# No Fetal Pole or HB @ 6-weeks



## Interlude

Hello all! 

I am 43-ys old, This is my first pregnancy and we conceived naturally. 

As we were not planning on getting pregnant I originally thought I had just gained weight over the holidays mainly in my midsection. When I started to notice the signs and skipped my period I went to a doctor immediately. (FYI: He is not an OBGYN)

He confirmed I was indeed pregnant and instead of being happy for me he seemed concerned. The only positive thing he said, (if you want to take it as positive) was "At 43 you should be happy this happened at all" His tone was not exactly uplifiting.

He scheduled the HcG test of which I had 23,000 levels and than I went for my first U/S. It came back with a yolk sack with no fetal pole or heartbeat at what he is assuming as 6-weeks. He immediately told me to get a D&C. Keep in mind all of this; the confirmation, testing, U/S and mention of D&C were done in just over 48 hours!!

To add insult to misery he said that at my age all my eggs are bad and that since the sack was empty that meant that myself and my husband must have chromosomal issues, and that even though I was lucky I even got to this point I should just do the D&C and realize it would never happen again. 

We were devastated and shocked. To hit such high highs and low lows in less than 2 days is horrendous. I told him no I did not want to schedule a D&C and demanded a second U/S. I plan on scheduling that second U/S in the next 14 days and within that time I plan on getting a second opinion.

I feel fine - no bleeding, no dizziness, no other red-flag signs of miscarriage. I refuse to believe that I do not have a chance. I have gotten this far and this must of been meant to be. I refuse to give up on my baby at just 6-weeks, which by the way we are not 100% sure is even an accurate date as I cannot remember the exact day of my LMP or when I ovulated. 

I know it is not common to get pregnant at my age, but I know it does happen and healthy babies are born. 

I just need some reassurance from women my own age that have been or are going through this same thing.

Thank you for listening. I am trying my best to stay positive.


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## Borboleta

Hi Interlude,

Reading your story made me so angry :growlmad:! Why we older moms are so mistreated like that!!! Your doctor is a very insensible person. I would give up on him and look for another one. You are not old to have babies. So many woman in here have babies over fourty. Even though I was 38 when I had my first I am thinking about maybe ttc again after I turn 40 this year. We have another thread in another area of bb for over 35 first time mommies, and one of the mommies there had her first with 44 years old. So perfectly possible. Like you I would wait and go to another u/s in two weeks. I have a friend that is 30 years old and she went to have her u/s at 7 1/2 weeks and they didn't find the heartbeat either. 6 weeks is early. 
Will be praying for you and let us know how it goes:). :thumbup:


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## mommatoB

hi hun. we couldn't see any hb until I was 6wks 5 days! gl :)


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## Jamandspoon

Hello... That is shocking behaviour by your doctor, I would be making a serious complaint about that Doctor and finding yourself someone else ASAP!!! I wouldn't be doing anything based on no fetal pole at 6 weeks, I have been scanned every week since 4 weeks 6 days because of previous history and at 5 weeks 6 days I saw a gestational sac and *possibly* a yolk sac, went back at 6+6 and bubs was there with HB. I have had a blighted ovum, where no baby ever appeared in the sac, and my obstrician and ultrasound chappy refused to formally diagnose that until the gestational sac had reached 16mm or I got to 8 weeks, even after all of that I had to go back 1 week later for another scan before they would even consider scheduling a D&C, your doctor is talking absolute rubbish! Here in France they don't consider woman to be in the "older" category until they hit 45. Don't listen to the doctor, go get yourself a decent doctor, have a proper scan to out your mind at rest..

Take good care :hugs:


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## vintage67

Hello. I am 45 years old and I gave birth to my son in November 2011 at the age of 44.

Yes, most of our eggs are bad, but not all of them. I went through 3 miscarriages on the way to get our son. I wish the best for you from this conception but even if it doesn't stick, all hope is not lost. You conceived once and you can conceive again if you desire. 

Best wishes to you.


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## Interlude

Thank you all for your kind words, support and experience. This weekend was filled with me worrying myself sick. 

I have another appointment this Friday 2/22/13 with a new doctor and I hope to get better, much happier news. And, even if I do not get the news I desire, I hope that this new doctor has better empathy skills. 

I will keep you posted. Thank you again for the hope. :)


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## dan-o

Good luck for today, far too early to be writing anything off and rushing into a D&C!!


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## maybebaby3

Hope you get good news today :hugs:


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## Lady H

Terrible. Any news?


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## Oasis717

I was absolutely horrified to read how you had been treated by this so called "doctor" and I use the term doctor loosely, how dare he treat you like that? I'm lost for words, can you imagine if you'd taken him at his word? How many other poor women has he treated like this and I wonder how many babies were lost thanks to his premature diagnosis? I'm so sorry you had to go through that but I applaud you for standing your ground and getting a second opinion , 6 weeks is super early, my doctor doesn't usually promote scans before 8 weeks precisely for the reason that it is so early and a misdiagnosis can easily be made, as a mature mum I'm really fed up of being written off by the medical profession, there are so many success stories. Loads luck hunni, rooting for you:) xxxxx


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## mommatoB

any news hun?


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## Hopethisyear

Wow, I can't believe your Dr. talked to you like that. I would look for a new Dr if I was you. What a rude and insensitive person. I think you are smart to get a second opinion and not do a D&C. 6 weeks is very early to see a heartbeat. I hope everything turns out ok for you!


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## heyluu

Almost the same thing happened to me. I went in at 6+ 2 for bleeding and had high HCG levels and only a gets sac and yolk sac...nothing else. They diagnosed me with a partial molar and talked to me about a d and c. I said no and that I'd wait two weeks. Just went back in today at 8 2 and found little bean with heart flickering away.


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## Oasis717

Thank god you didn't listen heyluu, I'm so pleased for you, what a wonderful outcome xxxx


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## heyluu

I tend to be a little stubborn that way. Sometimes it's a good thing! My hubby is pissed that they put us through so much worry though. It's been a hellish two weeks...well worth it though. Seeing that heartbeat was priceless!!


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## pipsbabybean

Ooo stalking for an update ?


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## Oasis717

I dont blame your dh, it doesn't bear thinking about, if you'd taken their advice. With me and my blighted ovum I had two further scans after it was diagnosed just to make absolutely sure, I can't believe they were talking about a d & c already, you wonder sometimes how these people call themselves professionals! Xx


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