# Reasonable?



## ClairAye

Me and FOB split up 3 months ago tomorrow, he's seen the kids about 10 times since. The last two times he asked to see them I said no (there are times he's seen them once then f*cked off for weeks or times where he just doesn't bother showing up, I said no last time because he said on Wednesday he was too ill to see them but my dad saw him outside the pub) So he's saying I'm finding any excuse to stop him seeing them (!?!?!) and if I want him to go to a solicitor he will. I offered him one day a week at a certain time, if he doesn't show after 30 minutes he's given up his day with them. He hasn't replied to it though. Is this reasonable? My 8 month old doesn't know who he is and he's let them down SO much before.

Thanks.


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## Natasha2605

I think that's more than reasonable.


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## Karren

More than reasonable!

If he isn't bothering properly it's his loss.


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## Mummy1995

Definitely reasonable hun x


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## ClairAye

Well I didn't even get a reply...


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## Rhio92

ClairAye said:


> Well I didn't even get a reply...

He sounds like an idiot... xx


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## ClairAye

You're not half right there :dohh:


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## Dezireey

Yeah, you are doing the right thing. Any Dad that messes around with his kids emotions and is flaky about showing up etc doesn't deserve them and doesn't deserve many chances.


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## Ceejay123

.


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## Kayley

Let him go pay for a solicitor! Pretty sure it will be an empty threat and if it isn't then he will lose money and probably not get any where any way x


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## ClairAye

No reply! He's away with the Army Reserves until the 20th but I think he blocked my number again so not sure if he got it ;)

No one I've told (that actually knows him and what he is like) thinks he will pay out for it! Me included but have to be prepared!

Sometimes I think he says it to keep up apperances with his girlfriend or something.


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## kirsteen

he's a knob. Dont worry about the solicitors, aslong as you have given him reasonable consistant contact, reasons for it and can show this then they will probably not give a damn. FOB always threatened to go to solicitors with me, they basically said get it sorted through family mediation if we HAD to, but as far as they can see I've tried and he's just being a twat (in different words haha) xx


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## taylor197878

sounds like ma ex we have been seprated for over a year now and I did set up contact through a lawyer as he was nasty at the begening now over a year on he picks the kids up every 2 weeks not every time he supposed to have them my youngest daughter is neary 4 and she doesn't know who he is he is in and out her life, too be honest my lawyer has told me to stop contact but a don't have the heart too....


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## ClairAye

It's been over a month since he saw them. Still no reply to my offer. He lives 30 seconds away yet doesn't come wanting to see them. :shrug:


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## Mummy1995

Thats so sad :( x


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## ClairAye

I just don't get how some girl he hardly knows (they've been together and known each other (if what he told me is true) like 4 months) can suddenly come before them :nope:


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## ClairAye

Also Child Maintenance phoned yesterday and it's STILL not set up, apparently they're having a hard time getting proof from him about what he is up to work/college wise :/


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## Mummy1995

It makes ni sense :( what?! Why dont they go to hmrc?! Or is it different in Scotland? X


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## ClairAye

Got told today there is no current record of him on HMRC!? &#128556;


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## Mummy1995

Omg!! Report the employer xx


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## ClairAye

He doesn't work anymore :/


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## Mummy1995

Oh for goodness sake. What a joke! You can get some of his benefits though surely? X


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## ClairAye

Apparently he goes to college to gets a bursary and no benefits! No one can get hold of him either, he's such a loser!!


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## baileybubs

Oh I'm sorry hun, I dont know how men can behave like this towards their children, I was gonna reply saying you are being totally reasonable as I have just told my ex the exact same thing, he has them Tuesdays 10-8 and that's all I expect, if he wants to see them more he just has to ask (not likely) and if he is late then I take them out and he misses his day with them. 
But from the sounds of it your ex is just being a complete tool. Sorry hun :hugs:


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