c-section vs vaginal birth- need some guidance i guess

[Lexi mummy]

hi ladies

i only have just over 8 weeks until my little girl will be born (fingers crossed if my placenta continues to work and nothing else happens) i have been booked in for induction on the 23rd april and its great to have a date to work towards.

before i actually fell pregnant again i was adament i wanted a c section this time so it was all planned and i knew the baby would be here by a set time and date. then when i actually fell pregnant the thought of being cut open whilst awake made me feel so scared i said no natural birth again.

my labour with lexi was perfect in medical terms, i couldnt of asked for a better labour. i was in slow labour for 2 days but when i had the tablets inserted into my cervix it really boosted the labour and lexi was born 4 hours later. like i say in medical terms it couldnt of gone better.

i am getting closer and closer and i am just feeling so scared that this baby will be born not breathing but from the actual labour ei; something has gone wrong, or cord wrapped around her neck. i just cant shake the feeling that i am kind of pushing my luck in some ways.

its not about me going through the pain of labour i can do it, i did it before with a horrible midwife who refused to give me proper pain releif and treated me like i was having a heavy period but its my baby i am scared about. at least with a c section she would be born at a set time on a set date, i can deal with the pain of healing afterwards if it means she is born alive and well.

i just dont know what to do and i dont want to regret my decision by making the wrong one.

with a natural labour it would be lovely back up on my feet again a few hours after giving birth, can start exercising right away and look after the dogs on my own too. c section i will need a lot of help for a few weeks and wont be able to do much exercise but baby will not have to go through the stress of labour. i feel scared about the cord as my brother had it wrapped around his neck and had to be brought back so to speak. also when im having the scans i can see this baby has lots of cord and in the 4d scan it was right up by her face. i know too many people who have lost children through cord accidents.

im just so scared i dont know what to do and i am worried i will just panic all the way through the labour but then the thought of a c section scares the hell out of me too

 

[sukisam]

Oh luv how you're feeling is perfectly normal. My first baby Emily was stillborn at 24 weeks with a vaginal delivery, my 2nd was born at 35 weeks (she's 10) with an emergency section because she got stuck and my 3rd was a vaginal delivery (he's 7). There's no right or wrong answer and we realised after my 2nd baby that all my problems were down to my uterus being heart shaped so that's why all the prem babies (and Millie getting stuck during delivery).

I would say with support a vaginal delvery is best for Mum and baby, certainly from a recovery point of view it's better you can hold your baby etc.
Why don't you speak to your midwife and talk things through, the fear you have is normal after loosing a baby. Talk about your fears regarning the cord etc.

I think whatever you decide will be right for you but I must admit I really wanted a normal delivery with Josh because I hated not being able to hold Millie after the c-section and I wanted to be in charge of her care and I hated needing help.

Good luck with making your decision make sure you have lots of support
xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Drazic<3]

Oh darling,

This must be such a hard decision for you to make. Honestly, the best advice I can give is to sit down with your midwife and tell her your fears and talk it through. There is no 'wrong' answer but you have to do what feels right to you. Sending love and wishing you a perfect experience, whatever you choose

 

[lisa_33]

hey hunny,
i agree that you should talk it over with your midwife and consultant. i know vaginal birth is the best way to go but i completley understand why you would want a section. i will be having one because i had an emergancy one with maisie, and as much as it scares me i think well at least the baby will be out quickly. to be honest even if they said i could deliver naturally next time, i would refuse i just want my baby out as quickly as possible, just incase something goes wrong.
the recovery time doesnt worry me to much, its more the time spent in hospital afterwards. good luck in making your decision.
xxxx

 

[Mummy2Asher]

ive thought about this as i had a very traumatic birth with my son and on top i was treated horribly, and fortunately ive seen hundreds of c sections and have seen alot of pros and cons to it. a section is so relaxed, no screaming and pain etc and the baby is out quickly but then healing is very painful and u do need help with the baby. but things can also go wrong with sections, very rarely though.
my choice is to go for a vaginal birth in a hospital becuase i want to be able to look after the baby myself and will sturggle with no driving etc and i already have a 3yr old i need to look after. but its everyone own personal choice and i would speak to your midwife about your worries and options.
i know i am requesting a look around the hospital where i will be delivering, i know there is a special care there and theatres ready so i will feel 'safe' so to say. xxx

 

[angelstardust]

I don't belong on this forum but I had an elective with my DD after an em c section with DS2 when I had an abruption.

The reasons for choosing an elective are your reasons, but as for healing time afterwards, I was driving after 2 weeks. I have 2 boys (DS2 is disabled too so I had to lift a 4 year old at times) and healing afterwards was the main reason I was so against a c section, but it ended up being the safest option for us.

C section was at 9am, 11pm I was out of bed and had a shower, 8am the next morning I was up and dressed ready for my breakfast. Later that day DD was taken to SCBU and so I had to spend a week walking up and down a very long set of corridors several times a day. It was hard work, but I managed.

2 weeks after she was born I was driving and completely pain free. Some discomfort at night, but it was discomfort not pain and the pain killers (volterol) took care of it.

Do take the pain releif you are offered even if you feel fine because if you miss one then it wears off and your not so fine. Plan for having a c section, will your partner be at home for a few weeks afterwards, can someone help you with things like hoovering? Online shopping is a blessed thing. If your plates are in a low cupboard, move them up. Get your partner to leave out clothes at night for your other child so your not bending down raking through drawers. Little things like that help you get through it.

Whatever you decide, make the decision for what you feel is best for you and your baby, no matter what there will be a way to cope afterwards if you make some plans now.

 

[Coffee]

Awww hun . It must be so confusing for you. I can completely see where you are coming from.
The only thing i would disagree with is where you say the baby won't have to go through the stress of labour. A natural birth is by far less stressful for baby from what i have been told. When you have a c-section it is a big shock for baby to be suddenly thrust into the outside world like that. They told me when i had my section that about 50% of all babies born by c-section come out not breathing from the shock and have to be resuscitated slightly. As you know, my daughter came out not breathing and unfortunately after half an hour of trying to resuscitate her, they decided to stop.
Obviously there is more to it than this, and i think you know the Dr made a massive mistake during the section and fractured her skull pulling her out. BUT, this is of course very rare, i've never heard of it happening to anyone else, so i don't imagine for one minute this would be the case with you. I also keep thinking, had something gone wrong during a natural birth (cord accident or whatever) i can imagine i would definitely have a c-section the next time and noone would ever put me off! I guess i have a slightly biased view against c-section after what happened to me. That said, i will have to have another c-section with my next baby due to the unusual cuts they made on my womb last time, which make a vaginal birth dangerous for me and baby. As you can imagine, i am absolutely dreading it!
I agree with what the others have said - talk it over with your midwife and consultant, make sure you know the pros and cons for each for your particular situation and then you can make the best decision possible.

 

[im_mi]

I would always, always recommend a natural vaginal delivery over a caesar any day, its less stress on the body for mum and baby and as you have already said the recovery time is so short. Cord accidents are relatively rare, although i completely understand your worries

 

[Laura2919]

I have never been in your position. Losing a child must be such a hard thing to go through.
I have never had a natural birth but my C Section was not as bad as people make out. I was walking about after a day and I was home after 5. I was only kept in that long because I was on medication for an infection I caught whilst in labour.

My sister also had a section and was out in 3 days.

I only had painkillers to deal with the pain.

 

[Jox]

I know exactly what you mean. My birth with Kasper was amazing...perfect really. to me even the pain wasnt too bad but Im also worrying already about something going wrong during the labour.... i suppose its natural after what we have been thru. I agree with others that C-section is also very stressful for baby. I know it doesnt help but i think the chances of something going wrong during birth is very rare...(i know what happened to our angels is aswell) but we have to try and think positively and hope lightening doesnt strike twice...i hope you know what i mean

I really do think you need to do what you are most comfortable with, i know that doesnt help.

xxx

 

[Lexi mummy]

thanks ladies xx

i have decided im going to give birth. i didnt have a c section last time and my baby didnt pass away during labour so i really have no reason other than fear to have a c section. i know too much that can go wrong thats the problem really. i guess i just need to try it natural again and if i feel in my heart that something is wrong during labour i need to speak up. fingers crossed this litle one comes home thats for sure but for now i am going to stick to what i have done before xxx

 

[babytots]

Hi sweetie although I lost Jessica earlier then you did with Lexi it doesn't stop me having the same worries you do. If I was brave enough I would ask for a c-section but the thought of being awake while they cut me open terrifies me and so I know I could never do it but then I worry baby will have its cord around its neck or get stuck and doesnt get enough oxygen etc.

I would definitely talk it over with your midwife. I am going to ask if it would be possible to scan baby once I am in labour to check the position of the cord. That will then help me relax and I want to be monitored during the early stages and then hopefully have another waterbirth as I am also petrified of giving birth on dry land so to speak (both my girls were water babies though Jessica I was on a bed but thats different as she was so much smaller). x

 

[angelstardust]

Well done on making a decision.

You are allowed to have several wobbles between now and the big day.

Your baby girl will come home, happy, healthy and safe and you too can become addicted to buying pretty dresses.

 

[JASMAK]

I am having a repeat c-section (this will be my 3rd). I was shopping two days later with my daughter. My son I had issues, so I was sicker, but it was nothing to do with a section. This is a personal decision for you, and only you know what is right for you. Sorry for your loss hon.

 

[JASMAK]

Just read that you decided to give vaginal a go. Good for you hon!

 

[rachlouise25]

hi there hun seen your post so thought i would reply

well done on making a decision on having a natural birth ,

i totally understand your worries and concerns i lost my first bor son lachlan at 32 weeks stillborn ,when he was born which i did naturally he came out and the cord was wrapped tight around his neck ,they think that was the cause of him passing away ,

anyway i went on 15 months later i fell pregnant and i was adament cord accidents are very rare and very rearly does lightning strike twice ,so i decided i wanted a natural birth again ,i reached 31 weeks with my son whos now 10 months old and i had to have an emergancy c section i was ok as i knew he was in trouble so agreed to have it done i had a placenta abruption luckily hes here and doing well ,,,,

i agree the recovery is very long after i had the c section i seen other ladies up and about and i thoght i would be too ,i was ok for the first 24 hours then i started feeling really ill i couldnt get out of bed and when they made me i was in so much pain i was like that for a whole week they found an infection but couldnt find where too the resons for me being ill ,anyway i was hooked up on drips upon drips and my veins kept collapsing ,i wasnt happy at all and in the end i managed to be able to walk enough to tell them i wanted home so asked them to give me tablet form medication and i signed myself out as i was fed up of having needles put in me

everyone is diffrent tho and experiance a c section in diffrent ways some are good some not so good ,i was one of the unlucky ones who became ill

anyway im now 26wks pregnant and im absaloutley petrified because i think ive got to have another c section as i only had my previous one 10 months ago and im afraid i will be ill like last time ,

im really hopeing they will let me try natural as this pregnancy has been great so far i really have my fingers crossed for a natural delivery .........

i wish you the best in the rest of your pregnancy hun and that i know you will make the right decision for u and your baby xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx