# How hard is it really



## bellasMommy18

To be a teenage parent?


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## sarah0108

It depends how well you cope with people judging you, if you have support, money, etc. 

It's just like being a normal parent :shrug: obviously its a struggle if you are in college and school etc aswell but overall the parenting side is no different to that of an older woman.


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## xforuiholdonx

Money wise some times its a struggle. To keep your head calm around certain people who say stupid things, is sometimes a struggle. Other then that, honestly, we have the same issues an older parents has truly. I feel that by being younger, my child will relate to me more, as when im 36 she will graduating highschool iykwim?


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## Bexxx

Not very.

I mean, being a mum full stop can be difficult at times. But the fact Isla doesn't sleep isn't because I'm a teen :lol:


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## xforuiholdonx

Sara Max is only four days older then Emma!


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## sarah0108

Ahhh yay :happydance: They can get Married :winkwink: Bnb baby wedding!


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## Leah_xx

At times its hard being a Teen parent but at other times its not. Money & school wise its tough. Watching them being sick and getting shots and what not is really hard. Gracelynn is sick right now and I got to get her in the doctors because I dont know whats wrong her with and its tough not knowing. But for the most part its not that tough. I think me being younger and having Gracelynn is a lot easier then what it would be though


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## xforuiholdonx

Wooohoo! Arranged Marriage ;). Lol.


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## sarah0108

:rofl: Lets sign the papers


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## mayb_baby

Piece of piss


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## sarah0108

Lies Lorna :rofl: xx


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## mayb_baby

Sarah :winkwink:
Easy as peas . . . Parenting is a handy wee job :D


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## leoniebabey

depends on you situation in all fairness. I know people who are teen parents and get everything handed to them on a plate. Some people dont have the support and struggle on.


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## mayb_baby

I know I have an OH but up until recently he never gave a penny, I had no help but I think if you budget properly then you have no worries. I think finances are the biggest issue for me but when you find the balance you'r sorted :)


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## sarah0108

TBH i find it easy, its only now that its getting hard because they are both toddlers and what not. Before it wasn't hard at all. I was surprised tbh!


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## leoniebabey

Money issues are a biggie for me. I ususally sail along okay not rolling in it but enough untill it gets to birthdays or xmas or something breaks then you can be a bit stuck. 
Deffo going to try and save a bit a month for next xmas! 

Secondly is the fact that a good portion of my family are idiots so we barely see anyone and when we do they just whinge and put us down about this that and the other 

Third is trying to juggle college and housework with a really difficult child.


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## mayb_baby

leoniebabey said:


> Money issues are a biggie for me. I ususally sail along okay not rolling in it but enough untill it gets to birthdays or xmas or something breaks then you can be a bit stuck.
> Deffo going to try and save a bit a month for next xmas!
> 
> Secondly is the fact that a good portion of my family are idiots so we barely see anyone and when we do they just whinge and put us down about this that and the other
> 
> Third is trying to juggle college and housework with a really difficult child.

Do you have a credit union near you? Direct debit savings 
£5per week by Christmas £255 or £10per week £510

Thats what I do :)


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## leoniebabey

hmm i've not see one i'll have to have a snoop about! x


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## TaraxSophia

To be honest it pretty close to being a 'normal' parent, its easier if you have the support to carry on with your education if you need it, and support from family and friends etc, oh and support from OH if there is one in the picture :flower: But the acutal parenting is pretty easy ;)


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## QuintinsMommy

honestly its hard to be a parent at any age. you have to give up so much. I never go out. I go to college pick up quin at daycare and go home... I got to college and hear about all the fun parties. I feel like Im missing out on my "college" years.

Money wise, its not any easier Im so in debt :(


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## JadeBaby75

Being a parent in general is hard work! Some people find it easier than other. I find being a student and a mom to be the most difficult thing ever but I am some how making it!


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## rainbows_x

Just as hard as being an older parent I would guess :shrug:

It totally depends on your situation! I have depression so I have my down days, some people might have financial problems, relationship problems etc.


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## lucy_x

For me?

Nothings changed and i find it fairly easy. I always had housework, always did the laundry, always had to work (im a WAHM)...So adding a few vests into the equation has made no difference (Ok im being a bit vague there) i never went out, i didnt have friends anyway.....

Im very fortunate that Amari has been a very easy baby, Shes slept through since 5 weeks old, shes very laid back. Me and OH have a very good relationship, and that hasnt changed and we both run our own businesses.....

the answer changes constatly on personal circumstances, and i think thats why the stigma attatched to young parents should be dropped by society, just because one is young doesnt mean one will automatically find it hard :flower:


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## 17thy

Not very hard lol. Besides the lack of money and college education (but I'm IN college lol) I would assume it's exactly the same as someone who isn't a teen. Even then there are plenty of older parents without money or a college education. I'm married, we rent a home, I'm a stay at home mom and my DH works, seems pretty normal to me, besides the fact that we were 17 and 18 when we had her.


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## Melibu90

Tbh having a baby was easier than what i was prepared for but that was just me however a few months ago OH lost his job and we struggled but hes just started a new one now
Having a toddler is what im dreading not prepared for that in the slighest :haha:


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## AirForceWife7

Pretty much the same as it would be for an older parent I guess?

I have more financial problems then a 30 year old mother (per say) would have, but not every teen parent has that problem.

Other than that, I see no difference really. It's honestly a lot easier than I would've expected, but I'm lucky because Brenna is such a good baby.


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## brandonsgirl

Its just as tough as being any aged parent. Every child has their struggles and advantages, sleepless nights/getting sick etc. Being a teen mum you just get judged more i think. But if you dont take notice that its not that big of a deal iykwim.


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## amygwen

It's hard but I'm not really a teen. I'm 21, but I go to school and have to work both full-time, it sucks. I rarely get to see my LO as much as I'd like to. I wish I was rich and could be a SAHM sometimes! Either way, you deal with it because you have to, you just have to make the best out of what you have!


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## xx~Lor~xx

It's pretty similar to just being a 'normal' parent. You're dealing with the same things when it involves the child. I think the only added pressures are financial worries (but in this climate, alot of families 'normal' age or young, are struggling) and if you are in education then it's another stress. 

For ME, the stressful bits of being a young parent at the moment is financial strain as OH has just been laid off one of his jobs, and there is no work for either of us, despite spending ages searching and signing up for agency work. A personal one for me as well is OH turning back into a teenager and thinking it's his 'god damn right' to go out whenever he wants and get back when he wants, and not help out. It's like a mid life crisis I tell you!! :dohh: 

Other than that, the judgemental looks, but you just got to ignore those and stick your head up and be proud of the family you have.


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## princess_vix

To me it's the same as being any aged parent.

Some days are harder than others and other days are easy.

To be honest I find it 95% easy.

:flower:


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## QuintinsMommy

I must be doing it wrong because I find parenting hard :dohh::haha:


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## rileybaby

I dont think its been as bad as everyone made out to me.. I know riley is only 16 months and i have a lot more to come lol


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## Strawberrymum

Parenting is hard! your constantly worrying and usually feeling quilty about something. 

Its harder if your single (I assume I've never not been) because you have less support and finances, plus MORE quilt because your LO doesnt have another parent (if their not involved). 

If your younger you usually haven't finished your education witch means you need to decide if you want to, then juggle it if you do. 

Plus having no education and a child means a lower paying job, if you can pay for child care. (MORE quilt of leaving your child to work and get your education witch you usually have to do being a teen mum and may not have to do if you were say 30). 

low paying job may mean you need support from others (parents, government) witch adds stress, prejudice and yup more quilt.

oh and its lonely. 

but all this is no comparison for the love you have for your child. :)


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## Tanara

_Being a "Teen" parent for me is no different than had we been older.

I have two kids and yes I had struggles when it was just me and my son but those struggles are something i seen my parents face in their 30's (financially, and mentally.)

Now that we have two, well i dont even feel like a teen, (I guess I'm not really going to be on monday)  I feel just like any mom.. 

_


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## mayb_baby

Strawberrymum said:


> Parenting is hard! your constantly worrying and usually feeling quilty about something.
> 
> Its harder if your single (I assume I've never not been) because you have less support and finances, plus MORE quilt because your LO doesnt have another parent (if their not involved).
> 
> If your younger you usually haven't finished your education witch means you need to decide if you want to, then juggle it if you do.
> 
> Plus having no education and a child means a lower paying job, if you can pay for child care. (MORE quilt of leaving your child to work and get your education witch you usually have to do being a teen mum and may not have to do if you were say 30).
> 
> low paying job may mean you need support from others (parents, government) witch adds stress, prejudice and yup more quilt.
> 
> oh and its lonely.
> 
> but all this is no comparison for the love you have for your child. :)

Some older mums go into education and are single and have the guilt of leaving there child even at say 30:dohh:

A lot of older mums are under educated and have low paying jobs or no jobs and need to claim benefits as does some older parents with disabilities, they too have stress, prejudice and guilt.

Single mums too may feel lonely.

To be honest I think if you willingly had sex and ended up pregnant well, you'r old enough to step up to the plate of parenting. I mean all parents have stress, guilt and worry. Even billionairs as money nor age can buy health, happiness and love and they are the things that shouldn't be taken for graunteed. Money helps, a good partner does too but this is reality. You get by as best you can and enjoy you'r LO as they grow up sooo quick.:lol:


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## rjb

it is hard. there i said it. i'm not going to sugar coat things, because the fact is, if you are someone who likes to go out and do things without planning in advance, it will hit you like a brick.
i love my child more than anything in the world, but not for a second could i say parenting is super simple.
a lot of nights i get basically no sleep, then have to get up at 5am, get her fed and dressed and happy then head to school to do work on 4 hours of sleep. frankly, there is no way i could do this without help. i'm not ashamed to admit it. being a parent is hard at any age.


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## we can't wait

I don't think that parenting is easy. The stage she's in right now is "easier," but not easy. It seems like parenting is easy, because it was so hard when she was a newborn. When you first become a parent it is a MAJOR learning curve. It gets easier after the first few weeks... but then it gets harder again when the LOs get older. I love my daughter with all my heart, so I don't see mothering her as 'hard' or 'work,' even if that's really what it is, iykwim? 

Honestly, I must be much different from the ladies that posted above on this thread, because I think parenting is the hardest thing you will ever do. Parenting is hard, stressful... but so rewarding. Seriously-- you've chosen to, for the rest of your life, put someone else's needs and wants above your own; chosen to take responsibility for raising them into productive members of society; you have a tiny little bit of the future in your hands.... Of course it's going to be hard! How could such an important job be easy?


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## bellasMommy18

im getting over the comments from people and the looks i get when i go out anywhere. im just worried about being a bad mom i guess or messing up...


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## rjb

I WROTE OUT A VERY LONG THOUGHT OUT PARAGRAPH IN RESPONSE TO THAT AND MY INTERNET CUT OUT :growlmad: 
anyway, in short everyone messes up at least once in their kid's life. what is important is how you do as a whole, and no one can judge you poorly if you have a happy, healthy, well rounded child.


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## Hotbump

I think TV exaggerate about how hard it is being a teen parent. I dont find it hard or different from being a older parent kwim? It does actually get harder once they start walking and talking, espeacilly when you have two toddlers (wait I think Jovanni counts as a preschooler). They are sooo easy when they are little and cant walk or talk, well to me they where, because you could just leave them in one spot and they stayed in that spot now a toddler well thats a whole different story :lol: BTW Sarah you need to send Harriet over to the US so she can marry Jovanni :winkwink: lol


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## Hotbump

And when I say soooo easy I dont mean like easy a piece of cake just easy compared to now that they are toddlers that write on the walls, fight with each other, empty the box of cereal on the carpet etc....


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## Shannyxox

Its different for everyone, Depends on their situation...


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## we can't wait

Hotbump said:


> And when I say soooo easy I dont mean like easy a piece of cake just easy compared to now that they are toddlers that write on the walls, fight with each other,* empty the box of cereal on the carpet etc....*

Aww, lol! Things to look forward to... 

I'm a bit nervous to know what the 'etc' could be! :rofl:


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## Hotbump

the etc. can range from finding out they put their hand down the toilet to calling poison control because they ate half of your lipstick and you dont know whether its toxic or not :lol: enjoy! lmao


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## we can't wait

:rofl:

Did the lipstick incident actually happen? Oh, lawd. 

The children in my family are... crafty... but not usually too horrible, lol.


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## brandonsgirl

When I was younger I also ate my mums lipstick. Apparently I also ate cigarette butts and hated the taste so tried my luck at some lipstick lol


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## emyandpotato

I find the fact that I can't be a SAHM the biggest issue. I hate that I have to work and do my degree and can't just enjoy my LO. Money is an issue but that could be said of any age. I also don't like how I'm made to feel I have disappointed people.


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## Hotbump

Yes the lipstick incident did ACTUALLY happen I even posted a thread about it I'll go find it :rofl:


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## Hotbump

Okay I just bumped it its called Help! lol


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## we can't wait

I just saw the thread! :rofl: 
It's scary at the time, but looking back... that is so cute. You should have taken a picture of his lipstick face to show his future wife. :lol:

My niece once took a package of bologna and used it to clog the toilet... and then proceeded to take the water (from the clogged toilet) and soak the dog. :dohh: Wrong? Yes. Evil? Yes... Funny? Kind of... but still wrong. :haha:


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## Hotbump

I should of taken a picture! I was just freaking out and instead of calling poison control right away I asked bnb lol typical :rofl:


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## MrsEngland

I think being a parent is hard full stop regardless of your age, there are pro's and con's for being a teen parent (we have more energy than older mums but might not have the patience etc) as there are for being an older parent i guess. 

Alot of it depends on the situation you are in i guess. I'm lucky i have tonnes of support, i'm married, have my own house and car and my husband works so that i can stay at home with my daughter. But its still hard work, rewarding but hard.


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## Mii

To be honest I think it all deppends on your mind set :shrug: Think about it if you dont want to get a job, or go to school etc your going to struggle, same if a women was 30 lol If her husband didnt make enough but she was to stuborn or w/e to get a job they would struggle and it would be difficult. 

:flower:


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## HellBunny

For me its no different to say being a parent 10 or 20 years older. I don't feel like a teen parent at all if that makes sense?


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## brandonsgirl

HellBunny said:


> For me its no different to say being a parent 10 or 20 years older. I don't feel like a teen parent at all if that makes sense?

Makes perfect sense :thumbup:


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## x__amour

Age will make no difference whether it's difficult or not. I've found it easier than I expected. I have a lot of support though.


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## tasha41

I don't think it's any harder than parenting at an older age... obviously, there are added obstacles if you are trying to go to school etc.. fortunately I was done high school by the time I got pregnant... but I did college part-time and graduated with honours.. I work FT at a job I don't love but I make decent money & have very flexible hours..


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## unconditional

im actually kind of shocked how many people said `normal`parent. any parent is a normal parent :shrug:...


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## annawrigley

unconditional said:


> im actually kind of shocked how many people said `normal`parent. any parent is a normal parent :shrug:...

Me too, just cos its teens saying it doesn't make it less offensive lol

I can't really answer how hard it is being a TEEN parent, because I've not known any different. I don't see how it'd be any harder than being an older parent. But then, it all depends on your circumstances. :shrug: Why so many questions Scooby Doo?


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## sarah0108

I don't think people meant 'normal' offensively :wacko:


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## unconditional

but if someone came in here saying "how is it different than being a normal parent" ; they would probably get butchered. :lol:


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## EllaAndLyla

Honestly, for me being a teen mum really isn't hard. I have learnt to deal with the judgements and the stares and I just suck it up now and ignore it. I find teething hard, but any parent would. I think if school was in the way too it would be harder. x


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## newmommy23

the hardest part for me is just money.


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