double trouble

[Hotbump]

Jovanni (6years old): He loves to draw, he even got an art award at his kindergarten graduation ceremony. Problem is he draws on anything he can get his hands on! Ever since he was 4 I would explained to him that we don't draw on furniture, books or anything besides coloring books or paper. I don't know what to do with him. The walls are covered in drawings and his white dresser is the same.

Jr (turning 5): He talks back A LOT! I tell him to look for his shoes and just turns around and says he can't find it He also whines a lot even to the point of crying when I ask him to do something and he says he can't do it. He cries/whines for just about anything!

I'm at a loss with both of my boys.

 

[OmarsMum]

With the 1st I'd take away the colours & pens until he starts to draw on papers/ board. It's a consequence not punishment. DS went through this phase he used to colour on the duvet and his arms! He's old enough to understand consequences.


As for the whining, try another way of encouragement, like making it a competition "can you find your shoes before I'm done counting to 10?" , "let's race to the room & see if you can clean up the toys faster the me" and so on.

When Omar whines I clearly tell him it will get him nowhere, and I will not listen until he stops whining/ crying. He rarely whine or cry those days but he was too sensitive & he used to cry for nothing when he was younger

 

[Cattia]

I have a whiner too, it drives me mad! I tell her that I can't understand her unless she talks in a normal voice. It can take a while to get through to her but in the end she realises that if she wants me to listen she needs to stop with the whining! She is also over sensitive and cries at the smallest thing. If she says she can't do something I threaten a consequence, but try to do it in a non confrontational way. So for example, if she wont get herself dressed, rather than yelling at her 'get dressed or we are not going to your friend's house (which is what I used to do) I try now to say calmly 'oh that's a shame, if you can't get dressed I guess we can't go to xxx house today then and we will have to stay in'. I find that it sometimes works!

 

[Hotbump]

I have a whiner too, it drives me mad! I tell her that I can't understand her unless she talks in a normal voice. It can take a while to get through to her but in the end she realises that if she wants me to listen she needs to stop with the whining! She is also over sensitive and cries at the smallest thing. If she says she can't do something I threaten a consequence, but try to do it in a non confrontational way. So for example, if she wont get herself dressed, rather than yelling at her 'get dressed or we are not going to your friend's house (which is what I used to do) I try now to say calmly 'oh that's a shame, if you can't get dressed I guess we can't go to xxx house today then and we will have to stay in'. I find that it sometimes works!

See when I do that he'll just cry more. It really tests my patience because he refuses to do anything without whining.