# OH performance anxiety - 6 BFPs so far!!!!



## SaraJewel

Hello, I'm new here and looking for a bit of support............ I've spoken to women in other forums, but I think my situation is made even more stressful being over 35...........

We've been ttc for 7 months. Every since we stopped using birth control (condoms), my OH has only been able to "finish" once. Once in 7 months??? I can hardly believe it myself. We occasionally had this problem before ttc, but not too frequently and it never really caused us any issues.

We discussed this a couple of months ago, and he said I was putting us under too much pressure. I had been talking about how much I wanted a family a lot and how much having a baby means to me. I think he is right, I was putting us under a lot of pressure and I don't think I realised how much it was affecting him. 

I reassured him and a few days later, everything was fine in bed! I was so happy, I hadn't realised how much our problem had been affecting me. But since then, things have gone back to how they were................

I don't however use OPKs, however keep an eye on my CM to get an idea as to when I might be most fertile, but don't share this with him and never have done. In fact we don't talk about ttc at all now.

I'm going to be 39 next month, my OH is 41 and feel that time is running out for us, however I also feel I can't talk to him about it as it will put him under even more pressure, so I keep it to myself and cry on my own a lot. I don't know how much longer I can carry on like this, it feels like a stupid and impossible situation.

I was just wondering if anyone else has experienced this, if anything helped and how long they left it before thinking of getting help e.g. from counselling, Drs or even using home fertilisation.

Thank you and I suddenly feel a bit better already getting this off my chest!!


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## l8bloomer

Sarah, I also have a difficult spouse. :hugs::hugs::hugs: I think minimizing TTC talk is a good idea. Our situation is loads better now that I've stopped updating him on every little TTC development or info I come across on BnB.


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## SaraJewel

I am keeping my fingers crossed I don't need to do anything apart from be patient! I think there is a lot of pressure on guys, like everything centres around them "finishing" and I think the more they think about this, the less likely this is to happen!

I would love to just sit down with him and talk about it but think this is likely to make things worse rather than better. On the other hand, I feel like I haven't much time to be patient, aaaaaaaargh!!!


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## l8bloomer

SaraJewel said:


> I am keeping my fingers crossed I don't need to do anything apart from be patient! I think there is a lot of pressure on guys, like everything centres around them "finishing" and I think the more they think about this, the less likely this is to happen!
> 
> I would love to just sit down with him and talk about it but think this is likely to make things worse rather than better. On the other hand, I feel like I haven't much time to be patient, aaaaaaaargh!!!

Just try to not let him know you're upset. I know it's difficult but it is counter-productive. I had 'THE TALK' with mine. He says the not 'finishing' made him feel less than a man so knowing that you're upset just piles on the pressure. It will work out. Try not to stress. :hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## SaraJewel

Wow, thank you, it's good to know that other people are out there with the same problem, it makes such a difference to know you're not on your own! Good luck and let me know when you get your BFP!


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## sienasmama

Same problem here, although not as severe. At least half the time, he doesn't finish, and when he does, it takes 30+ minutes, and that's if he doesn't get a sex headache and have to stop. He has no trouble finishing on his own, which makes me wonder if it's me, even though in my head I know it's not. :( We're going to IUI next month, but as far as trying at home, I now keep cups and a few 10ml oral syringes around, just in case. He was a little uncomfortable with it at first, but now, no big deal. We can have fun together, and if he needs to finish on his own, he can and I won't be insulted, and his guys get where they need to be one way or another. LOL. Not very romantic, but you've gotta do what you've gotta do. :shrug:


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## SaraJewel

I was paranoid for the first few months that it he wasn't into me any more but we did have a talk about this and it is nothing to do with that, it is the pressure of having to finish. Actually we have moved on over the past 4 months, when we first started trying, he couldn't get started because the whole situation was so new and strange. I guess you don't realise what a big deal it is until you start trying. I foolishly assumed we would just stop using condoms, it would be more pleasurable and our sex life would be even better!!!!

We have to stay positive, not stress out (at least not to OH) and let nature take its course................. I know we are all worried about time running out, but 2 of my friends have given birth aged 38 over the past 6 months and one was an accident!


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## marie44

I wonder if it would help if you could tell him ov was a different time or just downplay your desire to get pg right now. My dh had issues a few times but it was mostly when i told him we had to bd that night & it was so important. Once i told him i stopped keeping track of my cycle & it will happen when it happens, he didn't have any issues anymore. I do feel bad for guys in general bc it is a lot of pressure for them. GL & keep us updated!


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## Zeri

My DH has had issues with this too. It's a difficult situation! I reallly feel for you! :(

Is it possible you could have him 'finish' into a receptacle - and then inseminate it? I've heard women doing this before and getting pregnant. You may have to do some more research on it to see how it's really done, though. But maybe a situation like that (masturbating in private) might take off some of the performance pressure?


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## SaraJewel

Thanks for all the responses! I've been playing the whole thing down about pregnancy, and.......... it's started to work! I think we will still run into problems in the future but I am hopeful that things will improve. And if things don't then I think looking at artificial methods of insemination would be my next step.

I think the key was that we both needed to relax and stop putting so much pressure on ourselves. Easier said than done though!


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## HPMINI

Definitely have the same issue! I avoided telling him about relevant dates but then got frustrated on those vital dates which always coincided with "I'm tired"! 
I also have an issue (especially when I haven't stressed the importance) that he doesn't finish because he is trying hard to hold on to give me more pleasure and then gets more tired. Arghhh!


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## SaraJewel

Yes, I am wondering if this is going to happen to us too! I am hoping that we will get lucky and bd on the vital dates without having to make a big issue out of it!

I think my OH hangs on for me too through force of habit, he is not a selfish lover but at this stage, I wouldn't mind!

Are you still telling him about your ovulation dates then HPMINI?


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## threebirds

Hi good luck ladies. My OH is told when im fertile coz otherwise we wouldnt get to dtd a few times at the right time. It is stressful, so a few mnths back i explained about softcups and how some people use them for insemination. That has taken a good bit of pressure off. Next cycle we used only softcups AI, now we're at half and half (maybe 2 bd and 2 softcup goes during my fertile window). I let him decide. 
Anyway, hope things get easier x


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## SaraJewel

How do you use softcups?


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## threebirds

Hi Sarah
Some people put them in after dtd to keep the swimmers up there. 

We, like others who use them for AI put the semen directly in the cup, I insert preseed then insert the cup and keep it in place for a few wks. There are lengthy threads on here but not sure where. Will post link if I find them. Softcups are normally used for menstruation. There are other similiar products like mooncups but apparently the softcup sits higher on the cervix so is the one to use. Try googling softcup & ttc.
Good luck x


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## threebirds

Haha oops typo alert- keep it in for a few HRS not WKS!!!
I thought OH would never go for it but coz he was so stressed about 'performing on demand' he totally went for it. Now I try and make it the backup plan. So if bding isnt really wrking then the softcups come out.


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## SaraJewel

Thanks! Something to keep up my sleeve! Ha Ha, I thought Weeks was a bit extreme!!!


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## SaraJewel

Feel the need to vent! I hope someone out there is listening...........

So we managed to DTD successfully (i.e. with OH finishing) once last month and it was around the time of ovulation I think (judging by CM). I was elated!!!!

Then followed the longest 2 weeks of my life I think............... I managed to convince myself I was pregnant. I felt I had all these symptoms I had never had before and that I must be pregnant. But AF came today (CD30). Oh I feel so foolish, have had a little cry, but am trying hard not to have my own pity party. 

Feels like a steep hill to climb to start all over again worrying about whether he's going to finish, whether we'll have sex at the right time (I can't tell him when is the right time as that'll add to the stress of it all!) and then if we do, if I will even get pregnant.

How do you girls keep going????


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## l8bloomer

SaraJewel said:


> Feel the need to vent! I hope someone out there is listening...........
> 
> So we managed to DTD successfully (i.e. with OH finishing) once last month and it was around the time of ovulation I think (judging by CM). I was elated!!!!
> 
> Then followed the longest 2 weeks of my life I think............... I managed to convince myself I was pregnant. I felt I had all these symptoms I had never had before and that I must be pregnant. But AF came today (CD30). Oh I feel so foolish, have had a little cry, but am trying hard not to have my own pity party.
> 
> Feels like a steep hill to climb to start all over again worrying about whether he's going to finish, whether we'll have sex at the right time (I can't tell him when is the right time as that'll add to the stress of it all!) and then if we do, if I will even get pregnant.
> 
> How do you girls keep going????

:hugs::hugs::hugs: I have a difficult one as well. Hope keeps me going and I know there's reason to hope because my aunt had her first baby at 45 naturally, after many months of trying as well as 2 unsuccessful IVF cycles. Her happy and healthy little one is now 3. 

It will happen.:dust::dust::dust:


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## SaraJewel

It will happen! I am feeling better now I've gotten over the initial disappointment. This was the first month since ttc (past 7 months) that we were actually in with a chance.

Thank you, how are you doing anyway? Have you had a good month? How long have you been ttc?

Wow, you're over in Canada, never been there but always wanted to.

I want to insert some baby dust but don't know how!!!!


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## HPMINI

I am a bit subtle on ovulation dates - I tend to have to just grit my teeth when before I get chance to comment he tells me that he's tired!
However, a couple of weeks ago on holiday when there was a superb opportunity, although maybe not ovulation time I was toooo tired!!!
Anyway my cycle is a bit mucked up this month. I don't know what's going on!


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> I am a bit subtle on ovulation dates - I tend to have to just grit my teeth when before I get chance to comment he tells me that he's tired!
> However, a couple of weeks ago on holiday when there was a superb opportunity, although maybe not ovulation time I was toooo tired!!!
> Anyway my cycle is a bit mucked up this month. I don't know what's going on!


Sigh, it is hard isn't it? I know, I have been too tired too and got so stressed last month. I swear, I have done everything in my power for the past month not to even talk about ttc, it can be exhausting!

Trying to be a bit more positive and laid back this month. I am hoping our holiday next month will be good timing!

What's going on with your cycle? Is AF due soon? 

Mine is between 27 and 35 days, although more normally not more than 30 days, think being stressed has affected things more recently.


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## HPMINI

Well, about a day before AF was due the digital ovulation kit told me I had reached peak fertility having "told" me I had high fertility from earlier on in the month until day 26 - maybe day 13. So AF is due about two weeks from last thursday around about 20th April. Usually my cycle is 27 to 29 days but I can't work out how I have managed to delay ovulation for nearly two weeks! I went on an overseas holiday which I often find stressful, packing, flights, airports etc. I now have the symptoms that I often get in the 2WW before AF. 
OH did comment at the weekend that it must be nearly "project" time but I am so confused! Roll on 20th!! Not having AF for 6 weeks will be a bit odd though!


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## SaraJewel

That does sound odd! Mind you, my period is often late by around a week if I go away, even it it's just somewhere in the UK! I got a bit confused with all of your dates, but sounds like your period is late. Have you thought about doing a test or have you already done one?


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## HPMINI

Period is late - not quite a week - will be a week on friday or saturday.
Just the fact that kit showed peak fertility on the day before AF was due is confusing me and I wonder whether period will show up 13-15 days later.

Haven't done a test yet. If it weren't for the o kit, I would be blissfully unaware of my very odd peak date and probably would be thinking about doing one.

Not sure I can bear waiting for another week or so to see if AF arrives very late though so may give in to find an answer! Arggh! I've been waiting for ages for this time to arrive and now it could be - I've become a wimp!

I even missed my blood donor appointment tonight as they ask is there any chance you could be pregnant - and I'm not sure what I would answer!! And they would send me away.


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## SaraJewel

I have always said that I'll wait until I'm a week late until I test. So far I haven't been longer than a week late, have been very tempted to test thought, but was glad I waited (in the end AF showed up) as I'm worried I might get addicted to doing tests!

P.S. Fingers crossed for you and GL!!!


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## HPMINI

I have ordered a cheap HPT off ebay which probably will arrive Monday or Tuesday next week. I think if AF hasn't arrived by the time the HPT arrives it will be a sign to test!

I really cannot get my hopes up though in case the holiday mucked up my cycle.
I admit, they are a tiny bit!!


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## SaraJewel

Good luck and good plan! Nothing wrong with getting your hopes up...........

How long have you been ttc for? Will this be your 1st?


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## HPMINI

Trying for my first! I will be 39 at the end of June :( Birthdays make me sad. I was even sad when we entered 2012 as I knew it was the year I turned 39. Looks really odd written down because I don't feel it!
I suppose I came off the pill about two years ago but because of shift work I can't say we have actually been trying all that time! Sometimes we just don't get together!
I have made my husband more aware of the project in the last 6 months before that although he knew I wasn't on the pill we weren't really concentrating on it.
I have waited because until now I don't think it has been the right time. 
Husband is 48 - not that he acts it!!!
How is it with you?


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## l8bloomer

SaraJewel said:


> It will happen! I am feeling better now I've gotten over the initial disappointment. This was the first month since ttc (past 7 months) that we were actually in with a chance.
> 
> Thank you, how are you doing anyway? Have you had a good month? How long have you been ttc?
> 
> Wow, you're over in Canada, never been there but always wanted to.
> 
> I want to insert some baby dust but don't know how!!!!

Hi Sara:flower:, Yes, I'm in Canada, the West Coast, in BC to be exact. 

We've been NTNP for over 10 years but seriously TTC for about 6 cycles. I'm not as stressed out anymore because I'm going to be doing IVF in a couple of months. We're still trying to get a baby naturally in the meantime though. 

I'm 4 DPO now and in the 2WW. Hopefully I'll get the BFP. Hope you are doing well. :dust::dust::dust:

Btw, just click on more in the smilies section to the right. The pop-up window will have the option for baby dust.:thumbup:


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## SaraJewel

l8bloomer said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> It will happen! I am feeling better now I've gotten over the initial disappointment. This was the first month since ttc (past 7 months) that we were actually in with a chance.
> 
> Thank you, how are you doing anyway? Have you had a good month? How long have you been ttc?
> 
> Wow, you're over in Canada, never been there but always wanted to.
> 
> I want to insert some baby dust but don't know how!!!!
> 
> Hi Sara:flower:, Yes, I'm in Canada, the West Coast, in BC to be exact.
> 
> We've been NTNP for over 10 years but seriously TTC for about 6 cycles. I'm not as stressed out anymore because I'm going to be doing IVF in a couple of months. We're still trying to get a baby naturally in the meantime though.
> 
> I'm 4 DPO now and in the 2WW. Hopefully I'll get the BFP. Hope you are doing well. :dust::dust::dust:
> 
> Btw, just click on more in the smilies section to the right. The pop-up window will have the option for baby dust.:thumbup:Click to expand...

Glad you are not stressed, good luck with trying and your IVF.

I am CD10 today, don't track ovulation but think it it probably around CD15-20 somewhere so had better get busy soonish!!!!:dust:


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> Trying for my first! I will be 39 at the end of June :( Birthdays make me sad. I was even sad when we entered 2012 as I knew it was the year I turned 39. Looks really odd written down because I don't feel it!
> I suppose I came off the pill about two years ago but because of shift work I can't say we have actually been trying all that time! Sometimes we just don't get together!
> I have made my husband more aware of the project in the last 6 months before that although he knew I wasn't on the pill we weren't really concentrating on it.
> I have waited because until now I don't think it has been the right time.
> Husband is 48 - not that he acts it!!!
> How is it with you?

Well, I am almost the same age as you, but we have only been trying for 7-8 months. We were properly trying, but it took a bit of getting used to at the start, then got very stressful, problems with OH finishing all the time. We are now NTNP and have been successful a couple of times recently, but it still doesn't feel back to normal and I think he still finds it quite stressful. I get stressed worrying about whether he will get stressed so we are both a couple of stressheads it is so stressful!

Having said that, we have a great relationship and I am going to try and be more chilled out this month.....

I know what you mean about birthdays, I really want to give birth before I am 40, I don't know why, it is only a number after all and doesn't mean anything really! I hope this/next month is our month.............:)


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## HPMINI

Hi SaraJewel
I've done a HPT this morning and if I am not mistaken - this month is my month!


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> Hi SaraJewel
> I've done a HPT this morning and if I am not mistaken - this month is my month!

Oh My God that is amazing!!!!! So super happy for you! I guessed you wouldn't be able to wait til next week x :thumbup:


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> Hi SaraJewel
> I've done a HPT this morning and if I am not mistaken - this month is my month!

How are you feeling??!!

Meant to ask, how did you get over the whole performance anxiety issue with your OH? We haven't gotten off to the best start this month and I am started to feel stressed out already :sad1:

I am really happy about your news tho, congrats again :happydance:


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## HPMINI

Hello!
Just booked my first midwife appointment. It seems they take your word for it on the HPT and I don't need to see my doctor. I did just buy one of those clearblue ones that gives you an idea of timing. Fortunately it confirmed that I am apparently pregnant! That's a relief.
The performance anxiety thing - hmmm! I suppose I told him almost straight after my period finished that it was a good week! But wasn't overly exact on dates. It stressed me out when I knew it was an important date and he wasn't around. Once we started on a roll it was easier to continue having regular sex. Rather than it being a mission! I don't know how we managed last month!! 

Feel a bit bad that the midwife asked me for the date of my last period as I knew she would and I am not too sure!! Not sure I recorded it too well! Oops! 
I have my fingers tightly crossed that nothing will go wrong. It's horrid but I keep expecting to go to the toilet and find that my period has started. I guess I'll get out of that habit.
A few people at work know - sadly they know before my family do but their paths don't cross so all will be fine!
Good luck though and I recommend pre-seed, tmi, but it makes for more of an enjoyable experience.


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## Seity

Just wanted to give some hope to those ladies who's husbands have issues that you only need to have sex once to get that BFP. My husband can't finish if he's stressed and he's very easily stressed. We only manage sex about once every 2 months, so when we were ttc I tracked my cycles and used opks, so that I could make that one time count. It took 3 times before I managed to get my OH to :sex: in my fertile window, but that was all it took and I got my BFP 2 weeks later. I was 35 at the time (And only one month away from turning 36).
:dust:


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> Hello!
> Just booked my first midwife appointment. It seems they take your word for it on the HPT and I don't need to see my doctor. I did just buy one of those clearblue ones that gives you an idea of timing. Fortunately it confirmed that I am apparently pregnant! That's a relief.
> The performance anxiety thing - hmmm! I suppose I told him almost straight after my period finished that it was a good week! But wasn't overly exact on dates. It stressed me out when I knew it was an important date and he wasn't around. Once we started on a roll it was easier to continue having regular sex. Rather than it being a mission! I don't know how we managed last month!!
> 
> Feel a bit bad that the midwife asked me for the date of my last period as I knew she would and I am not too sure!! Not sure I recorded it too well! Oops!
> I have my fingers tightly crossed that nothing will go wrong. It's horrid but I keep expecting to go to the toilet and find that my period has started. I guess I'll get out of that habit.
> A few people at work know - sadly they know before my family do but their paths don't cross so all will be fine!
> Good luck though and I recommend pre-seed, tmi, but it makes for more of an enjoyable experience.

Aww, it all sounds great, I am so pleased for you and I am keeping my fingers crossed for you!!! I am trying to stay calm and carry on, nearly lost it last night got so stressed but feeling much calmer today!

All the very best for your pregnancy and your new addition :happydance:


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## SaraJewel

Seity said:


> Just wanted to give some hope to those ladies who's husbands have issues that you only need to have sex once to get that BFP. My husband can't finish if he's stressed and he's very easily stressed. We only manage sex about once every 2 months, so when we were ttc I tracked my cycles and used opks, so that I could make that one time count. It took 3 times before I managed to get my OH to :sex: in my fertile window, but that was all it took and I got my BFP 2 weeks later. I was 35 at the time (And only one month away from turning 36).
> :dust:


I was just thinking, I wonder if anyone has any success story, and here is yours! Thank you for sharing, we have had a couple of successful attempts recently over the past 7 months in terms of completing the act, but no BFP so far! So I suppose things are getting better.............

Thanks again!!!


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## HPMINI

SaraJewel
My other top tip - I think I heard it on a day time show too - after you had have bd - stay laying down, don't get up for at least 20 minutes!
Good luck to you! 
And following Seity's message I am pretty sure that last month we only manage to bd once in the fertile window!


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## SaraJewel

Hi! Good to hear from you. Hope things are going well. Are you feeling OK?

Things are improving, slowly but surely! 

What programme did you hear your 20min tip on? I need to be careful as am prone to urine infections.........

I am now in the 2WW, not overly confident but at least there is some hope now x


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## HPMINI

I think it was on This Morning - Dr Chris. I think the feeling was you need to give the sperm a chance rather than tipping it up to get up to go to the loo soon after!
I'm doing fine. Can't wait until Friday next week for my appointment and praying that nothing goes wrong!


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## peanutpup

SaraJewel said:


> Hi! Good to hear from you. Hope things are going well. Are you feeling OK?
> 
> Things are improving, slowly but surely!
> 
> What programme did you hear your 20min tip on? I need to be careful as am prone to urine infections.........
> 
> I am now in the 2WW, not overly confident but at least there is some hope now x

Hi Sara I am prone to uti's myself and I always wait 30-40 mins after bd 
and have no problems--just don't wait longer than an hour to pee and you will be fine:thumbup:


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## SaraJewel

Thanks PeanutPup! Will lie about for a bit longer next time!

HPMINI good luck for your appointment! Glad you are feeling OK x


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## peanutpup

you are most welcome!


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## peanutpup

Congrats Hp:happydance:--fx'd everything goes well for your appt--I am sure it will be text book:thumbup:


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## greenjelly

I am so pleased to see this thread! Can I join please?! I have experienced exactly these problems. Im 39 (40 in October so I have missed the stage of giving birth before I'm 40), OH is 48 and not quite as keen as I am on the baby thing but he is doing his best. I think I tell him too much about my dates and fertile times - I read you shouldn't tell the man too much TTC information. My other problem is he is quite well endowed and I tell myself to just put up with the 'agony' as the end result will be worth it but if we end up without a 'result' I feel quite annoyed that I have suffered the pain for nothing! Is that terrible? 
This month, we did it quite a lot at hopefully the right times so I am too on TWW. And getting more and more obsessed with TCC forums! 

Baby dust all! (need to get better at using emoticons...)

:haha:


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## kelly1973

HI can i join i too have this problem and oh little man would go soft as he said there was too much pressure it was destroying me, im on my two week wait at the min i bought some viagra so theres a little bit of hope this month look at my chart i didnt get to do it on ov day im also 39 and had a mmc in dec 2012 xxx


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## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> HI can i join i too have this problem and oh little man would go soft as he said there was too much pressure it was destroying me, im on my two week wait at the min i bought some viagra so theres a little bit of hope this month look at my chart i didnt get to do it on ov day im also 39 and had a mmc in dec 2012 xxx

Kelly, our cycles are more or less the same! It does help knowing that others are going through the same processes and thoughts! We think it's so straight forward for the man, I guess they have pressures and worries of their own.


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## kelly1973

hey green how many days past ov are you.. im obsessed with this site do you have an ovulation chart? this is the best chance ive had this month still not feeling hopeful but i guess its my way of dealing with it. do you have any children already or is ttc1 like me


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## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> hey green how many days past ov are you.. im obsessed with this site do you have an ovulation chart? this is the best chance ive had this month still not feeling hopeful but i guess its my way of dealing with it. do you have any children already or is ttc1 like me

I too am going for number 1. Slow starter. No chart. Using CB ov sticks. Got a smiley face on Friday so I'm guessing I am 4dpo today. Im beginning to get obsessed with this site. It cant be healthy to think so much about symptoms and dates can it? :wacko:


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## kelly1973

i know its crazy eh. i got my positive on fri,we can wait together and happily sympton spot together xx


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## greenjelly

Sara Jewel, didnt mean to hijack your thread. How are you going in the TWW?


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## Dani402

I don't know how often you're trying, but from what I've read...suggestions have been to give him a couple of days off (just before O) and to make sure he's not *doing anything* before you get to him, so he's built up some...  Good luck this cycle!


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## SaraJewel

Welcome greenjelly, Kelly and Dani!

No problems re hijacking thread, it's not mine really we can share it!

2WW much better than last time when I was totally obsessed by symptoms, which of course ended in disappointment. I've read that usually you wouldn't see symptoms til after AF is due, body gears up for pregnancy every month so AF and Preg symptoms can be pretty much the same! That's what I'm telling myself this month as I did get too obsessed last month.

Anyhow, we only had one success this months in delivering the goods so I am not overly hopeful!

By the way Kelly & Greenjelly, I think I also ovulated last Friday (this is a guess as I only look at CM) or thereabouts. My cycle is generally around 30 days.


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## HPMINI

Fingers crossed for you though SaraJewel, one delivery of goods is definitely better than nothing!!

Definitely AF and preg symptoms are similar! Honestly, I managed to convince myself that I had just ovulated late!!

I definitely recommend the expense of a Clearblue digital monitor. Have a look on ebay. It does help to understand your cycles. The sticks are not cheap but I am glad I got one.


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## kelly1973

hi sara cool so were on the tww together xxx im glad you said that as was getting worried as have had no symptons upto date,the only thing that would be nice to get me throughtww is a glass of wine lol


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## greenjelly

Well today I had some tummy aches, I have lots of EWCM (but I might get that every month at this time - Im just so aware of every little sign!) and I had a pretty bad dizzy spell on my way home from work. So of course my mind is working overtime but Sara, I think you are right. Far too early to feel anything. Im not going to test until well after AF is due. Why put myself through the agony!!


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## HPMINI

greenjelly - I left it a week before testing.


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## greenjelly

HPMINI said:


> greenjelly - I left it a week before testing.

A week after :witch: was due? Thanks HPMini.


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## kelly1973

im guna test 10dpo


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## SaraJewel

Well I feel like I have horrendous PMT: tired, grumpy, feel fat and sore BBs! Exactly the same as last month! 

HPMINI, did you feel the same as you did every month then? Or do you not usually get PMT symptoms?

I will not test until I am a week late. There, I've said it!!!


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## kelly1973

wow sara your strong i want sore boobys i had them bad last time no symptons here gutted i feel im out already


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## SaraJewel

I'm not sure it makes a difference! Some women have said that they had no symptoms and then found out they were pregnant!

Yeah, I say I won't test til 1 week now but..............!


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## kelly1973

yeah i thought id be strong but im addicted to poas lol


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> yeah i thought id be strong but im addicted to poas lol

Well, I have been a week late before then got my AF exactly a week late to the day so feel I should wait! Slim odds for this month tho, have to be realistic (not being pessimistic!!!):wacko:


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## kelly1973

this was my first month that i had even a glimmer of a hope as we actually dtd twice which trust me is a miracle lately, it gets me down every month trying to be strong on testing but you know how it is. do you temp etc


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> this was my first month that i had even a glimmer of a hope as we actually dtd twice which trust me is a miracle lately, it gets me down every month trying to be strong on testing but you know how it is. do you temp etc

No, am wary of putting more pressure on myself and OH by doing tests. Just look at CM. I am hoping we are more successful in months to come, we DTD more regularly than we used to but not always successful in terms of finishing. How about you?


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## kelly1973

exactly the same on says he feels pressured so i dont talk about babys but how can i ever get pregnant if he cant do it its heartbreaking so this month was a good one compared to usual,it doesnt seem fair im quite envious at these girls that can dtd every night or follow smep


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> exactly the same on says he feels pressured so i dont talk about babys but how can i ever get pregnant if he cant do it its heartbreaking so this month was a good one compared to usual,it doesnt seem fair im quite envious at these girls that can dtd every night or follow smep


We only did it successfully once for each of the past 3 months. The 4 months before we had no successes at all. It was awful, frustrating and I cried all the time. 

I know what you mean, I read posts all the time from girls who say they don't think they have BD'd enough, then go on to say they did it 4 times prior to ovulation!!!! My OH has recently asked to know when the important time is to do it, so I am giving him a vague timeframe as to be honest I don't know the exact date myself (and think it might be best to keep it this way).

It's comforting to meet people in the same position. How long have you been trying?


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## kelly1973

i got pregnant by accident last year and had amiscarriage in dec my whole world fell apart so since than as now desperate for a little bean. this is what i did as for the last three months we didnt do it no i take my temp and use opks and then you know when its guna happen and this time only because oh saw how sad i was we used viagra and it worked as we dtd twice before ovulation i dread it each month


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## curleymumma

Hey ladies,

i work in the area of sexual health- while i cant give out proffesional advice to individuals, there are some basic ways to help this- 

-1- dont blame yourself, even though i may suggest things you can do, thats becasue YOu CAN do some things, not becasue its your fault or responsibilty to fix it.

-2-if your OH has given consent to have a baby, then cut all TTC talk out completely, evenything nada, do everything you can with lifetyle and supplements without talking to him about it at all.

-3- for the women who are having real trouble (like OH cant finnish most of the time) sacrifice one cycle for the sake of the rest- just slightly pull away sexually, let him make the advances and if he doest don't worry, take the pressure off completely. THen after a few weeks of that, start to experiment- lingere, new places, toys, music, etc- make the sexual energy electric and if he doesn't finish, don't worry, he will.

-4- remember women are more attractive to men wen they are ovulating, but men pick up on this at a subconsciose level, your smell, your taste, your body all alter slightly around this time, let this natural beauty flow through you rather than thinking of ways to convince him into bed, be filled with the sexual goddess that you are!

-5- those of you who have OH's pushing 40- remember that mens sexual peak is past by this point, and if your between 30-45 you are IN your peak. Putting pressure on a man to perform like he used to will be counterproductive. But you can use your sexual peak and confidence to your advantage- look at it from a sexual rather than TTC point of view- 

----finally, good luck!---


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> i got pregnant by accident last year and had amiscarriage in dec my whole world fell apart so since than as now desperate for a little bean. this is what i did as for the last three months we didnt do it no i take my temp and use opks and then you know when its guna happen and this time only because oh saw how sad i was we used viagra and it worked as we dtd twice before ovulation i dread it each month

I am so sorry for your loss, it sounds like it was devastating.

I hate this 2WW. AF is due on Weds at the earliest and I feel terrible, horrible PMT symptoms. When is AF due for you? Good luck to you and glad you had a more successful month. It's hard isn't it?


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## kelly1973

it is and makes it harder for us as we have all the dread and dissapointment ahead of if it is actually guna happen. im due af at the weekend not got any symptons at the moment so not feeling very positive


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## kelly1973

just saw were the same age hun xxx


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> just saw were the same age hun xxx

We are!!! I think we have to stay positive though, let's try and keep each other upbeat! If it doesn't happen this month, there is always next month :)


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## kelly1973

its a deal hopefully bump buddies to be xxx


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## rubiemckinney

Hi Sarah:

My ex husband had a similar problem. We enlisted the help of a therapist and then she referred us to a sex therapist (she was not covered by insurance and was expensive). Needless to say, it never helped our TTC. One day I came home from work early and found EX DH masterbating to porn. So I finally found out why he wasn't performing with me it was because he was masterbating everyday after he got home. He worked nights and I worked days. I ended up making him my ex-husband because I found his actions to be so selfish and inconsiderate when he knew that we were TTC and my heart was crushed. I am not saying this about your DH but sometimes men don't know how to tell us women that they have no interest in TTC. They pretend at least that was the case in my situation. Big hugs and I wish you the best!


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## rubiemckinney

Oh and one more thing. He went to the doctor to get a workup and they found nothing wrong with him. It wasn't meds or poor health or anything of the sort. He also was prescribed viagra, levitra, and cealis. After I threw him out I found all of the unopened prescription bottles--unused. It was a very sad day for me.


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## curleymumma

rubiemckinney said:


> Oh and one more thing. He went to the doctor to get a workup and they found nothing wrong with him. It wasn't meds or poor health or anything of the sort. He also was prescribed viagra, levitra, and cealis. After I threw him out I found all of the unopened prescription bottles--unused. It was a very sad day for me.

im so sorry to hear that- sometimes i just want to scream---MEN SUCK!!!!---


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## rubiemckinney

Thank you CurleyMumma! I really appreciate that!


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## kelly1973

rubie what a strong lady you are for getting rid gud on ya xxxx


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## rubiemckinney

Thanks Kelly!


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## SaraJewel

Yep, sounds like he was bad for you!

I am glad I'm not in the same situation, we are very honest with each other. 

I'm guessing you have a better guy now??!!


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## kelly1973

hi sara you tested yet bfn for me today back to the nitemare of dtd xx


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> hi sara you tested yet bfn for me today back to the nitemare of dtd xx

Hi, nope AF due from today onwards, but has been a week late before so not gonna test yet. I am expecting AF on Friday.

Were you due AF today? I am sorry about your BFN :(


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## SaraJewel

SaraJewel said:


> kelly1973 said:
> 
> 
> hi sara you tested yet bfn for me today back to the nitemare of dtd xx
> 
> Hi, nope AF due from today onwards, but has been a week late before so not gonna test yet. I am expecting AF on Friday.
> 
> Were you due AF today? I am sorry about your BFN :(Click to expand...


AF today. Never mind, feeling OK, focusing on next month now!

How's everyone else doing?


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## kelly1973

hi sara af due tomoz for me but mega cramps so shes coming,im glad your focused gets me down thinking about it as puts a lot of strain on me and oh


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## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> hi sara af due tomoz for me but mega cramps so shes coming,im glad your focused gets me down thinking about it as puts a lot of strain on me and oh

hi Kelly and Sara
Been off site for a while. Sorry about the arrival of :witch: today, Sara. Not fun. 
Kelly how are the pains?


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## kelly1973

shes def on way im very emotional shell be here tomoz not looking forward to the month ahead can feel the dread welling hows you, where are you in your cycle?


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> shes def on way im very emotional shell be here tomoz not looking forward to the month ahead can feel the dread welling hows you, where are you in your cycle?

I felt very over emotional just before AF arrived, then better once she did. Hormones make me feel horrendous (major PMS). 

We should support each other in the month ahead because you are right, it is difficult and emotional. I am already starting to worry that we will have problems......... Worrying isn't going to help tho!!!!!

How are you feeling today?


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## kelly1973

feel bit better still waiting but know its coming, thats a deal to support each other cause you will know exactly where im coming from when we get our forever babies we will know how bloody hard it was to get there xxx


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## greenjelly

Its so crummy isnt it? Its not even like having a period is any fun. Might not be so awful if we could think "oh well, Im not pregnant but I get to have another period". Its so grim - pain, yuckiness, grumpiness. (I am particularly grumpy today. cant see the appeal in anything at all). 
Im just so fed up with checking the ovulation calendars, POAS, thinking about every symptom. Wish I could just put it all out of mind and if baby comes along, well and good. All this thinking is so draining!


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## kelly1973

i know green its pants isnt it its on my mind 24 7 it never leaves


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> i know green its pants isnt it its on my mind 24 7 it never leaves

Green and Kelly,

I know, it's hard work isn't it? Big hill to climb each month and all that uncertainty about whether OH will be able to deliver the goods. 

We're in it together tho!!! Let's take May in our stride. Help each other stay positive.

I am CD5. How about you girls?:winkwink:


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## kelly1973

CD2 here sara i usually ov between day 10 and day 12 how bout you? yep think we should try not to stress this month as apparently that affects our fertility.


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> CD2 here sara i usually ov between day 10 and day 12 how bout you? yep think we should try not to stress this month as apparently that affects our fertility.

Em, not 100% sure but think somewhere between CD11 and CD19. Don't do OPKs so just base it on CM.

How long is your cycle? Mine usually pretty regular 28-30 days with occasional >30 but never been over 35.


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## kelly1973

im 25 to 26 every month, do you not fancy doing opk oh never need know you do them it gives you the best chance


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> im 25 to 26 every month, do you not fancy doing opk oh never need know you do them it gives you the best chance

I've thought about it, but think it would stress me out too much if I knew it was time to DTD and he couldn't finish. I am still thinking about it but will see how the next couple of months go I think.


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## HPMINI

I actually found it was quite good to have a testing kit because sometimes before I got one, I was stressed that we were not able to have sex at the right time and actually having started testing discovered that it wasn't the right time anyway. 
The month I conceived the testing kit didn't tell me what date I had peak fertility anyway - just showed high.


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## kelly1973

it helps me as when i get a plus i know at least ive given my best i bought viagra last month it did wonders


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> it helps me as when i get a plus i know at least ive given my best i bought viagra last month it did wonders

Thanks HPMINI and Kelly. I think I will check out OPKs next month just to check I am definitely ovulating when I think I am. 

Feeling quite exhausted by the whole process at the moment to be honest, finding it hard to stay positive.

How is everyone else?


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## kelly1973

same as you sara really not looking forward to the month ahead when i read about other ladies doing the smep plan i get so envious dtd is a bloody nitemare at times you should really try opk it really means you def have the best chance you dont have to tell other half when you get a plus


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> same as you sara really not looking forward to the month ahead when i read about other ladies doing the smep plan i get so envious dtd is a bloody nitemare at times you should really try opk it really means you def have the best chance you dont have to tell other half when you get a plus

Yes, you're right it's hard to read about others DTD every other day (or more sometimes!) and then worrying they haven't done it enough!

We are trying to give this month more of a go. Fingers crossed. CD11 today. It would be nice to be able to forget about it for a while, but like you say it's hard and is generally always on my mind.

Having said that, feeling more positive than a few days ago.


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## kelly1973

me too sara fingers crossed eh, people on another thread i use are all getting pregnant and seem to dtd every bloody day lucky sods, im really hoping this is our month xxx


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> me too sara fingers crossed eh, people on another thread i use are all getting pregnant and seem to dtd every bloody day lucky sods, im really hoping this is our month xxx

I really hope so, although it is a bit hit and miss with us at the moment. Really affects my mood, one minute I'm :thumbup:the next I'm :nope:

Let's keep going and keep positive (no matter how hard it might seem!)


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## kelly1973

hugs sara i know how you feel wat i do is temp up to ov and do opk to know when i ov so i get the best chance to dtd i have two viagra tabs left for this month least theh you know when you did it it was the best chance its prob affecting other half as he feels that hes letting you down, it took few weeks for other half to say yes to taking these, were in this together xxxx


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## gustav72

Hi, I'm a bit late getting in on this thread...actually took a few weeks break from the boards and it was adding to my constant thoughts on TTC. I know how you feel..I'll be 40 in November and we've been TTC since December...in April the stress levels were pretty high for both of us and my wonderful man had some performance issues...we decided to take a small break from TTC and we are starting up again this month...I am a bit nervous the same thing will happen again, but know we have to move forward with TTC. My partner and I both desperately want to get pregnant and communicate openly about the stress of TTC. I've decided to not talk about it so much and give us both a break, although I still think of it every day. I'm thinking of you and sending you positive thoughts...


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> hugs sara i know how you feel wat i do is temp up to ov and do opk to know when i ov so i get the best chance to dtd i have two viagra tabs left for this month least theh you know when you did it it was the best chance its prob affecting other half as he feels that hes letting you down, it took few weeks for other half to say yes to taking these, were in this together xxxx

Yes, I'm sure he is feeling fed up as well. I am not letting it show (as far as I know!) and trying to keep upbeat at least on the outside.

Viagra wouldn't help us as OH doesn't have any problems in that way, it's finishing off that sometimes is the problem. 

Hugs back to you as well. I still have time I think this month.............so keeping those fingers crossed!!! (for me and for you!)


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## SaraJewel

gustav72 said:


> Hi, I'm a bit late getting in on this thread...actually took a few weeks break from the boards and it was adding to my constant thoughts on TTC. I know how you feel..I'll be 40 in November and we've been TTC since December...in April the stress levels were pretty high for both of us and my wonderful man had some performance issues...we decided to take a small break from TTC and we are starting up again this month...I am a bit nervous the same thing will happen again, but know we have to move forward with TTC. My partner and I both desperately want to get pregnant and communicate openly about the stress of TTC. I've decided to not talk about it so much and give us both a break, although I still think of it every day. I'm thinking of you and sending you positive thoughts...

Welcome Gustav! I feel nervous every month and then elated when things go well but depressed/anxious when they don't..........

I have defo found talking about it less helps. Things are better than they were. Like you tho, I think about it every day.

Positive thoughts to you too!!!


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## kelly1973

Hi gustav welcome to our thread,ive found that not mentioning trying to concieve at all has worked wonders if oh knew how much i think about it do you temp etc im an addict of poas lol


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> Hi gustav welcome to our thread,ive found that not mentioning trying to concieve at all has worked wonders if oh knew how much i think about it do you temp etc im an addict of poas lol

I know, if he knew how much I thought about it I think it would totally freak him out! Feeling down today, too many babies around and too many pregnant people. I don't think this is going to be our month.......... :nope:


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## HPMINI

I tried to keep it from him as much as possible but there was a couple of times when I was so irritated when he told me he was tired that I just had to snap! I then used to tell him almost as soon as my period had finished that it was a good week! That seemed to work better as it took stress out of it being particular days.

And I so know what you mean about too many babies and too many pregnant people - it really does hurt I know and trying to sound like you are genuinely offering congratulations.

I have my fingers crossed for you all! I am quite nervous looking after my bean - it has been nearly ten weeks but I want to be able to relax!


----------



## kelly1973

Hi hp how far on are you??

Sara dont be down this is our month i think if you do opk s at least you would know just dont let oh know its not that your going behind his back just helping your futures along it helps me loads knowing what my bodies doing seeing as thereonly such a short window you can get pregnant in in this together its our month xxxxxxxx


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## viccat

I hope you don't mind me popping up on this thread. It is a thread I keep coming back to - not because OH has performance anxiety as such, but we only DTD a couple of times a month. It's just the way he is, and to be honest I'm happy with that for 3 weeks every month :shy:

This is month 4, and I reckon there was only last month that we were anywhere near DTD at the right date. I think one month we didn't DTD at all - does that even count as TTC? :(

So..... I've got a CBFM, and started using it this month. CD8 but only got the next couple of weekends as my beloved is away for the next couple of weeks. Fingers crossed for this weekend, that the timing is right, and he's not too tired.

Glad to join you all on this admittedly difficult journey. :flower:


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## HPMINI

Kelly

I'm 10 weeks along! Eek! It took so long to finally get here. I am sure the CBFM helped me though. Glad not to have the expense of it at the moment though but it was worth every penny! I get a scan in two weeks!


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## kelly1973

Hi viccat welcome to our thread,least when you opk you only need dtd once so fingers crossed xxx

hp wow congrats is this your first if its ok with the other ladies would love to see scan pics when you get them xx


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> I tried to keep it from him as much as possible but there was a couple of times when I was so irritated when he told me he was tired that I just had to snap! I then used to tell him almost as soon as my period had finished that it was a good week! That seemed to work better as it took stress out of it being particular days.
> 
> And I so know what you mean about too many babies and too many pregnant people - it really does hurt I know and trying to sound like you are genuinely offering congratulations.
> 
> I have my fingers crossed for you all! I am quite nervous looking after my bean - it has been nearly ten weeks but I want to be able to relax!

I am so excited for you! It can't be long til your scan now, good luck for it x I would love to see your scan picture. I think things are improving for me and OH, still not 100% success rate in DTD successfully, but not 0% and better than last month! Your advice about telling him when was a good week seems to have help, to be honest tho, he asked me to tell him which was weird, without me having to suggest it!


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> Hi viccat welcome to our thread,least when you opk you only need dtd once so fingers crossed xxx
> 
> hp wow congrats is this your first if its ok with the other ladies would love to see scan pics when you get them xx

I am less glum, actually feel quite good at the moment. I would also love to see HP's scan pic. 

I do wonder about DTD once, as does 'old' sperm not work very well in getting to the egg?


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## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> I hope you don't mind me popping up on this thread. It is a thread I keep coming back to - not because OH has performance anxiety as such, but we only DTD a couple of times a month. It's just the way he is, and to be honest I'm happy with that for 3 weeks every month :shy:
> 
> This is month 4, and I reckon there was only last month that we were anywhere near DTD at the right date. I think one month we didn't DTD at all - does that even count as TTC? :(
> 
> So..... I've got a CBFM, and started using it this month. CD8 but only got the next couple of weekends as my beloved is away for the next couple of weeks. Fingers crossed for this weekend, that the timing is right, and he's not too tired.
> 
> Glad to join you all on this admittedly difficult journey. :flower:

Hi Viccat, everyone is welcome! It's mad that something which used to be such fun (DTD) suddenly turns into hard work! Let us know how you get on with your CBFM. I am going to have a bash with OPKs next month.


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## kelly1973

they say sperm can last up to 5 days but fresh is best im 1 dpo i think had a good bedding this time so fingers crossed, im glad its helped with telling oh and you should def do opks then you can get it down to two days and give you the best poss chance xxx


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> they say sperm can last up to 5 days but fresh is best im 1 dpo i think had a good bedding this time so fingers crossed, im glad its helped with telling oh and you should def do opks then you can get it down to two days and give you the best poss chance xxx

Thanks Kelly!

We DTD CD10 and CD14 successfully this month. CD17 today, still lots of EWCM, no chance of DTD this weekend so I guess I have done everything I can! EWCM is usually gone by CD18.

I don't know if you can get EWCM the day(s) after ovulation or not, but I guess the OPKs will give me a better insight.

Sounds like you had a good bash at it this month, I am crossing all of my fingers for you. Thanks for all your support x


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## kelly1973

usually they say it drys up once ov has happened you should join ff its free for a month and really helped me teaches you about the signs glad things are getting better for you xxx


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## viccat

Well some frustration this weekend. I think OH has grasped the idea of needing to BD more ..... but I'm not sure he is aware of the every couple of days idea. Plus by not really discussing things, he has no idea of my cycle. :shrug:

This weekend we BD on Friday (which has been a couple of weeks, so not the newest swimmers!) then he was up for it again Saturday but we had an ooops so we'll class that as a "just for fun" session ;) Then Sunday I got my peak, but OH was very stressed packing to leave again, and I didn't dare suggest a quicky.

He's gone now for a week :(

I guess the frustration is partly happening because I got the CBFM. Previously I would have been more relaxed, so knowing this was my best weekend is a double-edged sword. Feeling more knowledgeable and in control is good. After looking at some piccies online, I can pretty much read the CBFM sticks like an OPK and was expecting the peak. On the upside, there's comfort to be gained from the idea my hormones are doing what they should! :thumbup:

Sarahjewel, on the EWCM question, I only get it for a couple of days, and if this month is representative it happens just before OV.


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## kelly1973

sure does and usually dries up when ov happens xxx


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## kelly1973

Fingers crossed viccat xx


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## Seity

Good luck. I saw someone asked about EWCM after OV. I track my cycle and use opks. I get EWCM for at least 5 days before OV. I always get two days of + opk's. I OV sometime soon after the 2nd + opk (within ~12 hours). My cervix is wide open late the day of the 2nd + and almost, but not completely closed the day after (3rd day). I get a very - opk the 3rd day. I always have EWCM the day after OV, but nothing like the quantity I have the day of OV. The 2nd day after OV I've dried up. This is what is typical for my cycle.


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## kelly1973

hi seity dare i ask how you find your cervix is it hard to find or am i just being dim


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## Seity

Well you pretty much stick your finger in and feel around. When it's getting near OV my cervix is actually super high and I have to bear down a little to even reach it. After OV, during the luteal phase it's a bit lower, but still up there. I generally check in the shower, so I know everything is clean. I put one leg up on the edge of the tub and use my middle finger (because its longest and can reach higher). Once I feel the bump, I feel for the dimple that's the opening. Getting a feel for open vs closed can take a while. It's been easier to tell since having my son. LOL Hope that's not too much TMI.


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## kelly1973

lol nothings tmi on this site ok so how can you tell its open


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## Seity

When it's open, I can actually fit the tip of my finger in just a bit. When it's closed, I can only feel the dimple where the opening is and it feels all tightly closed. Sometimes it's open just a little and those days it's tricky to decide if it's open or just partially open. Closed is generally pretty obvious. It really is one of those thing you have to get a feel for by doing. I generally only bother checking right around when I expect OV to help narrow down the exact day, but I've found the opks to be very accurate for me and so don't really need to check anymore unless I want secondary confirmation.

Turns out this month I didn't get my normal signs (abundant EWCM for days in advance) and we DTD Friday night because normally I'd expect to OV tomorrow and it'd be a safe day, but opk and cervix confirmed I OV'd two days early! aka yesterday, so now I'm in the two week wait. :dohh: Ah well, if it's meant to be, than so be it. Last time we managed to DTD was 2 months ago.


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## kelly1973

fingers crossed seity this is your month, do you have troubles like us ladies every month?

Hey sara where are you hope your ok xxx


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## Seity

I'm supposedly in the one and done club. We don't actually want any more. My OH has always had problems, so it's a bit of a waste to be on birth control. Once every 2 months is the norm. I track my cycles to try and decide if I should use the diaphragm or not, but this cycle tricked me into thinking things were safe and then my body decided to OV early. We've discussed that accidental pregnancy was a possibility of this method, so if it happens we'll manage. It's just not the preferred outcome.


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## kelly1973

so do you want more little ones your pics are perfect


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## Seity

Well, ready or not, the test came out positive.


----------



## HPMINI

as promised

It's real! Not a food baby after all! Congrats Seity and I have my fingers crossed for you all!! You can do it!!!


----------



## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> fingers crossed seity this is your month, do you have troubles like us ladies every month?
> 
> Hey sara where are you hope your ok xxx

Yes, Sara, whats the latest? And how are you doing Kelly? I had a visit from AF this week so onto June now. May was a bit of a long shot anyway as I was away with work for the first half of my window... Everything I listened to today seemed to be baby related... :haha::wacko:


----------



## greenjelly

HPMINI said:


> View attachment 410877
> 
> 
> as promised
> 
> It's real! Not a food baby after all! Congrats Seity and I have my fingers crossed for you all!! You can do it!!!

Congrats HP Mini and Seity. Keep healthy :hugs:


----------



## HPMINI

Oh greenjelly - keep the faith - it will be your turn - probably when you least expect it!! 

I know exactly how you feel -when you really want a baby- the whole world seems to have one or expecting one or talking about them!!! 

And then to top it all last year my sister fell pregnant and I had to be happy for her!


----------



## greenjelly

HPMINI said:


> Oh greenjelly - keep the faith - it will be your turn - probably when you least expect it!!
> 
> I know exactly how you feel -when you really want a baby- the whole world seems to have one or expecting one or talking about them!!!
> 
> And then to top it all last year my sister fell pregnant and I had to be happy for her!

Thanks HP! I cant imagine what it would be like to not have :witch: for month after month! Could you believe it when she didnt arrive? How far gone are you?


----------



## HPMINI

I am 12w + 4 now! I could not believe it when AF didn't arrive and I actually managed to convince myself that because I'd had a holiday and flown overseas that that had messed up my cycle. It took a week for me to test though - personally I prefer to do that than the day of the missed period. Despite the fact I was feeling unwell and had had the horrid metallic taste in the mouth. Very bizarre when comparing symptoms!

I am looking forward to a few months without AF!


----------



## Seity

Congrats HPMINI!


----------



## greenjelly

Wow, so even through the tricky first 12 weeks. Thats excellent. They say about the metallic taste. I had that once but was due to me having eaten dodgy pine nuts apparently. It wasnt a fun experience! Did you have any other symptoms that made you think you might be PG before you tested? Im always expecting my boobs to triple in size as a clue that I might be PG. Is this your first baby?


----------



## Seity

My only symptom the first time around was a vivid dream of a BFP at 13dpo. Tested and the dream was true. Crazy because I'd tested at 11 dpo and got a - so I thought I was out that month. 
Same thing this time around only I got the dream at 11dpo, but it still proved true.
The dreams are so powerful that after you wake up you think it was real for a while before it sinks in you were asleep.


----------



## HPMINI

Mind you - a few days ago - I woke up thinking "I wish I was pregnant" and then I remembered. 

I suppose my earliest signs were the metallic taste, feeling under the weather, and also the missed period. The signs all began about five days after my missed period. Can't remember whether the boobs hurt dramatical now! I was also a bit confused by the CBFM which showed me at high fertility from my normal ovulation time to about day 26 when it showed me I was at peak! I think that gave me an idea too.

So I have to admit although I was overjoyed about the positive test, it wasn't a surprise as I had an inkling!


----------



## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> View attachment 410877
> 
> 
> as promised
> 
> It's real! Not a food baby after all! Congrats Seity and I have my fingers crossed for you all!! You can do it!!!

HPMINI, loving your non-food baby pic!!!!!! You must have been over the moon when you saw it!

Green Jelly, Kelly, I am fine, just been a bit hectic recently plus computer problems! Just started AF yesterday, so back to the start again I reckon!

God, this is exhausting! :wacko:

How is everyone?


----------



## kelly1973

hi sara me too af here commence the roller coaster you doing opk this month??

congrats seity wahoo 

hpm love the pics you must be so happy xxx

green hey how are you,


----------



## HPMINI

Kelly - I am really happy! But, I know what a difficult job it was to get here!! So I know how lucky I am. I was pretty sure it wasn't going to happen. What with missed months of opportunity etc.

Actually I don't know if you use preseed but I just saw the email where my purchase confirmation came through and that was in October. So we probably didn't start using it until November. I don't know how many times we dtd at the right time (I don't keep a diary!) but considering I conceived in March, I was only using it for five months before getting a result!


----------



## kelly1973

ive tried it twice ive just bought concieve plus thought id give that a go i have bout 8 days to ov and yet again im dreading it, im so pleased for you as i really know how hard it is xxxxxxxxxx


----------



## greenjelly

SaraJewel said:


> HPMINI said:
> 
> 
> 
> View attachment 410877
> 
> 
> as promised
> 
> It's real! Not a food baby after all! Congrats Seity and I have my fingers crossed for you all!! You can do it!!!
> 
> HPMINI, loving your non-food baby pic!!!!!! You must have been over the moon when you saw it!
> 
> Green Jelly, Kelly, I am fine, just been a bit hectic recently plus computer problems! Just started AF yesterday, so back to the start again I reckon!
> 
> God, this is exhausting! :wacko:
> 
> How is everyone?Click to expand...

Hey Sara. I had a period from hell last week - really heavy with leakage - like being a teenager again! (TMI? Sorry)
So we are all back on the job then? Here's to June BDing! I am in the process of buying a 3 bed house. Will be moving out of my one bed flat and I wonder if knowing we have more space will 'psychologically' be a boost?


----------



## SaraJewel

Hey Sara. I had a period from hell last week - really heavy with leakage - like being a teenager again! (TMI? Sorry)
So we are all back on the job then? Here's to June BDing! I am in the process of buying a 3 bed house. Will be moving out of my one bed flat and I wonder if knowing we have more space will 'psychologically' be a boost?[/QUOTE]

Yes, I am in the middle of the same! Super heavy and sore........ Don't worry about TMI, I am generally not shocked!

Yep we are back on the job.......... 

How exciting about your new house! Good luck with filling the spare room!


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> hi sara me too af here commence the roller coaster you doing opk this month??
> 
> congrats seity wahoo
> 
> hpm love the pics you must be so happy xxx
> 
> green hey how are you,


Hi Kelly, yep, gonna give OPKs a go this month. Think I know when I am ovulating from EWCM, but would be good to confirm things!

Mind you, had a practice run last month, found POAS impossible! Don't think I have a steady stream (TMI???) so it went all over the stick!!! I am sure practice will make perfect tho....


----------



## HPMINI

I always peed in a cup and dipped the stick in - found it so much easier than catching the flow!!


----------



## kelly1973

me too i saved the top of the ear bud box lol and peed in that mind you i still piss on my fingers lmao.

green good lucj with new place im moving to new farm on 1st july i sell and breed poultry as a living so its guna be a living nitemare to move all the stock oh super randy at the moment just hoping it stays that way when ov is here


----------



## HPMINI

I used to panic that if I didn't catch any midstream I wouldn't have any to test and that would be a waste of time!!


----------



## kelly1973

lol im a confessed poas addict lol


----------



## HPMINI

I became a POAS addict with the CBFM but not with HPTs!


----------



## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> me too i saved the top of the ear bud box lol and peed in that mind you i still piss on my fingers lmao.
> 
> green good lucj with new place im moving to new farm on 1st july i sell and breed poultry as a living so its guna be a living nitemare to move all the stock oh super randy at the moment just hoping it stays that way when ov is here

Thanks Kelly. Fingers crossed the sale goes through ok. new farm? Sounds exciting. how many chickens to move? 
I too pee into a pot and dip. Do we need a need abbreviation for that? PIAP rather than POAS? 
Im on day 8 so I guess I should be getting back on the sticks... oh the boredom of it....


----------



## kelly1973

lol green agreed boredom lol piap it is.
Yeah heres my website www.cannychicken.co.uk i have well over 100 hens i love my job hard work but was born to work outside.

afm day 4 so usually ov day 11 so happens ov takes place beddind went so well and i never got temp rise bloody typical im trying not to stress but everytime i think about it i feel sick wat a bloody nite mare


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> me too i saved the top of the ear bud box lol and peed in that mind you i still piss on my fingers lmao.
> 
> green good lucj with new place im moving to new farm on 1st july i sell and breed poultry as a living so its guna be a living nitemare to move all the stock oh super randy at the moment just hoping it stays that way when ov is here


Sounds like he's getting over performance problems?? Hope it carries on for you :winkwink:


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> lol green agreed boredom lol piap it is.
> Yeah heres my website www.cannychicken.co.uk i have well over 100 hens i love my job hard work but was born to work outside.
> 
> afm day 4 so usually ov day 11 so happens ov takes place beddind went so well and i never got temp rise bloody typical im trying not to stress but everytime i think about it i feel sick wat a bloody nite mare

I am day 4 too Kelly, but don't ovulate (I think!) til later in the month. Hopefully will know more this month when I PIAP :haha:

I am sitting thinking about it, but this should be the least stressful time shouldn't it??? Don't have to worry about DTD at the moment, about OPKs or about being in the wait and worrying whether we've done enough!!!


----------



## kelly1973

yeah it should be but its all i do is think about it, am pleased your guna do opks this month that way you have the best poss chance things have been good this end bedding wise just pray it carries on ive bought some concieve plus too to give the swimmers an easy ride lol how are you lovely ladies


----------



## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> yeah it should be but its all i do is think about it, am pleased your guna do opks this month that way you have the best poss chance things have been good this end bedding wise just pray it carries on ive bought some concieve plus too to give the swimmers an easy ride lol how are you lovely ladies

What is Conceive Plus then? Is it a tablet? Does it have to be prescribed by a GP? 
Do you ladies do the hips raising thing after BDing? Do you think it makes a difference? 
Im very well thank you. Got the week off work and it's lovely! :happydance:


----------



## HPMINI

I always made sure I stayed laying down after sex for at least 20 minutes - usually just with my knees raised.
Isn't conceive plus just a lubricant?


----------



## HPMINI

Just googled it - it's a fertility lubricant - sperm friendly - can get it though amazon - maybe at the chemist too. Bit like preseed.

Definitely worth a go!


----------



## kelly1973

yep used preseed in past but been told concieve is better so im armed and ready i just make sure i dont get out of bed for a while think if i started putting legs in air oh would get a tad stressed lol how are you all today


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> yep used preseed in past but been told concieve is better so im armed and ready i just make sure i dont get out of bed for a while think if i started putting legs in air oh would get a tad stressed lol how are you all today

Hi Kelly,

I'm fine, much the same as yesterday, not much going on!

I think it's fine just to stay lying down for a bit after DTD. Like HPMINI 20 mins or so is OK. I just put my knees up too, not much comes out that way.

Last month was best yet. Only one DTD without finishing. That is a record! I really hope things stay that way.............. I don't want to get my hopes up, but it does look like things are going in the right direction, but we shall see.


----------



## viccat

Loving PIAP!. I tried it, but it was even worse when that went wrong than when POAS goes wrong :dohh:



SaraJewel said:


> I think it's fine just to stay lying down for a bit after DTD. Like HPMINI 20 mins or so is OK. I just put my knees up too, not much comes out that way.
> 
> Last month was best yet. Only one DTD without finishing. That is a record! I really hope things stay that way.............. I don't want to get my hopes up, but it does look like things are going in the right direction, but we shall see.

Really pleased to hear things are picking up - I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you. I really think using the OPKs will help. I am so much more relaxed during the rest of the month when I know I don't have to stress about TTC. I think my mood helps my OH chill out too.

Oh I just do the knees up thing too - I think if I stuck my feet up on the end of the bed that would just be too much TTC for him! :blush:


----------



## kelly1973

so glad sara things are improving me too hun hopefully this is our month xxx

hi viccat how are you

ok ladies when you say you put your knees up are your feet on bed as i think oh would freak if i put them above my head lol


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> so glad sara things are improving me too hun hopefully this is our month xxx
> 
> hi viccat how are you
> 
> ok ladies when you say you put your knees up are your feet on bed as i think oh would freak if i put them above my head lol

Thanks Kelly,

yes, feet on bed!!!!


----------



## kelly1973

i had visions with me with legs in air and oh complaining he had no covers lol


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> i had visions with me with legs in air and oh complaining he had no covers lol

:haha:Although, I have to admit I have done it when OH has left the room! Just the once tho, and don't honestly think there is any benefit in it.

How's things going? We are CD 8 now aren't we?

I'm having quite a nice weekend, very relaxing and things going well, although aaaaaaages til I ovulate.


----------



## kelly1973

yep same here im starting to get nervous as starting to get colour on opk are you doing them now? if so which ones are you using get yourself a signature like mine so i can see where your at. no viagra this month so down to luck i guess


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> yep same here im starting to get nervous as starting to get colour on opk are you doing them now? if so which ones are you using get yourself a signature like mine so i can see where your at. no viagra this month so down to luck i guess

Yes, I started using them CD6, have Boots own brand, how bout you?

don't know how to do the signature, will have a look.........


----------



## kelly1973

use cheapies from internet till i get colour then boots own make not long now very nervous cant wait till the tww lol

go to ticker factory make your ticker up then copy the bb code go to your user cp up top scroll down to signature and paste bb code in to there and wala xxxx


----------



## SaraJewel

Do you stop doing them when you get a positive result, or do them all through your cycle?

Good luck!


----------



## kelly1973

i stop ok so just got a positive today tryed to dtd and failed totally upset will try again tonight how can we ever have a baby if we cant do it all the way


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> i stop ok so just got a positive today tryed to dtd and failed totally upset will try again tonight how can we ever have a baby if we cant do it all the way

Oh I'm really sorry, I always find that so soul destroying. But you still have tonight and probably tomorrow too so don't give up hope.

:hugs:

How is OH?


----------



## kelly1973

hes really bad hates letting me down and gone all depressed how the hell am i guna get him in the mood now hes confidence is knocked ive stopped going on another thread i post on cause gets me so down when they dtd loads and are saying not sure its enough,hows your opk doing any signs?


----------



## viccat

Sorry to hear that Kelly ((HUGS)) Fingers crossed over the next couple of days......

CD6 for me, and just started this cycle of POAS.


----------



## kelly1973

thanks viccat do you get the feelings of dread


----------



## viccat

Not this far ahead. As ov approaches I do start to get tense though - especially if OH is tired or ill. I just dread the "not tonight, can I have a rain check" response :(


----------



## kelly1973

does oh have the same probs as my oh if you dont mind me asking


----------



## viccat

No - except for one time 2 cycles ago. I was drawn to this thread because he has a low sex drive. Before TTC we weren't even DTD once a month.

I go through some of the same frustrations when I see people recommending SMEP or doing it every other day for the whole cycle. I would love to try that, but realistically it would introduce a whole element of pressure. Instead I got my CBFM and am giving it my best shot to try and DTD twice in the high/peak window. If I continue to struggle (I think I'm on cycle 4 or 5) we will need a heart to heart about how he needs to be more forthcoming when it is the right time.

I don't want to push too hard though, because we are TTC earlier than he perhaps would have wanted (i.e. before marriage). I had to explain that I wasn't getting any younger.....


----------



## kelly1973

how old are you


----------



## viccat

37 - will be 38 in September.

My mum had me when she was 36, so I was okay until then, but somehow once I got past that number it really hit me. :wacko:


----------



## kelly1973

me too im 39 so im really worried ive left it too late well dtd last night so thats brill just need to somehow do it again tonight
hell it took some doing last night cant wait for the tww so i aint gotta do it anymore lol


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Sorry to hear that Kelly ((HUGS)) Fingers crossed over the next couple of days......
> 
> CD6 for me, and just started this cycle of POAS.

Is this the first time you're using OPKs? This is first time for me, CD10 and no sign! Not surprised tho, cos suspect I ovulate later on.

Kelly, it's going fine, I am not sure if the line is getting darker or not or if I am imagining it. It is visible but very light. I am starting to worry it will not get darker at all and I'll discover I'm not ovulating :nope:


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> me too im 39 so im really worried ive left it too late well dtd last night so thats brill just need to somehow do it again tonight
> hell it took some doing last night cant wait for the tww so i aint gotta do it anymore lol

:thumbup:Glad you had a successful attempt!!!! We started this month well, but of course, nowhere near ovulation time! 

You sounded so sad yesterday, I know exactly how it feels, have been there loads of times over the past 9 months..............


----------



## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> Is this the first time you're using OPKs? This is first time for me, CD10 and no sign! Not surprised tho, cos suspect I ovulate later on.
> 
> Kelly, it's going fine, I am not sure if the line is getting darker or not or if I am imagining it. It is visible but very light. I am starting to worry it will not get darker at all and I'll discover I'm not ovulating :nope:

I use the CBFM, but I guess the sticks are similar as OPKs. I had first cycle using it last month, this is my second. If I am correct you should have one dark line early in your cycle, then as ovulation is about to happen it fades away and a second line shows up when you ovulate. The first line then gets stronger again and the second vanishes.

I'm not exactly the most experienced person around here though :shrug: so it would be worth checking against other folks photos. There's loads around :)

I also keep my old sticks and mark day and CBFM result on them. I know I should trust the monitor, but I'm a control freak :winkwink: They are definitely easier to "read" when you can compare them to eachother.


----------



## kelly1973

you get the control line and with alot of people they is always a very light line every single day remenber not to use fmu it will get darker sara for sure try not to worry this is strange for me to be this early lots of ladies on another thread dont ov till day 19, 20 get some pics and post on here we can help you tell if there positive or not

afm was very sad yesterday but must remenber not to let it get me down as if oh sees that he wont be able to dtd at all as he feels pressure us ladies have to be so strong sometimes hugs to you makes me feel better talking to you guys as know you understand


----------



## viccat

viccat said:


> I use the CBFM, but I guess the sticks are similar as OPKs. I had first cycle using it last month, this is my second. If I am correct you should have one dark line early in your cycle, then as ovulation is about to happen it fades away and a second line shows up when you ovulate. The first line then gets stronger again and the second vanishes.

Nope, I wasn't correct, LOL. I've been looking at piccies and OPKs do work a little differently to CBFM. Please ignore me! :dohh:


----------



## kelly1973

i wouldnt have a clue how to use a cbfm are they easy to use


----------



## viccat

Yep, I would say it is easy to use - you press a button when it is CD1, and then the monitor tells you which days to POAS and reads the sticks for you. It doesn't have a control line, but measures both estrogen and LH - hence the two lines.


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> viccat said:
> 
> 
> I use the CBFM, but I guess the sticks are similar as OPKs. I had first cycle using it last month, this is my second. If I am correct you should have one dark line early in your cycle, then as ovulation is about to happen it fades away and a second line shows up when you ovulate. The first line then gets stronger again and the second vanishes.
> 
> Nope, I wasn't correct, LOL. I've been looking at piccies and OPKs do work a little differently to CBFM. Please ignore me! :dohh:Click to expand...

Hey don't worry, it's OK!!! I figured they worked differently from your post above! Where are you in your cycle?


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> you get the control line and with alot of people they is always a very light line every single day remenber not to use fmu it will get darker sara for sure try not to worry this is strange for me to be this early lots of ladies on another thread dont ov till day 19, 20 get some pics and post on here we can help you tell if there positive or not
> 
> afm was very sad yesterday but must remenber not to let it get me down as if oh sees that he wont be able to dtd at all as he feels pressure us ladies have to be so strong sometimes hugs to you makes me feel better talking to you guys as know you understand

Thanks Kelly, that makes me feel better. I am shortly entering what is usually my more fertile phase (usually when EWCM starts) and am starting to feel nervous. Not having a positive OPK test is making me feel less anxious about it tho so that is good. I've not been using FMU as the kits said better not to. The only time I can really test during the week is about 5pm, so have been doing that. Gonna go for early afternoon at the weekend tho as heard that is better.

Yes, we have to be strong, being down in the dumps or getting upset in front of OH in my experience just makes things much worse. It makes me feel better speaking to you girls too. We will get through this together! :hugs:


----------



## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> Hey don't worry, it's OK!!! I figured they worked differently from your post above! Where are you in your cycle?

CD8 today and CBFM is telling me "high" so I guess my cycle will be similar to last month and I am due to Ov on CD12.

I know what you mean about not getting upset - it's also why I deliberately set out to DTD "just for fun" at least once a month. So far we've not done anything this month, and I know I need at least one BD before Ov otherwise they will be stale old rubbish swimmers! :nope:


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> Hey don't worry, it's OK!!! I figured they worked differently from your post above! Where are you in your cycle?
> 
> CD8 today and CBFM is telling me "high" so I guess my cycle will be similar to last month and I am due to Ov on CD12.
> 
> I know what you mean about not getting upset - it's also why I deliberately set out to DTD "just for fun" at least once a month. So far we've not done anything this month, and I know I need at least one BD before Ov otherwise they will be stale old rubbish swimmers! :nope:Click to expand...

Yes I try to do that too, to keep things fun and fresh too! I am CD11, we had a "fun" session a few days ago, felt more normal than it has in a while. I usually have to instigate it tho as OH's drive isn't what it used to be. I think a lot of men in their early 40s feel like that, whereas we are still raring to go and have the baby incentive too! I think I usually ovulate around CD17-18, but have just been judging this on EWCM which a get up to 5 days before hand (and actually last month it was 6 days!). That's why I got the OPK, to try and find out what's happening. I've heard that it's easy to miss the surge of LH tho so not sure if it will be worth it or not. 

Anyway, no sign of LH surge yet but really think is early days. 

Good luck with your "fun" DTD and for "business" DTD too! Hope it works out :hugs:


----------



## kelly1973

sara when you start to get a pink line i usually do two a day one bout 11 then bout 9 and sometimes even 5 as sometimes if your like me you get a mega short surge and miss it once you have done a couple of cycles you will get to know when you ov

afm we dtd again last night so just praying i ov hopefully were all be in tww together at least we can chill
agreed on old swimmers get those buggers out the way hugs to you all x


----------



## Seity

:rofl: At the stale old rubbish swimmers. I'm proof positive that is nonsense.
I used the cheapest opks I could buy on ebay and tested at 5pm. If you are worried about missing the surge, you can do two a day once they start to get darker.


----------



## kelly1973

i do three a day when start to get line and my opks are the cheapest paper ones on line ill send you a link if you like xxx


----------



## SaraJewel

Seity said:


> :rofl: At the stale old rubbish swimmers. I'm proof positive that is nonsense.
> I used the cheapest opks I could buy on ebay and tested at 5pm. If you are worried about missing the surge, you can do two a day once they start to get darker.

Maybe the swimmers weren't stale? Don't want to offend but does OH, ahem, refresh them himself?

If I did 2 per day, the 2nd would be first thing in the morning and have read that this is bad time to do it.


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> i do three a day when start to get line and my opks are the cheapest paper ones on line ill send you a link if you like xxx

Aww that's sweet, thank you but don't know when I would be able to do them. Not possible at work really. I'll see how I go this month.

sounds like you had a good go at it this month, let's keep each other company in the TWW again (if I ever get there!!!!)


----------



## viccat

Seity said:


> :rofl: At the stale old rubbish swimmers. I'm proof positive that is nonsense.

That is good to hear. :thumbup:


----------



## Seity

I know he wasn't doing any self satisfying, so his swimmers were 100% 2 months since last release. :haha: Sperm are constantly being created and reabsorbed.
Don't use FMU for opk, it'll mess with the results. If you could do 10am or noon, for your 1st test, that'd be better.


----------



## kelly1973

i agree with seity i do mine bout 11 def tww for sure its guna be a good month xxx


----------



## kelly1973

yah look at my chart ladies im in the tww and my chart is giving me good for dtd timing wahoo i can relax now im waiting for you ladies come join me in tww xx


----------



## kelly1973

rephrase that it says high wahoo


----------



## viccat

kelly1973 said:


> yah look at my chart ladies im in the tww and my chart is giving me good for dtd timing wahoo i can relax now im waiting for you ladies come join me in tww xx

Looking good! I should be in my tww next Tues - wish me luck for this weekend ;)


----------



## Seity

:dust: to you all. I hope to see you in 1st tri soon!


----------



## kelly1973

good luck viccat xx

thanks seity


----------



## SaraJewel

Thanks everyone and good luck! I will try earlier testing over the weekend, but after that it's 5pm or nothing!!!


----------



## HPMINI

I have to admit, I can't remember how many times we dtd in March but I seem to remember thinking it wasn't enough at the right time - but it obviously was! 

I think sometimes we get a bit carried away with the idea of the two day window but I reckon if you concentrate on starting almost as soon as your period has finished and for your OH's benefit call it a good week - then it will stand you in good stead! 

Good luck all - and it really is possible!! I know I got to the stage when I wondered whether I need to call the gp for testing but didn't get around to it. Fingers crossed!


----------



## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> I have to admit, I can't remember how many times we dtd in March but I seem to remember thinking it wasn't enough at the right time - but it obviously was!
> 
> I think sometimes we get a bit carried away with the idea of the two day window but I reckon if you concentrate on starting almost as soon as your period has finished and for your OH's benefit call it a good week - then it will stand you in good stead!
> 
> Good luck all - and it really is possible!! I know I got to the stage when I wondered whether I need to call the gp for testing but didn't get around to it. Fingers crossed!

Thanks you :flower:

I think you are absolutely right. You do not have to DTD in the 2 day window to get pregnant, although it can increase chances. Also, if you just focus on the 2 day window, it all gets a bit clinical and what about having sex just for fun?! I think it's important to carry on with that and remember that it's for pleasure too!

Your approach has actually really helped, although I don't ovulate in the first week after period stops, but in the second week. OH asked to know when was a good time to DTD so he is prepared for more BD-ing, so I tell him when the 2nd week is coming up so he can be more focused. We started this last month so quite new approach, we will see how it goes, doesn't seem to be adding to any performance anxiety which is getting better!

Ideally, we should be DTD every 2 days throughout cycle but how realistic is that??!! (not very!).

Good to hear from you. Your story has given me hope! Hope you are feeling well?


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> rephrase that it says high wahoo

Nice one! Looks like things worked out better than you thought they would with DTD! :thumbup:


----------



## kelly1973

it did xxxx i agree us ladies just have to do it as much as we can 


hp how are you


----------



## HPMINI

I'm good thanks. I know how lucky I am - and I am trying to be really careful with foods that are on the list to avoid. Generally just being careful.

According to the sonographer's dates, I will be 15 weeks on Tuesday. Had a midwife appointment on Friday and she managed to find the heart beat - chuffed!!! Did sound a bit like a steam train!

Slowly getting out of the being tired phase (I believe that's shortlived though). Trying to find some aqua aerobic classes for a bit of exercise.

I am amazed that although I have felt nauseous and had sore boobs (still have!) that I have not been sick - yay

Starting to have a clothing crisis and really need a basic maternity wardrobe. My tum is looking more and more rounded.

I am sure you will all experience this soon! And it will be worth the wait!


----------



## kelly1973

hope so hp over the moon for you forgive me if ive asked before but did you have same problems as us gguys as gives me hope knowing it can happen xx


----------



## HPMINI

I certainly did have the same problem. Whenever it was the right time, he either seemed to have performance anxiety or was too tired and we either didn't start or we would have to give up. Not easy when you are both on shift work. So yes it can happen!!

It always seemed to happen at the optimum time!! 

Have to be honest, I don't keep a diary on these matters, but I am not sure how many times we had sex in March in order to conceive. I am absolutely sure it wasn't that many times.

The waiting is a killer - I know! I can really sympathise with you all because I have been there thinking it would never happen.


----------



## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> I certainly did have the same problem. Whenever it was the right time, he either seemed to have performance anxiety or was too tired and we either didn't start or we would have to give up. Not easy when you are both on shift work. So yes it can happen!!
> 
> It always seemed to happen at the optimum time!!
> 
> Have to be honest, I don't keep a diary on these matters, but I am not sure how many times we had sex in March in order to conceive. I am absolutely sure it wasn't that many times.
> 
> The waiting is a killer - I know! I can really sympathise with you all because I have been there thinking it would never happen.

Am am thrilled for you too. I know you understand how it feels for us gals!

Feeling fed up. CD16, fertile signs (EWCM), OPK negative and OH in a mood. Have said we should try and DTD every 2 days but this isn't looking very likely for tonight. Our timing is rubbish.


----------



## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> Feeling fed up. CD16, fertile signs (EWCM), OPK negative and OH in a mood. Have said we should try and DTD every 2 days but this isn't looking very likely for tonight. Our timing is rubbish.

Sorry to hear that SJ, and I'll keep my fingers crossed you can charm him into submission :winkwink:

Yesterday was my anticipated OV day, but OH declared himself too tired which was anticipated but still disappointing. However today I clearly got my LH surge and the CBFM monitor says "just do it". Fingers crossed for this evening - might need to get out the fail-safe sexy nighty :haha:


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> Feeling fed up. CD16, fertile signs (EWCM), OPK negative and OH in a mood. Have said we should try and DTD every 2 days but this isn't looking very likely for tonight. Our timing is rubbish.
> 
> Sorry to hear that SJ, and I'll keep my fingers crossed you can charm him into submission :winkwink:
> 
> Yesterday was my anticipated OV day, but OH declared himself too tired which was anticipated but still disappointing. However today I clearly got my LH surge and the CBFM monitor says "just do it". Fingers crossed for this evening - might need to get out the fail-safe sexy nighty :haha:Click to expand...

:haha:re the failsafe sexy nighty! 

I think we are on for tonight now too, so fingers crossed for us both!

Does it really say "just do it"!?


----------



## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> Does it really say "just do it"!?

LOL, no, but it does show a little egg symbol :D


----------



## kelly1973

thanks hp really gives us hope xxx

good luck ladies on the bedding hurry up im lonely on this tww xx


----------



## viccat

Feeling really despondent today. OH came home feeling unwell and panicking that he had throat cancer, so even the fail-safe sexy nighty failed :nope:

I just felt like shouting at him "do you actually want a child or not?!" which made me feel so selfish when he was worried. Especially when he cuddles up and apologises and asks if I still love him. I am trying to stay calm and wait to have a proper conversation later in the month.

Then I was up through the night ill with food poisoning so it wasn't a good evening at all. :sad1: I wish I was still asleep!


----------



## kelly1973

ah hell poor you viccat how are you feeling now? when are you due to ov?


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Feeling really despondent today. OH came home feeling unwell and panicking that he had throat cancer, so even the fail-safe sexy nighty failed :nope:
> 
> I just felt like shouting at him "do you actually want a child or not?!" which made me feel so selfish when he was worried. Especially when he cuddles up and apologises and asks if I still love him. I am trying to stay calm and wait to have a proper conversation later in the month.
> 
> Then I was up through the night ill with food poisoning so it wasn't a good evening at all. :sad1: I wish I was still asleep!

Our night doesn't seem as bad now! We DTD but were not successful in finishing. OH was in a shitty mood and annoying me anyway. Really fed up of it all. Having a night off tonight.

On the plus side, OPK got darker today, but not all the way yet! Maybe there is still time this month.............

God that sounds quite traumatic! Has he gone to see his GP?


----------



## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> Our night doesn't seem as bad now! We DTD but were not successful in finishing. OH was in a shitty mood and annoying me anyway. Really fed up of it all. Having a night off tonight.
> 
> On the plus side, OPK got darker today, but not all the way yet! Maybe there is still time this month.............
> 
> God that sounds quite traumatic! Has he gone to see his GP?

Thanks girls.

Sorry to hear that the finishing fairy didn't visit SJ. Shitty moods are not conducive are they? Fingers crossed for the rest of the month, anyways.

Yep, he saw his GP earlier in the year and has just started seeing a voice therapist as they diagnosed damaged vocal chords. The ongoing worry is coming from the fact his dad has been treated for throat cancer this year. OH knows that, but it doesn't stop him worrying that they might have got his own diagnosis wrong :nope:


----------



## kelly1973

hope oh is ok viccat xxx

sara when you get a plus opk they say dtd that day and the next so loads of time bad moods are not good for rumpey pumpey lol


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> hope oh is ok viccat xxx
> 
> sara when you get a plus opk they say dtd that day and the next so loads of time bad moods are not good for rumpey pumpey lol

Yep, hopefully get a plus tomorrow, really did get darker today, so hopefully lots of time left. Don't want to get my hopes up, you know what I mean. Might be a bit longer til the TWW for me. I am not sure if am CD16 or CD17 as period was a bit weird last month.

Viccat, that is really tough. I think it's normal to worry about your own health when your nearest and dearest has had a bad diagnosis. I hope you can get through it together :hugs:


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> thanks hp really gives us hope xxx
> 
> good luck ladies on the bedding hurry up im lonely on this tww xx

Hi Kelly.

Think am in the TWW now, but probably not much to wait for! I think I know I am out this month due to timing.

OPK very faint today, so think yesterday was the surge day and maybe just didn't catch it at right time. Was about 75% darkness of control line. Now have zero EWCM so reckon have ovulated. What do you think?

We should DTD tonight but OH is not well, how typical is that?

Last DTD on CD14 which I think is too long ago for us to be in with a chance, so guess will need to wait til next month :nope:

How are you? And you Viccat, how's things?


----------



## kelly1973

they say if you get a plus you need to dtd on that day and two days after for best chance cant you tempt him tonite bloody men drive you mad dont they see what this is doing to us


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> they say if you get a plus you need to dtd on that day and two days after for best chance cant you tempt him tonite bloody men drive you mad dont they see what this is doing to us

Yes I could and I did! Job well done last night, just got to wait it out now!


----------



## HPMINI

Excellent - it's got to work sometime!!! 

Fingers crossed for you!


----------



## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> Excellent - it's got to work sometime!!!
> 
> Fingers crossed for you!

Thanks! Driving myself crazy wondering if I did it too late if had already ovulated, or if did it at the right time just before ovulating!

Only time will tell.........................

I need to chill out!


----------



## kelly1973

yeh excellent bedding sara fingers crossed only takes once xx we are now tww buddies xx


----------



## viccat

Woohoo!! Good news SJ!

I am in the tww with you now. I think I'm just waiting for AF though - we have DTD once (yes, once!) this month. I think it was about 2 days before ovulation, so is a bit of a long shot.

Fingers crossed, and time for a nice cup of tea... :coffee:

The only positive I can see in all this, is that while I've got this to focus on, I'm not worrying too much about fertility problems. I'm fairly convinced that if I get the timing right I'll get my BFP. There's got to be an upside, right? :wacko:


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Woohoo!! Good news SJ!
> 
> I am in the tww with you now. I think I'm just waiting for AF though - we have DTD once (yes, once!) this month. I think it was about 2 days before ovulation, so is a bit of a long shot.
> 
> Fingers crossed, and time for a nice cup of tea... :coffee:
> 
> The only positive I can see in all this, is that while I've got this to focus on, I'm not worrying too much about fertility problems. I'm fairly convinced that if I get the timing right I'll get my BFP. There's got to be an upside, right? :wacko:

Right! We have to think positive, and BTW, 2 days before ovulation is great timing! 

Let's ride the TWW out together Viccat and Kelly.

GreenJelly, where are you? Hope all is OK?


----------



## kelly1973

at last ladies we can relax viccat those little swimmers can last a few days so fingers crossed and anyway ladies we dtd who cares how many times wahoo i was meant to test today but have no tests not sure its worth it i dont feel pregnant


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> at last ladies we can relax viccat those little swimmers can last a few days so fingers crossed and anyway ladies we dtd who cares how many times wahoo i was meant to test today but have no tests not sure its worth it i dont feel pregnant

I don't know what pregnant feels like!

Is AF due soon?

I am gonna try Clearblue digital next month OPKs to see if they pick up surge better. I've e-mailed the professionals about when is best to test as I'm not sure testing after work is best for me as urine v pale and find it hard to restrict fluid in the afternoon.

Interestingly, my friend was told by her fertility clinic to take urine samples from FMU for them to test for ovulation. So gonna see what the Doc at clearblue thinks. Will let you know.


----------



## HPMINI

I am sure my Clearblue kit wanted FMU.

I have to say I am not sure I felt pregnant. I suppose AF was due on the Friday/Saturday but it wasn't until the following wednesday that I felt a little under the weather, not incredibly bad though. Enough to make me not turn up to a blood donor session. They always ask if you could be pregnant but having missed a period I couldn't be sure. On the Thursday I had the metallic taste. Friday night, a week after AF was due was when I felt rough.


----------



## kelly1973

sara let us know what they say xx#
hp that gives me hope when i was pregnant my boobs were so sore i am exhausted at the min but was blaming that on my move i dont want to get my hopes up but i do have sore nips sara af due on wed mite test this weekend hell i haye this just wana be pregnant ladies we will get our stickys soon we wont be long hp hang on and were catch up x


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> sara let us know what they say xx#
> hp that gives me hope when i was pregnant my boobs were so sore i am exhausted at the min but was blaming that on my move i dont want to get my hopes up but i do have sore nips sara af due on wed mite test this weekend hell i haye this just wana be pregnant ladies we will get our stickys soon we wont be long hp hang on and were catch up x


Let me know how you go Kelly, your timing this month looked spot on!

Realistically I think we were too early and too late in our timing, with 2 failed attempts in between which would have been perfect timing, but can't be sure and I know we tried our best :winkwink: AND as you said Kelly, at least we are actually having successful attempts! If I think back to the 1st 7 months TTC, we only finished ONCE in 7 months. God, things are much better now! At least there is a chance.

I have given up looking at early signs of preg. Some months my BBs are v sore, some months they aren't, some months I feel twinges, some months I don't!!!!! I'm sure it's different for everyone, but I don't think most people feel any different until they are about 2 weeks preggers from reading posts on here. Symptoms of BFP are pretty similar to AF I think, which is why it is so frustrating doing symptom spotting! (having said that I still do wonder if they mean BFP rather than AF, every month but not as bad as I was!).

Good luck all!!!!! 

Hope you are still feeling well HP.

SJ x


----------



## viccat

I think you are correct on early pregnancy signs being pretty minimal. I was briefly pregnant a lot of years ago and didn't have any early symptoms other than missing AF (and I'm as regular as clockwork, so it was pretty obvious).

Then I started to feel nauseous, and completely went off coffee. :shrug:


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> sara let us know what they say xx#
> hp that gives me hope when i was pregnant my boobs were so sore i am exhausted at the min but was blaming that on my move i dont want to get my hopes up but i do have sore nips sara af due on wed mite test this weekend hell i haye this just wana be pregnant ladies we will get our stickys soon we wont be long hp hang on and were catch up x

Answer back from Clearblue Doctor about when to test using digital OPK (asked if better first thing or at 5pm):

Hello, I would say morning. The LH surge occurs at around the 14th or 16 th day or so after the first day of bleed of your last period. It isn't an exact timing thing. You do need concentrated urine as you say so having been asleep all night and then using the first urine in the morning should give you the best chance of accurately picking up your surge.

I did mention in the question that my 5pm urine was quite pale.

SJ x

SJ


----------



## kelly1973

hi ladies hope you are ok today,yesterday i tested and a very very very faint line came up so waited for fmu and sme happened and then poas but a different brand and a bfn felt like a smack in the face both were asda own make but the second kind was there value brand and the first a little more expensive shouldnt of got my hopes up but like a fool i did im 11 dpo now co should be getting lines on all tests now gutted :-(


----------



## viccat

Awwwww Kelly :hugs:

Not sure that you would get lines on all tests at 11dpo. I could be wrong, but I thought there were still a lot around that will only start picking up from AF date onwards?


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> hi ladies hope you are ok today,yesterday i tested and a very very very faint line came up so waited for fmu and sme happened and then poas but a different brand and a bfn felt like a smack in the face both were asda own make but the second kind was there value brand and the first a little more expensive shouldnt of got my hopes up but like a fool i did im 11 dpo now co should be getting lines on all tests now gutted :-(

Kelly, test again in a few days, not all brands are as sensitive as others and it's still early days in terms of getting a positive test. So did you do the first 2 tests with Asda brand? What was the other brand you tried?

You are definitely not a fool for getting your hopes up!!! We do it every month because it's what we want! 

AND it's defo not over until AF arrives! Manufacturers don't recommend testing until you miss AF because that's when you have the best chance of picking up a positive. Is it Weds that AF is due?

Thinking of you :hugs:


----------



## kelly1973

thanks ladies both were asdas brands ive taken them apart and theres a def line ill try post pic the one that didnt show a line was a cheaper own make it was 3.00 for two tests ive been so sad today as last night went to bed thinkin this was it do you really think that not all tests would be positive


----------



## HPMINI

kelly - I know it's easier said than done but try to wait for a few days after your period is due (a week if you can). I think (personally) sometimes testing before your due date could come up with a chemical pregnancy and you'd end up disappointed when AF arrives on time.

My first test was a real cheapie from the internet.

It's really hard waiting but every day after your period was due will lead you into a deeper suspicion and will be worth the wait.


----------



## kelly1973

thanks hp it does make sense im just so worried i wont get the chance to have a baby due to my age as im 39


----------



## Seity

I had a very negative test at 11dpo with my son. I hope you get your BFP kelly. 39 isn't old. I'm 39 next month. Plenty of ladies get pregnant after 40.


----------



## HPMINI

I'm 39 in five days time!


----------



## Seity

HPMINI said:


> I'm 39 in five days time!

I'm a month after you. I'm 30 July!


----------



## HPMINI

I don't act it though!


----------



## Seity

HPMINI said:


> I don't act it though!

Neither do I :rofl: Life's too short to act your age!


----------



## viccat

LOL - you lot are great.

Am I allowed a teensy bit of symptom spotting? Just had some spotting - I am 7DPO so fingers crossed for implantation... :thumbup:


----------



## kelly1973

viccat fingers crossed, i dont act it either lol i mite test again tomoz af due tomoz or wed boo


----------



## viccat

Any symptoms kelly? :flower:


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> viccat fingers crossed, i dont act it either lol i mite test again tomoz af due tomoz or wed boo

I think that IS a good symptom Viccat!

Have you tested again Kelly?


----------



## kelly1973

yep bfn for me ladies bak to that poxy drawing board thinking of getting doc appointment and just having a chat as really starting to get me down why do we have to go through this its just not fair


----------



## HPMINI

kelly - it was when I seriously started thinking that I needed to visit the doctor for a chat that I fell pregnant! I think that's called sod's law.

Actually a colleague said they were accepted for IVF and they were going to go to an appointment on a friday but the previous monday they discovered she was pregnant!

So maybe if you book an appointment your body will know that you mean business.

It will be good to chat it through anyway especially if it is getting you down.


----------



## kelly1973

thanks hp it is getting me down badly


----------



## viccat

Awww kelly, sorry to hear that hun. :hugs:

I certainly think going to the doctors would be a good idea - if nothing else you will get a chance to get it off your chest and get some professional feedback. It also helps to get the ball rolling - not sure about you, but I rarely get referred on a first visit!

You mentioned being 39 earlier - how are you feeling about turning 40, and what it means for TTC?


----------



## SaraJewel

Oh God turning 40 is too depressing!

Kelly, has AF arrived yet? I am so sorry you are feeling so down. It's so tough isn't it? It's so hard on our emotions. I was feeling rubbish yesterday. Go speak to your doc. They should be concerned about your emotional health too.

SJ x x x


----------



## kelly1973

cd1 here im worried bout turning 40 as i dont want to miss out on having a baby this will be my first if it ever happens i spent a long time in a violent relationship and finally a year and a half ago found the courage to get out and now with my partner really really want this funny how i can tell you ladies anything how are you all anyone any symptons come on we need a bfp xxx


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> cd1 here im worried bout turning 40 as i dont want to miss out on having a baby this will be my first if it ever happens i spent a long time in a violent relationship and finally a year and a half ago found the courage to get out and now with my partner really really want this funny how i can tell you ladies anything how are you all anyone any symptons come on we need a bfp xxx

Yep, I am worried too. Want it to happen soon, but it's so hard to know what's happening, I don't even know if I CAN get pregnant! 

I am soo happy for you you found your man and had the courage to leave the violent relationship. You poor thing it must've been horrible for you. Sometimes I console myself that although I'm not pregnant, at least I have a lovely man who loves and supports me and sounds like you do to....

I am OK, have been a bit despondent tho. OK, you know I'm not one for symptom spotting, so far I have sore BBs (not as sore as usual) and some twinges where I imagine ovaries would be. Also quite tired. But I usually have these symptoms before AF so not getting hopes up (well trying not to!) x


----------



## viccat

kelly1973 said:


> cd1 here im worried bout turning 40 as i dont want to miss out on having a baby this will be my first if it ever happens i spent a long time in a violent relationship and finally a year and a half ago found the courage to get out and now with my partner really really want this funny how i can tell you ladies anything how are you all anyone any symptons come on we need a bfp xxx

That is really great that you found the courage to get out and have met someone new to share your life with. I cannot even begin to imagine how hard that must have been.

I think all us first timers over 35 feel a similar fear of having left it too late. I sometimes have a moment of worry - usually when OH is not in the mood for BD. I even sometimes (just for fun) add on the worry that I will end up blaming him, as he took longer than me to want to TTC. :dohh:

40 is a significant birthday, but hey hun, you know that your fertility will be no different the week after you turn 40 than it is now. I think we all just have to stay as healthy as possible and start the new month with hope in our hearts....
..... and yes, I know that is easier to say while I am in the tww than after AF has arrived!


----------



## kelly1973

i really hope we get some bfp


----------



## SaraJewel

I worry that I will blame OH for not being able to finish for the first 6 months.......what a total waste of valuable time!

Inspirational words Viccat, 40 is just a number. We have lovely OHs, we are luckier than we think............

I feel so impatient this TWW I am driving myself nuts wondering if this is my month or not. I think I know in my heart that is isn't but there is always that hope. 

Anyone got any tips how to get thru the TWW without losing your mind????????

Viccat, any more symptoms?

Kelly are you OK?


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> i really hope we get some bfp

I hope we do too sweetie :hugs:


----------



## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> Anyone got any tips how to get thru the TWW without losing your mind????????
> 
> Viccat, any more symptoms?

I managed a zen state a couple of days ago, after accepting this month is unlikely and focusing my energies on being super-healthy for next month's egg. I have been making lots of healthy food, taking my vitamins & CoQ10 and drinking lots of fruit tea.

I feel virtuous, but I'm peeing for England, and a bit farty too. :haha:

No more symptoms - body operating as normal so I reckon AF will be here next week.


----------



## viccat

kelly1973 said:


> i really hope we get some bfp

Me too - I would be thrilled to bits if both of you got your BFPs.

I hope you are okay, and that I didn't push too hard earlier asking you to talk about what 40 meant to you. It seemed tied in to why you are feeling so low, and I believe talking things over helps sort out your feelings. :hugs:


----------



## kelly1973

hi sara yeah im ok just upset i got my hopes up over them stupid evaps i really hope this is your month give us all hope xxx


----------



## kelly1973

thanks viccat your right 40 is just a number xxx do you think them coq10 are any good?


----------



## viccat

kelly1973 said:


> thanks viccat your right 40 is just a number xxx do you think them coq10 are any good?

Not sure at the moment. I used to take Bassetts Daily Energiser tablets before which has got a small dose in. They made me feel great - but the main ingredient is B vitamins and they do that to me, so not sure it was the CoQ10.

When I started TTC I bought some Vitabiotics Pregnacare Conception but I had a weird cycle on them - heavy bleeding around the time of ovulation (first time ever) and felt dehyrated so stopped taking them.

Instead I switched to Boots Conception Support and also some CoQ10 after reading some of the stuff on here. Last month I was only taking 10mg of CoQ10 so this month I have swapped to the Boots brand and am taking 100mg a day. I only swapped over to the higher dose a few days ago and so far its just made me rather windy :blush:

p.s. Cute dog! We've got two at home as well :)


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> Anyone got any tips how to get thru the TWW without losing your mind????????
> 
> Viccat, any more symptoms?
> 
> I managed a zen state a couple of days ago, after accepting this month is unlikely and focusing my energies on being super-healthy for next month's egg. I have been making lots of healthy food, taking my vitamins & CoQ10 and drinking lots of fruit tea.
> 
> I feel virtuous, but I'm peeing for England, and a bit farty too. :haha:
> 
> No more symptoms - body operating as normal so I reckon AF will be here next week.Click to expand...

When is AF due Viccat? 

I am trying to adopt a Zen like state but feel so PMT am too grumpy for that!

If AF is late I think I might kill someone!


----------



## viccat

AF due next Wednesday - PMT yet to kick in for me, but I'm sure it will by the weekend :growlmad:


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> AF due next Wednesday - PMT yet to kick in for me, but I'm sure it will by the weekend :growlmad:

Are you a bit hopeful because of the possible implantation bleeding?

I always have my hopes up a bit, even if I deny it!:wacko:


----------



## viccat

It varies - today I'm a bit hopeful. I try to deny it too!! :winkwink:


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> It varies - today I'm a bit hopeful. I try to deny it too!! :winkwink:

I know what you mean!!!!! I think "maybe I am......." then give myself a talking too as I know our timing wasn't great. I am trying to put it out of my mind but am not doing well at this. 

Can you distract yourself???? I obviously can't as I'm on B&B so that's not really distracting myself! :haha:


----------



## kelly1973

just a quickie hope you ladies are all well big hugz xxx


----------



## viccat

Hi Kelly - all fine here. Making biscuits and cleaning the house - Nigella Lawson eat your heart out :)

What about you? How are you feeling now?


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> just a quickie hope you ladies are all well big hugz xxx

Hi Kelly, I'm OK, need to get on with my day tho!

Feeling a bit tense, like PMT :brat:

Need to go any distract myself.

How are you? How do you feel about this cycle? Good luck :hugs:


----------



## viccat

This month's not looking likely for me. All the signs are that AF is on her way, as expected.

On the plus side, I enjoyed a couple of beers with my curry last night :D


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> This month's not looking likely for me. All the signs are that AF is on her way, as expected.
> 
> On the plus side, I enjoyed a couple of beers with my curry last night :D

Good for you! 

CD29 today. AF due any day from now (cycle length has been as long as 35 days in the past!). 

Just playing the waiting game. Feeling very premenstrual, very on edge and emotional, sore BBs. I hate PMT! 

Teensy bit hopeful that AF will not arrive but like you say, all the signs are there :(


----------



## greenjelly

SaraJewel said:


> viccat said:
> 
> 
> Woohoo!! Good news SJ!
> 
> I am in the tww with you now. I think I'm just waiting for AF though - we have DTD once (yes, once!) this month. I think it was about 2 days before ovulation, so is a bit of a long shot.
> 
> Fingers crossed, and time for a nice cup of tea... :coffee:
> 
> The only positive I can see in all this, is that while I've got this to focus on, I'm not worrying too much about fertility problems. I'm fairly convinced that if I get the timing right I'll get my BFP. There's got to be an upside, right? :wacko:
> 
> Right! We have to think positive, and BTW, 2 days before ovulation is great timing!
> 
> Let's ride the TWW out together Viccat and Kelly.
> 
> GreenJelly, where are you? Hope all is OK?Click to expand...

Here I am Sara! Thanks for asking! Ive been on holiday (a week in Center Parcs) which is really good for taking ones mind off calendars and ov sticks! I just realised I probably am due to ovulate any day so might POAS in a minute! I didnt get a smiley face at all last month. We DTD a couple of times on holiday (not easy as parents and sister were in the same villa... perhaps that added to the excitement...) and need to get down to it some more this week really. Lots of babies in Center Parcs. It was a pramfest! So yes, looking like the TWW for us all. Good luck all. nice to be back! Although I dont want to start obsessing again! xxx


----------



## greenjelly

Just realised I am a week behind on the rest of the posts (note to self - finish reading thread before jumping in with a reply). most of you are at the end of the TWW now... I hope AF has stayed away for you all. Im keeping everything crossed. 
xxxx


----------



## SaraJewel

greenjelly said:


> Just realised I am a week behind on the rest of the posts (note to self - finish reading thread before jumping in with a reply). most of you are at the end of the TWW now... I hope AF has stayed away for you all. Im keeping everything crossed.
> xxxx

Hi! Nice to have you back. Glad you had good hols, never been to Center Parks but sounds like fun!

Looks like my 2WW might be coming to an end shortly! Trying to be philosophical about it and focusing on next month. But like you say, trying not to obsess!

How is everyone else? Very quiet on this thread for a change :)


----------



## viccat

greenjelly said:


> Here I am Sara! Thanks for asking! Ive been on holiday (a week in Center Parcs) which is really good for taking ones mind off calendars and ov sticks! I just realised I probably am due to ovulate any day so might POAS in a minute! I didnt get a smiley face at all last month. We DTD a couple of times on holiday (not easy as parents and sister were in the same villa... perhaps that added to the excitement...) and need to get down to it some more this week really. Lots of babies in Center Parcs. It was a pramfest! So yes, looking like the TWW for us all. Good luck all. nice to be back! Although I dont want to start obsessing again! xxx

Did you go POAS? Any luck?



SaraJewel said:


> How is everyone else? Very quiet on this thread for a change :)

LOL - just waiting for AF to turn up. Really want to get it out the way and move onto next month now!

Me and OH had a good talk a couple of weeks ago about TTC and the frustration I have felt this month. We talked about how I communicate "this is an important day" without putting him under too much pressure. He was really honest and I feel much more positive about TTC next month now.... :thumbup:


----------



## greenjelly

viccat said:


> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Here I am Sara! Thanks for asking! Ive been on holiday (a week in Center Parcs) which is really good for taking ones mind off calendars and ov sticks! I just realised I probably am due to ovulate any day so might POAS in a minute! I didnt get a smiley face at all last month. We DTD a couple of times on holiday (not easy as parents and sister were in the same villa... perhaps that added to the excitement...) and need to get down to it some more this week really. Lots of babies in Center Parcs. It was a pramfest! So yes, looking like the TWW for us all. Good luck all. nice to be back! Although I dont want to start obsessing again! xxx
> 
> Did you go POAS? Any luck?
> 
> 
> 
> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> How is everyone else? Very quiet on this thread for a change :)Click to expand...
> 
> LOL - just waiting for AF to turn up. Really want to get it out the way and move onto next month now!
> 
> Me and OH had a good talk a couple of weeks ago about TTC and the frustration I have felt this month. We talked about how I communicate "this is an important day" without putting him under too much pressure. He was really honest and I feel much more positive about TTC next month now.... :thumbup:Click to expand...

Good for you Viccat. So how do you 'communicate' without the pressure? Is there a code word? I POAS this afternoon - a cheapy stick and had just a very faint line so I will keep testing. Might even treat myself to an expensive CB stick tomorrow! We DTD last night which is good news. You know all that stuff about slow swimmers producing a girl etc? So do we stop DTD now if we think we would like a girl? I know we shouldnt be choosy in our gender selection and should be happy with anything but it does make me wonder... Sara, how you doing? xx


----------



## kelly1973

hey ladies just popping in at friends using her internet mine shut down till 11th due to move miss you guys loads ive got ewcm so the dread has started hope your all ok any news anyone dont forget me ill be back on the night of the 11th luv ya all hugs xxxx


----------



## viccat

greenjelly said:


> Good for you Viccat. So how do you 'communicate' without the pressure? Is there a code word? I POAS this afternoon - a cheapy stick and had just a very faint line so I will keep testing. Might even treat myself to an expensive CB stick tomorrow! We DTD last night which is good news. You know all that stuff about slow swimmers producing a girl etc? So do we stop DTD now if we think we would like a girl? I know we shouldnt be choosy in our gender selection and should be happy with anything but it does make me wonder... Sara, how you doing? xx

LOL ....... kind of! Apparently I've got to seduce him (not the exact words used but it suffices) rather than demand we DTD :haha:

Good news on DTD! Not a clue what is supposed to produce a girl or a boy :shrug: Personally I'd prefer a boy - perhaps I should get reading! 



kelly1973 said:


> hey ladies just popping in at friends using her internet mine shut down till 11th due to move miss you guys loads ive got ewcm so the dread has started hope your all ok any news anyone dont forget me ill be back on the night of the 11th luv ya all hugs xxxx

Hiya kelly - I was wondering how you were. Try not to stress too much - perhaps it is time for the fail safe nightie? :laugh2:


----------



## SaraJewel

Hey all, I'm OK, bit sad as can feel AF starting but sure will feel better tomorrow and gear myself up for another month. 

I would be glad to have either girl or boy!


----------



## greenjelly

Oh Sara, sorry to hear that. I like your positive thinking though. 

Kelly, hurry back! How is the move going? Are you madly packing? 

Viccat, apparently for a boy, they say you should DTD close to ovulation as the male sperm swim faster but dont live as long. I dont know. It cant be 100% correct can it. There must be a little bit left to chance. And Sara, you are right. Either would be great


----------



## viccat

Hey all - I am out for this month. The :witch: arrived and I am giving myself the silver lining that at least I didn't waste a pregnancy test for just being a day late.

How are you all doing? :flower:


----------



## HPMINI

Oh viccat - that's a shame - better luck this month!!


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Hey all - I am out for this month. The :witch: arrived and I am giving myself the silver lining that at least I didn't waste a pregnancy test for just being a day late.
> 
> How are you all doing? :flower:

Hi Viccat! Mine arrived today too, so am CD1. Are you toooo?

I felt that it was gonna start last night, like I said yesterday, felt a bit sad, but feeling much better today! PMT disappeared! (that always helps).

I also didn't waste a preggo test (was 4 days late if you based it on 28 day cycle but not really normal for me!) so yes that is also a positive. Had decided if it didn't come by Friday a.m. (had a bit of spotting past 2 days) would do a test but now no need. Another positive is that I am having a nice glass of wine to celebrate??!

Oh and another thing.............I did some symptom spotting just to see for next time and I had: Nausea, loose bowels (sorry TMI!), "soapy" taste in mouth, sore boobs (kinda burny) and last few days nipples too, and indigestion. So I am NEVER going to consider symptoms again in the 2WW. I think you can have them and either be pregnant OR get your period. I don't mind others doing it, but I don't find it fun as I get my hopes up :( So everyone else, please don't stop if it makes you feel better but I'll prob not get involved. God I feel like a bit of a killjoy now, but I was getting my hopes up a bit and felt a bit gutted initially when I realised AF was coming.

Right, now I've got that off my chest!!!!!

So we are kind of cycle buddies then Viccat? How many days cycle are you usually?

I don't think we will hear from Kelly til she's moved house.

Green, where are you at now in your cycle?

HP, what news?

SJ x x x :hugs:


----------



## HPMINI

I saw somewhere that the 2ww symptoms differ depending on which ovary does the ovulating. I know some months I had loads of symptoms and period pain other times not so much.
Symptom spotting is horrid really, plays many tricks. Having spent most months thinking I hadn't achieved meant it was more surprising when I did.
Most months I knew we hadn't dtd at the right time, however that is what I felt when I actually did!

Don't give up - it's your turn soon!

I'm at 17 weeks, nearly half way through. Getting bigger! Been to an aqua natal fitness class tonight. Doing fine though. Need to fit in a bit more exercise!


----------



## viccat

Hiya Sara - yep, today (Thursday) is also CD1 for me. I might have sneaked a glass of red with my dinner too :wine: purely medicinal to dull the tummy pain, honest. This also means I can go for my mammogram on Monday afternoon and set my mind at ease that all is well.

I am normally 28 days, although was 29 this month. Ovulation should be about CD12/13. You?

To be honest, I don't really symptom spot either. I reckon the only time I'm going to allow myself to get excited is if the usual AF symptoms *don't* happen. Then I'll probably be unbearable :haha:


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Hiya Sara - yep, today (Thursday) is also CD1 for me. I might have sneaked a glass of red with my dinner too :wine: purely medicinal to dull the tummy pain, honest. This also means I can go for my mammogram on Monday afternoon and set my mind at ease that all is well.
> 
> I am normally 28 days, although was 29 this month. Ovulation should be about CD12/13. You?
> 
> To be honest, I don't really symptom spot either. I reckon the only time I'm going to allow myself to get excited is if the usual AF symptoms *don't* happen. Then I'll probably be unbearable :haha:

Anywhere from 28-33 days over past 6 months! Used to be more or less spot on 28 until started TTC, I wonder if it is all the stress? Ovulation around CD18-19 so feels like a long time away!


----------



## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> I saw somewhere that the 2ww symptoms differ depending on which ovary does the ovulating. I know some months I had loads of symptoms and period pain other times not so much.
> Symptom spotting is horrid really, plays many tricks. Having spent most months thinking I hadn't achieved meant it was more surprising when I did.
> Most months I knew we hadn't dtd at the right time, however that is what I felt when I actually did!
> 
> Don't give up - it's your turn soon!
> 
> I'm at 17 weeks, nearly half way through. Getting bigger! Been to an aqua natal fitness class tonight. Doing fine though. Need to fit in a bit more exercise!

Aww thanks, I've been feeling pretty rubbish all day to be honest, so good to hear from you!

Wow, nearly 1/2 way through!!!!!!


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Hiya Sara - yep, today (Thursday) is also CD1 for me. I might have sneaked a glass of red with my dinner too :wine: purely medicinal to dull the tummy pain, honest. This also means I can go for my mammogram on Monday afternoon and set my mind at ease that all is well.
> 
> I am normally 28 days, although was 29 this month. Ovulation should be about CD12/13. You?
> 
> To be honest, I don't really symptom spot either. I reckon the only time I'm going to allow myself to get excited is if the usual AF symptoms *don't* happen. Then I'll probably be unbearable :haha:

Oh and Viccat, meant to ask about the Mammogram. Are you OK?


----------



## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> Oh and Viccat, meant to ask about the Mammogram. Are you OK?

Yeah, fine cheers :) I popped a separate thread up about it, so I didn't hijack this one. I'm going in on Monday to get it done, and genuinely think they will find nothing wrong. It's just a precaution. :)


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> Oh and Viccat, meant to ask about the Mammogram. Are you OK?
> 
> Yeah, fine cheers :) I popped a separate thread up about it, so I didn't hijack this one. I'm going in on Monday to get it done, and genuinely think they will find nothing wrong. It's just a precaution. :)Click to expand...

Yes, sure it will be absolutely fine. Good luck :hugs:


----------



## greenjelly

HOw did you get on Viccat? And the rest of you? I'm in the 2WW. The quite nice thing is Ive lost track slightly of what day Im on which is quite a novelty. My work is a bit manic so I dont have time to Google my calendar or time to think about my symptoms (none, it seems). I dont think I have 'caught' but time will tell. 2 of my good friends have had babies in the last month. They both seem knackered but happy! At least I get to sleep all night I suppose! xxxx


----------



## viccat

Hi all ...... having a confusing morning. CBFM has gone to "high" and it is only CD7 :wacko: Even more worrying there is a noticeable LH line there. I'm a bit concerned that I am ovulating really early and hence it will not be viable.

I think I might get some OPKs at lunch time to double check what is going on. Feeling a bit frustrated at the moment - it seems like every month something goes wrong! :shrug:


----------



## kelly1973

you hoo ladies im back how are you all xxx well i got my plus opk and bdind was bad we did it the once so not holding out on this month its driving me mad xx on a plus side i love my new house its so nice at last i can settle


----------



## SaraJewel

Hi All!!!!

Green, I wish I could lose track! GL for your 2WW, I'm CD7 now and not much to report except successful BD, but far to early!

Viccat, how was Monday's appointment? Also, did you get OPKs and what was the result? Did you have a normal period last month BTW?

Kelly! Lovely to have you back. Glad you like your new pad, and remember it only takes the once! You never know......................

I do hope one of us gets our BFP this month, we deserve it!!!!


----------



## kelly1973

i agree sara we need a bfp this month oh and im with you on the sympton spotting if i went by that id be preg every month so thats a no for me too xx


----------



## viccat

kelly1973 said:


> you hoo ladies im back how are you all xxx well i got my plus opk and bdind was bad we did it the once so not holding out on this month its driving me mad xx on a plus side i love my new house its so nice at last i can settle

Oooooooo really pleased that you're into your new house and are loving it! Perhaps next month when things are less busy you'll get more BD time? :flower:



SaraJewel said:


> Viccat, how was Monday's appointment? Also, did you get OPKs and what was the result? Did you have a normal period last month BTW?
> 
> I do hope one of us gets our BFP this month, we deserve it!!!!

Glad to hear you're getting some successful BD'ing in - it sounds as if it is getting easier all the time. Practice makes perfect! :winkwink:

Monday's appointment was fine thanks - got the results today and they are all clear, which is great. :thumbup: I am hoping I'll a) get pregnant and b) that will sort out the faulty boob. :wacko:

I got an OPK, and there is a faint LH line, but nothing to suggest the surge before ovulation. It is a relief that it agrees with the CBFM! I guess I must just have enough LH in my system for tests to pick up. :shrug:


----------



## kelly1973

glad your appointment was ok viccat must be a weight off your mind


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi all,
I'm new to this site and was really relieved to read your posts and replies.... I'm trying to concieve my second child, my first is 19 years old, so this all feels new to me. I am experiencing so much frustration and worry about whether I can even get pregnant, I'm about to turn 40 in September and trying to stay positive....
Sometimes I can't help but think that if my DH really wanted a child then wouldn't he just want to BD more? If the roles were reversed I'd be trying to get my sperm anyway I could...lol. But rationally, I get his perspective, you know, being in the mood and all that.

We have a similar issue in terms of him feeling pressured and then not able to DTD. Last month I had the surge and 36 hours later I was totally stressed out thinking 'we are running out of time' and getting more and more anxious about it. Then I had a chat with my friend and came up with the 'just pretend you don't care' along with trying to be upbeat and hopefully get him in the mood that way....teamed with sexy lingerie! Anywho, it worked and we BD just in time.
Now the crazy two week wait!


----------



## kelly1973

Hi kath1209 welcome to our thread the ladies on here are so supportive im so glad you managed to bd in time my oh always feels pressure then we cant dtd and i get so upset as im like you im 39 at min 40 next year and the thought of waiting another month feels me with dread. i dream of these stonkers these girls talk about on the other threads lmao anyway you can wait with me as in too in the tww but bding for me wasnt that great this month so not holding out much hope but ill cheer you along xx


----------



## viccat

Hi Katherine :hi: nice to have you join us.

Well done you for staying upbeat when you were on the clock! I have to admit, I'm terrible for getting upset, withdrawing and generally being a stroppy mare when OH is not playing ball. I'm very impressed with anyone who stays calm under these circumstances.

Good luck in the tww ladies - fingers crossed!

I am on CD10 and having an odd cycle. I use CBFM and it looked like I had an early LH surge on CD8. However monitor didn't think so :shrug: and EWCM started appearing as normal yesterday. We managed to DTD yesterday (just in case) and I'm waiting to see if the weekend brings another LH surge.


----------



## Katherine1209

viccat said:


> Hi Katherine :hi: nice to have you join us.
> 
> Well done you for staying upbeat when you were on the clock! I have to admit, I'm terrible for getting upset, withdrawing and generally being a stroppy mare when OH is not playing ball. I'm very impressed with anyone who stays calm under these circumstances.
> 
> Good luck in the tww ladies - fingers crossed!
> 
> I am on CD10 and having an odd cycle. I use CBFM and it looked like I had an early LH surge on CD8. However monitor didn't think so :shrug: and EWCM started appearing as normal yesterday. We managed to DTD yesterday (just in case) and I'm waiting to see if the weekend brings another LH surge.

Calmness is only on the outside, viccat, inside I'm just trying to not let on how completely crushed I'll be if we dont even try :wacko:


----------



## Katherine1209

But you should see me when we DTD at the 'right' time! I'm like a silly kid, all smiley and hopeful! :)


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> But you should see me when we DTD at the 'right' time! I'm like a silly kid, all smiley and hopeful! :)

Hahahhaha - that sounds familiar! I can go from feeling as if I could murder him, to hugging and kissing and telling him how much I love him in such a short space of time! :haha:


----------



## HPMINI

Most of the time I tried to keep inside how upset I was that we didn't try (or had no chance to try) - sometimes I couldn't though.

I had to have a chat with my husband on an occasion I was really upset, I think we were missing two opportunities when we were actually at home together (rare occurance). It then became a bit of a project but it was really difficult not to get upset when another month had passed.

But persistence does pay off!


----------



## kelly1973

so basically ladies bonk as much as much as we can lol x


----------



## Katherine1209

Yes, let's all just do whatever it takes to DTD!! I know I will, every month, until I get my BFP!!
Feeling quite hopeful and happy this morning....thanks to you all for the support and company. Even when no one is online just reading and replying to threads helps heaps. I feel so much more connected and not so alone in this journey. None of my fiends have ever been through this, lucky them....they had either accidental pregnancies or they only took a few tries....envious!!


----------



## kelly1973

i get like that on another thread i go on for people who have had miscarriage they do the smep how i dream of doing that lol


----------



## greenjelly

Hello everyone! Welcome aboard Katherine. Did we all have a nice weekend? xxx


----------



## HPMINI

Weekend was good. Sadly back in to work tomorrow.

Didn't do too much this weekend. OH was working nights. Visited my parents last night.
Taking a break from sorting wardrobes. Pile for the loft, pile for the charity bag and some which are allowed to stay. I am now over run with coat hangers and regret all those times I asked the shop if I could keep them!


----------



## Katherine1209

Weekend was too short! Had my Mum and older daughter (19y) over for dinner which was nice.
Back to work today, I'm a social worker and work with young at risk teens so it's interesting, sometimes confronting but always rewarding. The hardest part at the moment is all the young women who i work with that are pregnant, or even more heart breaking, the ones who treat their children really badly! Sometimes I just want to shake them and ask them if they know that so many women find conceiving stressful and difficult! Ok, rant over!!


----------



## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> i get like that on another thread i go on for people who have had miscarriage they do the smep how i dream of doing that lol

smep?


----------



## HPMINI

SMEP - Sperm meets egg plan

But - I did have to look it up on the abbreviations page!!


----------



## kelly1973

basically it means they bonk loads lol


----------



## kelly1973

im feeling really down bfn for me again was never hopeful this month just feels its never guna happen want to go to the docs but scared of messing my words and crap at talking dam my confidence i really think this isnt guna happen for me i feel like i should just give up on the other thred i go on im one of the last ones left from the old lot they are all pregnant so im guna stop going on there as makes me feel down
sorry ladies rant over


----------



## viccat

Oh kelly, I'm really sorry to hear that it is a BFN this month, and that you are feeling so down. :hugs:

Going to the docs sounds like a decent plan - but perhaps only if you feel up to continuing the TTC journey? When I read posts from the people using assisted conception, it sounds a tough road to take. On the other hand, it could be the fastest way to a BFP, so not an easy decision to make.

If you do decide to go, is there anyone you could take with you if you feel nervous about explaining things?


----------



## viccat

I've just had a look at your chart and it looks good - but if I am reading it correctly you are testing at 10DPO, is that correct?

Maybe you are not out this month just yet.


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> I've just had a look at your chart and it looks good - but if I am reading it correctly you are testing at 10DPO, is that correct?
> 
> Maybe you are not out this month just yet.

Hey all!

I agree with Viccat Kelly. See if there is anyone you can take along to the docs because it sounds like you do want to go. OR write down your questions before you go to make sure you remember to ask everything. I know it's scary but likely worthwhile, really because it is getting you so down.

I think I will go to my GP in a few months if no success.

Also, 10DPO is still early so don't give it up yet!

Welcome to Katherine BTW! All they way from sunny Adelaide!

CD13 for me today. Using Clearblue digital OPK this month, waiting for that Smiley face, thinking it may not appear............. Still early days tho cos ovulation probably isn't til around CD18. Managed to DTD successfully yesterday as EWM, so felt a little better but to be honest, it's too early and I am feeling the pressure. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh! (that's how I feel).

How's everyone getting on?

This rubbish weather isn't helping my mood :growlmad:


----------



## viccat

I'm having a pretty lucky month :) 

Last night was the inaugral session using a mooncup (without OH knowledge). No problem getting it in place, but I did have a bit of panic about removal this morning :shock: Not the most elegant moment I've ever had in a bathroom - next time I might light a few candles. :haha: The things we do!!

I am using OPKs as well as CBFM after my strange LH surge at CD8. DTD last night and then got my "peak" on CBFM this morning. This evening's OPK wasn't as dark as yesterday's so I'm hopeful that my surge was around the time we DTD :)

We really should BD again tonight, but I'll be gobsmacked if OH is up for it two nights in a row.


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> I'm having a pretty lucky month :)
> 
> Last night was the inaugral session using a mooncup (without OH knowledge). No problem getting it in place, but I did have a bit of panic about removal this morning :shock: Not the most elegant moment I've ever had in a bathroom - next time I might light a few candles. :haha: The things we do!!
> 
> I am using OPKs as well as CBFM after my strange LH surge at CD8. DTD last night and then got my "peak" on CBFM this morning. This evening's OPK wasn't as dark as yesterday's so I'm hopeful that my surge was around the time we DTD :)
> 
> We really should BD again tonight, but I'll be gobsmacked if OH is up for it two nights in a row.

Ha! Good for you. I have heard scary stories about Mooncup removals so well done for getting it out!!!! I hope you caught the surge, sounds like you did and timing was spot on.

We also DTD last night, EWCM but no positive OPK and more EWCM today (sometimes it seems to go on for ever!). OH said we should do it every day this week, I do think this is slightly OTT and optimistic tho! Well he's not well tonight so I guess that is that out the window, but am happy to wait til tomorrow. Like you, I would be gobsmacked if we managed 2 nights in a row!

I am starting to get stressed again about DTD near ovulation which I suspect is still a number of days away. I wish I could just chill out. And then we'll be in the TWW which is totally horrendous. Wish I could make all the stress disappear.............

Anyway, all I meant to say was well done for your timing :thumbup: Sounds spot on.

SJ x x x x:hugs:


----------



## kelly1973

well done ladies for sucessful bonking ok so mooncups ???? sounds scary just ignore my temps there not correct yeah guna go docs i think ill ring tomoz my mum dad visiting at min so could take my lovely mum love to all you ladies we deserve our bfp xx


----------



## greenjelly

Hello all
Our cycles have gone out of sync. I have been visited by the :witch: so I am out this month. Came on yesterday. Not as heavy or painful (so far) as some months so that's a blessing. I didnt really think I was PG as had no symptoms whatsoever but we did seem to DTD at the right times this month. 18 months of TTC now. It gets boring! So tempted to remove myself from Facebook as all that seems to be on there these days is photos of my friends' babies. 
GOod luck with the BDing you girlies still in the OV zone! 

xxxx


----------



## greenjelly

I meant to say that I think I am actually quite lucky as I have short cycles. This month was only 24 days which I dont think is a very good thing (not enough time for the egg to mature properly?) but at least I didnt go for days and days with no period to make me start thinking I might be PG. Anyone else got a short cycle? 24 days is the shortest cycle I have had this year - its usually about 26. How is a girl meant to keep track when it changes by up to 5 days a month?!


----------



## Katherine1209

I know what you mean. Until I started ttc i was always 28 days...now its 26 mostly, but then last moth was 28 (so got my hopes way up only to be vistied by the witch!)...

i thought i was meant to af yesterday, but nothing and a BFN!
tested again this morning and again a BFN!

Just put me out of my misery and either give me af or BFP!


----------



## Katherine1209

Try not to stress SJ, i know its hard though...
Thinking of you all and hoping.....


----------



## kelly1973

hi green sorry the witch got you my cycle changes every month but usually 26 

hope you dont mind me asking as you mite of already said have you been to docs to discuss sorry if you already said xx

morning to all you ladies bfn for me but no surprise really i have no symptons wat soever


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> well done ladies for sucessful bonking ok so mooncups ???? sounds scary just ignore my temps there not correct yeah guna go docs i think ill ring tomoz my mum dad visiting at min so could take my lovely mum love to all you ladies we deserve our bfp xx

Sounds good, let us know how you get on/what they say. Good to have your mum around.

Successful bonking continued tonight, unbelievable! We are breaking all personal records............

Mood a bit better, still no positive OPK though. Trying to be patient and hopefully our good run will continue :winkwink:


----------



## Katherine1209

Glad to hear about your record breaking SJ

I had another BFN this morning, and i think i feel the wrath of the witch! Damn her! Hopefully my OH and I can break some records of our own in about 12 days lol!!


----------



## Katherine1209

:witch:She came, damn her


----------



## kelly1973

sorry kath the witch came wat a cow. hugs xx
not getting my hopes up this time
sara hooray for bonking..

afm i think i got another evap quite dark line but not holding out any hope


----------



## viccat

kelly1973 said:


> well done ladies for sucessful bonking ok so mooncups ???? sounds scary just ignore my temps there not correct yeah guna go docs i think ill ring tomoz my mum dad visiting at min so could take my lovely mum love to all you ladies we deserve our bfp xx

LOL - mooncup is designed for AF, and is a little rubber cup that sits inside you. A few people use them for TTC to keep the swimmers where they need to be, so I decided to give it a go (without telling OH :winkwink:) It seemed to be pretty effective although I kept waking up thinking "should I take it out yet?" :dohh:

I am really pleased that you've got your mum for support kelly. Did you manage to get an appointment?




greenjelly said:


> I meant to say that I think I am actually quite lucky as I have short cycles. This month was only 24 days which I dont think is a very good thing (not enough time for the egg to mature properly?) but at least I didnt go for days and days with no period to make me start thinking I might be PG. Anyone else got a short cycle? 24 days is the shortest cycle I have had this year - its usually about 26. How is a girl meant to keep track when it changes by up to 5 days a month?!

Hi greenjelly - sorry to hear that the :witch: has arrived. Enjoy a glass of vino and we'll see you back in action in another week's time :)

24 doesn't seem too far off the average cycle length to me. Do you know what length your Follicular Phase and Luteal Phase are? From what I have read, it is the length of the Luteal Phase that is important. I cannot imagine that a couple of days off each phase makes much difference though :shrug:


And SJ ....... enjoy your practice sweety ..... I'm suitably jealous! :winkwink:


----------



## SaraJewel

Sorry about AF Katherine/Green, it's a total bummer isn't it? Are you OK? Sometimes it's a relief to know one way or the other I think, it's the limbo time when AF is a bit late, or a little bit of spotting happens that I think is a total killer...........!

I am still without that positive OPK. It's CD15 now. I have the feeling tho from other cycles and looking at CM (think I am getting a bit obsessed by CM!) that I don't ovulate til CD18 or 19. So it we don't BD again then there is no chance of timing being good :( I know I am imagining the worst case scenario tho. I should chill out and remember when we used to BD with NO FINISHING AT ALL FOR 5-6 MONTHS!!! Crazy. I'm so glad those times seem to be over (fingers crossed!!!).

If I ever get a positive OPK I will be totally over the moon!

Green, like Viccat says, it's the luteal phase length that's important. From what I can gather, as long as it's 10 or more days between ovulation and AF, no probs, but some sites say 12 or more is better, but I think it's like anything, and I've read about girls with a luteal phase of less than 10 having no probs conceiving.

We do love to overthink it all, don't we????

Kelly, how are you? Are you OK?????


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> sorry kath the witch came wat a cow. hugs xx
> not getting my hopes up this time
> sara hooray for bonking..
> 
> afm i think i got another evap quite dark line but not holding out any hope

Evap quite dark line sounds quite hopeful? How many days til AF due? Must be tough waiting it out................. I hope so much you get your BFP, it is our time soon surely?????:hugs:


----------



## Katherine1209

SaraJewel said:


> Sorry about AF Katherine/Green, it's a total bummer isn't it? Are you OK? Sometimes it's a relief to know one way or the other I think, it's the limbo time when AF is a bit late, or a little bit of spotting happens that I think is a total killer...........!
> 
> I am still without that positive OPK. It's CD15 now. I have the feeling tho from other cycles and looking at CM (think I am getting a bit obsessed by CM!) that I don't ovulate til CD18 or 19. So it we don't BD again then there is no chance of timing being good :( I know I am imagining the worst case scenario tho. I should chill out and remember when we used to BD with NO FINISHING AT ALL FOR 5-6 MONTHS!!! Crazy. I'm so glad those times seem to be over (fingers crossed!!!).
> 
> If I ever get a positive OPK I will be totally over the moon!
> 
> Green, like Viccat says, it's the luteal phase length that's important. From what I can gather, as long as it's 10 or more days between ovulation and AF, no probs, but some sites say 12 or more is better, but I think it's like anything, and I've read about girls with a luteal phase of less than 10 having no probs conceiving.
> 
> We do love to overthink it all, don't we????
> 
> Kelly, how are you? Are you OK?????

Thanks SJ, I'm okay. Disappointed but trying to focus on this month...hopefully there will lots of BDing but "I don't want to 'over think it'....mmm who am i kidding, i over think most things about ttc...lol
I did get some results back from my blood test. The doc said I am definitely ovulating so that is a relief. Now I'm trying to talk my OH into having some of his own investigations...
Hope you got your positive OPK soon! xx


----------



## kelly1973

hi ladies bfn on asda stick so thats me out waiting on af like an idiot again i got my hopes up


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## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> hi ladies bfn on asda stick so thats me out waiting on af like an idiot again i got my hopes up

Sorry to hear that, kelly, I try not to get my hopes up too, but it is really hard. Big hugs to you xx :hugs:


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## kelly1973

i think i just got my big fat positive
 



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## viccat

Yyyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!!!

:wohoo: :wohoo: :wohoo: :wohoo: :wohoo: :wohoo:

I am bizarrely chuffed to be the first to reply! Keeping my fingers crossed that you've got a sticky bean there kelly! :hugs:


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## kelly1973

Thanks viccat i really hope so too x


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> i think i just got my big fat positive

OHMYGOD! Ammaaaaaaaaaaazing!!!! I knew it had to be our time soon. Congrats, how are you feeling????????????????????? What test did you do?:happydance:


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## kelly1973

i know i know i did a first response im so scared i never thought was in with a chance just once ladies i sobbed my heart out when i saw the line


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> i know i know i did a first response im so scared i never thought was in with a chance just once ladies i sobbed my heart out when i saw the line

Aw, you totally deserve it! I looked at your chart, you did it once with an OPK but twice before that didn't you? Sorry if I am being too nosey!

Did you have any symptoms this month or none?

Wow, it's so amazing! You must still be in shock!!!:thumbup:


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## kelly1973

sara i really am when i got my plus opk we didnt manage but we did it the day after so that was when i also used concieve plus xx im so nervous now hope this one sticks


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## kelly1973

my main sympton is mega bloating real bad i have cramps so bit worried hope af doent come


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> my main sympton is mega bloating real bad i have cramps so bit worried hope af doent come

I am crossing all my fingers and toes for you! And of course sending you big hugs. :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


----------



## greenjelly

ARGH!! Kelly! Thats brilliant news! Catching up on a few days posts here so bear with me - did you get a few BFNs and then suddenly a positive?! And really, no symptoms to make you think you might be? I'm really pleased for you. It must feel so weird to know its finally happened! 
:happydance::happydance:


----------



## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> hi green sorry the witch got you my cycle changes every month but usually 26
> 
> hope you dont mind me asking as you mite of already said have you been to docs to discuss sorry if you already said xx
> 
> morning to all you ladies bfn for me but no surprise really i have no symptons wat soever

I dont mind you asking Viccat. I had a test about 6 months ago which suggested I am ovulating. So thats good. The next step is to check my tubes but we need to get my OH's swimmers tested first before they will look any more into my 'bits'. He should be ok as he has fathered before although it was a while back now. I suppose I keep naievly (sp?) believing that it will just happen naturally. What is this CQ10 I keep reading about? xxxx


----------



## greenjelly

viccat said:


> kelly1973 said:
> 
> 
> well done ladies for sucessful bonking ok so mooncups ???? sounds scary just ignore my temps there not correct yeah guna go docs i think ill ring tomoz my mum dad visiting at min so could take my lovely mum love to all you ladies we deserve our bfp xx
> 
> LOL - mooncup is designed for AF, and is a little rubber cup that sits inside you. A few people use them for TTC to keep the swimmers where they need to be, so I decided to give it a go (without telling OH :winkwink:) It seemed to be pretty effective although I kept waking up thinking "should I take it out yet?" :dohh:
> 
> I am really pleased that you've got your mum for support kelly. Did you manage to get an appointment?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> I meant to say that I think I am actually quite lucky as I have short cycles. This month was only 24 days which I dont think is a very good thing (not enough time for the egg to mature properly?) but at least I didnt go for days and days with no period to make me start thinking I might be PG. Anyone else got a short cycle? 24 days is the shortest cycle I have had this year - its usually about 26. How is a girl meant to keep track when it changes by up to 5 days a month?!Click to expand...
> 
> Hi greenjelly - sorry to hear that the :witch: has arrived. Enjoy a glass of vino and we'll see you back in action in another week's time :)
> 
> 24 doesn't seem too far off the average cycle length to me. Do you know what length your Follicular Phase and Luteal Phase are? From what I have read, it is the length of the Luteal Phase that is important. I cannot imagine that a couple of days off each phase makes much difference though :shrug:
> 
> 
> And SJ ....... enjoy your practice sweety ..... I'm suitably jealous! :winkwink:Click to expand...

I dont know what my follicular phase length is. Isnt it always 14 days from ovulation to CD1? So if my cycle this month was 24 days, does that mean I ov'd on day 12? Seems a bit regimented for my body! How do I find out more details? I dont temp...


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## Seity

Congrats Kelly! That's a positive all right.


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## Katherine1209

OMG Kelly, I am soooo happy for you! I actually got butterflies when I saw your test. I am thinking of you and your little bean xx
BTW my OH thinks I'm a bit nuts as I said out loud when I saw your post "OMG, Kelly got a positive!"


----------



## SaraJewel

Katherine1209 said:


> OMG Kelly, I am soooo happy for you! I actually got butterflies when I saw your test. I am thinking of you and your little bean xx
> BTW my OH thinks I'm a bit nuts as I said out loud when I saw your post "OMG, Kelly got a positive!"

That's funny, but I am chuffed for her too!

Feeling a bit down as our good spell seems to have run out, just when I think I am around ovulation :nope: OH too tired last night, then unsuccessful attempt this morning. No positive OPK. Starting to wonder what the point of all this is and if am even ovulating. I wonder if temping would give me a better idea? I don't think OPKs work for me. I am fed up of seeing an empty circle on the display. :cry: 

Gonna get on with my day now and try and forget about it. I hate it that it sometimes takes over my life...........

Hope everyone else OK


----------



## Katherine1209

SaraJewel said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> OMG Kelly, I am soooo happy for you! I actually got butterflies when I saw your test. I am thinking of you and your little bean xx
> BTW my OH thinks I'm a bit nuts as I said out loud when I saw your post "OMG, Kelly got a positive!"
> 
> That's funny, but I am chuffed for her too!
> 
> Feeling a bit down as our good spell seems to have run out, just when I think I am around ovulation :nope: OH too tired last night, then unsuccessful attempt this morning. No positive OPK. Starting to wonder what the point of all this is and if am even ovulating. I wonder if temping would give me a better idea? I don't think OPKs work for me. I am fed up of seeing an empty circle on the display. :cry:
> 
> Gonna get on with my day now and try and forget about it. I hate it that it sometimes takes over my life...........
> 
> Hope everyone else OKClick to expand...

I can sooo relate Sara :hugs:
As much as i am trying not to I am already getting anxious about ovulation, already adding up days and working out when we should BD! Then I worry about the OH, will he be too tired, too busy, too distracted, too pressured......ugh!!
Think I'll go and have a pizza now!


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## kelly1973

sara i really know how you feel i would not make a pass at other half at all bet he then comes onto you temping will let you know but has to be the same time every day i was always crap at it dont be down honey big cyber hugs to you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## viccat

greenjelly said:


> I dont know what my follicular phase length is. Isnt it always 14 days from ovulation to CD1? So if my cycle this month was 24 days, does that mean I ov'd on day 12? Seems a bit regimented for my body! How do I find out more details? I dont temp...

Apparently your luteal phase (ovulation to CD1) doesn't change from month to month. If your cycle changes length, then it means your follicular phase (CD1 to ovulation) has changed length rather than your luteal phase (ovulation to CD1).

I never knew that until recently - and it has proved true. In month 1 of using CBFM I ovulated (I guess) on CD12 and had a cycle of 28 days. Month 2 I ovulated on CD13 and my cycle was 29 days......

Do you know which day you ovulate?

Kelly - how are you doing today? Any more tests to share with us? :D


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## kelly1973

hi viccat im a nervous wreck did another frer this morning no darker but still positive im so worried already i really hope this is it xx

hope all you ladies are ok mega hugs to you


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> hi viccat im a nervous wreck did another frer this morning no darker but still positive im so worried already i really hope this is it xx
> 
> hope all you ladies are ok mega hugs to you


Thank you for being so sweet to me. Still positive that's great!!!!! You should speak to HPMINI, where are you HP? 

Feeling a bit better. Tried again last night (OH idea, didn't say anything like you said and he asked me) and it was a success!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am a bit worried about the ovulation thing and maybe I'm not O'ing. So am seriously thinking will do the temping next month to check. Think I am done with OPKs. OH is away during likely fertile time next month, so pressure will be off and I can try and get to grips with things.

How is everyone this morning?

Lovely and sunny in the UK for a change!

Kelly hang in there, we are here for you. I would be nervous wreck too:hugs:


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## SaraJewel

Katherine1209 said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> OMG Kelly, I am soooo happy for you! I actually got butterflies when I saw your test. I am thinking of you and your little bean xx
> BTW my OH thinks I'm a bit nuts as I said out loud when I saw your post "OMG, Kelly got a positive!"
> 
> That's funny, but I am chuffed for her too!
> 
> Feeling a bit down as our good spell seems to have run out, just when I think I am around ovulation :nope: OH too tired last night, then unsuccessful attempt this morning. No positive OPK. Starting to wonder what the point of all this is and if am even ovulating. I wonder if temping would give me a better idea? I don't think OPKs work for me. I am fed up of seeing an empty circle on the display. :cry:
> 
> Gonna get on with my day now and try and forget about it. I hate it that it sometimes takes over my life...........
> 
> Hope everyone else OKClick to expand...
> 
> I can sooo relate Sara :hugs:
> As much as i am trying not to I am already getting anxious about ovulation, already adding up days and working out when we should BD! Then I worry about the OH, will he be too tired, too busy, too distracted, too pressured......ugh!!
> Think I'll go and have a pizza now!Click to expand...

Kath, do you track ovulation at all or have you done that in the past?


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## kelly1973

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees for bonking sara wahoo i would keep up with the opk cant you use the cheap ones i used there fab

yeah wheres hp wahoo hp?????

hows everyone else


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## Katherine1209

Sara, I've been using OPK since March. Before that, ntnp since September.
At first I thought I wasn't ovulating so started testing twice a day (bought a whole heap of cheap ones) and found my LH surge was often there in the morning and gone by night so I missed it a couple of times.
I've never temped but thinking about it and might try one of those saliva microscopes...
How's your OPK experience so far?


----------



## Katherine1209

Hey Kelly! How are you traveling? I'm feeling pretty good. Your BFP encouraged me to stay hopeful.


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## kelly1973

im glad kath i feel bit guilty posting sometimes if you guys want me to leave i will xx


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> im glad kath i feel bit guilty posting sometimes if you guys want me to leave i will xx

STAY!!! you give us hope you and HP, and of course Seity!

I am worried about internet cheapies arriving and OH wondering what they are as I think will freak him out........... 

I am planning chilled month next month, no pressure to conceive as timing won't work with OH away, so can see when temps do and look for pattern. If there isn't one then off to the GP I think! To be honest I would rather know that we can't conceive than keep hammering away at it every month for no point! :haha:

I know Kelly, I was over the moon and in shock when we did it successfully!

Don't be a stranger, we need you here :hugs: Don't forget us with all your new preggo friends!


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## SaraJewel

Katherine1209 said:


> Sara, I've been using OPK since March. Before that, ntnp since September.
> At first I thought I wasn't ovulating so started testing twice a day (bought a whole heap of cheap ones) and found my LH surge was often there in the morning and gone by night so I missed it a couple of times.
> I've never temped but thinking about it and might try one of those saliva microscopes...
> How's your OPK experience so far?

What time of day do you temp and how often? I am rubbish at not drinking loads so my urine is pretty dilute most of time. The experts at Clearblue said testing with FMU would be OK, but a lot of people have said it isn't!

Use Boots own last month and the line got darker but not as dark as line around CD 17. Made sense tho, seemed to be a day or so before O last month based on CM.

This month have tested twice a day with nothing. First think in AM and then when home from work (around 5pm). Will keep going but not doing it again next month. Can't do it during the day, totally impractical where I work!!!

I thought it might make things easier but it has just made me more worried!


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## HPMINI

Helloooooooooo! I'm here!

Kelly, the test looks good. I actually left it a whole week before testing so my line was so dark! Fingers crossed it sticks for you.

I'm feeling quite round! Shocking that I'm only about 20 weeks! And it's not twins, there's no way another one can be hiding! I have my next scan on 27th July - very exciting! Will be good to have a reminder that something is there.

Not going to find out the sex though!

Other than feeling round and having clothing crises and starting to find it awkward to bend comfortably all is okay.

I never shared my ovulation test kits with my OH - I think he would have found it too freaky.


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## kelly1973

hey hp hello hope glad your ok xxx
Af day today pleeeeeeeease dont come

hows everyone today xx


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## Katherine1209

SaraJewel said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Sara, I've been using OPK since March. Before that, ntnp since September.
> At first I thought I wasn't ovulating so started testing twice a day (bought a whole heap of cheap ones) and found my LH surge was often there in the morning and gone by night so I missed it a couple of times.
> I've never temped but thinking about it and might try one of those saliva microscopes...
> How's your OPK experience so far?
> 
> What time of day do you temp and how often? I am rubbish at not drinking loads so my urine is pretty dilute most of time. The experts at Clearblue said testing with FMU would be OK, but a lot of people have said it isn't!
> 
> Use Boots own last month and the line got darker but not as dark as line around CD 17. Made sense tho, seemed to be a day or so before O last month based on CM.
> 
> This month have tested twice a day with nothing. First think in AM and then when home from work (around 5pm). Will keep going but not doing it again next month. Can't do it during the day, totally impractical where I work!!!
> 
> I thought it might make things easier but it has just made me more worried!Click to expand...

I haven't ever used temps, but I think you are meant to do it at the same time each day. Some info I read says do it first thing when you get up. I found the OPK confusing to start with as didnt get a second line. I usually test before work, about 8 and then about 12 hours later. I don't share with my OH unless it shows the second dark line. Then I usually tell him I'm likely to ov in 24 hours...but really there is supposed to be a 36 hour window. Then I try to leave it up to him. Well as much as possible as I tend to get really anxious around then, thinking he might be too tired etc...

I had blood test done on day 21 to see if I am ovulating, which showed I am, so that's something! I would love him to have a test but he's not really that proactive so it might take some time. He is much more laid back about it than I am.


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## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> im glad kath i feel bit guilty posting sometimes if you guys want me to leave i will xx

Are you kidding, we need you. You provide hope and encouragement for all of us. I look forward to hearing about your journey....don't leave!


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## viccat

hi all - just a quick message as i am on hols and won't be around for a few days. at least it makes the 2ww go by faster!

Hope everyone is happy and healthy, and kelly that AF doesn't show up.

:hug:


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## kelly1973

have a nice time viccat..
Thanks ladies i want to stay here feel we have something in common feeling poo today think i have a headcold coming dodne another test much darker easy to see now


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## kelly1973

you ladies are quiet hope your all ok


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> you ladies are quiet hope your all ok

Yep, not much to report! In 2WW, trying not to think about it too much.

Glad did bonking last week, too hot to do anything last few days!:haha:


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## kelly1973

lol i know dp dying for a shag he can get stuffed lol only joking ladies tee hee


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## Katherine1209

I'm expecting to ov on the 31 st, I hope! And I always get a bit crazy leading up to it. :wacko::wacko:.. .worrying about whether we will BD...worrying about the tww...worrying about whether I'll get a BFN again...worrying this will never happen....crazy stuff! :dohh: 
And then at the same time trying to stay hopeful and positive :dust:
Enough about my crazy times! 

How is everyone?
Kelly, how are you doing?


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## HPMINI

Katherine - you have every reason to stay hopeful and positive - that's because it will be your turn soon! 

Loads of people said that to me and I didn't really believe them but tomorrow I am having my 20 week scan! Nervous but excited!


----------



## SaraJewel

Katherine1209 said:


> I'm expecting to ov on the 31 st, I hope! And I always get a bit crazy leading up to it. :wacko::wacko:.. .worrying about whether we will BD...worrying about the tww...worrying about whether I'll get a BFN again...worrying this will never happen....crazy stuff! :dohh:
> And then at the same time trying to stay hopeful and positive :dust:
> Enough about my crazy times!
> 
> How is everyone?
> Kelly, how are you doing?

I know EXACTLY what you mean! In horrible 2WW now. Trying to cast it all away from my mind, but GOD it's hard!

Good luck with the BD-ing.............

Thanks for your positive words HP. I hope my time does come too!

Good luck for your scan. You can share the pic here too if you want to, I'm sure everyone will be thrilled to see it! I know I would love to. :hugs:


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## Katherine1209

Thanks Sara, I've got my hopeful face on!


----------



## HPMINI




----------



## Katherine1209

HPMINI said:


> Katherine - you have every reason to stay hopeful and positive - that's because it will be your turn soon!
> 
> Loads of people said that to me and I didn't really believe them but tomorrow I am having my 20 week scan! Nervous but excited!

Thanks HP, most of the time I stay hopeful... x


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## Katherine1209

HPMINI said:


> View attachment 447937

Ohhh, that is soooo lovely to see HP, a beautiful little bubby!!!... :hugs:


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## kelly1973

wow hp fabulous thankyou xx

im ok kath thanks having some wobble days im so worried im going to have another mc at the minute lots of the other ladies take low dose asprin to help with mc they self subscribe i really dont know what to do

sara yay for tww xx


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## HPMINI

kelly - I'm not sure that you should self prescribe yourself anything.

Fingers crossed that your bean sticks!


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## kelly1973

thanks hp me too pma thats what i have to have xx


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## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> wow hp fabulous thankyou xx
> 
> im ok kath thanks having some wobble days im so worried im going to have another mc at the minute lots of the other ladies take low dose asprin to help with mc they self subscribe i really dont know what to do
> 
> sara yay for tww xx

Can you get some advise about the aspirin, like do you have 24 hour healthlines? We have advise lines you can call and ask about things like that...but I have heard about the aspirin thing too.

I'm on cd 10 today so trying to stay positive for BDing in the next few days, even though OH is already sounding like he has a lot on this week....:shrug:


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## kelly1973

fingers crossed kath we need some more bfp this month xxxxxxxxxxx


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## Katherine1209

I'm hoping for BFPs all round! Bring it on!!

Kelly...stay strong and positive.... though i know it must be hard to stay strong and not stress when you have experienced such heartbreak xxxx. Sending you so much :dust:


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> View attachment 447937

Aww how absolutely amazing! You must be on cloud 9????!!!!

Thanks for posting.:happydance:


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## SaraJewel

Katherine1209 said:


> I'm hoping for BFPs all round! Bring it on!!
> 
> Kelly...stay strong and positive.... though i know it must be hard to stay strong and not stress when you have experienced such heartbreak xxxx. Sending you so much :dust:

Yep Kelly, keep strong. How are you today? 

Kath, good luck with BD-ing...........

Feeling PMT symptoms, CD25. Doing quite well with keeping mind off things but it's sooo hard!


----------



## Katherine1209

SaraJewel said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> I'm hoping for BFPs all round! Bring it on!!
> 
> Kelly...stay strong and positive.... though i know it must be hard to stay strong and not stress when you have experienced such heartbreak xxxx. Sending you so much :dust:
> 
> Yep Kelly, keep strong. How are you today?
> 
> Kath, good luck with BD-ing...........
> 
> Feeling PMT symptoms, CD25. Doing quite well with keeping mind off things but it's sooo hard!Click to expand...

I'll be doing my best to put no pressure on the oh, well I'll try :rofl:
Glad to hear your able to take yor mind off the tww...mostly...don't even worry about symptoms, you just never know :flower:


----------



## kelly1973

thanks ladies im so nervous as my first appointment is at 8 weeks and this is just to get paperwork done first scan not till 12 weeks the last time i had my 12 week scan i was told i had a mmc and baby had stopped growing at 6 weeks scared im guna have to wait that long again to be told the same thing


----------



## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> thanks ladies im so nervous as my first appointment is at 8 weeks and this is just to get paperwork done first scan not till 12 weeks the last time i had my 12 week scan i was told i had a mmc and baby had stopped growing at 6 weeks scared im guna have to wait that long again to be told the same thing

Stay hopeful..I have a really good feeling for you :hugs:
Can you talk to the dr and let them know about your worry? They might be able to do/say something to reassure you??


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> thanks ladies im so nervous as my first appointment is at 8 weeks and this is just to get paperwork done first scan not till 12 weeks the last time i had my 12 week scan i was told i had a mmc and baby had stopped growing at 6 weeks scared im guna have to wait that long again to be told the same thing

That must have been devastating. 

Have you spoken to your doctor about how scared you are?

I think you should make an appointment as it's such a long time to worry.

What about the girls on the other thread you post on? How did they cope?

:hugs::hugs:


----------



## kelly1973

lots of them went on to have reasurrence scans a heart beat can be seen from about 6 to 7 weeks i think so think i will go docs then and talk to them the doc wasnt helpful at all just smiled at me like i was stupid im 5 weeks 3 days so will pop along in just over a week


----------



## Katherine1209

So the OH and I BD this morning :happydance::happydance:
He set the alarm to get up early so we could DTD before i went to work....yay!!
I've been using OPK and thought I would get a double dark line today, as expecting ov Thursday, cd 14... But there was only one line...WTH! Did i even ov? Has anyone else had this happen? I'll keep testing for a couple of days but really confused :wacko:


----------



## viccat

Hey all - back from the holidays. De-stressed but shhhhhhh don't tell anyone ... I'm quite happy to be back at work :blush: On the positive side I had a teetotal week so feel virtuous (even if I am gagging for a glass of red).

Kelly - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you hon. I cannot imagine how awful that 12 week scan must have been.

Katherine - glad you've got the OH so well trained! I might need to suggest something similar to mine - he is a morning person after all :D Unfortunately I cannot help on the OPK question. I've only used them a handful of times and have always got two lines.

SJ - I am CD27 and reckon I am out this cycle too. I noticed the good old irratibility of PMT at the weekend and everything suggests AF is on her way.

Oh well ..... i get two goes in August :happydance:


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Hey all - back from the holidays. De-stressed but shhhhhhh don't tell anyone ... I'm quite happy to be back at work :blush: On the positive side I had a teetotal week so feel virtuous (even if I am gagging for a glass of red).
> 
> Kelly - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you hon. I cannot imagine how awful that 12 week scan must have been.
> 
> Katherine - glad you've got the OH so well trained! I might need to suggest something similar to mine - he is a morning person after all :D Unfortunately I cannot help on the OPK question. I've only used them a handful of times and have always got two lines.
> 
> SJ - I am CD27 and reckon I am out this cycle too. I noticed the good old irratibility of PMT at the weekend and everything suggests AF is on her way.
> 
> Oh well ..... i get two goes in August :happydance:

OOOh, you sound so positive, that's great you had such a good time!

Yes, I am starting to feel grouchy, having trouble keeping things off my mind but doing my best! Well only another 2-4 days to wait!

That sounds like a very good idea Kelly x


----------



## SaraJewel

Katherine1209 said:


> So the OH and I BD this morning :happydance::happydance:
> He set the alarm to get up early so we could DTD before i went to work....yay!!
> I've been using OPK and thought I would get a double dark line today, as expecting ov Thursday, cd 14... But there was only one line...WTH! Did i even ov? Has anyone else had this happen? I'll keep testing for a couple of days but really confused :wacko:

I guess your O can shift each cycle and the OPKs don't always pick up the surge due to timing. I am not speaking from experience as I've never had a proper positive (only a near positive) but have heard things like this from other girls. I would say keep testing like you say x


----------



## HPMINI

Kelly - "google" Cow and Gate - there is a phone number on there for advice and I am sure they'll know about the aspirin thing.


----------



## kelly1973

you could of missed the surge are you sure of dates when you ov. some people temp as well that way you can tell when you have ov by the temp rise.

loving all the bedding ladies oh is sulking as we havent done it for ages lol


----------



## Katherine1209

Thanks for your advice...I posted a pic of my OPK in my journal page and think I ov on Monday...but still testing! Just in case...Lol


----------



## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> you could of missed the surge are you sure of dates when you ov. some people temp as well that way you can tell when you have ov by the temp rise.
> 
> loving all the bedding ladies oh is sulking as we havent done it for ages lol

I usually ov on cd13 or 14 - 26/28 day cycles...hoping I did and hoping for a bit more BDing tonight, if I'm lucky!

Haha, make him wait I say!


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi viccat :wave: Glad you had a relaxing holiday!


----------



## viccat

Yoohoo :hi: I've just been looking at your OPK piccies in your journal, and yep I would agree the third from bottom looks good! I never got one that dark last month, although CBFM gave me a peak. We have similar cycles although I am 14 days behind (ahead?) of you :)


Kelly - I would say go and DTD with your hubby. I never realised until I was the one getting frustrated how much it can impact how you feel about your other half and your relationship. He needs to know you find him attractive and want him for more than just his :spermy:


----------



## Katherine1209

Viccat, your wise reply made me think I was being a bit harsh, you are so right about our OHs knowing we love them and want them for more than just their :spermy: :blush:
Is a cbfm a digital OPK?


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> Is a cbfm a digital OPK?

Yep - it measures both estrogen and LH, as well as using info from previous cycles to tell you the best time to DTD.

Oh, and the :witch: has turned up so I am onto another (my 7th) cycle of TTC...


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Is a cbfm a digital OPK?
> 
> Yep - it measures both estrogen and LH, as well as using info from previous cycles to tell you the best time to DTD.
> 
> Oh, and the :witch: has turned up so I am onto another (my 7th) cycle of TTC...Click to expand...

Oh poo. Sorry to hear about that, I wondered why you were feeling Blah....

AF not here yet for me but not due yet, but sure won't be far behing you :hugs: Then it will be my 12th cycle :(


----------



## viccat

OH and I talked this evening about TTC and the fact that we've done 6 months. We have agreed to try naturally for another 3 months. I am hoping that having these honest conversations will help him understand the importance of more BDing! :bunny:


----------



## kelly1973

yeah i know that but to be fair with ms and dog tired im really not up to it at the min,he understands.

hope your all ok sara any symptons


----------



## Katherine1209

viccat said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Is a cbfm a digital OPK?
> 
> Yep - it measures both estrogen and LH, as well as using info from previous cycles to tell you the best time to DTD.
> 
> Oh, and the :witch: has turned up so I am onto another (my 7th) cycle of TTC...Click to expand...

Sorry to hear that Viccat! Damn :witch: sending you :hugs:


----------



## Katherine1209

viccat said:


> OH and I talked this evening about TTC and the fact that we've done 6 months. We have agreed to try naturally for another 3 months. I am hoping that having these honest conversations will help him understand the importance of more BDing! :bunny:

Ive been having similar conversations with my OH and this cycle we DTD twice, cd12 and 14 :happydance: That is good for us....:haha: I hope that's enough :shrug:


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> Ive been having similar conversations with my OH and this cycle we DTD twice, cd12 and 14 :happydance: That is good for us....:haha: I hope that's enough :shrug:

Yup - twice in the "window" I would consider a good month too! :thumbup: Fingers crossed Katherine for your BFP.


----------



## kelly1973

yeh fingers crossed kath x


----------



## SaraJewel

Katherine1209 said:


> viccat said:
> 
> 
> OH and I talked this evening about TTC and the fact that we've done 6 months. We have agreed to try naturally for another 3 months. I am hoping that having these honest conversations will help him understand the importance of more BDing! :bunny:
> 
> Ive been having similar conversations with my OH and this cycle we DTD twice, cd12 and 14 :happydance: That is good for us....:haha: I hope that's enough :shrug:Click to expand...

That is a good month, same as me last month, then CD 17 which I think was too late (reckon O was CD16).

Kelly, funny you were asking about symptoms because I know they don't mean anything, but was starting to wonder.... So looked back to last month's when I had a bit of a rant, and they were: Nausea, loose bowels (sorry TMI!), "soapy" taste in mouth, sore boobs (kinda burny) and last few days nipples too, and indigestion.

This month I have occasional nausea, light-headed, funny taste in mouth, sore boobs (kinda burny but this time shooting pains too) and last few days nipples too. Not feeling PMT now which is normal for me just before period, actually feeling quite chilled out (although start to get stressed when go to toilet in case get nasty surprise!). I think my "symptoms" are PMT. I am CD 29 today, cycle usually 30 days plus last 2 months so early days yet. I reckon AF will come tomorrow or Sat.

It's horrible playing the waiting game, so my mantra for this months is "I coped last month so I will be fine this month if I get AF" and that seems to make me feel better!

Kelly and HP you have given me hope!

How's everyone else? I see Green has disappeared off the scene again??!! Green are you there???

SJ


----------



## Katherine1209

SaraJewel said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> viccat said:
> 
> 
> OH and I talked this evening about TTC and the fact that we've done 6 months. We have agreed to try naturally for another 3 months. I am hoping that having these honest conversations will help him understand the importance of more BDing! :bunny:
> 
> Ive been having similar conversations with my OH and this cycle we DTD twice, cd12 and 14 :happydance: That is good for us....:haha: I hope that's enough :shrug:Click to expand...
> 
> That is a good month, same as me last month, then CD 17 which I think was too late (reckon O was CD16).
> 
> Kelly, funny you were asking about symptoms because I know they don't mean anything, but was starting to wonder.... So looked back to last month's when I had a bit of a rant, and they were: Nausea, loose bowels (sorry TMI!), "soapy" taste in mouth, sore boobs (kinda burny) and last few days nipples too, and indigestion.
> 
> This month I have occasional nausea, light-headed, funny taste in mouth, sore boobs (kinda burny but this time shooting pains too) and last few days nipples too. Not feeling PMT now which is normal for me just before period, actually feeling quite chilled out (although start to get stressed when go to toilet in case get nasty surprise!). I think my "symptoms" are PMT. I am CD 29 today, cycle usually 30 days plus last 2 months so early days yet. I reckon AF will come tomorrow or Sat.
> 
> It's horrible playing the waiting game, so my mantra for this months is "I coped last month so I will be fine this month if I get AF" and that seems to make me feel better!
> 
> Kelly and HP you have given me hope!
> 
> How's everyone else? I see Green has disappeared off the scene again??!! Green are you there???
> 
> SJClick to expand...

Yay for good months, I say :happydance:
The beginning of the tww for me...just might use your mantra Sara :thumbup:
Along with my '90% of us will get BFPs within 9 months'...:happydance:


----------



## kelly1973

we need some more bfp oh and i need a bump buddie x


----------



## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> we need some more bfp oh and i need a bump buddie x

I sure hope so Kelly :happydance:....wishing lots of BFPs so we can all join you :hugs:


----------



## greenjelly

Here I am Sara! Im sorry for having gone AWOL. Im so up and down about the whole baby thing, I kind of got fed up with thinking about "Am I, arent I"? It seems we BD'd at the right time this month but I didnt get a positive OPK (only used the cheapy sticks which have never really given me a positive.) And then my CM seems to have been all over the place each day so no helpful signs there. Had a really short cycle last month so not really sure what to expect this month. Too many variables! Dont feel pregnant in any way really except an odd pain in my right hip and side for about 30 mins yesterday morning. I wondered if that might be a sign of implantation but boobs not tender AT ALL despite me pressing them quite hard to check!

And work has been quite stressful recently, we are buying a new house so although I think that has actually been pretty smooth, it is still on my mind a lot. I probably drink wine too often (I did last night for instance despite my plans that I would stick to soft drinks) which makes me wonder about my dedication to the project. It will be about #12 of TTC for us too after this month which seems a long long time. Is a baby something I just have to accept might not happen? OH going for a sperm test next week (convuluted process and he is worried about having to get 'it' in a pot to a time and then drive the sample 40 mins to the hospital all within an hour!) and then I guess, if he passes, its back to me and maybe looking at my tubes. 
Sorry, Ive opened the flood gates! Sara, any news on the :witch:? Kelly, how are you feeling? Viccat, still relaxed? 
Apols again. I will try to keep more in touch. I have been lurking but not joining in. Which is bad. sorry. 
xxxx


----------



## greenjelly

Katherine1209 said:


> kelly1973 said:
> 
> 
> we need some more bfp oh and i need a bump buddie x
> 
> I sure hope so Kelly :happydance:....wishing lots of BFPs so we can all join you :hugs:Click to expand...

 Sorry Katherine, I left you off my message. How you doing? (to quote Joey Tribbiani) :winkwink:


----------



## Katherine1209

greenjelly said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> kelly1973 said:
> 
> 
> we need some more bfp oh and i need a bump buddie x
> 
> I sure hope so Kelly :happydance:....wishing lots of BFPs so we can all join you :hugs:Click to expand...
> 
> Sorry Katherine, I left you off my message. How you doing? (to quote Joey Tribbiani) :winkwink:Click to expand...




greenjelly said:


> Here I am Sara! Im sorry for having gone AWOL. Im so up and down about the whole baby thing, I kind of got fed up with thinking about "Am I, arent I"? It seems we BD'd at the right time this month but I didnt get a positive OPK (only used the cheapy sticks which have never really given me a positive.) And then my CM seems to have been all over the place each day so no helpful signs there. Had a really short cycle last month so not really sure what to expect this month. Too many variables! Dont feel pregnant in any way really except an odd pain in my right hip and side for about 30 mins yesterday morning. I wondered if that might be a sign of implantation but boobs not tender AT ALL despite me pressing them quite hard to check!
> 
> And work has been quite stressful recently, we are buying a new house so although I think that has actually been pretty smooth, it is still on my mind a lot. I probably drink wine too often (I did last night for instance despite my plans that I would stick to soft drinks) which makes me wonder about my dedication to the project. It will be about #12 of TTC for us too after this month which seems a long long time. Is a baby something I just have to accept might not happen? OH going for a sperm test next week (convuluted process and he is worried about having to get 'it' in a pot to a time and then drive the sample 40 mins to the hospital all within an hour!) and then I guess, if he passes, its back to me and maybe looking at my tubes.
> Sorry, Ive opened the flood gates! Sara, any news on the :witch:? Kelly, how are you feeling? Viccat, still relaxed?
> Apols again. I will try to keep more in touch. I have been lurking but not joining in. Which is bad. sorry.
> xxxx

Hi Green! I'm ok and can totally understand where your coming from...I would say not to give up hope....just see what happens...
I know it's frustrating and heartbreaking but it will be worth it... :hugs:
Don't feel pressured about us and the forum one bit, we will be here whenever you need us xx

As for me, I'm in the tww ATM, cd 16, don't feel any symptoms but did have some weird sharp pains in my right side yesterday


----------



## SaraJewel

greenjelly said:


> Here I am Sara! Im sorry for having gone AWOL. Im so up and down about the whole baby thing, I kind of got fed up with thinking about "Am I, arent I"? It seems we BD'd at the right time this month but I didnt get a positive OPK (only used the cheapy sticks which have never really given me a positive.) And then my CM seems to have been all over the place each day so no helpful signs there. Had a really short cycle last month so not really sure what to expect this month. Too many variables! Dont feel pregnant in any way really except an odd pain in my right hip and side for about 30 mins yesterday morning. I wondered if that might be a sign of implantation but boobs not tender AT ALL despite me pressing them quite hard to check!
> 
> And work has been quite stressful recently, we are buying a new house so although I think that has actually been pretty smooth, it is still on my mind a lot. I probably drink wine too often (I did last night for instance despite my plans that I would stick to soft drinks) which makes me wonder about my dedication to the project. It will be about #12 of TTC for us too after this month which seems a long long time. Is a baby something I just have to accept might not happen? OH going for a sperm test next week (convuluted process and he is worried about having to get 'it' in a pot to a time and then drive the sample 40 mins to the hospital all within an hour!) and then I guess, if he passes, its back to me and maybe looking at my tubes.
> Sorry, Ive opened the flood gates! Sara, any news on the :witch:? Kelly, how are you feeling? Viccat, still relaxed?
> Apols again. I will try to keep more in touch. I have been lurking but not joining in. Which is bad. sorry.
> xxxx

I'm glad you "opened the flood gates". A lot of what you said is very familiar. AF is just starting with me, got quite upset about it in front of OH, he said it was early days which I understand - even tho it's been nearly a year, it's only been the past few months when we've had regular sex successfully anywhere near the fertile period! I just hope getting upset in front of him won't trigger performance anxiety again. In any case we will be apart during the fertile period this month so no pressure. Maybe will do me good to have a month off.

I drink wine too often too. It is part of my lifestyle! But I know what you mean - if I was really dedicated I would go tee total. I too am wondering if not having a baby is something I need to accept too. I know everyone says you have to stay positive, but it's hard to put a lot of time and effort into something and keep failing over and over again. Maybe a combination of being positive and realistic at the same time?

Good like with OH test. We haven't gone for any tests yet, and haven't even discussed it as I think the Dr would say we need to have a good 6 months of proper trying (we've only had 3 I would say). If we have no joy in a few months I think that will be the next step for me and I will see what the doc says. 

As for the OPKs, I do wonder how reliable they are.......... but that's cos I've not had much success with them. I hope they are unreliable in my case rather than showing that I'm not ovulating.

And finally, if you find taking part on here too much, feel free to lurk. Most times I find this forum REALLY supportive, but at other times it just fuels my obsessions so not a good idea at times. 

It is good to hear from you. Let us know how OH gets on if you would like to share, if not, feel free to lurk!

SJ :hugs::hugs::hugs:


----------



## Katherine1209

:hugs:


----------



## greenjelly

Awwww, you guys. :thumbup: thank you. Katherine I think I am CD21 today and I am lucky in that I have a pretty short cycle so at least I will know pretty soon either way. As I say, no symptoms so I wont be very surprised if/when AF turns up. Sara, I am so sorry to hear of your experience. Do you think your OH was surprised by how upset you were? I just think getting the timing right is so tricky. As I said, so many variables - they say day 1 of period is full flow but that is quite hard to judge sometimes I find, and then knowing when ovulation is happening. If you dont use sticks that often, you could miss the surge, counting 14 days back from last period to see when ovulation might have occurred last month and hoping you hit the right time this month. 
And the drinking thing, a bit of me feels if it is meant to be, it will happen whatever and what difference can a little bit of alcohol make? But then you read other posts about women giving up alcohol (and lots of other things that are vaguely fun it seems) and then recommending that as a route to pregnancy. A friend of mine stopped drinking and ate more healthily and lost loads of weight and has gone on to have twins (albeit by IVF) so she was really motivated to the cause. I ate about 7 Hobnobs and the OH and me shared a big packet of Cheesey Balls - that was our breakfast today. Not exactly healthy eating is it!! 
Sara, I had a bloodtest last December and then a 'probe' about 5 months and both of those suggest I am ovulating but that doesnt necessarily mean the egg is getting through does it? The GP suggested the next thing for me is to check my tubes which I hear might not be a very pleasant experience. My OH will be 50 next year. He has had children before so his 'men' were working once upon a time but 18 years on... is everything working as it should? For him and then for me?! 
Well done for your philosophical attitude Sara. Are you really ok with there being no chance for BDing next month? How open do you think your OH would be to go for tests? 
Thanks again girls. Your messages touched me. :kiss:


----------



## viccat

greenjelly said:


> And work has been quite stressful recently, we are buying a new house so although I think that has actually been pretty smooth, it is still on my mind a lot. I probably drink wine too often (I did last night for instance despite my plans that I would stick to soft drinks) which makes me wonder about my dedication to the project. It will be about #12 of TTC for us too after this month which seems a long long time. Is a baby something I just have to accept might not happen? OH going for a sperm test next week (convuluted process and he is worried about having to get 'it' in a pot to a time and then drive the sample 40 mins to the hospital all within an hour!) and then I guess, if he passes, its back to me and maybe looking at my tubes.
> Sorry, Ive opened the flood gates! Sara, any news on the :witch:? Kelly, how are you feeling? Viccat, still relaxed?
> Apols again. I will try to keep more in touch. I have been lurking but not joining in. Which is bad. sorry.
> xxxx

Don't worry about joining in! I have spells when I am in the mood, and others when I just feel a bit :nope:

I wonder about the wine too, and was planning on giving up, but somehow needed a relaxing glass of red after my teetotal holiday week. It is only ever a glass (or two, if we're out for dinner) but it happens a bit too often. 

I am also thinking about trying to cut down on caffeine. I keep forgetting though and putting the kettle on! :dohh: So...... I've got my fruity tea bags and fresh juice ready for the weeks ahead.



SaraJewel said:


> Good like with OH test. We haven't gone for any tests yet, and haven't even discussed it as I think the Dr would say we need to have a good 6 months of proper trying (we've only had 3 I would say). If we have no joy in a few months I think that will be the next step for me and I will see what the doc says.

Oooo I am in the exact same position. I reckon there have only realistically been 2 or maybe 3, months when we've actually DTD anywhere near the right time. So I am giving it another 3 months and a lot of determination, CoQ10, fruity tea bags, mooncup, pestering and fail-safe lingerie. :winkwink:


----------



## SaraJewel

greenjelly said:


> Awwww, you guys. :thumbup: thank you. Katherine I think I am CD21 today and I am lucky in that I have a pretty short cycle so at least I will know pretty soon either way. As I say, no symptoms so I wont be very surprised if/when AF turns up. Sara, I am so sorry to hear of your experience. Do you think your OH was surprised by how upset you were? I just think getting the timing right is so tricky. As I said, so many variables - they say day 1 of period is full flow but that is quite hard to judge sometimes I find, and then knowing when ovulation is happening. If you dont use sticks that often, you could miss the surge, counting 14 days back from last period to see when ovulation might have occurred last month and hoping you hit the right time this month.
> And the drinking thing, a bit of me feels if it is meant to be, it will happen whatever and what difference can a little bit of alcohol make? But then you read other posts about women giving up alcohol (and lots of other things that are vaguely fun it seems) and then recommending that as a route to pregnancy. A friend of mine stopped drinking and ate more healthily and lost loads of weight and has gone on to have twins (albeit by IVF) so she was really motivated to the cause. I ate about 7 Hobnobs and the OH and me shared a big packet of Cheesey Balls - that was our breakfast today. Not exactly healthy eating is it!!
> Sara, I had a bloodtest last December and then a 'probe' about 5 months and both of those suggest I am ovulating but that doesnt necessarily mean the egg is getting through does it? The GP suggested the next thing for me is to check my tubes which I hear might not be a very pleasant experience. My OH will be 50 next year. He has had children before so his 'men' were working once upon a time but 18 years on... is everything working as it should? For him and then for me?!
> Well done for your philosophical attitude Sara. Are you really ok with there being no chance for BDing next month? How open do you think your OH would be to go for tests?
> Thanks again girls. Your messages touched me. :kiss:

Hey, I don't know if he was surprised or not but I think it took him a bit off guard. I know what you mean about deciding when is CD1. I usually have a few days of spotting before AF so count CD1 as when need to use tampon if that helps. 

Your breakfast made me laugh! Sounds yummy. 

A couple of my friends have had tubes checked, and I think it wasn't their favourite thing but not the worst thing ever either.

As for no BD-ing chance next month, I think it will do me good to have a month off. I know it's another month gone by, but today I feel so worn down by it all I think it's a blessing. I don't know how OH would be apart from totally terrified of the results. How about yours? Is he OK with it? I don't even know if mine would agree to it, but then what is the point of going at it all the time when you might not even be in the mood, when there is no chance of conception???? I think it's better to know, then we would be able to get on with our lives and stop dwelling on the whole thing (sounds easy when you say it like that, but would be awful).

Like I say, feeling a bit worn down but sure will perk up soon. Thought of work tomorrow is quite horrendous but sure will keep my mind off things.

SJ x


----------



## greenjelly

Im a Mooncup girl these days so I pop it in as soon as I think AF is settling in. It's harder to work out when full flow kicks in! 
I dont want to go to work either. :nope: Weekends fly by far too fast. I will think of you! Only 5 days and its another weekend! 

Hope its not too bad. 

xxxx


----------



## Katherine1209

greenjelly said:


> Awwww, you guys. :thumbup: thank you. Katherine I think I am CD21 today and I am lucky in that I have a pretty short cycle so at least I will know pretty soon either way. As I say, no symptoms so I wont be very surprised if/when AF turns up.
> 
> And the drinking thing, a bit of me feels if it is meant to be, it will happen whatever and what difference can a little bit of alcohol make? But then you read other posts about women giving up alcohol (and lots of other things that are vaguely fun it seems) and then recommending that as a route to pregnancy. A friend of mine stopped drinking and ate more healthily and lost loads of weight and has gone on to have twins (albeit by IVF) so she was really motivated to the cause. I ate about 7 Hobnobs and the OH and me shared a big packet of Cheesey Balls - that was our breakfast today. Not exactly healthy eating is it!!

Green! I laughed as I read your breakfast menu as I munch on a bag of marshmallows :rofl:

I heard that the tube 'flushing' is not bad at all, I made that term up btw as I don't remember the technical term :haha: 

And part of really agrees with the 'if it's meant to happen' thing....it might sound selfish but I don't want to put all my pleasures on hold (wine, chocolate, lollies, junk food...the list goes on...Mmmmm think I am sounding a bit food crazed :wacko:....in the hope I might get pg...how long do I have do I do that, might be a long time...and I still have a life outside of ttc...it is a priority for me and OH but it's not everything...


----------



## Katherine1209

Sara and Green...I don't want to go to work either...I don't think I can bear to meet with another teen pregnant mum addicted to drugs who couldn't give two shits about her babies....or do another pregnancy test that is a BFP and they don't want to have it....hate my job today.....:nope:


----------



## Katherine1209

And I didn't even know about the cd 1 and the heavy flow thing! I've always counted from the first day of bleeding even though my day 2 is much heavier


----------



## HPMINI

I think with the CBFM it suggests that you use FMU to test so if you start bleeding during the day/evening/night - CD1 is the next morning.


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> Sara and Green...I don't want to go to work either...I don't think I can bear to meet with another teen pregnant mum addicted to drugs who couldn't give two shits about her babies....or do another pregnancy test that is a BFP and they don't want to have it....hate my job today.....:nope:

Oh hun ..... that sounds rotten ...... I don't think I could do that job, so kudos to you for giving your time over to people like that. :hugs:


----------



## kelly1973

hi ladies sorry you are feeling down big snuggle bums to you all xx as for the drinking thing on the month we got a bfp i really thought i was out and was drinking at 10 dpo and i got my bfp on 11 dpo wasnt happy with myself but without sounding like an alchy i bloody needed a drink at times.

green hey lovely weve all missed you but here for you when you need us it does take over your life and endless bfn would destroy me each month but have faith xx

afm been on the sofa for nearly 3 days feeling terible i have a phobia of being sick and at times i have come close i feel dreadful and cant eat a thing but hope this is a good thing have my scan on the 14 th so a little nervous about that


----------



## Katherine1209

viccat said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Sara and Green...I don't want to go to work either...I don't think I can bear to meet with another teen pregnant mum addicted to drugs who couldn't give two shits about her babies....or do another pregnancy test that is a BFP and they don't want to have it....hate my job today.....:nope:
> 
> Oh hun ..... that sounds rotten ...... I don't think I could do that job, so kudos to you for giving your time over to people like that. :hugs:Click to expand...

Thanks hon...it's not always that bad...just a bad day...most of my clients are pretty amazing :thumbup:


----------



## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> hi ladies sorry you are feeling down big snuggle bums to you all xx as for the drinking thing on the month we got a bfp i really thought i was out and was drinking at 10 dpo and i got my bfp on 11 dpo wasnt happy with myself but without sounding like an alchy i bloody needed a drink at times.
> 
> green hey lovely weve all missed you but here for you when you need us it does take over your life and endless bfn would destroy me each month but have faith xx
> 
> afm been on the sofa for nearly 3 days feeling terible i have a phobia of being sick and at times i have come close i feel dreadful and cant eat a thing but hope this is a good thing have my scan on the 14 th so a little nervous about that

Hey Kelly, so excited for you, having your scan soon...can't wait to hear how it went :happydance::happydance:
Sorry to hear your feeling crap :hugs::hugs:


----------



## greenjelly

Cor yes, Katherine what is your job? Are the people you work aware that you are TTC or do you have to keep it secret? Im quite blase about it at work. Recently lots of girls seem to be on maternity leave so Im wondering if there is a particular chair I should sit on! 
I POAS this morning. Im CD22 (not sure how many after ov) and AF is due in about 3 days so I wasnt really expecting anything to show up. I even asked myself out loud why am i doing this test? its stupid. OH going for sperm test next week and I suppose I was hoping I could announce he doesnt have to go now! It was only a very cheapy PG stick so I dont feel I have wasted money. Just feel Ive let myself down on the will power front. I should be able to wait until at least CD25. 
Kelly, sorry to hear you are feeling so rough. Being sick is never nice but does this not feel different because you know the reason? (not alcohol induced!)
Its good to hear you lot all eat and drink things we know arent good for us. Its true, we have to carry on having a life. We could give up all fun things and it still not happen. 
Sara, hope you made it through Monday ok! 
xxxx


----------



## Katherine1209

greenjelly said:


> Cor yes, Katherine what is your job? Are the people you work aware that you are TTC or do you have to keep it secret? Im quite blase about it at work. Recently lots of girls seem to be on maternity leave so Im wondering if there is a particular chair I should sit on!
> I POAS this morning. Im CD22 (not sure how many after ov) and AF is due in about 3 days so I wasnt really expecting anything to show up. I even asked myself out loud why am i doing this test? its stupid. OH going for sperm test next week and I suppose I was hoping I could announce he doesnt have to go now! It was only a very cheapy PG stick so I dont feel I have wasted money. Just feel Ive let myself down on the will power front. I should be able to wait until at least CD25.

I'm a social worker at a youth health centre...12 to 25 year olds....I do mostly counseling but run groups there too....cooking, art, parenting etc.
Most of the staff know...I'm pretty open about...like "need to go home for lunch today, I'm ovulating!" that kind of thing :rofl: :rofl:
I've only told a few of my longer term clients, the ones I trust a bit and can be more open with...
Don't give yourself a hard time about testing early, it's hard enough getting a bfn, even when we know we should hold out...we've all done it :wacko:


----------



## Katherine1209

How is everyone?


----------



## greenjelly

Hello Katherine, thanks for asking. Im good. Working at home and watching the Olympics - and its a lovely sunny day here. Ive been out for lunch with my parents (dont tell work although I am catching up now...) so all in all very nice. Maybe dont ask me tomorrow as AF due then... keep thinking maybe, maybe but think it's unlikely really. 
Still, complete on our new house on Tuesday so thats something to look forward to! How you are Katherine? :flower:


----------



## kelly1973

hey you guys lovely day here too was wondering what the sun looked like lol


----------



## viccat

I'm sat in a hotel room in a hot and excitable London town. I really wished I had tried to get a ticket for tonight's athletics - watching the 200m final on tv instead.

Charting and getting ready for the key TTC 7 days over the next week. :coffee:


----------



## greenjelly

How come you are in a hotel Viccat? Im quite happy watching on TV. I dont have to worry about getting home later and I have a toilet and drinks close to hand! Good luck next week!


----------



## janey211

Ladies,

I have been reading your posts and must say, they have helped me so much. My situation is similar but a little worse. My husband is actually NEVER able to "finish". I am 38 (soon turning 39) and have been trying for 4 months. We have gone the insemination route. It takes so much pressure off us and I know I will get his boys where they need to be all the time. However, no luck so far. We have started blood work and my numbers are coming back low and suggest no ovulation. However, I have had a least 3 very positive OPK's and all typical ovulation symptoms. So who knows what is happening. I have recently lost 35 pounds but need to lose another 50. So, I really feel this is all my fault and weight related. I have a very social lifestyle which includes cocktails and have made the decision that I need to change my habits pronto. I can't change my age/egg quality but I can change my body and what I do. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not going cold turkey but I can put a dent it the drinking for sure. I am starting supplements and I am on a good eating plan. So I guess it's a start. I am on CD 8 and will start my testing again tomorrow... Let the roller coaster begin again!!!!!!!!! Good luck to everyone and I hope you don't mind me joining in. Friends are OK to talk to but really have NO idea what this feels like. My mind had played so many tricks on me it is crazy. I am seeing lines that don't exist, have symptoms that don't pan out...staring to feel like a nut bag.


----------



## Katherine1209

greenjelly said:


> Hello Katherine, thanks for asking. Im good. Working at home and watching the Olympics - and its a lovely sunny day here. Ive been out for lunch with my parents (dont tell work although I am catching up now...) so all in all very nice. Maybe dont ask me tomorrow as AF due then... keep thinking maybe, maybe but think it's unlikely really.
> Still, complete on our new house on Tuesday so thats something to look forward to! How you are Katherine? :flower:

Cool here today, its winter in adelaide..I'm having the day off from work today...yay!
A new house is exciting!

I tested again today, another bfn! It's only 8or9 dpo though...still hopeful for us! A friend of mine on another thread just got her BFP and she had no symptoms at all....so fx!

Hi viccat and Kelly, thinking of you guys x


----------



## greenjelly

What you going to do with your day off Katherine? Its a lovely day here in England. I however, think AF is on her way. Had some intermittant tummy ache last night but convinced myself they werent like period pains but this morning the pain is much more constant and does seem to remind me of the familiar monthly feelings. I thought I might be in with a shot this month. :nope::nope:Onto September....


----------



## Katherine1209

Not up to much, just went to the market and catching up on some house work...
Don't give up hope yet green! :hugs:


----------



## greenjelly

Hope has gone Katherine! The :witch: arrived today. Bang on schedule which I am grateful for. At least, I didnt get far along the "late period" thinking. So onto September. And you know what they say (apparently), new house, new baby. We will have to christen every room! :haha:
Hi Janey. Welcome aboard. Well done with the weight loss so far. Sounds impressive. What kind of insemination technique have you been using? (is it ok to ask that?). DIY with a syringe (we have done that) or done by a professional? Are you going for your first baby?


----------



## janey211

Green....at home with Syringe. Not the fun way to do things but otherwise it wouldn't happen. I never minded this issue before now. Saved me lots of $$ on BC. He feels so bad but he has ALWAYS had the issue with all women. So I know it isn't me. It's totally mental. Yes, this is our first.
Still waiting to hear from my doctor on my FSH level's. Nervous about that for sure.
Sorry to hear :witch:arrived. I know the dissappointment it brings. I had myself convinced this time last week. Hang in there.:thumbup:


----------



## viccat

Hey all, lots of posts to catch up on!

:hi: Hi janey and welcome. You seem so calm about the artificial insemination - I am in awe of you! As for the drinking, you're in good company :winkwink: and I'm sure each small healthy choice adds up. I get a gold star for only drinking cups of tea this evening, even though it is a Friday night!

Sorry about the :witch: green. It's definitely the low point in the month, so :hugs: 

(I was in a hotel room because I was in London for a couple of day's with work)

I'm keeping my fingers crossed Katherine!


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi janey! My OH and I have done the syringe too! Better to at least have a chance hey! And I feel as if 'whatever works'!!
Green, so sorry to hear about af! Damn it! Hopeful for your September cycle hon :hugs: 
Viccat, well done on the tea drinking...I'm going out for a dinner in the city tonight, so have to be good in terms of wine!! 
4 days til af due and still a bfn this morning....hope is dwindling, but still holding out for a miracle :shrug:


----------



## SaraJewel

Hi all,

welcome Janey, glad you can join us. I had 6 months without OH finishing, but different issue as he did manage fine before TTC (well, occasionally not but not all the time). I was thinking of syringes before things started to improve so am glad he has agreed to that and you are in with a chance. I was completely distraught when there was no chance at all and I am not so sure my OH would have agreed to the syringe method.

Viccat, nice to hear from you. Good luck with BD-ing this month.

Green, that sucks about AF coming. Keep strong and fingers crossed for Sept.

Kath, fingers crossed AF stays away.

Kelly, how are things? Have you had a scan?

I am not in with a chance this month as we are apart during fertile period so having a rest from TTC. Good to have a bit of a breather. Will keep fingers crossed for the rest of you :)


----------



## Katherine1209

I have some slight af like cramps.....praying it's not the :witch: coming....don't let it be her....:cry:


----------



## greenjelly

Stay away from Katherine you :witch: 
Im feeling pretty crummy. Back ache giving me grief and periods are just so horribly gunky. There is no redeeming factor about a period except I suppose (I am trying to look on the bright side) it's good to know they do happen regularly from a TTC point of view. 
We have done the syringe a few times. I know my OH isnt that keen on it and it doesnt particularly give him a great thrill but its good to know the 'output' is being put to good use! Im starting to wonder if I ovulate much later than I think I do. If Im on a 25 day cycle, I cant ovulate as late as CD17 can I? Didnt have much luck with sticks this month - just thinking back to twinges I had. Could they have been OV pains? I was remembering a time when I didnt dissect every single pain I got. They were lovely times! 
Sara, nice to see you here. Glad you are feeling positive about your breathing space. 
Yes, Kelly any update? 
Shall we all try not to drink any/much alcohol this month? Is that just going to far??


----------



## viccat

Hey green,

From what I understand it would be unlikely that you would ovulate that late but only have a 25 day cycle. That is because your luteal phase should stay the same every month, and is on average about 14 days long.

So if you don't normally ovulate that late, then your cycle would also be longer .... if I am understanding it properly.

I have started temping this month (after resisting doing so for the first 6 cycles!) as apparently the temperature raise is the only DIY way of confirming that you have ovulated. All going smoothly so far .... now all I've got to do is seduce OH :haha:

I am already really trying to cut down the alcohol this month, so I would love to have company! My last drink was Monday evening, so 5 days and counting :happydance:


----------



## Katherine1209

greenjelly said:


> Stay away from Katherine you :witch:
> Im feeling pretty crummy. Back ache giving me grief and periods are just so horribly gunky. There is no redeeming factor about a period except I suppose (I am trying to look on the bright side) it's good to know they do happen regularly from a TTC point of view.
> We have done the syringe a few times. I know my OH isnt that keen on it and it doesnt particularly give him a great thrill but its good to know the 'output' is being put to good use! Im starting to wonder if I ovulate much later than I think I do. If Im on a 25 day cycle, I cant ovulate as late as CD17 can I? Didnt have much luck with sticks this month - just thinking back to twinges I had. Could they have been OV pains? I was remembering a time when I didnt dissect every single pain I got. They were lovely times!
> Sara, nice to see you here. Glad you are feeling positive about your breathing space.
> Yes, Kelly any update?
> Shall we all try not to drink any/much alcohol this month? Is that just going to far??

Thanks hon, I so hope it isn't her! :cry:
Hope you're feeling a bit less crappy....hate that witch!

I'd think you would ov around cd11...do you OPK that early? I have a bit of trouble with my OPK and not being sure it is a positive result or not...started keeping all they tests and comparing them in a line..:wacko: seems to be easier to see the change from darker to lighter...as I don't really ever see a very obviously dark second line...

Oh yes, the days before we read things into every twinge, despite the fact it's probably more what I'm eating... :rofl: 

Hi Sara... :wave:
Hi viccat, hope you get lots of BDing :happydance:
Yes, I'm willing to join the no/low alcohol, had my last wine on Saturday night...savoured it :haha:


----------



## viccat

Feeling hopeful today :flower: This morning we DTD before getting up, and when I did my lovely monitor said peak, so timing is definitely improving! I am a bit worried because with it being morning, there was no chance to stay still, so those swimmers had better be good :winkwink:

I'm still not sure when I actually ovulate, so will keep going with the temping/charting because that is the missing part of the jigsaw for me.


----------



## Katherine1209

Glad to hear things are looking so positive for you viccat!

My days been mixed today. Came home early from work as feeling crappy and got another bfn this morning....did a collage and feel a bit more hopeful


----------



## janey211

Hello Ladies.


I just started temping and it is so annoying. I always get up to use the bathroom then remember to take the temp. My temps seem to be all over the place so not sure this is working for me. 
I use the internet cheapie OPK's then when I think it is positive, I use a first response to be sure. If I interpret the lines to match then get a smiley face, I feel pretty good. Just a tip so you feel confident that your interpretation was correct. I test 2x a day at 11am and then at 7pm from CD 9 and on. I think my timing was good at least 3 out of these 4 months.

As far as the insemination thing goes, the doctor said that technically it should work (that was an ackward conversion to have with her:wacko:). As long as there is semen there and they can swim, it should work. 

So, I went all last week without drinking (even friday night) then went out to dinner on Saturday and had wine...and a cocktail:nope:. I figure that is a great improvment from my typical 3 days a week :drunk:

But I am abstaining this week as well so you all have a sober buddy!! 

On another note, I had a dream that my best friend who has 2 kids and her husband has been snipped was pregnant. I exploded in anger at her in the dream and stormed out of her house. What is my subconscience doing to me? 
Anyway, good luck to everyone and I hope for good news for you all!!!


----------



## Katherine1209

janey211 said:


> Hello Ladies.
> 
> 
> I just started temping and it is so annoying. I always get up to use the bathroom then remember to take the temp. My temps seem to be all over the place so not sure this is working for me.
> I use the internet cheapie OPK's then when I think it is positive, I use a first response to be sure. If I interpret the lines to match then get a smiley face, I feel pretty good. Just a tip so you feel confident that your interpretation was correct. I test 2x a day at 11am and then at 7pm from CD 9 and on. I think my timing was good at least 3 out of these 4 months.
> 
> As far as the insemination thing goes, the doctor said that technically it should work (that was an ackward conversion to have with her:wacko:). As long as there is semen there and they can swim, it should work.
> 
> So, I went all last week without drinking (even friday night) then went out to dinner on Saturday and had wine...and a cocktail:nope:. I figure that is a great improvment from my typical 3 days a week :drunk:
> 
> But I am abstaining this week as well so you all have a sober buddy!!
> 
> On another note, I had a dream that my best friend who has 2 kids and her husband has been snipped was pregnant. I exploded in anger at her in the dream and stormed out of her house. What is my subconscience doing to me?
> Anyway, good luck to everyone and I hope for good news for you all!!!

I think you have temp before getting out of bed or the results are inaccurate...I don't temp cause I wouldn't remember either :haha:

Thanks for you advice on the opk's. I think I might get a saliva microscope as a couple of my friends with kids swear by it for accurate results...not sure if it shows before or after ov though... Have to look into that more...

I'm 13 dpo and all my pg tests have been BFNs. Only a glimmer of hope held out, trying not to think about the :witch:


----------



## Hortensia

Hi Ladies 

Hope you don't mind me joining on the thread. My OH and I have this 'issue' a bit. We have a happy & close relationship but neither of us has a massively high sex drive and I'm always amazed by posters (especially in the over 35s thread) talking about BD'ing 5 times in a week!!! a couple or few times a month is good for us, and when stressed with work or such it generally doesn't happen. This is completely normal for us, but sometimes I feel like a freak.

I'm 39 (40 in April) and feel like it's last chance saloon. Having said that, most of the time I manage to keep it in perspective with a 'if it's meant to be, it's meant to be' attitude. But I feel the pressure more than I would if we were having masses of sex. 

Managed to BD in a fertile window this cycle and I'm currently about 8-9 days p.o. I think. Don't feel a lot different to usually post -ov feelings so I'm not holding out a lot of hope, especially since its the first time we've managed to BD in a fertile window for ages... 

Anyway, the best of luck to all ladies on this thread. :dust:Glad I'm on the forum after lurking for ages :)


----------



## janey211

Katherine,

any sympton's she is coming?


----------



## Katherine1209

Nothing yet janey, but not usual for me....most of the time I get cramps on cd2...
Did another pg test this morning...another bfn! 
14dpo tomorrow and have one more test saved for then....fingers crossed...:af: and a :bfp:


----------



## Katherine1209

Hortensia said:


> Hi Ladies
> 
> Hope you don't mind me joining on the thread. My OH and I have this 'issue' a bit. We have a happy & close relationship but neither of us has a massively high sex drive and I'm always amazed by posters (especially in the over 35s thread) talking about BD'ing 5 times in a week!!! a couple or few times a month is good for us, and when stressed with work or such it generally doesn't happen. This is completely normal for us, but sometimes I feel like a freak.
> 
> I'm 39 (40 in April) and feel like it's last chance saloon. Having said that, most of the time I manage to keep it in perspective with a 'if it's meant to be, it's meant to be' attitude. But I feel the pressure more than I would if we were having masses of sex.
> 
> Managed to BD in a fertile window this cycle and I'm currently about 8-9 days p.o. I think. Don't feel a lot different to usually post -ov feelings so I'm not holding out a lot of hope, especially since its the first time we've managed to BD in a fertile window for ages...
> 
> Anyway, the best of luck to all ladies on this thread. :dust:Glad I'm on the forum after lurking for ages :)

Hi H! Nice to hear from you...my oh and I are similar to you guys, although I'd say my sex drive is higher than his...if he's stressed it's the last thing on his mind...even if I'm ov....a bit frustrating for me...whereas when I'm stressed I usually want to BD more...go figure!

Fingers crossed for you this cycle...have you been ttc long?


----------



## Hortensia

Hi Katherine, 

We've been NTNP since last year, but I was abroad for work for six months earlier this year, and what with other stresses like moving house, new jobs etc. it's not been high on our list of priorities! We're a bit more settled now so I'm hoping that will help. I do think stress can play a big part. 

Currently in the TWW but I've been here before, so I'm feeling a lot more rational about it :haha:

Thing is, I've never been pregnant (always careful to the point of paranoia!) so it's completely unknown territory.

How about you? Have you been TCC long? I've lurked on this forum for ages, and it's encouraging to see some of the other ladies who've had a long wait finally get their BFPs :happydance:


----------



## Katherine1209

Hortensia said:


> Hi Katherine,
> 
> We've been NTNP since last year, but I was abroad for work for six months earlier this year, and what with other stresses like moving house, new jobs etc. it's not been high on our list of priorities! We're a bit more settled now so I'm hoping that will help. I do think stress can play a big part.
> 
> Currently in the TWW but I've been here before, so I'm feeling a lot more rational about it :haha:
> 
> Thing is, I've never been pregnant (always careful to the point of paranoia!) so it's completely unknown territory.
> 
> How about you? Have you been TCC long? I've lurked on this forum for ages, and it's encouraging to see some of the other ladies who've had a long wait finally get their BFPs :happydance:

We've been ntnp since late last year, but not really trying much...lol
It's been 5 months of opk's and the last two months my oh has really been trying to DTD in the ov window....twice this cycle on cd12 and 14...I have a 28 day cycle usually...He sometimes has trouble 'ending' which I find a bit frustrating, sometimes I get upset but i try not to let him know as I know he's trying...

I have been pg before...long before...my dd is 19 now! Not sure if i can even get pg after so long....:haha: its so funny ttc when I too was so responsible around contraception...especially after the surprise of getting pregnant last time..

I never thought I would have anymore kids but since I met my oh I've totally changed my mind...I sooooo have my heart set on having a baby and becoming parents with him...In fact we would love two


----------



## janey211

Welcome H! This is a great site for venting and sharing information! stress is a killer to the process so good news you are settled in!

Katherine, Keep us posted! no symptoms is a good sign:thumbup:


----------



## Hortensia

Katherine1209 said:


> Hortensia said:
> 
> 
> Hi Katherine,
> 
> We've been NTNP since last year, but I was abroad for work for six months earlier this year, and what with other stresses like moving house, new jobs etc. it's not been high on our list of priorities! We're a bit more settled now so I'm hoping that will help. I do think stress can play a big part.
> 
> Currently in the TWW but I've been here before, so I'm feeling a lot more rational about it :haha:
> 
> Thing is, I've never been pregnant (always careful to the point of paranoia!) so it's completely unknown territory.
> 
> How about you? Have you been TCC long? I've lurked on this forum for ages, and it's encouraging to see some of the other ladies who've had a long wait finally get their BFPs :happydance:
> 
> We've been ntnp since late last year, but not really trying much...lol
> It's been 5 months of opk's and the last two months my oh has really been trying to DTD in the ov window....twice this cycle on cd12 and 14...I have a 28 day cycle usually...He sometimes has trouble 'ending' which I find a bit frustrating, sometimes I get upset but i try not to let him know as I know he's trying...
> 
> I have been pg before...long before...my dd is 19 now! Not sure if i can even get pg after so long....:haha: its so funny ttc when I too was so responsible around contraception...especially after the surprise of getting pregnant last time..
> 
> I never thought I would have anymore kids but since I met my oh I've totally changed my mind...I sooooo have my heart set on having a baby and becoming parents with him...In fact we would love twoClick to expand...

I completely understand about wanting a child with your new partner. I have had previous relationships where it hasn't been an option, really, because the relationship hasn't been great. But with my current OH it's a whole different story. 

Also about the not finishing, we've experienced this. I've taken the attitude of avoiding saying anything that might put pressure on him, since that just makes everything worse. I'm also trying to adopt a policy of not letting him know where I am in my cycle, and if it happens it happens. I did charting for a while last year but it made me hyper-conscious of what was going on and then slightly bonkers during the TWW. I might start with OPKs if nothing happens within a few cycles. 

A close friend of mine just got pregnant at age 39 after nearly two years of NTNP, she was stunned! It is difficult to relax about it though. :loopy:


----------



## viccat

Hi Hortensia :hi: You sound in a similar position to me. If we do it more than a couple of times a month, that is a busy month for us! We are however very cuddly, and I am thankful that he'll be totally fine after childbirth (fingers crossed we reach that point) if I'm not in the mood.

Like Kath, I probably have the higher drive during the prime baby-making week, and that's the only time it causes friction. It did even before TTC, and I am even worse now. He is stepping up to the mark though, bless him :winkwink:

Kath - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you :thumbup:

As for me, need to DTD tonight I reckon - CD14, temperature still low, and monitor says go for it. Watch out hubby! :happydance:


----------



## kelly1973

this thread moves fast hey ladies just checking in to say had my scan all measuring to date 7+3 and saw a lovely heartbeat. there was a young girl that went in before me and she came out crying my heart really went out to her. hope your all well hugs to you all


----------



## Katherine1209

I'm out. :witch: just arrived...:cry:


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> I'm out. :witch: just arrived...:cry:

Awww Katherine, sorry to hear that :hugs: this is just the shittyest part of the month isn't it?

Hi kelly - I am so pleased that your first scan went okay and you got to see that precious heartbeat. Fingers crossed you can relax a little bit now and that the rest goes so smoothly.

As for me, I managed to seduce OH last night - which means we have just beaten our previous personal best by DTD twice in 36 hours :haha: I am a much happier and relaxed bunny as a result.

However, I had a disturbed night's sleep and am not sure whether my temperature this morning is correct or not. :dohh: At 7am it was in line with pre-ovulation, which means I need to jump OH again! At 8am it was 0.2 degrees higher which would suggest post-ovulation. :shrug:


----------



## Hortensia

viccat said:


> Hi Hortensia :hi: You sound in a similar position to me. If we do it more than a couple of times a month, that is a busy month for us! We are however very cuddly, and I am thankful that he'll be totally fine after childbirth (fingers crossed we reach that point) if I'm not in the mood.
> 
> Like Kath, I probably have the higher drive during the prime baby-making week, and that's the only time it causes friction. It did even before TTC, and I am even worse now. He is stepping up to the mark though, bless him :winkwink:
> 
> Kath - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you :thumbup:
> 
> As for me, need to DTD tonight I reckon - CD14, temperature still low, and monitor says go for it. Watch out hubby! :happydance:

Hi viccat, 

My OH is probably even keener on having a baby than I am at this point, it must be said, so he's very with the programme. We'll see if that translates to actually BDing more though!! :haha:

Fx for you this cycle too :)


----------



## Hortensia

Katherine1209 said:


> I'm out. :witch: just arrived...:cry:

Sorry to hear that Katherine. I caved this morning and did a cheapie test which of course was :bfn:

It's a bit early to test, but even so I feel I'm out this month. I'm just having the usual premenstrual symptoms, and AF due next Monday. 

Roll on the next cycle?


----------



## Katherine1209

kelly1973 said:


> this thread moves fast hey ladies just checking in to say had my scan all measuring to date 7+3 and saw a lovely heartbeat. there was a young girl that went in before me and she came out crying my heart really went out to her. hope your all well hugs to you all

So happy to hear about your scan Kelly..:hugs:


----------



## Katherine1209

viccat said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> I'm out. :witch: just arrived...:cry:
> 
> Awww Katherine, sorry to hear that :hugs: this is just the shittyest part of the month isn't it?
> 
> As for me, I managed to seduce OH last night - which means we have just beaten our previous personal best by DTD twice in 36 hours :haha: I am a much happier and relaxed bunny as a result.
> 
> However, I had a disturbed night's sleep and am not sure whether my temperature this morning is correct or not. :dohh: At 7am it was in line with pre-ovulation, which means I need to jump OH again! At 8am it was 0.2 degrees higher which would suggest post-ovulation. :shrug:Click to expand...

Hi viccat! Mmmmm...it does suck! Dusting myself off and ready for the next cycle!!

Twice in 36, I'm envious :happydance::happydance:

In terms of tempting I thought for accuracy you need to take it at about the same time everyday,before you get out of bed, as any activity can alter the temp...I'd probably put more faith in the digital

Just in case though give the seduction another go :haha:

Fx for you xx


----------



## Katherine1209

Hortensia said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> I'm out. :witch: just arrived...:cry:
> 
> Sorry to hear that Katherine. I caved this morning and did a cheapie test which of course was :bfn:
> 
> It's a bit early to test, but even so I feel I'm out this month. I'm just having the usual premenstrual symptoms, and AF due next Monday.
> 
> Roll on the next cycle?Click to expand...

Don't give up hope til you know af is here...I know women who didn't get a positive result until 14dpo...and had no symptoms....still have my fx'd for you

If she comes though, I'll be here too...lol...another fun filled cycle :wacko:


----------



## greenjelly

Awww Katherine, so sorry to hear AF has arrived. Its a right blow innit? Here's to September. 
Hello Hortensia and Janey! Welcome aboard the good ship "OH Performance Anxiety". 
My OH is less keen on a baby than I am (it would be my first but his 5th...) but thankfully he has a higher sex drive than I do so he is pretty much always up for it. He too has trouble 'finishing' sometimes though. Funny isnt it, when you are young you believe a bloke 'comes' at the barest touch. it really isnt true. At least, not once they get a bit older. I get into the whole sex thing after a little while but its so much easier to just settle down and go to sleep. I have to go to Glasgow tomorrow for 3 days which crosses my fertile window slightly. Very annoying. I get back late on Sunday and think I will have to jump OH's bones upon my return. Or else give up on September too. I cant believe how quickly this year has gone already. If we dont BD this month, its onto October... Scary stuff! 
Hello Kelly! Great to hear about your scan. How are you feeling? 
Viccat, Ive never temped so I cant offer any advice. Glad to hear you have been active though! 
Sara, you ok? xxxxx


----------



## Hortensia

Hi Greenjelly :hi:

Yes, it's funny the things you find out when you're older, like the fact that all men aren't raging sex beasts, and that you won't get pregnant just by looking at a man! 

I think it would have been more relaxed in my teens and twenties if I'd known all of that :wacko:


----------



## kelly1973

sorry kath that witch is a total twat

aafm feeling really poo have severe ms boo


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi everyone!
I'm feeling hopeful about this cycle...it's gotta happen sooner or later...surely?
Kelly, sorry your feeling so crap :hugs:


----------



## SloanPet77

Hey there!

saw this thread after DH got mad at me last night and therefore withheld DTD! He knew it was "the time too"!! Grrr anyone else have this problem? DH's holding out on them when they get angry?


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> Hi everyone!
> I'm feeling hopeful about this cycle...it's gotta happen sooner or later...surely?
> Kelly, sorry your feeling so crap :hugs:

Oooo you sound really positive Katherine - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! :flower:

Hi SloanPet :hi: Nope, my OH withholds for a lot of reasons (tired, ill, not in the mood) but not when mad. That might be because when we have argued I am so mad with him that I would rather be poked in the eye with a stick than DTD :haha: He might be withholding but I wouldn't notice...

Does this happen often or is it a one off? Very annoying I can imagine :growlmad:


----------



## Katherine1209

SloanPet77 said:


> Hey there!
> 
> saw this thread after DH got mad at me last night and therefore withheld DTD! He knew it was "the time too"!! Grrr anyone else have this problem? DH's holding out on them when they get angry?




viccat said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi everyone!
> I'm feeling hopeful about this cycle...it's gotta happen sooner or later...surely?
> Kelly, sorry your feeling so crap :hugs:
> 
> Oooo you sound really positive Katherine - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! :flower:
> 
> Hi SloanPet :hi: Nope, my OH withholds for a lot of reasons (tired, ill, not in the mood) but not when mad. That might be because when we have argued I am so mad with him that I would rather be poked in the eye with a stick than DTD :haha: He might be withholding but I wouldn't notice...
> 
> Does this happen often or is it a one off? Very annoying I can imagine :growlmad:Click to expand...

Hi Sloanpet...i guess inclined to agree with viccat, especially the stick int he eye comment....made me crack up btw! :rofl:....My OH doesn't really with hold cause he's angry either...probably cause if he's shitty I usually am too so it's the last thing on either of our minds....plus around ov time I try to do anything to lessen the stress...make his fav meals, do extra house work...ANYTHING to increase my chances. :rofl:

I think it's a bit mean to do that to you, especially when ttc can be really stressful anyway :hugs:


----------



## janey211

Katherine...
Sorry to hear the news, but love your rebound! Keep up the good attitude. There is always another shot!! 

So, I am now starting my 2WW. UGH! Here we go. My brother in getting married next weekend and I am in the wedding so I have loads to get done. And my parents will be invading my home starting Wednedsay, so hopefully I won't have enough time to think about it. And thankfully,AF won't be due until after the wedding so my parents won't be around to see me loose it when she arrives.

Can you imagine if they were here during my O time? hahaha....."Mom, don't pay any attention to him and that cup and this syringe....ha!!!

I did talk to my husband yesterday and we are going to TRY to get this done naturally next month. We will try naturally at night, then the other way in the AM if it doesn't work. 

Oh and I just heard from my doctor, my FSH level was normal, so my eggs should be OK. My progesterone was very low so she ordered me another Progesterone test to take next week. If it is low again, may need some additional help. The fun of TTC and being over 35!

Good luck to you all and I am looking forward to good news!!!


----------



## SloanPet77

viccat said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi everyone!
> I'm feeling hopeful about this cycle...it's gotta happen sooner or later...surely?
> Kelly, sorry your feeling so crap :hugs:
> 
> Oooo you sound really positive Katherine - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! :flower:
> 
> Hi SloanPet :hi: Nope, my OH withholds for a lot of reasons (tired, ill, not in the mood) but not when mad. That might be because when we have argued I am so mad with him that I would rather be poked in the eye with a stick than DTD :haha: He might be withholding but I wouldn't notice...
> 
> Does this happen often or is it a one off? Very annoying I can imagine :growlmad:Click to expand...

Hi Katherine! This is actually the only time its ever happened! the next day he told me it was because he wants the moment we concieve our child to be romantic! haha oh boy is he in for a treat! My DH seems to think its going to happen on the first attempt.... he made it up to me last night :thumbup:


----------



## SloanPet77

Katherine1209 said:


> SloanPet77 said:
> 
> 
> Hey there!
> 
> saw this thread after DH got mad at me last night and therefore withheld DTD! He knew it was "the time too"!! Grrr anyone else have this problem? DH's holding out on them when they get angry?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> viccat said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi everyone!
> I'm feeling hopeful about this cycle...it's gotta happen sooner or later...surely?
> Kelly, sorry your feeling so crap :hugs:Click to expand...
> 
> Oooo you sound really positive Katherine - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! :flower:
> 
> Hi SloanPet :hi: Nope, my OH withholds for a lot of reasons (tired, ill, not in the mood) but not when mad. That might be because when we have argued I am so mad with him that I would rather be poked in the eye with a stick than DTD :haha: He might be withholding but I wouldn't notice...
> 
> Does this happen often or is it a one off? Very annoying I can imagine :growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> Hi Sloanpet...i guess inclined to agree with viccat, especially the stick int he eye comment....made me crack up btw! :rofl:....My OH doesn't really with hold cause he's angry either...probably cause if he's shitty I usually am too so it's the last thing on either of our minds....plus around ov time I try to do anything to lessen the stress...make his fav meals, do extra house work...ANYTHING to increase my chances. :rofl:
> 
> I think it's a bit mean to do that to you, especially when ttc can be really stressful anyway :hugs:Click to expand...

hahah thanks ladies! last night when i ascted like i wasnt interested he made it up to me. I think he is just stressed too and hasnt fully accepted changing our lives, he probably feels a little used? Oh well, all is well now. now if i can just get him again on saturday and monday we will be in buisness! How are you girls doing?


----------



## SloanPet77

Katherine1209 said:


> SloanPet77 said:
> 
> 
> Hey there!
> 
> saw this thread after DH got mad at me last night and therefore withheld DTD! He knew it was "the time too"!! Grrr anyone else have this problem? DH's holding out on them when they get angry?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> viccat said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi everyone!
> I'm feeling hopeful about this cycle...it's gotta happen sooner or later...surely?
> Kelly, sorry your feeling so crap :hugs:Click to expand...
> 
> Oooo you sound really positive Katherine - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! :flower:
> 
> Hi SloanPet :hi: Nope, my OH withholds for a lot of reasons (tired, ill, not in the mood) but not when mad. That might be because when we have argued I am so mad with him that I would rather be poked in the eye with a stick than DTD :haha: He might be withholding but I wouldn't notice...
> 
> Does this happen often or is it a one off? Very annoying I can imagine :growlmad:Click to expand...
> 
> Hi Sloanpet...i guess inclined to agree with viccat, especially the stick int he eye comment....made me crack up btw! :rofl:....My OH doesn't really with hold cause he's angry either...probably cause if he's shitty I usually am too so it's the last thing on either of our minds....plus around ov time I try to do anything to lessen the stress...make his fav meals, do extra house work...ANYTHING to increase my chances. :rofl:
> 
> I think it's a bit mean to do that to you, especially when ttc can be really stressful anyway :hugs:Click to expand...




viccat said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi everyone!
> I'm feeling hopeful about this cycle...it's gotta happen sooner or later...surely?
> Kelly, sorry your feeling so crap :hugs:
> 
> Oooo you sound really positive Katherine - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! :flower:
> 
> Hi SloanPet :hi: Nope, my OH withholds for a lot of reasons (tired, ill, not in the mood) but not when mad. That might be because when we have argued I am so mad with him that I would rather be poked in the eye with a stick than DTD :haha: He might be withholding but I wouldn't notice...
> 
> Does this happen often or is it a one off? Very annoying I can imagine :growlmad:Click to expand...

Hi Viccat! yes i agree with you. I think he is just stressed, its only our second cycle trying and he hasnt fully accepted it, he is nervous and terrified to have a baby, i dont blame him. i am being patient and if there is a month he is too scared and doesnt want me to push him, i wont.


----------



## Katherine1209

Sloanpet, my oh has said exactly the same thing about wanting the conception to be done in a positive light....it sounds all nice to me but after 6 months of trying I'm at the point where I couldn't care less as long as we DTD...:rofl:


----------



## Katherine1209

janey211 said:


> Katherine...
> Sorry to hear the news, but love your rebound! Keep up the good attitude. There is always another shot!!
> 
> So, I am now starting my 2WW. UGH! Here we go. My brother in getting married next weekend and I am in the wedding so I have loads to get done. And my parents will be invading my home starting Wednedsay, so hopefully I won't have enough time to think about it. And thankfully,AF won't be due until after the wedding so my parents won't be around to see me loose it when she arrives.
> 
> Can you imagine if they were here during my O time? hahaha....."Mom, don't pay any attention to him and that cup and this syringe....ha!!!
> 
> I did talk to my husband yesterday and we are going to TRY to get this done naturally next month. We will try naturally at night, then the other way in the AM if it doesn't work.
> 
> Oh and I just heard from my doctor, my FSH level was normal, so my eggs should be OK. My progesterone was very low so she ordered me another Progesterone test to take next week. If it is low again, may need some additional help. The fun of TTC and being over 35!
> 
> Good luck to you all and I am looking forward to good news!!!

Hi janey, ahh the tww! At least as you said you'll be busy so hopefully it will fly by....I'm in my own tww, the wait for ov....I feel like all I do is wait...wait for ov...wait for BDing, wait for af! :coffee: It feels like a bit of a merry go round.....:wacko:

I'm staying hopeful and thinking what a lovely birthday present we might get this cycle...my af is due the day before my 40th birthday on the 12th September, and the day after my OHs which is the 10th.

Fingers crossed for all of us, bring on the BFPs!! :happydance:


----------



## janey211

Well you can forget my last post. Not in the tww. I was doing OPK testing daily and thought I caught the surge cause I had a pretty dark line and then they got ligher and lighter. SO I assumed the darkest of the series was it....we did the deed and I thought I was done.

Well today I have major OV symptoms. (EWCM mainly and those stabbing feelings) so I tested for giggles and now it is a total positive....no way to misinturpret this at all. UGH. Just goes to show you how you can miss it if you are not paying attention....gonna run home and do a first response to see if I get the smile face....and do the deed again. Fingers crossed. I am a mess.


----------



## viccat

Oooooo at least you caught it janey! Go home and jump the man! :winkwink:


----------



## Katherine1209

I agree, get home and see if you can get some BDing going! And at least you know you ov, which is always a positive! I must admit I get a bit obsessed with poas around ov time...I have been known to test multiple times a day...just in case :rofl:


----------



## Hortensia

Good luck janey :)


----------



## kelly1973

good luck janey xx

hey ladies how are you all whos in the tww

i was a poas addict lol or rather a piap addict


----------



## viccat

Hey kelly - I am BORED of being in the tww!!! :wacko: However all is well, and looking forward to the bank holiday weekend.

How are you doing?


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi Kelly, im just as bored as viccat (how are you going v??) but waiting for ov atm...in a few days i think so just started poas today....then hoping for some good BDing this month and keeping my fx that this could be the month...:dust:

Janey, how are you going? and Hortensia?


----------



## greenjelly

Hey all. Kelly, nice to hear from you! How are you feeling?
I think I am in the TWW now. I got 2 smiley faces on my OPKs this week and I think we did BD at the right time but only twice so maybe not enough. We are still waiting for the results of my OH's sperm test. Im getting stupidly positive about it this month - I even had a little ahhh moment in front of the baby clothes in Tesco this afternoon - but also a bit of me cant believe it will happen so I wont be too amazed with AF arrives. In our new house now which I love. It is in a bit of a mess with stuff everywhere. And thats just with 2 of us. Where would everything go if we were a bigger family?! 
Kelly is your OH supportive and over the moon? 

xxx


----------



## Katherine1209

Fx Greenjelly! I know what you mean about the baby clothes! When we first decided to start ttc in march I went a bit crazy on ebaynand bought a whole heap of grow suits....so hoping they will be used eventually :wacko: promised my oh I wouldn't buy anymore stuff until I at least get a BFP...and I also started knitting then which I hav salons supposed now.....
I'm waiting for ov ATM! Then hoping for some good BDing in the next few days...:happydance:


----------



## greenjelly

LOL I havent actually bought any baby clothes (it hadnt crossed my mind to do that but now you have mentioned it...). Just had a little "Awww so cute" moment. Then I bought loads of crisps.:winkwink:

Like the knitting idea. Ive always wanted to but just remember doing it as a youngster and having loads of holes and dropped stitches. Is it easier as an adult. Good luck with BDing! xxxx


----------



## viccat

I nearly bought myself a maternity dress the other day because it was my size and on sale ...... but just managed to stop myself! :blush:

As for knitting - I took that up again a couple of years ago, after learning from my mum as a kid. Yes, I would say it is easier as an adult. It is a really pleasant, relaxing hobby :flower:


----------



## Hortensia

Hi ladies :wave:

I'm out this month since AF showed up on Tuesday evening, so we'll see what happens next cycle. I am temping & charting now for the first time since last year and planning to use guaifenesin next week so it's all a bit experimental at this stage. At the moment it feels like a minor triumph having the discipline to wake up at the same time each a.m. to take my temperature - yes, that's how well-organized I am :haha:

Greenjelly I can empathize about the crisps. Salty snacks are my weakness. Sometimes living virtuously and trying to turn my body into the perfect baby-capsule gets a bit tedious. My OH and I did a late-night run to the supermarket last night to buy chocolate. And I'm not even pregnant so don't have the excuse of cravings, just a greedy cow lol :haha:

viccat, I'm one of those women who wishes she could knit, quilt and craft. I've lost count of the number of times I've started a knitting project and not finished it. I think impatience is my problem. I have some friends who produce incredible knits and I'm always so envious of them!! 

Wishing everyone patience during the TWW :)

xx


----------



## Katherine1209

greenjelly said:


> LOL I havent actually bought any baby clothes (it hadnt crossed my mind to do that but now you have mentioned it...). Just had a little "Awww so cute" moment. Then I bought loads of crisps.:winkwink:
> 
> Like the knitting idea. Ive always wanted to but just remember doing it as a youngster and having loads of holes and dropped stitches. Is it easier as an adult. Good luck with BDing! xxxx

Yeah, oh was pretty shocked when he opened the package expecting some lingiire we had ordered and found grow suits...lol.....I also have these cute Bonds booties hanging up at work and in my walk in robe :rofl:

The knitting is definitely easier now, especially with you tube! Plus, I still take things to my mum if I get stuck :thumbup:


----------



## Katherine1209

viccat said:


> I nearly bought myself a maternity dress the other day because it was my size and on sale ...... but just managed to stop myself! :blush:
> 
> As for knitting - I took that up again a couple of years ago, after learning from my mum as a kid. Yes, I would say it is easier as an adult. It is a really pleasant, relaxing hobby :flower:

You'll never guess...but I also bought a maternity dress...about 6 months ago....lol...it was organic cotton and really cute :rofl:


----------



## Katherine1209

Hortensia said:


> Hi ladies :wave:
> 
> I'm out this month since AF showed up on Tuesday evening, so we'll see what happens next cycle. I am temping & charting now for the first time since last year and planning to use guaifenesin next week so it's all a bit experimental at this stage. At the moment it feels like a minor triumph having the discipline to wake up at the same time each a.m. to take my temperature - yes, that's how well-organized I am :haha:
> 
> Greenjelly I can empathize about the crisps. Salty snacks are my weakness. Sometimes living virtuously and trying to turn my body into the perfect baby-capsule gets a bit tedious. My OH and I did a late-night run to the supermarket last night to buy chocolate. And I'm not even pregnant so don't have the excuse of cravings, just a greedy cow lol :haha:
> 
> 
> viccat, I'm one of those women who wishes she could knit, quilt and craft. I've lost count of the number of times I've started a knitting project and not finished it. I think impatience is my problem. I have some friends who produce incredible knits and I'm always so envious of them!!
> 
> Wishing everyone patience during the TWW :)
> 
> xx

Sorry to hear about af H...:hugs:
Join us in the next cycle...fx!

As for the snacks, we also did a late visit to get a vast array of junk food last night! Sometimes I just cant help myself...:dohh: also a greedy cow..lol

As for the knitting and patience, i must admit I have got my mum to finish things off for me in the past...:haha:


----------



## kelly1973

hey ladies been a sad couple of weeks my great dane has been fading away and sadly died yesterday he was 10 so a good age but i still miss him.
hope all you ladies are ok oh has been great by doing aill the work ive been so ill at times unable to move from the sofa


----------



## Katherine1209

So sorry to hear about your great Dane Kelly, I have a miniature fox terrier and would be so devastated if something happened to him :hugs:
Glad you've been going well...I'm just starting the tww so trying to keep busy so the time won't drag so much :wacko:


----------



## greenjelly

Sorry to hear about AF, H. Never fun. Kelly sorry you have been feeling grotty too and about your doggie. Thats tough. Are you suffering from morning sickness?
I too am in the 2WW Katherine. Im trying not to symptom spot (My OH is amazed at my TTC lingo. Isnt it funny how quickly you start speaking in the baby making language?) but might just do a quickly Google as my nipples have been really hard recently.( sorry if TMI) I know its too early to be showing any symptoms but Im not usually this aware of my nips although they have calmed down a bit today. :thumbup:
Sara, how are you? xxxx


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi everyone!
I've been so stressed about BDing this cycle...OH got sick the day we had planned so we ended up waiting until cd13 :shrug:...positive OPK late on day 11 :thumbup:.... We also DTD on cd14! I am always so chuffed if we do it more than once AND it's ends in 'success'...I am hoping our timing was ok and so hoping for a BFP this cycle....
Fx!


----------



## viccat

So sorry to hear about your dog, kelly. We lost one last year and it is heartbreaking no matter what age they are. :hugs:

Sorry about the :witch: Hortensia - although I'm glad you seem pretty positive and are cracking on with the charting. I don't think I've got the hang of the discipline needed to get sensible temperatures just yet! Plus I do wonder if the fact I often sleep with my mouth open is causing some blips :shrug:

And ....... fingers crossed for everyone in the TWW!!! :thumbup:

I have tested a couple of times already because I was planning a night out those days. BFN both times so I had a couple of glasses of wine, and I certainly don't feel any different to normal so I think the :witch: will turn up on time this week. I had an "I left it too late" moment last night so need to give myself a kick up the bum and get on with life!

Oh and I turn 38 in three weeks time which isn't improving my mood! :nope:


----------



## Katherine1209

Don't give up yet viccat! :hugs: And...stay away :witch: I say!!
And you have plenty of time to get your BFP...I'm about to turn 40 the day af is due...12 th September! So i so get the feeling time is not on my side sometimes! 
Maybe me turning 40 will be a good omen for us both! Hope so!


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> Don't give up yet viccat! :hugs: And...stay away :witch: I say!!
> And you have plenty of time to get your BFP...I'm about to turn 40 the day af is due...12 th September! So i so get the feeling time is not on my side sometimes!
> Maybe me turning 40 will be a good omen for us both! Hope so!

Awwwwww bless you for being so positive :flower:


----------



## Hortensia

kelly1973 said:


> hey ladies been a sad couple of weeks my great dane has been fading away and sadly died yesterday he was 10 so a good age but i still miss him.
> hope all you ladies are ok oh has been great by doing aill the work ive been so ill at times unable to move from the sofa

So sorry to hear about this Kelly :cry: 

I hope you feel better soon :flower:

H


----------



## Hortensia

Viccat, 

I occasionally have those "I left it too late" moments. I'm a year older than you btw :winkwink:

I usually say to myself that it couldn't have turned out any other way, really. It is pointless beating yourself up over things left undone, although we all have times when we do it, frequently in my case. :wacko:

Re. the temping, I've only done it once before and it was interesting - recorded a bbt shift and pinpointed ov fairly accurately. I'd recommend it just because it gives you a lot of information on your cycle - for instance I found out I ovulated a couple of days later than I thought - day 15-16 instead of day 13-14, plus you find out the exact length of your luteal phase, which is useful to know. I think as long as you temp at the same time every morning having had a decent stretch of sleep you should be ok. It's a bit of a commitment but it's surprising how quickly you get used to it. :thumbup:


----------



## Hortensia

Katherine1209 said:


> Don't give up yet viccat! :hugs: And...stay away :witch: I say!!
> And you have plenty of time to get your BFP...I'm about to turn 40 the day af is due...12 th September! So i so get the feeling time is not on my side sometimes!
> Maybe me turning 40 will be a good omen for us both! Hope so!

:happydance: Love the PMA on turning 40 :thumbup:

Hope it will be a good omen!!!

:dust:


----------



## janey211

HI Ladies,

Just checking in! Viccatt, stay positive!!! Katherine, fingers and toes crossed for you again. Kelly, so sorry about the dog. nothing to say to ease that pain.
Hortensia, good luck with the temping and this cycle!!!

Just haning out waiting for AF to show up. I really feel like this month was a total wash. With he whole OPK issue I am not confident at all. I went back and looked at both OPK's that I thought were positive and they look the same. I did "BD" both times but who even knows what was happening. I am due on Friday but my due dates don't mean a thing. I have had random 39 day cycles before. I usually am spotting by now (if I were to get it on time) and I am not but still not hopefull. Just have a gut feeling ya know??

I was supposed to go get another progesterone test but didn't because I wan't sure when I ovulated so I am just waiting for next month. Moving on!!!

I have the "waited to long" feelings all the time. Why did I think it was no big deal and going happen right away? Doesn't matter now, we are here and doing our best. No sense in wanting to change the past.

Positive vibes to everyone!!!!


----------



## viccat

Nope - I am out this month, the :witch: has turned up.

Next month had better be my lucky month - I am turning 38, and have to find a new home as our landlady has given notice. Surely I deserve some good stuff to happen in recompense? :wacko:


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## Hortensia

viccat said:


> Nope - I am out this month, the :witch: has turned up.
> 
> Next month had better be my lucky month - I am turning 38, and have to find a new home as our landlady has given notice. Surely I deserve some good stuff to happen in recompense? :wacko:

Oh boo for the :witch: 

Sorry viccat - you should have a nice glass of :wine: (or two) and some chocolate!! 

Moving house is a phucking pain too - pardon my French.


----------



## viccat

Hortensia said:


> Moving house is a phucking pain too - pardon my French.

Tell me about it! We are only in rented because we have spectacularly failed to buy a house in the last 14 months. There is not a huge amount coming onto the market. I don't want to rent again, but there is no point rushing to buy somewhere that we don't really like. It really gets me down at times - I just want my own home!

If there is a silver lining, then at least it is forcing my deloved beloved to ditch some of the junk he has hoarded!


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## Katherine1209

Sorry viccat....damn witch! :hugs: I hope next cycle is yours :happydance:
Moving house can be such a chore, but your're right that at least you get to get rid of hoarded stuff!

Janie, that must really suck...not knowing when to expect af! I still have my fingers crossed for you though :dust:

Hortensia youre about a week away from ov?


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## Hortensia

Katherine, 

yep, ff is putting my ov day at day 18 (?) of my cycle based on a 31 day cycle - but my cycle is usually anywhere between 28-33 days in length. So I will be having the fun experience of POAS soon so as not to miss it - I have clearblue whatsits, not the digi ones. Still expensive though!! 

I realized lately that on each occasion I thought we had BD during a fertile time (in the few months we definintely 'tried') it was probably significantly too early.


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## Katherine1209

I mostly rely on opks to tell if and when I ov...ATM I surge on cd11, so guess I ov on 13?? Hope so...that's what we've been counting on with our BDing on cd11 and 13 this cycle....although i have an app on my phone that calculates i ov on cd15...so who knows!
Good luck with the BDing for you xx


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## greenjelly

Hortensia said:


> Katherine,
> 
> yep, ff is putting my ov day at day 18 (?) of my cycle based on a 31 day cycle - but my cycle is usually anywhere between 28-33 days in length. So I will be having the fun experience of POAS soon so as not to miss it - I have clearblue whatsits, not the digi ones. Still expensive though!!
> 
> I realized lately that on each occasion I thought we had BD during a fertile time (in the few months we definintely 'tried') it was probably significantly too early.

Viccat, sorry to hear about :witch: Im in the TWW. AF due on Monday I think. I keep checking my knickers for any sign of implantation bleed but nothing. I dont feel any different. Just hard nipples which gives me an inkling of hope but I fear I am fooling myself. 
Hortensia, did you use OPKs? We BD'd this month when I got smiley faces but I feel I have had EWCM after the smiley faces so I wonder if I ovulate later than I think I do. It might explain why nothing has happened for quite a few months now. Im wondering what our next steps are. My OH finally got his sperm test results and all looks ok there (he has a docs appointment on Monday but was told by the receptionist that basically he should be able to conceive naturally). So it suggests I am the problem. What are my options now? CHecking out the tubes? Ive had the blood tests and they seem ok. Ive always felt I dont want to do the IVF thing. What else comes before then? 

xxxxx


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## Katherine1209

Greenjelly, my doc sent me to have blood tests done to test progesterone levles to see if I'm oving and see what the egg quality is like, by measuring AMH..You get bloods taken on cd21..
Friends of mine take clomid which stimulates ov..


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## Hortensia

Hi Greenjelly

I've used opks and temping. The opks confirm an LH surge, which occurs just before ovulation (24hrs or so). The temps confirm ovulation has taken place by recording a thermal shift in your basal body temperature, caused by an increase in progesterone. The thermal shift does not take place until after ovulation though, so temps are no use in predicting ovulation - or only if you have a very predictable cycle and after a few months of charting. They're best used in combination. Charting is absolutely invaluable, IMHO, for the information it gives you about your cycle. It can tell you whether you are actually ovulating, and pinpoint the day of ovulation. It's also a very useful thing to be armed with when you consult a fertility specialist. 

Great news about you SO's sperm analysis. I've not had any tests so can't really advise on what might be next for you. I know several ladies on here have had the hysterosalpinogram (sp?) so it might be worth checking the threads on that. 

F'xd that it'll be your month anyway!!!

:dust:


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## greenjelly

So Hortensia, would temping confirm that an egg has come down? The OPKs tell that the hormones are right for an egg to be released but what if my tubes are blocked so the egg doesnt get through? How can you find out that? 
Im a bit fearful for Clomid. From what I hear, it can screw other things up somewhat. Am I just reading the bad things? 
Thanks for your thoughts. xxx


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## Katherine1209

The HSG...that long word Hortensia used...I think that is a non invasive procedure that is supposed to clear your tubes..


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## greenjelly

Katherine1209 said:


> The HSG...that long word Hortensia used...I think that is a non invasive procedure that is supposed to clear your tubes..

Ahah, I see. thanks for that. I will have a look into it. Do they do it on the NHS?


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## Katherine1209

Not sure, I know Medicare covers in in Australia


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## Hortensia

greenjelly said:


> So Hortensia, would temping confirm that an egg has come down? The OPKs tell that the hormones are right for an egg to be released but what if my tubes are blocked so the egg doesnt get through? How can you find out that?
> Im a bit fearful for Clomid. From what I hear, it can screw other things up somewhat. Am I just reading the bad things?
> Thanks for your thoughts. xxx

Temping wouldn't give any information about tube blockage, all it does is confirm that the ovaries have released an egg. The ovary that releases the egg turns into something called the 'corpus luteum' after ovulation, which is like a little progesterone factory, and pumps progesterone into your bloodstream. The reason it does this is that progesterone is the dominant hormone in supporting pregnancy. The two weeks after ovulation are known as the 'luteal phase' for that reason. Progesterone also causes a slight rise in body temperature. The bbt thermometer registers this slight rise, so it confirms that ov has happened. The thermal shift occurs about 24 hours after ovulation. If you don't conceive, the corpus luteum degenerates, progesterone production stops, you get a dip in temperature, and then you get your period. 

If there is a tube blockage I presume the egg would just be reabsorbed by your body, but there would be no way of knowing other than to get an examination (HSG probably). 

Have you looked at the information on Fertility Friend? It's incredibly informative. When you join up you get a free charting tutorial sent to your email account.


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## greenjelly

I have been to FF yes, because I wanted a chart at the bottom of my profile! But I couldnt get it work very well. I might have another go now...


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## Hortensia

greenjelly said:


> I have been to FF yes, because I wanted a chart at the bottom of my profile! But I couldnt get it work very well. I might have another go now...

You usually get a free 'VIP' session with various extra features for a limited time when you sign up. You have to pay for it after about a month I think (though I've never done this). Basically all you need is a bbt thermometer - I find the digis are easy - and then you enter the temperature online and it plots your chart automatically. I quite enjoy it, but I'm a bit of a nerd :blush:

Aren't you testing soon? :flower:


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## Juniperjules

Hi ladies,*
I've been reading from the start of this thread for nearly a week now! I feel like I know you all already! It's so strange but true! I identify with you ALL sooooooo much & I feel much less alone in this crazy journey.*

Me & my OH have been together 17yrs, & are TTC #1. I'm 37 (38 in Dec), & he is 44 next month.*

We've had a very tumultuous last few years & almost split 18mths ago. But after some brief time apart we knew we still wanted to be together. They say wot doesn't kill you makes you stronger!! Very true! When you meet someone at a young age I think it's unavoidable that eventually you run into some problems. Luckily we made it thru in one piece : )*

So here we are.. FINALLY TTC....however, we have run into some issues! After so many years of avoiding pregnancy, OH now has trouble finishing... We always used the 'pull out' method (TMI) bcos I never wanted to take the pill. So we'd have sex, then we'd creatively finish off., a mix of him & me using good old 'mrs palmer' (if u Catch my drift!)*
So I panicked of course.. Flipped out.. Cried.. Gave OH a hard time about it... Wondered if it was my fault of if he just wasn't attracted to me... Then took a DEEP breath & started google-ing!
And I found this website & a group of amazing women who have educated me on artificial insemination using a little specimen pot & 5ml syringe.... MAGIC! And heaps of these girls have gotten BFPS too. So I know it works.*

Thankfully OH is totally up for it bcos BDing was becoming pretty stressful for us both- especially him. Im taking elevit, drinking grapefruit juice daily, taking Chinese medicine (yucky!), cut down caffeine to one tea & one coffee a day, no cola at all, I've got cheapie OPKS (which have worked in the past), & am trying (but not liking) temping...*

So am at 10dpo and should OV this week... We're driving to the snowfields today for a few days break.. A little snow baby would be lovely! Am trying to remain positive & hopeful that this can happen. I'm naturally very pessimistic.... Especially with our ages.. But trying to be hopeful...

OH made me laugh earlier..*we saw some lambs & calves on the drive & I said 'Awww spring is the time for babies! So cute!' and His reply was 'did you remember to bring the syringe???' : ) how romantic eh!! At least he thought about it!*

Wishing you all the best of luck this month, & looking forward to sharing the journey with you x


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## viccat

Hi Juniper! :hi: Nice to have another friendly face around the place - and so lovely of you to give us a bit of background. I feel like I know you already! :flower:

I am at CD6 and should ovulate in about a week. I've been a bit "meh" about TTC for the last week or so. I'm not quite sure why - although I've got a lot on with trying to pack up and move house. I've also been looking at wedding dresses and am quite attracted to a couple that wouldn't be able to fit a baby bump into them! (although I'd quite happily sell them on and buy something new if I do get pregnant!)

I guess I'm just becoming more aware this might not happen naturally for me :nope:


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## Juniperjules

viccat said:


> Hi Juniper! :hi: Nice to have another friendly face around the place - and so lovely of you to give us a bit of background. I feel like I know you already! :flower:
> 
> I am at CD6 and should ovulate in about a week. I've been a bit "meh" about TTC for the last week or so. I'm not quite sure why - although I've got a lot on with trying to pack up and move house. I've also been looking at wedding dresses and am quite attracted to a couple that wouldn't be able to fit a baby bump into them! (although I'd quite happily sell them on and buy something new if I do get pregnant!)
> 
> I guess I'm just becoming more aware this might not happen naturally for me :nope:

Viccat, it nice to other things to distract you at times isn't it? I've been trying to keep myself busy catching up with friends, short break with OH etc. Bcos even though we've technically only just started properly TTC now, I've been desperate to have a baby for years now. So I'm doing my best.. not always successfully to keep my cool. Getting pregnant is like one of the only things left in life that you CAN'T control... Which is frustrating in today's world when we're so used to getting wot we want by either paying for it or working super hard to get it. But TTC is still a mystical journey that we can't predict... 

Ive become a big believer in not putting anything off 'just incase' I fall pregnant. Bcos then you are allowing it to rule ur life & that's misery making. My friend put off studying midwifery for 2 yrs while doing IVF, then decided to just go ahead and do it, & got pregnant WHILE doing the post grad mid course. I've let that be a lesson to me. I was tossing up my holiday in November thinking 'hmmm what if I'm pregnant by then?? How will I feel etc..' but again I've decided that if it happens I'll be Sooooooo happy that I'll just put up with anything! I'm also applying to go back to Uni again next year, & I figure if I get my BFP I'll just make it work. I'm just really trying to avoid putting my life on hold. So I say buy your favourite dress!!! Enjoy the process, & if u end up pregnant u will no longer care about the dress! ; ) 

I'm just waiting for Ov now.. 11dpo. I've got a persona monitor which is telling me I'm in my fertile time, but have run out of the bloody sticks & am waiting for more to arrive in the mail. I've got Internet cheapies as well which have worked really well in the past so am using them as well. My AF arrived early this month and was shorter than normal too- so am feeling a bit stressed about whether my cycles are screwing up. It's never ever happened before, I also had some strange spotting I've never had before AF. Am temping too, But not very well! It's all over the place. every now & then I panic about early menopause!!! For no other reason than knowing I've left this TCC late!

Think I'll do OPKS twice a day & go with that...


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## Katherine1209

Hi juniper! I'm enduring a long tww...due on 12th September, which is my 40th birthday! I'm hopeful I might get a wonderful birthday present but realistic that I have no symptoms whatsoever...
I agree that we should go ahead with life and make decisions about the future when they come along...sometimes it's easier said than done though...and i must admit I do get quite sad and disappointed when af comes :cry:

When weve tried using the syringe etc I always seem to have trouble getting the :spermy: into the container though...lol...it must look so comical watching me trying 'catch it all'.. :rofl: Now we have a system where he can help finish and then quickly 'get in there' ...tmi...just at the end...whatever works I reacon :thumbup:


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## viccat

Juniperjules said:


> Ive become a big believer in not putting anything off 'just incase' I fall pregnant. Bcos then you are allowing it to rule ur life & that's misery making. My friend put off studying midwifery for 2 yrs while doing IVF, then decided to just go ahead and do it, & got pregnant WHILE doing the post grad mid course. I've let that be a lesson to me. I was tossing up my holiday in November thinking 'hmmm what if I'm pregnant by then?? How will I feel etc..' but again I've decided that if it happens I'll be Sooooooo happy that I'll just put up with anything! I'm also applying to go back to Uni again next year, & I figure if I get my BFP I'll just make it work. I'm just really trying to avoid putting my life on hold. So I say buy your favourite dress!!! Enjoy the process, & if u end up pregnant u will no longer care about the dress! ; )

You are SO right about this. Thank you for putting it so eloquently! Part of the reason for faffing about buying a house is that I am toying with the "why buy a 4 bedroom house just in case we manage to have a family?" dilemma! I have eventually come around to the idea of buying a 3 bed doer-upper and making that my project for the next year or so. If it so happens I fall pregnant, then great :flower:

I won the bid on a dress on eBay yesterday, so we will see what it is like when it arrives **fingers crossed** I think it might be a bit short, but it was a design I liked and very cheap so it was worth the risk :)

Fascinated to hear that there are snowfields where you are! Are you skiing this week then?


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## greenjelly

Welcome aboard Juniper and thanks for putting things in perspective. I have been visited by the :witch: so I am out for another month. Felt really hopeful this month too. Had boob twinges and cramping - it just felt like something different was happening. If that wasnt a sign, what will be a sign?! Someone told me you definitely know when you are PG, but I dont think I am that in tune with my body. I am not going to not drink next month. Im just going to live my life as normal. If a baby is meant to be, it wil happen whatever. 
On the plus side, my OH finally got his sperm test results. He passed with flying colours (and doesnt he keep telling me...) so that is one thing we can tick off the "why isnt it happening list" but what next? Over to me...


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## janey211

HI Ladies....ANNNNNNND she is here. So, CD2, here I am again! Not surprised at all , as I stated before I wasn't hopeful. Just happy it wasn't too late so we can get started again! My 39th Birthday is 10/7.....

Welcome Juniper and good luck this month. The syringe is a weird experince isn't it? My husband and I laugh about it now. I tell him , "I need a sample"  Good for you for not putting anything off.....it is the way to be. Can't hold off on life and make it worse! 

Green, that is great news on the sperm , b/c that it allot harder to fix. I think next they would check the tubes. And possible drugs. That is good that your blood is coming back good...you have allot of positives going on 

Katherine, good luck, hoping for a awesome Birthday Present for you!

Viccatt-Hortenisa------stay stong! Someone is going to get a BFP soon!

I saw my regular doc this AM and she informed my my thyroid is still screwed up. Been trying to straighten it out for years. She really feels that there is a connection with Thyroid issue and fertility since the thyroid controls so many things in the body. She lowered my meds so we'll see. That may take a few weeks to work......kinda annoyed. I did start taking fertileaid 3x a day. It is supposed to help hormone levels. We'll see.....

I noticed someting interesting today. My doctor said to me, "When you get pregnant, we'll need to watch you thyriod closely"....what was weird was hearing the word "when" not "if". I realized that I really only think of this as an "IF" not a "when". 

I guess I am afraid to say "when" for fear of dissappointment. Before we started ttc it was "when". Heck, I even held off starting to try for a stupid vacation. I need to go back to "when" and think positively. Goign to listed to "The secret" again.......

Can't wait to celebrate with all you ladies WHEN we ALL get our BFP's!!!


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## Hortensia

:hi: Hi Juniper

Just popped in to say - 37 is the new 27, in case you hadn't heard!! It is definitely a matter of 'when' and not 'if'. 

Lots of babydust for you!

:dust::dust:


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## Juniperjules

Hortensia, hello!!! : ) Ah, I loved being 27- was a nice age! 

Katherine, oh I wish you'd get ur BFP for ur 40th! What a spectacular present! For OH & I the syringe is defo the easiest way to go- I was unsure about it until I read how many girls were doing it & getting pregnant! And the 'catching' is definitely kinda stressfully hillarious for us- we've done it tonite again & I'm always worried we'll miss the little specimen pot- but we got it! We laugh while were doing it so i guess thats a good thing.. Got About 1-2mls worth! The Chinese medicine lady told me not to do it this way bcos 'natural is better', she's lovely, but seriously, if this is the only way I can get OH swimmers in there for now, then I'm doing it. I'll just lie when I see her again! ; )*

Viccat, you should post a pic of ur dress! Would love to see it! I'm in Melbourne, so am skiing in the Victorian alpine country- its 2 and a bit hours away.*

Greenhelly, so sorry AF arrived. But great news ur OH swimmers are in good nick! I think the symptoms thing is different for everyone. My mum had missed an AF and didn't even realise she was pregnant with me- so she was pregnant with no 'definitive' type of symptoms. Who knows??? It's sooooo frustrating.*

So I'm 12dpo & got 2 lines on internet cheapie OPKS yesterday x 2. Today only the test line shows. We did the deed last nite with a syringe at around midnite. However i had no obvious CM last nite. but today at 12pm ive got loads off EWCM. Were gonna try & go again tonite.. But I'm wondering if last nite was wasted bcos of the lack of CM?? opinions?*


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## Hortensia

Katherine - really hoping you get a nice birthday present!! Are you managing to avoid the worst of symptom spotting? 

Greenjelly and Janey, sorry the witch arrived. :growlmad: 

Viccat and Juniper - I agree about not making decisions based on the possibility of getting pregnant at some point down the line. It's really easy to lose perspective - because of all this talk of being 'too old' yada yada I sometime find I think of myself as if I were an actual geriatric, which at 39 is just ridiculous. :laugh2: Viccat, your doer-upper plan sounds fun - my DH and I have just spent a good part of the last year doing the same thing :thumbup: It's been a tiring journey but the house is starting to look the way we want it to, finally :happydance:

As for me, day CD15 today and I notice EWCM this morning. Will do an opk this afternoon. Ov usually happens on day 16 and FF has predicted tomorrow for ov, so we will see. TBH I feel 'meh' about the whole thing this month - I think I've been listening to so much doom-mongering about older mothers (the British press seems to be full of it at the moment) that it's kinda putting me off. I know I shouldn't pay any attention to stupid sensationalist journalism but sometimes it's hard not to. :wacko: Do any of you ladies ever feel like this?


----------



## Juniperjules

Hortensia said:


> Katherine - really hoping you get a nice birthday present!! Are you managing to avoid the worst of symptom spotting?
> 
> Greenjelly and Janey, sorry the witch arrived. :growlmad:
> 
> Viccat and Juniper - I agree about not making decisions based on the possibility of getting pregnant at some point down the line. It's really easy to lose perspective - because of all this talk of being 'too old' yada yada I sometime find I think of myself as if I were an actual geriatric, which at 39 is just ridiculous. :laugh2: Viccat, your doer-upper plan sounds fun - my DH and I have just spent a good part of the last year doing the same thing :thumbup: It's been a tiring journey but the house is starting to look the way we want it to, finally :happydance:
> 
> As for me, day CD15 today and I notice EWCM this morning. Will do an opk this afternoon. Ov usually happens on day 16 and FF has predicted tomorrow for ov, so we will see. TBH I feel 'meh' about the whole thing this month - I think I've been listening to so much doom-mongering about older mothers (the British press seems to be full of it at the moment) that it's kinda putting me off. I know I shouldn't pay any attention to stupid sensationalist journalism but sometimes it's hard not to. :wacko: Do any of you ladies ever feel like this?

Sorry ur feeling low. I know exactly what u mean about the 'old' stuff. I'm the same. I'm 37, 38 in December, but feel 27! I'm fit & healthy- nothing to complain about there- but when it comes to TTC I really feel ancient. If I actually HAVE a baby, I don't think I'll feel too old, but at the moment the trying part makes me feel over the hill. Probably bcos like most of us in here I just feel deep down like I've missed the boat. Even my Chinese medicine lady said to me 'oh! Together 17 years! Shouldve had babies long time ago!'... I felt like saying 'No s*#t Sherlock!!*! But life isn't always that straightforward is it!!!'... I was a little irritated, but she's lovely otherwise & I guess was just stating the bleeding obvious. No point sugar coating it eh.... However my friend who is also using Chinese medicine had her lady say to her 'what 38?? Nah, nothing to worry about, still time!' : ) LOVE her optimism! 

Keep ur chin up hon. Although were at the top end of 30, theres still loads of women having babies at this age. I know 3 personally who had 1st babies at 40. But i know its hard somedays. Ive had a bad day today with OH trying to tell me he would be too busy later to give me his 'goods'!! I nearly had a total meltdown over it!! Sometimes I think I'm really losing the plot. But every month feels like another lost chance. He ended up saying 'ok, ok we'll do it'... How romantic.. Meh, who am I kidding? Screw romance I just want his swimmers tonight! We can have romance for the rest of the month ; ) 

forget what u see/hear in the media hon. The media is full of sensationalist rubbish. Women our age have maturity, and experience & how incredibly loved & adored will our babies be when they arrive. My mum had trouble TTC, & many miscarriages over about 10yrs.....And as a result my sister & I could not have been more loved, cherished, & adored by our parents. they are phenomenal parents.

Just trust your own instincts & remember how much you will love that baby regardless of your age ; )


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## Hortensia

You're so right, Juniper. Objectively, I know it's dumb to listen to the scare stories. For example, I worked with someone recently who had her first perfect baby at 43 and said loads of women in her family have done the same!! And the fact is that a lot of us are just not in the right place when we're younger to have children - I was emotionally immature, unhappy and in a crappy relationship for years and it would have been completely wrong to have had kids with that guy and I'm glad I didn't. Then I was bitterly single for a few years :haha: and didn't meet my sweetheart until my late 30's. And that's been the case for SO MANY women I know. I also think there are economic reasons for it - people of this generation have found it so difficult to get a stable job, house and mortgage for instance, that commonly it doesn't happen for many people until they are well into their thirties. My parents generation typically left school, got a job and a house and got married by 25! I think these things just go in cycles - for my grandparents' generation, the war delayed a lot of things and later marriages and pregnancies were common. My grandmother had my father and his sister at 40 and 42, shortly after her first marriage. 

I hope you get the 'goods' later! :haha: My OH is incredibly busy at the moment and both of us are tired so it's touch and go whether I will! I'm completely going by what he feels like doing this week - I don't feel like pushing the issue. Yeah, it's so incredibly romantic, the whole process :roll: TBH I think the whole sex-as-procreation rather than sex-as-fun thing is bothering me more than it bothers him just now. 

Right, I am resolved to stop reading scare-stories in the press for the next while!!! :haha:


----------



## HPMINI

Hi again!

Definitely ignore the scare stories. I saw one recently about older fathers being linked to children with autism but I am ignoring that one!!

I know the feeling about wondering whether to put things off just in case or just get on with it. I was wondering about whether to book a trip to Tasmania and Australia with the thought that if I did get pregnant I may be too far down the line to fly - but I didn't get to book it. Maybe the thought helped!

I'm a Brownie Guide leader in my spare time and shortly before I discovered I was pregnant I had booked a pack holiday in September, a sleepover in November and another pack holiday in April. A year before hand I was leaving it until the last minute to book and leaving it a little late so I decided I might as well just get on with it. So I'm having to find other people to run them for me.

The actual time of conception I think I had decided that it wasn't going to happen and I think I totally thought I had missed the opportunity for that month. Obviously not!

I do know how painful it is waiting though!

Wishing you all good luck!


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## Juniperjules

Arrrrrggggg... I'm do frustrated right now!!!! I've used OPKS before & they always showed up 2 distinct lines one day then nothing the next- no confusion- it was very obvious. But right now I feel so confused about whether I've already ovulated or not. 

I'm using the same OPKS (that I tried 2 yrs ago), but this time it's doing my head in. I used 2 on Tuesday & although the 2nd line wasnt very strong, there was a line there- twice. I've done it since & have gotten much lighter lines. But I'm starting to think they are all just evap lines!!! I used to ALWAYS get the 2nd line on 13dpo. This time it was only 11dpo.... And I only just got EWCM yesterday at 12dpo. And today so far it seems to be gone again. My last AF was also weird. Came 2 days early, was shorter than normal, & started with some CM & spotting that Ive never had before- ever... 

I feel like crying today. I'm feeling like my body has suddenly turned on me when I've always been straightforward as far as AF is concerned. Last night I was feeling positive, but today I feel like I don't know what the feck I'm doing!!! It's at a time like this that I feel really bitter about not being able to BD for days like some couples do- at least then it wouldn't feel like we were gonna just miss the boat completely! We did AI on tues nite after I 'thought' we had positive OPKS... But I'm doubting that now. We might try again tonite. 

I haven't seen a doctor at any point bcos I wanted to try for a little while. But It all feels like speculation & guessing & I'm feeling like I should just go get everything checked out rather than keep wasting time... 
Now I have to go to work and try to concentrate : (


----------



## Katherine1209

I find opks frustrating too Juniper! I'm always second guessing whether Ive ov'd or not...i'm trying to stay hopeful this month...at least until af arrives....but i really really hope she stays away!!!
If i were you Id just AI as much as you can...lol...if i could get my oh to dtd more id be so happy but hes much more particular about it than i am...has to be in the mood etc...doesn't matter to me at this point....although id like it to still be fun, i so want to get pg id do it just for increasing our odds...

Hi H, no symptoms to spot going on here at all...confusing! I finally had my blood test today to check progesterone and AMH so looking forward to finding out my result...mentioned to oh a few times about him getting a check but he seems to be putting if off and procrastinating!!!

Its so easy to get carried away with all the doubts, but its much less stressful to try to stay hopeful....i can drive myself crazy thinking 'it will never happen', but it just makes me sad so i do try to say to myself that the odds really are in my favour, especially with all the interventions that are available... if that's the road you want to take...as for me, if we don't get pg in the next few months ill be going to see a specialist...its not for everyone but if its not going to happen then i want to have tried all avenues...


----------



## Hortensia

FF has estimated ovulation to be today (which would be CD16, which makes sense). I had EWCM yesterday am and today am. Last night had pain which felt like mittelschmerz on left side of my pelvis. 

But I have done three OPK's - two yesterday (one am one pm) and one today (pm) all negative. From what I remember I have a 'slow surge' but is it possible just to miss the LH surge altogether? Anyone had any experience of this? :shrug:

My temp was still low this am but I guess my question will be answered anyway if it shows a shift tomorrow morning... 

I'm a bit mystified though...


----------



## Hortensia

Juniperjules said:


> Arrrrrggggg... I'm do frustrated right now!!!! I've used OPKS before & they always showed up 2 distinct lines one day then nothing the next- no confusion- it was very obvious. But right now I feel so confused about whether I've already ovulated or not.
> 
> I'm using the same OPKS (that I tried 2 yrs ago), but this time it's doing my head in. I used 2 on Tuesday & although the 2nd line wasnt very strong, there was a line there- twice. I've done it since & have gotten much lighter lines. But I'm starting to think they are all just evap lines!!! I used to ALWAYS get the 2nd line on 13dpo. This time it was only 11dpo.... And I only just got EWCM yesterday at 12dpo. And today so far it seems to be gone again. My last AF was also weird. Came 2 days early, was shorter than normal, & started with some CM & spotting that Ive never had before- ever...
> 
> I feel like crying today. I'm feeling like my body has suddenly turned on me when I've always been straightforward as far as AF is concerned. Last night I was feeling positive, but today I feel like I don't know what the feck I'm doing!!! It's at a time like this that I feel really bitter about not being able to BD for days like some couples do- at least then it wouldn't feel like we were gonna just miss the boat completely! We did AI on tues nite after I 'thought' we had positive OPKS... But I'm doubting that now. We might try again tonite.
> 
> I haven't seen a doctor at any point bcos I wanted to try for a little while. But It all feels like speculation & guessing & I'm feeling like I should just go get everything checked out rather than keep wasting time...
> Now I have to go to work and try to concentrate : (

Juniperjules, I hear you, on all fronts!! I have a feeling I'm not going to be in this cycle at all. :(

And I'm in the same boat re the OPK's. In the past have had an unambiguous result with them, but feel like I might have missed the surge this time. Did you test again today?


----------



## gustav72

Hi Everyone, I'm getting on this post late and I think posted a while back, but haven't read through all the posts yet, but I will. I'm feeling really discouraged with my husband's performance anxiety/low testosterone? He is so bummed. We haven't seen a doctor yet, but I am encouraging him to see his doc if it is in fact low testosterone...he has difficulty with maintaining his erection, which then, we can't finish. It was so frustrating last night as I am ovulating and we tried, with the same frustrating result. We took a break from trying the beginning of the summer because of this and thought it was stress, but now I'm beginning to wonder if it's testosterone. I will be 40 in November and my husband will be 44 in a month. We are TTC with our first child. I want to read the past posts regarding syringe use for insemination, as he can get the job done on his own. I'm trying really hard not to panic and go to the extreme that we will never be parents because of this. I should note, we are both seeing an acupuncturist and he has some herbs with some natural help but he hasn't taken the herbs yet. Thanks for listening...I just feel so alone, as I can't talk to any of my friends about this, but yet feel so hopeless and sad. I'll go back and read all the posts. Thanks again!


----------



## viccat

Juniperjules said:


> I feel like crying today. I'm feeling like my body has suddenly turned on me when I've always been straightforward as far as AF is concerned. Last night I was feeling positive, but today I feel like I don't know what the feck I'm doing!!! It's at a time like this that I feel really bitter about not being able to BD for days like some couples do- at least then it wouldn't feel like we were gonna just miss the boat completely! We did AI on tues nite after I 'thought' we had positive OPKS... But I'm doubting that now. We might try again tonite.
> 
> I haven't seen a doctor at any point bcos I wanted to try for a little while. But It all feels like speculation & guessing & I'm feeling like I should just go get everything checked out rather than keep wasting time...
> Now I have to go to work and try to concentrate : (

Oh I know exactly how you feel. Just one thing to check - you're not taking any new vitamins are you? When I took Pregnacare it did odd things to my cycle. I totally panicked and was convinced I was ageing and had left it too late (it doesn't take much for that ugly gremlin to rear it's head!) Anyway, I switched back to the equivalent Boots brand which has less "stuff" in it, and thankfully back to normal again.

I haven't seen a doctor either - OH and I agreed to try for 3 more months before we do that, and this is now the second of those months...... 



Hortensia said:


> FF has estimated ovulation to be today (which would be CD16, which makes sense). I had EWCM yesterday am and today am. Last night had pain which felt like mittelschmerz on left side of my pelvis.
> 
> But I have done three OPK's - two yesterday (one am one pm) and one today (pm) all negative. From what I remember I have a 'slow surge' but is it possible just to miss the LH surge altogether? Anyone had any experience of this? :shrug:
> 
> My temp was still low this am but I guess my question will be answered anyway if it shows a shift tomorrow morning...
> 
> I'm a bit mystified though...

The one month I tried to use OPKs I didn't get a clear positive, but my monitor pinpoints about the same day each month and it all matches up with EWCM. My understanding is that OPKs have varying sensitivity, and it may be that you just need a more sensitive test?



gustav72 said:


> Hi Everyone, I'm getting on this post late and I think posted a while back, but haven't read through all the posts yet, but I will. I'm feeling really discouraged with my husband's performance anxiety/low testosterone? He is so bummed. We haven't seen a doctor yet, but I am encouraging him to see his doc if it is in fact low testosterone...he has difficulty with maintaining his erection, which then, we can't finish. It was so frustrating last night as I am ovulating and we tried, with the same frustrating result. We took a break from trying the beginning of the summer because of this and thought it was stress, but now I'm beginning to wonder if it's testosterone. I will be 40 in November and my husband will be 44 in a month. We are TTC with our first child. I want to read the past posts regarding syringe use for insemination, as he can get the job done on his own. I'm trying really hard not to panic and go to the extreme that we will never be parents because of this. I should note, we are both seeing an acupuncturist and he has some herbs with some natural help but he hasn't taken the herbs yet. Thanks for listening...I just feel so alone, as I can't talk to any of my friends about this, but yet feel so hopeless and sad. I'll go back and read all the posts. Thanks again!

Sorry to hear you are having trouble gustav :hugs: how does OH feel about going to the docs?


----------



## Juniperjules

Juniperjules, I hear you, on all fronts!! I have a feeling I'm not going to be in this cycle at all. :(

And I'm in the same boat re the OPK's. In the past have had an unambiguous result with them, but feel like I might have missed the surge this time. Did you test again today?[/QUOTE]

Yep! I tested 4 times yesterday last one at about 7.30, then today I did one also about 11am. And to add to my frustration, I have this Persona monitor that I started using this month... & long story short- your not meant to mix up the batches of sticks you use.. & I have because I ran out.. So today the stupid machine isnt asking me for a stick when I KNOW it should be asking for them until cd23 at least!! 

Feel like this month is a total bust! makes me feel quite panicky actually like maybe I'm not Ov??? I have had a VERY stressful year & am now worried the stress & high cortisol levels might have screwed with my cycle. My mum told me I'm being too negative too quickly, & she's probably right. But I feel so dejected right now. Like all this effort, OPKS, temping, Chinese medicine, Ov Monitor are all just a painful waste of time.. I did get some EWCM on Thursday the day after we did the AI.. That's the only positive so far. But I think would be a miracle if the timing was actually right!


----------



## Juniperjules

Viccat, what kind of monitor are you using? Is it the Clearblue one?

I'm thinking of buying one for next month. The one I have (persona) is actually designed as a contraceptive but people use it the opposite way for TTC. But I've found an article about how really you DO need to use a proper one for TRC b is the algorithm's are different even though both are detecting oestrogen & LH.


----------



## Hortensia

Hmm, seem to have + opk this morning on CD17? Which confirms that I know jack about my menstrual cycle - I seem to be stuck in this mindset of 28 day cycles and ov on day 14. I don't have 28 day cycles! This makes me realize that all previous 'high likelihood of pg' times I was just wrong :wacko:

Juniperjules, :hug: I know that when DTD is an issue, there is huge added pressure to pinpoint ov exactly. I doubt I'll be in the 2ww since we probably won't get to DTD this month anyway :( I've decided I'm using this cycle as an observation anyway... And I am envious of couples who BD 3 or 4 times a week without any problems :cry: 

I agree with Katherine that you should AI as much as possible till you get an answer one way or another in this cycle. And do something you enjoy to try and take your mind off it (easier said than done I know)

This is JMO, but I think fertility monitoring manufacturers exploit women's anxieties to a large extent. I'm as guilty as the next POAS addict, but I sometimes think that just watching for EWCM and temping over a few cycles will probably do the job just as well and for a fraction of the expense! :growlmad: 

But maybe I'm just in a cynical mood...


----------



## Hortensia

gustav72 said:


> Hi Everyone, I'm getting on this post late and I think posted a while back, but haven't read through all the posts yet, but I will. I'm feeling really discouraged with my husband's performance anxiety/low testosterone? He is so bummed. We haven't seen a doctor yet, but I am encouraging him to see his doc if it is in fact low testosterone...he has difficulty with maintaining his erection, which then, we can't finish. It was so frustrating last night as I am ovulating and we tried, with the same frustrating result. We took a break from trying the beginning of the summer because of this and thought it was stress, but now I'm beginning to wonder if it's testosterone. I will be 40 in November and my husband will be 44 in a month. We are TTC with our first child. I want to read the past posts regarding syringe use for insemination, as he can get the job done on his own. I'm trying really hard not to panic and go to the extreme that we will never be parents because of this. I should note, we are both seeing an acupuncturist and he has some herbs with some natural help but he hasn't taken the herbs yet. Thanks for listening...I just feel so alone, as I can't talk to any of my friends about this, but yet feel so hopeless and sad. I'll go back and read all the posts. Thanks again!

:hi: Hi Gustav, 

From what you say it might be wise to ask your OH to see a doc about this. He would run tests and take past history into account - there is no doubt that simply not having enough sex is going to impact fertility. Would your OH be willing to see a medical professional? 

:hugs: I know you feel alone and stressed about this. There is a lot of advice and support to be had on these boards, and at the very least, being able to air your concerns might help. Sending you lots of positive vibes and :dust:

xx


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## Katherine1209

Gustav72, I know that when my oh hasn't been able to finish I've been totally devastated! Although I try not to let him know cause he's already under enough pressure....but it is sooooo frustrating, especially when the ov window can be short :wacko:

I've also has issues with opk's....I have to test twice a day as have missed it in the past...must be a quick surge and drop, but my lines are never very dark, I keep them all as its easier to see the surge when I can compare all the sticks...and if oh throws them out, as he sometimes does if he finds them littering the sink, I end up going in the bin to get it out ...:rofl:...you should see my face when he tells me he threw it out..like he has thrown a baby out or something....:rofl: and then my frantic pawing through the rubbish...lol

All in all, I just don't get why my OH wouldn't do anything to get the deed done....I'd be happy with AI everytime if it meant we could increase our chances...

I've had a couple of day 21 blood tests done now to measure progesterone to see if I'm actually oving which were all good....just had another to check AMH, egg quality...I've asked oh to get an sa, just to check, but he's procrastinating big time....arghhh!!

H, I'm so envious of those big bd couples too, especially when they are worried cause they ONLY did it 5 times in their fertile time...I'm lucky for two!!


----------



## viccat

Juniperjules said:


> Viccat, what kind of monitor are you using? Is it the Clearblue one?
> 
> I'm thinking of buying one for next month. The one I have (persona) is actually designed as a contraceptive but people use it the opposite way for TTC. But I've found an article about how really you DO need to use a proper one for TRC b is the algorithm's are different even though both are detecting oestrogen & LH.

Yeah, I have a Clearblue one. I am more than happy with it, as it finds my peak two days every cycle. Not sure whether you would gain much over the Persona - but I'm only guessing as I've never used one.

I have started temping to confirm ovulation, as that was the missing piece of the jigsaw puzzle for me. I was starting to wonder whether I got the LH surge but didn't ovulate. Otherwise the monitor would be enough - I don't use OPKs other than one month when I thought the monitoring was ignoring an LH surge. It just turned out I do get an early LH surge just after AF and then my proper LH surge later in the month.



Hortensia said:


> This is JMO, but I think fertility monitoring manufacturers exploit women's anxieties to a large extent. I'm as guilty as the next POAS addict, but I sometimes think that just watching for EWCM and temping over a few cycles will probably do the job just as well and for a fraction of the expense! :growlmad:
> 
> But maybe I'm just in a cynical mood...

LOL ..... I know what you mean (having just spent £25 on test sticks :wacko:)

I'm not sure yet whether my EWCM and temperature change have a measurable relationship with eachother though. The temperature change is only useful to tell you when in the cycle ovulation normally occurs relative to EWCM. Then you are working on probability for the next month.

I'm definitely happier with the advance warning of the LH surge that a monitor/OPK gives you. Having said that, I've got regular cycles so the cheaper version probably would have worked just as well for me! :dohh:


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> H, I'm so envious of those big bd couples too, especially when they are worried cause they ONLY did it 5 times in their fertile time...I'm lucky for two!!

You and me both...... :| 

Don't tell anyone but at times I have to stop reading certain threads when they touch a nerve. :shhh:


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## Katherine1209

Me too! And I don't answer some posts cause I'm too pissed! I think, don't you know how lucky you are!!

I'm so annoyed at oh tonight too, he all moody and it's starting to get to me....


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> Me too! And I don't answer some posts cause I'm too pissed! I think, don't you know how lucky you are!!
> 
> I'm so annoyed at oh tonight too, he all moody and it's starting to get to me....

Yup, I do that too! For the fear of offending anyone who might read this, I'm not going to list the things that get my goat!

Hmmmmm - what can you do about OH? :shrug: Would ignoring him for a bit help matters?


----------



## gustav72

Thanks everyone for the support! It really helps...it's difficult to talk to friends about this as they are in different situations and I don't want to embarrass my OH. He is very open to see a doctor, I think he's been pretty bummed the past couple of days, so I know once he is in a better space he will. I think it's important to have his levels checked as he's almost 44 and even though he's never experienced anything like this until we started to TTC, he's not in his 20's anymore. Thanks so much! I spent most of the morning trying not to cry at my work desk cause I was feeling so distraught, the support helps!


----------



## Juniperjules

gustav72 said:


> Thanks everyone for the support! It really helps...it's difficult to talk to friends about this as they are in different situations and I don't want to embarrass my OH. He is very open to see a doctor, I think he's been pretty bummed the past couple of days, so I know once he is in a better space he will. I think it's important to have his levels checked as he's almost 44 and even though he's never experienced anything like this until we started to TTC, he's not in his 20's anymore. Thanks so much! I spent most of the morning trying not to cry at my work desk cause I was feeling so distraught, the support helps!

TOTALLY know how ur feeling hon. I know part of my frustration is that my OH & I have always had a great sex life.. Never had any issues or problems. However, I have to say that it seems like since he hit his 40's it changed. His libido is lower for sure. If I didn't 'push' him, we can go for a month without having sex!!! Shocking to me, considering what he used to be like. And I get all paranoid about it wondering if he's just not interested in me anymore & then he gets annoyed & tells me im being stupid.. But he does admit that his drive is not the same as it used to be. There was also a couple of months where he was having trouble keeping an erection, but we just kept persisting (he kept saying to me that the more we tried the better it would work!). And actually he was right. It was almost like he'd gotten out of practice bcos we were going these long stretches with no sex. 

My Chinese medicine lady also commented that 'sometimes man over 40 need some help'....it's weird though, I would NEVER have imagined that we'd have these issues if you'd asked me years ago. As the saying goes 'old age doesn't come alone!'.. : ) I mean I know we're not 'old', but ageing must have something to do with it. 

The nice thing is, when u find a forum like this and you realise these problems are common & happening to lots of other couples. It makes you feel much less alone & weird!! (don't know about u girls but sometimes I DO feel like we're a bit weird!)


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## gustav72

Thanks! It does help to have a place to where people get it...sorry we are all in this situation right now though. My OH and I had a good talk tonight and we both are feeling more hopeful. He is going to see his doctor soon and get his testosterone levels checked. We have an acupuncturist, who gave him some herbs (goat something or other) and we'll see if that helps. :) I've let go of this month, and figure, there's always next month. :) sigh.


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## Katherine1209

Viccat, ignoring him is the only way, otherwise I'll just get more annoyed at him for being such a bummer! Went to bed and watched renovation shows...and oh is himself again today :happydance:


----------



## Katherine1209

I get it too...never been in this position before....spend most of my time trying NOT to get pg and now I want to its seems such a rollercoaster of emotions...and the disappointment of the last six cycles when af comes was really unexpected....I thought I would just take each month as it came and it would happen when the time was right....well I think the time has been right so,where the heck is my BFP....

I agree about the frustration as my OHs libido has decreased a lot...apart from when we went on holiday to thailand :rofl:...I know he loves and is committed to me but sometimes I do take it personally...especially as when Im oving is the only time we are really doing DTD at the moment....


----------



## viccat

Juniperjules said:


> If I didn't 'push' him, we can go for a month without having sex!!! Shocking to me, considering what he used to be like. And I get all paranoid about it wondering if he's just not interested in me anymore & then he gets annoyed & tells me im being stupid..

You and me both - I sometimes feel like a sex pest :wacko: However in OH's defence, he has always been like this. 

I do sometimes worry what he will be like in his 40s! :huh: Can your virginity grow back?


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## Juniperjules

Hehe... Yeh a few months back I actually said to OH that I felt like I was turning back into a virgin!! : ) gotta have a sense of humour in all of this eh??!!? Otherwise you'd go nutz!
I HAVE found that the more sex we have... The more sex we have... If u get my drift? I actually think we got a bit lazy & complacent. I put on alot of weight & lost my confidence, and I think that affected him too. So we kinda drifted away from having regular sex- & I felt uncomfortable in my own body. Then last year we both started cycling, sometimes 60-80km a week & I lost heaps of weight & got my confidence back. 

Unfortunately we've also had alot of external stressors this year due which hasn't helped either! But the sex has definitely been getting better & easier. 

Unfortunately I panic easily about all of this though. I did it the other night, started saying crazy things acting really insecure... I know it's all of the pressures on top of one another that eventually get to me.. If we weren't TTC I'd be happy just casually working on improving our sex life. It's the baby-making that is usually the straw that breaks the camels back!


----------



## Katherine1209

I know just what you mean juniper! My oh and I had a terrible fight the other night and it was mostly because of me feeling like we only ever bd now when I'm oving! We both got lazy when we got together and now it's starting to catch up in us....I think I'll have to start being more healthy....


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## greenjelly

Do you have plans for Wednesday Katherine? xx


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## greenjelly

Juniperjules said:


> Hehe... Yeh a few months back I actually said to OH that I felt like I was turning back into a virgin!! : ) gotta have a sense of humour in all of this eh??!!? Otherwise you'd go nutz!
> I HAVE found that the more sex we have... The more sex we have... If u get my drift? I actually think we got a bit lazy & complacent. I put on alot of weight & lost my confidence, and I think that affected him too. So we kinda drifted away from having regular sex- & I felt uncomfortable in my own body. Then last year we both started cycling, sometimes 60-80km a week & I lost heaps of weight & got my confidence back.
> 
> Unfortunately we've also had alot of external stressors this year due which hasn't helped either! But the sex has definitely been getting better & easier.
> 
> Unfortunately I panic easily about all of this though. I did it the other night, started saying crazy things acting really insecure... I know it's all of the pressures on top of one another that eventually get to me.. If we weren't TTC I'd be happy just casually working on improving our sex life. It's the baby-making that is usually the straw that breaks the camels back!

Well done on the weight loss Juniper. I too need to lose some. I might try cycling again. 

Just to say, I am on a mission this month. I want my OH's sperm every other day. Im on CD8 today and plan to get some every other day until AF arrives. I feel mean as it feels like I am just getting my OH to comply as a babymaker but I just dont think we usually have spermy sex often enough in the month. I am making use of Artificial Insemination techniques this month which removes the romance even more but at least I am guaranteed a delivery!


----------



## Juniperjules

greenjelly said:


> Juniperjules said:
> 
> 
> Hehe... Yeh a few months back I actually said to OH that I felt like I was turning back into a virgin!! : ) gotta have a sense of humour in all of this eh??!!? Otherwise you'd go nutz!
> I HAVE found that the more sex we have... The more sex we have... If u get my drift? I actually think we got a bit lazy & complacent. I put on alot of weight & lost my confidence, and I think that affected him too. So we kinda drifted away from having regular sex- & I felt uncomfortable in my own body. Then last year we both started cycling, sometimes 60-80km a week & I lost heaps of weight & got my confidence back.
> 
> Unfortunately we've also had alot of external stressors this year due which hasn't helped either! But the sex has definitely been getting better & easier.
> 
> Unfortunately I panic easily about all of this though. I did it the other night, started saying crazy things acting really insecure... I know it's all of the pressures on top of one another that eventually get to me.. If we weren't TTC I'd be happy just casually working on improving our sex life. It's the baby-making that is usually the straw that breaks the camels back!
> 
> Well done on the weight loss Juniper. I too need to lose some. I might try cycling again.
> 
> Just to say, I am on a mission this month. I want my OH's sperm every other day. Im on CD8 today and plan to get some every other day until AF arrives. I feel mean as it feels like I am just getting my OH to comply as a babymaker but I just dont think we usually have spermy sex often enough in the month. I am making use of Artificial Insemination techniques this month which removes the romance even more but at least I am guaranteed a delivery!Click to expand...

The cycling is the one thing that really works for me bcos it burns heaps of calories & I actually enjoy it- which means I don't give up! We did a 35km ride yesterday, start of spring here so weather is perfect for good riding. Mind u I'm paying for it today, did a few killer hills & my legs are feeling it today! 

Your AI idea sounds like a good plan. Good luck with it. I wish I could get OH to give me his swimmers that often. Sometimes u have to try something different, makes u feel like ur doing a bit more. So I hope it all goes well for you.

I hear you on the issue of using OH as a baby maker..I feel that way almost every month. But I keep reminding myself that after all the years together that's a ridiculous way to feel. And anyway, it's for both of our own good! OH wants a baby too, but if I left all of this up to him it'd never happen. He's too laid back, he just thinks 'hey, it'll happen, people have babies all the time, don't stress'. He even said to me last nite 'your probably pregnant already' & got annoyed when I said 'yeh I don't think so'. I'm not even sure I Ov this month! He does not get it!!!! ; ) 

Speaking of which... TMI WARNING!! So I am cd18 now. Not certain when/if I Ov this month. I thought 'maybe' on cd12 I might've. However.. This morning I seemed to have some unusual CM?? I hate to be gross, but it was like a 'blob' of CM.. Eeewww sorry girls, can't believe I'm writing that!!! It was like a mix maybe of EWCM & creamy CM. so now I'm confused to the max. If it IS Ov then it's really late for me & I'm not happy! This month is a bust I think. No flippin idea wot going on. I'm def buying a Clearblue monitor on payday...


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## Katherine1209

Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...

Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! :cry: I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...


----------



## Juniperjules

Katherine1209 said:


> Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...
> 
> Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! :cry: I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...

Oh cripes really... ((((hugs)))) So Sorry about AF arriving on you. Good that you being pro-active and going to see your doctor. I've been considering doing the same. On one hand I feel a bit silly bcos we haven't been TTC long, but I figure I'm almost 38 and shouldn't let the grass grow under my feet just waiting around to see if I/we are fertile enough to do this alone. 

Good luck with that. Will this be the first time you've approached ur Doc about TTC stuff?? 

3 days off, dinner cooked, & nails done sounds fab!! Is it actually your birthday Wednesday???


----------



## viccat

Good luck on the baby making front greenjelly! We DTD last night, and I'm not sure either of us was really in the mood, but hey at least we gave it a go. It is not the most romantic, but I think he has learnt at least it stops me from getting upset :winkwink:



Juniperjules said:


> Speaking of which... TMI WARNING!! So I am cd18 now. Not certain when/if I Ov this month. I thought 'maybe' on cd12 I might've. However.. This morning I seemed to have some unusual CM?? I hate to be gross, but it was like a 'blob' of CM.. Eeewww sorry girls, can't believe I'm writing that!!! It was like a mix maybe of EWCM & creamy CM. so now I'm confused to the max. If it IS Ov then it's really late for me & I'm not happy! This month is a bust I think. No flippin idea wot going on. I'm def buying a Clearblue monitor on payday...

Nothing is TMI around here! I get blobs of CM - generally around the EWCM time. I have always figured it is slightly dried up EWCM :shrug: Bodies are funny and fascinating things aren't they?


Sorry to hear AF has turned up Katherine :hugs: I was really hoping you would get your birthday BFP too.....


----------



## Katherine1209

Juniperjules said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...
> 
> Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! :cry: I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...
> 
> Oh cripes really... ((((hugs)))) So Sorry about AF arriving on you. Good that you being pro-active and going to see your doctor. I've been considering doing the same. On one hand I feel a bit silly bcos we haven't been TTC long, but I figure I'm almost 38 and shouldn't let the grass grow under my feet just waiting around to see if I/we are fertile enough to do this alone.
> 
> Good luck with that. Will this be the first time you've approached ur Doc about TTC stuff??
> 
> 3 days off, dinner cooked, & nails done sounds fab!! Is it actually your birthday Wednesday???Click to expand...

I've had two blood tests now, each on cd 21 to measure progesterone and AMH. Got my second lot of results from the receptionist today who said I might be peri menopausal!!? That scared the crap out of me so I've been googling a lot about what it means...but I'm seeing my dr Friday to see what our next step might be....also trying to get my oh to have a semem analysis but he's a bit of a procrastinator when it comes to medical stuff so he's dragging his feet....

Yes, my birthday is Wednesday and my OHs was Monday so we always go out on the Tuesday...off to a Mexican feasts and given my bfn and af showing up....I'll be enjoying a margarita too!


----------



## greenjelly

Katherine1209 said:


> Juniperjules said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...
> 
> Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! :cry: I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...
> 
> Oh cripes really... ((((hugs)))) So Sorry about AF arriving on you. Good that you being pro-active and going to see your doctor. I've been considering doing the same. On one hand I feel a bit silly bcos we haven't been TTC long, but I figure I'm almost 38 and shouldn't let the grass grow under my feet just waiting around to see if I/we are fertile enough to do this alone.
> 
> Good luck with that. Will this be the first time you've approached ur Doc about TTC stuff??
> 
> 3 days off, dinner cooked, & nails done sounds fab!! Is it actually your birthday Wednesday???Click to expand...
> 
> I've had two blood tests now, each on cd 21 to measure progesterone and AMH. Got my second lot of results from the receptionist today who said I might be peri menopausal!!? That scared the crap out of me so I've been googling a lot about what it means...but I'm seeing my dr Friday to see what our next step might be....also trying to get my oh to have a semem analysis but he's a bit of a procrastinator when it comes to medical stuff so he's dragging his feet....
> 
> Yes, my birthday is Wednesday and my OHs was Monday so we always go out on the Tuesday...off to a Mexican feasts and given my bfn and af showing up....I'll be enjoying a margarita too!Click to expand...

Good attitude Katherine. Life goes on without a BFP huh? Margarita sounds good too! Sorry to hear about AF though. I had been feeling confident last month too. Not fair is it? 
I have just been to see my doc. Now we have my OH's sperm test results, I feel more confident in pushing for more tests for me. She is going refer me for a HSG which I feel is the next step. My blood test showed I am ovulating and a scan didnt show anything wrong with my bits and pieces so the next step has to be my tubes .I told my doc about my AI efforts. She didnt seem too shocked and told me to carry on with the project!


----------



## Juniperjules

viccat said:


> Good luck on the baby making front greenjelly! We DTD last night, and I'm not sure either of us was really in the mood, but hey at least we gave it a go. It is not the most romantic, but I think he has learnt at least it stops me from getting upset :winkwink:
> 
> 
> 
> Juniperjules said:
> 
> 
> Speaking of which... TMI WARNING!! So I am cd18 now. Not certain when/if I Ov this month. I thought 'maybe' on cd12 I might've. However.. This morning I seemed to have some unusual CM?? I hate to be gross, but it was like a 'blob' of CM.. Eeewww sorry girls, can't believe I'm writing that!!! It was like a mix maybe of EWCM & creamy CM. so now I'm confused to the max. If it IS Ov then it's really late for me & I'm not happy! This month is a bust I think. No flippin idea wot going on. I'm def buying a Clearblue monitor on payday...
> 
> Nothing is TMI around here! I get blobs of CM - generally around the EWCM time. I have always figured it is slightly dried up EWCM :shrug: Bodies are funny and fascinating things aren't they?
> 
> 
> Sorry to hear AF has turned up Katherine :hugs: I was really hoping you would get your birthday BFP too.....Click to expand...

fingers crossed last nite was the charm for you Viccat! ive kinda decided that when it comes to our TTC attempts im not really bothered anymore if its romantic! gosh isnt that terrible?! but he knows how much i love him....i'll concentrate on making the rest of the month sweet and loving...its all about getting the job done right now : ) but i do feel a little psychotic sometimes. im soooo lucky that hes such a calm and placid person.

i dunno whats going on with my CM, its different this month to how it usually is. so im just gonna have to go with the flow. doubt that we even DTD during 
ov so im not putting any real hope into this month


----------



## Juniperjules

Katherine1209 said:


> Juniperjules said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...
> 
> Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! :cry: I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...
> 
> Oh cripes really... ((((hugs)))) So Sorry about AF arriving on you. Good that you being pro-active and going to see your doctor. I've been considering doing the same. On one hand I feel a bit silly bcos we haven't been TTC long, but I figure I'm almost 38 and shouldn't let the grass grow under my feet just waiting around to see if I/we are fertile enough to do this alone.
> 
> Good luck with that. Will this be the first time you've approached ur Doc about TTC stuff??
> 
> 3 days off, dinner cooked, & nails done sounds fab!! Is it actually your birthday Wednesday???Click to expand...
> 
> I've had two blood tests now, each on cd 21 to measure progesterone and AMH. Got my second lot of results from the receptionist today who said I might be peri menopausal!!? That scared the crap out of me so I've been googling a lot about what it means...but I'm seeing my dr Friday to see what our next step might be....also trying to get my oh to have a semem analysis but he's a bit of a procrastinator when it comes to medical stuff so he's dragging his feet....
> 
> Yes, my birthday is Wednesday and my OHs was Monday so we always go out on the Tuesday...off to a Mexican feasts and given my bfn and af showing up....I'll be enjoying a margarita too!Click to expand...

sorry you didnt get your BFP but try and stay positive.. my OH is a procrastinator with the medical stuff too. which irritates me bcos im a nurse and am the opposite. 

definitely enjoy a bucket load of margaritas on your birthday Katherine!! have fun and enjoy yourself for the night!!


----------



## lexus15

viccat said:


> Good luck on the baby making front greenjelly! We DTD last night, and I'm not sure either of us was really in the mood, but hey at least we gave it a go. It is not the most romantic, but I think he has learnt at least it stops me from getting upset :winkwink:.

My OH is no better..this month was wasted as cbfm never registered I ovulated & to top it OH never wanted to dtd at all this month after we talked about things & HE said we would dtd more. Could :gun::grr: literally.


----------



## Katherine1209

So frustrating Lexus, I have the same issue come up too...oh agrees we need todtd more and then we are lucky to bd twice in the fertile week....wtf!


----------



## gustav72

reading your posts and sending out hugs!


----------



## janey211

Katherine, Happy Belated Birthday, hope you had a great day!

Green, am with you. I am on CD11 and started yesterday with AI. doing in at least every other day or every day until CD 20 or so. We need to do AI cause my hasband hurt his back and he is on muscle relaxers and pain killers. Do you think that will hurt his spermies?


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi everyone! How is the week going for you all?

I was meant to go to dr today but got this letter saying I had to pay a fee to have my amh results read!...and from then it will take up to 10 days for the results to be sent to my dr...so cancelled appt cause what's the point if he can't tell me anything yet....:wacko:

OH and I had a good talk this morning about ttc and he said he is disappointed every month too...he said he likes to think hopeful but that it probably won't be this month....so then when af comes he's doesn't feel really really down about it...makes sense to me but I told him its ofetn hard for me cause i seem to over analyse symptoms and then that has me thinking more positively or negatively...depending on my mood...whether I'm in a glass half empty or glass half full mind set on that particular day :rofl:

I'm on a mission to get healthy too, Sunday is the day and I'm going to eat better, and walk everyday...sick of being so lazy...


----------



## greenjelly

janey211 said:


> Katherine, Happy Belated Birthday, hope you had a great day!
> 
> Green, am with you. I am on CD11 and started yesterday with AI. doing in at least every other day or every day until CD 20 or so. We need to do AI cause my hasband hurt his back and he is on muscle relaxers and pain killers. Do you think that will hurt his spermies?

oooh good luck Janey! I am insisting on us DTD (by any form possible, mostly AI) every other day and so this is the most sperm I have ever received in a month! :spermy: I dont see that a bad back should affect his swimmers but I have no medical knowledge at all. Good on him for going along with it when he is pain! 
I am going for a first session of acupuncture today. Not sure I want to go now. Not really scared of the needles but just cant see how enjoyable it will be and it is setting me back £70! Feel Id rather spend the money on a nice meal out! And just got emails from 2 girlfriends who have 6 month old babies (one with twins) and both said what hard work it is! Am I ready for that really?! 
Katherine how was your birthday despite the arrival for AF? Hope you had a good night. 
Kelly, how are you feeling? And Sara, are you ok? 

:dust: to all xxxx


----------



## viccat

Hi all :hi:

I am in the TWW now, and not feeling overly optimistic because my temperatures are all over the place. I am starting to wonder if there is something amiss despite me having a regular cycle and everything looking good (EWCM and LH surge) pre-ovulation.

Got to move house in a couple of weeks though, which will necessitate a change of doctor, so will visit once I am registered with a new doctor.


----------



## Katherine1209

greenjelly said:


> janey211 said:
> 
> 
> Katherine, Happy Belated Birthday, hope you had a great day!
> 
> Green, am with you. I am on CD11 and started yesterday with AI. doing in at least every other day or every day until CD 20 or so. We need to do AI cause my hasband hurt his back and he is on muscle relaxers and pain killers. Do you think that will hurt his spermies?
> 
> oooh good luck Janey! I am insisting on us DTD (by any form possible, mostly AI) every other day and so this is the most sperm I have ever received in a month! :spermy: I dont see that a bad back should affect his swimmers but I have no medical knowledge at all. Good on him for going along with it when he is pain!
> I am going for a first session of acupuncture today. Not sure I want to go now. Not really scared of the needles but just cant see how enjoyable it will be and it is setting me back £70! Feel Id rather spend the money on a nice meal out! And just got emails from 2 girlfriends who have 6 month old babies (one with twins) and both said what hard work it is! Am I ready for that really?!
> Katherine how was your birthday despite the arrival for AF? Hope you had a good night.
> Kelly, how are you feeling? And Sara, are you ok?
> 
> :dust: to all xxxxClick to expand...

Hi green, had a lovely birthday, oh gave me a birthday girl badge which I was allowed to wear all day and it gave me the power of oh doing exactly as I said all day....it was so much fun!
All geared up for October cycle...positive but realistic!


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> Hi green, had a lovely birthday, oh gave me a birthday girl badge which I was allowed to wear all day and it gave me the power of oh doing exactly as I said all day....it was so much fun!
> All geared up for October cycle...positive but realistic!

I'm liking the sound of that badge. It's my birthday soon - I think I will be asking for one too! :happydance:


----------



## Juniperjules

Katherine1209 said:


> Hi everyone! How is the week going for you all?
> 
> I was meant to go to dr today but got this letter saying I had to pay a fee to have my amh results read!...and from then it will take up to 10 days for the results to be sent to my dr...so cancelled appt cause what's the point if he can't tell me anything yet....:wacko:
> 
> OH and I had a good talk this morning about ttc and he said he is disappointed every month too...he said he likes to think hopeful but that it probably won't be this month....so then when af comes he's doesn't feel really really down about it...makes sense to me but I told him its ofetn hard for me cause i seem to over analyse symptoms and then that has me thinking more positively or negatively...depending on my mood...whether I'm in a glass half empty or glass half full mind set on that particular day :rofl:
> 
> I'm on a mission to get healthy too, Sunday is the day and I'm going to eat better, and walk everyday...sick of being so lazy...

Sounds like a good plan there, the gettin healthy stuff. How long till you get ur AMH results?? Are you nervous? I ask bcos im headed in that direction too i think- the testing stuff. 

my OH & I had a good talk today which started with him saying 'so you might be pregnant now right?' ... And I answered him trying to be positive but realistic, basically saying that I guess anythings possible but I doubt it since we might not even have been anywhere near Ov this month. Thanks to my crappy OPKS which I don't think worked. So we have agreed that we're gonna go to the doctor & run the gammet of tests to check if everything is working properly. Which I am SOOOOOOO happy about!! : ) I mean I can't honestly say we've been trying long but I want some peace of mind that we aren't wasting time for nothing IYKWIM?? I'm also going to talk to the doctor about whether we should consider IUI given OH's inability to 'finish' while actually having intercourse. I'm prepared to go at this all guns blazing. 

So I'm feeling positive tonite. I'm happy & relieved OH is so up for us both going to the Dr (I mentioned the fact that he is 44 in 2 wks & I'm 38 in Dec... Think that helped my cause!), I'll keep up the Chinese medicine, & fingers crossed we 'could' get a BFP over the next few months maybe......


----------



## Katherine1209

Juniperjules said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi everyone! How is the week going for you all?
> 
> I was meant to go to dr today but got this letter saying I had to pay a fee to have my amh results read!...and from then it will take up to 10 days for the results to be sent to my dr...so cancelled appt cause what's the point if he can't tell me anything yet....:wacko:
> 
> OH and I had a good talk this morning about ttc and he said he is disappointed every month too...he said he likes to think hopeful but that it probably won't be this month....so then when af comes he's doesn't feel really really down about it...makes sense to me but I told him its ofetn hard for me cause i seem to over analyse symptoms and then that has me thinking more positively or negatively...depending on my mood...whether I'm in a glass half empty or glass half full mind set on that particular day :rofl:
> 
> I'm on a mission to get healthy too, Sunday is the day and I'm going to eat better, and walk everyday...sick of being so lazy...
> 
> Sounds like a good plan there, the gettin healthy stuff. How long till you get ur AMH results?? Are you nervous? I ask bcos im headed in that direction too i think- the testing stuff.
> 
> my OH & I had a good talk today which started with him saying 'so you might be pregnant now right?' ... And I answered him trying to be positive but realistic, basically saying that I guess anythings possible but I doubt it since we might not even have been anywhere near Ov this month. Thanks to my crappy OPKS which I don't think worked. So we have agreed that we're gonna go to the doctor & run the gammet of tests to check if everything is working properly. Which I am SOOOOOOO happy about!! : ) I mean I can't honestly say we've been trying long but I want some peace of mind that we aren't wasting time for nothing IYKWIM?? I'm also going to talk to the doctor about whether we should consider IUI given OH's inability to 'finish' while actually having intercourse. I'm prepared to go at this all guns blazing.
> 
> So I'm feeling positive tonite. I'm happy & relieved OH is so up for us both going to the Dr (I mentioned the fact that he is 44 in 2 wks & I'm 38 in Dec... Think that helped my cause!), I'll keep up the Chinese medicine, & fingers crossed we 'could' get a BFP over the next few months maybe......Click to expand...

Supposed to be within two weeks, but really waiting for OH to get his arse in gear to get a SA done too... I'm a bit nervous about results but at least I'll know what we are dealing with and what might be the best path to take...My first blood test was for progesterone to see if im oving and that was okay but the second I'm not sure what results are except what my drs receptionist told me...something about perimenopause...??


----------



## Kat S

sienasmama said:


> Same problem here, although not as severe. At least half the time, he doesn't finish, and when he does, it takes 30+ minutes, and that's if he doesn't get a sex headache and have to stop. He has no trouble finishing on his own, which makes me wonder if it's me, even though in my head I know it's not. :( We're going to IUI next month, but as far as trying at home, I now keep cups and a few 10ml oral syringes around, just in case. He was a little uncomfortable with it at first, but now, no big deal. We can have fun together, and if he needs to finish on his own, he can and I won't be insulted, and his guys get where they need to be one way or another. LOL. Not very romantic, but you've gotta do what you've gotta do. :shrug:

Wow, Siensasmama, our stories are so similar, except my DH has never finished during sex. He's FINALLY seeing a specialist about it, but in the meantime, we're doing IUI.

Best of luck to you!!!


----------



## Juniperjules

Kat S said:


> sienasmama said:
> 
> 
> Same problem here, although not as severe. At least half the time, he doesn't finish, and when he does, it takes 30+ minutes, and that's if he doesn't get a sex headache and have to stop. He has no trouble finishing on his own, which makes me wonder if it's me, even though in my head I know it's not. :( We're going to IUI next month, but as far as trying at home, I now keep cups and a few 10ml oral syringes around, just in case. He was a little uncomfortable with it at first, but now, no big deal. We can have fun together, and if he needs to finish on his own, he can and I won't be insulted, and his guys get where they need to be one way or another. LOL. Not very romantic, but you've gotta do what you've gotta do. :shrug:
> 
> Wow, Siensasmama, our stories are so similar, except my DH has never finished during sex. He's FINALLY seeing a specialist about it, but in the meantime, we're doing IUI.
> 
> Best of luck to you!!!Click to expand...

Well I'm right there with you both girls. My OH isn't able to finish during actual 'intercourse'. He IS able to finish afterwards with a little help from me & helping himself (IYKWIM)... In all the years we've been together we used the 'pull out' method, & it's like now his brain/body is stuck & it's difficult to reverse it. 

So for now were doing our own AI. But I'm going to see my Dr this week to start getting some testing done, & I'm going to bring this 'issue' up with her. Bcos im wondering if maybe IUI would be an option for us too??? But I don't know if his particular issue would be enough for us to be considered for IUI? And although he is happy to have all the initial testing done, I dunno how comfortable he'd be with the idea of actually talking about his 'problem'...

Can I ask wot kind of specialist ur DH is seeing? 

Good luck with the IUI... Would love to hear from you wot the process is like...


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi Kat...best of luck with the iui! Like juniper, im reallt interested to hear how it goes....I'm still waiting to see my dr about our next step...it seems to take so long to get any answers at this point...appt after appt and blood tests etc...I never thought at the beginning of our ttc journey that it would quite be like this, but just going with the flow at this point and hoping a lot!


----------



## Kat S

Juniperjules said:


> Well I'm right there with you both girls. My OH isn't able to finish during actual 'intercourse'. He IS able to finish afterwards with a little help from me & helping himself (IYKWIM)... In all the years we've been together we used the 'pull out' method, & it's like now his brain/body is stuck & it's difficult to reverse it.
> 
> So for now were doing our own AI. But I'm going to see my Dr this week to start getting some testing done, & I'm going to bring this 'issue' up with her. Bcos im wondering if maybe IUI would be an option for us too??? But I don't know if his particular issue would be enough for us to be considered for IUI? And although he is happy to have all the initial testing done, I dunno how comfortable he'd be with the idea of actually talking about his 'problem'...
> 
> Can I ask wot kind of specialist ur DH is seeing?
> 
> Good luck with the IUI... Would love to hear from you wot the process is like...

Yeah, the main reason our Fertility doc recommended IUI is because my DH can't get "the goods" to my eggs, but since he can finish through masterbation, we're the perfect candidates for IUI. Male ejaculatory difficulties are enough to be an IUI candidate!

Oh, I almost forgot your other question! He is seeing not only the same fertility specialists I'm seeing, but he saw a urologist, too. Anyone doing fertility testing has to see a urologist anyway to get their sperm analyzed. My husband was at first funny about talking about it. "It's none of their business!" my big tattooed husband growled. But in the end, he realized it was for HIS benefit to get this problem solved, and the docs were sooo sensitive and understanding...and made him realize that his situation is not at all uncommon so he didn't feel freakish anymore. 

Good luck to you guys! So great to talk to others dealing with this particular issue.


----------



## Kat S

Katherine1209 said:


> Hi Kat...best of luck with the iui! Like juniper, im reallt interested to hear how it goes....I'm still waiting to see my dr about our next step...it seems to take so long to get any answers at this point...appt after appt and blood tests etc...I never thought at the beginning of our ttc journey that it would quite be like this, but just going with the flow at this point and hoping a lot!

OMG, right?! We started testing in JULY and here it is October and we still haven't "done" anything other than tests. It seems to take forever and I'm impatient and a little scared about all this "lost" time. I know that they can't recommend the right course of action for us until they determine what's going on with our bodies, but I wish it didn't have to take so long.


----------



## Juniperjules

Kat S said:


> Juniperjules said:
> 
> 
> Well I'm right there with you both girls. My OH isn't able to finish during actual 'intercourse'. He IS able to finish afterwards with a little help from me & helping himself (IYKWIM)... In all the years we've been together we used the 'pull out' method, & it's like now his brain/body is stuck & it's difficult to reverse it.
> 
> So for now were doing our own AI. But I'm going to see my Dr this week to start getting some testing done, & I'm going to bring this 'issue' up with her. Bcos im wondering if maybe IUI would be an option for us too??? But I don't know if his particular issue would be enough for us to be considered for IUI? And although he is happy to have all the initial testing done, I dunno how comfortable he'd be with the idea of actually talking about his 'problem'...
> 
> Can I ask wot kind of specialist ur DH is seeing?
> 
> Good luck with the IUI... Would love to hear from you wot the process is like...
> 
> Yeah, the main reason our Fertility doc recommended IUI is because my DH can't get "the goods" to my eggs, but since he can finish through masterbation, we're the perfect candidates for IUI. Male ejaculatory difficulties are enough to be an IUI candidate!
> 
> Oh, I almost forgot your other question! He is seeing not only the same fertility specialists I'm seeing, but he saw a urologist, too. Anyone doing fertility testing has to see a urologist anyway to get their sperm analyzed. My husband was at first funny about talking about it. "It's none of their business!" my big tattooed husband growled. But in the end, he realized it was for HIS benefit to get this problem solved, and the docs were sooo sensitive and understanding...and made him realize that his situation is not at all uncommon so he didn't feel freakish anymore.
> 
> Good luck to you guys! So great to talk to others dealing with this particular issue.Click to expand...

Yeh the waiting game is no good when ur biological clock is racing in ur ear is it! 

And Thanks : ) ... You've made my day telling me that 'ejaculatory difficulties' count as enough for IUI.. I'm in Australia but I'd guess the rules are the same here.. i'll ask the GP more questions on Friday. I'm wondering if I should ask to have the AMH test done??? I feel like some knowledge is great, but too much could be detrimental to my mental health! ; ) do u know does a woman's AMH have an impact on what options a fertility specialist offers?? It worries me that if I got a low number it might send me into a spin, & it's not like you can change or 'fix' it like you can various other problems. 

Hmmmm... I dunno, I'm undecided on that one..


----------



## Kat S

Juniperjules said:


> Yeh the waiting game is no good when ur biological clock is racing in ur ear is it!
> 
> And Thanks : ) ... You've made my day telling me that 'ejaculatory difficulties' count as enough for IUI.. I'm in Australia but I'd guess the rules are the same here.. i'll ask the GP more questions on Friday. I'm wondering if I should ask to have the AMH test done??? I feel like some knowledge is great, but too much could be detrimental to my mental health! ; ) do u know does a woman's AMH have an impact on what options a fertility specialist offers?? It worries me that if I got a low number it might send me into a spin, & it's not like you can change or 'fix' it like you can various other problems.
> 
> Hmmmm... I dunno, I'm undecided on that one..

I know it's tempting to not look into stuff like AMH levels because the results might not be ideal, but it really is best to know what you're dealing with. That way your doc can give you the best possible plan. I have that dreaded low AMH and high FSH level combination, yet my doc says that doesn't mean I can't get pregnant, it just means we have to use a different strategy than he would have recommended had my test results been normal. Knowing what we're working with allows the doc to prescribe the best possible plan!

I think I'm not allowed to post links, but there's a nice article about low AMH/high FSH over on Fertileheart DOT COM. Read it and see all is not lost!! 

I hope this makes sense!


----------



## janey211

Hi Kat. ....my situation is the same. We try, but it hasn't EVER happened from intercorse. We are good in all other areas, just not intercorse. We are doing AI at home. I am also in the Philadelphia Burbs! I may inbox you for a specialist referral.......

This month has been confusing. I haven't seen a positibe OPK yet. They came close then they started to get lighter and lighter. We did our thing every other day (and still going) but I haven't seen a positive OPK and I am supposed to get my progesterone checked again (after a low test 2 months ago) but now I don't know when to go? 

Should I just go and get the test, 7 days form the darkest line I saw? HELP!!!


----------



## Kat S

janey211 said:


> Hi Kat. ....my situation is the same. We try, but it hasn't EVER happened from intercorse. We are good in all other areas, just not intercorse. We are doing AI at home. I am also in the Philadelphia Burbs! I may inbox you for a specialist referral.......
> 
> This month has been confusing. I haven't seen a positibe OPK yet. They came close then they started to get lighter and lighter. We did our thing every other day (and still going) but I haven't seen a positive OPK and I am supposed to get my progesterone checked again (after a low test 2 months ago) but now I don't know when to go?
> 
> Should I just go and get the test, 7 days form the darkest line I saw? HELP!!!

Hi, Janey! :hugs: I'm happy to tell you where I'm going: Abington Reproductive Medicine. Each patient gets a team of specialty doctors working together to get you pregnant! Sounds creepy, doesn't it? :haha:

I've never used an ovulation predictor kit before, so I'm of no help there. :shrug: Maybe write up a separate post and an OPK "expert" will respond.


----------



## Katherine1209

janey211 said:


> Hi Kat. ....my situation is the same. We try, but it hasn't EVER happened from intercorse. We are good in all other areas, just not intercorse. We are doing AI at home. I am also in the Philadelphia Burbs! I may inbox you for a specialist referral.......
> 
> This month has been confusing. I haven't seen a positibe OPK yet. They came close then they started to get lighter and lighter. We did our thing every other day (and still going) but I haven't seen a positive OPK and I am supposed to get my progesterone checked again (after a low test 2 months ago) but now I don't know when to go?
> 
> Should I just go and get the test, 7 days form the darkest line I saw? HELP!!!

Hi Janey, i too have that issue with the OPK's...i generally keep them all and compare until the line starts to fade and assume that the darkest one was the LH surge...so if i were you i would get the bloods done 7 days after...

I have had two 21 day bloods done now...


----------



## janey211

Thanks Katherine and Kat. I am still testing and they are now getting darker and darker so I don't think i yet. It is so frustrating. I hate not being in control with this.

Kat, thanks for the referral. Abington is a bit too far for me but it sounds like a great team.
I really want my husband to get his SA done. Just not sure how to make that happen. He siad he will do it....just need to figure out how.

Katherine, you are still waiting on test results right?


----------



## Juniperjules

janey211 said:


> Hi Kat. ....my situation is the same. We try, but it hasn't EVER happened from intercorse. We are good in all other areas, just not intercorse. We are doing AI at home. I am also in the Philadelphia Burbs! I may inbox you for a specialist referral.......
> 
> This month has been confusing. I haven't seen a positibe OPK yet. They came close then they started to get lighter and lighter. We did our thing every other day (and still going) but I haven't seen a positive OPK and I am supposed to get my progesterone checked again (after a low test 2 months ago) but now I don't know when to go?
> 
> Should I just go and get the test, 7 days form the darkest line I saw? HELP!!!

Oh I had a painful month this month with the OPKS I was using. There 'was' a second line a couple of times from memory- but they never got as dark as the test line. It really made me mental! So from now on I'm only using the smiley face OPKS bcos I can't handle another month like this one. I would do as you say, go with the darkest one, in the end that's wot I did too... Even though I wasn't convinced!


----------



## viccat

Hi all, nothing really to report from me (this month looks a wash out) just popping in to wish everyone luck and baby dust. :flower:


----------



## HPMINI

Fingers crossed viccat for next time and everybody else!


----------



## Katherine1209

janey211 said:


> Thanks Katherine and Kat. I am still testing and they are now getting darker and darker so I don't think i yet. It is so frustrating. I hate not being in control with this.
> 
> Kat, thanks for the referral. Abington is a bit too far for me but it sounds like a great team.
> I really want my husband to get his SA done. Just not sure how to make that happen. He siad he will do it....just need to figure out how.
> 
> Katherine, you are still waiting on test results right?

Still waiting...the day I had my dr appt I got a letter from the pathologist saying I had to pay $75 to have my results done and from that day it would take another ten days...I cancelled the dr appt...have to make another soon...

Things have been stressful lately...oh and I have been arguing a bit which gets us both down and now I'm oving neither of us is really in the mood for BDing!


----------



## janey211

Katherine..

That stinks. I am sorry to hear that. It is stressful enough with all we need to worry about and to be arguing on top of it is awful! Hang in there, I am sure you'll turn a corner soon enough and you'll be dancing soon enough!!!

That seems so long and expensive to get results. My doc here just called me and verbally gave me the results. Can't me much help in that area since I don't know the system there. I guess, just go one controlling what you can control.

I am now convinced that I am not ovulating. I do have symptoms but I can't get a smiley face on the expensive tests. The cheapies show very similar lines but then I do a first response and nothing. We are still doing AI but seems like a waste of time at this point. I am getting progesterone test and pushing for an appt with a specialist.


Sending happy thoughts your way today!


----------



## viccat

Oh dear Katherine, sorry to hear that :hugs: It must be in the air because OH and I had our worst argument in ages at the weekend. Admittedly we were facing becoming homeless at the time which isn't great!

[All sorted now - just got the stress of moving to deal with. Which seems a minor inconvenience compared to the possibility of having to live in our tent]


----------



## greenjelly

viccat said:


> Oh dear Katherine, sorry to hear that :hugs: It must be in the air because OH and I had our worst argument in ages at the weekend. Admittedly we were facing becoming homeless at the time which isn't great!
> 
> [All sorted now - just got the stress of moving to deal with. Which seems a minor inconvenience compared to the possibility of having to live in our tent]

/ 
Whats happening then Viccat? When do you move into the new property? How long were in you sleeping in a tent? Conducive to BDing? Sort of romantic! 

Im hating my TTC obsession this month. I started temping halfway through my cycle and thought I had Ov'ed before I started temping and yet all my temps seem to be very low (from what I read on various forums) for post ov dates. Does that mean I have a progesterone problem? Did I not Ov? Am I still to Ov even though Im on CD19 (of a 26 day cycle)? If that is the case, do I have a short luteal phase so no chance for egg to safely implant! I feel I know a little bit too much and yet too little about too many things and Im wondering if temping isnt healthy for me. Is it just another obsession. We really went for the BDing this month too but it seems all to no avail. Hoping for an HSG soon, away with work for most of October so will come back with vengeance in November - when I will be TTC number 1 aged 40!! aRGH!
Katherine, sorry about your tests saga. Not fun.


----------



## Katherine1209

Hey! Thanks for all your kind words....fortunately everything is going great ATM...oh and i had a good chat and after two days off work, getting our backyard all prepared for a new lawn, things are back to normal....part of it is that when my oh gets stressed out he tends to get on my back a bit...and the other is that I'm not really eating any junk, including sugar, fat and caffeine..which is definitely making me more sarcastic and a bit moody...not a good combination...

So I am also having OPK frustration...got a postive result...I think on cd10! Wtf!! According to my chart I should ov on cd14?? Last month I got a positive OPK on cd11.... So who knows when I ov...but here's the good news.....we DTD late last night which would have been cd11 and then again this morning cd12.....I mean I am still in shock as he has never DTD twice in a row! He woke me up this morning saying do you want some more 'sparkles'...thats what we call his :spermy:....and i was like...yes bring it on and sparkle me up baby!!...so excited....I am hoping he might agree to one more bd...fingers crossed!!

And...I finally told oh about this perimenopause thing that my last blood test revealed and he said...well we will just have to get your egg and my sperm and find someone to carry it then....I did say there were some other steps we could take before we tried to find a surrogate...which is illegal here :rofl:...but it was cute to hear him so determined...


----------



## Katherine1209

greenjelly said:


> Im hating my TTC obsession this month. I started temping halfway through my cycle and thought I had Ov'ed before I started temping and yet all my temps seem to be very low (from what I read on various forums) for post ov dates. Does that mean I have a progesterone problem? Did I not Ov? Am I still to Ov even though Im on CD19 (of a 26 day cycle)? If that is the case, do I have a short luteal phase so no chance for egg to safely implant! I feel I know a little bit too much and yet too little about too many things and Im wondering if temping isnt healthy for me. Is it just another obsession. We really went for the BDing this month too but it seems all to no avail. Hoping for an HSG soon, away with work for most of October so will come back with vengeance in November - when I will be TTC number 1 aged 40!! aRGH!
> Katherine, sorry about your tests saga. Not fun.

Green.. I hear you about the temping... Part of me really wants to give it a go so i can have better info aobut my cycle and the other thinks it might just make me even more ttc obsessed....:wacko:

Look forward to sharing your November journey....as a fellow older and wiser 40 year old...:haha:


----------



## Katherine1209

viccat said:


> Oh dear Katherine, sorry to hear that :hugs: It must be in the air because OH and I had our worst argument in ages at the weekend. Admittedly we were facing becoming homeless at the time which isn't great!
> 
> [All sorted now - just got the stress of moving to deal with. Which seems a minor inconvenience compared to the possibility of having to live in our tent]

Hey viccat, hope your house situation is all okay...now not knowing where you're goings to live would be enough to stress anyone out...


----------



## SaraJewel

greenjelly said:


> viccat said:
> 
> 
> Oh dear Katherine, sorry to hear that :hugs: It must be in the air because OH and I had our worst argument in ages at the weekend. Admittedly we were facing becoming homeless at the time which isn't great!
> 
> [All sorted now - just got the stress of moving to deal with. Which seems a minor inconvenience compared to the possibility of having to live in our tent]
> 
> /
> Whats happening then Viccat? When do you move into the new property? How long were in you sleeping in a tent? Conducive to BDing? Sort of romantic!
> 
> Im hating my TTC obsession this month. I started temping halfway through my cycle and thought I had Ov'ed before I started temping and yet all my temps seem to be very low (from what I read on various forums) for post ov dates. Does that mean I have a progesterone problem? Did I not Ov? Am I still to Ov even though Im on CD19 (of a 26 day cycle)? If that is the case, do I have a short luteal phase so no chance for egg to safely implant! I feel I know a little bit too much and yet too little about too many things and Im wondering if temping isnt healthy for me. Is it just another obsession. We really went for the BDing this month too but it seems all to no avail. Hoping for an HSG soon, away with work for most of October so will come back with vengeance in November - when I will be TTC number 1 aged 40!! aRGH!
> Katherine, sorry about your tests saga. Not fun.Click to expand...

I was about to start temping but ended up having a month off as we were apart during that crucial fertile period. I have to say, it's the best I've felt in ages, not having to worry about TTC at all!

So I've decided not to temp, not to OPK, just to go for it every 2-3 days until we know the fertile period is likely over and try and relax a bit more about the whole process.

I guess that's why I've not been on here for ages.

Hope everyone is OK?????


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi Sara, glad things are going okay for you...I agree that the more relaxed about it I am the better I feel in the long run...I too have been trying to relax a bit more, but it's not always easy....

I've had such a relaxed day today. Did a bit of gardening with oh, made a lovely lunch and cooked dinner as well, watched some trashy reruns of the bachelorette...now just preparing myself to go back to work Monday...boo!

I have been drinking a lot of green tea and stuck to my healthy eating and exercise plan...I noticed a lot more ewcm this month..could it be the tea??


----------



## viccat

Hi SJ - lovely to see you around again! :flower:

Not a lot to report - other than the :witch: arriving 2 days early. I don't think I ovulated this month, which wouldn't be a surprise considering the amount of stress we've been under.

Still packing, and cleaning, and packing, and cleaning. Feeling a bit glum about the probability of getting pregnant naturally at the moment, and as a consequence indulging myself with a mini-mid-life-crisis.

On the plus side, we're all set to move at the weekend AND we had an offer accepted on a house to buy today. It is a doer-upper which I hope will help give me an absorbing project for a few months.


----------



## starbaby

My ex hub was similar, we tried 5 years to conceive, in fact not only could he not "finish" via intercourse, he couldn't maintain his "status" either :) in the end my daughter was conceived via home insemination with his swimmers in a femcap, not very romantic but effective all the same! 
Incidentally the dreadfully disatisfying sex life had a strangulating effect on our relationship which is why he is an EX husband, but if you two can enjoy eachother without the "finishing" part then thats a good thing, just maybe try the DIY AI for the fertile phase and then just enjoy eachother pressure free for the rest of the time?
Good luck hun, x


----------



## starbaby

Dear God, i didn't realise this was such a LOOOONG thread! Obviously my response was designed for the original post, and i wish now i'd seen its somewhat moved on since then! Ha ha! Sorry!


----------



## greenjelly

starbaby said:


> Dear God, i didn't realise this was such a LOOOONG thread! Obviously my response was designed for the original post, and i wish now i'd seen its somewhat moved on since then! Ha ha! Sorry!

:haha: starbaby. Your words are very welcome at whatever point they arrive in the thread! I love a success story! 

SJ so nice to see you back again! We all hijacked your thread and it felt wrong without you. I am likely to be away alone for my October fertile window so that will be a break for me. Is it nice just to not be thinking about it all the time? I imagine it is. I am so much better when I am in the office. When I work at home, I am constantly googling various symptoms and questions. So unhealthy! 
Viccat, good news about the house. Im not sure I ovulated this month either. I still keep thinking I might get that elusive first ever BFP though! 
:blush:


----------



## HPMINI

Greenjelly - the month I didn't appear to ovulate and only had high fertility indicated on the CBFM and never actually got to peak - was the month I conceived! So the test must have picked that up instead!


----------



## SaraJewel

Good luck green!

Aw you're all so nice having me back! It was defo lovely having a break tho! Hardly thought about TTC at all, was like being back to the old me!

Viccat sorry re AF coming early. 

HP how's the pregnancy going?

Kath, more ewcm could be due to better hydration.

And Starbaby, any comments are welcome so thanks for sharing!

Well we did it a couple of times in the fertile period so who knows! I think I have googled every symptom possible and every time I end up getting AF so have finally given up on doing that! YOu're right, it's totally addictive!

SJ x x x


----------



## HPMINI

SaraJewel

Pregnancy is going fine - we are now at 29 weeks! All midwife checks have been good. I stop work on 2 November! Eek! We have some things that we need but need to make a list to check out what else we need!

I feel like a very lucky person, going from thinking that it was something that wasn't going to happen, to actually achieving it! 

It's all possible. Fingers crossed!! I think it happened when I wasn't expecting it and was starting to give up hope! Fate!


----------



## janey211

Hello Ladies..

AF arrived today. Can't say I am surprised. I find myself thinking more about it not happening then it happening. I had my second progesterone test on Friday so just waiting for the doc to call and tell me it was low. This was the 6th month of ttc, so I guess off to the specialist we go. I turn 39 on Sunday (and our 6 year wedding anniversary), everyone wants to celebrate and I want to go to sleep. We will continue on the journey but remain level headed and prepared for the worst. Geesh, you can tell I have my period!

I hope you are all well and wish luck for positive vibes.


----------



## viccat

janey211 said:


> Hello Ladies..
> 
> AF arrived today. Can't say I am surprised. I find myself thinking more about it not happening then it happening. I had my second progesterone test on Friday so just waiting for the doc to call and tell me it was low. This was the 6th month of ttc, so I guess off to the specialist we go. I turn 39 on Sunday (and our 6 year wedding anniversary), everyone wants to celebrate and I want to go to sleep. We will continue on the journey but remain level headed and prepared for the worst. Geesh, you can tell I have my period!
> 
> I hope you are all well and wish luck for positive vibes.

I am sending :hugs: your way Janey, I know exactly how you feel. I didn't feel like celebrating my 38rd at all a couple of weeks ago. I am just building up to visiting the GP myself, and to be honest, not feeling much like doing it.

What about you? Will you definitely go to a specialist, or is it the :witch: talking?


----------



## HPMINI

I really hated New Years Eve last year - knowing it was the year I turned 39 :(
Fortunately fate worked my way which is good as I wasn't good at plucking up the courage to visit the doctors!!


----------



## janey211

Viccat,

yes we will go to a specialist. I will do IUI but not IVF due to cost. My progesterone was slightly higher 5.5 , up from 3.5 but no where near what it needs to be. My GYN gave me pregnitude, a supplement used to assist with ovulation. I also requested a sperm analysis for my husband which he is going to do tomorrow. I just want to make sure that is ok so we at least know it's on my end. She suggested to wait 2 more months while on this pregnitude and if everything is ok with his sperm analysis then we will do a low dose of clomid. 
My GYN doesn't want me to run to a specialist because it hasn't been a year yet, but I keep reminding her I am 39! I really need to get back on a healthy track. I was doing really well with eating and exercise and totally fell of the wagon. Got to get back on track!!!

Good Luck to everyone!


----------



## viccat

That sounds a pretty well thought out action plan Janey. I will be interested to see how you get on, because (at the moment) I don't want to do anything too invasive/costly either.

I will keep my fingers crossed for you :flower:


----------



## SaraJewel

janey211 said:


> Hello Ladies..
> 
> AF arrived today. Can't say I am surprised. I find myself thinking more about it not happening then it happening. I had my second progesterone test on Friday so just waiting for the doc to call and tell me it was low. This was the 6th month of ttc, so I guess off to the specialist we go. I turn 39 on Sunday (and our 6 year wedding anniversary), everyone wants to celebrate and I want to go to sleep. We will continue on the journey but remain level headed and prepared for the worst. Geesh, you can tell I have my period!
> 
> I hope you are all well and wish luck for positive vibes.

Hey Janey, I am with you. AF arrived on Wednesday. Feeling quite negative, used to look at symptoms and imagine the best but now just assume the worst.... I turned 39 a few months ago. We have been TTC 13 months now, but a lot of those months there was no chance of conception due to performance anxiety.

Gonna go to GP soon as have never felt there was any point discussing why we are not conceiving as there wasn't a chance for so long. Scared of OH's reaction to this tho. Worried this may bring back performance anxiety just when things are better on that front.

Sorry, not many positive vibes here! I feel so old and tired today :cry:


----------



## Zeri

Hi Sara Jewel, sorry to hear you're feeling down. I'm pretty much in the same boat as well. I've been considering asking DH to try Viagra, to help with the performance issue. Not sure how he would react to it...but I think it might help. As far as I know, Viagra helps them have a solid erection, as so they don't have to worry trying to get it up and failing...know what I mean? Do you think that might help your OH?


----------



## viccat

Oh SaraJewel, chin up hon - you are NOT old! 

Hey - I've got an idea. Each of us should think of a famous lady who is the same age as us, and is an inspiration on the aging fabulously front!

I've always been cheered up when I see pictures of Kate Moss partying and going to festivals and stuff. Heck she still gets modelling contracts even now, so "ya boo sucks" to being 38. :haha:


----------



## greenjelly

viccat said:


> Oh SaraJewel, chin up hon - you are NOT old!
> 
> Hey - I've got an idea. Each of us should think of a famous lady who is the same age as us, and is an inspiration on the aging fabulously front!
> 
> I've always been cheered up when I see pictures of Kate Moss partying and going to festivals and stuff. Heck she still gets modelling contracts even now, so "ya boo sucks" to being 38. :haha:

Good idea Viccat. How about Patricia Hodge? I know not particularly in our age range but the nurse at my GPs told me that she used to be Pat's nanny and that Pat only gave birth to her first child at age 42. She thought she would never get pregnant but did! So I hold her my mind for positive thoughts. She does look pretty good for her age too. 
Chin up Sara J. Completely understand your feelings but I hope you are feeling slightly happier today. 
xxxx


----------



## viccat

greenjelly said:


> Good idea Viccat. How about Patricia Hodge? I know not particularly in our age range but the nurse at my GPs told me that she used to be Pat's nanny and that Pat only gave birth to her first child at age 42. She thought she would never get pregnant but did! So I hold her my mind for positive thoughts. She does look pretty good for her age too.
> Chin up Sara J. Completely understand your feelings but I hope you are feeling slightly happier today.
> xxxx

I'm liking Patricia Hodge - according to Wikipedia she then had her second aged 46 :thumbup:


----------



## Katherine1209

I couldn't think of someone famous but my workmate announced she is pregnant yesterday, after 4 years of TTC and she is 44! 
My oh does take Viagra and it helps heaps! :rofl: :rofl:
I've had a shit time this cycle when af showed up...I'd been feeling really hopeful as we did twice rig in the fertile period...when af came I was gutted, couldn't stop,crying...
Feeling much better now and off to see my gp Friday about my progesterone and amh....fingers crossed...


----------



## familygirl30

Hi their, Do you think it would work if once my OH has ejaculated through foreplay i could put him inside me straight after?Advice please.


----------



## Kat S

familygirl30 said:


> Hi their, Do you think it would work if once my OH has ejaculated through foreplay i could put him inside me straight after?Advice please.

Sadly, once he has ejaculated, the game is over. I've decided to have my DH ejaculate into a Soft Cup, and then insert that. I'll let you all know how it goes! I feel like I have to do something else other than the one IUI a month to increase my chances.


----------



## familygirl30

Thank you for the reply I was hoping him inside me after ejaculation would be ok but will have to think of other way,so frustrating.


----------



## Zeri

familygirl30 said:


> Thank you for the reply I was hoping him inside me after ejaculation would be ok but will have to think of other way,so frustrating.

Yeah, I think once the spermies get exposed to air a lot of them die out...And then if he ejaculates into the air/on himself you mightn't end up getting most of them inside you anyway.

Is it difficult for your husband to finish inside you?

I asked how ppl felt about their OH's trying Viagra, but no one really responded. Could that help your husband perhaps? Seems to me like a libido/erection booster could solve a lot of the problems talked about here..


----------



## Kat S

Zeri, my DH can't use the Viagra type products because one of the possible side effects are eye problems, which my DH already has...we don't want him taking something to make that worse!


----------



## Juniperjules

SaraJewel said:


> Hey Janey, I am with you. AF arrived on Wednesday. Feeling quite negative, used to look at symptoms and imagine the best but now just assume the worst.... I turned 39 a few months ago. We have been TTC 13 months now, but a lot of those months there was no chance of conception due to performance anxiety.
> 
> Gonna go to GP soon as have never felt there was any point discussing why we are not conceiving as there wasn't a chance for so long. Scared of OH's reaction to this tho. Worried this may bring back performance anxiety just when things are better on that front.
> 
> Sorry, not many positive vibes here! I feel so old and tired today :cry:

Hi there girls... Haven't been in here for a few weeks but am back!! 

SaraJewel, my OH has trouble finishing. We can have fab sex, but when it comes to him finishing it just doesn't happen during actual intercourse. We've done the 'pull out' & both utilise 'mrs palmer' and various other little tricks that he enjoyed for years & years, so I don't really know when it became an issue. 

We TRIED dtd the regular way for a couple of months.... But each time started off great, then when it came to him actually finishing.... Disaster!!!! It was so stressful for us both. He felt embarrassed, frustrated & stupid, I felt unnattractive, old (almost 38), and was losing all hope. One nite I just burst into tears!!! And he first got angry with me... Then was so sad looking..and that's when I knew I had to do something about it. We've never had a problem in our sex life- its always been good. But we'd never TTC before. 

So I googled... Found BnB... and found a thread where everyone is doing home artificial insemination!!! AND getting BFPS! It was my light at the end of the tunnel! At first I was nervous to suggest it to my OH, I wasn't sure how he'd take to the idea of us using a syringe & spec cup to conceive... But I tell you wot, the look of relief on his face said what a thousand words couldn't have said : ) he was totally onboard, & we've just done our 2nd cycle doing home insemination, am about 2dpo now. 

I guess wot I'm trying to say is that these performance issues can be so stressful for our guys that sometimes offering another option is just what they need. Going to ur GP & getting some help might actually help your OH. I also found that me being able to say to my OH 'hey, this happens to loads of couples- its not the end of the world, weve got options' just lightened the whole TTC mood. Infact, we kind of have a bit of a giggle when were doing the inseminations at the silliness of it all. But all i care about is that it works. My OH is totally cool now with popping his goods into a spec cup!!! I NEVER thought that id say those words..


----------



## familygirl30

Hi,so soon as ejaculated in to cup you would use a syringe?so sperm be still alive at this point?


----------



## Juniperjules

Yep! The sperm are still alive. Once it's in the spec cup we let it sit for about 5-10 mins to liquefy a little which makes it easier to draw up into the syringe. Then I draw it up into a 5 or 10ml syringe, lie down with pillow under hips & inseminate. And there are loads and loads of couples both straight & lesbian, & single girls who've given up waiting for a guy to have a baby. It's very inspiring reading everyone's stories : )


----------



## familygirl30

So by spec cup could it be just a plastic throw away cup?thank u so much for the advice,are the success stories on this thread?or another one?


----------



## familygirl30

Can I ask how long u have been trying it this way?


----------



## Juniperjules

Heres a link to the thread, i hope it works.. Never posted a link before! https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/a...nsemination-donor-sperm-663.html#post22105041 

It's a very long thread, but worth reading from the beginning bcos pretty much all my questions were answered. We use a little specimen cup like the kind a doctor would get u to pee in. But really u could use any kind of container that is clean. 

Were on our 2nd month of doing this AI (artificial insemination). It has taken the stress out of TTC for us. Infact it has enhanced our relationship bcos were both so relaxed now bcos all the pressure for my OH to perform are gone. I had a positive OPK on Wednesday and we did the AI on wed & Thursday nite. I was so negative before we started this, now I'm feeling positive.


----------



## Kat S

Thanks for the info, Juniperjules! And good luck with your AI!!


----------



## viccat

Katherine1209 said:


> I couldn't think of someone famous but my workmate announced she is pregnant yesterday, after 4 years of TTC and she is 44!
> My oh does take Viagra and it helps heaps! :rofl: :rofl:
> I've had a shit time this cycle when af showed up...I'd been feeling really hopeful as we did twice rig in the fertile period...when af came I was gutted, couldn't stop,crying...
> Feeling much better now and off to see my gp Friday about my progesterone and amh....fingers crossed...

How did it go on Friday Katherine?

Thanks for sharing the info Juniperjules - it is great to hear about something making such a big difference. I've got my fingers crossed for you 

:happydance:


----------



## janey211

Hello ladies!

Welcome familygirl. I too do at home insemination. You will get the hang of it. It takes all the pressure off of performing! Haven't been successful yet, but still trying. I have my DH finish in a cup, he takes it to me, I draw the sperm into the syringe and in it goes. inject SLOWLY, if you do it to fast it will just come out. Having an orgasm(not vaginally) is recomended because if makes the cervix dip down to collect the sperm. I wait about 30 minutes before I get up. you will have fall out, don't worry, it is just the semen fluid, not the sperm.

SARAjewel, will your husband to at home insemination? have you discussed it? it is so much easier than the stress of performance. And according to my doc, it should work.

A few updates on my end. My husband had his sperm tested and it was abnormal. Not terrible but abnormal. The mobility is low which I feel is a result of him smoking pot. Some people take one of many mood medications.... my husband likes pot. It relaxes him and helps with his anxiety and I normally don't care. He is responsible and has a good job but I think it is doing a number on his sperm not swimming right right. He has agreed to quit so that is good news! He is also seeing a uralogist to discuss the results and see if there is somjething he can take improve them faster. And he is going to get a script for Viagra or Cialis. Not only does he suffer from the "finishing" problem, he is now loosing his erection. Even though we do the syringe each month, I would like to actually have sex. The syringe has replaced all need for it. So we are working on that as well. 
I do have a friend who said it really helped her husband finish better. I think that fact alone that thier penis so erect, excites them!! Also, sorry for any TMI, but there are adult toys out there for men that may help ....We have tried a few things that I think helped. Just a suggestion. If you want more info, feel free to ask.

I just bought a fertility monitor. I am done with these OV test strips. I can't tell what is what. DONE! bought the monitor and expect to get it tomorrow. It was expensive but so is IUI and IVF. 
Not feeling anymore HOPEFUL but also not giving up. Just controlling what I can control! I am CD14 today, we are starting insemination tonight and off we go.....

Katherine, how was the docs?


----------



## Juniperjules

janey211 said:


> Hello ladies!
> 
> Welcome familygirl. I too do at home insemination. You will get the hang of it. It takes all the pressure off of performing! Haven't been successful yet, but still trying. I have my DH finish in a cup, he takes it to me, I draw the sperm into the syringe and in it goes. inject SLOWLY, if you do it to fast it will just come out. Having an orgasm(not vaginally) is recomended because if makes the cervix dip down to collect the sperm. I wait about 30 minutes before I get up. you will have fall out, don't worry, it is just the semen fluid, not the sperm.
> 
> SARAjewel, will your husband to at home insemination? have you discussed it? it is so much easier than the stress of performance. And according to my doc, it should work.
> 
> A few updates on my end. My husband had his sperm tested and it was abnormal. Not terrible but abnormal. The mobility is low which I feel is a result of him smoking pot. Some people take one of many mood medications.... my husband likes pot. It relaxes him and helps with his anxiety and I normally don't care. He is responsible and has a good job but I think it is doing a number on his sperm not swimming right right. He has agreed to quit so that is good news! He is also seeing a uralogist to discuss the results and see if there is somjething he can take improve them faster. And he is going to get a script for Viagra or Cialis. Not only does he suffer from the "finishing" problem, he is now loosing his erection. Even though we do the syringe each month, I would like to actually have sex. The syringe has replaced all need for it. So we are working on that as well.
> I do have a friend who said it really helped her husband finish better. I think that fact alone that thier penis so erect, excites them!! Also, sorry for any TMI, but there are adult toys out there for men that may help ....We have tried a few things that I think helped. Just a suggestion. If you want more info, feel free to ask.
> 
> I just bought a fertility monitor. I am done with these OV test strips. I can't tell what is what. DONE! bought the monitor and expect to get it tomorrow. It was expensive but so is IUI and IVF.
> Not feeling anymore HOPEFUL but also not giving up. Just controlling what I can control! I am CD14 today, we are starting insemination tonight and off we go.....
> 
> Katherine, how was the docs?

Janey, can I ask how much pot ur DH smokes? My OH has 2 friends that smoke a fair bit of pot, so when he visits them it is inevitable that he ends up partaking also. He doesn't really even enjoy being stoned very much, but he does it to be sociable & says it would be anti-social to refuse. Up until now (TTC) I couldn't care less about it, but now it does worry me. A couple of times he has purposely refused but Even if it's only once a fortnight it still worries me. We are getting his SA done soon so I guess that will be telling. I'm hoping it'll be ok, but I guess if it isn't then he'll just have to start being rude & anti-social : )


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## janey211

Juniperjules said:


> Janey, can I ask how much pot ur DH smokes? My OH has 2 friends that smoke a fair bit of pot, so when he visits them it is inevitable that he ends up partaking also. He doesn't really even enjoy being stoned very much, but he does it to be sociable & says it would be anti-social to refuse. Up until now (TTC) I couldn't care less about it, but now it does worry me. A couple of times he has purposely refused but Even if it's only once a fortnight it still worries me. We are getting his SA done soon so I guess that will be telling. I'm hoping it'll be ok, but I guess if it isn't then he'll just have to start being rude & anti-social : )

Juniper, he smokes daily when he has it. I don't think that if your OH is taking a hit every fortnight(had to google that) it's a huge problem. that isn't allot but if the test comes out irregular then he may want to stop. My husband is going to have to expalin why has stopped to his friends and they better be supportive.

I have read allot about it and everything says that if you want to improve sperm quality, then you need to watch what you put in your body! I talked to him last night and we are going to cancel the uralogist appt. I can't see going to a doctor to discuss the issue when I know why it could be. 
By the way, that guy on the "donor sperm" board is totally shopping around for business. You can tell by his other posts that he is a donor. creepy.


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## Juniperjules

Yeh I completely agree janey- the other thought I had was that he is being kind of voyeuristic & getting off on reading the posts... Which is gross & like one of the other girls has said, also makes me feel slightly uncomfortable writing all this personal stuff. But I'm not gonna let some weird guy put me off. If he posts again I don't think I'll be able to stop myself telling him that he should be keeping his opinions to himself!! 

I know wot u mean about the occasional smoking stuff, and my OH has been pretty good trying to avoid smoking it around Ov time. But I'd prefer he stopped altogether until we've got a BFP... Then he can do wot he wants. Think I just find it a wee bit annoying bcos I know he doesn't even like it that much- he says it makes his buddy talk too much, & he on the otherhand struggles to talk or concentrate!! : ) what a pair!! 

So will u reschedule the urologist then? If so how long will u leave it?


----------



## janey211

Juniperjules said:


> Yeh I completely agree janey- the other thought I had was that he is being kind of voyeuristic & getting off on reading the posts... Which is gross & like one of the other girls has said, also makes me feel slightly uncomfortable writing all this personal stuff. But I'm not gonna let some weird guy put me off. If he posts again I don't think I'll be able to stop myself telling him that he should be keeping his opinions to himself!!
> 
> I know wot u mean about the occasional smoking stuff, and my OH has been pretty good trying to avoid smoking it around Ov time. But I'd prefer he stopped altogether until we've got a BFP... Then he can do wot he wants. Think I just find it a wee bit annoying bcos I know he doesn't even like it that much- he says it makes his buddy talk too much, & he on the otherhand struggles to talk or concentrate!! : ) what a pair!!
> 
> So will u reschedule the urologist then? If so how long will u leave it?

Juniper,

I decided to keep the appointment. Although I am sure the pot is a major contibuter, he can't hurt to discuss it in case they can presecribe something to improve the quality faster. So that is happening. I would also like to hear his interpretation of the results. meaing, how bad it is? should I be really concerned? can it still happen etc.

On a side note, we did AI this AM and I used a soft cup. Interesting peice of equipment. He used it has his "cup" and I inserted it. Went in fine, just hoping i can get it out,hahahaha. No leakage for sure!! I haven't had a positive test OV test yet. hoping I didn't screw up the timing this month. I was a little lax with testing last week......


----------



## Kat S

Last night I had my DH "finish" into a Soft Cup, and I put that in (no problem!) and we went to sleep. This morning, sadly, I couldn't fish it back out! I tried and tried. I had to have my DH get it out. He's such a good sport! Thank god he was still home or the nurse would have had to do it at my follicle check u/s this morning. That would have been mortifying! :blush:

Anyway, went in for the follie check and it's still too small - only 10mm. I go back on Saturday to see if there's any progress.


----------



## janey211

Kat S said:


> Last night I had my DH "finish" into a Soft Cup, and I put that in (no problem!) and we went to sleep. This morning, sadly, I couldn't fish it back out! I tried and tried. I had to have my DH get it out. He's such a good sport! Thank god he was still home or the nurse would have had to do it at my follicle check u/s this morning. That would have been mortifying! :blush:
> 
> Anyway, went in for the follie check and it's still too small - only 10mm. I go back on Saturday to see if there's any progress.

oh no.......now I am nervous!! I did a practice run and it came out fine but it was only in for a minute. they say to push (like your having a bowel movement) and it releases it...gosh I hope it comes out. eeek!

hoping for better news for you on Sunday Kat.


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Oh SaraJewel, chin up hon - you are NOT old!
> 
> Hey - I've got an idea. Each of us should think of a famous lady who is the same age as us, and is an inspiration on the aging fabulously front!
> 
> I've always been cheered up when I see pictures of Kate Moss partying and going to festivals and stuff. Heck she still gets modelling contracts even now, so "ya boo sucks" to being 38. :haha:

Thanks everyone! I am over my pity party now! I love Kate Moss too!

How is everyone?

Zeri, my OH has no probs with erection and his problems finishing are fewer and fewer (although they do still happen...........).

I am a bit more chilled out now and more focused on other parts of my life. I think I am more accepting now that this will take a long time and might not even happen. Not being negative, just a bit more realistic.

I hope someone gets good news soon!:hugs:


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## kelly1973

hi ladies just popping in to say hi hope your all well, sara your not old im even older then you massive hugs to you all xx


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## Juniperjules

So ladies i got my blood results back today.. Day 21 Progesterone, Hep B & C, chicken pox, rubella, glucose, thyroid function, vitamin D.. Can't remember wot else.. All good. Except have mild vitamin D deficiency. Am paranoid about skin cancer so tend to stay out of the sun. So Am now taking Ostelin to sort that. My Progesterone was 39.5 which I'm told is good & means I most likely did ovulate. 

I also got up the courage to talk to the Doc about my OH 'finishing' issues. She talked about whether OH would see an IVF doctor who is also an 'andrologist' (spelling???).. She also mentioned therapy?? But I pretty much know that my OH is unlikely to want to do that kind of stuff. Especially the therapy! No chance!! So I kept emphasising that our sex is great, but that it's only the finishing that's a prob & she simply said 'so probably if someone can just put the sperm in there then you'll be pregnant!' which sounded so nice & simple & easy! So we're gonna try that! Well, I haven't even had a chance to tell my OH about it, but pretty certain he'll go with wot I wanna do. 

So she has referred us for IUI. I have to decide if we want to go public or private??? Private might be quicker. So she has sent the referral to the local women's hospital & I'm going to call tomorrow to see if I can find out what the wait time is?? If it's too long I'm going to consider going private. Our Medicare rebates a big chunk of the cost back so it might not be such a big difference. Apparently it might just get more expensive if u go on to do IVF... Which I pray we don't...

Anyway.. Have started the ball rolling.. Scary..


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> hi ladies just popping in to say hi hope your all well, sara your not old im even older then you massive hugs to you all xx

Thanks Kelly! How are you feeling? Hope all is going well x x x


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## kelly1973

hi sara im good thanks still have wobbles but getting better as time goes on got my 20 week scan on the 13th so very exciting hugs to you all xx


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## viccat

Hi all ..... another busy week here. As expected the :witch: turned up on Monday. I was too busy to either a) log on and update or b) feel sorry for myself! :wacko:

So, here we are at cycle 10. Oh is away at the moment, but I will have a talk to him once we're both back in the same country. We will try again this month, but I think it is time to visit the GP and see if there is something other than the lack of BD stopping us getting pregnant.

I feel more and more that this might just not happen, but am managing to stay philosophical most of the time. :flower:


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## greenjelly

viccat said:


> Hi all ..... another busy week here. As expected the :witch: turned up on Monday. I was too busy to either a) log on and update or b) feel sorry for myself! :wacko:
> 
> So, here we are at cycle 10. Oh is away at the moment, but I will have a talk to him once we're both back in the same country. We will try again this month, but I think it is time to visit the GP and see if there is something other than the lack of BD stopping us getting pregnant.
> 
> I feel more and more that this might just not happen, but am managing to stay philosophical most of the time. :flower:

I know what you mean Viccat. I celebrated my 40th birthday last week so really feel I have entered another era. It just doesnt seem to be happening for us either. I have an HSG booked for the 13th so that might shed some light on things. I temped last month but got no variation in temps at all all month so not sure what is going on. I am away with work now and forgot to bring my thermometer which I actually think is a bit of a blessing. Its just another obsession! I cant imagine how it would feel not to have AF turn up. I have 25/6 day cycles and regular as clockwork. I suppose its good that I never even get to think i MIGHT be pregnant. We have been trying for 18 months now. Not a sniff of a BFP. My OH's sperm is fine so it's something in my bits. I dont know of any gynae problems, as I say very regular periods. Am I just an unexplained infertility statistic? 
:wacko:


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## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> hi sara im good thanks still have wobbles but getting better as time goes on got my 20 week scan on the 13th so very exciting hugs to you all xx

PS glad to hear things are going well Kelly. Do you have a bump yet? :flower:


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## kelly1973

hi green lovely to hear from you yes my bump feels massive ive put on a stone already first time ive ever excepted weight gain lol


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## janey211

Hello Ladies!

Juniper..glad you got the ball rolling. Those test results are great. You must feel better no?

Viccat, green....I now how you feel but we must not give up hope. It happens to people it should not happen to all the time...so why not us?

As for me, just waiting for AF to show up. I am cd 29 and I usually get it anywhere from 27-3. I have some cramping, so I assume she is on her way. Not allowing myself to think the cramping is anything other then what it is. I didn't get any positive OPK's last month and my timing was all ofther the place with AI. I am kissing October good bye.

My husband saw the urologist last week. Nothing major to report except that he agrees that the low motility is due to the pot smoking. He did way that his results "aren't terrible" and we should not feel too discouraged. e recomended a supplement that is supposed to increase it. We aren't going to take that one becuase it is $380 but I put a blend together with all the same ingrediants....we will see!

Good luck to you as usuall!


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi lovely peeps...I have been having a bit of a break from BandB lately...mainly to stop my constant obsessing...and shock of all shocks I got a BFP tonight! I'm in total shock...can't believe it....we only DTD once this cycle and I had to go to work so no time for legs on the wall either...did I mention I'm in shock??
After 9 months of trying and our appt with fertility specialist is in two days!! Have to cancel...keeping my fingers crossed for a sticky bean...xx
So 40 and knocked up is possible!!


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## HPMINI

Really good news Katherine! Congratulations!
I was getting to the stage where I thought I would see my doctor and get the OH there for testing, but turns out it wasn't necessary!
For everyone else - it really is possible!


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## janey211

Katherine....I am beaming for you! It means so much to hear good news! Congratulations and I hope all goes smoothly! Please keep us updated!!! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## gustav72

Congrats Katherine!!!! That's great news!


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## gustav72

HI All, I've been taking a break from the forum for a variety of reason, more to do with trying not to obsess so much. I've had a difficult few days....originally, I did post about my OH having some performance issues. He ended up getting his testosterone checked and a sperm analysis, all was fine. We put off TTC until we got results back since my OH's anxiety level was so high. We tried again this month when I was ovulating and he was having the same issues again!! He is so in his head with the pressure of TTC, we've been dealing with this since the summer, but now I am feeling very discouraged. He talked to his doctor about a Viagra prescription...this is unchartered territory for us....anyone else have success with OH using Viagra or similar supplement.


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## nobump

Hubby would rather sleep, he works makeshift I work normal hours are weekends enough.


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## Zeri

gustav, I'm sure viagra would help your DH, espeically if his testosterone is fine. then he wouldn't have to worry about maintaining his erection? the viagra would help with that, I should think. It would take some of the pressure off.


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## gustav72

Thanks...taking off the pressure is key, the pressure is killing our sex life and chances to have a baby! I am glad he is open to this as I know this hasn't been easy for him.


----------



## Katherine1209

Hi Gustav,
My OH uses viagra regularly and he doesn't really like to dtd without it now, he says it makes him feel like he's 20 again...lol and it really took the pressure off maintaining erection for him, it just stays up regardless :rofl:...and it totally worked for us this last month...we did only dtd once this last cycle too! And he gets his online so didnt have to go to dr...


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## greenjelly

Katherine1209 said:


> Hi Gustav,
> My OH uses viagra regularly and he doesn't really like to dtd without it now, he says it makes him feel like he's 20 again...lol and it really took the pressure off maintaining erection for him, it just stays up regardless :rofl:...and it totally worked for us this last month...we did only dtd once this last cycle too! And he gets his online so didnt have to go to dr...

OMG Katherine! amazing news! Congratulations. I am 40 and a week today so maybe November is the month for me! All the best. Keep it sticky! Is pineapple good for such things? 

xxxx


----------



## janey211

Spoiler
Hi Ladies,

I am still in shock as I write this. I am pregnant. Tested positive this AM. DH doesn't even know yet. I really didn't thing it would happen, but it did. Just goes to show you that you have have many obsticles:

abnormal ovulation ( not even sure I was at all)
Husband issues , low motility
Needing to do AI
Age 39

And you can still conceive. This shoud give you all hope for the future. I will say that this month and last month I wasn't crazy about it. I just picked the most active week and did AI every other day. The OPK's weren't working. I did use the instead cups this month and I was taking pregnitude. Maybe that helped or it was just the right time. I am so scared.....but so happy.


----------



## Juniperjules

janey211 said:


> Spoiler
> Hi Ladies,
> 
> I am still in shock as I write this. I am pregnant. Tested positive this AM. DH doesn't even know yet. I really didn't thing it would happen, but it did. Just goes to show you that you have have many obsticles:
> 
> abnormal ovulation ( not even sure I was at all)
> Husband issues , low motility
> Needing to do AI
> Age 39
> 
> And you can still conceive. This shoud give you all hope for the future. I will say that this month and last month I wasn't crazy about it. I just picked the most active week and did AI every other day. The OPK's weren't working. I did use the instead cups this month and I was taking pregnitude. Maybe that helped or it was just the right time. I am so scared.....but so happy.

Congratulations!!! Wot amazing news for you... It proves that it is possible! We're also doing AI & although I know it can work.. Sometimes it still feels silly & ridiculous.. But whenever I hear news like urs I'm reminded that it really can work. I had the cd21 progesterone test & it was 39.5, & we just found out yesterday that OH's semen analysis was good, no problems found. Of course there could still be other issues with me I guess??? But on the surface things 'should' be working ok. So you give me hope- thank you!

I really hope all goes well for you, good luck & enjoy a wonderful new chapter of ur life


----------



## SaraJewel

Katherine1209 said:


> Hi lovely peeps...I have been having a bit of a break from BandB lately...mainly to stop my constant obsessing...and shock of all shocks I got a BFP tonight! I'm in total shock...can't believe it....we only DTD once this cycle and I had to go to work so no time for legs on the wall either...did I mention I'm in shock??
> After 9 months of trying and our appt with fertility specialist is in two days!! Have to cancel...keeping my fingers crossed for a sticky bean...xx
> So 40 and knocked up is possible!!

Katherine, that's amazing news, congratulations! Only once??? Wow........:thumbup:


----------



## SaraJewel

janey211 said:


> Spoiler
> Hi Ladies,
> 
> I am still in shock as I write this. I am pregnant. Tested positive this AM. DH doesn't even know yet. I really didn't thing it would happen, but it did. Just goes to show you that you have have many obsticles:
> 
> abnormal ovulation ( not even sure I was at all)
> Husband issues , low motility
> Needing to do AI
> Age 39
> 
> And you can still conceive. This shoud give you all hope for the future. I will say that this month and last month I wasn't crazy about it. I just picked the most active week and did AI every other day. The OPK's weren't working. I did use the instead cups this month and I was taking pregnitude. Maybe that helped or it was just the right time. I am so scared.....but so happy.

Fab news Janey!!! OPKs haven't worked well with me. When you said you used the instead cups, in what way did you use them??? For AI?

Congrats!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:thumbup:

Wow 2 BFPs in short succession!


----------



## SaraJewel

Hi All,

I've updated the title of this thread to show our success so far! Thought this might help keep others motivated and give us all some hope???

If anyone has any objection to this let me know.

Was feeling quite gloomy, AF came on Thursday despite VERY good efforts this month so was disappointed. Told OH was thinking of going to GP, he looked at me like I was a bit mad but when I explained about ladies over 35 having no success after 6 months, he understood. I guess I forget how much I have read about all of this and how little men sometimes know. I am resigning myself a bit to the fact that it may not happen, but feeling a bit more hopeful again after the recent good news!

CONGRATS again Janey and Katherine!!!!


----------



## janey211

Juniper....yes it works. It feels redic but does it matter? Only one thing matters that they get where they need to go. You can have your intimate time together with no pressure and just enjoy it. We never got the goods there naturally. We were gearing to try some meds for the husband to see if that helps but turns out, we didn't need to. It's funny because I also just purchased the first response fertility monitor, which was like 150 bucks......hoping I don't need that again! And not complaining about the money because it is still allot cheaper then fertility treatments which were right around the corner. I really hope my story helps you to keep going....because I had allot of obstacles. My progesterone test 2 months ago was only 5.5.....it should be way over 10. Husband motility was 26%...should be over 50. 

I think you should use the instead cups for the AI......I had him deposit in there and inserted them. No leakage....no need for laying around for an hour.

Sara...yes, I used the instead cups for AI. This was the first month we used them. Could be a coincidence...who knows. But I really preferred it. And they say to use pre-seed as well. just put that in the cup with his "boys" and insert. I was going to start that next month as well.

I am so scared that something is going to happen. Keep thinking that I can't be this lucky. Must stop that and move forward as if all is well and we will have our baby by July.

You guys were the first people I told! I don't think my husband has really accepted it yet. He is happy but I don't think he thinks it is real. He was like...are you sure? How can you be sure? He doesn't want to tell anyone until we know everyhting is ok. 

Anyway girls....keep going :thumbup:


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## janey211

sara, I love the new title. Hearing the BFP's helped me so much. I can't wait to hear good news for you all soon!


----------



## viccat

Hi all - so much good news! :happydance: Katherine and janey I am so so pleased for both of you. Really thrilled that you've had your BFPs and it just shows, you don't need to be bonking like bunnies to be successful.

Send your spare baby dust our way, and have a happy and healthy 9 months girls! :D


----------



## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> Was feeling quite gloomy, AF came on Thursday despite VERY good efforts this month so was disappointed. Told OH was thinking of going to GP, he looked at me like I was a bit mad but when I explained about ladies over 35 having no success after 6 months, he understood. I guess I forget how much I have read about all of this and how little men sometimes know. I am resigning myself a bit to the fact that it may not happen, but feeling a bit more hopeful again after the recent good news!

Hey SJ - I just raised the GP idea with OH today too. He wasn't thrilled about the idea as he is a very private person, but accepted that it seemed like the next sensible step. No doubt I will have to give him a push to make the appointment, but we've got a couple of weeks before we are counting out this month.

I am sending you a :hugs: as it isn't easy is it as time goes on?


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## gustav72

Congrats Janey!!! Thinking good thoughts for everyone else!!


----------



## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> Was feeling quite gloomy, AF came on Thursday despite VERY good efforts this month so was disappointed. Told OH was thinking of going to GP, he looked at me like I was a bit mad but when I explained about ladies over 35 having no success after 6 months, he understood. I guess I forget how much I have read about all of this and how little men sometimes know. I am resigning myself a bit to the fact that it may not happen, but feeling a bit more hopeful again after the recent good news!
> 
> Hey SJ - I just raised the GP idea with OH today too. He wasn't thrilled about the idea as he is a very private person, but accepted that it seemed like the next sensible step. No doubt I will have to give him a push to make the appointment, but we've got a couple of weeks before we are counting out this month.
> 
> I am sending you a :hugs: as it isn't easy is it as time goes on?Click to expand...

No it doesn't get any easier, quite the opposite really! I haven't even raised him having an appointment with his GP yet! 1 step at a time............ Hugs back :hugs:


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## gustav72

So, since my last post a couple days ago, I talked to my gyn about our obstacles....she has referred me to a fertility information talk (it's how Kaiser does it), then I will have to get blood work and then they will most likely proceed with IUI...I'm nervous and scared. My OH already got his semen analysis and we did hear in the past couple of days all was fine with his results. We still await the viagra prescription, but guess with my age (I'll be 40 in less than two weeks), my doctor didn't want to wait around. This is all new to me...


----------



## SaraJewel

gustav72 said:


> So, since my last post a couple days ago, I talked to my gyn about our obstacles....she has referred me to a fertility information talk (it's how Kaiser does it), then I will have to get blood work and then they will most likely proceed with IUI...I'm nervous and scared. My OH already got his semen analysis and we did hear in the past couple of days all was fine with his results. We still await the viagra prescription, but guess with my age (I'll be 40 in less than two weeks), my doctor didn't want to wait around. This is all new to me...

It is scary but you will be OK. Where do you live? :hugs:

Stay strong..................


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## gustav72

Thanks SaraJewel...I have no idea what to expect and feel upset we can't get pregnant naturally, due to my husband's performance issues. We still will talk to his doctor about Viagra. It has really discouraged us more so this week, we both are in a funk. I live in the Bay Area, in California. I have Kaiser insurance, so they have you go to some informational meeting first, then blood tests, then nurse reviews it, then they assign you to fertility doctor...it all seems to take some time.


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## viccat

Looking on the bright side though gustav - at least his swimmers are good. :thumbup: From what I have read, that can be difficult to fix, and I do worry if we go for tests, what that might do for performance issues.


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## KJM2

Hope you dont mind me posting hear. My dh also had performance issues it was really bad at one point and nearly devasted our marriage. I know I put too much pressure on him to have sex on certain days even when hle didnt feel lilke it and couldnt finish then I wou get ld so upset then a vicious cycle would start to me I was living a nightmare in that I would never get pregnant. We resorted to using porn to help him. I was desperate I would have tried anything. We went through all the tests all normal and were a month away from private ivf when I finally got my bfp after 2 and hlf years trying. I never thhought it would happen. Fingers crossed you all get your bfp soon.


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## gustav72

Congrats KJM2!
True, Viccat! I'm thankful all is okay, as we were wondering if the performance issues were medically related. It seems it's more the pressure and anxiety of TTC.


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## janey211

One thing we tried that got him allot closer was.....well......cockrings (I am currenlty blushing They wear around thier penis and it makes it super hard..... it got him allot closer but not all the way. It is worth a try! You can purchase from
AdamandEve.com. They come in a non descript package so no one will know what you ordered. Maybe surprise him with it? 

Sorry if this was TMI.


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## gustav72

Not TMI :) ....we've considered using them in the summer when the issues started, but haven't tried them yet. We will give it a consideration.


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## greenjelly

Just catching up and what amazing news! Janey and Katherine - congratulations! How wonderful it must be to see a BFP! I can only imagine. 18 months ttc and not the faintest line. Got an hsg on tues and might look to start acupuncture once I know the result of that. Going to a fertilty clinic open day tomorrow just to see what (expensive, no doubt) options there are. I too have just turned 40. Perhaps that is a good omen! Does anyone else feel they are much more keen on the baby thing than their partner? It makes me worry that if a baby comes along, it will put too much strain on our relationship... 
Hope you are feeling good j and k and the other ladies who have had success during this thread!


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## viccat

greenjelly said:


> Got an hsg on tues and might look to start acupuncture once I know the result of that. Going to a fertilty clinic open day tomorrow just to see what (expensive, no doubt) options there are. I too have just turned 40. Perhaps that is a good omen! Does anyone else feel they are much more keen on the baby thing than their partner? It makes me worry that if a baby comes along, it will put too much strain on our relationship...
> Hope you are feeling good j and k and the other ladies who have had success during this thread!

I'll be interested to see what a fertility clinic considers a good starting point, if you don't mind giving us an update greenjelly? And good luck with your hsg next week. 

I feel like I am more keen on the baby thing than my partner, because I was the one pushing to TTC. Once he made the decision he seemed on board and does talk about what life with kids would be like ..... but ..... still not enough DTD which does make me wonder. However, he is actually better with our pets and other people's small children than I am. He is a total natural, enjoys having them climb all over him, throws them around - they all adore him. So I reckon he would be a very relaxed and happy dad after the first few weeks (when he's worried about dropping a newborn). I think the strain would be caused only if I fretted about every little thing. That's not likely, eh? :dohh:


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## SaraJewel

Oh I am definitely keener than OH. He would be happy either way. It scared the Sh*t out of him to start with, hence the performance anxiety, but he seems better now, hence virtually no/no performance anxiety.

I guess our next hurdle is that we may not be able to conceive. 

It can be so exhausting! Haven't been to doc's yet but realise as time ticks by it is something I should do.............

Let us know what happens at the clinic Green. Do you need to go private because of age? You are in the UK right? Good luck x


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## greenjelly

So here is my update. We went to the Herts and Essex Fertility Clinic (Yes, I am UK based but I cant work out how to change my profile details!) on Sat. They offer an IVF package for £2800 which is quite a bit cheaper than other places I think. I had my NHS appointment today for what I originally thought was an HSG but apparently it wasnt. I met with a gynaecologist who looked at the results of my various tests I have had already and now it appears I am in the loop which I guess is good but annoying that I dont feel any further along the line with knowing if I have any physical problems. I was looking forward to knowing the status of my tubes but it seems that has to wait. I have to call on CD1 and they will book me in for the HSG on CD5. Whether they will be able to do it next month, Im not sure. 
They did tell me I am too old for IVF on the NHS now (having just turned 40) but Im still not sure I want to go that route anyway. 
So it seems we just need to have lots of sex next month and see if it can happen naturally. But I feel like we have been doing that for months and months already!


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## SaraJewel

Thanks for the update Green!

We are with you every step of the way. It is good that we can still have investigations on the NHS even if not IVF. I know what you mean about IVF, I'm not sure I would do it either but I suppose that's because I don't know what our situation is regarding fertility.

Good luck with your HSG when you get it x x x

How is everyone else? You are all very quiet. Not much happening with me. Not been to doc's yet, just continuing to try.............


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## gustav72

Thinking good thoughts for you Sara Jewel!

I (we) are going to our first "infertility" appt. the Wednesday after Thanksgiving. I haven't thought much about it since I've been celebrating my 40th birthday this past week...but, not that all the celebrations are over, I'm a bit anxious about it. I'm sure I will need blood work and my OH has already done all the sperm analysis. He is going to to his doctor this week to talk to him about Viagra...so, we will see. sigh.


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## viccat

Thanks for the update green. Interesting to hear that the NHS IVF assistance cuts off at age 40. I still don't feel like I want to go down that route, but at least now I know I need to think about it before then! I never knew there were NHS fertility clinics either ..... how naive am I? :blush:

Been quiet lately because we've been busy and I've been rather :nope: about TTC. I have decidedly fallen off the wagon in the last couple of months, drinking a bit too much and not taking my vitamins. The :witch: arrived at the weekend, in conjunction with the very cute niece and nephew which didn't put me in the best of moods.

On the plus side, I have been accidentally tee-total for the last week, and am feeling more focused about getting back on vitamins etc. so I am gearing up to be super-positive again. OH and I talked about going to the doctors again yesterday - just need to make the appointment now.


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## SaraJewel

viccat said:


> Thanks for the update green. Interesting to hear that the NHS IVF assistance cuts off at age 40. I still don't feel like I want to go down that route, but at least now I know I need to think about it before then! I never knew there were NHS fertility clinics either ..... how naive am I? :blush:
> 
> Been quiet lately because we've been busy and I've been rather :nope: about TTC. I have decidedly fallen off the wagon in the last couple of months, drinking a bit too much and not taking my vitamins. The :witch: arrived at the weekend, in conjunction with the very cute niece and nephew which didn't put me in the best of moods.
> 
> On the plus side, I have been accidentally tee-total for the last week, and am feeling more focused about getting back on vitamins etc. so I am gearing up to be super-positive again. OH and I talked about going to the doctors again yesterday - just need to make the appointment now.

I feel the same Viccat, quite :nope:about ttc. Just assume I'll get AF each month, started :witch: today, and just feel like "whatever"........... 

I made appointment with GP today. Don't really know what to say........ "hey, I'm 39, know I'm probably too old to have kids, but just thought I'd come to see what my options are.......... Oh and OH and I prob don't have enough sex, and tho most of the time he can finish, he still can't sometimes!". All that in 10 mins????? I think she will see me as a total waste of time...............

Hmmm, not feeling really positive! How is everyone else?:hugs:


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## viccat

SaraJewel said:


> I feel the same Viccat, quite :nope:about ttc. Just assume I'll get AF each month, started :witch: today, and just feel like "whatever"...........
> 
> I made appointment with GP today. Don't really know what to say........ "hey, I'm 39, know I'm probably too old to have kids, but just thought I'd come to see what my options are.......... Oh and OH and I prob don't have enough sex, and tho most of the time he can finish, he still can't sometimes!". All that in 10 mins????? I think she will see me as a total waste of time...............
> 
> Hmmm, not feeling really positive! How is everyone else?:hugs:

Not good either. This month we have DTD the grand total of zero times. It would quite literally have to be a miraculous conception.

More scary is that I have not been bothered enough to pester to BD at least once in the window. I have also pretty much stopped using the CB monitor. TTC is third on the list for the GP after looking at a dodgy mole and doing a smear test. :roll:

I am enjoying my work (which is very busy) and planning the house purchase. My cat has been ill recently so my spare time and energy is about trying to sort her out.

Bizarrely though, I've been teetotal for 3 weeks now :coffee: Perhaps new year, new start?

So....... when is your GP appointment SJ?


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## janey211

Hi Ladies.

Just wanted to let you know that I am still checking in on you and hoping for good news soon. I can see from your posts that AI still isn't in play for you regularly. PLEASE start now!!!! It works!

anyway, always thining of you guys and hoping for good news. :thumbup:


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## HPMINI

viccat and sarajewel - and others too.

Just wanted to say I had exactly the same concerns you did but just to let you know that at the age of 39 and 5 months, on 2nd December at 6.07am I gave birth to Thomas Anthony weighing 7lb 4oz!


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> viccat and sarajewel - and others too.
> 
> Just wanted to say I had exactly the same concerns you did but just to let you know that at the age of 39 and 5 months, on 2nd December at 6.07am I gave birth to Thomas Anthony weighing 7lb 4oz!

AMAZING!!!! Congratulations x x x :happydance:

Well I have news of my own........... Turns out it wasn't :witch:starting after all, spotting stopped pretty much straight away.................

Waited til was a week late (agonising) and got :bfp: on Wednesday!!!!!!

It feels really unreal but exciting but then scary too!!!


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## gustav72

Sarajewel!! That's amazing news!!! so happy for you...CONGRATULATIONS!!!


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## Zeri

Awesome Sara Jewel! Wow, such great news! You must be so excited! How did your DH react?

Also, if I can ask, which days did you BD?


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## SaraJewel

Zeri said:


> Awesome Sara Jewel! Wow, such great news! You must be so excited! How did your DH react?
> 
> Also, if I can ask, which days did you BD?

Thanks! I think I am still in shock!

He's really really happy!

BD CD10, CD12, CD14. Was a record number in the fertile period for us, did the trick!


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## Zeri

Awesome!!! Hope you have a happy and healthy 9 months!!


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## greenjelly

Sara Jewel! That is fantastic news. Congratulations. So well deserved. A long thread all thanks to you. 7 BFPs now is it? Wow! Keep healthy and enjoy! 
And keep us posted on how you are feeling. 
xxxx


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## greenjelly

I meant to ask Sara, any symptoms that made you suspicious? xxx


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## SaraJewel

greenjelly said:


> I meant to ask Sara, any symptoms that made you suspicious? xxx

Hi Green and thanks! 

It's 6 BFPs, I'm the 6th! Still feels like it's not real! 

I think my BBs were slightly more tender than usual but they vary from cycle to cycle. I had spotting on CD31 which lasted only an hour or something. Then cramps like AF was about to start CD32 and 33 and off and on since then with a bit of acid indigestion thrown in for measure!

Feeling a bit tired but nothing like people have described.

Will be 6 weeks tomorrow. Main symptom has been acid indigestion/heartburn type feeling.

Good luck to everyone :hugs:


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## lexus15

Well done & huge congratulations ladies..very inspiring as my OH has a low sex drive! Fingers crossed for the rest of us.x :)


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## smurfy

Katherine1209 said:


> Hi Gustav,
> My OH uses viagra regularly and he doesn't really like to dtd without it now, he says it makes him feel like he's 20 again...lol and it really took the pressure off maintaining erection for him, it just stays up regardless :rofl:...and it totally worked for us this last month...we did only dtd once this last cycle too! And he gets his online so didnt have to go to dr...

Congratulations, i hope all is going well for you. Can I ask when you DTD in terms of your ovulation day, not sure if you used opks or not thanks


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## janey211

SARA SARA SARA...I am so excited for you!!!! Sending you a HUGE congratulations your way.


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## HPMINI

Well done Sarajewel! Really pleased for you!


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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> Well done Sarajewel! Really pleased for you!

Me too! Thank you, although it all started to get better when I took your approach of telling OH when was a "good" week, so thank you very much for your advice x

I hope you are enjoying being a Mum, must feel so strange!!!:hugs:


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## viccat

HPMINI said:


> viccat and sarajewel - and others too.
> 
> Just wanted to say I had exactly the same concerns you did but just to let you know that at the age of 39 and 5 months, on 2nd December at 6.07am I gave birth to Thomas Anthony weighing 7lb 4oz!

Awwwww .... congratulations HP - really pleased for you. What a fantastic Christmas present! :cloud9:



SaraJewel said:


> Well I have news of my own........... Turns out it wasn't :witch:starting after all, spotting stopped pretty much straight away.................
> 
> Waited til was a week late (agonising) and got :bfp: on Wednesday!!!!!!
> 
> It feels really unreal but exciting but then scary too!!!

OMG!!! I really didn't think it was your month after your last post. Brilliant news SJ!!!!! I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for a happy and healthy 9 months. :happydance:


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## kelly1973

sara just popped in ahd yessssssssssssss you go girl over the moon for you bloody brilliant xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## kelly1973

wow this thread is quiet xxx


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## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> wow this thread is quiet xxx

I know!

Keep it going girls, this thread kept me going when everything felt completely hopeless........


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## kelly1973

happy new year ladies xxxxxxxx how you feeling sara xxxxxxxx


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## HPMINI

Hi all

Being a mum is great but I'm not going to lie, so tiring!! Fun though!

Thomas is doing well and has a good set of lungs. He is so worth it!


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## kelly1973

so glad hp can we see some pics xxx


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## HPMINI

I'll try and upload one or two!


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## HPMINI

:happydance:
 



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## SaraJewel

HPMINI said:


> :happydance:

Oh wow he is so cute!!!!!

I am doing fine thank you Kelly. A bit queasy/tired at times but otherwise OK!

How is everyone doing?

I don't think this is the place for pregnancy chat.

Maybe this thread will fade away naturally, but if anyone is having the difficulties/stresses I had, I can say I found it very supportive to know others are going through the same thing :hugs: It gave me a lot of hope.


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## kelly1973

hp hes adorable xxxxx


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## HPMINI

Thanks! I am biased but he is very beautiful and currently asleep! It's exhausting but worth it! Good luck with yours Kelly! 

Sara - now the title indicates how many bfp's we've had I think, personally, that it's ok to talk!

And if people find it supportive it's all good!


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## smurfy

HPMINI said:


> Thanks! I am biased but he is very beautiful and currently asleep! It's exhausting but worth it! Good luck with yours Kelly!
> 
> Sara - now the title indicates how many bfp's we've had I think, personally, that it's ok to talk!
> 
> And if people find it supportive it's all good!

Congratulations to all of your who got your BFP, I hope your pregnancies go well and very healthy. I have tried going through the posts but cant see your road to BFP, would a few of you mind sharing these with us, ie opk, when DTD etc what was different, thank you


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## HPMINI

I used a Clear Blue Fertility Monitor but rather than focus on the 48 hour window I would tell my husband when it was a good week.
 



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## Katherine1209

I havent been online for quite some time but wanted to pop in and say hi to you all...
Sara, was so happy to read about your bfp! And Green how are you going? Kelly, i cant believe ur 30 weeks already..wont be long until you get to meet your baby too!
Gorgeous pic HPMINI...he is just beautiful.
As for me, i am now about 16 weeks and tonight felt my first flutter...what a lovely feeling. I cried, not that that is unusual at all...it seems to be my main pg symptom, tears!


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## Katherine1209

smurfy said:


> Katherine1209 said:
> 
> 
> Hi Gustav,
> My OH uses viagra regularly and he doesn't really like to dtd without it now, he says it makes him feel like he's 20 again...lol and it really took the pressure off maintaining erection for him, it just stays up regardless :rofl:...and it totally worked for us this last month...we did only dtd once this last cycle too! And he gets his online so didnt have to go to dr...
> 
> Congratulations, i hope all is going well for you. Can I ask when you DTD in terms of your ovulation day, not sure if you used opks or not thanksClick to expand...

Hi Smurfy, i was using opks, which was positive on cd10 in the am, we only DTD once that whole month and it was on cd 12 in the am...part of me still cant believe it! In fact I really had no symptoms at all and only tested that night as my af hadnt come...sometimes its one or two days late anyway, so i wasnt expecting a double line! We had our IV appt all set up for five days later too!
I am about 16 weeks now and really looking forward to my 19 week scan.
Hope things are going okay for you x


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## Hyacinth76

Hello
This is my first post on the site, but this thread has been a bit of a lifeline for me whilst my OH and i have been TTC.
I'm so pleased to see the recent successes, and it gives me hope that it could happen to me.

My story is fairly straight forward. We've been TTC for around 18 months. Around 6 months ago we went to the Dr's to see what was going on. OH's tests came back with good results for his swimmers. My scans showed that I was ovulating frequently, but that I potentially had PCOS.
We were prescribed Clomid, and started to take it around 3 months ago.

My OH has never been very fussed about DTD, and so we've never had an active sex life. He often can't finish, which I think makes him want to DTD even less.
Since TTC we have been averaging DTD once or twice a month. 

My Dr prescribed 3 months of Clomid, and we came to the end of the prescription last month, with no success. I'm using the Clearblue OPK so that I can let my OH know when a good time to DTD is, as spontaneity isn't really his thing!

Timing has been a huge issue. We both work away from home a lot, and the ovulation window always seems to fall when one of us is away.

So this month I start my cycle without the Clomid medication, and the prospect of another trip to the doctors to speak with them about what we do next. We didn't mention the performance issues before, but I think as my OH can see the disappointment each month is bringing, that he might be willing to talk about it to someone who can help.
It all feels a bit much at the moment, and I am struggling to deal with this months disappointment. 

Sorry, that's a really long first post! Thanks for taking the time to read it.


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## HPMINI

Hyacinth - welcome!

All I can say is - keep the faith - don't stress too much about the window just about the right week. From what I can remember - I thought I had missed the window due to circumstances but obviously I didn't! My husband and I both work shifts so it was extremely difficult finding time!

I know where you are coming from with the disappointment and it does all get a bit too much but it definitely makes it more exciting when you achieve your goal!


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## janey211

Hello,

Welcome! We all understand your problem. My husband and I have the same issue. He never finishes and has now started to have ED problems. Due to all the issues, we decided to do at home insemination. Sounds weird but it took all the pressure off and ensured that we got his swimmers where they needed to be during the most important time. It took 8 months but we successfully concieved and I am due in July. It was much easier that I had thought and we got what we wanted in the end. I would have liked to do it the normal way, but after months of trying to get that going, it was just too much pressure.

If you want information on what we did, feel free to inbox me.


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## SaraJewel

Congratulations to all of your who got your BFP, I hope your pregnancies go well and very healthy. I have tried going through the posts but cant see your road to BFP, would a few of you mind sharing these with us, ie opk, when DTD etc what was different, thank you[/QUOTE]

Hi Smurfy!!!!

Well it took as around 18-19 months to finally conceive. I took a tip from HPMINI and started telling OH when the "good" week was, being a bit vague about it. I also kept an eye on my cervical mucus as always had a good run of EWCM so started to get to know my cycle well. I tried OPKs but I NEVER got a positive so gave up and to be honest they stressed me out. I also told my OH that no matter what happened he was more important to me than a baby and if it didn't work out we would still have each other. That seemed to take the pressure off. I did pile the pressure on at the start which didn't help anyone and we had 6 months or so with NO ejaculation!

Things gradually got better over the next year. The month we conceived, we DTD on days 10, 12 and 14 after ovulation. That was a record run of success for us! We also DTD on day 16 but OH couldn't finish, but it obviously didn't matter! I ovulated around day 14/15 by my reckoning which was earlier that it had been the whole time I'd been TTC. I think the stress threw my cycle off.

Hope this helps. Everyone says don't stress but that is easier said than done!:hugs:


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## smurfy

SaraJewel said:


> Congratulations to all of your who got your BFP, I hope your pregnancies go well and very healthy. I have tried going through the posts but cant see your road to BFP, would a few of you mind sharing these with us, ie opk, when DTD etc what was different, thank you

Hi Smurfy!!!!

Well it took as around 18-19 months to finally conceive. I took a tip from HPMINI and started telling OH when the "good" week was, being a bit vague about it. I also kept an eye on my cervical mucus as always had a good run of EWCM so started to get to know my cycle well. I tried OPKs but I NEVER got a positive so gave up and to be honest they stressed me out. I also told my OH that no matter what happened he was more important to me than a baby and if it didn't work out we would still have each other. That seemed to take the pressure off. I did pile the pressure on at the start which didn't help anyone and we had 6 months or so with NO ejaculation!

Things gradually got better over the next year. The month we conceived, we DTD on days 10, 12 and 14 after ovulation. That was a record run of success for us! We also DTD on day 16 but OH couldn't finish, but it obviously didn't matter! I ovulated around day 14/15 by my reckoning which was earlier that it had been the whole time I'd been TTC. I think the stress threw my cycle off.

Hope this helps. Everyone says don't stress but that is easier said than done!:hugs:[/QUOTE]

Thank you i agree the stress can alter your cycle, weve had a lot of stress over the last 9 months, husband was pretty ill having tests in the hospital, then lost his job, now the last 6 week have been so much more relaxed and my cycles have gone from 35 days down to 30 and my pattern is alot more conistant now. Good luck with your pregnancy


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## Juniperjules

Hi Ladies, I posted in here until about October but have been MIA since then. My OH & I actually separated for about 4 months- we'd had a terrible terrible year & the Ttc with 'finishing' issues & doing diy AI didn't help!! 

But wet back together again. And feeling stronger than ever. We have an appt with the reproductive biology unit at our local maternity hospital next wed 10th April. We could keep going AI, and we might anyway, but I'm 38 & I don't want to just keep hoping. And I don't want the dramas/stress of last year to return. I'm hoping we're offered IUI straight up.. At least if we try that a few times we can decide if we want to move on to IVF. I'm banking on our only issue being getting the sperm where it needs to be!! Fingers crossed. 

I'm just hoping that I don't have to have any weird tests done.. Any kind of bloods I'm cool with, but anything more invasive I'm not keen on.. Do u think they'll want to do more than just bloods? 

So far my progesterone day 21 was good, & OH's semen analysis was good too. Really its the 'ejaculating' (tmi!) which is our problem... 

It's sooooo amazing to see so many of u are pregnant! Gives me hope ; )


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## greenjelly

SaraJewel said:


> Congratulations to all of your who got your BFP, I hope your pregnancies go well and very healthy. I have tried going through the posts but cant see your road to BFP, would a few of you mind sharing these with us, ie opk, when DTD etc what was different, thank you

Hi Smurfy!!!!

Well it took as around 18-19 months to finally conceive. I took a tip from HPMINI and started telling OH when the "good" week was, being a bit vague about it. I also kept an eye on my cervical mucus as always had a good run of EWCM so started to get to know my cycle well. I tried OPKs but I NEVER got a positive so gave up and to be honest they stressed me out. I also told my OH that no matter what happened he was more important to me than a baby and if it didn't work out we would still have each other. That seemed to take the pressure off. I did pile the pressure on at the start which didn't help anyone and we had 6 months or so with NO ejaculation!

Things gradually got better over the next year. The month we conceived, we DTD on days 10, 12 and 14 after ovulation. That was a record run of success for us! We also DTD on day 16 but OH couldn't finish, but it obviously didn't matter! I ovulated around day 14/15 by my reckoning which was earlier that it had been the whole time I'd been TTC. I think the stress threw my cycle off.

Hope this helps. Everyone says don't stress but that is easier said than done!:hugs:[/QUOTE]

How are you doing Sara? Feeling fine I hope? I started clomid this month...


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## melly2

Hi All,

I am in the same boat. My husband started having ED and performance issues starting about a year ago. I told him to see his urologist since he had testicular cancer two years ago and had a testicle removed; this issue got much worse after the surgery. He went to the doctor and found out that he has very low sperm count and now a failing testicle. So, even though at first I thought our issue was that we couldn't complete, now it's just a failing male fertility all together. I must admit, it is VERY frustrating. 

Good luck everyone!


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## tundralife2

Hi ladies. Mind if i join? I am 39 going to be 40 in August and my DH is 31 and active duty military. I have not been on birth control for 15 years. I have been diagnosed with endometrosis but no way to get rid of it as it just comes back. I have been on clomid for 3 months at 100 mg but this cycle I decided not to use it because it makes me insane and my periods hurt like hell. I tried reading all 60 pages of this thread but my eyes started hurting. I did see where some of the ladies were having issues with DH or OH in performing. My DH can "finish" the problem is he doesn't let me touch him. I actually thought he was gay if you want to know the truth. He could be naked next to me and I could reach to touch his private area and he literally would be like, leave me alone. Almost like something a woman would do. We started talking about ttc but then he would get all mad because he said it was like I was forcing him to do it so he wouldn't even come near me. I decided that I would not tell him when it is time and try my best to sleep naked or anything i could think of but sometimes it doesn't work because he isn't interested. He hates lingerie so i don't even own any. It's just hard to be so subtle when it's something so important especially with him saying he wants to have a baby too. I did test positive last night with my cb digital OPK and we did BD last night but it has been 7 days before since we bd last. I will try my best to get him to bd with me again tonight but I just don't know. If I wait until Sat or Sun that may be too late because I will have already ovulated and scared I won't catch that egg. I think men do feel pressured to be a man and like my DH said I don't have to do anything to get pregnant but he has to perform and be a man. I am thinking that he feels like if we don't get pregnant then he isn't a man and it's questioning his man hood. I don't know but I'm trying not to stress out but my eggs aren't getting any younger. 

Hope you ladies are all well and congrats on those who did get their BFP! I will eventually finish reading this entire thread to see how it all happened.


----------



## Juniperjules

tundralife2 said:


> Hi ladies. Mind if i join? I am 39 going to be 40 in August and my DH is 31 and active duty military. I have not been on birth control for 15 years. I have been diagnosed with endometrosis but no way to get rid of it as it just comes back. I have been on clomid for 3 months at 100 mg but this cycle I decided not to use it because it makes me insane and my periods hurt like hell. I tried reading all 60 pages of this thread but my eyes started hurting. I did see where some of the ladies were having issues with DH or OH in performing. My DH can "finish" the problem is he doesn't let me touch him. I actually thought he was gay if you want to know the truth. He could be naked next to me and I could reach to touch his private area and he literally would be like, leave me alone. Almost like something a woman would do. We started talking about ttc but then he would get all mad because he said it was like I was forcing him to do it so he wouldn't even come near me. I decided that I would not tell him when it is time and try my best to sleep naked or anything i could think of but sometimes it doesn't work because he isn't interested. He hates lingerie so i don't even own any. It's just hard to be so subtle when it's something so important especially with him saying he wants to have a baby too. I did test positive last night with my cb digital OPK and we did BD last night but it has been 7 days before since we bd last. I will try my best to get him to bd with me again tonight but I just don't know. If I wait until Sat or Sun that may be too late because I will have already ovulated and scared I won't catch that egg. I think men do feel pressured to be a man and like my DH said I don't have to do anything to get pregnant but he has to perform and be a man. I am thinking that he feels like if we don't get pregnant then he isn't a man and it's questioning his man hood. I don't know but I'm trying not to stress out but my eggs aren't getting any younger.
> 
> Hope you ladies are all well and congrats on those who did get their BFP! I will eventually finish reading this entire thread to see how it all happened.

Hi there, there's no doubt that making a baby can be very stressful. My OH has difficulty finishing but we think it's just bcos we've had sex this way for 18yrs bcos I never wanted to take the pill. Now it's like a habit he cant break. I mean maybe if he we kept going & going & going.... But that starts to get stressful bcos by that point the sex is no longer fun, it's mechanical & I start to get upset (thinking its my fault) & then he gets annoyed with me for blaming myself.. It's a vicious circle really. So for us, the better option is to just enjoy having sex & have him finish in a cup. Plus we're now waiting to see a FS & I'm hoping we'll do IUI. 

Your situation sounds difficult, but as long as your BD'ing & getting the sperm where it needs to be, then ur in with a chance! It can all be very stressful when u just want everything to work... But us humans are a complicated species! Even when u love & know someone well, these TTC issues can still be extremely hard to deal with. For both us girls & the men. I know my OH probably feels totally stupid that he has trouble finishing during sex.. But I'm doing my best to keep it lighthearted. Which is why we started using a syringe..

Keep ur chin up ; )


----------



## tundralife2

Thank you so much for the words of wisdom and advice. YOu are right, it's hard all together on both the female and male. My plan of trying to BD didn't work last night as he wasn't willing to do anything. He just doesn't want to do it period! :-( I know things will turn around. WOW! 18 years together? That's a long time. Congrats on making it that far! Awesome


----------



## ragae32

My DH has had issues with this too.


----------



## ragae32

https://bgrh.info/7.jpg


----------



## Juniperjules

It's quiet in here girls.. Anyone still around???? I'm on cd 3 today & starting to get excited/nervous about starting AI next week. It's our 18th anniversary of the day we met next Tuesday.. I'm hoping that might be our charm & we'll get a bfp this month!


----------



## tundralife2

I'm here and at 5DPO today. I feel okay about this cycle whether it happens or not. Only because we didn't get to BD when I wanted due to my hubby's military training last weekend. Ugh...wow 18 years together! That's a very long time. Congrats on that in itself.


----------



## kelly1973

hi to all the ladies that know me just wanted to update baby Daniel was born on the 31st march weighing 9 pounds 3 hope your all ok xxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## Juniperjules

tundralife2 said:


> I'm here and at 5DPO today. I feel okay about this cycle whether it happens or not. Only because we didn't get to BD when I wanted due to my hubby's military training last weekend. Ugh...wow 18 years together! That's a very long time. Congrats on that in itself.

Thanks for the congrats! Yep 18 years!... Hasn't all been smooth sailing mind you- we actually had a break for about 3-4 months & have just gotten back together recently. the time apart made us both realise we still needed each other even after all these years. Think my OH was having a bit of a midlife crisis actually (he's 44). And so now we're both desperate to get pregnant & make 2013 the best year it can be. 

I'm just hanging out, impatient to get some BD/AI done this coming week & get the ball rolling. Good luck with the TWW, it's frustrating when ur timing gets screwed up by outside things. I'm a nurse & work shifts & my OH works strange hours too.. All our best days next week are fri/sat/sun/mon.. & were working ALL of them. So we'll be trying to do this all around our stupid work hours! But we're gonna do it! I'm determined! : )


----------



## Juniperjules

kelly1973 said:


> hi to all the ladies that know me just wanted to update baby Daniel was born on the 31st march weighing 9 pounds 3 hope your all ok xxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Kelly, I don't know u but congratulations on ur new son! ; )


----------



## greenjelly

kelly1973 said:


> hi to all the ladies that know me just wanted to update baby Daniel was born on the 31st march weighing 9 pounds 3 hope your all ok xxxxxxxxxxx

Kelly! Thats amazing. Congratulations! How are you all? Your 9 months seem to have flown by - did it feel like that for you, or not! Thanks for letting us know. Im still trying... on Clomid now, first month but dont feel very hopeful despite the sore boobs which I have to keep telling myself is probably the Clomid giving me false symptoms. 
Juniper 18 years! Congratulations to you too! Fingers crossed for 2013! xxx


----------



## Juniperjules

greenjelly said:


> kelly1973 said:
> 
> 
> hi to all the ladies that know me just wanted to update baby Daniel was born on the 31st march weighing 9 pounds 3 hope your all ok xxxxxxxxxxx
> 
> Kelly! Thats amazing. Congratulations! How are you all? Your 9 months seem to have flown by - did it feel like that for you, or not! Thanks for letting us know. Im still trying... on Clomid now, first month but dont feel very hopeful despite the sore boobs which I have to keep telling myself is probably the Clomid giving me false symptoms.
> Juniper 18 years! Congratulations to you too! Fingers crossed for 2013! xxxClick to expand...

Hi greenjelly! I'm pretty sure I remember u from last year.. It's ur quote about 'eating cake' that feels familiar! : ) probably from this thread I guess! 

So ur taking clomid, are you having IUI or IVF? Or just doing a natural cycle?


----------



## greenjelly

Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything! 
And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!


----------



## Juniperjules

greenjelly said:


> Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything!
> And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!

Oh I hear u on the Facebook thing hon.. I actually deactivated my Facebook account about 2 months ago for similar type of reasons. I found myself way too many times ruining my day by looking at Facebook & seeing things that would get to me. I love it on one hand bcos it kept me in touch with all my family in the uk.. But it was seriously bad for my mental health some days! I work in mental health so I had to practice what I preach & decide that it is just a stupid Internet site that people mostly use to advertise how great or crap their life is..... & when I was having a bad day it could push me just a little to far into a negative place. So for now, I'm happy without it. 

On the IVF thing. I'm at a point in my life (38!) where I now realise I will never say never.. Until u are experiencing something firsthand you never really know how u will feel in certain situations. So if u decide to try IVF, then good for you. Only you will know if it's right to try. I hope the clomid helps & u get ur bfp soon. I haven't had that AMH test.. Bit nervous that the FS might want me to get it done.. I worry that if I get a bad result that I'll end up so negative & pessimistic that I'll give up. I've had a VERY difficult 6-12 months & have struggled with situational anxiety & mild depression.. I'm in a good place right now so I'd hate to get bad news & start feeling bad again. But I guess I'll cross that bridge when/if I get to it!


----------



## tundralife2

greenjelly said:


> Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything!
> And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!

Can I ask how old you are? I just had the AMH test done but haven't gotten my results back yet. I didn't realize they had such a test but I am anxious to get mine back. I'm going to be 40 this summer and my dr said she wanted to ck that because of my age. Just curious and I hope you don't mind me asking that.


----------



## tundralife2

Juniperjules said:


> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything!
> And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!
> 
> Oh I hear u on the Facebook thing hon.. I actually deactivated my Facebook account about 2 months ago for similar type of reasons. I found myself way too many times ruining my day by looking at Facebook & seeing things that would get to me. I love it on one hand bcos it kept me in touch with all my family in the uk.. But it was seriously bad for my mental health some days! I work in mental health so I had to practice what I preach & decide that it is just a stupid Internet site that people mostly use to advertise how great or crap their life is..... & when I was having a bad day it could push me just a little to far into a negative place. So for now, I'm happy without it.
> 
> On the IVF thing. I'm at a point in my life (38!) where I now realise I will never say never.. Until u are experiencing something firsthand you never really know how u will feel in certain situations. So if u decide to try IVF, then good for you. Only you will know if it's right to try. I hope the clomid helps & u get ur bfp soon. I haven't had that AMH test.. Bit nervous that the FS might want me to get it done.. I worry that if I get a bad result that I'll end up so negative & pessimistic that I'll give up. I've had a VERY difficult 6-12 months & have struggled with situational anxiety & mild depression.. I'm in a good place right now so I'd hate to get bad news & start feeling bad again. But I guess I'll cross that bridge when/if I get to it!Click to expand...

I was just telling Jelly my new dr wanted me to have that test done this week because I'm 39 years old going to be 40 in August. I never knew that test even existed but I am nervous about getting my results back next week. I just tested like an idiot at about 7-8DPO not sure which I am but I got a BFN anyways. I broke down and cried today while buying a baby gift for a shower I had to attend. I can't believe how emotional this makes you when ttc. It always seems someone somewhere either thinks you are crazy or are an emotional basket case. It can be very frustrating. I too deleted my fb as well a few months back. :thumbup:


----------



## Juniperjules

tundralife2 said:


> Juniperjules said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything!
> And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!
> 
> Oh I hear u on the Facebook thing hon.. I actually deactivated my Facebook account about 2 months ago for similar type of reasons. I found myself way too many times ruining my day by looking at Facebook & seeing things that would get to me. I love it on one hand bcos it kept me in touch with all my family in the uk.. But it was seriously bad for my mental health some days! I work in mental health so I had to practice what I preach & decide that it is just a stupid Internet site that people mostly use to advertise how great or crap their life is..... & when I was having a bad day it could push me just a little to far into a negative place. So for now, I'm happy without it.
> 
> On the IVF thing. I'm at a point in my life (38!) where I now realise I will never say never.. Until u are experiencing something firsthand you never really know how u will feel in certain situations. So if u decide to try IVF, then good for you. Only you will know if it's right to try. I hope the clomid helps & u get ur bfp soon. I haven't had that AMH test.. Bit nervous that the FS might want me to get it done.. I worry that if I get a bad result that I'll end up so negative & pessimistic that I'll give up. I've had a VERY difficult 6-12 months & have struggled with situational anxiety & mild depression.. I'm in a good place right now so I'd hate to get bad news & start feeling bad again. But I guess I'll cross that bridge when/if I get to it!Click to expand...
> 
> I was just telling Jelly my new dr wanted me to have that test done this week because I'm 39 years old going to be 40 in August. I never knew that test even existed but I am nervous about getting my results back next week. I just tested like an idiot at about 7-8DPO not sure which I am but I got a BFN anyways. I broke down and cried today while buying a baby gift for a shower I had to attend. I can't believe how emotional this makes you when ttc. It always seems someone somewhere either thinks you are crazy or are an emotional basket case. It can be very frustrating. I too deleted my fb as well a few months back. :thumbup:Click to expand...

Tundralife, (((hugs)))... If I had a dollar for every time I've cried over friends around me getting pregnant or giving birth.. I'd be a rich woman. I've sat & balled my eyes out many many times with my lovely mum trying to cheer me up & keep me positive. Even at work today, I'm a nurse & our maternity unit obviously had some kind of orientation for mums that are about to pop.. So on my way to the coffee shop I walked straight bang into a group of about 15 VERY pregnant women!!!!! And I find myself feeling quite.... Hmmmm... How should I say it... Well I guess I was sneering on the inside!! And actually thinking 'more bloody pregnant women!!'!!! Which I am a teeny bit ashamed of... But it's not personal of course.. It's just how I momentarily deal with the pangs of jealously & envy that I feel. I'm otherwise usually a nice caring person ; ) 

It's good that you've had the AMH test. I will have it if its offered. After all there's no point denying the truth.. & if there's a issue it's better to know bcos it might mean taking more aggressive action. 

Sorry about ur bfn. But I guess it's still early days too.. 

And I have to say.. I can't stand baby showers!! They are like torture!!


----------



## greenjelly

tundralife2 said:


> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything!
> And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!
> 
> Can I ask how old you are? I just had the AMH test done but haven't gotten my results back yet. I didn't realize they had such a test but I am anxious to get mine back. I'm going to be 40 this summer and my dr said she wanted to ck that because of my age. Just curious and I hope you don't mind me asking that.Click to expand...

Hi Tundra, I dont mind you asking at all. I was 40 last October. Cant believe Im 40 and a half now! Been trying for about 2 years now. I paid £80 to get my AMH done. I hadnt wanted to have it done for fearing of hearing (although not really believing I would) bad news but my acupuncturist suggested having it done as there are things she could do if the result wasnt so good. And it wasnt. When I saw the NHS gynae, she said they dont really go by AMH - if you are having regular periods, you are likely to be ovulating so its not a worry. Why does my egg never meet OH's men?!! Im about 11 DPO now after my first Clomid course, been temping every day like a thermometer addict. Ive been working away from home this week so no PG test which is good. I'm just going to wait for AF to arrive this week and Im pretty sure she will. 
What other options are you considering? :kiss:


----------



## greenjelly

Juniperjules said:
 

> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Juniperjules said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything!
> And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!
> 
> Oh I hear u on the Facebook thing hon.. I actually deactivated my Facebook account about 2 months ago for similar type of reasons. I found myself way too many times ruining my day by looking at Facebook & seeing things that would get to me. I love it on one hand bcos it kept me in touch with all my family in the uk.. But it was seriously bad for my mental health some days! I work in mental health so I had to practice what I preach & decide that it is just a stupid Internet site that people mostly use to advertise how great or crap their life is..... & when I was having a bad day it could push me just a little to far into a negative place. So for now, I'm happy without it.
> 
> On the IVF thing. I'm at a point in my life (38!) where I now realise I will never say never.. Until u are experiencing something firsthand you never really know how u will feel in certain situations. So if u decide to try IVF, then good for you. Only you will know if it's right to try. I hope the clomid helps & u get ur bfp soon. I haven't had that AMH test.. Bit nervous that the FS might want me to get it done.. I worry that if I get a bad result that I'll end up so negative & pessimistic that I'll give up. I've had a VERY difficult 6-12 months & have struggled with situational anxiety & mild depression.. I'm in a good place right now so I'd hate to get bad news & start feeling bad again. But I guess I'll cross that bridge when/if I get to it!Click to expand...
> 
> I was just telling Jelly my new dr wanted me to have that test done this week because I'm 39 years old going to be 40 in August. I never knew that test even existed but I am nervous about getting my results back next week. I just tested like an idiot at about 7-8DPO not sure which I am but I got a BFN anyways. I broke down and cried today while buying a baby gift for a shower I had to attend. I can't believe how emotional this makes you when ttc. It always seems someone somewhere either thinks you are crazy or are an emotional basket case. It can be very frustrating. I too deleted my fb as well a few months back. :thumbup:Click to expand...
> 
> Tundralife, (((hugs)))... If I had a dollar for every time I've cried over friends around me getting pregnant or giving birth.. I'd be a rich woman. I've sat & balled my eyes out many many times with my lovely mum trying to cheer me up & keep me positive. Even at work today, I'm a nurse & our maternity unit obviously had some kind of orientation for mums that are about to pop.. So on my way to the coffee shop I walked straight bang into a group of about 15 VERY pregnant women!!!!! And I find myself feeling quite.... Hmmmm... How should I say it... Well I guess I was sneering on the inside!! And actually thinking 'more bloody pregnant women!!'!!! Which I am a teeny bit ashamed of... But it's not personal of course.. It's just how I momentarily deal with the pangs of jealously & envy that I feel. I'm otherwise usually a nice caring person ; )
> 
> It's good that you've had the AMH test. I will have it if its offered. After all there's no point denying the truth.. & if there's a issue it's better to know bcos it might mean taking more aggressive action.
> 
> Sorry about ur bfn. But I guess it's still early days too..
> 
> And I have to say.. I can't stand baby showers!! They are like torture!!Click to expand...

There is a date in my diary for a get together with some good friends. 7 of us, 4 of them have 5 babies between them and Im not sure I want to go! I love seeing them all but its just going to be a baby fest. Im not very good with babies but I assume if I get my own, it will all fall into place! JJ, tough times with work thrusting PG women in your face! I am quite envious of baby bumps. I would really like to experience pregnancy. Im just a late developer and have come to the idea too late to make it simple for myself! JJ, have you tried IVF?


----------



## HPMINI

greenjelly - trust me - when you get pregnant and have a lo - it will all fall into place! 
Kelly - congratulations!!!! I imagine you are pretty tired right now! However, I assure you, when you get to about 12 or 14 weeks - you'll look back and realise how much easier it is then it was!

everyone - I really was just like you - and it still makes me cry how lucky I am when I thought it wasn't going to happen and when I see other people suffering.

Keep the faith everyone and it will be when you least expect it.

We have decided that Thomas will be our first and last baby however, personally I was reassured when I went to see the nurse at the surgery that she was talking about whether I was going to have another one. When you are only three months off 40 it is lovely not to be treated like an "old" lady!


----------



## tundralife2

Juniperjules said:


> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Juniperjules said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything!
> And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!
> 
> Oh I hear u on the Facebook thing hon.. I actually deactivated my Facebook account about 2 months ago for similar type of reasons. I found myself way too many times ruining my day by looking at Facebook & seeing things that would get to me. I love it on one hand bcos it kept me in touch with all my family in the uk.. But it was seriously bad for my mental health some days! I work in mental health so I had to practice what I preach & decide that it is just a stupid Internet site that people mostly use to advertise how great or crap their life is..... & when I was having a bad day it could push me just a little to far into a negative place. So for now, I'm happy without it.
> 
> On the IVF thing. I'm at a point in my life (38!) where I now realise I will never say never.. Until u are experiencing something firsthand you never really know how u will feel in certain situations. So if u decide to try IVF, then good for you. Only you will know if it's right to try. I hope the clomid helps & u get ur bfp soon. I haven't had that AMH test.. Bit nervous that the FS might want me to get it done.. I worry that if I get a bad result that I'll end up so negative & pessimistic that I'll give up. I've had a VERY difficult 6-12 months & have struggled with situational anxiety & mild depression.. I'm in a good place right now so I'd hate to get bad news & start feeling bad again. But I guess I'll cross that bridge when/if I get to it!Click to expand...
> 
> I was just telling Jelly my new dr wanted me to have that test done this week because I'm 39 years old going to be 40 in August. I never knew that test even existed but I am nervous about getting my results back next week. I just tested like an idiot at about 7-8DPO not sure which I am but I got a BFN anyways. I broke down and cried today while buying a baby gift for a shower I had to attend. I can't believe how emotional this makes you when ttc. It always seems someone somewhere either thinks you are crazy or are an emotional basket case. It can be very frustrating. I too deleted my fb as well a few months back. :thumbup:Click to expand...
> 
> Tundralife, (((hugs)))... If I had a dollar for every time I've cried over friends around me getting pregnant or giving birth.. I'd be a rich woman. I've sat & balled my eyes out many many times with my lovely mum trying to cheer me up & keep me positive. Even at work today, I'm a nurse & our maternity unit obviously had some kind of orientation for mums that are about to pop.. So on my way to the coffee shop I walked straight bang into a group of about 15 VERY pregnant women!!!!! And I find myself feeling quite.... Hmmmm... How should I say it... Well I guess I was sneering on the inside!! And actually thinking 'more bloody pregnant women!!'!!! Which I am a teeny bit ashamed of... But it's not personal of course.. It's just how I momentarily deal with the pangs of jealously & envy that I feel. I'm otherwise usually a nice caring person ; )
> 
> It's good that you've had the AMH test. I will have it if its offered. After all there's no point denying the truth.. & if there's a issue it's better to know bcos it might mean taking more aggressive action.
> 
> Sorry about ur bfn. But I guess it's still early days too..
> 
> And I have to say.. I can't stand baby showers!! They are like torture!!Click to expand...

it was a bit torture and the awful part is that there ended up being 2 other pregnant women who showed up. I didn't know them but they were friends of the girl we had the shower for. I understand your frustration quite well and the disappointment you feel when you see pregnant women. I find myself sometimes obsessing about it. When I do, i usually try to have a selfish moment and say "who cares" I'll just start working out harder in the gym, getting my tan on and trying to be more sexy lol. I try to think of things I could do for myself instead of ttc. Sometimes it helps. I've actually started working out a little harder in the gym. The crazy thing is when I start doing that in the back of my mind I think about if I am doing too much weights, what if this messes up implantation. lol So, in a nutshell this is just a VISCOUS cycle.


----------



## tundralife2

greenjelly said:


> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Doing it naturally. Been told I wouldnt be a good candidate for IVF as I have a low AMH. Kind of relieved because I have never wanted to go the IVF route although now my desire is getting stronger and stronger and I wonder if I will feel thats the only thing I can try next. CLomid has been fine but I dont feel anything apart from the boob thing. And temps a bit all over the place so I dont think I have had a miracle first experience on Clomid. Been working away from home this week and its been quite stressful which I dont suppose helps anything!
> And Im having a facebook day when all my friends are sprouting about how great their children are! Grrrr!
> 
> Can I ask how old you are? I just had the AMH test done but haven't gotten my results back yet. I didn't realize they had such a test but I am anxious to get mine back. I'm going to be 40 this summer and my dr said she wanted to ck that because of my age. Just curious and I hope you don't mind me asking that.Click to expand...
> 
> Hi Tundra, I dont mind you asking at all. I was 40 last October. Cant believe Im 40 and a half now! Been trying for about 2 years now. I paid £80 to get my AMH done. I hadnt wanted to have it done for fearing of hearing (although not really believing I would) bad news but my acupuncturist suggested having it done as there are things she could do if the result wasnt so good. And it wasnt. When I saw the NHS gynae, she said they dont really go by AMH - if you are having regular periods, you are likely to be ovulating so its not a worry. Why does my egg never meet OH's men?!! Im about 11 DPO now after my first Clomid course, been temping every day like a thermometer addict. Ive been working away from home this week so no PG test which is good. I'm just going to wait for AF to arrive this week and Im pretty sure she will.
> What other options are you considering? :kiss:Click to expand...

well i think i mentioned on one of the threads we are on together that DH is active duty military so I am very limited with what resources I have and who I can see. I have actually been refered to a specialist who comes onto the base a few times per month so that is better than what i have to work with. We can't afford IVF so I know that option is out and although DH wants a baby I know he's not willing to go that far. So, I'm not sure what we will do next. Just going to wait until my results from the progesterone and AMH


----------



## astito

Hi,
we have the same problem. I am 38. had a mc last year...


----------



## tundralife2

astito said:


> Hi,
> we have the same problem. I am 38. had a mc last year...

sorry to hear that hun. How are you holding up? Are you still ttc? :hugs:


----------



## astito

tundralife2 said:


> astito said:
> 
> 
> Hi,
> we have the same problem. I am 38. had a mc last year...
> 
> sorry to hear that hun. How are you holding up? Are you still ttc? :hugs:Click to expand...

yes, still ttc, but sometimes unsuccesfull during inside me...I always hold a soft cup under my pillow to ejaculate in it on his own:ball:


----------



## tundralife2

astito said:


> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> astito said:
> 
> 
> Hi,
> we have the same problem. I am 38. had a mc last year...
> 
> sorry to hear that hun. How are you holding up? Are you still ttc? :hugs:Click to expand...
> 
> yes, still ttc, but sometimes unsuccesfull during inside me...I always hold a soft cup under my pillow to ejaculate in it on his own:ball:Click to expand...

I'm sure that's frustrating for you both. I know that anytime I bring up anything regarding our sex life to my DH he is so offended and takes it personal. He thinks I am questioning his man hood. I don't think men realize that we could help them more than hurt them because honestly at this point sex really isn't a big deal to me. How long do you keep the softcup in?


----------



## astito

tundralife2 said:


> astito said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> astito said:
> 
> 
> Hi,
> we have the same problem. I am 38. had a mc last year...
> 
> sorry to hear that hun. How are you holding up? Are you still ttc? :hugs:Click to expand...
> 
> yes, still ttc, but sometimes unsuccesfull during inside me...I always hold a soft cup under my pillow to ejaculate in it on his own:ball:Click to expand...
> 
> I'm sure that's frustrating for you both. I know that anytime I bring up anything regarding our sex life to my DH he is so offended and takes it personal. He thinks I am questioning his man hood. I don't think men realize that we could help them more than hurt them because honestly at this point sex really isn't a big deal to me. How long do you keep the softcup in?Click to expand...

two or three hours. I think it is sufficient because sperm already can live in vagina up to one hour. is it right?


----------



## tundralife2

astito said:


> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> astito said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> astito said:
> 
> 
> Hi,
> we have the same problem. I am 38. had a mc last year...
> 
> sorry to hear that hun. How are you holding up? Are you still ttc? :hugs:Click to expand...
> 
> yes, still ttc, but sometimes unsuccesfull during inside me...I always hold a soft cup under my pillow to ejaculate in it on his own:ball:Click to expand...
> 
> I'm sure that's frustrating for you both. I know that anytime I bring up anything regarding our sex life to my DH he is so offended and takes it personal. He thinks I am questioning his man hood. I don't think men realize that we could help them more than hurt them because honestly at this point sex really isn't a big deal to me. How long do you keep the softcup in?Click to expand...
> 
> two or three hours. I think it is sufficient because sperm already can live in vagina up to one hour. is it right?Click to expand...

I don't know as I read all kinds of medical sites that say anywhere from 3-5 days depending on the environment in the cervix etc. Are you using preseed? That is supposed to help with that, especially if you are taking any type of fertility aids


----------



## SaraJewel

How are you doing Sara? Feeling fine I hope? I started clomid this month...[/QUOTE]

Hiya Green! Sorry for tardy reply...

I'm doing well thanks! Things gone well so far, both scans fine. Bit tired in first trimester but much better now! 24 weeks now, can't believe it's been that long!

How's the clomid going?


----------



## SaraJewel

kelly1973 said:


> hi to all the ladies that know me just wanted to update baby Daniel was born on the 31st march weighing 9 pounds 3 hope your all ok xxxxxxxxxxx

Congrats Kelly, that's lovely news he looks gorgeous!

Hope you are doing well yourself! 

SJx


----------



## astito

tundralife2 said:


> astito said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> astito said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> astito said:
> 
> 
> Hi,
> we have the same problem. I am 38. had a mc last year...
> 
> sorry to hear that hun. How are you holding up? Are you still ttc? :hugs:Click to expand...
> 
> yes, still ttc, but sometimes unsuccesfull during inside me...I always hold a soft cup under my pillow to ejaculate in it on his own:ball:Click to expand...
> 
> I'm sure that's frustrating for you both. I know that anytime I bring up anything regarding our sex life to my DH he is so offended and takes it personal. He thinks I am questioning his man hood. I don't think men realize that we could help them more than hurt them because honestly at this point sex really isn't a big deal to me. How long do you keep the softcup in?Click to expand...
> 
> two or three hours. I think it is sufficient because sperm already can live in vagina up to one hour. is it right?Click to expand...
> 
> I don't know as I read all kinds of medical sites that say anywhere from 3-5 days depending on the environment in the cervix etc. Are you using preseed? That is supposed to help with that, especially if you are taking any type of fertility aidsClick to expand...

live 3-5 days in uterus, not in vagina...as soon as they passes the cervix, and reach, they will be safe for 3-5 days...but they have to do their job in the vagina (be ready to long travel to the uterus) in 1-1,5 hour...


----------



## greenjelly

SaraJewel said:


> How are you doing Sara? Feeling fine I hope? I started clomid this month...

 Hiya Green! Sorry for tardy reply...

I'm doing well thanks! Things gone well so far, both scans fine. Bit tired in first trimester but much better now! 24 weeks now, can't believe it's been that long!

How's the clomid going?[/QUOTE]

Its ok, my message got hidden I noticed! Nice to hear from you. Week 24?! I cant believe it. Are you still working? Will you find out the sex of baby jewel? 
Feel fine on the Clomid. Im a day late so getting stupidly excited but have been this late before so it doesnt mean anything. I have a tummy ache which doesnt really feel like period pain but I expect it is... Im prepared for AF coming to stay. but wouldnt it be nice if she decided not to visit for a few months... :winkwink::winkwink:


----------



## tundralife2

greenjelly said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> How are you doing Sara? Feeling fine I hope? I started clomid this month...
> 
> Hiya Green! Sorry for tardy reply...
> 
> I'm doing well thanks! Things gone well so far, both scans fine. Bit tired in first trimester but much better now! 24 weeks now, can't believe it's been that long!
> 
> How's the clomid going?Click to expand...

Its ok, my message got hidden I noticed! Nice to hear from you. Week 24?! I cant believe it. Are you still working? Will you find out the sex of baby jewel? 
Feel fine on the Clomid. Im a day late so getting stupidly excited but have been this late before so it doesnt mean anything. I have a tummy ache which doesnt really feel like period pain but I expect it is... Im prepared for AF coming to stay. but wouldnt it be nice if she decided not to visit for a few months... :winkwink::winkwink:[/QUOTE]


FXD!!


----------



## greenjelly

tundralife2 said:


> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> How are you doing Sara? Feeling fine I hope? I started clomid this month...
> 
> Hiya Green! Sorry for tardy reply...
> 
> I'm doing well thanks! Things gone well so far, both scans fine. Bit tired in first trimester but much better now! 24 weeks now, can't believe it's been that long!
> 
> How's the clomid going?Click to expand...
> 
> Its ok, my message got hidden I noticed! Nice to hear from you. Week 24?! I cant believe it. Are you still working? Will you find out the sex of baby jewel?
> Feel fine on the Clomid. Im a day late so getting stupidly excited but have been this late before so it doesnt mean anything. I have a tummy ache which doesnt really feel like period pain but I expect it is... Im prepared for AF coming to stay. but wouldnt it be nice if she decided not to visit for a few months... :winkwink::winkwink:Click to expand...


FXD!![/QUOTE]

Thank you tundra. But I have some spotting. I fear she is packing her bags...


----------



## HPMINI

I used preseed - who knows how much it actually helped. It was good using it though. ;-)


----------



## tundralife2

greenjelly said:


> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> How are you doing Sara? Feeling fine I hope? I started clomid this month...
> 
> Hiya Green! Sorry for tardy reply...
> 
> I'm doing well thanks! Things gone well so far, both scans fine. Bit tired in first trimester but much better now! 24 weeks now, can't believe it's been that long!
> 
> How's the clomid going?Click to expand...
> 
> Its ok, my message got hidden I noticed! Nice to hear from you. Week 24?! I cant believe it. Are you still working? Will you find out the sex of baby jewel?
> Feel fine on the Clomid. Im a day late so getting stupidly excited but have been this late before so it doesnt mean anything. I have a tummy ache which doesnt really feel like period pain but I expect it is... Im prepared for AF coming to stay. but wouldnt it be nice if she decided not to visit for a few months... :winkwink::winkwink:Click to expand...
> 
> 
> FXD!!Click to expand...

Thank you tundra. But I have some spotting. I fear she is packing her bags...[/QUOTE]

Well, poo! Let's hope not. Is AF due today? I am due AF tomorrow or Saturday so our cd are close with each other. Maybe we can be bump buddies eventually!! that would be awesome. :happydance:


----------



## greenjelly

Yes please! Not this month though. AF arrived on Thursday... Clomid cycle 2 starts tonight... How are you doing Tundra?


----------



## astito

we tried to bd tonight but dh failed as I expected. He did his job into a softcup, and I have just inserted it into my inside. Hope it works:cry:


----------



## tundralife2

greenjelly said:


> Yes please! Not this month though. AF arrived on Thursday... Clomid cycle 2 starts tonight... How are you doing Tundra?


Guess we will be in the TWW together again Jelly...AF got me this morning and she's full force! Ugh hate cramps


----------



## greenjelly

tundralife2 said:


> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Yes please! Not this month though. AF arrived on Thursday... Clomid cycle 2 starts tonight... How are you doing Tundra?
> 
> 
> Guess we will be in the TWW together again Jelly...AF got me this morning and she's full force! Ugh hate crampsClick to expand...

Blooming annoying huh? :hugs: it means cd1 though so things can start again. (Trying to look on bright side) are you much over 35? I'm 40. And a half...


----------



## tundralife2

greenjelly said:


> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> greenjelly said:
> 
> 
> Yes please! Not this month though. AF arrived on Thursday... Clomid cycle 2 starts tonight... How are you doing Tundra?
> 
> 
> Guess we will be in the TWW together again Jelly...AF got me this morning and she's full force! Ugh hate crampsClick to expand...
> 
> Blooming annoying huh? :hugs: it means cd1 though so things can start again. (Trying to look on bright side) are you much over 35? I'm 40. And a half...Click to expand...

very much over 35! I'm actually going to be 40 in August. I am trying a few things different this cycle. I am taking DHEA, not to be confused with DHA. I am also using a different multivitamin and some fertile blend. I am not taking clomid again this cycle so this will be cycle 2 off of the clomid. My doctor wants me to follow up with an ultra sound because she saw a cyst on my left side and was worried about hyperstimulation from the clomid. I don't have the follow up until end of May==that sucks!!

Yea today is CD3 and counting. I will start using opk's around CD111 or 12 then try to trick DH in bd'ing with me. I figured out my LP is about 15 days. I'm about to the point where I am just fed up with it all. What about you? :hugs:


----------



## greenjelly

Yep I am completely fed up with it all. I feel a bit abandoned by my gynae. Been given three months supply of clomid but no checking on cysts etc at all. Im not due to see her again until June. I want to discuss my progesterone - what is the point of producing eggs if I dont have suitable lining to sustain a pregnancy. 
Ive got a headache which I am realising could be down to the clomid. Its bearable but not fun. Im only on CD4 but CM seemed quite eggwhitey this morning! Can Clomid cause that? Who knows where I am with things? What tricks do you use with OH then?


----------



## janey211

Hello everyone! 

Just wishing you all luck on your journey! Don't give up hope! I will happen!


----------



## tundralife2

greenjelly said:


> Yep I am completely fed up with it all. I feel a bit abandoned by my gynae. Been given three months supply of clomid but no checking on cysts etc at all. Im not due to see her again until June. I want to discuss my progesterone - what is the point of producing eggs if I dont have suitable lining to sustain a pregnancy.
> Ive got a headache which I am realising could be down to the clomid. Its bearable but not fun. Im only on CD4 but CM seemed quite eggwhitey this morning! Can Clomid cause that? Who knows where I am with things? What tricks do you use with OH then?

OMG I'm on CD4 today too. I started AF saturday. Tricks for DH is hard because he's not like most men. I just don't tell him when I am ovulating or that I am even still checking. I keep some in my purse at work only when it's around the time I am expecting a +. I try to intentionally avoid sex with him before then and then start easing back into my sexiness lol as it gets closer to O. I have been taking my OPK's the past several months so I know around the time I should get that +opk. The big problem is getting him to do it mulitple days in a row. He's only 31 too so I don't understand that. Anyways, I don't wear lingerie or any of that stuff because he thinks it's pointless. It's just frustrating that he is not cooperative sometimes and I hate keeping my secret of ovulating from him but he feels so stressed when I tell him. :shrug:

What's a girl to do lol????? I am not sure aobut the egg whitey...I get that milky looking cm in my cycle time but usually around O I get the egg white that is snotty. I know that's gross but it's true. When i was taking clomid though I didn't get wet at all. Maybe you can try preseed since you are taking clomid. I am off these next few cycles because I have that cyst. My gyn wasn't checking either but I was complaining of a constant nagging pain on my left side so she ckd and I had one, duh. I already knew that. :flower:

How is your day?


----------



## HPMINI

tundra -try not to be too exact telling him when the right time is - just tell him - next week is a good week. May cause less stress - maybe!

I was at the point thinking it would never happen - when it did!


----------



## Matin

tundralife: My husband isn't big on lingerie or maybe it's my feeling ridiculous that usually negates a lot of the turn on factor?

Clingy yoga pants and a skimpy tank top seem to be a fave. LOL ...How about music, massage, flirting?...for some weird reason mine likes to see me exercising of all things(almost as embarassing as lingerie) or post-workout & I'm heading for the showers, he's interested. :wacko:

Wearing something different, out of the ordinary? More or less makeup than usual? Different hairstyle? Going out on a date seems to put in a charge for my dh. If I think of anything else I'll add, ok.

I keep my Ov. & TTC jazz to myself too now. I didn't with #1 and things got weird. I think it was just TMI for him, less romantic,..& frankly, I got kind of bossy too.( I was 31 when we married and already freaking out about my age.) 

Oh yeah, I've read that the more sex guys have, the more they want it. Like a "priming the pump" sort of deal. Before we had #2 and had more privacy, I'd say it was definitely true. So there's maybe an argument against waiting for the fertile window only unless there a male issue. I need to go back and catch up with this thread.

Best of luck and babydust to everyone!!


----------



## tundralife2

Matin said:


> tundralife: My husband isn't big on lingerie or maybe it's my feeling ridiculous that usually negates a lot of the turn on factor?
> 
> Clingy yoga pants and a skimpy tank top seem to be a fave. LOL ...How about music, massage, flirting?...for some weird reason mine likes to see me exercising of all things(almost as embarassing as lingerie) or post-workout & I'm heading for the showers, he's interested. :wacko:
> 
> Wearing something different, out of the ordinary? More or less makeup than usual? Different hairstyle? Going out on a date seems to put in a charge for my dh. If I think of anything else I'll add, ok.
> 
> I keep my Ov. & TTC jazz to myself too now. I didn't with #1 and things got weird. I think it was just TMI for him, less romantic,..& frankly, I got kind of bossy too.( I was 31 when we married and already freaking out about my age.)
> 
> Oh yeah, I've read that the more sex guys have, the more they want it. Like a "priming the pump" sort of deal. Before we had #2 and had more privacy, I'd say it was definitely true. So there's maybe an argument against waiting for the fertile window only unless there a male issue. I need to go back and catch up with this thread.
> 
> Best of luck and babydust to everyone!!

Oh honey I have tried it all. At work I am very dressed up like he likes me to be in high heels etc...at home I put on yoga pants and little tank tops or even boy shorts and tanks just like he likes. (or have said he likes) I flirt with him all day by trying to send text messages or little things like that. I even tell him how incredibly hot he is but he just isn't interested. I personally think he has something wrong with his sex drive but he will not get checked. My DH is only 31 so too young to be doing that. Me on the other hand, I am in my prime! ;-) 

Even if we weren't ttc this would still be an issue for us but I never say anything to him. I only did the pressure thing once and I learned my lesson that he would def not budge with bd'ing with me. Thank you for the advice though. I love hearing different things that other people try.


----------



## tundralife2

Oh and wanted to add that we have date night every single friday night!


----------



## alison29

Oh you guys just reminded me of what to do next O time. A white tee shirt without a bra..I will save it until i need to bd in the middle of the week , next ovulation is on a thursday or a friday whip those puppies out and he wont know what hit him. The problem is that getting myself in the mood! Which is not so much a problem around o time but it is in the tww. There is something about nips that guys just can't resist (weirdos!) they are really kind of gross to me honestly like a pencil eraser.


----------



## Matin

alison29 said:


> Oh you guys just reminded me of what to do next O time. *A white tee shirt without a bra*..I will save it until i need to bd in the middle of the week , next ovulation is on a thursday or a friday *whip those puppies out and he wont know what hit him. *The problem is that getting myself in the mood! Which is not so much a problem around o time but it is in the tww. *There is something about nips that guys just can't resist (weirdos!) they are really kind of gross to me honestly like a pencil eraser.*

LOL!! Good one!(I'll add that to my list!):thumbup:


----------



## Matin

tundralife2 said:


> Oh and wanted to add that we have date night every single friday night!

You're lucky! If we get out alone once every month or two, it's a miracle!


----------



## tundralife2

Matin said:


> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> Oh and wanted to add that we have date night every single friday night!
> 
> You're lucky! If we get out alone once every month or two, it's a miracle!Click to expand...

We'll miss date night tonight but making it up tomorrow. I've tried that too...t-shirt no bra and panties or short shorts and obviously flirting. DH must have some kind of man hormone issue because he just isn't interested. I did have to tell him the other night that I feel so unattractive when he behaves that way and that if ther is something more I can do to turn him on, please share!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He can perform, that isn't the issue---getting him to do that is my problem and I've tried EVERYTHING, literally EVERYTHING :wacko:


----------



## viccat

Hi there - I thought I would pop back onto this thread, and saw you were talking about lack of dtd. I know exactly how you feel, and you are not alone! :hugs:

If you've got some time on your hands you could check out this thread too .....
https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/trying-conceive-over-35/1569389-lack-intimacy-dtd.html


----------



## Matin

tundralife2 said:


> Matin said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> tundralife2 said:
> 
> 
> Oh and wanted to add that we have date night every single friday night!
> 
> You're lucky! If we get out alone once every month or two, it's a miracle!Click to expand...
> 
> We'll miss date night tonight but making it up tomorrow. I've tried that too...t-shirt no bra and panties or short shorts and obviously flirting. DH must have some kind of man hormone issue because he just isn't interested. I did have to tell him the other night that I feel so unattractive when he behaves that way and that if ther is something more I can do to turn him on, please share!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He can perform, that isn't the issue---getting him to do that is my problem and I've tried EVERYTHING, literally EVERYTHING :wacko:Click to expand...

umm, let's see..what about
Ginseng? 
Hotels or other new/novel environments? 

Maybe he does need a check up. I've wondered about my husband too at times. Our low level of BD is a combo of my tiredness, children invading the room/bed until recently and him being prematurely oldmanish.
He's back and forth depending on what's going on in our lives(stress/health), how much privacy we get, moods, how flirty and/or receptive I am etc.

Overall, his drive is okay but definitely lower than my 1st husband's and other men I dated. When I'm tired, I'm quite grateful for that but when I'm charged up or wanting to try for a baby, it can be awkward. What's weird is that when I've been pg, we had sex quite a bit! I honestly wish I'd never even started with him and the world of TTC minutiae, I should've maintained some mystery there.

Since the 5 year old has finally stopped showing up in the middle of the night. I'm going to try for the 'prime the pump' tactic. We'll see if things improve further.:coffee: <---decaf


----------



## tundralife2

I'm laughing but not at you. It's because I can totally relate. My youngest son actually took a quarter and opened my bedroom door while DH and I were in the middle of it. Since DH is my 2nd DH he was so shocked and it totally ruined the mood. Now he's like stepping on pins and needles when the kids are around so I do understand that. However; we share custody with my exhusband (who totally would have sex in the car if I let him) and they are not always there. He has not excuse like that. He is active duty military and we usually are home by 4:30=5:00 pm daily so plenty of time. He just wants to BD on his own time and it's so dang hard to trick that man. Crazy but that's the truth. 

How long have you been TTC this time Matin?


----------



## tundralife2

Viccat- thanks for the link. I will check it out today.


----------



## Matin

*tundralife2*:haha:That is funny because we have some door locks like that, you can open them with a coin or flat screwdriver. Our 5 yr old loves that. LOL I hope your DH recovers from the intrusion soon!

We've just been trying since this February officially but we weren't always super careful during the TTA years. I can remember at least two or 3 cycles BDing on day of or just after seeing EWCM. It amazes me when I read about women getting pg using withdrawal or condoms. It's never happened to me and I haven't used BC pills since my first marriage.

That's my husband too: on his own time pretty much. He's a bit hardheaded in general. One weird thing I've observed is that if he notices I'm captivated by a romantic movie or a show with one of my fave dreamboat actors or musicians, he'll make a teasing comment (that the actor or musician is my boyfriend ..or he'll ask what happened to the other one I liked..I tend to cycle through celeb crushes)..but then often he'll be suddenly interested that night or the next morning. 

Sometimes I'll just leave a google image search/tumblr/fansite window open on my laptop. LOL It's crazy, like a subliminal threat? hahah As if. It's the same deal if we go out and I really look nice or another guy is being flirty or attentive. All of a sudden, i'm extra hot stuff. Whatever.:shrug:

....Playing music that we listened to when we first dated seems to affect him as well.

This cycle, I think I'm going to hop on the treadmill again when he's home around Ov. time. Sooo lame, I know, but I have to be stealth. Maybe put on "300" a day or so later. LOL I need to work up a little schedule of subconscious prompts.

....My ex. husband was like that"_(who totally would have sex in the car if I let him)_" too!... in a car, in a box, whenever, wherever. If that rel'p would've miraculously worked out, I'd have a bunch of children by now! but I'd be insane from being married to him so oh well. Such is life.


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## SaraJewel

greenjelly said:


> SaraJewel said:
> 
> 
> How are you doing Sara? Feeling fine I hope? I started clomid this month...
> 
> Hiya Green! Sorry for tardy reply...
> 
> I'm doing well thanks! Things gone well so far, both scans fine. Bit tired in first trimester but much better now! 24 weeks now, can't believe it's been that long!
> 
> How's the clomid going?Click to expand...

Its ok, my message got hidden I noticed! Nice to hear from you. Week 24?! I cant believe it. Are you still working? Will you find out the sex of baby jewel? 
Feel fine on the Clomid. Im a day late so getting stupidly excited but have been this late before so it doesnt mean anything. I have a tummy ache which doesnt really feel like period pain but I expect it is... Im prepared for AF coming to stay. but wouldnt it be nice if she decided not to visit for a few months... :winkwink::winkwink:[/QUOTE]

Hi Green,

sorry to hear about AF that is totally rubbish. I am keeping my fingers crossed for all of you ladies, I remember everyone telling me not to give up hope but I have to admit I did sometimes........

Green, we haven't found out the sex and yes still working for another 10 weeks!!


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## tundralife2

Matin said:


> *tundralife2*:haha:That is funny because we have some door locks like that, you can open them with a coin or flat screwdriver. Our 5 yr old loves that. LOL I hope your DH recovers from the intrusion soon!
> 
> We've just been trying since this February officially but we weren't always super careful during the TTA years. I can remember at least two or 3 cycles BDing on day of or just after seeing EWCM. It amazes me when I read about women getting pg using withdrawal or condoms. It's never happened to me and I haven't used BC pills since my first marriage.
> 
> That's my husband too: on his own time pretty much. He's a bit hardheaded in general. One weird thing I've observed is that if he notices I'm captivated by a romantic movie or a show with one of my fave dreamboat actors or musicians, he'll make a teasing comment (that the actor or musician is my boyfriend ..or he'll ask what happened to the other one I liked..I tend to cycle through celeb crushes)..but then often he'll be suddenly interested that night or the next morning.
> 
> Sometimes I'll just leave a google image search/tumblr/fansite window open on my laptop. LOL It's crazy, like a subliminal threat? hahah As if. It's the same deal if we go out and I really look nice or another guy is being flirty or attentive. All of a sudden, i'm extra hot stuff. Whatever.:shrug:
> 
> ....Playing music that we listened to when we first dated seems to affect him as well.
> 
> This cycle, I think I'm going to hop on the treadmill again when he's home around Ov. time. Sooo lame, I know, but I have to be stealth. Maybe put on "300" a day or so later. LOL I need to work up a little schedule of subconscious prompts.
> 
> ....My ex. husband was like that"_(who totally would have sex in the car if I let him)_" too!... in a car, in a box, whenever, wherever. If that rel'p would've miraculously worked out, I'd have a bunch of children by now! but I'd be insane from being married to him so oh well. Such is life.

thanks for my morning read! very entertaining and funny you should say that about DH because my DH will say stuff about guys on TV too. I say things sometimes to provoke him though because I love getting his pressure up a bit lol. 

Yea, I know the point about being with our old DH"s. I would be crazy too because it was long over before it was actually over but I do have 2 wonderful boys with him and that's what is important. We have been ttc for about a year or so and no luck. Not even a BFP of any kind. I am just now getting to the point where the military docs are checking me for other things. I will be haivng the HSG done if AF arrives this cycle but today I am only CD13. I should be O'ing in a few days. I don't chart and I did not buy any OPK's this month. I figured it would be less stressful that way. 

Right now he's busy getting ready for motorcycle season anyways. Perhaps I should put on my chaps with no pants under? I'm sure that would shock him and scare him at the same time lol 

Other than our weird Bd'ing DH's how are you? :flower:


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## Matin

tundralife2 said:


> thanks for my morning read! very entertaining and funny you should say that about DH because my DH will say stuff about guys on TV too. I say things sometimes to provoke him though because I love getting his pressure up a bit lol.
> 
> Yea, I know the point about being with our old DH"s. I would be crazy too because it was long over before it was actually over but I do have 2 wonderful boys with him and that's what is important. We have been ttc for about a year or so and no luck. Not even a BFP of any kind. I am just now getting to the point where the military docs are checking me for other things. I will be haivng the HSG done if AF arrives this cycle but today I am only CD13. I should be O'ing in a few days. I don't chart and I did not buy any OPK's this month. I figured it would be less stressful that way.
> 
> Right now he's busy getting ready for motorcycle season anyways. Perhaps I should put on my chaps with no pants under? I'm sure that would shock him and scare him at the same time lol
> 
> Other than our weird Bd'ing DH's how are you? :flower:

You're welcome! Sorry for taking so long to get back. I've been scrambling to find and take/eat: Soy Isoflavones, grapefruit for pre-Ov.(and then pineapple i've got cut and frozen for post-Ov.), Instead softcups, PreSeed lube. I've added this stuff to the multi-vit and extra folic acid.

Basically, things to do keep busy & hopeful as I have no idea if any of it will truly help. LOL. I took Vitex from like CD1to6 then started the the Soy until today. Next cycle i'll just do the Soy(I read that Vitex can exacerbate depression which I do.not. need.).. if I don't get pg this time. 

From the Vitex and/or Soy, my left ovary is throbbing(in a weird but not painful way) and today the right side feels weird and a bit achy too. I'm hoping this means that *something* is working. I've been trying to get DH to take some extra zinc in addition to the flax seed oil and the multi-vit he takes when he remembers to.:dohh:

I'm LOLing about the commando chaps. I'd think that'd definitely get his attention!! ...It'll be good to have more info from your docs, just to know, I suppose. It's hard because I've read/heard so many stories about women who got pg inspite of(in addition to the w/help of) the drs. opinion/analysis.

I'm not going to bother temping yet (just charting CM)& I'd love to not be obsessive about 'symptoms' in the 2ww. Easier said than done. I'm also trying to have a 'Fine if it happens, Fine if not' POV overall, more NTNP than TTC. Just wanting to 'Keep on Truckin':haha: and maybe something will come of it?


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## kelly1973

hi ladies how are you all sara how far are you??? thing are great here baby Daniel growing like a rash xxxx


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## Alex1812

Hi! I am totally new around here and I know this thread hasn't been active in awhile which kind of makes me sad cuz I would totally fit in here! So I decided to post anyway just to get stuff off my chest.

Dh and I have been together for three years we just got married in May...my first his 2nd marriage....and he had a vasectomy during his first. We had it reversed in February and NTNP for a few months...but I was talking about babies like non stop and I think it started to get to him...because it was like he couldn't finish....and I would end up in tears and he would feel horrible and it was so awkward and weird I would get very um depressed and he would feel like a failure. 

Then he went for a SA and we found out his counts weren't good...I didn't see the results and all he told me was they said his counts were not likely to produce a pregnancy....but he wouldn't talk to me about it and I was all depressed and crying...and every body around me I swear has announced that they'd are pregnant...I would be watching tv and see a commercial with babies in it and burst into tears....

I kept thinking great not only can we not 'finish' DTD there's nothing there even if he actually did...I was at a low of lows for me...

So I started looking around the net to see if there was anything we could do and I started reading about supplements...I had been taking maca to help regulate me cuz AF would pop in anytime she felt like it and I would never know when...but I started taking maca and I totally started up on a regular cycle...

Anyway I thought we'll if it can help me then maybe it can help him too...so

We finally started to talk and I asked him if he would take supplements and he said yes...and I did a happy dance of joy....so I started him on maca...and started more research....and now we are taking fertilaide as well...and let me tell you not only has he been 'finishing' but he is in the mood way more often and he is a lot easier to um....arouse....sorry if that is TMI...and I have also not talked to him non stop about babies...to take the pressure off of him....in my head is baby baby baby non stop....but he doesn't hear a peep about it anymore...unless he brings it up but that is not too often...

So I am keeping my fingers crossed...AF should be here sometime this week and I don't think there is even a chance bc I sort of lost track of stuff after the low count thing...so I'm sure our timing was off for my OV...so I want AF to just get here so I can OV and we can do some BDing....is that too much to ask for? Lol

Ok I am done with my long rambling post ...I have been reading all the posts in here and you girl's are very inspiring....hope everything is going good for you girl's!


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## kelly1973

hey alex how are you i used to post on here and had exactly the same as you i stressed my oh so much he couldny dtd hows things going are you poas


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## Alex1812

Hi Kelly...

Things are going good...I guess I am in limbo right now...waiting for AF to come and go...but I ordered some sticks from Amazon today and I am excited to start poas...Lol...

I'm still sort of new at this...we weren't actively trying to get pregnant before...it was more like me trying to figure out what days we should be BDing and hoping we would make a baby...now I am going to try the opk road to try and narrow it down better...does that make any sense? 

How are things he with you?


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## smurfy

Alex1812 said:


> Hi Kelly...
> 
> Things are going good...I guess I am in limbo right now...waiting for AF to come and go...but I ordered some sticks from Amazon today and I am excited to start poas...Lol...
> 
> I'm still sort of new at this...we weren't actively trying to get pregnant before...it was more like me trying to figure out what days we should be BDing and hoping we would make a baby...now I am going to try the opk road to try and narrow it down better...does that make any sense?
> 
> How are things he with you?

Hi Alex 

welcome, i would advice using OPK's if your situation as it does help take some of the stress out of it. My husband has a low sperm count ranging from 8-12m and it has really improved in 3 mths by taking the doctors advice of the vitamins (Vit C 1500mg & Vit E 600 iu per day), also reducing alcohol - so there are things you can do which can really improve in quite quickly also my husbands quality of sperms is really good too way above average in fact.

With a low sperm count they say to try and do every other day to help build sperm up. for the last 4 mths i am using the clearblue advance digital opks, they give you 4 days warning rather than just 2, as the track another hormone just before you ovulate too. They are expensive but at least last 2/3 months, you test first thing in the morning. 

Take it from me try to take the stress away from your DTD situations, since we have seen the fertility specialist i am now a bit more relaxed as i understand what is going on. Also stress is not good for sperm, we go for monthly/6 wkly massages and have some nice treats. I also try to use this forum for some of my venting rather than at my husband.

If you can I suggest you both go and see a fertility specialist together so you know exactly what is going on, both me and my partner have been at the same meetings. Next months i will be going on clomid to help increase our chances of catching the egg as not every cycle we ovulate.


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## kelly1973

yes getting to know your body and when you ovulate kinda makes you feel in control of the situation my oh was just the same and now I have gorgeous Daniel to prove it can be done and now were trying for another the key is don't say a word about babys sex is meant to be fun even though we all know because we want babys when we know the time is right that's all were thinking about but blokes don't think that way xxx


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## Alex1812

Well that sucks about stress being bad for sperm...my hubby stresses himself out all the time...he worries about everything...before he would agree to have the reversal surgery done he made me come up with a plan for a baby sitter for when I have to start working again...I told him he was being ridiculous because we didn't even know if the surgery would be successful you know? He didn't care he had to have a plan in place...he drives me nuts with his constant worrying and planning...:wacko:

I don't know....all of my cousins are having babies...there are babies popping out left and right at work...and they all make it look sooooooo easy...:nope: it seems like a daunting process to me and everyone keeps telling me not to stress about it because once you relax you will get pregnant...

So I don't know...I feel overwhelmed today...my mood is prolly caused by a fight I had with dh last night...I slept on the couch because I know how much he hates it when I do that...


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## kelly1973

alex sorry you are having such a hard time and I really do know how you feel we build our hopes up to such a rate when we only have these maybe 24 hour window to catch that eggy then spend the rest of the month worring that it will never happen, try to occupy your mind start a new hobby take up running that really helped me to focus


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## Alex1812

Kelly...

I always mean to tell you how adorable your son is...his picture just melts my heart and makes me smile...

I do need to take up a hobby...I need something to take my mind off of life...I might have to take up walking tho...I am in nooooo way in shape to start out running...but that is a really good idea...it would prolly help with the stress of my life... thanks


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## kelly1973

thanks alex trust me I couldn't run to save my life lol how bout swimming it will do you the world of good too forgive me if ive asked you already are you using opk


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## SaraJewel

Hi Kelly,

Just wanted to say congratulations on your baby boy! We also had a boy a few months ago and I am so happy. 

You quickly forget the stress of TTC, although looking at this thread again makes me remember! It was so supportive tho, and helped me to keep going while giving me somewhere to vent my frustrations. I'm so glad I posted here and hope the thread has helped/will help other ladies.

For me, the key was not talking a lot about TTC but also being casual about mentioning when a "good" week was (a tip from another lady on this forum) which took the pressure out of particular days. We DTD every other day on the "good" week and when things were working out again with OH, it only took a couple of months of good timing to conceive (although it took about 15 months in total but a lot of that was with no possibility of TTC due to OH never finishing). 

I tried using OPKs but never got a positive result with them so ditched them and looked at CM instead which was really reliable I think.

Good luck to everyone! x x x


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## kelly1973

congrats sara can we see a pic so pleased for you im ttc again I must be mad lol


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## Alex1812

Hi Kelly

I just bought some opks that I will be using for the first time this month...so we shall see how it goes...

Congrats Sara!


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## kelly1973

me too alex let me know how it goes hey maybe we will be bump buddies how exciting xx


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## Alex1812

That would be awesome!! Very exciting...let's hope this is our month...when are you going to start testing?


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## kelly1973

well I tested today look on my journal theres a pic tell me what you think


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## HPMINI

How are you all doing?


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## kelly1973

hi hpmini how are you doing this thread is so quiet now


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## greenjelly

Hi all! I haven't been present on here for a long, long time but this thread really did help me throughout my three years of TTC and... I would like to announce the 7th BFP for us! In my 12th week now, got my 12 week scan tomorrow which I'm hoping will boost me because I have felt pretty tired and sick for the last 4 weeks. (I'm not complaining because I know it's all in a good cause, I just can't believe I will ever feel normal again!)

In the end, OH performance wasn't an issue for us. My OH seemed to get used to the idea. :wacko: We just couldn't make a baby! No BFP ever. The only thing we did differently this time was I went to a new fertility acupuncturist. She gave me two treatments and Chinese herbs and lo and behold - three weeks later, no period and subsequently my first EVER BFP! So exciting! I continued with the acupuncture and herbs until last week (Had to give up the herbs earlier as just looking at the pot made me gag). My acupuncturist was brilliant and I wouldn't hesitate to recommend her if anyone is based in Hertfordshire. I guess the timing might just have been coincidental - who knows. TTC is a complete mystery! 

Anyway, good luck all. I got so fed up of reading 'It can happen, don't give up' but I guess those posts did give me a little bit of hope. I will hopefully give birth to my first baby before my 41st birthday. I had high FSH, low AMH and had failed on Clomid. My chances didn't seem very high and yet... 
I AM number 7!

Sara Jewel, thanks for setting up this thread! Hope you are doing well. 
love to all

xxxx:hugs::hugs:


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## kelly1973

hey green jelly fantastic news so pleased for you I too found out im pregnant again a couple of days ok so fingers crossed would love to see a scan pic tomorrow xxx


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## greenjelly

Thanks Kelly, and congratulations to you! This is number 2 yes?! Will that be your family complete? Nice to have the pressure off if so! 

Scan went well. Lovely to see baby moving and seemingly doing well. I feel the sickness is all worth it! Hope that feeling lasts when I'm next throwing up! 

xxxx


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## kelly1973

so pleased for you can you get a pic on here, yes its number two I hope this little bean sticks I had another miscarriage in nov yes then my fanily will be complete xx


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