Arrival of my nameless baby..my not so nice experience of ventouse and episiotomy

[nicole_]

i often read birth storys and at the end they say they would do it all again tomorow. i love my baby so much but i honestly dont think i could. the idea of getting pregnant again and giving birth scares the hell out of me
i dont think my experience was even as bad as some, but it was traumatic for me.
sorry its long i didnt realise it would be lol


anyways,
LO was due on thursday 21st april, for weeks i'd been positive i was going to go way over as baby had been very high and free the whole time and i had had absolutely no signs or indications of a baby coming!
my due date came and i thought i might try move around more to get baby moving down to atleast try and help my cervix get ready
went for two long walks on friday and bounced on my ball for 5 hours lol went to bed with no signs feeling like he was never going to come

woke up at 3:45am on the saturday 23rd april feeling wet and with back and leg pain. i wasnt sure if they were contractions or not as it just felt like insane cramp down the side of my thighs, none in my tummy at all!
couldnt go back to sleep so timed them and they were 5 mins apart lasting around 30-40 seconds. rang labour ward as baby wasnt moving at all and i thought my waters were possibly leaking, my pad was tinged with blood but it wasnt mucusy like a show or plug so thought it might be waters.
at 2pm the pains were getting a lot lot stronger, and the hospital wanted to check babys movements but told me id probably go home as sounded like early early labour.
went in at 4pm and got hooked up to the monitor and checked. was found to be 6cm already and told i definately wouldnt be going home was so happy to hear i was so far as i was in agony down my legs.
totally lost track of time after this.
started on the gas and air which was really helpful but after a few hours it wasnt doing anything and i BEGGED for an epidural. she said she'd check my progress and i was 8cm and it may be too late for an epidural i literally begged and begged for it lol and i got it luckily
best thing in the world, felt amazing i actually thought my contractions had stopped lol
however this started to wear off and baby started to get distressed, checked and was 10cm and told to push.
the epidural had pretty much gone now (little did i know, no-one had noticed the drip had fallen out and was leaking down my back so i wasnt getting any pain relief! )
baby was distressed now so they said they were going to have to get him out. the episiotomy and ventouse was the worse pain i've experienced. i felt the cut, i felt the injections, i felt the cup going in. i was crying my eyes out and my OH was getting really stressed out and panicky, all i could do was hold him as he hugged me
the pain only got worse as they pulled baby out, OH was looking pretty distressed himself and he couldnt bare to look anymore, as he said it was horrible how she was just pulling and pulling on the baby, he expected they'd help but not pull to the extent they did. the pain of babys head hanging out and his body still inside me was insane. i had no contraction, was tired, and didnt feel the need to push so he stayed half out for quite a bit. LO was born at 11:38 on the 23 April weighing 8lbs 5 ozs and im totally in love with him

afterwards and recovery,
i had 3 layers of stitches and needed the gas and air for this which hurt and i needed more injections to numb it, they hurt too.
i was moved up to the maternity ward after and the nurse wanted me to get up and go to the toilet, i didnt feel right when i got up, and after making it to the toilet i collapsed and luckily two nurses caught me,
to cut a long story short my iron levels had dropped dramatically post-birth despite no irregular blood-loss and i was not allowed out of bed for two days and had two blood transfusions. on top of the pain of the stitches and feeling so weak from the iron count. in total i had to stay in hospital two days and two nights. im still very sore and taking a lot of different antibiotics etc

this will definately stay with me and i cant see me wanting to get pregnant again, but i love my LO and am glad i've had the support of my OH to do everything as i can barely walk

 

[CeriB]

Congrats! Sorry you had a tough time.

 

[Floralaura]

Congratulations on the birth of your little Boy and sorry you had a bad time.
I had a bad time with my Baby too, I requested a debrief with a MW a few months later to go through what happened and why and it really did help. Whereas 15mth ago I swore I wouldn't do it again I am now going to TTC again in Sept..
Talk to your MW about how you feel and get some support as things are hard with a new Baby alone, never mind when you have a bad labour to deal with too..xx

 

[annaandoli]

Congratulations!!! oooh sounds painful. I too had a episiotomy and ventouse and am with you there on it being painful!! The memories of how much it hurt wear off quicker than you think. Enjoy your bundle of joy xxx

 

[JJay]

Sorry you had such a tough time but he looks worth it, soooo cute. Congratulations x

 

[emmi26]

aw so sorry hun. my baby was 11lb 5oz so you can imagine he wasnt the easiest baby to get out but luckily i avoided the ventouse and forceps reading yr story im bloody glad !
yr baby is gourgeous i hope you feel better soon and i hope you update when lo has a name !! x x

 

[estar]

Glad your little guy is here, sorry for such a difficult birth. Congratulations!!!

 

[AP]

well done and congratulations, i too had an epi and ventouse and i remember just wanting to cry, thats not like me but it was a lot to take! And although i gave birth on practically nothing, i needed gas and air for the stitches. Think its all normal hunny

 

[sarah0108]

and congratulations also xxx

 

[londonangel]

Oh my goodness. I'm sorry you had such an awful time. Very glad your little one is safely here though - he's very cute!

 

[tas1]

Congrats!!!!!!! Glad your little man has made his arrival...a dramatic one but he is here and you are both doing well!

We should make another group to stay in contact with all the 21st april'ers!!!

xx

 

[mamamay]

Oh Hun, your littleman is gorgeous. I am so sorry about the tough time you had - you are very brave xx

 

[Lui246]

Congratulations, sorry you had a tough time though, i also had an episiotomy because of forceps delivery and i thought i would never get over it but once the stitches healed i felt fine and actually wanted to try for another baby, (luckily OH talked me out of it as its too soon,lol). Hope you have a speedy recovery and feel better about your birth experience soon. Enjoy your little one.xx

 

[ClairHawkins]

So sorry you had such a tough time as mad as it sounds the memory will fade a little eventually, Your baby boy is beautifull so Congratulations and Good luck with healing x

 

[xxyjadexx]

Congratulations, sorry to hear it was so painfull! X

 

[mrsdavisthe1]

congrats sweetheart beautiful baby boy whats his name

 

[xcharx]

Congratulations! Sorry you had it soo rough x

 

[PeanutBean]

He's beautiful Nicole, congratulations! I'm so sorry you had such a difficult time. I also had a ventouse delivery with my first and a failed epi, though in my case it numbed me from pelvic floor down so I felt all the contractions (which were augmented after 30 hours of non-progression) but was paralyser and couldn't push but I didn't feel the ventouse or epis. It's very hate having a difficult birth and I strongly recommend having a debrief with the supervisor of midwives at your hospital. I did only a month ago and wish I'd known much earlier as I was very depressed about it for a good two years. But I've just had my second and birth was a totally different experience - at home with no intervention, no pain relief. Have faith that things will feel different in future but take the time to mourn and process this experience and enjoy your beautiful bundle!