I lost my angel on Sunday evening at 9:30. It was an awful experience but I am getting through it and am now able to come back and tell my story.
On Sunday morning I noticed that I had some blood in my CM. It was very faint and I tried not to worry, remembering that some spotting is a common occurance in many pregnancies. By 2:00 that afternoon I had bright red bleeding, but it wasn't heavy like a period so I prayed and hoped it would be okay. We had 13 family members over for dinner that evening (a pleasant distraction, despite talk of what colour we would choose for the nursery) and then when I left I went upstairs to check.
I found the embryo, fully intact and still in its sac. I was 6w3d and there was no mistaking what had happened. I lost my baby.
My husband was an incredible source of strength for me and continues to be. I have never felt so devastated or helpless. He held me as I sat on the closet floor and sobbed. He helped me make decisions like whether we should go to the hospital or not and did anything I asked. We were at the hospital until 2:00 a.m. after the miscarriage had been confirmed.
We both took Monday off of work and spent the day at home, grieving and just being there. He was back to work on Tuesday. I intended to do so as well but couldn't fall asleep that night - the silence was deafening and I could only think about what had happened and cry. So at 4:30 I called my boss and told him I needed one more day.
Last night my husband took me to see Madagascar 2 at the theatre, which was really funny and it felt good to laugh. I am back at school today (I am a high school teacher) and although the kids & staff keep asking where I was, it's good to be back. It has been a tough day and I have had to swallow more than a few tears, but staying home longer wouldn't have helped.
I will always miss my baby - it was my first pregnancy and I will treasure every moment of it. We will try again in 2-3 months.
On Sunday morning I noticed that I had some blood in my CM. It was very faint and I tried not to worry, remembering that some spotting is a common occurance in many pregnancies. By 2:00 that afternoon I had bright red bleeding, but it wasn't heavy like a period so I prayed and hoped it would be okay. We had 13 family members over for dinner that evening (a pleasant distraction, despite talk of what colour we would choose for the nursery) and then when I left I went upstairs to check.
I found the embryo, fully intact and still in its sac. I was 6w3d and there was no mistaking what had happened. I lost my baby.
My husband was an incredible source of strength for me and continues to be. I have never felt so devastated or helpless. He held me as I sat on the closet floor and sobbed. He helped me make decisions like whether we should go to the hospital or not and did anything I asked. We were at the hospital until 2:00 a.m. after the miscarriage had been confirmed.
We both took Monday off of work and spent the day at home, grieving and just being there. He was back to work on Tuesday. I intended to do so as well but couldn't fall asleep that night - the silence was deafening and I could only think about what had happened and cry. So at 4:30 I called my boss and told him I needed one more day.
Last night my husband took me to see Madagascar 2 at the theatre, which was really funny and it felt good to laugh. I am back at school today (I am a high school teacher) and although the kids & staff keep asking where I was, it's good to be back. It has been a tough day and I have had to swallow more than a few tears, but staying home longer wouldn't have helped.
I will always miss my baby - it was my first pregnancy and I will treasure every moment of it. We will try again in 2-3 months.
so sorry for your loss hun xx
