Baby blues or more?

[GemGiraffe]

My baby girl is 11 days old and my emotions are all over the place. I range from feeling great, able to cope and happy to feeling sick to my stomach, wondering what the hell I've let myself in for and wanting to run away from the situation. I just don't know how to make things better.

I'm scared of being left on my own in case I don't cope. I'm scared I don't have that bond with my little girl yet. I'm upset that my OH had to go back to work early and I feel alone and thrown in the deep end.

Is this normal baby blues or should I worry that it's more? I have a history of depression and have suffered twice.

I've spoken to my sister who is a mum and she's arranged for meet with her friend tomorrow who suffered bad baby blues after her LO was born. I'm talking about it to my OH. What else can I do? I'm desperate to stop feeling like this.

 

[GemGiraffe]

Bump?

 

[WishfulX1]

Hi hun, didn't want to read and run but I'm afraid I can't offer much advice except that I remember with my first baby I felt exactly the same in the second week after I had him. My pregnancy was very much planned and I was so excited to have him but when it actually happened I felt so shocked at how much my life had changed! Complete 180! I panicked about simple things like what do I do if I'm alone and need the toilet and he's crying or how do I shower, I cried that I couldn't go to asda at midnight if I needed bread or milk etc! Very simple things panicked me!
All that eventually went away and soon it felt like he had always been part of my life and I couldn't imagine life before him!!
I had my baby girl 13days ago at 33weeks and although that has been stressful and I've cried loads over that! It's been extremely different than it was with my son as my life has already changed for one baby so my daughter should just slot right in

I hope u feel better soon and maybe you should speak with your doctor/midwife about it xx

 

[Buttercup84]

It's still really early days hon and totally normal to feel the way you do, could well be baby blues but at your 6 week check be sure to let the doctor know how you're feeling especially if the bad is outweighing the good as they can help you/refer you to others that can. DD's first few weeks were a bit of a blur for me and I found it difficult to cope a lot of the the time but it did get easier and now she's 8 months old and i'll be returning to work shortly, wondering where the time has gone, but the early days did feel very long and I really sympathise with you. Becoming a mum is a huge deal and it takes time to adjust so go easy on yourself. I have/had PND and bonding with my DD was gradual rather than immediate which I initially felt really guilty about but since talking to other mums i've found out that it's more common than I thought. Sending you hugs

 

[GemGiraffe]

Thank you both for sharing how you both felt. I do feel in total shock about how much my life has changed and I wonder when I will get to the stage when I enjoy this. This baby was very much planned which only makes me feel worse about the way I'm feeling now.

My OH has just gone off to work and I have that same sick feeling. Not that I won't cope today but more about why I'm not enjoying being a mum at the moment. I feel I'm constantly beating myself up about not feeling the way I think I should be feeling. My appetite is suffering as well and I barely ate a thing yesterday.

Today, I have two sets of visitors and it's my plan to surround myself with people and things to do this week to stop myself dwelling on negatives. LO is asleep now so I'm grabbing a coffee and I'm going to attempt getting a bath before she wakes up.

I'll definitely mention how I feel to the health visitor as having been depressed before I know it's worse not to admit the way you are feeling x

 

[pixiemum]

I sympathise with you Gem, i'm feeling exactly the same. My baby was planned (i initially didn't want anymore after my first son but i met my husband and he wanted kids so i came round to the idea that i'd like another one too). I had post natal depression after my first son, i kind of expected to get it again but i also thought maybe i'd not because i would know what was coming and what to expect, but unfortunately i got the baby blues, and i'm worried it is turning into post natal depression again. I feel down every day, wondering what i've done, feeling trapped, alone, desperate, crying all the time. I feel guilty but i also feel i just wish it was just me and my husband again as i miss him and the freedom (sounds selfish i know) I love my little boy so these feelings make me feel ashamed. I can only hope these feelings go away so i can enjoy my little boy more and stop making my husband worry.
I hope you get some help to feel better, if you wanna talk feel free to message me xx

 

[Arisa]

aww hun, at 11 days post partum i was a complete mess and worried i would not cope, i also thought people wanted to take my baby from me. the blues got really bad in the late afternoon for me so i was on medication as well as getting therapy weekly and it took me a good month to get over the roller coaster of emotions but rest assured it will pass

 

[GemGiraffe]

Aww pixiemum hang in there. I'm feeling a bit better. I'm still having my moments but taking control, getting out of the house and starting to get into a slim shape of a routine (as much as you can with just a 2 week old) is starting to help. Happy for you to message to chat. Talking has really helped me xx