# please give me hope and advice>>>



## kayshablake

Hi there sorry new to this thread unfortunatly..
ive been going for grwoth scans every 2 weeks due to baby being small..however i went there yesterday alone as i thought it was jsut another scan only to be told baby is very small im 25 weeks and few days..so they wanting to take baby out as they say its gona have beta chance outside of me than in as the placenta isnt working properly and the blood flow from umbilical cord isnt doing its job properly...
How can they do this surely my baby needs to be inside,,
i have to go back next tuesday for another scan to check blood flow then they will discuss the timing of taking steriods but they said delivery will be more than likely before im 29 weeks...im soo upset and cant help but think my baby is going to die,,
the consultant said please be aware that this baby may not survive but we will do out best so dont wurry...i mean how can i not wurry i hope somone else is going through the same thing or has been through it so that i can have some advice i have 2 other healthy happy 37 weeks carried children who were quite small but otherwise healthy :((


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## kayshablake

also it weighs 467 kg and they are working towards getting baby upto 500 before they deliver which i think is about 1lb1 oz?


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## AP

Hi kayshablake.

I'm sorry you are going through this. There are actually loads of us in this section now - so you aren't alone!

Sometimes it really can be 'best' to get the baby out before term. The docs will be able to do more than the placenta.

I was born at 29 weeks. And I had my baby this time last year, and she was 27 weeks and 4 days gestation. We just celebrated her first birthday. 

The odds these days are higher, so please, dont panic just yet. And you have the chance of a full dose of steroids, which works in your favour too - i only managed 1. There are mums of 24 and 25 weekers on this section too, and im sure they will drop by later to give you some advice.

www.princessalexsdiary.blogspot.com


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## kayshablake

Thanks very much for replying i just dont know what to do at the moment and i carnt belive i have to wait until next tuesday to see if my baby is still alive..
i mean the heart etc was very strong and its a wriggler so i dont understtand how one day it could just die inside of me i cant settle until i feel a little movement..


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## AP

Do u havea doppler hun, to put your mind at ease a wee bit?


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## kayshablake

no i dont have anything like that...ill try and get something sorted for over the weekend x


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## AP

It might help you hun, and if you really feel theres an issue you can go seek help asap, you know what I mean? That's what I would do, I guess

Stick with us here hun, we're here every step of the way! :hugs:


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## 25weeker

Hi

I am sorry to hear you are going through this terrible time. I unfortunately know the feeling of being told your baby may not make it. At 21 weeks I was told I was dilated with membranes bulging and there was nothing they could do as I was going to go into labour. Feeling yourbaby kick wondering is it the last time is awful. Thankfully I didn't labour and after 5 days got an emergency stitch.

At 25+2 I got an infection and went into labour and was yet again told with the extreme prematurity and the infection there was a slim chance. Although my story isn't a complete happy ending as one of my little girls didn't survive however the other one is 6 months actual next week and 11 weeks corrected and she is doing really well. Still small at 8lb but putting steady weight on at her own wee pace. She weighed 659g when born but in Nicu there was another baby weighed 550g born at 26 weeks and she done brilliantly and was off oxygen weeks before my lo so size isn't everything.

Nicu is a rollercoaster journey but there are plenty people on here that can answer any questions.

Fingers crossed your little one keeps fighting in mummy's tummy

Xx


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## katy1310

Hi

I'm so sorry to read about what you're going through, and I just wanted to let you know that I went through something really similar. At 25 weeks I was told that I'd be lucky to get to 30 weeks and at 26+4 I was told I would be lucky to make it another 10 days. In the end I made it only another 3 days but fortunately my story had a happy ending and Sophie is now home, nearly 16 weeks old with a corrected age of nearly 3 weeks, after spending 12 weeks in neonatal. She was 845g (1lb 13) when she was born.

I had to go through all the daily scans to check the blood flow and growth etc and I know how terrifying it is. I went through hell in the couple of weeks between finding out there was a problem and Sophie being born. But DH and I both think that those two weeks were much worse than the 12 weeks she was in neonatal. It was the worry of not knowing whether she would be born alive, how tiny she'd be and what problems she might have. 

In some cases, the baby is better out than in, and there is really so much they can do for babies now. In the incubator they try to mimic the conditions of the womb as much as possible. With me, they monitored every day to find out the best possible moment to deliver before it became a danger either to me or to the baby. They did leave her in as long as they possibly could, and they kept telling me that every day makes a difference, and one doctor even said another half day inside makes a difference. If you are able to get the steroid injections they do really help. 

I would agree with SB22 that a doppler is a good way to put your mind at rest. You can get them from amazon quite cheaply. 

I really hope everything is ok, I'm here if you need to talk, having gone through this very recently myself. Just to reassure you, there was a 24 weeker in the neonatal unit at the same time as Sophie and she has now gone home, also if Divadexie sees this thread I'm sure she will reply as her little girl was only 1lb 3 and born I think just over 25 weeks but is doing really well. 

I think there have also been a couple of 23 weekers in the unit we were in, who survived.

xxxxx


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## kayshablake

thanks so much for replying i appreciate the time youve taken immensly...
i dont know why theyre leaving me till tuesday why cant they check me out now..im getn pains in my stomach but im not sure if thats because of all the stress..... they say my baby isnt measuring the right size some parts are a few weeks behind so wont that make it alot worse for when its born as its not actually how many weeks they think it is..urgh its all just so hard to understand and im sooo frustrated :(


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## elsielouise

I know how worried you are as I went through the same thing although I was a few weeks further on than you. I just wanted to say that my consultant said they take the absolute minimum risk when making decisions about our LO and if they say your lo is better out, then they do know what they are doing and at least you are being monitored.

I also wanted to say that if they are using ultrasound to estimate growth (don't know if there is another way) then that can be unreliable. My LO ended up being taken out by C section (yours will probably be too as it's less stressful for tinies) when they estimated his weight at 3lb something.

He was nearly a pound heavier than that and is now 18 months and perfectly healthy.

I remember sitting up the night before the section paranoid about kicks and feelingmore frightened than I have ever been, before or since. But things worked out OK.

You are in my thoughts.


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## kayshablake

thanks very much

these may seem like stupid ? but do i buy the baby some prem clothes for in hpital or does hpital use there own..also should i buy a breast pump to get me milk once baby has been delivered and then keep using pump and take milk back to hpital and what about nappies do i buy them or hpital uset hem,,,sorry i know so many ? but i have everything swimming around in my head at the moment and need to write it down to get it out xx


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## 25weeker

kayshablake said:


> thanks very much
> 
> these may seem like stupid ? but do i buy the baby some prem clothes for in hpital or does hpital use there own..also should i buy a breast pump to get me milk once baby has been delivered and then keep using pump and take milk back to hpital and what about nappies do i buy them or hpital uset hem,,,sorry i know so many ? but i have everything swimming around in my head at the moment and need to write it down to get it out xx

I wouldn't buy clothes just yet as it will be a while before any clothes will be put on your lo. Once they decide to dress your lo then you can use the hospitals or buy your own and you will know what size to buy. You will need a pump to express when you are at home. You should also get parts to use the hospital grade pump when in the unit. The unit will have bottles and labels for any milk you express. The unit should also provide nappies.

If it is inevitable you are going to have a preemie then you can request to visit the unit beforehand to prepare you as they are very intense environments. If possible request to have a chat with a neonatal consultant and they can give you an idea of what to expect. I seen a neonatal consultant at 23, 24 & 25 weeks and I found it helpful.


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## kayshablake

thanks very much for that its helped me somewhat??
will i just ask all this when i go in on tuesday to see my consultant... i really dnt think am ready for this or strong enough for this i have a 7 yr old and 2 yr old its all going to be soo hard :(


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## Evolution<3

_Im very sorry to hear what you are going through...My little guy was born at 30 weeks ..(went into the hospital at 26 weeks with complete placenta previa and was put on strict bed rest until he was born) so i sorta understand what you are going through. My roommate in the hospital had her LO at 23 weeks though.. he was measuring pretty small AND she was also told that he would be better out than in, And he is doing just fine  The best you can do for yourself and your LO is to stay positive..I know, sometimes that is easier said than done but I'VE realized that worrying doesn't make anything better. I wish you the best !_


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## 25weeker

:hugs: This must be so difficult especially having 2 other children to look after.

Speak to the doctor who does your scan and he can get it arranged for someone in neonatal to speak to you and take you around the unit if you feel up to it.

Any questions everyone on here will try and answer them.

Take care xx


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## kayshablake

thanks everyone soo much ireally appreciate the time your taking out of your lives to reply to me and answer my ? i will just have to wait till tuesday for answers and ill update u all of course thanks so much xx


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## katy1310

We had a tour round the neonatal unit when we knew Sophie was coming early and we spoke to a paediatric doctor who told us the kind of things we could perhaps expect during our time in neonatal.

Sophie was just wearing a nappy until she reached 4lb. She was in an incubator until then, and the nappy she had was so small the hospital told us they have to order those ones in from America. Once she went into a heated cot the hospital started dressing her in their tiny clothes, but we were also allowed to take our own clothes in. A few people had bought us tiny baby clothes for up to 5lb etc - but even if you do want to buy those I wouldn't buy too many, because Sophie was not in them too long. We mostly used the hospital ones and just had 3 or 4 of our own and she has already outgrown them and is almost into newborn stuff now.

The nappies were provided by the hospital the whole time till she came home.

It really helped us to talk to the paediatrician - the first hospital we were in, they wouldn't tell us anything because they didn't want to commit themselves to saying anything....but then when I was transferred to the bigger hospital, they were brilliant and told us the kind of things we might expect, in a very general way. We weren't wanting any specific info, just to find out what it might be like in neonatal, and that's exactly what they told us in that hospital but refused to tell us in the smaller one! 

xxx


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## katy1310

Oh and I meant to say, you are probably a lot stronger than you realise. When I was at the point you are at just now, I seriously thought I couldn't do it. I couldn't face the thought of everything we were going to have to go through, all those weeks stretching ahead in neonatal etc - but when it happens, you get an inner strength of some sort...something just kind of takes over and you do deal with it. You have lots of ups and downs and times when you feel like you are cracking up, but then you get strong again and you also feel that you have to be strong for your baby. Looking back now, I don't know how we did it, but we did and we have come out the other end. And you will too. 


xxx


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## rubyboo08

kayshablake said:


> Hi there sorry new to this thread unfortunatly..
> ive been going for grwoth scans every 2 weeks due to baby being small..however i went there yesterday alone as i thought it was jsut another scan only to be told baby is very small im 25 weeks and few days..so they wanting to take baby out as they say its gona have beta chance outside of me than in as the placenta isnt working properly and the blood flow from umbilical cord isnt doing its job properly...
> How can they do this surely my baby needs to be inside,,
> i have to go back next tuesday for another scan to check blood flow then they will discuss the timing of taking steriods but they said delivery will be more than likely before im 29 weeks...im soo upset and cant help but think my baby is going to die,,
> the consultant said please be aware that this baby may not survive but we will do out best so dont wurry...i mean how can i not wurry i hope somone else is going through the same thing or has been through it so that i can have some advice i have 2 other healthy happy 37 weeks carried children who were quite small but otherwise healthy :((

try not to worry, my sister was born at 28 weeks and very tiny she was 2lb1 and she is coming up to her 12th birthday in sep, docs can work miricals these days, my thoughts ar with you, hope all gos well


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## kayshablake

thanks so much again for teh replys now that im getn a bit info i feel somewhat better but not totally...this pregnancy has jsut been through so much this year first my grandfather died when i was around 3 months then last month my mother died {sort of mam} and they cudent find a cause for her death so im jsut wondering if its all too much stress and then its surely my fault :?(


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## AP

No - it's *not* your fault honey - don't worry yourself in that respect. These little ones are here to test us.

I agree with what Katy says - its an instinct thing i think - you just get on with it and then you look back and think - how did I do it?????? But you just do. Because mummies are superwomen, espcially premie mummies!


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## Alias

I didn't go through this, but a friend of mine did. She was due with twins, and was told from about 20 weeks on that one of the girls wasn't growing, she wouldn't survive, neither would survive, even that they should remove her to give the other twin a chance (but at the risk of losing both). In the end she went into labour at 27 weeks, and the twins both survived, they were 1lb and 2lbs. I think it was a relief for her at that stage, as the waiting and wondering was driving her crazy. If your body isn't providing what is needed for the baby, then what they're planning might be the best hope for them. 

My friend (her girls were born mid-april) has the bigger twin home now, while the smaller one is still in hospital, but doing well. For all three of them it was probably for the best.


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## MUMOF5

:hugs:. Hope all goes well for you and your baby hun. xx


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## littleblonde

I shouldnt really be in here. However my cousins baby was born at 24 weeks. She went to hospital with a water infection and had her baby in hours. It was a very hard time for them all however her baby is now over 6 months old and is doing great.


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## Marleysgirl

Hi there

At 21 weeks, I found out that I had a problem with the bloodflow into the placenta, and was put on regular u/sound & doppler scans to monitor this. I was also told that my baby was measuring small, and IUGR was explained to me. 

I had a scan at 25 weeks, then at 27 weeks. I was warned to watch for less movement from my baby, which could indicate that the placenta was beginning to fail.

I had a scan at 28 weeks, and this showed that the bloodflow had failed. I received two steroid injections, and was advised that birth was imminent. I was scanned every two days from then on, the steroids did improve things for a short while.

At 29+1wk, the scan showed that baby had to be delivered in order to preserve his life (better out than in). Six hours later (I had eaten lunch!), I had a c/section and wee Andrew was born weighing just 638g. He went straight into an adjacent theatre for ventilation, and was then taken to the Neonatal ICU whilst I went to recovery.

Andrew's tale is posted in a long thread in here. He is a healthy, thriving little boy. He has had a couple of health issues from being born so premature, but when I consider that we could have lost him, I can put up with any number of such problems.


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## kayshablake

thanks for the detailed reply..i just wish tuesday was here so that i can get more answers its like waiting for a bomb to go off or something :( been a very long and miserable weekend my way xx


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## kayshablake

d-day tomorow will come back and let you all know outcome thanks alot for all the messages :)


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## AP

Good luck honey! xxxx :hugs:


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## AP

Hey hny- hope all was well today. I saw this and thought of you

https://www.inspire.com/groups/preemie/discussion/less-than-500-grams/


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## kayshablake

hi all heres my update i got my uterine artery doppler scan again today blood flow hasnt worsnt or got better so ive been given a shot of steroids and going back in 24hrs for another one then baby will be born within the next 1-3 weeks thats if it doesnt die inside me :( but theres my update thanks again for the messaages x


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## broodylocket

hi, i had a problem and they thought i needed to deliver at 29 weeks, so i kinda know how u feel but in the end i went full term, a miracle apparently but was induced.

all i can say, if they thinks its best for ur baby to be outside then yeah its gonna be tough but good luck and i hope it doesnt come to that xx :hugs:


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## MUMOF5

:hugs:. The steroids will really help to get babys lungs to mature. Keep us informed. Best wishes to you and bub. :hugs:


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## vermeil

oh oh kayshablake you are going through exactly the same thing that I did. At 25 weeks I was hospitalized because the baby was very small and the blood flow in the placenta was low and dropping. They told me I wouldn't go another 3 weeks before they took the baby out. Like you I had regular scans - every day towards the end. I lasted another 10 days or so. At 27 weeks they decided his odds were now better outside the womb so I had a c section. 

But to encourage you he was still going strong, kicking and moving all the time. I know this sounds impossible right now, but keep confident and strong. The blood flow won't suddenly stop - the decrease is quite gradual. They'll take him out before there's a *chance* he might grow weaker. They won't wail until the birth is too much strain. At that point he really is better outside.

So baby vincent was born at 27 weeks weighing a whole 570 grams. That's the weight of a 23 weeker. He was in the bottom 2 percentile for growth - 98 percent of babies are bigger at that stage - which classifies as a severe growth delay. They gave us the odds of a 24 weeker, which weren't encouraging - I can send them to you in pm if you wish. Essentially we had 50% odds of bringing home a healthy baby, or with mild or medium health problems. Keep in mind hospitals tend to give pessimistic odds. But really he was a 27 weeker despite the small size. Those extra weeks make a huge difference. Even as a foetus our bodies are amazing. The blood flow he does receive will go towards his brain and lungs, which are the most important obviously - the brain to command the lungs to work and the lungs to breathe. They're getting ready to live outside the womb. The rest can be smaller. 

He'll be fine *huuugs*. Nowadays they save over 90% of babies born at just 25 weeks. Every day you can go beyond that will just make his journey easier. His lungs and intestines are what will need to mature as longest as possible. They are what will need a bit of help in the first days. He won't receive milk for a week or two - that's perfectly normal. They'll give his intestines time to develop and prepare to digest milk before they give him any. He'll be fed by IV, a super mix of calories, vitamines, fat and everything else he needs. He'll be on ventilators for quite some time - probably until your due date. There are multiple ones that all operate differently, and help in different ways. Ask the doctors, don't be shy with questions. We can help you with all the terms. I can talk neonatal lingo with the best of the nurses now ;)

My baby is in a room with 3 babies all born at 24 weeks. Two months later, even though he's much smaller than them due to the growth delay, he's actually growing and healing better than them, because his organs had those extra weeks to mature. He needs far less oxygen, digests more milk and is generally more stable. He's now at 35 weeks and now at the 8th percentile of weight - he's catching up! A whole 1800 grams now. His weight has tripled in 8 weeks!!

I hope these words encourage you - these little guys are so strong. They amaze me every day. We're in a children's hospital, the neonatal ward is specialized in these small guys. I know the other parents, I hear the stories, see the other babies every day. They're all doing well. 

Every day will bring ups and down - I know how very hard it is, but try to keep positive. Ask to visit the neonatal ward. They'll provide diapers, he'll be in a heated incubator so he won't need clothes. You should be able to rent a very good milk pump from them. They'll take care of all such details. Leave it in their hands. Just focus on yourself, get plenty of rest. *huuuugs*

edit - sorry my reply is chaotic, trying to give too much info at once ;) If you have specific questions I'll happily reply. I'm off to see bubbah as I do every day - I'll check back tonight.


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## kayshablake

thanks very much for detailed reply im jsut absolutely sick with worry i cant sleep..eating lots tho to try and make baby fatter ha hope its working or ill have a lot of weight to loose......i jsut dont know what to do they say my baby can die inside me at any day o every min of the day im wondering has it died yet things werent supposed to be like this :(


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## Lisa-2323

Huney i hope things work out for you, its a terrible stress for you when you should be relaxing. I had my lil girl at 27+4 she weighed in at 1lb 9oz. She came home 4 days before her due date weighing in at 4lb11oz. They really do work wonders now days. Most babies born after 27 weeks have a 95% survival rate. I met some lovely ladies on the neonatal unit. Some babies were born at 23 weeks for the same reasons as you and they are doing really well now. Ill keep my fingers crossed for you and remember if u dont feel baby move every few hours go A & E straight away. dont feel like your wasting their time. Good Luck huney my thoughts are with you. xxx


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## kayshablake

thanks again for replys well its been a mad few days.....monday i had a scan and they said blood flow started to reverse so was kept in and looked after for 24 hours till next scan checking babys heart beat every few hours and my blood pressure etc everything was fine and then went for a scan and the consultant said oh well the blood flows went back to absent now ..dont know how that happened but it did...so ive came home yesterday and gotta go back again today to see what the blood flow is like,

its like living in a nightmare that you just cant wake up from im constantly wondering if my babys died and are they going to get it out in time its just awfull

and my consultant said in his words well you may come tomorow to find the baby has fell of its perch???????? his words not mine ...its all just purely awfull it really is :(


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## 25weeker

OMG your consultant needs a slap for being so insensitive!

Hope everything goes well with your next checkup.

Thinking of you x


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## AP

Hey hunny
Katy told me what your consultant said. Both me and my gran were horrified, how awful - agree, id have slapped him!

If u want to ad me on FB its www.facebook.com/sexyback86 x


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## kayshablake

hi all went to today scan and the blood flow has reversed again but he cheked another vessel inside the babys tummy and he said thats still good so were going for yet another horrific 24 hours of waiting to see what happens this is just hell pure helll


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## AP

Every day matters hun. Fingers crossed!!!!


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## Luzelle

Goodness, what a terrible time you are having! Wishing you well, and hoping that your little one keeps on fighting for his life. Keep us updated when and if you have the time. I really hope you have some good support at home, having to deal with your two other children as well now.
xxxxxx


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## tashaclaire

Hi, I have only just read your post. The same thing happened to me yesterday. I have been going for growth scans every two weeks. Yesterday I was told that my baby was measuring 5 weeks behind. I am nearly 35 weeks. I have to go back on tuesday for rescan of flow through cord. The consultant told me baby will be safer out than in at this stage. I know you are earlier on than me but it sounds like we may be going through the same thing at the same time. I know how you are feeling xox


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## kayshablake

hi all today i went for scan and then the consultant sent me to a bigger hospital newcastle rvi for more tests and a second opinion with another consultant...
they sed blood flow is absentagain so one day its reveresed next day its absent....baby is measuring some parts 21 weeks otehrs 23 im 28 weeks tomorow ......
so i have to go back to the rvi at 9 in morn for another scan to check blood flow this is soooo hard but what can we do apart from take it 24 hours at a time :( thanks for mesages again xx


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## vagirl2010

kayshablake said:


> Hi there sorry new to this thread unfortunatly..
> ive been going for grwoth scans every 2 weeks due to baby being small..however i went there yesterday alone as i thought it was jsut another scan only to be told baby is very small im 25 weeks and few days..so they wanting to take baby out as they say its gona have beta chance outside of me than in as the placenta isnt working properly and the blood flow from umbilical cord isnt doing its job properly...
> How can they do this surely my baby needs to be inside,,
> i have to go back next tuesday for another scan to check blood flow then they will discuss the timing of taking steriods but they said delivery will be more than likely before im 29 weeks...im soo upset and cant help but think my baby is going to die,,
> the consultant said please be aware that this baby may not survive but we will do out best so dont wurry...i mean how can i not wurry i hope somone else is going through the same thing or has been through it so that i can have some advice i have 2 other healthy happy 37 weeks carried children who were quite small but otherwise healthy :((

At 28 weeks, your baby's lungs have not fully matured, but with the proper interventions, there is no reason why there should not be a good outcome for your baby.

Infants that are small for gestational age are not always accurate, so try not to worry too much until the baby gets here. I have seen several SGA infants born and most of the time, they are just small and there didn't appear to be a reason for the account in size.

Typically what happens at 28 weeks is that the infant is intubated and given a drug called Curosurf through the breathing tube. It's a steriod that has an almost instant effect on getting the baby's lungs jump started, though ventilation support maybe needed for a few hours to a few days.

28 weeks, is a good place to be...you have skipped over a ton of major neurological complications that would otherwise, be of greater risk.


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## vermeil

Hello again - if you remember from my earlier reply, I basically lived the same scenario two months ago. Looking back now, and comparing with other little miracles (I know I know we shouldn`t compare heh), even though he had a tiny weight, 590grams (1lb4oz, a 23 weeker) his brain had the maturity of a 27 weeker. That`s what helped a lot. He was in a room with babies born at 24 and 25 weeks which were MUCH larger than him - and they were all on larger respirators and receiving more oxygen.

The blood flow your little guy does get will be going to his brain and heart - essentially what he needs right now to keep going. The rest can be smaller. That extra brain maturity will help a lot in terms of stable breathing and heart rate. The next steps will be helping his lungs mature and his intestines eventually mature and start working.

*huuuuugs* you are in my thoughts every day. There are no words to describe how scary this was for me too. during the many scans they weren`t even able to estimate his weight, it was below their scale. Yet at nine weeks he`s still going strong, and almost breating on his own now. You can see pics of his weekly progress here: 
https://www.babyandbump.com/prematu...ip-very-important-preemie-25.html#post5821261


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## kayshablake

thanks again been to hospital again this mornin for a scan blood flow is worsened but not enough for them to take her out of me right now so going back again tomorow morning for another scan....they also gave me her odds of survival at 50/50 but thats only if she makes it outside my tummy as they say she could die anytime...each day feels like groundhog day :(


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## Natalia2010

Sorry to hear you are going through this. My 7 year old was born at 28 weeks as well and did great, had a few hurdles but for the most part was smooth sailing and time to grow in the NICU.

I think it is horrible and unfair they are telling you to anticipate losing your LO< if they think its that serious they should get him out.

Here is lots of :hugs:


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## AP

kayshablake have they said any more about your LO's weight? 
The gestation is getting better - thats in you favour - youve beat me anyway, I was 27+4!


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## Luzelle

Thinking of you. 
Hugs. xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## kayshablake

the weight is 1lb 2 oz approx but as ppl have said they cant be too sure of weight until shes born :( n thats even if she makes it out of me....i hate this waiting all the time its like living in hell but trying to get through day to day for my dd and ds xx


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## kayshablake

been to hpital again today blood flow remains the same and the same thing is happenin again i have to go back again tomorow for another scan to check blood flow....he said i may go onto 32 weeks but certainly not over but thats only if the blood flow remains at this stage but thats unlikely to happen with the severity of the blood flow now :s so still stuck in limbo and dont know whats happening next thanks again for all comments and ill keep you all updated as and when possible x


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## LoveNTy

I hope baby cooks some more for you!!! I can't imagine what you're going through..with all the worry.
Good luck!!


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## Agiboma

hoping for the best for you and your lo


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## kayshablake

all ok again for next 24 hours xx


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## vermeil

did they tell you to have complete bedrest, and to lie as much as possible on your left side? That will optimize the blood flow. Can someone look after your other children? And yes you`ve already beaten me by over a week so hang in there! *huugs*


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## kayshablake

no they said thats the worst possible thing to do have bed rest???? no idea why?? 
my husband has my kids and sister as and when were jsut about coping for now but thats cos i wont stay in hospital my family needs me xx


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## Agiboma

great to hear hun, just hang in their and think positive thoughts


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## Lisa-2323

Im soo please you and baby are holding out, us mums will all keep our fingers and toes crossed for you. I think the reason bed rest is not the best option is cause if your not active your blood flow slows down to suit your activity so i guessing that they want you to have a good steady pace for you and baby as this will keep your artaries open allowing the blood flow more freely to baby( but no over doing it either). My sister had and emergancy c section last night cause babys cord was not functioning well she is 29 weeks gestation weighing 2lb 11oz a good size considering but they did say cause baby had the lung booster this was the contributing factor that she is doing so well. I hope this gives you a little more hope huney. Keeps us updated and please feel free to ask anything you want. You need lots of support and this site really helps you get through it, there are some really lovely ladies on here. sending hugs to you and baby. xxx


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## kayshablake

well im 29 weeks now and my bby weighs 1lb 3 oz its a bit difference..
been t hpital today and bby deteriorating so maybe tomorow she will be born were taking in 24 hours at a time xx


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## Agiboma

Hang in their I know it's hard I deliver my little guy @ 25 weeks I hope it gets better for you soon


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## nineena

Thinking of you hun and really hope bubs hangs on in there as long as possible xxxx


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## AP

I get the feeling this lil one will surprise us with the weight! Fingers crossed still xxxx


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## kayshablake

i hope so xx ty


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## Lisa-2323

Fingers crossed for you and baby chic. I really do hope u can last a bit longer, but i have every faith that u and baby will be safe. Thinking about you and baby. xx


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## camishantel

I didn't want to read and run.. honey all I can say is I am sorry and I am praying for you and your baby... :hugs:


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## Luzelle

Thinking of you. Good luck. Do you have a name for her yet?


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## kayshablake

we choose summer but it just dont seem special or precious enough so we thinkn of more open to ideas thanks ppl these msgs brightn up my day x


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## vermeil

*tons of positive thoughts*


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## kayshablake

ty all again still not much change going to hpital every day to check blood flow one day its bad other days its good so still taking it day at a time but she will be here within next 3 weeks according to consultant as he doesnt want to risk her being in there after im 32 weeks keep me in your thoughts xx


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## kayshablake

all still the same here im now 30 weeks 6 days :) blood flow keeps changing from bad to ok but other than that no changes just daily hpital scans and ctg traces on baby carnt wait for this all to be over


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## camishantel

yeah for making it to 30 weeks.. hope all still goes ok and that she is born happy and healthy hun... still keeping you in my prayers


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## kayshablake

thanks need all the prayers i can get at the moment x


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## AP

30 WEEKS!!! :happydance:


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## kayshablake

bby still small tho predicted at 1lb 5-6 oz not much for that gestation is it?? should be around 3-4 lb now and thats where the problem lies :(


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## boardnbikema

dear kaysha...feelin for you babe...but if it helps I am mama to wee fella born 30 +6 very suddenly with no warnings...he was severely underweight for his length and gestation..born at 2lb 6oz. but 2 months in NICU with tender loving care from all the team and we go home. wee guy is packing 8lb 6 now at 15weeks since birth and full of spirit. s/he just needs you and if you can stand the endless boredom and hassle express milk for him/her then do it... its horrendously knackering but makes a HUGE difference to the long term health of a prem, preventing all sorts of illness pre due date. I've been through it so my heart goes out to you...be strong lass and when little one appears try and just take one hour or day at a time. hopefully you will have friends and family around to help you through that bit...that said my greatest allies were other parents in the unit, no-one else understands really. x


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## New2Bumps

So pleased for you that you got to 30 weeks - brilliant news. Hope things continue to go well for you x


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## AP

Kaysha I really would rely on the growth scans, they can be soooo out!


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## Dragonfly

Well heres hope. My other half was born at 29 weeks 29 years ago and they didnt have the things they have now that save a babies life more. He weighed 1lbs and was even given last rights at birth and was very small, he slept in a shoe box, My mum was also premature and she is in her 50s and was in a shoe box to.


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## AP

You're right dragonfly, theres more they can do now. My OH's uncle was a 28 weeker, and he lived in a shoe box beside the fire and no-one was allowed to go near him. He made it!


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## kayshablake

its all good all you kind ppl saying all these lovely things but when im at the hpital everday and the consultants are saying please prepare for her not to live either inside or out as we cannot explain why the blood flow is going reveresed then absent then postive when its just supposed to be postive then go absent then go reveresed then deliver its all so confusing....they said thats why it makes them think theres something seriously wrong with the baby so you see its not just a prem baby at 31 weeks at the moment its a prem baby with severe iugr..if you google iugr itl give you loads of horror stories and not much positives its all so heartbreaking its killing me inside...so yeah its great im now 31 weeks but baby is still 7 weeks behind abdominally and 4 weeks behind in head growth....if anything a normal prem baby seems so much more better than what im going to have to deal with and these are not my words there my consultants :( i try to remain postive but seriously its sooooo hard :( :(


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## SugarKisses

I am so sorry to see what you are going through :hugs: I hope with everything I have that bubs will be ok. 

I see your from around my area too :hugs:


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## Dragonfly

kayshablake said:


> its all good all you kind ppl saying all these lovely things but when im at the hpital everday and the consultants are saying please prepare for her not to live either inside or out as we cannot explain why the blood flow is going reveresed then absent then postive when its just supposed to be postive then go absent then go reveresed then deliver its all so confusing....they said thats why it makes them think theres something seriously wrong with the baby so you see its not just a prem baby at 31 weeks at the moment its a prem baby with severe iugr..if you google iugr itl give you loads of horror stories and not much positives its all so heartbreaking its killing me inside...so yeah its great im now 31 weeks but baby is still 7 weeks behind abdominally and 4 weeks behind in head growth....if anything a normal prem baby seems so much more better than what im going to have to deal with and these are not my words there my consultants :( i try to remain postive but seriously its sooooo hard :( :(

They do prepare you for the worst, my other half wasnt suppose to live either he was baptised at birth due to that and well he did and he really wasnt a well baby. I hold out hope for you and really hope it does work out as I cant imagine the worry thats going through your head right now :cry:


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## AP

They certainly do prepare you for the worst, if only to cover their bums too. At 8 weeks i was told the pregnancy with alex was unlikely to last. It did. Then I was told Alex wouldnt have much of a life after her IVH bleed, but here we are!


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## kayshablake

and is alex ok sorry to ask just want to here postiives not negatives x


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## clairec81

Hi, already posted a brief account of our story but after keeping up with your recent posts i thought i would add a bit. After bleeds at 7, 8 and 11 weeks we were told that our baby wouldn't make it, they said probably the onset of a miscarriage and nothing they could do. We got to 19 weeks with no more bleeding, believing that we had just had a bad start only to be scanned and told that i had virtually no fluid (knew something was wrong as i had a very small bump) and at that point told baby WOULD NOT SURVIVE and actually told by 1 doc that they would give me a termination later that week! We visited a consultant who confirmed low fluid and very little hope but arranged for scan by specialist. We were given some hope at specialist visit and told baby's lungs could develop with so little fluid but his fear was early rupture of membrains. Sure enough 4 weeks later at 24 weeks my water broke and once again we were given 'the facts' i am convinced the tell you the absolute worst case to cover themselves. I managed to last until 33 weeks (which they said would never happen) only to be told at the last scan that the baby's lungs were measuring small and the chances of survival were less than 5%. We were told to prepare for hours, possibly minutes with our baby and they even began to make arrangements for how they would get me to the baby quickly as we knew it would be a c-section. I was given NO hope and told that our baby would die. Anyway she arrived on Christmas Eve and after an emergency c-section i woke to be told by my OH that we had a daughter who was on a ventilator in the NICU - i'm sure this would be devastating news to many but it was the best news i've ever heard! Anyway she made it despite being told she wouldn't. My OH says i should not post this to you as it may be filling you with false hope, however i no that at my lowest point hope was all i had. You must stay strong as long as that baby is there, i truly believe that i owed it to my baby to keep going as no one else was giving her a chance. Please let me know if i can help with anything and take care.


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## AP

kayshablake said:


> and is alex ok sorry to ask just want to here postiives not negatives x

OMG yes, its unbelievable tbh!
She is right now destroying the living room ;)

What I'm trying to say is the docs have to tell you all the possibilities, but since having Alex and meeting other preemie mums I've realised there is no definate answer, people are told the worst outcomes and get overjoyed when its not the case ;)


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## kayshablake

thanks for them storys girlsss...
well been t hpital toady for another scan and they were gona deliver today however they were happy with ctg although its not the best its still ok..
so i rekon tomorow is a day of decisions to be made and have been told it will be in the next few days :s


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## Fiestagal

Mine is a positive IUGR story - We got to 34+6 and weighed 2lb 11 1/2 oz, he needed no assistance with breathing and just needed to grow. I was told the although he was much smaller then he should have been for his gestation the older age of his gestation was a plus as everything is a little more developed. Despite being so small he breastfeed at 3 days. He was the smallest baby in the unit but in terms of independent breathing and feeding he was ahead of the bigger babies.

Wishing you good luck xx


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## AP

Fiestagirl thats a brilliant story - I told my OH this morning and he was stunned at Connors lil weight, but only because Alex is was beefer when she was born!


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## premmiemum123

So sorry to read your story. 
They do prepare you for the worst and they can't make any promises as every baby is different. Sounds like you are being carefully monitored and they are telling you everything you need to know...I have everything crossed for you...x


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## keldac

I was unsure whether to reply to this thread or not. I understand EXACTLY what you are going through. I have been through this and it's horrendous. I am so sorry to hear you are going through this and I hope you have a positive outcome.
My daughter was deleivered at 29weeks and 3 days and weighed 1lb 2oz :hugs:


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## AP

I will leave Kayshablake to post everything but baby has arrived - and she sounds positive. :)


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## Marleysgirl

That's great news Sb22, and we'll wait to hear from Kaysha when she's ready.


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## Agiboma

thanks sb22 waiting for the update


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## kayshablake

yey shes here 1lb 10 oz 31 weeks 2 days i will come back with full update but for now shes doing amazingly well oxygen for first 12 hours then nothing for last 3 days :) feedn on my breast milk and pepti junior i think its called xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx add me on fb if u cant wait to c pics as its not working for me my name is kayshablake xxxxxx just msg me to say where u from xxx


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## AP

ooh i havent seen pics yet babe, have you uploaded them?


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## Fiestagal

Congratulations!!!! Wishing you a smooth scbu experience x


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## Agiboma

congrats hun so glad to hear she is doing well


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## 25weeker

Congratulations she sounds like she is doing really well.

What a wee fighter

Xx


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## clairec81

Been anxiously waiting to hear - congratulations, she is definitely a wee fighter, looking forward to more details soon x


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## kayshablake

https://i131.photobucket.com/albums/p286/it-solutions/summer/6.jpg





here she is xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## clairec81

Congratulations, she really is a wee miracle, hope she's doing well and you too!


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## ~Krissy~

Congratulations and I am so happy to hear things are going well right now! 

Welcome to the world, Beautiful girl! :)


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## Anna_due Dec

Wow what a hard journey you've already been through. She's beautiful and such a little toughie :) Goodluck with your next journey (the hospital). You've already been through so much. Keep your chin up, it won't be long and she'll be trashing your house and keeping you up all night xoxoxoxoxox


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## AP

Wow wow wow thats a great pic


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## SugarKisses

aw she is gorgeous, congrats xxx


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## OmarsMum

Congrats hun, great news


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## keldac

she's beautiful. Congratulations again! x


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## kayshablake

i no u all probs get sick of me asking but do you mind telling me what gestation u had ure kids and how long they had to stay in hospital im sure u can understand i jsut want her home with me and carnt imagine me doing this for 2 months im going crazy now arghhhhh just want her home and shes having no problems no CPAP etc shes doing everything herself i held her at 3 days old and now get cuddles everyday and shes putting lots of weight on each day and her feeds are being upped both formula and breast all they keep saying to me is shes really small :( i want her home


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## camishantel

howmuch weight has she put on.... it's different in every country as to how big they need to be before they can go home


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## Marleysgirl

Kaysha, Andrew was born 11 weeks early and spent 11 weeks & 1 day in NICU. But that was mainly because he was ventilated, then cPap, then on oxygen and only came off oxygen after 10 days. I had to stay in overnight to prove that we had a robust method of feeding - in fact, I stayed twice, once b/feeding which was unsuccessful, and then bottle-feeding EBM. The key target in our NICU was a weight of 2kg before discharge.


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## keldac

I know how hard it is being in scbu - I've done it twice now!
Mikayla was born at 33 weeks and spent 29 days in scbu and came home weighing 4lb 3oz! x


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## kayshablake

shes nearly 1lb 12 now and was born 1lb 10 8 days ago she seems to be steadily putting on weight but the hpital said today that they wont go off her weight it will be how well shes feedn etc i jsut want some sort of time scale as my due date of exactly two months away seems so hard and long away and plus i have my other babys at 37 weeks so hopefully they will take that into consideration :( jsut want her home xx


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## Agiboma

i had my Lo @ 25 weeks and we are still in the hospital this is week 5 and yes i am still going crazy everyday


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## Anna_due Dec

Rather than tell you how long my boys were in hospital, i'll tell you how long before their due date they got out because i think that's what you really want to know :) My son was 13 weeks early and got out 2 weeks before his due date. My second son was 8.5 weeks early and he got out 3.5 weeks before his due date. The only reason they were in so long is they wouldn't suck which meant i couldn't feed them. Had they mastered the feeding earlier they both would have come home quicker. It will pass in a blink, just hang in there.


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## kayshablake

i hope so shes doing really well again at the moment a few days ago she contracted an infection and it was awfull she had to go back on the nose canula for 24 hours and that was jsut as she was destating all the time but shes ok now thank god..
shes still tolerating her feeds and are going up everyday as she gains weight..
her current weight is 1lb 14 1/2 oz the half is v improtant lol..... shes lost a few grams here and there over the days but gradually put it all back on ...shes beautfull :) shes on 5.40ml of feeds every hour:) :) shes doing well thanks again for all your replys xxxxxx


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## katy1310

kayshablake said:


> i no u all probs get sick of me asking but do you mind telling me what gestation u had ure kids and how long they had to stay in hospital im sure u can understand i jsut want her home with me and carnt imagine me doing this for 2 months im going crazy now arghhhhh just want her home and shes having no problems no CPAP etc shes doing everything herself i held her at 3 days old and now get cuddles everyday and shes putting lots of weight on each day and her feeds are being upped both formula and breast all they keep saying to me is shes really small :( i want her home


Sophie was in hospital for 12 weeks and 1 day - she came home 6 days before her due date. She was 7 weeks in intensive care, 3 in high dependency and 2 in special care. She was on CPAP for most of that time though so Summer is doing a lot better in that respect. She was put into a heated cot when she reached 4lb and they kept an eye on her to make sure she was holding her temperature. She went into a normal cot 2 weeks before she came home. They didn't go by weight in our hospital - it was by whether they were off CPAP, holding their temperature and feeding. Sophie didn't try feeding until she was 9 weeks old, which would have been 36 weeks gestation. She was still desatting a lot until she reached 38 weeks then suddenly stopped. By the sound of things, Summer just needs to put on weight and get the feeding mastered - at least she isn't on CPAP etc which was one of the biggest hurdles Sophie had to overcome. Sophie was putting on an average of 1oz per day after the first week or two. xxxxx


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## kayshablake

thanks again for msgs summer is now 2lb 2 oz :) theyve put her on low birth weight milk so hopefully thatll make a huge difference and shes also showing signs of wanting a bottle shes sucking like mad on her feeding tube and trying her hardest to turn he head when she feels something brush against her cheek ..
i mentioned this to the nurse and she said they make consider start bolus feedings to prepare her for the bottle and as far as i know up to now the nurse did 1 at 9 am this mornin and thats all i know as when i phoned the nurse who is looking after her was buzy and normally i go in at 12 but due to babysitters and no cash we just going in tonight at 6 its the first time ive missed a 12 visit but it needed to be done so kept buzy cleaning house from top to bottom carnt wait to see her tonight :)
has anyone got any advice about the bolus feeds and how they work and for how long it would be until they tried her on a bottle thanks again xx


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## kayshablake

woohoo went into 6 o clock visit to find my beautifull lil girl in a heated cot with clothes on and a dinky pink hat hahaha im over the moon 3 weeks 1 day into heated cot seems like weve stumbled hundreds of miles to get to this point so going to enjoy every moment lol woohoooo


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## AP

Its amazing huh? Heated cots ae mind blowing, you have so much more access!


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## Anna_due Dec

Yay, awesome progress!!! :)


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## keldac

kayshablake said:


> woohoo went into 6 o clock visit to find my beautifull lil girl in a heated cot with clothes on and a dinky pink hat hahaha im over the moon 3 weeks 1 day into heated cot seems like weve stumbled hundreds of miles to get to this point so going to enjoy every moment lol woohoooo

that's fab news! I remember being ecstatic when Mikayla was in a warmimg cot!!! :happydance:


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## kayshablake

woohoo another amazing update summer keepn her temp etc very well and is now on bolus feeds from 4pm today every hour until midnight then getting fed every 2 hours then every 3 then moving onto a bottlee whoooooooo happy days and also weighs 2lb 5 oz on todays weighin xxx


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## kayshablake

:( bolus feeds stopd she keeps desaturating and needn oxygen mask t keep her stable so they putn her on antibiotics and also considering blood transfusion :s will find out more in an hour x


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## keldac

kayshablake said:


> :( bolus feeds stopd she keeps desaturating and needn oxygen mask t keep her stable so they putn her on antibiotics and also considering blood transfusion :s will find out more in an hour x

I know how hard it is in scbu. You're elated one minute and distraught the next. Keep us updated. :hugs:


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## camishantel

kayshablake said:


> :( bolus feeds stopd she keeps desaturating and needn oxygen mask t keep her stable so they putn her on antibiotics and also considering blood transfusion :s will find out more in an hour x

all my thoughts and prayers are with you and summer and your family


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## kayshablake

doctor was happy not to do blood transfusion and wait and see how she is on next ward round at 8pm tonight,.
theyve given her antibitoics whilst they wait for blood tests to come back in 48 hours as a precation and shes on eye drops for an eye infection shes had for 3WEEKS n its only just came back now that shes got one as each time they were given her a test one was saying she did have it then the next one was saying she diddnt :( not very happy at the moment but as long as summer is ok for now thats the main thing xxx


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## Agiboma

its really hard but hang in their im going on week # 8 in trhe NICU so i know how you are feeling


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## kayshablake

summer keeps desaturating quite alot so is now back on oxygen :(


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## MUMOF5

:hugs:. Hope she makes some improvement very soon. Come on Summer.xxxxx


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## keldac

How is she this evening? xxx


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## AP

Kaysha its all very normal hun, one step forward, two steps back sometimes. Alex had eye infections and blood transfusions too :( hated it, but she didnt give a stuff :)


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## kayshablake

Summer had blood transfusion last night but it hasnt improved her oxygen levels shes keep desaturating all the time so i have no idea whats wrong with her i will be going to hospital soon to see what the next step is for her ..
https://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/SummerGallimore i made this page for her to help raise awareness and hopefully raise a bit if cash for this charity its keeping me buzy and my mind occupied please take a look and tell me what u all think xx


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## dainti2001

kayshablake said:


> Hi there sorry new to this thread unfortunatly..
> ive been going for grwoth scans every 2 weeks due to baby being small..however i went there yesterday alone as i thought it was jsut another scan only to be told baby is very small im 25 weeks and few days..so they wanting to take baby out as they say its gona have beta chance outside of me than in as the placenta isnt working properly and the blood flow from umbilical cord isnt doing its job properly...
> How can they do this surely my baby needs to be inside,,
> i have to go back next tuesday for another scan to check blood flow then they will discuss the timing of taking steriods but they said delivery will be more than likely before im 29 weeks...im soo upset and cant help but think my baby is going to die,,
> the consultant said please be aware that this baby may not survive but we will do out best so dont wurry...i mean how can i not wurry i hope somone else is going through the same thing or has been through it so that i can have some advice i have 2 other healthy happy 37 weeks carried children who were quite small but otherwise healthy :((

I went through practically the same as you, reading your story was like a mirror of my situation. The only difference was that my waters broke, on the day of my 24 week scan and i was kept in hospital, given steroids etc. I had her one week later and that was 7 weeks ago. I think if she stayed in she would've probaby died because she was the weight of a 22-23 weeker and not getting the proper nutrients. The docs said they were gonna try and get her to 28 weeks then they were going to induce me, she didnt wait that long to come out but she is doing okay with ups and downs but truly a blessing. If they think inducing you is the best option, then do it because in most cases they know what they are doing and they will not knowingly do anything to jeopardise you or the baby's health. Good luck.:hugs:


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## keldac

Has anybody had an update? Thinking of you and baby Summer x


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## katy1310

keldac said:


> Has anybody had an update? Thinking of you and baby Summer x

Summer has been home for a couple of weeks now and is doing well - I'm sure her mummy won't mind me updating you! Think she is over 5lb now :)


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## keldac

katy1310 said:


> keldac said:
> 
> 
> Has anybody had an update? Thinking of you and baby Summer x
> 
> Summer has been home for a couple of weeks now and is doing well - I'm sure her mummy won't mind me updating you! Think she is over 5lb now :)Click to expand...



thank you! I did find her today on fb and have been looking at all her beautiful piccies x


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## kayshablake

helloooooooooooo everyone im so sorry i never came back i associated this with the bad time in my life and wanted to concentrate on the good and alot of you who i spoke to on here added me on facebook so i have connections that way...sorry to have stayed away i now realise we are all here to help eachother not just through the bad but the good tooo....


update on summer

she now weighs 16lb 2 oz still on full time o2 has been weaned off during the day twice now but bronc and collapsed lung made her go back on it,,, shes 10 month old rolling over sitting up rocking back and forth on her knees ready to crawl saying mama and dada and generally being a boisterous little girl..if anyone hasnt added me on facebook please do so yo can see how far she has came :)))))


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## Agiboma

great to hear the fab news about summer thanks for the update, btw what is you fb username


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## kayshablake

kayshablake 

xxx


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## mumof2kids

Hey this is great news. I haven't been on here for a long time. Lots been going on and it's been tough but slowly getting time to myself. So glad to hear your lil one has progressed so much. My Aaryan is coming to one years old but obviously he is only 8 months. He sits and babbles along still on o2 like your lil one but he has had so many chest infections and colds which have stopped him coming off he is on the minimum of u2 so anytime soon he will be off. Otherwise developmentally there have been no concerns which I'm so grateful for. I've added you on fb will be nice to see her progress take care x


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