# Anyone struggling to get pregnant after a miscarriage?



## susan_1981

Me and my husband started TTC last August after I came off the pill. I fell pregnant in the October and was obviously over the moon. I didn't have many symptoms apart from sore boobs and the occasional bought of morning sickness, although I reckon I possibly imagined it half the time. The was only one time I was actually sick. My husband was cooking me a bacon sandwich and the smell made me throw up! 

Anyway, went for my 12 week scan on 23 December and found out I'd had a missed miscarriage as the baby was only measuring 7+2. We started trying again at the end of January and, 9 cycles later, I'm still not pregnant. I seem to be ovluating according to OPKs and Fertility Friend so I don't think that's the problem. Just wondered if anyone else is struggling after a miscarriage?


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## patboy

Hi Susan
I'm the same as you...went for my 12 week scan dec 29 and the baby had stopped growing at 10 1/2 weeks. Devastated.

I have been trying since Jan also with OPKs, CBFM, and notta!! Thank god over this process i had been on a private waiting list for IVF which I should start as soon as AF arrives this month.

Are you having crazy cycles since M/C? I have had one 48 day cycle (normally 29/30) and now on CD 50 and no sign of AF, needless to say I wish it would arrive so I can get moving forward for the IVF. 

Wishing you the best of luck!


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## shalagirl

Hi Susan - It's hard to know what to say to someone trying each month and nothing happens even when you have been there too. I started ttc in Jan 08 got pregnancy in June 08 but had an early loss at six weeks. Started trying again in Sept 08 and by Dec 08 my head was totally put away with all this trying and no success. I was tempting and using my CBFM and seemed to be ovulating but nothing was happening. I went to the docs totally stressed so he arranged for my DH and I to have some tests. They did take a few months and I also got to see a gynocologist. All the results were coming back fine then in Jun 09 nearly a year later I got pregnant...and unfortunately had a miscarriage 2 weeks ago at 12 weeks...anyway...


Around May time when we were having tests a sperm test showed something may be wrong on my DH's side (a later test showed things were grand). However the relief I felt at the _problem _not being with me was amazing. When the doc told us the 2nd sperm test was fine I was in shock and sure he had got it wrong. My midwife also suggested just having the tests and meeting with the gynocologyist maybe was enough to _relax_ me and help me get pregnant. 

From Dec 08 to till I got pregnant again I had taken steps to stop me stressing over ttc - I had reflexology every few weeks (although I didn't enjoy it that much), I didn't come on BnB so much, I tried to take more time for myself like lying in bed lots at the weekend reading and I had a 12 week gym membership I tried to make the most off.

Maybe you could go to you doc for some advice and ask for some tests. Tests and gyno appointments do take a while so it may be worth getting the ball rolling. Now I've had this 2nd miscarriage and I really going to look at my vitamin and mineral intake and really try and eat healthy and cut back on cafffine. For me the only way I try to help the months go by is by trying to do something pos+ that may help me get pregnant be that tempting, trying to loss abit weight or rethinking my diet. 

I hope soon your wait will be over, in the mean time it is hard when the months keep rolling on. Be strong as you can be. Wishing you all the best. :hug:


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## tansey

I had to wait 16cycles before I got my BFP after my 1st MC butunfortunately I MC'd at 7weeks and am now having tests.


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## T'elle

Hi hun i have too :( we miscarried twins in Sept 2006 and since then we have struggled to catch pregnant we believe we have had 2 more miscarriages since then as we got :bfp:'s but after a few days i started to bleed, so we really dont know what is going on. We have both been tested for almost everything and hubs SA was normal, and IVF wales did tests which all come back fine and they said unexplained infertility, but refused treatment as according to their policy i am too young and they only give treatment if your over 23. So stuck in limbo and we were going to WTT but we have now had a chat and started trying again as we are so desperate and devastated we have another 2 years of not knowing weather we are coming or going and still cant get help yet.

I really wish you all the best in your journey for your :bfp: xxx


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## susan_1981

Thanks girls and sorry for your losses. Well my cycles have been pretty regular since. They vary from 26 to 28 days every month so no problem there. I'm almost certain I ov as I get the cramps and, as I said above, fertility friend says I do and so do OPKs. The only problem I have noticed is my luteal phase. That seemed to have shortened. It used to always be 13 days exactly (although saying that, I only did that for 2 months and then I fell pregnant) then when I miscarried, I was still having a LP of 13 days but about 3 months after MC, it started getting shorter and shorter, one month I started spotting at 8dpo. So I started taking vitamin B-50 complex and that seems to have worked.

I went away this month for a week and I'm pretty sure I ov'd on the day we got there, only because I had the cramps. I didn't temp and I didn't use OPKs so I felt a lot more relaxed. I know I need to work on my smoking. When I go to the doctors, I know that's the first thing they will say but I'm planning on giving up starting tomorrow. If I struggle, then I'll get myself some nicotine gum/patches to help but I don't think I'll need that as when I was pregnant before, I managed to give up just like that, without any problems.

I keep saying that the problem is with me, the fact is it could be a problem with my husband. But he did get me pregnant once so I'm sure it's possible for him to do it again, even if he does have a problem. I'm pretty sure it's me though and luteal phase related. But my last 2 cycles have seemed more normal. I haven't been spotting for days on end before AF actually arrives. It's literally been for a day before so that's a vast improvement.

I will book a doctors appointment and will update with any news. I'd imagine they'd probably want to test my husband before they go any further with me - although not sure, that's just the impression I get from other girls on here.

I've had reflexology for the past 2 months though and it's definitely relaxing. She said that every part of my body is tense and the only part that was fine wast my ovaries, uterus and fallopian tubes. Don't know whether I believe in it or not but it seems to make sense. She was saying things to me that I wondered how she could tell from my foot. Like she asked me if I'd recently suffered from neck pain, which I had and also if I had problems with my sinuses, which I often do! So going to go back for some more sessions xxx


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## shalagirl

Hi again Susan - was interested to hear you have had reflexology too. I did find having my feet rubbed for the hour relaxing and I was nealy always asleep by the end of the hour. My reflexologist was lovely and listened to all of my ttc journey and discussed how not being about to relax can run in your family. My mum is always tidying and fussing about. She will stay up to 1am in the morning baking etc! and I feel to some degree I have inherited this. Reflexology really made me think about my daily habits and why I don't feel relaxed the majority of the day. 

My reflexologist encouraged me to alter my lifestyle so I made time to relax. One of the things that came to may attention at that time was how in work I often would say to my work collagues _sure never worry_ - what I really meant was _don't you worry I'll sort that problem out_ so I made a real effort not to say those words to anyone anymore. 

My reflexlogist too could tell things about me from touching my feet. She asked was my digestive system sluggish and it had been as I had been on hols and hadn't been eating my normal diet. Also she asked had I had backache and I had had alittle which I put down to sitting on child size chairs in work which were not made for adults! I do think there is something in being able to pin point ailments from your feet - different parts of the sole & ankle correspond to differnet parts of the body.

Although I enjoyed reflexology a few days before I was due to do I would get an apprehensive feeling and that evening (I normally had morning sessions) I would feel quiet flat. I don't know if it was because I expected too much from it like it would wondrously make me feel amazing!!! 

In all I gave it 12 sessions and at £30 a go that adds up. I would consider acupuncture now as an alternative. Reflexology is worth trying but I wouldn't pin your hopes on it totally to get that BFP.


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## jonnanne3

We have been TTC since May 2007 after a tubal reversal. We found out we were pregnant the first time in Feb 2008, but unfortunately lost our precious baby in March 2008 at 6wk 5 days. We did get pregnant again in June 2008, but sadly we lost that precious baby too in July 2008. We got pregnant again sometime Sept/Oct but didn't know we were even pregnant until CD 8!!!! Yes I said CD 8! I had my HCG levels checked and they were rising! We were pregnant again! Sadly we lost that precious baby a couple of weeks later. We didn't know how far along I was due to my cycle being messed up. So the last pregnancy was October 2008 with not even a hint of a :bfp: I have been to a FS and he said that there really wasn't much he could do as we have been getting pregnant. My gyn has told me to take progesterone. I have had test after test after test and everything is great. So I am in the same boat and I completely feel your pain. I hope and pray that we all get our much deserved :bfp: and beautiful babies!!!!!!


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## D&D

Dear Susan,

Same here: I got pregnant last October, but during the first check-up (at 10 weeks), it turned out that the baby has stopped developing :cry:
Since January we have been trying to conceive, but nadda. It is driving me nuts, I have a short luteal phase as well, and I think I have tried everything now: fertility teas, vitex agnus, evening primrose, acupuncture, vitamine B6.

I know I stress too much, I am trying to work on that as well (hence acupuncture). Thing is that we are in the midst of a huge house renovation, that is long overdue, that does not help. Also, everybody around me (7) seems to be pregnant, which is adding to the pressure. I am wanting a baby brother/sister for my daughter so much (I know I am so blessed to have her, so I sometimes think I am such a spoiled brat for complaining about not succeeding to to get pregnant for the second time around). And I hear my biological clock ticking (turning 38 soon)

I was actually rather convinced that I conceived last month, but I just got my period today. I am starting BBT again, I was not doing that for a while to get my mind of things.

Hang in there and try to stay positive (I know how hard this can be).

D&D


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## JASMAK

I got pregnant last September...nothing since.


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## andresmummy

Reading some of your threads has me in tears, thinking about my loss. I think I never really HEALED in a sense. I never thought it could happen to me. My husband and I light a candle EVERY DAY in rememberance (battery activated!). But, I believe our Angel was sent down to me for a reason: I was a person who always had IRREGULAR periods and ever since my Angel grew wings, I have BEEN REGULAR! This excites me so like you wouldn't believe because I am a CLOMID user. When I get a period, I know I have a CHANCE to get my Angel back! A lot of women dred their periods but it is a sign of HOPE for me... My Angel has been away for a little over a year, so 16 months trying to conceive a miracle sounds about right (quoting another thread)... I am on Clomid Round #3. I usually do not get pregnant until the 5th round, so hopefully...

:dust:

You all are beautiful women and I am holding your hand and praying for your miracle...And MINE!


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## chanel

Hey susan, glad you started this thread.

As you know i am more or less in the same situation as you. We caught first time of trying last year but unfortuntely had a mmc at the 12wk scan in november. We have been tryin again since January (as it took that long for a/f to return) but nothing since. My cycles were irregular after the mmc so i have been on everything to try and regulate which seems to have worked as i've been on 25ish day cycle for the past 3 months. 

I went to the doctor a few months back and the they ordered CD21 tests for me and gave me a test kit for DH at the same time. I'd say get to the docs and get the ball rolling so to speak at least then you might feel like you are getting somewhere which might result in a bfp :)

good luckx


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## Widger

Susan - As you know I'm in a similar situation. Since my last mc in Jan I have yet to fall pregnant too. I just don't know what else I can do. Convinced last month was the month but it wasn't and I'm now feeling like it will never happen for me again. 

I am due AF in 3/4 days and if she turns up (which I am expecting again) I think the only positive thing I can do is go and share my concerns with my doctor and see what they say. 

I am seriously losing my PMA too so you are not the only one xx


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## keepingfaith

Hi Everyone,

Last July I found out we were pregnant but miscarried at 7 weeks 2 days and miscarried again in December at 6 weeks. After my second loss we tried every month and nothing. I did notice that my periods were much heavier but I thought it must have been my body readjusting. I pushed my doctor to do some further testing and turns out that I might have an abnormally shaped uterus or a uterine septum and those 'heavy' periods, may have been the start of another pregnancy that just wasn't getting any blood supply. Not sure if any of you have had an HSG/hysteroscopy/Lap..but thought i'd share my story. Now just hoping for a miracle after 3 years ttc!


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## susan_1981

I went to see the doctors on Tuesday evening. She's referred me for a blood test which I have to do on CD21. She was really nice. She said that if you've been trying for 8-9 months without any success, she'll refer you for a blood test. And she said not to worry as if there is something wrong, she said it's generally treatable. She also wants my husband to have a sperm assessment so he has to provide a sample at home and then we need to get it up to the hospital within the hour for testing. Fingers crossed we'll get somewhere. The only thing I have noticed with this cycle is my period wasn't really, really heavy like it has been for the last 6/7 months. And I didn't have bad period pains either. So I don't know if that's my body telling me it's getting back to normal or if it's one of the only months I haven't had a chemical? I don't think I've had any chemical pregnancies though as my period always arrives bang on time.

Hopefully I'll get some answers soon. Wish I was CD21 now. Want to get this over with. I'm sick of the waiting!!! And now I'm on Day 5 of not smoking, I have no patience at all!!!


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## Jem88

Hi susan, im in the exact situation as you. my other halfs had a sperm test done. & im still waitin to have a 21 blood test, ive had to cancel it twice because ive came on. the same thing happend to me this month, its been the first time ive not had a crap/heavy period & also had no pains/cramps at all :S usually there really bad.


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## chanel

hey susan, well done on the smoking :)

As for the CD21 tests, i guess you know that you go for them at 7DPO but i think you said you ov on CD14 anyways so that shouldn't be a problem.

My periods have been fairly normal since the mmc although they were really light this past twice. I think my problem lies with the fertilisation of the egg as opposed to having chemicals but i guess if my lining is too thin then there is nowhere for the egg to implant well. 

Anyway, i'm glad you went to the doctor and hope you feel a little bit better for doing so... good luckx

PS you should have a ticker for number of days since stopping smoking :)


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## susan_1981

Thanks Chanel. I'm not ready to do a ticker for the number of days I haven't been smoking as I'm scared I'll mess up. Still trying to focus really hard on not smoking but it's so difficult! Probably one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do (that and baby making!!).

Hopefully I'll get some answers from the results. I'm charting again this month (didn't really bother last month as I was on holiday) so I'll make sure I go at 7dpo. I usually ovulate on CD14 but the month before last, I ov'd on CD13 so I'll have to keep an eye on that x


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## shalagirl

Hi - I was wondering if anyone had really pushed their doctors for some testing after ur miscarriage. I was told in the hosptial (and it seems pretty general practice from what I've read on the internet) that miscarrriage is not normally investigated until it's happened to a woman 3 times. 

I was wondering about basic tests such as toxoplasmosis (the infection you can pick up from cat & animal droppings). I have always had a cat in my home and I am careful when cleaning the litter tray but I was thinking what if I carry that infection and have done for ages. I was thinking of asking my doctor to test me for it - just in case but not sure if the test is a big deal and if he'll do it no probs. 

Since my miscarriage I have got the hold on quiet a few books on pregnancy and miscarriage. I haven't read them all yet just dipped in and out to parts of interest. Zita West's advice to anyone over 35 (and I am nearly there) is to push your doctor for futher testing after a miscarriage. Reading that made me go _i should get to the doc right now_ but I don't know how serious he would take me as standard NHS policy seems to be wait till its happened 3 times! 

Susan - well done on quitting smoking, taking each day at a time seems a good way to start. A CD21 test and SA for DH is a good place to start once you get through those basic tests with your doctor he will refer you on to a gyn at ur local hosptial so at least u've got the ball rolling. 

There are so many ladies who have posted in this thread in this similar situation and my heart goes out to you all and thank you for sharing your experiences, it does help me to hear / read how someone else has coped and makes me feel that all the emotions I have are not wrong or unusual :hug:


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## Crypto1976

Hi susan, I had an ectopic in march and a chemical in august. I pushed gp for 21 day bloods and even though they are still not back from the lab she started me on clomid. It may not be the answer but like you my LP was getting shorter and shorter ( I think I posted on one of your threads during the summer re. this)

I would push for 21 day bloods. I had positive opks but I am not sure that I ever actually ov. Particularly last month when they took the bloods.

Anyway the bottom line is that I am getting clomid to make ov stronger and also to produce more eggs, in the hope that one gets caught.

Pschycologically I felt better the day the gp agreed to do the bloods, I felt it was a step in the right direction. Good luck, I definitely think ist worth having a chat with your gp.


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## susan_1981

I changed doctors last month because mine were useless. Everytime I'd go, they fob me off and they've always been like this since my usual doctor there retired. Like, for instance, I suffer really badly from knee problems from time to time. Like it hurts if I'm sitting down for more than 15 minutes without being able to stretch my legs and my knees click all the time. So I went to the doctors, and my old doctor referred me to the hospital for an xray. That showed no problems, but my knee problems only ever last for about 2 weeks at a time and by the time I had the xray, my knee was better. Anyway, I went back a few years later after she had retired and was told "knees are complex things" and that was it. Useless. And when I was pregnant, I had a urine infection (the baby had actually already died at this point - it was the day before I found out at my 12 week scan). Anyway, doctor prescribed me antibiotics and when I went to the hospital to arrange my ERPC, the doctor there looked horrified that I'd been prescribed those particular antibiotics. Obviously it didn't cause my miscarriage and the doctor at the hospital didn't say I shouldn't have been taking them, but the look on her face said it all. When I told her what I was taking, she looked horrified and immediately said "how long have you been taking those?"

So I've changed doctors to the one that my husband goes to and she was fantastic. She said if you've been trying for 8-9 months, she will refer you for bloods. She also said "Have you thought about your husband getting checked out because I would recommend it just to rule that out". So she's given me a referral and I just need to go to the hospital on CD21 (although I understand it's 7dpo but CD21 generally is 7dpo for me). So I'll go there and see what they say. I just felt so much better after I'd been to see her as I'm sure that my old doctors would have told me that it can take time to get pregnant and to be patient. But she did say, even if my husband's SA comes back as not great, he has got me pregnant before so it shouldn't be a problem in the future as, like we all know, it only takes one sperm to make a baby. But she did say after my blood test and my husband's SA, I have to go back to her and she said that generally, most things that cause infertility are treatable.

I'm not sure if I want the tests to show something wrong that's treatable or to come back all clear. Either way, at least I've got the ball rolling to see what's going on xx


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## chanel

hey susan, thats a promising bit of info for me in that if you DH got you pregnant before then there is definite hope of conceiving again... that may be either naturally or assisted but at least we know its possible.

sending lots of baby dust to you... hoping we both get our bfps before too much longer.

Actually, heres a laugh for you... my mum reckoned we are like animals in that we are only capable of conceiving at certain times of the year which for me is the month of august but lets say its august/september/october :) so obviously thats the reason we haven't caught throughout the rest of the year. When i though about it i thought she might have a point which is more evident when you think of couples that have more than one and there bdays are around the same time of year. 

With this in mind you fertile time is coming up in the next 2-4 months :)

good luckx


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## Widger

chanel said:


> hey susan, thats a promising bit of info for me in that if you DH got you pregnant before then there is definite hope of conceiving again... that may be either naturally or assisted but at least we know its possible.
> 
> sending lots of baby dust to you... hoping we both get our bfps before too much longer.
> 
> Actually, heres a laugh for you... my mum reckoned we are like animals in that we are only capable of conceiving at certain times of the year which for me is the month of august but lets say its august/september/october :) so obviously thats the reason we haven't caught throughout the rest of the year. When i though about it i thought she might have a point which is more evident when you think of couples that have more than one and there bdays are around the same time of year.
> 
> With this in mind you fertile time is coming up in the next 2-4 months :)
> 
> good luckx

I think there may be something in this.... ok bear with me... I am not normally crazy :wacko:

I was thinking about this the other night, my mum had the 3 of us in June, July & August. I had bfp last october (unfortunatley was chemical), then straight after in november (unfortunatley mmc). My nan had her children in May, 2 in June, July.

I was hoping that this would be my month (even though it wasn't last year) but am about 13dpo and got a bfn on FRER today. 

Maybe it will happen and stick in October as defo think I'm out of the running this month. Anyway, watch this space. 

Great news about the doctor Susan. My hubby went to docs the other day to see if he could be checked out (sperm) but doc said that there wasn't a prob as I had conceived 3 times. Just unlucky....!!!

I have gone out today and bought every supplement known to man as I am determined to get that elusive :bfp:. 

Let's just hope that by the end of the year we will all have stories to tell of our BFPs. We have to hold on to the hope that maybe our bodies are rejecting all the pregnancies that would not go the whole term and that next one will be sticky xxx


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## shalagirl

Chanel & Widger I think you are on to something about being able to conceive (or having a better chance of conceiving at certain times in the year) - this too has crossed my mind before. Both times I did get pregnant was around June time. However thinking back to when I was young(er) (around 24 to 28) around May / June time I would really notice a difference in the amount of CM my body was producing - much more than normal. I would wonder what was the matter and wear panty liners much more and even bought powder to help keep me fresh and dryer! (sorry if this is too much info). Then my CM would settle back to normal levels. Perhaps I was getting lots of great CM as I was at my peak fertility time - not sure if this all sounds silly but just maybe there are certain times in the year ur body is more open to conceiving than others.


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## shalagirl

Widger said:


> I have gone out today and bought every supplement known to man as I am determined to get that elusive :bfp:.

Widger - what supplements did you opt for? I am taking the Pregnacare for conception tablets. However I was reading in a book that if you have had a miscarriage 300-400mg of magnesium may help and the Pregnancare supplement only supplies 60mg. I am planning on going through all the books I have gathered up and making a list of what vitamins and minerals they suggest and checking the levels and if I need to buy extra or an alternative to Pregnacare.


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