Am i odd that im finding it difficult seeing my pregnant friends???

chella

mummy of 3 & 1 angel x
Joined
Mar 5, 2009
Messages
1,002
Reaction score
0
I know this is an odd post to post but im just feeling very alone, as at the momenr i seem to find it hard seeing my pregnant friends and also even when out seeing pregnant ppl and newborns, i know its early days as i only had induced miscarriage last thursday but just wonder if ne one else felt or feels that way????
 
It's always hard bit I find it helps to see it as postive that there are so many healthy pregnancies going on and hopefullly one will be mine soon! One of my friends has just confided that she is due at the same time I would have been - now that's gonna be a hard one!!!! I'm surrounded by friends who are pg or have newborns, I figure I've got to grin and bear it and find some comfort in having cuddles with the LOs
 
I know how you feel. My sister is pregnant and I am feeling a bit detached tbh. It is not a personal thing but I cant wait to meet my little niece or nephew.

It will be our turn soon xxxx
 
:hugs:, I think it's completely normal. Fingers crossed it will be your turn very soon.

:hug:
Gemma x
 
Thanks guys for ur replies, i have a friend who i work with whos due end sept, and another friend due beginning oct then another friend end of oct i was mid oct due so their goin to be constant reminders but im easing alot and looking forward now to being a great aunt again for the 5th time in august so that should giv me focus , i would like to try again but just bit scared at mo, and very early days and i know that as much as around that time will hurt i will share the joys with my friends babies and the tears i shed will be in memory for my lil one and also a safe arrival of a new life for my friends
xxx
 
Its perfectly natural to feel that way, i remember feeling very judgemental, if i saw someone who was pregnant i would look for fault ie they were smoking/drinking/eating wrong etc etc and why was this horrible thing happening to me the person who did everything correct and not them!!!! Even confinded in my doctor that i was scared i would turn into some crazy woman who would end up stealing a baby.
It does get better with time.
As for feeling alone tell me about it i am 100 miles away from my family but my OH family live very close if i heard once how it wasnt meant to be i heard it 100 times really got on my nerves. Different generation deal with it different i guess
xx
 
Its perfectly natural to feel that way, i remember feeling very judgemental, if i saw someone who was pregnant i would look for fault ie they were smoking/drinking/eating wrong etc etc and why was this horrible thing happening to me the person who did everything correct and not them!!!! Even confinded in my doctor that i was scared i would turn into some crazy woman who would end up stealing a baby.
It does get better with time.
As for feeling alone tell me about it i am 100 miles away from my family but my OH family live very close if i heard once how it wasnt meant to be i heard it 100 times really got on my nerves. Different generation deal with it different i guess
xx


Thank u i think i needed to hear that, i have good days where it doesnt bother me then bad days where i cant even bear to look at a baby but yep all will get better in time and yes i heard that same sayin loads xxx sendin :hug: and thanks again xxxx
 
I know how you feel. :hugs: Immediately after my recent mc I felt completely detached...no feelings whatsoever when I saw anyone pregnant etc. But I think that was the only way I could cope. Now that the immediate trauma of losing my LO is subsiding, all the old feelings are coming back and I'm more jealous than ever. Yesterday I bumped into an old schoolfriend with her 3 week old baby. She's a lovely person and the baby was beautiful And I know she's had a difficult loss with her first pregnancy. I did and said all the right things about how beautiful her little girl was, etc etc...then went back to my car and cried. I felt guilty because I wanted to be happy for her, but couldn't. It hurt so much that I had empty arms and an empty belly, and I hated the fact that I couldn't feel genuine happiness for my schoolfriend.

I don't want to get all bitter and jealous, but I don't know how to stop it. I'm dreading the upcoming births in our circle of friends...I don't know how I will cope with having to go and visit, and buy baby presents and cards.

I just wonder if it'll ever be my turn.

I know how difficult it is. I guess it's just normal, but it's horrible for us to feel this way. :hug: :hug: :hug:
 
Yup I think its totally normal. I was sitting in EPAU yesterday for my "follow up" scan, and had a wave of bitterness and anger as a lovely lady i had been speaking to came floating out of the scan with a big grin and announced that everything was ok. I felt awful, the feeling of resentment just popped out of me, I didnt have any control. I wouldnt wish anything bad like MC on anyone, but just for a second my heart took over.

It will ease, I remember feeling the same after my 1st MC, and slowly it'll ease and just become sadness :(

*hugs*
xx
 
Thank u guys its good to know im not odd in thinking this way, Like u Clare the 2nd time i went for scan where they declared baby had now died etc i was waiting around for my bloods to be done then to be given the tablet and a young girl came out al happy and was chatin away to her grandparents how glad she is and how she cant wait and how the heartbeat was amazin and i just sat there and thought lucky u , why couldnt that be me in your plc, etc but deep down i know like u i would never wish bad on ne one just felt life was so unfair atthat point thou,

My work mate who im very close with is expecting at end of sept, and we would of been so close that ive found it hard to see her at mo, but i hope this wil pass as theres a few friends and my niece all round aug, sept and my due date in oct so its going to be tough but knowing i have ppl on this forum to chat too kinda makes it that lil bit easier in life xxx so thanks again everyone xxx
 
It is really hard going into the hospital as you cope with the bad news and everyone else around (or so it seems) has growing bumps and everything ok for them. I'm going to wedding next weekend with a girl that is pregnant and that should have been me... going to be really tough seeing her with her big bump but I think this is normal. I'll just have to glug the wine he he. Don't worry, we have all been there x
 
It is really hard going into the hospital as you cope with the bad news and everyone else around (or so it seems) has growing bumps and everything ok for them. I'm going to wedding next weekend with a girl that is pregnant and that should have been me... going to be really tough seeing her with her big bump but I think this is normal. I'll just have to glug the wine he he. Don't worry, we have all been there x


Yeah wine sounds very nice haha, but it is true u do have that constant reminder, thank u for replying means alot xxxsending loadsa :hug: xxx
 
Totally normal to feel that way...it is so hard! :hugs:


Thank u, i hope it does ease but one min im fine then i find myself thinkin bout wen i was meant to be due and how i should be happy right now but i guess i jus hav to wait my turn again lol xxxx
 
I get just the same sweety, please don't worry.
Im so sorry for your loss :hugs:
 
Totally normal to feel that way...it is so hard! :hugs:


Thank u, i hope it does ease but one min im fine then i find myself thinkin bout wen i was meant to be due and how i should be happy right now but i guess i jus hav to wait my turn again lol xxxx


Its hard thinking about your due date etc and then seeing pegnant people and newborns everywhere is hard! I find it hard being on this site some days and other days im fine!

Thinking of you! :hugs:
 
Totally normal to feel that way...it is so hard! :hugs:


Thank u, i hope it does ease but one min im fine then i find myself thinkin bout wen i was meant to be due and how i should be happy right now but i guess i jus hav to wait my turn again lol xxxx


Its hard thinking about your due date etc and then seeing pegnant people and newborns everywhere is hard! I find it hard being on this site some days and other days im fine!

Thinking of you! :hugs:

Hey ya

Today i woke up fine then i just got dwn , and started dreadin my due date and worrying how im goin to cope , just hope it wont be forever xxxx
 
Definitely normal for you to feel like this hun. I much feel the same way. I am always so happy for my friends but also a part of me aches at the same time. Its definitely hard when everyone around you is pregnant including total strangers when you are out and about. Hope you are feeling better soon..so sorry for your loss :hug:xx
 
I know exactly what you mean Chella. My best friend is pregnant she is 13 weeks. I was 9 weeks up until last Friday.
I am finding it very hard to even text her at the moment let alone see her. She wants to come and see me on Friday but i'm just not sure i can cope with her .
Ironically she went through the same thing last year so she is the 1 person i should really be talking to .
Anyway point i was making before i went off was you are completely normal to feel the way you do
 
It's not odd at all. I have actually lost one friend due to pregnancy. She m/c'd in Dec at 10 weeks and I m/c'd in Feb at 18. Two weeks to the day after I had lost my baby she tells me she's pregnant again. I haven't been able to speak to her since and I can't look at her or essentially have anything to do with her. If I run into her at work, it stays on a professional level and I don't dare ask her anything personal or reveal anything to her. It hurts too much. Maybe others can deal with it, but I can't.

What you're feeling is completely normal. I'm very sorry for your loss.
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Members online

Forum statistics

Threads
1,650,441
Messages
27,150,971
Members
255,858
Latest member
WishmeLuck86
Back
Top
monitoring_string = "c48fb0faa520c8dfff8c4deab485d3d2"