# Loss at 13 wks, started with loss of amniotic fluid



## threebirds

Hi, my thoughts go out to everyone posting and reading that have experienced loss. 

I am still raw as it is only 2 days after a D&E at 13 wks. I had been spotting a bit on and off for a month or so and had two early scans. The last was 11+4 and that was fine, showing hb and movement. Then Monday, 6 days ago, I leaked amniotic fluid in my sleep. We were away from home so I phoned the EPU and then played a wait and see game. I wasn't even sure if it was the fluid. But there was a lot of it and of course we now know it was. I bled a bit on Thurs. Had a scan on Fri. There was no sac and no hb. Because I live in a remote area it was better to stay in and go to theatre rather than wait for things to happen naturally and have complications. So now we are back at home and slowly taking it all in. I doubt we'll ever know if the foetus was ok before the loss of fluid. And what is bothering me is of course whether there is a problem with the cervix. I am doing ok, not physically sore and bleeding almost stopped. OH is so loving and supportive. I know there are no answers but I do want to know how to find out if I have cervix incompetence as then at least maybe something can be done to prevent it happening again. We would like to try again when we are more healed. Thank you for reading.


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## Twinkie210

I am so sorry for your loss, I had a d&c on Friday. The physical pain is not that bad, but the emotional pain is much harder. I wasn't as far along as you, I never got to see my baby or hear its heartbeat, so I am sure your pain is that much more intensified. Nothing anyone will say will help. I hope you get your answers, and I hope for a speedy recovery both physically and emotionaly (sp?).


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## threebirds

Thank you Twinkle and so sorry for your loss xx


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## cla

Hun Im so sorry, I lost my baby last year at 17 weeks due to my waters breaking so I feel your pain xxxxxx I hope you are coping the best you can xxxx


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## threebirds

Thank you Cla. I really appreciate it and I am so very sorry for your loss. 

This was our first preg and I thought we were moving out of the danger zone at 13 wks. I think in my head I was associating pain and bleeding with mc (even tho I know that is not necessarily the case). I just didnt really know that it was over or that it was def the amniotic fluid at the time as it seeped out while I waa asleep. I even thought ir could be urine. Now I'm wondering if I had rushed to a&e, could something have been done... We won't know if a foetal problem caused the membrane to break or if life was lost after the fluid loss, whether it was a foetal abnormality, a cervix problem or some kind of infection. Knowing why it happened would be helpful for next time but like most people who experience loss, we won't know why. Anyway, i thank you for your words, hugs xx


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## bananaboat

So sorry for your loss. Mine was around 9 weeks just days after a perfect scan. Lots of positive thoughts to you... :hugs:


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## threebirds

Bananaboat, thank you so much and so sorry you have gone through this too. Thank you for your hugs. I really need them. I feel there must have been something I should have done. Im scared it will happen again or we wont get preg again, that first preg took us a little over a year. Thank you xx


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## cla

threebirds said:


> Thank you Cla. I really appreciate it and I am so very sorry for your loss.
> 
> This was our first preg and I thought we were moving out of the danger zone at 13 wks. I think in my head I was associating pain and bleeding with mc (even tho I know that is not necessarily the case). I just didnt really know that it was over or that it was def the amniotic fluid at the time as it seeped out while I waa asleep. I even thought ir could be urine. Now I'm wondering if I had rushed to a&e, could something have been done... We won't know if a foetal problem caused the membrane to break or if life was lost after the fluid loss, whether it was a foetal abnormality, a cervix problem or some kind of infection. Knowing why it happened would be helpful for next time but like most people who experience loss, we won't know why. Anyway, i thank you for your words, hugs xx

I'm here if you ever want to talk, I had to give birth to our baby so I got to have tests on it, it was the last thing I wanted to have done our baby being messed with. It does get easier over time and ttc did help me but sadly I've had another 5 mc, I wish I could trade my body in for a new one lol


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## Carry22

Hi threebirds, I'm so sorry for your loss :hugs:

It sounds like you went through something very similar to me - I lost my baby girl at the end of June, I found out at 15 wks but I just had my follow up appointment at the hosp last week and my baby had actually died at 13wks.

During my pregnancy I was back and forward to the Early Pregnancy Unit with bleeding and brown staining but each time they scanned me everything was ok. I then had the same experience as you at 12/13 weeks when I lost all my fluid through the night when I was sleeping. I phoned the hospital and I went to the EPU first thing in the morning where I was scanned - the heartbeat was still there at the time but they couldn't get a good picture on the ultrasound to see whether the fluid had decreased around the baby. Despite my protests that I had lost my fluid, they didn't believe me for some reason :growlmad: and sent me home. 

A few days later I called them back to say I was still concerned that something was wrong, I hadn't lost any more fluid or blood but I just had a terrible feeling. I was fobbed off by the hospital who just said that I was over-worrying things!!! So I just carried on and tried to think positive only to go in for a scan at 15 wks with bleeding to find out that my baby had died :nope: and now I know that the baby died at 13wks which was when I lost my fluid, I am so angry!!!

I was told that when the waters go that early then there is no chance of the baby surviving or developing properly so please don't beat yourself up by thinking things may have been different. 

We had a post mortem done on the baby and I had loads of tests but everything came back clear and I was told we were just unlucky which is very hard to take!! Like you, I just keep thinking there must be some reason for the waters to break e.g. infection, cervix problem etc 

I hope hearing my story helps you a little to know that I am going through the same pain as you and you're not alone :hugs:

Carry xx


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## threebirds

Carry, thank you so much for sharing your experiences. I just saw another post of yours on another thread and was going to send you a message as our experiences are so very similar. I also had brown spotting and two visits to EPU at 6 & 11 wks. All seemed to be going well, saw heartbeat and movement. We were away from home when I lost the fluid while I slept. I rang the EPU next morning and they said it was unlikely to be the amniotic fluid but I could go to them as soon as I got back if I wanted but best really to wait and see. So I waited as a few days later we had our scheduled NHS scan. By then there was no hb and it was all over. That was 13 wks. I think I niavely thought of mc as involving blood and cramps, not something that seeps away while you sleep. It is good you had some tests done, even though there are never enough answers. How are you feeling now and how do you feel about ttc? We would like to try again asap. Thinking of you xx


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## cla

I also had spotting at 6 weeks as well I wonder why it happens, I also had spotting the morning my waters broke


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## Carry22

Threebirds - you might have seen me posting on the TTC after loss thread, we're not trying just now and not preventing either. It took us 7 months to conceive first time and i found it quite stressful doing all the OPKs and temp charting so the thought of going straight back into that is just too much for me right now so we're just hoping it happens naturally (probably wishful thinking). I got my first period just over 4 wks after the m/c so I'm hoping that means my body's back to normal.

I'm doing ok at the minute, thanks for asking :hugs: I feel like my grief comes in waves, I'll maybe have 3-4 good days but then it all catches up with me and I'll have a total breakdown for a couple of days. I imagine it will be like this for a good few months :cry: when we had our hosp app last wk we found out the baby was a girl and that really set me back because it was like grieving for a whole new person, I just couldn't believe we had a little girl and now we don't, life is just so cruel. 

To make things a million times worse I have so many friends pregnant just now and its so hard to see them and put on a brave face. I can't even begin to imagine how hard it will be when they actually have their babies!

Where abouts in the UK do you live?? Did you have a good experience with the NHS and your hospital during your pregnancy??


Cla - Hi and I'm really sorry for the loss of your baby last year and all your miscarriages - I have no idea how you cope :hugs: 
do you mind me asking if you were given a reason for your waters going at 17wks?? Thanks x


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## cla

Carry of course I don't mind xx
They said it could have been because I had an infection or my baby had died. I had a post mortom done on our baby and everything was fine they said it was one of those things. It is hard to deal with hun losing a baby but time is a healer xxx


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## Carry22

Thanks for replying Cla :hugs:

Our consultant said the same thing - he gave us quite a few reasons that it could've happened e.g. infection, cervix problem, bleeding etc etc but he was very clear that nothing came back on the test results so we shouldn't focus on anything too much. 

Its really hard though, I suppose its just your natural instinct to keep on searching for answers!!


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## cla

I'm still doing it now even if it was last feb, sometimes I just wish that there was somthing wrong with the baby so then this wouldn't happen again.
We never found the sex out of our baby, I just don't think I would have been able to cope I still don't think I could cope now xx
How are you doing today xxx


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## LittleWishes

Threebirds, I am so sorry you had to go through this too. My DH and I didn't even know we were pregnant. After being told we couldnt get pregnant without serious fertility treatments we were NTNP. So I ignored all the very typical pregnancy signs. On Aug 1st I woke up from a very strange dream at 4:23 amd and felt like I was laying in something wet. My first thought was 'I'm 27 and I wet the bed?!' so I get up and go to the bathroom (TMI ahead) and something the size of my clenched fist slipped out with a lot of blood. I would have been 8 weeks if it wasnt a MMC. But the wetness on my bed was a watery blood tinged type stuff. It was amniotic fluid. I was in complete shock. I feel like I am lucky because I now know I can get pregnant. But a little disappointed that this one didn't keep. 

I think that things are going to happen a certain way for a certain reason. You didn't rush to the emergency because you weren't meant to. This angel was needed elsewhere for a really good reason. Thats what makes me feel better about it. I feel for you and wish you the best of luck in getting a BFP as soon as you're ready! :flower:


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## Carry22

Cla - I'm not doing too bad today thanks :hugs: 

Just feeling a bit lonely really. Everyone seems to have just forgotten about what happened - friends and family. I know thats probably a good thing as I don't want to talk about it all the time but at the same time I'm feeling totally isolated. 

We didn't really plan to find out the sex of the baby but when we were at our hosp appt last wk we were asking loads of questions and my OH asked if the consultant knew the sex. I thought he'd maybe say yes or no and then ask if we would like to know but he just came straight out and said the baby was female, it was such a shock! As I said, it really set me back in my grieving process but now we've given her a name (Carrie) and its sunk in a bit.

Are you TTC at the minute??


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## threebirds

Cla - my heart goes out to you for having gone through this too many times. You are so thoughtful to be there for others who find themselves in this awful situation for the first time. 

I'm doing ok, just so so. Tired and on edge, just snapped at OH, so feeling even more miserable.

Littlewishes, thank you for sharing your story. I am so sorry for you loss.

Carry, I guess we're all in thia horrible lonliness club together, and knowing we're not alone has to help in some way. You asked about my hospital experience - was nhs, in ni & the staff were all kind and sympathetic. I was obviouly upset and in shock as the scan & eprc all happened the same day so Im sure they are q's and things I should have asked. Im going to my own gp next week so will chat to her more. I don't know if the hospital are doing tests, we gave our consent & I hope they do, but they might not as it was our first.

Overall I'm feeling gutted right now and don't know how I'll get through tomorrow. I know I will be feeling a 'week ago today ...' and that will be tough as it is all still raw.

Ladies I am thinking if you and sending you all a hug x


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## Andypanda6570

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## cla

Yeah we are still ttc, I'm not giving up till I get my forever baby.
This site as kept me going and meet wonderful people xxx


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## threebirds

Babydust to Cla xxx


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## Joanna82

Hi Girls, I am Joanna

I just read some of your posts and have to say that my story is very similar, I lost my baby boy at 25th week and I don't know yet what was the cause of the death. I will have some feedback in few weeks time. I hope everything will be alright with my body and I will be able to TTC. 

I wish you all the best 

XXX


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