# school dinner



## alicecooper

Picture the scenario :

the school dinners are fortnightly recurring, so week 1, week 3, week 5, week 7 etc. are the same meals for the week,
week 2, week 4, week 6, week 8 etc. are the same meals for the week.

So imagine one day on one of the weeks your kid doesn't like the choice of school dinner.

So basically once a fortnight they come home starving because they hate what's on offer.

(which just so happens to be a choice of lasagne or jacket potato, and your kid hates them both).

Now imagine your kid gets free school dinner, so if you were to send them to school with a packed lunch it would cost you (obviously).

Now imagine TWO of your kids (just imagine you have more than 1 kid!) is doing this. They both hate the lasagne and the jacket potato.

Therefore, once a fortnight, you have 2 kids coming home starving.

Do you 

a) provide them both with packed lunches once a fortnight, with the realisation you're not only having to buy food despite the fact that perfectly good free food is provided for them, and the other realisation that you, when you were in school, got what you were given and damned well ate it, because that's what our generation had, and you either liked it or lumped it, and none of this "picky eating" nonsense....

or

b) face the prospect of having your kids starving all day because you know damned well that they're not going to eat the lasagne or the jacket potato

?!


----------



## lovelylaura

I would give a pack lunch its twice a month. Surely it wouldn't cost that much, jam sandwiches are super cheap. I wouldn't be happy that my girls had to spend a whole school day without dinner.


----------



## Ummi2boyz

I wouldn't give them a pack lunch. If they come home starving, it's their own fault. Ok they don't really like what's on offer, but I believe that children need to understand most kids in the world don't have that choice. Some don't even get a meal. What's more it's a free meal and as you said it is perfectly fine. We're not talking about the kind of meals depicted in Charles Dickens's Oliver Twist, or what was on offer in our generation. 
I may sound tough, but that's how I raise my kids. They are allowed to have their own tastes and not like something, but there has to be some limits. Otherwise they would only eat chicken and chips. 
What's more, tastes do change. The more you try something, the more likely you are to like it. It takes approximately 10-15 times of trying some food for someone to like it. You can tell them they don't have to eat it all, but they have to give it a try. 

Hope you find what works for you.


----------



## wishuwerehere

absolutely give a packed lunch. my daughter is not fussy so if she wasn't eating one meal out of 14 i'd know she genuinely didn't like it. i think kids need to be fed to learn properly


----------



## aimee-lou

Packed lunch. Earl is in infants so gets free lunch. Every Wednesday is roast dinner which he does not like....even when i make it at home or we go out for Sunday lunch. I send him with packed lunch on Wednesday. No great problem for me and he is fed able to learn.


----------



## EcoMama

My son is picky, so one of the reasons I have chosen to do free school meals is because I hope it opens him up to new foods, which he is most likely to try as his friends are also eating it. He's in reception, and since the start of term I have seen a difference in his eating habits at home (he tried mussels last week, despite being disgusted by them any other time).

His teacher the other day though did say that he didn't eat any dinner, it was roast... he hates gravy, so wouldn't eat it. So I've changed that day to jacket, but if he doesn't eat that then I prob won't sub with packed lunch as I know he'll be eating the pudding/yoghurt, so won't be going totally hungry.


----------



## Tasha

I would send them in with a packed lunch. I'm not one who does the you will eat what you are given because I wouldn't want to be made to eat something I didn't like. Besides that I know that when I'm hungry I won't concentrate properly so wouldn't expect children to be able to.


----------



## hattiehippo

I would send packed lunch. Sandwiches don't have to cost a lot and if they're hungry they're not going to be engaged in the afternoon. My son could have free school lunch because he's in Reception. He takes sandwiches every day because when we tried them, all he ate was jelly and baked beans.

I really don't subscribe to eat this or be hungry. I grew up with that attitude and it was horrible as there is a lot of food I don't like even now. If it's only 1 particular meal they don't like then they're not being really fussy.


----------



## Natasha2605

I'd sent them with packed lunches. It's not like they're being deliberately awkward and imo it's wrong to not provide if you know they'll come home starving. 

Packed lunches really do not cost that much.


----------



## Mrs Doddy

Everyone has different tastes it's unfortunate that on the day that they don't like either option I would give a packed lunch , I think it's unfair to force them to eat something they have never liked as opposed to them not trying something new


----------



## alicecooper

Just to add it's not entirely about the cost. I know sending a couple of ham sandwiches wouldn't cost much, it's more the fact that I'm more or less saying it's okay to be picky.

Well Jason is very picky in general, so I don't like encouraging more picky behaviour.

Lydia on the other hand until very recently loved jacket potatoes, so I don't want again to feel as though I'm just indulging a random picky whim of hers.

But on the other hand I don't want them hungry all day either. Ugh!


----------



## Ummi2boyz

I think the school meals are very complete and balanced, so yes, they might not eat the lasagna and/or jacket potato, but there is still a starter and some afters, so they're not really on an empty stomach. And depending on their age they may even have a mid-morning snack (I remember ds1 having a mid morning snack until year 2). 
Have you discussed the issue with them? And with the school?


----------



## Ceejay123

.


----------



## Laucu

I get both sides of the argument - Emma hates pizza and the days that they serve that at school (twice a month) I don't send a packed lunch - she just eats the potatoes, the veg and the pudding. It's still enough for her. She also gets a snack of fruit in the morning and I'll give her a snack when I pick her up.

I am of the mindset that you have to eat what you're given.... School dinners are miles better than they were for me 30 years ago. It's all really yummy quality stuff. 

Also, Her school does a 'school packed lunch'. I'm not sure what that contains but might be worth finding out if yours does?


----------



## Midnight_Fairy

I have the exact same problem and mine both have packed lunch every Wednesday amd Ruby every other friday. Not a problem at all x


----------



## neadyda

I would send them with packed lunch. Jamie has packed lunch every day as he is fussy and would hate the thought of him starving.


----------



## shanny

I think if they are eating all the rest that's pretty good !!!

I think I would try and see what they do eat on those days if its possible, like others have said are the eating the accompaniments?

If not -- a packed lunch on the same day should not cause too many fall outs


----------



## Beckettshades

Id send the lunch. Mine has one once every three weeks cos she hates the meals on offer that day. (A genuine dislike of pies and roast potatoes).


----------



## MummyMana

I would definitely send the packed lunch! As far as I'm concerned it's never ok to force someone to eat something they don't like, especially if they are already "picky" it can set them back years! 

It's definitely okay to have foods you don't want to eat, I'm sure we all have things we would never eat in a million years, children are no exception, so don't worry that you are enforcing bad eating habits :) you are simply enforcing your kids being individuals :)


----------



## sparkle_1979

I wouldn't send packed lunch. Ruby has an egg and toast and then a banana before school. There is always yogurt and fruit at meal times at school. She chooses not to eat then she will just have to wait x


----------



## kitabird

Don't get me started on school dinners! DS is super fussy, so is usually starving when I pick him up. There's always some element of the meal he likes though. So for instance if it was lasagne and he didn't like it he would just eat what came with it e.g. potato wedges, and the dessert. Plus he drinks his milk in the morning. I'm refusing to send packed lunch when there's perfectly good food provided.


----------



## RachA

I would send a packed lunch in with them. The fact that they have a 'free' meal at school is beside the point for me. It's something that's only just started so if they hadn't of brought it in we'd of been paying to make the packed lunch anyway. 

We are trying to work out what E will or won't eat at school at the moment. She does have food issues so we may end up sending her a packed lunch in 2 out of 3 days a week when we know it's going to be something she can't eat. 

While I do agree to some extent that children should be grateful they are having a meal etc etc, to me it depends on why they are being 'fussy'. My son pretty much eats everything. If he had school meals and came home saying he didn't want the meal on certain days (and I know it was something he does eat) I'd say tough and wouldn't send a packed lunch in for him. However with E it's different-if she doesn't eat at lunch she won't eat at dinner so she needs to have a meal at lunchtime and it doesn't bother me that I'm paying for it. 
2 meals every other week isn't that much. For us we have the food in anyway so it's not a big deal.


----------



## MrsT&Ben

EcoMama said:


> My son is picky, so one of the reasons I have chosen to do free school meals is because I hope it opens him up to new foods, which he is most likely to try as his friends are also eating it. He's in reception, and since the start of term I have seen a difference in his eating habits at home (he tried mussels last week, despite being disgusted by them any other time).
> 
> His teacher the other day though did say that he didn't eat any dinner, it was roast... he hates gravy, so wouldn't eat it. So I've changed that day to jacket, but if he doesn't eat that then I prob won't sub with packed lunch as I know he'll be eating the pudding/yoghurt, so won't be going totally hungry.

This!


----------



## dani_tinks

Jacob is very fussy and so I opted for the free school meals in the hope it would broaden his horizon a little! Saying that, if he comes home starving saying he really didn't eat anything on his plate on that day I would send him in with a packed lunch if there wasn't an alternative hot lunch that he liked.


----------



## alicecooper

See all of mine get free school dinners cos we're on benefits.

We've decided we're definitely going to send Jason with a packed lunch. The jury is still out on Lydia. I think she should get a packed lunch, but DH thinks that's ridiculous because she used to eat the jacket potatoes just fine for the past 4 years.


----------



## MummyMana

It could just be that the ones the school serve are disgusting, rather than her being picky about it... I've seen primary schools receive deliveries of pre-peeled potatoes lol, school dinners are renowned for being inedible anyway!

For years I thought I hated roast potatoes because of school dinners :(


----------



## leoniebabey

i would not send a packed lunch! theres stuff on my lo's menu he would turn his nose up to at home but happily eats it at school. my lo's school has 2 choices (a veggie and non veggie option) then a selection of sarnies etc.


----------



## lhancock90

I agree maybe its the way the school prepare it that alters the taste? I hate Mac and Cheese and id be really upset if i was forced to eat it. Id send a packed lunch.


----------



## Ummi2boyz

I'm wondering whether your school has a school dinner taster day for parents. My son's school had one, so you could try the food and see whether your children are being unreasonnable or not. If they don't have such a day, you could ask them to organise one.


----------



## Kate&Lucas

I'd send a packed lunch. I don't particularly like the food options available to me at work so I bring in my own food, that's not being picky it's knowing what I do and don't like to eat. I wouldn't let myself go without lunch because of it and I wouldn't let Lucas.


----------



## Midnight_Fairy

If ours don't eat it twice they phone you.


----------



## Jchihuahua

Daisy is in Reception and has a packed lunch everyday. She is a fussy eater and I would hate to think she was hungry or upset at lunchtimes so I feel happier knowing she has had her sandwiches.


----------



## KayBea

ide let my daughter go hungry... she cant be that hungry if she wont eat it..

jacked potato is just like mash, lasagne is just like spag bowl.


----------



## alicecooper

update : I've switched all 3 of them to packed lunches for lasagne day. Alex as well, as it seems he's only been eating plain jackets as he hates the toppings. A plain dry jacket for a lunch is kind of naff if you ask me.

Today is their first packed lunch day. All three of them were LUDICROUSLY excited about having packet lunches today. I've never seen three people more excited about packed lunch in my life lol.

Thanks all for the advice. A lot of mixed opinions but I think we've done the right thing. It's only once a fortnight after all.

x


----------



## Ummi2boyz

As long as you find what works for you and your kids that's all that matters. Glad you found a solution.


----------



## Midnight_Fairy

glad your all happy :D I think a mix is a good balance.


----------



## RachA

I love that they are excited about having a packed lunch. A good compromise I think. I may have to send Esther in with one on fish cake day as she just won't eat them.


----------

