# having twins and scared!!



## wishingfor3rd

I recently found out that we are expecting twins and even though i have always wanted twins i find myself terrified now! first of all is this normal, or am i the only one? i almost feel depressed at times and that makes me feel like a horrible mother because i do love these babies, im just not sure how its going to be when they get here?! i have two other children and im afraid they are going to feel like they are being pushed aside when the twins get here, so i feel guilty about that too. im just so scared, we need to buy a minivan now and we only have a three bedroom house that 6 people need to squeeze into once they get here (which means my older children will have to share their rooms) am i the only one who feels like or has felt like this and does it go away or get better as the pregnancy goes on?


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## lizziedripping

You're not alone chick, and yes we have ALL felt this way in one way or another. 

I cried buckets for the first few weeks after finding out because we had just got our older two to a decent age and had started to enjoy them and more freedom. I had longed for a third baby, but had waited a while to try. 

When we did conceive I was so uncertain, but then terrified to discover it was two! I also had the added worry about getting to term because my second had been born at 24wks, and the pregnancy meant bed rest and fear for me. 

Once over those first few months however, and particularly when I reached a decent gestation (28wks) I began to relax, get excited, and now I can say that the babies are the best thing that ever happened to all of us (big kids inc.) They adore their baby brothers, and there has not been one ounce of resentment or jealousy on their part. My family feels complete somehow, and tho busy the household is full of fun, laughter and love. This doesn't mean I'm not tired and jaded every once in a while, but it works and I wouldn't change it.

I had such fears and worried about every eventuality, but in the end hun it just all worked out - it will for you too, so try not to worry ;). Congratulations xxx


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## Alwilan

Hun you are totally normal, still every couple of days I have a breakdown about how I'm going to cope, are the others going to lose out - even though I am over the moon about my twins and they mean the world to me.

We have just had to buy a Chrysler Grand Voyager to fit all the children and buggies, it feels like such a bus and I loved our old car, and my 2 eldest sons have gone back to sharing a room. However as soon as I have done these things I feel better and that we are moving forward to meeting our beautiful girls. I find it is the anticipation of changes that is worse.

Things do improve when you start properly showing and feeling them move.

It also doesn't help that when you tell people they usually are so over the moon and think how lucky you are (which we are) but without thinking of all the consequences.

My mother in law came out with a corker the other day and said "I think it must be easier to have twins than 1 baby as they will do so much for each other"
WHAT?! like change each others nappies, feed one another in the night and always want to do the same thing.

Relax what you are feeling is totally normal, I joined my local twins club where I have met other expectant Mums and when you start talking to them and realising your feelings are totally natural you feel tons better.

Take Care x


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## chelsearose

Hi everyone, im expecting twins - boy and girl. i am 28 weeks on saturday and starting to get nervous as time seems to be going so quick. i have a little girl who is nearly 14 months and is a very busy little girl! i am pretty organised, nearly have the nursery ready and have just bought a double pushchair - baby jogger city mini double which i love. i am struggling to find a baby monitor with a split screen though so i can view both at the same time. so much to think about with 2 on the way aswell as looking after a little one aswell. xx


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## mamato2more

There will just be more love in the house..No worries there! The older ones will adore the twins, and they will be so loved! They will get to help with them and they will love it..Dont worry about that at all! The older one will be able to brag about them, and hold them for Mama, all sorts of things..They really are just a blast with the babies! 
As far as sharing rooms, my sister and I are so close because we shared rooms our whole lives. We fought, played, talked, etc...I am so thankful for it now..To this day, we talk every day, and she was at the birth of my twins..Sharing rooms makes them closer..It makes them not selfish, because they HAVE to be considerate of others. It makes them better human beings...in my opinion...Just wait..you will see the love grow, and grow...


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## wishingfor3rd

thanks so much everyone! hearing that im not the only one with fears for both my two older children and the twins makes it a little easier to think about! i just still feel so bad about making my daughter(8) share a room after being in her own room her whole life! and since we still dont know what we are having i cant even picture what we are going to do and who is going to sleep with who! for those of you who have had to do this, would you put the twins in a room together and have my dd who is 8 and my ds who is 3 share a room? or since they arent the same sex should i keep them seperated? im so confused!!!! aaahhh!!!


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## 4ullHouse

Even before I found out that I was pregnant, I had a bit of issues with deciding where people would sleep and with who. I've got a 4 bedroom house, but my mother lives with my family so she has one room, dh and I have a room.. and that leaves 2 for the kids. Originally my oldest dd had her own room because she's 4 years older than my next oldest child.. But, I decided once my son turned 6 that he was to old to be sharing a room with his two other siblings.. so, atm my son has his own room and my 3 girls share a room. Now, we're suspecting twins and totally freaking out about what the sleeping arrangements will be once we have the new addition(s). If it's a boy, obviously, that would be extremely convenient because he could just share a room with my son who already has bunk beds in his room. If it's a girl though, we'll have to move my sons bunkbeds out of his room and into the girls room and it'll be 4 girls sharing a room and my son having his own room. (holy crap!) But, what if it's two? 6 kids, and 2 rooms. Pray they're boys I guess is the answer for me. If they're girls though, I guess we'll figure it out then. What ever the case, I just hope for healthy and know that everything has a way of working out. :)

Keri


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## apple84

Well my twins aren't here yet, but my brother and sister are twins and when they were born they shared a room and my brother and I shared a room. Once the twins were out of cribs (2.5/3) then my sister and I shared a room and the boys shared a room.


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## wishingfor3rd

thats kind of what im hoping for :wink: because if i have boy/girl twins it will be easy having two boys ina room and two girls in a room! but i still feel bad for my daughter as she will be 9 years older than the baby and i hate her having to share as she gets older and wants a bit of privacy, but i guess we will manage either way and who knows maybe she will like it?!


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## mamato2more

Having her in with her little brother is just not a big deal..I dont think it is anyway..She could really just be a helper to you..She's at a great age for that..And, it will open the door for the two of you to spend some awesome time together. With my children, every single one of them gets to go out with myself and my hubby alone together for time. Be it to the store, or whatever..And, when the babies were little, we'd put one in one buggy, one in another and the attention you get is quite funny..Your daughter will eat it up, especially if they ask her..Are they twins?? Blah, blah blah...She will get to answer, and be proud!


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## Miss MellyG

Same here!!

Everyone one said.. Wow you must be excited & happy! I've lied & said that I am.. however deep down?? I'm happy but not over the moon about it.
I was feeling really guilty about feeling like that & it was only when I got together with one of the other mummies on this board & she more or less told me that she felt the same way too that I started to relax & realise that feeling like this is normal!

I don't expect anyone apart from multiple mummies to understand how this feels, I could never tell anyone that this is how I feel.

Anyway, what's done is done, we made 2 babies & now I've got over the shock of it all, if anything was to happen to one of them I would be devastated. 

I'm really looking forward to the future, doesn't stop me worrying everyday about it though!


Congratulations on your multiple pregnancy. I was told that we are chosen to carry twins because we are the best mummies in the world. Probably not true but makes me feel better


xxx


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## Mea

I felt the same when I first found out we were pregnant with twins I was sort of happy as I was pregnant but terrified as it was two!!! During the early days I felt guilty for thinking I wish I was only having one!!!!! 
But as I got used to the idea of having two I started to realise how wonderful it was going to be. 
They are now 6mnts old and it's not been easy at times, but being a twin mum is amazing and wonderful and many women do not get to experience this.


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## wishingfor3rd

thanks again ladies! im sooo glad i posted this because i was afraid i was going to be judged by other twin moms because i thought i was the only one to think like this! i think my family is catching on to my feelings cause everyone keeps asking me whats wrong all the time! i just tell them that im tired or whatever but deep down im terrified, so its nice to be able to discuss this stuff with women who have gone through the exact same thing!


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