# Dealing with a miscarriage without a partner.



## estewart88

When I found out I was pregnant it was a huge shock as I wasn't planning on having a baby and I wasn't in a relationship with the father. When I told him about it he didn't want me to continue with the pregnancy but I had already bonded with this baby, I had already been thinking of names, looking at clothes, imagining my life with this baby. I told him that despite what he wanted, I would be continuing with the pregnancy. He tried and tried to convince me what a mistake I was making, how I had no idea how hard it was going to be to be a single parent because he couldn't help me out etc.. of course I had thought of all these things but I didn't care. Planned or not, I loved my baby. 

2 days later I was in hospital as I suspected I was having a miscarriage. I texted him to tell him and got no response from him. 4 texts I sent him before getting anything out of him which was "You should know I hope you're ok" How would I know if he didn't tell me?? At this point I was told the baby was fine, I got to see the scan and I got to see his little heartbeat which is a moment I will remember for the rest of my life. When the nurse was first looking at the US she couldn't see a heartbeat and turned the screen for me to see. She started off the sentence "I'm sorry.." before being interupted by his tiny little heartbeat as soon as I looked at him. I like to think he was kept alive for a little longer so I could see him. Sounds silly but that thought is helping me through everything. After that, things got worse and a week later another scan confirmed I had lost the baby. When I told the father he said he knew that's not what I wanted, he hoped I was ok but that he was relieved. What kind of man tells someone who has just lost their baby that he is relieved??? 

Even though I am so angry at this guy for the way he has treated me through all of this, part of me, for some reason, still feels like I need him to help me through this. Even though he wanted no part of the baby's life and doesn't care about what happened it was still his baby and the one I shared that with. Other people have been there to support me but it just doesn't feel the same as having the father's support. My ex boyfriend has been a great help and at one point he said he wishes it had been his baby because even though he'd have lost it he would have known better how to help me through this. I just wish I had the same level of sympathy from the baby's father. 

I think this was just more a rant than anything, it's the first time I've sat down and let these feelings out but if anybody has been through similar it would be great to hear how you coped.


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## ElaineG

Your story sounds so much like mine...Text after text during my MC was the same thing your man said. I went through 12 hours of labor only to end in an emergency d&c and then back in the ER the next day with an allergic shock reaction to the anesthesia and then again 2 days later with an infection
Even tonight I finally poured my heart and soul and tears into a conversation with him and he ends it with "You just can't stop being so dam dramatic" And yet I still feel like I need him as well, but I think it's the shock of one loss and the fear of losing him completely so that I can never have that chance for that next baby again..

I try to find reason in all of this, my next step is to start anti-depressants, I'm slowly losing me through all of this... I've been two days without sleep, on pain meds, not eating and he gives me this...
I like to think there is a special place in Gods garden for men like him to labor away the fruits of there ill will toward us who needed them so while they watch us prosper and grow and get that happiness they denied us so much..

Know you're not alone, though I can't offer you much in the way of answers as they seem to escape me when I need them most, if nothing else a touching story similar to your own and a hug might give you comfort in your grief


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## pooh_bear

Hi

I just want to say I am going through something very similar except I was in a seemingly loving, happy, commited relationship - when I discovered I was pregnant my boyfriend wasn't supportive at all. He was like a rabbit in the headlights when I told him and made it clear he wasn't ready to be a father. I felt so alone and disappointed especially as he had been the one talking about 'our amazing future together, growing old together and marriage and children etc.' I told him he could walk away if he didn't want to be with me for the right reasons but once he got his parents approval (they were desperate for grandchildren) he changed his tune and was promising me everything and saying how he couldn't imagine his life without me and wanted us to be a family. I was cautiously optimistic but it all went pear shaped when I had opinions and didn't just dance to his tune. :( We had a huge argument and I never heard from him since. It broke my heart that while I was carrying his child I didn't even get as much a text message or phone call to see how I was doing. :( In the meantime I ended up in a&e worried I was having a miscarriage - after various tests I was so relieved when they told me all was fine with the pregnancy although my own health was quite poor (very anaemic etc.) I was determined to be healthy and give my baby the best chance. I was so ready to be a mum and couldn't have been happier despite no support from him. I had the love and support of my family and friends. A few days later I had an early scan and while everything looked fine (I was elated when I saw that tiny wee heartbeat - it all felt so real and my heart could have burst with love and happiness) the sonographer mentioned she had concerns that the gestational sac looked small and was approx a week behind the foetus. :( I came away panicking I would have a miscarriage and scared for my next scan 10days later incase there wouldn't be a heartbeat. My family and friends kept telling me to be strong and positive and to focus on the heartbeat - I was trying to be positive but scared to get my hopes built up incase the worst happened. Sadly a few days later my worst fear was realised when I had a miscarriage. My heart is broken and I just feel so very lost and empty. When the doctor confirmed I had lost the baby (I found it so hard to see my empty womb after seeing that little heratbeat just 4 days earlier) he started to give me advice on when I could start trying again. I got so upset as that obviously isn't an option for me and it just compounded my sadness and loss. 

Just like your own experience, the father of my baby didn't want to know - I even called him from the hospital when I was in a very bad way to say things were not looking good and I that I thought he may want to know. I got a cold, offensive text message at 10pm the following evening basically saying 'hope you are bearing up and thanks for letting me know'. It was the final insult - I was suffering so much both physically and emotionally and he behaves like I am suffering from a cold :( I sent him a long email - it was for closure - and again got a cold, harsh, nasty reply that just proves he could never have loved me and sadly for me it took something as painful and horrific as losing a baby to see his true colours.

I am glad you have support but my advice is to avoid this guy for your own sanity because the way I see it - a man who cannot love and support you when you are carrying his baby is NOT the right man for you. I once gave my friend a card that said 'NO MAN IS WORTH YOUR TEARS....AND THE ONE WHO IS WON'T MAKE CRY' and that is so true. I know when you are pregnant with a man's child it does strengthen the bond between you and at my lowest point when I started to lose the baby I just craved his arms around me and kept thinking back to all of the happy times we shared (as recently as a few weeks before) and it was torture. However as I try to build myself up and surround myself with the people who truly love me, I know I had a lucky escape from a guy who loved himself too much to ever love me or a wee innocent baby. It breaks my heart but guys like these are not worth our tears.

This forum has helped me SO much as you know other women are in a similar situation and truly can relate to what you are going through in ways that other people couldn't possibly understand. I know how hard it is to go through this without a partner - I do wish I was in a loving, commited relationshio with a good man so I could try again but I am trying to keep the faith and know that I now have my special little angel in heaven watching over me.

Thinking of you hun and sending hugs and strength your way.
PM me anytime - its good to talk. x


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## pooh_bear

ElaineG - I just read your post after I submitted my reply to estewart. I am SO sorry to hear what you've been through. That guy sounds like a waste of space and to abandon you just when you needed him most shows what a cruel, heartless, selfish person he is. I believe in karma but right now am struggling to get my head around it as it seems the genuine people get hurt while the selfish ones prosper. Argh!! I don't know how these poor excuses for men can sleep in their beds at night. I like your garden analogy and hope that one day we will find the love and happiness we deserve. Clearly these guys were not right for us - you find who really cares about you when you are at your lowest point and if the person you love can't support you then, he isn't worthy to be with you. One of my favourite quotations (I seem to be full of quotes today!) is by Marilyn Monroe : 

"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." &#8212; Marilyn Monroe. 

And that is true....if someone can't be there through the hard times then they sure don't deserve the good times either.

Thinking of you and sending you lots of hugs x


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## Rachb1987

im sorry you are going through this ladies :) i was in a similar situation earlier this year and at the time you think you will never get over how they treated you...never trust another man...never move on....but trust me you will :) you will never forget this...but u will grow and learn from it. you are all 100 times better than these men, and deserve so much more! these men dont deserve to be fathers or deserve to have your love. i agree with pooh-bear..i believe in karma, and sooner or later it will come round to bite them on the ass.

right now u need to concentrate on gettin yourself better...surround yourself with positive and supportive people, and use this forum as mush as you can to let off any steam...believe me it really helps. feel free to PM me anytime, and i will give as much support and advise as i can :) love to you all xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## aviolet

I'm so sorry for your loss and that you've had to go it alone.

I wasn't with the father either - in fact when i told him i as pregnant he asked if i was getting an abortion. :wacko: by that point i'd already miscarried, so i corrected him and he acted all sympathetic, but i know he didn't care. i know he was happy to hear "it" was "gone". he didn't even believe it was his. but just 24 hours before telling him, i'd gone thru a horrific experience ALONE, losing the baby. i was still bleeding and it was concerning me. but when i'd text him about it, he ignored me. even ignored when i asked his opinion on a name (i was determined to give this child an identity so that others understood she WAS a baby, not just "cells" or a "fetus" or whatever other term they want to use). I even sent him a certificate with her name on it (and his last name and my last name) to make it a little more real to him. But after that I let him be. Fact was he couldn't be the man I needed him to be.

When we lose a baby, we lose a piece of ourselves, we lose what we helped create, and therefore we feel the only person who can help us grieve is the one who should be grieving with us. yes it helps to talk about it to people who understand, helps to have support of family and friends, BUT there's only one man who should be feeling your loss in the same way you are, and he's MIA. It is SO hard, i looked for any man who could be a "replacement" but male friends just couldn't cut it, and no one was gonna love this baby like I did. they would feel sad FOR me because i feel sad, but they won't feel sad WITH me, y'know? 

Unfortunately i just had to ride it out alone. after almost a year i decided i had enough of being the only one to remember. I wanted to make sure Justice would live on with her father as well. So I wrote him a letter, told him how I felt and that I wanted to know he would be thinking of her on her birthday. I wanted nothing more, because we could have nothing more. This wasn't some kind of trap or gameplaying, it was my heart on my sleeve, saying I need to know in order for ME to move forward with my life, I had to know he cares, because I couldn't take being alone anymore.

And he came through. I think he grew up a lot in that year, he recognized that it was true grief i was going through and he told me he would remember.

At that point that's all that mattered, and that point it was enough to give me the peace i'd been desiring that whole year long. He couldn't give me the support I needed, he wasn't the man he should have been. But i was thankful that in spirit he would be thinking of her with me. i wouldn't have found that out though if i hadn't been straight forward - no sugar coating, no roundabout way of asking - just flat out, THIS is what I need, are you going to give me that? 
it makes me wonder if i'd been that straight forward when it happened would things have been different? But i know in my heart that's probably not true - he could say what he did now because time had passed and he'd also come to terms with it.

I hope something can happen that will give you the peace that i received. i wanted so much for a whole year to have what i couldn't in that man, that by the time he said he would never forget it was all i needed to feel complete again.

hugs for you hun, it will be a difficult road, but this is a great support site. :hugs:


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## Mumof42009

So sorry what you've had to go through :hugs:, If you need anything at all just pm me anytime. I split with my oh just when found out I had lost my twins and it's so hard xx


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## Angel.Mummy

hi, i went through similar to you, when i toldd the father he just laughed and said it wasn't possible as he wasn't ready to be a dad. tbh i wasn't ready to be a mum either as i was only 14 but i had already fell in love with the little life i had inside me. when i had my mc the father said he was glad that it was over. it was actual the fathers cousin who helped me through quite alot tbh, 

sorry for your loss, i'm always here if you need to talk. :hugs:


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## greeneyes0279

So sorry for your loss. :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:


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## estewart88

Thanks for all the replies. :hugs: Although I hate to think that anybody has been through this too it helps in a way to know I'm not the only one!



aviolet said:


> we feel the only person who can help us grieve is the one who should be grieving with us. yes it helps to talk about it to people who understand, helps to have support of family and friends, BUT there's only one man who should be feeling your loss in the same way you are, and he's MIA.

This is exactly how I feel! The thing is, I had come to terms with him wanting nothing to do with the baby when it was born. I accepted it was going to be hard to raise a child by myself, harder than I could imagine. I had spent the whole time I was pregnant thinking about these things and coming to terms so although he told me I was on my own I was preparing myself for that. I didn't for one second prepare myself for having a miscarriage and how hard it would be. So in a way I feel stupid for wanting his support because I know he didn't care about the baby anyway but I'd just like some sort of sympathy from him!

The worst thing is, I can't avoid him. I work with him so have to see him a lot! I have been back at work this week and just seeing him makes me so angry. He just keeps talking to me as if nothing has happened but not asking how I am or anything. I hate seeing him walking around so happy cause I feel he's being so smug that in the end he got things his way! It just makes everything feel so unfair that people like him get what they want.

Since posting on here I have talked to him. I wanted to confront him about why he never texted me back when I was having the miscarriage. He first denied ignoring any of my texts but then basically told me that I had chosen to have this baby knowing he wasn't going to be involved so whatever happened from there onwards I had CHOSEN to deal with by myself. I told him that all I really needed from him was someone to talk to and he said that he will be there to listen to me but I won't necessarily get any sympathy out of him because he's not going to treat me any different than he'd treat anyone else in my situation. 

I know that I was never in a relationship with this guy and there were no feelings involved in what we had together but just simply from one human being to another you expect people to have a bit more emotion than that! I wouldn't treat a complete stranger in the way he is treating me never mind someone I knew in any capacity. 

It did feel good letting out some of my anger at him. It gives me hope that in time I'll get over how he has treated me. 



> When the doctor confirmed I had lost the baby (I found it so hard to see my empty womb after seeing that little heratbeat just 4 days earlier) he started to give me advice on when I could start trying again. I got so upset as that obviously isn't an option for me and it just compounded my sadness and loss.

I feel this way too! Although I hadn't planned on having a baby right now, and certainly not with him, I loved that baby and the thought of my life with him. I miss having that & him to look forward to and I have no idea when I will have that feeling again. It's more than likely going to be years from now!


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## pooh_bear

[/QUOTE]

I feel this way too! Although I hadn't planned on having a baby right now, and certainly not with him, I loved that baby and the thought of my life with him. I miss having that & him to look forward to and I have no idea when I will have that feeling again. It's more than likely going to be years from now![/QUOTE]

I know exactly what you mean and it is very daunting to not have any idea when you will be able to have a baby. I do wish I was with a good man and could have the family I dream of. I wasn't sure I could even have children so when I found out I was pregnant I was delighted and saw it as a blessing and a miracle.Like yourself I knew I'd be a single mother and had no problem with that but the pain of the miscarriage is horrific. I feel so sorry for you that you have to see this guy at work - he sounds very selfish and heartless in my opinion and as you said you couldn't treat a stranger in the cold way he has treated you. It isn't our faults but these guys neither wanted nor deserved to be fathers. I was just looking through photos of my ex and I (we were on holiday in Feb) and it feels SO strange that its all ended in such a cruel, painful way. Life is so strange and unpredictable. The human mind is very cruel and it is easy to think back to the good times but I am trying to stay strong and remind myself that a 'man' who can't support you when you are carrying their baby won;t ever support you in anyway and isn't deserving of your love. It is hard though. I am thinking of you and hope you are ok x


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## Andypanda6570

I am so deeply sorry nobody should have to go through this nobody :cry:
I lost Ava at 7 weeks ago at 18 weeks and funny I am the only one still mourrning. I feel so alone :cry::cry::cry::cry:


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## pooh_bear

Oh Andrea that is terrible. I think the experience of losing a baby is such a lonely one regardless of personal circumstances. We feel the pain, grief, loss and emptiness much more than anyone else because our babies were a part of us, growing inside us and that creates a bond that other a mother can feel. I am so sorry for your loss and hope that time will ease this pain. Thinking of you x


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## aviolet

estewart88 said:


> but just simply from one human being to another you expect people to have a bit more emotion than that! I wouldn't treat a complete stranger in the way he is treating me never mind someone I knew in any capacity.
> 
> It did feel good letting out some of my anger at him. It gives me hope that in time I'll get over how he has treated me.

Exactly!!!! like you say, "one human being to another". I am so sorry he said those things and feels so coldly towards the situation. :hugs: But I'm very glad you confronted him.


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## estewart88

Andypanda6570 said:


> I am so deeply sorry nobody should have to go through this nobody :cry:
> I lost Ava at 7 weeks ago at 18 weeks and funny I am the only one still mourrning. I feel so alone :cry::cry::cry::cry:

I'm sorry for your loss :cry: It's such a horrible feeling to feel that everyone else has moved on and forgotten while you still can't think of anything else but your baby :cry: :hugs:


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## biba88

I know this is an old post but i really do understand what you ladies have been through.
My story starts when i met a guy i though was great.we had so much in common and all that.the sad thing is i got pregnant the first time we had sex.when i found out all i could think is"what just happened?"i didnt want to tell him but kinda had to coz it would be unfair.i tried to call,text,inbox,fb him but for 2days it was like i was talking to myself.that when i thought he already got what he wanted(sex)and thats was that.but he called and told me he had lost him phone.so i told him and i could tell he was freaked out.i knew he had alot of things to think about so i tried to give him time to think about it.i didnt know what i wanted at that point.but by the end i knew i wanted my babies.he was supportive as he could be.i told him i gave him an out and that he can help when he was able to and that was that for me and him.and i was ok with that because i understood he couldnt help at that point and we were not in a relationship so i made plans to move on with my life and have this two bundles of joy.
On my drive home i started cramping like crazy and spotting so i called my doctore and hetold me to cme to the er.he couldnt find a heartbeat and told me they stopped growing at 6 weeks..and that i will miscarry..tears started rolling and all i could think of is to call him and let him know.he wouldnt pick up like always so i texted him that i needed him..and told him what happened but no reply .i was not shocked at this point i was used to reply.he texted me the next day asking if i was ok..:'(.i didnt tell any of my friends that i was pregnant so after the doc gave me the new i went home and locked myself in the hse.
The next day we talked and he said he would be around for me if i needed him.when he said that i told god thank you for listen to my prayers.(i will have help through all this)but to no shock he didnt keep his word.he was a no show.since i told my doc i would rather have a natural miscarriage i have been waiting for four days..cryin,havnt slept ,no eating,i havent seen anyone since monday and today is friday..i hope this pain will pass soon.i need to be me again.independent and strong .i dnt see why i need him but i do he was the father and i think he cares.i am not making excuses for him but i really believe he is a nice guy that doesnt have an idea how to handle everything inhis life.but when i pray from peace in my heart i pray for him too.i pray that his life goes wellin order for me to get through this pain i have to forgive him.but what i hate is i can never forget.he is the first man i had a baby with and he treated me like i was just another mistake in his life.:'(.i dont know if this pain goes away.
After all i have been through all i have learnt is..i am strong than i think and i dont think i want kids again if miscarriage is an option.at 23 i have learnt not to trust anyone but yourself.

My doc said it can take up to a week for me to miscarry.i really pray i am strong enough to get through it alone.


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## Krissy27

biba88 said:


> I know this is an old post but i really do understand what you ladies have been through.
> My story starts when i met a guy i though was great.we had so much in common and all that.the sad thing is i got pregnant the first time we had sex.when i found out all i could think is"what just happened?"i didnt want to tell him but kinda had to coz it would be unfair.i tried to call,text,inbox,fb him but for 2days it was like i was talking to myself.that when i thought he already got what he wanted(sex)and thats was that.but he called and told me he had lost him phone.so i told him and i could tell he was freaked out.i knew he had alot of things to think about so i tried to give him time to think about it.i didnt know what i wanted at that point.but by the end i knew i wanted my babies.he was supportive as he could be.i told him i gave him an out and that he can help when he was able to and that was that for me and him.and i was ok with that because i understood he couldnt help at that point and we were not in a relationship so i made plans to move on with my life and have this two bundles of joy.
> On my drive home i started cramping like crazy and spotting so i called my doctore and hetold me to cme to the er.he couldnt find a heartbeat and told me they stopped growing at 6 weeks..and that i will miscarry..tears started rolling and all i could think of is to call him and let him know.he wouldnt pick up like always so i texted him that i needed him..and told him what happened but no reply .i was not shocked at this point i was used to reply.he texted me the next day asking if i was ok..:'(.i didnt tell any of my friends that i was pregnant so after the doc gave me the new i went home and locked myself in the hse.
> The next day we talked and he said he would be around for me if i needed him.when he said that i told god thank you for listen to my prayers.(i will have help through all this)but to no shock he didnt keep his word.he was a no show.since i told my doc i would rather have a natural miscarriage i have been waiting for four days..cryin,havnt slept ,no eating,i havent seen anyone since monday and today is friday..i hope this pain will pass soon.i need to be me again.independent and strong .i dnt see why i need him but i do he was the father and i think he cares.i am not making excuses for him but i really believe he is a nice guy that doesnt have an idea how to handle everything inhis life.but when i pray from peace in my heart i pray for him too.i pray that his life goes wellin order for me to get through this pain i have to forgive him.but what i hate is i can never forget.he is the first man i had a baby with and he treated me like i was just another mistake in his life.:'(.i dont know if this pain goes away.
> After all i have been through all i have learnt is..i am strong than i think and i dont think i want kids again if miscarriage is an option.at 23 i have learnt not to trust anyone but yourself.
> 
> My doc said it can take up to a week for me to miscarry.i really pray i am strong enough to get through it alone.


I feel for you, I feel alone too. Having the father be non supportive is very hard. This is when you need them the most and they aren't there. My boyfriend recently told me that the miscarriage and hardship was a sign from god that we aren't ready and he started questioning our relationship. That really hurt because I have PCOS and I have dealt with infertility in the past with my ex-husband so when I did finally get pregnant with my boyfriend I told him it was a sign from God that it was meant to be but now that I've lost the baby he says it is a sign we are not. I told him if it was a sign; god would have never of let me get pregnant in the first place and my dr said this could make us stronger as a couple. Which it hasn't. 

I recently posted a forum about this and the advice I got from other women is to be patient and give him time. Also men and women grieve differently and sometimes they distant themselves and hold their feelings in. You are very strong to be able to pray for him. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and if you need someone to talk to let me know. Also try taking tylenol PM at night to help you sleep. It is more difficult to get through when you are unable to sleep, it adds to the intense feelings of grief. *hugs* know that you are not alone and we are here to support you! :hug:


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## ami1985

i went through this too..today i txted him and told him id lost it...no reply 

We dont need it we have us here to talk to...not as good as a face to face cuddle etc but we get more love and support here then im guessing most of our poor babies we lost "fathers" xxxx


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## amotherslove

this happened to me as well.. my babys father took a huge turn from "you have to let me into his/her life, it's my baby" (there were BIG reasons i didnt want him around) to completely disappearing when i decided i may allow him some access..

as far as i know he has no idea that our daughter died a month ago.. and it makes me so angry that he wouldnt have cared. 

however, it has helped me let go of him.. i was so in love.. but as time and experiences that change you, pull you away from an ex.. i had so much change in a matter of a month that he doesn't even know the person i am now.. he is nothing to me.. the pain he caused me by leaving is but a fraction of what i feel like without my lily.. i hope that your man either smartens up or that this experience truly shows you how UN-needed he really is. 

with friends like these men.. who needs enemies?


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## Dana_Scully

Dealing with MC with a parter isn't easy either... This morning my husband is forcing me to go out when I really just want to stay in and not talk to anyone. I know it's been 3 weeks, but I'm still feeling the same way. It's like he just wants to make another baby and forget about this little Bean... I think with or without a parter, MCs are always hard to deal with. I hope things go well for you xxx


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## biba88

Thank you krissy27.i am sorry for what you are going through.i am not in a relation with the father so if he is not talking to me or says the thing he say its less painful.i hope time will help your boyfriend will see what a blessing babies are and God doesnt take them away to teach use lessons or to prove a point.i pray that your boyfriend will see what a blessing children are and try again.

I know i thought i needed the father in my life till today out of church i met my ex boyfriend.i was with him for 3 and a half years.he asked to talk to me and i though i really should talk to him.he took me for coffee and i just broke down like a little baby and told him everything.he was always around when i needed him.he was speechless..but had tears in his eyes..like a human being he had emotions.he held me and told me i ahould have called him..i am still tearin up.he made me feel safe and cared for.he told me i am just a call away and all i need to do is let him know when i need him.i prayed and God gave me support.i still havent talked to any other friends but am glad me ex is around if i need him.which i think i will after last night.i did things am not proud of.i didnt know how to handle my pain and sleeplessness so i let my friends drag me to a spa after got drinking wine and got drunk and texted things i shouldnt have :(.but i woke up and felt 10 times worse than i did before.

I am starting to think i should just keep away from him for good.but i like him,i think its because i think i need him and this is so much to go through for me to just forget him.like i said before i will carry him with me ever time i think off children,or when i see people with babies..i dont know if it gets better but i hope it does.because i dont want to thinking off anyone who doesnt care about me.

I got a very nice offer to work for a company i have been dreaming to work for and i have to move from this state to a bigger one.i think the fresh start will help me get over all the things in my life that are going wrong.
And one last thing.we all make mistakes in life and we learn from them.meeting this guy just was not a mistake.i know this because the man i met the 1st time is what i will remember and cherish,the man who was a gentleman and paid for dinner thats who i liked,the man who texted and called was the man i gave my number to,the man i slept with is the man i was attracted to.thats who i will choose to remember because he is the one who i got pregnant with.if i think of him as a mistake i will be hurt and and never find a way to move foward.he was a part of my life no matter how short.so i choose to find a way to move on even with what i feel for him.

I will remember you ladies in my prayer and hope you find your peace like i am try to.it will be hard but its better to start than to sit and wait for peace to find us
Hugs too all off you and am happy i can vent on here .if anyone wants to talk am always here to listen and help if i can.


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