# New and wanted to share my story



## jennajul2001

Hi ,

I have a 10 yr old daughter and since she was born we have not been trying but have not been preventing either. We just figured we were only meant to have one baby. 

We found out we were expecting in May and we were very excited and surprised, after all this time. I was a little scared and apprehensive that something would happen but was staying positive and started getting excited at the thought of a new baby. 

I hadnt had any spotting or bleeding throughout my pregnancy and was very happy about that, I didnt have morning sickness but a few times (only 1 time with my dd) so that was a bit different. On Friday the 12th of August I woke up to get ready for work and had to go to the bathroom. When I went I felt pressure but didnt think anything of it, I had no pain or anything. I finished getting ready and left for work.

I was at work an hour and had to go to the bathroom when I found blood in my underwear, I started crying, I was sooo scared somethng was going wrong. I called my doctor but his office was closed, so I went straight to the ER. They took blood, and the dr checked with the doppler for a heartbeat and found it. Everything was ok I thought I had stopped bleeding , then I went to the bathrom adn there was even more blood. They checked me and did an ultrasound and they came in and told my they had bad news. My cervix was open and my membranes were bulging out. I was devastated. They said there was not much they could do. 

They wanted to admit me but I said no, I would come back tomorrow to see my obgyn and see what he wanted to do. I went home and stayed in bed with my butt up til the next day. I went in to see my ob first thing in the morning, he said there was pretty much nothing he could do since I was so early. 

He said the baby was healthy and my dates were all right, but he didn't know why this had happened when I had had a healthy pregnancy previously. He gave me two options,1 - to terminate the pregnancy or 2- to try and go on bedrest for another 2 to 3 weeks and to come back and see if the water had gone back in . I chose to go on bedrest and went home. He told me I may pass the baby aat home and tried to prepare me for that. 

I lasted 1 day on bedrest, the next day I had contraction type pains and started bleeding again. I was terrified I would pass my baby at home. I didnt want to experience that at home. The pains went away and I thought I was ok. But by that night they started again, stronger and I was bleeding now heavy. I got my dh to rush me to the ER right away. I was terrified but I was still hoping for the best. 

They took me right away as I had started bleeding through my clothes. They did an internal and did an ultrasound and said the baby was gone, there was no longer a heartbeat. I was devastated. I was admitted and told my dr would come see me the next day and they would do another US to see what was going on.

As soon as I got to my room my dr came in and wanted to check me and told me what he thought had happened, He said he thought the baby may have moved into the part of the bag that was bulging and when he checked he said thats what had happened. He had to break my water but i did not have any contractions right away. He gave me some medicine to contract and I passed my baby shortly after. I was devastated, i could not stop crying. I chose not to see my baby and i regret that every day, my dh did se him though. We were told it was a boy.

The placenta wouldnt come out so I had to have a d&c, which I had 8 hours after the birth of my poor baby. I was sent home the same day.

I still wonder every day if someone would have checked me earlier if my baby boy would still be in my tummy. I am struggling every day and wanted to share my story.


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## Blondie007

I am so sorry for the loss of your little boy xx :hugs: :hugs:

No one should ever have to go through anything like this

Lots of love and hugs to you and your family xx


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## BabyJayne

:hugs: :hugs:


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## Jox

I am so very sorry for your loss of your baby boy :hugs: Have you given him a name? xxx


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## SarahJane

I am so sorry for your loss, I hope the coming day, weeks and months are kind to you.:hugs:


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## angel jayvian

Im so sorry huns. I lost my first baby due to bulging membrane 4 weeks ago and I ask myself the same question. why the doctors don't explain that this is a possibility. Maybe if they would check for this my baby boy would still be in my tummy:(..


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## Andypanda6570

:cry::cry::cry: I am so deeply sorry. I lost my Ava at 18 weeks, I gave birth to her in my bathroom, she was already gone :cry::cry: I know this pain is just so horrible and sadness nobody could ever imagine this sadness :cry::cry::cry:
If you ever need to talk I am always around. XOXOOX I am so so sorry :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## jennajul2001

Thank you so very much everyone, I am trying to move past this, but I know I will never forget him.

Jox, we did not give him a name but when we were pregnant we tossed around the name Christopher for a boy, so I think if we did it would have been Christopher. If I get pregnant with another boy I could not use the name as it would have been his allready.

angel jayvian, I think about it everyday I didnt have an internal check until I was in the er but I had an ob apt 2 days before I ended up in the ER. If my dr would have checked me I wonder if things would be different. It is a horrible thing to have to live with. And I am so sorry for your loss :hugs:

Andypanda6570. i am so sorry for your loss as well :hugs:, it is a very terrible thing to go through, I just hope we dont have to go through anything like this again, I dont know if I could handle it happening again.


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## sun

So sorry for your devastating loss :( Lots of hugs to you and family :hugs:


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## Andypanda6570

jennajul2001 said:


> Thank you so very much everyone, I am trying to move past this, but I know I will never forget him.
> 
> Jox, we did not give him a name but when we were pregnant we tossed around the name Christopher for a boy, so I think if we did it would have been Christopher. If I get pregnant with another boy I could not use the name as it would have been his allready.
> 
> angel jayvian, I think about it everyday I didnt have an internal check until I was in the er but I had an ob apt 2 days before I ended up in the ER. If my dr would have checked me I wonder if things would be different. It is a horrible thing to have to live with. And I am so sorry for your loss :hugs:
> 
> Andypanda6570. i am so sorry for your loss as well :hugs:, it is a very terrible thing to go through, I just hope we dont have to go through anything like this again, I dont know if I could handle it happening again.

I don't think I could handle it either if it ever happened again, I really don't think I would make it :cry::cry::cry::cry: xoxoxoox


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## angel jayvian

jennajul2001 said:


> Thank you so very much everyone, I am trying to move past this, but I know I will never forget him.
> 
> Jox, we did not give him a name but when we were pregnant we tossed around the name Christopher for a boy, so I think if we did it would have been Christopher. If I get pregnant with another boy I could not use the name as it would have been his allready.
> 
> angel jayvian, I think about it everyday I didnt have an internal check until I was in the er but I had an ob apt 2 days before I ended up in the ER. If my dr would have checked me I wonder if things would be different. It is a horrible thing to have to live with. And I am so sorry for your loss :hugs:
> 
> Andypanda6570. i am so sorry for your loss as well :hugs:, it is a very terrible thing to go through, I just hope we dont have to go through anything like this again, I dont know if I could handle it happening again.

Yes it is horrible to think what if ? :( ..i still can't believe her is not here with me.


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## Hotbump

:hugs:


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## Nikki_d72

I'm so sorry for your loss, it's so unfair. I lost my twins at 20wks, nearly 4 weeks ago due to ruptured membranes but I'm pretty sure it was due to a similar thing to you - reading about it now I had a few signs of cervical dilation (silent), like you I had normal 1st pregnancy with an 8yr gap. I have a follow-up appointment on 15th Sept. if I find out anything I'll update you all, but no-one seems to know why this happens, the what-ifs are terrible. I feel for you, I wish this never had to happen to anyone. 

Wishing you gentle days ahead xxxx


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## mummylove

I am so sorry hun my thoughts are with u


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## jennajul2001

Nikki_d72 said:


> I'm so sorry for your loss, it's so unfair. I lost my twins at 20wks, nearly 4 weeks ago due to ruptured membranes but I'm pretty sure it was due to a similar thing to you - reading about it now I had a few signs of cervical dilation (silent), like you I had normal 1st pregnancy with an 8yr gap. I have a follow-up appointment on 15th Sept. if I find out anything I'll update you all, but no-one seems to know why this happens, the what-ifs are terrible. I feel for you, I wish this never had to happen to anyone.
> 
> Wishing you gentle days ahead xxxx

I am so sorry for your losses :hugs::hugs:. It is so hard. I hope I get answers at my follow up but I just want to ttc right away, although it wont replace my lost babyboy i feel like it will help me move on. I struggle daily with the what ifs but I feel like I am getting better a little bit every day.


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## xSamanthax

I am so so sorry for your loss hun :hugs:


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## DueSeptember

*I am Sorry   How far along were you? I was 23 weeks when my water broke and I had my baby girl at 24 weeks*


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## jennajul2001

DueSeptember said:


> *I am Sorry   How far along were you? I was 23 weeks when my water broke and I had my baby girl at 24 weeks*

Thank you so much and I am so sorry to hear about your loss also. :hugs: . I was 16 weeks.


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## jennijunni

I am so, so sorry. It is so sad to lose a baby. I find it better to play the "what if" game. I know that is easier said than done, but I think it just makes us sadder, and we cannot dig out of that pit. You will always remember your sweet baby boy, and he will live in your heart forever. Lots of hugs and prayers.


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## lorraine137

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my little boy at 16 weeks due to a ruptured membrane too, and still can't get any answers from the hospital. The pregnancy was going really well and my water just broke out of the blue. It would have been my due date tomorrow and can't believe how my emotions are right now. It doesn't help that people around me are announcing pregnancies right, left and centre.

But hopefully one day we will all get our dream of becoming parents. Lets not give up hope x


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## jennajul2001

Thank you so much everyone, I have my harder days and my easier ones.:hugs:


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## MariskaG

I am so sorry for your loss. I cant imagine how difficult it must have been.


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