Coming back from her dads a nightmare!

[Laura--x]

Maisies always been such a good girl, never really had tantrums, never hit/smacked/pinched ect and has always learnt things pretty quickly when it comes to what she can and cant do.

She went through a phase a good while ago where shed come home from her dads and be a total cow, draw on walls,smack/scratch me, shout at me and just general be horrible. After a day shed go back to herself. But its started again

Se always comes back really moody and obviously tired so its obvious she hasnt had a full nights sleep like she does here. Shes starting to be really cheeky, saying no to me when i say something to her, when i tell her off or tell her not to do something she'll hit me, only gently, but ill tell her not to do that and she'll keep doing it and smile.Its just not her, she doesnt do these things.

Its only ever when she comes back from her dads aswell, for the rest of the day shes home and then the day after shes usually ok, but sometimes itll take a full day to get over it.

What do i do? Ive mentioned it to him over and over and he says she doesnt do it there, but she must be. He has a little brother whos 5, i know she picks up alot from him. I cant say what hes like now as i dont know him, but when he was younger he was a little S***, swearing and all sorts and he never got discipline from it.

Im fedup of it now. I feel like giving up even teaching her right from wrong when all he does it muck it up all the bloody time!!!

 

[Maggs]

Maybe she's confused and doesn't understand why she goes between her father's house and your house? Sorry I don't have any experience with this as my stepson is 11 but a friend of mine is having the same issues with her 4 year old son and this her guess as to why he's misbehaving xx

 

[Donna35]

Sounds like she's picking it up from his little brother, watching the way he behaves and then bringing it home to your house. Have you mentioned this possibility to your ex? Are you on quite friendly terms with him and do you think he'll try to help resolve this?

 

[Laura--x]

Its definately not being confused going between the both as its been this way since she was 6 months so its the norm for her iykwim? She knows which days she goes to her dads and whatnot.

We were on friendly terms but he has these times where he turns into a complete ass, and nows one of them again. Definately not in a situation to speak to him about it yet as he'll just kick off majorly

 

[Jinty]

Sounds like shes picking up bad behaviour from them to me...

 

[angelpkj]

i think i have the answer!

my fob had a 5 year old daughter

good as gold for her mum but after a night seeing her father shed go home a little horrible brat

watching from the side lines it seemed to be like this
she would come over,want his attention or what ever play with him and he would just get bored after an hour so she would start acting up for the attention,asking for sweets when normally she doesnt wanting to go toilet wanting to go shop etc etc

after a while i noticed she would use her manners for me but not for him-she just had zero respect for him at all,she didnt need to use her manners because he never corrected her,he would swear and tell her not too if she repeated it but wouldnt realised where she heard it off

its really hard to try drill it into a fob how their behaviour and actions affect a child even once they go home

i think sitting down with your daughter mid week once shes back to her usual self and having a long chat,ask what she got up to with daddy,did he play with her or take her anywhere?does he give her lots of loves and cuddles? just questions like that
then i would reasure her daddy does love her blah blah and how he doesnt mean it blah (stupid fobs)

i think its just a cry for attention and thats how she feels she has to act at her dads,she needs realise acting like that when she gets home back to you won't get her the attention she wants