# How long....



## Hotbump

did you know your OH/FOB before getting pregnant? :flower:

I had been with OH only 3 months before I got pregnant with jovanni :blush:


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## x__amour

We had been together a little over a year. :flower:


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## 112110

I don't know exactly when I got pregnant but we first had sex a little after our 7 months I think it was probably 9 months? :shrug:


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## bbyno1

5 or 6 years.
Sounds mad but we have lost track if we have been together 7 years now or 6 years (we got together on May 21st) lol


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## Kians_Mummy

I was with my OH for 5 months prior to getting pregnant. Feels like a life time now!


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## _laura

We were seeing each other for a few months. Then we got together 'officially' when Max was conceived. But obviously we didn't know for so long.


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## Rhio92

I'd been with FOB for about 5 months :blush:


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## rainbows_x

Aha, not very long!
We started seeing eachother around June I think, I got pregnant with my first in late July, we didn't get together until August! So technically we weren't together. Had a mc in September and got pregnant again in November so that was 3 months.


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## abbSTAR

about five months 


sound like we all had like a 'five month itch' :haha:


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## annawrigley

We'd been together 8 months. Stayed together a further 6 then crashed and burned :haha:


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## Burchy314

Officially we had been together for a year and a half before getting pregnant, but we were on and off for like a year before then.


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## AriannasMama

2 years.


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## lilosmum

Known each other briefly for 6 months, friendly for 6 months together for 2 months before conception! Not very long i know but we have know been together for nearly 2 years!


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## Yazz_n_bump

Erm, just under two years of being together.  But I've known him a bit longer before we got together.


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## MissFoley

ermm just over 3 years i think :/ 
seems alot longer x


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## lily123

I'd known FOB for 5 months before we got together, then we were together for 10 months before i got preg.
I've known OH for nearly 6 years :) xx


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## Marzipan_girl

Only 4 months! Then when I announced the pregnancy we broke up and hated eachother for a while...then slowly got back together throughout the pregnancy and when Rory was born we moved in together!


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## smatheson

Found out I was pregnant three days before our one year.


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## vinteenage

Nearly 3 years.


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## amygwen

We'd been together for like 2.5 years :)


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## purple_kiwi

around 3 years. feels like so long lol


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## Desi's_lost

9 months :haha:
then it fell apart within weeks, for the best really. He still hasnt grown up, still cuts himself even with a new gf.


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## annawrigley

Desi's_lost said:


> 9 months :haha:
> then it fell apart within weeks, for the best really. *He still hasnt grown up, still cuts himself even with a new gf.*

Huh? Dunno if that was a separate sentence or you mean he's childish for self-harming?


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## Desi's_lost

annawrigley said:


> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> 9 months :haha:
> then it fell apart within weeks, for the best really. *He still hasnt grown up, still cuts himself even with a new gf.*
> 
> Huh? Dunno if that was a separate sentence or you mean he's childish for self-harming?Click to expand...

Both. He's childish in the sense of he has no interest in his child and various other stupid things. And the fact that he still cuts himself which if he hasn't changed is just a branch of the abuse he puts the girls he's with through.


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## _laura

Desi's_lost said:


> And the fact that he still cuts himself which if he hasn't changed is just a branch of the abuse he puts the girls he's with through.

I'd say if he still cuts himself he has some serious issues that he needs to deal with. Not a funny matter.


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## Desi's_lost

_laura said:


> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> And the fact that he still cuts himself which if he hasn't changed is just a branch of the abuse he puts the girls he's with through.
> 
> I'd say if he still cuts himself he has some serious issues that he needs to deal with. Not a funny matter.Click to expand...

:shrug: I have no sympathy for him.

ETA: any other person, and i would care. but as far as im concerned he doesnt deserve shit.


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## mayb_baby

We started meeting each other in August 2006(I was 15, he was 16), became a couple January 2007. Broke up July 2009, got back October 2009 then fell pregnant November 2009 suffered a MC January 2010. Got pregnant with Michael March 2010 so about 4years ;)


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## annawrigley

Desi's_lost said:


> annawrigley said:
> 
> 
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> 
> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> 9 months :haha:
> then it fell apart within weeks, for the best really. *He still hasnt grown up, still cuts himself even with a new gf.*
> 
> Huh? Dunno if that was a separate sentence or you mean he's childish for self-harming?Click to expand...
> 
> Both. He's childish in the sense of he has no interest in his child and various other stupid things. And the fact that he still cuts himself which if he hasn't changed is just a branch of the abuse he puts the girls he's with through.Click to expand...

Agree with the first point but agree with Laura on the second point - he must have some deeper issues to be doing that other than just 'abusing girls'. Sounds like he needs some help.


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## Desi's_lost

Well he started cutting for the first time i know of when he was with me, and the reason was because I "Had been with someone else before him" or because he was afraid I was talking to other males or that other things besides him made me happy. No I dont know his reasoning now but...can you blame me for not caring?


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## rainbows_x

Desi's_lost said:


> Well he started cutting for the first time i know of when he was with me, and the reason was because I "Had been with someone else before him" or because he was afraid I was talking to other males or that other things besides him made me happy. No I dont know his reasoning now but...can you blame me for not caring?

Seems to me like he was/is paranoid, or has some form of depression. I have cut before, there are so many reasons behind people doing it, I don't think you should be so harsh.


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## annawrigley

Desi's_lost said:


> Well he started cutting for the first time i know of when he was with me, and the reason was because I "Had been with someone else before him" or because he was afraid I was talking to other males or that other things besides him made me happy. No I dont know his reasoning now but...can you blame me for not caring?

There may have been other reasons he didn't tell you about :shrug:


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## mayb_baby

Sounds to me like he does it for control (If I do it she won't do whatever it is that&#8217;s annoying him), iykwim. Like a look what you&#8217;re doing to me kind of thing :/

Maybe I'm too harsh but if he does it with his gf&#8217;s I can&#8217;t help but put two and two together and get this outcome it&#8217;s a form of domestic abuse, I would know lol. My ex&#8217;s were always going to hurt themselves or kill themselves (2 ex&#8217;s) if I was finished with them or did something they didn&#8217;t like xx


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## Desi's_lost

annawrigley said:


> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> Well he started cutting for the first time i know of when he was with me, and the reason was because I "Had been with someone else before him" or because he was afraid I was talking to other males or that other things besides him made me happy. No I dont know his reasoning now but...can you blame me for not caring?
> 
> There may have been other reasons he didn't tell you about :shrug:Click to expand...

I think you're giving him a bit more credit than he deserves. But I doubt it. He is an abusive person. Threatened to kill us both by crashing his car a few times. Deep down he's a brat. He wants what he wants and thats all there is to it. You give it to him or he pulls stunts. I'm not gonna lie and say his parents arent the root of a lot of it, but he's an adult. I asked him a thousand times to talk to someone.


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## annawrigley

Desi's_lost said:


> annawrigley said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> Well he started cutting for the first time i know of when he was with me, and the reason was because I "Had been with someone else before him" or because he was afraid I was talking to other males or that other things besides him made me happy. No I dont know his reasoning now but...can you blame me for not caring?
> 
> There may have been other reasons he didn't tell you about :shrug: Click to expand...
> 
> I think you're giving him a bit more credit than he deserves. But I doubt it. He is an abusive person. Threatened to kill us both by crashing his car a few times. Deep down he's a brat. He wants what he wants and thats all there is to it. You give it to him or he pulls stunts. I'm not gonna lie and say his parents arent the root of a lot of it, but he's an adult. I asked him a thousand times to talk to someone.Click to expand...

:roll: Not always as easy as that! I am not defending him being abusive, i'm the last person that would, i just think unless you know what is going on in his head you have no place to judge, however well you think you know him


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## samface182

i had known him for 5 years. but had only been together for 3.5months :blush:


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## Desi's_lost

annawrigley said:


> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> annawrigley said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> Well he started cutting for the first time i know of when he was with me, and the reason was because I "Had been with someone else before him" or because he was afraid I was talking to other males or that other things besides him made me happy. No I dont know his reasoning now but...can you blame me for not caring?
> 
> There may have been other reasons he didn't tell you about :shrug: Click to expand...
> 
> I think you're giving him a bit more credit than he deserves. But I doubt it. He is an abusive person. Threatened to kill us both by crashing his car a few times. Deep down he's a brat. He wants what he wants and thats all there is to it. You give it to him or he pulls stunts. I'm not gonna lie and say his parents arent the root of a lot of it, but he's an adult. I asked him a thousand times to talk to someone.Click to expand...
> 
> :roll: Not always as easy as that! I am not defending him being abusive, i'm the last person that would, i just think unless you know what is going on in his head you have no place to judge, however well you think you know himClick to expand...

I do have place to judge him. He asked for a child then turned tail and ran, leaving her with no father, not caring if I fell flat on my face, not caring what life she would have. I spent every day for at least 6 months with him, wrestled belts from around his neck. Wrestled knives out of his hand. Spent countless days crying, pleading, trying to fix him. I wasted my entire senior, spent a good portion of it in bathrooms so that I couldnt possibly be around anyone that would make him mad. Didn't talk to just about anyone, trying to make someone who would never be happy happy. Besides "god" i'm fairly certain of all people who have right to judge him, I do.


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## LoisP

On our one year anniversary (roughly) I found out I was pregnant.

ETA: But I'd known him for a year... and 2 months. Lol, yeah we didn't exactly wait long before we became official lol


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## Calsmommy

got pregnant when we had been together almost 1 year, but had known him for a few months before we got together.


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## JessMumzyJxx

About 3 years :)


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## lov3hat3

Id known FOB 3 weeks :blush:
We didnt get together officially untill a couple weeks after i actually got pregnant


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## annawrigley

Desi's_lost said:


> annawrigley said:
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> Desi's_lost said:
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> annawrigley said:
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> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> Well he started cutting for the first time i know of when he was with me, and the reason was because I "Had been with someone else before him" or because he was afraid I was talking to other males or that other things besides him made me happy. No I dont know his reasoning now but...can you blame me for not caring?
> 
> There may have been other reasons he didn't tell you about :shrug: Click to expand...
> 
> I think you're giving him a bit more credit than he deserves. But I doubt it. He is an abusive person. Threatened to kill us both by crashing his car a few times. Deep down he's a brat. He wants what he wants and thats all there is to it. You give it to him or he pulls stunts. I'm not gonna lie and say his parents arent the root of a lot of it, but he's an adult. I asked him a thousand times to talk to someone.Click to expand...
> 
> :roll: Not always as easy as that! I am not defending him being abusive, i'm the last person that would, i just think unless you know what is going on in his head you have no place to judge, however well you think you know himClick to expand...
> 
> I do have place to judge him. He asked for a child then turned tail and ran, leaving her with no father, not caring if I fell flat on my face, not caring what life she would have. I spent every day for at least 6 months with him, wrestled belts from around his neck. Wrestled knives out of his hand. Spent countless days crying, pleading, trying to fix him. I wasted my entire senior, spent a good portion of it in bathrooms so that I couldnt possibly be around anyone that would make him mad. Didn't talk to just about anyone, trying to make someone who would never be happy happy. Besides "god" i'm fairly certain of all people who have right to judge him, I do.Click to expand...

:roll: Ok then


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## lauram_92

just over a year. now we don't speak :L


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## xx~Lor~xx

We'd been together about a year when I fell pregnant with our daughter. We'd already been living together for 5 months by that time too.


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## Callie-xoxox

I was with FOB for 3 Years before I had Lyrik.

Now I am with OH and we have been together for 6 months,
But no babies for a LONG time!


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## KaceysMummy

I had been with OH for 3/4 months before I fell pregnant. Had knew him for a year before we started going out... xx


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## Lucy22

We had been together 4 years, and I had known him 6 years. But if I'm honest we started having sex about a year after we got together so its a miracle I hadn't already gotten pregnant before we conceived Elena.


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## 17thy

We had started dating June 29th, 2009, then he left for boot camp on July 12th, 2009. He came back December 12th, 2009. I got conceived around February 22nd. So we had really only been physically together for like a little over two months before we got pregnant, but now we've been together almost 2 years, and married for over 1 year.


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## lizardbreath

Umm , well he was my best friend for 3 years then we dated for a year and 5 months before Jaymee was Concieved, and we were together 3 years and 11 months before Katherine was born .


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## ~KACI~

We'd been together 8months , still together 6years later:)


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## bbyno1

Im boring. Im the one whos been with OH the longest i think lol


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## stephx

Eerrrmm 2 years? X


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## leoniebabey

got together end of july the 30th i think 
got pregnant sorta end of august
so a month :|


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## Marlarky

We were ttc after only knowing eachother not even 2 months :dohh:

Got pregnant after 10 months of trying. So it was almost a year.


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## vinteenage

annawrigley said:


> Desi's_lost said:
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> annawrigley said:
> 
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> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> annawrigley said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> Desi's_lost said:
> 
> 
> Well he started cutting for the first time i know of when he was with me, and the reason was because I "Had been with someone else before him" or because he was afraid I was talking to other males or that other things besides him made me happy. No I dont know his reasoning now but...can you blame me for not caring?
> 
> There may have been other reasons he didn't tell you about :shrug: Click to expand...
> 
> I think you're giving him a bit more credit than he deserves. But I doubt it. He is an abusive person. Threatened to kill us both by crashing his car a few times. Deep down he's a brat. He wants what he wants and thats all there is to it. You give it to him or he pulls stunts. I'm not gonna lie and say his parents arent the root of a lot of it, but he's an adult. I asked him a thousand times to talk to someone.Click to expand...
> 
> :roll: Not always as easy as that! I am not defending him being abusive, i'm the last person that would, i just think unless you know what is going on in his head you have no place to judge, however well you think you know himClick to expand...
> 
> I do have place to judge him. He asked for a child then turned tail and ran, leaving her with no father, not caring if I fell flat on my face, not caring what life she would have. I spent every day for at least 6 months with him, wrestled belts from around his neck. Wrestled knives out of his hand. Spent countless days crying, pleading, trying to fix him. I wasted my entire senior, spent a good portion of it in bathrooms so that I couldnt possibly be around anyone that would make him mad. Didn't talk to just about anyone, trying to make someone who would never be happy happy. Besides "god" i'm fairly certain of all people who have right to judge him, I do.Click to expand...
> 
> :roll: Ok thenClick to expand...

Seriously. I think it's pretty obvious there's something wrong with him either mentally or emotionally. The fact that he asked for a child, then turned tail and ran also hints at that.

:nope:

I'm not defending him, there's no excuse for abusing others or being malicious but I think anyone who's self harming deserves some degree of sympathy. It's sad, if this is the reason, that he feels he can't keep someone with him unless he goes to these lengths.


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## Desi's_lost

...Daphne..you know pretty well what the situation was. He turned tail and ran because his parents turned into mr. and mrs adolf hitler. They immediately told him he could no longer see me, they were taking his car (that he paid for), told him if he stayed with me he was going to be written out of the family and the family business that he had put 110% into since he was 8 years old. He wanted me to have an abortion because things were not going the way he wanted and I finally did something i'd never done before. I took control of my life and told him no, there was no way I was forsaking my child just because suddenly it wasnt easy. even in the end, he left because * he wasnt getting his way *

I'm glad though that you and Anna think that it matters what the hell is wrong with him. he isn't some innocent by stander here. He's guilty of many wrong doings so i'm surprised you guys care in the first place what the hell is wrong with him or feel the need to second guess my judgement as though you suddenly know him.


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## _laura

Desi's_lost said:


> ...Daphne..you know pretty well what the situation was. He turned tail and ran because his parents turned into mr. and mrs adolf hitler. They immediately told him he could no longer see me, they were taking his car (that he paid for), told him if he stayed with me he was going to be written out of the family and the family business that he had put 110% into since he was 8 years old. He wanted me to have an abortion because things were not going the way he wanted and I finally did something i'd never done before. I took control of my life and told him no, there was no way I was forsaking my child just because suddenly it wasnt easy. even in the end, he left because * he wasnt getting his way *
> 
> I'm glad though that you and Anna think that it matters what the hell is wrong with him. he isn't some innocent by stander here. He's guilty of many wrong doings so i'm surprised you guys care in the first place what the hell is wrong with him or feel the need to second guess my judgement as though you suddenly know him.

No they're just stating the fact that a mental disorder may make you act crazy to others and you may hurt people but it can also mean that you desperately want help and don't know how to show it or are too afraid to ask for it. No one is denying he hurt you, just saying there are 2 sides to every story. :shrug:


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## AriannasMama

Uhm, Desi, no one said he was innocent, everyone is just saying because he obviously has some problem you shouldn't be so cold about him self harming. What if he kills himself? Wont Syri want to know about her father someday? If you don't care about him cutting what will you tell her? "Oh...he killed himself, no big deal" :dohh: Be the bigger person and have some heart about his obvious mental illness!

No ones saying what he did by deserting his child was right but geez, mental illness and self harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.


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## Desi's_lost

Being an asshole isn't a mental illness. No, i really don't care what happens to him. He lost the right for me to care about him when he decided he wasnt going to be a man and take care of what would have been his child. Now he's nothing and will be nothing. 
There is NO reason why he can't love his daughter other than his own selfishness. For what he took from her I will never forgive him. He is as good as dead to me. For her sake, I hope she sees it the same way as I do. 
I'm willing to forgive what he took from me, but you hurt my daughter and thats it. No second chances.


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## Leah_xx

It was like a year after we were together that i got pregnant


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## vinteenage

Desi's_lost said:


> ...Daphne..you know pretty well what the situation was. He turned tail and ran because his parents turned into mr. and mrs adolf hitler. They immediately told him he could no longer see me, they were taking his car (that he paid for), told him if he stayed with me he was going to be written out of the family and the family business that he had put 110% into since he was 8 years old. He wanted me to have an abortion because things were not going the way he wanted and I finally did something i'd never done before. I took control of my life and told him no, there was no way I was forsaking my child just because suddenly it wasnt easy. even in the end, he left because * he wasnt getting his way *
> 
> I'm glad though that you and Anna think that it matters what the hell is wrong with him. he isn't some innocent by stander here. He's guilty of many wrong doings so i'm surprised you guys care in the first place what the hell is wrong with him or feel the need to second guess my judgement as though you suddenly know him.


Yes I know what happened and I'm not excusing him, *what he did is unspeakably shitty to both you and Syri*. However, Desi, do you not see how this could be attached to commitment etc problems? He obviously feels like he has to go to drastic actions to keep relationships. The cutting, threatening, the fear being cut of his parents lives, etc.

Again, I'm not excusing him. He has no excuse. But I do feel badly that it seems he has to take these kinds of moves to keep people around him. 

I'm done trying to defend my point. :flower:


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## AriannasMama

My best friends dad has sever bi-polar and when he is manic he isn't even himself, he has pushed his wife into walls, screamed at his kids, maxed out credit cards and all sorts of crap, thats not selfishness, thats a disease. Your FOB sounds like he is mentally ill and you can't really just call it selfishness if you don't know what could be wrong. & for his and your sake, I really hope he gets through this and can help. I would feel horrible if I said I didn't care if someone killed themselves and they ended up doing it.

Also done arguing my point as well as I am sure many others.


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## mayb_baby

AriannasMama said:


> Uhm, Desi, no one said he was innocent, everyone is just saying because he obviously has some problem you shouldn't be so cold about him self harming. What if he kills himself? Wont Syri want to know about her father someday? If you don't care about him cutting what will you tell her? "Oh...he killed himself, no big deal" :dohh: Be the bigger person and have some heart about his obvious mental illness!
> 
> No ones saying what he did by deserting his child was right but geez, mental illness and self harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.

I am kind of cold too some self-harmers well my auntie and you can all jump up and down and take hissy fits :hissy: because shes a mental twat that seeks attention. I mean she slits her wrists and ODs all the time once every 2 weeks sometimes every week and occasionally more than once on a weekend. She is an alcoholic and an abuser all under the bright watchful eyes of her 7year old and her 15year old. Who a month ago tied bed sheets around her wrists as he was petrified, she has been signed in countless times and the social wont intervene due to she isnt dangerous sober she loves a drama.

Claims to be bulimic/anorexic when in fact she has been caught researching it and playing it up when I was being watched. As some of you know I suffered a MC over a year ago, a few days after she too had a MC on the implant :/, now she is a vile creature who may have mental issues but when she is sober she doesnt change, however she is sneaky! She will say and do anything to get you in shit, she turns on her son the whole time. He is fifteen and due to watching her and his little brother he cant read or write :cry: (She sees an ambulance and jokes look theres my taxi)

Her son at 7 was bought call of duty aged 5 and assassins creed and has watched chucky aged 2 (he ran around the house with a knife) and they laughed. I'm not dumb and as I write this I know she has issues but with two kids, family who all try to help rehab. . . etc and her not giving a shit her children WOULD 100% be better off without her and never would I agree to this in most circumstances but I hate this woman. She has destroyed to beautiful boys lives and still stirs up crap in our family! She loves to play :-({|= 'I'm ill' FUCK UP! Aghhhhh:growlmad:

So no I dont believe mental illness and self-harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.

Sorry for the rant I never meant to go off like that but this issue is such a bitch for me I understand Desi, (I know her OH wasnt this extreme) but I feel her OH maybe like an ex of mine (sliced in-between his fingers so Id get back with him) I called his mum and he was fine 2 months later just being a twat and a control freak.

OK shutting up now


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## AriannasMama

.


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## mayb_baby

vinteenage said:


> Yes I know what happened and I'm not excusing him, *what he did is unspeakably shitty to both you and Syri*. However, Desi, do you not see how this could be attached to commitment etc problems? He obviously feels like he has to go to drastic actions to keep relationships. The cutting, threatening, the fear being cut of his parents lives, etc.
> 
> Again, I'm not excusing him. He has no excuse. But I do feel badly that it seems he has to take these kinds of moves to keep people around him.
> 
> I'm done trying to defend my point. :flower:

Why do we pity someone whos not diagnosed who may just be a *******??


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## vinteenage

mayb_baby said:


> [
> 
> So no I dont believe mental illness and self-harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.

But doing things like that does fall under a category for a mental disorder. It's sounds like a variant of histrionic personality disorder along with low self esteem.


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## vinteenage

mayb_baby said:


> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> Yes I know what happened and I'm not excusing him, *what he did is unspeakably shitty to both you and Syri*. However, Desi, do you not see how this could be attached to commitment etc problems? He obviously feels like he has to go to drastic actions to keep relationships. The cutting, threatening, the fear being cut of his parents lives, etc.
> 
> Again, I'm not excusing him. He has no excuse. But I do feel badly that it seems he has to take these kinds of moves to keep people around him.
> 
> I'm done trying to defend my point. :flower:
> 
> Why do we pity someone who&#8217;s not diagnosed who may just be a *******??Click to expand...

Personally, I don't believe anyone who is self harming is doing it only for the hell of it, or to keep someone there. Whether you realize it or not I'm 99.9% that there's something deeply mentally or emotionally behind that needs to be dealt with. So yes, I'm going to feel badly they're not getting the help they need (not pitying) but that doesn't excuse the choices they made.

I grew up with a mother who had addiction, depression and anxiety issues. It is not an excuse for some of the things she did, but realizing some of the things behind it, I can understand it better.


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## AriannasMama

If you are sad enough to cut yourself I'd call that a mental disorder in its own.


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## mayb_baby

vinteenage said:


> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> [
> 
> So no I dont believe mental illness and self-harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.
> 
> But doing things like that does fall under a category for a mental disorder. It's sounds like a variant of histrionic personality disorder along with low self esteem.Click to expand...

Or it could fall under domestic violence https://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/warning_signs.html


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## vinteenage

mayb_baby said:


> vinteenage said:
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> 
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> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> [
> 
> So no I don&#8217;t believe &#8216;mental illness and self-harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.&#8217;
> 
> But doing things like that does fall under a category for a mental disorder. It's sounds like a variant of histrionic personality disorder along with low self esteem.Click to expand...
> 
> Or it could fall under domestic violence https://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/warning_signs.htmlClick to expand...

But that's still a disorder, still something you go to therapy for, still something that can be fixed with the correct help. :dohh: Abusive personality disorders.


----------



## mayb_baby

AriannasMama said:


> If you are sad enough to cut yourself I'd call that a mental disorder in its own.

Yes but some 'mental disorders' thrive off attention/pity


----------



## AriannasMama

Ok, even if its not a mental disorder there is something severely wrong that he feels the need to cut his own flesh. You don't just do that for fun...


----------



## mayb_baby

vinteenage said:


> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> [
> 
> So no I dont believe mental illness and self-harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.
> 
> But doing things like that does fall under a category for a mental disorder. It's sounds like a variant of histrionic personality disorder along with low self esteem.Click to expand...
> 
> Or it could fall under domestic violence https://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/warning_signs.htmlClick to expand...
> 
> But that's still a disorder, still something you go to therapy for, still something that can be fixed with the correct help. :dohh:Click to expand...

So is murder and rape but who jumps on the 'poor them' bandwagon then


----------



## mayb_baby

AriannasMama said:


> Ok, even if its not a mental disorder there is something severely wrong that he feels the need to cut his own flesh. You don't just do that for fun...

For control:coffee:


----------



## vinteenage

mayb_baby said:


> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> [
> 
> So no I dont believe mental illness and self-harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.
> 
> But doing things like that does fall under a category for a mental disorder. It's sounds like a variant of histrionic personality disorder along with low self esteem.Click to expand...
> 
> Or it could fall under domestic violence https://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/warning_signs.htmlClick to expand...
> 
> But that's still a disorder, still something you go to therapy for, still something that can be fixed with the correct help. :dohh:Click to expand...
> 
> So is murder and rape but who jumps on the 'poor them' bandwagon thenClick to expand...

Goodness. I don't even know what to say. Comparing mental disorders (as they're rampant in my family) to murder and rape is sickening.

Lorna, you know I have no problem with you! But I think we've hit a wall with this.


----------



## AriannasMama

Um murder and rape are crimes, those are choices people make. Most people don't wake up and say "I think I'll be schizophrenic today!"


----------



## AriannasMama

mayb_baby said:


> AriannasMama said:
> 
> 
> Ok, even if its not a mental disorder there is something severely wrong that he feels the need to cut his own flesh. You don't just do that for fun...
> 
> For control:coffee:Click to expand...

If you feel you need to control someone with self harm then something is still wrong with you! THAT ISNT NORMAL!


----------



## vinteenage

AriannasMama said:


> Um murder and rape are crimes, those are choices people make. Most people don't wake up and say "I think I'll be schizophrenic today!"

This. Thanks Cari.


----------



## vinteenage

I think, unless you've dealt with those with mental/emotional disorders and seen how they're treated....you're not going to see this in the same light.


----------



## mayb_baby

vinteenage said:


> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> [
> 
> So no I dont believe mental illness and self-harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.
> 
> But doing things like that does fall under a category for a mental disorder. It's sounds like a variant of histrionic personality disorder along with low self esteem.Click to expand...
> 
> Or it could fall under domestic violence https://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/warning_signs.htmlClick to expand...
> 
> But that's still a disorder, still something you go to therapy for, still something that can be fixed with the correct help. :dohh:Click to expand...
> 
> So is murder and rape but who jumps on the 'poor them' bandwagon thenClick to expand...
> 
> Goodness. I don't even know what to say. Comparing mental disorders (as they're rampant in my family) to murder and rape is sickening.
> 
> Lorna, you know I have no problem with you! But I think we've hit a wall with this.Click to expand...

Well its extreme yes but I bet a scientific answer would say it started with a mental disorder I have a lot of mental issues myself mainly depression related or eating issues. However I will remain determined and state that all this pity for assholes or people that hurt others in there mental disorders/diagnosed or undiagnosed that dont seek help themselves DO NOT DESEVE pity.

I have no issues either I just hate this poor him when no one here apart from Desi knows him or what he does


----------



## mayb_baby

AriannasMama said:


> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AriannasMama said:
> 
> 
> Ok, even if its not a mental disorder there is something severely wrong that he feels the need to cut his own flesh. You don't just do that for fun...
> 
> For control:coffee:Click to expand...
> 
> If you feel you need to control someone with self harm then something is still wrong with you! THAT ISNT NORMAL!Click to expand...

It is a control method though, no its not 'normal' but neither is domestic abuse


----------



## vinteenage

mayb_baby said:


> I have no issues either I just hate this poor him when no one here apart from Desi knows him or what he does

I don't think anyone's actually said "poor him". Just that there may be behind issues to Desi's FOB. I think we've all been pretty clear that this doesn't excuse him. :shrug:


----------



## mayb_baby

Yes OK they have 'issues' there family etc. should pity them not us. This is a support group he&#8217;s not on it SHE is, so why do we jump on his side. 'Poor abuser all them issues, desi look he may have tried to control you and hurt your daughter. We&#8217;re not excusing it but he is self-harming poor guy' If I was her I&#8217;d be pissed. 

Unless you&#8217;re in the 'victims' shoes you won&#8217;t understand how what your saying is being perceived. Which you can clearly tell through her replies


----------



## sequeena

Oh girls :hugs:

I do believe there are some people out there who are 'depressed' and 'cut' for attention. 

I was a cutter... well I didn't do it religiously or anything. I was sexually abused by my step father for 10 years and when I finally pressed charges I found it very hard to cope with everyone knowing about what happened to me. My sister and niece expected me to just be 'over' it too as I'd had 10 years of it, but I'm not sure how you can be over something when you never had the oppurtunity to speak about it and heal. I spiralled into depression and was put onto anti depressants. The second time I cut I also overdosed. I'm still not quite sure why I did it and can't really remember how it happened. The doctors asked me if I wanted to die and I really didn't want to... I think I just wanted a release, to just escape for a while.

I conceived a month later, and got my :bfp: the day my abuser was found not guilty. I am very lucky in that I have my partner and my son (even though he isn't born yet).

I've been to counselling a couple of times but have stopped it since becoming pregnant as I find it much too stressful. I'm lucky in that I've been able to somehow self regulate my moods, I'm very proud I don't need anti d's.

Now I don't know what will happen in the future but I don't want to ever go back to the dark place again and I never want my son to be hurt like I was. That's just my experience, I can't comment on every single person who has mental issues. Living with someone like me is extremely hard and I can understand the frustration/resentment/lack of pity. :flower:

Oh and to answer the OP I conceived just over 2 years into our relationship. We've been together nearly 3 years... we basically ttc'd straight away :blush:


----------



## vinteenage

mayb_baby said:


> Yes OK they have 'issues' there family etc. should pity them not us. This is a support group hes not on it SHE is, so why do we jump on his side. 'Poor abuser all them issues, desi look he may have tried to control you and hurt your daughter. Were not excusing it but he is self-harming poor guy' If I was her Id be pissed.
> 
> Unless youre in the 'victims' shoes you wont understand how what your saying is being perceived. Which you can clearly tell through her replies

Then things like "cutting is immature" shouldn't be said. People are going to take offense as others in their lives have done the same and feel it's linked something serious, not immaturity.


----------



## mayb_baby

vinteenage said:


> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> I have no issues either I just hate this poor him when no one here apart from Desi knows him or what he does
> 
> I don't think anyone's actually said "poor him". Just that there may be behind issues to Desi's FOB. I think we've all been pretty clear that this doesn't excuse him. :shrug:Click to expand...

OK maybe its this yummy wine or the fact its 2.30am but it seems that way when people are telling her to understand when she went through the crap with him. 

Maybe Im more defensive as my relationships shitty but no one mollycoddled my OHs behaviour they all said 'ditch' him. Which I know I should and I havent thats my own issue. I guess Im reading the replies the way I would take them


----------



## AriannasMama

Uhm, I have been a victim of domestic abuse. I've had to go to all the trials seeing the abuser there, I've had to go through dealing with getting orders of protection and worrying that he will retaliate somehow. I understand that she is pissed but I don't think cutting yourself for whatever reason is normal and as a human its normal to feel sympathy for that situation, not even the person him/herself. If I found out today that my ex who I was just talking about had some sort of mental illness and was homeless on the streets of Chicago harming himself I would feel sympathy for that situation. 

Just because you feel hate for that person doesn't mean they don't have a family/loved ones. If your LO was in a similar situation (had a baby and didn't stick around, but was self harming) wouldn't you at least be worried about that part? You need to view things from all perspectives to understand.


----------



## vinteenage

mayb_baby said:


> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> I have no issues either I just hate this poor him when no one here apart from Desi knows him or what he does
> 
> I don't think anyone's actually said "poor him". Just that there may be behind issues to Desi's FOB. I think we've all been pretty clear that this doesn't excuse him. :shrug:Click to expand...
> 
> OK maybe it&#8217;s this yummy wine or the fact its 2.30am but it seems that way when people are telling her to understand when she went through the crap with him.
> 
> Maybe I&#8217;m more defensive as my relationships shitty but no one mollycoddled my OHs behaviour they all said 'ditch' him. Which I know I should and I haven&#8217;t that&#8217;s my own issue. I guess I&#8217;m reading the replies the way I would take themClick to expand...

But what's done is done, as said commonly in Teen Preg. I absolutely can see and understand why Desi is hurt and angry and I dont think those feelings are wrong in anyway but I don't think that warrants saying she wouldn't care if he died (or whatever, it was similar), that cutting is immature and attention seeking and completely resisting the idea that maybe he's not doing it all for attention but he may have something wrong.
:flower:


----------



## mayb_baby

sequeena said:


> Oh girls :hugs:
> 
> I do believe there are some people out there who are 'depressed' and 'cut' for attention.
> 
> I was a cutter... well I didn't do it religiously or anything. I was sexually abused by my step father for 10 years and when I finally pressed charges I found it very hard to cope with everyone knowing about what happened to me. My sister and niece expected me to just be 'over' it too as I'd had 10 years of it, but I'm not sure how you can be over something when you never had the oppurtunity to speak about it and heal. I spiralled into depression and was put onto anti depressants. The second time I cut I also overdosed. I'm still not quite sure why I did it and can't really remember how it happened. The doctors asked me if I wanted to die and I really didn't want to... I think I just wanted a release, to just escape for a while.
> 
> I conceived a month later, and got my :bfp: the day my abuser was found not guilty. I am very lucky in that I have my partner and my son (even though he isn't born yet).
> 
> I've been to counselling a couple of times but have stopped it since becoming pregnant as I find it much too stressful. I'm lucky in that I've been able to somehow self regulate my moods, I'm very proud I don't need anti d's.
> 
> Now I don't know what will happen in the future but I don't want to ever go back to the dark place again and I never want my son to be hurt like I was. That's just my experience, I can't comment on every single person who has mental issues. Living with someone like me is extremely hard and I can understand the frustration/resentment/lack of pity. :flower:
> 
> Oh and to answer the OP I conceived just over 2 years into our relationship. We've been together nearly 3 years... we basically ttc'd straight away :blush:

That is a completely different situation and I'm so sorry for what you went through :hugs: 
I hope your OK hunny :flower: congrats on your :bfp: son to be :flower:
xxx


----------



## sequeena

mayb_baby said:


> sequeena said:
> 
> 
> Oh girls :hugs:
> 
> I do believe there are some people out there who are 'depressed' and 'cut' for attention.
> 
> I was a cutter... well I didn't do it religiously or anything. I was sexually abused by my step father for 10 years and when I finally pressed charges I found it very hard to cope with everyone knowing about what happened to me. My sister and niece expected me to just be 'over' it too as I'd had 10 years of it, but I'm not sure how you can be over something when you never had the oppurtunity to speak about it and heal. I spiralled into depression and was put onto anti depressants. The second time I cut I also overdosed. I'm still not quite sure why I did it and can't really remember how it happened. The doctors asked me if I wanted to die and I really didn't want to... I think I just wanted a release, to just escape for a while.
> 
> I conceived a month later, and got my :bfp: the day my abuser was found not guilty. I am very lucky in that I have my partner and my son (even though he isn't born yet).
> 
> I've been to counselling a couple of times but have stopped it since becoming pregnant as I find it much too stressful. I'm lucky in that I've been able to somehow self regulate my moods, I'm very proud I don't need anti d's.
> 
> Now I don't know what will happen in the future but I don't want to ever go back to the dark place again and I never want my son to be hurt like I was. That's just my experience, I can't comment on every single person who has mental issues. Living with someone like me is extremely hard and I can understand the frustration/resentment/lack of pity. :flower:
> 
> Oh and to answer the OP I conceived just over 2 years into our relationship. We've been together nearly 3 years... we basically ttc'd straight away :blush:
> 
> That is a completely different situation and I'm so sorry for what you went through :hugs:
> I hope your OK hunny :flower: congrats on your :bfp: son to be :flower:
> xxxClick to expand...

No worries, I'm a lot better now. I completely regret cutting, not only for what it did to me/my OH but the fact I now have scars that will stay with me for life because of what one person did to me as a child/teenager.

Nothing a bit of bio oil can't fix though I'm sure!!!


----------



## mayb_baby

vinteenage said:


> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> I have no issues either I just hate this poor him when no one here apart from Desi knows him or what he does
> 
> I don't think anyone's actually said "poor him". Just that there may be behind issues to Desi's FOB. I think we've all been pretty clear that this doesn't excuse him. :shrug:Click to expand...
> 
> OK maybe its this yummy wine or the fact its 2.30am but it seems that way when people are telling her to understand when she went through the crap with him.
> 
> Maybe Im more defensive as my relationships shitty but no one mollycoddled my OHs behaviour they all said 'ditch' him. Which I know I should and I havent thats my own issue. I guess Im reading the replies the way I would take themClick to expand...
> 
> But what's done is done, as said commonly in Teen Preg. I absolutely can see and understand why Desi is hurt and angry and I dont think those feelings are wrong in anyway but I don't think that warrants saying she wouldn't care if he died (or whatever, it was similar), that cutting is immature and attention seeking and completely resisting the idea that maybe he's not doing it all for attention but he may have something wrong.
> :flower:Click to expand...

I get that too honestly I do, I just think she is entitled to feel this towards him he abused her, just because he never went to CRAZY extremes of rape/murder/seriously injuring doesnt mean he hasnt emotionally broke her. So yeah I would be hurt reading the well he could have issues replies :flower:


----------



## mayb_baby

sequeena said:


> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> sequeena said:
> 
> 
> Oh girls :hugs:
> 
> I do believe there are some people out there who are 'depressed' and 'cut' for attention.
> 
> I was a cutter... well I didn't do it religiously or anything. I was sexually abused by my step father for 10 years and when I finally pressed charges I found it very hard to cope with everyone knowing about what happened to me. My sister and niece expected me to just be 'over' it too as I'd had 10 years of it, but I'm not sure how you can be over something when you never had the oppurtunity to speak about it and heal. I spiralled into depression and was put onto anti depressants. The second time I cut I also overdosed. I'm still not quite sure why I did it and can't really remember how it happened. The doctors asked me if I wanted to die and I really didn't want to... I think I just wanted a release, to just escape for a while.
> 
> I conceived a month later, and got my :bfp: the day my abuser was found not guilty. I am very lucky in that I have my partner and my son (even though he isn't born yet).
> 
> I've been to counselling a couple of times but have stopped it since becoming pregnant as I find it much too stressful. I'm lucky in that I've been able to somehow self regulate my moods, I'm very proud I don't need anti d's.
> 
> Now I don't know what will happen in the future but I don't want to ever go back to the dark place again and I never want my son to be hurt like I was. That's just my experience, I can't comment on every single person who has mental issues. Living with someone like me is extremely hard and I can understand the frustration/resentment/lack of pity. :flower:
> 
> Oh and to answer the OP I conceived just over 2 years into our relationship. We've been together nearly 3 years... we basically ttc'd straight away :blush:
> 
> That is a completely different situation and I'm so sorry for what you went through :hugs:
> I hope your OK hunny :flower: congrats on your :bfp: son to be :flower:
> xxxClick to expand...
> 
> No worries, I'm a lot better now. I completely regret cutting, not only for what it did to me/my OH but the fact I now have scars that will stay with me for life because of what one person did to me as a child/teenager.
> 
> Nothing a bit of bio oil can't fix though I'm sure!!!Click to expand...

Our scars are what make us no matter how little or deep its how we live and learn from them, we all have them they may not be physical (if they are then yeah Bio Oil lol) but everyone has them xxx


----------



## mayb_baby

AriannasMama said:


> Uhm, I have been a victim of domestic abuse. I've had to go to all the trials seeing the abuser there, I've had to go through dealing with getting orders of protection and worrying that he will retaliate somehow. I understand that she is pissed but I don't think cutting yourself for whatever reason is normal and as a human its normal to feel sympathy for that situation, not even the person him/herself. If I found out today that my ex who I was just talking about had some sort of mental illness and was homeless on the streets of Chicago harming himself I would feel sympathy for that situation.
> 
> Just because you feel hate for that person doesn't mean they don't have a family/loved ones. If your LO was in a similar situation (had a baby and didn't stick around, but was self harming) wouldn't you at least be worried about that part? You need to view things from all perspectives to understand.

Yes but that may come in time, would you of liked people on here to defend your abuser or look at their point of view. I just think we should be here for each other support, if she comes around in time then yeah thats probably best but until she does I think people should respect he hurt her and her LO and not go to such lengths to defend his corner as such x


----------



## x__amour

I have only skimmed but I do have to say self-harming is a sign that something's wrong emotionally or mentally. I rarely see a scenario that they did it for shits and giggles.


----------



## rjb

sam used to be furious when i cut myself. i can't blame him.
(but i did have severe depression, which i still struggle with)
back on topic, on and off for 2 years.


----------



## mayb_baby

OK for the record I don&#8217;t think people self-harm for fun
edit:
Depression (things alike I understand:flower:)
As a threat or to control someone then no I have ZERO pity off to bed it&#8217;s like 3am


----------



## lb

I'm sorry, but can we keep this thread on track? People's feelings are getting hurt, and it's not even on subject.

I was with FOB for a month before we found out I was pregnant.


----------



## QuintinsMommy

we met in January, started dating April 15, and got pregnant 2nd week of may, and we were also broken up the same week lol so about a month.


----------



## amygwen

laurenburch said:


> *I'm sorry, but can we keep this thread on track? People's feelings are getting hurt, and it's not even on subject.*
> I was with FOB for a month before we found out I was pregnant.

Seriously. I agree. 
This is why all the threads get closed all the time because an argument comes out of something that has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with the original post.

:thumbup:


----------



## Desi's_lost

vinteenage said:


> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> vinteenage said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mayb_baby said:
> 
> 
> [
> 
> So no I dont believe mental illness and self-harm is a serious thing no matter who is doing it.
> 
> But doing things like that does fall under a category for a mental disorder. It's sounds like a variant of histrionic personality disorder along with low self esteem.Click to expand...
> 
> Or it could fall under domestic violence https://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/warning_signs.htmlClick to expand...
> 
> But that's still a disorder, still something you go to therapy for, still something that can be fixed with the correct help. :dohh: Abusive personality disorders.Click to expand...


This is before I read the rest of the 3 pages but I just wanted to point something out. Pedophilia is a mental disorder, do you pity them as well?


----------



## x__amour

Oh my fucking God for the love of God. Can we move on? This has already been asked. 

Amy! Kenny's almost one!!! :D
I'll go more in depth. Zach and I were together for a year and 2 months before I concieved on Valentine's Day. :flow:


----------



## amygwen

x__amour said:


> Oh my fucking God for the love of God. Can we move on? This has already been asked.
> 
> Amy! Kenny's almost one!!! :D
> I'll go more in depth. Zach and I were together for a year and 2 months before I concieved on Valentine's Day. :flow:

LOL oh my god, I love you Shannon. 

I know!! I can't believe it, I'm counting down, only 6 days.. 5 days tomorrow!!!!!! OMGGGGGGGGGGG


----------



## Desi's_lost

x__amour said:


> Oh my fucking God for the love of God. Can we move on? This has already been asked.
> 
> Amy! Kenny's almost one!!! :D
> I'll go more in depth. Zach and I were together for a year and 2 months before I concieved on Valentine's Day. :flow:

"This is before I read the rest of the 3 pages" :coffee:


----------



## x__amour

I am currenty drinking some deeellliicccious kool-aid and reading a book called "Exposed". Sad story but a simply great read! :thumbup:


----------



## Callie-xoxox

Shannon I really want to start reading again
Any good books? I love romance haha


----------



## Hotbump

:munch::dance::awww::bike::boat::headspin::shhh::shipw::telephone::icecream::book::juggle::football::bunny::paper::loo:


----------



## AriannasMama

:wacko: oh lordy.


----------



## Hotbump

Hotbump said:


> :munch::dance::awww::bike::boat::headspin::shhh::shipw::telephone::icecream::book::juggle::football::bunny::paper::loo:

i really want some popcorn but we got none, jovanni was just dancing to a beyonce song, and then started to pat jr on the head, im staring at my bike wondering when im going to fix the tire, right now i was watching america's best dance crew, i was telling hubby about the thread lol, then out of no where i told hubby that i need to learn how to swim, my sister wont answer her phone and she has my avon book, now i really want some icecream, thinking about the chapters i have to read for tomorrow and how im going to juggle school and moving out, also thinking its been a long time since i have played soccer, the bunny i just thought it was cute, i was also reading the newspaper searching for a job, and i really have to go to the loo but hubby is in there right now lol


----------



## Hotbump

Im hungry who else is hungry? pizza anyone? i'll invite but somebody else has to pay :rofl:


----------



## Callie-xoxox

Cindy!! I love you! Hahahahah


----------



## Hotbump

Callie-xoxox said:


> Cindy!! I love you! Hahahahah

aww thanks :blush: :haha:


----------



## lb

Cindy, you're my favorite person right now. Hey, you only live an hour away! Let's get pizza sometimes :D


----------



## MommyGrim

I've known OH for about...13 years...lol I grew up with him. We dated for about 10 months about 5 years ago, then we dated again at the end of 09 and were together for a month (when I got pregnant) and then we got back together in March of this year =]


----------



## Hotbump

yes lauren we should get pizza sometime :dance:
mommygrin 13 years wow !


----------



## Hotbump

going night night :sleep: good night everyone! its sleepy bye bye time (like i tell jr and jovanni :haha:) :kiss: sweet dreams everyone :cloud9:


----------



## MommyGrim

Hotbump said:


> mommygrin 13 years wow !

:haha: I know!


----------



## 08marchbean

4 years i think, weve been together 5-6 years now so must have been about 4 years.


----------



## chrissy&marty

:blush: about 4 mnths :blush:
been together 3 and a bit years now xxxx


----------



## holly2234

Got together July 1st 2009 officially. Known each other a year before that. Pregnant the first time January 2010. MC March 2010. Pregnant again June 2010 and Erin was born March 2011. Then its our wedding day on July 1st 2011 :D


----------



## nicole_

unofficially it was 10 months, 
facebook official 5 months :haha: 

i read on fb this thread went off topic but i cba to read if it ever went back on topic so ill just reply with my answer lol


----------



## annawrigley

](*,)](*,)](*,)


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## mayb_baby

:sulk:


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## RachelRae

Me and FOB/OH knew each other our whole lives basically.

Went to preschool together, we have a group photo, lol too cute! In elementary school I was a cheerleader and he played football and I cheered for his team for 5 years. Then we met back up in highschool and clicked! :flower:

xx


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## lily123

RachelRae said:


> Me and FOB/OH knew each other our whole lives basically.
> 
> Went to preschool together, we have a group photo, lol too cute! In elementary school I was a cheerleader and he played football and I cheered for his team for 5 years. Then we met back up in highschool and clicked! :flower:
> 
> xx

You and your OH are the sweetest couple ever! I've had a little peek on your facebook and you're just like the perfect couple from a wedding magazine or something :haha: x


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## amygwen

lily123 said:


> RachelRae said:
> 
> 
> Me and FOB/OH knew each other our whole lives basically.
> 
> Went to preschool together, we have a group photo, lol too cute! In elementary school I was a cheerleader and he played football and I cheered for his team for 5 years. Then we met back up in highschool and clicked! :flower:
> 
> xx
> 
> You and your OH are the sweetest couple ever! I've had a little peek on your facebook and you're just like the perfect couple from a wedding magazine or something :haha: xClick to expand...

LOL it's true!! I was thinking how 'perfect' they are together when I was looking at her photographs on FB. LOL!


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## RachelRae

amygwen said:


> lily123 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> RachelRae said:
> 
> 
> Me and FOB/OH knew each other our whole lives basically.
> 
> Went to preschool together, we have a group photo, lol too cute! In elementary school I was a cheerleader and he played football and I cheered for his team for 5 years. Then we met back up in highschool and clicked! :flower:
> 
> xx
> 
> You and your OH are the sweetest couple ever! I've had a little peek on your facebook and you're just like the perfect couple from a wedding magazine or something :haha: xClick to expand...
> 
> LOL it's true!! I was thinking how 'perfect' they are together when I was looking at her photographs on FB. LOL!Click to expand...

Hahaha!! You guys are too sweet! Thank you. :flower:
Don't think I don't creep on y'alls facebook either! I'm the biggest creeper! Lol :haha:

xx


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## x__amour

Jeeeeeperrs, creeepersss, where'd you get them peepeerrss. :lol:
No, I do the same. Rachel, you guys are seriously the cutest couple. Not to mention you both made one cute babeh! ;)


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## RachelRae

Haha thanks Shannon! You and your man are mighty cute too! You got lucky and had a little girl!! :flower:

Jaxon is sooo white though, like I wish he would just get tanner or something! Lol :haha:

xx


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## Lovleymummy

5 months. Then when fell pregnant with Phoebe. Then relationship crashed :( x


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## bbyno1

RachelRae said:


> Haha thanks Shannon! You and your man are mighty cute too! You got lucky and had a little girl!! :flower:
> 
> Jaxon is sooo white though, like I wish he would just get tanner or something! Lol :haha:
> 
> xx

I wish Aliyah would too:haha:
OH is greek and i have very olive skin and she is quite white.
Then again OH was whittee as a baby and got more and more tanned as the years passed. Aliyah is slowly getting tanned so i hope the same is happening with her lol


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## RachelRae

bbyno1 said:


> RachelRae said:
> 
> 
> Haha thanks Shannon! You and your man are mighty cute too! You got lucky and had a little girl!! :flower:
> 
> Jaxon is sooo white though, like I wish he would just get tanner or something! Lol :haha:
> 
> xx
> 
> I wish Aliyah would too:haha:
> OH is greek and i have very olive skin and she is quite white.
> Then again OH was whittee as a baby and got more and more tanned as the years passed. Aliyah is slowly getting tanned so i hope the same is happening with her lolClick to expand...

Lol, but Jaxon's dad is half black and half white. So that means Jax is 25% black and 75% white but he doesn't look like there's any black in him at all! It makes me mad. Haha, but his daddy was just as white as him when he was a baby and he's mixed so maybe he'll get atleast some color soon!


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## AriannasMama

RachelRae said:


> Haha thanks Shannon! You and your man are mighty cute too! You got lucky and had a little girl!! :flower:
> 
> Jaxon is sooo white though, like I wish he would just get tanner or something! Lol :haha:
> 
> xx

Arianna has just recently started to get darker, she was really white for awhile, lol. It will come though, your OH looks pretty dark so I am sure Jaxon will be nice and tan.


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## Burchy314

Jayden doesn't have any black in her, but shes already tanner then me :dohh:

I have a feeling people are going to mistake her for my older sister when we are older since I know she will end up taller then me haha. She is getting OH's height and skin color. She isnt even going to look like my child haha :dohh:


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## lily123

Esmee is half spanish and she's got lovely olive skin and dark eyes :) i'm the one she got that heritage from, and i'm medium tan, with blue eyes and blonde hair (albeit dyed :haha:) starting to think the mediterranean look skipped a generation :haha:


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## annawrigley

lily123 said:


> Esmee is half spanish and she's got lovely olive skin and dark eyes :) i'm the one she got that heritage from, and i'm medium tan, with blue eyes and blonde hair (albeit dyed :haha:) starting to think the mediterranean look skipped a generation :haha:

Random but I always thought she got her colouring from FOB. Since you like to pretend you're Spanish ;)


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## lily123

annawrigley said:


> lily123 said:
> 
> 
> Esmee is half spanish and she's got lovely olive skin and dark eyes :) i'm the one she got that heritage from, and i'm medium tan, with blue eyes and blonde hair (albeit dyed :haha:) starting to think the mediterranean look skipped a generation :haha:
> 
> Random but I always thought she got her colouring from FOB. Since you like to pretend you're Spanish ;)Click to expand...

:haha: definitely she got her dark eyes from him, i thought maybe she did get her colouring from him for a while, he's such a weird breed :lol: but he's actually whiter than me :wacko: none of his family are dark either... i don't think, i can't tell if his dad is or not as he's a human beard.
Damn you caught me out. Guess it's time to confess that i'm actually a 50 year old swedish man ;)


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## AriannasMama

Its weird cause when I hold Arianna she doesn't look that dark, but when anyone else (even OH and his family) does she looks darker. Though I had her outside yesterday and her legs against mine made mine look even more pasty :haha:


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## Hotbump

jovanni is light medium like me and jr is abit darker but everyone says his skin is getting lighter but i dont see it :shrug: he doesnt look anything like me :haha:


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## lucy_x

i had known OH for 18 months, Our baby was planned :).


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## bbyno1

RachelRae said:


> bbyno1 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> RachelRae said:
> 
> 
> Haha thanks Shannon! You and your man are mighty cute too! You got lucky and had a little girl!! :flower:
> 
> Jaxon is sooo white though, like I wish he would just get tanner or something! Lol :haha:
> 
> xx
> 
> I wish Aliyah would too:haha:
> OH is greek and i have very olive skin and she is quite white.
> Then again OH was whittee as a baby and got more and more tanned as the years passed. Aliyah is slowly getting tanned so i hope the same is happening with her lolClick to expand...
> 
> Lol, but Jaxon's dad is half black and half white. So that means Jax is 25% black and 75% white but he doesn't look like there's any black in him at all! It makes me mad. Haha, but his daddy was just as white as him when he was a baby and he's mixed so maybe he'll get atleast some color soon!Click to expand...

Aw,lol. I have seen lots of light babies that do go darker with age so you never know?My OH was pure white as a baby and now hes got a really nice tan (like olive skin,naturally). Its mad


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