# Uk adoption



## spidergirl

Hi all after 5 years of trying for a baby and fail attemps of icsi, me and my husband have applyed to adopt. We got a phone call from local council saying that they will be coming to our house Wednesday for a chat. I was just wondering if anyone could let me know what will happen. We are really nervous, any help we would be very thankful xx


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## Lolly1985

They'll talk to you about modern adoption and the process. They'll ask you about why you want to adopt, ask about your childhood, family and support network. They will ask about your relationship. About your jobs and finances. They will want to know about your medical history, so if you have any medical conditions, and also about your fertility treatment and how it affected you. They need to make sure you have grieved and are mentally ready to move on to adoption. Finally they may well want to look around your house.

It sounds invasive but they won't want to take you on for an issue to come up down the line, they'll want to discuss everything briefly so any problems can be addressed early doors. I suggest you write down all significant dates, so when you got together, married, moved house, had treatment etc, as on the spot your mind will go blank. Well mine did!! Get some biscuits in and just be yourselves. They want to take you on and aren't there to catch you out, they just have to do their job.

Since we applied lots of changes have come into force so I hope all that still applies! Sure it will.

We also had three failed attempts and it's soul destroying, but once you get through that adoption is amazing and we found it a much more positive journey. In 3 and a half weeks we will meet our baby daughter who will be home the week after at 10 months. We couldn't be happier. It is all worth it! 

Why not come and join us on the chat thread?

Love Lolly xxx


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## Monkey78

Hi Spidergirl,
Lolly is right, I am a few months ahead of you, and the process has changed slightly (apparently on 1 July) but I think its the forms that have changed, and the speed in which they match you but from what Lolly has said its pretty much the same. We were really nervous about our first visit, and they do ask you lots of in depth questions about your childhood and relationship. I must admit on the first visit our SW was a little abrupt and scary, but at the end of it she said she was happy to put us forward for adoption. And after our first home visit she is really different, and friendly, and after speaking to couples on our workshop they all said the same thing. So dont be put off on the first visit as they are just doing their job, and once they know you they work with you and I have to say our second visit she was completely differnet, and we both really like her.

I too am on the adoption journey thread, there are some great people on there and its really good to hear all their stories and keep you uplifted with all their journeys.

Good Luck and stay strong, it is an emotional journey but very exciting too.

xxx


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## spidergirl

Hi and thank you both so much, I feel a lot less nervous now. I am excited and nervous all together. Thank you for your help and good luck to you both xx


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## TTC First

spidergirl said:


> Hi and thank you both so much, I feel a lot less nervous now. I am excited and nervous all together. Thank you for your help and good luck to you both xx

Don't worry, they are just looking for average people who can provide a loving home. They will ask a lot of questions however I doubt it will be in the first meeting. People talk about how horrible the process is and I got worried, but it wasn't truly all that bad. Eventually they do get into personal questions about your love live but I think that they are just as uncomfortable asking the questions as you are hearing them


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## Lolly1985

We got asked everything but very briefly. They discussed it all again but more in depth within the home study. Initial visit just made sure we ticked the boxes so to speak. Let us know how you get on spider xxx


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