Does anyone ever worry...

[Augie]

Sorry for being somewhat off topic. But does anyone here ever worry or think about how having a baby will change their relationship with their OH? good or bad? I've just been kind of thinking about it today and wondered what everyone else thought... (this is what happens when you have a SIX hour lay over in the airport waiting for the midnight flight!!)

 

[MrsBroodyPant]

Yes I've thought about it. I think it will change for good and some for bad. Having a child must be an amazing bond and to have such a wonderful thing in common that u created together! I think something bad would be neglecting one another as hubby/wife so would need to make a special effort to keep the flame alive and no forget who you are. X

 

[joeybrooks]

Yes, but I pretty much worry about everything.

I worry what the sleepless nights will do to us, I wonder if we will have different ideas on parenting techniques, I worry that we wont get to spend as much quality time together as normal, I worry that we will lose our spontaniaty (wrong spelling, sorry).

But... on the other hand, I hope that the sleepless nights, when one person gets up to allow the other to sleep will show how much we truely love each other (don't remind me of this at 4am when I am nursing a screaming baby) and how we will learn a new side to each other when we show our parenting techniques and that the time we do spend together will be even more precious because it is more rare and that even though we cannot just do things at the drop of a hat, the things we can do may have to be planned, but they will be all more more appreciated for it.

I think you can see the cons in any situation, with something so life changing it is important to think it through first, but when I do this, I always just come to the conclusion that we both want a child and we both love each other, so it will "just work out".

 

[aimee-lou]

Most of the time it's true that having a baby will either make or break a relationship. My hubby and I are very strong but even we had cross words at 3am when Earl was very small and was crying for a feed.

It's not something that can be planned for though, and if you both want a child, a family and a future, then you should be able to work through the hard and challenging times and then reap the rewards together. For me, when Earl was about 6 weeks old, bedtime routine was in place, and we sat down to watch a 2 hour movie undisturbed, with a chinese takeaway and a bar of chocolate, we suddenly realised that we were a couple again and cuddled up on the sofa together like a couple of teenagers lol

 

[Augie]

Most of the time it's true that having a baby will either make or break a relationship. My hubby and I are very strong but even we had cross words at 3am when Earl was very small and was crying for a feed.

It's not something that can be planned for though, and if you both want a child, a family and a future, then you should be able to work through the hard and challenging times and then reap the rewards together. For me, when Earl was about 6 weeks old, bedtime routine was in place, and we sat down to watch a 2 hour movie undisturbed, with a chinese takeaway and a bar of chocolate, we suddenly realised that we were a couple again and cuddled up on the sofa together like a couple of teenagers lol

I love hearing your experience!

 

[MintChocChip]

Aimee-lou that is a fab experience -hope I get to that point in the not so distant future.

Augie I think its natural to worry about the changes having a baby will have on your relationship and its bound to change but hopefully as others have said some for good and some for bad.

Im worried about lack of sleep Im a complete witch when Im tired

 

[polaris]

Most of the time it's true that having a baby will either make or break a relationship. My hubby and I are very strong but even we had cross words at 3am when Earl was very small and was crying for a feed.

It's not something that can be planned for though, and if you both want a child, a family and a future, then you should be able to work through the hard and challenging times and then reap the rewards together. For me, when Earl was about 6 weeks old, bedtime routine was in place, and we sat down to watch a 2 hour movie undisturbed, with a chinese takeaway and a bar of chocolate, we suddenly realised that we were a couple again and cuddled up on the sofa together like a couple of teenagers lol

I would agree with Aimee Lou's experience. Having a baby both put a lot of pressure on the relationship but also strengthened it in ways I couldn't have imagined. However, it took a bit longer than six weeks before Thomas had any sort of bedtime routine established, he was a bit of a colicky baby and we were chronically sleep deprived for the first four months. Remind me why I want to put myself through this again?? LOL.