A bit apprehensive

[cdj1]

OK so my first birth wasn't exactly how I had imagined labour to be but then who knows what will happen...I gave birth in hospital because I just thought it was safer for my first baby. I didn't have a great deal of support from the midwives during the time between I arrived at 4cm and 9cm dilated..my first midwife just left me alone in the unit's big bath (I'll never forget what she said - "why don't you have a NICE bath" pffft it was the worst bath i have ever had!). The bathroom had no windows and was stuffy and horrible and smelt of chemicals. I managed to get through 4-9cm on gas and air and lots of yelling but once they took me out to examine me and we found I was 9cm, they suggested waiting until I could push...so I did as I was told for 2 hours but DS heart rate was showing decelerations after each contraction so they whisked me into theatre for an emergency spinal/episiotomy and ventouse delivery! But just before the spinal kicked in I actually felt what I know now to be REAL urges to push and they must have been real because after 2 pushes and 1 pull from the doctor with the ventouse equipment, DS was born!

So my point is, that I am now planning a home birth with a lovely doula as I believe that my anxiety levels may have contributed to the way I felt in labour with DS plus the fact I had no emotional support (DH was bless him, pretty useless) but I am still feeling those nerves as now this is my 2nd labour I guess I know how uncomfortable it can be and I suppose I am actually a little worried about having baby at home, even though I know it can be so much better...

Did anyone else feel this way with their 1st home delivery/2nd baby? And does anyone have any positive stories to share with me!!! I guess I just need a bit of moral support that I really am doing the right thing! I just dont know!

x

 

[cdj1]

Bump! There must be someone who can give me some advice please

 

[aliss]

Yes and no, I waffle at times, being only 13ish weeks it's easy to put the thought out of my mind but I'd be bricking it at 32 weeks!

I had a similar delivery to your 1st (except induction/dystocia instead of instrumental) and honestly, I keep focusing on the thought that being at HOME will relax me, being MOBILE will relax me, my doula is a doula and not some bitch L&D nurse who cares more about reading a fetal monitor than listening to me tell her what my body is going through (ARGH this still pisses me off 2 years later), and reading plenty of positive HB stories, especially from women with traumatic 1st hospital births.

Good luck!! We're in it together!!!

 

[madasa]

I picked a hospy birth first time and it was pants. It ended in a forceps delivery.

I had the same anxiety as you about my second birth. I had a wonderful home birth in water and I can't wait to do it again.

YOU CAN DO IT!

Being at home will make all the difference. You will be less anxious, which will make the whole thing less painful. You will be undisturbed. Support will be continuos and one to one. You will have any and all simple comfort measures you need - right down to the lighting, the scent, your own bed, music if you want it.

You know what to expect now, so you can actively plan coping strategies for each wave.

It sounds like ou are more informed now. You could not BE any more prepared!

You are going to rock the socks off this birth.

 

[cdj1]

Thanks for your support...this sounds really silly but a small part of me wants to be in a ward with other mums so we can swop stories etc...if I give birth at home I will be on my own with no other new mums to compare battle scars with etc lol and also no rest from my very active 18 month old son!!!
For some reason my mind has been very torn these last 2 days about how committed I am to this home birth!

 

[Kimboowee]

I had an awful time first time round - long difficult labour with a mw that looked like she would rather be sticking needles in her eyes than at work!

I gave birth in the hospital 2nd time round too, I didn't want a homebirth as my first son was quite sick when he was born so wanted to be close to medical assistance if baby needed it, but if not I wanted a quick exit.

My 2nd labour was an absolute breeze! I used basic hypnobirthing techniques, and used breathing techniques throughout. I had a fantastic mw would suggested I had a bath the clary sage and lavender, I lasted about 15 mins and got out as I was in absolute agony as baby was back to back. It was nice having someone open to my ideas! I got to 6cm with no pain relief but decided to have g&a as I knew she wouldn't be long - she was 30 mins! They were ready to discharge me after 3 hours but her temp dropped so it was 6 in the end. Have you heard of Daisy Birthing? I wish I had a local teacher when In was pregnant!

 

[loobylou29]

Sounds to me like your just having last minute nerves, dont forget if your panicky then you can always transfer to the hospital at ANY time This is my 1st home birth too after 3 horrible hospital births where I was in such a rush to get out afterwards I didnt even look twice at the other mums there much less stop to have a chat
Make a pro and con list maybe?
My pros would be: that my partner will be with me all the time before and after delivery, my kids will meet maisie straight away regardless of hospital visiting times, i will be able to get food and drink when i want not when midwives decide to ask, i will be in my own environment with all my own stuff, i will be in no rush to get baby dressed so max skin to skin contact, i will be able to rest immediately after the birth for as long as i want, we will have one to one contact with midwifes that arent running off every 2 mins etc.
I would write a con list but other than I would need to travel to the hospital if there was an emergency I cant think of any others lol x