# Hey!



## Confused_1984

Hello Everyone,

This is all new to me and i can't quite still believe that i'm posting in a baby forum.... :shock: 

I'm 22 and need all the advice and support you mummy's and 
mummy's-to-be can give me!!

Thanks xxx


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## Jo

Hiya and welcome to the Forum :D 

you've come to the right place for advice and support, ask away :D


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## ablaze

hiya and welcome to the forum!! im yvanne!! im away 2 b 20 and have 2 kids!!!


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## Confused_1984

Gosh i admire you so much Yvanne!

Thanks a lot girls...hopefully you can help me make he biggest decision in my life!!

xxxx


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## ablaze

you say your main concearn is money and housing, do you work? x


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## Confused_1984

Yes i work but i work in a tiny office - manily me in by myself most of the time. So it wouldnt be possible for me to get the time off that i require... And i've only worked here for 9 months.


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## ablaze

are you self employed or do you have an employer because by law you are entitled to maternity leave, even if you havent been in the company for a year you would get a maternity allowance.


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## Confused_1984

No i have an employer.

Im terrible with confrontation and dont want to feel like i'm letting anyone down...

He's been very good to me and pays me a good wage...

I know he'll be dissapointed.


But then i suppose...accidents happen and it's life...


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## ablaze

pregnancy and having children is a truly wonderfull experience, but no1 can make the decision for you! it is something you need 2 think about alot i mean its not as if you have the baby and thats it its year upon years of work, i think you should get to your docs and see how far along you are etc, they will also go over your options with you :hugs:


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## Confused_1984

Thanks....I dont think anything can prepare you for how much hard work it is...unless obviously you've experienced it yourself.

I'm off to a clinic tonight to see about how far i am....pretty sure i'm about 6/7 weeeks.

thanks again x


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## ablaze

keep us updated, hope everything goes ok 4 u :hugs:


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## Lauz_1601

welcome im sure you'll get lots of advice and support here to help you make your desicion, no one will judge you in any way we just hope you right make the right descsion that will make you happy!

You will be entitiled to maternity leave of 26 weeks, Im sure your employer will understand, sounds like you have a good working relationship Im sure he/she will be happy for you. 

I had my daughter at 19, It wasnt planned but now I wouldn't change a thing, she's the best thing in our life couldnt imagine life without her! Yes sometimes it can be hard work - actually thats a lie Ella is so good Iv had it easy  but the positives definatly outweigh any negatives. 

were here for any questions you have. hope it goes well at the clinic.


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## Confused_1984

Aww thanks Lauz.

Luckily i've got a very supportive boyfriend and parents which makes me think - i could actually do this if i wanted to...

As im sure most of you know (!) it's a very daunting and scary thought.

As for my boss understanding...i doubt it, but he'll have no choice if i decide to go through with this!

Not sure if it'd be wise to offer redundancy...?


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## KX

Hi and welcome to the forum. I was 22 when I found out I was pg with Rebecca, but had her just after I turned 23.

I was and still am in the same job, I was terrified about telling my boss, I thought I was going to get sacked, but when you think about it they can't really do that as it's discrimination and could lead to a tribunal.

Lots of thoughts and feeling go through you when you first find out, I was upset and very scared. We will all be here for you :D 

PS Parenthood has been the biggest shock to me and OH. Unlike Laura's Ella, Rebecca is not an easy baby, and never has been. She is a monster-in a nice way, but the best thing in our life :lol: 

xxx


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## Confused_1984

Thanks KX.

It's such a comfort to hear girls that have been in the same situation!

My work is my biggest fear and telling my boss....even though it should be the least of my worries!

My colleague who is only in every Wednesday should be quite helpful...once she's over the initial shock...she's got two kids of her own, think she had the first at about 26 years old.

oh well....all in good time!

xxx


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## Wobbles

Hi :wave:

Welcome to BabyandBump 

Sounds like your going through the emotions a bit & in time I hope you do what is best for you - Your boss is the least of your worries or as you say should be this is YOU hun not your boss women have babies every day.

Wishing you luck in whatever decision is best for you

:hugs:


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## Confused_1984

Thanks Wobbles.

Yeah and he should be old enough to understand that thing's like this do happen and it's all part of life!

xxx


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## Wobbles

Sounds like your a loyal member of his staff so I do hope he surprises you with best wishes :D


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## Confused_1984

Now that would be nice! Let's hope he does! Will keep u up-to-date! xxx


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## Cat

Hi Confused, welcome to the forum.

About your fear of telling your oss, if its cause its a small company and your concerned about it being an inconvenience to him. Although he pays your maternety allowence (which now for babies due after the 1st of April is 39weeks) he claims it back from the tax office, so it not really putting im out, he will just have to employ someone to cover your leave.
Dont even start worrying about taking redundancy you really dont need to and so long as your have been with your employer since the start of your pregnancy your entitled to full maternety leave.


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## Confused_1984

Thanks cat. That really does help. I think once i've come to terms with it myself i'll find it easier.

He's in no position to make me feel uncomfortable during this, as he could be punished for it...

The more people tell me things will go ok with work the more confident i feel leading up to telling him - so thanks!

xxx


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## Tam

Hello :hi:

Welcome to the forum!

Wishing you a very healthy & happy pregnancy! x


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## twinkletoes

hiya chick x


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## stephlw25

Hi, welcome to the forum, im also 22 and have a 15 month old son :)


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## Caroline

Hello and welcome. Hope everything goes ok speaking to your boss.


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## ImTheDaddy

*Hi there Confused_1984,

Just remember what your mother told you about not takling to strangers.

Read through the Forum, you'll spot the Strange Ones, then you know who to ignore or stay away from.

If your still confused about the ones to avoid let me know, I know them all!!*


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