# At What age would you leave your kids alone



## Angelicous

Hi

I'm a teacher and one of my foreign student has asked at what age you can leave a child alone.

She has a 5 year old and an 11 year old. She says she occasionally leaves her kids alone to go to the opera in the evening (so quite late).

My kids are 6 and 4 so the nearest I get to leaving my children alone is going into the garden while they watch TV. 

Her son has only just started secondary school and it seems a little young to me but where she comes from you get latch key kids from primary school age. 

What do you all think?


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## Dinoslass

I think that is too young. I didn't even let my kids alone when they were 11, so go figure. It all does depend on the child of course, but for me not at those ages. And not a whole evening to go out. I mean if they are 11 and they are up to it an hour to pop out could be okay, but not at 5, that is ridiculous. 
I remember one mother let her 5 and 7 year old come home for lunch on their own every day and I was shocked. I mean kids at that age shouldn't be having all that responsability.


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## lozzy21

I had my own key at 10 and used to come home with one of my brothers who is 3 years younger than me. But not for long. Id say i was 13/14 before i started to babysit for more than an hour or so but that was for 3 childen, one 3 years younger, one 8 years younger and one 9 years younger.

An 11 year old would be to young to look after a 5 year old on an night for that long imo


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## mrso

It is against the law in the US to leave a child alone under the age of 12. I think that 13/14 would be a more appropriate age though.


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## Freyasmum

It's against the law here (NZ) to leave any child under 14 alone.
Having said that, my sister was younger than that when we used to get home from school unsupervised...


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## Nic1107

Is it really illegal here?! Hmmm, oh well! I used walk home at 10-11 years old and be home alone for awhile until my dad got home. *shrug* I was a sensible kid though, and very self-sufficient. I started baby-sitting at 12... this was only 12 years ago, not really long enough to say it was a different era then. I grew up thinking my mom was overprotective, but I guess I was pretty unsupervised compared to kids now!


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## CeliaM

When I was 12, I babysat 3 times a week for a 5yr old, 2yr old, and 6month old. I fed them supper, took them to the park, then put them to bed. Then I'd clean up their house and do my homework till 10pm, when they came home and drove me home. All for a measly 3 dollars and hour (not that that's significant to the thread, but now that I know better, I'm bitter at how underpaid I was!). I did take the responsibility seriously though, and had taken first aid training and was good with the kids.

Anyways, now that I have kids at exact same age, I can say that I think it's nuts to leave that much to a 12 year old! I never would. I have friends kids come over and "babysit" them, but only when I'm home and just needing time to get things done. I'm always available if need be. 

It depends so much on the kid though. Children are capable of so much more than we give them credit for, if they're trained by their parents to handle it. If the 11 yr old is responsible, there is someone within a close geograpical area that they can contact if need be, then I think it's fine. I'm pretty sure that in my province, babysitting is allowed at age 11, and I know the recreation centre offers home-alone classes for kids 10 and up (or 7 and up if older sib is attending too).


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## amazed

I personally wouldny leave my kids that young....


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## having#4

We are talking about giving our 10 year old a key. She is a very mature 10 and it would only be for an hour until we get home. I wouldn't leave her to watch the babies though. She only does that for 5 10 minutes tops while I take the dog out or get the mail.


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## Nic1107

Freyasmum said:


> It's against the law here (NZ) to leave any child under 14 alone.
> Having said that, my sister was younger than that when we used to get home from school unsupervised...

God, I think I'd have jumped off a cliff at 13 if I wasn't allowed- by law!- to be home alone. That is absolutely ridiculous IMHO unless the kid is seriously incapable of taking care of itself for some reason.


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## CeliaM

Nic1107 said:


> Freyasmum said:
> 
> 
> It's against the law here (NZ) to leave any child under 14 alone.
> Having said that, my sister was younger than that when we used to get home from school unsupervised...
> 
> God, I think I'd have jumped off a cliff at 13 if I wasn't allowed- by law!- to be home alone. That is absolutely ridiculous IMHO unless the kid is seriously incapable of taking care of itself for some reason.Click to expand...

I totally agree. But of course there are kids who are completely irresponsible still at 13 quite often belong to parents who lack discretion on the matter.


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## lozzy21

There is no legal age to be able to babysit in the uk but the nspcc recomend that you dont let under 14's babysit.

My sister is 13 and she will watch my brother if my mam pops to the shop. She will only watch him on a night once he is in bed and my mam has gone to her friends round the corner or to mine and she can be home on less than 2 mins.


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## leeanne

I honestly think 11 is too young. Back in the day when I was that age, I was babysitting at 11 and 12, but times have definitely changed. I guess it depends on the area where one lives, the population and the crime statistics but here, I have a problem with a child being left home alone at that age due to the above factors.


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## Jo

I leave Emily on the odd occasion to nip to the shop 10-15 mins there and back, but I would never leave her to look after Jack, I trust Em completely, It is Jack I don't trust LOL.
I think it all depends on the mentality of the child but IMHO I don't think a 10/11/12/13 yr old should be in charge of younger siblings for more than 1/2 hour never mind over night.


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## Amy-Lea

What Lozzy said is what I just read up on it.

I however was allowed to walk home from School (about 10 minute walk) from last year of junior school (10) as long as My friend Ashley was in school that day too. Mum/Nan would always be in though I couldn't have a key until senior school.


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## MrsGaSp

I use to be left home alone when i was 7 but we lived in apartments then so we knew everyone so i knew who to go to if anything happened


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## MoonMuffin

My parents started leaving me alone at 11/12, though I was an only child and very independent, it was for short periods of time at first, and we lived in the middle of the woods next to a golf course in a very safe town. I wasn't allowed to babysit (as a job) until I was 13, but I was very responsible and started baby sitting for kids that were 7, so no super young kids at that age.


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## anothersquish

I wouldnt leave a child under twelve alone for any period of time. I would entrust them to go and post a letter or to the local shop etc by 9/10/11 depending on the child but being alone in a house would be a step too far for me. 
I would, once they got to twelve, start to be comfortable about leaving them for a few hours at a time, perhaps after school or whilst shopping was done or for a couple of hours in the evening whilst parents went to see a movie. I wouldnt be comfortable leaving them for longer than 3 hours and definately not overnight. Nor would I want to leave them incharge of younger siblings.


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## louise1302

my eldest is nearly 12, he walks home from schoool alone(about a 15 min walk) and do leave him at home if i nip to tesco( 5 mins away) hes not alone for more than 30 mins and knows not to mess with anything in the house or answer the dor to anyone
i wouldnt leave him in charge of any of the younger ones though, id come home to no house


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## Jkelmum

My oldest got a key at 10 incase somthimg went wrong and i wasnt home i would rather he be safe in the house ...have left him from 11 never for long and never with younger siblings


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## Unicus

I think thats too young. i think no younger than 13/14 definately and then it totally depends on the maturity of the child.


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## mrsraggle

I used to make my own way to secondary school and back at 11 and so family used to leave me at home alone if I wanted to while they went to Grandparents etc.


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## tasha41

Here I think it is legal for a child of 12 to be home alone, but to babysit I think they need to be older, though I'm not positive on that. I think it will depend on how mature Elyse turns out to be and the neighbourhood we live in, among other things.. but 12 on her own IMO will probably be about right, maybe 14 to babysit a child out of diapers and somewhat independent.

I think an 11 YO babysitting a 5YO for hours at a time in the evening is too much - I don't think that it is right for an 11 year old to have responsibilities like making sure another child has dinner, gets ready for bed, and goes to bed.


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## mamalove

I wouldn't leave my kids under 16 alone,not even for short periods of time.
and i certanly wouldn't let them babysit younger siblings.


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## Mervs Mum

My eldest would be alone in the house for around 20-30 mins when she got dropped off by the school bus after school. I finished at 4pm and was home for 4.15 and she got home just before 4pm. She did this from about 12/13. Other than that I didnt leave her alone for any length of time until recently - she's 15 in a couple of weeks. I only leave her alone if she asks to stay home while I go shopping or what ever. I think it can also depend on the child. Some kids you wouldnt want to leave alone for other reasons. My DD is very quiet and tends to want to stay home to do school work. Even up until she was 12/13 I wouldnt go out on an evening and leave her - she would go and stay at my mums.


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## sarah1989

I got my own house key at 14, and even then I was only ever home for about 30 minutes until my Mum came home from work. I started babysitting at 15.


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## helen1234

i think it depends on the maturity of the child and how long they are left, rosie has walked home from school let herself in till i got home from school 1/2 hrs later she felt too old for a childminder at that age. 

she's 15 in january and she's fine with the toaster and a tin of beans. 

siblings left at home is different i've seen many a scraps happen when i was a teen.


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## bailey98

I've left abbie alone while i pop down the shops a couple of times recently, she's just turned 10 and thinks she's all grown up! Saying that im only gone for 5-10 mins and i never leave the little ones with her, could not imagine giving her the responsibility of looking after them, i think looking after herself is enough at that age!


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## Elli21

Whats a latch key kid??? 

And answering the question, i wouldnt leave my kids until they are 12-13, but if they were responsible for their smaller sibling, not until they were 15-16.


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## KA92

my mum left me alone when i was around 11, same time as i got my own key...iv been told im very mature for my age and have been most of teen years. At 14 i was able to cook and iron no problem...my younger brother gets left alone at 12, hes now 13, i get left at night alone but i dont look after my younger brother over night. It has made us both super independant! 

I think it depends on how an indvidual feels and how mature a child is but in my opinion 13 or 14 sounds fine if you, as a parent, arnt comfertable with it before


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## kiki

I started leaving Kirsty for around 30 minutes when she was 13. Now she is 14, I would leave her for a couple of hours and sometimes she lets herself in after school if I am at my mums. 
I wouldnt entertain leaving her alone at night yet and definitely not in charge of Caidan.

I believe it is actually illegal to leave your child alone if they are under 14,although I would imagine that's more to try and prevent people leaving very young kids on their own:shrug:

xxx


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## KerryanneJ09

this is interesting :L 
ive seen some people on here say that they wouldnt leave a child under 12/13 alone etc. i totally agree that it depends on the maturity of the child, because anything could happen if they just didnt care.
ive obviously grown up learning how to look after children, because i have 8 siblings, i really had no choice :L 
ive had a door key since i was 9, for when i used to play outside because i knocked on the door every five minutes, and i had it on multicoloured string around my neck xD
i personally also think that is much too young, but i was a "responsible child" until i was around 13 :blush: and never really got in with a "bad crowd" or anything like that.
but now im 16 (and some of you may think thats just about old enough), i have a 9 month old and another on the way. i was fourteen with my first (which of course is wrong on so many levels) :dohh: this wasnt my fault in any way, but i wont go into that. 
i now live by myself with hayden + soon to have another. i know being a mother kinda changes things but not all 14 year olds are so irresponsible.
sorry for such a long stupid post that makes no sense. i dont understand it either if it helps 
lots + lots of love, Kerry, Hayden + Bump 
- xo


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## morri

Yea I think so too that it depends on the maturity of the child . But I think it is possible to leave a 11 yo child alone for maybe 1 or 2 hours.


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## nievesmama

My eldest is 13 next year, the only time i leave her home alone is if shes off school ill and i have to take my 5 yr old to school. I would never leave her in charge of my two little ones.
I know she is responsible enough, but i worry about things, if something went wrong and she was left there xx


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## tiggerlix

i will leave my 12 and 10 yr old while i pop to the shops,but never in charge of a 5 yr old,and never late at night.If i happen to pop out for the evening then my 16(alnmost 17 yr old)will watch his 2 younger brothers while im out and he charges me a tenner lol!


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## xxxjacxxx

I will leave my 13 year old (14 in jan) alone for a few hours...ive even gone off shopping and left him in the house for most of the day:shrug: I will allow him to watch my 11 year old for an hour at most, but rarely will I leave him in charge of my 6 year old and never with Leo and NEVER overnight.


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## xXhayleyXx

My 12 year old daughter has her own door key due to the fact that she finishes high school at 3 and i am usually out having to pick her brother and sister up from their school which dont finish til half 3. Both my eldest daughters who are 12 and 10 are very responsible when it comes to staying at home with eachother. If i have to go shopping then i give them the option to come with me and if the 10 year old doesnt want to then unless her 12 year older sister stays with her she gets dragged along lol. To be honest tho i find when i go out they get on better than when i am home... typical! lol
Very occasionally if i am only going to be 10 minutes at the local shop and its raining i will often leave my son who is 5 with them and they are all good as gold usually sat watching tv or playing the xbox. As for my 18mth old she will only get left with my 12 year old if she is asleep and im gone 5 minutes. 
My eldest 2 do so much for my 2 youngest even when i am home without me having to ask including nappies lol that i know they are very much capable of looking after them if an emergency was to arrise and i HAD to go out anyway.


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## aimee-lou

I was left on my own from the age of 8...... which was IMO too young - I would say 13/14 for a full night or senior school for 'latch-key' kind of scenario - but I was an only child, hated my babysitters and was very responsible. My mum and dad were musicians an would be out 6pm-2am every Friday and Saturday night on gigs. They would leave me with the TV and a box of tunnocks teacakes......happy as larry! lol At 10 I used to be at home all day while they went to work and would do the ironing, vacuuming and walk the dog too...... wouldn't dream of leaving Earl alone for 10 hours at 10 years old tbh!


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## MartaMi

7-years-old girl comes home from school 12am and is alone until 5pm or 6pm. I don't worry at all about leaving her home alone. Her brother is 4-years-old and also stays home alone or with sister when needed.
I really can't imagine that I should babysit a 7-year-old or worse a 10-year-old or older.


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## taperjeangirl

MartaMi said:


> 7-years-old girl comes home from school 12am and is alone until 5pm or 6pm. I don't worry at all about leaving her home alone. Her brother is 4-years-old and also stays home alone or with sister when needed.
> I really can't imagine that I should babysit a 7-year-old or worse a 10-year-old or older.

Are you kidding?!


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## MartaMi

taperjeangirl said:


> MartaMi said:
> 
> 
> 7-years-old girl comes home from school 12am and is alone until 5pm or 6pm. I don't worry at all about leaving her home alone. Her brother is 4-years-old and also stays home alone or with sister when needed.
> I really can't imagine that I should babysit a 7-year-old or worse a 10-year-old or older.
> 
> Are you kidding?!Click to expand...

No, why should I?
Emergency number is written next to the phone. 7yo knows how to take food from refrigerator, how to use microwave oven and so on. Comes home frm school on her own, eats, studies and plays. Ofcourse we don't let 4yo be on his own for that long but when neccesery, he's home alone also. Knows how to call to emergency and daddy. They both know what they can do and what they can't do. They also go outside alone. At the moment their also playing outside on city playground.


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## leeanne

:saywhat::shock:


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## Zarababy1

It really all depends on the child, My sister is 13 and my mum has no problem leaving her on her own, even when she was 12, also id have no problem with letting her baby sit charlie shes more than capable! but maybe 11 is a bit young!


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## anothersquish

MartaMi said:


> taperjeangirl said:
> 
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> MartaMi said:
> 
> 
> 7-years-old girl comes home from school 12am and is alone until 5pm or 6pm. I don't worry at all about leaving her home alone. Her brother is 4-years-old and also stays home alone or with sister when needed.
> I really can't imagine that I should babysit a 7-year-old or worse a 10-year-old or older.
> 
> Are you kidding?!Click to expand...
> 
> No, why should I?
> Emergency number is written next to the phone. 7yo knows how to take food from refrigerator, how to use microwave oven and so on. Comes home frm school on her own, eats, studies and plays. Ofcourse we don't let 4yo be on his own for that long but when neccesery, he's home alone also. Knows how to call to emergency and daddy. They both know what they can do and what they can't do. They also go outside alone. At the moment their also playing outside on city playground.Click to expand...

And this is why some people shouldnt have children. Leaving a 4yr old and a 7yr old alone and allowing them to play out completely unsupervised. 
I hope for your childrens sake nothing ever goes wrong, feel quite sick knowing some people can be so irresponsible and actually seem to be proud about it.


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## Jo

anothersquish said:


> MartaMi said:
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> taperjeangirl said:
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> MartaMi said:
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> 7-years-old girl comes home from school 12am and is alone until 5pm or 6pm. I don't worry at all about leaving her home alone. Her brother is 4-years-old and also stays home alone or with sister when needed.
> I really can't imagine that I should babysit a 7-year-old or worse a 10-year-old or older.
> 
> Are you kidding?!Click to expand...
> 
> No, why should I?
> Emergency number is written next to the phone. 7yo knows how to take food from refrigerator, how to use microwave oven and so on. Comes home frm school on her own, eats, studies and plays. Ofcourse we don't let 4yo be on his own for that long but when neccesery, he's home alone also. Knows how to call to emergency and daddy. They both know what they can do and what they can't do. They also go outside alone. At the moment their also playing outside on city playground.Click to expand...
> 
> And this is why some people shouldnt have children. Leaving a 4yr old and a 7yr old alone and allowing them to play out completely unsupervised.
> I hope for your childrens sake nothing ever goes wrong, feel quite sick knowing some people can be so irresponsible and actually seem to be proud about it.Click to expand...

 I'm sorry but I think saying something like that anothersquish is out of order.
I feel that 4 & 7 is young to be alone but we do not know anything about this lady or her family


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## MartaMi

Thank you anothersquish.
For you to know we don't have age limit how old kids can be left alone. That means kids in here are left alone more than you do. Despite your opinion that it makes us bad parents it makes kids more independent and leaving a 13yo home alone isn't a problem for anyone. At the moment it is school holiday but parents have to work. I'm a teacher so I can be home with kids but if I'd had to work during this holiday 4yo would be in kindergarten and 7yo would be home alone for whole week like a lot of kids have to be. 
I'm a teacher and I know how many 7-8yo children go home on their own - almost everybody. Their school day ends 12am and they have to be alone until their parents come home from work
Also we wouldn't let them be alone outside if it wasn't safe. They know how they have go over the roads. Use zebra crossing, holding hands and 7yo looking for cars. 
I really don't know about your kids anothersquish but these kids are taught how to take care of themselves.


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## mommyof3co

Wow I have kids of that age and I just can't imagine. And even though my oldest is VERY responsible and is capable of taking care of himself and his brothers to an extent I would never leave him alone. I'm glad it's illegal here so it's not common. Even if kids are responsible accidents happen, people can break in, people can watch and see that young kids are home alone everyday between certain hours and it makes them more vulnerable. Yeah, don't agree with that at all, my opinion of course, and I don't care how responsible the child is. And it isn't "babysitting" when it's your children, it's your job as a parent. Working or not...that's what real babysitters are for, or daycares. Anyways just my opinion....I personally won't be leaving my kids alone by themselves until around 12-13 just depending on their maturity at that time. I'm pretty sure under 12 is illegal here


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## taperjeangirl

MartaMi said:


> taperjeangirl said:
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> MartaMi said:
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> 7-years-old girl comes home from school 12am and is alone until 5pm or 6pm. I don't worry at all about leaving her home alone. Her brother is 4-years-old and also stays home alone or with sister when needed.
> I really can't imagine that I should babysit a 7-year-old or worse a 10-year-old or older.
> 
> Are you kidding?!Click to expand...
> 
> No, why should I?
> Emergency number is written next to the phone. 7yo knows how to take food from refrigerator, how to use microwave oven and so on. Comes home frm school on her own, eats, studies and plays. Ofcourse we don't let 4yo be on his own for that long but when neccesery, he's home alone also. Knows how to call to emergency and daddy. They both know what they can do and what they can't do. They also go outside alone. At the moment their also playing outside on city playground.Click to expand...

It is illegal to leave such young kids alone here, and I am glad it is.

What if one of your kids were to choke? Would the other one know what to do?
And in regard to your comment about "babysitting" your own children, why have them if you feel that you will be babysitting them?!

It is your parental responsibility to care for your children and keep them from danger.
I know we live in completely different places but it just seems so wrong that children so young be left to fend for themselves, and even if everyone else was doing it I wouldnt be.


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## pinkmummy

taperjeangirl said:
 

> MartaMi said:
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> taperjeangirl said:
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> MartaMi said:
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> 7-years-old girl comes home from school 12am and is alone until 5pm or 6pm. I don't worry at all about leaving her home alone. Her brother is 4-years-old and also stays home alone or with sister when needed.
> I really can't imagine that I should babysit a 7-year-old or worse a 10-year-old or older.
> 
> Are you kidding?!Click to expand...
> 
> No, why should I?
> Emergency number is written next to the phone. 7yo knows how to take food from refrigerator, how to use microwave oven and so on. Comes home frm school on her own, eats, studies and plays. Ofcourse we don't let 4yo be on his own for that long but when neccesery, he's home alone also. Knows how to call to emergency and daddy. They both know what they can do and what they can't do. They also go outside alone. At the moment their also playing outside on city playground.Click to expand...
> 
> It is illegal to leave such young kids alone here, and I am glad it is.
> 
> What if one of your kids were to choke? Would the other one know what to do?
> And in regard to your comment about "babysitting" your own children, why have them if you feel that you will be babysitting them?!
> 
> It is your parental responsibility to care for your children and keep them from danger.
> I know we live in completely different places but it just seems so wrong that children so young be left to fend for themselves, and even if everyone else was doing it I wouldnt be.Click to expand...

I totally agree. There are just too many bad people in this world nowadays :nope:


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## coccyx

Think it is awful to leave children alone so young. They may know how to use aphone but could they cope if they were scared, fire, strangers in house, fitting child etc. Yes it is aparents job to teach their children responsibility, but a lot to expect at that age. If you do not want to babysit your YOUNG children then maybe you should have thought twice about being a parent!!!!


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## MartaMi

First of all, they aren't my kids. They are my OH kids and their parents have raised them like that. Babysitter or daycare. 7yo starts school in here, she doesn't have a daycare to go to and babysitter. Why on earth should I pay nanny for sitting in my home and watching tv? I know that there isn't anything else for her to do because Janely does everything by herself. She is big enough for that.
When leaving them alone together or 4yo alone at home I don't mean whole day. Longest time 4yo has been home without parents is 2 hours.
I know you think of that as a real problem but that is called cultural differences. Just imagine, 10yo kid is left alone for night in here and 12yo kid has been home alone fo 3 days. What you think is irresponsible we think is normal, what you think is normal we think is ridicculus. Imagine 8-9yo kids hanging around with friends on a big city for whole day. I hesitated about writing my opinion here but doesn't matter anymore.


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## morri

Can't really say much to having been alone from certain age on, because my grandpa lived with us , but from school age on we went to our friends or activities(gym, friends, library) within the village limits alone, so don;t see anything bad about that part.


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## mommyof3co

Just out of curiousity, where do you live that it's so common to leave kids that young alone?


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## taperjeangirl

i think it is Estonia she is from


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## MartaMi

Estonia yes.


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## Jkelmum

taperjeangirl said:


> MartaMi said:
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> taperjeangirl said:
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> MartaMi said:
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> 7-years-old girl comes home from school 12am and is alone until 5pm or 6pm. I don't worry at all about leaving her home alone. Her brother is 4-years-old and also stays home alone or with sister when needed.
> I really can't imagine that I should babysit a 7-year-old or worse a 10-year-old or older.
> 
> Are you kidding?!Click to expand...
> 
> No, why should I?
> Emergency number is written next to the phone. 7yo knows how to take food from refrigerator, how to use microwave oven and so on. Comes home frm school on her own, eats, studies and plays. Ofcourse we don't let 4yo be on his own for that long but when neccesery, he's home alone also. Knows how to call to emergency and daddy. They both know what they can do and what they can't do. They also go outside alone. At the moment their also playing outside on city playground.Click to expand...
> 
> It is illegal to leave such young kids alone here, and I am glad it is.
> 
> What if one of your kids were to choke? Would the other one know what to do?
> And in regard to your comment about "babysitting" your own children, why have them if you feel that you will be babysitting them?!
> 
> It is your parental responsibility to care for your children and keep them from danger.
> I know we live in completely different places but it just seems so wrong that children so young be left to fend for themselves, and even if everyone else was doing it I wouldnt be.Click to expand...

I have recently done my cp and in england there are no laws in regards to leaving a child home alone as long as they are not at risk ...yet its illegal for a under 14 to babysit a child unless a sibling and yet again no law as long as there is no risk ...I was shocked to learn that but sayying that after the aged 8 you dont have to leave them with registered childcarers either which also i dont agree with ...

to OP I have left my eldest alone from 10 onwards ...to go shop ( 20 mins ) from 12 i left him to go into town (few hrs) and from 14 i leave him to babysit when i go shopping for my 2 yr old but wouldnt ever leave the baby with him


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## taperjeangirl

that is frightening eh?! The reason I thought it was illegal was when I was 14 my friedn of the same age... parents left her on her own in the house over night and ended up in court because of it, they werent charged but social services were involved and she ended up in a home for a few nights :wacko:

So someone could legally leave their baby in the house on its own so long as it wasnt at direct risk?


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## Jkelmum

taperjeangirl said:


> that is frightening eh?! The reason I thought it was illegal was when I was 14 my friedn of the same age... parents left her on her own in the house over night and ended up in court because of it, they werent charged but social services were involved and she ended up in a home for a few nights :wacko:
> 
> So someone could legally leave their baby in the house on its own so long as it wasnt at direct risk?

Thats right but its a mine field depenant on the childs age ect they can try prove the child is was at risk ...we did lots of senarios and was asked which was worst i stated the 8 yr old who often was left home alone with 4 yr old and was completley off the mark :shock: it was a family who argue all time because of what that family is learning the kids will stay with the child forever and is a form of abuse while the 8yr and 4 yrold may never come to any harm ..its crazy there should be a law x


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## Blah11

:shock: @ leaving a 7 year old alone for 6 hours.



Anyway, I won't leave Amelie until atleast 11 or 12 and depending on how mature she is mybe later. I let myself in from school when I was at highschool so I was 11 and by the time I was 13 or 14 I was coming home from school and making my dinner as my mum was a single parent and worked long days. It wasn't everyday though, get 3 days a week max.


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## krissie1234uk

I had a key and came home from school alone from age 10. I walked home with 2 other kids and I only had one proper road to cross. I was fine, I was alone for about 2 hours Mon-Fri. From this age I was allowed to go to the shop alone, and my parent's would leave me when they went shopping. I don't have younger siblings though, so can't comment on that. 
I think 13/14 is a good age to babysit younger siblings, but I wouldn't trust a baby with anyone under 16.


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## Trying4ababy

Just my opinion. To me a child should not be left alone for very long until they are old enough to understand what to do in emergencies.

I thought leaving a 7 year old by themselves was bad but a 4 year old???? Just my opinion but if you are leaving a 4 year old alone for 2 hours then you have no business being a parent.


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## WannaB

I just know what I used to get up to as a kid and purley on those grounds I wouldnt leave my kids at home alone, even the most well behave child gets up to mischeif after all they are children!:haha: I didnt leave my eldest at home alone till last year when she turned 15 and then with that comes a whole lot of other things to worry about, like no teenager has ever invited people over while they shouldnt?! But there does come a time when you have to give them space and start to let go a bit. I also have an 11 yo that I dont leave at home alone, shes very clever and well behaved but she doesnt have the maturity an adult has when it comes to a crisis, even I wonder how I would handle some horrible situations, let alone a child with no experience in life. I also dont trust that they wont get into a spat when Im not there to referee them and sometimes pushing and shoving can end in sadness, so would rather not run that risk either. I couldnt bare the thought if something happened that could have been avoided.


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## GoldenGSD

I was 11 when my parents started to pop to the shops without me. I remember being so excited about being home alone! I was 17 when they went away for the week and left me and one of my friends home alone.

I think it depends on the child. I am an only child and I was very mature for my age plus we had some great neighbours that would to 'keep an eye' on me. I knew that in an emergency I could run next door. I was a rather boring teenager and wouldn't have even thought about having a party or anything wild!


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## sobersadie

I am utterly gobsmacked that anyone could leave a 7 year old and especially a 4 year old home alone!!!! My sons are 4 and 8 and there is no way on this earth they would be left by themselves in the house - ever! I also have a 3 month old daughter and dont let the boys even hold her unless im in the room so there would be no way id let them babysit her. Has the woman who leaves her 4 year old home alone never heard of Madeline McCann? They thought it was 'safe' to leave their kids sleeping alone whilst checking every 1/2 hour and look what happened? As another poster said I would never forgive myself if something happened and i wasnt there to help. I would say 12 at least before id leave them home and only by themself not babysitting their siblings younger than them.


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## taperjeangirl

well she claimed it was ok to do it because "she lives in a different country/culture" and everyone does it.

I backed away from this thread for fear of it getting out of hand but I keep thinking about how awful it is!

My oldest is 13 and I still dont leave her in the house alone! She is quite mature, but her head can be full of nonsense some days and I am scared to what I will come home to!


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## MartaMi

sobersadie - ofcourse I have heard of Madelaine McCann but I am suspicious about it. I also would never leave my kids alone in a strange place, not to talk about foreign country which language they can't speak or call us for help in that age.
So, school started last week. That means 7yo has been home alone in this and previous week, 5 hours a day after coming home from school. Warms up her lunch, studies, plays etc. She has been okey and is really proud that she can manage on her own.
I just mean that if you say 13yo isn't mature enough to be home alone then when can your kids grow up and study how to be mature, how to be responsible? I'm a P.E teacher and I know which kids can cope with being alone, which can't. I know who I have to constantly remind to take a shower after a lesson, who has their chlothes with them, who I have to tell something all over again. 16yo girl in my class is living alone because her home is 30 km from school and she doesn't want to drive between home and school. She goes home for weekends, Mon-Fry is alone in he apartment and does everything by herself. By the way, she copes with it perfectly and has good grades in school.
I can't remember when exactly my parents started to travel on their own leaving us home alone but they definetely did when I was 14. So week or two home alone with sister during summer, grandparents living about 1 km away. They cooked for us and brought it, we could go there/call if we wanted something. We cooked on our own and look - we are still alive. When I was 15 and on a trip with my dad, one women who had her 15yo daughter with her praised me for being independant and coping on my own. Foreign country, foreign language and I had no problem being on my own when dad had things to do. I was moving around in Paris and in Berlin on my own, no problems.
That is what I want my kids to be like and it is impossible if I don't let them out of my sight, to practice being responsible in their safe surrounding, in their home.


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## Minstermind

Is this a normal thing in your culture there? As in, are there a lot of parents doing the same as you, leaving their children age 7 and even younger alone for extended periods of time? It's a very strange concept to me. I have a 7 year old and he is very mature and I'm sure would be *able* to get by fine on his own, but my personal comfort level is that even though he might be -able- for it most the time, I don't think that means he -should- be. It's like that saying goes, ''just because you can, doesn't mean you should''. But this is what I am accustomed to thinking based on my own cultural understandings and experience.


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## MartaMi

In here kids go to school 7yo and their day ends 12am. If possible kids go to their grandparents or some schools have daycares where kids can stay for couple of hours and do their homeworks. If that isn't possible they are home alone until parents come home. During school holidays kids are also home alone if they don't have grandparents to go to. I haven't heard that somebody would have hired nanny for that time. 
But hey, I live in a smaller place than you. In my town we have 6000 people so really no panic needed. In our capital city we have 406703 people living and people in there let their kids be home alone or come home from school on their own. 9-10yo kids hang around in the mall and on the city on their own.


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## morri

I think this is in anyway quite common in Eastern Europe. I think I can also recall that the old east germany was quite similar to this as well(not personally obv xD, but from hearing.) It is just a different mentality and especially in countries that have a low count in population.(as in 1 million is the whole population of one country)


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## Minstermind

I did wonder about that as I recall hearing that it was more customary in eastern European countries to do so, or even leave their strollers outside the shop/store while they go in shopping. Just different mentality, I suppose. I wouldn't do it myself but I think before people jump to conclusions about what is right and wrong here, that there should be some willingness to ask questions and try to understand the cultural norm somoene is living in. If most other people in Estonia are doing this, for example, and this is what you are raised with believing is acceptable and ok to do, then it really boils down to cultural differences. Like I said, I wouldn't do it myself and would be much more likely to think badly of a mother who did this in a place where it's not considered acceptable, but I really couldn't pass judgment on someone where it's the cultural norm there.


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## Trying4ababy

My town only has 260 people and I still wouldn't leave a 4 year old home alone. I guess though the USA is quite different from other countries. If you leave a young child like that home alone here and someone finds out about it you get Child Services called on you.


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## Minstermind

To be honest, having come from the states, I'd be a lot more fearful of letting a child out alone or leaving a child alone at all, regardless the size of the town, due to all the horror stories there. Obviously those horror stories happen EVERYWHERE, so I'm not saying they don't. But either they do seem to happen more frequently there (maybe it's a population issue?) or it's just reported a lot more often in the news. Could be lots of reasons, but the fear issue is definitely present in the states a lot more than it is here in Ireland.


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## Lara+sam+bump

Think I was about 8 when I was left alone while my Nan walked the dog for an hour. Im on only child xx


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## VampMum1980

i have left my 7 yr old son alone for 20 mins at the most to pick my eldest up from school if hes poorly or busy playing his xbox ( when i get eldest from after scool club) , but wouldnt leave my 10 yr old and 7 yr old alone for more than an hr coz id worry!

plus my 10 yr old is scared of being left alone, i left her for 10 mins last wk to get my 3 yr old from play group when she was home sick n she moaned!


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## Lillipop

Well I must say I'm pretty shocked...
I personally would not leave my two eldest children that are 6 and 8 on there own until they were at least 11! Even then it wouldn't be for long, just a nip to the shop down the road or something! 
I was roughly the same age when I was left whilst my parents went grocery shopping, even then I remember them ringing to check-up on us (my sis who is 2 years older)! 
I wouldn't leave them on their own at there age now (1) because Its way too young (2) I don't trust them (3) I would fear something happened to them and (4) I would be paranoid I would have SS on my back! (which lets face it they most probably would here)
I wouldn't let them babysit their younger brother until they were at least 15/16 either. (Theres a 7 yr age gap between my youngest and eldest)
I would never forgive myself if something happened to them and as a parent its my responsibility to look after them at the end of the day!
Just my opinion.
x


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## Midnight_Fairy

I would never leave mine alone untill secondry school age :O


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## happyfeet

Depends off the child but 6 is very young. I wait until at least 10 years old


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## carrieanne

my oldest are 12 and 14 and i never leave them alone apart from the fact war would break out i dont think they are old enough xx


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## number7onway

hi my 12 year old girl (very mature) occasionally looks after my 2 year old while i nip down the school to pick up the others if she is off school poorly! im only gone half an hour and she has the phone and my number right next to her! i trust her fully with any of the kids but would not allow her to look after baby cos lo is too young! i would never allow her to be left on her own for longer than a couple of hours! she walks to the local shop and to the park, she always has her phone with her so can be checked on/can call me or other adult! i would NEVER leave my other children at home alone and they range from 10yo-10 weeks! also would NOT leave ANY of them overnight or even for a couple of hours in the evening! :nope: everyone has different ideas on it but thats my personal choice! :hugs:


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## pinkmummy

I can't believe this thread is still going :rofl: x


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## midori1999

I think sometimes people forget that the maturity of a child depends an awful lot on how they are raised and that can differ between different countries. 

I can't imagine leaving a four year old alone, or even an eight year old for long periods. I do occasionaly leave my 9 year old whilst I pop to the shop, which is 200m away, but we live on an army camp, so our situation is slightly different. However, in some countries, especially third world countries or developing countries, children are far more mature for their age and children as young as four would commonly be working in full time jobs, maybe operating indutrial machinery. I wonder how many Brits or Americans can imagine their four year olds being capable of that? (Not that I am saying it it right, but it does happen). 

My oldest is almost 14. I will happily leave him alone or babysitting his two younger brothers, who are nine and six, either during the day or evenings, but not overnight. There is always a next door neighbour, plus nearby neigbours/friends he can contact if he needs to in an emergency but he has never had to. He is more than capable of looking after them and can do most meals and cooks the evening meal often anyway, which he enjoys and is capable of doing spag bol, cakes etc all by himself. He is a confident child and would know how to react in an emergency or situation like a powercut etc. 

On the other hand, my step daughter is almost 18 and I wouldn't allow her to babysit as I don't feel she is mature or knowledgable enough at all.


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