# Curious? Anyone NOT giving baby the fathers last name?



## Newdreemz

I'm considering giving baby my last name. Never thought of it before. Just curious. Are you giving your baby daddy's last name?


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## butterflies24

Im not, I made that mistake last time and changed it by deed pole, I dont want my babies to have a different name to me x


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## expecting09

Kacie has my last name


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## laura1991

I did we were together when she was born 
regret it so much now


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## teal

My LO has my surname x


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## RorysMum

my baby has a bouble barrelled last name of mine and his fathers. my mother gave me and my brother her last name despite her being in a long term relationship with my dad. i didnt want to give up my name altogether, but neither did my partner - this seemed best :) x


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## scottishgal89

Are you and FOB together?

I gave LO my last name.

Giving the baby their dad's surname can actually cause problems if he's not around. Eg, leaving the country.

I used mine because I don't get on with FOB and didn't want her to have a different name from me


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## 18singlemom2b

giving the baby my last name without a doubt :) even though his is nicer, haha.


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## Kacie

laura1991 said:


> I did we were together when she was born
> regret it so much now

Same here :dohh:

It would just be a lot tidier on formal things if she had the same surname as me.


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## ReRe

my lo is having my surname even before the breakup with the farther lo was having my second name cause if u come to break up with other half and ur lo has his surname u have to get permission to take them out of the country or something theres some sort of complication apparently


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## SugarKisses

i gave her his and I am regretting it....well not so much regretting her having his name (because the 2 we lost are registered in his name) but I regret she doesnt share my name aswell...I wish I could have given her a double barell name...


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## bloodbinds

Haha, course i havent. Didnt want her to be called Isabella KNOBHEAD. Lol.


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## scottishgal89

bloodbinds said:


> Haha, course i havent. Didnt want her to be called Isabella KNOBHEAD. Lol.

:rofl:


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## suzanne108

Lol Pip!! You crack me up. 

In reply to the OP - LO has my surname. I didnt even think about giving her his surname after we split up. 

xx


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## lou_w34

HAHA Pip!!!

Anyways LO has my surname! It never occured to me to give her FOB's.

xx


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## daisygirl

she's having my surname, his name would go well with her first but i don't want him to have any PR!


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## lou_w34

daisygirl said:


> she's having my surname, his name would go well with her first but i don't want him to have any PR!

Your LO having FOBs surname doesnt give him PR, its putting him on the Birth Certificate that gives him PR :)

xx


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## daisygirl

interesting. so she could have his surname even if hes not on the BC? i just thought if he wasnt on there she'd automatically have mine


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## suzanne108

You can give LO whatever name you want (I think!) X


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## lou_w34

She can... but i think you may need his permission? (I read that somewhere on here, so im not sure how true that is). But i do no that if you wanted to, you could give LO a different surname to you and FOB if you wanted, so whatever name your LO has, it doesnt have any legal implications, like giving him PR.

But if you did give LO his surname, it may have complications for you, as you could have issues taking LO out of the country for holidays etc...

xx


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## lou_w34

suzanne108 said:


> You can give LO whatever name you want (I think!) X

Thats what i thought! But im sure i read that you needed FOBs permission if you wanted to give LO his name, but not have him on the BC? Doesnt make sense really if you could give LO a different name altogether really does it? lol

xx


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## daisygirl

i think i'll stick to giving LO my surname and leaving him off the BC, not that he'll be around to register with me anyway!


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## ~RedLily~

LO has my surname


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## Newdreemz

Thank you..I am not making that mistake again. My last one has a nerve to be a jr!!!!And his father is a idiot. I refuse to that this time time around. I feel better.


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## Mincholada

since i'm from germany and we weren't married it never even crossed my mind to give her his surname although we were in a relationship. somehow i grew up with unmarried people always giving their LO's the mother's name. over here in the US that seems to be different and more people give their LO's the father's name, although not being married.

well, since i'm not with FOB anymore, she'll definitely have mine... which isn't really mine either, as i kept it from my marriage because it works a lot better in english speaking countries than my maiden name "Sass" (notice the ASS!?). so me and her will have the same name, but nobody else in the family :)


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## ReRe

bloodbinds said:


> Haha, course i havent. Didnt want her to be called Isabella KNOBHEAD. Lol.

hahaha gud lass


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## rosie272

bloodbinds said:


> Haha, course i havent. Didnt want her to be called Isabella KNOBHEAD. Lol.


:haha::haha::haha:

Charlie has my surname, never even crossed my mind to give him his!!


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## xJG30

I didn't. Tom took my name. :)


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## samantha.xo

OH and I are still together, but aren't married and my baby will be taking my last name. We do have a rocky relationship, so that's one reason why LO will have my last name. Also it makes more sense for school, dentists, doctors, hospital, and passports as well. OH wasn't very happy, but I put my foot down and no matter how euphoric I feel after the birth - LO will have my last name no matter what.


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## whoops

I like FOB's last name, but not a chance would I ever give my child a different surname to mine, even if we were in a relationship.


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## wishuwerehere

She has my surname, but her dad's surname is one of her middle names. Makes it easier because I'm the one who'll be doing the vast majority of doctors/dentists/schools etc. but he's still part of her name :)


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## MissRichards

butterflies24 said:


> Im not, I made that mistake last time and changed it by deed pole, I dont want my babies to have a different name to me x

exactly same here xx


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## KiansMummy

my lo has my surname xx


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## MrsRabbit

Funny enough when DH and I were talking about marriage I told him I don't like hyphenated names but wouldn't give baby his name if we were not married. Growing up everyone I knew had at least 1 kid before marriage and the kid always got Dad's last name. Now it just seems more practical to keep mom and the kids with the same name.

Not that it was an issue - took forever to conceive DS.


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## QuintinsMommy

Quin has my last name:) so happy with my choice, but FOB isn't in the picture at alll


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## Caitlin.

I gave my baby girl my last name.


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## Neferet

Isaac has my last name. Me and FOB were never together, so I never even considered giving him FOB's last name.


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## Second Chance

I will tell you I had my son on june 23rd and I gave him my last name, his father is not in his life nor does he want anything to do with our son, so I think it is the best idea to give YOUR child your last name... But thats just me, to each his own! If you need to talk I am here


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## midwestbelle

I gave him my last name. Despite the protests from FOB and his family. The one thing I stood up to them about. :thumbup: and FOB is very involved in baby's life.


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## Second Chance

Its still your decision to make, in my opinion your child should have your last name if it happened to be his too great! But UT should be yours


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## surreysharon

will be having my surname


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## purpledahlia

She's got my Surname


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## DivaSatanica

I thought I had decided to give Bruce my surname......then I got weak at the hospital and signed for his health card with the two name hyphenated. I registered him yesterday and came to my senses.......he only has my last name.


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## cielsha

my dauhgter has my last name and i'm so proud


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## gemabee

its a lot less common for us extremely proud single mums to give OUR babies the fob's last name than ours.
i never considered givin finn fob's last name for a second.


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## purpledahlia

TBH, I think id of given her my surname even if i wasnt single, but if i was unmarried. I wouldnt want a different name from my kids. So id only give the fathers surname if i was married i think. If i ever get married her name will change too so we always have the same name!


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## scottishgal89

purpledahlia said:


> TBH, I think id of given her my surname even if i wasnt single, but if i was unmarried. I wouldnt want a different name from my kids. So id only give the fathers surname if i was married i think. If i ever get married her name will change too so we always have the same name!

That's what I plan to do aswell :thumbup:


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## xSophieBx

I was going to give lily his last name and then luckily I came to my senses and she now has my surname - phew. Its so much better cos wen we go 2 the docs etc we have the same surname.. I'd hate to have a diff surname to my baby x


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## TattiesMum

lou_w34 said:


> She can... but i think you may need his permission? (I read that somewhere on here, so im not sure how true that is). But i do no that if you wanted to, you could give LO a different surname to you and FOB if you wanted, so whatever name your LO has, it doesnt have any legal implications, like giving him PR.
> 
> But if you did give LO his surname, it may have complications for you, as you could have issues taking LO out of the country for holidays etc...
> 
> xx

All 3 of mine had their FOB's last name as we were married when we had them and it was the norm. after we split up I changed their name to mine by 'common usage' ie 'known as' and that was used by schools, doctors etc. their passports though had to be in their birth name and I never had any problems with taking them abroad on holidays etc :thumbup:

Now they are all adults they have changed their own names by deed poll so it isn't an issue at all :D


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## lou_w34

TattiesMum said:


> lou_w34 said:
> 
> 
> She can... but i think you may need his permission? (I read that somewhere on here, so im not sure how true that is). But i do no that if you wanted to, you could give LO a different surname to you and FOB if you wanted, so whatever name your LO has, it doesnt have any legal implications, like giving him PR.
> 
> But if you did give LO his surname, it may have complications for you, as you could have issues taking LO out of the country for holidays etc...
> 
> xx
> 
> All 3 of mine had their FOB's last name as we were married when we had them and it was the norm. after we split up I changed their name to mine by 'common usage' ie 'known as' and that was used by schools, doctors etc. their passports though had to be in their birth name and I never had any problems with taking them abroad on holidays etc :thumbup:
> 
> Now they are all adults they have changed their own names by deed poll so it isn't an issue at all :DClick to expand...

Ohhh thats good then!! :D
I just read of a few instances where mothers tried to take the children out of the country for a holiday and they got questionned, but that probably doesnt happen often! :)


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## bw1691

I gave my little boy my last name. 
I hoped that me and FOB would stay together and work things out.
I from the beggining was giving him my name and when FOB kicked up a fuss about it i said why is a big problem, if he was serious enough about us then eventually when we got married it would be easy to change his last name...then what happened, three months down the line things have'nt worked out, so glad i never gave baby his name. 
And ive heard a lot of horror stories about taking babies on holiday getting out okay but not getting back in easily because mum and baby have different names.


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## mari72

I have to admit i think unmarried mums who choose to give their babies the fathers name are a bit short sighted. I can understand the whole emotional thing and wanting baby to have a connection to dad but unless you get married then baby will always have a different name to you and why would that be a good thing? My daughter has my name and i told her dad that if/when we got married that i'd change both our names but until that happened it was non negotiable. I know too many women who have found themselves in situations where they bitterly regret giving baby FOB surname-and nothing to do with a bad break up just the reality of picking your child up from school and being called mrs 'ex boyf name' and the general fact that your own child doesn't even have your name! Let's face it you wouldn't do it if you weren't full of pregnancy hormones and all the sentimental rot that fills your brain with xx


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## leoniebabey

i gave him his dads name as at the time i was in a very controlling relationship and i felt as if i had to, very much regret this

i would say unless your in a steady relationship then give them your name if you and the father stick together it can always be changed before they go to school, but its much harder to change it back if you cant get FOB consent


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## angelpkj

this is something im finding hard to think about now
FOB finished me at 5months pregnant,he has another child who is 5 and she has her mothers maiden name
i really want baby to have FOBs name 
but starting doubting now

i think FOB will be around at times 
but in regards to if he deserves to have that "right" as a father for baby to have his last name im not to sure anymore

startin to think hang on,i've been there and loved baby from day one,im 6 months pregnant and hes only just decided he wants play dad so i feel like i deserve a part of me in babys name


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## Newdreemz

angelpkj said:


> this is something im finding hard to think about now
> FOB finished me at 5months pregnant,he has another child who is 5 and she has her mothers maiden name
> i really want baby to have FOBs name
> but starting doubting now
> 
> i think FOB will be around at times
> but in regards to if he deserves to have that "right" as a father for baby to have his last name im not to sure anymore
> 
> startin to think hang on,i've been there and loved baby from day one,im 6 months pregnant and hes only just decided he wants play dad so i feel like i deserve a part of me in babys name

I know how you feel. but I do think at the end of the day if he's not married to you, or even at least your fiance then it would probably be best to give the baby your last name. I probably would have given my baby FOB last name had I not read all of these replies. 

My last son is a Jr, and his dad is hardly around. And HE WANTED ME to make him a Jr! I just went along with it :growlmad:The irony right? I regret that. I regret it so much I have thought about seeing if I can change my son's last name to mine as me and his father were never married. So I just could not see myself doing this again. but I know how you feel.


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## angelpkj

i think its easier to seek forgiveness than permission

so itl be easier for him to "forgive" me and get over baby not havin his last name
than to find permission to change babys last name if need be


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## lilgemsy

Up to now, I plan to give my baby a double barrelled surname.
Mine first, then FOB's.
It may change though to just mine as I dont think FOB really deserves to let his name be carried on through my child if he doesnt even bother with him =/
We'll have to wait and see what happens though really.


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## Linz88

i didnt.. and not even just because hes a twat.. i want all my children having my last name.. even if i marry.. my child wil have my maiden name xx


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## karmah

This was a regular disagreement when I was with my LO's father. He adamantly wanted strictly his last name, I would only conceed to my name only or my name-then his. My older son has my last name and this is something I am quite happy with! Now that my baby's daddy has disappeared I can go ahead and give it my name. Which was what I wanted the whole time anyways! lol I was trying to be agreeable by suggesting both our names.


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## rosie5637

when i had my son i gave him his fathers surname. although we weren't together i was a bit old fashioned and i also thought that his dad would change his mind and be a part of his life. the other thing was that my own surname was my married name so it would've felt weird to give him that name, not mine to give iyswim.

i regret this now though. his dad never came back and is not on his birth cert.:dohh:

i have recently changed back to my maiden name by deed poll and i think when my son is a little older i will ask if he wants to change too. i am hopefully going to have 1 or 2 more children via AI and so they will have my surname and i think maybe my son would feel different if he were the only one with a different name.

wish i could turn back time. then i would've changed my name back before my son was born and given him my name:dohh:


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## HanaLu

I've been lucky in some sense with my Angel. It was a no questions asked that he wouldn't have his FOB's surname as he wasn't interested and still ademently states my Billie isn't his (and also that I was stupid naming my little boy) But I did give him my OH's surname as although he's not technically a relation to him, he was and still is a fantastic support through all of this. So on my LO's plaque we're having made up, I've asked for Billie to have his Daddy's surname and OH doesn't yet know. 


I know it's different to everyone elses situations in the fact I'll never accidentally get called the wrong name at the school gates, but I felt it was the right choice for me.


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