Broken up, but neither of us will leave, arrghh!

[minties]

I don't know what to do. I've split with the father of my...our...kids, but we are both refusing to leave because we love the kids so much and can't stand to be away from them.



He wants to take our toddler and me have the baby, no fucking way! But I can't take the kids from him either.

It's a nightmare walking around not talking to eachother, I'm starting to feel like I'm going crazy.

I moved to this town for him, now he says he only wanted me to come so I'd bring Thomas. I feel like a stranger in my own home. All I do is cry all day. He's just gone out with Thomas to visit his mum, I'm paranoid they wont come back and feel like I should be calling the cops or something. I'm losing it!

 

[Dezireey]

oh hun what a terrible situation, I feel for you. I think in this instance you need some outside assistance / intervention. You both need to speak to someone who can mediate and help you both come to an amicable decision.

If there is no moving forward and neither of you will leave or split parenting then you may have to consider living together until the kids get older. I know its not nice to
say and there are some great Dads out there but children this age need to stay with their mum. He may have to put up with moving out and seeing them less. A baby and a toddler should stay with mummy, that is my opinion.

 

[newmummytobe]

Hi, I am in the same position - I applied for a house to rent but i didn't get it so currently looking for something else. Until then I have to stay in his house which is horrendous. I totally understand feeling like a stranger in your own house and feeling like u r going crazy. My ex is very controlling and plays mind games and is just making everything really hard. Last week I came home from work and he had changed the locks and wouldn't give me a key! All I can say is to keep yr chin up for your beautiful children and I'm sure you will work a way out. Sorry I have no better advice but just wanted you to know you are not on your own xxxxxxx

 

[Shezza84uk]

I know you say you don't want to take the kids from him but the living situation is not healthy either. You need to find a place of your own for yourself and your children and have a written visitation agreement and child maintenance agreement give him a copy and you keep one so he is assured he has access to the kids providing he gives you sufficient notice!

I remember from 3rd tri he was cheating with someone or something along that line no court in this planet would separate siblings it would traumatise your son so his idea is void. Make the move and he will just have to deal with his new fatherly responsibility as it stand! XX