# US ladies-position during childbirth and other fears in hospital birth process



## MonstHer

Does the hospital allow you to be in any position? I've heard of doctors/nurses trying to force you onto your back, and I really really don't want to do that. 
Does the epidural make it that way?
(I don't want that either, but who knows)
Of course, I read on hospital guidelines but I am still uneasy.
They say they can't force you to do anything, but I don't believe it.
I'm giving birth in a military hospital overseas, and they can be VERY VERY demanding and controlling. 
It's only going to be me and my husband in there, this is my first, and I don't want to lose control or have pushy bitchy nurses and corpsmen constantly on me to do it their way.
And then, as I used to work in a hospital, I know the majority of health providers do not take pregnant women seriously.
Is it really true they start inducing you at 12 hours?!?
WhYY??!?!
and should I wait for a long while at home after I go in, after my water breaks?
I really want minimal medicalisation. (sp?)
I know the answer to all of this would be to have a natural home birth or go to a regular birthing center.
I can't really do that as A,) I am Rh-neg. B.) NOTHING like that here except one off base, which is HUGELY expensive) C.) The child won't count as an american citizen at first, if not born in the U.S. hospital here! There will be ten gajillion types of papers to fill out, and even more problems to get the baby citizenship to the U.S. We don't have that time because three months later we are moving to the U.K. And D.) it's the only hospital with a NICU if something does happen!

So, as you can tell, I'm extremely aprehensive. :(
I feel like I have no options as I'm overseas, I don't have the cash or resources to go out of my insurance, and I'm terrified of the hospital. :nope:


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## cranberry987

Hi

Just wanted to let you know that I'm r- and planning a home birth. I don't know about the other issues but it might be an idea to have a meeting with them before the birth and discuss your wishes


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## knitbit

If you have an epidural, you won't be able to move, so you will likely be flat on your back the whole time. You should be able to walk and move how you like during active labor if you don't have an epidural. If they want to monitor you, ask if they have mobile telemetry units. I used one with my last delivery (unmedicated VBAC) because they wanted to monitor me and the baby the whole time. Once I was ready to push, I personally didn't care what position I was in, and delivered my son while on my back.


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## MonstHer

knitbit, how many hours of labor did you have in the hospital?
at what point did you decide to go to the hospital?


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## MonstHer

cranberry987 said:


> Hi
> 
> Just wanted to let you know that I'm r- and planning a home birth. I don't know about the other issues but it might be an idea to have a meeting with them before the birth and discuss your wishes

How soon after the home birth will you be going to the hospital to get the baby the vaccine?
Are you having midwives, people there in your home to help you?


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## sjc8503

You should only be limited to your bed if you get the epidural. You don't have to remain flat the entire time with the epidural. You can be positioned on your left or right side. You will just need someone to help you get into that position. When the time comes to push you'll be on your back though. 

If your water does break on its own, hospitals like to have the delivery within 24hrs. Your at a risk for infection if you go longer.


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## Nikki_d72

MonstHer said:


> cranberry987 said:
> 
> 
> Hi
> 
> Just wanted to let you know that I'm r- and planning a home birth. I don't know about the other issues but it might be an idea to have a meeting with them before the birth and discuss your wishes
> 
> How soon after the home birth will you be going to the hospital to get the baby the vaccine?
> Are you having midwives, people there in your home to help you?Click to expand...

It's you who gets the shot, not the baby - it's to prevent your immune system "remembering" the foreign substance (baby's blood) and possibly react to a future pregnancy by trying to destroy it. You'll need to ask around if you can get the shot at home or not, I'm sure it will depend on where you are in the world - do you mind telling us where you are? It may help with advice. 

Generally midwives will assist ladies homebirthing - do you have a midwife system where you are? Outcomes under midwives are proven to be better than with Ob's. (and they are far more woman-centred in their care, generally.)

They often want you to be on your back in hospital for their own convenience, so if you really want an active birth I would speak to them about their protocol prior to going in and see what concessions you can gain. Also have a strong birth plan and make sure your partner is well-versed in it and willing and able to advocate for you, as you don't want/probably won't be able to stand up for your wishes during labour. 

I would strongly advise staying home to labour for as long as you are able before going in if you want an unmedicalised birth, it will depend on distance, obviously how long this can be. You will labour more effectively i your own familiar surroundings anyway. 

Your waters may not break till pushing stage, so don't rely on that as a sign - it only happens before onset of labour in about 25% of cases, approximately. All the best, and you will find lots of great info on natural birth in "Home and Natural Birth" section here on B&B, have a mooch around! :flower:


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## cranberry987

They take a sample of cord blood which I assume the mw then takes off to get tested. If it's r+ then you have 72 hrs from birth to get the jab which I think I can get at my gp (can get the 28w one there at least)

I agree with the above, it might be an option to just stay at home as long as possible depending on how far away you are


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## NaturalMomma

I gave birth to my first in a hospital in US. I labored for 15 hours at home before going in. They said everything was going good, but they wanted to speed it up so they broke my waters and gave me Pitocin. I did have to stay in bed the whole time which made everything worse. I could only give birth on my back as they gave me no options. I had a homebirth with my second.


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## LockandKey

they can't make you do anything, but if you don't speak up you may be doing something you don't want to. I was on my back, before going in I didn't want to be, I wanted to be squatting, but in the heat of the moment, I forgot what I wanted and just went with the flow. I did change positions once though and tried pushing while on my side


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## AlwaysPraying

Just one note....during labour baby moves and mom moves and everything goes everywhere. I was in every position known to man and never really did find anything soothing. But that being said, there was a point where they did "force" me to be in a certain position, but that's because babies heart beat was dropping and they needed me to be in the best position for baby to get the best blood flow possible. 

As well, they will tell you different positions and you can try (and I would honestly try what they offer) but when you first go into them they will hurt! But that will go away quickly. If you are in one position for too long it can delay labour and make things longer. That's also sometimes why they get you to move to a less comfy position. 

As for the epidural, you'll be on your back, but you won't feel anything and lying down will be welcomed! 

You'll do great!


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## PepsiChic

quick question, are you or the babies father an American Citizen? 

If so it doesnt mater where the baby is born s/he will become American citizen at birth theres no paperwork to make your baby a citizen if one of the parents already is. Also they stopped handing out citizenship for being born ON American soil as far as I understand the baby has to be born to an American parent now.

There isnt a lot of paperwork to fill out. If one of you are indeed America, you just register the birth like normal and then order a birth certificate, it can take a few weeks after the birth for the birth certificate to become available. If your LO is going to be traveling out of the country soon after birth you must have a passport for baby first. You need the birth certificate to get the passport. So dont plan on taking any trips for at least 3 or 4 months after baby is born because the whole process of birth certificate and then getting a passport can take that long. 

If your not American you'll need to register the babys birth with the country you are citizens of and then apply for an overseas passport for baby. You should get your OH to look all this up so that you dont have to worry about it.

as for the hospital...if you dont want an epi make that very clear when you first walk in. I had a completely natural hospital birth here in the US. Once i made my demands very clear (NO Epi, no meds etc) they were really lovely and didnt mention any of it again. 

Good luck!


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## brunette&bubs

Does the hospital allow you to be in any position? I've heard of doctors/nurses trying to force you onto your back, and I really really don't want to do that. *I was never seen by a doctor until I was pushing, but the nurse let me walk around, bounce on a ball, sit in a recliner, go on all fours, lay on my side, etc...*
Does the epidural make it that way? *I had an epidural and my nurse helped me move into different positions.*

Is it really true they start inducing you at 12 hours?!?
WhYY??!?! *I don't know, I went natural but my labor only lasted 10 hours and there was never talk of pitocin*
and should I wait for a long while at home after I go in, after my water breaks? *go in immediately if your water breaks. If you are having contractions go in if they are 5 min apart, lasting 1 minute for 1 hour*


You really have to accept though that your labor will NOT go as planned BUT the goal is a healthy baby in the end


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## MonstHer

Thanks for all the info everyone.

To answer some questions:
I am in Japan.
My husband and I are both American.
I absolutely have to move countries so quickly after birth because of military orders. They have ways of speeding it up thank goodness. 
When I asked the hospital the questions about having birth offbase, they told me I would have problems with citizenship. I see that person probably had no idea what she was talking about though.
I will go in with clear orders I think at this point if I must give birth there.
This is freaking me out. I don't think I've ever stressed out from something so much before it happened. I'm usually such a laidback person. Four months left, omg! 
Somebody please just come with me and take over the evil midwives for me.


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## LockandKey

If my husband was stationed in japan I would be in the exact position as you are. I was talkink to my hubby about the same exact thing before our baby was born and he said that she would have something called dual citizenship, meaning she would have been both a japanese citizen and an american citizen. I don't know all the details but there shouldn't be any problems, at least I hope not. Your hubbys higher ups should know better though


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## PepsiChic

LockandKey said:


> If my husband was stationed in japan I would be in the exact position as you are. I was talkink to my hubby about the same exact thing before our baby was born and he said that she would have something called dual citizenship, meaning she would have been both a japanese citizen and an american citizen. I don't know all the details but there shouldn't be any problems, at least I hope not. Your hubbys higher ups should know better though

that really depends on the countries laws. Some countries like the UK and I believe the USA dont allow citizenship just by being born on their soil anymore. Its only given through birth right (a parent is that nationality) or nationalized (visa processes) 

So you'd have to find out about the law for citizenship if born in Japan...HOWEVER my friends baby was born in a military base in Germany, and because the baby was born onbase...the base is considered American soil. so the baby wasnt allowed German citizenship either way.

So the OP might want to find out if the base is considered American soil. As for the baby, the OP needs to check there isnt anything special that needs to be done to register the babys birth overseas (in America) The midwifes on base should know more about it as they've probably done this a fair few times!


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## robinator

I'm kind of leaning towards giving birth in the squatting position; on the other hand, I'd love an epidural. Don't know how well the two go together!


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## PepsiChic

robinator said:


> I'm kind of leaning towards giving birth in the squatting position; on the other hand, I'd love an epidural. Don't know how well the two go together!

probably not very well, an epidural kind of makes your legs useless, which is why you wont be able to go to the bathroom you'll have a catheter fitted to collect your urine. 

sitting actually isnt a bad position as you can use your legs on the leg restraint things on the end of the bed to bare down and push, but at the same time are using the force of gravity to help deliver your baby, which you cant use to your advantage if your lying down.


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## MonstHer

PepsiChic said:


> LockandKey said:
> 
> 
> If my husband was stationed in japan I would be in the exact position as you are. I was talkink to my hubby about the same exact thing before our baby was born and he said that she would have something called dual citizenship, meaning she would have been both a japanese citizen and an american citizen. I don't know all the details but there shouldn't be any problems, at least I hope not. Your hubbys higher ups should know better though
> 
> that really depends on the countries laws. Some countries like the UK and I believe the USA dont allow citizenship just by being born on their soil anymore. Its only given through birth right (a parent is that nationality) or nationalized (visa processes)
> 
> So you'd have to find out about the law for citizenship if born in Japan...HOWEVER my friends baby was born in a military base in Germany, and because the baby was born onbase...the base is considered American soil. so the baby wasnt allowed German citizenship either way.
> 
> So the OP might want to find out if the base is considered American soil. As for the baby, the OP needs to check there isnt anything special that needs to be done to register the babys birth overseas (in America) The midwifes on base should know more about it as they've probably done this a fair few times!Click to expand...

On base is considered american soil (well sort of, enough so that it counts for this)
it would be if I had the baby off-base I would have problems with the citizenship.


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## PepsiChic

MonstHer said:


> PepsiChic said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LockandKey said:
> 
> 
> If my husband was stationed in japan I would be in the exact position as you are. I was talkink to my hubby about the same exact thing before our baby was born and he said that she would have something called dual citizenship, meaning she would have been both a japanese citizen and an american citizen. I don't know all the details but there shouldn't be any problems, at least I hope not. Your hubbys higher ups should know better though
> 
> that really depends on the countries laws. Some countries like the UK and I believe the USA dont allow citizenship just by being born on their soil anymore. Its only given through birth right (a parent is that nationality) or nationalized (visa processes)
> 
> So you'd have to find out about the law for citizenship if born in Japan...HOWEVER my friends baby was born in a military base in Germany, and because the baby was born onbase...the base is considered American soil. so the baby wasnt allowed German citizenship either way.
> 
> So the OP might want to find out if the base is considered American soil. As for the baby, the OP needs to check there isnt anything special that needs to be done to register the babys birth overseas (in America) The midwifes on base should know more about it as they've probably done this a fair few times!Click to expand...
> 
> On base is considered american soil (well sort of, enough so that it counts for this)
> it would be if I had the baby off-base I would have problems with the citizenship.Click to expand...

you'll be fine then so dont worry about citizenship! You'll get the birth certificate which will show your baby was born on american soil, make sure you apply for a passport asap after baby is born, useful thing to have. and multiple copies of the birth cert because ive heard they can be hard to get again, especially if int he future that base no longer exists. 

good luck sweety, x


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## MandaAnda

I really can't see how you'd have a problem if you baby was born off-base either. I'm American and live in the UK. My husband is British. Our baby was born here in the UK. I registered his birth as normal here, got the usual birth certificate. Then, I had to go to the American Embassy in London to register him as an "American birth abroad," so he has another birth certificate for that. I also got his American passport then as well (he's a dual citizen, so he has two passports).

If you'd rather not birth in that hospital, I think it's worth ringing the American Embassy in Japan and seeing what the score is. Also, know that you don't "have" to do anything. Research what you're wondering about, inform yourself and make informed choices. If you don't want to remain immobile, have constant monitoring, have an epidural, have your labour augmented....don't. Even here in the UK, they wanted to give me Pitocin (Syntocinon here), and I told them to give my body a chance first. I never had to have it. It sounds like you need someone to stand up for you while you're in labour - have you thought about hiring a doula? x


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## MonstHer

I want to have the baby either at home or in an off-base hospital, which the base is saying it will be harder to the passport/birth certificate and so on.
I think I will go to the embassy, because this is not the first time they have tried to scare me into doing things because they don't want to work things a different way.
Also, since i am active duty right now, I think it may be easier to get answers after I'm not owned by the government from these people. (I'm separating very shortly)
I've been researching like mad about stuff and things of the like in the hospital, but it's NOT the same in military hospitals. Their stuff says one thing, but they DO a completely different thing.
There's only one doula in my entire location. :cry:
I am honestly thinking about having an unassisted birth at home and winging it, if my pregnancy ends up being completely uncomplicated.
I know for sure there is no law against women for that.


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## AveryATL

PepsiChic said:


> I believe the USA dont allow citizenship just by being born on their soil anymore. Its only given through birth right (a parent is that nationality) or nationalized (visa processes)

Nope, the 14th amendment is still intact, which gives citizenship to any person who is born on American soil - and that includes army bases abroad. :flower:

It becomes more complicated only when the child is born somewhere other than american soil, and one of the parents is not a citizen, particularly if the couple is not married. 

It explains it pretty well on wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthright_citizenship_in_the_United_States


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## MonstHer

NaturalMomma said:


> I gave birth to my first in a hospital in US. I labored for 15 hours at home before going in. They said everything was going good, but they wanted to speed it up so they broke my waters and gave me Pitocin. I did have to stay in bed the whole time which made everything worse. I could only give birth on my back as they gave me no options. I had a homebirth with my second.


See, how do I fight situations like this?? 
it seems you would have been fine without intervention.
This type of hospital experience is what I am scared of.
:cry:


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## mama_t

My son was born in germany when my husband was stationed there! I had him off-base and getting him an american birth certificate was no problem whatsoever. My husband could do the paperwork for a birth abroad with his unit so didnt even have to go to an embassy! Im not sure how long it took for the birth certificate to come in but his passport arrived after about 3 weeks!
good luck :)


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## sam1984

if you do not feel that you will be listened to then make sure your other half knows your wishes before you get there but also that he understands to ask you.
it amazes me how much more persuasive my husband becomes and is there to purely stick up for me and make sure i get what i want if the mw does not want to listen.


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## sam1984

i just read that you are thinking of an unassisted home birth and although dont quote me, i am sure that if you plan to have a baby without any medical assistance then you can be in trouble over here, so although i would not suggest it please dont post ot on here if it is going through your mind.


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## AlwaysPraying

I don't know what the rules are, seems your situation is pretty complicated. One thing I want to offer is if you do choose to do a home birth, just make sure you know what your emergency options are. If for some reason it becomes an emergency or you cannot cope and have to go the hospital, prepare yourself with the rules and process before getting in that situation. (sounds like that's what your doing now). 

I'd really hope that they wouldn't force you to do something that you weren't happy with. I know for me they did break my waters and did put me on the drip. They wanted to do both at once and I told them that I wanted a break to see if breaking my waters would work for a couple hours, then do the drip. They did what I asked, but breaking the waters did nothing and I went on the drip anyhow. I'm glad they didn't push me and I didn't give in and do it too soon. I wanted to see what my body would do naturally, however that was nothing!


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## moonbeam_sea

With my first I was induced due to preeclampsia. I was given pitocin for the induction and penicillin for being group b strep positive. I was allowed to move around, though I was on the monitor most of the time. I could still freely use the rest room, and I spent most of my time laboring in the rocking chair in the room. Frankly I wanted to lay down for the pushing part, so I dont know about what they would or wouldnt allow. 

With my second, I only got to the hospital 20 minutes before she was born (labored mostly at home due to bad advice from my OB about when to go in), so again, I dont really know what was or wasnt allowed there either. After they checked me and found I was at 6 cm, they moved me to the delivery room. There they put on the monitors to make sure the baby was ok, and for a minute or two it was, then all of a sudden they lost her heart beat. They had me lay on my side as they tried to get a monitor on her head, but at that point, I needed to push really bad. One push on my side and her head was out. Another push and she was delivered. It was much easier physically than my son's delivery, but much scarier as there were a few minutes where I didn't know if she even had a heartbeat. My OBs only got demanding about me doing something when there was an issue with the baby (had to lay on my side a couple of times while in labor with my son due to heart rate dips as well, and had to breath oxygen for a bit during his delivery). 

Hopefully you will have good luck with laboring how you want. I prefer to be in the hospital in case something goes wrong. Obviously I had to with my son due to the preeclampsia, but it was nice that they were there to take care of him when he was born as he needed some NICU time due to breathing troubles from swollowing meconium. Granted that could have been from the induction, but even still, non induced babies swollow meconium sometimes, too. Having done most of the laboring for my daughter at home, I definatly liked doing it that way, but only leaving home 30 minutes before delivery was perhaps cutting it a bit too close. I really prefer having the saftey net that you get in a hospital for a birth. There are more people and equipment ready to respond just in case. Oh ja, and with my daughter, my water broke less than 10 minutes before delivery, so we wouldn't have made it to the hospital if I had waited for that.  Good luck, and I hope all works out.


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## MandaAnda

Have a look here https://japan.usembassy.gov/ and look for registering an American birth abroad. When my little one was about four or five months old, we made an appointment at the American Embassy in London (I'm American, my husband is British), and we got his birth certificate for an American birth abroad and a temporary passport on the day. Before the temporary passport expired (done because we had a trip coming up soon), we sent off for his full passport, which didn't take very long at all.


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## stacey&bump

the sister of the labour ward was in with me when i had my daughter and advised me that the best and most comfortable position & the position which is less likely to cause tearing is on ur side , this is how i delivered eabha lily & i received no episiotomy i just needed one outer stitch for a slight graze which was no problem at all , good luck !


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## MandaAnda

The most comfortable position is the one that *you* are most comfortable in. ;)


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## stacey&bump

yeah thats true , but with a 70% less chance of tearing i was all for it lol & it is very comfortable ;)


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## MandaAnda

stacey&#8782 said:


> yeah thats true , but with a 70% less chance of tearing i was all for it lol & it is very comfortable ;)

I'm genuinely curious where she got that statistic. I was soooo not comfortable on my side or back. Upright and bouncing on my ball was when I felt the best. I hope to deliver in a pool or on a birthing stool next time. Gravity's a great thing.


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## citymouse

Is there a chance you can ask around and talk to women who have given birth there? There must be some who chose to have less intervention, and you could get a sense from them how hard it was (or not) to get their wishes across. Knowing going in that it can be done might calm your nerves...


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## calliebaby

I had my baby in a hospital and I chose no pain relief and very little intervention. They let me walk around as long as I wanted to and be in any position I wanted to. I couldn't stand being on my back or my side while having contractions. They respected that. I ended up holding myself up off the bed the whole time. I chose to push with my legs in the stirrups as it was comfortable for me while I was pushing. I had all stomach labor and it relived some pain with my legs being supported. I only pushed for 14 minutes. The doctor respected my wishes regarding vaccines and everything that they did with me. I felt empowered and respected. I think it is important to make your concerns known from the beginning to ensure the best outcome. Good luck!


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