# me and my boys



## moomin_troll

well its official im now a single mum of 2 boys.
im so worried i wont be able to do it :( already ive found myself losing my temper with zane as hes been playing up.
zanes been thru so much, i feel awful for him that hes not the centre of attention anymore and he has to wait
any words of wisdom from other single mums of 2 or more?


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## xSophieBx

I don't have any advice as I only have the 1 but wanted to say congratulations :) Take a min to just breath when his playing up and carry on.. you'll be a fab mummy of 2. Have u got family/friends around to help you out when u need a lil break? The new baby is only a week old, so its gonna take a few weeks to adjust.. they always say the first 4 weeks are the worse, so just concentrate on getting thru those and you'll be fine... I also believe in a good routine so I think once u get urself into 1 of those everything will just fit into place - don't stress xx


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## moomin_troll

my mum helps when she feels like it, she was supposed to stay with me for the first 2 weeks but she got bord of helping and left me to it because she wanted to watch big brother at her house.

corey is also breastfed so it doesnt help things when hes constantly on me n zane gets jealous.

i no it will all work out because it has to, i just worry too much


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## whoops

Congratulations!

No advice either, but try not to worry - Zane will get used to Corey soon enough, it's just a big change for him now. And it's great for him to have a little brother, even if it means a bit of adjusting now - when things get tough, try and picture them running around and playing together in a few years time. 

As for you, don't be too hard on yourself. There's going to be times when you get angry but we all have those times! Nobody is the perfect mum - despite what some posts would have you believe... ;)


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## moomin_troll

oh i no what u mean some people make out they are amazing and do no wrong lol

if i was just a single mum to zane id find that so easy, even tho i wouldnt change having corey for the world hes amazing and i cant wait to see them playing together. i never wanted zane to be a only child thats why corey was planned.

i guess my hormoans are trying to level out now and ive got alot on my mind as next month is going to be hard...longish story!

my mum was a single mum of 3 at 25 and we all survived so i no i can do it because i have to.


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## MummyJade

:hugs: congrats love...

you will be fine your just adjusting... i have read many of your posts and think your so brave and strong with all what you've been through, your OH would be so proud of you and your boys... 

just take your time, if Zane is kicking up a huss just have a few moments to yourself... 

xx


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## Seraphim

:hugs:

Just remind yourself Zane will be ok and breathe.

xx


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## Fraggles

Hi I have 2 with a 14 month age gap so we had quite a bit of attention seeking from the eldest especially when feeding the baby. I had to make sure to find some time jut for me and him. Also do activities together while I feed baby. Usually reading a story or something like that.


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## taylor197878

i have 4 and a single mum my 2 girls are 15 and 11 they are fine but my boy zack is so hyper he will play up if im seeing or feeding brooke i do try to give zack just me time but u will get there and zane is just a small boy he will get there, 

it will takes yous a few months to get in a routine and for zane to adapt but he will.


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## adamantine

im a single mum to 2 boys also and ive done it on my own from when my youngest was new born though i lived with my parents for a few weeks to recover from my section.

there was about 2.5 years between my kids too so not too far off the difference between your 2 boys.

you are right about the line "i know i can do it coz i have to". it is so true. no one else to look after the boys. its annoys me when people ask "how do you cope?!" 
"erm coz i have to? who else is going to do it?" usually makes them look a bit sheepish and suddenly interested in their shoes lol.

routine was the key to me. and while i was breastfeeding DS2 i used to read to DS1 so they were both close at the same time and getting my attention and no one felt left out (not that DS2 had any idea at the time lol as long as he was fed he was a pretty good baby so i was blessed in that respect). and if DS2 had to cry for an extra minute or so till i got DS1 a drink or to fix that broken lego car then so be it coz i didnt want DS1 to get jealous of DS2.


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## moomin_troll

thanks ladies :)

this morning zane was pushing my buttons from the second i opened my eyes. i knew i would lose my temper so i asked my mum to have zane for the day and she has which suprised me, i really didnt think she would.

zanes got a cough from nursery so im goin to get him some medicine n hopefuly he will feel better soon.

zanes been good when im feeding corey, i think its all just me being tired n stressed thats causing the problem


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## AbbynChloe

I'm really embarrassed to say that I get really short with Chloe sometimes.

Chloe is a great girl, but sometimes I just feel myself getting worked up - I have to go and do the washing up or something.

Scary sometimes isn't it :-( xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## moomin_troll

AbbynChloe said:


> I'm really embarrassed to say that I get really short with Chloe sometimes.
> 
> Chloe is a great girl, but sometimes I just feel myself getting worked up - I have to go and do the washing up or something.
> 
> Scary sometimes isn't it :-( xxxxxxxxxxxx

i really felt like smacking him on the bum today, which i dont do and i could hear my tone getting really horrible and i dont want to talk to zane like that. hes a amazing boy, so i am really ashamed of myself today. glad hes off at his ganmas so he can have a fun day where hes the centre of attention and then he gets to come home to a hopefuly calm me.

i cant wait till i can get corey into a better routine n hes not constantly on my boob so i can have more just me and zane time.

my mum keeps sayin "if u bottle fed i could take corey" she doesnt realise im a single mum and bottle feeding would be 10 times harder for me when im alone.

i hate feeling like i cant do this being a mum of 2 but like i said i can do it because i have to. lifes such a bitch sometimes, but i no how lucky i am to have my boys.....thought id show them off :)


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## AbbynChloe

Oh look at Zane's hair!! he is gorgeous!!!

i know i just gotta get through today cos i'm at work tomorrow.

i am very lucky


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## moomin_troll

zanes a stunner lol

aswel as the stress of being a new mum of 2 theres alsorts going on which is getting to me so hopefuly after next month i should be able to move past afew things which should help

i think it will also be better for me when i do go back to work next year hopefuly. so i wont be in the house and ile be able to get myself a social life again


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## AbbynChloe

Thats very true - work has been an absolute godsend - I have no idea what I am going to do if I have to leave:cry::cry: Made some fantastic friends 

If you ever wanna chat, you know where to find me!! xxxxx


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## moomin_troll

zane came home an hour early and has been driving me crazy ever since. corey wants to sleep but zane wont stop shouting. so now im going to have to try and eat while feeding...should be fun lol


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## AbbynChloe

:-( I guess the only thing thing that consoled me was that at the end Chloe would HAVE to go to sleep, thats the only thing that saw me through xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## moomin_troll

AbbynChloe said:


> :-( I guess the only thing thing that consoled me was that at the end Chloe would HAVE to go to sleep, thats the only thing that saw me through xxxxxxxxxxxxx

:hugs:
i do look forward to bedtime x


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## anna matronic

I didn't congratulate you, you have 2 such gorgeous boys, you should be so so proud. I'm just reading things are a bit of a struggle atm, it will get much better soon! Is Zane struggling to adjust to not being number 1 anymore? :) I love his hair lol he is gorgeous big hugs xxxxxx


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## moomin_troll

thanks :D yeah hes been acting up trying to get more attention so ive been snapping at him and it goes round in circles :dohh:


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## taylor197878

i feel like i constanly snap at zack he is so hyper he is getting tested for adhd hhe is constant since the in he gets up till he goes to bed brooke is so laid back but she still need attention and when i go to c to her zack acts up even worse. i m hoping he wil calm down

it is very hard the now but it will get easier.

btw ur little boys are so cute and zane has lovely hair.


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## moomin_troll

taylor197878 said:


> i feel like i constanly snap at zack he is so hyper he is getting tested for adhd hhe is constant since the in he gets up till he goes to bed brooke is so laid back but she still need attention and when i go to c to her zack acts up even worse. i m hoping he wil calm down
> 
> it is very hard the now but it will get easier.
> 
> btw ur little boys are so cute and zane has lovely hair.

my oh had adhd and it can be hard if ur son does have it.

coreys hardly slept today so ive had to sit down n hold him so he can sleep n zanes not impressed....i just want a easy life lol


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## taylor197878

lol easy life and kids dont match lol

its very hard he is constat and very cheeky and very hard to control we have the doc at the end of september so im hoping i can get it all sorted.

im really sorry what happened to ur ex that must be very tuff to deal with that and have 2 young babies.

zane will get used to it he is prop also missing his daddy aswell plus a new baby aswell he will get there.


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## moomin_troll

taylor197878 said:


> lol easy life and kids dont match lol
> 
> its very hard he is constat and very cheeky and very hard to control we have the doc at the end of september so im hoping i can get it all sorted.
> 
> im really sorry what happened to ur ex that must be very tuff to deal with that and have 2 young babies.
> 
> zane will get used to it he is prop also missing his daddy aswell plus a new baby aswell he will get there.

i was never seperated from the boys dad so its been really hard, going from a married mum of 1 to a single mum of 2. even tho zanes been great he does miss his dad


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## whoops

:hugs:

I have to say, you come across so well on here - you never seem to sit around feeling sorry for yourself, you just get on with things. I have so much admiration for how strong you are.


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## moomin_troll

whoops said:


> :hugs:
> 
> I have to say, you come across so well on here - you never seem to sit around feeling sorry for yourself, you just get on with things. I have so much admiration for how strong you are.

thanks :hugs: 

i dont have time to feel sorry for myself lol 
im not the one who died so im the lucky one to still be here with our boys, i would like to be able to spend afew days by myself in bed with a box of tissues but i dont think zane or corey would let me haha

altho when i see couples walking around i do tend to stare and give them evils haha


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## anna matronic

moomin_troll said:


> whoops said:
> 
> 
> i dont have time to feel sorry for myself lol
> im not the one who died so im the lucky one to still be here with our boys, i would like to be able to spend afew days by myself in bed with a box of tissues but i dont think zane or corey would let me haha
> 
> You really bloody amaze me :) You know what I am going through atm, to look at you is really giving me hope xxxxClick to expand...


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## moomin_troll

anna matronic said:


> moomin_troll said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> whoops said:
> 
> 
> i dont have time to feel sorry for myself lol
> im not the one who died so im the lucky one to still be here with our boys, i would like to be able to spend afew days by myself in bed with a box of tissues but i dont think zane or corey would let me haha
> 
> You really bloody amaze me :) You know what I am going through atm, to look at you is really giving me hope xxxxClick to expand...
> 
> massive hugs to you, its horrible losing someone so young so unexpectedly and im really feeling for ur bil right now. i cried my eyes out to hear urs sisters babies were with her when she passed.
> 
> i cant say it gets easier but u do learn to live with it because life goes on, hes been gone 9 months now and its gone so fast even tho it feels like years.
> 
> if u ever need to chat just pm me xClick to expand...


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## anna matronic

Thank you :) :hugs:


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## MummyJade

Your boys are beautiful...(super broody now) Zanes hair is lush, my little girl has hair the same and i often think if she was a boy would she have hair like that too! 

you are doing an amazing job, be proud of yourself... kids push your buttons every day.. so dont feel bad if you feel like shouting or screaming... just breathe through it and walk out the room (if you can)... xx


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## Mumof42009

It will take time but it will all come together for you, try to spend time 1 and 1 with Zane while Corey is sleeping. Will he play on his own if you let him out in the garden and watched him? maybe he just needs to get rid of some of his energy. 
I've been there hun and came out the other side it's hard at first but you will get there :hugs::hugs: x


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## moomin_troll

he would go out in the garden by himself but its a horrible garden and isnt level so he tends to trip up.

hes been goo today, coreys been sleeping alot so weve been able to do afew things together and hes been off in his playroom watching dvds.

zanes got nursery tomorrow so thats good for him and im planning on expressing some milk so i can take him to the cinema and leave corey with a family member for afew hours. i want to take him to watch cars 2 :D


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## MummyJade

Aww glad he had a better day, and go enjoy cars 2! xx


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