Crying. I hate Drs!!

[HHenderson]

Ive waited 9 years and NEVER thought we would even have another baby. I figured since 9 years ago things have changed for the better with hospitals, drs & equipment. 4D is new to me!

I have been struggling with my OB. I found out 5 weeks ago through a nurse because my doctor was in surgery all day that my chances of even having my Dr deliver my daughter will be a 1:7 chance. I am so friggon upset. Not only I like and trust her, I have become really comfortable with her and was excited to have her. But I find out Im paying out of pocket nearly $1400 and I might not have her. Chances are I wont.

Ive been stressed for weeks trying to find other options. I called my insurance company and they said I can switch to a new dr or midwife whenever I wanted. I originally wanted to go to a birthing center where a midwife was approved by my insurance but found out that they banned vbacs in birthing centers in like 2003 or something. So my next and last option was to see if the other midwife that was approved by my insurance would accept me. Well I just found out that even though she is covered the whole office is state funded maternity insurance only. WHAT THE HELL!! So then the nurse explained to me that unless you hire a doula (which I cannot afford) that no matter where I go the chances are all the same. Unless you are lucky and your doctor happens to be at the hospital the time of birth your doctor will be anyone who is there. Seriously!!

I am so exhausted by all of this. It makes me sick to my stomach that I cannot have what I want when its my body and my baby and my MONEY! If I knew the information I knew now about things when I was young and 19 I would of never elected to go in and be induced. I would of never had a c-section in the first place. Wish I was crazy and just had my baby in my jacuzzi tub at home by my damn self. But being a vbac I guess im just plain SCREWED.

 

[kirstybumx3]

im sorry that you are upset I don't have any suggestions sorry.. its different here in UK,. my midwife definitely wont be delivering my baby, in fact I wont know who is delivering my baby until I am in labour and go to the hospital, then its whoever is on duty at that time, and if they finish their shift before my baby is born, ill have someone else completely different maybe half way through =/ I guess it would be nice to get to know the person who will bring your baby into the world before the actual labour..
try not to get too upset hun, hope you can sort something xx

 

[d_b]

Is your doctor in surgery every day? Maybe you'll catch her on a slow day or in between surgeries. When I delivered DS the doctor only came in at the very end when DS arrived, and I didn't even notice her in the room until after! A resident doctor caught the baby but at the time the baby catcher was the last thing on my mind.

Here there is also a slim chance of getting your actual OB to deliver. I didn't meet any of the delivery nurses or doctors until that day. My OB came to see me the next day which was nice.

 

[HHenderson]

Is your doctor in surgery every day? Maybe you'll catch her on a slow day or in between surgeries. When I delivered DS the doctor only came in at the very end when DS arrived, and I didn't even notice her in the room until after! A resident doctor caught the baby but at the time the baby catcher was the last thing on my mind.

Not that I know of. I have never had a problem making an office appointment with her but one time so far and thats because my husband was trying to save his PTO's and I needed a day with him being off and it landed on a nurse instead. Thankfully because I would of never knew all of this and would of been so freaked in the end.

 

[mummie2be]

I am kinda in a similar situation. I absolutely love my doctor,but with there only being one hospital that delivers babies in my area then the chances of my doctor being on call are very slim. Our hospital caters to about 5 cities and various smaller towns.
It upsets me I wont have my doctor in the room with me.

 

[MissPolley]

i know how you feel, i hav no ideawho will be delivering my baby, though i kow for sure i will be wired up to a heart moniter constantly and not able to have a water birth. its not fair when you have your heart set on something and they just take it away like it shouldnt matter at all...

 

[CareM]

Awww.... I am so sorry to hear this

To be honest I have not even thought of my doctor not delivering until I read your post. I guess the only thing that we can do is cross our fingers and hope they are available when we need them.

I am not sure if it is different in the US then in Canada, but I have found that many of my friends all say that most of the labour they are working with the nurses. That they really only seen the doctor in the very final stretch (I could be wrong here). Please don't think I am downplaying your situation as it is sucks especially when you pay out so much to deliver at the hospital.

Crossing my fingers your OB delivers your baby!

 

[Mjane84]

I am sorry to hear that. I know how upsetting it is. My current OB's office has five Docs, and they are on call for different rotations. I've had appointments with all of them, so now it is just a matter of who is on call the day I go into labor.

Your Doc's office should have been way more up front with you so you knew this from the beginning. It's not something you need to be dealing with in your third tri!

 

[HHenderson]

i know how you feel, i hav no ideawho will be delivering my baby, though i kow for sure i will be wired up to a heart moniter constantly and not able to have a water birth. its not fair when you have your heart set on something and they just take it away like it shouldnt matter at all...

Thats another thing I hate. I was also told since a previous csection I will have to be constantly monitored. That just means to me a higher chance of csection again because laying in bed doesnt make you progress as it should IMO.

 

[HHenderson]

Awww.... I am so sorry to hear this

To be honest I have not even thought of my doctor not delivering until I read your post. I guess the only thing that we can do is cross our fingers and hope they are available when we need them.

I am not sure if it is different in the US then in Canada, but I have found that many of my friends all say that most of the labour they are working with the nurses. That they really only seen the doctor in the very final stretch (I could be wrong here). Please don't think I am downplaying your situation as it is sucks especially when you pay out so much to deliver at the hospital.

Crossing my fingers your OB delivers your baby!

Yes it is the same way here. At least it was 9 years ago. My nurse I had most of the time, I even remember her name! But she was so fricken nice! In the end I did get to see my midwife and male doctor who I knew if I needed a c-section he was the ONLY one who did it. Which I needed and he did an amazing job.

 

[HHenderson]

I am sorry to hear that. I know how upsetting it is. My current OB's office has five Docs, and they are on call for different rotations. I've had appointments with all of them, so now it is just a matter of who is on call the day I go into labor.

Your Doc's office should have been way more up front with you so you knew this from the beginning. It's not something you need to be dealing with in your third tri!

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT!!! I would of never known until delivery and would of been so upset my doctor was no where to be found and some random dude came in. Ugh! I even asked my Dr. how she was doing c-sections and she told me how awesome she does them. That is the point where she should have told me it might not even be her doing it. So far I have only seen her and they havent rotated me. Thank goodness because I dont like dudes and I would of been pissed and cancelled. Lol

 

[juhnayrae]

I'm so sorry! We somewhat dealt with this at the beginning of our pregnancy trying to find a doctor that would do the kind of birth we wanted. We really want as natural a birth as possible, which my OBGYN was all for, but there are 5 other doctors in his office, so I had no guarantee of delivering with HIM and getting the type of birth I really wanted.

We were lucky enough that there's a midwife group we were able to switch to. They do natural hospital births, but have a doctor that they collaborate with in case something goes wrong. So I shouldn't be seeing any random doctors.

The whole process was so stressful...

I hope it all gets worked out for you

 

[HHenderson]

I'm so sorry! We somewhat dealt with this at the beginning of our pregnancy trying to find a doctor that would do the kind of birth we wanted. We really want as natural a birth as possible, which my OBGYN was all for, but there are 5 other doctors in his office, so I had no guarantee of delivering with HIM and getting the type of birth I really wanted.

We were lucky enough that there's a midwife group we were able to switch to. They do natural hospital births, but have a doctor that they collaborate with in case something goes wrong. So I shouldn't be seeing any random doctors.

The whole process was so stressful...

I hope it all gets worked out for you

I wish there was a special person besides a doula that knows what I want and would be my voice while I am in labor. I get nervous sometimes and dont think and just 'do' what the dr wants and dont ask questions but this time around its not going to happen. I have a feeling I will be pressured at many points to do stuff I dont want. My husband is NO help because he just thinks 'ANYTHING' that needs to be done to make it quick and safe, it should be done without question. Um no! lol

 

[AvianasMommy]

So sorry to hear you're upset . That's the case with me as well. I was 19 when I had my daughter too... failed induction followed by a c-section. The first time around, I was freaking out at the thought of him not delivering my daughter. I was relieved when he suggested induction since I knew he'd be there. I had never seen any of the other doctors in the practice, just him. He scheduled my induction for a day he was there and also wound up doing my c-section which I was grateful for (not that I wanted a c-section, but glad he did it).

Now, I'm seeing him again and there's still 3 other doctors in the practice besides him (I've only seen 1 so far). He's the one who actually suggested doing a VBAC. I'm trying to come to grips with the fact that he might not be delivering this baby but it really concerns me because I'm high risk, have lots of issues with GD and PIH. I just feel like he is familiar with my situation/issues, delivered my last baby, and I've been seeing him all along... I just don't feel comfortable that I could possibly have a different person that doesn't know anything about me except what's in my paperwork. My girlfriend at work went to him to and he wasn't on call when she went into labor so she had a doctor she had never met before. It was devastating for her. I'm just trying not to get myself to worked up about it. But I totally understand why you're upset. Your doctor knows you best and to have someone knew step in at a time like that can be disappointing. Hoping for the best for you hun .

 

[CatherineK]

There are still some docs out there that are hands on and on call for their own patients. Through four pregnancies, my doc has been at all my deliveries, surgeries, and every single appointment I've had. He is my rock, quite honestly. Him and his nurse, who is always there too. So you just have to look around. Good luck!!

 

[sue_88]

This is why I am booked for a homebirth.

I know that when that person knocks on my door when I am in labour it will be a familiar face of my midwives. And if I happen to get trasnferred to hospital they will come with me.

I would not accept that going into hospital I have got Mrs. Stranger delivering my child. No thanks.

 

[HHenderson]

This is why I am booked for a homebirth.

I know that when that person knocks on my door when I am in labour it will be a familiar face of my midwives. And if I happen to get trasnferred to hospital they will come with me.

I would not accept that going into hospital I have got Mrs. Stranger delivering my child. No thanks.

If I wasnt a vbac Id be going to a birth center to have my water birth naturally.