# Giving Birth without knowing you are pregnant!!



## Mamabel

Ok, I'm not sure if this is funny for us or frighteningly pathetic, but here it is: my secretary's brother's girlfriend sat up in bed yesterday and had a baby. Didn't even know she was pregnant. Baby was full term, healthy weight, and healthy. Her boyfriend didn't know she was pregnant either. Even crazier: this is the second time! This 'happened' a year ago, and they have a one year old son right now. (and by her observations, are raising him just fine and are attentive parents)

I was like: IMPOSSIBLE!!! But we looked on line, and there really is a condition or syndrome or something where women don't know they are pregnant until they give birth. And, research says that one in 600 births are like this!! ARe you kidding me???!!! Apparently, it happens to some relatively normal women: this person is not obese, or an obvious nutcase. My secretary's family is going to push for some psych intervention nevertheless. I suggested calling Child Protective Services, b/c they essentially endangered the welfare of the child. 

Okay: so, given our obsession with the smallest body twinge that may or may not signal AF, OV, etc, etc, etc.: can you even imagine this??!! I've had 2 babies, and I say it would take extreme denial to not know you are pregnant. Just incredible. 

So, I just had to get this off my chest, as well as my disappointment that anyone with the appropriate body parts can procreate so thoughtlessly.


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## iprettii

My co worker told me 2 months ago while she was at work (i'm a flight attendant) her daughter had stomach pains and went to the ER. The mother (my co worker) continued on with work and when that flight landed she gets a voicemail from her oldest daughter saying that the "stomach ache" weighed 7 lbs 6oz.

Her daughter had NO clue she was pregnant, didn't gain any weight, had her menstrual as normal, no symptoms or anything and because she had this persisant stomach pain she decided she had to go to ER to get it checked out. This girl is 17 yrs old and now has a 2 month old baby whom everyone was SHOCKED but truly adores.


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## Smiler79

I dont know much about not knowing u r pregnant until u give birth but when i was pregnant with my 11 yr old daughter, i did not find out i was pregnant til i was nearly 7 months along and only found out when i went 2 the docs with a stomach upset!


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## Mamabel

So crazy! But from what the statistics say, not as impossible as I'd thought. I know I'm pregnant from about 7 days after conception, and then I'm miserable, sick, nauseous, bloated, gain 40 pounds, and am completely taken over physically by the pregnancy. Why is life so unfair?! I think I'm almost jealous!


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## Ten

I think it's entirely possible and not necessarily due to an unattentive (or crazy) mom. Popular culture tells us you'll get huge, your period will quit, you'll have a million symptoms, your baby will kick the snot out of you, and in general you'll be miserable.

You can bleed on a regular period cycle while pregnant. Or you could have really irregular periods to begin with.

You can carry small, your kid might just be really mellow, and you might not get a lot of symptoms (or, at least, any more than you could chalk up to any other complaint).

On one hand, I'd really miss enjoying the bonding time of pregnancy.... on the other hand, it would be so nice to avoid all the fear that I'd lose my baby again!


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## goddess25

A good friend of mine gave birth without knowing she was pregnant. She is about a size 18 UK...so she is on the bigger side. She never put on weight in fact she lost some and thought she had a tummy bug so did her doctor when she went. She never showed, apart from some puking in the first few weeks which was put down too some IBS thing she has, she was fine no other symptoms. She never felt the baby move as the placenta was in front of the baby and next to her abdomen and she had periods every month that seemed the same as usual in terms of length and what was coming out. Thankfully she does not smoke or drink and even though she is bigger than average she is quite healthy and delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy who was 8lb.

It is amazing to think but genuinely a lot of people have no clue due to similar reasons above.


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## goddess25

P.S. I worked with this girl and she is a RN. She knows all the knowledge behind pregnancy incase any of you are still dubious.


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## Smudgelicious

There's a tv show here in the US called 'I didn't know I was pregnant' - you can guess what it's about ! Seriously, as unbelievable as it sounds there are people who never know they are pregnant till they give birth. And it's more common than you'd think !

The part that always gets me is that labour is so $%&#ing painful, it must be utterly TERRIFYING to feel that and not know the reason why. I remember with my first child telling my husband 'this can't be right, I must be dying !'


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## Eskimobabys

Mamabel said:


> Ok, I'm not sure if this is funny for us or frighteningly pathetic, but here it is: my secretary's brother's girlfriend sat up in bed yesterday and had a baby. Didn't even know she was pregnant. Baby was full term, healthy weight, and healthy. Her boyfriend didn't know she was pregnant either. Even crazier: this is the second time! This 'happened' a year ago, and they have a one year old son right now. (and by her observations, are raising him just fine and are attentive parents)
> 
> I was like: IMPOSSIBLE!!! But we looked on line, and there really is a condition or syndrome or something where women don't know they are pregnant until they give birth. And, research says that one in 600 births are like this!! ARe you kidding me???!!! Apparently, it happens to some relatively normal women: this person is not obese, or an obvious nutcase. My secretary's family is going to push for some psych intervention nevertheless. *I suggested calling Child Protective Services, b/c they essentially endangered the welfare of the child.*
> 
> Okay: so, given our obsession with the smallest body twinge that may or may not signal AF, OV, etc, etc, etc.: can you even imagine this??!! I've had 2 babies, and I say it would take extreme denial to not know you are pregnant. Just incredible.
> 
> So, I just had to get this off my chest, as well as my disappointment that anyone with the appropriate body parts can procreate so thoughtlessly.

why get her child taken way? she had no idea! its not uncommon from women to not know there pregnant haven't u ever watched that show? "i didn't know i was pregnant"


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## tinybutterfly

i don't get that either, why is she endangering her child?


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## Beadette

A friend of mine gave birth to a healthy baby boy last night and she only found out she was pregnant at 34 weeks! She had periods, had 3 negative pregnancy tests, was going boxing, broke her wrist on a night out, so had 3 xrays. Only put about 4lb on. She only went to doctors as she was so poorly wither her tummy/bowels. Doc asked for an ultrasound to rule out anything sinister and there he was!!!

I'm so excited to meet him! I'm not jealous or angry - she'll be a fabulous mum! Xx


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## kanga

I saw a program on this a few weeks ago, it happens! I almost didnt believe it either - how can a woman not know AT ALL.

Calling child Protective Services seems a bit overkill imo.


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## hb1

Don't see how she has endangered her child - not a very supportive family!!!


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## Mummy2Angel.

I just think its so weird lol, i say a program (i didnt know i was pregnant) the other night, and i just cant imagine not knowing at all lol


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## NatoPMT

crikey smiler, what did you think when you found out? were you panic buying prams and booties? 

this:

*(and by her observations, are raising him just fine and are attentive parents)
*
and this:

*My secretary's family is going to push for some psych intervention nevertheless. I suggested calling Child Protective Services, b/c they essentially endangered the welfare of the child.* 

are in complete contradiction. Serious problems for the family could arise from having Child Protection get involved, they might feel the repercussions of that in future and its not fair on the children if they are happy and well looked after. 

My sister's friend had a baby in the bath. She had some back ache and went for a soothing radox bath or somert, and came out holding a baby she didn't know she was pregnant with. And she's a nurse. AND she said it didn't hurt. Some girls have all the luck.


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## BabyQ

Amazing! I am actually so jealous, no worry and nerves for the full-term! I can't imagine the shock though!!!!!!

Before I started to TTC I had NOOOOOO idea about pregnancy, never had a pregnant relative close to me, and I am the first of my close friends to try for a baby. I didn't watch tv programs about pregnancy and never read a single article on the subject, so I can see how it can happen, not to mention the fact that some people continue to have periods through their pregnancy and no symptoms!


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## Robin in WV

Smudgelicious said:


> There's a tv show here in the US called 'I didn't know I was pregnant' - you can guess what it's about ! Seriously, as unbelievable as it sounds there are people who never know they are pregnant till they give birth. And it's more common than you'd think !
> 
> The part that always gets me is that labour is so $%&#ing painful, it must be utterly TERRIFYING to feel that and not know the reason why. I remember with my first child telling my husband 'this can't be right, I must be dying !'

That show is just scary all the way around. I watched it whenever I can catch on TLC. All I got to say is you have to seriously be brain dead not to know you are pregnant. I don't know what labor pains feel like but if it is anything like miscarriage, then knock my butt out and wake me up when I have the kid. I remember when I lost my twin girls I actually tore the door knob off the door screaming to the top of my lungs and my hubby is busy snoring. I threw the dang doorknob across the hall and it him in the head with it. Lord helps this man if I ever get pregnant and go into labor. He will have to wear protective gear so as not to get hurt:haha:


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## SmileyShazza

We have to remember that pregnancy is different for all of us. My friend literally put on 4lbs when she was pregnant which is a lot less than most people but yet some people put on 4 stone.

I have seen that programme I didnt know I was pregnant and I find it fascinating. I watched one where this lady just went upstairs to go to the toilet and when she sat on the toilet a baby popped out and went into the water :wacko: she then called for her husband who came and obviously was shocked to see shed had a baby but then to top it all 5 minutes later the same thing happened again and she gave birth to a second child :baby:

Imagine going from now knowing you are pregnant to suddenly having two babies and not being prepared for them at all.


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## johnoblueshoe

Unless this has happened to you then i dont think you can truely understand it fully... and i really dont think that you can say that the person involved is in any way an irasponsable mother or bad parent...

i know i knew with all of mine from the min i was pregnant but my sister didnt know till she was gone 5 mths and it does not make her any diifferant x


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## Lianne1986

Smudgelicious said:


> There's a tv show here in the US called 'I didn't know I was pregnant' - you can guess what it's about ! Seriously, as unbelievable as it sounds there are people who never know they are pregnant till they give birth. And it's more common than you'd think !

i watch that show here in the UK lol. x

i find it amazing too lol


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## Lawa

My Auntie had a scan b4 being steralised on her 40th birthday has three kids and they said you do know you are 5 months pregnant?

32 pregnancy tests and bloods done by docters


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## Mindy_mini

Mamabel said:


> I suggested calling Child Protective Services, b/c they essentially endangered the welfare of the child.

Sorry but if thats the case should we be calling the welfare department for all women carry on smoking until they find out they are pregnant or women who get drunk before realising? They are both endangering their babies - unknowingly - just like your secretaries, cousins, dog groomers, next door neighbours step son or who ever it is.


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## Boothh

i know a girl that didnt find out she was pregnant til she was 26weeks! she was on the injection, she thought she might be about 6weeks pregnant and did a test was positive when she went to the dating scan she was 26weeks! she didnt look pregnant at all though and she said she had felt some moving but didnt know what it was!! x


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## Mindy_mini

Lawa said:


> My Auntie had a scan b4 being steralised on her 40th birthday has three kids and they said you do know you are 5 months pregnant?
> 
> 32 pregnancy tests and bloods done by docters

Would have LOVED to have seen the look on her face!

Shes 40 - has decided her family is complete and wants to prevent it getting any bgger - to be told "Sorry Love, your family has one one to arrive!"

Seriously though, we all say every pregnancy is different so it cant be that uncommon for someone to not realise. You hear of women who think they are of a certain age and just accept that they are hitting the menopause when they are pregnant. totally miss the pregnancy symptoms because they think its something else.


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## Lawa

HTe look on her face wasnt the worrying things it as what came ut her mouth LMao


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## Lara310809

I woulnd't say it's thoughtless of them just because they didn't know they were pregnant. I too thought that you had to know if you were pregnant, but I've heard of this, and seen the TV show "I didn't know I was pregnant", and there are loads of women that don't know they're expecting, and it can be for various reasons:

* Obesity - don't notice you're gaining weight
* No symptoms
* Mistaking symptoms for something else, especially when a doctor tells you it's something else
* Thinking you or your partner are infertile, and assuming other reasons for your symptoms
* Denial - sometimes you can't control your own denial
* Irregular or non-existent periods
* Continuing to bleed when you're pregnant, and mistaking it for a period
* No weight gain, and sometimes weight _loss_
* Bad health, so you don't notice that you're pregnant because you already have ailments
* Mistaking your bump for weight gain, becuase I've seen full term women with tiny bellies


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## Mamabel

Well ladies, I stand corrected. I'll share this thread with my secretary. Thanks for your stories. I have never seen the TV show, not being much of a TV watcher at all (maybe 2x in the past year). It just seems incredible to me. I guess I was thinking that if you knew you were pregnant, and didn't get prenatal care, take folic acid, etc. and then gave birth in your bed, that would be negligence. Just like ignoring the baby once it got here. As a note, CPS wouldn't take the family's report, as they don't address negligence until the baby is on the outside. I don't know, I guess I just see children as such so precious and vulnerable, that it still bothers me to think they are not being cared for at any stage. 

However, thanks again for your feedback. It seems like some of us are just cursed by pregnancy-hell and can't even imagine it as being any different. 

Best,
m


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## Ten

Smudgelicious said:


> The part that always gets me is that labour is so $%&#ing painful, it must be utterly TERRIFYING to feel that and not know the reason why. I remember with my first child telling my husband 'this can't be right, I must be dying !'

I've heard a lot of people think it's appendicitis...



SmileyShazza said:


> Imagine going from now knowing you are pregnant to suddenly having two babies and not being prepared for them at all.

I think I would be giggling my butt off out of sheer incredulity... and looking for the hidden camera! 



Lara310809 said:


> * Mistaking symptoms for something else, especially when a doctor tells you it's something else

Such an awesome point... we're conditioned to believe whatever doctors tell us (because they're the "experts") and so often they're just guessing! 

For a non-pregnancy example, my mom went in for appendicitis when I was a kid... the ER guy told her it was an "abdominal migraine" and sent her home. If Dad hadn't brought her back six hours later, it would've ruptured while she was at home and she probably would've died!! I bet we all have stories like that... if not our moms, then a friend, a neighbor, a cousin, a neighbor's cousin...


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## Eskimobabys

Mamabel said:


> Well ladies, I stand corrected. I'll share this thread with my secretary. Thanks for your stories. I have never seen the TV show, not being much of a TV watcher at all (maybe 2x in the past year). It just seems incredible to me. * I guess I was thinking that if you knew you were pregnant, and didn't get prenatal care, take folic acid, etc. and then gave birth in your bed, that would be negligence. * Just like ignoring the baby once it got here. As a note, CPS wouldn't take the family's report, as they don't address negligence until the baby is on the outside. I don't know, I guess I just see children as such so precious and vulnerable, *that it still bothers me to think they are not being cared for at any stage. *
> 
> However, thanks again for your feedback. It seems like some of us are just cursed by pregnancy-hell and can't even imagine it as being any different.
> 
> Best,
> m

but she didnt know did she? if she would have known she was with child im sure the she would have taken pre-natals and consulted a MW and wouldn't have gave birth in her bed.(actually theres nothing wrong with birthing a baby in ur own home bc ppl give birth at home ALL the time.)you say it like it was intentional? did she know or didnt she know she was pregnant?:shrug:


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## goddess25

It would be nice in a way to not know like someone said before so you avoid all the stress of being pregnant but i can imagine how scared some of these women would be going into labour and being in active labour you would think that something very bad was happening indeed. I feel so bad for those poor ladies... imagine going to the toilet and out pops 2 babies. Obviously i knew with my son and by the time the 9 months were over i still dont think i was mentally prepared.


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## AuntieHeart

The reason our family was so alarmed was due to the fact that this was the *2nd* time in *1 year* that my brothers girlfriend carried to term two supposedly unknown pregnancies. I do feel she was being deceitful and negligent. My brother had to be awaken to a newborn baby and his girlfriend in a pool of blood clearly in shock. This was not a planned home delivery, which I have heard of, and can see being a relatively calm and stressfree way of bringing a child into this life but this was not the case. I guess our primary concern is how my brother as well as his girlfriend couldn't see that she was pregnant when we clearly could. I think in my brothers case it had a lot to do with the fact that both times she told him that he was on birthcontrol. I have seen the show "I didnt know I was pregnant", And the first time this happened we all gave her the benefit of the doubt...but twice in one year?! What would you do if this happened to your brother? Wouldn't you suggest that they seek some sort of counseling? Can anyone so unaware of whats happening in their own body be of sound mind to care for two babies under the age of 1? I really hope this isn't coming off as judgement, it is nothing but sincere concern for my brothers future and the future of my neice and nephew. P.S. This last time about a month before she gave birth we asked my brother straight out if she was pregnant and his reply was no way she is on birth control. I am as worried about his active denial in this as hers and just want to see that they both get the help that they need.


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## Eskimobabys

i hope she's not lying it possible she cud be tell him to wrap it up if yal think she's deceitful.


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## emilyjean

If she didn't know she was pregnant, but it was obvious to everyone else that she was, I would consider her to need some mental help. To be THAT far in denial, and for her boyfriend to be in denial, then there is definitely a psychological problem. 

So you guys could tell that she was pregnant? Could you tell with the first pregnancy as well?


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## hb1

Even if they decided to get pg that is entirely their decision that they are free to make - if they are lying then it's terrible that they feel the need to do so - it can not be a very supportive environment. 

If she is not lying then she may feel v alienated and let down being treated like this by his relatives at a time when she is very vulnerable.


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## petitpas

Personally, I'm with Mamabel that I think it's a little suspicious that this happened twice in a year. Suspicous not in a way that this woman is purposefully mean or deceitful, but in that she would need some sort of help. Hell, if this woman was in denial she must be in total shock about having another baby! I know I'd need counselling if I woke up one morning and had a baby to look after :shock:
After all, if this has happened twice, who is to say it won't happen another time? It'll probably be easier for a professional outsider to help this lady (and her partner!) to come to terms with what happened and find out where it is all coming from. I would think that in future the new Mum either needs help with her birth control methods, or help to be able to accept a new pregnancy and bond with the baby before birth.
I hope it all works out well for your family, Mamabel! xxx


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## Kayleigh Lou

My doctor told me that my second pregnancy was a stomach ulcer. That stomach ulcer weighed 8lbs 6 :dohh::haha::thumbup:

I must admit i found out when i was about 3 months gone though!!! :wacko:


xxx


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## mrsmartin91

AuntieHeart said:


> The reason our family was so alarmed was due to the fact that this was the *2nd* time in *1 year* that my brothers girlfriend carried to term two supposedly unknown pregnancies. I do feel she was being deceitful and negligent. My brother had to be awaken to a newborn baby and his girlfriend in a pool of blood clearly in shock. This was not a planned home delivery, which I have heard of, and can see being a relatively calm and stressfree way of bringing a child into this life but this was not the case. I guess our primary concern is how my brother as well as his girlfriend couldn't see that she was pregnant when we clearly could. I think in my brothers case it had a lot to do with the fact that both times she told him that he was on birthcontrol. I have seen the show "I didnt know I was pregnant", And the first time this happened we all gave her the benefit of the doubt...but twice in one year?! What would you do if this happened to your brother? Wouldn't you suggest that they seek some sort of counseling? Can anyone so unaware of whats happening in their own body be of sound mind to care for two babies under the age of 1? I really hope this isn't coming off as judgement, it is nothing but sincere concern for my brothers future and the future of my neice and nephew. P.S. This last time about a month before she gave birth we asked my brother straight out if she was pregnant and his reply was no way she is on birth control. I am as worried about his active denial in this as hers and just want to see that they both get the help that they need.


In a way, this seems kind of wrong in itself. I come from the LAND of unfair inlaws, and look it up-some women have periods every month while pregnant. some women don't show, or don't know much and chalk it up to stress or weight gain. If you had your period, and then had a negative preg test (cause tests are wrong all the time), what would you assume? that you weren't pregnant. this isn't neglectful, in my opinion. However, I do think you need to remember as you stated you are concerned for your brothers future and your neice and nephew-that's your brother's choice, not yours to make. and remember also that she is the mother of these children, not you or anyone else. Maybe he KNEW she was pregnant and didn't feel like telling you guys-it happens. trust me. This post just reminds me a LOT of my MIL and SIL, and hit a nerve BADLY.


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## veganmum2be

pleanty of people give birth without ever knowing. not even an incling.
this poor girl is haveing a psych assessment for not knowing she was pregnant?

just go watch an episode of 'i didn't know i was pregnant'
a woman gave birth to twins with out ever knowing a thing. 

perfectly possible!


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## Blah11

Okay so I know girls go through this but i just dont get how its possible :( I could understand up until 6 or 7 months if ur small and not showing or feeling many kicks but at the end of pregnancy u can see your entire stomach do a mexican wave :shrug: I think its more of a extreme sense of denial. Like they know theyre pregnant but trick their mind into thinking theyre not IYKWIM? Kinda like a reverse phantom pregnancy.


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## bky

Honestly if you were on birth control, had regular AF (or irregular) and didn't grow a belly or get symptoms...would you think you were pregnant? Would that be what popped into your head? There are women on here that have one or more of those individually (no symptoms, no bump, got pregnant on birth control, semi-regular bleeding), so I don't think it's unreasonable that it could be combined in one person. Even twice in a year. Sometimes even now my movements feel like muscle twitches and spasms (like you might get in your leg). I mean there is no way _I_ could miss me being pregnant, but I have no idea what other people's experiences are like.


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## Blah11

Do you not see your belly move? Mine used to literally shift sides.


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## bky

Yes mine moves. It literally looks like I have a wiggling rugby ball shoved in there. Does everyone's though? I just don't think it's fair to make judgments based solely on our own experiences. I would think it's unusual or abnormal that someone wouldn't know but I wouldn't necessarily disbelieve them. There was an Ask a Mum thread on someone who didn't know until 30 weeks, and another girl on here who had an eating disorder and didn't know until 28 weeks, and someone in 3rd tri now who complains of having no bump.


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## floofymad

Oh God, this thread scares the life out of me!
:dohh:
I'll be looking up that programme asap! x


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## Audball2108

WOW, really? Call a psyche because she didn't have a clue she was pregnant? What a _loving_ family she has. I feel bad for her! 

Honestly, I've heard of this happening SO many times in my little town. My health teacher, who I am a teachers aide for and also is my very good friend, didn't know she was pregnant and all day one day she was complaining about stomach cramps. She thought it was her period, but the next day she was gone and we were told she had a baby boy that night without knowing she was pregnant. And he was perfectly healthy. 

She was skinny, she said she never missed her period, and never was sick or tired. And she is a health teacher, so she could have figured out easily that she was pregnant if she had any of the symptoms, but she didn't.

So by saying that your calling child services because she didn't know she was pregnant, are you going to do that to every women who doesn't know? How insensitive. You know to know that she has a lot to deal with now too. Don't judge people, offer help.
Maybe your brother's girlfriend has something wrong with her that she can't tell if she's pregnant or not. You should be supportive and not go call the child protection agency on your own family.


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## LittleAurora

this is sad.

Altho its seems to me that they want to help her because it seemed obvious to every one else that she was preg. but she continued to deny it?

There is a girl here fromthe teen section who didn't know she was pregnant until 36 weeks! and she has a beautiful little baby boy!


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## floofymad

I feel sorry for them too. I've heard it's more common than people think, and who are we to judge?... Everyone's body is different and plenty of websites say that some women don't get any pregnancy symptoms at all. If you were getting a few symptoms, say nausea etc but were having your periods and had negative pregnancy tests, then you're bound to put it down to a bug or something aren't you?.....
There'll also be people who think they may be pregnant, but all the normal signs say they aren't (no missed period, negative tests etc) so they tell themselves they aren't and carry on as normal, otherwise everyone would say they were having a phantom pregnancy and trying to convince everyone they are pregnant when they're not!!!
Does that make sense?... lol x


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## Lianne1986

i think that this couples family should be supporting them instead of phoning child services. it does happen to ppl. on the tv prog u have all been talkin about 1 lady was preg with twins & she didnt know it, she had them on the toilet...

so its happened twice in a yr, well obviously the BC she was on simply isnt workin so help he go to the doctor to change it.
right now they are goin to need all the love & support they can get, id be worried tht if i rang child services on them id neva see them again.

if this was my brother id support him 100%


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## Linz88

Huh why on earth would u even fink to call child services, even if she did no she was pregnant, that wouldnt mean a thing, there was no such thing as ultrasounds 50 years ago, maybe she just opted to have the baby completely natural like they did in the olden days, its no ones business but her own. Jus leave her be, child services r for people neglecting amd abusing there children


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## GersPrincess

AuntieHeart said:


> The reason our family was so alarmed was due to the fact that this was the *2nd* time in *1 year* that my brothers girlfriend carried to term two supposedly unknown pregnancies. I do feel she was being deceitful and negligent. My brother had to be awaken to a newborn baby and his girlfriend in a pool of blood clearly in shock. .

I'm confused.. on your original post, you've said it is your secretary's brother's girlfriend, but on this post it is your brother??

If she does have this condition where she doesnt know she's pregnant or have any symptoms like others have mentioned, then it would follow suit that she would be unaware of any following pregnancies also. 

If this woman knew, then how was she in a pool of blood clearly in _shock_??

Assuming this is your brother's girlfriend, then that makes you this child's Auntie yes? I would have thought it would be more beneficial for a child to have a supportive family around it, supporting it's parents immaterial of whether they may or may not have known of it's existance, than to have a family pushing for psych evaluations and involving child services.

In this day and age I am sure that if the attending health professionals or family Doctors felt anything about this was in anyway untoward they would be looking into this themselves.

Edited to add: I was on the pill and breastfeeding when I fell pregnant with my second child when my first was 4 months old.. birth control doesn't always work. It doesnt mean I was a negligent parent - my second baby was just meant to be!


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## Lianne1986

GersPrincess said:


> AuntieHeart said:
> 
> 
> I'm confused.. on your original post, you've said it is your secretary's brother's girlfriend, but on this post it is your brother??
> 
> 
> very very very good point!!! :wacko:
> 
> Click to expand...Click to expand...


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## 123laura

GersPrincess said:


> AuntieHeart said:
> 
> 
> The reason our family was so alarmed was due to the fact that this was the *2nd* time in *1 year* that my brothers girlfriend carried to term two supposedly unknown pregnancies. I do feel she was being deceitful and negligent. My brother had to be awaken to a newborn baby and his girlfriend in a pool of blood clearly in shock. .
> 
> I'm confused.. on your original post, you've said it is your secretary's brother's girlfriend, but on this post it is your brother??
> 
> If she does have this condition where she doesnt know she's pregnant or have any symptoms like others have mentioned, then it would follow suit that she would be unaware of any following pregnancies also.
> 
> If this woman knew, then how was she in a pool of blood clearly in _shock_??
> 
> Assuming this is your brother's girlfriend, then that makes you this child's Auntie yes? I would have thought it would be more beneficial for a child to have a supportive family around it, supporting it's parents immaterial of whether they may or may not have known of it's existance, than to have a family pushing for psych evaluations and involving child services.
> 
> In this day and age I am sure that if the attending health professionals or family Doctors felt anything about this was in anyway untoward they would be looking into this themselves.
> 
> Edited to add: I was on the pill and breastfeeding when I fell pregnant with my second child when my first was 4 months old.. birth control doesn't always work. It doesnt mean I was a negligent parent - my second baby was just meant to be!Click to expand...

Original poster was Mamabel, not Auntieheart - different scenarios, different people x


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## Zanny

I think it's perfectly possible. With my first daughter I didn't gain much weight & just looked a bit porky, no real bump even at full term. I'm 6ft tall & I was a size 14 back then so not obese by any means.

I think it'd be nice not having to obsess over every little ache & pain or having to count down the weeks until your due date! What a shock it'd be though.


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## Abigailly

A bit different, but my friend who is the same age as me, about a size 14, incredibly sporty etc found out she was pregnant, did a test and it came back positive. So booked hersel into see a midwife, she had a feel and said 'this may be a shock but I think you're about 16 weeks along'. Emily almost passed out in shock as her fella is in the army and wasn't home then! So she was booked in for a scan 2 weeks later.

She carried on at work (as a life guard) as normal, 3 days before her scan she started getting back pains, 8 hours later Alysia was born weighing 7lbs9oz. Turns out Alysia was probably fairly overdue too (something to do with her skin been almost dry?).


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## floofymad

Abigailly,
What made your friend do the pregnancy test?...
Did she have periods and everything throughout as normal?...
x


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## Lianne1986

im confused...


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## flubdub

Mamabel said:


> I guess I was thinking that if you knew you were pregnant, and didn't get prenatal care, take folic acid, etc. and then gave birth in your bed, that would be negligence. Just like ignoring the baby once it got here. As a note, CPS wouldn't take the family's report, as they don't address negligence until the baby is on the outside. I don't know, I guess I just see children as such so precious and vulnerable, that it still bothers me to think they are not being cared for at any stage.

You make it sound like she did it on _purpose_. She didnt _know_ she was pregnant!!


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## flubdub

AuntieHeart is meant to be the guys sister (the secretary). The first poster said she was going to show her secretary this thread, and she has repied to it.

A friend of mine didnt find out she was pregnant until 7 months pg, then a few months later, found out she was pregnant again at 5 months. Turns out she had a hormonal imbalance that made the pill ineffective. It can happen, and stranger things _have_ happened.


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## Spiderspinz

My sisters friends mum when she was at school didn't know she was having a baby she sat on the toilet with stomach pains and she gave birth to the baby and it went into the toilet! Baby was fine tho I think it was a little girl she was a rather large woman so she didnt look any different there was a woman on the local news as well who didn't know she was pregnant and had been on the rides on alton towers and everything!


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## calm

I thought this only happened in eastenders!


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## sjb1985

Mamabel said:


> Ok, I'm not sure if this is funny for us or frighteningly pathetic, but here it is: my secretary's brother's girlfriend sat up in bed yesterday and had a baby. Didn't even know she was pregnant. Baby was full term, healthy weight, and healthy. Her boyfriend didn't know she was pregnant either. Even crazier: this is the second time! This 'happened' a year ago, and they have a one year old son right now. (and by her observations, are raising him just fine and are attentive parents)
> 
> I was like: IMPOSSIBLE!!! But we looked on line, and there really is a condition or syndrome or something where women don't know they are pregnant until they give birth. And, research says that one in 600 births are like this!! ARe you kidding me???!!! Apparently, it happens to some relatively normal women: this person is not obese, or an obvious nutcase. My secretary's family is going to push for some psych intervention nevertheless. I suggested calling Child Protective Services, b/c they essentially endangered the welfare of the child.
> 
> Okay: so, given our obsession with the smallest body twinge that may or may not signal AF, OV, etc, etc, etc.: can you even imagine this??!! I've had 2 babies, and I say it would take extreme denial to not know you are pregnant. Just incredible.
> 
> So, I just had to get this off my chest, as well as my disappointment that anyone with the appropriate body parts can procreate so thoughtlessly.

This happened to me with DS and I know it can be hard to believe if you never experienced it but it happens. Its nothing to do with denial or an unsuitable mother and to be honest I found that quite offensive. I dont want to be bitchy about it but I am the best mum that i can be and would not change my son for the world. He is my life and although he was a surprise he is no more wanted or unwanted than someone who was ttc for years. 

I was on the pill when i fell pregnant, had the regular periods, gained no weight whatsoever and was going about my day to day life for the 9 months i carried him with not the faintest of clues i was pregnant. My mum called an ambulance after finding me collapsed in the bathroom bleeding and 24 hours later my special boy was here!

This time round i am making up for the lack of symptoms from the 1st time and seem to have every symptom under the sun!


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## Agiboma

taking the baby away i think is to harsh


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## xprincessx

Agiboma said:


> taking the baby away i think is to harsh

i agree! Why should her baby be taken away if she genuinely did not know she was pregnant. That does not make her in the slightest an unfit mother Is her other baby in any harm? is that baby not being looked after properly? If so then fair enough i can understand that completely but if that baby is ok then what gives anyone else the right to assume this woman is unstable to be a mother. My best friend is 18 years old and she had no idea she was pregnant either and she had her baby unexpectedly. It happens and it's a lot more common than you think. I think the opinions some people have expressed on here about how women who didnt know they were pregnant are neglecting their children are really offensive. It has already offended one member on here as you can see who was in the same predicament. She looks after her baby and he seems to be well loved and cared for. This is a such a disturbing stereotype but the truth is it can happen to anyone...if i never took a test (which OH wanted me to do) i still wouldnt know i was pregnant. Having her baby taken away from her is so unjust it suprises me it was even brought up...sorry but some opinions on here have truly disgusted me and i imagine it has others too.

sorry i ranted alot there but i would be appalled if i hadnt known i was pregnant and i was being judged like this, please think how you would feel because it can happen to anyone including yourself x x x


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## Lianne1986

xprincessx said:


> Agiboma said:
> 
> 
> taking the baby away i think is to harsh
> 
> i agree! Why should her baby be taken away if she genuinely did not know she was pregnant. That does not make her in the slightest an unfit mother Is her other baby in any harm? is that baby not being looked after properly? If so then fair enough i can understand that completely but if that baby is ok then what gives anyone else the right to assume this woman is unstable to be a mother. My best friend is 18 years old and she had no idea she was pregnant either and she had her baby unexpectedly. It happens and it's a lot more common than you think. I think the opinions some people have expressed on here about how women who didnt know they were pregnant are neglecting their children are really offensive. It has already offended one member on here as you can see who was in the same predicament. She looks after her baby and he seems to be well loved and cared for. This is a such a disturbing stereotype but the truth is it can happen to anyone...if i never took a test (which OH wanted me to do) i still wouldnt know i was pregnant. Having her baby taken away from her is so unjust it suprises me it was even brought up...sorry but some opinions on here have truly disgusted me and i imagine it has others too.
> 
> sorry i ranted alot there but i would be appalled if i hadnt known i was pregnant and i was being judged like this, please think how you would feel because it can happen to anyone including yourself x x xClick to expand...

well said. i have to totally agree!!!


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## sjb1985

xprincessx said:


> Agiboma said:
> 
> 
> taking the baby away i think is to harsh
> 
> i agree! Why should her baby be taken away if she genuinely did not know she was pregnant. That does not make her in the slightest an unfit mother Is her other baby in any harm? is that baby not being looked after properly? If so then fair enough i can understand that completely but if that baby is ok then what gives anyone else the right to assume this woman is unstable to be a mother. My best friend is 18 years old and she had no idea she was pregnant either and she had her baby unexpectedly. It happens and it's a lot more common than you think. I think the opinions some people have expressed on here about how women who didnt know they were pregnant are neglecting their children are really offensive. It has already offended one member on here as you can see who was in the same predicament. She looks after her baby and he seems to be well loved and cared for. This is a such a disturbing stereotype but the truth is it can happen to anyone...if i never took a test (which OH wanted me to do) i still wouldnt know i was pregnant. Having her baby taken away from her is so unjust it suprises me it was even brought up...sorry but some opinions on here have truly disgusted me and i imagine it has others too.
> 
> sorry i ranted alot there but i would be appalled if i hadnt known i was pregnant and i was being judged like this, please think how you would feel because it can happen to anyone including yourself x x xClick to expand...


Thanks Princess, When I had DS i had everyone telling me i must have known i was pregnant but the long and short of it was I DIDN'T!

I had had blood tests done for other reasons by the docs during the time i would have been pregnant and if they couldnt tell me i was pregnant how couild i tell?

I understand that when you have every pregnancy symptom under the sun it can be hard to think that you wouldn't know, but to call people liars or unfit parents is wrong. 

If you have no symptoms, no weight gain, no bump, no movement, are having periods and feel normal, you are not going to one day think 'oh well i may be pregnant' are you!?

xx


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## calm

sjb1985 said:


> Mamabel said:
> 
> 
> Ok, I'm not sure if this is funny for us or frighteningly pathetic, but here it is: my secretary's brother's girlfriend sat up in bed yesterday and had a baby. Didn't even know she was pregnant. Baby was full term, healthy weight, and healthy. Her boyfriend didn't know she was pregnant either. Even crazier: this is the second time! This 'happened' a year ago, and they have a one year old son right now. (and by her observations, are raising him just fine and are attentive parents)
> 
> I was like: IMPOSSIBLE!!! But we looked on line, and there really is a condition or syndrome or something where women don't know they are pregnant until they give birth. And, research says that one in 600 births are like this!! ARe you kidding me???!!! Apparently, it happens to some relatively normal women: this person is not obese, or an obvious nutcase. My secretary's family is going to push for some psych intervention nevertheless. I suggested calling Child Protective Services, b/c they essentially endangered the welfare of the child.
> 
> Okay: so, given our obsession with the smallest body twinge that may or may not signal AF, OV, etc, etc, etc.: can you even imagine this??!! I've had 2 babies, and I say it would take extreme denial to not know you are pregnant. Just incredible.
> 
> So, I just had to get this off my chest, as well as my disappointment that anyone with the appropriate body parts can procreate so thoughtlessly.
> 
> This happened to me with DS and I know it can be hard to believe if you never experienced it but it happens. Its nothing to do with denial or an unsuitable mother and to be honest I found that quite offensive. I dont want to be bitchy about it but I am the best mum that i can be and would not change my son for the world. He is my life and although he was a surprise he is no more wanted or unwanted than someone who was ttc for years.
> 
> I was on the pill when i fell pregnant, had the regular periods, gained no weight whatsoever and was going about my day to day life for the 9 months i carried him with not the faintest of clues i was pregnant. My mum called an ambulance after finding me collapsed in the bathroom bleeding and 24 hours later my special boy was here!
> 
> This time round i am making up for the lack of symptoms from the 1st time and seem to have every symptom under the sun!Click to expand...

I am so amazed that such a thing can happen. It must have been a shock, however pleasant the surprise was.


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## petitpas

I don't think anyone was suggesting that this lady's babies should be taken away!

If you read through the whole thread, you'll see that initially the worry her family had was that this lady had not one, but two surprise births in one year. This, despite people pointing out to her the second time round that they thought she looked pregnant again. They were not asking for the babies to be removed, but were solely concerned for the health of the unborn baby and the mother who did not receive any prenatal care or any assistance at all for the births.

Let's all hope the family are doing well and that the young mum is getting all the help she can from her family and also her doctors (be it psychological or medical) so that a third occurrence of unassisted pregnancy/birth can be prevented.


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## xprincessx

i did read through the entire thread


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## Haych86

my friend was only 15 just in her last year of school and preparing to do her GCSE exams she went to the doctors for something to do with dizzyness and tiredness after an examination by 2 doctors she was sat down and told we think you are around 6-7 months pregnant. She was not showing as her uterus was growing more inside her than outwards and still had regular periods and put weight gain down to her eating more because of stress from her exams. Baby was born perfectly fine and healthy :):thumbup:


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## Catters

I am almost jealous.. can you imagine going through it without ANY morning sickness (or it being so little that you can chalk it up to something else???) .. heck... ANY of the symptoms so small that you can relate it to something else... yep.. just a little jealous ..

I have heard of women that didn't know they were pregnant and giving birth but yet feeling it was more of a stomach flu type cramping rather than full blown labor (again, SOOO JEALOUS!) because I, myself, felt like I was turning inside out.. just sayin'... :haha:


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## fairydreams

I have PCOS and was told years ago that I would not be able to conceive, so i feel very blessed to have been given the oppurtunity of being a mother not once but twice. I knew almost straight away with dd, i felt sick, tired, awful, achy and most of all was 2weeks late! however i didnt know i was pg with ds until late on, within the first 3 months of pg i still had periods, i had 2 gynae apps and an internal exam in which she just told me my cervix was swollen and i probably had an infection which she put me on ab's for, I was given a pg test at the beginning of the first gynae app which came up negative ( they later told me it was probably too early to have detected the hcg (?) levels). baby was laying towards my back so never felt him move. I kept being put on different meds for this that and the other and was put on a different pill to see if that stabilised my bleeding, and was warned that it would make me feel awful, so when i did go through a week of nausea and feeling generally crappy, i assumed it was just my body getting used to the new meds! the only reason i picked up a hpt was because my (.) (.) were soooo sore and was becoming constantly tired, i can remember just not having the energy to paint dd's room and just collapsing in a heap on the floor! 

not long after i found out he moved round and started kicking and wrigging around etc so i would ponder how someone could not know until they gave birth but can understand at the same time if you know what i mean?

p.s i also dont think its a case of the women endangering her child, like somebody else said if we are gonna make her take the wrap for not knowing maybe we should start also with the women who deliberately carrying on smoking and drinking whilst pg too.

fairydreams :flower:


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## orange-sox

My question is, if it was so darn obvious to the couple in questions family that the mother was again pregnant, why did the family wait till after the baby was born to approach the subject? If that was a member of my family I wouldve got off my high horse, offered my support and got them whatever care thy needed!


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