# Advice for surrogate



## BigZai

Both my sisters have PCOS and its unlikely they can get pregnant and they both have asked me to be a surrogate (sometime in the next couple years) and I of course said yes but i wonder how that would happen
Is it easier to just get a sperm donor for me? 
Can their eggs be used?
If/when I have their kids would it be better to carry twins?

I also think about breastfeeding, we are very close and I am pro breastfeeding when possible so should I breast feed the first couple days so the baby gets the most important milk? should I pump?

I know it will be at least a year until anyone even looks into it but I can't help but think about it so any advice would be nice


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## Erised

I've never really looked into surrogacy, so I apologize if I get anything wrong here... 
Can I ask if your sisters have tried to get pregnant, and if so how long for? PCOS is most definitely not a sentence that doesn't allow you to carry your own children. In most cases women fall pregnant with the help of just a few pills. Yes, it can take a while (personal experience with PCOS), but it's doable. Surrogacy is a big step, one that most likely won't be needed. 

If you do decide to be a surrogate, you won't need a sperm donor. If PCOS is the only problem, then their husbands / boyfriends sperm would be used to fertilize the egg. With PCOS they will most likely be able to use your sisters own eggs, so all the implantation would be done in a clinic and you'd get the embryo implanted into your uterus. 

As for whether twins would be better? You don't get a choice. I believe there is a legal limit to how many embryos they will implant, to lower the chances of multiples. It is possible to have twins, but even several embryos implanted will not give you a guaranteed viable pregnancy, let alone twins. Twins come with a lot of extra risks attached, both during pregnancy as well as after as a lot of twins are born prematurely. 

As for breastfeeding, I think that would be up to your sisters. I can imagine that they'd want their right about birth, not a week later or so. Breastfeeding (as you know), is very time consuming. If you were to breastfeed they'd get a lot less bonding time with their child, so it's likely they'll choose against it. I'd definitely pump though so you could simply supply them with breastmilk to feed their child.


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## S123KEV

Hey BigZai,

Just wanted to let give you some websites that may be of use?

https://www.surrogacy.org.uk/

https://www.surromomsonline.com/support/index.php

https://www.surrogatemother.com/

I hope these help and all the best

Kev


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## kate1984

I know nothing on surrogacy but just wanted to let you know that i have severe PCOS with cycles ranging from 32 to 80 days and I have 4 healthy children all convieved naturally so your sisters may just get a lovely suprise x


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## Nise

You are obviously a very big hearted person and I admire you hugely for considering such a selfless thing as being a surrogate not once but twice. But as others have already said there is a lot that can be done for pcos and many many women with this condition go on to have healthy babies with or without help. Have your sisters consulted a fertility specialist? If not, this is the first thing they should do and sooner rather than later, their doctors should be able to refer them - in the first instance they will probably be given a pill called clomid - there are many threads on pcos and clomid on this site in 'trying to conceive' and 'long term trying to conceive' forums which provide huge amounts of information and lots of support. Whatever you all decide to do I wish you luck :flower:


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## Islas_mummy

I was told I couldn't have a baby naturally as I had PCOS and without trying I conceived :) In fact now my cycles have gone from approx 4 periods a year, to a regular 40-45 day cycle since having her :)

Good luck with all your journeys xxx


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