# Worried about eating at school!



## CaptainMummy

Ella will be starting school in August. I am not worried about it in the slightest, apart from lunchtime. The kids in p1-3 get free school meals.There is absolutely nothing on the school menu she will eat. There is no sort of sandwich or wrap or pasta or anything at all really that she would eat in a packed lunch.

She will not 'eat when she sees everyone else eating' nor will she 'eat if she is hungry.' 100% certain she would starve herself over eating something she doesn't like. There are 3 hot things she will eat - toasted bagel (won't eat a cold one) Scotch pie and boxed macaroni. Not healthy in the slightest but it's literally all she will go near. 
She has a big breakfast, will eat a variety of cereal, toast, yoghurts, fruit, porridge... but that's about as much as she eats. 

Help a worried mummy out! Either miracle ways to get her to eat, or packed lunch ideas that would work and aren't completely junk! (if that's even possible her very limited food choices!)


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## SarahBear

Are there any healthy snacks she'll eat? I'd say load her up on food in the morning, send her with healthy snacks, and eventually she'll figure out how to get through or she'll crack and eat something. As long as her total calorie intake is good, I wouldn't stress too much.

Edit: If she'll eat fruit and yogurt, why not just send that?

Also, have you asked her for ideas of what to pack?


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## LoraLoo

Ask school if theyll do her some toast? At our school theyll make toast for kids that have forgotten their packed lunch ir forgot to order dinner, then send in a big fruit salad and yogurt? It's worth asking.
If they won't, could you make her a bagel or pie or the macaroni in the morning and put it in an insulated lunch bag? 
Worst came to it you could always fetch her home if that's a possibility and you felt it necessary?


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## CaptainMummy

Thanks, I don't think they do toast, and home lunch definitely isn't an option as I don't drive. Would a good lunch bag keep them warm? I hadn't considered that, as I've never actually done it before, but that would definitely be an option for some days. 

I have asked her what she would have in her packed lunch, she said 
a butter sandwich haha (she doesn't actually like bread and butter so that wouldn't get eaten) jelly, fruit, yoghurt drink, smoothie, dry cereal, and of course a biscuit or cake for after... I suppose it would be an okay lunch now that I look at what I wrote, could definitely be worse.. and she would probably quite enjoy it, but I would just feel bad sending her with that every day and scared in case she never got enough time to eat it all and was still hungry. 

She does eat plenty of what she likes, so as long as she is happy with what she has in front of her, then I suppose it doesn't matter if its not a super healthy, filling, big meal. Thanks ladies!


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## LoraLoo

I'd probably do a trial run at home to see if it keeps warm? 
I think the things you listed sound ok though! I help at school and some kids on dinners have one mouthful and then go straight to pudding, so if she eats what you put in for her then I think she will be fine :)


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## BabyGirl999

Does she like soup or beans? You can put that sort of stuff in a flask.


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## lau86

I haven't dealt with such a restricted diet but here they offer meals and jacket potato, salad bar for lunch. I'm a mean mummy and would say you eat it or you don't, your choice! She can have a big breakfast and tea after all.


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## CaptainMummy

lau86 said:


> I haven't dealt with such a restricted diet but here they offer meals and jacket potato, salad bar for lunch. I'm a mean mummy and would say you eat it or you don't, your choice! She can have a big breakfast and tea after all.

they do that sort of thing at dds school too. Every day there are 2 hot meals and 2 cold meals (sandwiches/pasta pots etc) to choose from, not one thing that she will eat... but I don't think it would be fair to send her knowing that she wouldn't eat it. And telling her that she has no choice won't make any difference. I think it would be cruel sending such a young child to school for 6hrs every day knowing they would be having no lunch


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## lau86

No I agree, it's not ideal. But if there is no medical reason why she can't eat it, surely part of the reason she doesn't eat certain things is because she isn't really that hungry? Also they do give a snack mid morning at our school


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## Zephram

lau86 said:


> No I agree, it's not ideal. But if there is no medical reason why she can't eat it, surely part of the reason she doesn't eat certain things is because she isn't really that hungry? Also they do give a snack mid morning at our school

Would agree with this. I really cant see any kid sitting there not eating anything at all, like not even ONE bite, every single day at lunch. She might be fussy, but if shes always just had access to things she prefers at home then shes had no chance to branch out and obviously hasnt had to. 

Personally I would try her out and see how she goes. I think making a big deal out of it as her parent will encourage her to view the lunch choices as something she wont like. Id just tell her theyll give her lunch and itll be yummy - Im big about framing stuff positively!


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## pa2k84

Hard one. I think I would just give a big breakfast and send work a morning snack (assuming allowed) and make sure I do a big evening meal. She may one day surprise you and eat or always come home hungry but I guess in the long run that's just decision, food is provided so very choice to eat or not.
Do you know for certain she won't eat it? Having worked in schools/nurseries/pre schools myself it's amazing how many parents are amazed at what their children eat as they won't touch the same at home. Even witnessed myself with my oldest happily eating a meal at nursery I had previously warned them about as it was something he would not even contemplate at home and he ate thirds!!


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## CaptainMummy

Honestly, I am 100% certain she would sit and eat nothing if she was a school lunch every day. She hasn't tried new things at nursery, even though they assured me 'she will eat when she sees the other children eating' but are always telling me that her eating is not good at all.
They do get a snack at break time, but it makes me sad to think she would be sitting at lunch, whilst all of her friends eat, and she wouldn't be able to eat anything, and I'm not really prepared to do that to her. 
They do have a day before they start school that parents come in and have school lunch with the kids, and hopefully she will have improved a bit before the summer, but with her track record, it is highly unlikely!


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## Rags

Ds, 7, has always brought more of his packed lunch home than he eats at school - he's just not hungry at that time of day. He has a good breakfast and I've now taken to sending him with crackers and cheese as it's not as obvious to the teachers how much he's eaten - they would try to encourage him when he had sandwiches as it was obvious if he'd only had a bite, this would make him uncomfortable and a bit upset.
You can pick up a food flask at most supermarkets, they wont keep the food pipping hot but they've a wider opening than an ordinary flask so your daughter could eat straight out of one.


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## Rainbow82

A food flask should keep something like macaroni cheese if not piping hot then at least warm enough for her to eat. Or maybe dry cereal and a little bottle of milk to tip in? My friends little one had similar issues with food and school were awful at not allowing kids what they considered junk in their lunch boxes. She ended up getting a referral to a dietician from the gp to help her LO with trying new foods etc and also got a note from the gp explaining that it was a problem the child had been referred for and that the child needed to eat what was supplied. Lunchbox now consists of cold chicken nuggets and ketchup. The dietician is helping though and her LO is getting better at trying new foods and textures. Just an option if you find the school dont want to cooperate.


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## housewifey

I work in a school and that includes in the much hall every day so see a lot of kids eat lunch every week. Imo if your not happy to send her to school for free school meals knowing she wont eat it, then dont. Make her a packed lunch of whatever shell be happy to munch on and shell eat if shes hungry. At least options are there for her that she likes. Unless the school has a strict junk food policy like the previous poster then send whatever you want. Ive seen Nutella sandwiches, cold potato scones, gummy sweeties, butter sandwiches, etc! Some of it isnt exactly lunch but to me as long as theyre eating, Im happy. It would only be a concern if a child was sent every day with pot noodles or mouldy bread etc. X


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## biglebowski

I would definitely think of going the packed lunch route if I were you. Does she like sandwiches / wraps / crackers / oatcakes? They can be filled with cheese or cold meat. Also you can pack in a yoghurt, smoothie, chopped fruit or veg. Ive seen lo's at my sons school with cocktail sausages and little sausage rolls. If you want to send soup or mac n cheese a heated flask would keep food warm. We used to send our son to nursery with home made soup. It wasnt boiling hot by the time he had it, but was just nice temp for eating when he had it. We used to pour boiling water in and leave it for a bit before emptying and adding his food. Preheating the flask made all the difference. 
It is such a stress if you are worried about her eating. Will she have a morning snack, and does school offer milk? My sons school make the kids bring home what they dont eat so its a great way to see whats a hit and whats not. 
Our sons a great eater but at school hes so excited to go and play he will leave some stuff to race out with pals. We spoke to school about it as we had a week of him eating very little (sooo unlike him). Teachers were great at positively supporting him to make better choices!! Its so important they have some food as its such a long busy day. Our lo was such a grump when he wasnt eating well, his concentration must have been so poor. 
Our lo's school has 1 dining hall so all the kids mingle whether they have school or packed lunch. He ended up asking for school lunches. We tend to only let him have it once or twice a week. Left to his own devices he wont eat veg and have a pud (not something Im keen on). But we dont see any harm in small doses and he sees it as a treat as he picks the pizza or mac n cheese days to have a school meal. 
Maybe start with packed lunches and discuss with her whether she wants to try a school meal. Can she opt in and out of school meals. Our lo can chop and change anytime, and we have the 3 week meal planner so we know if he has a school meal its something he enjoys.


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## clio

I supervise lunch at my son's school daily. If she likes mac and cheese, then you can put it warm into a thermos like this: 

https://www.amazon.ca/Thermos-Funtainer-Ounce-Food-Purple/dp/B00CBFAE5I

All the kids have them (it's all packed lunches here).


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## CaptainMummy

Thanks everyone, I'll definitely look into sending hot food with her. She can choose to go packed lunch/school meal each day, they have a 3 week menu, with different options each day. The school also seems quite lenient when it comes to whay the kids bring in to eat (they have no restrictions as far as I'm aware)

Biglebowski, she doesn't like any of those things you listed, which is why I worry that even a packed lunch wouldn't really be much of a meal for her, she doesn't eat any meat at all (apart from a pie but she tends to eat only the pastry)

Yes, they can bring a snack for break time (mid morning) and they can buy milk at lunchtime too. I know she won't starve but she would definitely be upset if she had nothing to eat, but it seems like a packed lunch of things I know she will eat is the best option. Can always put in different things in case she decides to try. Of course I hope she broadens her choices and would be absolutely thrilled if she proved me wrong and actually started to eat some new things, but as it stands, she is set in her ways and won't give anything a chance.


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## Dolly84

Im in the exact same boat, my son (4) eats really well and is currently in reception enjoying school meals, my daughter (2) starts school nursery in September and is a restrictive eater too, she eats 16 different food items but none of which would be classed as a meal at school, she wont try pizza, Shepards pie, chicken roast dinner, pretty much most normal meals! Weve tried everything, encouragement, sticker charts, letting her get really hungry, we always offer new foods on her plate with some familiar food she likes too so she at least eats something but she wont eat any new foods! She eats with her brother at meal times at home so its not like she isnt seeing somebody enjoy the food were trying for her to eat. Im following this thread for some ideas because Im all out. Oh and apparently in nursery and reception in our school they dont allow children to bring in packed lunch because they say they havnt got the facilities &#128546; so shes stuck with school dinners unfortunately!


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## Button#

We had the same problem with DS. He has a very restricted diet and when he was in pre school the only thing he would eat was peanut butter sandwiches and the bread had to be toasted. Obviously school is nut free. We had a lot of trial and error but eventually got to the point where he was having pizza or cheese spread sandwiches in his packed lunch. While we were going through this I made sure he had snacky bits in his lunch box, crackers, fruit, yoghurt etc so he had something he could eat and he was given bread and butter a couple of times by the lunch staff. 

I wouldnt go for school dinners if she definitely wont eat anything as I think the experience of going up to get their lunch can be a bit daunting for some children and needs to be got past and if they then dont like the food it will be extra difficult for them.


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## noon_child

My daughter has tried lots of food she said she didn't like because of her friends eating it at school, so exposure to school meals can be useful in widening a child's diet. However when they are away all day without you knowing if they are eating or not it's really stressful, so maybe you would feel better trying to expand her diet slowly with packed lunches and move to school meals when you feel more secure (or if she shows interest). Does she eat pizza, raw veg sticks, crackers and cheese, tuna and sweetcorn, anything like that? I think her suggestions for packed lunch are fine in moderation but Jelly AND cereal AND cake or biscuit is a lot of sugar for one meal. Maybe pair a small amount of what she will eat with a small amount of something she might or might not eat. I think you can get cold food recipe books or online ideas and maybe if she picks some from the pictures and helps you make it she'll be more likely to try it?


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## CaptainMummy

Thanks, I'm aware it's all quite sweet, and I'm racking my brains trying to think of things! She wouldn't eat any of the things you mentioned, although she did used to have crackers with butter so might see if she will still eat those. I wouldn't give her too many sugary things all together, and you can get pots of sugar free jelly, so it could definitely be worse but not ideal! I just gave dd2&3 a packed lunch for their lunch. 4yr olds containes a dairylea dunker (not exactly nutritious but it's savoury and she is actually eating it) grapes, a yoghurt and a carton of orange juice. It seems to be a hit so hopefully get her to eat a few other bits and pieces so she isn't stuck with the same thing every day, and at least she will be able to take a satisfactory packed lunch.


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## susan7880

For a picky eater,try out the Japanese, lunch ideas. Stuff her lunch box with colorful fruits and make it look like her favorite cartoon character.


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