# mmc at 19 weeks



## mdjoy

Hi lady's I have a question. I had just found out today that my baby died at 14 weeks, i am supposed to be 19 weeks. beside being devestated and sickened over the fact i have a dead baby in they did not do a d n C at the hospital. they are making me wait til my dr appt on tues, then i will still need to schedule one! Now i am distraught and concerned for my own health! the baby has been dead for 5 weeks in me. From what i have been reading that can cause serious issues after 4 weeks if not taken out. Has anyone been through this? Should I go to another hospital? I just can't believe this! I am supposed to be feeling my baby kick and holding him in my arms soon... :sad2:


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## SarahJane

I am so sorry but I can't answer your question as my situation was different as my baby was older and I was induced as soon as I could. Didn't want to R & R xxx

I am really sorry for your loss :hugs:


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## Sushai

:cry: I'm so sorry for your loss

I don't have any advice, but in sending you lots of :hugs:


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## jojo23

so sorry hun i had mmc at 22 weeks and i had to go through labour so im not sure what the procedure is when waiting for d&c... but im sure they wouldnt hav you waiting if it was a risk to your health and i think they normally like to give you a couple of days for it to sink in. i found out my little girl had died on a thursday and i didnt have her till the following wednesday and the midwives assured me it was ok and no risk to me. if your unsure maybe phone them tomorrow and tell them your concerns.

im so sorry you have to go through this and i can only hope that the coming weeks will pass quickly for you. we're all here to help you through everything and anything hun :hugs: to you and your family

sleep tight little angel xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## loz

im so sorry to hear about you loss its heartbreaking :(

i also had a mmc at 19 and baby was 14 weeks, they told me to take a tablet and go back in when i start to bleed, then i was taken into a loss bit on the maternity ward to give birth, they said baby is to big for d&c, i also thought baby would of been in a bad state and i thought i could of got sick from it but when i saw my baby she was in perfect condition and seing her put me and my oh at peace x


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## kiki04

OMG Hun I am so so so sorry :cry: I just had my d&c 3 weeks ago at 16+6. It was confirmed tues May 24 there was no HB, had one last u/s May 25th and they took baby on May 26th. Hadlee had died about 1-1.5 weeks earlier. 

Im so sorry you have to endure this pain :cry:


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## mdjoy

loz said:


> im so sorry to hear about you loss its heartbreaking :(
> 
> i also had a mmc at 19 and baby was 14 weeks, they told me to take a tablet and go back in when i start to bleed, then i was taken into a loss bit on the maternity ward to give birth, they said baby is to big for d&c, i also thought baby would of been in a bad state and i thought i could of got sick from it but when i saw my baby she was in perfect condition and seing her put me and my oh at peace x

I am sorry to hear about all theladies on here also. It is such a horrible thing to go through. I also had a m/c at 7 weeks but i think this is worse. Thedr told me at the er i will have to have a D&C done but wouldnt give me nothing there! Noe I have to wait til tues to even see a doctor then find out from there! This is just unbelievable. I really thought after 13 weeks i was in the clear. but for some reason the past two weeks i have been having a gut feeling something was very wrong with the baby. thought i was being paranoid but guess i was right after all.


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## ms.hope

I am so so sorry this happen to you! I lost my babies at 22 weeks and seems like I went through premature labour so babies (twin) made their way out on their own. How are you feeling otherwise? any cramping etc? It must be hard for you having to carry around the baby so long. See if anything can be done sooner--I heard someone on here say before something about your body rejecting the baby once baby has passed and in that case the dr wasted no time to get baby out.


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## Andypanda6570

Just my opinion but they should have did something immediately . 5 weeks is a long time to have your precious one inside you not alive, I am so sorry :cry::cry: My sister in law they think her little one was not alive for about 4 weeks but they did a D and E not a D and C both are very different procedures. They say when you are past 15 weeks they can't do a D and C only a D and E.

I guess Tuesday they will take care of this but please get in there on Tuesday and demand something be done right away. I can't believe how you must be feeling. I had to stay with my daughter dead in me for 3 days and it was awful.
I am so deeply sorry XOOOOXO :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## mommy2lilmen

Im sorry for your loss. :hugs:


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## Imalia

I would kick up a stink. I found out at 20+1 that our angel had been dead since somewhere between 16 and 17 weeks, I had already developed an anerobic infection in my uterus, cervix and vagina from the tissue necrosis, and I was induced within hours of finding out we'd lost our angel, when the infection cleared up on it's own without the need for any antibiotics.


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## daopdesign

I too had a missed m/c, I was 16 weeks along and was scheduled in to be induced 3 days later. The being sent home is the worst so I know how you must be feeling. You need to make sure you ask for a swab test to check for infection and I'm guessing they will do lots of bloody tests anyway. Soo sorry for you loss hope you're OK xxxx


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## mdjoy

I started having contractions yesterday and called my regular dr's office. the on call said to go to the hospital and she gave me the option of labor or d&c. She couldn't believe they sent me home like that! It is awful already to have known I was carrying a dead baby for weeks then to have them send me home like that. But my dr did reassure me risk of infection was low and gave me antibiotics. I chose the d&c. I feel bad but I just can't bare to see my little angel dead. I can't do that. She was very understanding. Even repeated the u/s for me before she did it upon my request. I think, maybe i should of see him or her. she did keep him until i decided. I couldn't do it. I want to think of my baby in my own way i guess, just not dead. I already felt bad enough. Sitting there waiting for movement, thinking maybe evry gas bubble was him or her in there, talking to the baby, rubbing my belly. Still had m/s and sore boobs and come to find out my lil one was gone already for 5 weeks! I miss my baby sooo much. I can't believe i am no longer pregnant. my m/c I had at 7 weeks in sept was horrible enough but as mean as it sounds this is worse. Like it was already formed and a baby and he or she died in me and I don't know why. She didn't see anything physically wrong with the baby and said we will have to see if pathology can tell. I feel so awful and can't help but to think maybe it was something I did. I know i shouldn't think like that but i can't help it. I keep trying to think of anything i did or ate or whatever at 14 weeks to see if anything contributed. But i just dont know :'(. I was going through alot of stress at that time and was moving out of state. I heard my babies hb at 12 wks and it was 160. I'm just so devestated and confused..


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## Khadijah-x

Im so so so so so so sorry huni :(

I didnt want to read and run xxx


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## Little Peanut

So tremendously sorry for your loss xxx 
Sending massive virtual hugs your way


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## mdjoy

Thank you all for your support. These forums really are a blessing for women in our situation. It seems like not many people around me understand what I am going through. It really helps being on here. The sad part though is to think just last week I was on the second tri forum. I guess it just takes time. I know one thing for sure is I am so preventing pregnancy in the future. I really can't handle this feeling, it is so awful. I read so many stories of woman who have been through this so many times over and over. I really commend them on their strength because I cannot go through another loss like this. And to hear about woman who go even further as some of you ladies have and to have stillborn babies. It is such a nightmare. I feel like the whole oh it's so rare that it won't happen to me thing is a joke now. It really is unbelievable to have this happen.


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## daopdesign

16 weeks along when my baby sadly passed and was induced for labour 3 days later. If the baby was measuring 16 weeks + they would most definitely not to a D&C. I know this is really really hard for you but I hope I can offer some support.

Having the D&C is probably better than you having to through the awful delivering of the baby. It was the hardest thing I've EVER :cry::cry: had to do. It's absolutely heat breaking when you find your LO no longer has a heart beat. I hope you get some answers and try to be strong. I know it's hard but you WILL get though this :nope::hugs:

I too always thought past 12 weeks you were safe. Just goes to show that anything could go wrong. I'm really sorry you're going through this x


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## mdjoy

daopdesign said:


> 16 weeks along when my baby sadly passed and was induced for labour 3 days later. If the baby was measuring 16 weeks + they would most definitely not to a D&C. I know this is really really hard for you but I hope I can offer some support.
> 
> Having the D&C is probably better than you having to through the awful delivering of the baby. It was the hardest thing I've EVER :cry::cry: had to do. It's absolutely heat breaking when you find your LO no longer has a heart beat. I hope you get some answers and try to be strong. I know it's hard but you WILL get though this :nope::hugs:
> 
> I too always thought past 12 weeks you were safe. Just goes to show that anything could go wrong. I'm really sorry you're going through this x

I am sorry to hear about your little one also. Yeah I was lucky to have the choice. I still get a lil sad that I didn't seethe baby but then I think that I really rather think of my baby inmy own way. My dr did mention that a little further along you do have to deliver. It is really awful to hear of everyone's loss on here. I just keep thinking, god not too long ago most of us were up on the pregnancy forums talkiing about how sick and moody we were and how excited to see our next u/s and all that pregnancy stuff and here we are talking about and mourning the losses of our little angels..just so sad :cry:


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## kiki04

I had my d&c at 16+6 and regret it so bad! I would have much rather delivered, seen and held my sweet Hadlee and I will never forgive myself for that :cry:


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## daopdesign

mdjoy said:


> daopdesign said:
> 
> 
> 16 weeks along when my baby sadly passed and was induced for labour 3 days later. If the baby was measuring 16 weeks + they would most definitely not to a D&C. I know this is really really hard for you but I hope I can offer some support.
> 
> Having the D&C is probably better than you having to through the awful delivering of the baby. It was the hardest thing I've EVER :cry::cry: had to do. It's absolutely heat breaking when you find your LO no longer has a heart beat. I hope you get some answers and try to be strong. I know it's hard but you WILL get though this :nope::hugs:
> 
> I too always thought past 12 weeks you were safe. Just goes to show that anything could go wrong. I'm really sorry you're going through this x
> 
> I am sorry to hear about your little one also. Yeah I was lucky to have the choice. I still get a lil sad that I didn't seethe baby but then I think that I really rather think of my baby inmy own way. My dr did mention that a little further along you do have to deliver. It is really awful to hear of everyone's loss on here. I just keep thinking, god not too long ago most of us were up on the pregnancy forums talkiing about how sick and moody we were and how excited to see our next u/s and all that pregnancy stuff and here we are talking about and mourning the losses of our little angels..just so sad :cry:Click to expand...

I started off in all the pregnancy forums then to have to visit the loss section was just unbelievable. You really don't think (although it's always on your mind really) that anything like this would happen to you. 3 weeks ago I gave birth to a little angel, my body seems all back to normal yet I can't and will never forget my son :sleep: It's still tough but staying focused and busy is helping me though it.:coffee:


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## daopdesign

kiki04 said:


> I had my d&c at 16+6 and regret it so bad! I would have much rather delivered, seen and held my sweet Hadlee and I will never forgive myself for that :cry:

Oh Kiki don't beat yourself up but I have to admit when I saw your story I couldn't believe you had a D&C seeing as we were like the same gestation and my doc never gave me an option other than labour (and lots of morphine lol). I think it's different in the US as in the UK 16+ labour only, I was 3 days off having a D&C! But I'm glad I got to see him but then again would it have been easier just having the surgery done. It's just one of them things I guess :hugs:


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## mdjoy

kiki04 said:


> I had my d&c at 16+6 and regret it so bad! I would have much rather delivered, seen and held my sweet Hadlee and I will never forgive myself for that :cry:

Yeah I kind of feel the same way. I think if the baby had just expired I probably would have. I was so nervous in what condition the baby would have been in seeing as he was gone for so long. A part of me regrets it but another part wants to think of my baby in my own way. Please forgive yourself though. It is a very hard time especially being so far along and I can understand the feeling of not wanting to see your baby dead. I hear some people are greatful they did, but I have known a few people who had been through this and wish they had options of a D&C because it was so hard to see there little one's like that. My biggest regret is to not of asked for an u/s pic the day they found out baby was gone because I couldn't look at the screen. Was too emotionally unstable for that at the time, but I now wish I could of had a pic for when I was ready to view it:cry: Maybe if we had chosen to give birth we woukd have regreted it. Try not to be so hard on yourself. You did at the time what was best for you. It is a very emotionally trying moment and very confusing at that...:hugs:


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