# Is there any foster mummy's out there??



## helloeveryone

Hi just trying to find any foster mummy out there in the uk..

Just in the very early days of looking into it and would love to know about all the good. Points of fostering and bad points..

I have got 6 children of my own from 2 years old to 16 years old..
Only one small room left spare to foster in..
But still feel I have the time and skills and love to give another child....


Any one out there who can help answer my busy head of question...


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## Lolly1985

Hello... 

have you tried:

https://www.adoptionuk.org/forums/foster-carers

lots of very experienced FC on there. Good luck! xxx


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## helloeveryone

Thanks lolly1985 I will take a look now,,

Congratulations on getting your daughter,,do you know when you get her??
You must be soo excited...xxx


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## Lolly1985

Today, about half an hour ago!! We are a family :D xx


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## helloeveryone

Soo happy for you,,exciting times ahead..
Take care xx


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## Lolly1985

Thank you, hope you find some valuable support. Foster carers do a wonderful job xxx


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## Lolly1985

Thank you, hope you find some valuable support. Foster carers do a wonderful job xxx


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## helloeveryone

Little update...
Got sent a email from foster people,,
Saying roughly,thanks for you interest in fostering. We will give you a call in 6 months so my little boy can get used to sharing with his brothers,,then they will call me back and get things started...
But due to the ages of my children they would only be able to offer me a 0 to 2 years old to start with....

Couldn't sleep last night I' m soo excited to get things started..
Been looking on ebay for a new cot bed and new bedding...
I know it's a long road ahead until we get our foster baby/child but I can't wait...

Hope this 1st stage 6 months goes fast. ...

And hi to lolly1985 hope you are injoying being a family at last...
Will you still be fostering ??


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## Lolly1985

That's brilliant news, really happy things are moving. I'm actually not a foster carer, although did go through some of the fostering home study a few years back in order to provide respite care in my home. I posted the link originally as it is a more active fostering board in the UK ( noticed when visiting for adoption pages) Hasit been any help? Our little girl was in foster care from leaving hospital at 6 days old and stayed with them until 10 months. They have given her the best start and she is thriving xxx


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## helloeveryone

Little update we have to move the Room I plan to foster in is to small it has to be 6 ft by 6 ft at least..
We have to move and then wait 6 months before they can even start anything :dohh::dohh::dohh: I was so excited to start soon..
The house we have seen that we like has 6 bedroom so lots of room for us and one spare room for foster child, I just hope that they say yes to us...
As we are planing on spending loads of money moving to a big house,in the hope that they will say yes you can foster....


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## Mummys2be

Hi

My mother is a foster carer and it is a very rewarding experience, I am very close with my parents so love meeting the new additions as they come and go, she has had a little girl for almost a year now who was only 18 months when she first came, she was very delayed developmentally and has come on leaps and bound since being with my parents i am dreading the day she has to leave us we have come to love her, thats the hardest part, letting them go, weather they are going home or getting a brand new mummy & daddy.

My auntie is also a foster carer and has has hundreds of children especially babies, sometimes they come to her only a few hours or a day old and she has them for a couple of years before they go to their new families.

All children get a life story made for them and they include pictures and stories of foster families, and keepsakes.

It took my mum a year to get through to panel and get a yes, and she loves it, im surew you will too!

good luck! x


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## helloeveryone

Thanks mummytobe for letting me know about your family.
I am so excited to get started,I am a bit worried they will say no to me,but I know we will make a lovely family,for any foster child to join us for a while..
I know it will be hard some days but I am a so organised mum,that I can cope with anything...
Would love to start with the baby stage then down the line to the toddler age and then when my children are older move to foster the older children,then going on to disabled children one day...

Would love to foster at least 100 babies and children..
Would love any more help and advice so I can be ready when the time comes to it..


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## helloeveryone

Quick update we moved to a lovely 6 bedroom house and we have our 1st visit tomorrow to meet with us and talk things through.
Soo excited and a lot scared they will say no to us..
So looking forwards to fostering I love babies and children and I know we would make a lovely foster family..
We are decorating the planned foster room today,I know it's early but we couldn't wait..
Hopefully things go well tomorrow.


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## helloeveryone

Foster Meeting went well they liked us as a family, the lady said she would have to speak to her manager to see if they can go ahead with us.

GOOD NEWS we go for foster training next month. I'm so excited and nervous. 

It would be good to hear from anyone on what to expect from foster training or about anything about fostering...


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## Mintastic

Any updates?


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## helloeveryone

Mintastic said:


> Any updates?

Foster training went well. We are still rearly keen to still go ahead and foster.
We picked our 6 references and they have all filled in there forms.
So we are now waiting for some of them to have interviews.
Still so excited,...


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## helloeveryone

Not much of a update still waiting to hear when next meeting is.

Feeling a bit down lately, I am so excited and Looking forward to fostering.
But feeling a bit nervous that we might get turned down .

And my dream of fostering and helping child feel wanted and loved would be gone.


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## Mintastic

That's understandable to feel nervous. Is there a particular concern you have? A reason you think they might say no?
We are in a bit of the same boat as you used to be. We want to foster but don't have an appropriate extra bedroom so we have to wait until we can find a new place and move - which is tough because right now I live within walking distance of my job and it will be hard to give that up.


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## helloeveryone

Mintastic said:


> That's understandable to feel nervous. Is there a particular concern you have? A reason you think they might say no?
> We are in a bit of the same boat as you used to be. We want to foster but don't have an appropriate extra bedroom so we have to wait until we can find a new place and move - which is tough because right now I live within walking distance of my job and it will be hard to give that up.

Nice to see someone else is about to read about my journey hopefully to being a foster carer...

Any way is answer to your question, I think it is the internet in making me worried there is so many different story's about getting turned down for silly things. I can't think of any real reason why they might turn us down.
We are a big happy family and I know I cope with all 6 of my children well, I am a very organised person, so every thing always goes to plan most of the time. 

It must be hard for you not having room to foster when you want to.
How long will you have to wait until you can move to some where bigger ?

That must be nice living near where you work, 
I used to walk all my kids to school but since we moved I have to drive them,which was a pain to start with but we are used to it now.
How long have you thought about fostering for ?
Any way better go now to start on dinner..


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## helloeveryone

Quick update....
Getting quite excited that we might be able to foster soon. But for now there is so much paper work to get through.
We have another home visit next week.:happydance:
My children are looking forward to fostering,and my second son keeps saying things like "when the foster child comes I will share my toys with him or her".


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## Mintastic

Thanks for the update. I hope the home visit went well if you already had it!


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## helloeveryone

Last home visit went well..
I have another home visit today, excited and a little bit nervous ..
This time she is interviewing the children, and seeing how they feel about things.
They are excited to start fostering like me, but proberly are not as excited as me...


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## helloeveryone

Yesterday's home visit went well.. Another one next week :happydance:


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## Mintastic

Great! Thanks for the updates.


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## helloeveryone

Mintastic said:


> Great! Thanks for the updates.

No problem,glad to know someone is listening,and I'm not talking to myself LOL xx


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## helloeveryone

Last meeting went well, getting excited about it now, I will be so gutted if we get turned down.
I have started to but a few bits if we do foster.
So far I have brought girls and boys knickers and pants and socks age ranging from birth to 6 year old.
A night light a torch also a plug in night light .
A bed,
some pull up pants some for girls and some for boys.
I did look at buying some night wear bits but to be honest it's all getting a bit expensive, when I don't even know if I will be excepted.

But I don't mind buying some bits ..I'm excited...:happydance:


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## Savasanna

Hi everyone. I just wanted to take a moment to introduce myself. My wife and I have been ttc for 14 months and have just last week completed our application to become a foster family. We're waiting to hear back from DHHS to see what/when the next steps are. Any idea how long it will take to become licensed? We're signed up for the required classes at the end of January. Would it be too soon to hope for March?

I'm still quite new to this whole situation. It's very exciting and very scary!


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## helloeveryone

Savasanna said:


> Hi everyone. I just wanted to take a moment to introduce myself. My wife and I have been ttc for 14 months and have just last week completed our application to become a foster family. We're waiting to hear back from DHHS to see what/when the next steps are. Any idea how long it will take to become licensed? We're signed up for the required classes at the end of January. Would it be too soon to hope for March?
> 
> I'm still quite new to this whole situation. It's very exciting and very scary!

Hi wecome, yes it it excited and scary, are you in the uk, because if you are march is maybe being a bit too hopeful...
I have rearly injoyed training back in July and we go to panel in February.
One piece of advice I can offer you is go to your library and get lots of books out, last week I got out 11 books so I am trying to read them all now, wishing I got them out months ago.
But if you can read a few before training I think it will help you.
What age group are you hoping to foster ?


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## Savasanna

We live in the states so it will be interesting to see how the processes differ from one another! I don't believe we have to go before a panel over here. We have to do criminal/background checks, a medical release, a fire inspection of the home, a full home study (that's the one that I'm not sure how long it will take), reference checks and the three week training. During our informational meeting we were told they like to have the licensing process completed within 120 days.. but I can only imagine that's a goal number and not necessarily something to quote.

We're planning on fostering babies, preferably under 6 months. We hope to adopt through this process as well, although obviously there's no way of know when that will be. What age range are you interested in?

Oh, and nice to meet you! I've found this forum to be really helpful and supportive over the past year(+) and I was sad to let it go. I'm glad there's a fostering group on here too.


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## helloeveryone

Quite nervous today, in a few days my social worker starts her 1st interview, then another 5 in the next few weeks. 
Feeling excited , nervous, scared, then excited again.

But just pleased things are moving in the right direction ...


I can't wait until I can call myself a foster carer.:happydance::happydance:
Xxx


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## Baby_Dreams

Good luck in your journey xx


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## helloeveryone

Baby_Dreams said:


> Good luck in your journey xx

Thanks xxx


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## helloeveryone

Feeling more excited today, it's nice to think I might be fostering next month.xx :happydance:

Anyone else out there who is close to fostering hopefully ?


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## Savasanna

We heard back and have our home study scheduled! It's scheduled for this Friday and then again the following Monday. The licensing worker said she was impressed with how quickly we have gotten everything in, and that she would contact the fire marshall to let them know we are motivated. We're thinking our goal to be fully licensed by the end of February might actually become a reality! Woohoo! 

Bought a stroller the other day. Feels so surreal.. I can't believe this is all actually happening!


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## helloeveryone

That's good news savasanna hope things go quickly for you and we are both fostering in February/march. :happydance:

I was thinking about buying a buggy, but it is so hard with not knowing which age group I might get a newborn or a three year old needs a different type of buggy. 
Which one did you go for ?
Exciting isn't it ? 
We have got the foster room finished with furniture in.
I find I am always in the room looking about and thinking about what might be soon.xx
Keep me updated with how things are going.xxx


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## Savasanna

Oh yea - we struggled with the age range too, but we're a little more selective than it sounds like you are. We're planning on 0-6 months at this time so it was easier to make a selection. The only thing we're really staying away from right now are things that are ONLY for newborns - as they grow out of them quickly and we don't know if we'd be placed with one. 

We ended up with a Graco jogger. I'd like to get a smaller, lightweight one as well for crowded spaces - but that's not on the 'essentials' list so that can come later. The stroller we got is a stroller/car seat combo, which is convenient. I think the only big thing we're missing now is a crib.

So now we're in the process of decluttering and finishing up a few house projects that have been procrastinated before Friday. Our house is fine - but of course we're going to make sure it's in tip-top shape! Our worker sounds SUPER nice though so I'm not really too worried. 

I have to say - I'm so glad I found you! It's really nice to have a buddy during this process! Have you been telling people? How have the responses been? I think I'm going to start a journal on here to chronical this whole experience.


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## helloeveryone

Yes it's nice to have a buddy to share things with.
I have told a lot of people we are trying to foster, not many seem to surprised, I thought people would say haven't you got enough kids with 6 already but no people have been saying we will be perfect to foster..

Starting a diary is a good idea,it's nice to remember how much time things take.
My friend is having her interview today, it feels strange knowing people are talking about us.. But it feels good to be one more step forwards.

Are you still trying for a birth child as well ?

Because where we live they don't like us to be trying for a baby. But I feel done having my own babies..


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## helloeveryone

My friends meeting went well, just got asked questions like :
what are we like as parents ? 
How do we play and talk to our kids ?
How do they think we will manage with another child ?
Etc.....
Only another 5 more interviews to go....:happydance:


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## Savasanna

Wow! You need to have 6 in person reference interviews? And what do you mean "go to panel" - is that a personal interview for you (and your spouse? - I don't remember if you said you're married) We only needed three references. They each received a 4 page questionnaire in the mail with a bunch of questions about us. I don't know exactly what they were but I believe they were along the same lines as what your friends were asked. I'm really quite curious what Friday's meeting is going to be like. I've heard it's just detailed questions about your past/relationship/family/support structure. 

When is your panel scheduled for again? Hurray for 1 reference interview down! Are the other 5 scheduled for soon? 

I'm not sure where we stand on trying for a bio kid as well. I know we're going to give it another go, but then when is the question. We both are pretty burnt out from ttc for so long and have wracked up a huge amount of credit card debt from it. For now we're focusing on this foster process and our finances. Maybe we'll go for a try sometime this summer? Maybe not. Interesting that they put restrictions on that if you're an active foster parent. I'll have to ask to see if there are any regulations like that here.


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## helloeveryone

Going to panel means, we have about 10 people who all between them decide if we can foster or not. There is a social worker, foster carers, and all people who are involved somehow with fostering. We go to panel on 26th of February. ( So not long ,hopefully time will fly by.)

And I have just relised I only have another 4 more interviews left as I only needed 5 altogether. And they are set up for the next 2 two weeks.


I had a busy day today, but busy days are something I love.:happydance:


Sorry to hear about your troubles on trying to have a baby, I feel so lucky with my family, as I understand it doesn't always happen for some people.

Anyway better go now, speak soon.xx


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## Savasanna

Hey there - how's it going?


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## helloeveryone

Things here are good, we have another home visit Thursday, things are coming along nicely.

How about you? 
Haven't you got a home visit Friday?

Take care xx


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## helloeveryone

Things are still going well getting more and more excited about it all.
It's nice to know the end is near.
But hopefully soon the start of my fostering journey xx


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## Savasanna

I don't know how you do it. I feel like my process is draaaaaging and I know it hasn't actually been all that long! When are you hoping to be licensed by again?


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## helloeveryone

Time for me is dragging as well we phoned up back in May/June to try and foster.
It was then a few weeks then until someone came out to see us, then a month later we had a 6 week course to foster. In July we applied and things have slowly happened from there. We are hoping to be approved end of February . ( so not long now ). 
We feel ready for it now, the kids are ready for it. 
You sound like you might have a baby placed with you before me. 
You must be nervous and excited ?
Keep me update I'm always here for a chat and a moan ,take care xx


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## Savasanna

Hi there - anything new to report on your end? I'm kind of treating this thread like your journal, haha.


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## helloeveryone

It kind of feels like my journal, it's nice to keep this thread up dated so I can keep a eye on how long things have taken. 
Anyway nice to see you back here again, I am getting a bit excited now, we go to panel in 20 days ..and I am so ready to getting started, I have said this before but I feel like a foster carer, that hasn't got a foster child yet lol xxxx. Hope you are well...


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## helloeveryone

14 days until panel :)


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## Savasanna

yay! getting closer!


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## helloeveryone

12 days until panel.. Getting a little bit nervous and quite a lot excited..


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## helloeveryone

7 Days until we go to panel now :happydance:


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## Savasanna

Ack! One week!! 

I'm so curious what your panel will be like and how it compares to my home study. Hey - where abouts are you located (in general)? Just asking because someone else on here (who lives in the UK) mentioned they were thinking about fostering as well.


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## helloeveryone

6 Days to go, 
We live near Great Yarmouth in a nice area...
Finding it hard to sleep the last few weeks,, I am hoping it's a sign getting my body used to less sleep ready to get a placement soon !!
Trying to keep my self busy so time goes faster..


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## Savasanna

Is the panel the last thing you have to do before you're licensed?


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## helloeveryone

Hi very nearly I think our decision is down to a decision maker who then decides if we can or not foster we find out by letter but I think if panel and our social worker approves us then it is 99 percent that we will to approved...(I hope )
:happydance: getting excited now but I will be crushed if we don't get approved....


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## helloeveryone

5 days until panel :happydance::happydance:

I can't believe I started this thread back in sept 2013, here I am now 17 months later and I will hopefully find out if we can foster in 5 DAYS......

Glad my wait is coming to a end, I feel so ready to start my fostering journey....Let's just hope panel agree !!


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## helloeveryone

3 Days until panel :happydance::happydance:


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## Feff

Thinking of you! How exciting :happydance:


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## helloeveryone

Thanks feff xx


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## Savasanna

Ohhhh!! How oh so very exciting! I can't wait to hear how it all goes - you're so close! 

I'm sure you will do brilliantly, but I imagine it's hard to keep nerves at bay when you've been waiting for this moment for so long. 

!!! 3 days!


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## helloeveryone

Your certainly right getting really nervous here...
Think I might have a early night tonight, :sleep: I have been not sleeping very well this week and waking up early most days.


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## helloeveryone

Panel day tomorrow... 
I am hoping to update tomorrow with good news..


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## Savasanna

Ack! TOMORROW!!! :wohoo:


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## Lolly1985

Good luck! You'll be great :D


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## helloeveryone

Good news we are now foster carers :happydance: 
I'm soo happy,...
I will write about it another day, as I have to go out.


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## Savasanna

I wish there were and emoji of someone popping a bottle of champagne!


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## helloeveryone

Thought I would update how panel went, 
It went really well from the start and we walked in their and they said that ours was a positive report so well done, and that they only had a few questions for us.
Why did we want to foster?
Why is now the right time to foster?
What are we looking forwards to if we get excepted for fostering?
Another 2 but I can't remember them now.
Anyway we got told to leave them room, and they would all decide, then 5 minutes later we got called back in and got told everyone said yes to us being foster carers.
It was one of them many best days of my life, my 6 children being born is of course the best moments of my life.
Everyone is looking forwards to the call to say we have a placement for you...


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## helloeveryone

Still waiting for the phone to ring :telephone: 

Really looking to getting started....:happydance:


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## Mintastic

So happy you got approved. I know you have wanted this for so long. Can't wait 'til you get to bring home a new little (or big?) one!


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## helloeveryone

Mintastic said:


> So happy you got approved. I know you have wanted this for so long. Can't wait 'til you get to bring home a new little (or big?) one!

Thanks, yes it feels like we have been waiting a long time for this.

I started this thread back in September 2013....

I see you are 32 weeks pregnant congratulations, do you know if you are having a boy or girl? Not long to go...but I always found the last few weeks of pregnancy drag .....

Thanks again for stopping by....


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## Mintastic

Thanks! We are letting it be a surprise. 
Our dream family still includes fostering later on. We just need to move to a bigger place so that's the next step!


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## Savasanna

Hi, hun! Just popping by to see if there is any news yet!


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## helloeveryone

Thanks for stopping by but still no news...

Hope things are still going well for you.xx


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## helloeveryone

Mintastic said:


> Thanks! We are letting it be a surprise.
> Our dream family still includes fostering later on. We just need to move to a bigger place so that's the next step!

It's lovely you are having a surprise baby, all of my baby's have been surprise baby's, I feel it makes it more exciting...

And it's nice you still see fostering in your future, hopefully I might be still around and be able to offer you some advice about it all, In a few years or more....( And hopefully I am still enjoying fostering by then.) xxx


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## Mintastic

Thanks! 
I was going to say that we should exchange alternate contact info just in case. But I live in the US so it is probably pretty different. 

I do know that some policies are similar such as needing to have an extra room of a certain size. Which is sort of weird to me since there is no law stopping me from having a bio baby in a small space.


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## Savasanna

Hi Mint, 

I live in the US and just started fostering so I'm happy to offer up my experiences as well! Although I did learn that the regulations vary quite heavily from state to state so my experience may not be the same as yours. 

I know this is far down the road for you but just wanted to say hi. I wrote a bunch of my thoughts/feelings/experiences in my journal so you can always check that out if/when your time comes! 

Congrats on your surprise baby! What's your due date?


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## Mintastic

Thanks Savasanna! 
I'll try to check out your journal soon. I'm still interested in it even if it is far off for me. 
What state are you in? 
I am in NYC but looking at houses both upstate and in surrounding states also like CT and PA. Hopefully in the next two years. 
Looks like you got licenced pretty quickly! Congrats! 

Oh and I am due May 8. Getting close!


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## helloeveryone

Mintastic said:


> Thanks Savasanna!
> I'll try to check out your journal soon. I'm still interested in it even if it is far off for me.
> What state are you in?
> I am in NYC but looking at houses both upstate and in surrounding states also like CT and PA. Hopefully in the next two years.
> Looks like you got licenced pretty quickly! Congrats!
> 
> Oh and I am due May 8. Getting close!

Good luck with baby, xxx :happydance:


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## helloeveryone

Still waiting for 1st placement, getting a bit fed up with waiting and hoping the phone will ring.

I am So looking forwards to getting a call and coming on here and posting we have our 1st placement .

I know the phone will ring sometime soon, so excited to start ....


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## helloeveryone

We have had a call for our 1st foster baby, a three month old girl she turned up 3 days ago.
So far she is good,and settled as well as she could.
Loving being a mummy again,but this time I haven't got to worry about losing the baby weight.


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## Feff

That's lovely :) did they give you any info on how long she will be with you?


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## helloeveryone

Hi yes they said proberly at least 6 months.


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## helloeveryone

Just a little update as a lot has happened lately..
My 1st placement has returned home, a sad day as we grew very attached to her.
We were missing her so much then 2 days after we said goodbye to her, we get a phone call to ask if we could take 1 week old TWINS.........

We of course said yes and we are very tired but enjoying every minute of it. ( they have been here 2 weeks so far)


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## Savasanna

Aww - welcome to the twin party! Our girls are still with us.. however they may be going home soon. It's a very complicated story. In any event - good luck with your new adventure! Managing twins has been one of the most challenging experiences I've ever had.. but I'm so so in love with both of them.


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## helloeveryone

Savasanna said:


> Aww - welcome to the twin party! Our girls are still with us.. however they may be going home soon. It's a very complicated story. In any event - good luck with your new adventure! Managing twins has been one of the most challenging experiences I've ever had.. but I'm so so in love with both of them.

So lovely to hear from you, glad to hear things are going well for you.
I'm tired this morning,as soon as I got one feed and changed and back to bed the other one woke up.
They are good they love their sleep,but seem to sleep better in the daytime. ( need to change that round to the night times)

how old are your twins now?
Xx


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