Anyone NOT got family support

[Eternal]

I wouldn’t say doing it on your own because I have a wonderfully supportive husband who works, but my family all live 10 hours away (600 miles) and Hubbys family don’t bother at all (unless its to put us down).

Anyone else?

 

[xerinx]

Yea i know that feeling hun. My family dont bother with me and ohs family live other end of country.

My oh is great tho

 

[Eternal]

Is Logan your first? how are you coping?

 

[xerinx]

Hes my 3rd but my older 2 live with their dad... not my choice but very long story.

Im coping ok tbh struggling at nights tho sometimes. It would be nice to have someone come in during the day and give me an hours peace ect but it doesnt happen. No one has been to see my lil man and that hurts me coz its him missing out not me!!

How you finding things?

 

[wallace272]

i wont have any family support ! hubby is RAF and so we live where we got to xx

 

[Kitten]

Both his and my parents live about a 5hour drive away. I find it hardest when he works away as I don't get a break.

 

[Eternal]

Hes my 3rd but my older 2 live with their dad... not my choice but very long story.

Im coping ok tbh struggling at nights tho sometimes. It would be nice to have someone come in during the day and give me an hours peace ect but it doesnt happen. No one has been to see my lil man and that hurts me coz its him missing out not me!!

How you finding things?

Sorry to hear about your older two, I bet you miss them tons.
Awww hun, I cope well with nights, I don’t breast feed so hubby can help out and does help out a lot with him, plus I am so lucky that he has started sleeping 6 – 8 hours a night so its much easier for me now.

Yeah I miss people during the day, my SIL lives across the street and we really don’t get along, but my MIL is there constantly, plus her hubby only works 2 days and 2 nights a week so 5 days of the week he is there and she still gets loads of support. We did start trying to invite our parents in law over but they say its too far or they have been over to SIL so many times that week already so no. We make effort to go there but SIL is always there telling me I am not doing things right :S

On top of that my baby is 9 weeks and SIL is 6 weeks pregnant ... oh course now everyone is expeted to look after SIL including me cos she is pregnant and feeling sick ... seriously, I lost 3 stone in pregnancy and no one bothered grrr... It annoys me they don’t bother with me but hurts because my son is missing out and they do for the others and not us.
Sorry for the rant!

 

[Eternal]

wallace272 - Sorry to hear that you will be all alone, I get more annoyed then anything else cos there is family across the street but they just want to make my life difficult ... but having a baby and looking after then all yourself is really gratifying. that buzz you get when you have done really well at work you can still get when you do well at home, and because there is no one else you know it was all you of course there arent many people around to celebrate you achievements but its still a nice feeling.


Kitten - My husband donest work away much so lucky there but i still find it hard when he is on call on on shift ... its such a long day when your home by yourself and you sometimes feel so boxed in as there is no break at all. Sam at the moment likes to be awake all day, he likes his playmat which gives me a bit of a break but the rest of the time he wants to be played with and entertained, its really tiring. lol.

 

[caz81]

yeah! my family are 3,000 miles away so apart from hubby very much on my own!!

 

[Kitten]

Yeah tell me about it! I've tried to get as much going on as possible, like swimming on Tuesday morning and we go to Rhyme Time with 2 mummy friends on a Friday and then coffee after but it would be SO nice to have someone just come round and play with him for an hour so I could have a shower or cook something nice for lunch, or finish a cup of tea, or grab a nap. Hubby is out the house for work from 6.30am - 4pm so it's not so bad but as soon as he gets in he tidies round, then we cook tea while the other one watches Theakston, then bath him and get him down for about 7pm and then we can't do much like shower etc because it might wake him up and then we go to bed at 9pm because we're so shattered. God knows how I'm going to find time to make myself presentable when I go back to work.

That's the other thing, my stepmum only works a few hours in the afternoon so if we lived nearby she could have Theakston while I was at work but instead we're forking out £80 a week for a childminder. It's the same with going out on an evening etc. I wouldn't feel comfortable getting a babysitter for Theakston at his age so we never get chance to do anything without him. Not that that's easy with him still being breastfed but it'd be nice to just give him to someone for a couple of hours so we could go for a meal together without one of us having to entertain him while the other eats!

 

[chuck]

Me and hubby live equidistantly 250 miles from both of our families...its a blessing and a curse.

On one hand they arent around to annoy/interfere but then they arent around to help and give us a break.

We went back to Wales to see Hubbys folks the other week and when we got back it hit home just how good it was to be able to have Grandma take the lo even for a couple hours so we could go out and spend some time just the 2 of us.

We're coping really well at the moment at least I think we are lol, but I go back to work in a few weeks and then things will be difficult, I hate the idea of going back to work so soon, babba is only 7 weeks and I go back in 6 weeks...but I cant afford to stay off any longer I have to go back to full time work to make rent and pay my debts let alone having to find the nursery fees!

 

[caz81]

Kitten- your in Crawley, my family live near there!! xx

 

[Eternal]

awww ... its so nice hearing other people in the same boat. i wish there were someone around to have him even just for an hour now and then, like today, as i have to pick up a prescription for sam, and you can never park anywhere near the pharmacy and its really icy so i hate having to take him and carry him in his car seat and try not to slip, seems pointless and even more complicated to use his pram just to go into the pharmacy so would be lovely for someone to be around to just have him then.

plus when he has injections i feel like it would be nice for someone else to be there to support me lol.

 

[xerinx]

Hes my 3rd but my older 2 live with their dad... not my choice but very long story.

Im coping ok tbh struggling at nights tho sometimes. It would be nice to have someone come in during the day and give me an hours peace ect but it doesnt happen. No one has been to see my lil man and that hurts me coz its him missing out not me!!

How you finding things?

Sorry to hear about your older two, I bet you miss them tons.
Awww hun, I cope well with nights, I don’t breast feed so hubby can help out and does help out a lot with him, plus I am so lucky that he has started sleeping 6 – 8 hours a night so its much easier for me now.

Yeah I miss people during the day, my SIL lives across the street and we really don’t get along, but my MIL is there constantly, plus her hubby only works 2 days and 2 nights a week so 5 days of the week he is there and she still gets loads of support. We did start trying to invite our parents in law over but they say its too far or they have been over to SIL so many times that week already so no. We make effort to go there but SIL is always there telling me I am not doing things right :S

On top of that my baby is 9 weeks and SIL is 6 weeks pregnant ... oh course now everyone is expeted to look after SIL including me cos she is pregnant and feeling sick ... seriously, I lost 3 stone in pregnancy and no one bothered grrr... It annoys me they don’t bother with me but hurts because my son is missing out and they do for the others and not us.
Sorry for the rant!

Dont worry about the rant we all need to sometimes!!

I ff so oh does help alot but my lo seems to think night means playtime lol. Hes up most of the night... doesnt cry just is wide awake. Me and oh take it in shifts lol. I go bed at 11/12 and am up at 4 and then he goes bed till 8/9. Not ideal but it means we get a few hours of solid sleep

My mum lives in brighton and has decided shes coming up next month to see me for 4 days but shes bringing her new fella who i dont really get on with. My mum hasnt been to see me in nearly 3 years so its gonna be strange having her in my house.

My dad doesnt really bother with me. He lives in devon and we text 3/4 times a year!!

My ohs dad is in devon and doesnt have much money so cant really get up here. We seem to be the parent there and lend him money ect. He lovely and has helped us out but sometimes it would be nice for him to ring us ect instead of us doing the running.

Thats pretty much all our family! Just had hv out and when she asked about our support system we explained we dont have any and she proper looked down her nose at us. Told me i have pnd because last 2 nights ive been up and cried!! I tried explaining that its not pnd its sleep deprevation!!! But shes making me go docs. Grrrrr i hate people that make me do things

Theres my mini rant lol. x x

 

[Kitten]

Kitten- your in Crawley, my family live near there!! xx

Small world! Where are you? We could swap families lmao.

 

[caz81]

Kitten- your in Crawley, my family live near there!! xx

Small world! Where are you? We could swap families lmao.

Im in Oman at the moment, guessing your family arnt here though lol x

 

[Kitten]

Hehehe certainly not!

 

[Eternal]

Hes my 3rd but my older 2 live with their dad... not my choice but very long story.

Im coping ok tbh struggling at nights tho sometimes. It would be nice to have someone come in during the day and give me an hours peace ect but it doesnt happen. No one has been to see my lil man and that hurts me coz its him missing out not me!!

How you finding things?

Sorry to hear about your older two, I bet you miss them tons.
Awww hun, I cope well with nights, I don’t breast feed so hubby can help out and does help out a lot with him, plus I am so lucky that he has started sleeping 6 – 8 hours a night so its much easier for me now.

Yeah I miss people during the day, my SIL lives across the street and we really don’t get along, but my MIL is there constantly, plus her hubby only works 2 days and 2 nights a week so 5 days of the week he is there and she still gets loads of support. We did start trying to invite our parents in law over but they say its too far or they have been over to SIL so many times that week already so no. We make effort to go there but SIL is always there telling me I am not doing things right :S

On top of that my baby is 9 weeks and SIL is 6 weeks pregnant ... oh course now everyone is expeted to look after SIL including me cos she is pregnant and feeling sick ... seriously, I lost 3 stone in pregnancy and no one bothered grrr... It annoys me they don’t bother with me but hurts because my son is missing out and they do for the others and not us.
Sorry for the rant!

Dont worry about the rant we all need to sometimes!!

I ff so oh does help alot but my lo seems to think night means playtime lol. Hes up most of the night... doesnt cry just is wide awake. Me and oh take it in shifts lol. I go bed at 11/12 and am up at 4 and then he goes bed till 8/9. Not ideal but it means we get a few hours of solid sleep

My mum lives in brighton and has decided shes coming up next month to see me for 4 days but shes bringing her new fella who i dont really get on with. My mum hasnt been to see me in nearly 3 years so its gonna be strange having her in my house.

My dad doesnt really bother with me. He lives in devon and we text 3/4 times a year!!

My ohs dad is in devon and doesnt have much money so cant really get up here. We seem to be the parent there and lend him money ect. He lovely and has helped us out but sometimes it would be nice for him to ring us ect instead of us doing the running.

Thats pretty much all our family! Just had hv out and when she asked about our support system we explained we dont have any and she proper looked down her nose at us. Told me i have pnd because last 2 nights ive been up and cried!! I tried explaining that its not pnd its sleep deprevation!!! But shes making me go docs. Grrrrr i hate people that make me do things

Theres my mini rant lol. x x

lol, some of that sounds familiar, when we first married hubbys parents couldnt do anything without him, seriously they would call and ask him the most simple things, plus they expected him to do everything for them and made a huge fuss when he didnt just drop everything and come running.

 

[bky]

Other than OH...both our families are over 6k miles/11k Km away. Not sure if it will be a challenge or not as even when we lived closer the ones we'd want watching the baby were not close (distance) at all.

 

[xerinx]

Hes my 3rd but my older 2 live with their dad... not my choice but very long story.

Im coping ok tbh struggling at nights tho sometimes. It would be nice to have someone come in during the day and give me an hours peace ect but it doesnt happen. No one has been to see my lil man and that hurts me coz its him missing out not me!!

How you finding things?

Sorry to hear about your older two, I bet you miss them tons.
Awww hun, I cope well with nights, I don’t breast feed so hubby can help out and does help out a lot with him, plus I am so lucky that he has started sleeping 6 – 8 hours a night so its much easier for me now.

Yeah I miss people during the day, my SIL lives across the street and we really don’t get along, but my MIL is there constantly, plus her hubby only works 2 days and 2 nights a week so 5 days of the week he is there and she still gets loads of support. We did start trying to invite our parents in law over but they say its too far or they have been over to SIL so many times that week already so no. We make effort to go there but SIL is always there telling me I am not doing things right :S

On top of that my baby is 9 weeks and SIL is 6 weeks pregnant ... oh course now everyone is expeted to look after SIL including me cos she is pregnant and feeling sick ... seriously, I lost 3 stone in pregnancy and no one bothered grrr... It annoys me they don’t bother with me but hurts because my son is missing out and they do for the others and not us.
Sorry for the rant!

Dont worry about the rant we all need to sometimes!!

I ff so oh does help alot but my lo seems to think night means playtime lol. Hes up most of the night... doesnt cry just is wide awake. Me and oh take it in shifts lol. I go bed at 11/12 and am up at 4 and then he goes bed till 8/9. Not ideal but it means we get a few hours of solid sleep

My mum lives in brighton and has decided shes coming up next month to see me for 4 days but shes bringing her new fella who i dont really get on with. My mum hasnt been to see me in nearly 3 years so its gonna be strange having her in my house.

My dad doesnt really bother with me. He lives in devon and we text 3/4 times a year!!

My ohs dad is in devon and doesnt have much money so cant really get up here. We seem to be the parent there and lend him money ect. He lovely and has helped us out but sometimes it would be nice for him to ring us ect instead of us doing the running.

Thats pretty much all our family! Just had hv out and when she asked about our support system we explained we dont have any and she proper looked down her nose at us. Told me i have pnd because last 2 nights ive been up and cried!! I tried explaining that its not pnd its sleep deprevation!!! But shes making me go docs. Grrrrr i hate people that make me do things

Theres my mini rant lol. x x

lol, some of that sounds familiar, when we first married hubbys parents couldnt do anything without him, seriously they would call and ask him the most simple things, plus they expected him to do everything for them and made a huge fuss when he didnt just drop everything and come running.

Sometimes you think the kids are the parents!! I sooo hope i dont end up like that!