# Where do I start for Adoption-US



## Titi

Help!

This is our last cycle ttc #1 in the two year frame-next month begins year 3. I'm 35, dh is going to be 37 next month, we've been together ten years and are desparate to be parents.
I've begun researching adoption but it's overwhelming!!! I don't even know how to start.
We certainly can't afford now the $18,000-$40,000 USD cost for adopting as research seems to indicate it will cost.
I would love an infant, as I don't think we'll ever be able to "make" our own baby so it is hard to imagine not even being able to get someone else's baby, but of course the costs are so much higher.
We would be open to starting with an older child, or one with maybe some special physical or emotional needs, or maybe even siblings-I just don't know how/where to start.
We are Christian (Catholic)........the church hasn't been able to help us.
I know that there are some "for profit" agencies and lots of other "non-profit" agenicies. I LOVE the idea of helping a needy child as opposed to just fullfilling our selfish wish of being parents to a new baby-but I need help-please!!!!!!!! 
PS-I live in Florida.


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## junemomma09

I'm so sorry to hear of your difficulties. Have you thought of other options as well? I'm not familiar with many of them, but ivf, or surrogacy? I hope you find the answers you're looking for!


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## Titi

oh thank you for answering! I dunno what to do honestly. IVF is actually against our religion and beliefs and very costly!!!! I feel like I don't have enough options. And I'd love to adopt a newborn but also so costly!!!! How do people do it???????? 

I see you are in FL? Where from? I'm in Cape Coral.


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## Samantha675

I am starting to research adoption as well and found this like to be very interesting.

https://costs.adoption.com/

Adopting from the U.S. foster care system is generally the least expensive type of adoption, usually involving little or no cost, and states often provide subsidies to adoptive parents. 
There are a growing number of resources to help manage the cost of adoption, including tax benefits (some of which apply to public agency adoptions as well), loans, employer benefits, and others.


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## junemomma09

I don't know much about adoption. But my best friend adopted a little girl last year. She went through an attorney. But she already had prospective parents who wanted her to adopt their baby. She knew them through someone else. 
You could try finding adoption agencies online or calling an attorney who specializes in adoption. 
I'm in jacksonville by the way.


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## junemomma09

Also have you thought of surrogacy, as you can use your egg and would have your biological baby but another woman would carry the baby. 
Not sure if that's against the catholic religion belief or not. Just throwing that out there as a possibility.


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## Titi

Samantha675-thanks for the info! maybe we can be "adoption buddies"? I can't fathom doing this alone...........are you looking to adopt foster child?


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## Titi

junemomma09 said:


> Also have you thought of surrogacy, as you can use your egg and would have your biological baby but another woman would carry the baby.
> Not sure if that's against the catholic religion belief or not. Just throwing that out there as a possibility.

I don't think we can do that, but honestly don't know. The thing is there is nothing wrong with my body-so if anyone should carry my egg......I would want it to be me!!!!!!!! It's so frusterating. It seems it is a problem with dh motility.


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## junemomma09

I'm sorry to hear that. Well I hope you are able to find the answers you are looking for.


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## bek74

Titi said:


> junemomma09 said:
> 
> 
> Also have you thought of surrogacy, as you can use your egg and would have your biological baby but another woman would carry the baby.
> Not sure if that's against the catholic religion belief or not. Just throwing that out there as a possibility.
> 
> I don't think we can do that, but honestly don't know. The thing is there is nothing wrong with my body-so if anyone should carry my egg......I would want it to be me!!!!!!!! It's so frusterating. It seems it is a problem with dh motility.Click to expand...

If your all good and it is just DH can you do IUI, which is were they get your hubby's sperm and insert right up to where the egg releases. So no injections no mixing in a lab like full IVF.. It is YOUR egg and his sperm, it just brings the sperm closer to your egg to help things along.

I know you said IVF is against your religon, but would IUI be ok..


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## Titi

bek74 said:


> Titi said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> junemomma09 said:
> 
> 
> Also have you thought of surrogacy, as you can use your egg and would have your biological baby but another woman would carry the baby.
> Not sure if that's against the catholic religion belief or not. Just throwing that out there as a possibility.
> 
> I don't think we can do that, but honestly don't know. The thing is there is nothing wrong with my body-so if anyone should carry my egg......I would want it to be me!!!!!!!! It's so frusterating. It seems it is a problem with dh motility.Click to expand...
> 
> If your all good and it is just DH can you do IUI, which is were they get your hubby's sperm and insert right up to where the egg releases. So no injections no mixing in a lab like full IVF.. It is YOUR egg and his sperm, it just brings the sperm closer to your egg to help things along.
> 
> I know you said IVF is against your religon, but would IUI be ok..Click to expand...

Thanks so much...We would probably give this a try. I think our religion's view on IUI is "undecided".


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## bek74

Titi said:


> bek74 said:
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> Titi said:
> 
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> junemomma09 said:
> 
> 
> Also have you thought of surrogacy, as you can use your egg and would have your biological baby but another woman would carry the baby.
> Not sure if that's against the catholic religion belief or not. Just throwing that out there as a possibility.
> 
> I don't think we can do that, but honestly don't know. The thing is there is nothing wrong with my body-so if anyone should carry my egg......I would want it to be me!!!!!!!! It's so frusterating. It seems it is a problem with dh motility.Click to expand...
> 
> If your all good and it is just DH can you do IUI, which is were they get your hubby's sperm and insert right up to where the egg releases. So no injections no mixing in a lab like full IVF.. It is YOUR egg and his sperm, it just brings the sperm closer to your egg to help things along.
> 
> I know you said IVF is against your religon, but would IUI be ok..Click to expand...
> 
> Thanks so much...We would probably give this a try. I think our religion's view on IUI is "undecided".Click to expand...

That would be great, I wish you all the luck hun...


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## Titi

Thanks hun! How exciting was twins? They are gorgeous! I have twin brothers and DH and I want twins (or more) so badly!!!!! Esp. now, at our age-expanding our family quickly would be perfect!


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