# Silent Miscarriage and infection



## Talia Blake

Hello Everyone

I am new to this site and i have seen various posts on this subject, but felt like non quite answered my questions.

Me and my hubby went for our first scan with our first every baby at 15 weeks. Happy that we were now in the 'safe stage' told all family and friends and even started buying a house to accommodate. However when we went for the scan at 15 weeks , we found the baby had died at 7 weeks. Which was awful. When this happened a nurse came in to discuss our options ( a very hard-faced nurse who couldn't understand why we were upset at th loss at such as early stage, not sure if this was genuine or if they are meant to be harsh ans have no emotional involvement to help you ) anyway, she said the best thing to do was to allow for a natural miscarriage and let the babies remains naturally leave the body yet clearly it had been 8 weeks and my body still thought it was pregnant. So i went and booked in for the medical option which i will get in two weeks. Im just worried about getting an infection and infection preventing any more babies..has this problem happened to anyone?? The nurse said it wouldnt really make much of a difference , i just finding it very hard to trust the doctors and nurses at the moment. Because i feel i could have found alot sooner about the death. I went to the midwife at the end of July and had blood tests, but she was going on holiday for a month n thats why my scan was so late along with my next mid wife appointment. When i went to the midwife when she was back of holiday, antigens were detected ..basically in my blood it showed the baby had died, and the hospital had been trying to warn me and get me in, but they had been sending letters to the wrong address, for reasons i am unsure off. so when the midwife was back from holiday, she said i think there is a problem, the antibodies in your blood show the baby maybe ... and then just stopped there!. and when i asked her to finish her sentence she refused a few times. she said its fine and you will have your scan next week. Now i know that the baby was dead and obviously she realised this. i cant help but feel let down that i couldn't get the blood tests results sooner or no one phoned me when they clearly knew there was a problem. i know it would have hurt at 7, but working in a school and it being over the 6 week holidays i had time to bond get excited and bought lots of stuff etc.. I know in insight there was A LOT more i could do myself, but this being my first every pregnancy, i put a lot of trust in others and i feel they have failed me a little bit . If i conceive again i will definitely pay for private early scans a few people on here seem to mention babybond.

Thank you , i think i just needed to get this out somewhere!!!


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## bernerdbutt

First of all, I am so sorry for your loss. If you need to cry and talk, we are all here for you.

One of my first questions after my missed miscarriage was whether I was in danger of infection. I was supposed to be almost 10 weeks, and my baby died at 6 weeks. It seems likely that dead tissue would put someone at risk of infection. My doctor told me that being before 10 weeks, it is safe enough to try to miscarry naturally (although most women prefer the surgical option).

After 10 weeks, it becomes more likely that the mother is at risk for infection and dangerous blood loss with natural miscarriage at home. If you trust your doctor, I would say do what makes you most comfortable. But, it concerns me that you may be putting yourself at risk because of the information my doctor told me. 

I just had a d&c this week. I was so scared, I was literally shaking that morning. I cried to the point of embarrassing myself at the hospital. But, honestly the iv was the worst part of the whole thing. After the anesthesia is administered, you are napping and wake up to it being all over. So, if you do end up going through the surgery please don't be scared. 

Get a second opinion if you can. And, please don't wait because it would kill me to think that you are putting your health and fertility at risk in the mean time. 

I hope you get answers and can begin the healing process.
*Hugs*:hugs:


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## ctimi16

Hello
I am terribly sorry you are going through this :hugs: 
I had a missed miscarriage at 6 weeks but I only found out 5 weeks later. The woman who did the scan was quite insensitive and simply told me that the baby had been absorbed by my body but all the rest is there and that can cause cancer. I was numb. Then the doctor came in and he said not to worry about that. I was very scared of an infection, kept checking my temperature every day. I was told I could wait, choose the pills or have a d&c. Since there was no baby anymore, I saw no point in waiting. I went for the pills but had a d&c anyway after that because of remaining tissues.

I can only say to be on guard of any signs of infection: a lot of bleeding (more than one pad an hour for 3 hours), chills, fever, bad cramps that don't go away with ibuprophen. If you get any of these, go to the hospital. 

I am not sure this helped you...I am sending you lots of love and hugs :hugs::hugs:


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## Talia Blake

Thank you very much for both of your replies. i have found this a great help. I feel less like im just paranoid and unhinged but as though my fears are based on real consequences! I am having the pill this week, and hopefully i will not need D&C too, as i can not bear the thought of that. But hopefully things will go as well as could be expected. And thank you very much again for your replies as it was a strange one :hugs:


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## Andypanda6570

I am so very sorry for your loss :cry::cry: I lost my Ava in March at 18 and half weeks. I gave birth to Ava and we buried her on 3/11/2011. I was set up for a procedure called a D & E but I never made it to the hospital and ended up giving birth to her in my bathroom/ I know after 15 weeks you need to get this procedure not a D and C but A D and E, cause after 15 weeks the baby is to big for a d and c procedure. I think whatever choice you make is the right thing to do, for me I could not bare the D and E:cry: so while traumatic what happened to me in my eyes it was for the best. I held Ava and told her how much we loved her. It took me a long time to get to a place where I am not crying constantly, it's been 6 months. My SIL lost her baby 6 weeks after I lost Ava :cry::cry::cry: She was 17weeks but they think the baby died around 14 weeks she choose to get a D & E and she seems fine this was in April, I guess there is no right or wrong way only a way for each of us as we all are different/
I am just so sorry :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## sarah986

So sorry you had to go tru this. Just to let you know in my hospital they told me that ii decide to start trying again and do fall pregnant that i can phone the epu there and book an eary reassurance scan there as i have already had a loss. (they said no need to go through my GP). Worth finding out if you can do this when the time comes as it would put your mind at ease.xx


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## Cartersmomm

Hi Talia,

I just stumbled upon your post, a few years late, I know... As I am also searching for some answers. 
I'm wondering if you ended up having your d&c surgery and how it went, or if you ended up miscarrying naturally while waiting for your appointment? 
I found out 2 weeks ago that our baby had stopped living at 10w5d and have been waiting for her to pass naturally. It has been 8 weeks since the loss and I'm growing weary of waiting and also worried about infection after waiting so long. 
Just wondering how your experience ended and if you had any trouble conceiving after your silent miscarriage. You may have already been blessed with a child :winkwink:

I too had a very insensitive ultrasound technician. Told me there was no heartbeat and immediately left the room, I started balling and when the doctor came in they didn't even ask if I was ok or if they could call someone (as I was alone, thinking it was a routine ultrasound) then when the doctor was finished the tech told me I could go now. :dohh: nice bedside manner!!


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## Hellymay83

firstly, I'm so sorry for your loss. :hugs:

I found out I had a mmc on the 25th February, I should have been 8 weeks 5 days but my baby died at 7 weeks 4 days, I chose medical management (pessaries) because I didn't want to wait weeks to miscarry naturally and didn't like the idea of a d&c, I had them 2 days later on the 27th.

It was all over quite quickly for me and finished miscarrying 3 days later on the Saturday, however that day I started to feel dreadful, I wasn't bleeding but had severe flu like symptoms that appeared very suddenly and in the space of a few hours my muscles had started to shut down all over my body, my thighs were the first to go stiff, then my fingers and wrists and then my biceps and triceps. Then I started getting excruciating cramps in my abdomen. My dh rushed me to a&e where it was confirmed I'd got an infection in my uterus and had spread around my body in a matter of hours, I was given the strongest penicillin available and signed off work for 3 weeks and it did take 3 weeks to recover, for a week I was so poorly I couldn't get up out of bed.

The doctor told me that infections are uncommon in the time frame of my mmc and that I was in the minority. If I hadn't had medical management it would probably have been a lot, lot worse. I think for me, there was already an underlying infection, I was just lucky I chose medical management. 

The risk of infection is something like 2% xx


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## lhancock90

I am so so sorry for you loss lovely. The other girls have answered your questions i just wanted to offer support.

xx


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