# playing catch up



## alibaba24

Hi all :flower:

my daughter has a speech delay/disorder 

more specifically language understanding is what she really struggles with but she is improving every day. I think from what iv read its a disorder due to her abnormal way that she learns language. 

I was always told myself once she knew the basics she would start to put other language together herself..

I dont know why but last night i started googling language disorders to see specifically if children catch up and the ultimate answer seem to be no. I feel absolutely gutted at this prospect

currently her language understanding is at a 3-3.6 year old level although SALT warned me this age guide was not always the best guide to go on

this year alone my daughter has made amazing progress ( I think)

shes asking "who is that" "where is that" "where do you want to go?"

she has a little game and she will say to me "you smell like poop!" blush:) and things like this shes developing a small way of joking

me - are you a girl or a boy?
her - A BOY!!!! (exagerated silly voice)
me - oh ok your a boy
her (NOOOOOO! IM A GIRL!)

I find it really difficult to process she will never catch up to where her peers are these articles all said that its likely she wont ever understand metaphores similies jokes etc

anyone have any actual experience with this?

she can repeat like a parrot she in her report is "highly intelligable"

she just forgets words like "is" "the" everyone is a he she forgets to say she


I just feel really down about what iv researched and wish I hadn't bothered


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## PresqueVu

Didn't want to read and run :hugs:

If it's anything like the reading I've been doing around my son's issues, a lot of information out there directly contradicts itself and it can be really hard to distinguish. If it's making you feel less hopeful, then it is just not helping - it doesn't matter what people think, and it doesn't neccesarily matter what other children are doing at the same age.

It matters how your daughter is in relation to herself imo and that you are getting any support that is needed. It sounds like she is a lovely little character and you have a lot of progress you can both be proud of, and that's amazing! :flower:


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## annanouska

:hugs: step away from Google! I'm terrible for it but it really doesn't help :dohh:

Ds has language disorder, he learns language in a weird way too. He could say "oh look it's dads car" a few months ago but learnt to say mum just before Christmas :cloud9:

He learns the most weird words...eg animals he can say cat (we have two) and giraffe?!! Yet the most basic things he can't say. Our salt says it's harder to treat as its more complex but she's confident we will get there.

He can have small conversations with us as we can direct to what he can say eg...where's the cat and he will respond oh look cat.

Sounds like your girl is doing great. We repeat things often, use sign and pictures. He is awaiting results as he has epilepsy and something wrong on mri scan so not sure if that's triggering it. I ty not to dwell on it now, focus on th positives the improvements etc x


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## alibaba24

annanouska said:


> :hugs: step away from Google! I'm terrible for it but it really doesn't help :dohh:
> 
> Ds has language disorder, he learns language in a weird way too. He could say "oh look it's dads car" a few months ago but learnt to say mum just before Christmas :cloud9:
> 
> He learns the most weird words...eg animals he can say cat (we have two) and giraffe?!! Yet the most basic things he can't say. Our salt says it's harder to treat as its more complex but she's confident we will get there.
> 
> He can have small conversations with us as we can direct to what he can say eg...where's the cat and he will respond oh look cat.
> 
> Sounds like your girl is doing great. We repeat things often, use sign and pictures. He is awaiting results as he has epilepsy and something wrong on mri scan so not sure if that's triggering it. I ty not to dwell on it now, focus on th positives the improvements etc x

:haha: :rofl: you are so right about google lol

I wish I had not even bothered. She has made amazing progress she has been in speech therapy for less than a year and in blocks too she had no speech therapy for 8 weeks over the summer and she has gone from talking in "jargon" to 5-6 word sentences sometimes more. asking and answering questions. following 4 keyword instruction. She can SAY anything she just can't always apply meaning to it. she knows all her alphabet. numbers. colours. days of the week.animals. animal sounds and starting to pick up words from sight. shes very clear on what she wants when she's hungry, cold, unwell, thirsty . a place she wants to go or doesnt want to go.
the best bit of all is this one and i have waited so long to hear it

" mum what does ----- mean?" :cloud9:

I Felt like once she started asking that she would learn so much more

we are scottish and often refer to the cold weather as baltic. She said to me "whats baltic mean?" I Told her baltic means freezing cold and every since its been like . whats this mean whats that mean which I think is great considering the little therapy she has had (25 min a week ) not consistently every week.

Im too scared to ask salt if she thinks she will catch up or not :nope:

Now that I have written this all down I feel a bit better as she really has made huge progress in less than a year. if her language keeps snowballing like this I will keep praying she will "get it"


thanks both of you for replying :hugs:

xx


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## Thurinius

alibaba24 said:


> annanouska said:
> 
> 
> :hugs: step away from Google! I'm terrible for it but it really doesn't help :dohh:
> 
> Ds has language disorder, he learns language in a weird way too. He could say "oh look it's dads car" a few months ago but learnt to say mum just before Christmas :cloud9:
> 
> He learns the most weird words...eg animals he can say cat (we have two) and giraffe?!! Yet the most basic things he can't say. Our salt says it's harder to treat as its more complex but she's confident we will get there.
> 
> He can have small conversations with us as we can direct to what he can say eg...where's the cat and he will respond oh look cat.
> 
> Sounds like your girl is doing great. We repeat things often, use sign and pictures. He is awaiting results as he has epilepsy and something wrong on mri scan so not sure if that's triggering it. I ty not to dwell on it now, focus on th positives the improvements etc x
> 
> :haha: :rofl: you are so right about google lol
> 
> I wish I had not even bothered. She has made amazing progress she has been in speech therapy for less than a year and in blocks too she had no speech therapy for 8 weeks over the summer and she has gone from talking in "jargon" to 5-6 word sentences sometimes more. asking and answering questions. following 4 keyword instruction. She can SAY anything she just can't always apply meaning to it. she knows all her alphabet. numbers. colours. days of the week.animals. animal sounds and starting to pick up words from sight. shes very clear on what she wants when she's hungry, cold, unwell, thirsty . a place she wants to go or doesnt want to go.
> the best bit of all is this one and i have waited so long to hear it
> 
> " mum what does ----- mean?" :cloud9:
> 
> I Felt like once she started asking that she would learn so much more
> 
> we are scottish and often refer to the cold weather as baltic. She said to me "whats baltic mean?" I Told her baltic means freezing cold and every since its been like . whats this mean whats that mean which I think is great considering the little therapy she has had (25 min a week ) not consistently every week.
> 
> Im too scared to ask salt if she thinks she will catch up or not :nope:
> 
> Now that I have written this all down I feel a bit better as she really has made huge progress in less than a year. if her language keeps snowballing like this I will keep praying she will "get it"
> 
> 
> thanks both of you for replying :hugs:
> 
> xxClick to expand...

That gives me so much hope for my son who is nowhere near your daughter in speech terms. We are six months into speech therapy and I would so love him to ask me a question. But yesterday he said to my husband "you're my daddy'
Which just amazed us both


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## alibaba24

Thurinius said:


> alibaba24 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> annanouska said:
> 
> 
> :hugs: step away from Google! I'm terrible for it but it really doesn't help :dohh:
> 
> Ds has language disorder, he learns language in a weird way too. He could say "oh look it's dads car" a few months ago but learnt to say mum just before Christmas :cloud9:
> 
> He learns the most weird words...eg animals he can say cat (we have two) and giraffe?!! Yet the most basic things he can't say. Our salt says it's harder to treat as its more complex but she's confident we will get there.
> 
> He can have small conversations with us as we can direct to what he can say eg...where's the cat and he will respond oh look cat.
> 
> Sounds like your girl is doing great. We repeat things often, use sign and pictures. He is awaiting results as he has epilepsy and something wrong on mri scan so not sure if that's triggering it. I ty not to dwell on it now, focus on th positives the improvements etc x
> 
> :haha: :rofl: you are so right about google lol
> 
> I wish I had not even bothered. She has made amazing progress she has been in speech therapy for less than a year and in blocks too she had no speech therapy for 8 weeks over the summer and she has gone from talking in "jargon" to 5-6 word sentences sometimes more. asking and answering questions. following 4 keyword instruction. She can SAY anything she just can't always apply meaning to it. she knows all her alphabet. numbers. colours. days of the week.animals. animal sounds and starting to pick up words from sight. shes very clear on what she wants when she's hungry, cold, unwell, thirsty . a place she wants to go or doesnt want to go.
> the best bit of all is this one and i have waited so long to hear it
> 
> " mum what does ----- mean?" :cloud9:
> 
> I Felt like once she started asking that she would learn so much more
> 
> we are scottish and often refer to the cold weather as baltic. She said to me "whats baltic mean?" I Told her baltic means freezing cold and every since its been like . whats this mean whats that mean which I think is great considering the little therapy she has had (25 min a week ) not consistently every week.
> 
> Im too scared to ask salt if she thinks she will catch up or not :nope:
> 
> Now that I have written this all down I feel a bit better as she really has made huge progress in less than a year. if her language keeps snowballing like this I will keep praying she will "get it"
> 
> 
> thanks both of you for replying :hugs:
> 
> xxClick to expand...
> 
> That gives me so much hope for my son who is nowhere near your daughter in speech terms. We are six months into speech therapy and I would so love him to ask me a question. But yesterday he said to my husband "you're my daddy'
> Which just amazed us bothClick to expand...


thats a really brilliant sentence using the word your and in correct context too you must be delighted! :happydance:

There is hope to be had for sure x


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## veganmama

i wish mine would ask questions. how old was your LO when she started asking questions? 

she sounds like shes doing pretty good for 5 years old

just wondering how was she at 3 years old?


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## RachA

It sounds like she is doing great :)

One thing I would say is that it might well be true that she won't catch up but being 18mths behind her peers at 18years isn't as big a gap as at 5 years. 
I guess she may never understand metaphors etc but there are people out there who don't have speech delays that don't understand them either etc. 

These little things are what makes your daughter unique and I think embracing her differences is the way forward. 

Your daughter sounds like mine. She doesn't bother with linking words. She is in the process of being taught her prepositions as she didn't have a clue. She has no concept of today, yesterday, tomorrow, an hour etc. 
Its taken a long time but I finally accepted that I don't care where she ends up academically as long as she is happy.


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## alibaba24

veganmama said:


> i wish mine would ask questions. how old was your LO when she started asking questions?
> 
> she sounds like shes doing pretty good for 5 years old
> 
> just wondering how was she at 3 years old?

very much full of echolia and using single keywords. had some sensory issues too which she seems to be outgrowing her nursery teachers have also commented on the transformation in her x


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## alibaba24

RachA said:


> It sounds like she is doing great :)
> 
> One thing I would say is that it might well be true that she won't catch up but being 18mths behind her peers at 18years isn't as big a gap as at 5 years.
> I guess she may never understand metaphors etc but there are people out there who don't have speech delays that don't understand them either etc.
> 
> These little things are what makes your daughter unique and I think embracing her differences is the way forward.
> 
> Your daughter sounds like mine. She doesn't bother with linking words. She is in the process of being taught her prepositions as she didn't have a clue. She has no concept of today, yesterday, tomorrow, an hour etc.
> Its taken a long time but I finally accepted that I don't care where she ends up academically as long as she is happy.

when you put it like that i suppose the 18 month old gap Isn't too bad :flower:

my daughter doesnt have much comment of time she understands tomorrow and yesterday but thats all x


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## RachA

The benefit of having had longer to process things has a lot of baring on how you feel. I was devastated when we were first told she was 18 months behind. Over time you begin to accept things you never thought would be possible.

She looked out of the window this morning and went 'yay, snow in garden' I was over the moon that she'd used the word 'in' It's an improvement that's bringing her closer to being able to talk properly yet 2 years ago I would of though that was nothing to brag about.


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## Thurinius

We had 'don't want' today which I thought another marvellous progression.
I get most frustrated by the fact he doesn't respond to queries. So I come home and ask him probably twenty times 'what did you do today?' And I get absolutely nothing in response. 
I'd just like something back - even if it were a 'nothing'


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## alibaba24

Thurinius said:


> We had 'don't want' today which I thought another marvellous progression.
> I get most frustrated by the fact he doesn't respond to queries. So I come home and ask him probably twenty times 'what did you do today?' And I get absolutely nothing in response.
> I'd just like something back - even if it were a 'nothing'

My daughter used to do this and i have chalked it up to her not actually knowing what I was asking. sometimes she still finds conversation hard. when i pick her up from pre school it goes like this

me - what did you do today? 
her- i played
me - who did you play with
her - xyz
me - what else did you do?
her - singing songs
me - what songs
her - twinkle twinkle
me - did you read a story? 
her - yes 

and it goes on like that. other times i will say what did you do today and she will say "mum thats enough talking" she gets frustrated because she has to work so hard at knowing the answers and processing the question. it will come. this time last year i had the same response as you did. no answer. nada. Or an answer that was not even relevent to the question


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## alibaba24

RachA said:


> The benefit of having had longer to process things has a lot of baring on how you feel. I was devastated when we were first told she was 18 months behind. Over time you begin to accept things you never thought would be possible.
> 
> She looked out of the window this morning and went 'yay, snow in garden' I was over the moon that she'd used the word 'in' It's an improvement that's bringing her closer to being able to talk properly yet 2 years ago I would of though that was nothing to brag about.

I can totally understand this often those close to my daughter will get excited when she puts together a really good sentence for me i was excited when her cousin told me he wanted chips. she was obviously listening and said to me 

"mum I want chips. Ben wants chips aswell" I was delighted that she used the word aswell this is new to her and that she had been listening in and contributed her part to the conversation


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## RachA

Thurinius said:


> We had 'don't want' today which I thought another marvellous progression.
> I get most frustrated by the fact he doesn't respond to queries. So I come home and ask him probably twenty times 'what did you do today?' And I get absolutely nothing in response.
> I'd just like something back - even if it were a 'nothing'

Might be an obvious question but have you tried asking in a different way? I don't think it means much when I ask Esther what she's done that day. I generally know the types of things that she does do so I then ask 'did you do....' I'm much more likely to get an answer to this.


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## alibaba24

I just got a letter today saying my daughter has been offered a place in a preschool with a language unit . Im happy that she will have this opportunity before starting school this summer but sad shes not getting to finish up with her current preschool where she is happy and settled. they have also put her name forward for their early years programme where she will do split days between mainstream and this unit depending on if she needs it then. her salt said yesterday she has progressed alot since her last report in december and that her Iep needs changed to challenge her more x


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## mummy2o

alibaba24 said:


> Thurinius said:
> 
> 
> We had 'don't want' today which I thought another marvellous progression.
> I get most frustrated by the fact he doesn't respond to queries. So I come home and ask him probably twenty times 'what did you do today?' And I get absolutely nothing in response.
> I'd just like something back - even if it were a 'nothing'
> 
> My daughter used to do this and i have chalked it up to her not actually knowing what I was asking. sometimes she still finds conversation hard. when i pick her up from pre school it goes like this
> 
> me - what did you do today?
> her- i played
> me - who did you play with
> her - xyz
> me - what else did you do?
> her - singing songs
> me - what songs
> her - twinkle twinkle
> me - did you read a story?
> her - yes
> 
> and it goes on like that. other times i will say what did you do today and she will say "mum thats enough talking" she gets frustrated because she has to work so hard at knowing the answers and processing the question. it will come. this time last year i had the same response as you did. no answer. nada. Or an answer that was not even relevent to the questionClick to expand...

That's better than what my son can do and he'll be 8 in april. He's getting better daily, but its hit and miss what kind of conversation we get. After school he's so tired from doing hard work all day and once he gets home on the bus just before 4, he just wants to relax and do his own thing. Telling me what he's done is the last thing on his mind. In the morning he will tell me what he's going to do at school that day though. The weekend is better though as he's not tired and we can have proper conversations about his special interests or what he or his sister is doing. It could also be doing to the processing though as it can take him a while to answer even 1 on 1 with no distractions. But I learnt this is pretty normal with autism and I'm guessing speech delays also.


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## RachA

alibaba24 said:


> I just got a letter today saying my daughter has been offered a place in a preschool with a language unit . Im happy that she will have this opportunity before starting school this summer but sad shes not getting to finish up with her current preschool where she is happy and settled. they have also put her name forward for their early years programme where she will do split days between mainstream and this unit depending on if she needs it then. her salt said yesterday she has progressed alot since her last report in december and that her Iep needs changed to challenge her more x

That's great that she's got a place in the specialist nursery. Hopefully it'll be really helpful for her. 

Esther's just had her new IEP done. Most of it seems so simple! She's got 5 I targets I think. One is to expand her sentances so she is saying 'boy IS drinking orange' as she leaves out the linking words. And another is to get her writing the E, S and T of her name-currently she can do the E and that's it. One is to get her to actually play with another child for 5min or more as currently she doesn't really play with the children in her class. Can't actually remember the others :dohh:


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## alibaba24

RachA said:


> alibaba24 said:
> 
> 
> I just got a letter today saying my daughter has been offered a place in a preschool with a language unit . Im happy that she will have this opportunity before starting school this summer but sad shes not getting to finish up with her current preschool where she is happy and settled. they have also put her name forward for their early years programme where she will do split days between mainstream and this unit depending on if she needs it then. her salt said yesterday she has progressed alot since her last report in december and that her Iep needs changed to challenge her more x
> 
> That's great that she's got a place in the specialist nursery. Hopefully it'll be really helpful for her.
> 
> Esther's just had her new IEP done. Most of it seems so simple! She's got 5 I targets I think. One is to expand her sentances so she is saying 'boy IS drinking orange' as she leaves out the linking words. And another is to get her writing the E, S and T of her name-currently she can do the E and that's it. One is to get her to actually play with another child for 5min or more as currently she doesn't really play with the children in her class. Can't actually remember the others :dohh:Click to expand...

i know im hopefull it will expand her language more exactly like your daughter she forgets her linking words unless its a learned phrased then it sounds fine . I found out also that another little girl from her session is also going so that really made me feel better than she has a familiar face there too :flower:

my girl can write her name but it really looks awful her letters are very big and far apart she can easily take up quarter of a page with her name only :haha:


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## RachA

That's really good that another girl is going that she knows :) 

Funny how they pick up the linking words when they learn a set phrase. 
Esther's letters are like that too-she's doing a lot of tracing of her name and the letters are about 1 1/2 - 2 inches high. 
I'm just incredibly thankful that she's an October birthday and therefore one of the oldest in her class. It means that where she is 18 months behind then she's just a little behind the youngest in her class. My son is an August birthday and had he had the same issues then he would of been nearly 2 years behind.


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## alibaba24

RachA said:


> That's really good that another girl is going that she knows :)
> 
> Funny how they pick up the linking words when they learn a set phrase.
> Esther's letters are like that too-she's doing a lot of tracing of her name and the letters are about 1 1/2 - 2 inches high.
> I'm just incredibly thankful that she's an October birthday and therefore one of the oldest in her class. It means that where she is 18 months behind then she's just a little behind the youngest in her class. My son is an August birthday and had he had the same issues then he would of been nearly 2 years behind.

same situation here with the age we kept her back a year from starting school so shes going to be one of the oldest in her class which im hoping will be more in her comfort level as she will be in with a mix of 4 and 5 year olds . can you buy specific tracing sheets ?

I think although not sure with learned phrases they are just saying the words because they know its the appropriate response. they arent actually putting any thought into it so the linking words are just memorised . when they are talking for themselves and not just copying a phrase thats when i think the forgetting happens. words like "the" my daughter forgets all the time


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## RachA

I'm sure you can buy specific sheets but you could just print off letters and pictures for her to trace over.

Esther used things like this first of all at school. They had pictures too of trees, houses, flowers etc 



We also bought her a wipe clean book of a similar thing from WHSmiths. I think it was in the preschool section. 

That sound true about the linking words. I do sometimes wonder if Esther will actually ever pick up the linking words. We repeat things so many times and it takes an age for things to go in. Except songs-give her a short song to listen to 2 or 3 times and that's it, she'll be singing along almost word perfect!


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## alibaba24

RachA said:


> I'm sure you can buy specific sheets but you could just print off letters and pictures for her to trace over.
> 
> Esther used things like this first of all at school. They had pictures too of trees, houses, flowers etc
> 
> View attachment 843523
> 
> 
> We also bought her a wipe clean book of a similar thing from WHSmiths. I think it was in the preschool section.
> 
> That sound true about the linking words. I do sometimes wonder if Esther will actually ever pick up the linking words. We repeat things so many times and it takes an age for things to go in. Except songs-give her a short song to listen to 2 or 3 times and that's it, she'll be singing along almost word perfect!

our girls sound very similar! she can sing every word perfectly nothing is forgotten but spoken is completely different it really baffles me. after about 4 weeks now of actively encouraging her to say "she" for girl (everyone was he before) she actually said this morning " I don't know where she is" talking about her peppa toy. Im sure she will still forget but the fact it came to her herself i felt relieved after all my emphasising the she in sentences. i feel like a parrot at times lol


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