Does anyone else get hassled about not using bowls or cutlery with BLW?

[baileybubs]

Hi everyone!

Just a little rant really, we are doing BLW and so my dd gets her food on her tray of the hight chair and eats with her fingers. She's mastered an excellent pincer grip and I think has improved her coordination skills really well. I think she's not ready to use a spoon by herself (I do try but she likes to just bang it about for now) and there's no way I would use a bowl for her food as she'd just fling it.

But people keep commenting on the lack of spoon and bowl and it's really annoying me!! Does anyone else get this? Sick of explaining that it's about learning and play at her age.

 

[Noodlebear]

We didn't do BLW but have always given LO lots of finger foods and moved him on from purees quicker than most. I remember feeding him a JP with beans or something and was letting him pick at it as we went along and my nan went off on a huge rant about all these mums nowadays letting babies get right in there wit their fingers and make a horrendous mess etc etc. Yawn! I told her what it was but it's a strange concept to a lot of people.

 

[MindUtopia]

My MIL has made a few comments about how she hopes she isn't 5 and still not using cutlery. She visited a friend and her granddaughter (who's 5 years old...not 10 months!) was eating spaghetti with her hands. I was just like, um, 10 month olds don't use forks and knives. I'm not sure it had anything to do with BLW specifically and she otherwise thinks how she eats is fantastic (as do most people, I get many more positive comments about BLW than negative), but I think some people just forget that babies aren't neat eaters no matter how you feed them and everything is developmental. They don't just fall out of the womb able to use a fork and knife and I think older people who haven't had babies of their own in awhile forget about this.

 

[Rachel_C]

I don't remember hearing anybody say anything negative but I wouldn't have let it get to you. I think BLW babies probably learn to use cutlery and bowls sooner than TW babies because, as you've said, they develop better co-ordination early on. I'm quite confident my kids eat with a knife and fork better than many other kids the same age so although it might be a bit messier in the short term, it pays off!

I did introduce bowls right from the start with my two and they've always had a spoon or a fork at the table too. By 8 months, they were able to dip a spoon, swirl it round in something like yoghurt or porridge and then lick it off the spoon. They didn't learn to scoop food until a bit later but they managed to eat a surprising amount in that way and it encouraged them to keep trying. I don't think there's a need to introduce cutlery, especially at your LO's age, but if you do it's possible LO will be able to use it a bit quite soon. I generally held a little bowl until I was sure LO wouldn't throw it, then showed her how to dip in a spoon and said, "Dip dip" then gave her the spoon and said it again. We had one of those suction mats for a while but didn't bother after a while as LO figured out how to remove it anyway.

 

[baileybubs]

Thanks ladies, I think it's just getting annoying coz it's the same people saying it again and again "still not using a bowl and spoon I see" NO!

Rachel what's these suction mats? My MIL said you can get bowls that have suction so she can't throw it and I've considered that just so she can get used to having a bowl and that "dip dip" idea sounds good (currently I get yoghurt flipped all over me when I give her the spoon lol!).

But yeah most people do just say how good she is at eating which makes me so proud so i should just ignore the negatives, it's mainly MIL and another relative on df's side who seem to think she should already be eating with by adult standards lol!

 

[HKateH]

Yup. I'm sick of batting away comments like "Do you not have plates in your house?" or my personal favourite "Next thing he'll need to learn is table manners" !!!

He's eight months old!

 

[baileybubs]

Not just me then Kate! I even had one relative buy her a bowl and plate for Christmas (someone who mentions she doesn't use them) which I just thought was rude! My parenting choice is to BLW and I feel she's too young for cutlery and happy as she is using her tray so leave us be lol!

 

[HKateH]

Not just me then Kate! I even had one relative buy her a bowl and plate for Christmas (someone who mentions she doesn't use them) which I just thought was rude! My parenting choice is to BLW and I feel she's too young for cutlery and happy as she is using her tray so leave us be lol!

My LO had a bowl and plate bought for Christmas too! They are lovely and I will keep them for when LO is older and using them BUT they were a gift from BIL and SIL. SIL is so wrapped up in herself that she hasn't even noticed we are BLW - she thinks she knows everything about babies and children yet has no interest in mine lol. Gah!

 

[special_kala]

All mine have been BLW so this could be a silly question but surely even TW babies dont actually use a spoon at this age, they are fed with a spoon but they dont do it themselves.

We pre load spoons for them to put in their mouths (eyes, over the shoulder) themselves but do these people expect a 8 month old to be able to scoop the food up themselves?

I dont introduce plates until over a year because lets face it all they are going to do is chuck it on the floor.

Ignore those people they are clearly not realising that your baby is a littler person not a mini adult.

 

[baileybubs]

This is what I thought too kala, i think those who ask are probably used to older babies eating the things that my dd does and so they seem to expect the use of cutlery and bowls! In a way I get why they ask but it's the repetition that frustrates me, coz like you say do they seriously expect an 8 month old to be able to use a spoon and not chuck a bowl on the floor? Lol!

 

[HKateH]

Or to not get mash round his face when he's cramming shepherd's pie into his mouth... Or to eat with his mouth closed and not let food dribble out... In fact, why do I even put a bib on him; clearly he should be able to eat without getting food down his front!

 

[Snow Owl]

We were a mixture of BLW and TW but if I gave Dylan a bowl he'd chuck it straight on the floor!

Surely all babies are like this???

My MIL does not get this and keeps giving him a china plate and complains when I take it away!!

 

[summer rain]

My youngest has a suction bowl. He worked out after about 10 seconds of use how to loosen the suction so he can pick it up and send it flying! My second youngest had zero interest in feeding himself cutlery until he was about 15 months when he suddenly started using a spoon to eat rice, without making any mess at all. He had clearly been observing and learning but just wasn't interested before that point xx

 

[baileybubs]

Not just me who gets the MIL commenting or trying to change it then Snow Owl? My dd was sick the other day and MIL said "maybe it's because you let her eat however much she wants and so she's made herself sick eating too much".......I don't just give her the contents of the fridge you know woman, I give her a baby-sized portion and she can eat as much or as little as that as she feels! Sometimes I wonder if she engages her brain lol!

Summer rain - aha so as I suspected those suction bowls don't work either, thanks I'll tell MIL next time she suggests it (again!) lol

 

[Snow Owl]

We tried Dylan with a suction bowl at Kiddicare recently and he ripped it off in seconds!

 

[Noo]

Is this not why high chairs have trays???