# Desperate for a baby girl please help!!



## hazzabeanie

i have an amazing ds whos 13 months hes my world but ive always had this longing for a baby girl :( i feel bad when i talk about it cause i wouldnt change my ds for anything he just so gorgeous :)

im getting married in may and i want to start ttc after my wedding day but i feel this urge that if i dont have a girl il be really disapointed i no this is an awful way to think but i just cant help it.

4 of my friends are pregnant and i just have a feeling there having girls.

just really would like some advice and if anyone else has ever felt like this? xxx

:flower:


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## Hippietea

Hi, you're not alone, lots of people feel this way. The subject often causes a lot of arguments in forums but there is such a thing as gender disappointment, you can google it for info. Contrary to what many will say on the subject it doesn't mean you are a bad mother or that you won't love your child whatever gender it is, so don't feel bad.


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## hazzabeanie

thanks hun, oh dont get me wrong if i was to have another boy i would be overjoyed, but i just have this feeling that i may never have a girl, i dont want to cause arguments with people as as long as babys healthy im happy, just plays on my mind and wondered what others had felt.

thanks for your reply i really appreciate it xx


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## midori1999

Why do you want a girl? What makes you think a girl will be any different to a boy? 

I think it's probably a good idea to have some counselling prior to TTC.


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## Odd Socks

i felt the same way when i was pregnant, even before i was pregnant i wanted a girl. it might seem silly & irrational to most, but i've always pictured myself having a girl.
i was never worried i wouldn't love a boy as much as a girl, that didn't cross my mind at all. it's so hard to explain without seeming ungrateful for having a healthy pregnancy in the first place. we were trying for quite a while before i got pregnant, i was always grateful that i managed it in the end, but in the back of my mind, i still wanted to hear the sonographer at my 20 week scan tell me she was a girl.
xx


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## sophxx

IT very norml to feel like that i had my heart set on a girl just because i was nervous to have a boy thats all now i have the most fantastic little boy in the world and i wouldnt change him for anything i to would like a little girl next time but if its a boy i would be mor than happy

xx


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## Bumpontherun

I felt like this in my last pregnancy. It is hard to explain, I've just always pictured myself with a little girl. I convinced myself that I was having a boy the whole way through so I would be used to the idea and not be disapointed. I was absolutely thrilled when she came out and I realised I had my little girl. It's totally normal, you're not alone and I don't think you need counselling. Of course we would love our babies no matter what and we are just grateful for a healthy baby but if you've always dreamed of something you can't just switch that off. I hope you get your little girl next time round:flower: Although your wee boy is gorgeous :)


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## hazzabeanie

midori1999 said:


> Why do you want a girl? What makes you think a girl will be any different to a boy?
> 
> I think it's probably a good idea to have some counselling prior to TTC.

thanks for your comment, i dont think i need counselling as i have a wonderful ds who i love dearly and if i was to be blessed with another ds i would also love dearly!! i would not be disapointed if it was another boy, i just always as a little girl myself dreamed id have a baby girl, and i just cant shake the feeling of wanting one thats all.

i would never love my ds any less because hes a boy nor would i if i was to have another boy, i would be overjoyed either way.

i just wanted some advice and :hugs: from people who new how i was feeling xxx

:flower::flower::flower:


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## Charmaine1

I know the feeling. I have a boy already, and this is going to be my last pregnancy so I'm really wanting a girl too. I'll still love another boy, but one boy and one girl is what I REALLY REALLY want. 

And I don't think anyone needs counciling for wanting a specific gender. How come thats never even suggested when someone says the want a boy? But when someone wants a girl, its somehow wrong?:shrug:


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## FirstBean

I really really wanted a boy with my first and was very lucky that I was having one so I understand what you are saying. With my next one I am not really bothered will be happy with either as long as its healthy.


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## hazzabeanie

Charmaine1 said:


> I know the feeling. I have a boy already, and this is going to be my last pregnancy so I'm really wanting a girl too. I'll still love another boy, but one boy and one girl is what I REALLY REALLY want.
> 
> And I don't think anyone needs counciling for wanting a specific gender. How come thats never even suggested when someone says the want a boy? But when someone wants a girl, its somehow wrong?:shrug:


fingers crossed u get a baby girl this time :) this will prob be my last baby (when i ttc after the wedding) so its just the thought that i may never have a baby girl, but like u i would still be happy if i had a healthy baby boy :) xxxx


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## ClaireMuir123

Oh, I could have written this post! In my last pregnancy I wasn't too bothered about the sex so I stayed on Team Yellow the full way through, even though I had that mothers instinct and I knew I was having a boy. And my son is amazing, he's really well behaved (mostly lol) advanced for his age and just an absolute delight!

But this pregnancy I would really like a girl! I won't be disappointed if I have another boy but I just have to know the sex of it! So much so, I'm having a scan on Saturday! Lol.

There's a website www.in-gender.com that supports gender disappointment. Although I wouldn't say that's what you have/will have lol. They also show ways of 'swaying' for a girl xxx


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## Nyn

I know exactly how you feel hunny. I have 2 little boys who are my whole world and I love more than anything. But.... I am dreaming of having a daughter. For as long as I can remember I just always thought I'd have a daughter. One of my closest friends has 2 girls and I hate myself for the jealousy I sometimes feel towards her. 

I'm on my third pregnancy and I'm very very nervous about finding out the sex - which I will do as soon as I can. I'm aware that by already having 2 boys chances are I'll have a 3rd boy but I am hoping against hope that it's a girl. I will be very upset if it's a boy. I hope that no one will start bashing me for saying that. I feel racked with guilt every time I think these thoughts but they are real and you're not alone. I had this when pregnant with ds2, and I think it's worse this time round.

All that said though, I will of course love my baby no matter, completely and utterly. But yeah.. I'll always think 'what if..' 

so yeah..:hugs: to you hun, and anyone else going through this. Don't beat yourself up. It helps a lot going onto gender dissappointment forums and realising you're not alone. believe me. 

please everyone, if you don't have something nice to say please don't say anything at all. thank you.

feel free to pm me if you need to :hugs:


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## TwilightAgain

Sorry I have no advice for you, just wanted to say your little boy is absolutely gorgeous! :)

If you were to conceive another boy, just think of how awesome it would be for him to have a little brother!

Ohhh and if it got to the point where you were desperate for a little lady, maybe you could adopt if baby no2 happened to be a little man too. Just because you don't conceive a little lady doesn't mean you'll never have one! :flower: (though i'm not sure if you get to choose the gender when adopting having said that).


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## Mrs-C

I can understand. We originally were hoping this LO would be a boy, as all the kids are girls so far in DH's family. We're last and wanted something to be different for us.

Before we found out I gave it some real thought and realised I wanted at least one girl (we plan on stopping at two). When they said we were having a girl this time I was just happy that I'd get at least one, didn't have a second thought about how we originally were thinking boy. It feels right to me now, I'm used to it.

Next time I would like a boy, to have one of each is what I always pictured - probably because it's worked out that way in both of our families. I think DH would love a son and I'd like the opportunity to name him after my grandfather. Having said that - I would be just as happy with another future shopping buddy!

I think there is a thing still where we feel men like to have a son to be blokey with and us girls to have daughters to be girly with.


I'm sure that if you found out at your 20 week scan you would have plenty of time to get used to the idea and by the time baby came, you would be fine. For me, it made it all the more real. Now if you told me a boy was in there, I think I'd find it strange after calling her by her name and picturing a little girl!

:hugs:


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## KateyCakes

Isn't there a way to 'sway' towards a certain gender? Me + my OH looked into it when we were TTC. 
You're supposed to have sex at a certain time/certain position etc :wacko: https://howtoconceiveagirl.org/
Obviously it's not 100% or anything like that, but there's no harm in trying.


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## bobblebot

@ midori, i hate to say it butgirla are very different to boys, i have three boys, 14, 16 and 3 and two girls 13 and 18 and a baby girl on way.

My girlswhen little had different personalities but i have found girls tend to be more independant when younger but as get older become closer to mums and eventually best friends and tend to stik around as they get older.

Boys are more loving when littlei have found, but as get older do get more distant and more likley spendmore time at girlfriends and eventual in laws place.

Ilove all my kids but i'm so glad i had girls as getting older now girlsdo remain closer.

I am daughter of a mother with two sisters and one brother and i see it true here,all the girls stayed close to gran/mum, meeting up regularly, shopping etc...i loved my childhood with all my aunts BUT my uncle i hardly saw just at xmas as he spend most time with his inlaws/wife's family.

I love all my kids but i have to admit i really wanted this baby to be a girl and i couldn't imagine getting older without having had my daughters.

As for swaying for a girl....the theory is that you have sex more than 2 days before your period and not in the two days leading to ovulation. Reason being girl sperm are longer lasting, slower plodders so whilst the boy sperm race off to meet the egg they then die off early waiting for egg,meanwhile the girl sperm take their time and then wait around for the egg tocomeand hey presto! 

I found thid true as i only hadsex once about five days before ovulation, thought i would be safe as not TTC...and lo behold girly spermobviously was very long lasting and i got pregnant....amaing but it does seem to work.


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## Septie

I am pregnant with our second boy, and am quite happy (I was really truly indifferent prior to finding out about this one's gender; prior to our first, I always wanted a girl, but am now so in love with our son that I can't imagine anything better). I think it will be terrific for my kids to be of the same gender (they will be under 2 years apart): My brother and I played really well together, but only up to the age of about 10/11 - as teenagers we had NOTHING in common...On the other hand, my nephews did activities together all throughout their teenage years.

Bobblebot - that's funny that you've experienced more closeness between girls/mothers than between boys/mothers: Except perhaps during the teenage years (when sons tend to be more withdrawn), I've observed the opposite: Daughters fighting with their mothers; sons staying close by long-term, weekly get togethers w/ parents throughout their 20s/30/s (I don't really have observations later in life than that), frequent phone calls for advice etc (and girlfriends envious of the close mom/son relationship). Not just in our extended family, but also in the families of ex-boyfriends, girlfriends and such. Too many examples to list (and very few, if any the other way around). Lots of what they would call in Italy "momma's boys" (and no, we are not Italian). I am hoping for a bit of that with my sons (but yeah, I am not looking forward to the "quiet, withdrawn" teenage years).


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## cowboys angel

I really wanted this one to be a girl. It sounds really bad though, because part of my reason was cuz my first angel baby was always in my head a girl. I know this is a different baby, but a lot of the same dreams I had when I lost that baby are returning during this pregnancy, and part of me wants to believe that it's my first baby's spirit. I know it sounds dumb, please no snarky comments, just saying that I understand. 

All through the beginning of this pregnancy I was sure I was having a girl. And I knew I was going to cry if it was a boy. I'd still be overjoyed that I had a child cuz I've had two losses and I just want a baby I can hold and love, but I was just convinced I would cry if it was a boy and that I was a bad mother for thinking that way.

I was proven right though at the anatomy ultrasound, I am having a little girl, and I am overjoyed. If she comes out a boy, which I know there's always a chance they were wrong, I will still be on :cloud9: if I have a boy, but I am so ecstatic that I am having my little girl finally.


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## Catters

Counseling? Really? ... :roll: Everyone deserves the right to have a preference.

I hope you get what gender you prefer and that the baby is healthy. :hugs: Best of luck to you! :flower:


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## midori1999

bobblebot said:


> @ midori, i hate to say it butgirla are very different to boys, i have three boys, 14, 16 and 3 and two girls 13 and 18 and a baby girl on way.
> 
> My girlswhen little had different personalities but i have found girls tend to be more independant when younger but as get older become closer to mums and eventually best friends and tend to stik around as they get older.
> 
> Boys are more loving when littlei have found, but as get older do get more distant and more likley spendmore time at girlfriends and eventual in laws place.
> 
> Ilove all my kids but i'm so glad i had girls as getting older now girlsdo remain closer.
> 
> I am daughter of a mother with two sisters and one brother and i see it true here,all the girls stayed close to gran/mum, meeting up regularly, shopping etc...i loved my childhood with all my aunts BUT my uncle i hardly saw just at xmas as he spend most time with his inlaws/wife's family.
> 
> I love all my kids but i have to admit i really wanted this baby to be a girl and i couldn't imagine getting older without having had my daughters.
> 
> As for swaying for a girl....the theory is that you have sex more than 2 days before your period and not in the two days leading to ovulation. Reason being girl sperm are longer lasting, slower plodders so whilst the boy sperm race off to meet the egg they then die off early waiting for egg,meanwhile the girl sperm take their time and then wait around for the egg tocomeand hey presto!
> 
> I found thid true as i only hadsex once about five days before ovulation, thought i would be safe as not TTC...and lo behold girly spermobviously was very long lasting and i got pregnant....amaing but it does seem to work.

My own experience is very different to your, but surely the above can only apply if you think all girls are the same and all boys are the same? 

My ex MIL desperately wanted a girl after her three sons. She is extremely close to her sons as well as her daughter, but everything she hoped her daughter would be doesn't apply, she is exactly like her brothers and wouldn't wear a dress if her life depended on it. 



Catters said:


> Counseling? Really? ... :roll: Everyone deserves the right to have a preference.
> 
> I hope you get what gender you prefer and that the baby is healthy. :hugs: Best of luck to you! :flower:


Um yes, because gender disappointment is a recognised problem that counselling can help.

There's a difference betwen having a preference and thinking you'll be disappointed or upset if you don't get the gender you want.


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## Catters

midori1999 said:


> bobblebot said:
> 
> 
> @ midori, i hate to say it butgirla are very different to boys, i have three boys, 14, 16 and 3 and two girls 13 and 18 and a baby girl on way.
> 
> My girlswhen little had different personalities but i have found girls tend to be more independant when younger but as get older become closer to mums and eventually best friends and tend to stik around as they get older.
> 
> Boys are more loving when littlei have found, but as get older do get more distant and more likley spendmore time at girlfriends and eventual in laws place.
> 
> Ilove all my kids but i'm so glad i had girls as getting older now girlsdo remain closer.
> 
> I am daughter of a mother with two sisters and one brother and i see it true here,all the girls stayed close to gran/mum, meeting up regularly, shopping etc...i loved my childhood with all my aunts BUT my uncle i hardly saw just at xmas as he spend most time with his inlaws/wife's family.
> 
> I love all my kids but i have to admit i really wanted this baby to be a girl and i couldn't imagine getting older without having had my daughters.
> 
> As for swaying for a girl....the theory is that you have sex more than 2 days before your period and not in the two days leading to ovulation. Reason being girl sperm are longer lasting, slower plodders so whilst the boy sperm race off to meet the egg they then die off early waiting for egg,meanwhile the girl sperm take their time and then wait around for the egg tocomeand hey presto!
> 
> I found thid true as i only hadsex once about five days before ovulation, thought i would be safe as not TTC...and lo behold girly spermobviously was very long lasting and i got pregnant....amaing but it does seem to work.
> 
> My own experience is very different to your, but surely the above can only apply if you think all girls are the same and all boys are the same?
> 
> My ex MIL desperately wanted a girl after her three sons. She is extremely close to her sons as well as her daughter, but everything she hoped her daughter would be doesn't apply, she is exactly like her brothers and wouldn't wear a dress if her life depended on it.
> 
> 
> 
> Catters said:
> 
> 
> Counseling? Really? ... :roll: Everyone deserves the right to have a preference.
> 
> I hope you get what gender you prefer and that the baby is healthy. :hugs: Best of luck to you! :flower:Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Um yes, because gender disappointment is a recognised problem that counselling can help.
> 
> There's a difference betwen having a preference and thinking you'll be disappointed or upset if you don't get the gender you want.Click to expand...

Maybe you should have stated that in your initial post... telling someone to seek counseling right out of the shoot is a bit OTT. :wacko:

As you can see, OP clearly stated on page 1 that she wouldn't be disappointed if she were to have another boy, as she is very happy with her son. I'm sorry.. I could have misinterpreted but I read her post as a "preference" (which is completely normal) rather than an "it's the end of the world if this happens.." Just sayin'.


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## cowboys angel

Just gotta say "kudos" to Catters


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## midori1999

Catters said:


> Catters said:
> 
> 
> Counseling? Really? ... :roll: Everyone deserves the right to have a preference.
> 
> I hope you get what gender you prefer and that the baby is healthy. :hugs: Best of luck to you! :flower:
> 
> 
> Um yes, because gender disappointment is a recognised problem that counselling can help.
> 
> There's a difference betwen having a preference and thinking you'll be disappointed or upset if you don't get the gender you want.Click to expand...

Maybe you should have stated that in your initial post... telling someone to seek counseling right out of the shoot is a bit OTT. :wacko:

As you can see, OP clearly stated on page 1 that she wouldn't be disappointed if she were to have another boy, as she is very happy with her son. I'm sorry.. I could have misinterpreted but I read her post as a "preference" (which is completely normal) rather than an "it's the end of the world if this happens.." Just sayin'.[/QUOTE]


When I posted originally, the OP had only posted her first post, which said (and I quote) 

"but i feel this urge that if i dont have a girl il be really disapointed"

I can only go by what she has written, I am not psychic. 

Surely counselling would help the OP understand why exactly she would be disappointed and how to deal with that? Better to do it before there's an actual baby and post pregnancy hormones involved.


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## JaniceT

This is probably my one and only pregnancy as it took years to conceive. I had also prefered a girl because I naturally would do all the 'girl' things with her. However I will be having a boy. For some time, I was worried because I have absolutely no idea what to do! Have told my Hubby and he's helped by giving me ideas such as he'll take him out golfing and we can go fishing by the river or pond. 

Also, I have noticed the same happening here in South East Asia as what BobbleBot mentioned. Daughters stay close as family while sons leave to be with their GF/wife/in laws. Very, very common.


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## Ladybird28

I know exactly how the OP feels. My 3rd boy is nearly 15 weeks old now and I absolutely adore him but I have to confess that when I found out at the scan that it was yet another boy I spent a few days being very upset. As he is my last baby it is so hard to have to come to terms with the fact that I will never have a daughter or experience the mother/daughter relationship. To be honest, I will never get over it.
I can highly recommend the In-gender website as it is full of sympathetic people and you will not be judged or critisised for your feelings. Its also full of great tips to sway for a girl ...... doesnt do any harm to try and tip the scales does it! 

ps and I have to agree with the above post, in my experience boys do tend to grow away from their mothers as they get older where as girls relationships with their mothers deepen and get closer.


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## poppy666

I already have 4 boys aged 18,19,20 and 11mths and with my 4th for obvious reason i so wished for a little girl and could even hear myself say 'please be a girl' at my 20wk scan, but when she said 'boy' i held how i felt in till i got home and admit i cried and to be honest im not bothered what anyone says i was upset and it took me 8wks after that scan to buy anything blue for baby, but Korben is here now and ive never loved as much as i do him :cloud9: 

Im TTC one last time more for a playmate for him as really with the older 3 brothers he's on his own 'bless' and this time i dont care what sex is as long as its a sticky as i MMC'd at christmas, but wont deny my family would be complete if its finally a little girl :happydance:


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## Aleksandra Dr

any other way they are a bless!


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## MissRoxie

I don't think its wrong whatsoever to imagine yourself with a certain gender... I always imagined having a little boy even though with my family history I knew it would be a girl, just knew but convinced myself it was a boy purely because thats what I had saw! It took me a while to get round to the idea after finding out her sex at my scan, maybe a couple of weeks and now shes nearly here and I couldn't be happier! At the end of the day hun, you have a gorgeous wee boy and I hope you get a girl too!


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## Freya

midori1999 said:


> Why do you want a girl? What makes you think a girl will be any different to a boy?
> 
> I think it's probably a good idea to have some counselling prior to TTC.

Urggh. I won't even begin to start with this post and poster. :growlmad:

Op, there are plenty here to support you in how you feel, which is understandable. Fingers crossed you get your girl. If I'm honest I would love this baby to be a girl, how greedy am I?? Xxxx


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## Kim T

I definitely understand how you feel.

My son is 18 months old and although part of me wanted this one to be a boy for him to have a little brother to play with, the other part wanted a girl as my OH says this is the last baby and i would like to have one of each.

Turns out that this little peanut is a boy and now i couldn't be happier. But when i first found out, all i could think was how i would never have that mother/daughter relationship and never get to buy cute little pink dresses!! 
And it was made worse by SIL giving birth to a little girl and also naming her the name we had chosen if we were to have a girl!!

But who knows.. I might get another chance to try for a girl. And if not, i will have two amazing little men in my life who are my absolute world and i wouldn't change for anything.
And i'm sure that if you happen to end up with two little boys, you will feel exactly the same!

Congrats on your wedding btw.
:flower:


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## Nataliexx

I have 3 boys and i always wanted a girl. So this time before we started to TTC i looked up ingender website (Great website) and i followed most things on swaying to get a girl. It worked for me and i am soooooo happy and thankful i tried it :)


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## hazzabeanie

oh wow thanks for all your replies ladies youve made me feel loads better :) im going to have a look at that website for when we try, theres no harm in giving it a go :) xxxxxx


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## midori1999

Freya said:


> midori1999 said:
> 
> 
> Why do you want a girl? What makes you think a girl will be any different to a boy?
> 
> I think it's probably a good idea to have some counselling prior to TTC.
> 
> Urggh. I won't even begin to start with this post and poster. :growlmad:
> 
> Op, there are plenty here to support you in how you feel, which is understandable. Fingers crossed you get your girl. If I'm honest I would love this baby to be a girl, how greedy am I?? XxxxClick to expand...

That's nice. There's no need to get personal about a 'poster' is there? Surely counselling _is_ support? 

At no point did I say it was wrong to have a preference for a certain gender, nor critiscise the OP. Letting someone know there is counselling available for this type of thing when they may not realise it is a recognised problem (gender disappointment) is potentially helpful. Obviously the OP feels she is not at the stage where she would need counselling, as her later post explained. 

The fact is, people do have preferences based on their own experiences and expectations (quite a few posters here have said that they feel girls are closer to their Mums etc and in fact, I have a couple of friend's who would want or hope to be carrying a girl for the same reasons, along with the 'dress up' ones) and research has shown that this can cause real problems when people get the gender they wanted but things do not turn out as they expected. Hence, specific counselling is even available.


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## Freya

Midori: you KNOW exactly why you received my dismissive response, back track and 'defend' your post all you like because for me, 'on that day, not one single fc-uk was given!


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## MissRoxie

Theres no need for this at the end of the day everyone will have a different way of dealing with things and different views, just because you don't agree with someone elses views doesn't mean it has to turn into an argument :flower:

Cuppa anyone? :coffee:


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## midori1999

Freya said:


> Midori: you KNOW exactly why you received my dismissive response, back track and 'defend' your post all you like because for me, 'on that day, not one single fc-uk was given!

Actually, I don't know why at all and you're not really making much sense. Perhaps if you have a particular grudge you can take it to PM as I have no clue what you are on about. 

I am not defending anything, if you knew anything about me you would know that I stand by what I say and think with utter conviction at all times. I have explained why I posted what I did, because it is clear that it has been misinterpreted. 

However, perhaps you can point out to me where I critiscised the OP in any way at all in my original (or any other!) post on this thread? 



MissRoxie said:


> Theres no need for this at the end of the day everyone will have a different way of dealing with things and different views, just because you don't agree with someone elses views doesn't mean it has to turn into an argument :flower:
> 
> Cuppa anyone? :coffee:

The point is, I haven't got a 'different view' to the OP. (Well, I have in that I don't care less what gender my baby is because, having lost twin daughters after they were born prematurely and also having a 7 year old with Downs Syndrome, I'll be happy to take 'alive' over any gender or percieved disability) That is aside though, they are my own personal feelings, for me. I never, at any point, said anyone was wrong. In fact, I have said the opposite.


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## bobblebot

i have to add to my original post that my last child, which i believed was my last i desperately wanted a girl and he was a boy...and i have no regrets he is so so so loving.

I also want to add i know some boys do stay very close to their mums and what i said is a sweeping generalisation but it is just my experience.


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## Freya

I feel that if midori can not express kindness or a level of understanding to someone starting a thread with her honest feelings, then just don't post. It's unhelpful and plain rude. I've noticed a couple of her posts with this tone. I respect we have different opinions, I haven't got time for unnecessary rudeness and abruptness. So expect to be treated as you treat others.

I certainly won't be 'taking it to pm' because I am not interested in having a dialogue, sorry, its just not that important. This is not why I joined thus forum nearly 3 years back.


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## MissRoxie

midori1999 said:


> Freya said:
> 
> 
> Midori: you KNOW exactly why you received my dismissive response, back track and 'defend' your post all you like because for me, 'on that day, not one single fc-uk was given!
> 
> Actually, I don't know why at all and you're not really making much sense. Perhaps if you have a particular grudge you can take it to PM as I have no clue what you are on about.
> 
> I am not defending anything, if you knew anything about me you would know that I stand by what I say and think with utter conviction at all times. I have explained why I posted what I did, because it is clear that it has been misinterpreted.
> 
> However, perhaps you can point out to me where I critiscised the OP in any way at all in my original (or any other!) post on this thread?
> 
> 
> 
> MissRoxie said:
> 
> 
> Theres no need for this at the end of the day everyone will have a different way of dealing with things and different views, just because you don't agree with someone elses views doesn't mean it has to turn into an argument :flower:
> 
> Cuppa anyone? :coffee:Click to expand...
> 
> The point is, I haven't got a 'different view' to the OP. (Well, I have in that I don't care less what gender my baby is because, having lost twin daughters after they were born prematurely and also having a 7 year old with Downs Syndrome, I'll be happy to take 'alive' over any gender or percieved disability) That is aside though, they are my own personal feelings, for me. I never, at any point, said anyone was wrong. In fact, I have said the opposite.Click to expand...

I wasn't talking about the OP nor was I even talking to you in the first place.


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## hazzabeanie

I didn't really want this post to start an argument or debate to be honest like post said I was just wanting hugs really, middori I must admit that upon reading ur reply I was a little upset because i don't think I need counciling before ttc as I won't be upset if I was to have another boy, it kind of come across a little rude, like I was wrong to feel the way I do but everyone is entitled to there own opinion hence why I never said anything. 

I appreciate Everyones opinions and I feel that I can post for help or advice whatever my feelings because this is generally what everybody is here for :)

I'm really sorry that you have had a tough time, and I am very grateful boy or girl!!! Xxx


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## Freya

Sorry my post upset you hazzabeanie!!! I should have thought more about that.

Xxxxxx hugs xxxxx


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## to many boys

Nataliexx said:


> I have 3 boys and i always wanted a girl. So this time before we started to TTC i looked up ingender website (Great website) and i followed most things on swaying to get a girl. It worked for me and i am soooooo happy and thankful i tried it :)

Congrats natalie, just curious what method you used? im considereing the 0+12 method and douching


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## Ozzieshunni

I think sometimes having one boy and one girl is just seen as having a balance as you have one of each :shrug: It would be nice in a perfect world, but I'm glad you'll be happy with either. I think the issue comes in when you are fixated on one, which OP is obviously not and I did get that from the first post.

As for the particular poster, I've seen her before and she does this on other threads so I'm not fussed :flower:


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## Treelo

I havent read all the replies:blush:

I have 2 boys and i would love a little girl, that doesn't mean i love them any less when pregnant with them i wanted boys and was so happy when i was told its a boy at the gender scans. Also if this baby is a boy i will be also be very happy and he will be loved very much and my older 2 will be very happy.
My friend has 3 girls and would to have a boy, i think if you have 1/2 or more of same gender every one gets a longing for the opposite its normal. But i think all we do want is a healthy baby at the end of the day.
Good luck TTC xxx


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## Andypanda6570

There is nothing wrong with wanting a girl, it only becomes a problem if you reject the baby if it is a boy and you don't fall into that category to me .
I have 3 boys 20,17 and 11 and at 40 I got pregnant and was in total shock, we were done , but let me tell you I was over the moon with joy :cloud9: I lost Ava 7 weeks ago at 18 weeks and she was the girl I never in a million years thought I would have. When I was pregnant I did want a girl sooooo bad I am not going to lye who would not after 3 boys, but I would have loved that baby no matter what , but there is nothing nothing wrong with hoping and wanting girl and don't let anyone tell you different. All The Best xoxoxo :hugs::hugs:


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## emily86

Its a tough one isn't it - you never dare to say you would like one gender or another for fear of upsetting people.

I have a 5 year old son and thought we were having another boy, when we got told it was a girl at our scan, I felt oddly weird, everyone was telling me how cool it is to have one of each etc etc but I had this picture set out in my head of 2 little boys playing and growing up together and I really thought I would be more excited about having a girl than I actually was.

I am more worried as i'm such a 'boy' mum and haven't a clue about girls tbh.
But now i've come round to the idea and am looking forward to having a daughter.

People will feel this way when pregnant, the gender of your child is a massive thing and having mixed feelings don't mean you will love that baby any less.

I hope you get a pink bump hun xx


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## IHrtSteve

Thats normal. Ive been there too. Unfortunately we have no control over it! Good luck


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## lovejoy

I don't know why, but the chinese lunar calendar if done correctly is right everytime, so weird.
Men have gender disappointment too and no one is mad at them.
Honestly how many of us have men dreaming and praying for a son? My OH didn't say it but I could tell he was a little disappointed when they said IT'S A GIRL ,he said to me congratulation? and sometimes made comments when she cried that annoyed me" I bet a boy wouldn't cry as muchW(he thinks boys are easier?)Hello, all babies cry! His a moron sometime, but my point was don't feel bad.I was soo worried to have a boy I would like two girls and then maybe a boy later for him but I don't have a want for a boy like I did with my daughter and before I was pregnant I didn't care what I had I just wanted a health baby.


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## queenlavera

Took two years ttc to get to this pregnancy, and it is a boy. I am happy but I feel like he is really for DH. I hope I get another chance to have a girl. I always imagined my family having one of each. I think there is nothing wrong to want to experience both sides, I look forward to doing all the stuff that comes with either of them.


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## Ozzieshunni

This thread is from before I had Alex lol.


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## pinklightbulb

This thread is a little old lol but I feel I would like a little girl this time around, I don't think it's selfish cause a pidgeon pair is what most of us would imagine in our minds with two children, isn't it? :)


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## poppy666

poppy666 said:


> I already have 4 boys aged 18,19,20 and 11mths and with my 4th for obvious reason i so wished for a little girl and could even hear myself say 'please be a girl' at my 20wk scan, but when she said 'boy' i held how i felt in till i got home and admit i cried and to be honest im not bothered what anyone says i was upset and it took me 8wks after that scan to buy anything blue for baby, but Korben is here now and ive never loved as much as i do him :cloud9:
> 
> Im TTC one last time more for a playmate for him as really with the older 3 brothers he's on his own 'bless' and this time i dont care what sex is as long as its a sticky as i MMC'd at christmas, but wont deny my family would be complete if its finally a little girl :happydance:

:haha: old post, buttttttttttttttttttttttttt having a girl :happydance::happydance::happydance:


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## pinklightbulb

^ Congratulations! Hope I can come back to this thread and say that :haha:


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## Treelo

Treelo said:


> I havent read all the replies:blush:
> 
> I have 2 boys and i would love a little girl, that doesn't mean i love them any less, when pregnant with them i wanted boys and was so happy when i was told its a boy at the gender scans. Also if this baby is a boy i will be also be very happy and he will be loved very much and my older 2 will be very happy.
> My friend has 3 girls and would to have a boy, i think if you have 1/2 or more of same gender every one gets a longing for the opposite its normal. But i think all we do want is a healthy baby at the end of the day.
> Good luck TTC xxx

Just updating this as according to the last 3 scans i have had this baby is a girl :)


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## poppy666

Awww congratulations too :happydance:


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## Praying4O

hazzabeanie said:


> i have an amazing ds whos 13 months hes my world but ive always had this longing for a baby girl :( i feel bad when i talk about it cause i wouldnt change my ds for anything he just so gorgeous :)
> 
> im getting married in may and i want to start ttc after my wedding day but i feel this urge that if i dont have a girl il be really disapointed i no this is an awful way to think but i just cant help it.
> 
> 4 of my friends are pregnant and i just have a feeling there having girls.
> 
> just really would like some advice and if anyone else has ever felt like this? xxx
> 
> :flower:

ive heard that if you dont get off during intercourse you higher your chances of having a girl because the male sperm dont swim well in an acidic climate and the girls prefer the acidic climate. idk tho lol :flower:


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## Bubblesnbits

Dont listen to "them" who give out if you say you would prefer a girl!! I have had 3 miscarriages but I refuse to be one of those people that blabber on about "thanking god that the baby is just healthy" bc as far as I am concerned, if there is a god he wouldnt damage your baby just bc you preferred a gender!!

everyone has a preference deep down, no matter how they try and argue it, the ones that say there dont are full of ****


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## babyblog

midori1999 said:


> Why do you want a girl? What makes you think a girl will be any different to a boy?
> 
> I think it's probably a good idea to have some counselling prior to TTC.

Why is the OP not allowed to want a girl, and of course a daughter is different to a son :wacko: I dint think she needs counselling for expressing a perfernece in sex !


Edit. jus seen this thread is ancient !


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## Ozzieshunni

This is an oooooooooooooooold post.


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## pinklightbulb

Yup lol and I'm having my second son! I did promise to update.... :haha:


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## GizmonGremlin

I know this is old but...

I think its perfectly normal while ttc or first finding out your expecting to imagine having a boy or girl and even having a preference. 

When we started ttc I wanted a boy sooooo badly I could literally imagine it. I have two girls from a previous relationship and they adore df to pieces and he adores them but it was me who had the boy preference because I wanted a mini df and a boy would be different and who doesnt want a mamas boy. LOL We are having a girl, and when we found out df was shocked but only because there are zero females in his family, its all boys so he genuinely thought it would be a boy. Once he got over the "OMG I made a girl" he was on his cell phone so fast while I was with the dr that he managed to tell like 20 people before I even managed to tell my mother. LOL Now we are having tons of fun buying lots of "I Love Daddy" or "Daddys Girl" stuff. It tickles me to buy that stuff just for him.


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