# why am I always the bad guy?????



## xxannxx

So, here goes the rant!!!
So my ex sees my LO every weekend, and thinks he's father of the year material, honestly believes that he puts LO first at all times, however every now and again (when the notion takes him) he will blow a situation out of all control and then go on to make me the bad guy.
This week my ex was to have LO for weekend, which was fine and arranged, and phoned earlier and happened to say that was planning on swimmers tomorrow. I told him that LO has cold, nose running, temperature, and as he has Asthma, I would rather he didn't go to swimmers as didn't want to chance his Asthma getting aggravated. He went completely ballistic, saying that its not up to me to decide this, that I can't lay down law to him, he'll do as he wants, that swimming was arranged and that was it. I said was not happy with swimming, and so he hung up, and when I rang back wouldn't answer. Finally, got him back on phone and explained my worries to him, he became abusive so told him that if I couldn't trust him to do right thing for his health then forget it. He has been bombarding me with txts and calls ever since, saying that I'm a bad mother who doesn't put my childs feelings first and am just being a vindictive b#####. 
Why do I always have to be the bad one? I am only doing what is best for LO wellbeing. In the last year I have been to hospital with him so many times during night with Asthma related problems and all I was asking was that he found something else to do with LO other than swimming for 1 week!!!


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## Serene123

I know it sucks, but your ex needs to learn from his own mistakes. I'm sure he wouldn't purposely want to make his asthma play up. Perhaps you mentioning it when he hadn't thought of it hurt him a little and made his defenses come up?


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## xxannxx

Would be nice to actually think that he had feelings to hurt, he may be annoyed that he hadn't thought of it himself though, as he did let slip that he had forgotton all about the Asthma, and didn't know that that would make difference to cold!!! Sometimes just can't believe him, he has absolutely no sense of responsilbility. Thats a job for us mums I guess!!!


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## DizzyMoo

xxannxx said:


> So, here goes the rant!!!
> So my ex sees my LO every weekend, and thinks he's father of the year material, honestly believes that he puts LO first at all times, however every now and again (when the notion takes him) he will blow a situation out of all control and then go on to make me the bad guy.
> This week my ex was to have LO for weekend, which was fine and arranged, and phoned earlier and happened to say that was planning on swimmers tomorrow. I told him that LO has cold, nose running, temperature, and as he has Asthma, I would rather he didn't go to swimmers as didn't want to chance his Asthma getting aggravated. He went completely ballistic, saying that its not up to me to decide this, that I can't lay down law to him, he'll do as he wants, that swimming was arranged and that was it. I said was not happy with swimming, and so he hung up, and when I rang back wouldn't answer. Finally, got him back on phone and explained my worries to him, he became abusive so told him that if I couldn't trust him to do right thing for his health then forget it. He has been bombarding me with txts and calls ever since, saying that I'm a bad mother who doesn't put my childs feelings first and am just being a vindictive b#####.
> Why do I always have to be the bad one? I am only doing what is best for LO wellbeing. In the last year I have been to hospital with him so many times during night with Asthma related problems and all I was asking was that he found something else to do with LO other than swimming for 1 week!!!

Hun i would of done the EXACT same thing as you, by saying i'd rather you didn't go swimming because of xyz reason, Then him going nuts i'd of said " fine you ain't having him til he's better then " As i couldn't trust he wouldn't go anyway if you get me. 
You aint the bad one & personally i don't think he got his back up just because he didn't think of his asthma etc, I think its because you were making him change his plans, kinda telling him what he can & cant do. 
Which is not what you were doing but to him it would of been & thats his own stupid fault for not putting his sons health 1st . Your the one who see's your lo through poorly times hun so just ignore him & carry on :) xxxxxxxxx


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