# I wish people would keep their opinions to themselves:(



## anniehannie

Hi all

I just wanted to share my bad experiences with ladies I know will understand x

Twice in one day I have been told I must be mad or stupid to be having a baby at 40!!!!! Only last week my DH nan (who admittedly is 90 years old) said on hearing our news - 'You're both too old to be having another child. Why did you do that for?'

I have been left feeling like a naughty school girl who has got herself pregnant. 

I wish people would keep their opinions to themselves!! I have been trying for another child for 7 years and having finally been blessed. 

Has anyone else had a similar experience?


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## DeeM73

Hiya!!! I have a funny feeling we will be going through the same thing this week :nope: OH is planning on telling his family this week,his dad knows and is over the moon but not sure how his kids will take it.My family will be ok about it but being honest couldn't care less it's our lives not theirs x


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## CeeDee

My grandmother said "You aren't going to have children are you?" after I called to tell her I was engaged at 33 years old. Mind you she had her first child at 29 and her last child at 38. It hurt a bit, but I learned my lesson to be prepared for negative comments. That's really been the only comment thus far. 

Sorry you had to experience that, all children are a blessing regardless of what age we are blessed with them.


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## Storm1jet2

People are just insensitive - ignore them and many many congratulations :hugs:


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## Andypanda6570

People are cruel and just plain rude :growlmad:
When I was pregnant with my Ava ( Sadly I lost her at 18 and half weeks in March and I was 40 ) I have to say people were wonderful to me, they would say what a blessing at 40 to be pregnant:hugs: I would get the occasional comment what are you crazy , you want to start all over again (*My boys are 20,17 and 11) and I would say yes I guess I am crazy because I would LOVE to start all over again.:cloud9::cloud9::cloud9::cloud9:
Just ignore the haters they will always be there and enjoy your beautiful gift..
XOXO All The Best :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## Nat0619

I think this is a case of the 'generation' thing with your OH's nan. In their day, everyone had probably had all their children by 30. It's nothing unusual these days to have children later and, like another poster said, every child is a blessing. It doesn't matter a jot how old the parents are! What matters is that the child is loved and wanted, which clearly yours definitely is.

Ignore them hun :hugs:


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## Torontogal

Congratulations, and sorry you're getting unkind comments 
Having another baby in life is a blessing, sad some people can't recognize that. Their loss!


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## vintage67

Unfortunately, this is common sometimes.

I am 44 and pregnant. We had our son 7 years ago and have been trying to give him a sibling for 4 years. We had 3 painful miscarriages. People can be very cruel. There are occassionally things said here on B&B that are just awful. When I was 20 or 23, I guess I thought 40 seemed ancient; I just don't remember. 

It is has been hard being pregnant. It got really hard for me around week 28 or so with extreme fatigue. I do not regret it all, and our son is so excited. It has been exciting, frightening, tiring, stressul and joyful, to be pregnant at this age!


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## SuperAwesome

People are just rude and thoughtless. I usually reply with something ridiculous or blatantly rude. Don't let them hurt your feelings; ultimately they don't matter (the other people, that is, not your feelings. :D )


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## SabrinaKat

Well, I'm 44 (baby conceived when I was 43) and have had few negative comments (I look younger, I suppose). In fact, this pregnancy -- aside from the tiredness -- seems to rather routine, I think, so far, so good. Personally, I think people who comment about age (in either direction) are pretty rude as it is only the mum/dad's business as long as baby is wanted/taken care of, etc., sigh.... harder when it's family, tho!

best wishes


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## JJBump1

Inasmuch as possible, you need to surround yourself with positive energy and minimize the effect that these people have on you! It's especially important that you put your health first right now!


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## SecondTimeMom

Yes...before I was even pregnant I told my aunt I wanted at least one more and she made a comment that she was surprised and she had a certain tone. I told her she knew that and she said that was before you had 4 kids (SO has 3 kids and I have one). I got really upset and cried about it! Then another day her friend also was telling me not to have more...wtf? This lady is the sweetest woman and she had 7 kids. My aunt had four. How dare they butt in and tell me how many I should have? Next time, I'll just say, I love you but it's my choice and I'm perfectly able to know if I can handle it or not! I could see a little bit if I had major issues in my life but I've worked to get to this point in my life and be able to afford to do this!


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## mommylam

I'm 37 will be 38 when the baby is born and thankfully I have had nothing negative like this happen! 

My 85 year old grandfather is excited about the baby and said that I wasn't too old and that I would be just fine to have another. I wasn't sure why he thought he needed to say that....but at least he wasn't rude to me like some of you ladies have had to deal with.

I've actually been seeing a lot of news and literature lately about women having babies later in life.....being a natural progression to the fact that people are living longer than ever before.

I had my 3rd son when I was 34 and I enjoyed that pregnancy and my time with him when he was a baby more than any other time before. I was older, wiser, calmer and just more settled. 

Boo to anyone that wants to be negative about such a blessing as a child!!!! They must be crazy for being so rude because as pregnant women and mothers.....we are blessed and truly thankful for the opportunities we are given!!!!


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## DeeM73

You are very lucky :) When my husband's kids were told one of them said is this the last one??!! Not congratulations but said that :cry: None of them have said congratulations or many of his family.His dad is over the moon :happydance: Our 2 kids are so happy too,along with my family and our friends :) People can be cruel and so hurtful at times xx


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## sadie

People often bring their own experiences to the table when making comments. For 90 yr old granny, she was probably having sex more as a duty, rather than as a desire. perhaps she is a bit bitter about it, never really wanting all of those children. Just a thought...

As the others say, its your life (mine too, i will be 42 this month and am due in June). Inore the idiots and enjoy your pregnancy!!


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## Dana_Scully

I think it's so ridiculous! I'm 25, and this is our first baby. We both agreed that we'd like to have a couple now, and one later in life. As long as you're not 70 and having a baby, it's all good. It would be neat, having your older children help with the baby.

I got the idea from reading For Better Or For Worse, the comic strip. Elly finds out she's pregnant at 43 and her kids are 10 and 15. The book is called "What, me pregnant?" It's an awesome book. :)


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## CeeDee

Dana_Scully, My sister, surprisingly went this route. She has a 17,12,4 and 1 year old. The older kids love taking care of and playing with the little kids.


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