# Drinking alcohol and TTC



## SydneyB

Hi Ladies,

I have read loads about what you should and shouldn't do when TTC especially when you are over 35. God if we followed all the advice life would be pretty boring!! I do like the odd glass of wine - maybe once a week 3-4 glasses but recently I have been wondering if I should cut it out completely. I would find this hard but if it would help then I'm willing to try. Has anyone else got any thoughts on this and also what about the hubby - god if we both stopped I think we would go mad!! Does it really affect things that much? When I had my MC I put it down to drinking ( I know I shouldn't blame that alone as it could have been many other reasons) but at the time I was taking a couple of months away from home traveling with my hubby while he was working away and it turned into more of a holiday - hence drinking most nights right up until I took my pregnancy test. Then obviously stopped completely. I don't drink as often as I used to but would just like to hear other peoples thoughts on the matter.


----------



## vickyd

Syd i also had this worry, drinking while ttc. I have discussed this with my doc and he says that there is no reason that i shouldnt drink socially. I think we tend to overanalyze these things hun, and youre right what kind of life would we have if gave everything up while ttc... Also your drinking did not cause your miscarriage!!! Please dont add additional worries to an already stressful journey!


----------



## twinkle1975

DH & I have both tried to cut it out altogether - doesn't bother me that much as I'm normally driving (DH doesn't drive) - but I think it was getting him down when he went to watch the football or something & couldn't have a pint so we've said he can have one & then he doesn't feel like he's missing out - don't want to make him miserable! I've decided if I get a real yearning for something - like Pimms or Mead - I'll have one - my dr also said it wouldn't be a problem - he reckons all 4 of his kids should be named after different sorts of wine!


----------



## HappyAuntie

My dr, too, told me that anything I drank before implantation had absolutely zero effect on the baby (with my 2nd pregnancy, I cut loose one night with the girls during the TWW). I don't generally drink much - maybe 1-2 glasses of wine per week - so it's not a huge deal anyway. But also, for me, continuing to have a glass of wine now and then is just another way of keeping my sanity and not letting TTC control my every waking thought!

Specifically related to mc's... with my 1st pregnancy, I did absolutely everything you're "supposed" to do, and I lost the baby. With my second, I took a more philosophical approach - I had learned from the 1st that you can do everything "right" and still have it go horribly wrong anyway, so with the 2nd I knew that outside of taking my vitamins and cutting out that glass of wine, the rest was out of my control anyway. Still with both, it was impossible to ignore the what-ifs and the guilt. But try not to let it get the better of you, Syd. :hugs: Now go have a glass of wine! :wine:


----------



## heart tree

With my first pregnancy, I was laid back and had drinks every now and again while ttc. I had a mc. So then I cut out alcohol all together ttc my last pregnancy and had a mc. This time, I decided that I like having a glass of wine every now and again. I even had some during my 2ww and just got my BFP. I'm not going to stress about it. I'm just going to stop drinking from this point forward and hope that this one sticks. Unless you are a heavy drinker, I really don't see the harm. We all need to live a little!


----------



## SydneyB

Thanks ladies. Maybe I won't feel as guilty now when I have the odd glass. Got to have something to enjoy when I go out with the girls for a meal and they are telling me all about what their lovely children have been up to!!! :winkwink:


----------



## Jolinar

I think the more relaxed you are the better, it that means a glass or two of wine of an evening then it won't do any harm. I did this in the tww when I was pregnant with Nic, he's fine bright as a button. Life doesn't end when you're ttc :D


----------



## heart tree

Oh Jolinar, that gives me such hope to hear! 

Syd, you definitely need wine when your friends are talking about their kids or pregnancies!!! Drink up, you'll be fine!


----------



## Rikki

The worst time to drink is around the time your period is due, as this is when gastrulation takes place (when the fertilised egg forms the mesodermal layer). Drinking can prevent this happening and result in miscarriage. Sorry - all sounds a bit technical. Before this though, it shouldn't have any effect.


----------



## June_Sprite74

With my first (aged 20) I didn't know I was pregnant until 15 weeks and right up until the positive result was nightclubbing, smoking and drinking. When I found out I obviously stopped but never gave it a second thought (young and stupid). The baby was fine and still is a healthy 13 year old. With my second I drank in moderation until conception time or thereabouts and stopped smoking. Baby turned out fine too and is now a healthy 8 year old. Last pregnancy ended on June 21st after 10 weeks. Prior to that and 3 months leading to conception I took multi-vitamins, no alcohol, no dodgy foods, gave up smoking 4 years ago anyway so didn't have that to worry about, and it ended in a m/c. I think I stressed and worried and flapped more on this last pregnancy than with both the others put together. Next time I get my BFP I'm not going to google everything, try to chill more and not be so demanding on myself.


----------



## heart tree

June, thanks for that. It makes me feel better as I've had a few glasses of wine in the 2ww before I got my BFP. I'm so very sorry about your recent loss.


----------



## magicvw

How many young girls get pregnant because they are piss-heads out partying all the time and shagging around? Many! I think it's much more important to be relaxed about life than to be giving up everything you enjoy. As long as you are not getting sloshed and are within the sensible limits then I don't think you should worry. I also drank while pregnant both times, except in the first tri from BFP onwards and not for the last few weeks. I had 1 small glass of wine with my evening meal - I don't think it can do any harm.


----------



## mumoffive

There are probably hundreds of people that get blind drunk with absolutely no idea they are pregnant lol!! Personally, i am not stopping doing anything except maybe hayfever tablets or painkillers. I dont drink anway..because i dont really like it! but would continue to have a glass if its what i wanted to do..on the other hand i love coffee and refuse to let ttc take over my life. x


----------



## ArticBaby

I usually have a glass of wine, or a lite beer before my 2ww. Not much of a alcohol drinker.


----------



## ASTERO

I usually drink 1-2 glasses of wine during the week. My doc told me that it's not bad while TTC. 
And while pregnant with my DD, he told me to drink 1-2 (!) glasses of RED wine per week with lunch/dinner because it's good for the placenta!


----------



## wannabemum123

You can still drink wine as plenty of research indicates women who drink wine (I suspect red), fall pg quicker than those that don't. Red wine is extremely good for you anyway. Don't go overboard tho. Go on google and you will see some articles regarding.


----------



## 086marian

LOVE THAT :wine:

I so wanted to ask this question but I was terrified a few people would say OMG your not fit to be a mother your a disgrace drinking while TTC!!!!!

Phew...... You lifted the world of weight off my shoulders...:happydance::thumbup:

Heres to babies.... :baby::dance:

Besides I bet a lot more :sex: goes on after a few glasses of wine!!!! :winkwink:

:hug: and :dust: to everyone.


----------



## HappyAuntie

I met with my rmc specialist yesterday and asked him about sushi - he said he wishes more people would eat it! That it's the absolute freshest fish that you can buy and it's safer than eating deli meats. I have to admit I did a little happy dance when he told me that. :happydance: I also came home and did a little "told you so" when I passed that along to DH - I won't have to sneak it with my next pregnancy! :happydance:


----------



## heart tree

Don't you just love little small miracles like that? YAY for you and your sushi!!!


----------



## wannabemum123

Here is one article, I referred to above. https://www.bmj.com/cgi/content/extract/327/7413/468-c


----------



## magicvw

086marian said:


> Besides I bet a lot more :sex: goes on after a few glasses of wine!!!! :winkwink:

hear hear to that!! :wine: Me too. :D


----------



## Alexina

Hi everyone,

I tried not drinking and cutting out caffine for the first two months of ttc and it just made me even more stressed and I was so moody it was like having PMT, so this month I have reverted back to normal with a few glasses of wine and I feel so much more relaxed so for me this is definately the way forward, as they say the more you deprive yourself of something the more you want it.


----------



## bdwell1904

Wannabe liked the article thnx... I have also heard fats such as real butter instead of margarine help?


----------



## wannabemum123

bdwell1904 said:


> Wannabe liked the article thnx... I have also heard fats such as real butter instead of margarine help?

The beauty of red wine beside it being good for you is that it also helps relax you, which is very much needed when you have the stresses of TTC.


----------



## Omi

I have mentioned this a hundred times before in other posts but here it goes again - i got a bfp 6 on jan ( 2008) and was obviously a nervous wreck what with it having been xmas and new years. Asked GP who said not to worry as embryo lives off 'period' until week 5 when it starts to hook into your blood supply. That blood has been filtered by your liver and therefore poses no harm to baby (only you :)). After that, obviously, anything and everything you eat, drink and breathe goes straight into your bloodstream and to your baby. 

In conclusion, particularly for long term ttc, a little cheeky glass now and then is gonna do more good than harm. As with everything moderation is the key! :)

:wine: Enjoy!


----------



## magicvw

Nice one Omi! :hugs:


----------



## SydneyB

Well thank you all for all your words of wisdom - my hubby works away A LOT and is home soon after 3 months away - I have tried to cut down while he has been away and I think I've only had a couple of glasses a week but when he gets home I know the levels will increase ( after his 3 months of stress we both need a drink - we are going away for a while as well to chill out!!). I will take all your knowledge/feelings on board when we give it a go in August. Some times I read all your posts and think how lucky you all are to even get the opportunity to try each month!!! Good luck to you all and wish me luck for August and maybe September it may be the only 2 opportunities we get this year to try!!!!!!!!!!!!!:winkwink:


----------



## eeyore2911

people can go overboard trying to banish all the fun from your life.... i spoke to nurse recently about ttc (i am also a nurse but she didn't know that) and she was all ooh the DoH forbid any alcohol for anyone ttc as well as while pregnant etc etc.. i think they do try to sacre the bejeesus out of you and is not fair. What if i was ttc for a couple of years? I mean really, do some people have no sense? i am obviously not advocating going out getting blotto every night but the odd glass is surely one teeny pleasure we should not be denied at every turn? :(


----------



## HappyDaze

I'm with you - people who say you shouldn't drink alcohol and caffeine while TTC havent' been through 2 years TTC and fertility treatment! It was stressful enough without denying myself all my pleasures in life! I generally tried to cut down in the 2WW, but seriously - putting your life on hold for 2 weeks a month for 2 years?? I think if you let TTC take over your life too much you are just putting too much additional pressure on your health/relationship etc. How many women have you seen who just get paranoid about everything - it completely takes over their lives, it can't be fun. I say chill out and enjoy life :) 
Obviously since I got my BFP I haven't touched a drop...


----------



## CedarWood

I agree that a cup of coffee once a day or a glass or two of wine a few times a week is ok. I used to be more paranoid about coffee etc but as the years went by I realised I had no coffee in the TWW and no baby so allow myself that pleasure:thumbup:
I agree about the early stages and the developing embryo is not absorbing from the mother but think the point about right around AF is important, if it could cause failed implantation. There is no definite but if it is a risk, I would skip the days around AF. Also be careful to limit your drinks before OVulation when the eggs are developing, as too much alcohol can damage them - we all want the best eggies:flower:


----------



## Omi

Just wanted to point out that eggs are actually maturing 3 months prior to ovulation therefore if you were really serious about the above point you would have to not drink at all for the entire ttc period - which as pointed out, would be a big bummer if you're a LTTC'er :) Same actually applies to men, new sperm takes 3 months too.

I think the best point that has been made repeatedly is to do everything in moderation. I also think its fair to say that a glass of wine is not gonna stop implantation, which btw also happens a few days before af ( usually cd 9 but anywhere between cd 6-12 ) therefore you might not be so lucky to know when it happens and thus again, no drinking.

Im happy to agree to disagree but i can also understand the need to be cautious however, i think for a lot of us, having done this for a long time you sort of end up picking and choosing what is best for you and what you're willing to to and not do, iukwim?

All the best though, hun :)


----------



## magicvw

eeyore2911 said:


> people can go overboard trying to banish all the fun from your life.... i spoke to nurse recently about ttc (i am also a nurse but she didn't know that) and she was all ooh the DoH forbid any alcohol for anyone ttc as well as while pregnant etc etc.. i think they do try to sacre the bejeesus out of you and is not fair. What if i was ttc for a couple of years? I mean really, do some people have no sense? i am obviously not advocating going out getting blotto every night but the odd glass is surely one teeny pleasure we should not be denied at every turn? :(

I think the DoH thing comes from erring on the side of caution. No one can know for sure that a little alcohol does no harm without properly regulated tests. In order to find out what the safe limit was, they would have to rig up some kind of test in which pregnant women were given measured quantities of alcohol and then the no. of miscarriages or birth defects measured against a control group who abstained. Clearly it's totally immoral and unthinkable to do any testing like this. Whenever the DoH has no data and there is even a glimmer of a possibility that there could be a bad side effect they seem to go for an all out "ban". It's the same with OTC drugs that you should or shouldn't take when preggo - as a hayfever sufferer I was in a terrible state not taking my antihistamines until a doctor friend of mine suggested that the chances of anything happening were so slim I'd be more likely to be abducted by aliens, so I started taking them. They don't test this stuff, so they just say no because if they said "yes in moderation" and something went wrong they would have a law case or 100 on their hands.


----------

