# Pregnant with a no-contact order?



## Nazz4

I know this probably sounds crazy to most of you, but what happens if you get pregnant with a guy that has a no-contact order with you? It was not put on for any reason of violence or really any good reason at all just ass hole cops, so no worries, but it IS illegal for us to be together or talk to each other or anything so I'm really scared of what will happen to him or us in general. Does anyone have experience with this, or have a lawyer hubby who would know anything? lol. We would really like to get married too, but obviously we can't... the no-contact should be over in like 2 and half years, but that seems so long away and I would love to be married before having a baby. :( Please help! TY


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## NaturalMomma

You should contact a lawyer. Sometimes they can be retracted or lessened if there is a pregnancy/child involved and no violence, drugs, etc. However, you should not contact him until you get things straightened out because he can go to jail for the violation.


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## Nazz4

Well, see that's the problem... we aren't sure how much a lawyer could really do because if I'm pregnant then we obviously had contact when we weren't supposed to. It's quite the sticky situation and we are just stuck. :nope:


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## amjon

If you don't want the no-contact I don't see how it can be forced on you. I would go to court and ask for it to be removed (and not mention the pregnancy at all). Here you have to request a no-contact and can then go back and ask for it to be removed if you wish.


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## Nazz4

Well here you are supposed to write a letter to get the no-contact lifted, I wrote a letter and they denied it. We talked to a lawyer awhile ago and he was actually just as confused as we were about why the order was put on and why it is being enforced etc. etc. and he was unsure if going to court would really do anything, but said we could try (for a good chunk of $) and he said it would take a long time as well :/ but I guess that is what we will have to try and do, just scared it won't do anything.


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## missmiylove

Maybe you should find a lawyer that knows more about that?? idk maybe you would have a better chance that way.
I think you should take it to court.. i dont understand how they can put a no contact order on you for no reason.


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## gryphongrl

EDIT: I just saw your new post - guessing that you spoke to a lawyer casually as you mentioned you did not pay for the consult. Yes you will need to pay them unfortunately quite a bit and lawyers always say there is no guarantee on outcome, but if you hire a GOOD lawyer it will always improve your situation. I would guess in a metro area that this will run you about $2k for a retainer and that might cover the whole situation. 

Assuming you are in the US:
It really depends on what the accusation is. Perhaps no one was charged with anything, but a judge still ordered the no-contact? Or perhaps someone was charged but it was dismissed? Or, the case is still pending? If it was a violent crime that your partner was accused of AND he was convicted you might have a difficult time getting it lifted, especially because of the child on the way. But if there was no conviction it should be totally doable.
Either way, you still need a lawyer - even if they cannot get it lifted you need a lawyer bc you're just going to get in deeper with this situation if it's not resolved legally (for example, what if you guys break up down the road and he stops paying support, and you need to sue him for it?). The lawyer you hire will advise you as to your situation. He/she won't take information to the police - that's illegal. So there is no risk in consulting with one... I hope this works out for you.


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## gryphongrl

amjon said:


> If you don't want the no-contact I don't see how it can be forced on you. I would go to court and ask for it to be removed (and not mention the pregnancy at all). Here you have to request a no-contact and can then go back and ask for it to be removed if you wish.

You're thinking of a restraining order that is requested by one of the parties. This is an order signed by a judge and neither party can dissolve it without a court order. It's ordered to separate two people that the court decides should be separated (say, partners in crime, domestic violence cases where the victim might go back to the offender).


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## holidaysan

Why exactly was it put in place?
X


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## Nazz4

About 2 years ago I was in college and it was winter break. My roommates and I were all from a different city so we all went home for break and I had a bird at the time so I had him watch the house and feed/water the bird while we were gone. Our house was robbed one night and since he was watching the house and the one with the house key he was blamed for the robbery, the cops didn't bother with evidence or anything, just hands down it was him. He had to do like a month or 2 time and part of his probation is no contact with the victims including me even though none of us requested the no-contact order. The order lasts for as long as his probation which I believe is another 2 and half years or so at minimum.


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## NaturalMomma

The only way to over turn the no-contact rule is to talk to a laywer. You can get them free if you're low income, but otherwise you're going to have to pay a fee. The laywer will be able to help you write a better letter to the judge and/or set up a court date to have it over turn. While it might seem unfair and stupid, it is part of his probation and he really does need to stay away from you unless he wants to go back to jail, and normally it will be for the remainder of probation.


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## mother of two

Unfortunately there is not much you can do without a lawyer because a judge sided with the police. I wouldn't say y'all cant be around each other just not at your house because he could go back to jail if caught even if your family is okay with it. i had restraining orders against my daughters father but they were dropped by me not showing up to court. We are no longer together and have not been for two years. he would be the prime suspect because he had access to the house. does not mean he did it but he had access and that's evidence enough in some cases. i wish you the best of luck and hope you resolve this inconvenience soon.


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## number6

I was pregnANT with my bf with whom I hav a no contact order. I just miscarried tho.


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## Nazz4

number6 said:


> I was pregnANT with my bf with whom I hav a no contact order. I just miscarried tho.

I'm sorry, mc is horrible :cry: how far along were you? What were to guys planning on doing if you hadn't mced?


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