# Question about sex after mc. Careful TMI!



## steffi587

Hey there,

So if this is too personal for you, you obviously don't have to answer or continue reading ;-) but I was wondering if you could answer my questions.

How long did you guys wait to have sex after your miscarriage?
And do you think it's safe for me to have sex? Please read below to answer..

I had a D&C almost 1 1/2 weeks ago. My doctor told me I should wait two weeks to have sex but in all honesty, I can't wait much longer! I finally stopped bleeding and spotting two days ago and I have had the urge to be intimate with my husband for pretty much week. It's terrible! I can't think of anything else! I don't know if it's hormones or anything but I just want sex if you know what I mean. On top of that, my husband will be leaving for a month on Tuesday and according to doctor we shouldn't have sex until Wednesday. UGH! What should I do? I would use a condom too. Is it safe?
Sorry, but I just don't want to risk anything and I'm wondering if any of you ladies really waited that long.

Thank you for reading!


----------



## FarfromHome

Honestly, if they said two weeks I would wait two weeks...but I'm in the same boat you are ( Just had my D&C 1 week ago) and the Dr. said *TMI*"everything else" with Hubby is OK just nothing in the vagina for two weeks. Hope this helps a little bit.


----------



## Tina_TTC2

When I had my first MC, and had a D&C, I found out on our anniversary ( a thursday) and they scheduled a D&C the next morning (We had booked a cabin to celebrate our anniversary friday night). 

I had my D&C Friday Morning, and we kept the reservation - because -well - some time away -even a weekend - we thought would help.

I obviously couldn't do 'anything' that night, but, I did end up helping DH out. Now, this was the same day, and not that he pushed it or anything, but I could tell he wanted to and didn't really ask me, but I did anyhow. Now that i think about it, it was kind of crazy for me to do that - and -it may not have actually been friday night, it might have been the day after (not sure)... anyhow, sorry for Digressing :( 

My point is, you can definitely do 'stuff' and maybe some intimate things that don't require full (sorry TMI) insertion... There are 'ways' to get satisfaction without that exactly. LOL boy this feels a bit hmm.. can't find the words.. 

Anyhow - I do think I had the same problem last time - after a week or so - so I wonder if hormones ARE playing a part. 

Good luck to you!!


----------



## jennijunni

I had a D&E so a bit different, when I MC my 16w3d baby boy. I was having sex about 6 days later. My OB/MW said whenever I felt up to it. So go with your body. If you feel up to it, go for it. Hugs!


----------



## preston1988

i had sex as soon as i stopped bleeding, and found it highly uncomfortable and slightly painful! took a couple of weeks to actually get into the swing of things!! 
give it a go why not! might make u feel better being close to your partner!


----------



## Kanga86

Exactly what Preston said. I waited til the bleeding stopped, but found it quite painful. Hoping it gets better, don't know if it makes any difference but my cervic was still open and I have passed another small flesh clot (tmi) since then. Just do what feels right, also we used a condom just incase of infection risks so early on xx


----------



## bdawn8403

We had sex 2 days after I stopped bleeding but I didn't have a D&C, mine was natural. I don't know if that makes a difference or not but my NP said we could once the bleeding stopped but wanted us to wait to ttc for 2 cycles which we aren't haha

I didn't have any pain which was suprising but (TMI coming) I also had worked my way up to my husband the night before, if you know what I mean. Which I would recommend trying (unless your against that sort of thing) and of course use a condom with it. It may help you determine if you're ready, also you can control it.


----------



## mum2beagain

when i had a d and c i was just told when ever i felt ready after the bleeding had stopped xx


----------



## Jessabelle

I had an erpc and was also told to wait for two weeks. Its basically the same procedure as the d&c. They say to wait to weeks because there is a very high risk of infection if anything is inserted into the vagina. My friend had an infection after her d&c and it wasn't pleasant so I would really recommend following your doctors instructions on this one. 
Personally I waited 4 weeks because I couldn't stand the thought of having anything up there. It was more of an emotional thing than anything else. I just wasn't ready. Despite whether you feel emotionally ready, I would wait two weeks anyway. Let your bits heal! x


----------



## steffi587

Thank you for all the replies! 

I think I'm going to give it a go tonight sorry if TMI. I just feel like I'm ready and if it turns out that I'm not then that's okay too. It's just so difficult having to wait if you want to be close to your partner. I feel like to me, it's part of the healing process! 
Thanks again!


----------



## blueskai

This sounds awful, but rightly or wrongly I felt I needed to have sex the day after...I was in such a bad dark horrible place and I just needed to feel close to my OH. I had a lot of pain during though, and still do get pain but i think its down to ovarian cysts.

xo


----------



## KateC

I had sex before my doctor gave me the go-ahead. They like for you to stop bleeding after the D&C before having sex, just to reduce chance of infection. But if you feel ready, then you feel ready. 

As some others have mentioned, intimacy was an important part of my healing. You needn't be ashamed if you're craving it. It will bring you closer to your partner again and give you comfort.


----------

