# Feels like déjà vu :( frer not progressing



## 4077girl

I had a mc 2.5 years ago (it was kind of a "whoops"....I was one of those people I HATE now!!) I had a mc at 7 weeks but betas were low and slow from the beginning so I knew it was coming. Got pregnant on our first try after getting married (I was one of THOSE people that I ALSO hate) and it was the exact same scenario, tests not getting darker, low and slow betas, mc at 7 weeks. And now I feel like I'm back in the exact same boat with no control and it's just a crappy feeling. After my last mc we tried every month for the last 18 months and NOTHING. We did gonal-f and iui and femera and nothing. Finally we were ready to try Ivf but i thought it made sense to do one more iui with a different doctor before we shell out the money. Lo and behold it somehow worked! I got a positive at 10dpo (which I was afraid was the trigger, but my test was WAY darker 11dpo so I knew it was legit). Now today, 12 dpo my test is the exact se as yesterday. I know people always say that hpts aren't quantitative analyses but google it and you'll see that this "situation" almost always ends badly. I know there is nothing I can do, I'm already on progesterone and baby aspirin per my RE. It just doubly sucks this time because now we will have to wait 3 months before we can do Ivf with pgs instead of just one because my re makes you wait 3 months after a loss. I have betas scheduled for tomorrow, but I'm really havin a hard time being optimistic at this point. I don't even think i have a question I just wanted to vent.
 



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## Mrsmac02

Sorry for your losses and sorry you're not feeling very positive about this one. 

But - and I'm going to be one of those positive people I hate when you have a feeling inside you - the test lines is way darker than it was two days ago and isn't it the case that hcg doubles every 48 hours? 

I know that when you know, you know (if you see what I mean) because I just knew right at the beginning that things weren't good with my mc, but those lines are great for 12dpo. 

Don't lose hope! X


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## minties

I had bloods taken last Friday, took an FRER that day also (test line almost as dark as control). I took another test on Monday morning and it looked exactly the same as Fridays...test line and control the exact same. However I did a second beta on Tuesday and it went from 130 on Friday to 1100 on Tuesday, so a doubling time of 31.5 hours, despite no progress in tests from Friday to Monday.

I've never really noticed much difference in FRER from day to day. I know it's hard/impossible to stop testing when you've had a loss and you are freaking out, but it does NOT mean impending doom because an FRER was the same from one day to another . My FRER's were also like this with my pregnancy with my daughter.

Your tests are really dark too! My 12dpo was nowhere near that dark.


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## BunnyN

If there was 3 days between those tests I would be worried but only one day between I'm not sure it means much. I had squinters 8dpo morning and night, and 9dpo morning and then a faint but definite BFP in the afternoon and a much darker one that night, then not much difference for a couple of days but a glaring positive 14dpo. Hoping for the best for you.


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## 4077girl

Thanks your replies really are reassuring. I just want to badly for this pregnancy to work out and at the same time I'm so afraid to get my hope up because I feel like things aren't going "right" just like the other times.

Thanks so much!!!


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## Mrsmac02

:hugs: it's so hard to be positive after a mc. But if it's any consolation, I didn't even get a BFP til 14dpo with my mc and it was lighter than your 10dpo line! 

At the end of the days, the lines are no indication of what could happen so try (as hard as it is) to be optimistic and believe it'll be ok xx


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## 4077girl

Today's test didn't make me feel any better :(
 



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## BunnyN

Honestly it looks okay to me. 12dpo is darker than 11dpo and the control line looks a bit lighter on 13dpo which means that the test line is strong enough to start robbing dye from it. I think you might be expecting to see a bit too much of a difference in the lines in 24hrs, they can only change so much.


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## 4077girl

I hope you're right! My beta yesterday was 247 which I know is quite high for 13 dpo (and I'm positive of my dates cause it was iui/monitored). I'm wondering if maybe it was multiples and I lost one so the levels slowed down?? I guess I won't know anything until I get my second beta on Monday. I'm so nervous, I want so desperately for this to be my take home baby!


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## Lee82

HUGE hugs I am a test watcher as well!! Let us know!


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## justplay91

4077girl, I'm not TTCAAL, so I'm sorry if it seems like I'm butting in here because I know I don't understand what it's like... But I just wanted to say that your tests look great! Progression is best viewed if you look at tests taken 2 days apart... And yours look fantastic! They're definitely darker than mine were at 13 dpo, and I'm now 39 weeks pregnant. Best of luck, hon, and I really hope this is your rainbow baby!


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## bubbles82

I think your tests look fine, with FRERs I try to only test every 3 days as that seems the only way to see true progression with them, anything earlier than that just makes me worry as they're not likely to have changed much. 
Try not to worry, I know easier said than done as I get obsessive over tests too, but even with this pregnancy when I had perfect progression with the tests up until 6 weeks when they couldn't get any darker, I still ended up having a mmc, so they really don't mean anything and just cause more worry than anything!
Good luck and hope everything works out well for you x


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## 4077girl

I got my second beta result today and it was 713. Not great, but not a guaranteed miscarriage either. I hate this uncertainty I almost feel like I would have been happier if it had been way worse! I just want to get pregnant and have everything go "great" instead of whatever this is. And now it's been confirmed that if I do miscarry, I'll have to wait 3 months before I can do the if we had planned for December. I feel like I'm never going to get my baby. 


(My doubling time is 47 hours) yes I have read the 8 million websites that say "48-72 hours is good" but I've also spent hours reading medical journals and viable pregnancies are generally closer to a 30 hour doubling time in this beta range. I'm not saying there aren't exceptions....but I just wish I could be in the "healthy" range and have dramatically different lines on my tests and obvious symptoms and just not worry. It's so hard.

I also realize I'm being a pessimistic brat and I should be happy my betas are doubling at all and I got pregnant in the first place but I have only ever had losses so I think I just can't shake this negative attitude because if I let myself relax and be happy I'll be more disappointed when it goes bad than if I was miserable and expecting the worst anyways, in which case the miscarriage almost ends up being a relief because at least I know for sure.


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## bubbles82

All your feelings are totally normal after a loss. It's awful but I was the same, feeling relief at my two scans where my last two losses were confirmed, as I had a definite answer rather than the weeks of stress, not knowing what was going on and worrying so much. I hope things work out well for you, there's still a very good chance so I will keep very hopeful for you x


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## BunnyN

I felt a sense of relief after my scan too. Of course I would have given anything for a different result but at least I knew. Being in limbo is awful. 

Still hoping for the best for you but I dont blame you for finding it hard to be positive. Hugs


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## 4077girl

It doubled normally between 16 (713) and 18(1548) dpo and my progesterone is great (>60). I'm feeling more optimistic, but still not ready to get excited.


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## Mrsmac02

That's good news! Good luck, here's to happy and healthy nine months! X


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## BunnyN

Good news! I hope it continues to go well!


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