# Day nurseries and special needs children



## BabyBoo36

I'm 23 weeks pregnant with a little one with SB occulta/meningocele (not the worse type.) We've been told Boo has a 60% chance of no problems, and a 40% chance of bladder/bowel problems, mild muscle weakness and mild hydrocephalus. I've done some research and know that the 40% is actually a very real possibility. We may need to catheterise, manage bowels with meds, manage a shunt, and have problems with mobility. (I'm sorry if I sound very cold and matter-of-fact over this, but it is my only way of coping at the mo.)

I will have to go back to work after a year. Financially we have no choice. I am the main wage earner and although we don't live in excess (terraced house, 1 car etc) DH's wages alone would not cover everything. DH works 4 long days, I currently work 8-5 in health care. I'm planning on dropping a day so Boo would only need childcare 3 days a week. I've already put Boo on waiting list for the Busy Bees nursery on my hospital site because them if I do need to catheterise/do meds, I'm on site and can go and do it. We haven't mentioned the special needs yet, because in all honesty, until Boo's born, we don't know what they are! Once we know, we will obviously have to tell them.

In people's experience can and do nurseries refuse children places for special needs? I don't know what we'll do if they do.


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## mom22boys

Since you live in the UK I don't know but in the US that is discrimination so we cannot unless the school/ daycare does not have a nurse on staff. 

I would think since you are going to go do it yourself they would gladly take your child!


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## Emmea12uk

A nursery is not allowed to refuse on the basis of special needs. They are not even allowed to refuse to catheterise if training is provided by urology. Sb should not present a problem to a child going to nursery in anyway. By law they have to include all children to the same degree as long as their needs are being met.

You will find as well that got a mild sb, a nursery is a good thing. Keeping the child mixed with all abilities will promote confidence and inspire them to do the things their peers do even if they find it harder. If they cant do something then it builds into them acceptance.

Do you know about all the financial help you are entitled to before you go back to work and after? You ate entitled to dla - middle rate or higher rate if baby has a shunt and catheters. You are entitled to carer's allowance if higher rate. Also child tax credits with a big disability bonus if higher.

A brief breakdown of what I get as a married couple earning over the normal benefit threshold:

Dla high rate- £500 per month
Carer's - £200 ish per month
Child tax cred - £85 per week
Child Ben - £20 ish per week 

When you go back to work, child tax credit will reduce and you won't get carer's but you will still get the rest. You may also be entitled to working tax credits. You also get help from local authority for things like childcare and respite. You can on top of that get grants for anything you need (depending on income) as a result of the disability. For example, driving lessons and exams if you are a carer, a washing machine and tumble dryer for incontinence and other equipment. Some areas also have special funds for things like holidays.

I think most people can get by on this financial help. You can start to apply for these things straight away after birth.

I hope that helps. If you need anything - I am a fountain of knowledge:)


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## Emmea12uk

Oh and the best one stop shop for financial advice and dignposting to other services is 'contact a family'. Look them up on google and they have a helpline. They are excellent and can even help you do all the applications and things.


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## capel

Emmea12uk said:


> You are entitled to carer's allowance if higher rate.

You can also get carers allowance if middle rate as I had it before. I am not sure though if you need mobility as well.

Many bouroughs have early intervention centres for children when they are 1-2 years old. They are great, and all staff is trained in any need your child may have. And I know that in some bouroughs there is a free early education for special needs children. My daugther was offered a nursery place when she was 2. I did not accept because they wanted her to stay with the babies as they said that if she was with the children of her age she could be hurt. I thouth that it was discrimination and would not want my child in a place like that. Always check how the nursery/school treat special needs children (once I asked the deputy head teacher of a very good school in my bourough if they had many special needs children on roll. Her answer "we don't have many of those" in a tone that made me want to punch her. Needless to say no child of mine would ever go to that school.)

They can't refuse care to a child if there is training but that sometimes is hard to get, unless the child has a statement and those come when they are 3. I know a diabetic child and mum has to go to nursery every lunchtime to bolus her pump as noone in nursery is prepared to do that. As she works close she can do that. It all depends on the needs. The wrong dose of insulin can kill a child, it may be too much responsability for someone not trained to do that.


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## BabyBoo36

Thanks Emma and Capel. My boss has said that once we know what Boo's needs are, she will contact the child care co-ordinator for our hospital, and do everything she can to ensure I get a place in the on-site nursery. Then, even if they're not prepared to catheterize, I can go and do it.

Emma, thanks for the message about finances - I just assumed we wouldn't be entitled to anything as we both work. That's def something I'll look into. I hope you're feeling better and more rested - thanks for all the questions of mine you've patiently answered and good luck for your scan xx


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## Emmea12uk

No problem! Any time! 

Thank you! Tom had an extra day at school today so I rested up!


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## BabyBoo36

Nice one! He's so cute on the picture. Have the bh stopped now you've managed to rest? x


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## Tegans Mama

Emma is right about day nurseries not legally being able to refuse a child a place because they have special needs. 

Emma, why is your DLA £500 a month??? We get higher rate for T which is just under £300 a month. 

I must add BabyBoo, if your child is "best case scenario" for a child with occulta, it's very unlikely they will qualify for DLA and therefore won't qualify for carers allowance or the disability element of CTC. A child with no/little mobility issues who has no bladder/bowel problems and no shunt is, in essence, a healthy child. :)


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## Emmea12uk

Um... Dont know.... Maybe I am wrong but it is more than £400 I think


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## Tegans Mama

Emmea12uk said:


> Um... Dont know.... Maybe I am wrong but it is more than £400 I think

Could you check and let me know please? Because something is wrong somewhere if it is :lol:


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## Emmea12uk

Righty o!


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## Tegans Mama

Ta :) x


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## Emmea12uk

383


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## Emmea12uk

I think still


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## Tegans Mama

:wacko: HIgher rate is £71.40 a week. Which is £285 a month, so you are being overpaid by £100 a month if you are getting £383 :lol:


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## Lottie86

How strange you get £383 a month Emma, have you always got that? We get the same amount as you Lea.


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## capel

Do you get mobiity component? I get middle rate care + higher mobility and that adds up to around £400


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## Tegans Mama

capel said:


> Do you get mobiity component? I get middle rate care + higher mobility and that adds up to around £400

No she doesn't, her son is under 3.


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## Emmea12uk

I got paid it today and it was £290 ish


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