Dilemma of sorts..

[Gia7777]

Hi ladies - I also posted this over in 3rd tri but after thinking realized I should have just posted it here and see what some of you think... Part of me feels like I can handle this situation just fine on my own but the other part of me really wants hubby here as we tried for sooo long for this baby and it was only after we 'gave up trying' that we succeeded.

****

Let me preface this by saying I am all for letting baby come when baby is ready - and not intervening with an induction for pure scheduling convenience, however, I do have a situation which I am sure am not the first to experience and wanted to see what some other ladies would do/have done in a similar situation.

My hubby is away for unavoidable training for a period of a few months, and as a result, will likely miss the birth of our son, should we let nature run it's course....However, if I were to opt for an induction close to my due date and close to a weekend (provided LO stays put until then), then my husband could schedule a flight back (6 hrs away) for the birth.

What would you ladies do if you knew that your OH would not be with you for the birth, but that with a scheduled induction, he could be? I'm torn in many ways as I really want the birth to happen naturally but it is also very important to us both that he be here if he can...

What would you do in this situation?

Thanks.

 

[mtnprotracy]

I would schedule the induction. Every birth situation is different, but I was induced with my first. It went splendidly. Good luck . It sure is getting close now....induction or not .

 

[dachsundmom]

I agree...if your doctor is comfortable doing it, having DH there will be worth it to you; these are the memories you can't get back.

 

[Indigo77]

I agree....I would schedule the induction...

 

[Garnet]

I had my oldest son without his dad being the and it sucked. It is such a wonderful time for both you and your husband to bond so yes I would induce.

 

[Gia7777]

Thanks girls. I guess I am just really torn - as much as I want Hubby there....I want just as much to allow things to progress as they normally would - I have been so fortunate thus far problem free and I'm afraid if I mess with nature I may cause there to be a problem that otherwise wouldn't, if that makes sense. I've heard some great induction experiences, and some nightmare ones, as with anything I guess, but this is a tough one for me to decide.

 

[Maple Leaf]

Just want to send you some

You have a big decision ahead of you, I can't tell you what you should do. I agree with all the ladies have said about how you can't get the moment back etc...but I also agree with why you want to let things happen naturally.....

Sorry I'm no help, but I'm thinking of you. X

 

[urchin]

gosh - that's quite a dilemma, I can see why you're wrestling with it

I think if it were me, the need to have daddy there at the birth would win out ... there is no one else I want there to support me - and although there are plenty who would if Mr Urch weren't able to, they would be a very very poor second best.

 

[suzimc]

I'd do the induction thing if it was me honey, I'd hate to be without my husband for the birth xx

 

[DeeM73]

Oh poor you I think we would all want our OH's there for the birth and I can see why you would want to let nature take it's course too.If the doctor was happy enough to induce me then I would go for it x

 

[vintage67]

I would absolutely opt for daddy to be there if it were me!

 

[Storm1jet2]

I know having my DH there was invaluable for me - not sure I would have coped half as well without him - he was such a fantastic support the whole way through my labour especially as I'd left it too late for additional pain relief and it was gas and air all the way.

Do what you and your hubby think is best for you both, its entirely your decision. You are lucky to have the option, they won't do what the call social inductions over here

 

[Borboleta]

I would do the induction too. I understand your fear. It took us a while to get pregnant too and this is our first baby. But remember that your hubby is as part of this process as you and baby are. I just think that an experience like that should not be missed by anyone. And because of our age God knows when and if that will happen again. Talk to your doctor and see if he can ease your mind to do the induction.

I know p ersonally I would hate not having my husband there during birth. I am already mad at him because he has a meeting tomorrow about 2 1/2 hours away from where I am and I keep telling him not to go in case baby decides to come tomorrow!!

 

[zennie]

I'd choose induction if the consultant/obs were happy to do it. I'm sure you really want your partner by your side and he wouldnt want to miss this for the world.
Wishing you the best of luck

 

[SabrinaKat]

I'll add my 'two cents worth' and agree with all the other ladies! If your doctor is agreeable, then absolutely schedule it and have your OH there -- it will relax you a lot, give you comfort and support and even tho it isn't 'natural' per se, both of you will remember this day for the rest of your life!

I have to have an emergency c-section last week and having my OH there kept me calm. Unfortunately, I had some complications (bleeding) and my OH was kicked out while they all stood around, deciding what to do, and THAT terrified me (bleeding was from a loose staple), fortunately, he was quickly allowed back in!

best wishes

 

[SabrinaKat]

I'll add my 'two cents worth' and agree with all the other ladies! If your doctor is agreeable, then absolutely schedule it and have your OH there -- it will relax you a lot, give you comfort and support and even tho it isn't 'natural' per se, both of you will remember this day for the rest of your life!

I have to have an emergency c-section last week and having my OH there kept me calm. Unfortunately, I had some complications (bleeding) and my OH was kicked out while they all stood around, deciding what to do, and THAT terrified me (bleeding was from a loose staple), fortunately, he was quickly allowed back in!

best wishes

 

[Maple Leaf]

Hey Gia - did you make any decisions yet? X

 

[Gia7777]

Hey Maple Leaf - Thanks for asking! I need to stop this madness of searching the internet, I should know better. I'm still very much torn, and even more so after talking with 2 of my neighbors. One was induced and had no problems whatsoever, and the other was induced and ended up having a section after a long labor and no dilation progression.

Anyone who knows me well knows that when presented with a decision that has to be made, I do my research and then think about it for a day or two and then make the decision, and be done with it - but I'm really still struggling with it. What is making it even more difficult is that my OB is completely leaving it up to me after giving me all the info on it and is comfortable with whichever I decide.

I'm almost tempted to flip a coin at this point as crazy as that sounds.

 

[DeeM73]

That's the only thing about the internet,so easy to search things.When I had my two kids 12 and 13 years ago we didn't have the net which in a sense was a blessing,now I'm constantly looking and know I shouldn't I really don't know what I would do either guess I would have to be in that situation.Good luck with whatever go decide x

 

[MrsR3AM5]

How does your husband feel? I would say, go with the induction...I'm pondering induction just so my sister can be here (my parents have both passed on, and she's the closest person other than DH that I want here immediately after the baby arrives).

Hope you can make a decision you feel good about soon!