# I'm finally a mummy =] after 11 years of trying <3 So happy =D



## Little_Nugget

Sooo this is probably one of the latest birth stories ever lol but things have been so hectic here. This is my birth story. Introducing baby Erin =]

I had my c-section on January 10th at 34 weeks exactly. I arrived at the hospital at 8am and the doctors came to see me immediately. I was hoping out of the 4 women on the ward (including me) that I'd be the last in surgery as I was TERRIFIED, but Noooo I was going first. Eeeeee lol.*

A doctor came to fit my catheter and put on those gorgeous stockings while the doctor who was doing the c-section introduced herself and went through what would be happening. She was a really nice Scandinavian lady =] I looked very sexy in my overly tight stockings and backless gown as I walked down to theatre haha. *My consultant was down there which was nice. She had been my caregiver through two previous losses so to have her there helping to deliver my little one was great.

My mum came in with me and looked hilarious in her scrubs lol. There were 5 neonatal doctors there in case lo was having problems, my consultant and the Scandinavian doctor and two anaesthatologists. Quite a lot I thought.*

I opted for a spinal rather than epidural cos I was terrified after seeing my mum get an epidural. It looked horrific.*

After the numbing injection, the spinal was administered and within seconds my whole lower half went very hot and tingly and after a few checks by the doctors I was numb. It was the most bizarre sensation!!*

I was very nervous but they were talking to me and I started to relax so they began the opp. I don't remember feeling anything. I could barely feel them even touching me I was that numb and tingly lol. They started the first cut at 9:23am and at 9:31am my little girl was held up above the screen =D I burst into tears but I was so happy. They'd said just before she was out that she may not cry but she was screaming haha. The neonatal doctors gave her checks and then my daughter was wrapped up and given to me to hold while I was stitched up. She weighed 5lbs 3oz and was 18 inches long. My consultant then joked and asked if she should tie my tubes before they closed me up as she didn't think she could go through such another emotional pregnancy with me lol

I came over all queer though and started to shake uncontrollably and a wave of sickness hit me so mum took her as a sick bowl was stuck under my face and I was injected with something to try and make me feel better. It didn't work and I threw up so they have me something else which eventually started to work. I felt absolutely awful and was still shaking like crazy.*

After the doctors had stitched me up my consultant had a cuddle and she looked so happy. It was a big event for her as much as us as without her help and intervention I still don't think I'd be a mummy =]

She congratulated me and I was wheeled to recovery while my mum held lo. Once there the doctor who fitted my stockings tried to help me get her to breast feed but she was too tired and small so the doctor hand expressed me into a small syringe while my mum dressed lo.*

The doctor noticed lo was sounding funny with her breathing so a neonatal doctor came to look at her and made the decision to take her to the nicu =[*

She was kept down there and was in an incubator on cpap as her breathing was quite rattly and squeaky. She spent 9 hours on cpap And was then able to be kept off it as she was breathing ok. However, the post natal ward wouldn't allow her up to the ward as she was less than 35 weeks so I was taken up there alone which was bloody horrible especially as I couldn't get out of bed to go and see her =[ my mum stayed with her though and came up to me an hour later.

Due to her age and size breast feeding proved problematic so she was put on a feeding tube and as I wanted to bf I was given an electric pump so I could express.*

The post natal/nicu nurses nicknamed me Daisy because within hours of her birth I was expressing around 400mls every 4-5 hours which they said was amazing lol

The next morning I was told to get out of bed. I was freaking shitting my pants. I was in agony and honestly thought if I moved I'd split open. Two midwives came and took an arm each and helped me sit up and then slowly turned me so my legs were over the side of the bed and then they lifted me up. If noone else had been on the ward I would have screamed my head off as that's how much it hurt. I just wanted to cry and hug my tummy. When I looked at the bed it was covered in blood =O it was horrific. They slowly walked me to a bathroom where for reasons known only to my body, it decided a poop was required. I've never cried so hard in my life and never on a toilet. I've never felt pain like it. I thought I was going to die!

After that traumatic toilet trip a midwife got a wheelchair and took me down to the nicu to see my lo. It brought back memories of my little boy which was hard. She was in her incubator, under phototherapy due to severe jaundice, feeding tube in, and catheter in her hand for antibiotics. Turns out our blood types are incompatible and this was causing her trouble =[ I was able to have a cuddle though and tried her at the breast again but she fell asleep. The jaundice was taking all of her energy so she was quite lethargic. She had a heart scan done as I'd been told at 20 weeks and 26 weeks she may of had a ventricular septum defect. Thankfully the scan was clear so that was one less thing to worry about =]

After two days in nicu I went down to see her and was told she was able to move to scbu YAY lol. They wheeled her in her incubator round to that unit (next door) and she was put on phototherapy again.

She ended up spending two weeks over there which was hard as I was discharged on January 16th. I was given an electric pump to borrow at home so I could bring in expressed milk for her. As she was still really struggling with latching on and I wanted her off tube feeds asap, I gave permission for the nurses to feed her ebm via bottle. Something I now regret as my milk supply (despite still expressing regularly and trying her at the breast) has dwindled to about 50mls every 5/6 hours on a good day. I'm gutted about this as I'm having to mix her feeds with ebm and formula. Nothing against anyone who chooses to formula feed but it was something I really didn't want to do so I feel a bit of a failure in terms of feeding her =[

I travelled to hospital every day to see her and got excited after a couple of days when I arrived and she was off phototherapy and her feeding tube had been removed. This was short lived as both were back the next day!

Long story short she was finally discharged on January 24th =] she was still jaundice but she was feeding on demand so they were happy for her to come home as her jaundice level was below treatment line.

I have visits twice a week from a neonatal nurse to check her weight and feeding. Her jaundice finally went around a week ago which I'm so glad about because she was having blood taken every couple of days to monitor the level and watching that and trying to calm her was heartbreaking =[

She is now 6 weeks and one day old and weighs 6lbs 4oz and is 19.5 inches long. I managed a 10 minute breast feed yesterday for the first time but apart from that I'm expressing as much as I can and topping up with formula still. She was sent home on folic acid syrup which she has to take every Saturday, sodium feredetate every day and dalivit multi vitamins every day all of which have to be taken until she's at least 6 months! Due to her being a premie.

I am so in love =] She's beautiful and I'm still sometimes in shock that she's actually here. She has an amazing personality already and I'm the happiest I've ever been. She's very colicy atm but it gives me even more reason to give her lots of cuddles and kisses.

Sorry this is so long lol I'm just on cloud 9 and no amount of sleepless nights could change how I feel. She's perfect and I feel blessed to finally be a mummy.

I want to thank all of you for all of the support and shoulders to cry on I've received over the past few months. I couldn't of got through everything without you ladies. I am so glad I had you all <3

Here are some photos of my little pumpkin. Thanks again for everything and I wish you all the same happiness that I feel. Its taken over ten years to get here but seeing her and holding her now makes it all worth it xxxxx

The quality of these is a bit crap sorry.

My consultant holding Erin after she'd stitched me up. If it weren't for this lady I wouldn't be a mummy. I owe her so much!
https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/38bbe6b2.jpg

A few hours old <3
https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/1fcaac72.jpg
https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/7cd2ec54.jpg

Phototherapy for the jaundice
https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/76cc71dc.jpg

Given a dummy to encourage sucking for breast feeding
https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/a3012705.jpg

https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/bc88b7ac.jpg

https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/eabca468.jpg

At home <3
https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/0c1000de.jpg

https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/5fc541a1.jpg

https://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu254/xsprinklemykissesx/d1a4e6de.jpg


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## Maple Leaf

Aw after everything you have been through. ( looking at your ticker) I am so pleased for you. Your little girl has some sibling angels looking after her. Congratulations mummy. :)


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## kdutra

Wow!! amazing story and your baby girl is just beautiful!! Congrats


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## Mandy82

She's beautiful!! Thanks for sharing


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## Macciemoo

Oh she is just perfect!! Congrats! Such a pretty little girl! 

Xxx


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## happygal

Huge congratulations hun x


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## HellBunny

A huge congratulations to you, she is perfect! lovely birth story xxx


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## Mira24

awww congrats shes so precious and adorable!!!


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## AngelUK

She is utterly adorable! Congratulations on your lil princess and lots of :hugs: to you both! xxx


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## shinona

Wonderful, wonderful news and so many congratulations!

She is just beautiful. I especially love the sunbathing photo :thumbup: Erin is a lovely name too.

x


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## youngmommy2

What a little trooper she is! congrats!


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## Little_Nugget

Thanks ladies =] it's still sinking in tbh *giggles* I didn't think it was possible to love another person so much. I've never been so happy.


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## LisK

Awwww she is so adorable! Congrats :)


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## tryin4baby

shes beautiful, congratulations xxx


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## plastic

HUGE CONGRATS and gosh shes just beautiful!


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## Wantingbbbump

A huge congrats for you!! She is beautiful and I am so happy for you!!!


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## libbylou

I know it's probably partly pregnancy hormones, but I'm all teary eyed for you! What an incredible story and what a beautiful little girl! A big congrats to your family!


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## immie

So so soooooo happy for you. You have such a beautiful daughter!:) Well done, you've done amazingly xxx


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## stickylizard

huge congratulations! well done you she is gorgeous xxx


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## Mari30me

So very happy for you:) She is absolutely beautiful!:hugs:


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## Little_Nugget

Aww you guys! :cry: if I could give you all chocolates and a thank you card I would. Seriously if it weren't for you all on B+B I'd have lost my strength and probably mind too by about 6 weeks!

I received so much support and advice from people here and it honestly got me through some pretty terrible bouts of depression and fear. I'll never be able to say thank you enough. Erin wouldn't be here if it weren't for everyone that gave me support.

She really is beautiful. She's a good baby that doesn't really fuss and every moment with her is a pleasure =] I love her so so much <3


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## pooch

She is so cute!!! Congrats!


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## AdrienMarie

AWWWWW....so beautiful!!! Congratulations!!!!! :happydance:


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## Sew_Sweet

She is so precious! Congratulations!!


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## cutemom2be

Huge Congratulations to you and your family :flower:
I'm so happy for you, well done mum :thumbup:
She's absolutely beautiful baby girl. :cloud9:
xxx


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## sunshin3girl

Heartiest congratulations to you! It warms my heart to read such a lovely birth story and also affirms my belief that one must not give up hope. :)


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## crazylilth1ng

She is gorgeous! And if anyone deserves her it's certainly you!!! Congratulations!


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## FiNZ

Awwww, she is absolutely beautiful, and I am so happy for you. CONGRATULATIONS!!! You deserve every ounce of happiness you are feeling now!! xxxx


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## Little_Nugget

Thanks ladies =] little monkey has had me up all night wanting to play lol I'm shattered haha but it's so worth it! xxx


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## lozza1uk

Congratulations, she's lovely!


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## dwl

Congrats, she is gorgeous.


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## Blizzard

After everything you've been through I just know you'll treasure her and she's going to think she hit the jackpot having a mummy who loves her so much. Xxx


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## lisab1986

Awww shes just so perfect! Congratulations!!! shes beautiful :thumbup:


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## Fruitymeli

aww big congrats :D


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## zennie

Congratulations :hugs:
She is so adorable.
Fabulous name too :flower:


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## george83

what a beautiful little girl, congratulations. We have those dummies for my son and seeing how normal they look on him and then how big they look against your little girl i can only imagine how tiny and precious she is, i hope you enjoy every single minute of her you deserve it, congratulations xxx


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## Kyliem87

She is absolutely adorable hun! I'm so glad you made it in the end...you've been so strong to get to this point and thoroughly deserve it! I'd say enjoy every minute but I know you will! Congrats mammy! xxx

:flower:

P.S - I have that very same bedding haha happy asda shopping! :thumbup:


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## Tink81

Woo hoo! Congrats! :)


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## Trying4num2

Beautiful birth story and even more beautiful baby girl. Congratulations!


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## susan36

massive congrats . your little girl is beautiful :flower:


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## Little_Nugget

Thanks ladies =] I'm getting teary eyed reading all of your lovely comments! xx


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## Little_Nugget

Rather than starting a new thread can anyone recommend somewhere that sells nice baby memory books? The ones you put like baby's first smile, first tooth etc


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## DaisyBee

Huge congrats to you!!! She is so beautiful! I'm sure you are just so happy after everything you have been through to get to this point. xxx


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## YoshiPikachu

Awww Congratulations! :D


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## mrsrof

So many congratulations to you honey, she is just gorgeous xxx You're such an inspiration after all you've been through xx


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## lady_V

so happy for you, she is a little lovely x


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## beanzz

Congrats she's gorgeous xx


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## Pookie 73

Huge congratulations to you, she is a beautiful girl :flower:


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## Little_Nugget

Thanks everyone =] when do the nerves go? Lol I'm so overwhelmed by everything atm. Can't stop looking at her <3


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## apaton

Marks and Spencer do nice books, congrats mummy she I'd beautiful xxo


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## loverguts

Erin is gorgeous!!!
What a lovely story, thank you for sharing :)


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## capegirl7

Congrats Mama!! She is beautiful :)


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## j3ss

She is so beautiful. :) Congratulations!


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## Kristin52

congratulations! she is soooo beautiful! you deserve her!


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## Ems77

I agree, after everything you have been through... Wow! You deserve her and she is so gorgeous! :happydance:


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## hakunamatata

https://i1127.photobucket.com/albums/l634/hakunamatata2012/congratsbaby-1.gif


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