# Funny Things we do when TTC &TWW... Come join and share with us :)



## Bushmumma

I was thinking about how sexy (not) we are when we are Ovulating, please feel welcome to share your most funniest and strange things you do that would make your DH, OH, DF or DP shake their heads!!

Well for starters, we talk about cervical mucus over coffee like it's nothing lol what a great conversation piece for the dinner party with the new in laws!?? Hehehe 

So that's what I'm saying, share your :rofl: moments with us, we all need cheering up at some point through the TTC process :) xo 

Cheers 
Lynda xo


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## Soanxious

I feel like a fertility expert since TTC.. even my OH did not know that there was a specific small window where this could only be done... I did not tell him for the 1st few months but slowly (like most men) they eventually pick up on what we are doing..

Wake up in the morning.. before my eyes are even open.. I feel around under my pillow for my basal thermometer.. press the button and off I go.. a few mins later the 4 bleeps... the bedroom light goes on..and OH moans.. _awwwwwwwww_... as he rolls over.. then I jot it down on a bit of paper and toddle off to the loo..now you don't waste wee when your TTC..that is saved in a special beaker and is dipped with what calculates to be a very expensive habit called the OPK from our POAS habit cabinet... and whilst that is doing its wonders...this is where I inspect the CM.. now normally the average woman in a coffee shop would not discuss this..and neither would I before Oct last yr..for I knew nothing about it.. _yes me a mother of 3 knew nothing about cm_...but since ttc and getting my degree from google & B&B and other forums it's now just and everyday word like *sunshine* between myself and OH.. it is accidentally said at the wrong times _like in the middle of the aisle in asda when looking at panty liners_ as others will no doubt say on this page its happened many times.. so there I am inspecting my cm.. is it dry?sticky?(_you see diagrams online for this..mine does not look like that! am I human?_)creamy?wet?EW? well after the inspection which is 2nd nature like just wiping yourself after a wee that is jotted down too..along with opk results. 

I then I tip toe past teenage sons room back into my bed where OH is thinking... _oh was the temperature right? did she check her bits for a tell tale sign? did she pee on a stick again will she jump on me? or will she go back to sleep_.. he has told me about his thoughts so that's how I can mention them.. well today for instance..my temps are up my opk has 2 perfect lines and I have EWCM.. yee haa!! *im jumping on you today Honey*.. _Oh great.. I got to get up for work in 20 mins._. *oh it wont take that long* is my reply.. after all..this is the "perfect time".. so you have to tell the OH anything to get that :spermy: and those are the words he needs at that moment in time.. _a quickie_! 

So trying to feel as spontaneous as you can after taking your temp..weeing on a stick..checking cm..and creeping back into bed... even though you know that this is all timed perfectly..he knows that you have timed this perfectly too so you get to BD... :) ... he begins to enjoy this when all of a sudden.. the fertility degree that I got off google went up a level in his eyes as out comes some new lubricant in a tube...and im squirting a bit on his bits..*WOAH*!!! *what's that*?????? Oh relax.. its to make things nice and smooth... oooo.... is his reply... its to help the :spermy: its conceive plus.. I tell him.. loads of couples use it and say its awesome!! well so glad they invented that one!... 

After the deed is done.. I've got my own way..he's minus a few million :spermy: out comes the mooncup.. in goes some concieve plus and pillow under bum..mooncup in.. and there I go playing bubble pop on my mobile for 20 mins whilst he gets ready for work.... in that 20 mins since opening my eyes.. I have worked out the time is perfect, my cm is perfect.. my egg is about to pop.. and helped it along the way with some slippery stuff. This I know is not romantic.. but heck I do that romantic bit too... but who wants to know about my perfectly timed bedroom scene from "Top gun" where I am imagining tom cruise and my silky skinny body ..and the voiles blowing on the window and the music in the background?? we see that on tv all the time.. that's what it's like in real life.. isn't it? or is it the way I described above?

I never had to plan to get pregnant before.. it "just happened".. but as Im older now and time is running out I had to become more planned.. and timed.. I still enjoy the lovely side to BD.. but as us girlies know..if there is a chance we take it.. if the timing is perfect we try n take it.. and as our OH's will say.. best I do as I am told for I won't be having any oo la la when she is not fertile LOL...

The dignity goes when we goto docs for prodding and inspections and tests etc.. and timing is everything.. we have to giggle about it.. because if we don't we cry.. and that's something none of us girlies want for our online buddies... just wanted to share one of my ttc moments with you to let you know..your not alone... not everyone out there has the constant romantic perfectly timed conception... that some of us are a bit regimental.. but still manage to giggle about it and make it fun..

Good luck ladies ttc... :D 

ps No doubt I will just mention one or two funny LITTLE moments as the page grows... just wanted to add something... sorry if its a bit long LOL..


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## brighteyez73

Soanxious - I love it!!! :rofl:

I do the same routine as you Soanxious. When the timing is perfect I usually send him explicted pictures and tell him to come straight home or pop-up on a lunch break and do the do! I also lie there in my back with a pillow under my bottom for twenty minutes. The first time we TTC after we BD he asked me now what, what do you need me to do? I laughed and said I don't know.....pray. Now every morning at 6:15am he asks in his sleep what is the temp? I respond. 

I go to the bathroom and POAS OPKs and come back into the bedroom and he will ask one or two. I respond. If the answer is "one" than he will say ok I'm going to work unless you wanna.....:haha: If the answer is "yes" than he jumps up get the Preseed and goes to work. Than off to work he goes. Now if I test when I am home afterwork and he is still at work I send him pictures of Postive OPKs or almost Positive OPKs and I usually check my CM with second OPKs in the evening so I send pics of that too! And he usually send me a smiling face with the tongue out. LOL said that he knows those things mean it's time to get it on. So he rushes home for a quickie and leaves me propped up on the pillow and back to work he goes until 11pm or midnight. Than we go again for good measure. 

He laughs when I call his phone and say,"hey we need some more Preseed" than he says really they are going to think I am selling this on the streets I come in here so much with that blue and white box in my hand. And he just loves when I send him to the store for my TTC vitamins cocktail. He has the list posted in his phone. LOL After all of the necessary perfect timing arrangements are made and it's finally O day we BD and the day after and she says, "Ok no more running around for TTC items until next month right?" I say, "yes" than he responds with, "so we are in the TWW?" I lol and say, "wow you are learning the lingo too!" He says, "I have to in order to know what what the hell you be talking about." 

I know this is long but had to share our convos because they be silly. I wonder what he will think once I ask him to go get us a box of softcups this month? :haha:


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## cutieq

A good TTC for me would be inserting Preseed. When DH gets in the mood, I have to saunter off the the guest bedroom where I keep my tests and things, fill up a tube, insert it into my goodie hole and then attempt to come back in the bedroom feeling normal and sexy. Totally kills any once of spontaneity lol


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## ERosePW

I might be the only crazy person who does this, but when I'm getting close to O, I'm lining my OPK sticks up side by side in the bathroom cabinet to see the progression, and then even AFTER I O, I use a couple more and line those up too, just to see that it went negative again. DH has looked in my cabinet before to get a bar of soap or something, and there those sticks are lined up like I'm a crazy person. Sometimes I'm even using two different kinds of OPKs, so that's double the sticks. And the trash in our bathroom trashcan is probably the most colorful in the neighborhood! Between a couple different types of OPKs, and then when it comes time to start using HPTs, our trash is just full of purple, pink, blue, whatever! Every time DH goes to the bathroom, he is probably in there looking at the trash and just shaking his head. :winkwink:


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## Soanxious

Brighteyze that's so funny.. but this is what it's like in real life.. and yeah the men have to pick up on the lingo too hahaha! I love what you just wrote so funny!!

OMG Cutie.. are you a mess before the BD with all that preseed? :rofl: no wonder you attempt to feel sexy walking back in.. you must be slippery hun.. :rofl: see what us ttc women have to go through!!! I love it!!

Erose do you have some OCD hun? lol... I do what you do but with photo's I save that cycle into a folder on my laptop and name them by date and test1 test2 etc and the same with my HPTLOL... may even save one as my wallpaper on laptop one day. Bet the bin is the most colourful :haha:

I love these stories.. makes you think ..your not the only one thinking something odd is normal or someone normal is off lol... we all do it our own way and often very similar to others :D x


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## Bushmumma

That's fantastic!!!! 
I don't have much as I'm new to the ttc life, I didn't know anything about cm, bbt, charting, opks NOTHING! 
This is what I've learnt... 
Can't wait to wake up and check my cm, oh and I take my phone with me to the loo so I can put the data straight into my app.. It asks did I have sex today? Well not yet I'm waiting to give you data so you can tell me I'm ready to! Once data is saved I sneak back to bed and do all the sexy stuff for DH to get the idea :). It doesn't take long ;) and it's on!! Once the bd is over he says ' you planned that didn't you baby?' 
Ahhh.... Smiling at him and YES!! How did you know? 
Turns out he thinks he knows everything! Lol

What he is good at is symptom spotting, yep great!! The first time he had it right and I swear I was only about 1/3 the way through my cycle! Maybe I give it away when he gropes the boobs and I tell him they are sore lol or ask for a back rub..... Oh I know it's when I eat the kitchen outta good in one day.... I'm sure that's the give away sign :rofl: 

All ladies please feel free to express anything you want on here, it'll be a great place to laugh with a great bunch of ladies that are all in the same boat, that boat is called the Titanic!!!!!


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## Soanxious

[email protected] eating the kitchen so it's empty... yeah we spend the time putting down the data and letting it tell us when.. and this smep well what if the collides with the timing on an app? the decisions we have to make.. and sometimes its made in a forum LOL :rofl:

I wonder how many babies have been made just from 1 persons helpful tip to another... bet there are a lot out there...

And the men are not as thick as they make out to be are they... saying that... why can't they still use a washing machine?? ;)

Men they can build homes repair cars... apparently read a woman.. but they can't use washing machines.. speaking of which forgot 2nd load waiting to go on line.. bbl.


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## Bushmumma

Sooo great ladies I'm tired but pml ATM.. The aim was to make anyone who reads this to smile.... Job well done so far I think.. 

Cutie- you are a pressed ball of fun aren't ya!!? 

Rose- so many sticks, so many colours... OCD? Who cares :) 

Soanxious- you are a just a :sex: machine!! 

Bright- I love that your DH Knows some of the lingo, my DH is slowly learning as I talk to him he questions so much but is learning... Taking a while for someone that thinks he knows everything!! Lol


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## Bushmumma

Oh so so so true! But really my kitchen is looking like by tomorrow it will be bare! Hehe... Wipes face.. Wasn't me ;).


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## Soanxious

im just a love machine.... Or a sex addict as OH calls me hahaha! :rofl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9IyqekXd8H8


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## Soanxious

:rofl: @ BM


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## Bushmumma

Enjoy ladies I'll read up on them all in the morning :) spread the word 'the truth is out' lol night night darlings :hi:


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## Blondish_keg

So the other day I asked the OH to spray some of the lube and it rebounded, from between my legs, not just on to his face but his eye! 

We couldnt get going for agess as we couldnt stop laughing for so long.. 

now thats not a costa coffee convo is it!


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## Soanxious

:rofl: I bet it took ages to concentrate on the "task" you were originally trying to do hahaha

Does it hurt if it goes in the eye? :haha:


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## Tui

Did anyone else look at their partner during sex and just burst out laughing together? Think it was the strain of having to do it AGAIN.


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## Soanxious

I looked at my OH this time as we were REALLY 150% the most we ever have put into this concentrating on "operation 2015 Baby" and whilst we were dtd I said..what if it THIS moment that will change our lives forever and make a life.. it was a weird feeling and we got goosebumps.. and then we laughed and then OH said.. we must be mad!! dirty nappies.. sleepless nights.. sick.. teething.. and that's just for you to sort out! 

Pardon? I said.. I don't think so.. :haha: 

Oh I just remembered something!!!!

After I ov we dtd and fell asleep.. that night I had a terrible dream... and when I woke up he had already gone to work so I wasn't able to tell him till he got home from work.. my dream was.. he left me the following morning and moved in with a mate and when I went to see him he said it's all too much and I don't want it anymore.. and I burst into tears.. I said but we were ttc last night.. now you change mind? I said well here is a morning after pill, put that in my mouth if your serious.. and he went to.. so I move away from the pill and told him if I was pregnant it was mine.. I burst into tears.. then I woke up.. well I was upset all the following day till he came home.. he was so sad for me.. then afterwards we laughed about it.. but its mad how our brains work...

It is odd actively ttc knowing that you have ov or about to and this could be the time that does it.. it does make you feel silly in one way or another.. well it did for us :)


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## Bushmumma

Blondish- :haha: at the rebound! I could imagine the time it took to get your mind back on the 'job'.. 

Soanxious- that was a really shitty dream, your right though out brains are a little messed up while in this baby making state! 

That was pretty nice of him to say you got the nappies and sick. Don't Spose you thought to say that you'll teach him or give him 1on 1 lessons on how to operate a washing machine!!! :rofl: 

I'm loving this so far! Pretty funny things go on, I'm glad you are willing to share your funny haha :rofl: moments, read others and best of all LAUGH!


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## Soanxious

It's ok already told him he has the spare room.. as his snoring is bad enough for me I have to wear wax earplugs... ;)


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## Tui

Soanxious said:


> It's ok already told him he has the spare room.. as his snoring is bad enough for me I have to wear wax earplugs... ;)

Try getting him to put Vicks Vapour Rub on before bed. After years of DH snoring I have found a cure ! I now sleep perfectly.


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## Bushmumma

Really Tui... In a particular place or just on the chest? That would be great as DH snores and doesn't sleep well himself because of it..


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## Supersmiler

Funny things...

- the fact that hubby knows what EWCM means in a text message
- sending pics of smiley digi ov tests 
- the words, "so do we have to do it tonight then?"
- sneaking into the bathroom to poas, then hubby saying, "sooooo?"
- accidentally leaving the glass of wee on the sink for him to find!
- obsessively looking at old pics of previous positive ov tests/pregnancy tests in case you've forgotten what your looking for
- sneaking onto b&b and stalking the groups, trying not to let hubby see what your looking at
- getting caught by hubby looking at photo galleries of positive opk and BFP tests of countdowntopregnancy website, and him being like "WTF you're looking at other peoples wee sticks now!"

Ha, ha! The craziness is worth it! Xx


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## Bushmumma

Supersmiler- all those are so true! 

I infact thought I was the only one that sneakily gets on here and makes out I'm doing something else :haha: 

My DH looks at pee sticks and says righto get it in the bin!! You pee'd on THAT!!
I was telling him about the different cm types and he looked at me like I was crazy! But had to ask the question how do I know what it looks like....... Well, I feel inside my vagina and inspect what comes out :/... 
Oh that's messed up!! Was his first reply :) 
Now he asks what it's like :).. 
When I explained EWCM he said ' cooked or raw?' 
RAW, huni :) 
Oh, gags and laughs at me.. Just tell me when I've done the job and we are pregnant baby :haha: 

Gotta love em!!


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## Soanxious

Supersmiler I thought that was just me! I have done all that too hahaha :haha: :rofl: x


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## cutieq

DH knows know my tatas are sore as heck! He gets into bed later than me last night and is feeling frisky. He makes a few moves, I feel them but ignore. Then he goes for the boob and squeezes HARD! :growlmad:

DTD for kicks. I get up to use the restroom and he says "oh man you're getting rid of all of them!" To which I respond, I'm already at full capacity. We'll find out Friday :thumbup: He has no idea how TTC works or anything about the window, but I'm always amused at these random little convos we have.


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## hop

Does anyone else do the thing where you try to casually touch or squeeze your boobs throughout the day to see if they are sore or tender?

I do it all the time at work. I probably could just sneak into the bathroom, but I always just try to figure out how to do it at my desk.


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## Soanxious

I grope my boobs at least 20 times a day in my tww and after I get a bfp... a few times i've been spotted doing it in supermarkets LOL.

Any other woman in her tww or early pregnant knows what they are doing... for men and women who have no idea what we are living with then to them we maybe a little odd.. I don't care personally :rofl:


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## brighteyez73

LOL, I do it all the time and I know other people think I am either crazy or freaky. DH always asks me why are you feeling yourself up and I say with a smirk because I love the way they feel. And he gives me the is she serious smirk. LMBO I love messing with him.:haha::rofl:


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## Bushmumma

Ahahaha.... I do it too!!! But I'll get DH to do it coz if it hurts I tell him and he says with a sad face 'but that was really gentle'... 
Hmmm... But it hurt, so now they are OUT OF BOUNDS!! 

After a bit, I'll tell him I was joking :rofl: he doesn't like my jokes :haha:


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## Blondish_keg

I am surrounded by lactating women so I am not out of place but when they are really sore just find any excuse to give a teaching session on hand expressing and then no one knows any better!


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## Soanxious

Cutie my OH is insulted when I evict his :spermy: when time is not right ;)


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## Soanxious

lol Blondish ;)


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## Bushmumma

Lol @ blondish... I like how you roll!


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## Blondish_keg

Hehehe thanks, we have to laugh or else I guess then men with white coats would be after us all.

BM - You said somewhere that you just downloaded the app, is that the same as this website? https://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/

I haven't be able to find it, but that website is my bible in TWW and I hate to think that I am missing out on something..
P.s. you PM inbox is full?


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## Bushmumma

Blondish- I emptied it but nothing has come through from you darlin... Please send it again and I'll reply :) sorry...

Sorry if I said downloaded I'm meant joined... I'm not sure how it works properly as yet but a bit more of a play on it and I'll work it out :) 

DH asked me what my cm is like today.. Oh it's still the same like the last few days thick creamy and white... 
Ah..... I could see him thinking of something smart to say and he finally comes back with I've got the coffee you've got the cream.... 
I nearly vomited and he was :rofl: at me..
That is the most grossest thing you've said to date huni.. 
Hehe I know but I had to say it.. :haha:

Oh they way his minds works sometimes is so far gone!! Yuk!! But funny :) 

Sorry if that's to gross for some but I had to share it..


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## Soanxious

Lol... when I had my 2st daughter my OH wouldn't help me out with her when she was born and one day when he asked for tea I made it and added some breast milk as well as cows milk and told him after he drank it.. I said.. next time I ask for help..help me.. not have me running around after you too ;)


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## Bushmumma

Ahahaha, I've done that countless times! It's great, I love it :) spot on :rofl:
I loved bf'ing mind you I was kinda like a wet nurse I had enough milk to feed half of the 3rd world countries!!! I'd stay it everywhere because as soon as bubs cried for some boob it just squirted out like a fire hose... I could not put it in his mouth until it was only a slow stream of milk otherwise I'd have drowned him.. It would squirt without force 5m away :rofl: can you imagine the visitors that got 'MILKED'?! :haha
:


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## Tui

Bushmumma said:


> Really Tui... In a particular place or just on the chest? That would be great as DH snores and doesn't sleep well himself because of it..

Sorry only just popped back in for a read. Yes put it on his chest, neck under his nose, on his pillow, anywhere and everywhere! Worth a try. I'm all bunged up at the mo so I've been using it too. Great stuff.


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## Bushmumma

Yeah I love it, use it all the time for myself and kids but DH would rather sleep outside with the horses than having Vicks put on him... But I'll try anything :).. Thanks lovely


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## katestar53

This thread is so funny! My hubby once caught me squatting in the bedroom with my finger up my noo noo (I was checking my cervical position!) and he proper freaked out! But he's kinda use to it now. But he still hates talking about it all. He just says to let him know when his swimmers are needed!


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## Bushmumma

Kate effin lol!! :rofl: things they see and hear must make them wonder about us :)...


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## Tui

I'm not allowed to say "cervix" my DH hates that word! I tried telling him about CM but I could see he really didn't want know. Like you say, they just want the nod when it's time to baby dance.


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## Bushmumma

That's about right, that's the main part anyhow... They know they are important, leave us to everything else like normal and come in on the good bit! :rofl:


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## Tui

Sounds like life (men) in general !


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## Ummi2boyz

This thread is so so funny!

Dh doesnt know anything about ttc (except the good bits ^^). I only tell him acter I o'ed. Timing is not an issue so that's ok on this part. 
Except that this cycle is a medicated one, so he had to know that it was time to get to work. And. I told him what the doctor said: 'if your dh is tired you can dtd every other day'
And he replied 'oh hun! I do t like people telling me what to do' with a sad voice. 
I just had the trigger yesterday and we had a right laugh when dtd!! Omg! That sound so bad!

Anyway, i hide my poas addiction from him. Like a real drug addict you know. I hide the sticks and keep checking on them every day until af comes. 
We were staying at my in laws for about 3 months, so that was awful re: poas. Has to take my tests in the bathrrom with me everymorning, pretending the bag I used contained my shampoo (as if I couldn't leave my shampoo in the bathroom) and the toilet there are outside the bathroom, so was taking the whole bag in there with me! 

When tww is over, I carefully wrap all the useless bfn tests in a plastic bag (I try to fing the like black ones they give you in shops) or even two and then throw it in the bin. So no one know what's in there. I still do that now at home!!!

Oh and I also line up my tests!

I used to send dh txt messages to leg him k ow my opk were positive, but thankfully I'm not using them anymore. (Here is trying to cut down on my addiction)


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## Bushmumma

Hahaha, that's funny! I have lined mine up this time... Started testing at 8dpo! Now on 13dpo... And sometimes two tests a day!! Pretty shocking really :haha: DH is away at the moment so mine neatly placed on my coffee table with a tissue user them. :rofl: at self!!!

That must have been crazy at the in laws.... Hmmm shampoo in the loo!! Wonder what if at all they were thinking?? :haha:


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## Ummi2boyz

I don't really, they already think I'm crazy anyway! Really I do weird thi gs sometimes ^^ oh and I did not have plastic cups to wee in, so I used my deodorant cap (cleaned it before and after obviously). But that was on the advice of a b&b member - not my fault!!!:laugh2:


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## Tui

Ummi :rofl: got that picture stuck in my head now!


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## Bushmumma

Ummi- that is very resourceful I must say :haha:


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## Bushmumma

Just spoke to DH on the phone.... Are you pregnant baby? 
Me: I think so :)..
DH: I think so too, I have this 'feeling'. 
Me: what feeling?
DH: have you been POAS?
Me: yes
DH: when? 
Me: this morning... 
DH: yesterday? The day before and the day before that? 
Me: Nooooooooooo.......:haha: I'll be testing again in the morning baby today's have a very very faint line... 
DH: your gunna become one of those POAS addicts aren't ya??
Me: yes.
DH: ewww... Pee fingers!!! 
Me: I'll wait for you to get home to see the test hey?
DH: No! I wanna be on the phone when your POAS ok!!
Me: I'll send you a picture of the result baby.. 
DH: yes, yes, send me a picture of your pee stick then.. :haha: 

He said to me don't move in bed tonight and don't snore at all... You'll rattle the baby loose. Just stay still and let it snuggle in ok huni.. 
I'll i could do was :rofl: and say I know baby... We want this on to stick... Yes yes stick let it stick!!! Lol


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## Tui

Oh bless him xx


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## Soanxious

aww so cute!!

I have had a rotten day from hell with panic attacks etc.. and its all from not being able to ttc this cycle.. and now my bloods are taken the dread of results.. in one way I want them to say I have Antiphospholipid Antibodies so they can treat me and I can have a normal pregnancy.. well I thought lets make the most of DTD whilst I am not "fertile" so seduced OH.. he got all panicky.. saying.. I thought we couldnt DTD for 6 weeks.. I said no I cant get pregnant this cycle.. he said yeah.. we cant have sex for 6 weeks.. I said all this temping cm checking and poas for ov and getting pregnant 5 times in 7 months you dont think I dont know when it is safe to have nookie?.. I said we have a week of fun.. then you can keep away from me for a few days... men.. they think they know it all when ttc.. but deep down they have no clue.. lol


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## Bushmumma

No clue, is so right! But he'll be happy to get down an dirty :).. No pressure from anywhere :) that's gotta be good!!


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## Soanxious

Yeah... well he was enjoying the baby making too LOL


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## Blondish_keg

My DH loves the search for better lighting, as if the right light can transform a negative into a BFP


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## Soanxious

Bless...


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## Soanxious

My OH says I am like this a week after OV.. I think its because Im mostly pregnant... but yeah I had what I wanted now bugger off...LOL......
 



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## Ummi2boyz

Hahaha! Love it!


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## katestar53

That pretty much sums it up!


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## Bushmumma

In town today and DH says baby you go into the chemist and get your pee sticks, they are gunna think you've got a problem :).. I said please come in with baby... Please....... Yeah righto. We goes in and he's like here take these, prognosis tests... Ah no huni, not them!! I need frer! Huh? 
Oh first response ones huni.. Hmmmm.... He grabs me three boxes of 3 packs and says I just can't go to the counter with you they are going to know you are addicted to peeing on sticks! :haha: he laughed so hard. I gets to the counter and the lady looks at the boxes but couldn't look at me lol...in the car and he says.. I know you have a POAS addiction baby :) he followed by saying I need to attend POASA (POAS anonymous) :rofl: I must love you my darlin... Coz I don't care you have enough for 9days now when you run out get some more <3 

It was pretty sweet :)


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## Soanxious

Your not a true POAS addict until you use 3 a day hahahaha!!! :rofl:


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## Bushmumma

Done with the shitty fr I got last week! Feeling really emotional about flushing my pee wondering if it was that pee that held the line! Is sad :haha:


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## Soanxious

Yeah its horrid...


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## Bushmumma

Time for the POAS anonymous group to begin!! :haha: 
Www.poasag.org :rofl: it's perfect!!
Header
If you pee on a stick three or more times a day in TWW please come join! You are NOT alone :rofl: 

Is POAS more important to you than ................ Please fill in. :) 

Ahahaha would be priceless!


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## Soanxious

hahaha.. open up a poas addict page here in B&B :rofl:


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## Bushmumma

Ahh yes! Magical ima do it! I'll be know soon as the Sheila that starts all funny pages! Serious? BM? No never :haha: there's so much more to TTC than regime and sex there's POAS!! For what ever reason you want just POAS! :rofl: righto doing it now!


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## Ladybirdgb

OMG I have been nearly wetting myself reading this thread I love the crazy things we do and the fact that you all have such lovely supportive partners who understand exactly how important this is to you


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## Soanxious

hahaha nice one BM!!

hey.. found 101 ways NOT to get pregnant.. you so gotta read this.. its Hilarious!!! :rofl: https://www.101waysyoucantgetpregnant.com/2009/03/04/1/


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## Soanxious

Yeah Ladybird it does lighten the mood when we are down or stressed :D


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## Ladybirdgb

OMG the fact that these questions have been asked is sad but oh so funny:haha:


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## Ladybirdgb

Soanxious said:


> Yeah Ladybird it does lighten the mood when we are down or stressed :D

Its cheered me up Soanxious im now also going to be looking at cm regularly lol my husband knows im nuts anyway so he wont notice the difference


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## Soanxious

haha.. men get to know so much more about a womans body when ttc ;)

It wont be long and you will be joining the POAS addict page ;) https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/t...as-addicts-welcome-talk-anything-do-poas.html


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## Bushmumma

Haha read and pissed myself laughing!! What a crack up, hope cutie gets on and has a look at it she'll think it's hilarious :rofl: 

Yep feel free to come and share your open or hidden POAS addiction once you have it ladybird :).... Coz you will :haha:


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## Ladybirdgb

OMG I told hubby yesterday about my new obsession re ttc and he said im mad he then told me about a story he had heard r a lady who bought a burger from mcdonalds.

She was eating the burger and it had on it what she thought was mayo she licked it and it was not mayo :nope: she admitted that she knew the all to familiar taste :spermy: im sat there thinking what a waste lol. She then developed blisters around her mouth and is sueing the burger chain as expected. 

The funny part then was my hubby said I am going to contact mcdonalds and offer my mayo for extra income lol to which I responded you bloody wont I need your mayo :haha:

Mayo is our new code word and I cant believe we have discussed this after reading your posts yesterday lol


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## Bushmumma

I'm never ever ever letting my kids enjoy maccas again, they get it about once every two months now so I hope they don't miss it! 
How on earth did the 'Mayo' give her blisters??? Ewww... That's some messed up Mayo :haha:


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## Soanxious

So glad I am vegetarian lol


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## Ladybirdgb

I know bushmumma really messed up mayo :shrug:


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## Soanxious

AS my dr may not possibly give me 5mg folic acid.. I am now going to be buying these and taking 13 a day.. https://www.tesco.com/groceries/Product/Details/?id=273234835 so glad there is a buy two get one free offer...

So when BD im gonna rattle... so imagine intimate time... :sex: and OH wonders what on earth is happening.. its like a childs rattle in my tummy.. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8UnuTvElzQ


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## Ladybirdgb

lol soanxious why are you taking 13??????


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## Soanxious

Not yet... but they are the tiny 400micro measurements and I want 5mg LOL waiting for the dr to ring me back to see if they will give me 1 tablet per day of 5mg folic acid.. lol


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## Bushmumma

Honey I swollowed the kid!! :haha: 

Oh dirty mind kicks in and straight away thinking of another senario to match that catch phrase! :rofl:


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## Ladybirdgb

BM you one bad mama lol 

Soanxious don't see why they wont give it to you they freely give it out when you are pregnant


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## Bushmumma

Oh hush!! You know you were thinking the same thing!! :haha: effin lol


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## Soanxious

Not my surgery.. I asked as I had it on all my other children.. and I was told NO.. I have made a formal complaint about that Dr as he had a go at me for getting pregnant at 40.. last October.. said I was stupid and idiotic for thinking I could have a baby at my age..


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## Bushmumma

Really???? What a pompass arsehole! Hope you told him where to shove his opinions!


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## Soanxious

I made an appt with practice manager and spent an hour there making my complaint and going over previous problems I had with him.. she said he was winding down now and retiring.. I think he ends this yr there.. she had 5 other complaints on the day I had problems with him..so think he was on a final telling off.


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## Ladybirdgb

:gun::gun::gun: that's what that stupid old man needs I can not believe that a doctor would speak to you like that. Im 38 and when I spoke to my doc she said that older mothers are becoming the norm now. OMG I am literally in shock that he would be that awful is he the only doctor there can you not see a different one????

BM yep I was lol :haha:


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## Bushmumma

Glad to hear that :). I had a problem with a dr at the hospital when mc was happening, he showed no empathy, warmness or regard to my condition at all.. Told me get over it and there's nothing more to do... My dr was not available at the time so even though this other on call dr asked my for my drs details telling me he would send over the info he never did... I got a call from my dr to check up on me asking how was my pregnancy and I broke down on the phone. He had not been given the details of my hospital visit at all! He was as I expected very sorry and caring and said to make the complaint to head of north west nsw board, I did and the gentleman I spoke with was sickened by this... Got it sorted and as soon as I concieve again he wants to be in the loop to be sure it doesn't happen to me again.


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## Ladybirdgb

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs: to you both there are some very insensitive people out there


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## Soanxious

sounds like you had a bad time too BM :( some horrid docs out there..
I now see a female GP she is lovely.. but I forgot to ask her about the folic acid last week as I was so upset having to tell her I lost another 2 to chemicals...

girls I just done 2nd ov test as I had a normal pos this AM and wanted to see if it was deffo a pos and not my vitamins in wee making it dark and look at this!! never before have I had a pos go so dark on the test line that the other line almost fades out... see how can I let that go? to me that is saying STRONG EGG!!!
 



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## Bushmumma

Yep not cool at all :/.. I say that's a mighty fine egg waiting :)


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## Soanxious

and im TMI




dripping with EWCM!! im weeing and EWcm running outta me when I wipe!

Im not wasting this egg.


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## Bushmumma

Don't waste it.... Go for it :) FXD for you to catch this little egg! It's a beauty :)


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## Soanxious

I hope so.... and if its not.. well at least I tried...


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## Bushmumma

Yep that's right huni :) give it your all and rock the bed tonight!!!


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## Soanxious

OMG look at my ferning!!!
 



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## Bushmumma

Righto..... You can't refuse this egg!! You simply can't! It's screaming at you..... Holy crap on the only month your not supposed to and it's calling out to you :haha:


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## Soanxious

I know!!! it cant be neglected... its saying.. COO EEE im about to pop out and I want to meet Mr :spermy: so GIVE HIM TO ME NOW!!!!!!!!!


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## Bushmumma

That's right so what I was saying! This rgg means business you don't mess with something like this! This is in your fave proof that your egg wants :spermy: and will stop at nothing to get it... Good luck tonight my darlin :). Talk soon I'm off to bed xo


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## Ladybirdgb

Fx soanxious that you get your sticky bean x x x x.


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## Soanxious

Thank you ladybird.. I hope I catch this one xx


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## brighteyez73

Hello ladies I have signal now. We're heading back, it was so much fun. How is everyone?


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## Soanxious

Hey Brighteyez.. hope you have had a brilliant time!! hope your temps stay up xx


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## brighteyez73

Soanxious - we did! It was wonderful! I don't agree with when ff says I o'd but who cares this month was a bust for charting, I was too busy enjoying the DH.


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## Soanxious

That's the main thing... just you two and the Lurrrve on the Lurrrve Boat LOL... ;)


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## brighteyez73

LOL too funny!


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## kerri28

My birthday was last week right before I ovulated. My girls aske if they could eat the pineapple I had on the counter ripening. I said no we will get a different pineapple because mommy needs to eat the whole pineapple next week even the hard part in the middle because it helps a baby grow. So they were at their dad's house (my ex husband) for my birthday and they got me presents. I open a gift bag and it's two giant pineapples with a card that said " Happy birthday make us another baby sister!" How akward that was in front of my ex husband but OMG my girls are the best!!! Only 11 and 12 and they get it!! <3


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## Soanxious

Oh Kerri that is amazingly beautiful!!!! awwww and for your ex husband to help out too.. thats so kind haha :haha:


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## Bushmumma

Hello Kerri!!!! Welcome!! I'm glad you are right for a pineapple in the near future ;). Now I'm glad the girls helped out, as long as when they are older they eat shitloads of pineapple and complain to you as to why they are not pregnant yet!!! :rofl: 

BRIGHT my darlin welcome back! So glad to hear you enjoyed your DH and your holiday ;). Missed ya loads and I gotta ask: ya got any stories from ya trip?? For this thread only :haha: :hugs:


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## brighteyez73

BM - Thanks dear, I had a wonderful time. And yes we were BDing on the balcony of the room, after we finished he said lay on the floor and put you legs up on the balcony and watch the waves. I laughed so hard (TMI) I trickeled some pee out:rofl:. He really was trying to be helpful.:haha: My temps are dropping so I know I am not pregnant, disappointed a little but I'm ok.:thumbup:


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## Soanxious

Oh brighteyze Im just hoping its bad temping and it will rise again for you.. sounds Beautiful on the balcony.. did you have spectators from above left and right? :rofl:

Now I know why they charge so much for the balcony rooms.. more room with a view than I expected!! :rofl: xx


Kerri such exciting news u want to share in this room??? ;)


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## brighteyez73

:rofl::rofl: Soanxious - exactly! And we thought we heard someone on the left a couple times. LOL. I hope ff is wrong and countdown is right. But if not its cool!
 



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## Soanxious

Your still above the coverline so FX it goes back up..

so instead of naming the baby cruise.. you can call it Flasher!! haha :rofl:


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## brighteyez73

Soanxious - I like that name "flasher":thumbup::haha:! Do you think countdown is more accurate? You are so positive, supportive and motivational! Thank you so much!!! :hugs::hug:


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## brighteyez73

Also, we won the the Love and Marriage game on the cruise. Which was fun, we won a gold plastic trophy on a stick and a bottle of champagne!!!:haha::happydance:


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## Soanxious

Im not sure what is what with the charts.. I seem to get on with FF because I can add it to my page here... I have not used countdown this cycle to chart... I may input my details later and see if it comes up with the same as I have with FF this cycle :)

We need some PMA(positive Mental attitude) here hun.. and Im so wishing you your bfp comes soon...

Have you tried taking Vit D? others are raving about pineapple core at the moment to eat 1-5 dpo also... we will try anything.. hey xx


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## brighteyez73

Yeah you right they are very wacky lately. No I havent tried vitamin D but will try next cycle and I will go buy some pineapples too! We will try anything to make this happen.
 



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## Soanxious

Oh hun you look amazing!!!! and looked like you had such a relaxing time too!!! and well done wining the competition... was it the champagnes fault you ended up having to name your next child flasher? ;) xx


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## brighteyez73

Yes it was the champagne fault!! LOL:haha:
 



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## brighteyez73

More pics!
 



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## brighteyez73

And more pics....
 



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## brighteyez73

Last one.:thumbup::wacko:
 



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## Soanxious

I am totally loving all the photos hun!!!! you looked so gorgeous and such a lovely couple... xxx


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## brighteyez73

Thank you very much Soanxious!


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## Bushmumma

Bright!! A bitta :sex: on the balcony is great!!! Now given that your blaming it on champagne, I'd say I know better :haha: so Flasher sounds like a fantastic name for a little boy and of a girl should be Leighkar (leaker) seen you did kinda pee a wee bit!! :rofl: 

Those pictures are bloody wonderful, yous are a pretty sexy looking pair ;). I must tell you I have a fave pic ...... Drum roll please................. The black and white one of yous where your hat is flipped up!! Oooooooo it's beautiful! :) so glad ya had a great time and were able to relax with each other... Missed ya loads though!! :hugs: 

Now not that I know a lot about temping BUT I did predict a dip for So! 
Yours is gunna come back up and stay up!! :) well at least I effing hope so or my predictions are crappy :haha: :rofl: nice to have you back darlin!!!! 

Oooooooo Kerri.............. How aaarrrrrre yooooooooouu?? 

So- you crazy woman! Watchooooo up ya?? Lol


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## Soanxious

at 7am BM I was snoring!!! having mental dreams.. that I have now forgotten about.. and my throat is killing me and I feel like I have swallowed one of your cotton balls... cough cough cough tickle cough !! ERGHHH!!! 

Question... are cotton balls just picked straight off a plant and put in a bag for the shop to sell? and how do you grow the plastic to get the cotton ear bud effect?

loving the name Leighkar :rofl:


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## brighteyez73

BM - :winkwink: thank you thats one of our favorites too! And I love the name Leighkar. LOL:haha::rofl: I also love the name :flasher::flasher: I missed you ladies too! I pray you prediction is right! How are you doing?


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## Soanxious

im ill... got some kinda viral thing.. burning chest n throat n headaches :( blurgh!!

hope your well.. whats happening?


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## Bushmumma

Bright I'm doing very well, will be POAS tomorrow first time OPK tester beginning lol... :) 

So- well you see the growing plastic is very tricky :rofl: 
The cotton balls could be taken straight off the plant and used at home here, we have to take the seeds out first though and then it's soft and lovely. How they actually process is much the same, it gets picked and baled and sent to be ginned, in the gin they seperate seeds and any trashed picked up in the pickers. The seeds gets treated for regrowing and the trash put out in a paddock and stock piled it does break down and then gets worked into the ground. The remaining soft cotton gets send to respected factory's and processed in with ever manner necessary eg, pure cotton balls are washed, dried and spun loosely into the cotton balls we know today and all to my knowledge are completely natural and untouched fibers with no bleaching or chemicals. It's very interesting to watch such a well used commodity grow from the beginning, we do it all right from ground prep to planting watering and picking :) 
Hope I haven't bored anyone lol...


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## Soanxious

No not boring at all.. sounds really interesting... im a little slow here.. but honestly I didnt realise till a few years ago cotton actually grew they way it did.. not till google was invented did I know that!! haha :rofl:

God knows where I thought it came from before!!


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## Ladybirdgb

going to google cotton growth :haha:


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## Bushmumma

Bloody hell So, you funny bugger!! :rofl: 

Lady, it's pretty cool :).. 

Would you like some more info on it from a cotton farmer/ cotton farmers daughter?


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## Ladybirdgb

Go on then bm you will prob tell it better than google :)


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## Bushmumma

Rodger :)..... 
Okky dokky, so we start with hilling up this means to put rows in the paddock, then it gets fertilised with M.A.P and urea. Once hilled up the beds need to be rolled as to give a flat top for the seed to be sown into, also makes planting easier too. In about September weather permitting we start planting. The seed gets sown in at a finger nail depth has it's first water (irrigation) once the plant is about 2-3weeks old it has 3 leaves and it ready to be cultivated, this operation takes out any new weeds that have begun to grow. It then gets sprayed with a big spray. Then cultivated again. Sprayed again and cultivated one last time. As the cotton grows and starts to fill in the tractor can no longer be in the paddock as it damages the cotton. In the beginning of November we put up rotta butts, these allow water to be transferred from a head ditch to the rottabutt with the use of a syphon. We continue to water right through til march mid- end of. Then you begin to watch as all the buds where the flowers once homed have fallen and in there place is a bowl. This bowl contains the young cotton. Inside is wet and creamy like and is in sections like a cut orange, each section has one or more seeds in it. The more seeds per section and bowl the better the yeild. There are on average 18-20 bowls per plant. This year we have an average of 32-41 bowls per plant and we are late for picking as picking normally begins the first week of April. We are still waiting on bowls to open on top before we can pick. Once opened the pickers come on and take all the cotton off the plant and bale it then it goes to the gin for processing. It's very intricate I think but I have grown up with it. Others would think it rather boring I guess lol... 

Hope that gives you a little insight into how we grow cotton. I'll upload a picture of our cotton from about 6 weeks ago to give you an idea of what I'm saying ok :)
 



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## Soanxious

ohhhhhhhhhh so they are hard like a shell on outside and fluffy n white inside??

Cool!! sounds like hard work.. but must be lovely to be outside a lot... well as long as you dont live in UK that is.. lol


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## Bushmumma

Yeah hard outta shell to protect it while it grows then it cracks open slowly an dries as it opens and then you have white fluffy cotton... At the end before picking the paddock looks as though it's been snowed on! Pretty incredible to see I'll send more pics for yous to see it's very lovely!


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## Soanxious

OMG Girls... I am crying laughing!!!!:haha:

I was looking at different places to visit with my GD when I visit her in Birmingham when I saw the Birmingham Wildlife Conservation Park, so thought I would Tripadvisor it.. 

The 1st review I saw was this one!!!!!!!!!!!!!:blush:

I can't stop crying laughing at such a stupid thing to say.... how can you stop nature from mating??? Were staff supposed to stop them or advertise it as an X rated show?:dohh:
 



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## Bushmumma

Yep silly lady!! :haha:


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## brighteyez73

Hello ladies,
My temp dropped this morning so I am sure I am out now. But it must not be meant to be because I went home today and got some information that has turned my life upside down. My middle son girlfriend is pregnant. Doesn't it just feels like it's not meant for it to happen for me. Last time I was trying my oldest son girlfriend got pregnant and my grandson is now 1 1/2 years old. So I guess that is God trying to tell me something. My heart is broken :cry: and I am so stressed and confused right now. I will stay on just to keep in touch with you lovely ladies and enjoy all the BFPs.


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## Soanxious

*Brighteyze im so sorry to hear that..but congratulations on having another beautiful Grandbaby xxx



Girls I have had to end my relationship.. it went strange and OH has lost plot...

All info in my journal. Link in my Signature 

9DPO and neg test.. Fate im not pregnant.. can't bring a baby into this..*


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## Bushmumma

Blimey!! What is his worry? Is this fixable So or is it doomed?


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## Soanxious

*over for good.. he wont leave me alone.. hes left work to bang my door.. hes been texting non stop.. got police coming later*


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## Ladybirdgb

Read I hun hes a proper nuts geezer hope he shuffles off soon hun and stops bothering you and your family. 

Wow Bm I am so surprised at how much work goes into cotton farming bloody hell how do you stay awake to :sex: 

Brighteyez don't give up keep smiling xxxxxxxxxx


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## Bushmumma

Haha gotta find time for :sex: or no baby... Strong OPK this cycle so praying we have caught the egg :). I'm 2dpo today so bring on testing!!


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## Soanxious

*I just realised the funny thing I do in the TWW is dump the  donator!!! *


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## brighteyez73

Hello eveoryone,

How is it going ladies?

AFM - I had my HSG today and my right tube looks blocked which was a bummer. But hey that's been my life these last couple of days.


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## Soanxious

*hey everyone how are u all?

Brighteyze whats wrong?*


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## brighteyez73

Soanxious - right tube blocked, dh and I have been arguing, son and his girlfriend pregnant, old boss came back and she is a headache, baby boy being harrassed by a pediofile on facebook, nasty old man harrassing my 15 year old daughter on the bus and I am weepy all the time. Emotions everywhere and frustrated. Other than those things im peachy! LOL


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## Bushmumma

Bright huni, I'm sorry life handing you lemons ATM :hugs: I hope things improve for you and your family. Stress is very frowned upon while TTC lol.. Chin up darlin ok :). 

So!!!!! The sperm donator is a dick anyway so dumping him was a great move!! :rofl:


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