# Not Waiting After Miscarriage - Any One Else?



## HPmum2B

Hello,
I had found out I had miscarried at 14 weeks (baby had died at 12 weeks), I had seen healthy baby at 9 weeks, so it was all quite a surprise). I had a medically managed miscarriage.

MMM was 8 days ago. Bleeding stopped after about 4 or 5 days (with just a bit of spotting). Doctor told me no need to wait to try. My pregnancy tests are not quite negative yet, but we have BD on Friday and Sunday.

Ovulation sticks are currently reading positive, but I am guessing that is being caused by the HCG that is still in my system and not because I am actually ovulating.

I am going to continue to measure with the ovulation sticks for the rest of the cycle as I am assuming it will go down and back up again when I do actually ovulate. But am planning to BD every 2 or 3 days irrespective of what the ovulation sticks says, as I am not going to miss this egg... :)

I actually had serious horn last night, I think it was just down to the fact we had not BD from when we found out the baby had died through to this weekend.

Anyone else out there had a recent loss and planning on jumping straight back on the 'horse'?


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## nevergivingup

Hi Hpmum2B! Sorry we have to meet under these conditions and definitely sorry to hear of your loss:cry: my first loss was at 14 wks and my baby stop growing at 12 as well. The thought of knowing I was Almost over the 1st trimester line was an awesome feeling. But God knows best! 

Well I'm jumping in here with you!! I had my m/c twins in April at 10wks , I tried to wait as long as I could to allow my body to m/c on its own but with all my prior surgeries my body wasn't having that :haha: so my doc made me do a D&C in May. Which I'm kindve bitter sweet about Bc I know everything is out. 

Welp my doc told me and DH to wait 2 cycles before TTC again. And we've decided to wait one! So my first AF came on and stayed on for 5 days and according to FF and every other fertility web page and app I can find I'm due to ovulate on Wed. and Thurs. if this week. So DH and I have already started BD last night and going until my ovulation sticks (o yeah I have to go buy some right quick to make sure I ovulate) read negative. 

So I do hope we both get our rainbow babies this time around!!!
I did the same thing as you when I had my first m/c, ovulating or not I'm still going to BD to make sure I won't miss it!

Good luck to you!!


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## loub127

Hi ladies

First of all sorry for both of your losses. I've just gone through my first miscarriage unfortunately, although not as late on as yours, but it has opened my eyes to the pain and hurt that they cause.

I'm on the tail end of the bleeding now. Luckily for my sanity it has lasted just under a week and has all naturally come away with no medical interception needed thankfully. 

I feel awful about thinking about trying straight away but I feel there is a void that needs filling. I'm hoping ovulation or af won't take too long to come back. I just want to ttc again as soon as possible and try and put this whole horrible experience behind me.

I hope it's rainbow babies all round for us soon x


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## nevergivingup

loub127 said:


> Hi ladies
> 
> First of all sorry for both of your losses. I've just gone through my first miscarriage unfortunately, although not as late on as yours, but it has opened my eyes to the pain and hurt that they cause.
> 
> I'm on the tail end of the bleeding now. Luckily for my sanity it has lasted just under a week and has all naturally come away with no medical interception needed thankfully.
> 
> I feel awful about thinking about trying straight away but I feel there is a void that needs filling. I'm hoping ovulation or af won't take too long to come back. I just want to ttc again as soon as possible and try and put this whole horrible experience behind me.
> 
> I hope it's rainbow babies all round for us soon x

Hi Loub127!

Sorry to hear of your loss!! No matter how early it has been its still very painful to lose something so special and important. 

It's a great thing that your body m/c on its own with any medical help. So your body can get right bk in the game. 

Looks like we're both trying again for #2!! And our boys were born the same year a month apart!! Exciting!!

When do AF usually show Bc it should come bk on on a regular schedule at least mine did, thankfully. 

I'm due to ovulate on Fri-Sat. my sticks are really faint so I'm definitely leading up to ovulation soon

Hope we both catch the eggie together!!!


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## loub127

Thank you :) I feel like people will think I'm silly for getting so upset at an early loss. I never thought for one second that I would lose it after having such am easy pregnancy last time with no first tri complications. Maybe I was being naive.

So should I expect to see AF on the normal cycle going by dates before I got pregnant? I hate not knowing when it's going to come! 

I just can't wait to make my little boy a big brother. He's so ready to have a sibling now, I just want so badly to be able to give him that.

Exciting times ahead hopefully for all of us! Time to make our 2013 babies big brothers! :)


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## HPmum2B

Hi Ladies, thanks for joining me.

I am also sorry we meet under these circumstances, and I don't think it matters how far along you are, it is still a very painful experience.

Well I was a little frustrated yesterday as my bleeding seemed to start up again, but it seems to have stopped again today and my ovulation sticks are now reading negative, so I hope that means I am back on track.

Loub - I am hoping to catch an egg before I get my first AF. But obviously it makes it harder, because I don't know when AF is due, so don't know when I might ovulate. I have never used ovulation sticks in the past, or used any other method to predict, we seem to have always managed to just catch the egg by chance. I don't want to stress over it, but I don't want to miss the egg either.


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## loub127

It's nice to chat to people who have been through the same. I felt a bit lost on where I belonged on this forum for a few days!! 

It would be nice to catch the next egg before af arrives but I'm not feeling hopeful. I'm still spotting at the minute but I almost feel nervous about doing the deed in case we do catch the egg and the same thing happend again. I just don't want to be a nervous wreck!! 

I was tempted to get some ovulation tests but hubby doesn't agree with any of that. He thinks it's a bit over the top!! Hopefully the ovulation tests will help you.


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## HPmum2B

I have got to admit, hubby does not know I am peeing on them every day. He likes sex to be about sex and not about making babies... I schedule it by setting the mood, he does not know it has been scheduled. Lol.

I know what you mean about not fitting in, in have never really 'tried' to get pregnant before.


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## nevergivingup

loub127 said:


> Thank you :) I feel like people will think I'm silly for getting so upset at an early loss. I never thought for one second that I would lose it after having such am easy pregnancy last time with no first tri complications. Maybe I was being naive.
> 
> So should I expect to see AF on the normal cycle going by dates before I got pregnant? I hate not knowing when it's going to come!
> 
> I just can't wait to make my little boy a big brother. He's so ready to have a sibling now, I just want so badly to be able to give him that.
> 
> Exciting times ahead hopefully for all of us! Time to make our 2013 babies big brothers! :)

Sorry ladies I'm so behind. Just got back from dinner with my family. Loub127 usually once your m/c bleed start and stop then your first AF should come after that. As soon as I stop bleeding from m/c (2wks) my AF came on the same date as it usually does b4 I was Prego. And I was expecting 10wks with twins, so it didn't throw anything off. When I m/c the 2nd time at 5wks my cycle came right back on the next month too. So I say give your m/c time to bleed itself out then hopefully it'll stop and your AF should be coming along. 

It's never naive to think you're going to have a normal pregnancy Bc that's how we suppose to think. Positive right! I did the same thing, I figured I had enough m/c's to last me so I felt like this lady pregnancy was going to make it, I even went out and bought two "big brother shirts"!! Now that's what you call naive :dohh: I won't do that ever again Bc now they're hanging up in my boy closet at the back where i can't see them. I know exactly how you feel my little boy sees all his cousins have bros and sisters except him, it hurt me so to hear him ask me about their bro n sis and not have one of his own. 

But I am trying and trying I've gained over 80lbs since I got married trying to have more babies but all I get back is weight and more weight from all the m/c's. 

I'm hoping n praying this time it's my time, our time! 

I love Ovulation sticks Bc it really helps to pin point exactly when I ovulate so I won't have to play the guessing game and regret it if I missed it. Like today my sticks are very light so I won't BD tonight but I'm due to ovulate on this Fri-sat so I will start BD Tomorrow through Sat.

My hubby prefer the ovulation sticks Bc DTD can become tiresome with our busy schedules.


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## Mattsgirl

Hi ladies can I join you! My MC bleeding started May 15th. I decided to let my body do it naturally. I started doing opk's a week after bleeding stopped but considering how slow my hcg was going down I decided to stop so I didn't waste them all. It took 4 and a half weeks for my hug to get down to 1 then AF appeared 4 days later. My doc told us to wait 2 cycles but that's just not gonna happen. I'm upset that last cycle got screwed up. Will be starting opk's on Saturday which will be cd 13.


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## nevergivingup

Mattsgirl said:


> Hi ladies can I join you! My MC bleeding started May 15th. I decided to let my body do it naturally. I started doing opk's a week after bleeding stopped but considering how slow my hcg was going down I decided to stop so I didn't waste them all. It took 4 and a half weeks for my hug to get down to 1 then AF appeared 4 days later. My doc told us to wait 2 cycles but that's just not gonna happen. I'm upset that last cycle got screwed up. Will be starting opk's on Saturday which will be cd 13.


Hi Mattsgirl!!
Sorry about your loss..:cry: waiting on those hcg levels to drop can seem like forever. Hope you get it this time!!!


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## Mattsgirl

Thank you!! I really hope you get your forever bay this cycle too!


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## HPmum2B

Oh I just feel blah!
I reckon my hormones may have had a big drop or something in the last 24 hours. I started bleeding again last night, I feel exhausted like I haven't slept (despite sleeping for about 9 0r 10 hours solid last night) my tummy feels crampy again.

Maybe I was a little bit too optimistic thinking I was going to be able to catch a egg straight away. Clearly my body hasn't even finished clearing everything out yet.


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## nevergivingup

Sorry HPmum, 
I know exactly how you feel! I thought mine had gone off from my last m/c Bc i stop bleeding but like 6 hrs later I went to use the restroom and blood again :wacko: then it went to very light bleeding to brown bleeding for like 3 days!!! I was like go off already!!! It was so crazy Bc it would be only a drop of brown blood meaning I'm still bleeding and still can't do anything....BUT I was getting closer I just needed the blood to stop. 

Anything was better then carrying my 2 deceased babies around for two weeks waiting for my body to m/c them to learn that I had to have a D&C regardless. 

Hpmum, just think you're closer then you were before, now your body has to do its job by getting your body cleaned out for you to TTC again!


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## nevergivingup

Mattsgirl said:


> Hi ladies can I join you! My MC bleeding started May 15th. I decided to let my body do it naturally. I started doing opk's a week after bleeding stopped but considering how slow my hcg was going down I decided to stop so I didn't waste them all. It took 4 and a half weeks for my hug to get down to 1 then AF appeared 4 days later. My doc told us to wait 2 cycles but that's just not gonna happen. I'm upset that last cycle got screwed up. Will be starting opk's on Saturday which will be cd 13.

Mattsgirl; do you have an idea when you'll ovulate?


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## Mattsgirl

On a normal cycle usually cd 15 or 16. But my cycles hadn't gone back to normal since coming off birth control. So I'm hoping it stays between cd 17 and 19 like it has been.

I know how you feel HPmum. I had crazy heavy bleeding for about a week then it stopped then the next day I started spotting and that lasted for 2 weeks.


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## HPmum2B

Ah thanks ladies, I just so want to be able to get trying again as soon as possible, and when I don't even know if the miscarriage is actually finished I don't know when I will be able to get started... :) Just feeling sorry for myself right now, and sometimes it helps just to talk it out.


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## nevergivingup

Mattsgirl I think I'll probably be ovulating with you hopefully. I do t know anymore myself either....ughhhh! 

HPmum: yes please share, it really helps Bc I have no one else to talk to this stuff about but you all. Bc out of my circle of friends I'm the only one left still TTC while their all pregnant with # 2 or TTC # 3 I feel horrible about myself if I think to much about it and start despising everything and taking it out on my hubby. So I find myself here.....which definitely helps.


Well.....from what fertility friend and every fertility app I can find says I'm due to ovulate today and sat...but my opks are still showing a faint line no blooming line indicating I'm ovulating :cry: I don't know what's going on...I thought after a faint line on the opk indicating it picked up the Surge in your body you're due to ovulate working the next 12-36 hrs...well no dark red line here...now I'm feeling really confused thinking what if I dont...but last time it did take a week of faint lines to get that dark one but I'm just getting impatient.


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## loub127

Hey ladies! I'm still here... had a couple of days away from the forum because I kept going back into first tri and seeing all the conversations I was joining in on and it just made me sad :( I need to stop torturing myself by looking in there because it just gets me all upset. Well I think my bleeding has come to an end. Took 1 week in total. I am still getting a very small amount of yellowy browny type discharge (sorry tmi!!) which I hope is normal?! Occasionally I'm getting the odd AF type cramp but mainly in the evenings when I go to bed.

I'm assuming that my hcg levels are right down now because the last test I did which was last Sunday, which was a frer, was extremely faint.

Going by my previous cycles, AF would be due 11th July but I don't know what's going to happen this month!

Hope you're all doing okay :) xx


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## HPmum2B

Nevergivingup do you check cervical mucus too? I have been reading up on it recently, and I think it would help give me a indication as to when my most fertile days are. Is it worth BDing just in case the fertility friend is right, but keep testing with the OPKs in case it happens slightly later in the month?

Loub127 I reckon we might be in a similar place HCG wise. I reckon the very last of mine dropped off yesterday, because I felt really low... sort of had the blues like a big hormone shift had happened.


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## loub127

HPmum2B said:


> Nevergivingup do you check cervical mucus too? I have been reading up on it recently, and I think it would help give me a indication as to when my most fertile days are. Is it worth BDing just in case the fertility friend is right, but keep testing with the OPKs in case it happens slightly later in the month?
> 
> Loub127 I reckon we might be in a similar place HCG wise. I reckon the very last of mine dropped off yesterday, because I felt really low... sort of had the blues like a big hormone shift had happened.

That's exactly how I've been feeling. My emotions are up and down like a yo yo at the minute. Literally I can be really happy and positive one minute then the next minute I just want to crawl into bed and cry. I just hope something happens soon ovulation wise. I'm watching for all the signs but nothing yet xx


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## nevergivingup

Hpmum2B no I haven't checked cervically in a while, I just usually rely on Opks but since I'm out of opks and don't want to go buy any Bc my family is staying the weekend at our house I think checking cervical mucous might be the best thing right now


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## HPmum2B

Grrr, more spotting today... getting fed up of this... :(


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## nevergivingup

HPmum2B said:


> Grrr, more spotting today... getting fed up of this... :(

Sorry HPmum! I know it's aggravating seeing that blood.. It's just cleaning itself out I reckon. How long have you been bleeding so far?


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## HPmum2B

I went in for a medically managed miscarriage on 19th June. So 15 days now, which I know isn't that long, but my bleeding pretty stopped on about day 5 or so, nothing for 2 or 3 days, then spotting every other day for the last week. Every time it stops I think thats the end, and then the next day there it is again.
Its all old blood now, its more like brown dishcharge, pretty yuck.


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## nevergivingup

HPmum2B said:


> I went in for a medically managed miscarriage on 19th June. So 15 days now, which I know isn't that long, but my bleeding pretty stopped on about day 5 or so, nothing for 2 or 3 days, then spotting every other day for the last week. Every time it stops I think thats the end, and then the next day there it is again.
> Its all old blood now, its more like brown dishcharge, pretty yuck.

I know it sucks but to make you feel better brown d/c is what mine ending off with. It was brown for 3 days then it stopped. So seeing brown d/c is really good Bc it's soon coming to a end. But I know it being off and on is enough to drive me mad.


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## nevergivingup

Happy 4th of July ladies!!!

Well went and bought me another box of opks FRER this time and tested this morning with fmu and got back This....I'm thinking its positive that I'm ovulating?!! 

What do you all think?

I'm hopped on DH twice just in case I wasn't seeing things!!!


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## HPmum2B

I don't know how those ones work? Does it need to be the same or darker than the control line? I would say that is pretty dam close to the control line, so I guess your LH is up... get BDing!! :)


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## Mattsgirl

I would say thats positove but would do one tomorrkw too just to be sure. But happy bding!


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## loub127

That's a positive opk alright! Fingers crossed you catch that eggy! :) 

We did the deed for the first time on Monday since my MC. I have no clue if or when I'm ovulating but I'm guessing we'll just keep doing it regularly and see what happens! When I got pregnant in may we only did it once and that was because I had lots of ewcm so I'm hoping that I get some clues soon!

If I don't then I might get some opk's to help me out!


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## sarah2211

Hi all. I hope you don't mind me jumping in. I'm so sorry for all of your losses. 

We've been trying since November last year and earlier this week I got a BFP. I went to the doctor and he didn't do any blood tests but said I was 5 weeks and to look for a midwife. I was feeling pregnant, the nausea, headaches, exhaustion and sensitive boobs, which the doctor said was a really good sign. 

Yesterday I took a test and the second line was very very faint and then I started bleeding very very heavily. All those pregnancy feelings disappeared. I rung my sister in law who is a midwife and she said to go to the doctor. I went to the doctor who said it's probably all over but because I've had no pains there could still be a chance. I know it's all over but I have a blood test and ultrasound this afternoon to confirm. 

I just feel dizzy and exhausted, probably from the emotions. I know we will just get back on the horse and keep trying. From what I've read, we don't need to wait to try as along as we feel emotionally ready. I've read that we should wait 2 weeks to BD again though. Can anyone clarify? Thank you


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## nevergivingup

sarah2211 said:


> Hi all. I hope you don't mind me jumping in. I'm so sorry for all of your losses.
> 
> We've been trying since November last year and earlier this week I got a BFP. I went to the doctor and he didn't do any blood tests but said I was 5 weeks and to look for a midwife. I was feeling pregnant, the nausea, headaches, exhaustion and sensitive boobs, which the doctor said was a really good sign.
> 
> Yesterday I took a test and the second line was very very faint and then I started bleeding very very heavily. All those pregnancy feelings disappeared. I rung my sister in law who is a midwife and she said to go to the doctor. I went to the doctor who said it's probably all over but because I've had no pains there could still be a chance. I know it's all over but I have a blood test and ultrasound this afternoon to confirm.
> 
> I just feel dizzy and exhausted, probably from the emotions. I know we will just get back on the horse and keep trying. From what I've read, we don't need to wait to try as along as we feel emotionally ready. I've read that we should wait 2 weeks to BD again though. Can anyone clarify? Thank you


Hey Sarah!!! Did you get your results!! I'm hoping it wasn't a loss but just something minor that had nothing to do with baby! Well being that you loss early on I wouldn't wait at all. Of course wIt til bleeding is over so no infections but when I loss at 4wks I got right bk in the ring and TTC again!! Nothing went wrong so hopefully you're in the same boat as I was..


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## sarah2211

Thanks nevergivingup.

Not yet. Still a few hours until the tests. I don't think there can be anyway that I'm still pregnant after the amount of blood I've lost and the lack of pregnancy feeling. 

We don't want to wait, it's been 9 months and this is the closest we've got. We obviously want a baby. But today it's all a bit too much to really think about and thinking that this could all happen again is scary. We don't want to wait, but I'm feeling a bit fragile. If that makes sense..

I'll be seeing the fertility clinic before I O again so I can check in there too. Thank you.


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## nevergivingup

I can understand how you feel about this happening again. That's how I feel now...my last m/c I just knew I wouldn't m/c after 3 yrs of not trying and 1 son I figured I was ok but my body said something else which it was a good thing Bc the babies I m/c had Trisonomy 16 severely misformed with organs outside the body. So our bodies know what's best for us sometimes. Most of the time the speed that do make it are defective Bc of the length they had to swim and last to get to the egg, so our body know what it has to do before we even know or if we ever will. 

I'm scared just like you but I have to just keep trying, until I get my little soldier that fought as hard as I fought for him/her!

Don't give up just let your body get rid of the old and get yourself ready to TTC again for the new. I always hear that you're more fertile right after a m/c!

Fertility clinic sounds great for more definitive answers!


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## sarah2211

Thanks. U/S showed nothing. But she said if it was only 5 weeks they wouldn't see anything anyway. But from the scan I shouldn't need a D&C, everything looks clear. I'm still bleeding and feel faint. 

What really annoyed me was the sonography said 'it's probably 50:50 that you're still pregnant'. I just know I'm not, I know it's gone. I had to tell my husband that he needed to lower his hopes, don't listen to her. I can't have us both feeling like an emotional roller coaster anymore than we already are. 

You're right and I know you're right. It's just that I'm still feeling exhausted and I can't think about anymore just at the moment. I didn't realise there was going to be so much blood and I was just going to feel this nothingness so early on. I'm busy doing something and then from no where I just start crying again. My husband said I look a bit better this evening but I don't feel any better. 

We have to go away tomorrow and visit family we haven't seen since our wedding. I know they'll be expecting a pregnancy announcement and I'm still feeling too raw. I guess it's also the fact that it's been 9 months of trying with nothing. So it's not really a 5 week loss, but a 9 month of trying and 5 week loss. I don't know, maybe tomorrow, when we hopefully get the blood test results, everything will be final and we can just move on.


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## HPmum2B

Oh Sarah, I am so sorry to hear what your going through. I think sometimes if you just know, at it would be easier if the doctor just confirmed it.
I don't know of any reason you would need to wait. My loss was at 14 weeks (baby died at 12, and I had a medically managed miscarriage) and I was told I didn't need to wait.

I think I may be about to ovulate. It seems like it has been forever since my miscarriage was started, but day one of the bleeding was only 20 days ago. My cervix feels high and slightly open. We BD last night, so I am not sure about CM as I think I could be getting mixed up with seamen. Did an OPK this morning and although it is not as dark as the control line, it is alot darker than it has been. I think we will BD again tonight... and tomorrow if hubby has it in him. lol. Don't want to miss this egg!!


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## sarah2211

I found out the results last night, I'm not pregnant so I guess we now know so we can now move on. DH was upset but I knew already. I haven't started temping again yet. I might take a month off. I'm not really sure how I'm feeling about it all at the moment. We are seeing the fertility clinic later this month. 

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. That must have been so difficult being so far along. That is lucky that they you didn't have to wait. I hope that this month will be your lucky one. FX.


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## BowPeep

I had my MC at the very end of March/beginning of April this year. I was only aware that I had been pregnant after I had started bleeding and was advised by the doctor to take a test. I continued to bleed heavily for a further two months and eventually I was given hormones to stop it. The EPU confirmed that nothing was left and that I would be able to try again on my next cycle. I finished the course of hormones and started bleeding normally on the 2nd June. Since then my OH and I DTD a couple of times but not at any designated time (I was not aware of how to track my cycle at that point). I expected to begin bleeding again at the start of the month but didn't, and decided at that point to start keeping a note of my temprature/CF/Weight even though all of the pregnancy tests I had done were negative.
On a whim I decided to give the ovulation sticks a go, to give me a better idea of when I was actually ovulating. To my surprise the tests came back as high fertility on tuesday, wednesday, thursday and friday of this week, but I suspected that this was an error as I was already on day 34. Anyway yesterday the test came back with peak fertility accompanied by telltale cramps. OH and I have DTD a few times this week and yesterday so I have everything crossed it goes well.


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## nevergivingup

Sarah2211: sorry that you're going through this ESP. after 9 months of trying. But glad that test gave you and more so your husband some closure! Hopefully the fertility clinic can give you both some more hopeful answers as to what's going on in there; hopefully it may be something so small that can be fix with little help! Or rather nothing at all!!! Keep us updated on the appt. and make sure you google everything before you go and write down all the questions you have to ask the doc! 



Sorry Bopeep to hear of your loss! Those things are never easy, it definitely take something away from us as women! I'm glad you tried the OPKS Bc trying to guess when ovulation is here after a m/c is very difficult and time consuming. I love my opks although it's pricey.
Hopefully you caught the eggie!! Those cramps are serious! Maybe those hormones knocked your cycle off a bit to ovulate a bit later then usual. 
No matter FX for us all!!!

AFM: I got a positive opk on July 4th, we BD the night before and 2x the day of and 1x the day after! I'm hoping that's enough to get me 2 :happydance:


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## HPmum2B

Sorry for your loss bopeep. Sounds like you are now on your two week wait. I think I am too.

My OPK never did show a completely positive line, but they were darker than normal, I had EWCM for a couple of days and my Cervix was high and open. Also felt a few twinges. Cervix already feels much lower and harder now.

I am going to be watching out for implantation bleeding in around a weeks time. As that is normally the first sign that I am pregnant.

Offically I guess I should test on the 24th, but I am sure I wont be able to resit so will probably start testing around the 20th. I have lots of internet cheapies to use. lol.

Is anyone else waiting to test?


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## nevergivingup

Yes I Am!!! My fertility app says I can possibly test on the 14th based on my positive ovulation on the 4th but I feel better waiting until the 18tg as that will be exactly 2wks!

I have my fx for both Of us!! As I am 5dpo and not one sign except gas and I blame that on constantly eating ice cream and water melon!!


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## HPmum2B

Oh yay! fingers crossed!! :)


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## Dannypop

Hi ladies

So so sorry for all of your losses. Hugs all round!

I started bleeding on Saturday at 6 weeks, passed a huge clot on Sunday and finally stopped bleeding last night. This was on the back of recovering from a vomit bug that got my whole family on Friday! Fun times indeed.

Today was supposed to be my scan at my Obgyn to hear the heartbeat for the first time but instead it became a head to toe examination making sure everything had come away. It was a blighted ovum he said. There is still a little bit of lining left to pass but he checked my ovaries and said I should be ovulating again in 2.5 weeks.

He will send me for bloods next week to check progesterone and call me with the results. He will then see me at the end of next week to scan me and pinpoint when I will ovulate. I am very very very lucky that I have him. He is a fertility specialist so even though I don't have fertility issues he still gets stuck in right away. I am in South Africa where we all are on private healthcare so the level of care is exceptional.

This was my third pregnancy. I have 2 boys (5.5 and 2.5) and I have never had any problems so I was quite shocked when I saw blood. In fact, after the tummy bug I wiped and saw blood but was so relieved as I realised it was coming from my bum (TMI). So when I saw more blood the next day I thought it was my bum again!

Getting right back on the horse and should hopefully be ready to test in about 5 weeks I guess ...


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## HPmum2B

Hi Dannypop.

Sorry for your loss, does sound like you have a very good doctor on hand there!! That must be really encouraging that he is so helpful!

I can relate to the shock, I have also had two healthy pregnancies before this one, and didn't have any problems getting pregnant, and I think it lulled me into a false sense of security, sort of feeling that my body is really good at this, and then bam it happened.
It has really knocked my pregnancy confidence, I have always really enjoyed pregnancy and now think I will be terrified of something going wrong again. In some ways that is why I want to get on with it ASAP, to sort of proove to myself it will all be okay next time.


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## Dannypop

HPmum2B said:


> Hi Dannypop.
> 
> Sorry for your loss, does sound like you have a very good doctor on hand there!! That must be really encouraging that he is so helpful!
> 
> I can relate to the shock, I have also had two healthy pregnancies before this one, and didn't have any problems getting pregnant, and I think it lulled me into a false sense of security, sort of feeling that my body is really good at this, and then bam it happened.
> It has really knocked my pregnancy confidence, I have always really enjoyed pregnancy and now think I will be terrified of something going wrong again. In some ways that is why I want to get on with it ASAP, to sort of proove to myself it will all be okay next time.

Thanks so much! Sorry we are in the same boat with this.

Ah so you're also ttc baby number 3?

It is crazy how we judge ourselves by how our bodies work for or against us when 1 in 6 pregnancies end in miscarriage. I also felt that I was invincible. I never even worried for a second that miscarriage would ever be something I would go through. And I also totally want to just get on with the business of having this baby. Not waiting for a second. Gonna start BDing this weekend!

You are so lucky to be in the 2ww -exciting times! Hopefully you can soon move on to the 1st Tri board! With me on your heels!


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## HPmum2B

Yeah I am trying for my 3rd, funnily enough my loss was not a planned pregnancy, I was actually on the pill (but knew we would have at least 1 more), but once I found out I was pregnant, I started planning for that baby... so now I feel like I need a baby again, iykwim.

I actually didn't really try for my first two, I got pregnant the same month we decided to have a baby. I didn't know about OPKs, cervical mucus or anything like that. In fact, all I knew was you ovulated around the middle of your cycle. And I was very relaxed about the whole thing.

This time round, I feel like I am someone else. I just hope if I get pregnant, or at least when I am comfortably in the second trimester I might be able to relax a bit... its going to be a long 3 months!!


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## Abhiangel

Hey so sorry for your loss.. 
I also had a mc at 7 weeks but had my first af right on time after 4 weeks. Personally i would suggest you to wait for your first af and then go ahead! Just give your body time to heal and your hormones to get in place. Good luck! Lots of baby dust to you &#128522;&#128522;


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## Dannypop

HPmum; and here I thought we were supposed to be more relaxed the 3rd time round! Looks like we got it backwards ... How old are your two?

Abhiangel I am way way too impatient to wait for a cycle to pass!! I wish I was. I am going with the whole "you are 3 times more fertile after a MC" vibe. My Obgyn will be letting me know exactly when to expect ovulation so am not going to waste any potential eggs! Even though I now won't know when I am late for AF.


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## HPmum2B

Hi Abiangel, I too am far too impatient to wait... also I think the longer I leave it, the scarier it will be.

Dannypop, its crazy isn't it?! Mine are 2 and 3(nearly 4). Me and my siblings were all quite close in age and I loved always having someone to play with.
How old are yours?
When are you going back to your doctor?


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## Dannypop

HPmum2B said:


> Hi Abiangel, I too am far too impatient to wait... also I think the longer I leave it, the scarier it will be.
> 
> Dannypop, its crazy isn't it?! Mine are 2 and 3(nearly 4). Me and my siblings were all quite close in age and I loved always having someone to play with.
> How old are yours?
> When are you going back to your doctor?

:dohh:It is crazy!
Mine are 2.5 (3 in Oct) and 5.5 (6 in Dec). 

I was totally not ready for number 3 until very recently when DS2 started to become more independent. There is a 2 yr 10 month age gap between them but somehow I needed a bit more of a break in age this time round. So now the problem I face is having too big an age gap -I don't want it to be more than 3.5 years. I better get to work!

Going for progesterone bloods next week Tues so seeing my doc probably end of next week based on the results. Hoping he will tell me my ovaries are ripening and ready to go!

How things going in your 2WW? I drive myself nuts googling symptoms even though I know it is fruitless as when you suddenly are listening to every tweak in your body everything is amplified and seems like a sign. :wacko:


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## HPmum2B

Oh my TWW is awful... I am overthinking every twinge!

We were not planning number 3 any time soon, but I got pregnant accidently, and got really excited, when I had the miscarriage, we decided to try again.

I expect waiting to see your doctor is probably as bad as the tww... why is they just so much waiting in pregnancy?! Even when you find out you are pregnant, you start waiting for your first scan...lol.


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## Dannypop

Totally! It's like the 2WW until the 2WW.

And then you wait for the 2nd tri and by then you are huge and uncomfy and you are waiting for the birth ... I need to remind myself to just breathe and enjoy my wine and sleeping on my tummy while I still can ...

I guess now the accidental has pulled your focus into how much you actually want this and want it sooner rather than later!


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## HPmum2B

Absolutely.
Oh a fellow tummy sleeper!! Haha.


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## nevergivingup

Hey Ladies!!

Dannypop: sorry to hear about your loss especially when you it comes out of nowhere unexpectantly. I agree your doc sounds Great!! And in South Africa how fun is that to be over there!!! I say jump right bk in the horse as well ESP after an early loss at least I did after my 5wk loss. An the bitter sweet thing about an early loss despite how sad and tragic it is, is that you don't have to wait too long for everything to pass or wait to have surgery to get it out. So fx for you

HPmum: Staying busy?! What DPO are you on now?


AFM: I'm 10dpo, I'm dare not testing any day soon Bc I really don't feel a thing going on in there. Arrgghhh!! Wednesday the 20th is test day and I'm sticking to it....at least I hope to anyway!


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## Dannypop

Nevergivingup you are so right!! At least it was early days and I could pass everything naturally. I actually feel quite unaffected by it now and ready for the next chapter -should be ovulating in about 10 days or so -my doc will give me a clearer idea when I see him in a week-ish.

10 DPO! How I long to be there!! Although it is very bad to wish time away so I shall be patient (all lies).

Don't test don't test! When I felt nothing going on in there that was exactly when I was preg. All the other times when I felt symptoms I wasn't preg.

Good luck and keep us posted!


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## HPmum2B

Ooo 10 days past ovulations... fingers are really crossed tight!! I think I would be testing daily by now if i was you. Don't laugh, but I tested about 2 days past ovulations... because, well, I guess a bit of quality control on the test strips!! ha ha.

So I think I am about 5 days past ovulation now.I am not 100% sure when I ovulated, but I had a couple of days of postive OPKs and a couple of days of ovulation pains, I think the ovualtion pains peaked and ended on Monday (10th), so I suppose that is the days I should take as my ovulation day. But I think I had positive OPKs from the 8th.

I reckon I will cave (again) and start testing around the 20th, but officially I wont expect a positive until around the 24th. I will then be holding it up to the light trying to see a positive.

I have a secret plan (I don't know if I will be able to stick to it, because I am pants at secrets), but I am thinking if I do get a positive, I might not tell hubby. I am expecting to be sent for a reasurance scan (fairly standard in my area if you are pregnant after a loss), and I am going to try and keep the pregnancy a secret until the day of the scan. Kind of so its a nice suprise and takes out some of the worry for OH. But I prob wont be able to keep it to myself.


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## nevergivingup

Gm Ladies!!!

Dannypop those 10 days are going to come so fast but when we're ready to get it started it seems so slow!!! So keep yourself busy until then!! The doctor exact date when you're ovulating is better than any opk stick I can find!! Wish I went to my doc for exact date! What an awesome doc!! What are you planning to do to keep yourself busy?! I needed to hear that about the no preg symptoms and yet you were pregnant. That gives me some hope!

Hpmum: lol, I have a secret too...I tested this morning!!':dohh:...I sure needed to hear you say youve been testing everyday for a pregnancy..Bc I really feel silly for lying to myself and testing. I told myself I was going to stick to that same plan of not telling hubby Bc I rather find out and be heartbroken rather then the both of us....so I'm not telling until I'm in 2nd trimester!! And for the nosey people who only talk to you to ask if you're expecting I'm just lying and saying no too or maybe I'm not sure Bc when I announced the last one and lost it all I could think about was all the ones who I have to tell that I'm miscarrying. Argghhh so this will definitely be the biggest secret from my husband that I will have to keep. But I get really big fast so my weight might give it away!


Well ladies AFM: 
I was feeling myself this morning Bc I was so bloated and had abdomen twinges and tightness so me being 11DPO. And cramp like feelings all of a sudden I felt I needed to test....

Welp...a BFN!! I too even held it up to the light like 5x hoping to see something...laid back down for 30 mins, took it out my "empty trash bin" :haha: and went bk to the light. Still nothing :cry::growlmad::wacko: I got sooo down!!

But Bc I usually ovulate around 12-13DPO I'm keeping hope. 
My first preg I tested around 10dpo and nothing and then waited 2 more days then a BFP. I'm hoping this is the case!!

Ladies FX FOR US ALL: Danny hope your days fly by!!
HPmum: Hope that BFP pop up on 24th!


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## nevergivingup

Sorry post was so long... And sorry for any misspellings or grammar errors I use my iPhone to post and autocorrect thinks it's smarter then me...and/or I'm usually typing too fast and never read back over it to make corrections


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## HPmum2B

Don't worry about the BFN, it really is early to be testing, I know some people get positives show up really early, but most have to wait. I know as I go on this next week, I will be convincing myself I am not pregnant, I think I do it to try and protect myself from the dissapointment.

I wont make it to the second trimester without telling hubby, because he would be really upset if I went for a scan without him, and I think they will scan me at about 8 weeks. But I am intending to wait for that scan... I do get quite sick normally, but he goes to work so early in the morning, and I am normally okay by the evening. Plus its summer holidays comming up, so I don't have to get up and out the house very early, so I should be able to hide it okay. My biggest problem is I am an awful secret keeper!! I am pleased to hear you are planning on keeping it a secret too!!


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## Mum2gremlin

Hey ladies i hope u dont mind me jumping in i see two ladies in here that had mc right around same date as mine. I have read ur posts and would like to join. I mc june 20 and dc june 21st. I bleed for about 12 days and we started as soon as my body felt up to it. I think the first time was beginning of july. We havent stopped but i havent been following ovulation either so i have no idea. I would like to think my body has since the mc. Its been 27 days since. I took pregnancy test on saturday and it was super faint. I have zero idea if my hcg is still going down. I took tests over the last 3 weeks and the line had gotten lighter. I just dont know what to think. I seem to be having tender breasts and uterus cramping\pains since yesterday. So i know my periods coming or im pregnant again. Im scared to test again and i have tests screaming my name. Uggh praying for rainbow sticky babies for all!


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## nevergivingup

Hi and welcome Mum2Gremlin!!

Sorry you have to be welcome under these conditions. It gets better though with time and acceptance.

I was so down Bc I had to get a dnc to where I realized it was a better option then waiting to m/c on my own Bc my body wouldn't let go which wouldn't caused more damage then good. 

So here we are...but with my first dnc I didn't wait either, I jumped right bk in the race right after I finished bleeding but it wasn't my time Bc I did get pregnant but ended up m/c. again (which was my body so don't think this will be your case). So luckily I m/c at 4wks naturally and then waited 1 cycle before trying again and Thankfully I got my son!! 

Everyone is different some people got pregnant right away after their dnc and ended up having a healthy baby! This may be your case but you just have to figure are you pregnant or not, that's the hard part of starting right away after an dnc, only time will tell or a doctor. Hopefully those test should get dark, if not and no show of AF then you might want to go to doctor to make sure you are and not just leftover hcg. Usually it'll take me about 3-4 wks after my dnc for my hcg to leave my body and AF to show then after AF has left I know the next cycle is ovulation. So fx for you that it's a new BFP!!!


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## Mum2gremlin

Thank you. Fx too! I understand why people wait. It was just too hard. Im sry to hear about ur experience fx for u too :) im gonna test tomorrow sometime. If i ovulated at thw lastest july 10th i would be at least 8 dpo. Either way i wanna see a darker line or no line at all. I would be happy at this point to just start my cycle. My breasts not so sure what all the tenderness. Mines. This last pregnancy and then my first it was the first and most dominate sign. Where are you with ur cycle?


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## Mum2gremlin

Thank you. Fx too! I understand why people wait. It was just too hard. Im sry to hear about ur experience fx for u too :) im gonna test tomorrow sometime. If i ovulated at thw lastest july 10th i would be at least 8 dpo. Either way i wanna see a darker line or no line at all. I would be happy at this point to just start my cycle. My breasts not so sure what all the tenderness. Mines. This last pregnancy and then my first it was the first and most dominate sign. Where are you with ur cycle?


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## nevergivingup

That's exactly how I felt when I jumped right bk into TTC after dnc. It was like, "am I or aren't I?! And I was. 
But Those faint test don't make it any better. Then the what ifs will start coming of m/c again.
But you have to let your body do its job, pregnant or still in m/c process it's going to do its job regardless. The tender boobs, sounds like a Great sign for you!!! Could possibly be a new pregnancy but if the hormone is still present in your body then you'll still have some of those symptoms unless it just popped up. 
AFM: I'm 13dpo at least I think I am :wacko: I'm timing from my ovulation stick but my symptoms are just now starting, I'm not sure anymore but based on my ovulation stick going bk faint on Thur. I said I should be 13dpo. But we will see, I'm testing on Wed. Hopefully I'll see 2 lines this time!


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## HPmum2B

Hi Mum2gremlin. Thanks for joining us (although sorry you are here too).

I had a medically managed miscarriage on the 20th June. And think I ovulated around the 10th also. So we could be on the same timings. At the moment I don't particulay feel that AF is due or I am pregnant, but I am offically planning on testing on the 24th. However, I poas this morning (BFN), because I just can't help myself.


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## nevergivingup

HPmum : it's only right too test all this waiting, right!! Give it more time for the hcg to get in your body good.

AFM: AF came in the middle of the night. So onto Cycle 3..argghhh! Really heartbroken Bc I really thought we had it. But knew these symptoms wasn't as obvious as previous pregnancies. I cried when I saw AF Bc I just don't know. But fx for all you ladies here. Fx


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## Mum2gremlin

nevergivingup: i am so sry when that happens to me i feel like a lost something. its such a bummer. fx for next cycle. 

hpmum: i couldnt help myself either i poas too and i got the slightest line i have no idea if its new or old.. gonna just keep testing till they get darker or till Af arrives. I feel as i always do pregnant or not i feel full in the uterus and tender breast.. going on day three. were still bding just in case these are ovulation pains LOL


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## HPmum2B

nevergivingup. I am so sorry to hear that. I think I will be devastated if/when AF arrives, so I can completely understand you being upset. but onwards and upwards hun, get your focus on next month. I always think about when the baby would be due, and if you fall next month, you will be into the better weather for when baby is due!!

Oh my goodness, mum2gremlin, I would think that is a new line, you shouldn't still have HCG in your system. Have you had a negative test since your MC?


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## Mum2gremlin

Hey! What a day. Worked my long 13 hr shift and all i could think about was the slightly positive this morning. Ekk i dont know what to think. I would think like u said theres no way hcg would still be lingering in my system. Today marks 28 days. I have taken tests almost every week since and they have become almost not there. I cant say i have had a negative. I used only one kind of test and its the ones we use in doctors office. I believe the hcg level is at least 50. Im gonna try to post a pic. I also took one 4 hrs ago with drinking water pee (lol not holding it) and i still see something. Its just crazy bc i mc on a full moon and now tonight's a full moon. Its a circle.


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## Mum2gremlin

Here are the pics.. Best i could get with camera.
 



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## HPmum2B

mum2gremlin, sounds very promising. Hopefully will get darker over the next few days,then you should know if itsa new pregnancy or not.

I am feeling pre-menstral, which is normal for pregnancy or period, so not sure yet. Still getting BFNs. Trying to talk myself out of it to ease the dissapointment. I do think the last few days of the tww are the worst... still no implantation bleed either, which is worrying me a bit.


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## sarah2211

If you ladies are at the stage yet, did your cycles go back to normal? Have you temped and gotten a rise? I'm worried my cycle is going to go a bit crazy and I'm not going to be able to try again for months until it's back to normal.


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## HPmum2B

I'm not 100% sure, I will be able to tell you in a couple of days I guess, when I either get AF or a BFP. I am pretty sure I ovulated around the 10th, which was 3 weeks after my MC.


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## Mum2gremlin

Hi ladies. So the full moon has spoken. Woke up this am with AF. Fudge. I hate that color. So on to thw next month. Looks like my levels never completely dropped before first cycle. I thought just maybe. But nope. Its okay im really happy i can get my normal cycle back and try next month. :) good luck ladies sticky beans.


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## Dannypop

Hello ladies!

I'm back! Sorry to hear everyone is back at square bloody one again. I think now we should all be ovulating around the same time so we can keep each other company!

And welcome Sarah. Sorry you have to join this particular group though :(

Went for blood test yesterday to check progesterone and my doc is gonna call me tomorrow with the results. Then he will be able to let me know when to come in and be scanned to see how ripe the dear old ovaries are!

I know, I am totally spoilt not having to worry about OPKs. But it still does nothing for the waiting!! Eeeeek. I have kept busy by working (I am a freelance Art Director for a magazine) otherwise booking loads of dinner dates with friends and watching awesome series. Oh and I guess my 2 little boys keep me quite distracted -that too!

Here's to hoping the weeks to O go by quickly for all of us. I think I should be Oing next week Fri/Sat. Imagine if we can all move to the 1st tri board together!

PS I don't know how you can keep a secret like that from hubby but that is so awesome and such a fab "present" to give him if you can.


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## sarah2211

I'm so sorry to those of you getting BFN/AF, I had hoped that you'd all get pregnant straight away :(

Do any of you temp? So far my temps are virtually identical to the same CD last cycle. OPKs have never worked for me. 

Thanks Danny for the welcome. It isn't where I hope and expected to be. I did post a few pages back too :)


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## Dannypop

Aaaah what an unexpectedly crappy piece of news -my estrogen has come back really low but besides that my doc says I am not immune to chicken pox so I've got to have the vaccination tomorrow which means I've got to put things on hold for a month! I am so frustrated. Feels like I am just treading water.

He wants me to go for a repeat blood test next week Wed and then he will let me know how my levels are just to see how my cycle is looking. DS2 is going to be 3 in October and I don't want more than a 3.5 year age gap.

Tick tock ...


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## HPmum2B

Sorry, that does sound a bit poo. Big hugs.
What does low oestrogen mean for ttc?
I know a month feels forever when ttc, but in the grand scheme of things, its not too bad.


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## HPmum2B

Argh... I am quite twingy now... feels a little bit like period cramps... I really hope its not. If AF arrives, I am going to be devastated. I feel like I realy need to be pregnant to move forward from my MC.
Sorry, I know I keep posting, don't feel you have to listen/read, I just think its better if I post my stress on here rather than pass it on to my husband.

Pregnant or Not Pregnant...


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## sarah2211

Awww Danny that sucks. My husband is in the army and he got sent overseas for 6 weeks and obviously missed my O back in March. It felt like a lifetime. And it was frustrating to go back to the waiting to try after you'd been waiting and trying so long already. I can empathize with you and hope it goes quickly. 

HP, of course you can post as much as you need to, don't need to be sorry. I'm feeling the same. I just need to get pregnant again as soon as possible now. I feel like that will be the thing that can help move on and forward. DH thinks we should be happy we know a swimmer can make it through. But after 9 months of trying and that is as far as we got, I can't find much to be happy about. FX and keep us posted.


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## Janisdkh

Hi ladies new here, suffered from multiple losses but my 3 Blighted Ovums just take the cake :( My last two were 2013 and just recently June 12th.. Still spotted lots and come July 10th I started what was like a period (heavier then spotting) and now here I am, finally bleeding free after all these weeks. My last day was July 19th and we have had sex daily since lol I am not sure if it as a period but it was def like one so here's hoping I am just a few days shy of my fertility window.. I am kind of crampy right now though. I decided to do a little charting on my bedding, cm, and when I think i might ovulate.. Exciting! <3 I hope to get to know you all <3 Good luck~

Ps. I have decided to chart kind of... Without temps and this is what I have so far
https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/Janisdkh


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## sarah2211

I'm sorry about your losses Janisdkh. I hope your cycles go back to normal soon and you can start trying again ASAP. 

I'm currently CD 18 and have EWCM. I usually O around CD22 so I'm wondering if I might even O earlier than usual since the loss. I'm wondering if anyone who had longish cycles, became more regular since their loss?


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## bumbleberry

Hi everyone, hope you don't mind if I join? Nearly over my 4th m/c, bleeding has nearly subsided after 3 weeks, and after being admitted to hospital a few days ago. 

We've agreed that we're going to start as soon as we can. So hoping my cycles go back to normal straight away. I'm temping and keeping my charts up to date. 

Hope we all get our sticky beans soon!


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## HPmum2B

Well I woke up saturday morning thinking I was out, because I had a bit of brown spotting and thought it was the start of AF. This then seemed to stop. Then the postman turned up with 2 FRERs, I decided to pee on one and got a very faint positive. This morning I peed on the other and got another very faint positive. Then about half an hour ago, I seemed to start bleeding again, my heart sank! Really looks like AF is here this time, so I guess I am out and very confused. :(


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## HPmum2B

Definitely out now, tests have turned negative and bleeding like full period. So I guess this is count day 2 as really the bleeding started yesterday, but was just very light.


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## sarah2211

HP, I'm sorry, it sounds like it may have been a chemical. I hope AF comes and goes quickly and you're able to start trying again soon.


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## bumbleberry

HPmum2B said:


> Definitely out now, tests have turned negative and bleeding like full period. So I guess this is count day 2 as really the bleeding started yesterday, but was just very light.

So sorry :hugs: hope AF passes quickly for you


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## HPmum2B

Not sure if anyone is still about on this thread... but I really don't know what to think. I am on day 4 of AF, for some reason, something wasn't sitting right with me, so I just decided to POAS, and I have got a faint (but stronger line) positive. What on earth is going on. So I may or may not be pregnant.
I know the sensible thing would be to phone the doctor, but to be honnest, I wouldn't want a scan before I am 6 weeks anyway, as I would like to see something, so I kind of want to see how things pan out as the week goes on.


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## sarah2211

I thought I'd O'd yesterday but my temp dipped again :( I feel I'm going to be one of those ones who aren't more fertile after a loss :( I thought being such an early loss I should be ok. (Don't believe FF crosshairs on CD14)


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## Dannypop

Oh girls I am so sorry for everyone's crappy news.

HP how blooming confusing -you must feel like a yo-yo from the emotions. What's the latest??

Welcome Janis -mine was also a blighted ovum. I can't imagine what 3 must do to your resolve. So sorry :(

Bumble welcome but sorry you find yourself here. Hopefully we can all be of support to one another as we go through the next few months.

Sarah I am in the exact same boat as you -and I even have my Gynae's proof to seal the disappointment. My blood tests revealed that my estrogen didn't rise so I didn't ovulate this month. I truly, truly thought I would be extra fertile after my MC (well, blighted ovum). 

Balls to this wait!! He says I should start AF soon. Got all the cramps but no witch yet. It was only last week that I was supposed to O but he says I should get AF this week. I just want her to arrive so that I can wipe the slate clean!!!!!!!


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## sarah2211

I'm sorry Danny. It sucks. Still no ovulation for me. I don't think it's going to happen this cycle. From what I read, those who MC early and naturally, usually just go back to their normal cycle. I had expectations that it would and that I could possibly be more fertile too. Why do they have to get our expectations up like that? :( 

I'm sorry you're going through this too. I hope AF arrives soon so you can start again. I'm not sure when it'll arrive for me and this is all making me feel really really annoyed (to say the least). I wish I'd never been pregnant last cycle! :(


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## HPmum2B

I just wanted to come back on here and update, so either I wasn't pregnant (and it was just left over hormone from my miscarriage giving me a positive pregnancy test) or I had a chemical. Either way, it wasn't to be last month.
I decided to take a break from the forum to try and stop myself obsessing. And decided to go for not trying not preventing. Although I did have some idea when I was due to ovulate, however, due to hubby working long hours and then me having tonsillitis, I think we only BD once or twice this month (which is very unusual for us).
Despite that, AF was due today and she has not arrived. I have taken a pregnancy test and it is positive. I have not told hubby though. :)


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## bumbleberry

Yay! Congratulations HPmum2B :happydance: that's fantastic news. Wishing you a happy and healthy nine months :hugs:


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## StillPraying

Hello ladies, i hope you dont mind me joining. I delivered my baby Luke at 15 weeks this past Sunday. He wasn't planned but now im anxious to try again. I know that sounds crazy, i cant replace him, but i know as one who has mc before that rainbow babies have a way of healing.


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## Dannypop

Congrats HP!!! How amazing. And the month when you weren't really even trying for it. Nice!

StillPraying that must have been absolutely the most heartbreaking thing to go through. I am so sorry. And yes having another baby will not erase your angel baby but will help ease the pain. Here's hoping your journey is a smooth and happy one to your BFP and healthy baby. 

AFM after an anovulatory cycle I am now 7DPO having had bloods confirm I ovulated this cycle. So am in the middle of the tww.


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## StillPraying

Dannypop thank you. Its nice to have people who understand. Tww, when do you plan on testing?


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## sarah2211

I'm so sorry to hear that Stillpraying. Do you think you'll take some time or start trying right away?

I had blood tests that said I didn't O last cycle and my other hormones aren't where they should be (prolactin, estrodial, LH and free androgen). My ultrasound also suggested it's PCOS related stuff. DH's SA was fine. So we are off to the FS on Thursday.


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## Dannypop

sarah2211 said:


> I'm so sorry to hear that Stillpraying. Do you think you'll take some time or start trying right away?
> 
> I had blood tests that said I didn't O last cycle and my other hormones aren't where they should be (prolactin, estrodial, LH and free androgen). My ultrasound also suggested it's PCOS related stuff. DH's SA was fine. So we are off to the FS on Thursday.

Aw I am so sorry. I can completely understand the frustration and upset when you dont manage to O. You feel like your body is rebelling and it just pushes you out another month and feels like the worst waste of time. I also had an anovulatory cycle after my MC and then bloods this month said I did manage to ovulate. Currently 8DPO. Sorry that it could be PCOS but at least they are getting on it and helping you. 

Stillpraying I will test next week We'd probably. AF due on Monday next week. What's the latest news?


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## StillPraying

Sarah I want to just start ttc. I think it'll take me a while anyways so I'd rather just get on the bus. What is FS? Sorry for the no O, that's so frustrating. 

Danny I'm excited for you to test. So you are waiting for AF to be late then or is it due the Monday after you plan to test?

AFM I think I finally stopped bleeding. I'm on day 9 post delivery. Thinking about doing opks to see if I even O this month?


----------



## Dannypop

StillPraying said:


> Sarah I want to just start ttc. I think it'll take me a while anyways so I'd rather just get on the bus. What is FS? Sorry for the no O, that's so frustrating.
> 
> Danny I'm excited for you to test. So you are waiting for AF to be late then or is it due the Monday after you plan to test?
> 
> AFM I think I finally stopped bleeding. I'm on day 9 post delivery. Thinking about doing opks to see if I even O this month?

Oh wonderful -as soon as the bleeding stops you can start moving on to the next stage. Press the reset button -but on your body only. One can never reset your heart and soul as your baby will always be held in that special space. 

Do the OPKs just for peace of mind. Good idea. 

AF due on Monday morning so I will test Tuesday if she's a no show. I really feel pregnant. I will be totally shocked if AF arrives. I will also officially not know my own body of these signs I am feeling all amount to nothing!:wacko:


----------



## StillPraying

OMG I don't know how you hold out so long! I'd have already POS at least 3 times!

AFM thought I was done bleeding, nope came back today with a vengeance. Ugh. Did see OB tho and all of my test results were normal which means whatever caused Luke's death was most likely chromosomal. Which is reassuring in the sense that it isn't likely to happen again and that him passing was for the best as something was probably wrong with him. :( trying to look on the bright side.


----------



## maryp0ppins

Hi all,
I had an early mc last cycle at 5weeks5days,bleeding lasted just over a week.
I think I may have ovulated 5-6 days ago but I am not certain as I haven't been doing opks this cycle.
I normally have a 32 day cycle and O around day 18, DH and I dtd on cd 16,17,18 and really hoping we've managed to catch again! Although i am completely aware that I may have a longer than usual cycle this month.


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## Dannypop

StillPraying said:


> OMG I don't know how you hold out so long! I'd have already POS at least 3 times!
> 
> AFM thought I was done bleeding, nope came back today with a vengeance. Ugh. Did see OB tho and all of my test results were normal which means whatever caused Luke's death was most likely chromosomal. Which is reassuring in the sense that it isn't likely to happen again and that him passing was for the best as something was probably wrong with him. :( trying to look on the bright side.

Oh what a relief. That is a bit of closure for you. Even when I had my MC at 6.5 weeks which barely anything, I was so relieved that it was diagnosed as a blighted ovum so I knew exactly what my body was doing. Your case is different as you actually had a little fetus growing but your body took control in its own way of handling things. Thank goodness it is unlikely to happen again. And once the bleeding is properly over it will be like a clean slate. 

Welcome Mary! Sounds like you covered your bases perfectly well. Any MC no matter even if it's a chemical or an early MC is still bloody hard cause you see the BFP and it opens up your heart and hopes. 
I had an anovulatory cycle after my MC but this is cycle 2 after my MC and I really think I caught the egg!! Keep us posted


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## StillPraying

Love your name Mary! Sorry for your loss :hugs: Do you have any idea when you *think* af will show?

Danny it does help knowing it wasn't something with me that needs to be addressed. I agree mc is hard no matter how early. Keeping my fx you caught the egg this cycle!


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## sarah2211

I thought I'd update. DH and I saw a fertility specialist earlier in the week. He thinks I'm ovulating very few cycles and I'm starting on Clomid next cycle. I'm currently taking provera to bring on AF. Obviously the MC I ovulated but the cycles since and some before, I haven't.


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## Dannypop

Clomid can work magic and can often be all it takes to get you preg. I took it for 2 cycles when ttc #1. It's so uninvasive. I was also only ovulating every now and then so it really was all it took for me. Oh plus I had the trigger shot just to make those ripe little Clomid eggs come out to play!


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## StillPraying

Sarah so glad you saw a specialist,really hope the clomid works quickly for you! 

Danny are you taking clomid this cycle too?


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## sarah2211

Thanks ladies. I'm feeling really positive about it happening for us!


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## StillPraying

Sarah when do you start clomid?


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## sarah2211

Currently take my provera to bring on AF. She should be here on the 11th September hopefully. Then I'll take clomid on CD3-7, 13th-18th September. The doctor said to treat CD11-18 as my fertile week. He also said not to temp, but I think I'll just during that week to confirm O and then towards the end of my TWW. I'm excited though, I wasn't to start now! Haha.


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## StillPraying

I'm so excited for you! Hopefully af shows up on time so you don't have to wait! Lol at temping anyways. Are you going to do opks?

My dh was like well we can start talking about trying after we move (mid oct) and you don't need to obsess over it. And I'm just nodding in agreement as I order a package of wondfo opks/hpts off of Amazon :blush: I'm not down for waiting. Lol


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## sarah2211

Thanks haha I'm so excited for me too. It almost feels like we are back at the start when we had the excitement of first trying. I'm actually beginning to picture it all happening, where as last month I could only imagine a childless future. 

Haha temping has become such a habit. I'll just do it to confirm O day and then to be able to become a total POAS addict haha. DH is ok with me temping those days and he said he won't dob me into the FS haha. I'm thinking about doing OPKs, mainly just so I can feel like I'm in control haha. But we will still BD just as much regardless. I've got a few left over but not enough for a whole cycle. 

Haha I don't blame you. Maybe if thinks you're not obsessing over it and let it happen he'll be ok if it does. Did you have a D&C? Have you been given the go ahead to start TTC straight away? Sorry I haven't read the whole thread


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## Dannypop

StillPraying said:


> Sarah so glad you saw a specialist,really hope the clomid works quickly for you!
> 
> Danny are you taking clomid this cycle too?

Nope not yet but it will be my Gynae's next step if I am not preg this month. And I am so scared of twins eeeeeeeek! Ha ha


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## maryp0ppins

StillPraying said:


> Love your name Mary! Sorry for your loss :hugs: Do you have any idea when you *think* af will show?
> 
> Danny it does help knowing it wasn't something with me that needs to be addressed. I agree mc is hard no matter how early. Keeping my fx you caught the egg this cycle!

The absolute earliest would be next weekend but I think most likely it will be the tues,sep 13.
I have a sore/dry throat and blocked nose so I am hoping its gone before AF shows (or not!) Because I am feeling really run down.
Seeing my gp tomorrow to talk about the miscarriage since I was on holiday when it happened, I want him to record it on my medical record.


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## StillPraying

Sarah no I was induced and delivered. My OB told me I could try as soon as I felt ready. Yay I'm so glad the excitement is coming back for you, that way it's fun and not as stressful hopefully. I'm definitely going to hide my stash from him and just obsess on here lol

Haha Danny I've heard clomid does make the twin thing higher. Do you have twins in your family?

Mary definitely want it in your medical record. I hope you aren't catching a cold!


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## Dannypop

StillPraying said:


> Sarah no I was induced and delivered. My OB told me I could try as soon as I felt ready. Yay I'm so glad the excitement is coming back for you, that way it's fun and not as stressful hopefully. I'm definitely going to hide my stash from him and just obsess on here lol
> 
> Haha Danny I've heard clomid does make the twin thing higher. Do you have twins in your family?
> 
> Mary definitely want it in your medical record. I hope you aren't catching a cold!

My husband was one of a twin but it got absorbed in utero but my cousin who is psychic says she can see a strong chance of twins for me eeeeek!!!!!


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## StillPraying

Oooooo! Do you want twins? I used to say I didn't want twins because the idea of being prego with twins terrifies me lol but now I think I'd really like twins.


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## sarah2211

Danny, twins would be DH's dream come true. I know what you mean though! It wouldn't be my choice but every baby is a blessing! 

Apparently it's a 1 in 10 chance of twins on Clomid and 1% of triplets. Triplets would scare me! 

Still praying, I'm glad you are able to make the choice when you're ready. After your third MC do the doctors know what might be causing them? Haha after replying to your last post I went and bought some OPKs online. I should get them before AF finishes haha. Here's to hiding our stash!


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## StillPraying

OMG I don't even consider triplets. No way. I can't even try to picture that! 

Sarah since they weren't consecutive losses they don't really do much digging. I got tested for everything after this last one because it was 2nd trimester, which isn't as common as 1st trimester losses.

My stash should be here tomorrow!!


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## sarah2211

Haha no way to triplets! I could handle twins but triplets would be too much I think. 

That's hard. I bet it doesn't make too much difference to you whether they were consecutive or not, still crap! Did they find anything this time? 

Haha you'll have to beat DH to the letterbox :)


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## Midnight_Fairy

I got pregnant straight after. Wasnt planned xx


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## StillPraying

Midnight fairy you never got af? 

Sarah all of my test results and the placenta testing all came back normal, which means it was probably chromosomal. I chose not to have an autopsy done on him.

I definitely don't think I could do triplets. Lol 

It'll probably get put on our porch so I keep peeking out the window lol


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## sarah2211

I understand why you didn't want to do an autopsy. Regardless it's still difficult but you're hopefully not dealing with something that's going to result in another MC. All signs point to another healthy pregnancy not far awayfor you. 

Haha no I'd go crazy with triplet Les. I said to DH last night that there's a 1% chance on triplets on Clomid and got so excited and said that would be the best! I reminded him it wouldn't be him carrying triplets plus he's in the army so he'd probably go and get himself deployed...! 

Haha DH will probably get to the letterbox before me but I'm not too fussed. He knows I'll do what I like to track my cycles haha.


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## StillPraying

My husband and I are both in the military, there's no way I could handle being prego with triplets while being in. No thanks. That's hilarious that he thought it'd be best. My DH said with our luck well have twin girls and he said he'd just leave and the judge would be on his side hahahahaha have

I keep having awful cramps and passing small dark stringy clots. It's awful.


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## Dannypop

I would simply go nuts if I am pregnant with twins even though I know it is a blessing. Still -I love one at a time thanks!! I have 2 boys so we all know that it will be twin boys!

Stillpraying sorry again for what you went through. But as Sarah says it sounds like a healthy pregnancy is around the corner for you. Once all the horrid clotty bleeding is over and your body is completely back at square 1 you will be super extra ready to go go go.

AF is 1 day late for me (I am never late but my first cycle after the MC was 5 weeks. My doc confirmed I ovulated on CD14 this cycle and that was 16 days ago) so I will go buy a test today and test tomorrow only because I want to use FMU. I feel pregnant!!!!


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## sarah2211

Stillpraying, you'll know all about the difficulties when deployment arises! DH has just started at a new unit and apparently it's the busiest unit in the army (just my luck). He's got lots of courses to do this year and next, so hopeful he won't be away too much. He's actually away today and my OPKs came in the mail! 

Haha that would be just your luck! 

I hope that passes for you quickly :(

Danny, I hope so. Do you know if there's any way to check (like with blood tests) to check whether it's going to be a sticky BFP? Like should I ask for an HCG and repeat 48 hours later? How exciting, FX your sticky BFP is here!


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## maryp0ppins

Fingers crossed for you dannypop!
Either my AF is on her way or I am pregnant,boobs are so sore if I put any pressure on them.
I should be able to test next Monday if she doesn't show.
They feel exactly like they did the week before I got my BFP last time.


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## Dannypop

Wow all you amazing army wives. Strong ladies indeed!!!

Sarah yes definitely the best thing to do to check that it is a sticky bean is to go for bloods. My Gynae sent me every few days for a week or so with DS1 as I was on Clomid and Trigger shot with him. The bloods will confirm that your HCG is rising at the rate it should and will check that your estrogen and progesterone levels are rising accordingly. So defo ask your doc to get your levels tested! As soon as I get my BFP (Hee Hee) the first thing I will do is call him to ask when I need to go for the bloods. 

Marypoppins eeeeek too exciting when you just have that sense that you are preg judging by your body behaving the same way as in the past. That sounds so promising!


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## sarah2211

Thanks so much Danny. It's funny, the country I live in doesn't really support the army as much as in other countries. So no one recognises army wives. When my husband deployed someone said to me, "do we even have an army?" 

I'll definitely be sure to go to the doctor and ask for those tests. How long did you/do you plan to get your HCG levels tested for and how frequently? 

I'm just feeling really impatient today


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## StillPraying

Danny did you test??

Mary so excited for you having same symptoms! Can't wait for you to test. 

Sarah what country are you from? I'm in the US and there's all kinds of stuff for military families if you're near a large base. And when are you gonna test? We need some lines on here!

AFM horrid pains yesterday and passed a quarter sized dark clot. Bleeding is still consistent though. *sigh* I'm on a mini vacation at the beach right now but so mad I'm still bleeding! If it's still consistent by Monday I'm going to call and ask my OB.


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## sarah2211

Danny please let us know when you test!

We live in New Zealand. There's virtually nothing for army families here. We do get cheap rent and 10% discount at a few places but nothing major. People actually seem to dislike the army here more than anything. 

Well I'm still taking Provera and I should get AF on the 11th, if she decides to come the day after I stop. So I won't start OPKs until about the 20th September. I'm getting so impatient. It feels like everyone can get pregnant except me :(


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## StillPraying

Sarah I feel the same way. I've gotten to the point where I avoid pregnant women that I know and the baby section of stores. Even seeing pregnancy tests make me want to cry. I'm so impatient to ttc and I yet I'm still bleeding uuugghhhh we can pity party together. :hug: 
I hope af shows up as she's supposed to so you can at least feel like you're moving forward!

That's strange they don't like the military there...if it makes you feel better the military wives here despise female service members so I get the hate a lot lol


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## sarah2211

It's so hard. I'm a teacher and we've got 5 pregnant mothers of children in my class. It's hard, I want to be happy for them, but it's not easy. A few weeks ago a mother picked up her daughter while she was having contractions. I'm not sure what it's like TTC 2+ but when you're childless it feels really really hard. I'm hoping it's just 4 more days until AF will be here and then I'll be able to start Clomid 


It is strange, but recently there have been lots of negative stories in the media about drug using and other trouble making. Plus the government have decided to extend a deployment to Iraq, which lots of people in the public disagree with. So the army cop it. I bet, I use to work in a school in a military community and the army wives didn't like the wives who were in uniform. 

I hope AF arrives soon for you!


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## Dannypop

Aw stillpraying sorry you are still having uncomfy bleeding and all the rest. Wishing you the speediest of recoveries.

Sarah huge hugs -it really is so soul-crushingly sad when you feel like your body is going against what you want it to do. I have such a strong belief that the little soul who is going to be in your life is right there waiting but they have to be born at the exact right time for their life. It is on their time. I know that doesn't help when you are in the thick of it but just know that it's all lining up as it should xxx

AFM I got my BFP yesterday! I am so excited but also just waiting for the blood tests to confirm that the levels are all rising. I think I will be sent every 2-3 days for about 10 days. And then at 7 week we get our first transvaginal scan 

I am feeling much more tired than last time so hopefully this is a sticky one. And I will be checking in on you girls to see how things are going. All the baby dust in the universe sprinkling your way


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## StillPraying

Congrats Danny! Keeping everything crossed for you that it sticks. Keep us posted! 

Sarah :hugs: I'm not sure which is harder when ttc. I think either way just plain sucks. To me I feel like my body has just stopped being able to carry babies so it's like hit or miss is it gonna stick. I look at my girls and I'm like....what did I do wrong?
let's be positive. They've done studies showing that positivity actually helps! Just count down to AF now!


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## Gypsy1106

We did not wait after 7.5wks MC in mid August and am currently 3wks5days pregnant. We were not trying and not preventing. History of MCs with low progesterone and anovulatory cycles until months of Vitex and vitamins mixture. Old crappy OB prescribed me progesterone oral supplements and has not informed me how to take them and we fell pregnant by accident really this cycle. So the scrambling has begun to find an OB to get started on progesterone properly and hoping it isn't too late for this bean. Good luck to all!


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## Dannypop

Thanks Stillpraying -yup it feels so weird when you suddenly have troubles after having 2 other kids and now all this hassle ...

Gypsy welcome! Sounds like you did the right thing to just forge ahead. Congrats on your BFP! I was booked in for another follicle scan for the end of next week if I didn't get a BFP this cycle and I was dreading doing the whole debacle of timing and measuring and blood-testing and prodding again. And this is just at the beginning of a short ttc journey (6 cycles!) What so many other women have to go through breaks my heart.


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## StillPraying

Gypsy hope you can find an ob soon!


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## Gypsy1106

Oh dear what a mess. I called new OB- I made an appt with them during last MC- that's scheduled for sept 20th- so I called them today to see if I could get in sooner just to have levels taken etc. The doctor asked again for me to confirm my MC dates, and then was completely and utterly perplexed how I could've gotten pregnant again so quickly and insinuated that I may actually still be miscarrying from August- mind you, the miscarriage was medically confirmed over, and I followed my levels back down. I ovulated and wound up pregnant again, and apparently that happens alllll the time, how is that so perplexing to an OB!? So she suggested I wait. So now, I'm back at square one. I called my old crappy OB and he is faxing prescription for bloodwork so I can get it taken tonight- which I am grateful for but petrified to get stuck with him again. The other OBs in my area/network basically refuse to see anyone sooner than 8 weeks, and one other one who would see me sooner got god awful reviews by every woman who's ever gone there pretty much. Eye roll to the extreme.


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## maryp0ppins

Caved and took a walmart cheapie test just after 10pm, second line! Thankfully I had saved my wee in a pot and then tried a FRER and the second line appeared before the wee had finished going accross! I can NOT believe it.


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## StillPraying

Mary congrats!!! 

Gypsy so sorry you didn't get a different ob. But maybe this one will at least help you get what you need!


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## Dannypop

Gypsy that is crazy. That must make you so worried now and possibly for nothing. It's like they were trying to cut you down to size. Not nice, so sorry. Keep us posted what happens


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## Gypsy1106

well ladies, at approximately 3wks6days pregnant, I have a progesterone level of 23.7, which is a far cry from my 3.7 @7.5wks last time! And an HCG of 78. Hoping that number keeps on doubling and I cannot wait to be covered in bruises now! Waiting for crappy OB to call me back and tell him he'll be giving me blood work weekly until I say so lol. 

I'm so so relieved but will not shake this utter fear until there's a baby in our arms. I so hope for all of us to have that! 

I feel like I need to fax this to what would've been new ob to teach them that it's possible to get pregnant right after a miscarriage lol.


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## StillPraying

You definitely should call and tell them. I would not appreciate being written off like that! What kind of practice has Dr's that don't know you can get PG right after mc?? Idiots. Even if he's a crappie ob, at least you are getting what you need from him and I'm sure he'll comply with testing your levels! Fx it's a sticky bean. I know how you feel not feeling safe.


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## Gypsy1106

It's pretty common knowledge it looks like on here but OBs seem to be behind. Even crappy OB asked " are you sure you're pregnant?" I'm like umm, do sticks and HCG levels lie typically? I feel pregnant and I've been getting positives when peeing on everything. He's concerned about HCG level being low, but at not even 4 weeks pregnant yet I'd think it's still ok as long as it increases right!? So he's faxing in another HCG and progesterone prescription to lab for early next week. Positive vibes here.


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## StillPraying

Pregnant is pregnant and hcg levels range greatly from woman to woman. So right now you're pregnant, enjoy it! Just focus on being as healthy as you can and stay positive! Are you going to do a digi?


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## Gypsy1106

I've done 2 digis with the week counter. One on Tuesday afternoon with "pregnant 1-2 weeks", then again this morning "pregnant 2-3" weeks making me 4-5 weeks.
So I'm assuming my levels are reading more at the lowest range of 4 weeks considering where I'm at since my miscarriage and the possible ovulation date.


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## StillPraying

But that in itself shows progression! :yay:


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## Gypsy1106

I so hope so! I did take the first digi after lots of water and peeing though so I'm not completely confident it shows all progression but I'll take it!


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## StillPraying

When do you go back for more betas?


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## Gypsy1106

It's looking like early next week. We're going away on Friday of next week just for a long weekend, and my work week is gonna be hellish so I'm gonna call Monday to make sure he faxes it over to lab.


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## Dannypop

Crappy Ob needs to keep testing you and not make you feel so worried. Come on over to the Mid-May thread -you're ready for us!


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## Gypsy1106

I'm not sure I'm ready to commit yet to other boards lol. Im so overly nervous about losing this one too!! I so wish I could fast forward 5 months lol. Pregnancy is supposed to be all happy and positive. I'm over here peeing on sticks like they're going out of style just to make sure there's a second line still, my SO is yelling at me to quit spending money lol, and I'm checking with a darn magnifying glass everytime I wipe for any type of red lol. And don't even get me started on the boob hurting check I've been doing lol. This is a beautiful disaster so far! Will join you guys possibly after one (or 6) more blood tests lol


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## Dannypop

Absolutely, completely and utterly fair enough. We will be waiting for you with (virtual) (alcohol-free) champagne!


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## Gagrlinpitt

August 5 I had a cp at 4w6d.. I tested this morning and swore I saw a faint line but Im going to wait until Saturday and test again..


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## Gypsy1106

Oh dear I hope it's your BFP !! As soon as I saw the slightest maybe positive I was peeing on everything lol. Good luck and keep us updated!


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## Gagrlinpitt

Gypsy1106 said:


> Oh dear I hope it's your BFP !! As soon as I saw the slightest maybe positive I was peeing on everything lol. Good luck and keep us updated!

In some ways I'm too scared to test again lol.. Here is my test from this morning.
 



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## StillPraying

Gagrlin I see what you're seeing! Eeeeeee can't wait for you to test tomorrow!


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## Gagrlinpitt

So I'm not completely crazy..


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## StillPraying

No not completely :wink:


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## sarah2211

I see it on the reverse image and I'm just on my phone. FX for you :)


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## Gagrlinpitt

Thanks Sarah.. I honestly would be ok with things either way I just want out of limbo. I'm 7 days late for AF and no sign of it...


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## Gypsy1106

Oh my goodness I can't wait till you test today! we're all a little crazy but I totally think I see it too!


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## Gagrlinpitt

Another view of it
 



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## sarah2211

Thanks ladies. I feel terrible thinking the things I do. But when I see anything to do with people trying beyond their first baby, I just have to take a deep breath. I've been hiding out in the TTC#1 board a lot because it's so much easier. I just want 1, it's just hard to see others talk about their 3rd, 4th, 5th. I hope you understand and don't think I'm being horrible. 


Garg, maybe it's time to see a doctor for a blood test. To be honest, I would have expected a darker line if you were that late, but you do heard stories of women who don't get their BFP until they are weeks and weeks late.


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## StillPraying

Gagrlin could be that you are earlier tho since mc can mess up your cycles.

Sarah I don't think that's awful at all. I find it harder to be on the boards with those who haven't had a loss, it's an emotional thing. You can't help how you feel. You gotta go wherever helps you.


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## Gagrlinpitt

I'm thinking AF is on her way.. Which im honestly not upset about.. It'll get me out of limbo.


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## sarah2211

Thanks. It is just the most frustrating things I've ever had to deal with. You spend all your life thinking that pregnancy will just happen at the drop of a hat and you need to do everything you can to prevent pregnancy. But then when the time comes and tou want to get pregnant (after being in a committed relationship for many years, but wanting to wait until the time is right) it doesn't happen. And no amount of money or anything can guarantee that this will end positively for you. And there's no timeline. If I knew in the next 2 years we'd have our baby in our arms, I could let go. But there's no way of knowing. We could spend years, thousands of dollars and still be childless at the end, while watching everyone else get their babies and not even be grateful for it. Honestly, that is the one thing I couldn't deal with in my life. 

DH's brother and SIL have dealt with infertility and were meant to be coming today to visit and we were going to go to an army family day together. They just text back saying they can't make it but hope we have fun at the family day without any family... Wow.


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## WishnandHopn

Oh Sarah you sure said it...I feel exactly the same way. I wish I could look into the future and know that we will have at least one child. I don't even need the crystal ball to tell me when it's going to happen...just IF we will ever have our baby. It would make it so much easier to keep going and keep hoping.


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## Gagrlinpitt

AF made her appearance and my dh admitted he was a little disappointed.. In think my heart sank a little... Back to charting and temping.. I'm going to do everything in my power to make this month our month...


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## MissYogi

Hi ladies, can I join you? 

I've just had an early loss at just 5+3 but nonetheless it has been very heartbreaking. I actually haven't even been fully confirmed yet, I still need to get my second blood test to check that my hcg level are dropping and then I'll know for sure on Monday. Although I already know it's gone. I feel sort of terrible for thinking of trying again so quickly but it's what I need to do in order to move on. We will start going for every other day once I stop bleeding and just keep our fingers crossed we get our rainbow baby soon!


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## sarah2211

Wishnhopn, that's exactly it. If we could look into that crystal ball and just know it'll happen for us I could take a deep breath and let go and let it happen. DH and I had a big talk this afternoon and he got really annoyed with me saying that we couldn't guarantee we will end up with a baby. He got really annoyed with me for saying that, but it's true. Not everyone who wants a baby gets one. Nothing is 100%. 

Gagrlinpitt, I'm sorry :( I was so hopeful for you. Don't be too hard on yourself, there's so little we can actually do to make it happen. I'm sure you did all you could. 

Welcome Missyogi. I'm so sorry for your loss. I remember it took me about 5-6 days to have it confirmed but like you, I knew it was over. We wanted to start again asap and after 2 weeks we did. FX you'll be one of the lucky ones who gets their BFP straight away. 

Afm, I think I'm just feeling emotional thanks to the provera. I hope AF shows her face soon. Tonight's my last tablet.


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## Gagrlinpitt

Sarah I think both dh and I were hoping our rainbow baby would come right after the loss.. I think that both hit us pretty hard.


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## sarah2211

Gagrlinpitt, I was the same last cycle. After reading about this increased fertility, we got our hopes up. When it was a BFN, it made it even tougher. That's the dumb thing, you want to be hopeful and positive but when the odds are never in your favour and based on all the other months, it's hard. If you want to PM, feel free to send me a message :)


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## StillPraying

Ladies don't be so down on yourselves! Positive thinking goes a long way and they've even done studies proving that it helps! I know it's hard to keep your heads up, but in the end when you DO get your rainbow babies, and I have full faith we all will, we will look back and say it was worth it. You're right sarah, it isn't 100% guaranteed, but then, nothing in life is. Don't live your life focusing on what may or may never happen. Life is much too short to be so hard on yourself. I truly believe we will all overcome this, and I'm so thankful to have such awesome women to get through this with!

Missyogi welcome :flower: so sorry for your loss. Mc is hard no matter what stage.


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## MissYogi

Still praying, I love your perspective and I think you are absolutely right, it will definitely happen for all of us. 

I just had a friend call who knew we were going to be trying but she doesnt knew about the MC and she was asking how I was doing which was really hard to hold it together through but then she says "so no baby yet" and then I just lost it and started crying. I know she doesn't realize the issues with asking that because she's never been even close to this situation but I thought it was just really insensitive. I mean, even if I had good news then I wouldn't want to be forced into announcing it like that. There's really just no good that can come of asking a friend that before they bring it up themselves.


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## StillPraying

Missyogi :hugs: I've had so many people say such insensitive things like that it's obnoxious. People who have not been through losses or ever had to actually ttc have no clue how hard it is.


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## WishnandHopn

MissYogi, I'm sorry you're going through this. It's definitely tough, so many things would set me off crying in the first couple of weeks after my loss. People can really be insensitive with their questions and comments, even if they mean well. 

Just this week someone at work I hadn't seen in over a year patted her own tummy and whispered 'are you pregnant?'. I almost lost it. I told her no, I'm just fat. Ugh, hate those questions!


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## StillPraying

Wish I'm so sorry. I hate comments like that. Our birthday ball is coming soon and one of my Marines told me, "we'll at least now you can drink at the ball".....no that does not make me feel better about losing a baby.


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## MissYogi

I honestly think they all mean well and are just trying to be nice but don't know what else to say. My friend who asked on the phone is such a kind person and she knows how badly I want a baby and she is a good friend who I would likely tell pretty early anyways. But she has never wanted kids and just doesn't know the aching feeling when you can't have a baby that you want so badly so she doesn't understand how painful it can be to talk about. I'm sure she feels really badly for having asked now that she knows because I just broke down and told her what was going on. Then she was so kind and offered to bring me food and I just wanted to scream "I don't want to eat I just want my baby!"


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## StillPraying

Missyogi so true, people do mean well and I agree it's hard not to scream. It does get better with time and soon we will all be analyzing pink lines and celebrating bfps!!!


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## sarah2211

AF arrived! Yay :)


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## Gypsy1106

Our losses often go unnoticed or are downplayed significantly and there's no real way anyone can understand the depth of sadness that accompanies the loss of what would've been. However, positivity is so so important. Our bodies CAN do this. And they WILL. We are equipped to create life and part of that is staying physically emotionally and mentally in that fight. When I had my last loss, I was so so down on myself and felt invalid and broken, in all senses of the word. My SO reminded me to be nice to myself. I had a loss (again) but I was not a lost cause and we're still in this. Ladies- be nice to yourselves, especially cause most people suck and have zero clue how to talk to someone who's experienced what we have. 
I'm back in the game again and am around 4wks3days immediately after a loss and I feel afraid for everything most of the time. But today, I'm trying to give myself some credit here. This could be the time it sticks- or not. However, my (and your) track record for getting through difficult scary things is 100% and there's something to be said for that for all of us. We are a strong bunch and we can't ignore that fact. I'm going to choose to focus on that today.


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## Gagrlinpitt

Gypsy that's so true.. Positivity is so important.

Sarah that's wonderful.. Now you can get back on track.


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## MissYogi

I love that you said that our track record for getting through difficult scary things is 100%. I really need to remember that today.


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## WishnandHopn

Gypsy, thanks for that post. I really hope this one sticks for you!

Sarah, that's great, now you can have a fresh start. When do you start the clomid?

Yogi, huge hugs to you.

I'm CD6 and going for my baseline ultrasound this afternoon...wondering if they will actually tell me what they're seeing or if I will have to wait until my followup appt in a few weeks.


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## StillPraying

Sarah only here do we say yay for AF lol glad you're moving forward!

Gypsy keeping my fx for you that it's your sticky one this time.

Wish I hope you get some answers and insight!


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## WishnandHopn

I just had my scan...she counted 15 follicles total. So of course I'm googling like a maniac to find out if that is good for my age (37). It seems to be okay!


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## Jenny Bean

This is a great post!
I am so happy I found you guys.
I had a loss back in May at 10 weeks.
I chose to wait a few cycles before I tried again and I am ready now.
I will be trying in a few weeks as my period is just finishing up.
It looks like a few of you here have successfully gotten pregnant pretty quick after a loss so I am thinking there is hope for me :happydance:

Do you all recommend ovulation sticks or just try and trust your body?

TIA


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## sarah2211

Haha only here we can be excited AF is here. It's a really light AF so I'm struggling to know when to count CD 1. I'm meant to start Clomid on CD3 so I'm not really sure. I had a light AF yesterday and today isn't much heavier. So maybe I'll count yesterday as CD1 or maybe today? I'm meant to take Clomid CD3-7 but I guess 4-8 is still ok today.


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## MissYogi

I would say as long as it was enough to need a pad and came before 5 in the afternoon then you can count yesterday as cd1


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## StillPraying

Welcome Jenny! Sorry for your loss :hugs: welcome back to the land of ttc! I decided to start using opks because I'm a little lost on my cycle. However, if you know your body really well you could try that route before adding opks. I just have the cheap wondfos.

Sarah I agree with missyogi, if it's enough for a pad, count it. I've read of a lot of women saying their AFs post mc were either super heavy or super light so I think it's just your body trying to get back on track.


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## sarah2211

I'm not sure if it's enough for a pad. I've been using tampons, but probably should just use a pad instead. It's in the middle between spotting and light AF.. Frustrating :(


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## Gagrlinpitt

Sarah that's so frustrating. 

This AF for me was one of the worst I've had in a long time.. Cramps were pretty rough the first two days and bleeding was very heavy.. Apparently that's normal for first post mc AF.. I'm just happy it's almost over and we can begin ttc again..


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## StillPraying

Sarah have you called your Dr to ask about taking the clomid with super light af?

Gagrlin sorry the :witch: has been so awful


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## MissYogi

I'm trying to figure out what to expect about ovulation after mc. I am hoping that I still ovulate on day 17 like before but I'm not really sure what to call day 1. First full day of actual bleeding or the day before which is when mc likely started? And can I even assume my cycle will be the same or will it be totally random?


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## StillPraying

Missyogi everything I've read says count first day of bleeding as cycle day one. For some reason I've read a lot of women saying that their o was earlier or later. Maybe do OPK to see?


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## WishnandHopn

I would agree, you count the first day of actual bleeding (not spotting) as CD1. In my case, my OPKs turned positive on CD18&19, so I O'd about one week later than usual. My first cycle was 34 days, it's usually 27-28.


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## MissYogi

Thanks ladies! I think we'll just start bding every other day right now, just in case it comes early.


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## StillPraying

Missyogi smart plan!


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## sarah2211

I rung the nurse and they ordered some blood tests to check what's going on. I guess the tests will tell them if it is AF or not. I'm hoping to find out tomorrow. Feeling really stressed about it all :(


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## Gagrlinpitt

Sarah I'll be praying for you. Hopefully this is AF and you'll be back to normal in no time.


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## StillPraying

Try to relax Sarah, you'll have an answer soon! I'm glad your doc is being so helpful! Hopefully you'll be taking clomid soon!


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## sarah2211

Thanks ladies. I hope I find out today what I'm meant to be doing. 

Has the bleeding and pain slowed down Stillpraying?


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## StillPraying

Let us know how it goes!

Sarah it's stopped, I just have random spotting every now and then. I got a positive opk 2 days ago tho so I'm hoping I ovulated :flow:


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## sarah2211

I got the go ahead to start Clomid tonight! 

That's sounding positive! FX!!


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## StillPraying

Sarah :happydance: yaaaay!!! So excited for you!!! Have you taken it before?


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## sarah2211

Nope never so I'm a little freaked out about the possible side effects. My husband made me repeat: "I Sarah-promise not to-become a Clomid Monster" haha. He's hopeful for twins


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## sarah2211

Twins or triplets and then get deployed he said!


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## Gagrlinpitt

Good luck Sarah.. I'm praying for you. 

Still- I hope you ovulated as well!!

Had my post mc follow up yesterday. I'm so thankful for this doctor...Even though I was still on my cycle he did and cervix check and internal and said everything looks good (I dunno how you see anything in there). He told me that when I get my next positive to call the office and speak to him directly and he will have me come in and do beta's and progesterone and then at six weeks he is going to have me do a viability ultrasound as well. Since I deal with some major anxiety he wants to do whatever he can to keep my anxiety and stress low as it's not good for the baby.

I'm going to keep charting and use opks and take my temperature (when I remember to).


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## StillPraying

Sarah :rofl: "enjoy being prego with triplets babe, see ya when you get back!" Bwahahahahahhaa. Rude. Lol well you would have us to vent to :thumbup: lately I've been thinking I would LOVE twin boys...hm... well hopefully you only have to do clomid once fx fx!

Gagrlin your Dr sounds lovely! So glad you'll be able to go directly to him :flower:


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## WishnandHopn

Good luck with the clomid Sarah! I hope it does the trick for you! I've heard lots of good stories of clomid success within a couple of cycles!


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## Gagrlinpitt

Still he is awesome.. He really cares about woman and you can tell that.


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## StillPraying

Gagrlin that's so amazing to find in a Dr, especially when. Ttc or being prego. I'm so glad you got someone who has your best interests at heart :hugs:


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## Gagrlinpitt

Thanks.. I totally would recommend him to anyone in the Pittsburgh area.


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## StillPraying

I really liked my Dr I had with Luke until I lost him. She was also pregnant, a few weeks ahead of me and I think the fact that I lost him just made her uncomfortable around me. Not that I blame her at all for feeling that way.


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## Gagrlinpitt

StillPraying said:


> I really liked my Dr I had with Luke until I lost him. She was also pregnant, a few weeks ahead of me and I think the fact that I lost him just made her uncomfortable around me. Not that I blame her at all for feeling that way.

I can understand that... I'm just praying that we get at least one forever baby...


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## sarah2211

Sounds like you've got a good plan and that everything is as it should be. FX it won't be long until you're back there with a BFP. That sounds like your doctor is being very thorough and considerate, trying to reduce the stress and worry. 

Next time I'm going straight in for beta and progesterone tests. I might plead the anxiety plus Lupus/PCOS card and try to get an early scan. I know I will be having scans every 4 weeks but I think they said from 8weeks on.


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## StillPraying

Gagrlin I'm praying for you :hugs: I can't wait for you to have your rainbow!

Sarah play every card you need to get what you need. 8 weeks is so they can confirm heartbeat, if you get a scan before that you can end up with an inconclusive scan which is extremely stressful,so just keep that in mind if you do get a super early one.


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## WishnandHopn

I don't think they really like to do early scans here unless you don't know when your last period was. Aside from doing a blood test to confirm, doctors here generally don't even do a first prenatal appt until 11 weeks. Midwives are a bit better, they will do first appts at 7 or 8 weeks.


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## StillPraying

I'm seen in a military hospital, you get an appointment around 6ish weeks to fill out paperwork and get a speech about being healthy, and go over your history. They usually do scans at 11 weeks so they can confirm growth/heartbeat/due date.


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## sarah2211

That's a good point. When I had my scan following the loss they said they wouldn't have seen anything until I was about 6.5-7 weeks anyway. So maybe I'll just opt for the blood test. 

Here, dependants have to see regular doctors and there's not insurance or special treatment. DH can obviously see the military doctors but he's never sick. 

I think here you can see your midwife from 8 weeks.


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## Gagrlinpitt

Yeah you usually won't see anything until 6 weeks... My doctor usually doesn't even have someone come in until 8-10 weeks


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## StillPraying

I'm terrified of ultrasounds now:nope: just the idea of going in makes me sick to my stomach. I definitely want it around 10/11, an inconclusive scan would destroy me.

I'm not a dependent, I'm active duty, and so have to get referred to the naval hospital through our regular docs. With ours both dependents and service members go to the military hospital which has both civilians and sailors working there.


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## Gagrlinpitt

Still- thank you for your service!


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## Jenny Bean

Do any of you think that BF is linked to miscarriage?


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## sarah2211

That makes sense. I can understand why they make you feel nervous. I wouldn't want to go for one too early and for it to cause more anxiety. I know I'm considered 'high risk' so I'm sure they'll follow all the steps they need to. 

Oh yes I know you're not a dependant. But I know in the states that dependants get to see the military doctors. Here, we get nothing.


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## StillPraying

Oh I see Sarah, that's so strange. Do they not have enough military Dr's to see both? I know we have bases that that is the case and so dependents see civilian drs. Do you get medical insurance through the military at least?

Jenny no I do not think breastfeeding is linked to mc. I read a TON on it when first trying for #2. I actually couldn't get pregnant while breastfeeding. I got pregnant the month after I stopped nursing, and that ended in mc.


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## sarah2211

They use to cover dependants but I guess its financial. They don't really seem to care about dependants, even though they make out like they do. No medical insurance, but it's not necessary here. 

Still feeling normal on Clomid.


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## StillPraying

Sarah wow i had no idea military and their families were treated so differently! So strange. Im glad its not necessary for them to cover you medically, that would be stressful! Here in the states it seems like there is no gray line, civilians either love us or despise us, its weird.

Yay glad you haven't had any super negative side effects! Hope it stays that way!


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## sarah2211

We have a public health system here. It's not fantastic, but it's enough. 


The army here are even trying to sell off all their houses and expect people to rent in the public market..


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## StillPraying

Oh wow so they really don't support families at all, that's so sad.


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## sarah2211

Yup really sad. 

How are you getting on Stillpraying?


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## StillPraying

Yesterday was 4 weeks from my loss and my hpt is still positive. So now I'm not sure if the opk was right and I actually O'D or not.


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## sarah2211

Wow that's a really long time. Have you checked in with the doctor about it? Do you get another U/S or any follow up? 

Last Clomid last night and spotting is finally finishing up. I'm CD10 today. I started back temping this morning, but of course had a rubbish night's sleep. I'll start OPKs in the next few days. DH is away but should be home tomorrow to get started on the BDing.


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## StillPraying

Woohoo glad you've got your round of clomid in!

I have my 6 week follow up the first week of October


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## sarah2211

I'm feeling really hopeful but so scared of being disappointed. 

I bet that couldn't come soon enough!


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## StillPraying

I'm the same way. Like I can't help that my hopes are up but trying to bring them down.


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## sarah2211

It's really dangerous. I feel like it's going to hurt so much more if it's a BFN.


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## StillPraying

Are you going to test early? Im 10dpo today but i cant believe my positives because of mc....


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## Jenny Bean

Wow stillpraying, I can't believe you are still getting positives!!
That must be frustrating....But I am secretly hoping its a true positive for you!!


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## Gypsy1106

Been getting pos HPTs since 10dpo! Still in the game at 5weeks and 5 days today. Congratulations, still!! Sticky babies all around.


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## Gypsy1106

Oh wait I just read that it might not actually be. I so hope that it is for you! My first pos HPT- this new pregnancy, occurred about 4 weeks since the start of my mc. I so hope it's the same for you.


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## StillPraying

Thanks gypsy i hope so too but I never got a bfn other than the cheapies the other day so idk what to think.


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