# How painful was your miscarriage?



## sugrplum

Hi everyone, I was wondering how painful your miscarriages were physically and how far along you were. I was almost 11 weeks and the pain was the worst I have ever experienced in my life. I was screaming in the emergency room waiting to get a room and then for the doctor- I waited in agony about 2 hours before I got help. I had to keep running to the bathroom because my pads would fill every 5 minutes... it was horrible. The worst 2 hours of my entire life. I am not the type of person to show that I am in pain, I am very shy, but I lost all ability to care about such nonsence with the agony. I just cried and begged for help. Finally they gave me the strongest pain medication they had- dilaudid (hydromorphone) by iv. This still did not completely take away my pain, but it dulled it enough that I could tell it was contractions I was feeling... so strange. The pain finally lessened when I passed the gestational sac. My D&C was actually scheduled for that morning, so I stayed in the hospital and they performed it anyway to make sure nothing was left.

Anyway, I was wondering how normal this experience was and if any of you have given birth (I have not) how the pain compares to labor. It really scares me that labor would be that painful. I always wanted an all natural birth with no pain medication, but now I doubt I would be able to if it was anything like that. Of course you get a baby and are not devestated emotionally so I am sure that helps.


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## HappyAuntie

Hi Sugrplum - I am so sorry for your loss. :hugs: Your pain level sounds very similar to what I experienced with my first mc. I was at 12 weeks, and I also ended up in the ER. They didn't give me any pain meds until after I had passed the sac. (They eventually gave me demerol.) I am so sorry you had to go through that. I haven't had a live birth yet, either, so I can't say how it compares to that pain. But others have posted on here that the pain is much more bearable when you know it's leading to a baby. 

:hugs: to you.


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## lynne192

deeply sorry for your loss, my miscarriage at 11weeks 3days was my worse loss, although mentally my ectopic at 6weeks was worse, i guess it depends with each person my miscarriage at 11weeks was actually more painful that giving birth to my living son at 33weeks gestation, i am sorry you have had to go through this, i hope your getting the support and help you need at this hard time, i have been miscarriage/childloss support leader for 5years if you need anything at all please feel free to contact me 

Lynne x


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## aviolet

hugs for your loss :hugs: i think i was "only" 5 and a half weeks but it was extremely painful, worst pain of my life, and nausea/vomitting... i was so exhausted from the contractions and sweating puddles even though I wasn't wearing a stitch of clothing. seems to me it was quite severe for being so early in the pregnancy :cry: it started around 2pm, the worst of it lasted over 4 hrs, and then i continued cramping through the night, of course no medicine would touch it either :(


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## Kayleigh Lou

Hey,

Firstly I am sorry for you loss :hugs:

I was also around the 11 week mark. Mine started off as dull aches abit like period pains but increased to what labour feels like.I thought i wouldnt have much pain being that i was only 11 weeks. I also didnt know at the time that they were contractions.

I would say that this pain was worse than my other two labours. I think it was worse being i knew i shouldnt be in labour and the emotional pain of having no control over what my body was doing and there being only heartbreak at the end of it. 

I am sorry you had to go through this :hugs:

xxx


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## x_Rainbow_x

i was 10 weeks and i had medical management and it was very painful because the pills ruch the m/c and it was the whole m/c crammed into 6 hours. but i was in hospital with mine. it wasnt just physically pain mentally aswell.


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## NatoPMT

Big hug sugar, Im so sorry 

I posted this on bankie's thread the other day:

_both sets of labour i had, by the time the pain got so bad it stopped, i had thrown up and nearly passed out, on the Sunday i actually lost my sight for a few minutes ....at that point the contractions stopped and I asked the nurse why it stopped when i went for my pre-op, she said that the throwing up and passing out where my body going into shock and that stopped the labours. She said my body knew id had enough

i know what you mean, i think now that at least i know i can handle labour of sorts. i googled it when it was happening, and googled 'is miscarriage labour worse than labour' and found out that during labour, the pain of the contractions is your uterus trying to open the cervix. After 9 months of pregnancy, the cervix is ready to open, during some mc, the cervix is firmly shut so the contractions pain can actually be worse than normal labour. 

again, i dont mean to scare anyone, but i had NO idea what would happen (although it really doesnt happen to everyone - my cervix was very shut and the mc failed and i needed an op)
_

From what ive read on forums (no official type websites post anything about what happens) it seems that of those who have experienced both miscarriage and labour, some find it worse and some find labour easier than mc - many said that because of the circumstances of labour, its easier to deal with because its a happy event whereas mc is totally traumatic. 

i was so shocked when it happened to me, i didnt know what was going to happen and wasnt aware i was going to start having contractions so bad i would pass out and throw up

I hope you are ok and are recovering, its such a horrible thing to experience x


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## Lucina

I have had one at 5+4 and getting scanned tomorrow as there wasnt much blood at all and only minor cramping pain and they didnt seem to think that was right either. Hope everybody can recover from this and move on to happier times x


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## mlyn26

Gosh i'm pleased someone posted this. I was in agony with mine, doubled over the settee groaning in pain. On the Mon before the MC was confirmed on the tue by scan i had no sleep as in too much pain. On the tue at the scan they confirmed MC was underway but said pain and bleeding will get worse until i pass the sac which didnt happen til the thurs. Weds morning i had to demand pain relief from my doc as was so painful. Once i passed the sac the pain disappeared instantly. x


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## Mamabel

Hi, 

Just want to thank you for starting this thread. I miscarried on March 31st, and elected to have a D&C right away because we were about to leave for a vacation. I wasn't sure what to do, as I'm usually a natural girl, but after reading this thread I think I made the right choice. Still sore after the D&C which has me worried, so I am going to start a new thread on that. But, I was starting to second-guess my decision...which of course was made spur-of-the moment and when I was emotionally distraught. So again, thanks for everyone's comments on this thread.

mb


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## sugrplum

Thank you all so much for sharing your experiences. It breaks my heart that so many of us have gone through such terrible pain during one of the worst if not the worst experiences of our lives. It seems so cruel of mother nature to crush us emotionally and then physically as well. Btw I asked how far along everyne was just to see if there was a correlation between level of pain and that. Of course emotionally that is of little consequence and pointless to compare. 

Mamabel I think you made the right choice and many times I wished I had the d&c right when they found out. It would have prevented a lot of needless physical paid especially when I ended up having the d&c anyway. 

I am so sorry for each and every one of our losses :( I am so grateful for the amazing support here. You all feel like my sisters and I am so glad we have eachother when no one else truly understands. <3


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## Clo

I am sorry for your loss hun *hugs*

I lost my son Frazer at 23 weeks which is technically classed as a late miscarriage. I had to be induced and go through a full labour to give birth to him as my body didn't seem to want to start on its own. My labour lasted 2 hours and 17 minutes but it wasn't as painful as I thought it would be and I managed on just gas and air. My midwife told me that a labour at full term would have the some strength of contractions, the only difference would be in terms of when it came to actually push the baby out.Not sure if that would be the same for a natural miscarriage though.

Don't know if that is any help to you...


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## Jody98

I just went through a miscarriage and cannot believe how painful and awful it was. Everything I read before-hand seemed to talk about "cramping" similar to menstrual cramps and that is NOT what happened. The first thing I did when I got home was look on the internet and was comforted by all the stories out there so I thought I would share mine.

I went in on a Tuesday with minor bleeding but they couldn't tell me anything for sure for various reasons. I was scheduled for follow-up blood tests and an ultrasound a week later but on Sunday night started bleeding alot. At that time I had cramping but it was mostly the bleeding that made me go to emergency. When I got to the hospital and got out of the car after sitting for so long, there was so much blood gushing out that it soaked through my pad onto my jeans. But still, when I got to see someone they couldn't tell me for sure and I went home. 

Shortly after I got home the pain started and it was like nothing I have ever felt before. I couldn't walk, was curled up on the floor, crawling to the bathroom every few minutes. I guess it came and went but it hurt all the time so I didn't get any relief only less pain to agonizing, intense pain. I didn't go back to the hospital right away because I thought they would just say the same thing that I had to wait for an ultrasound. After a couple of hours though I couldn't take it anymore and went back to the hospital. They saw me right away and the doctor said I was definitely miscarrying and he cleaned out some tissue that was blocking my cervix. It was instant relief from the pain and I didn't require any follow-up procedures.

I am still dealing with the emotional aspects of the miscarriage but to be honest the pain is still so fresh that is what I have been thinking about. Nothing I have ever read or heard prepared me for anything like that, so I hope this story helps somebody who is in the same shock as I was.


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## Mummy of Ange

I was only 5 weeks and it was nothing more than a period, no pain nothing xx


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## broodyb

I.was eleven weeks but baby stopped growing at 6 weeks. Mine started as period pain so i wasnt even worried as ive heard people have periods while preg. Anyway the second day of bleeding id been out with bf got home. Then it came on very sudden i went for a wee and couldnt move off the toilet. My bf couldnt even get me to sit up as it was so painful. He cleaned me up n after ages i agreed to try move to bed. It was also the worst back pain i ever had i was havin trouble workibg out if it was my back or front that hurt. This lasted hours then passed. Then next day returned but not quite as painful. Its 2 n half weeks on n still bleeding so gonna have to have a d and c anyway after all that pain. Worst experience of my life


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## pinkflamingo

I was 6 weeks when I found out that I had had a mmc. i waited 8 weeks to pass it naturally and when it happened I had no pain whatsoever. I had suffered with 2 days of severe cramping pains several weeks before that, but literally nothing when I passed baby.

I am so sorry for everyones losses.

xx


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## Nat0619

Hi

I hope you don't mind me posting but I hope I can give hope to others reading this that it isn't always very bad.

I think I was very lucky physically - I had got to 13 weeks pregnant but :baby: only developed up to around 6 weeks :cry: I had medical management so not sure if this helped as it speeded things up (may have been very drawn out and painful if happened naturally maybe :shrug:). My pain was like period pain but was a fair bit stronger and longer lasting but still only lasted a few hours. My bleeding also was only like a period for a few days and then I just spotted for about another week and a half. I didn't pass the gestational sac until nearly 12 hours after the start of treatment and this was painless. I think the sac probably detached towards the end of the pains I had and then just had to work its way out :shrug: I was in hospital throughout all this and they kept me in overnight too as I passed the sac late at night so too late to go home then.

I do think I was very lucky and I feel for all you ladies who had a very rough time :hugs:

x


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## ms.hope

I was 22 weeks and let me tell you it was the worse pain ever--I have given birth and it was nothing like this I felt like my stomach was being ripped apart. I will never forget feeling that way and on top of that dealing with the fact that my twins had passed it was all so much and overwhelming.


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## Princesse

Hello All, I am sorry for all who are TTC, and have experienced a miscarriage. Brief background... I am 44 & have been TTC for one year. I was excited when I became pregnant naturally. Unfortunately, my joy was short-lived. I was 6W2D at the start of my miscarriage. My HCG level on 6/7/11 was 558; and only 578 on 6/9/11. On 6/12/11, I started spotting & rushed to the ER. I had a transvaginal ultrasound that revealed a completely empty uterus. HCG level was 622. On 6/13/11, I started clotting & rushed back to the ER. An ectopic pregnancy was suspected. I was given a dose of a Methotrexate injection to terminate the pregnancy thus, avoiding surgery. The injection burned slightly but not unbearable. Since then I'm experiencing overall weakness, painful cramps, passing clots, feeling weak & light-headed, & a sore throat. I follow-up on Friday to ensure HCG levels are dropping. Emotionally, I'm devastated & often feel depressed. My doctor says I can try again in 3 months, but I am fearful.


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## blueskai

i didn't get any pain until it actually happened, that's why I started comforting myself and believing that actually, my baby is going to be okay, especially after seeing the scan and the doctor telling me it'll all clear up.

When it happened it was awful tho :(

xo


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## CRWx

Hiya honey :hugs:

I lost both my LOs at 6+6 & 6+4, my first miscarriage was about the same pain as a period, it felt like cramps and the bleeding was bright red.. my second was slightly uncomfortable but nothing severe, completely different to my first.

So sorry for your loss! :( xx


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## thislife164

I was 8 weeks and it was bad enough that I had my fiancee drive me to the ER (2 hours away). The cramps were probably the worst pain I have ever felt.

I'm so sorry for your loss ((hugs))


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## aggiepup05

Hi hun I'm so so sorry for your loss. I lost my baby almost 6 weeks ago and I found it not all too terrible though still painful enough I shan't forget it. It was really really uncomfortable and I was crying and everything because I didn't know what was happening to me. I was doubled over and couldn't feel better but after I passed my little angel it didn't hurt anymore. I was still quite sore for a week after but it came and went. I just had to go easy, again I'm sorry for your loss xxx


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## T-Bex

I had a D&C after loosing my first pregnancy, and naturally miscarried my second, and I can honstly say that the natural miscarriage was as painful as labour with my daughter. With the D&C, I just felt sore, as opposed to pain. 

I don't know if that's the experiences everyone else had? :shrug:


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## Wildfire81

10 weeks, and this is the worst pain I have ever felt. They left me sitting in the ER bleeding and in terrible pain for 4 hours-so much for triage! I had passed baby before they got me back, and finally gave me two shots of dilaudid.


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## bex339

I had my miscarriage on the 31st May this year. It was the most painful experience of my life. It first started when i was sitting at my desk at work, completely unexpected. Thankfully nobody was around and i was able to rush to the bathroom. one of my close work friends came to find me and she rushed out to get me clean stockings and pants. It wasn't too bad then, i went home and my partner left work to meet me.

At about 2am the next morning i woke up in crippling pain I went to the toilet and was passing tonnes of clots. I tried to go back to bed but would wake every 5 minutes needing to go to the toilet again. By about 6 am i was fine and went to the doctors that morning. They told me i needed to have an ultrasoundwhich i had to wait till about 3pm for. By 5pm when the results were back and i was again in crippling pain and going to the bathroom every 5 minutes at the doctor surgery they told me i had to go to emergancy.

We rushed to the hospital and luckily i only had to wait about 5 minutes before being admitted. I had lost so much blood that i couldn't stand. I had a D&C that night. Before i went in they told me that the only bed that they had avaliable was in the maternity ward with all the babies. I told them i'd rather sleep in a corridor. Eventually they found me another room. 

The pain was all gone after the surgery but emotionally i am still a wreck. 

I don't really talk about it to anyone and it feels really good to get this written down and off my chest.


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## Twister

I mc in July and I was five weeks, physically I could cope with the pain. The only real pain I had was for a few of hours after the first hospital visit. It started happening when we left the hospital, didn't feel that bad to begin with and I'd been having mild cramps for a couple of days before. But it gradually got worse and turned into what felt like period pain, I get quite bad period pain as it is so I'm not sure if I was already 'used' to that kind of physical pain. It was bad enough that I had to sit on the loo (sitting on the loo helps me when I have cramps, probably a mental thing) crying and moaning but I'm like that when I get a period anyway, this time I was crying over more than just physical pain though. I think that was when my angel left me but it was so early I couldn't tell itkwim. All I know is that was the worst pain I'd been in throughout the whole miscarriage so I'm assuming that was it. 

Apart from those few hours sat on the toilet the worst I had were mild cramps in my tummy and back, although the evening and day after the toilet episode i was dosed up on paracetamol, and still felt quite uncomfortable. I'm just dreading my first period as I think it's just going to be a major reminder for me as it felt so similar. So sorry for everyones losses, breaks my heart that this is so common and us ladies have no choice but to be strong and deal with it.


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## lauren10

I seem to be the exception here, but I was 10.5 weeks and didn't have any pain at all. I was miscarrying on my own for about 8 hours...then they gave me a pitocin drip and some other pills to stimulate cramping to stop the bleeding. they expected me to be in pain, but I wasn't. I had an emergency d&c...and no pain after either. 

I found childbirth a lot worse..and I'm not sure why I didn't get any pain with my miscarriage - but I hemorrhaged pretty badly...not sure if there is any relation.

I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## Twinkie210

I miscarried at 7 weeks, but did not have a natural miscarriage, because my doctor didn't want to risk major bleeding so I had a D&C. But before I found out I miscarried, I started having sever back aches, that I can only compare to labor pains (I have an 8 year old son, so I know what labor feels like). the backache started while I was at work and got so bad I had to leave. I wasn't sure if I woud be able to drive home. Once at home I couldn't take anything, because I still didn't know if I was miscarrying or not. I finally had DH go get some regular strength tylenol, while it didn't help much, I had to try something. After that evening the backaches stopped and never returned. So 2 weeks later I ended up having a D&C.


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## shemoo

Hello all-

Yesterday I was 9 weeks, I think my baby was gone at 8 weeks, we couldn't know because the doctor couldn't see a sac yesterday, I had a transvaginal US and he said that he is sorry for my loss gave me some medication and asked to see me in ten days hoping that I won't need dnc. I left devastated with my husband it was just a confirmation , I have been bleeding mildly for a week and knew it was going to end this way and of course nothing would prevent it, I took progesterone just in case anyways, I started taking the pills yesterday my pain started today at 2 pm, and I have never felt this pain in my life I was home alone, I doubled, screamed and sat on the bathroom floor, I am used to heavy periods but this can't be explained , I kept crying and praying that it ends quickly at 3 I called my husband begged him to come home, I started puking and then something pushed out in my pad and panties and then everything stopped I couldn't get up I stayed on the floor I was battered scared and feeling very cold, my husband came and helped me up hugged me so hard, helped me shower with warm water brought me fresh clothes. I am still in pain but much much better than what happened earlier, I thank God that I was alone, I would have felt very ashamed if anyone saw me this way. I miss my baby, I know it is in heaven now, I feel very sad and am so down, my husband is supporting me that was my first pregnancy, I never thought I would get pregnant naturally. I thank God and I am hoping for another healthy pregnancy. Sorry for making this too long, I was just desperate to take it off my chest. I am sorry for all your loses and wishing you good luck on your next tries.

Take care all


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## lizzieredrup

When I had my natural mc in 2009 I was 7 weeks, I remember there was alot of bleeding and the cramps would come on in waves just like labour pains, mine died down as soon as I passed the sac which luckily for me didn't take too long! This time was alot different though, I went for my 12 week scan not knowing anything was wrong as i'd had morning sickness the whole time and no bleeding, during the scan we found out the baby had stopped growing around 7w5d and they also suspected it to be a partial mole so I had to have an ERPC on Tuesday.


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## television

i cant actually comment on miscarriage pains as it never happened naturally for me i had a d and c 2 days ago but have had labour pains and have given birth to my son which i actually found really enjoyable loved it yes it killed but you are holding something at the end of it that you love so its worth it.


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## lynney

television I don't think your comments are appropriate for this thread. We are on here to talk about the pain/ discomfort of mc and you are talking about enjoying labour & getting to hold your baby.

I have had to natural mc & waiting on the 3rd one to start, I find your comments upsetting for this thread.


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## MiissMuffet

Sorry for your loss huni :hugs: i lost a bub at 4 weeks, and even though it was very early (chemical) i was in alot of pain and passed alot of blood and clots and tissue. i was very surprised consiering i was so early. its not a nice experience for any one :( xx


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## MiissMuffet

lynney said:


> television I don't think your comments are appropriate for this thread. We are on here to talk about the pain/ discomfort of mc and you are talking about enjoying labour & getting to hold your baby.
> 
> I have had to natural mc & waiting on the 3rd one to start, I find your comments upsetting for this thread.

i agree


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## chickyhippy

I was about 6-8 weeks gone and mine started at abut 2pm and went on until about 11pm. I was screaming like I've never screamed before for help, hubby slept through most of it (git), but i was close to getting him to get me into hospital. I had contractions, which seemed to stop about 9pm, I went outside to chat to neighbour, felt better for standing up, went to loo and - sorry this may be tmi - had something the size of my hand fall out - first i knew i that I was even pregnant. had a bit more bleeding but then had major contractions after that the same evening and again about a week later. 

I had a 5 hour tattoo. That was NOTHING compared to this pain. I even thought about knocking myself out so I didnt have to deal with it, and I have a high threshold. If having a baby is as painful, I am having second thoughts.


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## MiissMuffet

chickyhippy said:


> I was about 6-8 weeks gone and mine started at abut 2pm and went on until about 11pm. I was screaming like I've never screamed before for help, hubby slept through most of it (git), but i was close to getting him to get me into hospital. I had contractions, which seemed to stop about 9pm, I went outside to chat to neighbour, felt better for standing up, went to loo and - sorry this may be tmi - had something the size of my hand fall out - first i knew i that I was even pregnant. had a bit more bleeding but then had major contractions after that the same evening and again about a week later.
> 
> I had a 5 hour tattoo. That was NOTHING compared to this pain. I even thought about knocking myself out so I didnt have to deal with it, and I have a high threshold. If having a baby is as painful, I am having second thoughts.

But having a baby is an entirely different experience hun. :hugs:


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## chickyhippy

But having a baby is an entirely different experience hun. :hugs:[/QUOTE]

good!!!


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## Twinkl3

When I miscarried in March at 8wk it was honestly the worst pain I have felt in my life. When I started to miscarry I felt no pain then whilst in the waiting area of the hospital I was cramped over but tried not to show any signs of distress to the other women. I had to keep getting up every 5 mins to change my pads and I was walking like john wayne as I kept getting large clots also (tmi) , the amount of blood was surreal and scary - yet I remained calm. Afterwards when I was at home I was doubled over again with a hot water bottle and ibruprofen, after about 3 days I went to the doctors who perscribed me Co-Drydramol (Strong Painkiller) and Metfanimic acid (They give this to ladies with heavy periods and reduces inflamation). I say for me the pain got bearable after a week (whether it was because I became custom to it) ... I went down the natural route and it was only in the May that I was given the all clear.


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## Penroo

its a week from my mc, I was 6 weeks I must admit I was expecting servere pain and bleeding but mine was more like a heavy period and period pains think in a way thats why Im finding it hard to believe I have had it. 
Im sorry for all the losses but fingers crossed we will all have our babies in our arms one day xxxx


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## Gingertea

I had a natural miscarriage on Tues 6th Sept. It began with dull cramping and escalated into something I can only describe as pain enough to make one pass out. My pain came in waves, with each peak having a clot come through. On Weds, bleeding was heavy and cramps were still there. On Thursday, no more cramps and lighter bleeding. Husband and I went for afternoon tea yesterday at a nice hotel just to relax after all that has happened and out of nowhere I started to feel pain - again. I was so confused I rang the GP. No available slot. I stupidly went into the local pharmacy, dazed and lightheaded with the sharp stabbing pain. I could barely walk and the pharmacist prescribed - would you believe it, a bowel relaxant. Husband then said we should just go to hospital as by this time, I couldn't breathe nor see properly. When we arrived, the queue was massive and I was told there would be a 2 hour wait. OMG. I felt all clammy and felt my lower abdomen sort of squeezing itself. I got to the loo and another big clot came out. I fished it out and - found myself staring at my sac. I couldnt believe it didn't all come out on Tues night. The pain was gone after this came out. I still had to wait for the docs to check. Apparently, my cervix was blocked and body was trying to expel the remaining bits of pregnancy tissue- that's why I was in so much pain.
Am better today, no more bleeding. On a scale of 1-10, I would say the pain I experienced during my miscarriage is 9 - comparable to breaking a bone or having someone knock the wind out of you.


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## blueskai

television said:


> i cant actually comment on miscarriage pains as it never happened naturally for me i had a d and c 2 days ago but have had labour pains and have given birth to my son which i actually found really enjoyable loved it yes it killed but you are holding something at the end of it that you love so its worth it.

Really don't think you should have mentioned how enjoyable it was giving birth to your son in this thread. All the ladies here, like yourself, have suffered a terrible loss, and many ache to hold the baby that they have lost. The labour pains of giving birth to a forever baby are nothing in comparison to the pain we feel everyday while we miss our little ones. We have nothing to hold.


For someone who has experienced a loss I thought you would have considered that before posting how wonderful your full term labour was.
Sorry if anyone thinks I'm out of order, I just completely felt like you were rubbing it in.


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## Hannah :)

Heya i've never posted here before im in wtt but i've popped over a couple of times just to have a little look after i had a MC at 5weeks in May. 
With mine i had no pain whats so ever, it was quite bizzar. Even the nurse who was dealing with me said she'd not seen many like it. It was just a heavy period with a few more blood clots than usual. For some stupid reson at the time i felt abit cheated though, it felt like if it was painful i would feel like a physical loss and be able to say goodbye properly but instead i had no pain and it felt like my baby wasnt even there. Obvs i know now that i was lucky to have no pain but it still niggles at me in the back of my brain sometimes :( 

x


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## Jenna1984

Hannah :) said:


> Heya i've never posted here before im in wtt but i've popped over a couple of times just to have a little look after i had a MC at 5weeks in May.
> With mine i had no pain whats so ever, it was quite bizzar. Even the nurse who was dealing with me said she'd not seen many like it. It was just a heavy period with a few more blood clots than usual. For some stupid reson at the time i felt abit cheated though, it felt like if it was painful i would feel like a physical loss and be able to say goodbye properly but instead i had no pain and it felt like my baby wasnt even there. Obvs i know now that i was lucky to have no pain but it still niggles at me in the back of my brain sometimes :(
> 
> x

This is somewhat reassuring for me. Currently waiting to mc after being told i had had an mmc last Friday. I am terrified of the prospect of how much it's going to hurt. Thank you all for your honest descriptions ladies, here's hoping it's not too bad for me :wacko: xx


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## HappyAuntie

Jenna_Boulter said:


> Hannah :) said:
> 
> 
> Heya i've never posted here before im in wtt but i've popped over a couple of times just to have a little look after i had a MC at 5weeks in May.
> With mine i had no pain whats so ever, it was quite bizzar. Even the nurse who was dealing with me said she'd not seen many like it. It was just a heavy period with a few more blood clots than usual. For some stupid reson at the time i felt abit cheated though, it felt like if it was painful i would feel like a physical loss and be able to say goodbye properly but instead i had no pain and it felt like my baby wasnt even there. Obvs i know now that i was lucky to have no pain but it still niggles at me in the back of my brain sometimes :(
> 
> x
> 
> This is somewhat reassuring for me. Currently waiting to mc after being told i had had an mmc last Friday. I am terrified of the prospect of how much it's going to hurt. Thank you all for your honest descriptions ladies, here's hoping it's not too bad for me :wacko: xxClick to expand...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Jenna. :hugs: How far along were you?


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## Jenna1984

Hi HappyAuntie,

Thank you. Found out at 12 week scan that we lost our bub at approx 8-9 weeks. Have found this site a massive help xx


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## HappyAuntie

Jenna_Boulter said:


> Hi HappyAuntie,
> 
> Thank you. Found out at 12 week scan that we lost our bub at approx 8-9 weeks. Have found this site a massive help xx

Hun, I don't want to frighten you, and you have to do what is right for you, but at 12 weeks I strongly encourage you to have a D&C/ERPC instead of waiting for it to happen naturally. 

I've had 3 mc. The first was like yours, a mmc diagnosed at 12 weeks, and I mc naturally. The second was at 8 weeks and I had a D&C/ERPC, and the third was just two weeks ago at 5 weeks, and I mc naturally.

My first mc was horrifically painful and traumatic. I wound up in the hospital because I was hemhorrhaging so badly and because the physical pain was far more than any acetaminophen or ibuprofen could handle - I needed the kind of painkillers you can only get in a hospital. Once in the hospital, I passed the gestational sac intact. Even though the baby had stopped developing a few weeks earlier, the sac had continued to grow and was a little bigger than a chicken egg. For something that large to pass thru your cervix, you have labor pains. It comes in waves and keeps getting worse and worse until the mc is finally over, and that could last hours (mine went on for ~ 8-9 hrs) or even days for some women. The pain was so bad I almost vomited in the waiting room. The psychological and emotional trauma of seeing the sac come out of me is something I am still dealing with 2 1/2 years later. 

My second mc was diagnosed at 8 weeks, and I was so terrified of having another natural mc that I begged the dr to do a D&C/ERPC as soon as possible - he was a saint and worked me into his lunch hour the next day so that I didn't have to risk another experience so painful and so terrifying. My 3rd was a natural mc at 5 weeks, and while it was painful, it was nothing at all like the pain of the mc at 12 weeks - it was more akin to really bad period cramps.

I know that for some women it's important to mc naturally - they feel it gives them a sense of closure. In my experience, though, there is no closure no matter how the mc happens. The emotional pain of losing a baby is the same no matter how the mc happens or how far along you were, and a piece of that pain will be with you for the rest of your days. You get no badge of courage for going through the physical pain as well. If I ever have another mc further along than 5 or 6 weeks, I will have another D&C/ERPC without hesitation. 

You are already enduring the emotional pain of losing your baby - please consider being kind to yourself and sparing yourself the physical pain as well. And please forgive me if I've upset you, these are just the things I wish someone had told me before my 1st mc - it might have made it less frightening if I'd known what to expect.

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## newmrsg

My first MC (chemical) was not too bad... It was like AF cramp x2.... My second MC at 7w3d was very intense... I have a hard time remembering exactly how it felt.. I think being so mental hurt it almost block out the physical part of it... But I do know it was very very painful :(


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## leahh

I'm so sorry to hear of all the losses experience by all of you ladies. I also experience a lot of pain in my miscarriage. I was approximately 7 weeks along. It felt like someone had stuck a knife in me as was slowly cutting. That might sound dramatic but I'm not sure how else to phrase it. I was actually on a return flight after just visiting my husband who was out of the country for a short while. It started right after take off and did not let up for hours. I just kept bleeding and was a mess by the time we landed but there wasn't much that could be done for it while I was in the air. Mercifully, there was no permanent damage done and I check out by my doctor shortly there after and was told I would be fine. That was a few years ago and now I'm pregnant again. I'm at 8 weeks now which felt like a huge hurdle, and everything is going well. I pray that it will continue.


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## me n tweek

i am currently in the limbo waiting for my 2nd scan to verify a mmc ... i should be 9 weeks but my first scan showed baby had stopped growing at 6 weeks. i am bleeding a bit with an odd cramp or two, similar to, but not really as bad as AF cramps. i passed a clot yesterday but none today. i will definitely opt for a d+c next week when mmc can be confirmed. so scared to go through the kind of pain described in this thread .... you ladies are amazing to be able to go through something so awful and come out the other side and be optimistic, and to share your stories with others. it helps some bit to know what to expect if it happens, as i think if it just came upon me without having read about all of your experiences i would totally freak out.
thank you, and i am so sorry for all of your losses (as well as my own)


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## cutebowsxx

Babys HB stopped at 8+4, but I was actually about 10 weeks pregnant. I chose the medical route, but a natural m/c happened before I made it back to the hospital for the second dose of tablets. So it started off at home, where I passed the baby, then I went in to hospital and passed the rest (more large clots and placenta).

The pain was bearable, to me it just felt like very bad period pains. The feeling before I passed the clots was disgusting, but not complete agony. I didn't realise how much blood/clots there would be, so all this made me feel faint, and i was so close to passing out. I was also sick once due to the shock. I felt extremely weak and was dripping with sweat :sick: However, I was in *extreme* pain once the doctor had to use forceps to remove the placenta. I was almost jumping off the bed with the pain. :sad1:

Lots of :hugs: to you all xxx


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## cutebowsxx

television said:


> i cant actually comment on miscarriage pains as it never happened naturally for me i had a d and c 2 days ago but have had labour pains and have given birth to my son which i actually found really enjoyable loved it yes it killed but you are holding something at the end of it that you love so its worth it.

Television, I don't find you're post offensive at all. To me, all you are explaining is how the labour pains were different to *your* m/c pains, which is basically what the first post asks. And I completely agree with you. I just posted a reply here, and quickly edited it because I mentioned the labour with my son!

Reading some responses to television's post are dreadful :nope: She's just suffered a loss herself and some of the comments would be really upsetting if it were me. We should all stick together and support each other. I completely understand many people would want to avoid talking about babies all together, but then other's don't mind, especially if you have other children. We all have different ways of grieving.

I would take the post in a positive way, because it gives hope for the future :flower: :hugs:


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## Stressbucket

Looking at this, I realize I was terribly lucky. I had a few hours of bad cramping for several days running, but it wasn't nearly as bad as my first period, which was a pure nightmare--or most of my periods through my mid-twenties, for that matter. When I was fifteen, I got off a bus at the wrong stop to throw up in the gutter because my cramps were so bad, so really, this wasn't much. Not fun, but not unmanageable.

Maybe it was just raw determination. Once I accepted what was happening, I was absolutely determined to avoid a D&C. I'm not sure why, just that the doctor mentioned it as an option, and I was just "Oh, HELL no, under no circumstances, I am going to go home and bleed in my own bathroom with the fuzzy purple bathmat, and YOU CAN'T STOP ME."

I just couldn't deal with any more medical intervention at the moment, although if it had been necessary, of course, I would have. As it happened, my hormones and my uterus cooperated with my whims (after crapping out completely on what I actually cared about, mind you).


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## blueskai

cutebowsxx said:


> television said:
> 
> 
> i cant actually comment on miscarriage pains as it never happened naturally for me i had a d and c 2 days ago but have had labour pains and have given birth to my son which i actually found really enjoyable loved it yes it killed but you are holding something at the end of it that you love so its worth it.
> 
> Television, I don't find you're post offensive at all. To me, all you are explaining is how the labour pains were different to *your* m/c pains, which is basically what the first post asks. And I completely agree with you. I just posted a reply here, and quickly edited it because I mentioned the labour with my son!
> 
> Reading some responses to television's post are dreadful :nope: She's just suffered a loss herself and some of the comments would be really upsetting if it were me. We should all stick together and support each other. I completely understand many people would want to avoid talking about babies all together, but then other's don't mind, especially if you have other children. We all have different ways of grieving.
> 
> I would take the post in a positive way, because it gives hope for the future :flower: :hugs:Click to expand...

If you're referring to my response to television's post, then I apologise if you feel I was out of order. However, I do feel that this wasn't the time or place to discuss how wonderful giving birth to a forever baby was, and in my opinion was not a response fitting for the nature of this thread. I completely acknowledged that she too had suffered a loss, and I guess that's why I found it hard to understand why she would write such a post, if she knew the heartbreak it causes.

Anyway, that's just how I felt about her post after being in a very dark place just over two years after my own loss, the exact reason I joined this forum. I didn't find it encouraging, positive, hopeful or uplifting, quite the opposite to be fair. But I apologise if you felt I was out of order.

xo


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## Dotty_B

I'm firmly in the 'most horrifically painful experience of my life so far' camp with this one, although having heard other peoples stories I still think I got off pretty lightly.

I had a MMC in December 2011, which started with an absolutely horrible sense of 'somethings wrong' from about 6-7 weeks. At 11 weeks I woke up with the exact stomach and back cramps which usually signalled AF was imminent, and that afternoon I had some bright red spotting. The cramps continued until the next afternoon but I think deep down I knew - I'd been right all along. On 11+4 we had the scan, where they said they believed baby stopped growing at 7 weeks. I was given all the options, but I was also sent home as another scan was needed a week later before they would 100% call it (something about the growth of everything being 0.4mm away from a 'viable' pregnancy). My brain had obviously caught up with my body by that point, as I started to spot brown blood that afternoon, and on 12+4 everything happened naturally. I woke up with what felt like AF cramps, which got worse. And worse. And worse. OH tried to get me to go to the hospital but I couldn't even face sitting in the car for the 10 minutes it would have taken to get there (and for some reason I was also worried about getting blood everywhere?!!? Like that mattered by that point!). A hot water bottle, pacing the flat, the strongest pain killers Boots would sell my Husband, standing in a hot shower, NOTHING even touched the pain until I passed the sac. Felt like a lifetime, but only lasted about 2-3 hours from start to 'bearable'. From what I've read that was a 'good' experience compared to others.

But even after all that, I'm glad I did it naturally. It showed me that my body knew what to do, and in a way it gave me a bit more confidence in it - in that it's not completely useless. I also think the fact I had a natural one is responsible for my periods returning to normal straight away, and now 5 months later I'm as regular as I was before. Everyone is different, but it was the right choice for me.

Big :hugs: to everyone who's been through this, and who is going through it. No one can tell you the right or wrong way to handle things, do whats best for you :)

D xx


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## cakelover

I had a MC at 11 weeks. I have painful periods where Im sweating and vomiting so I thought a MC pain would be tolerable in comparison. This is the first Ive ever spoken about it. The pain was horrific, and being sent away from the hospital when I started spotting and told to expect the miscarriage, to go through this "natural pain" was barbaric. The pain started days before It got really bad, and in total the MC took about 5 hours - started with contraction staged pain that no pain killers could take away. For the last hour and a half it was unbearable, sweating profusely with a raging temperature I couldn't call out for help let alone scream in pain, then came the violent vomiting which wouldn't stop. When I passed the "sack" it was a relief. I couldn't even hold my body up to sit on the toilet and was trying to hang on to the door frames. The worst thing about this kind of pain is that theres nothing at the end of it, no prize, and It doesnt seem to end either, 6 weeks later and Im still bleeding. The phycological repercussions are immense, but I think if women were given more help (painkillers) to go through the trauma of a MC then maybe the whole experience would be easier to bear. This whole experience has left me in awe of how amazing women are!! - we are all built to withstand the worst physical, and emotional pain that exists. we rock, and need to tell ourselves that in the mirror every morning!!  xx


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## FeLynn

I have had 3 losses. only one was a natural miscarriage so I will save you the details on the others.

I was waiting for my period to come from my 1st loss (mmc) 14 weeks no period I landed in the er due to horrible pains I was doubled over! I landed in the er again a week later still no sign of my period but I had a big bleed and a lot of blood clots. At the ER they told me I had an incomplete miscarriage so I was sent home to finish it out. We had thought the worse part was over and from looking at the ultrasounds and comparing we knew something wasnt adding up. 2 days later I started having bad back pains and cramping was getting worse and I had contractions and my vagina was hurting I could feel my cervix stretching. It was so horrible and lasted from 3pm to 4am the next morning when I passed a sac I was a about 5-7 weeks


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## amjon

For me it was comparable to labor (had an induced labor for stillborn at 27 weeks ). Labor was probably slightly less and Tylenol worked for MC but not labor.


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## 9jawife

Mine was comparable to a period as far as pain level, but then again my baby was "only" six weeks.


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## Kaylen

I just read all posts in this thread and decided to share my experience. I am miscarrying right now... We never found out how far along I was but my hCG did not go past 500. I think I was about 4.5 weeks when the first sings of mc started (this past Wednesday). On Friday I woke up and my entire body was hurting. I went to work but couldn't make it past noon. Then my doctor alled and said my hcg dropped and I was mc...On Saturday I started feeling these sharp sudden pains that would only last a few seconds but were very painful. No bleeding yet at this point. Then the next day (today) I started bleeding a big and passing tissue. And I am having a lot of pain - period like but a lot worse and the Tylenol isn't helping. So I am waiting now for it to be over - hopefully soon. I don't understand why it is happening and I am so scared that I will never be able to have a baby. We were so excited when we found out I was pregnant and only a week later I can't stop crying.


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## MumToEva

I have miscarried twice, one at 9 weeks and one at 8 weeks. The first one was painfully, but my overriding memory was how scary it was, as I naively expected it to be relatively painless, so I was totally unprepared! Having since had a baby, I would compare it to a mini labour - I was doubled over with contractions for about an hour, then it passed and the pain stopped. The second was completely different - just achy, like period cramps, for a couple of days with heavy bleeding, then I felt it pass without any contractions or further pain. Though I have my suspicions that the baby had died earlier the second time but just took a bit of time for my body to realise, which might account for the difference, whereas the first time I say a heartbeat on a scan a few days before the miscarriage. 

I wish someone had warned me about what miscarriage is like - then it woukdn't have been so scary.


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## Sakura_Saku

I had what must have been a chemical pregnancy back in February, and I've just found out today that I will be miscarrying any day now, since I was confirmed pregnant by test and u/s two weeks ago, then just went this morning to check the progress again by ultrasound, and the same little speck was barely even visible anymore...I'm guessing it must have stopped growing right after my first visit at 5 weeks. I'm at 7 weeks and a few days now, and terrified for the impending miscarriage....

Last February, I was found to have a gestational sac at 3 weeks (I have been getting more u/s than usual because I have a 6cm intramural fibroid and endometriosis that my doctor has been keeping an eye on), but my doctor said he didn't think it would make it. I held out hope anyway and waited through the next week. Sure enough, I started spotting liquidy, light pink while out for a walk, along with cramps. Since it was just around the time my period was due, my body decided to just go on ahead and let it go.

Even at 4 weeks, the pain was horrifying for me.
I was alone (it's sad how so many of us have been alone going through this, and the more I think about it when people start comparing labor pains to m/c pains - I really think the care, or even just standing by and looking after us of loved ones, doctors, nurses, our significant other - whoever is there while we're going through labor pains, might contribute to making it not seem quite as bad), and let it come as if it was just a bad period. Since I've got the fibroid and endo, I'm used to some pretty nasty periods, and I figured that since I was only 4 weeks along, it wouldn't be much different.

I was wrong. VERY wrong.

I spent about two days with the cramps and other looming signs that I would soon start bleeding, and on the third day, the pain became so unbearable, I did find myself on the ground rocking, and writhing in pain. The extra strength ibuprofen I was taking did not help. I can remember it started early in the afternoon, so It must have lasted about 4 or 5 hours, because by nightfall, I had managed to push out a sudden heavy gush, and felt almost instant relief. I also remember my pain sensors making sure the dopamine kicked right in, because once it was all gone, I started having the physical sensation of being calm, relaxed and soothed. Emotionally, of course, it was horrible, but I was glad to have my body come to my aid, since nobody else was home to give any comfort. I had the shakes and soreness in my lower back for a few days afterward, and bled lightly for a few days after that, but soon after that, I was pretty much back to normal.

So, while it did not become so bad that I vomited or passed out, it was still awful, and NOT something I want to deal with again....And that's why I'm terrified at nearly 8 weeks to go through this at a later stage. I'm alone, and live in a non-car friendly city, so if I had to go to a hospital, I'd be SOL unless I could get an ambulance to arrive. I also live in a foreign country where I'm fair enough with basic conversation in the language, but if pressed to speak while enduring screaming pain, I can pretty much be certain that I won't remember a single word. Yep. I'm not looking forward to it, and I'm sorry for everyone who has had to go through it. It's making me feel like I don't think I will even have the courage to try again because of the toll it takes on my body. I hope I can find some friends in you ladies, because I may really need you in the coming weeks as I endure another m/c alone.


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## sherstan

I miscarried about a week and a half ago. It started out as spotting over a few days, and the spotting progressively got worse by the 4th day. I started having back pain, and then having to have several bowel movements. The bleeding was worse during the bowel movements. By 2:30 a.m., the pain was also in the front and was intensifying so my husband drove me to the hospital. By the time I got to the hospital, I was in excruciating pain, which there was no relief from. They rushed me into emergency immediately, and did blood work. I was put in a room and started vomiting so the nurse rushed and got a doctor (luckily, it was a Sunday and not busy). The doctor put me on a morphine IV for the pain, as well as something for the nausea. Eventually, the morphine kicked in and the pain subsided. At that point, the doctor did a pelvic exam and pulled out the gestational sac. She gave me Tylenol 3s with codeine for the pain afterward, but I had very little physical pain after that. I still took the pills for a couple of days, though, just to numb the emotional pain.
This was the worse pain I have ever felt in my life and I hope to never experience that again.


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## peanut56

I miscarried just over two weeks ago. I wasn't far along, just over 6 weeks, but it was quite painful, more painful than I thought it would be (physically AND emotionally). I bled heavily for 9 days and had a lot of clots and terrible cramps.


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## aimze

Hi Ladies,

Just wanted to add my little bit - i'm hoping to give some hope to those who are awaiting a ERPC..

I found out nearly 3 weeks ago my little baby didnt have a heartbeat. Up till the scan I had not one bit of pain, I had no inclination my baby was dead apart from spotting..

I chose to have the ERPC as it didnt look like the baby would naturally leave for weeks or maybe ever. I had that on the Thursday after I found out on the Sunday I had miscarried. 

Still no pain, ERPC day and no pain, bleeding again but then when I went home I had a little bit of belly ache which was controled by paracetomol but nothing mayjor.

The worst pain for me has been the obvious emotional one, that and the migraine that hasnt left me since 1 week since the ERPC.

I hope you ladies are all as well as can be and i'm sending so many hugs your way xx


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## Kitsch

Mine was pretty painful, it was natural and I was around 8 weeks. I couldn't sit, couldn't stand, the whole of my lower body was just in constant pain and I didn't even realise it was contractions that I was having at first, as the doctor didn't tell me what to expect. I felt so weak from the pain that I just passed out on our sofa at one point and my OH fell asleep next to me from all the crying and frustration.


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## Babee_Bugs

Ooo after reading some of the comments here.. Not sure if I'm just one exception to the rule but...

I got to 8 weeks this time round and going through it naturally, I've bled quite abit bright red, with clots which were about a couple of inches in size...

But I've never once had any sort of pain! Not even mild period cramps, no dull aches, no back ache, no headaches, no nothing!.. Just bleeding. 

I bled for 9 days spread out over 24 days. Now I have just the odd bit of brown spotting.

Everything I was told, I was expecting a lot of pain.. So no idea what's going on :shrug:

I had a d&c in April and sooo wish I begged the doctor to give me another, the mental pain has been awful :(


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## Solfuego

I had 4 mis and in the process of my fifth, Two mis where at 6 weeks or so and where not that painful, the mis at 12 weeks was like labor pain and this one at 11 weeks is like labor pain. I think it depends how far along you are.


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## FeLynn

with my 1st loss in Sept 2011 I had no pain or bleeding until after the d&e I was suppose to be 11 weeks but gestational sac was only 5.5 weeks there was a yolk sac but no fetal pole. dr said fetal demise/blighted ovum. I didn't bleed much after d&e and it didnt last long.

With my 2nd loss in Jan 2012 I miscarried naturally. Its unknown exactly how far I was since I never got a period. Had sex in Oct and Nov. Drs and I agree I was at least about 5-7 weeks good possibility I was further. It was painful I bled a lot had a lot of cramping and clots. It felt like labor. The pain started on a Friday 8 days later bleeding started and I passed a large mass. 2 days after bleeding is when the labor pains started along with what was already going on. I passed another sac/tissue the following morning.

3rd loss didn't have any signs of a loss. I went in for a scan and my baby had just recently died. I was 13.2 weeks and that is what my baby was as well. I had a d&e at 14 weeks. Which I had lots of bleeding and pains.


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## daisyr21

I was told to expect bleeding like a period but heavier and stronger cramps.. Yeah, it felt like early labor. It took 5 days for my body to get going, I was spotting but not to much and then on the morning of the actual miscarriage, I began to get what I thought was contractions, having two other kids I was pretty certain that that's what I was feeling. They got to a point that they were coming every 40 secs to 1 minute. I decided to stand up since I'm one of those people that deals better with pain while moving around, and for some crazy reason decided that sweeping was a good idea LOL. The pain got worse and the contractions were lasting longer. I eventually passed a big piece of tissue I figured was the baby but then about an hour later and with no so much pain anymore I actually passed an intact sac with a tiny little baby inside. 

Honestly, if a woman is pregnant with her first baby and she unfortunately miscarries and they happen to have a pretty painful one, they are gonna think they are dying since they don't have labor to compare their pain with. 

It's nothing like they told me and I think they should give a better explanation or scenarios that could happen when they are telling you what to expect.


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## julie41point5

:hugs:


daisyr21 said:


> I was told to expect bleeding like a period but heavier and stronger cramps.. Yeah, it felt like early labor. It took 5 days for my body to get going, I was spotting but not to much and then on the morning of the actual miscarriage, I began to get what I thought was contractions, having two other kids I was pretty certain that that's what I was feeling. They got to a point that they were coming every 40 secs to 1 minute. I decided to stand up since I'm one of those people that deals better with pain while moving around, and for some crazy reason decided that sweeping was a good idea LOL. The pain got worse and the contractions were lasting longer. I eventually passed a big piece of tissue I figured was the baby but then about an hour later and with no so much pain anymore I actually passed an intact sac with a tiny little baby inside.
> 
> Honestly, if a woman is pregnant with her first baby and she unfortunately miscarries and they happen to have a pretty painful one, they are gonna think they are dying since they don't have labor to compare their pain with.
> 
> It's nothing like they told me and I think they should give a better explanation or scenarios that could happen when they are telling you what to expect.

:hugs:Hi Im so sorry to here your news, I too am expecting to miscarry, I got told 2 days ago that the baby has stopped growing, I am scared but at this time I am luck enough to have to very healthy children, 15yrs and 11yrs, This pregnancy obviously wasnt meant to happen, so everyone reassures me, Good luck to you with future pregnancies xxxx


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