# Best age to have a baby?



## amy_2

Hi everyone, I'm (almost) 23 and looking for advice on the best age to have a baby? Please vote in the poll.

Many people (including my parents) say to wait and get a career first. I am only just about to finish university this year. But I feel like I would love a baby soon, and I have a loving bf who is very family-oriented and has full time work. For me family comes first, even if it means I have less money. I just worry I will be throwing my life away if I have a baby young and I may live to regret it. 

But some women feel broody and can't help the way they feel. I don't want to ignore my feelings, they are natural and there for a reason. Do I follow my feelings, or listen to my parents?


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## aly888

When I got pregnant at 23 last year my first thought was 'im too young', but when I actually thought about it realisticely, I worked out that 23 was actually quite a nice age coz when LO is 6 i'll just be hitting my 30's,wich is nice. Plus, it also leaves time to have more :happydance:

As for the 'career first' comment,it can take years to build a successful career. and what is better in your opinion, to have children then focus on your career,or to start your career then interrupt it to have children?!
I personally would follow your heart,if that is what both you and your bf want. Its your lives :flower:


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## booflebump

I voted 25-28, firstly because thats the age range I will be ttc in. I have been broody for a long time, and while I would have managed if I'd had a child before, I think I am now in the best position (financially, emotionally, in a loving, stable relationship) to give a child the best start. I've lived my life the way I wanted for the past 25 years - and I'm ready to give my life to raising children now x


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## Amygdala

I don't think there's a "right" age for having kids. But I strongly believe that you should get certain things sorted before you plan a baby. Most importantly I think it's important to be as certain as you can that you are in a stable, loving and supporting relationship, are emotionally ready for a child and all the insecurities, fears, stresses that come with it and are in a place where you can support a child financially and have some financial security.

For me, that meant waiting until my late 20s. I've nearly finished my training (and already have an ok income), married my man, bought a house. But I think it varies a lot by what age you achieve that security, financially and emotionally. I personally know that I wasn't ready to have a baby, with everything that comes with it, before now. The thought of having a child is lovely and I've always wanted one, even 10 years ago. But life is never as perfect as we imagine it. And when I was younger I wouldn't have been able to cope with the "what ifs". What if the child is ill or disabled and needs 24/7 care for the next 20 years? What if my relationship isn't as stable as I thought and I have to support my child by myself? I also think it's important to keep in mind that children grow up. Personally I feel a lot better knowing that I have qualifications that allow me to have an exciting career once my kids are off leading their own lives.

Only you know what's right for you though and as long as your bf is happy to support you and a child it's up to you to decide what'll make you (and your future child!) happy.


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## aly888

Oh yeah, just wanted to add that there is no 'right time' and it all comes down to the individual. Some women feel 18 is their right time, some prefer to wait until their 30's. I guess your 'right time' is when you feel its right, and as boof says, when you are in a good position to give your baby what it needs!! :hugs:


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## aob1013

There is no 'best time'.


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## amy_2

Thanks for the replies. But I still worry about what my parents think, they have a very negative reaction to the thought of me having a baby. When I met my boyfriend my mum's only advice was "don't rush into having kids", and to "build a career first". My own mum didn't have me till 30 when she had already established her career, but she admitted she wished she'd still waited a few more years before having me :( Makes me think some people have regrets. 
My boyfriend is amazing though. He is fantastic with kids, and I know he wants kids and would be a great father. I couldn't possibly wish for a better partner than him.


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## booflebump

amy_2 said:


> Thanks for the replies. But I still worry about what my parents think, they have a very negative reaction to the thought of me having a baby. When I met my boyfriend my mum's only advice was "don't rush into having kids", and to "build a career first". My own mum didn't have me till 30 when she had already established her career, but she admitted she wished she'd still waited a few more years before having me :( Makes me think some people have regrets.
> My boyfriend is amazing though. He is fantastic with kids, and I know he wants kids and would be a great father. I couldn't possibly wish for a better partner than him.

Parents always worry about their babies having babies, no matter what age you are :hugs: Is your partner willing and able to support you throughout pregnancy and afterwards while you arent working? Whats your degree in? Perhaps looking for a relevant job and working for say a year before TTC might be an idea - then you will qualify for maternity pay and will have a position to go back to should you choose to return to work xxx


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## amy_2

booflebump said:


> Parents always worry about their babies having babies, no matter what age you are :hugs: Is your partner willing and able to support you throughout pregnancy and afterwards while you arent working? Whats your degree in? Perhaps looking for a relevant job and working for say a year before TTC might be an idea - then you will qualify for maternity pay and will have a position to go back to should you choose to return to work xxx




When I began my university degree I was 18. I thought I was doing the responsible thing by going to university, but now I feel kind of upset because it clashes with when I want to start a family. I find studying is boring, hard work and stressfull. When I finish I will be 23 and will have no savings, and will have HECS debt to repay :( I wish someone had of warned me of the tradeoffs of going to university before I started. But I am determined not to let study/career stand in the way of having a baby at an age where I want to have one. My boyfriend comes from the country and a low socio-economic background. Many of his friends already have kids. The less education women have the earlier they seem to have kids, and the more they seem to have. :shrug: My boyfriend only has a low wage job. He wouldn't earn as much as me after I have completed my degree. Yet I'm still the one that must take time off to give birth and nurse the baby. It's so impractical. But what can I do, I can't beat biology.


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## Strawberries

I voted 22-25 becuase that is the age I'll be when we are 'ready' ie. finished uni, started work etc; but I think there's no 'right tine' that everyone should follow. You know yourself when you want to start a family, and who knows, OH and I might start earlier and end up in the 19-22 bracket.


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## lozzy21

amy_2 said:


> Thanks for the replies. But I still worry about what my parents think, they have a very negative reaction to the thought of me having a baby. When I met my boyfriend my mum's only advice was "don't rush into having kids", and to "build a career first". My own mum didn't have me till 30 when she had already established her career, but she admitted she wished she'd still waited a few more years before having me :( Makes me think some people have regrets.
> My boyfriend is amazing though. He is fantastic with kids, and I know he wants kids and would be a great father. I couldn't possibly wish for a better partner than him.

I had all this with my parents, Im 22 and got told im too young to have kids, i need to see more places and do more ect ect ect

Yet when i told them i was pregnant they were all over the moon and realy happy.

Just remember its your life and only you can decide what to do.


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## sweetcheeks85

I had my little boy when I was 24, to me it was a perfect age. I was in a stable loving relationship, we had lived together for a couple of years and I had my career. Even though we were finacially stable when I fell pregnant my OH was made redundant at xmas so situations can change. I dont know if there is ever been a perfect time. If u want a career though I would consider maybe trying to acheive that first as *personally* I dont feel I could acheive my career now I have my little boy but then everyone is different. It depends what is important to u :hugs:


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## fuffyburra

I didn't go to university, I knew I was fickle and only interested in it for a while because it seemed novel. I made the right choice in not going, because while I only work in retail and still have NO idea at all what I want to do with my life, I met OH and he's willing to support us any way he can. Even if I have to work part time after kids I'll still be over the moon :) 
I'm also lucky in that I have an understanding mum - all she ever wanted to do was have children and settle down. She had my older brother and sisters and then started a career at a solicitors, then later on she had me and my twin. We were sort of like her grand finale :rofl: Anywho, she knows how much I want kids, and to be honest I think she's quite shocked I don't have them already XD 

I voted 22-25 because we'll have achieved everything that needs to be done by the time we're that age, we'll probably TTC at about 23, though I wish it was sooner  

I know it seems your mum would be disappointed, but as Lozzy said I bet she'll be pretty chuffed when she's got used to the idea! You're not your mum, you need to do what's best for you because if you spend the rest of your life trying to make other people happy you'll regret it. Good luck xx


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## aly888

I know what you mean about parents!! My mum has wanted me to have babies since I was about 16 So she was fine, but my dad and my OH's parents werent so thrilled. My dad didnt even react to me saying we were pregnant and my oh's mum literally bit her lip and said "oh your not are you" :dohh: but after about 1 week they were all so excited about having a grandchild, and now she is here they cant get enough of her!!
Its normal to be worried what your parents may think/say, and you may not get the reaction you want initially, but they will most likely be totally over the moon with the news once it sinks in!!
I agree with what someone else says though and maybe find a job and work for a bit so you get maternity pay (dont know what the rules are where you are). But its up to you. Some women live to have a family and have no desire to have a career. Everyone is different!! X


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## BButterflies

I voted 25-28. I am nearly 20 now, and super broody. I finish my degree when I am 21 and my OH will be 22, and I think we would have to wait until we are at least 25 to have a suitable amount of savings for me to feel comfortable and to be settled in our careers. 

I think I will be personally ready when I am 23, but money is a huge barrier. I have student overdrafts to pay off, and although that can be done relatively quickly, my OH isn't the best with money so getting him to save as much as possible will be a challenge. 

As far as the nature of the relationship is concerned I will also be ready in about 3 years! We will have been together for almost 6 years, and have lived together for 4 and I already know he is the man I want to father my children! I want to be maried first too though so that takes up some time.

Women have a hard time, because they are criticised for having children early before a career, even though that leaves plenty of time for career later, if you have them when your 30 you may well be sacrificing become the top of your career ladder, and if you leave it late you get criticised as it is more risky...may not be able to have as many children as you want etc. 

As for my parents, I don't think they would be dissapointed if I was 25/6 if I have a stable career. I will have been with my OH for a long time but I think they would prefer if I was married. I think my OH's mom can't wait to be a Grandma!


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## Kassy

I've always believed that a certain level of maturity is needed before somebody should have a baby and for most of the world people don't hit this level of maturity until they're in their mid twenties, I do understand however that some people are alot more mature at an earlier age.

At twentyfour myself i only just feel ready and mature enough to bring a baby into the world.


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## aly888

Kassy said:


> I've always believed that a certain level of maturity is needed before somebody should have a baby and for most of the world people don't hit this level of maturity until they're in their mid twenties, I do understand however that some people are alot more mature at an earlier age.
> 
> At twentyfour myself i only just feel ready and mature enough to bring a baby into the world.

In a lot of ways I agree, but I also think that having a baby changes your life so much that you find that new level of maturity if you didnt already have it!! :flower: x


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## 4magpies

I put 22-25 because I am 22 nearly 23 and I feel ready right now. Ive done everything I wanna do & I dont want to be an old mum. So I feel this is the right age. But everyone is different.

xxx


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## amyclaire

Voted 22-25. Oh and I will be 22 when we start ttc so fingers crossed I'll be 23 when I have my first. My parents, or my mum at least is very traditional etc, had me when she was 33 and my brother when she was 30. She always is saying what career do you want, and I yes I'll have a degree in a month bla bla bla and I have ideas about what I want to do but it doesn't make me happy like the thought of being a mum and having a family does. I am a total "I'll cross that bridge when I get to it" kind of person and I know that my oh and I will have a baby when we want one. My mum knows that we'll do what makes us happy and I guess that even if she disapproves a bit she'll be having a grandchild. Plus, I think parents see their children as their 'babies' no matter what their age, I could be 30 and having a baby and my mum would be 'ahhh my baby's having a baby' etc...
Just do what makes you two happy, there's always reasons not to do things and whatever peoples salaries are etc things always work out xxxx


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## Hollys_Twinny

I'm not going to vote, I don't really think anyone can say what the BEST age is exactly I was 20 when I had Morgan, it was young- but not too young. I think it's more about your personal circumstances & how mature you are as a person.


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## Racheldigger

I don't think I can vote, because you can't say 'oh, such and such is the right time' for somebody else, you can only know, or make your best educated guess at, whether or not now is the right time for you in your very particular set of circumstances. I was 41 when LO was born, and we're now wondering about having another - we waited till the very last stroke of my biological clock, but the conditions we were both employed in wouldn't have been right until I was about 39!


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## Mrs Doddy

I don't think that the first age group should even be on there as a good time to have a child - they are still children themselves. As for an age that is best - well everyone is different. I will be 28 by the time the baby is born and I am happy with this.


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## Gille01

I voted 25-28 simply because I'll be 25 when my child is born next year (hopefully!).
There really isn't a right time or right age. Its about the person. For me, I feel ready as I am so I'm going for it at 24. For my older sister, for example, she wouldn't be ready and she's 26. It's more about if you're ready, if you're really thinking about it as a responsibility and not just about having something new and if you can handle it properly. There's no certain age for that readiness, it just depends on you. 

Good luck!


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## xsophiexleax

Pretty much what everyone else said!
It all depends if you're ready in yourself, your financial state, how strong your relationship is etc. Age is just a number :)
I'm 18 and feel I am emotionally ready, but my financial state isn't that great so now wouldn't be a good time.
If you feel the time is right, go for it :D just because your mum sorted her career first doesn't mean that's the right decision for you too. Good luck :) x


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## Caroline:-)

I don't think there is a 'right' age... it depends on personal circumestances and how you both feel about it... I'm 30 now and planning on TTC #1 in a few months... it's hard to say why the time hasn't been right for us until now -we've been together for 10 years and married for 5 and I've wanted kids for years... but the time just hasn't been right... financially, job-wise, and wanted to buy a house rather than rent... but the last couple of years it's been on hold because I don't get full maternity pay until I've been in my job 2 years... I'm just little miss sensible to be honest!!! haha... I would have loved to have had kids years ago but my sensible-ness made me hold off!!! lol. There's lots of reasons for waiting... or indeed not waiting... I think as long as you're reasonably sensible about it, i.e. have a home, income to cover necessities (including to get you through the maternity period!) and are fully committed I don't see a problem whatever your age! (Within reason - I don't think planning to have a baby under the age of say 21/22 is the BEST idea - you have to live a little life first and become emotionally secure enough) But I do think people should bear in mind the things that will be harder (either financially or practically) to achieve once they have a child... i.e. study, holidays, wedding, going out, etc... but it just depends on what's important to each individual  
Good luck with whatever you decide!!! And remember - it has to be yours and your partners decision - what was right for your mum, may not be right for you. And I'm sure she will be there to support you with whatever you decide in the end


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## Loopy Loo

I am 23 in August, I have a little boy who is 3.5 so had him just after I turned 19... at the time I was very much ready it took me a year to get pregnant, I grew up very quick clubbing and living life to the full as soon as I could!

After a couple of life events, my parents moving abroad on a posting, no family support at all locally, childcare costs, my neice and dad dying I won't lie its been very difficult and I have had to learn the one thing that you need the most with parenting.... patience and lots of it. 

But after all of the above and being a little bit skint as I work full time and have to pay the childcare costs I would say it was the best thing I did he makes me smile everytime I look at him and I know that when I am 37 he will be 18 and I will be able to hopefully see him grow up to be strong and successful and hopefully a little family of his own. My dad passed away suddenly at the age of 44 so it has made me very grateful of my parents having me young in their mid 20's.

Main thing is as long as you can provide your child with lots of love and you know deep down its what you want and you can provide them with a loving home with food and clothes then go ahead and do it. 

Sorry bit of an essay!!! 

Vicky xx


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## mummy3

Im on the fence a bit here too:wacko:
I was 21 when I had my first and although I felt ready then I was more ready for my second at 24. I would say its a very personal decision, reflecting individual maturity. I very much had a plan but my first was a surprise, however I still carried on with getting my degree and bettering us which I feel is mature yet in a lot of ways I felt very lost.

Dh and I want a big family and we want to be younger, his parents were 46 and 50 when he was born and he feels strongly that we wouldnt be doing that! We had our children whilst studying and thankfully that led to a good income and the means to provide.

I would say go with your heart but have the maturity to see through the decision so you can provide, whether thats getting an education/career beforehand or planning for one after:thumbup:


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## mandaa1220

As everyone else has really stated, I don't think there is a "right time" to have children... Life gets in the way, no matter which route you take - so you need to do what's personally right for you and your OH.

I did vote, however, based on my own experience and what is going to be right for me. I will be 24, 25, 26 when I start TTC - somewhere around then, no definate date yet. I'm 20 now and broody as hell, but I'm trying to think about what will be best for my child. My mom had me as a teen and I've just recently started to learn about what a serious struggle it was for her to raise me - there were times when she couldn't afford to eat, we were evicted from our homes, she couldn't finish school - and just now, her baby (me) :rofl: is 20 and we finally are living in a nice home with her boyfriend and she's no longer in debt. It's taken a REALLY long time for us to get here and I don't want to have that difficulty with my children.

In the next 4/5/6 years I will have completed my bachelors degree and hopefully my masters, have a teaching job, and be secure enough to get maternity pay. :thumbup: Plus have a home!


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## CowtownGirl

I think like everyone else, I don't think there's really a right time that's the same for everyone. I will be 30 when we start ttc for #1 and probably 31 when our LO would be born. But I didn't want children at all until I was 28, me and DH had been married almost a year and the broody feeling hit me very suddenly like a ton of bricks. I had already started my PhD when we decided we did want children so are now just waiting for me to finish my studies (and waiting to move back to my family). 

But my mom started when she was 24 and my grandmother had her first at 17 and my friends have started at different ages and they're all/have been terrific moms. I really respect women who know early on that they want a family. Personally I'm glad I'll be starting later on because I know DH is going to make a fantastic dad and I didn't even meet him till I was 24 and it's only now that I feel remotely ready!!! :flower:


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## Broody85

Hi girls, can i join in :)

Im 25 and graduated last year...although I am still looking for a "proper job". My OH has 1 year left of uni until he does a years placement. Then he has another 3 years at uni but he will be in a placement as well so will be getting payed. I have been broody since i came out the womb haha. I seriously dont think i can wait any longer...BUT i no its best for me, my OH and my child/ren to wait until we are more settled. Believe me if i won the lottery we would start trying right away.. Anyway I have voted 25-28 because thats when I feel me and my OH will be ready but like everyone says its a totally individual thing. 

What do u guys think about marrage before babies? My mam is so traditional in that sense and i no she would be dissapointed if we had children before marrage but me and my OH really dont see the big deal. In an ideal world I would get married before children but it takes so much time and money and personally i would rather spend it on having/bringing up children. We have years to get married. Also i think it would be nice for our children to see us getting married.

p.s. i love children so much i did me degree in childhood studies haha


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## mixedmama

I read somewhere that biologically the best time for a woman to conceive is 20-25 years because you're least likely during this time to have complications such as gynecological problems, high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. Also, pregnancy is probably physically easier at this time as well.

That being said, having a baby later has it's advantages too (financially-wise, well established career, etc.)

Theres no PERFECT time to have a baby, because a baby would always disrupt/alter/put on hold what ever is going on in your life at the time, but it is definitely worth it :) x


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## amy_2

Thanks everyone for the replies and advice. I agree it's a very personal thing when is right to have a baby. But childbearing seems to be left till later and later in western society. 

The average age in Australia for women to have her first baby is now 29 years old. Some people may be happy to leave it to that age but I don't think I am. I have also noticed that the more educated a woman is the more she is likely to delay childbearing and the less kids she is likely to have. But this is not due to choice, but due to circumstantial pressure. 

We are now in a rapidly ageing society which is in decline, and faces extinction. And can only be saved by mass migration from overseas (or a higher birth rate). Now that I have met a guy I really care about and is devoted to me, having a family one day soon seems like a great idea.


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## Damita

I choose 25 to 28 just because this is the right time for me :) Everyone is different


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## Webbykinskt

You've got to remember, it's YOUR life not your parents'. Unless they have good reason to tell you to wait then stuff them! If you have all the usual suggestions for raising a family (home, job, relationship stability) then I don't see why you have to wait for their permission. Maybe your mum wishes she'd waited, but if she'd have done that her fertility would have been leaking out the window. 

Do what's best for you. Not your parents.

Good Luck x

P.S - Parents laying down rules without good reason p*ss me off lol.


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## nm123

When I was at school, there was a girl in my class who's dad was 70 when he had her! She had half brothers and sisters older than her mum!


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## tasha41

I voted 22-25, 

Mainly because I had Elyse at 19 and ideally I would have been a bit older and settled into a better job first, maybe married, better off financially, etc.

But I think it's better to have kids young generally.


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## bky

We WTT until I was 29 (though I just turned 31) and this was good for us, though oh boy did we want to start a good 5-7 years ago. I established my career to the point that I was able to find an excellent part time job that allows me to keep up my work experience and care for babies. If we hadn't had other things going on 3-5 years ago would have been ideal for us as well. But we did, so now is better for us.
Everyone's situations are different though and there is no one right time. If you are going to be the primary earner I would say you might want to get 2 years of post graduation job experience under your belt so you will have an easier time of it when you do go back to work, but it's up to you!


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## kazpeza

i was 26 when i got pregnant with my first,i work but to me i work for luxorys for pocket money i wanted to be a mom not have a career,my husband can do that,i think putting off having children for a career may be dangerous ground because you dont fall pregnant so easily in your 30s and what if there is a problem with getting pregnant just my opinion.i had my 2nd at 30 and am now 36 trying for 3rd


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## Tashry

I just turned 26 and am about to have baby #2 - baby #1 came when I was 22. I love that I was young when I started my family. We both had finished college and had careers to develop. The way I see it we get to enjoy our babies/kids while we are young, they get to grow up knowing their elder relatives (Grandparents are in their 40's/50's and Great Grandparents are in their 60's/70's). And also when my kids are 20 we will be in our 40's, have our careers well established and will be able to enjoy the "empty nest" era of our lives relatively young. Also I will be young enough to live to see my grandkids and even my great grandkids should I live to "old age".
We are very happy with our decisions.


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## hope_fear

voted 22-25. im waiting till im 23, dont wanna be to old when i have my baby. 23 sounds like a nice age and gives me plenty of time to get ready.


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## beccad

I'm 30 now and won't be TTC until Feb next year, when I'll be 31 (December birthday). I've always wanted to have kids, but haven't felt anywhere near ready until fairly recently. The whole idea of it still terrifies me, but I'd really regret it if I didn't have kids. So 31/32 for my first (assuming no problems) will be right for us.

I couldn't imagine having them before now - I didn't get together with DH until I was 26, and before that I just had too much other stuff I wanted to do with my life before I had kids. I wasn't in a hurry to grow up at all!


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## CandyApple19

i had my first son at 17.x


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## x-amy-x

i dont think there is a right age to have kids... cept under 16s. 

and i couldnt honestly say when i thought the best time would be to have them because im having them now at 21, so who knows what its be like to have them in 5, 10 years :shrug:

I dont think it has to be career or kids. Im going to uni next year :) xx


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## BradysMum

I was 25 when I had my first. Honestly though I don't think its about age, its more about the person and when they feel ready


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## Aidan's Mummy

I had Aidan when I was 17. It hasnt ruined my life at all I still do want I want to do I am stil going to uni

But it would have been easier if he had been born in my mid twenties. But he wasn't and I am doing just fine
xx


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## coccyx

Was person who voted 12-16 having a laugh


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## Aidan's Mummy

Maybe they clicked the wrong one
xx


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## Beccaface

I don't believe in a 'good' age.
I believe in, if you feel ready, go for it.
xx


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## pink_bow

I defo dont think it goes on age ( not condoning young girls of 14 ect to go out and get preg) but more if you are ready both emotionally and financially.xx


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## caggimedicine

I haven't voted because I don't think you should choose to have a baby based on the age you are. It's down to your situation. If you're financially stable and able to take care of a baby then that's when you should have one.


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## Princess_LV

I'd have to agree with the above poster on this one.

I'm 23, and people tell me that I am too young, but I feel that I am ready. I would not have been ready a few years ago, but that is just me - I'm sure lots of other women were/are ready at a younger age. Likewise, I'm certain there are plenty of 23 year old women who don't feel they are ready.

If you want to please everyone, and never have anyone say that you are too young / too old, you'd never have children. A friend of mine told me I was too young, but thinks her 19 year old and 18 weeks pregnant sister is old enough... you just can't please some people! 

"Age ain't nothing but a number" at the end of the day my lovelies! x


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## wanting2010

I voted 22-25. I've always seen myself being a young mother, specifically before 25.


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## MikaylasMummy

i was 22 when i had my lo and although i thought it was slightly young i am very happy i did now and have our second(and last) on the way as i have now got plans to start my uni course(registered nursing) a year after bubby is born and will be finished by the time they are both in school and can get work straight away..i know that many mums including my own found it hard to start working..stop and have kids, then get back into it years later cos of the huge gap they had in their career..i wont have that cos i have had my kiddies and can start my career a litle later not having to worry about when it will be too late to have kids!


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## MikaylasMummy

oh and just to add a lovely lady at the drs surgery today said its great u had her young you need so much energy to look after little kids!!she said it in a nice way..lol..not saying my child was a terror or anything..even thought wed been waiting for 2 1/2 hours!!!


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## beccad

MikaylasMummy said:


> oh and just to add a lovely lady at the drs surgery today said its great u had her young you need so much energy to look after little kids!!she said it in a nice way..lol..not saying my child was a terror or anything..even thought wed been waiting for 2 1/2 hours!!!

Everyone always says that about being young, but turning 30 doesn't turn you into some tired old person :sleep: LOL! You still have energy to go out and do stuff :thumbup:


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## Caroline:-)

beccad said:


> MikaylasMummy said:
> 
> 
> oh and just to add a lovely lady at the drs surgery today said its great u had her young you need so much energy to look after little kids!!she said it in a nice way..lol..not saying my child was a terror or anything..even thought wed been waiting for 2 1/2 hours!!!
> 
> Everyone always says that about being young, but turning 30 doesn't turn you into some tired old person :sleep: LOL! You still have energy to go out and do stuff :thumbup:Click to expand...

Haha, well said!!! :thumbup:
Coming on here has made me feel ancient at 30, lol!!! Even though in the 'real world' I know loads of people my age who are no where near even thinking about babies yet!!!! :shrug:


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## lottie7

I suppose there is never a right age. I would say the right age is when you have enough love and can offer a safe environment and can financially provide for your little baby.
xx


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## sophie c

i voted 19-22! because i had my LO at 19 and i firmly beleive i was ready, its what i always wanted., to be a mum! and i love it and now have my 2nd LO on the way! :D

not saying its the best age for all mums as there can be some very immature 19 year olds but it was right for me, so therefore i dont think there is an ideal age. just a personal ideal age, i.e when your ready x


----------



## beccad

Caroline:-) said:


> beccad said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> MikaylasMummy said:
> 
> 
> oh and just to add a lovely lady at the drs surgery today said its great u had her young you need so much energy to look after little kids!!she said it in a nice way..lol..not saying my child was a terror or anything..even thought wed been waiting for 2 1/2 hours!!!
> 
> Everyone always says that about being young, but turning 30 doesn't turn you into some tired old person :sleep: LOL! You still have energy to go out and do stuff :thumbup:Click to expand...
> 
> Haha, well said!!! :thumbup:
> Coming on here has made me feel ancient at 30, lol!!! Even though in the 'real world' I know loads of people my age who are no where near even thinking about babies yet!!!! :shrug:Click to expand...

Yeah I'm feeling quite old reading the posts on here, but in reality, I'd be one of the first in my group of friends to have a baby :wacko:


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## mbara

I don't think there any such thing as the "right age" as when the right time in your life. I got pregnant at 18, which was way to young for me and hopefully we'll be conceiving this year when I'm 25, which is perfect for us. I finally finished school, got a great job, more money coming in, etc etc.


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## CowtownGirl

beccad said:


> Caroline:-) said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> beccad said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> MikaylasMummy said:
> 
> 
> oh and just to add a lovely lady at the drs surgery today said its great u had her young you need so much energy to look after little kids!!she said it in a nice way..lol..not saying my child was a terror or anything..even thought wed been waiting for 2 1/2 hours!!!
> 
> Everyone always says that about being young, but turning 30 doesn't turn you into some tired old person :sleep: LOL! You still have energy to go out and do stuff :thumbup:Click to expand...
> 
> Haha, well said!!! :thumbup:
> Coming on here has made me feel ancient at 30, lol!!! Even though in the 'real world' I know loads of people my age who are no where near even thinking about babies yet!!!! :shrug:Click to expand...
> 
> Yeah I'm feeling quite old reading the posts on here, but in reality, I'd be one of the first in my group of friends to have a baby :wacko:Click to expand...


LOL!!! I totally agree with you guys. I'm 30 next month and sometimes on here I feel sooooo old but I only have one friend in 'real life' who has a baby yet (and that was only last year). There's no way I was ready before now and didn't meet DH until my mid-20's anyway. Thanks for posting, though and making me feel more normal!! And likewise, I haven't shrivelled up and lost all my energy just because I'll be 30 this year - lol!!! :thumbup:


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## Lara+sam+bump

Well I had my 1st at 19. I was to young in my opinion, I wont be havin my 2nd and last till I hav completed a list of things. 
*lived with my OH for a min of 2 years (he's moving in wid me in 3 weeks time)
*Got my degree (will be done in 5 years, as I start next Sept)
*Have a house with a garden (atm I hav a flat)
*own a dog (bit of a silly one lol)
* Be married
* Hav worked for at least a year after graduating
* Have a good monthly income (2nd time round I dont want to worry as much)
Il be about 26-27 years old by the tme I have worked a year after graduation. My son will be 7-8 years old. I know this is a big age gap, but thats wat I want. I want to enjoy my 2nd as a baby as much as my first xxxx


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## plutosblue

I voted for 22-25 just because I sit in that range.

Honestly, I am planning to go NTNP after my wedding, now my parents and OH's parents know all about it and are actually very supportive, but telling other people I still get the strange look like I am a naughty teenager! But actually I am an adult, and I have no desire to have a high flying career, I want to be a mum, and well.. thats that :haha:

I think there is no perfect time or age, some people wish to wait, others don't and as long as you have stability and mentally feel prepared then that is the right age for you.


----------



## Pippin

I voted a bit later 28-33 as now I am more mentally ready and financially but still young enough to be active.


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## maybabydoll

I'm 29 and it's funny that 30 feels quite old on here!! Especially when record numbers of women in their 40s are having babies. Here's an interesting article from the Guardian about when's the best time to have a baby:

https://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/may/26/best-time-to-have-a-baby


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## Laura617

*I voted 22-25. It really depends on the person though, I am about to be 28 and find myself wishing I had started even a couple of years earlier but my goal was one baby before I was 30 so at least I'm on track for that.*


----------



## amy_2

Looks like 22-25 has won the poll, but 25-28 is a close second.

Thanks everyone for your input, it's an individual thing for everyone. But it is really good to hear other people's ideas/opinions. 

My guess is that I will end up being about 24 when I have a baby, I think that's a good age, and that would give me time to save for a deposit on a house, hopefully!


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## sarah1989

22-25 as this is when we decided we would be ready. Finished school, good amount of savings, not too young, not too old and plenty of time to have more!


----------



## JASMAK

I voted 28-33....but honestly, I truly belive it's when you are ready! I was 28 when I had my first, but I was ready waaaay before then, but hubby wasn't. I am now 35 having my third, and I feel a bit old, and it is harder than my first and second (had my second when I was 30). But, life works like that sometimes...and it took us four years to have this one.


----------



## smootch

Not too keen on this poll, it took us 7 years to fall pg with th ehelp of 15 cycles of IVF!

reading what age you think is best i know is an oponion of members only but is sad to read when you have tried for so long and is totally out of your control

i wanted to be a mum at 23 not 30!


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## Celesse

I think a lot depends on the social norms for your family and peer group. I have just had my first at 30, I am a similar age to when most of those I work with have had children, one of the first from my group of mates at school and am a similar age to when my mum had me. 

MIL thinks I'm an older mum as she had her kids at 18, and her older children where parents by the time they were 20. OH is the only one to wait.


----------



## RoyalPython

amy_2 said:


> Thanks for the replies. But I still worry about what my parents think, they have a very negative reaction to the thought of me having a baby. When I met my boyfriend my mum's only advice was "don't rush into having kids", and to "build a career first". My own mum didn't have me till 30 when she had already established her career, but she admitted she wished she'd still waited a few more years before having me :( Makes me think some people have regrets.
> My boyfriend is amazing though. He is fantastic with kids, and I know he wants kids and would be a great father. I couldn't possibly wish for a better partner than him.

My own mum had me at only 19. She left Uni for me and got married, she says she would never change when she had me, though she said it may have been better to wait maybe a year or more she would never go back. NOW she has a VERY stable career as a nurse, her WORK is paying for her uni, she is only 36 (turning 37) Im now grown and can take care of myself so she is care free. Thats why I voted 19-22. Because everyone has their right age, but I think thats a perfect example how she had me young, and now is better off then if she had me later...


----------



## Aidan's Mummy

RoyalPython said:


> amy_2 said:
> 
> 
> Thanks for the replies. But I still worry about what my parents think, they have a very negative reaction to the thought of me having a baby. When I met my boyfriend my mum's only advice was "don't rush into having kids", and to "build a career first". My own mum didn't have me till 30 when she had already established her career, but she admitted she wished she'd still waited a few more years before having me :( Makes me think some people have regrets.
> My boyfriend is amazing though. He is fantastic with kids, and I know he wants kids and would be a great father. I couldn't possibly wish for a better partner than him.
> 
> My own mum had me at only 19. She left Uni for me and got married, she says she would never change when she had me, though she said it may have been better to wait maybe a year or more she would never go back. NOW she has a VERY stable career as a nurse, her WORK is paying for her uni, she is only 36 (turning 37) Im now grown and can take care of myself so she is care free. Thats why I voted 19-22. Because everyone has their right age, but I think thats a perfect example how she had me young, and now is better off then if she had me later...Click to expand...

What a lovely story and what a shining example of how all us young mum's can do well as well :)
xx


----------



## RoyalPython

> My own mum had me at only 19. She left Uni for me and got married, she says she would never change when she had me, though she said it may have been better to wait maybe a year or more she would never go back. NOW she has a VERY stable career as a nurse, her WORK is paying for her uni, she is only 36 (turning 37) Im now grown and can take care of myself so she is care free. Thats why I voted 19-22. Because everyone has their right age, but I think thats a perfect example how she had me young, and now is better off then if she had me later...

What a lovely story and what a shining example of how all us young mum's can do well as well :)
xx[/QUOTE]

Thankyou :) It tends to run in the family as well, my gran is only 56 and her mum would only be turning 76. They all got married young and had their babies young and did a great job. None of them were in bad financial situations and somehow always managed. Aiming to be a young mum myself :happydance:


----------



## Wanting2bamum

I voted 25-28. I think that age range is reasonable because I feel like you've done the majority of your fundamental growing and most likely have a direction in your life, and stability. I am 23 and TTC, but in my family having babies early is the norm. I am the first one in my family to pass my teen years without being pregnant, graduate from university and get a degree, and now I have a permanent position with the government...so for me I have the stability that I needed in order to think about having kids. Generally I feel that happens once you hit 25 though. I'm in a loving relationship and we live on our own...these are all things that I think need to be thought about before trying to have a baby.


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## Aidan's Mummy

RoyalPython said:


> My own mum had me at only 19. She left Uni for me and got married, she says she would never change when she had me, though she said it may have been better to wait maybe a year or more she would never go back. NOW she has a VERY stable career as a nurse, her WORK is paying for her uni, she is only 36 (turning 37) Im now grown and can take care of myself so she is care free. Thats why I voted 19-22. Because everyone has their right age, but I think thats a perfect example how she had me young, and now is better off then if she had me later...
> 
> What a lovely story and what a shining example of how all us young mum's can do well as well :)
> xxClick to expand...

Thankyou :) It tends to run in the family as well, my gran is only 56 and her mum would only be turning 76. They all got married young and had their babies young and did a great job. None of them were in bad financial situations and somehow always managed. Aiming to be a young mum myself :happydance:[/QUOTE]

Good luck hun. You may get judged a bit as I did and everyone seems shocked when I say I had Aidan at 17 but I am at uni they say things like " I didn't expect that"

I am sure you will be fine especially with your mum being there for you
xx


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## RoyalPython

Aidan's Mummy said:


> RoyalPython said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> My own mum had me at only 19. She left Uni for me and got married, she says she would never change when she had me, though she said it may have been better to wait maybe a year or more she would never go back. NOW she has a VERY stable career as a nurse, her WORK is paying for her uni, she is only 36 (turning 37) Im now grown and can take care of myself so she is care free. Thats why I voted 19-22. Because everyone has their right age, but I think thats a perfect example how she had me young, and now is better off then if she had me later...
> 
> What a lovely story and what a shining example of how all us young mum's can do well as well :)
> xxClick to expand...
> 
> Thankyou :) It tends to run in the family as well, my gran is only 56 and her mum would only be turning 76. They all got married young and had their babies young and did a great job. None of them were in bad financial situations and somehow always managed. Aiming to be a young mum myself :happydance:Click to expand...

Good luck hun. You may get judged a bit as I did and everyone seems shocked when I say I had Aidan at 17 but I am at uni they say things like " I didn't expect that"

I am sure you will be fine especially with your mum being there for you
xx[/QUOTE]

If people Judge their wasting their time tbh. Teen mums are such good mums, just as good as older mums. It just depends on the person not their age!!!

How is Uni with a baby? xxx


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## Aidan's Mummy

I havn't started yet hun, I start in september, It is going to be hard especially the course I am doing as it's childrens nursing and I will do shifts aswell but 3 years of hard work will pay off :)
xx


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## alicea

hey "Aidans Mummy" im in my 1st year of Adult Nursing!! yea its hard and yea u will need to do night shifts, long shifts (13hrs) but wen on placement they are very flexible, more flexible then the ward will be when qualified as u are supernumery as a student!! i am planning on TTC in dec 2010 as by time baby hopefully arrives if all goes as planned, i will just have finished my 2nd year! it will all work out, but my view is that it will be easier to have a LO now then once qualified!!


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## RoyalPython

Aidans mum - Ooh, good luck :) hope it all goes well! what qualifications do you need to get onto that type of course? or is it just UCAS?

Alicea- BABY DUST :) !! good luck!


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## alicea

RoyalPython- i got in with just GCSE's and my A Levels i only had "E"'s so not great. Look into it if u are interested as i left college thinking i couldnt go to uni so worked for 1 1/2 yrs then found out! You dont pay tution fees and u have a bursary so hopefully wont leave with too much debt x


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## RoyalPython

alicea said:


> RoyalPython- i got in with just GCSE's and my A Levels i only had "E"'s so not great. Look into it if u are interested as i left college thinking i couldnt go to uni so worked for 1 1/2 yrs then found out! You dont pay tution fees and u have a bursary so hopefully wont leave with too much debt x

Ooo, think they would accept a D in maths?:blush: I was one point off a C and really cant be bothered to re-do it because Im doing an animal course atm. :cloud9:


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## alicea

> Ooo, think they would accept a D in maths? I was one point off a C and really cant be bothered to re-do it because Im doing an animal course atm.

not sure about GCSE maths as u have to do a small maths and english test at the interview, nothing too challenging just to check that u can add 1+1 and get 2 lol!!! they need maths cos u will need to do drugs calculations and administer drugs! defo look into it!! Im at University of Southampton and love my course so glad i chose it! any more questions let me know :) x


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## Aidan's Mummy

RoyalPython said:


> Aidans mum - Ooh, good luck :) hope it all goes well! what qualifications do you need to get onto that type of course? or is it just UCAS?
> 
> Alicea- BABY DUST :) !! good luck!

I got in with my GCSE'S which were all a* to C apart from maths which was a D, They didn't even blink twice. I said to my tutor at teh interview about how bad my maths was and she sadi "Hospitals have calculators you know" All I have to know is what sums to do etc :D.

Alicea good luck with your course- What does the first year consist of?
xx


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## alicea

Aidan's Mummy- you have a placement January-March then another placement in july-August. You cover life sciences(biology), mental health, learning disability, NMC, children young people & maternity, Intro to Nursing Practice(basically things like policies and patient consent etc), public health, Study Skills etc! it sounds like a lot but isnt bad if u manage ur time!! u get some good support from ur programme leader. At the moment my Bursary is approx £560 a month but obviously if u have kids u will be entitled to more benefits!! 

Sorry about the essay lol, hope it helps

Alicea x


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## Aidan's Mummy

Thank you. What are the assignments like? Sorry for all the questions
xx


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## alicea

assignments are ok the first thing i did was a presentation(powerpoint) 2000 words, then we had a essay on IPL(inter-professional learning) 2000 words, got another one on Public health due next month 1000 words! key is to make sure u plan ur time, revise as u go(which i havent done and am now struggling) start assignments as soon as u get them!!! lol so i think being ORGANISED is the main advice i can give 

xx


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## Aidan's Mummy

alicea said:


> assignments are ok the first thing i did was a presentation(powerpoint) 2000 words, then we had a essay on IPL(inter-professional learning) 2000 words, got another one on Public health due next month 1000 words! key is to make sure u plan ur time, revise as u go(which i havent done and am now struggling) start assignments as soon as u get them!!! lol so i think being ORGANISED is the main advice i can give
> 
> xx

My mum said that. My nan was a nurse and she said through nursing my nan was so organised shr brought it back home bless her :rofl:
xx


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## welshwarriors

i voted 25-28...well i was 24yrs and 11 months old when i had LO. For me personally it was important that I finished college, be married and settled in in our new home on hubby's camp. I know that lots of ppl would leave the "be married" part out and just go for it, bt that's their personal choice.


----------



## Eabha'sMum

Strawberries said:


> I voted 22-25 becuase that is the age I'll be when we are 'ready' ie. finished uni, started work etc; but I think there's no 'right tine' that everyone should follow. You know yourself when you want to start a family, and who knows, OH and I might start earlier and end up in the 19-22 bracket.

lol... pure random, but the signature - sex and the city 2 - love it :winkwink:

L x


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## hayley x

I had my first baby at 19 and second baby at 20 (my first baby died :cry:) and we have just as much love for our baby's as a 30+ year old. they don't go without anything they need. me and my oh are happily married and i'm excited for our family growing and we have plenty of time for this to happen. the only time i think it would have been good to wait is then Alex would have died later in life meaning i didn't have to wait as long to meet him again. 

have a baby when you are ready not your parents. as long as you can provide for your baby in every way then that's all that matters xxx


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## LankyDoodle

I think you broke down your survey into too many options, as personally I think the best age to START a family is late 20s, which would encompass 25-30ish. Everyone is different but I think the best time is when you have reached a level of emotional maturity, achieved some financial stability and have done some of the things you hope to achieve in life so as not to feel resentful of any baby you do have. The best age is whenever you have done that - for me it was late 20s, for others it might be earlier or later. Personally Ihad a lot of emotional turmoil in my late teens/early 20s, and I believe that needed to happen to help me mature and settle into the person I am now; I certainly would not have wanted to have brought a child into that.


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## RoyalPython

hayley x said:


> I had my first baby at 19 and second baby at 20 (my first baby died :cry:) and we have just as much love for our baby's as a 30+ year old. they don't go without anything they need. me and my oh are happily married and i'm excited for our family growing and we have plenty of time for this to happen. the only time i think it would have been good to wait is then Alex would have died later in life meaning i didn't have to wait as long to meet him again.
> 
> have a baby when you are ready not your parents. as long as you can provide for your baby in every way then that's all that matters xxx

Im really sorry to hear that but thankyou for sharing. Young mummies are just as good and have just as much devotion and time for their babies as you and so many more prove :cloud9: people shouldnt jude!! makes me sooo angry when someone judges young parents :dohh:


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## samface182

just having a wonder around.. :blush:
i honestly dont think there is a 'best' age. depends on maturity, money, where you live, if you are really ready to bring a life into the world. basically, it all depends on your circumstances IMO.

xx


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## Aidan's Mummy

hayley x said:


> I had my first baby at 19 and second baby at 20 (my first baby died :cry:) and we have just as much love for our baby's as a 30+ year old. they don't go without anything they need. me and my oh are happily married and i'm excited for our family growing and we have plenty of time for this to happen. the only time i think it would have been good to wait is then Alex would have died later in life meaning i didn't have to wait as long to meet him again.
> 
> have a baby when you are ready not your parents. as long as you can provide for your baby in every way then that's all that matters xxx

:hugs:
xx


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## 4magpies

The best time for me to have a baby is now.

Shame my OH doesnt agree. :haha:


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## trumpetbum

I had my first two at 18 and 21 and this suited me as I had no clue what I wanted career wise and I had met my dh at a young age. I'm now having no3 at 29 and again, it's a great time for me with my nurse training under my belt and my girls both older. I really think it is of more importance _where_ you are in your life than what age you are. i won't be a better parent to this child but I'll be a different parent. This will be our last, 
i don't want more in my 30s or 40s but for many of my friends this will be when they start their families and it will be an ideal time for them.


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## pinkmummy

I got pregnant at 18 and at the time no it wasn't ideal. OH was only on £14k a year and I was still at college, it was hard but I wouldn't have had it any other way.

If we had waited I think we would have had one around 20-22 xx


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## horse_mad

I had anthony last november and im 23 in august this year,although every1 panicked when i announced i was pg we are flyin.my OH absolutely adores him and neither of us would change him for the world...the first few weeks are hard for everybody but after that you wont have a bother.Im not working at the moment and have no idea what direction i want to go in career wise so it suited me down to the ground and now i cant wait for #2!!!financially the initial getting a cot buggy etc etc is expensive and i find mayb an extra 20-40 euro on the weekly shop...some weeks i go mad buying things but usually its only 20euro,since he was 4mths he eats what we eat so its just formula wipes and nappies!!!I take all the hand-me-downs off his lil cousin,they grow out of clothes too quick to justify buying them all the time!!!

being a mum is great,i wouldnt change it for the world!!!


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## cleckner04

I had Emma at 22 and I think it's a perfect age 'for me'. Most 22 year olds I know are still out partying and living the single life. I have never been that girl. I married young and have been married nearly 6 years. 5 years when we had Emma. We were just ready. We had our time just to ourselves as a couple. We've explored and went on vacations to see different places. We own our own house, etc, etc. We were ready. :thumbup: And its the best thing I've ever done! :cloud9:


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## CookieDough23

For me, it will be around 25-30. 

That gives me time to do my degree, to find a place to live, to get a full time job and with a reasonable amount of savings too :)

Personally, I think mid-20s is appropriate.

I don't particularly agree with young pregnancy. And before people start flaming me, i'm not at all saying that everyone who has a baby young is a terrible Mum. I know some people make a fantastic Mum, even as young as 16. So yeah, before I offend anyone, everyone is entitled to their opinion! :)


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## Aidan's Mummy

No one agrees with young pregnancy. But I think it's what you make of it. I became pregnant at 16 about to start my degreestill gettong want I want from life but I also have a beautiful son :D
xx


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## CookieDough23

Aidan's Mummy said:


> No one agrees with young pregnancy. But I think it's what you make of it. I became pregnant at 16 about to start my degreestill gettong want I want from life but I also have a beautiful son :D
> xx

And I take my hat off to you! :) 

I personally wouldn't be able to cope with it.....and i'm almost 19. But very well done for making the most of it m'dear! :thumbup:


----------



## Pilot

Totally depends on the person! I want my first before I'm 22 :flower:
I'm so over partying and messing about with different people like my friends are. I feel like I've been ready for like 4 years :blush:


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## cleckner04

^^ that's how I was too. I've only ever been with DH so never had any of that sleeping around bit but I've seen friends go through guy after guy and I am SO thankful and feel fortunate for what I have. I would never want that life for myself. I've been with my hubby since I was 15. I'm now nearing 24 and he's still just as amazing as he was from the start but now we have a little monster to keep us on our toes. :cloud9:

I really think couples should be together 'just them' for a good few years before going the baby route. I've seen too many people jump in, have a baby, and end up splitting soon after because kids are hard on a relationship and if it's not strong to begin with, things can go bad fast! Just my opinion of course. :thumbup:


----------



## Pilot

Yea I have only ever been with OH as well and I don't really care about the fact that "I wont even be with someone else again" like my friends say :growlmad: 

I do think you should handle some rough patches together before going down the baby route. Just so that you can give the baby the best and not split up at the first conflict that appears!


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## RoyalPython

My OH is definately my only love, Iv partied a bit etcetc but find that all SO boring, and even if I do go out to parties or w.e its so much better with the love of my life. 

and it is so true-no one agrees with young pregnancy...and tbh I dont see why...when you fell ready, your ready..comes at different ages to different people. Mine came at 17ish after being with OH for a while(even though before i SWORE on my life i would never ever want children...guess metting OH made the difference ! ) ...others comes at 55.


----------



## amy_2

So 22-28 wins this poll. Equal numbers voted for 22-25 as did 25-28 age group. Interestingly this is when all the pressure is on women to finish studying and start up their career. 

There is a huge clash between having babies and having a career, at least that's how it feels to me, how can we be expected to do both?


----------



## mrsessex

I did both 

Started having children at 23 and stopped at 25 runnng my own
business

About to start again ttc'ing 

Let the fun begin!


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## Aidan's Mummy

amy_2 said:


> So 22-28 wins this poll. Equal numbers voted for 22-25 as did 25-28 age group. Interestingly this is when all the pressure is on women to finish studying and start up their career.
> 
> There is a huge clash between having babies and having a career, at least that's how it feels to me, how can we be expected to do both?

You learn to juggle hun. I have a toddler and juggling a nursing degree. It's hard. Time managment :)
xx


----------



## MummytoSummer

I didn't vote as I really don't think there is a 'best' age as everyone is so different and has different priorities in life.

But I have been with my husband 8 years and we lived together for 6 years. I wanted to be married before I had any babies and I also wanted to be sure we owned our own home which although we did when I was 21, we didn't get married until I was 25. 
I've never been interested in having a career and even now wouldn't have a clue what to do! I have an admin job in a prison, the pay is ok but it's not going anywhere iykwim, but I'm fine with that, that's how I like it. My ambition was to have a family. 
We also wanted to be certain that my husband could support us financially when I was off work and that we could afford for me to go back part time, he's been a financial advisor now for a few years and so earns a very good wage.

So I was 27 nearly 28 when I had my first little girl and my husband was 31, we plan on trying for our second around Christmas time.

What's important to one person may be bottom of the list for someone else though so I think it's just whenever you personally are ready!

X


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## tonibzac

I am 23 and hubby is 24.
I graduated from Uni 2 years ago and began work as a primary teacher which is very stable and good pay.
Hubby didn't do uni but got a good job with the Health Protection Agency who saw potential in him and are paying for him to do a part time degree, he goes to uni once a week, all expenses paid, jammy so and so! As it is part time, it is a 4 yr degree and he is currently in his 3rd year.

We met when I was 17, moved in together at his dad's after 6 months. We got married last August when I had just turned 22 and we bought our 3 bed house in April. Everyone thinks this is all really young, but for us, we've been together nearly 6 years now and I can't imagine life any different. We have done everything ourselves - saved £9,000 for our wedding and blessing and saved enough for a deposit on our house.

Now we are saving so that we have enough money so that I don't have to rush back to work and can take upto a year off with baby and be able to buy all the nice things for him/her. We are being sensible, it hurts me like hell but I know hubby is right being strong and making me wait.

When we start TTC I will be 24 (25 when baby arrives if we fall early) and hubby will be 26. I will have 3 years teaching behind me which is enough to feel confident in my job but still leaves me years on the career ladder to build upon. I love my job and want to be successful and don't see any reason why having a baby will stop that.
I also have 2 horses that I own and compete, they will get a year off when I am pregnant but I plan to return to riding and competing as soon as I can. I know hubby will support me in this as my horses are a big part of my life :)

So for me, after my rambling! I guess 25 -28 is my vote as if you are lucky to have found the right partner, it gives you time to settle down and enjoy each other first before being secure enough to bring baby to the world.

I work with lots of women in teaching, out of 10 female staff, 2 are married in their early twenties and the other 8 are late twenties-thirties and still single so to them, I am very young to be married and thinking of babies but in other social parties, I am a good age to have a baby. Strange how social pressure varies.


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## toffee87

Looks like most think between 22-28 then! That sounds about right to me


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## June2012

Hi 

It depends on the individual, amount of support and level of maturity. Some have kids when they are 19 and are successful parents.

My OH and I are in our mid twenties.I finished uni 2 years ago and have been working since i left uni. My OH and i have got good job and a house.

Yet our parents have told us that we should wait for a couple of years. Every time I hear that comment ,I feel very upset. 

When I ttc next year , I will be 26. If I fall pregnant end of next year , I will be 27 by the time the baby is born.:happydance:


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## rainbows_x

I became pregnant at 19, now I am 20 & Ava us two months old.
I think it is a nice age to have her, if we want anymore we have a while to decide if we like, OH is 28.
I would love to have another in four years, making me 24 & him 32, so still young.


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## toffee87

My parents say the same thing, mum had the eldest at 23, and me at 27. She says she wished she had waited a couple more years, but I'll be ttc when she was on her second!


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## tonibzac

I think it is always hards for Mums to see their own babies wanting babies, my mum is the same.
She married at 19, had me at 21, my brother at 23 and my other brother at 24. My dad was away in the army and she was in Germany with no family. Gosh knows how she did it!! She keeps saying to me I am too young, wait another 5 years. At my age (23) she had 3 kids! She says she doesn't regret it but I should do all the things I want to.

Me and hubby have been on lots of holidays, got married, got a house, I feel ready. Had a long chat with her the other night and she was really supportive :)


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## LunaRose

I was 21 when I fell pregnant, I felt I was young at the time. I also did worry what people would think even though I had already been in a relationship for 5 years, we both had steady jobs & we owned a home together! I was definitely more worried what other people would think about my age!

As long as you have the means & love to support a child, I think it makes no difference what age you are!


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