart so why not?


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## BronteForever

It is so hard because AF symptoms are so similar to early pregnancy ones. It would be much simpler if they weren't  But I've still got my fingers crossed for you that it's a lucky cycle!! 

I always tested early too like a bad girl. It's so hard to resist.


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## breakingdawn

I found 20 Wondfo pregnancy tests on amazin for 11.99 so I think I will get those. :) Those are the same tests I used with #1 and #2 and they picked up a BFP at just 9 DPO. But I really would like to hold out until Tuesday, if possible!


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## BronteForever

Stay strong then if you want to hold out. I've used the Wondfo ones too and they seem to work fine and are super cheap!


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## breakingdawn

If anything I'll do it Tuesday but I'll see if I can wait this time!


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## breakingdawn

Ya'll I feel terrible!! :nope: Headache again and it feels like AF is coming at ANY second even though it is still 5 days away! Why!? :growlmad:

Ugh... this cycle is NOT going to be pleasant.. if it is coming.:grr:


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## BronteForever

I'm so sorry Breakingdawn. Hang in there. I just started AF but it's my first since my HSG test so I've been having lots of pain as well. Sometimes being a woman sucks. But if it's still early those could all be good signs for you.


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## breakingdawn

AF shouldn't be here until Wednesday. But I know AF symptoms can be 1 or even 2 weeks before. Hopefully it is not too awful. Goodness. When I was on the pill I had NO symptoms. I miss that, lol!


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## mod19

I never used to have af symptoms until a few hours before she arrived...now since having dd I get them a few days before, so needless to say I can prepare myself. Stupid af


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## breakingdawn

I'm somewhere around 11 DPO? I'm extremely dizzy and nauseous. I'm chalking this up to a possible stomach bug coming because I just think it's too early for any hcg to be bothering me. I'm considering testing tomorrow morning or Tuesday morning. AF is due Wednesday.


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## BronteForever

Yay for testing. Fingers crossed for you!!!


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## breakingdawn

Ok I may be out? I don't know? Like I said, around 11 DPO, I went to the bathroom and noticed an odd brownish stuff in underwear and then when I went to the bathroom. It was a fairly light color. I know implantation generally can occur 6-12 DPO so that means I am still in that window. I hope AF is not starting this early though! She is not due until Wednesday!! :( It definitely was an odd color and after wiping multiple times, it was gone. Sorry for the TMI, I guess if it comes back I will know it is likely normal AF spotting.


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## breakingdawn

I have no cramping..


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## BronteForever

Hmmm...not sure. I hope it's not AF though. About a year and a half ago I started spotting before periods. It was so frustrating because I kept thinking it was implantation bleeding. I read a ton about it around that time. I think it's more common before now. However, it is definitely still a possibility. So try not to lose hope yet.


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## breakingdawn

I really hope it is not AF 3 days early because that will totally throw me off cycle and I will need to order some stupid ovulation tests for next round. What a bummer. I may still pick up a cheap test at the store and if it goes away, test Tuesday morning. I just hate wasting a test, even an 88 cent one!


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## breakingdawn

You guys I am freaking out. I know you are not suppose to go back and check a test after 10 minutes but I did, now I see something!????


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## mod19

Ahhh test again! Test again! First thing tomorrow am!


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## breakingdawn

This does have some color to it.
 



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## BronteForever

Definitely test first thing in the morning. I wouldn't trust anything after too long. But it is promising. Good luck!!


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## breakingdawn

For added torture my friend messed with the lighting on my nasty evap photo. Hey, I can pretend worst case! :haha:
 



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## mod19

Have you tested again?


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## breakingdawn

Yeah it was a bfn. I'm pretty sure I'm out.


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## mod19

Sorry. You never know though


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## BronteForever

Sorry Breakingdawn. Hang in there. It often takes one tubers awhile longer to get the BFP so try not to get discouraged at all.


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## breakingdawn

Oh I'm fine! I lucked out with #2! She was conceived the following month after my ectopic and tube removal! My ectopic surgery was 9/3/11 and I got a BFP on 10/30/11!


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## BronteForever

I know that's crazy you had a positive that quickly the last time. She was meant to be!


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## breakingdawn

She really was. That's what my doctor said!


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## mod19

So a little off topic. For the first time ever I tried temping this month...then dd started teething...BAD! Well that completely went out the window. Poor baby doesn't sleep so therefore we don't sleep. She still sleeps between us (no judgement please-it's easier for when she wakes up twice a night...and I get separation anxiety lol) and kicks and moves and cries. My poor little baby :( Dh and I have been completely dead this week, and it's only Tuesday! Oh week please end!


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## breakingdawn

Mod19, that is no fun. :( And there is no judgement here. At least not in my thread. ;) Teething is hard. I did do the temping thing one month when we were TTC #2, hated it. I had zero patience for charting all of that so I stopped. I am going to buy some ovulation strips from amazon though. I used those consistently with #2 and they were very helpful in determining when ovulation was so we weren't just blindly trying and I actually knew for sure what DPO I was. I did not even check this past month so who knows if I even did ovulate! It will be nice to not be in the dark next month. :)


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## mod19

I'm using opks as well. But everyone kept pushing the temping on me. The hell with it. Much easier to pee on a stick than worry about how much sleep you get before you take your temp at the same time every morning. I tried. Didn't really want to but figured I'd give it a go. Oh well.


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## breakingdawn

Honestly I found temping to be more stressful than anything and it seriously took any fun left out of TTC. Lol. I think opks are more than enough and temping just really gets your hopes up. So many factors can affect temps in the morning. It's just not worth it for me. I'd love for you to stick around and keep me updated here! AF is definitely here for me. I am not going to complain because that's a fairly normal cycle for me having just stopped the pill! I know some women can wait a whole month or two before getting their regular periods back after stopping birth control!


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## mod19

Well then I'm glad she's here for you! It's always nice to be able to know where you're at and what to expect. And btw, I've also had evaporation lines on those walmart tests. Definitely need to look at them within the 10 minute window! (Says the lady who stares at them for 2 days before throwing them away lol)

I'm on CD13 and the opks aren't even starting to get darker, there's hardly a test line at all! I mean, there's a slight difference from 7 days ago till today, but not by much. We'll see what happens though. Weather I'll O in the next few days, not o at all, or O late like I normally do only time will tell. If I do O on CD18 or later I'm going to use progesterone cream to lengthen my lp. I've used it before and it actually moved it from a 10 day lp to a 14/15 day lp in 2 cycles.


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## breakingdawn

FX for you!! It is so stressful waiting for O. Then you have the 2ww after that. The joys of TTC huh?! Haha! I never even started using my OPKs until the beginning of O week. I hated wasting them and usually my ovulation day was fairly consistent. I have no idea what it is like now!


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## BronteForever

I tried temping awhile ago too and never had success with it. I'd always forget to do it first thing in the morning and I get up a lot in the middle of the night and that would always mess it up. I stopped pretty quickly. Opks are much easier!! Though once I got used to my cycle I could predict pretty well without them too. 

Mod - hope you get ovulation soon. It definitely is a waiting game for all this. 

Breakingdawn - so sorry you are out this month. 

So I had my first RE appointment and will be starting IVF soon. It's a scary and intimidating process. But very exciting at the same time. I have a few more tests they need to redo and we should be good to go soon.


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## mod19

So glad the appt went well! I'm sure it's all a bit intimidating but I can definitely see how exciting it probably is also! I'm so excited for you! Make sure to keep us posted with everything. I've known a few people who have done Ivf, and most of them have implanted successful embryos.


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## FarfromHome

Found this thread and just wanted to wish everyone baby dust and good luck. I'm pregnant after an ectopic in November 2014 that resulted in the loss of my left tube. Strangely enough, at my first ultrasound we found out I had ovulated on my left side and my right tube hopped over to catch the egg <3


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## mod19

Far that's awesome! Definitely gives some of us hope...and proof that it does happen like that (ovulating from the opposite side). A big congratulations!


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## breakingdawn

I think it is so freaky the other tube can go get the egg. :haha: No idea why! I just get a weird visual every time! But it is definitely reassuring to know! I am having a full normal AF this month so I am hoping I get a nice normal O in April! :O


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## BronteForever

I think it's freaky that the tube can get an egg from the other side too. Our bodies are fascinating. Congrats Farfromhome. Best wishes on a happy and healthy pregnancy.


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## breakingdawn

And yes, much congrats to you! :) Looks like I need some April buddies.


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## mod19

How is everyone doing?

Cd 16 for me. Still a negative opk this morning, but TONS of pinkish ewcm today, so that's a good start! Not worried about the pinkish tint as I had a really short period and probably just some leftover blood...but yay! I used to be so dry, but since I started taking probiotics I'm definitely more wet down there.


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## breakingdawn

Waiting for dumb AF to leave! :( Hopefully she will be gone by this weekend some time.


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## BronteForever

I'm just hanging out. I need to work on losing some weight before doing IVF and have a few more tests. So I'll probably just be in limbo for awhile (one of my least favorite places to be). 

Good luck as you are about to enter the TWW, Mod. Fx for you!


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## breakingdawn

Being in limbo stinks. :/ Hopefully it won't be too long of a limbo for you though.


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## mod19

Being in limbo does suck. Do you have ant sort of time frame at all?

I've had 2 days of positive opks. (3 total test, will do another tonight and again tomorrow). You O 12-24 hours after the first positive right? I thought I read somewhere before that it's normal to have a couple days of positives. I hope so lol. We've bd the last 3 nights, but went to the zoo today and are wore out! So not really sure if it'll happen tonight. Yesterday morning was my first positive and we used preseed and softcups last night, so hoping for the best. I had a few cramps yesterday and pain on my left side, so hoping that means I o'd from the left where I still have a tube left!

Also, out of curiosity I did a due date calculator to see if it would be a 2016 or 2017 baby, and it would be a Christmas baby. Like, due date would be Christmas Day. That would be the best Christmas present ever! But I'm getting a bit ahead of myself.


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## BronteForever

Ooh good luck Mod. I've read differing opinions regarding when you ovulate after your first positive on a opk. I'm sure it varies greatly by individual too. But generally anywhere from 12-60 hours. I think you are right on schedule and might want to fit in another time just in case. It definitely couldn't hurt your chances. Good luck. It's always refreshing when you feel O pain on your "good side." I like that feeling as well. Fingers crossed for you!!

I have an ultrasound this week and blood tests, since one of my last prolactin level was high. They are hoping its within normal range on a fasting test. If not I have to have more tests. The ultrasound is just to double check I don't have fluid in my remaining tube. Then we should be all set. I need to lose about 10 lbs to qualify for the shared risk programs, which we will likely do. But losing less will help regardless so I might wait a few months just to be safe. We are probably looking at starting in late June, July or August.


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## mod19

Bronte how have all the tests gone so far this week?

I'm just hanging out until test time. Sunday will be 8dpo, so knowing me ill probably start testing Saturday lol.


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## BronteForever

Ha, Mod it's hard to resist not testing early. Good luck!!

I had an ultrasound this morning that went well. No fluid in my tubes and my lining looks good. She checked a bunch of stuff and said everything looked great. So all good news that we should be moving forward. I also had a blood test for my prolactin levels and should know the results by the end of the day. The nurse seemed to say that's fairly easy to treat though if it's high again. We'll see.


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## breakingdawn

Hi ladies :) It is O week for me, not much going on. Will try some OPKs on Monday and see what is going on. Very relaxed approach this month though. I hope everyone is doing well!


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## BronteForever

Good luck, Breakingdawn.


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## mod19

Good luck breaking! Are you doing the every other day thing or getting on it all days when you see that positive?

So far I've tested 3 days (6dpo, 7dpo, 8dpo) and have gotten 3 evap lines! Ugh why?!?! I've used two different brands of tests and it's killing me now! Lol. I just want am answer.

Today's evap line showed up in 3 hours, yesterday's was after 10 hours, and who knows on Friday since I was at work. I hate evap lines!


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## breakingdawn

The evap line killed me last month. :( I ordered my IC OPKs and HPTs. I used them with my last pregnancy and they worked awesome. I got my BFP at 9 DPO on those tests with #2! We are doing every other day. Both times I got pregnant we did every other day just 3 times during O week and that worked. I feel like every other day is best because it does build up the swimmer count by double! So we did Saturday night, depending on how my OPK goes tomorrow, we should BD Monday and Wednesday and that will probably be it unless I show a late ovulation in which cause we would do Friday for good measure! If this isn't enough we may try to squeeze in a little more BD time next month. It is so hard to time is just right and know when to do it, especially when you are doing every other day. Ugh!


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## breakingdawn

Well, I've been cramping and O is due tomorrow! Here we go....
 



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## mod19

Hope it's positive later tonight or tomorrow! Get busy to catch that eggy!


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## breakingdawn

I am expecting it to be pretty dark by tomorrow night. Normally mine progress pretty blazing dark!!


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## mod19

That's good. At least there's no question if it's positive or not then.


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## breakingdawn

Here's to hoping! I will check again tomorrow afternoon around the same time.


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## breakingdawn

Ok, advice! We did the BD last night... my OPK does seem to be getting darker. I should O late tonight or possibly tomorrow. DD is so worn out from work and school we can probably only do tonight or tomorrow night. Which should we do!? :happydance:
 



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## mod19

I say if it gets positive by tonight then get busy today, but if it's not positive till tomorrow then wait. Maybe? I dunno


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## breakingdawn

I think we are going to try tomorrow. He's just tired tonight! :( I don't want to push him either. I want it to be fun and enjoyable for both of us!


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## BronteForever

Sometimes having it be fun and enjoyable does trump everything else. You don't want to hate the process. Good luck!


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## breakingdawn

Frustrating. Either I missed my surge or I'm not ovulating at all this month. Definitely should have by now! I'm just going to go ahead and count myself out this month dang. :p I don't get it though. I've been cramping, sore bbs, all the usual O signs. :cry:
 



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## mod19

Noooo! Don't count yourself out! You totally could have missed the surge during the night!


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## breakingdawn

I don't get how it looked so dark yesterday then light today. I've done these many times in the past and never had an issue getting a super dark positive! :(


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## mod19

Maybe you had a short surge during the night? 

What you could do if you wanted to be schiesty is go into your doc and say you've been trying for a year with nothing and get on clomid :)


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## breakingdawn

It is only our second month so I am not going to panic yet. Just a wee bit disappointed and confused. I am crampy for sure this morning. I was certain it would be blazing positive.


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## BronteForever

You definitely aren't out at all, especially if you got a few BDs in during the fertile window. You might have just missed it during the night.


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## breakingdawn

I guess so.. I will try and remain positive and still hopefully get another try in tonight for good measure.


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## mod19

Definitely get another in tonight!


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## breakingdawn

Ladies I'm 99% sure I hit my surge yesterday. The top two tests are yesterday and the bottom two are today. Due to my cramping on one side I'm almost certain an egg was released today.
 



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## mod19

Then definitely get busy tonight!


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## breakingdawn

Yes!


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## mod19

Well guys I think af is on her way. I'm super irritated with dh about, we'll everything, and I've only been home for 10 minutes. In my defense though, he is super lazy and has 4 dirty clothes piles.


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## breakingdawn

Don't count yourself out yet. I am feeling super negative tonight too. I keep wondering if I really even ovulated. But if my tests did get darker at some point maybe that means there is a small chance I had a surge overnight. Frustrating. :/


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## mod19

I'm sure it is frustrating. I know I'd think the same thing, so easier said than done on not counting yourself out.

I'm having mild on and off cramps (currently off), so I really do think I'm out. Sometimes I get cramps 3 days before, sometimes it's only hours before, so hard to tell when she will show. Also weird, is the last few cycles it's started in the middle of the night.


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## BronteForever

Mod - hopefully AF stays away. This whole process is frustrating. It's hard not to get irritated at times. 

At least you'll know soon. The waiting is the worst for me. I'd rather know so I can get ready for the next month.


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## breakingdawn

Can I just throw in the towel now? :cry: One minute my OPKs are super light, the next minute darker. I never O late, ever... so it is highly unlikely that is the case now. I am just counting myself out this month. I hate to be a negative Nancy but I have never had an issue with OPKs until now!!! :growlmad:
 



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## BronteForever

So sorry, Breakingdawn. That is frustrating.


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## mod19

I know that multiple surges and multiple days in a row are common. Maybe your body geared up to O and didnt, and is getting ready to now? It's possible that stressing out about it threw your body off a day or so.


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## breakingdawn

At least I won't be worrying about a BFP this 2ww. :(


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## mod19

And yes, not knowing is the bad part. I won't be devastated if I'm not this cycle, although I was really hoping for a Christmas baby, but I'd really like confirmation either way.


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## breakingdawn

Ladies, are sore bbs at all a sign of ovulation? I took off my bra tonight and noticed they were quite sore! :blush: If I did ovulate it was either yesterday or the day before... confused! I feel like it is too early for AF symptoms for sure. :shrug:


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## mod19

I actually think sore boobs are caused by a rise in progesterone, which would mean you ovulated!


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## breakingdawn

Not only that but I noticed in the mirror my face broke out in two small spots. I'm confused! Nornally these are AF signs but that's a good 12-13 days away!


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## mod19

Just looked at my app and I broke out right before ovulation, so I'm sure the hormones do it...on that matter, I'm breaking out bad right now...God I wish af would come so I wouldn't have to deal with this anymore! That or a positive test, but that's not happening either.


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## breakingdawn

Maybe that means I O'd after all. That would be nice!


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## mod19

I bet you did.


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## breakingdawn

Just a small update.. OPK was very very light today. Almost certain if ovulation happened, it was 1-2 days ago. Which would officially put me in the 2ww. I have had some cramping so hopefully that is a good sign an egg was dropped. I cannot say my hopes are too high but I am sure I will test around 10 or 11 DPO for fun because I am a POAS addict. :haha: Just not expecting much.


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## BronteForever

Good luck to both of you. My boobs always hurt after ovulation as well.


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## mod19

Good luck breaking.

I'm 13dpo (maybe 12) and still bfn. Been getting slight cramps for the last 3 days and back and body aches...just what I need, to be sick when af comes. I have so much to do this week before dd birthday I really can't afford to get sick.


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## breakingdawn

Sorry mod! I hate being sick. :(


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## BronteForever

Mod - hope the sickness stays away. You should have an answer either way. Fx for you!


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## mod19

Yeah af isn't technically late till Monday, which is good, cuz that means I'll have a normal 14-15 day lp.


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## mod19

Well guys I just got the faintest of faint second line...but I think the test was faulty. I mean, it took FOREVER for they dye to spread across the test...like 30 seconds for it to even start! Grrr I'm having such bad luck with tests this go round. 3 evaps on 3 different brands and a reject test. Ugh!


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## mod19

Nvm false alarm...af came. Let's start a new cycle!


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## breakingdawn

Ugh. I hate stupid evaps. They are the worst.


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## mod19

It wasn't even an evap! It showed up within the 5 mins, but there was definitely something wrong with it. Oh well.


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## breakingdawn

That is a bummer... :(


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## mod19

It's ok. I pretty much knew af was on her way...but I couldn't resist taking a test lol. I looked at dd the other night while she was asleep between us and told dh I would be fine if we weren't able to have anymore children. Of course we will continue to try, but I really don't think I will be devastated if we don't get #2. Dd took so long and I went through so much to get her, I'm perfectly happy with just her.


Wow got all gushy on you guys...damn af!


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## BronteForever

So sorry Mod. That's so frustrating to have to deal with faulty tests. Glad you are content with your daughter so any additional children will just be a bonus. Good luck.


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## breakingdawn

Big hugs mod!!!! I'm thinking of you and you will likely get your miracle when you least expect it. I'm feeling super Debbie downer today. I definitely feel like AF will be coming on time. Even though it's still a ways out I'm pretty in tune with my body and I knew both times I was pregnant before. Thus far I've only had pre AF signs. :( I'm just scared next month I won't get a positive opk either and something is wrong.


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## mod19

Oh no please don't think something is wrong! Us one tubers just have a few things against us is all. Just because af is on her way doesn't necessarily mean there is so.etching wrong. Heck, a few cycles ago I was 2 weeks late and was not prego, just had delayed O possibly? Who knows we weren't trying and I wasn't concerned in the least. We all have off cycles here and there.


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## Dtrisha

Hey girls. Do you mind if I can join? Seems like a pretty active thread. I just need some girls to talk to. I had a ectopic last September. I was lucky enough just to have methotrexate. But ever since then I feel like maybe I'm broke. It's all in my head but I'm scared that I'm not ovulating. I don't temp because it's to stressful and I never sleep through the night and always up at different times. I'm currently in my TWW at 9dpo. Thinking I'm out but who knows. One second I'm confident and then one second I'm not. I hate knowing when I O but at the same time I like it to know when to BD of course.


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## breakingdawn

Of course you can join. Welcome! :) Me and you are on the same train right now! One minute I'm positive and the next minute I'm a Debbie downer. I tried using opks this month and never really saw a true positive. I keep trying to hope I missed my surge at night or the following morning since they did get fairly dark then light the next day. But I'm generally feeling out this month. We are somewhat close in cycles! I have a strict 28 day cycle. AF is due Wednesday of next week. I'll probably do a test on Saturday just to know for sure I need to prepare for spotting and AF next week. :( have you tried using opks? I did temping with #2 but hated it. Way too stressful. So for now I am just doing opks although that was pretty stressful this month too.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking- yeah I used them this cycle. Temping is way to stressful and I wouldn't be able to take it the same time every day so that doesn't work. I hate the 2ww because you stress and stress and half the time it's bfn and you stressed for nothing. Part of me doesn't want to take OPK again just because of the stress favor. But I want to BD accordingly. Ugh decisions lol.


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## mod19

Hey dtrisha, welcome! How long have you been ttc? Even with my ectopic my Dr was more than willing to offer me clomid, which is how we got dd.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah not sure if I am ovulating or not. I mean I think I am but I don't know for sure because I don't temp. I think I'm gonna talk to my doctor in June if I'm not pregnant by then. Can't hurt I suppose. I have been TTC since last July. Got pregnant in August then had the ectopic. Couldn't try till January so we just NTNP till April then I started up with OPK again.


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## breakingdawn

I have a love hate relationship with OPKs. I wish I could just not worry with them but like you said, it is really essential to know when the good times are to BD. My husband goes to school and works full time, so sex all month long is not an option. :haha: I have to choose wisely and even then, getting 3 tries during fertile week is the max.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah sounds like a full plate for sure. Ugh it's so stressful. 

Do you have to do tests before being put on clomid to see if you're ovulating or not ?


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## BronteForever

Welcome Dtrisha - hope you have success soon! So sorry to hear about your ectopic. It's never an easy experience to have to go through. Hope you are doing alright.

Mod can answer your question better, I'm sure. However, you have to be ovulating at least somewhat since you got pregnant relatively easily. So that's probably not a big issue for you personally (though it's always possible). I know it's super hard not to worry about everything though. I just went through all my tests and several easy Cycle Day 3 blood tests can tell you a lot about ovulation or a Day 21 blood test (if needed). If you are worried you could always ask your doctor. I think they are more likely to prescribe Clomid if you have one tube, because it can force you to ovulate from both sides, making it more likely you'll ovulate from your good side.

If you still have two tubes (though it's always possible there is blockage in them somehow that led to the ectopic), they might want to do a few tests before prescribing. Every doctor is different.

Don't be afraid to ask anything. That's one thing I learned after my ectopic. Ask. Ask. Ask. Get a second opinion if needed. And then repeat.


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## Dtrisha

Thank you so much for all the info Bronte! Yeah we got lucky on our second cycle so that's why I don't think it's a problem. Just makes you think ya know ? I think I'll go to my doctor in June if not pregnant and see what she has to say. Can't hurt to do a check up


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## breakingdawn

I personally have no experience with clomid. :( Wish I could be of more help.


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## mod19

I was sent for an hsg, which ultimately opened up my blocked tube (scars from a previous ectopic) enough that i had another ectopic. During that process I accidently stumbled upon my current dr who actually did my surgery. She had me track my cycles with opks for 2 cycles before I got my prescription. I was also brought in for an ultrasound to see how many follicles there were. They want to reduce the chance of multiples as much as possible, so if you have 10 ready to go, they're going to advise against trying that cycle. They didn't see anything, but I really think I ovulated the morning of the ultrasound since I still got pregnant. 

I'm due back in June as well. If nothing happens by thenow I'm going to go on armed with my tracking (they want it on paper so it can be in your file) and ask for it again.

Bronte is right. They are more than willing to give it to one tubers because it has an excellent chance of making you ovulate from your good side.


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## breakingdawn

Well I am having awful back pain right now. I had this with #2 all the way until my BFP and beyond... but I can also have this with PMS too so I am 100% not reading into anything. Also having some annoying issues with CM which I won't bore you with the details... but it is super annoying!!!! Being a woman. Yay!


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## Dtrisha

Mod thank you!! Yeah I'm going to just take it till June and go from there. 

Breaking dawn - I hope it's a good sign !!! Good luck. :)


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## breakingdawn

I woke up this morning feeling exactly like the mornings when AF starts. LOTS of back pain and cramps, mild headache, gassy. Problem is, AF is still 8 days away. Um, what now? Please don't let this be a random early AF. My cycles are normally 28 days spot on but being I am 35 now, I am always paranoid about early menopause. Hypochondriac much? :haha:


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## mod19

Lol I'll allow it.

Maybe it's an early sign? 

Or maybe you ate something that's causing the gas hehe.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking dawn - it could be a sign of it stays for a few days? I hate waiting. I'm 10dpo took a few test and nothing. Feeling like I'm out ugh.


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## mod19

Sorry trisha, it sucks when you keep seeing nothing! 

Does anyone else get so much more relaxed before af compared to the ttw? During the ttw you just don't know, but waiting to O you know you're not prego, so I dunno, I can not obsess.


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## breakingdawn

I am SUPER moody which is my number one AF sign and it does come a week early. I was never moody like usual when I conceived last time so I am 99% sure I am out now. Not kidding, lol. I know my body pretty well! It is kinda scary. This early back pain and cramps sucks though. :(


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## mod19

I'm sorry breaking, that sucks. I hate it when I get moody, especially at dh. He deserves it sometimes, but a day or so before she arrives I can get like the devil.


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## breakingdawn

I hate being moody like this. :/


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## Dtrisha

Moodiness is the worst. I just want to be left alone a lot of the time.


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## breakingdawn

Guess I'll drop an update here. Around 7DPO (if I did ovulate that day).. the extreme back pain continues. This was my #1 symptom with my second daughter. I hate that my body is playing tricks on me. One minute the back pain will go away, then it comes back in full force followed by cramping shortly after. It is maddening. AF is due a week from today. If it is coming, I should have spotting around Monday-Tuesday. That is what happened last cycle anyway. I still plan on testing Saturday morning I guess. I would rather be prepared for AF than caught by surprise. This back pain is getting OLLLLLD though. I want to take Advil but trying not to since i have no idea if there is a SLIM chance of implantation or not so I would rather not take any medicine. Fun times!


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## mod19

Well they say to live as if you weren't pregnant until proven wrong, so if the back pain is that bad, I'd suggest popping some Tylenol for some relief. Oh the joys of ttc.


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## Dtrisha

Breakingdawn- good luck :) ! I hope this is it. 

For me it's CD1 :(


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## breakingdawn

This morning things have died down a little. Mild back pain, very random mild cramps, and a little gassy. Otherwise, things mostly feel normal. I had a tough time sleeping last night though. I was so proud of myself because I actually went to bed early but then woke up about every hour. I can't win. Lol!


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## Dtrisha

That's how I was 2 night before. Ugh I hate not getting sleep because then I'm crabby. I'm debating if I want to use OPK this cycle again. I probably will but part of me doesn't want to. I think my periods are starting to get back to normal because today is day 28 and I started my period. This is how my periods used to be. So I'm hoping they'll stay at 28 and they'll go by faster. The 32-34 day cycles were killing me. I've also been eating healthier and drinking a ton of water so that probably helps :).


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## mod19

Breaking I'm glad things have settled down for you a bit, but not sleeping is the worst. I hate feeling dead all day.

Dtrisha sorry af got you. Nothing wrong with taking the stress out and not using opks. I'm debating nor using them this cycle too. Cd7 and I still haven't decided, but I don't own until around cd17, so I have some time to decide. 

Last month my period was super short at 2 days, and it's always been 5-6 days of full on bleeding, and now this cycle I've been spotting for 3 days. Must be making up for last month. And my nines are sore, isn't that supposed to happen before af? I'm all kinds of messed up I guess lol


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## Dtrisha

Yeah I'm not that upset. Just glad that they seem to be getting shorter and regulating hopefully. Yeah the only reason I like OPK is to know to BD more because we usually just so every 2-3 days.


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## mod19

I think every 2-3 days covers your bases.

Ps sorry for all the typos in my last post. I got a new phone and hate the auto correct on it.


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## Dtrisha

Mod- totally fine. I just like to BD like two days in a row when I know it's my fertile time.


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## mod19

Oh I totally get it...we usually do 3-4 days in a row during that time.


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## Dtrisha

I wish I would know before I ovulate so I could get more BDing in before


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## breakingdawn

If it makes you feel better I conceived #2 with literally only two tries. That was it. And that was one month after losing my right tube from an ectopic.


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## Dtrisha

Oh wow really? That's awesome. I wish I could be so lucky !


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## breakingdawn

I think my luck ran out though. :( I know it is early but.. I did a test today. Stark white :bfn: :(


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## breakingdawn

Not even a fun evap to guess over. These tests are good. Lol sigh
 



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## Dtrisha

Wondfo? Yeah I have some of those. Good luck I hope it's your month ! We all deserve it. I don't even know what it's like to feel pregnant over 5 weeks


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## breakingdawn

Yeah, I have always had great luck with Wondfo in the past. I don't think this is my month though. :(


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## Dtrisha

What DPO are you?


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## breakingdawn

Honestly I am not sure. The main reason I feel I am out is because I never saw a pos. / dark OPK this month. I have never had an issue with ovulation in the past so it is possible I missed my surge but I don't know. My best guess, when I usually ovulate, would be 8/9 DPO. My last pregnancy I got a BFP at 8/9 DPO with a wondfo.


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## Dtrisha

Ok well I think you still have plenty of time. We will all get one when we least expect it I bet.


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## breakingdawn

Yeah. I was originally going to test tomorrow morning but I forgot my oldest has a soccer game in the morning so it's going to be hectic and I don't want another :bfn: to get me down. So, if anything I'll test Sunday morning. If it's still negative that will be be definitive answer as I should have spotting for AF the next day.


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## Dtrisha

Baby dust to you! My fingers are crossed.


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## mod19

Sorry breaking. I got all my bfps around 12dpo if it makes you feel any better. All depends on how long it takes to implant.


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## breakingdawn

I laid down a little bit ago for a brief nap, which is a little odd, and I noticed my stomach muscles felt a little tight? Almost like I had been doing sit ups only I haven't. Was a little odd, not reading into it though.


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## Dtrisha

You just never know. With my ectopic I didn't get a actual line till 12dpo I think.


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## breakingdawn

My ectopic I didn't get a positive until the day after I missed my period but I don't want to think about ectopics! Terrified of another one.


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## breakingdawn

TMI TIME! Lol! So, a minute ago I felt like my period literally just stated. I felt stuff in my underwear and everything. I went to the bathroom and it was just a ton of clear stuff. This does happen sometimes before AF so it could go either way I'm sure.


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## Dtrisha

The stomach muscle is a weird thing o e never heard of that. And yeah I don't like hearing about ectopics either unless its success stories after them. Oh wow that's odd. Is it maybe a mucous plug ?


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## breakingdawn

Nah it was just clear watery stuff. EW. I do get it sometimes before AF though, just not quite so early.


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## mod19

Trish dd is a post ectopic rainbow. 2 months after actually. I've been trying to get the house ready for her birthday party, you know, cleaning, food, etc. Gave her pizza and she's as happy as can be now. 3 days and all I had to do was giver the girl pizza. Smh


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## breakingdawn

Discovered something interesting tonight. I went back through my pink pad app and when I got that very faint BFP with #2 it was Sunday and AF was due Wednesday. Apparently I didn't test as early as I thought. This weekend would be the same thing, test Sunday and AF due Wednesday.


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## mod19

See, there ya go :)


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## Dtrisha

Mod - that's awesome. Yeah I think we're just going to BD every 2-3 days this month and relax. No OPK or anything. I think it's to much stress on me. On cd3 today and cramping so I don't feel to well but thankfully it's the weekend and I can relax


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## BronteForever

Good luck Breakingdawn. It could be a positive sign. It's so hard to tell. 

Dtrisha - cramping stinks. Hope it goes away soon. My husband and I went through times when we didn't plan as much either. It was nice to take a somewhat break while still TTC. BD every 2-3 days is surely enough. 

Mod - hope the birthday party goes well. Should be an exciting time. Though I know they can get stressful.


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## breakingdawn

Ladies... :( I caved today because I remembered AF now usually comes a day early on Tuesday... :bfn: I was building myself up for this for days, I have no idea why I'm so upset but I literally cried. I know everyone says you aren't out until she shows but unless it's another ectopic, it's on to May.


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## BronteForever

I'm sorry Breakingdawn - this is such a rollercoaster of emotions each month. Hugs!


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## Dtrisha

Breaking in so sorry :(


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## breakingdawn

Cd1 :(


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## Dtrisha

Ugh that is unfortunate :( I really hate AF. I don't think it helped us the last few months because of worrying about OPK and when they got positive and such. I'm hoping the more relaxed approach will help us out this month. Are you tracking O as well breaking ?


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## breakingdawn

Yes, I have to. My husband is in school full time and works full time so he won't just BD every other day all month. He gets really really tired easily. So the 3-4 times we try, all need to be around O. And I cannot just guess. :(


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## Dtrisha

Awh. Well that stinks :( just be hopeful for next cycle !


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## breakingdawn

I am feeling really discouraged right now. I have been having a lot of pain on my lower left side (feels like it is right on/near my ovary). I read this means that is probably the side I ovulated from this past month. That was my good side. :( That means in May there is a good chance I will ovulate from my right side... well guess what? There is no tube there. I can't win.


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## BronteForever

I'm so sorry breakingdawn. It does suck. I wish it didn't. I get pains on my bad side all the time now. Sometimes excruciatingly and I've missed work several times for it. I'm assuming it's related to the scar tissue and ovulation, since that's when it happens. Though, there has been some question as to which side is actually my tube that was removed, because my doctor's reports are contradictory. I'm not sure if I can go back to the doctor that did the ectopic surgery and get a report now or not. That would help answer some questions.

Anyway, you don't switch back and forth each month, which can make it even more frustrating when planning. I think it's technically which side matures first. And it can be the left side two months, then the right once, etc. It's just anyone's guess and it sucks because you can't help in timing anything. It's good to hear that people had success with the other tube "picking up" the egg though. So that's a plus.

Get out your frustrations though. We are here and have to go through the same stuff.

I get so mad some months. Now I'm just happy to be moving onto IVF so I can by-pass the tubes all together, since they seem to be really non-functioning now in my case.


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## breakingdawn

Thanks :( Your reply made me cry. So many people to tell me to suck it up, and to stop being so negative. But none of these people know what it's like TTC with one tube. I can't keep suppressing my feelings. Every now and then I need to just get them out, however irrational or negative they may be. So thanks for saying that. Thanks for being someone who finally says it's okay for me to get angry and disappointed and sad. I needed that.


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## hate the wait

hello everybody, 
it is my first time here and would like to share my story.
in march i had my period and after a week i had spotting for 2 days so i went to the doctor's clinic and they did a blood test and turned out i am pregnant even though i have had my period 1 week before that. the doctor said it was not a period and i cant be convinced that it was implantation spotting since it was just like my period flow would be but without the pain that usually comes with it. after 2 weeks i had severe right pain and was rushed to the hospital for a surgery that removed the pregnancy and left my tubes intact according to the dr.
the surgery was on 30th of march, so now on 22 of april i had a 2 days period just like the last time no pain no nothing just the flow and now i am spotting again!!
i am terrified and confused i dont want to be having another ectopic 
i just need to know when should you get your period after the surgery? isnt it too early after only 3 weeks? and wasnt it supposed to be extremely painful?


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## Dtrisha

Breaking- big hugs to you! I'm sorry you're going through all this. I couldn't imagine having just one tube. 

Hatethewait- I'm not sure how soon after the surgery you should be having a period as I had MTX for my ectopic. But if I had to guess 3 weeks if pretty early maybe ? And weird stuff happens after your EP is what I have been learning. After MTX for me I had longer periods and heavier and now they're finally going back to normal.


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## breakingdawn

I had surgery for an ectopic on September 3, 2011. My right tube was lost. I got pregnant again in October and received a BFP on October 30, 2011. It is HIGHLY possible to get pregnant soon after an ectopic and tube loss. My 3 year old is living proof. If you have any concerns I would order some cheap pregnancy tests from amazon and just keep a watch on it to make sure your body is not producing any hcg.


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## BronteForever

Breakingdawn - absolutely! That's what we are here for, and it's perfectly natural to get angry. I joined roller derby awhile ago and I think one of the main reasons was to help get anger out in a more positive manner. It's not good to bottle it up at all. I did that for too long and learned my lesson.

Hate the wait - so sorry for your loss and that you had to suffer through an ectopic. Sending ... :hugs: Mine has been 7 years ago now, so granted my memory is sketchy of that time. But I believe I had a fairly normal period the month following. If anything my period was probably lighter, though I was anemic and on prescription-strength iron supplements at the time from my tube rupturing. Since that time, my periods have stayed fairly normal, however, I spot every month now before my period and I do get ovulation pains. You will definitely notice some changes from having been pregnant (especially if it was your first), having an ectopic, and having surgery. But everyone is different. I also did not have any MTX shots, which maybe what cause longer and heavier periods for Dtrisha and others.

Just keep an eye on it and if the pain gets worse, definitely have it checked out. I did not feel comfortable with my doctor that performed my surgery and went to another hospital a week later to have it looked at because I was scared of some more issues: such as pain in the arms again from blood loss. They checked me out and said it was just the body evening out and blood being reabsorbed. Sounds like your tube didn't rupture, which is great. However, getting rechecked out if you are worried is not a bad idea. It will give you some peace of mind. I needed that alot after my surgery.


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## breakingdawn

I'm feeling a lot better now. :) I should ovulate a few days after Mother's Day in May so maybe it will be a good luck charm!


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## BronteForever

Yay for feeling better. Hopefully May is your month!


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## Dtrisha

Breaking in glad you're feeling better :) and I will pray it is your month !! Not sure when I will ovulate because my cycles are getting back to normal and last cycle it was cd18 but I'm sure it'll be sooner since my cycle was only 28 days last month. So hoping I O on atleast cd16 so I have a good LP. I think it's good we didn't have a baby in December because it's a crazy month as it is I would feel bad to put a baby in that mix. So onward for a new year baby :). How's everyone doing ?


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## breakingdawn

Thanks ladies. :) CD2 here and AF is kicking my booty! I think this is my first REAL AF, having been off the pill for 3 months now. It feels like a good *normal* flow. I feel like everything is getting cleansed and hopefully leading to a positive OPK for May!


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## BronteForever

Breaking - yay for normal AF; if that's something to cheer about. I'm feeling cleansed myself this month. I was expecting a bad one last month following my HSG test, but it wasn't too heavy and not that many clots. I've heard those tests clean you out, so I was expecting that. This one still isn't too many clots, but it's definitely heavier than I have had in awhile. I switched to a menstrual cup awhile ago, so it's pretty easy to figure out the exact amount of the "flow" which is strangely helpful in understanding your body. Hopefully having good, solid AFs is a good thing and it helps both of us for the next few months. 

dtrisha - hoping for a good LP for you as well and the timing works out perfectly. Good luck this month!


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## breakingdawn

I have heard a good AF will definitely clean out your system so that is what I am hoping! I have not had a GOOD one in years. Every time I came off the pill I conceived fairly quick so my body never had a chance to have a full normal period. Usually they are short and light. I definitely see this as a good thing! It is not abnormally heavy or painful but definitely regular/normal I would say!


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## mod19

Sorry I've been mia guys. My parents drove down for dd birthday. Between them being here and getting everything ready for her party I've been exhausted. Now that everything is back to normal I've had time to catch up.

I'm going to post in a couple different posts because I was almost done, and I hit something and erased it all...I'm sure you guys know how that goes.

Bronte anything new news yet? Besides a normal af?

Breaking I'm so glad you are feeling better! I felt so bad for you that you were so down. January babies are good too :) like Trish said, throwing a baby into Christmas time would be really hectic. 

Trish I really hope your lp lengthens out. I know all too well about it. I'm not going to bust out the progesterone cream yet in hopes that my Dr will prescribe me clomid again in June, but it definitely worked for me before.


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## mod19

Hate I'm so sorry for what you're going through. This is going to sound bad, but it sucks they left your tube in. When my tube ruptured back in 07 they repaired it, and it ultimately lead to my second ectopic. I'm not trying to scare you, just knowing what I went through, I don't wish it on anybody. I've been pregnant 4 times and have had 5 surgeries because of them, and only 1 baby (ectopic 1 - laprascopic x2, ectopic 2 - laprascopic, dd - emergency c section, blightened ovum - laprascopic & d&c to remove grapefruit sized cyst and pregnancy). I don't really remember when my my periods returned after my surgeries, but they definitely were not painful. And, my ectopics were completely different. Neither one hurt me in the slightest, even after my tube ruptured, but my first one I blead from when my period was due and never stopped until after my surgery, which was done about 3 weeks after af was due. My second I started brown spotting for 2 days before turning to bright red. Dr's actually did scans and thought it was just a normal miscarriage, but it was too early to tell if it was ectopic. Went in 2 weeks later for more bloods and had to come back the next day to remove the ectopic that was visible by then. They're not sure if I miscarried twins 2 different ways, or if it was just different from my first. But I do have dd now and she is absolutely amazing in every way and totally worth the wait. If you're not confident that it's not a second ectopic, take a test. If it's positive get in asap to get checked out.


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## mod19

Afm-I'm sick :( and have a yeast infection :( :(. Dd was sick on her birthday (poor baby) and I think I got what she had. And im on cd 13, so starting to enter my fertile period. Why? Lol. Oh well, it is what it is. Opk should still be negative for a few more days, so hopefully I'll feel better in the next day or two and get in some quality bding.


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## breakingdawn

Bummer on the yeast infection! I use to get those often but not so much anymore, thankfully! *knock on wood* Lol! I agree... December baby would not be the #1 month I would pick. Also, I am totally okay with not being SUPER pregnant in the HOT hot summer either! So, I think it will all work out. As long as I don't end up with another ectopic I will have no complaints. I am going to try and stay more positive going forward. I am a little nervous about not seeing another positive OPK but I am trying not to let my head go there yet. I still have some time until the fertile window and worrying about all that!


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## BronteForever

Mod - glad to hear the party and festivities went well. Bummer about everyone being sick though. Hope stuff clears up before you O. 

AFM - I'm still in limbo, hanging out. Though we got our IVF contract to look over and should be all set for July. I have another test next Tuesday and I need to ask a few more questions to narrow down a more specific start time estimate.


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## hate the wait

Mod19 i am sorry for your loss and all what you have been through.
thank you for sharing your story, another ectopic is actually what is scaring me the most right now but i guess i should wait a couple of days and get an hpt before visiting my doctor.


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## Dtrisha

Bronte- thanks, I sure hope it's atleast 12 days this time. But I won't even know because I'm not tracking. So will see. Thanks for the kind words. 

Mod- yeah me too thanks. I don't think anything is wrong I just think my body is just getting back to normal. (Hopefully) everything was so normal before I just want to get back to that. 

Good luck to everyone this month !!


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## breakingdawn

AF is being so weird on me now. CD1 & 2 were pretty heavy, good flow. Now nothing is barely there. :shrug: It would worry me a little if AF was so short. Normally it lasts 4-5 days but is pretty light (this was when I was on the pill though).


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## breakingdawn

Hi ladies - hope you are all doing good! AF has packed her bags and I will begin testing for O toward the end of next week/weekend. FX for me!


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## Dtrisha

Breaking- hey everything's going well over here :). Trying to BD every other day. Not testing for O which kind of stinks cause I wish I knew but at the same time I feel less stressed about it. Good luck this cycle ! FX'd for you :)


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## breakingdawn

FX for you as well! I'll be honest, with #1 I was clueless on everything and did not test at all! It only took a few months there. Of course that was before the tube loss issue. But you should be fine! A part of me really does not want to test but the other part really would like to know if I am ovulating again!


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## Dtrisha

Yeah that's how I'm feeling. But I'm just trying to relax and let things happen. I just get so worried though if something is wrong and I don't know it and keep trying and nothing happens. Are you in US or UK? Or somewhere else. I know lots of people are from UK here


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## breakingdawn

I am in the US -- in Georgia :)


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## Dtrisha

Oh ok awesome. I'm trying to decide if I should go to my OB soon to see if she can run any test? Maybe just routine bloods to check everything and maybe a HSG? I don't want to rush it but at the same time if something is not working right I want it to be fixed. She told me if I wasn't pregnant in 6 months which is next month to come and see her. But I'm not sure what they can do at that point


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## breakingdawn

How long have you been TTC again?


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## Dtrisha

After EP since January. But we didn't really try in January or February. We just didn't prevent it. March was actively trying by just BDing more. So not sure how long you can actually say we have ya know ?


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## breakingdawn

I would not worry about seeing a doctor until you have been REALLY trying a full 6 months. Most doctors will even say a year. But 6-9 months is what I would say... before really getting tested and going through all that.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah cause I know that will be more stress. I'll give it a few months but if my yearly comes around I might as well as when I'm there. But I think it's around August


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## mod19

Trish your dr may want to ensure your tube(s) is clear. Or suggest something along the lines of clomid. Neither was stressful for me, it was actually more of a relief that I could finally move forward instead of being dead in the water.

How has everyone else been?

Afm-I'm definitely feeling a lot better and so is dd (poor baby had a double ear infection), and the yeast infection is gone...so yay! I usually use opks from the last day of my period, but I skipped about 4 days while my parents were in town, and picked up again around cd13 or . Well there's no sign of o in sight. None. Unless I o'd early and missed it, but picked up on cd 13 and and the lines have been super light. On cd 19 now I believe. So maybe I really did miss it, or maybe with the stress and sickness I just skipped it or delayed it. Really not sure, but I hope it doesn't hinder my Dr's decision on weather she'll give me clomid again when I ask. The last opk I took on cd8 was darker than I've ever seen one that early, so maybe. Come on AF! Time to start another cycle!


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## breakingdawn

My yearly is scheduled for June. If no pregnancy by then I'll probably mention in passing we have been TTC since March but I know it won't be cause for alarm yet. I can usually tell when O is getting close because of CM and it's scarce now so I doubt I'll test too soon. I've never O'd earlier than CD13 - I just don't want to stress too much. I'll start checking Friday! Unless I get weird signs sooner...


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## breakingdawn

So.. I am only on CD7 I think. Normally I would not ovulate until CD13/14. Is it too early for pre O cramps? I keep feeling some pain on my right lower side, which is sadly the side of my missing tube. :( Just hoping I am not ovulating from that side this month but I really feel like I might.


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## Dtrisha

Mod- but would they do that already ? I just don't want to waste my time going in if they'll say come back in 6 months we can't do anything.


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## breakingdawn

There are two things wrong with this picture. 1) it's only CD8!! 2) I've only felt pains from my right side lately, the no tube side. Is this month a total waste? :(
 



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## Dtrisha

I've heard plenty of time that people got pregnant from there tubeless side. I wouldn't say it's a absolute waste. And only cd8?! That's super early.


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## breakingdawn

I know. I'm hoping that test was a fluke because I'm not prepared for O this early I mean dang my fertile week is still a few days away!


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## Dtrisha

Are your periods normal?? Get a BD in if you can in case!


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## breakingdawn

They are 28 days spot on! I think we will be okay.. I really don't think it is going to go positive today or even tomorrow. And once it does go positive we have another 12-48 hours at most.... We are going to BD tomorrow night and keep on every other day until O hopefully!


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## Dtrisha

Good luck :)


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## breakingdawn

How is everyone doing? Good I hope! I just booked a beach trip for July so I am feeling really excited today! May surge watch is still on!! We are going to begin the every other day BD tonight I believe, I may try and sneak an extra BD in there somewhere if I end up with a super pos. OPK at some point! FX! :thumbup:
 



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## Dtrisha

I wonder why you had that weird surge lol


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## breakingdawn

OPKs can go darker and lighter all month, for me anyway.. Not really considered a surge yet until the lines match. I do feel like I will ovulate from my right side this month which sucks. :( There's a tiny chance my good tube will go pick up the egg from the other side. It's rare but it does happen..


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## breakingdawn

Opk today:
 



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## breakingdawn

Oh look... a POAS collage.. :haha:
 



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## Dtrisha

Looks like you're getting close ! :)


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## breakingdawn

I've been a bit more crampy today... Interested to see how CD11 opk looks!


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## Dtrisha

I can't wait to see!!!!!


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## breakingdawn

Well, CD11 is here. Testing for O in a few hours. I really don't expect to see a positive just yet. I think it is still too early. I am having a lot of gas today which is causing cramps. But most of the pain I feel when it settles is mostly my right side still. I strongly feel like that is where the egg is coming from this month. Which sucks! It would have been nice to O on Mother's Day and end up with a BFP because DD #2 was born ON Father's Day of 2012!!


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## Dtrisha

Your other tube could catch it !! Still try you never know. :). FX'd ! I have high hopes for you. I hope we all get it this month.


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## breakingdawn

Nothing doing yet..
 



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## Dtrisha

When do you normally O?


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## breakingdawn

Honestly it's been a long time since I've tracked. It was when TTC #2 in 2011! That was around CD16/17..


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## breakingdawn

CD12 and I just did an opk!!


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## breakingdawn

The day before Mother's Day...
 



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## Dtrisha

Yay maybe it's a good sign !!! Good luck :)


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## BronteForever

Good luck!


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## Dtrisha

I went to the store today for groceries and someone told me happy Mother's Day and I wanted to cry :(. I had no one with me so I'm not sure why they said it but it mad me sad. Ugh


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## breakingdawn

I'm so sorry. That's awful. :( :hugs:

I think I'm for real out this month. We BD'd last night and about 30 minute later I started getting bad chills. I fell asleep and woke up a couple of hours later burning up and throwing up. I think I have a stomach flu. There's no way my eggs or sperm will survive this. I feel like I'm dying.


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## Dtrisha

Oh no!!!! Are you ok? Try to sleep it off? When did you O?


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## breakingdawn

I got a positive early yesterday so I assume O was today. Last BD was around midnight last night. Def not okay feel really bad.


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## breakingdawn

Heart broken. My opk is at its peak on CD13.. And I'm in bed with the worst stomach flu of my life. :( The test line showed up before even the control line.
 



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## Dtrisha

I heard your supposed to go off of your first positive though. So you're probably still ok!


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## breakingdawn

Wonder if this means it released today. I'm having cramping on my good side but then again it could just be stomach bug related! That would be awesome if I O today because we got a Bd in around midnight last night.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah I'm thinking you're probably ok. Because everyone has always said to stop testing after your first positive because that's your true one I guess and people start getting confused when they keep testing


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## breakingdawn

Day #3 of a positive opk and my husband said he has zero stamina left even though I'm feeling better today. So disappointed.
 



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## Dtrisha

Oh no :( he can't make it work real quick? I'm sorry.


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## breakingdawn

No. He is being a jerk. And even if I force the issue nothing will come of it if he is not into it so I give up this month. On to month 4.


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## Dtrisha

:/ that stinks. Does he want it as bad as you? Or he just thinks it'll happen eventually.


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## breakingdawn

We have two kids already so this really isn't a high priority for him to be honest. If we had no kids I'm sure it would be different.


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## mod19

Sorry your dh is being a jerk.

I stopped testing on cd 20 with no positive opk, so I'm out this month too. Oh well. I've completely come to peace with only having one child, so if it doesn't happen for me, I'm surprisingly ok with it. Really considering giving away all of my opks and hpts.


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## Dtrisha

Just went to the grocery store and seen this girls mom that I've been friends with since I was little. We're not super close like we used to be but we're still like aquantances I guess you could say well She got married 3 months after me and we're not together a year or two. Well her mom tells me she's pregnant. And I seriously almost busted into tears in the grocery store. I told her I was happy for her daughter and what not but as soon as I got in my car I started crying. Why is it that she gets pregnant and I'm still not. Why is it that the people that want it most and have lost one or two don't get the joy. I knew I wanted kids since I was little. I don't think it helps that I'm supposed to have a week old baby right now and be happy as could be. I just don't know what to do anymore. I think if AF shows this month (which I think she will) then I'm going to call and make a appt with my OB. Hopefully she can run some standard tests atleast and go from there.


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## BronteForever

Dtrisha - I'm so sorry. Hugs. It definetly is super hard around when you were supposed to deliver. I had a really hard time with it as well. 

It's not a bad idea to make an appointment. Remind me how long you have been trying this time around?

I wish I would have gotten checked out more after my ectopic to see what was going on.

Mod - I had to give up opk and testing awhile ago as well. It was just stressing me out and therefore not helpful. 

Breaking - so sorry. But sounds like you got one time in your fertile window. It has to be hard if you and your husband aren't on the same page and it sounds like he has a lot going on for him right now. Hopefully you can get sometime in soon. Is he almost done with school?


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## Dtrisha

This will be month 5. I wish they would of done some kind of check up after my levels went to 0 and my period came back or something. I didn't have any kind of follow up which I thought we weird but I didn't know what to expect. 

I just noticed you are going to be starting IVF next month. I'm just curious but hoe long does that process take ? Like when did they find out you needed IVF and how long since then do you get to actually do it. If that makes sense?


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## mod19

Bronte...when you finally get your bfp I want you to let me know and I will make blanket for your first little one. It's kind of my thing to make these for friends and family, and since you've been through so much and have had such a long road, I feel it's well deserved. The pic attached is the one I made for dd. Sorry it's such a small section of it, but I had to keep cropping it cuz it kept telling me it was too large.
 



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## BronteForever

Mod - how incredibly sweet of you. I'd love it. The blanket looks so cozy and adorable. I really hope this IVF will work. Everything looks promising, but you never know. 

Dtrisha - I didn't have any testing after my ectopic and didn't know what to expect either. But it sounds like that's standard. I know I could have pushed for it but based on my history the doctors just thought it was a fluke. I'd definetly see if you could get looked at especially if they had no explanation for your ectopic. 

In terms of IVF it actually wasn't that long of a process. I didn't start blood tests and an HSG test until January of this year. It took longer than normal for me since I had issues with my first HSG test. So didn't find out until March that my other tube was blocked. Got into the RE in April and decided on IVF as the best option. We could have started sooner but I wanted to try to lose some weight and we have a big trip planned next month that messed up two cycles due to timing. 

Anyway I should have gotten checked out much sooner but just kept trying naturally until we were ready to move on to the next step.

There's normally lots of other options before IVF for most people though depending on what the problem is.


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## Dtrisha

Thank you for the input. Yeah I don't think I will need help hopefully I jut want to make sure. My friend Said all the had to do for her was give her medication to make her eggs more stickier and she got pregnant that first month. So I'm hoping something like that is the most I will need. But I think I want a HSG to make sure my tube is cleared.


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## breakingdawn

Ladies, I am taking a little break. Had a pretty big fight with husband last night because it seems like every month we go through this and I have to try and try and try to get him to put fourth effort into TTC and I just don't think he is on the same page. I have given up TTC at this time. I have had a really hard night and am pretty upset this morning. I will check in as I can.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Maybe just not try so hard and just BD when you feel like it and it'll happen ?


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## breakingdawn

Sadly that is not an option for us. I am 35 years old. DH is in his 40's. Our risk for various genetic/birth defect issues goes up every year now. On top of that I have had various complications with prior pregnancies including pre term labor (both times) which I have been told by my doctor may also increase with age. My chance for a second ectopic also increases yearly. So.. with all that being said, we just cannot "try occasionally and see what happens." My doctor said ideally before I am 36 if possible. That is in September.


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## Dtrisha

Oh honey I'm sorry. Unfortunately you both have to be on the same page :(. I hope he changes his mind. You know we're all her for you!


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## Dtrisha

So sorry for the TMI picture. But I had this today. It is CD20. I thought my cycles were getting better and back to normal. But now I see this. Ugh. Now what?
 



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## BronteForever

Breaking - I'm so sorry, but yeah, unfortunately you both need to be on the same page. Maybe once things calm down for your husband a bit he will be more open to it. i know you are fighting with age. I'll be 36 in September as well, so I feel you on that one and it sounds like you have added issues that will make it harder with age. But it doesn't sound impossible. I really hope you two can work it out and you'll be back TTC again soon. 

Dtrisha - hmm...weird. I'm not sure.


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## Dtrisha

Do you think by the OPK I'm getting ready to? Usually it will look like this one day then turn positive. I took some throughout the past two weeks on just random days and didn't see anything. So now I guess will BD tonight in case?
 



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## BronteForever

It does look like it's going to go positive soon. That's what happens with mine as well, they will slowly get darker. I'd BD just in case. It certainly couldn't hurt.


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## Dtrisha

Thank you. I will test again in the A.M. then too. FX'd


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## Dtrisha

Pretty positive right ?
 



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## BronteForever

Looks positive to me. Yay. Good luck this cycle.


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## Dtrisha

Thank you!


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## mod19

Yay for positives!

I was right, I o'd early and af showed up today on cd26. Now I know better for next month! 

Good luck trish!


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## Dtrisha

Oh no :(. Sorry mod


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## mod19

It's all good. Recent events at home have me much more relaxed about ttc...I'm actually not entirely sure I want #2 now. Basically if it happens it happens, if it doesn't it doesn't.


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## Dtrisha

If I can have atleast one I'll be happy. I really want two but I'm not pushing that. With what we have been through I think one is enough right now. I'm scared will end up with twins though since my hubby is one. I'll take whatever I get but I would rather just have one to start lol. 

Mod- I'm glad that's your attitude. I really hope I can de stress if this isn't our month.


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## BronteForever

Mod - sorry AF got you but yay for being more relaxed about stuff. It's likely to make it much easier and take the worry out of your head. Then you can just live your life and let it be. Good luck!

Dtrisha - I'm open to twins. My husband only wants one child (I realize this could change in the future) and I'd like two. He's okay with transferring two embryos so I think that's probably what we'll do. We shall see.


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## Dtrisha

Bronte- I mean if that's what happens I would love them no matter what and we would be blessed. But I would rather have one kid first then maybe twins. I would be scared that I wouldn't be able to do it the first time around.


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## breakingdawn

Just briefly popping in to say hello and I am glad you ladies are keeping the thread going and being supportive. I have all my usual Pre AF symptoms which I get early after ovulation so I know I am out this month. Which is expected. Not much effort was made on the part of the other half. I will more than likely not even bother testing around the usual 10/11DPO. We still are not getting along and TTC may be completely off the table indefinitely. I will try and check in and see how everyone is doing but I have been very depressed. I apologize.


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## Dtrisha

True positive I think. Not sure if we will BD tonight or not. I think I pushed his limits with yesterday. Ugh. Don't know what to do
 



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## BronteForever

breakingdawn - hugs girl. I'm so sorry. I've definitely gone through stages with my husband that have been really hard on our marriage. I'm amazed sometimes we have managed to last. It's definitely work and we had counseling after our ectopic that helped since we had a lot of problems going on that compiled together. You can definitely work through it, if both of you want. It will just take time. I know it's devastating in the meantime, since it means putting TTC on hold. But you don't want him to regret the child or you, which could magnify everything and make it much worse. Hang in there. We are definitely hear to listen if you need to talk. 

Dtrisha - yes that looks positive as well. I think you will be fine if you got it in yesterday. Sperm can live in there for upwards of 6 days if the environment is right. But if you can get another time in and your husband is up it it could definitely help your chances. Good luck!


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## Dtrisha

Thank you! Yeah I think will just do it tomorrow. I think will be ok hopefully. If not then going to get checked out at the OB for a piece of mind.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking - I'm so sorry to hear that :(. I hope you two are ok. Hugs! We all go through rough patches try to stay positive. We are all here for you.


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## Dtrisha

I'm thinking I O'd yesterday. I had pain on my left side for about half the day. We didn't end up BDing but we're going to today just to make sure. Hopefully it is enough.


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## mod19

Breaking I'm so sorry. Unfortunately it has to be something both parties have to be on board with 100%, so if one party is hesitant, there's really not much you can do without making the situation worse. I think pushing it will just make him more irritated. 

Trish yay for positives! I think you'll be covered for the bd part of it. Good luck!

I flew home yesterday so dd and I will have a long weekend with my family and her cousins. I can't wait to move back home. It won't happen for about another 3 years, but I'm still so excited to come home. She has a cousin here 6 months older than her and they're so cute playing together. They'll even be in the same class when scool starts for them (the reason we will be moving when she's 4, so she can go to school up here in WI, they have better schools than TX)


----------



## Dtrisha

Thanks mod I hope so. 

I bet flying home is nice. I don't think I could ever move away from family I'm to close to all them. How come you moved away from them in the first place ? How old is your daughter ? I bet you guys will have a great weekend :)


----------



## breakingdawn

5DPO today. Although I am expecting nothing this cycle, I will likely take a test a week from today just to prepare for AF for certain. In theory I could test mid next week and would know one way or the other but just not into it this month. Next Friday I should be around 12DPO. Odd having ovulated so early. Hope everyone is doing well and has a nice weekend. Husband and I still really are not speaking a lot. He is trying to be nicer/more pleasant but i just want nothing to do with him at this point. :(


----------



## breakingdawn

I am going to start blogging again in my original TTC journal. The link is now in my signature.. just so I am not negative nancy in venting in all the various threads I am subscribed to. Feel free to follow if you like. I will still be here for support and small, non dramatic, updates.


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## Dtrisha

Well I'm glad he's being nicer! Try to be positive I suppose. I know it's not easy. 

I have no idea when I'll test. I'm trying not to unless I feel something trying not to track DPO as well because it'll drive me crazy.


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## mod19

Glad he's attempting to be nicer breaking.

I moved to TX cuz dh had a daughter there that he didn't want to move away from when she was too young. She'll be 15 when he moves. We have a lot of u Der lying issues going on right now though, and I'm beginning to believe he doesn't want to move because of his friends, and not his dd. We've really been on the rocks lately because he has a temper. I've told him numerous times to go to anger management, and now that dd is to a point where it affects her, I've given him an ultimatium. So maybe I'll be moving home sooner than 3 years. We will see.
And yeah, I know about moving away from them is rough. I'm super close to them. Dh made it seem like he was too, but been living there 3 years now and I've seen my family more than his, and my mom has seen dd more than his mom has...so I'm really at my breaking point.

Sorry for the tangent, it could have been much longer lol.


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## Dtrisha

Oh no it's fine. I'm sorry your going through all that! It's never easy is it ? :(. I hope things get better.


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## BronteForever

Wow ladies, I'm so sorry you are having issues with spouses.

Mod - hopefully your visit home will be restful and refreshing. It's never hard being so far from family that you are close to. Hopefully you get it worked out with your spouse and he learns to control his anger issues. That cannot be easy at all to endure. Hugs.

Breaking - wishing you the best and hope you get everything worked out.

Dtrisha - good luck. Sounds like you are all set for this cycle. Hope it's a lucky one.


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## breakingdawn

Hey ladies, I hope the weekend is treating you well. 6DPO here and not really trying to symptom spot, just some mental notes for me. I have been super gassy since about 4DPO, it is getting pretty annoying now. Earlier I had super strong cramps right in the center of my stomach, so I do not think it is AF / implantation related but rather gas related. They were really sharp and have since died down. Fun fun. How is everyone else?


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## Dtrisha

Hey. Doing pretty good. Just had some girls time with friends and now just relaxing around the house. Yeah I always tend to be gassy agent O as well. Super annoying. Hopefully it's implantation that would be nice :)


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## breakingdawn

Popping in to say hello.. not much doing at 7DPO... just some light back pain and very sparse cramps. Mostly feel like AF is coming along with general moodiness. I won't test until Friday or Saturday. Just depends on the mood.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking- fingers crossed for you ! I hope we get our BFP's together. That would be nice. Nothing to report her. Still kind of gassy and haven't gone potty yet :/. But that's sometimes normal for me.


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## breakingdawn

All my gas issues are mostly gone. They were a little crazy the past couple of days but now, nothing. Yesterday it was like I was starving. I would eat.. then 10 minutes later my stomach was hurting like I was hungry again. I ate probably 10 times yesterday. I also kept going to the bathroom. But oddly... everything seems to be back to normal. I doubt it is my month. I feel the usual PMS/Moodiness coming on. Right now I just have mild back pain. That is about it!


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## Dtrisha

Breaking- what DPO are you now? I keep losing track. I'm only 4dpo I think and I wish I could just forget


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## breakingdawn

I should be around 8DPO today..


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## Dtrisha

Oh ok. So you're still early. It's so hard to wait. I'll probably start testing this weekend lol. I want to hold off till next Monday atleast but I know it'll be hard


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## breakingdawn

I'll test Friday or Saturday. Something would show by then..


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## breakingdawn

Around 8DPO today... Not a whole lot to report today just very weepy. I have cried about 10 times today over random stuff. Normally I am more angry during PMS so I guess this month is switching it up on me. I don't really have any other symptoms. I had a headache earlier and some back pain but that is gone now. I may test Friday to put myself out of misery.


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## Dtrisha

I'm so sorry about the crying :(. I also have some back ache in the last hour or so. And I feel crampy in my uterus a little. Like it feels heavy I guess? Not trying to read to much into it. Yeah I wouldn't even be able to wait that long lol. Power to you :). Hope it's a BFP!


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## BronteForever

Good luck ladies!!


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## mod19

Bronte I'm super excited for you! May is half way through and you get to start ivf in a few weeks! I can't imagine how excited you guys must be!


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## breakingdawn

Also excited for Bronte. She has definitely been waiting patiently and giving me a lot of support so she deserves a big huge BFP. I found out a friend of mine was pregnant today. I felt like such a crappy selfish friend for not feeling as excited for her as I should have been. :( It's been a hard day. I'm getting some heavy feeling in my uterus also but I had this last month. Also getting a little crampy. Not much hope this month which is probably why I'm not testing super early. Friday will be the absolute earliest. I'm making myself wait. Saturday would be ideal but I'll have more privacy time Friday morning I think. Saturday's are hectic here.


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## breakingdawn

9DPO:
Woke up hot and sweaty. Cramps, back pain, sore boobs. (Feels like normal AF signs to me). AF is due one week from today. A little gassy this morning. I think that is it.


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## BronteForever

Thank you ladies. I'm routing for all of you too and wish you weren't having so many struggles currently. I can't believe we are almost starting IVF. It doesn't feel real at all yet. We leave on a big trip in two weeks, so I think when I get back from that it will set in a bit more.


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## mod19

So I know quite a few people how have either recently had a baby, or are pregnant, and my cousin finds out tomorrow if she's having a boy or a girl. I'm so excited for her!

On another note, one of my friends posted something on facebook about infertility, yet her husband is on steroids because he is a complete moron, and steroids make you infertile. It's frustrating because I do know what infertility feels like, and choosing to shoot blanks is completely different. Arg!

Anyways, things have gotten so much better between dh and i, so I will be using opks starting tonight since I ran out of time this morning. Felt a bit of cramping, so I hope that doesn't mean I o'd super early lol.

Bronte where are you going on vacation? And yes, once you get back I'm sure reality will set in!


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## BronteForever

Mod - yay I'm happy things are improving for you and you will be starting back up with TTC. How exciting!

We are going to Spain. My husband qualified for Duathlon World Championships (it's a run, bike, run race), so it's mostly a trip for him. But I love to travel and I'll probably ditch him for some of his pre-race stuff and venture to a few towns near where we will be. We'll be in Aviles, which is on the northern coast of Spain for most of the trip and then traveling to Madrid for a few days.


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## mod19

That is going to be an awesome trip! I'm jealous! How long is that flight? I remember when we went to London it was an 8 hour flight, which seems long, but the fly long ways across the states is like 6 hours, so really not too bad.


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## BronteForever

I think the flight is between 6-7 hours. So not too bad. I can't remember what our overall travel time is though. They keep moving our flight time up from Indiana so we are getting longer layovers in Philidelphia which is the first stop. However the airport is 10 minutes from our house and I'd rather have that then driving to a larger airport for a more direct flight. It's so much easier to leave from.


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## Dtrisha

Bronte good luck on your trip :). Woke up todY and my tummy is bloated and it never is right when I wake up. If it gets bloated it's a her I eat or a few hours after I get up. Trying not to look to close into it but you never know. Fingers crossed for sure. And hopefully it's on the right spot and sticky if I am!


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## breakingdawn

Hi ladies, it is going to be a :bfn: for me this month. I am at least 10DPO today and negative tests and ALL my normal AF signs. I know my body super super well. There is no baby on board. I have also pushed DH a little too far and we may not be trying any longer. I just need some time to cope. Prayers appreciated


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## mod19

Bronte that's nice being nice and close to the airport! And as much as they suck a layover that's too long is better than one that's too short. I fly a lot and have been stuck at multiple airports because my flight left late and my connecting flight left, so as enticing as a 45 minutes layover sounds, it can turn into an 8 hour one!

Trish I hope this means good things for you! Good luck!

Breaking I'm sorry for what you're going through.

Afm-I'm still on the fence about #2 now. I keep going back and forth with it. I'm so incredibly happy with dd, and after what happened the past few weeks I'm not so sure bringing another baby into is would be the best decision. I hate this!


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## breakingdawn

Ladies, how is everyone? I am just waiting for AF to come on Tuesday. :bfn: this month. On the plus side.. my husband says he is back on the baby train. He said the pressure got the best of him so I will try to not be as demanding as I was last month and do my best to make it more fun. Maybe that will help. I have a really good feeling I will ovulate form my good side in June because it has been alternating like clockwork every month so far.... here's hoping.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - glad you are back on the baby making train. There are so many ups and downs during this process. Good luck. I think there's a great chance you'll ovulate from your good side this month as well. 

Mod - good point. I'd rather have a longer layover then miss a flight. Don't feel like you have to rush into anything. Either way we'll be here to cheer you on. 

Dtrisha - any news? Good luck.


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## breakingdawn

Month before last I ovulated on my good side but I missed O because I tested too late I think! This time I will be better prepared so hopefully we have a much better chance for June. I am also much more relaxed since DD is out of school so I think that may help too. I just felt really overwhelmed and stressed out this month with all the end of school year activities and running around. It was exhausting.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking that's really good news! I'm happy yes back on board. 

Bronte - well had brown sporting when I peed yesterday. Usually that means AF so I'm just waiting on her arrival. She should be here today. :(. I'm going to make a OBGYN appointment because my LP is to short. If I start today it'll be 10 DPO with the sporting yesterday. I think that's what our problem is.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - I think it will help a ton now that your husband is out of school for the summer. He sounded really busy which I'm sure was stressful. 

Dtrisha - that is short. Hopefully they can run several tests for you to check various levels to see what might be causing the short LP. Did you spot before your period before your ectopic?


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## Dtrisha

No never. I had 14 days for LP and never spotted I knew exactly when she would come and came that day on the T. So now everything is screwed up. Still waiting on AF in sure she will be here by the end of the day


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## mod19

Breaking so glad this month will be much more relaxed! It's crazy that we both had a goofy cycle last month. I must have o'd around day 8 or 9, which is a good week early for me.

Trish sorry about the spotting, but they say you're not out till af comes.

So I went through dd stuff yesterday that she doesn't use anymore or can't fit in, and now i want another one. I hate not being able to make up my mind. Still have a few days to think on it, and I'm sure we'll try this month because dh really wants a boy, but I still don't know if it's the best decision for us right now. Of course, I can't talk to dh about this because he is the reason I'm feeling this way and if I bring it up it'll start a fight. Grr!

Bronte your trip is getting closer!


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## Dtrisha

Thanks we will see I supposed. But it's always the same every month now so I think it's her. 

Yeah I wouldn't stop trying if you're not 100% about it. You would feel awful if it was the wrong decision.


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## breakingdawn

The TTC process is awfully stressful, isn't it? It's never taken us 4 months to conceive, 3 at the very most including the ectopic. So I'm now stepping into uncharted territory and scared I may now have fertility issues or something - aside from the one tube problem. I'm wondering though. Many websites said it may take your body three months to regulate after being on the pill. I stopped the pill in March. So I'm not even sure if I've been ovulating until just this month when I got my first positive opk. So, if thats the case... I won't panic just yet. When we get to 7 or 8 months I may worry a bit.. I know that isn't long for most people but it's not normal for me.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking- yeah if I'm not this month it's off to the doctors because I think something is off for sure.


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## breakingdawn

I need some help (TMI)... my husband and I just had sex, my period is not due until Tuesday. Afterwards, it seems like it started but was a really light weird pink (but a good amount). I feel really crampy now too. :( Is this normal? I feel worried for some reason about it starting so early, if that's what it is.


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## Dtrisha

Need help!?
 



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## Dtrisha

Hmm
 



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## breakingdawn

What DPO are you? The blue dye tests are BAD about stupid false negatives and evaps... I would re test in a day or two with a pink dye test if it were me.


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## Dtrisha

11dpo and usually I start 10 dpo. Had spotting 2 days ago and nothing since. Yeah that's why I am not believing this. I went and bought frer and digis. I'm not sure what my body is doing :(. Thanks for looking


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## breakingdawn

I refuse to buy blue dye tests. They are awful. If no AF by Wednesday I would use a pink dye. If that was the start of something your hcg doubles every other day.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah I just wanted the digi and that came with it


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## breakingdawn

FX for you.. I am ready for AF to REALLY start so I can get this over with. I am ready for a whole new month and hopefully ovulating from my good side this time.


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## breakingdawn

Bleh.. so I am due for my annual visit to my gynecologist in June. I went ahead and made my appointment today. I planned it at the end of June so either it will be right after AF or..... hoping.. maybe... just maybe.. it will turn into an annual visit + pregnancy check because by then I would definitely know if we conceived that cycle. If we don't, I will bring it up to him that we are going on month 5 in July and see what he says about everything. Would be nice to ask him some questions I have anyway....


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## Dtrisha

Awh. Well I hope it happens for you ASAP. It's not fun trying and trying and nothing happening. So depressing :( can we just have our bundle of joys now ?


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## mod19

Trish I hate blue dye tests too...but I hope this means good things for you!

Breaking I scheduled my appt today too, but I couldn't get in till July.


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## breakingdawn

My doctor's office is great about flexibility with appointments. And this is not really a fertility visit or anything just an exam/check up type deal.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah all other tests bfn so I think it was a crappy test


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## mod19

Sorry trish. 11 dpo is still early though, so there's still hope!

My appt is just for a wellness exam too. However I LOVE my ob/gyn, so I'm sure everyone else loves her too, and that's why she's booked so far in advance.


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## Dtrisha

Started spotting again so I think AF is truly on its way. It's pinkish red now.


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## BronteForever

Dtrisha - hope it's just early for you. I couldn't see anything regardless (I rarely see squinters from a photo people post though). But that's so frustrating if it was an evap line. 

Breaking - did you figure out your bleeding situation? You might have just caused it to release some blood early. I've had that happen before. 

Mod - that's awhile to wait for an appointment but it's worth it if you have a great OB-GYN. 

Good luck this month ladies. We are due for some BFPs.


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## breakingdawn

It was just pre AF spotting. CD1 is here.. on the positive side my cycle was a spot on 28 days with nearly textbook CD14 ovulation. So, at least there's that. Here's hoping I ovulate from my left side next month.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah I'm pretty sure AF is here as well my temping was half Full when I woke up today. But now when I changed it again barely anything in like 3 1/2 hours


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## mod19

Sorry af got you guys.

On cd14 here, so I should o within the next 3 or 4 days. I absolutely love my dr. It's totally worth the wait. If it's an emergency or you need reassurance you just call her nurse and they get you in that day, but for a check up you gotta wait. And it's ok. It'll give me one more complete cycle to track to help make my case. I'm really in no hurry here. When it happens s it happens.

Bronte how much longer before your trip?


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## breakingdawn

Oh I was fully expecting AF. I am telling you guys, I know my body really, really well. I knew I ovulated form my bad side anyway and while there was maybe a 30% chance the good tube could pick it up, it really is not that common and I had all my usual AF signs. Every time I have been pregnant I knew before I even tested because my signs are pretty different. I still try and hold out hope, and hope to be surprised... but for the most part I was prepared. Not that it makes it any easier..


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## BronteForever

Sorry AF got you ladies. Hopefully this month is better. 

Mod - good luck as you enter your fertile period. I love your attitude of being ok and accepting upfront whatever happens each month. We can't change it regardless and I love how positive you always are about it. 

We leave a week from today for our trip. I'm excited. 

Had another appointment with my doctor and nothing big to worry about. So we are definetly starting IVF next cycle. I'm on CD2 so should be here before we know it. I'm sure I'll slowly get more nervous as the month goes along.


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## breakingdawn

Bronte I am really really excited for you! That would be fun if we both got BFPs around the same time. :) I try so hard to have a positive attitude every month but unfortunately I am a negative nancy. My husband hates that about me. He is a SUPER positive kind of guy.


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## mod19

Ahhh so excited for you to start! How long does it take start to finish? When they retrieve your eggs do they use them that cycle? It's such an interesting process.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - I'd love it if we got BFPs at around the same time! I'm pretty negative in general as well, most of the time. My husband is the positive/nice one in the relationship as well.

Mod - it is an interesting process. I'll be on meds for about two weeks, then they will do egg retrieval, fertilize the egg, and hopefully I'll get lots of embryos that fertilize and start developing. They can transfer between 3-6 days later if you do a fresh cycle. However, we will likely be doing genetic testing, which will increase my odds by 30 percent given my age. It's more money, but at my age apparently 50 percent of the eggs I release will be "abnormal" and when you are by-passing nature the odds of transferring eggs that are abnormal are high because it's not a natural selection if you will. Doing genetic testing alleviates that and increases changes of implantation and significantly decreases odds of a miscarriage. Since we will likely be doing that, we will freeze all the embryos, wait a month, get the results back, and put in the best 1 or 2 embryos in a frozen cycle. So all in all it should take about a month and a half.

My doctor said given all my issues, my chance of success with doing PGS is 80 percent, which just seems incredibly high to me. The stats are normally much lower, so I'm not sure where that stat came from. If it doesn't work the first time around though, we are paying upfront for another fresh cycle and we get unlimited frozen cycles in our package as well.


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## breakingdawn

Cd2... the time is dragging... and AF is NOT being nice this month. At least it is 100% normal though! I am not really looking forward to ovulation stalking and then of course waiting... this process wears me out sometimes.


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## mod19

So basically you have an 80% chance of being pregnant in 2 months! That's so awesome! Bronte thanks for the info and ease keep us updated in the process. I know there's shots and meds you have to take. 

Breaking it does drag. 

I got my first day of ewcm. I usually get one day of a lot of it and then that's it. So we'll see. It was our anniversary yesterday, and we went out to eat, but by the time we got home and did laundry and dishes and dh had to go meet a guy to give him something from work, we were just too tired. So I promised him tonight anyways.


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## BronteForever

Mod - when you put it that way that does seem crazy. Eeekkk. Yes there will be lots of injections, multiple times a day. I'm not too worried about those though. Needles don't scare me much, but I have never had to give injections to myself so that should be interesting at least.

Anyway, happy anniversary yesterday and hopefully you can find some time with your husband this evening. 

Breaking - yeah, I had to stop at some point with OPK and just place my best guess on how my body was behaving. It was less stressful for me to do that. But everyone finds their perfect combination that helps them. Regardless, it still seems to make the months go extra long.


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## Dtrisha

Bronte I can't wait to hear how it goes! 

Mod- happy anniversary! Ours is in a few weeks :) 

Nothing to much going on with me. Just hoping to conceive this month. Taking b6 to see if that works at all to give me a longer LP. but nothing fun over here. Just dealing with AF and she's not being nice today I haven't been feeling well. Hopefully she is gone soon. 

How's everything goin with everybody ?


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## breakingdawn

Happy anniversary to you guys Mod! :)

Bronte.. you are totally right about OPKs really dragging out the month, plus being stressful. I just really need to know though... we could probably blindly guess, but like I said.. his stamina is not what it use to be so we have to make those few times really count. :(

FX to you Dtrisha.. I really need to start taking some vitamins.

DH is totally back on the baby train this month.. he seems to be more than ready to go as much as he can. Let's hope this holds up and holds off as long as necessary LOL. I have definitely changed my attitude about it and I think it has really helped.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking - yay so happy for you! Maybe it'll be your month ! :) positive thoughts for you. 

I've been feeling so sick to my stomach today. I'm on my third period day and it's still light flow. I don't like feeling sick to my stomach. I feel like something is wrong. I think I'm going to make a appointment with my gyno ASAP to see what she says.


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## breakingdawn

I am sorry to hear you are not feeling well. :( I hope it gets sorted soon.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah I don't know what's going on. I have a OB appointment the 7th to talk about everything. I'm tired of feeling so run down during my period. I had to call of work yesterday because I felt so nauseated. I hope I don't have endometriosis or something. Ugh. I'm still not feeling 100% but definitely a little better.


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## breakingdawn

Hoping it is nothing serious. I have my appointment for the end of June.. just an annual sort of visit although I am sure I will ask some questions. Especially if I am not pregnant by then.


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## Dtrisha

Yeah I hope it's not. I hope it's just like I'm missing a vitamin or something. I just can't keep doing this. I can't keep feeling sick. It's bad enough to see a period. Then to feel so sick to your stomach like the flu is no fun. Hopefully I can get blood work and what not.


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## breakingdawn

:hugs:


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## Dtrisha

Hopefully you are before your appt though. Would make things easier


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## breakingdawn

I know.. I booked my appointment a little bit after when AF was suppose to be gone. Just in case she did come, I would not book the appointment DURING it. So, that would be great if it was an annual + pregnancy visit. One can hope.


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## mod19

Morning ladies.

Well my body pulled a breaking. Yesterday I finally got a second line that was visible, but clearly not positive. Negative last night (ok I had a lot to drink while I was cleaning) but then negative again this morning. Either I missed it completely or I didn't O. And I usually have 2 days of positives. It's weird.

How is everyone else?


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## breakingdawn

A short surge is not unheard of. But I normally have 2-3 days of positives too. But the lines can fluctuate so I would still keep testing honestly... 

I just had a thought today... Technically I might conceive around Father's Day (I mean IF it happens, it would be around that time).. DD #2 was born ON Father's Day in 2012. I hope this is a good sign.....


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## Dtrisha

Breaking FINGERS CROSSED for you!! Sorry I've been MIA lately. Just dealing with AF and not feeling the vest. Of course it's a long weekend and I feel like shit. I had that nausea fir a day or two and now my throat is sore. So it's just been relaxation for me. 

Hope everything is well ladies.


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## breakingdawn

CD6 and AF has left the building! Whoop whoop! I'm going to start checking for O around CD9. I decided I'm testing on Father's Day. Originally I was going to test the Friday or Saturday before Father's Day but... DD#2 has her 4th birthday party that Saturday and I don't want to be disappointed by a BFN during her party if we didn't catch the egg. So, maybe Father's Day will bring us some luck.


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## BronteForever

Mod - hopefully O shows or you got in some time and might have just missed it on the test. It's so hard to tell sometimes. 

Dtrisha - hope you start feeling better. It's so annoying when AF shows to begin with and when it makes you sick it's even more frustrating. 

Breaking - hopefully Fathers Day does the trick again and so glad your husband is less stressed and more into TTC now. My husband gets that way if he has too much going on in life it's hard for him to communicate or want to do anything together. I can't imagine being in school and working full time on top of it. Good luck to you.


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## breakingdawn

Thanks! He definitely seems more willing this time around but he definitely gets tired easily. If we can get in 4 tries right before and during O I will be content with that. After all, we only BD'd twice when I got pregnant with #2!


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## breakingdawn

Where are all my ladies at? Crickets in here...

Well, CD8 for me. I am going to start testing for O tomorrow. Hoping to see another positive OPK this month.

I have a good friend going to the hospital tomorrow night for induction, she is 41 weeks. I have another friend who just had her ultrasound today with a healthy baby inside. I am happy for both of them, don't get me wrong. Just sad for me. How selfish is that? Ugh. :(

How is everyone else?


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## Dtrisha

Hey sorry just been relaxing haven't been feeling the greatest. I'm thinking I'm going to start testing for O tomorrow. I've been taking b6 so hopefully it lengthens things out. I'm actually getting ready for a interview so I'm super nervous lol. Hope all is well for everyone :)


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## breakingdawn

Good luck with your O testing! :) I will be testing in a couple of hours. Not expecting to see much at CD9, at least I hope not. We are not starting the BD train until tonight, I think, LOL!


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## breakingdawn

CD9! Whoop! :dance: Right on track so far... FX
 



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## Dtrisha

Yay good luck. I wish mine were the same every month lol


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## breakingdawn

So.. I HAVE to share this. A good friend of mine (who is tiny) had a baby girl very early this morning. Her baby... weighs 10lbs and 9oz!!!! :shock: She had that baby vaginally... no tears.. nothing. :saywhat:


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## Dtrisha

Ugh I wake up and turn over to look at my phone like always before I roll out of bed. And what is the FIRST thing on FB sharing me in the eye? A freakin baby announcement that one of my friends is pregnant. She got married a few months after us and I can't help but be mad and want to cry. Does she swerve it? Yes of course. But at the same time I'm READY for our rainbow baby. We have been doing EVERYTHING right. And NOTHINGGGG. I just don't know why we didn't have it easy the first time around like 80% of the people that get pregnant. And then to top it off. My sister in law is pregnant to and my husband knew and didn't want to tell me because he knew how upset I have been about it. We go to my mothe tin laws this last weekend and she's like hey did you hear that the baby shower is next month on this day and blah blah blah. I'm like no I didn't and I don't wanna know ugh. The girl had a hard time getting pregnant years ago but ended up giving up and then she got pregnant but I don't feel like that's the same as losing one and it taking forever to get pregnant after. I'm so depressed with this situation. Like when is it my damn turn!

Sorry about this I had to vent to someone. And you are the only girls that understand :(


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## breakingdawn

Selfish vent post: My OPK is very near positive today. I imagine it will be positive again at CD12 this month. I am feeling a fair amount of right sided pain (again) this month. :( It makes me not even want to bother anymore. So frustrating. :sad:

I am sorry Dtrisha. Trust me, I completely understand right now.
 



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## mod19

Hey trish, I'm so sorry. I can look at it from both sides of the story. I've had multiple losses and I also went over 4 years ttc, so I know both sides well. 

I'm not trying to be a butthead, but if she's suffered from infertility I really think she needs the support. Going through infertility you're not even sure you can get pregnant and there's absolutely no answers anyone can give you as to if you ever will be able to. And its heartbreaking to think you may never have a baby of your own. You become obsessive and depressed that you can't do the one thing your body was designed to do.

Losses are a bit different as you have to go through a grieving process, and yes, get sick of seeing babies and pregnant woman. It's not fair that all these women get to have babies and yours got taken away. And you'll hear this all to much with losses, but the good news is you CAN get pregnant. I hated hearing that, from family, friends, doctors, but it's true. And after you do get a sticky, you'll understand the true meaning of that one simple statement.

Neither situation is easy or ideal, but for women who have suffered losses vs women that haven't even had that, there is comfort in the knowing that you work.

Sorry. Again not trying to make you feel bad, I just want to provide an understanding. 

I threw myself into as many baby showers as I could before I got pregnant. It was fun, you get to see the cute stuff and what you may or may not like in a shower. Like, afrer seeing so many "decorate a onesie" stations I decided to ask for a "make a headband for baby" station, and she has so many cute headbands...that she won't wear lol.


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## breakingdawn

mod19 -- It is very true.. it is so easy to get caught up in the sadness and disappointment of TTC, especially if it is taking a long time while everyone else seems to get pregnant just by looking at their partner. But it is great to have a positive attitude because I do think it can go a long way. Things like participating in baby showers when you just want to stay home and sulk it is not yours, is a great way to just turn your attitude around and take some stress off TTC and maybe then it will just happen. I am REALLY bad about being disappointed too. Trust me. I just had a friend have a baby, another one JUST get pregnant, and 2 more friends trying who will probably end up pregnant before me. It is tough. But it will happen for you when it is your time and it will be perfect when it does!

AFM: CD12 here and a LOT more O cramping. A lot coming from my good side now. It is safe to say I have NO idea what side it is coming from now. We did the BD last night. I have a good feeling my OPK will be positive today. I am not sure I can get him to do the next 3+ days in a row so I really need to pick carefully. So frustrating because I am not sure if I will get 3 days of pos. OPKs like last time or not!! Advice?


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## Dtrisha

Yeah I went to a baby shower like 2 months after my loss last years HARDEST THING EVER. Everyone kept asking when it was my turn because I was married and it was so stressful. I think right when I left j cried because me and her would of only been a few months apart.


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## breakingdawn

Hang in there girl. <3 We are here for you!


Well ladies, the test line showed up well before the control line. I am so nervous!
 



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## mod19

Good luck breaking!


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## Dtrisha

I know. 
Thanks girls! 
OPK today barely was there. So it'll be a bit till mine goes positive. 

Yay breaking! Don't be nervous just have fun (I know easier said then done ) my hopes are high for you :)


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## breakingdawn

CD13 and another blazing positive OPK. Pain is now alternating sides so no idea if it will come from my good side or not.


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## breakingdawn

Here is a comparison of my OPKs. CD13 this morning and tonight.. I know the first two have dried so it is hard to tell, and it could be that this test did not have as much dye as the others. But the test line did not show up WAY before the control line, like my previous two. So I am hoping this means my surge is on the way OUT. I will test tomorrow around noon to see if it is lighter. We did manage to squeeze in a quick BD tonight!
 



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## breakingdawn

Think I just stepped into the 2ww...
 



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## mod19

Yup, looks like it. Good luck! I've been here for about a week now.


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## breakingdawn

Do you think we should get one more BD in tonight? I think I O'd yesterday or potentially today.


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## breakingdawn

How is everyone getting along? I am just twiddling my thumbs in the 2ww. Having some odd clear CM today and weird left sided twinges so I am going to do another OPK just to make sure there is not a second surge going on. Around 3PDO.


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## Dtrisha

Yay hope you caught it ! Almost positive OPK at 10am so I bet soon today it'll be positive. Doctor wants us to be the day it goes positive then skip a day then bd again since spermies lived 24 hours. Wish us luck :).


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## breakingdawn

Good luck! We BD'd both days of my positive OPKS on CD12 and 13 but not on CD14 when it was negative. DD#2 was sick. :(


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## mod19

Good luck guys.

I'm on CD 29 and just had some light brown spotting, which is unusual for me, but since my cycles have been off, I'm assuming it's a new way of af coming. Oh well. I've decided that dd is enough for me. If it happens it happens, but I won't be tracking anymore cycles. Plus I've just felt down all day, so I'm thinking she'll be here soon.


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## breakingdawn

mod19, I am sorry. :hug: I know it is hard. This whole process is so stressful. I am considering a relaxed approach next month. We will see.


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## mod19

Thanks breaking. I'm not down about ttc or the spotting, just in general. I'm so unhappy with where I'm living and just want to go home that it's starting to really get to me.

Dh thinks I'm doing some spring cleaning, but I'm condensing to make a move easier...


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## breakingdawn

Where is home and where are you? That is hard... I will be sending a lot of positive vibes your way.


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## Dtrisha

Got a positive OPK last night so we DTD last night. Then like always got the super positive today where the line is darker. But doctor said its best to do every other day after my first positive so that's what we're doing. Hopefully it works. My birthday and our 1 year anniversary is this month.


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## breakingdawn

Good luck! I would be too scared to miss it doing every other day after the positive! I know I usually ovulate the day of my second dark one so when they go negative I usually already ovulated. The egg does not last too long and we can only BD late at night but I guess if we did the morning of the negative it would work. We just never can!


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## Dtrisha

Yeah my doctor just said the swimmers are not as fast so worth a shot :) 

Good luckkk. 

I'm not sure what day I O. Positive yesterday and today and now in the last hour I've had some cramping. Still going to BD tomorrow and Sunday to make sure.


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## breakingdawn

Not feeling much hope ladies! 6DPO and no abnormal symptoms, everything pretty much feels normal and usual for this time. Sigh. I've known all 3 times I was pregnant, even with the ectopic, before I tested. There was always one or two symptoms out of place or missing. This month, same ol' same ol'. Good news is I have my annual with my obgyn at the end of the month so maybe we can discuss things. Not looking forward to month #5 though.


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## BronteForever

I'm back from my trip. We had a great time and it was very relaxing, though we kept busy with my husband's race and all our sightseeing. 

Mod - I'm so sorry you are struggling so much with living far away from family. That has to be hard, especially with a little one. I'm sure it's much harder not to have a great support system. Hugs. Is your husband more receptive to moving at all?

Breaking - sorry you might be out this cycle. That stinks. Keep at it but it's great you have an appointment to look forward to. I think after 35 the cut off to get help is usually 6 months. So timing wise that will work out. Really hope you don't need anything. Though I've heard of lots of people with one tube having luck with Clomid or another drug since it would help you ovulate from both eggs each month. Hopefully you won't need anything though. 

Dtrisha - good luck as you enter the TWW.


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## breakingdawn

I am glad you had a nice trip! I am looking forward to our beach trip next month. :) I am not too depressed honestly. I knew it would be hard TTC again at 35 with one tube. Still hard to not get disappointed though. I actually do plan to ask about clomid and get his thoughts. Since I will only be at month 5, he may not rush into it yet. I don't know. I am having a little but of ewcm today which is a little odd... but not getting overly hopeful since it could be anything. AF is still about 9 days away.


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## breakingdawn

So, I am really scared guys. I did a google search last night about a cold and 7DPO... and I start reading this thread.. it turns out it was a thread *I* made... back in 2011, on my old username. Guess when I made this post? During the pregnancy of my ectopic. Not only do I have a cold now at 7DPO I have the same odd pains going from left to right like I did with my ectopic back in 2011. I am scared to death right now. This was my worst fear...
 



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## Dtrisha

Breaking try to think positively. I have heard of this with people that had a really healthy pregnancy too. Try not to stress and take it day by day. Whatever happens is going to happen and there isn't anything we can do. Try to keep busy and wait it out. Fingers crossed for you


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## BronteForever

Oh breaking you are in my thoughts. I know it's hard not to stress out. I hope everything is alright. I occasionally get radiating pains and think it's just from scar tissue. Really hope that's all it is and that the cold is just unrelated.

Keep us updated.


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## breakingdawn

The random dull pains have subsided. This may shape up to be just another normal month and BFN. Which I guess I can live with, as long as it is not ectopic. :(


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## breakingdawn

My stomach is just not feeling right guys. It is not AF cramps, not really cramping in general... just really odd soreness and random twinges. The best I can explain it is tight muscles like I have gone to the gym (I wish..). A lot is on my left side which is a little concerning. It could all be in my head, or just related to this cold. I don't know. Sheesh, the 2ww will wear you out!! :bike:


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## Dtrisha

Yeah don't over think, ok? I know it's hard but try to find things to keep you busy. What DPO are you ?


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## breakingdawn

7/8dpo


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## Dtrisha

Ok well try to hold out. I think you'll be ok! Stress won't help so be positive :)


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## breakingdawn

I know, I am trying!


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## BronteForever

So sorry. I'd probably be overthinking everything as well. But it's still early. But I've heard a lot of people feel twinges during implantation. So you never know. You aren't out yet and I wouldn't really be worried about the pain yet. Especially since it's gone. Yay. Do they know what likely caused your ectopic? I forget. And if that tube is completely gone the likely hood of it happening again is small. So try not to worry. I know it's much easier said then done. I will be a nervous wreck in a few weeks myself.


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## breakingdawn

I thought the chances would be low of a second ectopic! Then I started reading that those who have had a ruptured tube with internal bleeding can have scar tissue form on the other tube. :( So then I panicked all over again. I am trying hard to think positive. I keep telling myself it is probably too early if it was ectopic pain. So either it is nothing and normal AF stuff or possibly a viable pregnancy.


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## BronteForever

Okay that is true because I likely have scar tissue on the other side and I think it formed several months or even years after my surgery and now it's blocked it completely. So it can happen...but it's still not that common. And the docs don't even know for sure in my case. They just guess. Also, I'm pretty positive my scar tissue is on the outside of the uterus and not the inside which means it's more likely to prevent pregnancy than cause another ectopic. Or it could be endo that got out as a result of the surgery. I know this isn't helping. But your chances in the other tube are still not that high. It's possible (it always is) but try to give it a few days before freaking out. I was really worried about another as well. But worrying about it won't help. You will just know to get checked out sooner if you get a positive test and to be monitored properly just in case.


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## BronteForever

I also think your pregnancy after the ectopic likely makes your issue a bit different. I'd wager it was harder for scar tissue to form in your case since you had a pregnancy soon after. If that helps!


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## breakingdawn

Oh gah, I hope that helps. Now I am terrified I have scar tissue everywhere else. You didn't mean for that to happen did you? :haha: I guess I should have warned you that you are dealing with a true hypochondriac. I don't know how my husband has survived me this long to be honest. Needless to say my OBGYN will be getting an earful at my appointment the end of the month about all my concerns if no pregnancy. :X


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## BronteForever

My main symptoms are that I get pretty painful ovulations (some months it's not as bad but some months I've missed work because it hurts so much it makes me ill around ovulation time and there's severe pain) and I start spotting before my period every month now. Between 2-7 days before. Like clockwork. That only started about a year and a half ago. You have never mentioned any of that. So you could have some scar tissue but if you don't have any symptoms you are likely fine. I'm trying to help you. But I know it's hard regardless. If there's no pregnancy by your appointment date the HSG test is your best bet to determine if scar tissue might be a culprit and has blocked the other tube. As I said since you had a successful pregnancy after your ectopic you really have less to worry about. But peace of mind might help and be worth the cost of the test.


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## BronteForever

Let us all hope it's a viable pregnancy you are feeling regardless though. I have my fingers crossed for you.


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## breakingdawn

Thank you for all the advice. I was wondering if an hsg might be a good idea. I'm glad I have a doctor appointment soon either way. 

8/9 DPO today.. Saturday is getting closer. Nervous. :/


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## breakingdawn

I wish I could kick this cold. Last night I felt almost 100% better. Now I feel awful all over again! Throat hurts and everything! Now ontop of that I think I have a yeast infection and it is a bit painful to potty and a lot of CM stuff. :( Sorry for the TMI, this is not my week. As long as all of this clears up for Alice's party Saturday I will be okay!


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## BronteForever

That stinks. Hope you feel better!


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## breakingdawn

Thanks! I am a big ball of fun right now. I just need a bed. How are you getting on?


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## BronteForever

I'm doing fine. Though the week after vacation always seems busy with catching up. Also, just getting everything finalized for IVF. We had our injection training yesterday so all of that is set. Though each of the injections are slightly different. I'm probably going to make my husband give me most of them so it's his way of participating and it's less worry on me that I'll screw them up. I'm excited though. I have a good feeling this is going to bypass all my trouble spots and we'll have success. Hopefully!


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## breakingdawn

I think you'll have success. :) Holding out a lot of hope for you. Please keep us updated. <3


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## breakingdawn

I caved and tested much earlier than I wanted to. I wanted to hold out until after my DD's birthday so I would not be depressed and I failed. It is another month, another BFN. I should be about 10DPO and while everyone says it is early.. it really isn't for me. I never have issues seeing faint lines on IC's around 8DPO.. so now of course I will worry about an ectopic until AF comes. :( I am really upset today and it is so hard being in the forums seeing everyone move on month by month with their BFPs. Some after only a month trying. I am happy for everyone.. but it is hard. So, I am going to take a little break guys. Wishing all of you the best and I will peak in from time to time just to see how everyone is doing. Bronte, thank you for the support and advice and I hope June is your lucky month.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - so sorry you are having a difficult time. I tend to stay off the main pages so don't see a ton of BFP announcements. But somedays they are harder than others to take. If it's easier to stay off here then I wish you well. Keep us updated on your status. Hope you have good news to share soon.


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## breakingdawn

Ladies, I am coming back on tonight for help. I am super scared. I mentioned having some type of yeast infection... can this cause random bleeding? I went to the bathroom just now because I felt a *lot* of CM, when I wiped there was *definite* blood there. It was not bright red.. just a weird brown color... but unmistakable. I am about 9/10DPO but I appear to have some sort of infection. It is not any worse than those I have had in the past and this is the first time I have noticed it. It really scared me! My period is not due until Tuesday next week.


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## BronteForever

I don't know much about yeast infections since I've never had one but when I spot before my period now it's almost always brown. That just means it's old blood that didn't come out with the last period. They don't know for sure why I randomly starting spotting either. I'm convinced it has to be linked to my ectopic somehow. Either because of scar tissue or some reason. Mine started 1.5-2 years ago. So a good five years after my ectopic and it just randomly started one month and now happens every month. At first I kept thinking it was inplamentation blood because sometimes it happens up to a week before my period. 

Sorry I can't help explain. I'm sure it could be the yeast infection and it just moved some old blood. If it continues though it might be your new normal. None of my doctors have been concerned about it. But it is annoying not to know why it happens for sure.


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## BronteForever

I don't know much about yeast infections since I've never had one but when I spot before my period now it's almost always brown. That just means it's old blood that didn't come out with the last period. They don't know for sure why I randomly starting spotting either. I'm convinced it has to be linked to my ectopic somehow. Either because of scar tissue or some reason. Mine started 1.5-2 years ago. So a good five years after my ectopic and it just randomly started one month and now happens every month. At first I kept thinking it was inplamentation blood because sometimes it happens up to a week before my period. 

Sorry I can't help explain. I'm sure it could be the yeast infection and it just moved some old blood. If it continues though it might be your new normal. None of my doctors have been concerned about it. But it is annoying not to know why it happens for sure.


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## breakingdawn

This is the first time I've ever had spotting this early. It was mixed in with a TON of cm which also isn't normal so it has to be either infection related or by some miracle IB. But I'm having light back pain now and cramps. I'm nervous about what's going on. :(


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## BronteForever

It could be IB. Let's hope so! Even if you don't normally get it, it's possible. Try not to get your hopes up to much. I did everytime I saw it too and it made it worse. It's possible especially the timing. But if you noticed infection first it's probably related to that.


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## breakingdawn

Oh trust me, hopes not up. I'm more terrified I have some horrible medical issue. :X


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## BronteForever

Oh - I really wouldn't worry about that. I think you are fine. Blood within a week of your period starting isn't too bad especially since it's brown. The CM is just probably trying to help clean out the infection...maybe. I don't know. But you might need to visit the doc for some meds. Maybe they will put your mind at ease. Good luck.


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## breakingdawn

Infection seems to be improving. Haven't noticed anymore bleeding (yet). Of course now I'm scared to go to the bathroom in case I do see it.


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## breakingdawn

I have more TMI and I apologize!!!


Spoiler
I went to the bathroom just now for #2, sadly it was not normal #2... ew. More brown CM when I wiped, a LOT. Wondering if I should call my doctor or just relax and see what happens. The infection seems to be tapering off. It was a light brown color, not really pink and no red.


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## BronteForever

The call to the doc shouldn't hurt. I'm sure you are fine. I just wondered if you might need an antibiotic for the infection or not. But if it's getting better then you are likely fine. As I said, it's better to see brown blood then fresh blood outside of period time. That's when you have to worry more.


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## breakingdawn

It definitely seems to be improving. Of course my doctor is out of town! But I'm waiting on a call from the nurse to get her opinion. Much better than google.


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## breakingdawn

It is looking like another BFN this month. :( The spotting is unexplained and it will be something I bring up on the 29th at my appointment. Hoping it is nothing serious or fertility related. I will let him know we have been TTC since March and see if there is anything he wants to do such as an hsg to at least assess my remaining tube. Does anyone know if that procedure can cause scar tissue? I just don't want to compromise it if it is already in good shape you know?


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## BronteForever

I've never heard of an HSG causing scar tissue. I don't see how it could. They just stick a catheter through your cervix and insert dye. I've heard it clearing out small amounts of scar tissue or fluid actually and helping people get pregnant. Though I don't think that's scientifically proven. Now to prepare you, I had a horrible HSG done. The first one didn't work actually and I had to go back and try again with meds to help soften the cervix. It was mostly due to my cervix I believe. But even with one tube you are going to experience some pain because the dye hits where it's closed. I had extreme pain and then passed out, but it was probably due to them dilating my cervix and forcing the catheter through. That's not common at all, but I wasn't prepared for the extent of the pain and wished I would have asked for higher concentration pain meds instead of just the ibuprofen they recommend before the procedure. Most people just have a small amount of pain. But people with at least one blocked tube will have it worse.


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## BronteForever

Sorry for the BFN as well.


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## breakingdawn

Thanks so much for the info. Yes, I took my best friends have an hsg done and it turns out she has two blocked tubes and he actually pushed the dye through and un blocked them. She was in a lot of pain. It scared me! But she got pregnant very shortly after so maybe this is worth looking into. If nothing else to see what we are dealing with.


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## BronteForever

It's definetly worth it to get a better idea of what you are dealing with. And I've heard several others saying it helps. Good luck!


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## breakingdawn

Thanks so much for your help and support!


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## Dtrisha

Hey ladies sorry I have been away lately. Another BFN this month. I really thought it was our month. AF showed again 10dpo. I'm glad I have ask for appointment this coming week with my actual Doctor. I either want blood testing done or maybe clomid or something. I need to get the ball rolling on some tests.


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## breakingdawn

I'm just hoping AF shows otherwise the week of early spotting definitely means something is wrong. Tired of worrying.


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## Dtrisha

Breaking- I'm so sorry :(.


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## breakingdawn

CD1


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## BronteForever

Dtrisha - sorry for the BFN. good luck at your doctor's appointment. Hopefully they can give you some answers. 

Breaking - so sorry. But at least you know and it wasn't another ectopic. Hope you have success next cycle. Good luck with your upcoming appointment as well. 

Ladies I know it doesn't help to hear it but you both are still pretty early on in the process so I wouldn't worry about issues yet. With one tube it's going to take longer regardless which sucks. But hang in there. It's not a fun process at all but you can do it and keep pushing forward.


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## BronteForever

Mod - I really hope you are doing alright and even if you aren't tracking anymore you are in my thoughts and I hope it happens for you. Good luck.


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## breakingdawn

I really needed to hear that encouragement thank you. I've been depressed all weekend. Crying daily. And no one to talk to who understands. I had to pretty much vacate all the other forums I was in because everyone just kept moving on with BFP after BFP and it was just so hard to see and I want so much to be happy for everyone. I feel like a horrible, jealous person. :cry:


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## BronteForever

So sorry you are depressed Breaking. I've seen a lot of BFP announcements over the years so it's become kind of second nature. Some months are definitely harder then others. It's completely fine to separate yourself from that. I stay off the main boards, because I think being bombarded with them all the time would be a bit much for me. Hang in there.


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## greekgirl

Hi. I just read the first few pages of this thread and I wanted to say in short that I had one good tube- the other was blocked with scar tissue, and I did get pregnant naturally so it can happen. It took us a few years but it happened. When I stopped breastfeeding my little guy we got pregnant within two months but it was ectopic in my good tube- which sucks- but it stopped growing on its own and then we just waited for the beta test numbers to go down and watched the sac "dissolve" slowly in my tube so no meds or surgery were needed. That was at the end of this past February. We just started trying again... Risky but we want to try. 
Because you never know. 
I just wanted to wish you guys the best. 
Whether it's via IVF or naturally I hope you all get your babies soon.
:dust::dust::dust:


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## BronteForever

Hey Greek Girl. Welcome to have you and good luck as you start trying to conceive again. It is a scary process after an ectopic because you don't know what to expect. Really hope you get good news and it's not too long of a journey this time around. So sorry for your past loss. Hugs. It's never easy.


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## mod19

Hi guys I know I've been away for awhile.

Bronte I know you said your trip was good...but what did you do?!?! I'm excited to hear about everything. So many things are so different in other countries and I love hearing anout/seeing them. When do your actual injections start? I don't think I could give myself shots either. Oh I'm so excited for you. For whatever reason I see you with a baby boy. Not strange vibe or anything weird, just how I picture you :).

Breaking and Trish I'm so sorry about the bfns. Reading I'm sure the spotting was nothing to worry about. Weird things happen sometimes. 

Welcome to anyone new!

Afm-I took ttc completely off the table. I told dh I'm moving home with or without him after christmas. I've started selling dds things shes grown out of and started an emergency stash if cash for dd and myself.


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## BronteForever

Oh Mod - hugs. So how did your husband take this news? Did he seem on board with going with you? It sounds alot like you are planning on it just being your daughter and you. Either way it's such a tough decision. I hope it goes well. Even if you aren't TTC please keep us updated and stay in touch. 

We had a wonderful time in Spain. We went primarily for my husband since he was racing in a duathlon world championships (run, bike, run). So about 6 days were taken up with festivities for him. But it was super cool to be apart of. The city we were in (Aviles) was on the northern coast and not nearly as touristy as many places I've been in Europe so it was fun to see a bit more authentic culture. Plus they had some neat opening ceremonies, parade of nations, fireworks, etc for the race mixed in with performances which made it fun. I'm big on just walking around and looking at architecture. So I did a lot of that while hubby was busy. I got a one-on-one private tour of the city too since no one else showed up for one. It was a great way to learn a ton in a short time. Afterwards we took the train to Madrid and were there for 3 days. Did a ton more walking and looked at lots of plazas, cathedrals, the Prado art museum, shopping, and way too much eating.


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## BronteForever

Oh and I started spotting today so AF should be here in about 2-4 days. My guess is closer to 2. Then I have a baseline scan on CD2 and if that goes well, injections start CD3. So I'll BD starting by the end of the week most likely!

And that's so weird you see me with a boy. I've only ever thought of girl names since I've always thought that's what we might have. But I think the mother is almost always wrong


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## mod19

I absolutely LOVE looking at architecture! It's so crazy to think how some of the things were made. And tours are awesome. It's very cool that where you were wasn't touristy. Just people living their everyday lives without all the exploitation must be so cool to witness. Not that foreign countries are a zoo or anything, but I'm sure you understand where I'm coming from. 

Yes, as for now it's looking like it will just be me and dd moving. He told me he can't leave yet, and I said that's fine, to cone when you're ready. I honestly think some time apart will do us good. I am resentful though that he's picking the dd that he sees 4 days a month and then hardly talks to when we do have her over the one he lives with. But that's his decision. We'll see what happens when the time comes.
Just to give you an example: dd was sick early last week. So sick that she missed Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday of daycare. (Last time I asked dh to stay home with her when she was sick he said no because it comes out of his vacation time, so I never asked again. Point taken) in the meantime I got sick and still had to go to work feeling like absolute crap Thursday and Friday. Friday I was working in the freezer all day and was he'll for me being as sick as I was. I pick dd up from daycare, stop at the store to get her some fruit (we were out and I'm big on making sure she eats well), come home, drop the bag on the ground, and sit down-something I was unable to do all day. Dh was busy getting ready for softball that night. He walks in says she's chewing on an unpeeled banana and says he needs to get ready and walks out. He knows I'm sick. He knows I was busting my ass in the freezer all day. He knows she's hungry. It would have taken him 30 seconds to put dd in her chair and peel a banana, but wouldnt, because softball was more important. I'm just done. Hes been doing more and trying harder since I told him I was going home, but I've honestly given up already and it's too late.


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## BronteForever

Yes I know where you are coming from regarding seeing people as they actually live. They observe siesta in the town we were at and it was actually interesting seeing everything completely shut down from 3-6 pm everyday. Love seeing simple cultural things like that. 

Anyway in regards to your husband I'm so sorry. It sounds like you might just need a break in general and I imagine being closer to family could definetly help a lot with that. You sound exhausted. Kudos to you for knowing what is best for you and your daughter and working towards that. A break from your husband might definetly help. My husband and I have done that from time to time and it is helpful. 

Though I'm going to be honest and say your husband sounds a lot like mine. We got in an argument earlier because he was trying to tell me his schedule in the next few weeks so I could work appointments around it and he seemed to be expecting me to control when our IVF retrieval happens around his teaching schedule and I not so kindly told him its related to my body and it can't be controlled. We argue about schedules a lot. Everyone needs their own space. My husband is also clueless unless I basically say EXACTLY what I need. That is hard for me to do. And you sound similar to me in that we try to avoid drama or arguments at times so sometimes just don't say anything and internalize it and just get angry. That stuff builds up so much until you can't take it and sounds like you have reached a breaking point. 

I completely understand and know how frustrating it can be. But at the same time I know my hubby doesn't do it on purpose. He's just completely clueless. We often joke that after 15 years of marriage you'd think we'd know what the other one really means when they say stuff or need something, but we often don't. Doesn't make it easier to deal with, but just know I suspect your husband is probably similar in that he's not doing it from a place of anger. He's just not thinking. Men are stupid sometimes. 

I really hope the break might help or you get it resolved before then. If you need to vent more please do. It can definetly help to get it out.


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## breakingdawn

Just popping in for a few ladies.. 

Mod.. I am sorry about all of that. I sure hope things work out the best for all of you. Sometimes a break can be good. One way or the other, I will be thinking of you guys.

Bronte -- I am wishing you tons of luck and sending lots of baby dust for your upcoming cycle. I will check in from time to time for the good news.

Welcome Greek Girl, this small group has a wonderful support system.

AFM I am on CD3 and things are slowing down. I have been worried about a few medical concerns and even for my dog as well. It turns out she may have another tumor which will need to be removed. :( It has been a hard, hard week. I have been extremely depressed. Her vet appointment is Monday.. my big doctor appointment to discuss MANY things now... is Wednesday. Here's hoping I make it through the weekend with minimal anxiety attacks.


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## BronteForever

Oh breaking - I hate when dogs are sick. This is horrible. Hope they can remove it and she's alright.


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## mod19

Breaking I'm so sorry about your dog. Good luck with your upcoming appointments. I hope they go well and you get the a swears you are looking for.

Bronte, yes, that sounds A LOT like my husband. He's in his own world and completely oblivious that I'm run down on taking dd to any from daycare, getting her ready in the am, working a 10 hour day, cooking, cleaning, laundry, feeding dd, cleaning up after dd, putting dd to sleep...all while he only has to look out for himself and then comes home and sits his ass on the couch and watches baseball all night. And when I say something about helping his response is "I worked all day, I just want to relax" grrrr! (Although, like I said before, since our little talk he's started doing more.) And thank you for letting me vent! I'm definitely like you and just don't say anything and walk around pissed off a lot, because if I do, then he'll be pissed, so I eff it.


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## mod19

Also I don't know why I see you with a boy, it's just what I've always pictured. I swore I was having a boy. Even had dreams of a boy. I'm such a tomboy I wouldn't even know what to do with a girl...then we found out it was a girl, and I cried, because she was supposed to be a boy. Now I can't imagine her being a boy. She's so awesome and amazing. God knew I needed a little girl :)


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## BronteForever

Mod - glad your talk has helped but goodness I don't understand how he can't see you are tired and worn out. Men. 

I'm going to tell you what would help with my hubby and maybe it will with yours. But as mentioned I have to be super specific. So if I said something like do you mind "helping" he automatically feels attacked and goes on the defensive. But if you mention something like "I'm going to get daughter cleaned and ready for bed, do you think there's anyway you could do the dishes while I'm working on that" might work. Stating exactly what you need helps because a.) he doesn't have to think and b.) he knows what to do. My husband also gets defensive when he doesn't know what to actually do. Then the bonus of saying what you are doing helps him feel a part of the process. 

Anyway sometimes just rephrasing it helps and definetly don't be afraid to say stuff...frequently. You need help and he needs to step up. I have every confidence you all can work through this. Since you are at a breaking point you likely don't want to at all. But when you are ready, I know you all can. Good luck. 

My husband and I went through a super rough patch after our ectopic. We basically had to learn how to communicate with each other all over again because we'd gotten to the point where we didn't even have any interest in the other one and no interest in talking to each other. But with a lot of work and some distance we did work it out. I'm routing for you!


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## BronteForever

Ha - and I feel the same way if we'd have a boy. I wouldn't know what to do. Even though I was a tomboy growing up and not really girly. Oh well. What happens will happen I'm sure. Though we might get to pick at some point. We'll see.


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## breakingdawn

Hey ladies.. how is everyone doing? The forum break has been REALLY nice. I have not felt stress or pressure about TTC at all since my break. But I do still like to check in here.

My dog went to the vet this morning and it is NOT another tumor. This was such a relief. It took a lot of weight off my shoulders.

My gyno visit is Wednesday. I am hoping to discuss some things and see where we will go from here.

I am on CD8 today and already getting pre ovulation symptoms. I started testing today for O just to be safe. Will keep you ladies posted.


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## BronteForever

So glad you had a nice break from the forums. I'm sure it can really help not to get hyper focused on TTC. And wonderful news about your dog. Yay!!!

Good luck this cycle. Hope the visit goes well and you get some ideas of possible next steps if it doesn't happen this cycle. Good luck! 

I'm on day 3 of stims and definitely feeling it today, since I'm bloated and a bit achy everywhere. But it's not been too bad. I have my next ultrasound appointment tomorrow and I'm very curious to see how things are progressing.


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## breakingdawn

Exciting Bronte! Please feel free to keep us updated here. Like I said, this is the one thread I will be checking off and on. I took a break from all the other threads because it was literally one BFP after another and it was just making me feel really bad... and I did not want to feel that way. I have felt so relaxed I did not even know what CD I was on until I looked today! I started feeling my usual pre O signs and was like crap, I guess I better check! Haha. :D I think I also won't be as hard on myself if it is another BFN in July since I am not so "consumed" in it anymore.

I hope things continue to go smoothly for you! Really rooting for you. <3


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## BronteForever

Thanks so much. I definetly had to take a break a few months. Having a more relaxed approach should definetly help. It's too hard to stay focused on it so much. Good for you. 

I'll definetly keep you updated on my progress. Stuff won't get too interesting until next week.


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## breakingdawn

I'm excited for you! :D 

CD9 here.. Started using opks just because of all the pre O stuff going on. Still negative. I don't expect to see much until CD11 or 12. We had not planned to BD until after my appointment tomorrow though just to make sure I'm okay concerning a couple different things. If the appointment goes okay we will BD tomorrow night I'm sure. CD10 is normally when we start anyway. Since I O around CD14ish!


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## mod19

Well guys...off topic (again), but one of my coworkers grandson was born yesterday at only 26 weeks. He was 1.6 lbs and 12". The picture on fb is so sad...he's in a zip lock bag to stay warm! They say both momma and baby are doing good and he's healthy...but that sort of thing scares the crap outta me! I was threatened to deliver at 28 weeks with dd, but luckily was able to carry her to term. Just thinking about that was scary...I can't imaging going through it!


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## BronteForever

Really hope the appointment goes well and starting BDing tomorrow sounds like it shouldn't be an issue at all, given when you normally ovulate. Good luck!

My ultrasound went well today and I have about 17 follicles she could find (11 on the left and 6 on the right). So curious how things will progress and if my scar tissue from the ectopic will cause significant different results in the two ovaries. My right one is the one that should have more scar tissue, so it is fascinating there are less; however, the sizes vary more that side and are up to 11 mm already, compared to 9 mm on the opposite ovary. So interesting.


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## BronteForever

Oh mod- that would be a horrible experience for them. But so glad he's still around and hopefully going to pull through. It's amazing what they can do in the NICU these days.

How are you doing too?


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## breakingdawn

Bronte - sounds good to me!? 

I'm really nervous about my appointment. I think I have a hernia. :( Which will put a damper on the TTC process. I've noticed a bulge on the left side of my stomach, especially when I bend over, and it hangs way lower than my right side. In addition, sometimes there is a mild pain - poking type feeling just on that side. I know abdominal surgeries can cause the stomach wall to weaken which can cause hernias and I've had three abdominal surgeries. Two c sections and 1 ectopic surgery. Odds are high this is what it is. I'm very nervous and scared. Please send prayers.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - well that sucks. Not fun. Hope it's not a hernia or that you need another surgery.


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## breakingdawn

I am fairly certain that is what it is, unless God forbid it is something worse. But the bulge is 100% not normal. :( It is very obvious.


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## mod19

Breaking I'm so sorry. When is your appt scheduled? 

Bronte I'm so excited for you starting this process! It's been a long time coming. 

I'll post about my life when I have more time because I'm sure it'll turn into a book again.

Update on baby-he's doing well. I didn't know this yesterday but he's apparently breathing on his own! Such good news! They have him hooked up anyways just incase though. And momma is doing so well! She's completely healthy now that he's out and only has to stay the standard 3 days for a c section. I make preemie hats and blankets for babies that are born too early so that they don't get handed their baby in an ugly hospital blanket and so they have at least something to take home, so I went home and made him a little hat and blanket. I'm so excited that I got to make one for a living preemie :)


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## BronteForever

Mod - what a wonderful and sweet thing to make for those preemie's. So glad you got to give one to someone you know as well and that he is doing better. That's great news. Looking forward to an update on your life as well. You have been in my thoughts!

Breaking - good luck today.


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## breakingdawn

Mod - glad the baby is doing well! 

Ladies, today was an absolute rollercoaster of emotions! I was sent for an immediate ultrasound concerning my stomach. All I heard was "ovarian tumor" and I almost passed out. However, the u/s came back 100% clear! No tumors, no fluids, uterus looked good... Annnnnnd she saw the follicle forming on my left ovary and said I would be ovulating soon (the next few days or so) and it's my good side!!!! 

So at this point all that's left is a pelvic / abdominal CT scan which my doctor says it's highly unlikely they will find something. So I'm thinking just maybe since I've lost weight it's a weird uneven fat distribution from all the past tummy surgeries. Of course if anything changes or gets worse I'll go through with a CT scan but for now just going to wait it out and see if anything changes or gets worse. I did lose almost 10lbs since dieting and working out! So it's possible there's a weird fat issue going on around all the scar tissue. I'm hoping that's all it is!!!


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## BronteForever

Breaking - so glad to hear that in the end it was good news for now. But yes the tumor word probably would have sent me into an immediate panic as well. Hopefully you can get the CT scan later to check it out if needed.

What did they tell you about TTC? Are they going to do any tests yet if this month doesn't happen? Good news the follicle is on your left/good side. Yay for small victories. I'll keep my fingers crossed it's more good news this month.


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## breakingdawn

I was so excited hearing about ovulating from my good side! I swear it was a rollercoaster of emotions today! 

So, he said since I stopped the pill in March they don't even count the first three months since it takes your body about 3 months to regulate after coming off the pill plus my age. So he's starting in June. Ugh. Which I understand. I don't even think I ovulated in March or April so he may be right there. He said if I'm not pregnant by February they would consider a dye test. I'm good with that for now.


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## mod19

So now that I have some time...

Bronte I'm so happy that they see so many follicles. Awesome news!

Breaking that's so awesome that it was nothing! Uneven fat distribution vs tumor = awesomeness! Are they going to start you on clomid if it doesn't happen for you this month?

Afm- well not much has changed really. Dh is trying now, and I can see that, but I feel like I'm already shut off. He even comes over to the sink now and asks if I want him to finish the dishes...what?!?! I've asked for your help for so long and now that it's too late, now that I've already made up my mind and my decision is set in stone, now you wanna help? It's frustrating, but doesn't make me feel any different. And im not just moving for just my sake. If it was just me I'd bite the bullet but a huge part is because of dd. She needs to be around people that WANT to be around her and are willing to help me out if she's sick and I need to go to work. I call into work at AT LEAST once every other work because she's not feeling well. At least she's finally getting tubes put in on the 13th. Hopefully that will take care of things since most of her issues are ear infections. But since she's so young they have to put her under to do it, which scares the crap outta me. Anyways, my family has see dd more than his has. Which is so sad since we have to fly to see each other and dh family lives 15 minutes away. Her cousins back home are more her age (18months, 5,5,6 and 12)) where her youngest cousin here is 8. But the fact that my mom has seen her more than his mom is reason enough to get her where she's wanted. It breaks my heart that my parents see all their grandchildren at least once a week, and she will go months here without seeing anyone she's related to.

So anyways, I feel bad that he's trying now, and I feel bad that I'm going to be taking his little girl away (he's started playing with her more), but she needs to be where she's wanted. It's just so sad it had to come to this point in order for him to start helping me. Up until now I've felt like a single mom...he waited until it was too late.


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## BronteForever

Breaking- February seems like you have awhile yet before needing to worry at all. Makes sense they don't technically count 3 months after BCPs. Hopefully that was reaffirming to you. Good luck!

Oh mod - I'm so sorry. But it really sounds like you are making the best decision to get you and your daughter to a location that will be better for you and provide you with a better support system. You really need to look out for you and your daughter for sure. I'm pleased to see he is stepping up and helping more. 

You said he has another child there which is why he doesn't want to leave, correct? How old is that child and how often does he she him or her? So do you think he could look into moving with you if you work that out? Or at least sometime in the future?


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## mod19

Bronte even in the summer when she doesn't have school we get her every other weekend, or 4 nights a month. And when we do have her he sits on his phone and doesn't even hardly talk to her, and makes it a big deal if we have to have her an extra weekend, so to say I'm upset that I'm here because of her is an understatement. She'll be 13 this year. He told me he can't leave her yet. I said that's fine, move when you're ready, but Laken and I will be moving next year.

I don't hate him, I love him, but right now I despise him.


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## BronteForever

I don't blame you at all Mod. I'd be upset as well. If she's 14 by the time you move then she's not going to want to spend much time with either parent soon, I'm sure. So hopefully he will see that he could still work out a travel schedule that could have him seeing her not that much less then he does now. I know it will be hard to work out, but you have to do what's best for your kid and if that means leaving then he can work it out with his other daughter, I'm confident. 

It is a tricky situation, all around.

Good luck!


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## breakingdawn

Mod - your happiness comes first. Just remember that.. well and your DD! Do what you have to do and what you feel in your heart is best. <3

Ugh well CD10 and I almost have a positive OPK. What the fudge?? We have not gotten in ANY tries because I wanted to have my doctor appointment first. Boo. We will get one in tonight at least. I don't see myself actually O'ing until CD13/14 so maybe we can get a few tries in before then.


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## mod19

Hope you get some sessions in breaking! Good luck this month.

So prime example: I feel like absolute shit. I know dd does too cuz we have the same thing. Dh had it about 2 weeks ago so he knows what it's like. There's this stomach bug going around thats, well...let's just say you need a tub while you're on the toilet...
Anyways, his friend calls, mind you he lives in Tennessee and gets deployed a lot, but now he won't watch dd so I can sleep. I never get sleep! I can't call into work because he never will and use call ins for dd...so now even when I'm not working I can't just be sick. I'm so frustrated! It's not hard to watch her walk around the living room with a sippy cup in one hand and a ball in the other! W T F?!


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## BronteForever

Oh my goodness Mod. Girl you need a break and always sound like you are sick now. It sounds aweful and I really hope you feel better. I am so sorry that your husband is not stepping up to help you. That's horrible. 

If you move back home do you plan on living with family for sometime or finding your own place?

Breaking - good luck. Hope you find sometime and O holds off a few days yo help.


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## breakingdawn

I agree, break time for you Mod.. and thanks ladies. We got one try in tonight at least! Like I said I feel a lot more laid back and positive this cycle. If it happens awesome, if not, there's always next month. :)


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## breakingdawn

I'm on CD11 with already a positive opk. Frustrating because it came early but it's okay. I think tomorrow will be the peak and I won't actually O until Saturday ish. We got a try in last night and I may hold off until tomorrow because every other day really helps with his swimmer count. Days in a row kills his stamina. So we will see..
 



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## BronteForever

Good luck breaking. It's sounding promising already this month! I love the relaxed approach as well!


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## breakingdawn

I already told hubby I won't harass him daily like last month! Haha.. Chances are I won't actually O until this weekend some time since I seem to have long surges so we will do another try tomorrow and maybe Saturday. Last month we did three days in a row and he was so burnt out by the third day there wasn't really any swimmers left! :X Worst case if I do O very early we still tried last night. :)


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## mod19

Breaking good thing you got in a session last night! Fingers crossed for a laid back month!

Bronte how are things with you holding up?

When I move home I'll be moving back in with my parents. They have a 5 bedroom house on a 5 acre lot, so needless to say there's plenty of room for the 2, possibly 3 of us.

We'll ladies, I have a sad update on baby. Unfortunately little man left us today. Apparently he had an infection which caused his blood to be acidic and there was nothing they could do. I'm so devastated for them. She can't have anymore babies because of how her body handles pregnancy. The next one won't even make it to 26 weeks, so she's done and has to bury one. My heart is broken for them. My problems are so obsolete compared to what this family is going through...:(


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## BronteForever

Oh Mod - how incredibly sad for that family. It really does put everything in perspective. So sorry.


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## breakingdawn

I am so sorry to hear the news. I'll be praying for them.


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## mod19

So I ordered this for her, with blue writing of course. The seller said they would put a rush on making it given the circumstances, which I'm so grateful for. Bummer the 4th is in there now though.

Sorry guys, didn't mean to put a damper on the thread. It's just that I work so closely with her and have a soft spot in my heart for babies with everything I've been through. It just sucks so bad that things like this have to happen.

So anyways... (someone please change the subject for me)
 



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## BronteForever

What a cute pillow and such a sweet gesture. Glad the seller is putting a rush job on it!

Change of subject...sure!

So injections are going well and my scan today showed great progress from two days ago. Added one more injection in for my evenings so to halt ovulation and not make it happen until we are ready. Everything is shaping up for a retrieval next Wednesday (possibly Tuesday). 

Also had to give myself a bathroom injection today...which was interesting. I don't recommend shooting up in a bathroom unless it's with a premixed syringe. I'm going to avoid that from now on. 

Super pleased with where I'm at though.


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## breakingdawn

Don't apologize Mod. We are here for you and I would like this thread to be one of support. Keeping you and them in my thoughts and prayers. 

Bronte, excellent progress! So excited for you!!


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## breakingdawn

Selfish post: CD12 and already a negative OPK. Well, that escalated quickly. LOL! Good news is... I did a LOT of reading today to make myself feel better and you can O as late as 72 hours after a positive OPK and the egg can survive up to 24 hours. We did try late Wednesday night (right before my positive OPK) but nothing yesterday which was the day of. I figure we will try tonight and tomorrow, then Sunday if we can squeeze one more out. Three tries was not my IDEAL but better than nothing. I was not expecting it this early this month. Bummer.


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## BronteForever

You still have time to catch it hopefully and you at least got one time in close to Ovulation. You should be set for this month. Good luck!


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## breakingdawn

Normally I O around CD13, if that is the case, that would be tomorrow and there is a chance the egg could hang around until Sunday so... today and tomorrow for sure. Sunday will be a back up plan. I am glad we BD'd Wesneday though. We almost did last night but I was so sure it would still be positive today! Rats!


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## breakingdawn

Ladies, I just don't know what to make of this. Positive (super positive) on CD11, back down at CD12, CD13 was VERY light. Now it looks like it is going back up!? How frustrating!
 



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## BronteForever

Wow that is frustrating. So sorry. I don't know enough about ovulation to offer suggestions of what causes that. But so sorry. Hopefully you can just get multiple times in.


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## breakingdawn

CD15.. guessing CD14 was just left over LH... it was not positive at the 5 minute mark but was darker when it dried. On CD11 it was super positive within 1 minute after the test was done. I am guessing O was somewhere around CD13, which is the usual.
 



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## breakingdawn

Beginning to think the slightly darker OPK on CD14 was maybe when the egg was released? If so.. at least we got a try in on CD13. I believe this month we BD'd on CD10, 12, and 13.. not a lot of tries in but hey, better than nothing. If I am not pregnant this month I am going to go forward with my CT scan on July 27th to see if we can pinpoint the issue causing my uneven belly fat bulge and sometimes slight discomfort. There is a chance all it is is scar tissue and fat but, I would feel better ruling out every possible issue. So, if no baby this month I guess I will be doing the scan. A little scared but I need to be proactive with my health.

I hope everyone is doing okay. <3


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## BronteForever

I'm not sure about the OPK, since you had two different positives. It is confusing to me. But I really hope you timed it so that all possibilities will be okay. 

And I think that's a good game plan if you get a negative pregnancy test this month, so you can have everything checked out for sure. 

I'm on stim day 11 right now and my retrieval got pushed back to likely Friday. Have another ultrasound tomorrow, so I'll know for sure when I'm taking my "trigger" shot so I ovulated 36 hours later. I'm super uncomfortable for the last two days, so really hoping it doesn't go further than that.


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## breakingdawn

The CD14 test was not positive at the 5 minute mark.. once it dried is when it got darker. So I am pretty skeptical CD14 was ever positive. CD11 showed up within a minute and SUPER dark so I know that was positive for sure! Either way it was somewhere around CD13/14 I am guessing.

Good luck to you! Sorry you are feeling uncomfortable. I don't know much at all about the whole IVF process but I know it is a lot of steps!


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## breakingdawn

Any updates Bronte?

Nothing here to report. I don't even know what DPO I am and I have not even been symptom spotting. Maybe because I've had little to no symptoms as of yet? Either way, it is nice to just not be worried about things for once. I am about to be so busy packing for this trip on Monday I won't have time to worry about it anyway. I won't even test until we come back from the beach and would probably be about 13/14 DPO then.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - where are you going? Enjoy your trip. It's the best time to take them because you don't focus on symptoms at all. Glad you are avoiding that right now anyway. Yay!!

My last ultrasound was yesterday and I have 15 follicles over 17 mm so we should get a decent amount of eggs. I triggered last night and have my egg retrieval tomorrow morning. Everything is looking really good. I'm set to freeze all of them in order to do genetic testing which should hopefully help lessen miscarriages or implamantation failure given my age. So transfer of the embryos back to my uterus shouldn't happen until early September now.


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## breakingdawn

Wow that's awesome!!!! The more eggs the merrier I say!!!! And good call on the additional testing. September isn't too far off. We are going to Charleston, SC. :) My aunt lives there and we love it and hope to move there very soon. The kids are really excited about going to the beach! I'm excited to be far away from my pregnancy tests in the bathroom! Lol! Zero temptation this month! I don't really feel like we caught the egg this month because everything happened so darn early and caught us off guard. And I'll be okay if it didn't happen. No more tantrums about it. :)


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## BronteForever

Oh Charleston sounds delightful. In fact I just heard on the radio the other day it was picked as the number one vacation spot in some poll based on value, culture, sights to see, etc. This was worldwide so kind of amazed it beat out the large European cities. But it is a fabulous city. Have fun. 

AFM - retrieval went well and they got 14 eggs, 9 of which fertilized. We had one that just fertilized late this morning. Yay. I know we are going up lose more. But I'm so pleased with where we are at at this time. Really hoping I can just do this one cycle and get multiple kids so we can just do frozen transfers in the future. 

Mod - how are things with you?


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## breakingdawn

Yay Bronte!! That sounds AWESOME. :)

I was wondering about Mod myself, hope she is doing okay.

We love Charleston, we can't wait to move there. Hopefully in the next 1-2 years. It is only a 5.5 hour drive from where we live now which is great!

I have no idea what DPO I am and again, not really symptom spotting. I had two pregnancy dreams this week which bummed me out. Normally I only have them when I am SUPER symptom spotting. I can't win! Haha. 

Well, we are leaving tomorrow and will return Saturday and I will probably cave and test then.


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## BronteForever

Enjoy your vacation and the beach


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## mod19

Hi guys! Sorry I've been mia...again! 

Breaking have an awesome vacation! I'm so happy for you that you're more laid back this month about it! I really think you needed that!

Bronte...eek! So here come the questions. Consider them quickfire if you will: did the egg retrieval hurt? What exactly do they do ro get them? What makes you uncomfortable? Is it the injections? If you're able to choose gender will you? Or will you just put one (or more) of each in there and see what happens? How come you have to wait so long till September now? Is it because of the testing? Ooohh I'm sooooo excited for you! And, ahem, make sure you don't miss a question when answering :)

Afm, been super busy. We're doing a reset at work and the whole store is getting torn apart. Aside from that I've been on the phone with the hospital and Dr office about her tube procedure. For such a small procedure they have been really stressing me out. I know it's so I can be better prepared, but how do you prepare for your child to go under anesthetic? I'm really freaking out about it. We have to be at the hospital by 6:30 tomorrow morning. I know she'll be ok. I know its a 10 minute procedure. I know thousands of people have this same thing done everyday, but I'm still worried about it. They don't let us back in until after they've woken her up...and that's not right! When she wakes up in a strange place with strange people with a strange feeling, mom should be there!


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## BronteForever

Oh Mod. I really hope everything goes good with her surgery and it helps. I'd be so nervous for her and I agree they should let you back there so you are there when she wakes up. Poor baby. I'm sure she's going to do great though and I know tubes can help so many infection and sinus issues so she will appreciate it in the long run. 

As far as questions, ha, I don't mind. 

* Retrieval itself didn't hurt at all because as my husband says I got the easy job and just had to lay there  They actually gave me anesthesia so I wasn't awake for it. Though I know some people are in other countries and I've heard it's bad. They use a giant needle basically and suck them out essentially. It might have been cool to see that but glad I didn't have to feel the pain. Afterwards I was fine and just felt sore for a few days. Nothing too bad. 

* Since the injections basically make the ovaries produce more eggs than they are used to they grow pretty big which caused some discomfort before retrieval. They start about the size of almonds and mine grew to about oranges size. A size I'm sure they have never been and aren't really designed to be. That's why they have to worry about over stimulating them because it can cause lots of health issues. 

* Have to wait until September because the genetic test results take a week to come back. Then since I'm doing a frozen transfer instead of fresh they like to give your body a bit more time to heal after all the meds so my doctor likes to wait through two periods. 

* We might chose gender. I'm torn on if I want to or not. I don't think I want that much power but don't want to regret not doing it if I have the chance to. So we aren't decided on that one. We'd be fine with either gender but think we'd prefer a girl first. 

Anyway we find out how many made it to blastocyst stage tomorrow morning. So I'm a bit nervous.


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## mod19

Haha thanks for answering all the questions. I hope they give you awesome news tomorrow morning! And hey, if you and your hubs can both agree on a girl, then go for it! It's crazy that we can do that! But you're right, it's freaky to have THAT much power over it!

Well my little miss Laken did well this morning, only problem is...she's STILL sleeping! They told me to expect a short nap and then to resume to her normal self, but she hasn't gotten up yet. I've tried waking her up a few times, but she just takes her juice and goes back to sleep. She hasnot eaten anything all day :(


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## BronteForever

Mod - so glad the surgery went well. Not surprised she's super tired still. She definetly earned her naps. Hope she feels even better soon. 

We didn't get great news today. Not horrible but not what we were hoping for. Only two embryos made it to day 5 and likely only one will be left tomorrow. The second one could go either way. Hoping it pulls through. This means we are canceling genetic testing and will likely do a second full IVF round. Shouldn't change the timeline too much. Just have to do another round of meds, retrieval and then a fresh transfer. Not our ideal. But we definetly knew this might happen which is why we bought two cycles upfront in our package.


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## breakingdawn

Bronte, hoping your eggs hang on. Mod, nice to see you! 

Quick update for me, last day of vacation. I had some brown spotting yesterday. :( I was around 11DPO maybe? I haven't seen anymore but definitely having strong AF cramps and back pain so I think AF may start at any moment. I'm bummed as this is early (I wasn't expecting it until Sunday or Monday) and also that it's happening on my nice beach trip. But it is what it is. So I may not be testing tomorrow after all.


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## breakingdawn

Never tested this month, am on CD2. On to month 6....


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## BronteForever

Sorry breaking. I had a particularly hard blow this week as well since none of my embryos survived. I've been a bit devestated. I'm going to regroup eventually and move onto the next cycle that we paid for. It's going to be a bit more challenging for me since I know it will likely be the last one we can afford.


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## breakingdawn

I'm really sorry to hear that. :(


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## mod19

Oh Bronte I'm so sorry! I should have checked back in sooner! Good thing you guys planned for this and are covered for round 2. Is there any sort of guarantee from the ivf place? Sorry I know toy posted a fewcm days ago, UT how are you holding up?


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## BronteForever

We didn't pay for the guarantee which would have given us back 50 percent of the funds after two failed cycles, because it was quite a bit more money and we'd have still been out 50 percent. So we decided to just risk losing that money. They had a 100 percent guarantee program that was even more and I'm starting to wonder if we should have splurged the money on that. 

I really hope this next round works. I feel alot of mistakes were made this round by my doctors, because my primary doctor was on vacation and I don't think I was being monitored as well as I should have been. That caused me to over stimulated my eggs, which I think ruined the quality. But there's no way to know for sure. However, we are paying alot of money to the clinic to not make these errors, so you can bet I'm going to have alot to say at my followup next week.

I really hope this next cycle works, but I'm not nearly as hopeful now.


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## mod19

Yes you definitely need to speak up! I know these practices are all private and rely on percentages to stay in business (I think in multiple ways. Are they regulated by the government with their success rate?). I'm so sorry but you need to think positive and transfer all those embryos and have 5 kids lol. Get em all out of the way in one shot. ;) when do you go back in and can talk to him?


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## BronteForever

I don't think they are regulated by the government per say, but you can research all the stats for each clinic really easily on www.sart.org/. So in a sense they do need to keep up their stats because they are required to report them, and my clinic is pretty good. I honestly think I just got lost a bit because my doctor was on vacation. They made two pretty big errors on not getting me scheduled for an ultrasound daily at the end (which I questioned at the time and was pretty much brushed off) and adding two extra days of stims for me. Those cost me dearly. But I know alot of it isn't an exact science with when to trigger, but if I was being monitored correctly it wouldn't have happened.

Now I don't have as good of info going into the next round, which I'm a bit pissed about.

I don't meet with the doctor that oversaw my care until next Wednesday and then I meet with my doctor on August 10 to talk about the next cycle. I was hoping to start that at the end of August. We'll see what he says about what to add in to help with egg quality and what might help me specifically.


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## breakingdawn

I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers that your next cycle is successful. Definitely speak up... you are paying a lot of money for this and these people should be giving their 110%.


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## breakingdawn

Well, I'm on CD8. We've now started the every other BD since I seem to O early. I'm not going to stress myself too much with opks this month. They usually seem to be positive anywhere from CD10 to CD13 so we should be covered if we keep it up every other day through next week. I do feel like I may O from my bad side this month, which is a bummer. But we will try anyway and stay positive. Thinking of you ladies and hope you are doing okay.


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## mod19

Bronte you definitely need to stand up for yourself and demand answers and "solutions" to the or slip ups. Who knows, maybe you'll get a free round


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## BronteForever

Thanks. Hope you have good luck this round breaking. Every other day is a solid plan during your normal fertile period. Hope it's from your good side!

Mod - that would be wonderful. I'd be shocked if they did that. But who knows. 

I'm feeling a bit better this weekend and have finally calmed down a bit. I'm anxious to get trying again. 

Mod - how are you doing with everything. Do you still have plans to move? And if so how soon?


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## mod19

I would be anxious too! But your doc is back, right? Hopefully everything gets done right this time.

I'm ok. I still plan to move even though we haven't talked about it since that day. I think dh knows. We went from trying to have a 2nd baby to me selling everything that we'd need for a baby. Literally everything. I've been so exhausted these last few weeks that I haven't done much besides work and sleep. The house is a mess and laundry is piling up, but oh well. I stayed home from work sick on Thursday but still took dd to daycare (which I felt absolutely horrible about!). I got home about 9am from taking her, ate a bowl of cereal and passed out. I didn't wake up till 3pm and still went to bed at 8 with dd. It's crazy how wore out I am. I even told dh that the stress and lack of sleep is getting to me and all I got was an "I'm sorry" and no action from him. I've been sick again for the last 2 weeks and can't seem to kick it. Basically I can sum up everything I just typed: I'm a big effing mess lol.


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## BronteForever

No my doctor is still not back. I think he's in Kenya on a medical mission trip which makes me feel bad I was upset. But I wasn't informed on that before starting and he was gone for all of my cycle. I don't think he's back for another two weeks. My appointment with him isn't until Aug. 10. The other doctor I had returns from vacation this week. So I meet with him on Wednesday. 

Oh Mod - you sound exhausted and if it's affecting your health so much you definetly need some more breaks or sleep. I wouldn't feel bad about taking your daughter to daycare at all. You have to take care of yourself too or you are no good to her. You needed sleep more and she probably enjoyed daycare as well. 

Hope you start feeling better.


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## mod19

Well I really feel like with such an involved and expensive process they need to be telling you if the Dr's won't be around. Mission trip or not, this is your money and you should have been given the option to wait till they returned from their vacations or to proceed without them. Maybe this first cycle wouldn't have been an unnecessary waste of everyone's time and maybe you'd still have complete faith in them. Just my own opinion though.


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## BronteForever

I agree. I feel the same way. But still feel bad about it. However if it was a planned mission trip they clearly had to know that in advance and honestly should be obligated to tell the patients in my mind.


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## breakingdawn

Thank you for the support Bronte! <3 It means a lot. I am really pulling for your next cycle. Continuing to keep you in my thoughts.


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## mod19

They really should. It pisses me off that thet obviously knew but failed to tell the or patients. And its not like this is pocket change here. You're messing with people's bank accounts and emotions. Ugh I'm so mad at them for you!

Sorry breaking...I haven't been meaning to ignore you girl, I'm just mad at Brontes Dr's lol. I'm sorry it didn't happen for you last month, but I'm so happy for you that you're taking the laid back approach. It's so much less stressful and you can enjoy life more!


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## breakingdawn

No worries Mod. I didn't think you were trying to ignore me. I haven't had a whole lot to update really but the usual... And I know Bronte needs the support and encouragement right now. I'm just in a boring limbo. Good news is I'm no longer depressed about it and I've come to terms with the whole "whatever will be will be" idea. It's made life a lot better!


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## mod19

Oh I'm so happy for you! It does make life so much easier!


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## breakingdawn

Thank you :) I am still loosely tracking O.. I have been getting a lot of left ovary pain which is odd because I was sure it would be from my bad side this month. Maybe not? I did an OPK today just to see and the line is fairly dark. Not positive, but I think it may be positive tomorrow or CD12 at the latest. I think if we can manage every other day this week, I will be happy with that. I know some women do daily BD'ing and multiple times a day, we just don't have the time or stamina anymore!


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## BronteForever

I think every other day is fine. Good luck catching it and really hope it ends up being from your good side. It's so hard to tell, because it really is random which side it will release from that month.


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## breakingdawn

Still getting a decent amount of left side pain so that's hopeful. I'm on CD11 and my OPK was almost positive! I took the photo after it dried but it wasn't quite positive. I think CD12 or 13 will be O day. Which is fine because we got a BD in last night and will do another tomorrow and last one Friday. I won't test anymore with OPKs after tomorrow since I'm having so many O signs.
 



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## breakingdawn

CD12, cramping (a lot of sharp left side pain).. Thinking O will be tonight or early tomorrow. We will BD tonight, Friday may be too late. I doubt he will be up for it Thursday though.
 



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## breakingdawn

Just a small update, I am 9 or 10DPO and I feel like I am seeing faint lines on a HPT. Not getting my hopes up yet.....
 



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## BronteForever

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. I don't see anything, but I never do in pictures that early that ladies post on here. But I really hope it's a positive for you.


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## breakingdawn

One more photo
 



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## mod19

I definitely see something! I can't see any color yet, but there is something there! Eek!

Bronte how is everything going?


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## breakingdawn

There is a light pink color in person and it did show up within 5 minutes. I'm only about 9dpo so I'm early. I'll check again Wednesday. I hope both of you are doing okay.


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## BronteForever

Any updates? Or are you waiting until tomorrow to test again? Excited to hear about it. Good luck!

Mod - I'm not doing great emotionally to be honest and I feel much less positive that we will conceive now than before I started IVF. I finally have my follow up with my doctor tomorrow but based on what the other one said I'm going to wait a bit to lose more weight and take a ton of supplements for egg quality. I start acupuncture next week. She recommends 6 months of it before seeing improvements in egg quality due to how eggs mature (though everyone else usually does a minimum of 3 months - longer is still better). Since I'm dealing with age it's not a great position to be in. We'll see what my doctor says tomorrow.


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## breakingdawn

Well, I could have sworn I updated with my new photo here today.. guess not. Bronte, I am sorry to hear you are not doing well. :( I am sure it is a stressful and highly emotional process. I always feel bad giving any positive updates if others are not feeling so good. Please feel free to update here tomorrow.

I'll attach a picture of the new test. Top test is yesterday, bottom was from today. Neither was using FMU. I will not test again until Thursday. AF is not due until Friday or Saturday.
 



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## BronteForever

Breaking - oh I see it on the bottom one. I really hope this sticks. Keeping my fingers crossed for you. 

And don't feel bad at all. I'm honestly so used to it by now. I've been at this for more than 7 years (not straight, but pretty much). So I honestly enjoy celebrating with others. I know it doesn't impact my journey in any way and it's nice to celebrate other's pregnancies. I do respect that it is hard for some though so that's sweet of you to be concerned.

And yes it is an incredibly emotional process doing IVF. I think merely because it's the end of the line and nothing is left after it for a biological kid. There's adoption but that has it's own unique set of issues so I really include them in two seperate lines  I'm just frustrated with a lot of my first cycle and how my care was handled that it's annoying to some extend that a lot of this is in the doctors hands and they decide my fate based on their decisions. So I've been reading IVF studies all week in prep to talk with my doctors. I'm getting super educated along the way too since I can't just trust them.


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## breakingdawn

I told my best friend tonight.. and it was really hard. She does have a son and it took her several years to have him. She really wanted one more but found out recently she has basically no eggs left. I debated on whether it would upset her more to tell her, or wait a while. I ended up telling her and I could tell it did hurt her but she seemed happy for me. They are now looking in to adoption. I am very mindful of those who have struggled much longer and harder than myself and I just don't want to flaunt anything, if that makes sense? But thank you... I am nervous for sure. Always worried about ectopic, etc. The good news is, I am seeing lines pretty early. With my ectopic I did not get any lines until AF was late. I am trying to be hopeful. I will give another test update Thursday.

Don't forget to update with your doctor appointment. I have really been rooting for you.


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## BronteForever

That must be a common diagnosis lately because I've seen about five people in the past few weeks that have been told they have a diminished reserve or high FSH. Some are moving onto IVF but that's a hard process with that diagnosis but definetly still doable. Hope they have good luck with adoption if that's the route they take. 

And I think it's harder with people in "real life" for no other reason than we are strictly focused on TTC mostly on here so that's the focus of the conversations. But friends span lots of different spots in our lives and sometimes just bringing up a positive can get a bit overwhelming hearing because you know you'll be surrounded by pregnancy for a few months which can be a bit harder to deal with in person. Doesn't mean you aren't still happy for the person at all. It is just a bit tough for everyone involved, I agree.


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## BronteForever

And yes I know it is hard not to think about another ectopic but I agree it is a good sign you are seeing lines at this point.


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## breakingdawn

Just wanted to drop by with a quick update.. I have a doctor appointment Friday morning.
 



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## BronteForever

Much more visible and seems to be increasing which is great!!

My meeting with my doctor went fine - much better experience with my actual doctor. Now let's hope he's around for the next cycle! Goal is still to wait until January to atleast try giving acupuncture, supplements and weight loss a try. Plus I need the mental break a bit. This process is not easy. Six more months of aging shouldn't hurt my chances too much. 

Still not feeling very confident but we have a much better game plan of what to change up and hopefully a slightly different protocol will get better quality eggs.


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## breakingdawn

Sounds like you have a great game plan! I'll be thinking of you for sure and hoping this cycle is a winner for you. I can't imagine how stressful it is. I won't even pretend to know. But I'm hoping for the best.

I'm nervous about my appointment but trusting whatever is meant to be will be. Still very much in shock.


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## mod19

Breaking when is your appt?

Bronte I'm sorry :( *hugs*
I know how it feels to be helpless and hopeless and downright depressed about the whole thing. I don't know it to your extent, but I do know about Dr's not listening, more surgeries than should have been needed, month after month after month of negative tests...and then when I saw a sliver of hope, it got ripped away from me again. I know the heartbreak of being built up to be hopeful to have it all ripped away. I'm so sorry you're having to go through all the heartbreak again. It does sound like you've got a great game plan though. I know you are already spending a small fortune on all of this, so if you need any supplements, please let me know. I work at a health foods store and can get most any supplement free. I promise if you need anything I will send it and not come stalk you lol. I can ship out right from work visa ups for free. Prenatals, dha/fish oil, b vitamins, progesterone...whatever you need, I can probably make it happen.


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## breakingdawn

Nice of you to offer that for her Mod. :) 

My appointment is at 10am Friday morning.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - good luck Friday!!!

Oh mod - thank you so much. It is hard to work with doctors throughout this process. I enjoyed my doctor today because he seemed to be on board with me calling the shots more and him just giving expert opinions as needed. I really felt like he listened to me and I needed that.

In terms of supplements that is super wonderful of you to offer and means so much to me. I would love to take you up on the offer and would be grateful for anything you send me. I've already ordered and started Ubiquinol (CoQ10) which is the biggest one I need I think. And I ordered Myo Inositol and melatonin. But I need to do more reading on Myo Inositol before taking. 

I was going to add in Vitamin C and Vitamin E, omega 3 fatty acid, and I'm debating on DHEA (I need to do more reading on it). 

I'm reading a book right now that talks a ton about supplements so I'm trying to finish that before getting my list ready. 

Anyway, I'd be grateful for anything you could get. Thanks so much for offering.


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## mod19

Yeah coQ10 is pricy. Just let me know when you're ready and I'll make it happen. I'll probably need about a week or so to get it all together because I have to get credit from reps for them. Definitely doable though, as long as it's something we carry on the shelves.


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## BronteForever

mod19 said:


> Yeah coQ10 is pricy. Just let me know when you're ready and I'll make it happen. I'll probably need about a week or so to get it all together because I have to get credit from reps for them. Definitely doable though, as long as it's something we carry on the shelves.

Awesome and if you have suggestions of supplements too that help with fertility, I'm all ears. I just need stuff that could possibly help egg quality. There's so little research done on it to even know which ones to try and my doctors are super vague about it - because they honestly don't know. I know CoQ10 is the one I need the most though and seems to be the biggest one recommended. I have enough to last me a few months though right now.

So if you can get:
* Omega 3 fatty acid
* Vitamin C
* Vitamin E

Those would be wonderful and a huge help. If not, it's fine and I still really appreciate the offer!


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## breakingdawn

My test seems to have gotten lighter today. I don't think this will be a viable pregnancy.


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## BronteForever

Oh Breaking, I really hope that's not true. Still keeping my fingers crossed for you. I know they say you shouldn't compare the color from day to day, since it technically takes 2 days for your HCG to go up. So let's just hope it dried a bit different and looks lighter. That is all possible.

Really keeping my fingers crossed for you!


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## breakingdawn

These are tests from Monday Tuesday Wednesday and Thursday
 



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## BronteForever

Yep, I honestly don't see much difference. I saw someone posting similar pictures awhile ago and they were also worried about the lines getting lighter, but it was a viable pregnancy and they haven't had complications.

Really keeping my fingers crossed for you. I know the first trimester it's hard not to worry about everything though. I would be the same way. Once you have a loss, there's just no way to forget about it.


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## breakingdawn

I am going to cross reference with a FRER tonight I guess. I feel nervous still though. It definitely was a little lighter in person.


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## BronteForever

Hopefully you can get some peace of mind from the doctor tomorrow after they do the blood test. Good luck!


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## breakingdawn

Here is my FRER
 



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## BronteForever

Still positive that's a good thing. Hope you get more news tomorrow!


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## breakingdawn

Thanks - trying to remain hopeful


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## breakingdawn

Not very good news today at my doctor appointment. The did a blood draw which sadly I will not receive results until Monday. However, they did a urine test also. Theirs seems to pick up at levels 25+. It was very faint. Sadly the nurse only looked at it up to about the 3 minute mark. Then threw it away. I always leave it out longer even though I know you are not suppose to. Regardless, It should be getting darker by now. Especially given the fact my first super faint positive was Monday. I am confused as my FRER looked so good yesterday but I know it detects at much lower levels. So it would seem my levels are going down, not up. I suspect I will see spotting over the weekend before I even get my results. If I don't, I will likely have to go back Monday or Tuesday for more blood work to see where we are at and if I need to be checked for an ectopic. :(


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## BronteForever

I'm so sorry breaking. You are definitely not out of it at all yet. Wish they could have given you your blood results (though it probably wouldn't have told you much until you've seen the numbers double anyway).

You are still early. Try not to lose hope, but I know that's hard to do.


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## breakingdawn

I am a little annoyed. From all the reading I have done with doctor's urine tests it seems they need at least 5 minutes to fully develop. I am pretty sure the nurse threw it in the trash at the 3 minute mark, if not sooner. I should have taken it home with me to look at later, lol. But no use in worrying. Like someone else said, worrying is not going to change what will be. Only make you feel worse in the process. I will take my other FRER tomorrow evening. If it gets darker, yay. If not, we will have our answer.


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## BronteForever

Yes, worrying will definitely not change anything! It's so hard not to think too much about it though. Really hope your numbers increase!

Was it just a standard blood test or were they doing another one to check if it doubles at a later date too?


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## breakingdawn

It is the blood test which will give exact hcg number. I'll get that number Monday morning and then probably a repeat Monday or Tuesday to see if it is progressing or going down. Assuming I have not already began spotting or started a period.


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## BronteForever

Sounds like a good plan! Really hope you get good news!


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## breakingdawn

Thank you, me too. But at least I have mostly prepared myself for the bad. Not to say it won't be upsetting. But just ready to know something at this point.


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## breakingdawn

My FRERs really are not progressing well. :( Very concerned about an ectopic at this point.
 



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## BronteForever

Really hope it's not an ectopic. It's still early. I know it's hard not to stress but try to hang in there.


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## Aayla

Breaking I found you!! I hit new posts and yours was at the top of my list. Oh how exciting you have a bfp!! I do hope you are wrong about it not progressing. I see progression in the frer pics. Have you tested again today?


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## breakingdawn

14dpo was indeed from today. I thank you ladies for the support but I saw a small bit of brown spotting when I went to the bathroom just now. I'm thinking this is probably the beginning of the end for me. :(


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## Aayla

Oh I hope not. My Fx are crossed for you.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - I'm so sorry to hear about potential spotting too. Big hugs. I hope it's all normal. I know it's becoming harder to keep the hope though. Any updates?

If it's not viable I really hope they track you well to double and triple make sure it's not another ectopic. 

So sorry you are going through this.


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## breakingdawn

No more spotting just the one time. I'll get my first blood results tomorrow morning -and I'll go do another test to compare. I'll update at some point just feeling emotionally drained. Thanks for asking and I hope you're doing okay.


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## EverythingXd

Hi ladies, just wanted to stop by and wish you loads of luck :flower:

I had an ectopic last January. Baby was attached to my ovary, so I have both tubes still but only one ovary. I had severe internal bleeding and needed 4 pints blood transfusion. I was nearly 40 at the time... then I found out I was pregnant again only 4 months later, but my hopes were crushed at the 12 week scan when I found out baby died at 8+5.

So here I am now, 41 years old and finally managed to get pregnant again. All is good so far approaching 16 weeks *touches wood*

Just wanted to say there is always hope. I got my BFP after taking Maca and COQ10 for 6 weeks so I think they helped (could be coincidence).

Breaking, I don't have experience with FRERs but there is definite progression in your 12dpo/14dpo pics. I really hope you have a sticky baby burrowing safely into your uterus :hugs:

Also thought I would say, I had spotting this pregnancy at 13 and 14dpo. Tested at 15dpo and got BFP. I'm sure I also had spotting around when AF due with at least one of my DS's. Sending you lots of sticky dust :dust:


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## breakingdawn

Hey there and welcome! Thanks so much for sharing your story and I'm sorry you had to experience all of that! I'm definitely suffering from some post traumatic stress regarding the ectopic experience. It was bad. Mostly because I felt like if people had listened to me sooner I wouldn't have almost had a near death experience. I'm glad to have this all checked very early on this time. Lots of prayers needed for this week as we get answers!


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## EverythingXd

It's so tough TTC (and being pregnant again) after an ectopic / loss, so I really do feel for you. I'm sorry they didn't listen to you, I can imagine that experience has made you even more paranoid than you would have been. I'll be reading and have all toes and fingers crossed for positive updates from you, and the other ladies TTC x


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## breakingdawn

Thank you so much and I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes really well! Feel free to keep us posted on that too. Always happy to support others.


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## EverythingXd

breakingdawn said:


> Thank you so much and I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes really well! Feel free to keep us posted on that too. Always happy to support others.

Thank you, very kind :hugs:


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## BronteForever

Breaking - that's great there hasn't been anymore spotting. Really keeping my fingers crossed for good news tomorrow and after the test results from tomorrow's test. Good luck!! It is so hard I imagine not to worry at all. But it is great you are being taken seriously now and they will check you properly from the get-go. 

Everything - huge congrats on your pregnancy and that's for sharing your story. I know ovarian ectopics can be pretty bad so I'm so glad you survived and were able to get pregnant again. So sorry for your losses along the way though!


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## EverythingXd

Thanks Bronte. Makes me shudder when I think what a lucky escape I had. I was on blood thinners at the time, but didn't realise the pain was internal bleeding and sat it out for 6 hours through the night because I didn't want to wake my family. I got a taxi to the walk-in in the end, and they gave me Morphine straight away and called an ambulance. One week post surgery and I was completely healed because it was keyhole, I felt like I wanted to still be in pain because I was still hurting so badly emotionally.

Anyway, enough of my ramblings! I just wanted to wish all of you all the luck in the world, and thought I'd best explain why I can relate because I haven't put the painful bits in my sig :flower:


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## breakingdawn

Blood level update: on Friday, around 13dpo, my levels were 56. I just did more blood work and will have those results tomorrow morning. I'm very nervous. My doctor said if they aren't rising normally I have to go back again Wednesday. If it seems to be rising normally then he said a scan in two weeks. Seems far off to me with an ectopic risk I don't know. :(


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## EverythingXd

Good luck for your results tomorrow Breaking. 

My early scan to check this pregnancy was in the right place was booked for when I was 7 weeks pregnant, which seemed crazy late! I had my ectopic at 6 weeks gestation :shrug: I actually wasn't concerned about ectopic though as I was certain I felt baby implant low down in my uterus, so I was ok with waiting so I'd see a definite heartbeat etc.


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## breakingdawn

My doctor did say my levels were low and I agree. So I'm a bit worried.


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## BronteForever

It's also possible you were maybe off a day on the dpo, so I think the real test is going to see how it's progressing. Really hope it does for you!

No sign of AF though, correct? That is good point.


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## breakingdawn

No sign of AF yet, tomorrow morning we will have a good idea of what's going to happen I think.


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## BronteForever

Yay. That's good. Really keeping the hope alive on your behalf! I will think lots and lots of positive thoughts for you.


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## breakingdawn

Thank you. I'm so exhausted from lack of sleep from worry. I hope I can sleep some tonight. At least I don't have to wait an entire weekend again for results! Just one day.


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## BronteForever

Yeah - waiting the weekend for results would have sucked. However, it means it's closer to getting the results of today's test so you can compare the two closer together!


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## mod19

Everything welcome! 

Bronte are there specific strengths you're looking for? Or just in general? I really think you should be on a prenatal as well, and make sure you're eating enough greens to add to your folate intake. At this point I don't think you'd need any extra aside from the prenatal. Don't remember if you said it or not, but I think zinc would be beneficial to you as well.

Breaking I'm praying for you that numbers are rising accordingly! 

Well I have heartbreaking news in the baby world again. My friends 3 month old daughter died from sids this past weekend. I'm at a complete loss for words. My coworker lost her preterm grandbaby, Bronte and one of my friends had heartbreaking ivf cycles (she got pregnant, but lost the baby), and now this. I can't even imagine. I feel like I'm bad luck and need to step away from all of this. I get so focused on what I went through, how many babies I SHOULD have, but I'm so grateful (again!) That I've not had to meet, hold and bond with my baby for 3 months just to bury her. I didnt even know what to say to her. :(


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## BronteForever

Oh Mod, how incredible sad. So sorry for your friend's loss. I just can't even imagine that either. I would have no idea what to say to her either. Just an incredibly sad loss. One of my friends lost a child to SIDS at 3 months as well, but it was 14 years ago before I even knew her and when I found out, I still had no idea what to say to her. It's just incredibly hard. She did say it was so hard for her to bond with her second child when she did have him, because she was so worried the first year after losing her first.

It does put things in perspective and make you appreciate what you do have.

Hugs.


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## BronteForever

I'm not sure on supplements. I'm so bad at this stuff. But I do take a prenatal multivitamin already and have been for probably 3 years or so. It does have some Vitamin C (100 mg) and Vitamin E (11 IU) in it. As well as Zinc (25 mg) However, my doctor suggested:

* Omega 3 fatty acid - 1000 mg daily
* Vitamin C - 500 mg daily
* Vitamin E - 200 IU daily

So I don't think the extra will hurt. Extra Zinc probably couldn't hurt either. I have to take a bonus Vitamin D3 (5000 IU) already as well, because my levels are insanely low without it. My regular doctor makes me do that.


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## breakingdawn

Mod, I am very sorry to hear about your friend. I will be keeping them in my prayers. I also have friends going through a rough time too and it does put things in perspective. No matter the outcome of my pregnancy right now if I come away healthy and still have my two healthy living children, that is all that really matters in the end.


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## breakingdawn

I am afraid it is bad news for my ladies, my levels only reached 83 and I am now at high risk for an ectopic pregnancy again. 5 years to the date from my last one.


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## mod19

I'm so sorry breaking :(


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## BronteForever

Breaking - I'm so very sorry to hear this. Huge hugs being sent your way!


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## EverythingXd

Breaking, I'm so sorry to hear that :cry: I hope this was not ectopic but if it was at least it is early so you should be spared from any kind of rupture. Stay strong :hugs:

Mod, your friend must be devastated. I just have no idea how I would cope :cry:


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## breakingdawn

In theory, I got the best case scenario news this morning. If you can call it that. My levels dropped from 83 to 60. The HOPE now.. is this is just a normal m/c and it is going to resolve very soon on its own. I have to keep doing repeat blood work though to make sure it does not go back up which will suggest an ectopic. The hope is the numbers get down to 0 soon and this will all be done. If this happens, that means my left tube is potentially still good. However what caused the m/c is unknown and worrisome. Could point to other issues now, age, something else going on.. etc.


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## BronteForever

Well yes that is some promising news, but this all still sucks. So sorry you are having to go through this, but I'm happy they are monitoring you so well to make sure you will be fine physically.


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## breakingdawn

It sucks. I am angry and sad and frustrated but most of all tired. I just want to get it all done and over with. Not sure we will try again after this.


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## EverythingXd

It's all too raw for you to decide whether you want to try again or not yet. Give yourself some time and you may start to feel differently :hugs: xx


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## BronteForever

I can't blame you. I'm so sorry. I wish it was easier. I had to take a really long break after my ectopic because I just mentally wasn't ready to try again. It's hard to process all of this.


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## mod19

Bronte if you can send me your information I can get you some stuff out today. I'm having an issue getting an E, so that might not be in the box


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## BronteForever

Breaking - hope you are alright hon. Hugs.


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## mod19

How's everyone doing? 

Things with dh and I have improved 10 fold and we decided yesterday that we are back on the baby making train. Next cycle we will start trying again. My Dr moved practices so I'm trying to get into her new one, but the scheduling department won't call me back, which is super frustrating for a fresh start :/


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## BronteForever

Oh Mod, so pleased to hear everything has calmed down and improved. I'm excited for you to start TTC again. Good luck. Hope you can get stuff scheduled soon.

Breaking - really hope you are doing alright. Hugs.

AFM - just hanging out and trying to get healthier. Doing acupuncture, taking supplements (thanks again Mod!!!), and trying to lose weight. I guess I'm TTC still and am entering fertile time this week. But not really holding any hope on that.


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## mod19

Hey aside from the progesterone cream that I mentioned to you, take evening primrose oil! It helps with everything female lol. Seriously it's good for balancing hormones, easing cramps, cm...also a good probiotic will help you produce more cm so that your "area" isn't so hostile to the swimmers. 

Also! (Sorry, didn't realize you were still trying on your own), make sure your dh is taking folate and zinc! It helps his swimmers!


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## BronteForever

Thanks for the suggestions. I do take a probiotic daily but didn't realize it helps with CM. But I do normally have plenty of it  I'll look into the primrose oil. 

I don't know if I'd classify us as really TTC maybe we are TTC - lite  we obviously aren't preventing but not stressing about getting stuff in at certain times and just trying to get close. You never know acupuncture might clear up my scar tissue. It's not likely but weirder things have happened. 

Good luck!!


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## breakingdawn

Bronte - I am still alive. I am doing okay. Just taking a break from baby groups and such. I did not want anyone to worry so I just wanted to briefly pop in and say hello.


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## BronteForever

I don't blame you for taking a break at all. Glad you are doing alright physically at least!


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## breakingdawn

I am okay mentally and physically. I bounced back pretty quick. I mean I am still sad and disappointed, but all things considered it was a VERY quick miscarriage. My levels dropped back to 0 in less than a week and I had what was almost a very normal "period".. no pain, nothing. Now at CD15 I am ovulating again. I got a super dark positive on an OPK today. It is crazy how quickly my body bounced back. We are still TTC at this time.. I am just not involving myself too deeply in the groups and such. Just puts too much pressure on me. :( But I do like to check in here and see how everyone is doing.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - so glad to see your body has recovered so quickly and you are still TTC. I really hope you get a sticky bean soon.


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## breakingdawn

Thank you.. I really hope our next one sticks around. A piece of my heart definitely is missing.


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## BronteForever

I know. Hugs hon. Miscarriages and ectopics suck.


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## breakingdawn

Nothing doing here ladies. :bfn: at 8/9DPO. Always gotten my positives by this point. But I am okay. How is everyone else?


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## mod19

Glad you're ok with it breaking. Are you emotionally doing better?

Bronte how is acupuncture going? I looked into it before, but like you said, they say to allow 3 months before seeing results, but it's so expensive. I completely understand why you are doing ithe, but couldn't justify it for myself.

I had my Dr appt on Friday (finally!) And she did write me a script for Clomid. She said we can try this again or she can send me directly to infertility, which I'may not sure I'll ever do. If this doesn't work, I'm not sure I'll pursue it much further seeing as I already have 1 child. I'm not even half way through this cycle, so it'll be a little bit before I get to start it, but fingers crossed.


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## BronteForever

Breaking - sorry about the negative but I'm pleased you are trying and really hope you get positive news. 

Mod - Clomid is what helped you get your daughter, correct? I really hope it helps and that's all you need. Good luck. 

Acupuncture is going really well for the most part. I've definetly noticed improved sleep and help with other issues. Now I have no clue if it's helping with egg quality but even though it's expensive it's actually a super small expense to everything else we are paying for with IVF so if it helps my next cycle then it's worth it since this last one was a bust. 

I've stalled on my weight loss so I need to figure out what to change up.


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## breakingdawn

I hope everyone is doing okay. I took a long break from bnb. Sad to see no updates... but I hope this post finds everyone well. I am 9DPO today and have another light pregnancy test. I am not getting my hopes up after what happened in August but I could definitely use some prayers. Thanks ladies... hope you all are doing okay.
 



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## BronteForever

Oh breaking. I'm sending you all the positive thoughts. Really hope this sticks. Good luck!!


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## mod19

Breaking think positive until proven otherwise! Congrats!!!

I'm on my first round of 50mg of clomid. Had a day 14 ultrasound that showed no dominate follicles, and the bigger ones were on my right side, which has no tube. So once af gets here the will call in a new script for me for 100mg days 3-7.


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## BronteForever

Mod that's wonderful you are starting Clomid as well. Hope it helps you ovulate from both sides next month. Or the tube can catch it from the other side!!

I don't really have much going on and to be honest I'm not really hopeful for our next IVF cycle. We will see what happens, but I'm trying to come to terms with the fact we might not have a child and I go through days when I'm fine with that and others when I'm not. Regardless, I'm just ready to move on after the next cycle. I need a break.


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## breakingdawn

Mod, that is great! Clomid was extremely helpful for a good friend who tried for years to get pregnant with no success. I hope it is helpful for you as well. Please keep us posted if you can.

Bronte, you will remain in my thoughts and prayers. I hope the next IVF cycle proves you wrong and you are successful. But I know it is hard to stay hopeful all the time. I really hope it works out for you.. for both of you ladies.

Thank you for the support. I am not getting overly hopeful but I will say my test started out much stronger this month than it did back in August. But I know many women have completely normal HCG levels and still m/c so I am not going to get overly excited. At this point I am just cautiously optimistic. I do have a doctor appointment on Friday for bloodwork. AF isn't even due until Saturday or Sunday, so.. still very early.


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## mod19

Well Bronte, one of my friends posted something about the ring test on facebook. Supposedly it tells you how many children you'll have and what genders. (Breaking do this too cuz I'm curious!) You get a necklace that has a pendant or ring on it. Hold it with your right grasp. Hold your left hand out, palm up. Take the necklace and "dip" it in the space between your left thumb and pointer 3 times, then move it over your palm and it will start to move (if you're going to have kids). It will move, slow down, and repeat for each child. When it's done, it stops. Circles mean girl and back and forth means boy. I've done this at least 20 times and each time mine says girl boy. Friends on Facebook that tried said there's was accurate....so now I'm so curious!!! Hopefully this can give you some sort of hope bronte.


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## breakingdawn

Well I did cave and do another test today..... today is 10DPO
 



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## BronteForever

Yay for stronger lines.

Mod - I'm not sure if I did the test correctly, but it said I'd have like a million kids because it never stopped swaying or circling. So who knows.


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## mod19

Breaking that's a promising sigh! Eek!

Bronte lol that's so crazy. Maybe next time you'll transfer 8 embys and all 8 will implant lol. It clearly stops for me. We're you holding your hand really still? Plus it's just silly nonsense, lol


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## breakingdawn

Well at first my cheapie test looked lighter today than yesterday. So I did one this evening instead, 11DPO...
 



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## BronteForever

Wow that's a strong line. But try to resist the tests! Did you get a beta scheduled?


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## breakingdawn

I am doing my Beta Monday. We decided tomorrow is early since I am only 12DPO tomorrow. On Monday I will be 15DPO.


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## BronteForever

Coming up quickly. Yay!


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## breakingdawn

Hoping for a very uneventful weekend and the strength to not test anymore. Ugh...


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## breakingdawn

So, the strength failed me. I did test today at 12DPO and it is definitely darker. Maybe this can put my mind at ease through the weekend. Definitely no where near out of the woods until I get confirmation where it implanted but for now, baby. <3
 



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## BronteForever

Yay!!!!


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## mod19

Yay!!!


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## breakingdawn

Alright ladies, I am done testing as of today. Just going to see what the blood test results do next week. Keep the prayers coming!
 



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## BronteForever

Definetly thinking about you. Good luck and hope your betas progress this week!


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## breakingdawn

Thanks so much. I have not seen tests like this since my second daughter so, hoping it is a good sign. I know better than to get too excited though but for now, I am pregnant. Until proven otherwise.


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## BronteForever

You are definetly pregnant. No proving necessary. Just hope it sticks!


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## breakingdawn

Me too


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## justmeinlove

Hi, can i join in?
I'' not 100% sure yet on ttc but i had a ruptured ectopic on 9 September (after finding out i was surprisingly pregnant on 8 September). So as you can imagine, that's been quite traumatising.

I'm finding it hard to know if I want to risk another go for a few reasons. i'm 39 and our little girl is 3 1/2 so I feel strongly that i'm running (have run?) out of time.
I also have an underactive thyroid. Whilst my Dr thinks the control is ok, it's too high for what I understand to be ok when ttc (and is setting off Lots of distressed thoughts that it might have caused the ectopic) :( Getting it down to a better level of course takes even More time. And it's making me feel like maybe we just shouldn't try - all the possible risks scare me and apparently there are possible implications for a baby as well :'(

But I do find the thought of not really hard - I feel terrible for my little girl. I hated being an only child and always said I would have two, for that exact reason.

Apologies, I seem to be veering into the tearful post ectopic phase :(


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## breakingdawn

Hi justme and welcome. I know very well what you are feeling and going through right now. My ectopic experience was one of the hardest times of my life. I will say off the bat though, 39 is not considered "too old" now.. for pregnancy. My doctor recently delivered a woman's baby who was in her 50's. Not saying that is ideal, but.. 39 is still very much okay! I have a friend who had thyroid issues too which hindered her getting pregnant but once she got it under control with medicine, and the help of clomid, she did get pregnant after trying for two years. She was in her mid 30's at the time! You just need to decide what is right for you and how much you want it but it is certainly possible and you should not give up hope!


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## breakingdawn

I got my results today and I am freaking out a little!!!

521 HCG
17.5 progesterone

Is it just me or is this really high for only 4 weeks and a day or two????


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## breakingdawn

My doctor said there was *some* concern about the high numbers but I checked my old levels with DD#2 and it is pretty close to where they are now.
12 DPO: 89
14 DPO: 276
17 DPO: 1,041

I was either 15/16 DPO on Monday with 521. So, I am going to relax until told otherwise.


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## BronteForever

Congrats Breaking. I don't think it's too high. They say higher ones are often girls though 

Justme - you are more than welcome to join us. Though I'm so sorry you have had to and for your loss. Big hugs. My ectopic was also one of the most challenging times of my life as well and it's a pretty traumatic experience to go through. Feel free to share or talk about anything you need to. Holding it in makes it worse.


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## breakingdawn

Thanks! Keeping the faith.


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## Dtrisha

Hey ladies. Haven't been on here in a long time. Took a break and just came back to give a update. We're currently almost 14 weeks pregnant :). Was very nervous in the beginning and now I feel like I can relax a bit. Had a checkup Monday at 13 weeks and heard the heartbeat so we're past the "scary" zone of miscarriage. I was pretty sick for about a month then it went away thankfully because I ended up losing about 8 pounds. But getting pregnant after your EP is definitely doable. It took us 7 months but here we are. Thanking everyone here and in my life for support.


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## BronteForever

Congrats Dtrisha - that's wonderful news. Thanks so much for stopping back in to update us. I'm thrilled for you! Yes, getting pregnant after an ectopic is doable. I'm about to hit 8 years after mine, so I'm really hoping to join the club sometime soon!


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## mod19

Welcome justme! Feel free to veer and vent and cry as much as you wish. (I do it too hehe). I'm sorry about your ectopic, and it does suck. There are ways to control thyroid issues and 39 is certainly not too old. Just have a talk with your dr. And do not blame yourself on your ectopic. No amount of stress can cause it. It's just something that happens. Think of it as the sperm getting a little too anxious ;)

Dtrish congrats! So glad you're over that first hump and can relax!

Breaking those numbers are higher than mine with dd, but you also could have implanted early. I really wouldn't worry too much on that. Yay for you!

Bronte how are things going with you?

Afm, this is my first "clomid period". Holy crap is it bad! Tons of cramps and super heavy, but it seems most of the cramping has died down. It's day 1 for me and my Dr called in the higher dosage so I'll be starting that on Saturday. I really didn't want birthdays too close together, so I'm definitely ok with af showing up. Plus the higher dosage and most of my dominate follicles being on my right side last month puts me in a higher favor for more follicles on my left side. Fingers crossed!


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## Dtrisha

Thanks ladies ! I really hope you can too bronte forever. That's far to long for sure.


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## BronteForever

Thanks Dtrisha - it is. Granted some of that was a self-sustained break. It's just getting tiring regardless. Anyway, hope it happens with the next IVF but I'm ready to move on regardless. 

Mod - your period sounds aweful. So sorry. Really hope the next cycle is it for you!

Breaking - any updates?

AFM - I'm not doing great mentally still. Just ready to be done with this process and get the next IVF started. However, I think my supplements and acupuncture are doing something, because this was the first period in years where I didn't spot 2-7 days of brown blood continuously before my period started. So I'm thinking something must be working better in there...hopefully!


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## breakingdawn

Big congrats to you Dtrisha. :D

Mod -- my friend said her periods were really unpleasant on clomid too. :( But she did conceive using it! 

Bronte -- I am sorry you are not doing well mentally but I can't say I blame you. I am sure IVF is a stressful and nerve wracking process. I really hope the next cycle is your magic one. That sounds really promising about your period though!!

I am doing okay. Just really really tired. I am taking that as a good sign. I am starting to have a few symptoms but nothing major. I do have a lot of back pain which scares me and some cramping off and on. No spotting or anything yet. Just holding out for Monday where I do another blood test. I am terrified for the results on Tuesday though. I am so scared the numbers will have gone down or not doubled as they should. In theory I should be well over 5,000 by then. But worrying is not going to change anything so I am trying hard just to keep my mind off it. Keep the prayers coming. <3


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## BronteForever

Breaking - you sound much more calm and relaxed with this pregnancy. I think it's the one. Good luck!


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## breakingdawn

I'm doing better. :) Definitely not as high strung! That was helping no one. Haha


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## mod19

Bronte I'm so sorry you're struggling. You need to find your happy place. Ttc has taught me that you need to stay positive, even with all the negatives that can occur. For example, when I called the dr to get the new prescription my nurse was so apologetic, even after I assured her it was fine. Her response? "I see miracles happen everyday, we always hold out hope for all of our patients." I wish there was something I could do for you :(

Breaking how are things progressing? Are you scheduled for an ultrasound yet?


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## breakingdawn

I got more HCG blood work today and I get my results tomorrow. However, this evening I noticed some light pink spotting. :( I am very concerned because this is when I had spotting with my ectopic, right at 5 weeks. Just not feeling very hopeful at this time so prayers are appreciated. Will update when I can.


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## BronteForever

Definetly sending prayers and positive thoughts. Really hope the spotting is just normal.


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## mod19

I'm sorry breaking :hugs:
Hopefully everything is fine and it's just bub getting comfey in there.


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## breakingdawn

Update: I went in this morning for an "emergency" appointment. They did a urine sample which did show I may have a mild UTI so I got medicine for that. I found out my new HCG numbers were at 6,800 something. So that was good. He did an exam and did not see any signs of active bleeding but could see the light spotty stuff. They went ahead and sent me to ultrasound to be sure this was not an ectopic. We did see a baby in my uterus, measuring about 5w and 6d. We also saw a flicker for the heartbeat! Thanks for thinking of me. Hopefully the spotting goes away!
 



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## BronteForever

Yay for all this! Hopefully the spotting goes away and was all just normal.


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## breakingdawn

I hope so too. Going to just get a lot of rest and take the medicine for the UTI and hope it helps.


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## mod19

Ahhh so glad you got to see (hear?) The heartbeat! So exciting!


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## breakingdawn

Too soon to hear it but we could see it. Just a tiny little flicker. Honestly, they seemed a little surprised to see it. My chart had me at just like 5 weeks and a couple days but based on the ultrasound they said it was more like 5 weeks and 6 days.


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## mod19

How is everyone doing? Breaking I hope everything is going well.


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## CanadianMoose

Howdy ladies I'm waaay late to this party but I thought I'd introduce myself.
-one tube, had left ovary/Fallopian tube removed at age 15 due to entanglement and cyst (horrible pain and grew to the size of a melon pushing all my organs out of the way)
-ectopic pregnancy at age 22 (was in the uterus but half of the baby was in the opening of the tube, no heartbeat so was given misoprostol and it flushed itself out before taking the other pill)
- have had 2 other positives but then MCs (recent being last month at 5 weeks) and now trying again this month

Thinking on top of having one tube and ovary I might have low progesterone levels due to this. Anyone have any information on this? Just finished my AF and now waiting for O and trying to eat Progesterone boosting food and stay active and healthy. Lovely to meet ladies like myself, and hope that everything goes well for breakingdawn and the rest of ya'll get your lovely babes soon. :D


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## breakingdawn

Hey there and welcome. I'm pretty clueless on progesterone but I know it's something that can easily be tested for and their are some types of creams you can buy in store or medication you can be prescribed if it's found to be an issue. Good luck to you. :)

I'm doing okay. Still pregnant as far as I know. I have a 7 week visit on the 8th and I'll probably get another ultrasound to check the status. I feel pretty tired and sick most of the time now. I hope everyone else is doing okay.


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## CanadianMoose

Yes I'd rather use natural methods because medication can react very differently with my body and I'm seen as "sensitive." so instead of using creams and possibly having a allergic reaction I want to try boosting through foods and such. I hope everything goes well in your ultrasound and you see a healthy growing bud. Just starting my O wait and honestly I can't wait to get back to spend that time with my hubby. I've missed the sexy times with him and being close.


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## mod19

Breaking tired is a good sign. So fingers crossed! Time seems to go by so slow when you're waiting to get out of that "danger" zone.

Welcome moose. You can get your progesterone tested if you're concerned about that, but aside from that there's really no way to tell. Creams are pretty natural and I've used it myself, the only drawback is that you HAVE to use it everyday for at least 12 weeks if you should become pregnant on it.


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## robo123

can I join? I have just found out I am pregnant, currently 11DPO. I had an Ectopic last march and now I am worried about every twinge I feel. Lines seem ok, I have also had 6 early losses. is It normal to have twinges where my last ectopic was, luckily they managed to save my tube


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## CanadianMoose

Omgosh, yay science! saving the tubes! that's awesome hun I'm happy for you and FX for a healthy and good pregnancy. Hoping it's your Rainbow baby!


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## robo123

Medicine is an amazing thing, thank you so much for replying. It's scary when you worry about every pain twinges xx


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## breakingdawn

It's normal to feel twinges from the side you probably ovulated from. I had the same issue but because I also had spotting I had an early ultrasound at 5+ weeks to confirm location. I think early ultrasounds are essential to ectopic survivors because tubes can rupture as early as 5-6 weeks sometimes. Best of luck to you!


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## mod19

Co grass robo. Are you scheduled for an early ultrasound yet? Did they cut open the tube where the ectopic was, or did you get the medicine to flush everything out? They "saved" mine the first time, but it ultimately led to my second ectopic :(. Not trying to scare you, but I'm a firm believer taking out the problem tube if surgery was necessary to remove the pregnancy.


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## robo123

I had 2 lots of methotrexate, I had no pain just spotting with my ectopic, I was bliss fully unaware. I am only 3 weeks 5 days and have not missed my period so have not called my doctor or specialist yet. I do worry about another ectopic. My right tube is blocked and if they had removed my left IVF would have been my only option so we opted for methotrexate xx


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## robo123

Thank you breaking dawn, I have a dull ache on and off in the left side of my back not front. It worries me but at this stage could they confirm the location?


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## mod19

Ok that's good then. No scar tissue which was my issue. I hope everything works out well for you and you end up with a perfect little bundle in your arms


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## breakingdawn

The good news is MOST ectopic pain actually does not come on until your tube ruptures, which is much later than 3 weeks. I had no pain with my ectopic until it ruptured around the 8 week mark. If you do have an ectopic, chances are fairly high you would not feel it yet. You do get pains from your ovary that has the corpus luteum cyst (which is what puts out your progesterone to sustain pregnancy). It is very possible that is what you are feeling. I had a lot of one sided pain around 4 weeks and there is nothing in my tube. I will be hoping for good news for you. Ideally you won't see the location until your HCG is 1,000-2,000.. when I had my scan at 5 weeks my HCG was around 9,000+ and it was very visible with the heartbeat. They dated me at 5w, 6d.


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## robo123

Thank you so much xx


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## BronteForever

CanadianMoose - welcome to the group. So sorry for your losses. I strongly discourage people from self diagnosing. We are normally wrong. I think taking foods are fine but if you would start doing anything else you really need to get checked out. Have they not examined you because of recurrent pregnancy loss? Progesterone is super easy to have tested.


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## BronteForever

Robo - congrats on the pregnancy. When are you scheduled for blood tests or an ultrasounds? You should be seen soon just as a precaution given your history. Hopefully everything is okay. You could be having normal pains and twinges. Good luck.


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## CanadianMoose

BronteForever said:


> CanadianMoose - welcome to the group. So sorry for your losses. I strongly discourage people from self diagnosing. We are normally wrong. I think taking foods are fine but if you would start doing anything else you really need to get checked out. Have they not examined you because of recurrent pregnancy loss? Progesterone is super easy to have tested.

No not because of that I haven't gotten my medicare yet because I'm in the immigration process (american married Canadian.) When we do get some kind of coverage for me I think that's when I'll go see them about it.


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## breakingdawn

Just thought I would drop a quick update. Had my 7 week visit on Tuesday and they did do another ultrasound. Everything was fine. Baby's heart rate was around 144 which they said was good for the gestation thus far. I have another visit scheduled for week 10. Hope everyone is doing wel!
 



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## CanadianMoose

breakingdawn said:


> Just thought I would drop a quick update. Had my 7 week visit on Tuesday and they did do another ultrasound. Everything was fine. Baby's heart rate was around 144 which they said was good for the gestation thus far. I have another visit scheduled for week 10. Hope everyone is doing well!

WOOHOO!!! go Breaking! MAKE THAT BABEH GROW! hehe I'm okish here the electric company turned off the power today due to a payment mix up so it's be stressful as the beginning of my O cycles. Oh well.


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## c.m.c

Hi ladies!

I haven't posted on this forum in a very long time. 

Currently I'm 9 weeks pregnant, pregnancy number 4 and baby number 3. 
My second pregnancy was an ectopic (heterotopic). 

I got pregnant 6 weeks after my salpingectomy in 2013

I had a Tv scan scan at 6 weeks and this baby has came from my left side as the corpus cyst was on the left which is my tubeless side. I too was worried about scar tissue as I had a difficult surgery and almost lost my ovary 

Just hoping I can show you ladies that it really only takes one egg one tube and one swimmer to make a baby and our bodies can work miracles 

Both pregnancies since my salpingectomy I have been absolutely terrified of it happening again. Totally and utterly scared, I know you ladies can u dersrand.


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## mod19

Breaking yay! So excited for you!

Cmc happy for you as well! 

Finally some good news is starting to come to this thread.


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## robo123

I have had betas 15dpo was 141 17dpo was 367. I'm currently 18DPO. With my ectopic I had brown discharge at 22dpo but no betas previous to that. Little nervous and will have a scan sometime next week

Breaking that's awesome news baby looks great xx


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## CanadianMoose

Alright ladies, I need a bit of advice. 

Yesterday I had pain near my ovary while we were shopping and it was a dull strong ache/pressure cramping. I had to go home and take a hot shower to get my body to stop hurting. Later that night we BD'ed and later found out I bled a bit. I have no idea if it was "ovulation spotting" or something else but been cramping randomly now in the cold and have had to use my heat pad. Thoughts? I'm suppose to be O'ing this weekend but we were thinking cause of the MC I might be a bit late but know I don't know what to think!


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## c.m.c

Robo123 your betas look great. My first beta was 67... then went to 147 now I'm 9 weeks. 

At 6 weeks ...30 days post my O my betas were 43,000!!

Canadianmoose I always get severe O pain just how u described. Did you OPK?


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## CanadianMoose

c.m.c said:


> Canadianmoose I always get severe O pain just how u described. Did you OPK?

No unfortunately, and the Hubby refused to BD anymore after that. Even though I said I was fine there was no pain and that it was normal. I think it's cause he found out it would be a "Potent Ovulation." We read up on it and I told him about what I found and no he doesn't want to do anything and is keeping his distance from me.


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## Nazz4

Thankful for this thread! I had an ectopic turned abdominal in 2013, my tube was fixed thankfully. I got my daughter a few months later. She is 2 now. Anyways today I'm a few days late for period no cramping or anything... There was some pink when I wiped earlier but that is all I've had. Hpts are all negative. Think it could be another ectopic? With mine I got positive tests but did anyone get negative tests?? I can't figure out what is going on.


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## EverythingXd

CanadianMoose said:


> No unfortunately, and the Hubby refused to BD anymore after that. Even though I said I was fine there was no pain and that it was normal. I think it's cause he found out it would be a "Potent Ovulation." We read up on it and I told him about what I found and no he doesn't want to do anything and is keeping his distance from me.

I've not heard of 'potent ovulation' before but surely that would be a good thing if you are TTC? Is your OH not fully on board, or put off by TTC talk?

Nazz, I just replied to your post in another thread but didn't answer about whether anyone had a negative test. I didn't test at all with my ectopic because I had a full, heavy AF when I expected it so assumed I was out. I had no other pain or bleeding until 2 weeks later when I was expecting to O but instead my ovary ruptured from the ectopic. When I was at hospital they tested and my hcg was in the thousands, but I don't know how quickly it rose so when a HPT would've been positive.


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## CanadianMoose

We talked it out and he was more worried about my health and safety, to him blood while doing something like that means something wrong. It took him a good talk and some searching webMD for him to know it's normal and it wouldn't do any harm.

I was suppose to have my AF today and right in the early afternoon I had bit of blood and spotting so I thought she came. But it's now cleared off and I have no cramps or blood or anything. I all have is emotional fits of crying and irritation. I have no idea what's going on with me right now...


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## EverythingXd

Canadian, the month I got my BFP I had a little bleed on 14dpo which went away. Tested + 15dpo am. Previous months it was typical for me to have spotting 11/12dpo then start AF 13dpo. 

Bleeding is common in pregnancy around the time AF is due. Fingers crossed this is what your bleed was, and not pre-AF spotting. It doesn't sound like pre-AF spotting is usual for you?


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## CanadianMoose

EverythingXd said:


> Canadian, the month I got my BFP I had a little bleed on 14dpo which went away. Tested + 15dpo am. Previous months it was typical for me to have spotting 11/12dpo then start AF 13dpo.
> 
> Bleeding is common in pregnancy around the time AF is due. Fingers crossed this is what your bleed was, and not pre-AF spotting. It doesn't sound like pre-AF spotting is usual for you?

well it can be but usually in like a 4-12 hour window it starts up and it's ALWAYS strong the first two days. it's almost 2 days past when it started and it's no where near like a regular or "mild" period.
I have no fupping clue what's going on.


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## EverythingXd

CanadianMoose said:


> well it can be but usually in like a 4-12 hour window it starts up and it's ALWAYS strong the first two days. it's almost 2 days past when it started and it's no where near like a regular or "mild" period.
> I have no fupping clue what's going on.

Have you tested? x


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## CanadianMoose

Was going to test Saturday but she finally showed after a few days of spoting. It's now almost over and I can try again for this month. Hoping for a Christmas BFP, that would be a wonderful gift for me at least.


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## breakingdawn

Hi ladies.. just popping in to say hello and that I hope everyone is doing well. I'm close to 11 weeks now and did a ton of blood work on Tuesday including the harmony DNA test to rule out any potential genetic problems. This test will also reveal baby's gender which is exciting. I should have all the results next week.


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## mod19

Breaking that's awesome! I'm excited for the news. Are you guys leaning a particular way?


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## breakingdawn

I've always been wrong about my gender guesses lol. I've had one dream and it was girl. Usually my dreams end up being opposite so we will see.


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## mod19

Breaking have you gotten your results back yet? Is everything looking good?


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## breakingdawn

Hey there.. we did get the results back. Today I have my NT scan also. Everything came back low risk for genetic issues on the harmony test. I'll post a photo later today of my girls finding out they were having a sibling annnnnd the gender. :)


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## BronteForever

Ooh, can't wait to find out the gender. So excited. I've been so busy and haven't had much time to post on here but I'm gearing up for another IVF round in January. Starting probably early January because I'm doing a different protocol and will down-regulate before I take stimulation meds this time. 

Anyway I'm excited. How are you Mod? Hope all the new ladies that have joined are doing well too. I need to catch up on your stories.


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## CanadianMoose

Hey girls, been busy BDing and dealing with the snow I haven't had a chance to get on. But I think I'm in the TWW now if I haven't O'ed late. Not having much hope for it even though we BDed pretty much every day, but with my track record I'm just gonna expect it didn't happen and just enjoy whatever time I have to NTNP now. Also, spent all morning shoveling snow and stressed something down in that area, so I have the feeling is I had it I lost it. I think for the next few cycles I'm not going to try and just enjoy the BDing whenever we feel like it. Hope you all get your BFPs for Christmas and enjoy the festivities and holidays.


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## justmeinlove

Does anyone else find it really hard to believe that subsequent pregnancies post ectopic will go well?

As well as post ectopic I am trying to get an underactive thyroid controlled - and I think the combination makes me frel very pessimistic about ttc being a good idea.

And that's aside from the usual bad bedtime induced doubts, which I imagine are normal?


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## BronteForever

CanadianMoose - good luck in the TWW.

Justme - absolutely!!! I'm 7 years past my ectopic personally so I would actually be shocked if I can get pregnant at all. But after almost any loss, it's extremely challenging to be optimistic and everyone of my friends on here that have gotten pregnant again have really struggled the entire pregnancy with it. Pregnancies will never be the same, I'm afraid. 

So sorry you are feeling this way too. It truly does suck. I really hope you can get your thyroid under control. That should help a lot.


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## BronteForever

Mod - how are things going with you? I need an update!


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## justmeinlove

Thank you Bronteforever. Hugs for you.


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## crazylilth1ng

justmeinlove said:


> Does anyone else find it really hard to believe that subsequent pregnancies post ectopic will go well?

For me personally, I have conceived easily 4 times since my ectopic. 1 daughter, 2 chemicals and my current pregnancy. At first I worried that things would be difficult but for me they haven't been. I do feel for the ladies here who are struggling though. I lost a tube and strangely enough, the corpus luteum this time was seem on the side with no tube, so the egg made it into the opposite tube and was fertilised there. Good luck.


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## mod19

Justme yes! I actually had a second ectopic after my first, but it's because they tried to save my tube and there was too much scar tissue for the egg to get through. But I did end up with an amazing dd. Fears were not laid to rest until I had her in my arms.

Bronte I just started my 4th and final round of Clomid. It's been hard to get dh off the couch away from his basketball games so I'm sure that's played a big role. Dr said if we don't conceive this cycle she's sending me on to a fs, but I'm not going to do that. If this doesn't work then I'll just let nature take its course, unless what this other dr wants to do will be covered by insurance, which I'm sure it won't. 

Are you so excited (and nervous)? So close to starting!


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## breakingdawn

Sorry for the delay ladies!

My NT scan last week went well. Still considered low risk for any genetic defects.

I've attached a couple photos. ;) This was when my girls found out they were even having a sibling soon as well as the gender at the same time. My husband also did not know the gender until the cake reveal.
 



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## BronteForever

Breaking - yay for another girl. Love this photo of your girls. Thanks for sharing. Hope you are all excited about it. Congrats. 

Mod - well that sucks it's the last round on Clomid. Is there a reason they stop at 4 cycles? I thought you could go a bit longer. I hear you on the challenge of finding time too. Plus BD is not fun after it becomes routine. Yawn. I know you don't want to do anything at a fertility specialist. I don't blame you. None of my stuff has been covered either and I think it's such a shame. It makes me so irritated that more of this isn't standard coverage. 

Good luck with whatever you decide and hope this cycle is the lucky one so you don't need to think about what to do next. 

I am nervous and excited. I have a SIS test this Wednesday and should start one of the meds about 2 weeks later. I'm honestly not hopeful given my last round and how poorly I responded. 

But I'm hoping all my supplements and change of protocol will at least get me one embryo we can transfer so we can have a shot. I think it will be worse if we can't even make it to that stage again. 

I'm fine no matter what happens though. I think I've made peace with it. I'm just ready to move on. If it fails I want to take probably several months off and then start applying at adoption agencies. I'll need the break though. 

If it works, I'll be incredibly shocked at this point. I'm honestly not expecting it and don't think it will happen. I think I missed my window of opportunity right after my ectopic and before all my scar tissue messed up my entire body.


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## breakingdawn

Bronte I think you have hope. Many people with scar tissue from ectopic are successful. I'm still hopeful for you.

The idea of 3 girls is scary but I love girls and wasn't upset. My husband was a little disappointed of course. We definitely won't be having any more..


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## BronteForever

I know they are successful Breaking, but I haven't been one of them for the past seven years so clearly there's more damage. I know I'm pretty much out for conceiving naturally and I had alot of hope during the last IVF because of that and thinking it was only my tube that needed to be bypassed, but I did not have good results last time. It's rare not to get any embryos to transfer at all during an IVF cycle. I think the damage from scar tissue from the ectopic combined with my age is definitely not in my favor. If I could afford to keep trying multiple cycles I might have luck, but after almost $30,000 spent I can't justify another attempt after this one.

Sorry your husband was slightly disappointed. I had thought you said he wanted a boy.


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## breakingdawn

He did want a boy. But he's coming around. I'll be thinking of you and I hope your last try is successful. &#10084;&#65039;


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## deedee2015

breakingdawn said:


> Hi everyone! It has been a long time since I have been in this forum. Although my loss has not been recent, it was devastating. I have a journal if anyone else shares a similar story and would like to read it. In short, I had an ectopic pregnancy in September of 2011. I almost died and did lose my right tube in the process. By a miracle I did get pregnant a month later with a healthy girl who is now going on 4 years old! I have another daughter who is going on 8. We decided to give it one last go for a boy (but a healthy baby would be fine too). I am concerned because I am older now, do have one tube, and there is always the risk of another ectopic. I posted in the one tubers forum but seems it is not very active anymore. I just wanted to say hello to anyone else out there who has experienced an ectopic, losing a tube, or a loss in general. I wish all of you the best of luck in your TTC journey! :hugs:

So happy for you! I just started reading this thread because I currently have an ectopic pregnancy but your story is motivation! :hugs:


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## breakingdawn

Deedee, I am sorry you are going through an ectopic. But I have carried at least 3 babies through my one remaining tube. (One was a miscarriage unrelated to my tube). My doctor even thinks my right tube may have been bad all along and all my babies have come from my left. There is definitely hope. I wish I had known because when I had my ectopic in 2011 I thought it was over. I was super depressed. It is a miracle I got pregnant again so fast because I was in bad shape mentally. I just do not take to things like that as well as other people. Unfortunately I am fairly negative. :(


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## xxmyheartxx

I lost my left tube yesterday, thankfully before it ruptured, just got back home from hospital. Tummy is very sore and head still groggy. I don't think it's hit me yet xx


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## robo123

Oh my gosh my heart first time I have been on here in a while I am so sorry to hear this! My ectopic is still there slowly resolving with no intervention. Xx


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## xxmyheartxx

I'm glad it's slowly resolving itself hun, 2017 will be our year xxx


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## mod19

Hey how is everyone doing? Sorry I've been mia, just been trying to take a step back and relax from all of this.

Breaking how is the pregnancy going?

Bronte how is everything going with this ivf cycle? How far are you into it?

So this just happened. Never thought I'd see that second line again...ever! On cd28 so still super early, but this little munchkin was conceived around Christmas.
 



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## c.m.c

At my 6 week scan the doctor told me this baby came from my left ovary... yet I only have a right tube!

I'm currently 19 weeks pregnant. This baby is my fourth pregnancy, my second post ectopic and 3rd baby


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## breakingdawn

Wow, Mod! Congrats!! :happy dance: Please keep us posted. I will certainly be wishing the best for you.

I have also been wondering about Bronte -- hope everything is going alright with her.

I have not been on the forums at all. I try and pop in just to see if anyone commented here but it is been fairly hectic.

I am 16 and a half weeks now... roughly. No one seems to know exactly. Lol. I had an appointment on Monday. All they did was one last blood work for genetic stuff and that is it for all that. Yay! We did get to hear baby's heartbeat on the doppler which was nice because I have not felt any movement. I am thinking my placenta may be in the front again this time. Though the nurse did say movements would be inconsistent and hard to catch until 20+ weeks. I am pretty relaxed.

I have a 20 week ultrasound for Feb. 10th I believe.. we will confirm the gender to see if it is still a girl. :) 

Hope everyone else is doing okay. It has been quiet!


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## breakingdawn

c.m.c said:


> At my 6 week scan the doctor told me this baby came from my left ovary... yet I only have a right tube!
> 
> I'm currently 19 weeks pregnant. This baby is my fourth pregnancy, my second post ectopic and 3rd baby

The good tube can actually pick up an egg from the bad side! It is creepy in my mind when I visualize it. :haha: Do you know the gender yet? Girl #3 for us, so they say!


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## BronteForever

Oh Mod - fantastic news. How exciting!!!! Please keep us posted! I'm so happy for you!

Breaking - glad everything is going well for you!

xx - so sorry you had to lose your tube, but sometimes it's for the best since a damaged one can just lead to future ectopics. Hope you are doing alright though. It's hard to go through.

For me, I'm fine. I'm not on here much because I'm busy and mentally trying to keep my head up. My grandmother is probably dying any day and that's a challenge on top of starting a new IVF cycle, but it is what it is and in many ways it's a blessing for her since she's wanted this for several months. She's declining quickly this week though, which is hard to watch. 

Anyway, with IVF I'm still doing Lupron injections and will start stimulation meds as soon as I get my period. Should be any day now.


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## mod19

Bronte I'm so sorry about your grandma. It was like that for mine that it was a blessing for her when she finally did pass, but it was still so hard on everyone else. :hugs:

Definitely stay positive for this round though. You got this. This is your month and you will have an October baby. Which, in my opinion is the best month ;) 

I was pretty shocked about mine. I had convinced myself I wasn't, but tested anyways with the cheapest of cheap tests. Thought I saw a line but couldn't tell since there was an indent on the test so of course I ran right to Walmart to buy a frer and the line popped right up. I had honestly given up.

I feel ok about this pregnancy too. I'm not nervous like I have been all the other times. I feel like everything will be ok.


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## breakingdawn

Bronte-- I'm really sorry to hear about your grandmother. I will be keeping you and your family in my prayers. I'll also be thinking of you as you go through your IVF. We are all rooting for you. 

Mod-- A positive outlook makes a world of difference I've learned. I had so much spotting off and on past 10 weeks it was so hard not to worry every time I went to the bathroom. But all the while I kept a positive outlook as best I could and so far everything is going okay. I hope everything continues to go smoothly for you.


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## mod19

Spotting would freak me out too! But I have heard that it's really pretty common. Good to know bubs is ok through all of that. Have you guys started discussing names yet? That's got to be one of my favorite parts of pregnancy!


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## breakingdawn

We have had name discussions. Not too serious until we get visual confirmation at the 20 week scan. Hehe. I don't think we will announce the name until it's given. In the past I've found people can be pretty nasty with their opinions on your baby names. :( So I don't want anyone making me feel bad and give me doubts!


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## mod19

Bronte how is everything going?
Breaking how are you?

Everyone else?



Well turns out my intuition was way off on this one. I woke up in so much pain yesterday. Went to the dr and while I was waiting for an ultrasound I passed out in the waiting room. I woke up with 4 nurses around me and puke all over myself. Turns out it was another ectopic (3rd one) on the side that I don't even have a tube on. It implanted on the outside of my right ovary. My Dr said she's never seen that before and didn't even know it was possible for it to implant there. Anyways, I was in surgery within 30 minutes of the ultrasound and needless to say, no more pain. What's weird is that I'm not even upset about it. I guess deep down I expected it. My Dr said my left tube still looked great, but I told her I'm not sure we were going to try again after this, to which she responded that she didn't know if she wanted to help me try anymore.


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## breakingdawn

Am I misreading what the doctor said? That didn't seem very nice? Maybe I am reading it wrong. I'm really sorry to hear it was another ectopic. How far along were you? Week wise? Well I feel super bummed for you. I really hope you are doing okay. Maybe after some time you'll feel like trying again. It's really good you still have a good tube. I'll be thinking of you. 

I'm doing okay. Nothing too exciting to report. Just counting down the days until the 20 week scan to make sure everything is still okay since I really feel no movements ever. Then to confirm gender if all is well.

Hope Bronte is doing well... and everyone else.


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## mod19

No my Dr is super sweet and nice, she's just scared for me. My baby needs me and I'm really not sure it would be wise to potentially put myself back in that position. This is the 3rd emergency surgery she has had to perform on me for this reason in the last 3 years. Truly makes me appreciate this little miracle sitting next to me


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## glovities

Hi ladies, glad i found this thread. I just found out about my ectopic last Friday and its Weds now. I got the methatrexate in the Emergency room on friday. It was in my right side and right now i am feeling some alight pain on the right side again. They told me to go back to emerergent room if i was doubled over with pain, which im not. Any advice? Think this is just it working itself out?


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## breakingdawn

I get you now Mod. I can understand that. I'm so sorry you've had to go through this three times. :-( My thoughts are definitely with you.

Glov - welcome and I'm sorry to hear about your experience. I will say that methotrexate didn't work for me. I was in pain 2-3 days after and went back to emergency to find it did rupture. My doctor said if I had waited one more day I might not have survived. I would really trust your gut at this point and go in if you continue to have pain. I was not quite doubled over in pain yet but it was definitely uncomfortable. Please keep us posted.


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## mod19

Bronte how is everything going?


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## mod19

Hope everything is going good for you Bronte.


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## breakingdawn

Would also like to know how she's doing. How are your mod? I hope you are doing okay. 

Had my 20 week scan last Friday. All was well. She's still a she. C section scheduled for June 19th, two days after my youngest bday.


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## BronteForever

Oh Mod - I'm so so sorry for what happened. Sending you so much love and hugs right now. I don't blame you at all for wanting to just put this chapter of your life away. I don't blame you at all. The surgery sounds horrible and I can't believe it attached in the ovary area either. I know it can happen but it's so rare. This sucks. I'm so glad you are alright and were near a hospital when it happened.

Breaking - glad things are progressing for you. 

AFM - this IVF cycle has royally sucked. Amongst the death of my grandmother, dealing with an extremely sick dog and having the most incredibly painful shots (one last night my husband must of hit something like a nerve or something - I don't know what it was but it's still so bad today). I'm so glad the process is coming to an end, but it's definitely bitter sweet. We find out results later today, but I'd be so shocked if it's positive. We transferred a cavitating morula on Day 5, which is not ideal. There was a small sliver of hope it could implant but not likely given how our embryos had been processing over the last two rounds. I've tested negative the last two days. There's a small chance the HCG could only show up on a blood test at this point and not a urine test, but again super slim. We have pretty much accepted it's a negative. We are out of funds and pretty much mental ability to go through another attempt for likely the same results. We could probably attempt 10 more times and one might eventually take, but we are not in a position to do that. So pretty much my worst fear has happened that we wouldn't have anything to show for the process. I will be okay with that in time. But I just need some time. I don't regret doing this at all and I knew I would have always wondered "what if" if I didn't. I'm still always going to probably wonder that and wonder if we hadn't skipped time after our ectopic if we could have had a window of time for success. That will never go away. But at least I don't have even more regret to add on top of it.

Anyway, thanks again for the support and Mod I really and truly am sorry. I'm so glad at least one of us will get a baby with Breaking. And I'm so glad, Mod you have what is surely your little miracle girl. We might move onto adoption in the future so might be able to join you, but not for a little while.


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## breakingdawn

Bronte.. I am really sorry and sad to read your update. Take the time you need for you... and I will surely be thinking of you, and Mod as well. I only ever check in now to see how everyone is doing with the occasional update for me, but I feel bad updating in times like these. I will be thinking of all of you....


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## breakingdawn

Ladies, I am just popping in to say hello and I hope this finds everyone well. I am thinking of all of you.


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## justmeinlove

Positive test this morning :0 Have been on the phone to the dr to get booked in for an early scan. I'll have to wait a week at least though as barely 4 weeks atm. I imagine I would be more anxious if I wasn't wiped out from a family attack of noro this week! :0


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## breakingdawn

Good luck to you!


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## justmeinlove

Thanks!


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## breakingdawn

I doubt anyone follows this anymore but that is okay. :) Just thought I would update, I am 37 weeks pregnant and the furthest I have made it with either child. I am 2 weeks to the day away from c-section day, if she holds on that long. My bag is packed though and am prepared since I can go at any given moment from here on out. If anyone is reading this anymore, I hope it finds you well and happy. Thank you for all the support!


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## justmeinlove

Oooh good luck! &#128578;


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## breakingdawn

Our sweet baby is here... 6lbs and 13oz
 



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## breakingdawn

No idea why it went sideways!


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## justmeinlove

Ooh! Congratulations!!


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## BronteForever

Breaking - just saw this. What a great photo. Huge congrats on the new addition to the family!


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## breakingdawn

Thank you so much. Our first night home was a little rough, but it's an adjustment for everyone. We feel very blessed.


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