# family contributions to wedding



## princessellie

ive seen a few people say their parents and inlaws are paying quite a bit towards the wedding, did they offer or did you ask? i dont want to ask as i find it cheeky like but so far no one has offered to help us, all theyve said is oh you dont need a proper venue with sit down meal, you just need a pub reception, oh you dont need to get married in hotel, just go to the registry office :dohh:


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## Twiglet

Liam's parents offered and I asked my mum what she wanted to pay as she'd made it clear she wanted to contribute :thumbup:


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## booflebump

Our parents offered, and we are paying the rest ourselves xxx


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## superbecks

My mum can't really afford but is helping with the planning etc. Oh's parents always said they would contribute so when we booked the venue we had a chat about how much and they gave us a figure, we are putting the rest towards but they have payed the majority x


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## honeybee2

Erm,my MIL just asked how much the reception was- I told her and she said she'd pay for it. My mum made shotgun that she paid for the bridesmaids so that was her thing. My Dad I just gave a list- I didnt ask him or let him have his opinion- if he said he wasnt paying for anything then he wouldnt have got an invite...sorry that sounds wrong but my Dad is really tight and its about time he put his hand in his pocket.


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## marley2580

I asked my mum and my dad to match what we're putting in.


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## princessellie

well ive just got off the phoen to my mam, i asked her when my grandads birthday was, saying it would be lovely to get married on that day, she said august 24th :shock: so i said oh no theres no way we could afford to get married in 7months!!! she said she is gna ask my dad and she will let me know later whether they can pay for half the wedding as she would love for me to get married on his bday!!! so we might be bringing it forward!!

x


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## honeybee2

ooo that sounds wonderful! x


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## princessellie

:happydance: i might be married in 7 months! x


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## honeybee2

yeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!


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## JessdueJan

aww that would be lovely having it on your grandad's birthday...hope you get your wish :)


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## Midnight_Fairy

Mine are not, well we have not asked them too.

We are paying for most ourself, but my dad is buying my car so I guess that helps in some way lol xx


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## Midnight_Fairy

p.s I think they would if we asked, but if we have enough, I dont really want to ask if you get me. I may need it one day LOL. x


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## princessellie

thats what i said to my mam, i didnt want to ask but i knew if i needed help and they were able to help they wouldnt say no x


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## Tiff

My parents have always made it known that they had set aside 5k for my wedding as they did the same for my brother. With FIL passing in the spring of last year we didn't expect anything from his mom tbh. She said she's going to give us 4k to towards it, but we'll see when the time comes. She's on her own and on a fixed income so if she contributes that'd be freaking amazing, but we don't expect her to. :hugs:

Anything else above that we are going to carry out of our own pocket.

ETA: Exciting that your wedding could be pushed forward!!!!


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## princessellie

im not sure im gna be able to do it, my mam spoke to my dad and he said he is unlikely gna be able to give us 3 grand, my mam said he might be able to pay half of the full costs but i just sat and worked out costs and its gna cost me £6500 if i get everything i want, obviously i can compromise on some stuff but its my big day, i dont want to lol

i think im gna have to just keep it as feb 16th, aww i got excited i could push it forward, i wanted horse and cart and i cant have it now cos itll be too cold in feb...BOO!


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## Tiff

:( :nope:

Awww that sucks hun!!!! Can you think of other things that you are willing to sacrifice so you could have the horse and cart?


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## princessellie

i can get £200 off the price if i dont have dj :shrug: i havent even included the horse and cart in that price :nope: for £5500, i have no transport to the venue, no flowers, no centerpieces and no photos cos im not sure how much theyll cost :( x


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## slb80

My dfs mum and dad are both giving us something my mum won't be paying and penny and she is making it very clear about that!


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## slb80

slb80 said:


> My dfs mum and dad are both giving us something my mum won't be paying and penny and she is making it very clear about that!


And now I feel bad about posting that, she has just called me saying she will give me 250 towards my dress. We won't be spending thousands as it is a very small wedding


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## princessellie

aww well thats nice of her x


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## MissMummyMoo

My parents, OH's parents, my grandparents and OH nana all offered to contribute and we paid the rest.

At the end of the day its YOUR wedding not theirs. If you want to get married in a hotel go for it ... my dad wanted us to get married at a hotel in the village ... only so people didn't have to get taxis home etc ... but we didn't want to and we choose somewhere 20 mins away from where we live because it was what WE wanted :hugs: x


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## toffee87

Once we set a date, my parents offered. Oh's haven't yet, we will see!


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## Tiff

MissMummyMoo said:


> My parents, OH's parents, my grandparents and OH nana all offered to contribute and we paid the rest.
> 
> At the end of the day its YOUR wedding not theirs. If you want to get married in a hotel go for it ... my dad wanted us to get married at a hotel in the village ... only so people didn't have to get taxis home etc ... but we didn't want to and we choose somewhere 20 mins away from where we live because it was what WE wanted :hugs: x

I agree, definitely do it where you want. I've already compromised as I wanted a destination wedding but my parents refused to fly anywhere. :( My Mom then wanted us to have a small wedding at a fancy resort (only have 30 people tops) and they'd pay for it all but I was firm and said that we have lots of friend/family that we want to come. I'd have been miserable doing the wedding the way my Mom wanted and told her so.

Although if your parents are anything like mine, be prepared for sniping remarks. When my Mom and I were trying to figure out what to do with Claire the night of the wedding my Mom got all exasperated and made a comment on how THIS was why she wanted the small wedding at the resort.

:roll:


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## princess_bump

we just talked it through with my parents. they have always said they wanted to help towards whatever wedding we wanted, as they do with everything else. when we said we'd chosen disney as our destination wedding they were over the moon, thought 2 weeks away sounded good to them and offered to pay for it all as it wasn't as expensive as they thought.
i no how lucky we were, as james parents offered but never bothered in the end, didn't expect it tbh.
whenever you get married ellie, it's very exciting! xxx


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## xLaurax

I suppose our wedding is being done quite traditionally, where the day time is being paid for by my Dad and the evening is being paid for by my in-laws... Both parties offered and my dad said the only thing he wanted us to pay for was the mens suit hire and the rings, which we dont have a problem with doing :)


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## Mrs Liamxxs

_i havent asked anyone to chip in, i want to be like 'our thing' my mum would help if i asked her but i dont want to if i can help it, my dad i wouldnt ask even if i was desperate as he is one of those that likes to throw it back in your face during an argument, and as for OH's parents.....never in my lifetime will i ever ask them for anything, as far as they are concerned we are being very selfish by spending money on getting married instead of 'spoiling the children for once' they are the kind of people that think those with children (no matter how old their children are) should spend every penny and every waking minute on their kids xx_


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## princessellie

Mrs Liamxxs said:


> _i havent asked anyone to chip in, i want to be like 'our thing' my mum would help if i asked her but i dont want to if i can help it, my dad i wouldnt ask even if i was desperate as he is one of those that likes to throw it back in your face during an argument, and as for OH's parents.....never in my lifetime will i ever ask them for anything, as far as they are concerned we are being very selfish by spending money on getting married instead of 'spoiling the children for once' they are the kind of people that think those with children (no matter how old their children are) should spend every penny and every waking minute on their kids xx_

they should be paying for your whole wedding in that case :haha:


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## xLaurax

Mrs Liamxxs said:


> _i havent asked anyone to chip in, i want to be like 'our thing' my mum would help if i asked her but i dont want to if i can help it, my dad i wouldnt ask even if i was desperate as he is one of those that likes to throw it back in your face during an argument, and as for OH's parents.....never in my lifetime will i ever ask them for anything, as far as they are concerned we are being very selfish by spending money on getting married instead of 'spoiling the children for once' they are the kind of people that think those with children (no matter how old their children are) should spend every penny and every waking minute on their kids xx_


I suppose in one sense OH and I are pretty similar to your in-laws. We're not having a fancy do as we'd feel bad because we have the kids and feel money would be better spent on them :blush:


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## honeybee2

Mrs Liamxxs said:


> _i havent asked anyone to chip in, i want to be like 'our thing' my mum would help if i asked her but i dont want to if i can help it, my dad i wouldnt ask even if i was desperate as he is one of those that likes to throw it back in your face during an argument, and as for OH's parents.....never in my lifetime will i ever ask them for anything, as far as they are concerned we are being very selfish by spending money on getting married instead of 'spoiling the children for once' they are the kind of people that think those with children (no matter how old their children are) should spend every penny and every waking minute on their kids xx_

my mum is just like that- she spent her last pennies on us. Thats just her attitude though and I dont see it as a negative one really, but adults need to enjoy themselves too and your more than entitled to have a wonderful wedding!


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## krissy1984

my mum and dad is giving £5000 for the wedding, and so thats the budget we have, OH's mum won't give back the £1500 shes been owing for years now so I don't think she'll be offering and his dads very tight so would never ask him! :haha:


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## twiggy56

my parents are paying £3,500 for the venue, and have paid £1,345 for my dress so far...

OH's parents have paid for sweet eff all....:growlmad:
We'v got no money ourselves and MY parents are paying everything :nope: :grr:


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## kes_a

we never asked our familys just contributed.my dad put a lump sum into my bank account which was more than we agreed and my in laws just kept throwing money at us evan though i kept telling them things had been payed for. was very nice of them but also slightly annoying


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## sapphire20

Oh Mum and dad are paying for the meal and evening buffet, and my Parents are paying for everything else! But it works out about half each!


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## chelseaharvey

We are paying for the whole lot ourselves

OHs parents couldnt afford to contribute anything they dont earn alot

My parents are doing loads of work on a house & dont have the spare money to help us, so it is all down to us


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