# Playpens - are they a big no-no for natural parents?



## colsy

Can't make my mind up about playpens. Yes, they're useful and give you some breathing space and give baby some safe playing space ... but I can't help thinking they remind me of putting an animal in a cage at the zoo. Which doesn't really fit with my more natural semi-attachment style of parenting. What do other natural parents think?


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## Shazzy-babee

would you like to be put in a cage?
i think they are a no no..


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## cabaretmum2b

I think that it is essentially your choice, as you know your baby well and you know how you'd use it. Personally, I don't like the idea of playpens because they are prety "cagey", but I can see the appeal in them to some people, and I think that if you're in the same room, tidying up for example, and baby is HAPPY to be in one for a little bit, then I don't see the problem, as long as you're not just leaving them alone in it for ages when they don't really want to be there. If you're just keeping them safe in the same room as you while you get on with things, then I do think they can be ok.
Honestly, I think you should go with your instinct on it. The thing with parenting is that it is about your choice, and everyone's different. Just because some people don't agree with it, doesn't mean it will or won't be the best thing for you.


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## kglo

I have not found playpens useful with either of my boys, they cried from the moment they get put in. 

I found a door hanger thingy rather good, both mine loved it and they get to exercise their little legs.


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## Rachel_C

I hate playpens but have found no alternative but to get one. We live in a very small flat where the living space is living room and dining room combined with an open arch way into the kitchen. We have so much stuff packed in that there is no way I can keep LO safe without somewhere enclosed to put her. I hate putting her in there but she doesn't mind (she currently loves pulling herself up on the bars and giggling through them) and I only use it when I need to do something where I can't be right next to her. I found it a lifesaver the other day when I dropped a full glass of Coke onto her jumperoo. It bounced off it, hit a table leg and smashed. Her jumperoo, play mat, changing mat, the wooden floor and the rug were all covered in coke and shards of glass. She wouldn't let me put her down in her cot in the bedroom but she was happy to watch me from her playpen which thankfully avoided the mess. Without it, well we would still have glass and coke everywhere! 

To be honest, I don't think it's helpful to pigeon-hole different things into 'natural' or 'unnatural'. I read somewhere that early humans used to swaddle their baby, wrap them up in a kind of baby sling and hang them up from a tree while they went off to hunt etc. I think I'd prefer a playpen to that, but they were as natural as you could get really! When I first realised we needed a playpen I fought against the idea for a long time, but eventually I realised that what is 'natural' or attachment parenting is what feels right to you instinctually and keeps baby happy. They're not for everybody but in our case, somewhere safe to put LO where she can be happy is as natural as it gets really. I still hate the way it looks so I'm currently coming up with ideas to decorate it and make it look more friendly.


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## leighbaby

I think they'd be useful for the times when you have to run out to collect in the washing from the line when it is raining type scenarios, but I don't like the idea of them for anything more than that. 

If i'm desperate and it is raining - I put LO in his cot and RUN!

ETA: they remind of the old cartoons of the rugrats - and the babies getting up to big old adventures!


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## xxxjacxxx

I have one. Well I actually have two joined together...I got 2 of the soft sided babydans and joined them to make one large one. Its sat at the top of our living room full of his toys. 
9 times out of ten he comes and goes, I only shut the gate when I need to go peg out washing/put it away or need the loo and he's back out again.
Invaluable piece of kit for me:thumbup:


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## leighbaby

Rachel_C said:


> I hate playpens but have found no alternative but to get one. We live in a very small flat where the living space is living room and dining room combined with an open arch way into the kitchen. We have so much stuff packed in that there is no way I can keep LO safe without somewhere enclosed to put her. I hate putting her in there but she doesn't mind (she currently loves pulling herself up on the bars and giggling through them) and I only use it when I need to do something where I can't be right next to her. I found it a lifesaver the other day when I dropped a full glass of Coke onto her jumperoo. It bounced off it, hit a table leg and smashed. Her jumperoo, play mat, changing mat, the wooden floor and the rug were all covered in coke and shards of glass. She wouldn't let me put her down in her cot in the bedroom but she was happy to watch me from her playpen which thankfully avoided the mess. Without it, well we would still have glass and coke everywhere!
> 
> To be honest, I don't think it's helpful to pigeon-hole different things into 'natural' or 'unnatural'. I read somewhere that *early humans used to swaddle their baby, wrap them up in a kind of baby sling and hang them up *from a tree while they went off to hunt etc. I think I'd prefer a playpen to that, but they were as natural as you could get really! When I first realised we needed a playpen I fought against the idea for a long time, but eventually I realised that what is 'natural' or attachment parenting is what feels right to you instinctually and keeps baby happy. They're not for everybody but in our case, somewhere safe to put LO where she can be happy is as natural as it gets really. I still hate the way it looks so I'm currently coming up with ideas to decorate it and make it look more friendly.

some cultures still do this :)


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## colsy

xxxjacxxx said:


> I have one. Well I actually have two joined together...I got 2 of the soft sided babydans and joined them to make one large one. Its sat at the top of our living room full of his toys.
> 9 times out of ten he comes and goes, I only shut the gate when I need to go peg out washing/put it away or need the loo and he's back out again.
> Invaluable piece of kit for me:thumbup:

xxxJacxxx, the soft sided babydan sounds interesting. Any chance you can give me a web link?


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## xxxjacxxx

OMG just imagine hanging Leo from the conifer in our back garden whilst I collected the washing :rofl::blush:


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## xxxjacxxx

colsy said:


> xxxjacxxx said:
> 
> 
> I have one. Well I actually have two joined together...I got 2 of the soft sided babydans and joined them to make one large one. Its sat at the top of our living room full of his toys.
> 9 times out of ten he comes and goes, I only shut the gate when I need to go peg out washing/put it away or need the loo and he's back out again.
> Invaluable piece of kit for me:thumbup:
> 
> xxxJacxxx, the soft sided babydan sounds interesting. Any chance you can give me a web link?Click to expand...

Here you go, these are the ones. I got two 2nd hand off ebay...
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Babydan-Babyden-Lite-blue-silver/dp/B000NUWGDG

Here's Leo's playpen:
https://i819.photobucket.com/albums/zz112/SiggyStoreUK/nappies/IMG_5110.jpg

:thumbup:


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## colsy

xxxjackxx, thanks so much for the picture and the link. Your photo shows exactly the idea I've had in my head for ages about a little area I'd like to set up. It's somewhere safe that I can shut if I leave the room, but most of the time I could leave safely unlocked. Also, you've got the solution to my flooring issues as well (see my post re hard floors in the Baby Club section earlier today). All in all, you've done me an amazing service so big big thanks. Can't wait to show OH this photo so we can get planning! :thumbup::happydance:


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## xxxjacxxx

Glad to help!

Its perfect for Leo as he doesn't associate being locked in it and will happily sit and play in there, the only downside is he likes to shut the dog in there with him and terrorise it:dohh:
:rofl:
:thumbup:


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## Mary Jo

Rachel_C, your situation is mine, almost exactly, and when Adam became really mobile we had no option but to get something. We ended up with a travel cot. He has some toys in there that stay there, and he loves pulling up and playing peekaboo... the first week or so he didn't like it but now he will play very happily, especially when he's tired. And it is absolutely essential to me, because if I am cooking I cannot have him roaming around trying to get into the hot oven. :dohh: Wearing him all the time is not an option for me, I find it far too tiring the size he is now, even if he liked it, which he doesn't - he has a limited tolerance for it. 

It is 100% a safety issue for us because of not having a separate kitchen, or for times when I simply have to leave him in the room alone for a short period. I never stick him in there at other times, apart from when I was trying to get him used to it so he'd not fuss when I *had* to put him there. If I could get away with just having safety gates I would, but that's not our set-up.


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## littlestar

i was given a playpen we use the padded base it came with as a playmat, and the bars will eventually be put together to act as a room divider across the front of all hubbys expensive home cinema stuff.

the babydan looks good - we would consider something that size when he's up and about as we have hard flooring across the whole ground floor of the house.


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## ellie

can i just say that looks fantastic!
i had been thinking about this, K isnt mobile yet but when he is i know he will be into everything and we have a totally open plan kitchen/dining room, it just wont be safe for him. we can gate the kitchen off but then he will be 'locked out' of it if i am doing something in there, plus thats the biggest and most suitable area for him to have a play area (in teh dining room bit) as our living room isnt very big. 
I hadnt thought he would tolerate a play pen and im not keen on them per se, but i guess used creatively and flexibly they can be really good?


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## aob1013

I think whether you are a 'natural parent' or not, it is irrelevant. If you want one hun, go for it. They won't do LO any damage x


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## Lisa1302

I think it depends on how they are being used.

I had a HUGE one here, we have a very large front room and the wooden pen was really big (probably another section bigger than Jacs above) - it meant I could leave her play and not worry the dogs could lick her to death etc

She has a normal size one at my parents house, the other day they had it out on the veranda with foam mats and cushions and she was happy as larry and completely safe - she even dropped off for a little nap

She doesnt have the pen at our house now with her walking crawling around etc, instead I use the sections to stop her getting out of the front room


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## BlackBerry25

I'm not a natural parent, but I just wanted to say I have a 20 month old and I never used my playpen. It just sits out in the garage. So it can be done without :) I only used mine for H to have a nap when visiting at other peoples houses.


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## whiby

We have one, we don't use it all the time but as others have said it's useful for popping to the loo, when the oven is on and I want to make sure he can't get to the kitchen etc (another open plan house here!)

To be honest as long as the baby isn't in there all the time and is happy to play in it I don't see that they are any worse then jumperoos and other similar devices which entertain your child, and no more cage-like than a stair gate would be to keep them safe. I certainly wouldn't class it as "unnatural" parenting to use one


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## Vici

Jac i love yours (or Leos :rofl:). We are all open plan and cooking is a nightmare now as i'm so scared she's gonna get to the oven. hats often her jumperoo time but an area with toys is fab :) I def don't think whether you consider yourself "natural" comes in to it - its whatever works for you in your situation xx


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## Jetters

Vici said:


> I def don't think whether you consider yourself "natural" comes in to it - its whatever works for you in your situation xx

This- through and through. 

:flower:

And I don't think they're cage-like, how are they any more restrictive than a Jumperoo or a pram or a sling?! Fill it up with toys, leave the gate open most of the time and they'll just see it as a place of fun.


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## OmiOmen

Wow Jac, that is more like a playroom!

Like some of the others have said I think it is what works best for you. I don't think useing a playpen is going against natural parenting at all and even things that do go against natural parenting to some degree (useing disposable nappies for example) are fine if it works for the individual family anyway.


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## mommyof3co

I don't think they are as common here. We have play yards but they are mostly used for napping, especially in newborn stage. Not so much put in there to play. I don't really like the idea of it, like some others said, too much like a cage for me. But again we didn't use a crib with Hayden for the same reason, he just coslept until he was ready for a regular bed. I would rather just have a safe place in my sights while I clean and let them play there


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## Jetters

^ and if you didn't have a safe place in your flat? Or had a open plan flat- what then?


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## bky

I don't like the idea that it's a 'natural parenting no-no'. Or really that anything is.:nope: I think they are situationaly fine. I have dogs and a playpen will be invaluable for me sometimes.


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## mommyof3co

Jetters said:


> ^ and if you didn't have a safe place in your flat? Or had a open plan flat- what then?

I don't know, we've never really baby proofed or anything with the boys so by safe I really mean clean spot on a blanket with their toys or something. I would put them in my sights so if I was doing the dishes I could keep an eye on them to be sure they weren't getting into anything. The times I would be in and out of rooms a lot that's when I'd put him on my back in his carrier. I'm ok with gates though, so you can divide a spot that's safer for them, even those big gates that you link a few of them together...I just like that better than a pretty small enclosed space with the tall sides and mesh sides that they really can't see out that well. 

I'm not putting down anyone using them, I just prefer not to and didn't :thumbup:


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## Mervs Mum

I couldnt be without mine :) Hebe goes in there and shuts the door behind herself :lol:

But having 2 so close it helps. I use it like Jac and if I need to see to Sid and want her in one place for 5 mins.

I dont think there are any 'no no's.....does it HAVE to be all or nothing? I gave birth at home, intend to BF for a year again, BLW, co-sleep and use cloth this time but not all of these with all my children.....there are plenty of parents who probably are more 'eco' or 'green' or 'natural' than me who dont home birth or BF or any of the other associated 'natural' things.....it's just horses for courses surely :shrug:


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## xxxjacxxx

Agree with Lisa here.

I co-slept in the beginning, I FF, I baby wore, I cloth bummed....then I switched to sposies, put him in his cot, fed him puree from a spoon....now I just use cloth...he eats himself, and I use a playpen! 

I do what is right for me, like others do for them....what is the definition of a 'natural mama'? :shrug:


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## cleckner04

I personally don't like them but I'm the same way with the crib as well. Putting Emma in her crib just makes me feel like I'm putting her in a cage. Hence, the co-sleeping. :D I refuse to put my dog in a cage or crate so its similar to me with Emma. 

Although, xxxjacxxx, I've never seen one so nice! Your play area is pretty cool. I probably still couldn't do it but that's definitely the best idea IMO if I had to confine Emma to one spot. 

When it comes to cooking, etc. I can pretty much do anything one handed. I hold her half of the time and when I'm not holding her she is playing on the floor. I give her pots and pans, a spoon and let her bang away! :thumbup:


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## Vici

hats the difference of a diddy baby Cleck - try holding Imi for more than 2 mins and your arm feels like its about to fall off :rofl:


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## mommyof3co

I agree that this doesn't have an impact on how 'natural' you are, it's preference, I prefer not to, some think it's best for their situation so whatever works best for you. I think the term 'natural' might make people feel bad if it would tech go against it. To me there are things that fall under natural parenting...AP, cloth diapering, home birth, birth without drugs in a hospital too, BLW, BF and so on. Doesn't mean you aren't natural if you don't follow them 100%, you do what comes naturally do you as a parent. I have changed so much from Landon to Hayden. And will even more with the next I'm sure. I BF until self wean, cloth diaper, cosleep, babywear, no cio, ap, try to cook from scratch organic (mostly) meals and snacks for the kids....but we circ'd our boys, i had a csection with one and epi with the other two (plan to homebirth the next), Hayden is currently in a mix of cloth and sposie pull ups, we didn't do BLW and I also use a stroller a lot too because of my hips. I don't feel any less 'natural' because of anything I do that doesn't fall under the 'natural description', we do what works best for our family to make for happy parents and happy well adjusted kids.


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## mommyof3co

Jac just seeing the picture of yours-that I love!!! I wouldn't mind setting something like that up if it was needed in the home we are in. When I think playpen I think the small ones that they can also sleep in, travel play yard things, where they really can't move around much in thee....that I personally don't want to use.


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## cleckner04

Vici said:


> hats the difference of a diddy baby Cleck - try holding Imi for more than 2 mins and your arm feels like its about to fall off :rofl:

:rofl: Well Emma is starting to get harder to hold but I have some pretty strong arms. I walk around half the time feeding her in one arm and cleaning with the other. :dohh: The drawback of having a clusterfeeder but it's a good thing I have man arms. :rofl::rofl:


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## tinkerbellkir

Weve never bothered but im not against them either. For babies safety sometimes things we dont like too much can be neccessary. I think if they are used when you cant be right there next to baby then they are fine. I woulnt like to hear of someone using them all the time to put baby in so they could just sit on their arse and not have to play with or watch baby and i think its important to have them roaming free to learn what they can and cant do and touch, if they were put in a playpen always then let out when they were ol enough to get out/undo the gate it'd be hell as theyd want their hands on everything and to go everywhere, i like to teach them as we go what we can/cant do in the house x


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## Vici

xxxjacxxx said:


> colsy said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> xxxjacxxx said:
> 
> 
> I have one. Well I actually have two joined together...I got 2 of the soft sided babydans and joined them to make one large one. Its sat at the top of our living room full of his toys.
> 9 times out of ten he comes and goes, I only shut the gate when I need to go peg out washing/put it away or need the loo and he's back out again.
> Invaluable piece of kit for me:thumbup:
> 
> xxxJacxxx, the soft sided babydan sounds interesting. Any chance you can give me a web link?Click to expand...
> 
> Here you go, these are the ones. I got two 2nd hand off ebay...
> https://www.amazon.co.uk/Babydan-Babyden-Lite-blue-silver/dp/B000NUWGDG
> 
> Here's Leo's playpen:
> https://i819.photobucket.com/albums/zz112/SiggyStoreUK/nappies/IMG_5110.jpg
> 
> :thumbup:Click to expand...

Jac, can you do me a massive favour? Iiiii wondered if you could measure how long and wide Leo's playpen is? I assume thats 2 whole play pens and you just haven't used all the bits? x


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## colsy

Vici said:


> Jac, can you do me a massive favour? Iiiii wondered if you could measure how long and wide Leo's playpen is? I assume thats 2 whole play pens and you just haven't used all the bits? x

Was going to ask the exact same Q!


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## Vici

lol, i showed my OH and he wants that playpen for Imi, just gotta rearrange the front room!!


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## Mervs Mum

I've decided I want to join another to my existing one now! :lol:


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## princessellie

i have a travel cot full of leyla's toys that she goes into if i need my arms free, she hates it with a passion but sometimes its gotta be done, id love to be able to carry her everywhere but now that im 7months pregnant, and considering we've just moved so the house is still trying to get done, its just not gna happen lol

x


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