Dealing with naughtiness in public

[beanzz]

Just curious, how do you handle your child(ren) when they are being naughty in public? What punishment do you give whilst you are away from home?

I can usually settle any problem by taking Oaks away so we're alone (to the side if we're outside, toilets if we're in a restaurant, etc.) and talking to him but obviously this doesn't always work.

This morning was one of those times it didn't work and I let myself get too worked up over it and could feel all eyes on me in the doctors waiting room as I had to repeat myself and ask him to stop what felt like a thousand times. I was too paranoid about sounding too harsh or too soft to be able to even be able to come up with a punishment on the spot. I just wanted to run home and cry

Now we're expecting #2 I really need to hear other people's methods and try them out see if they work for us. Or even maybe to know I'm not alone in having moments I want to cry like a baby myself

 

[DCS]

I have no advice. DS has always been lovely when out. Never had any temper tantrums or running away or any " bad behaviour" apart from whinging when we go shopping, so we just go when he is at school.
DD on the other hand, has started throwing her self to the floor in a dramatic fashion, refusing to walk, throwing her hands up in the air while shouting no over and over again. She will be 2 next month. I have to admit, I always get realy self conscious, and get all red in the face. I try to explain that whatever she doing is not ok, and she has until the count of 4 to stop. Then I count to four slowly while showing her fingers. She doesn't talk much so I try to keep it simple and visual. When she is laying on the floor, I'm the parent who makes sure she is safe, and I leave her to it. And just stand there till she is done. Usualy once she releases she isn't getting anywhere she stops. Other times I scoop her up kicking and screaming and move her. Like I said she doesn't talk much ( 25 words/ names in total) so we can't exactly discuss the problem. With DS ( who is 5) we usualy go over the rules before we go places, no running away, no screaming, etc and explain if we don't follow rules we will be going home.
Stalking to see what others suggest.

 

[Angelbaby_01]

My daughter loves attention and sometimes tend to act out to see if the other person would comfort her when I am strict, so I would just whisper in her ear that we will have a talk in the bathroom which stops her mostly in her tracks and I think first off she don't like to leave the said company, feel embarrassed and maybe also not sure how I will handle it. lol My mom always counted and before she could go to three me and my brother stopped - I still don't know what would have happened is she had to count to three. haha so maybe same principle.

 

[.Mrs.B.]

My only advice would be to ignore what people might be thinking and handle how you usually do.

I got a full on public smack in the face from my tiny 2 year old yesterday, she had come off a bouncy castle and only wanted one shoe on. It was so hard I gasped and when I turned my head I saw a lady trying not to laugh at me, lol.

 

[SarahBear]

I don't tend to think in terms of punishments. In terms of being paranoid about what others think, I feel like I'm getting better about being confident in my parenting such that I'm not so worried about what others think. In terms of coming up with a "punishment on the spot," I don't tend to think in terms of punishment. I think in terms of problem solving. Thinking on the spot can be tricky either way.

 

[Kate&Lucas]

I feel like I'm much better at handling naughtiness when there are eyes on me, I can't do my usual shout at him and send him off upstairs for five minutes

If we're out and Lucas won't stop doing something, instead of telling him off I try to distract him with something else. The Drs is a really easy one too because of all the colourful leaflets (I pick one up, tell him to close his eyes, take his finger and rest it on the leaflet, then get him to guess what colour he's touching) - reeeaally good for keeping his mind away from whatever naughty thing he was trying to do.
Any distracting game usually does the trick tbh. He doesn't have tantrums anymore but when he did it was a good way to stop them before they started.

Proper naughtiness or bad attitude is given a last chance with an ultimatum if he does it again. If we're on a day out the utimatum is usually that we go home or he can't get a treat he was going to get, if it's somewhere we can't leave then he would have to sit quietly with no playing.

You're not alone in those moments though. Sometimes when Lucas was much smaller we'd both end up sobbing

 

[BabyBlondex]

My 2 are not genunly naughty while out, but they act like spoilt brats! If they aint allowed something they scream and cry and nearly vomit until I'm basically dying of embarrassment!!! I end up giving in, my fault!!

 

[xxsteffyxx]

Ignore others around you and carry on the way you would at any other time.

The only reason I say that is because our lad soon learned that out in public he received a lighter punishment, so he would play up more. Husband and I are on the same page with discipline so we don't have that problem.

Harvey would receive a smack on the bun or on the hand should he play up in public or at home. It's not everyone's cup of tea, husband and I were both smacked as kids and personally we know the difference between smacking and beating a child. We have even smacked Harvey's bum in front of a health visitor when he spat at her. So I don't personally see the harm in that sort of punishment. Same out as in.

I know smacking isn't everyone's way of discipline, it's always a last resort and we always explain why we are doing it. I don't want a lecture from anyone regarding discipline - just adding my two cents to this ladies question 😄