# My 23+4 loss



## Allthatglitte

Hi,
Could I tell you my story.

My husband and I tried to get pregnant for 3 years. We had tests etc and found that neither of us had any problems so it was unexplained infertility. We had two tries of IUI and got pregnant on the second try. 

We were so happy. I had a normal healthy pregnancy with no issues. Our 12 and 20 week scan showed a healthy baby. 

On Monday 12th August I had been up with stomach pain since 2am. When I went to the loo at 6am I noticed some bleeding, so rang the hospital who told me to come in. I was examined and the doctors were happy as there was no fresh bleeding and my cervix was closed and far back. I was taken up to the ward for observation. 

During the day the stomach pain got worse and worse. By 2pm I was begging for pain relief. Doctors and midwives had been to see me and examine me and didn't know what was wrong. My stomach pain was low down and constant. At 3pm I was examined again and no fresh bleeding, cervix was closed and far back, baby's heartbeat was fine so everyone was reassured. At 4pm I needed the toilet so my husband took me. Whilst on the toilet I had an overwhelming urge to push so I did. A midwife came in and dragged me off the toilet and put me on the bed. They rushed me down to delivery suite where they examined me again and said I was dilated. My water then burst (all over two midwives) and 2 minutes later little baby Eli was born at 4.35pm. 

The neonatal team were on hand and managed to get his heart rate up and a tube down him for his breathing. They said they hadn't known until they saw him if they could do anything due to me only being 23+4 weeks but he was a good weight for his age, fully developed and had really good skin. They took him down to neonatal where they stabilised him. 

Eli did really well for the first couple of days and the doctors were pleased with him. Unfortunately he started to struggle on the third day and had a bleed on his lungs. On day four the doctors said it wouldn't be fair to carry on with his care. So we had to say goodbye to our little boy. We both had cuddles with him and his died whilst lying on my chest having a cuddle. He was four days old, just a bit too early and a bit too little (1lb 6oz)

It felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. The pain as you all know is unbearable and the sadness overwhelming. 4 weeks on and I feel incredibly sad and like a piece of me is missing. I know that never goes and you learn to live with it and move forward. I feel like I'm grieving two things, my baby Eli and my pregnancy (due date not until 5th Dec) 

x


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## Chellxx

I am so so sorry for your loss, i have no words but am sending you and your family healing prayers xxxx


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## louise1302

So so sorry for your loss my little girl was stillborn 5 months ago at 24+3 and although the pain doesn't go away it does get easier to live with. Sending a hug x


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## NerdyMama

:hugs: am so sorry..


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## Mrs Doddy

So so sorry x


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## monkee12

So sorry for your loss x


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## honeybunch2k7

Im sorry about little Eli. :cry:


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## LauraLoo1612

I'm so sorry for your loss :(


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## Mellybelle

I am so sorry for the loss of your little boy Eli. xx Its a beautiful name. <3 :hugs:


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## Quackquack99

I'm so sorry Hun xx


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## jenniferannex

I am so so sorry for your loss :hugs::hugs::hugs: xxxxxxxxz


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## TJMYANGEL

I'm so sorry for your loss x


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## dizzy65

i am so sorry for your loss :hugs:


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## AwesomeSauce

I am so sorry. I wish there were a way to take us out of this awful pain filled place. My heart hurts with yours. You are not alone.


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## iluvmyfamily

I am so so sorry for your loss. I don't have the right words. :(


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## OurLilFlu

So so sorry for your loss, cherish those days you did have and lean on your family and friends to help you grieve. None of my words are not enough to help the incredible pain you have in your heart :hugs:


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## Tara158505

:hugs: so so sorry:cry: this broke my heart all over again


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## mandi21a

I am sincerely sorry to hear your story, if you need anyone to talk to please feel free to message me. Time will heal, even though it feels sofar away


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## MonyMony

What a terrible loss...I'm so sorry. :cry: I hope you've been taking care of yourself. :hugs:


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