# Dummy/Soother dunking?



## LoisP

I'm currently living with my parents, and they're try to take over so much, but the worst thing is, I can't say anything, every time I do my mum just says 'Oh because having 4 kids isn't experience enough?' or they get in a stress and say i'm too paranoid, and i'm sheltering Shaun too much...etc
Anyways, they've got into this habit of dunking his dummy/soother into everything :S marmalade, gravy, tea... anything thats not solid, his dummy is dunked in, and put in his mouth.
Is this safe for a 1 month old?


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## _laura

I wouldn't have said it's fine as babies stomachs can't handle much at that early an age. 
Just tell your mum straight that if she doesn't let you do it then you'll never learn how to be a parent and cope when you and ben move out!


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## xx~Lor~xx

I don't use and never have used dummies. But no, I certainly wouldn't have thought that it is safe of a baby that age to have so many different things put in their mouth :/ It means he's having all sorts of sugars and salts that he certainly shouldn't be having. His stomach will be far too underdeveloped, I would have thought.

You need to have a straight talk with your family. So what if your mum brought up four kids and has experience? YOU are Sean's mum! YOU should have final say, end of. 

xoxox


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## ~RedLily~

^WSS
There is a lot of sugar/salt etc in those sorts of things.


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## x__amour

Oh no, I wouldn't agree with dipping his pacifier into foods and such, his little tummy just isn't ready for that, he should really only be having formula/breast milk, I'm not even sure when they're allowed to have small sips of water. I think Lois you need to kindly tell your mom in the nicest way to back off. Shaun is your child, not hers. My mom does the exact same thing and does the, "Well I had 6 children, so I know more than you." Your mom needs to let go and let you learn on your own, this whole first baby thing is supposed to be a leaning process for us but how are we supposed to learn if everyone is trying to do everything for us? Just try nicely talking to your mom and try and make her understand, like you said, she had 4 babies, she had her time now this is YOUR baby and you need YOUR time, she had hers. Not saying she has to stop helping or anything but there's a difference between helping and taking over. You're a great mom and she needs to see that and let YOU be parent, not her. :hugs:


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## LoisP

See I did think it wasn't good for him, 4 kids makes you know everything? I think not. Will talk to her tonight.


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## Youngling

Alot of things have changed since then.
OH's mum once dipped jack's dummy in custard ( without even asking) I was fuming!!
I would def let her know ur not happy with it. At the end of the day hes ur baby
x


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## sarah0108

I agree with everyone else, Even though Maxie can eat food now id still be annoyed if people dunk his dummy in anything :nope:

:hugs: hope the talk goes well x


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## Sarah10

Good luck hun :) yep loads of things change over the years xxx


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## LoisP

thanks girls i should of been braver and said something at the time, feel like a bad mum now, letting my own fear of arguments come over the health of my baby :(


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## Sarah10

Aw no that doesn't make you a bad mum hun, xxxx


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## sarah0108

Your not a bad mum hun! it is hard when people you love try to take over, you dont want to hurt their feelings even though you need to be in control IYSWIM?x


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## shelx

no its not safe. theres a reccommended food age for babies for a reason! as some other people have said their litte stomachs cant handle the strong taste of some things. just tell your mother and father youre not happy with them doing it. they should respect your decision. my sons just over one and my parents still ask if they can give them such foods. its your decision what she eats and doesnt, when and when not. make sure and make it clear to them that youre not happy xx


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## rainbows_x

Noo, definitely put your foot down, as that's really not good. :hugs:

I'm being pressured into weaning early, she's feeding up to 45oz's a day but I don't fel she's ready. Don't do anything you aren't comfortable with, he's your son.
Also once babies get teeth, dunking dummy's into anything (calpol, etc) can actually rot their teeth.


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## JessicaAnne

It doesnt make you a bad mum :)
OH's mum dunked Evie's dummy in WHISKEY, just because she was grizzly from teething :growlmad:


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## stephx

Your not a bad mum but seriously, tell them to back off. 

It's not just that his tummy isn't ready for it, theres just no need for it, I'm sure no 1 month old is interested in anything but milk. 

I get so much pressure to start weaning cause 'she wants to taste something different' :wacko: shes never tasted anything so IMO she can't miss what she's never had :shrug:

Xx


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## divershona

You're definately not a bad mum lois. You didn't feel it was right and checked and are now sorting it out so that's all that matters.

My gran used to put honey onto my mum's dummy because it would shut her up, all her first set of teeth came through rotten so its definately not good to be giving a baby sugary things.


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## GypsyDancer

God no! not at one month..
OH's dad is always asking if Zach wants a biscuit to suck on when we go round..NO he's only 3 months geeze he'd choke on it
having said that..i have to give zach a small spoon of apple puree before each feed for his medicine have done since he was around 3-4 weeks.. but the nurses say it has to be 100% pure apple no sugar no milk nothing added extra

BTW it doesnt make you a bad mum, you knew to question it..and its so difficult with parents when they try to take over and you feel you cant say anything..im useless and asking for zach back when oh's parents have got him..i just sit waiting for him back..


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## Rhio92

GypsyDancer said:


> its so difficult with parents when they try to take over and you feel you cant say anything..im useless and asking for zach back when oh's parents have got him..i just sit waiting for him back..

Ditto! I don't even ask my own Mum, let alone OH's... :nope:
You're defo not a bad Mum, Lois. It's hard living with parents, they only try to help, but things have changed, and they need your permission xxx


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## LoisP

Thank you everyone, I spoke to my mum about it last night and she apologised for not asking whether it was ok with me, and said she wont do it again xxx


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## KiansMummy

I live with my mum and dad to, and my dad is the exact same but instead of the dummy its his finger he puts in LO's mouth. Ive told him now that i don't want him doing it cos its not good and since i spoke to him he hasnt done it. Just tell them he's your child xx


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## GypsyDancer

KiansMummy said:


> I live with my mum and dad to, and my dad is the exact same but instead of the dummy its his finger he puts in LO's mouth. Ive told him now that i don't want him doing it cos its not good and since i spoke to him he hasnt done it. Just tell them he's your child xx

Oh yeah i hatee people putting their fingers in his mouth too! It makes me cringe so much..you just never know what people have been touching ect..


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## xx~Lor~xx

LoisP said:


> Thank you everyone, I spoke to my mum about it last night and she apologised for not asking whether it was ok with me, and said she wont do it again xxx

:thumbup: Well done! And I'm really glad to hear that she's respecting your wishes now, just make sure it stays like that :)

xoxox


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## Rhio92

So glad it's sorted now :hugs2: xxx


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## annawrigley

Aw you're definitely not a bad mum! Glad she's said she'll stop doing it, its really not good, like others have said their little tummies just arent ready yet. He's only tiny still! And apart from anything he may get used to it and refuse his dummy unless its got something on it xxx



x__amour said:


> Oh no, I wouldn't agree with dipping his pacifier into foods and such, his little tummy just isn't ready for that, he should really only be having formula/breast milk, *I'm not even sure when they're allowed to have small sips of water. *I think Lois you need to kindly tell your mom in the nicest way to back off. Shaun is your child, not hers. My mom does the exact same thing and does the, "Well I had 6 children, so I know more than you." Your mom needs to let go and let you learn on your own, this whole first baby thing is supposed to be a leaning process for us but how are we supposed to learn if everyone is trying to do everything for us? Just try nicely talking to your mom and try and make her understand, like you said, she had 4 babies, she had her time now this is YOUR baby and you need YOUR time, she had hers. Not saying she has to stop helping or anything but there's a difference between helping and taking over. You're a great mom and she needs to see that and let YOU be parent, not her. :hugs:

They can have water from birth x


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## bbyno1

My mum and nan are always wanting to do things like that but i really don't see the point! They think they are giving Aliyah some kind of treat when if anything it will do her more harm than good..
I wish people just wouldn't get involved in how or when or what Aliyah gets fed x


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## x__amour

annawrigley said:


> Aw you're definitely not a bad mum! Glad she's said she'll stop doing it, its really not good, like others have said their little tummies just arent ready yet. He's only tiny still! And apart from anything he may get used to it and refuse his dummy unless its got something on it xxx
> 
> 
> 
> x__amour said:
> 
> 
> Oh no, I wouldn't agree with dipping his pacifier into foods and such, his little tummy just isn't ready for that, he should really only be having formula/breast milk, *I'm not even sure when they're allowed to have small sips of water. *I think Lois you need to kindly tell your mom in the nicest way to back off. Shaun is your child, not hers. My mom does the exact same thing and does the, "Well I had 6 children, so I know more than you." Your mom needs to let go and let you learn on your own, this whole first baby thing is supposed to be a leaning process for us but how are we supposed to learn if everyone is trying to do everything for us? Just try nicely talking to your mom and try and make her understand, like you said, she had 4 babies, she had her time now this is YOUR baby and you need YOUR time, she had hers. Not saying she has to stop helping or anything but there's a difference between helping and taking over. You're a great mom and she needs to see that and let YOU be parent, not her. :hugs:
> 
> They can have water from birth xClick to expand...

Thanks Anna! I had no idea when it was okay, lol.


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## _laura

yeah if max hasnt done a poo in a while we give him a bit of water as it clears him out pretty well! (as in fills 3 nappies well :haha:)


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## Mellie1988

Ugh my mum and Grandma used to do this, like we would go for a coffee somewhere and they would dip LOs dummy in the froth off a cappuccino?! Makes me so mad, or like a bit of cream from a cake or something....then make ME feel guilty for "depriving" my baby of food....they were like 8/9 weeks old for god sakee! Arghh yes it really used to get me mad! 

I'm glad you spoke to your mum, I really hope she respects your wishes.... :nope: 

:hugs: 

x


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## annawrigley

Mellie1988 said:


> Ugh my mum and Grandma used to do this, like we would go for a coffee somewhere and they would dip LOs dummy in the froth off a cappuccino?! Makes me so mad, or like a bit of cream from a cake or something....*then make ME feel guilty for "depriving" my baby of food*....they were like 8/9 weeks old for god sakee! Arghh yes it really used to get me mad!
> 
> I'm glad you spoke to your mum, I really hope she respects your wishes.... :nope:
> 
> :hugs:
> 
> x

Grr, FOB's mum used to do this about weaning from when he was about 3 months, made me so angry. If I ever ate in front of him she'd go "nasty mummy! give him some!" ermmmmmmmm , no. I tried him with food the day he turned 4 months because of all the pressure from her (wish i'd not now :(), he wasnt ready at all so i left it til 5.5 months and he was so much better, wish i'd just waited in the first place! Lol bit of a life story here! :haha: xx


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## aob1013

Absolutely not safe, that must stop immediately!


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