Ex is coming for his first visit and lo is almost 1

[lovejoy]

I haven't seen my ex since feb 2012 when I was pregnant with our 2nd lo. He has since ran off to another country got new career and girl, yay for him (not)

We hadn't spoken for over a year because, well it was a messy and long break up. I hate the fact he abandon the kids and I've have to get in contact with him to get him to see them. Anyway his family who also live aboard are flying in for a visit and last week he messaged me saying surprise his coming too.

Although, I've wanted him to come because I think its ridiculous that the kids haven't seen them in that long and our second hasn't even met him, I have no idea how to feel? I feel abit awkward and nervous now. I'm kinda glad his family will be there, but it does feel like I'm being investigated or something.

Also he hasn't told me about his girlfriend, but what if he tries to bring her another on of his surprises I feel it's important for it to be just family and outsider because it's been soo long.

Our second lo is going to be 1 in a few weeks time has this happened to anyone else? How did you get through it without wanting to cry or kill him etc

 

[bbkf]

Gee awkward situation :/ dont really have any advice but if it was me id be asking why the hell he hasnt made an effort to be in contact with his children That's just me tho I think id be mad!

Will it just be a one off thing and then back to his life again or is it the start of regular contact and visits?

Just be strong tho show him you dont need him and your raising amazing babies without him suppose thats all you can do :/

 

[Mummy1995]

1. He's an arsehole.
2. You're an amazing mummy for allowing him to sew your LOs when jes made 0 effort.

It does sound very awkward but just try and ignore it. When they come in ask them if they'd like a drink and go from there! Although I agree with the girlfriend thing.. It's gonna be overwhelming enough for all of you without some woman you don't know walking in too! Don't forget it's your home you can allow or disallow who you want, when you want.

Hope it goes ok, let us know x

 

[lovejoy]

Gee awkward situation :/ dont really have any advice but if it was me id be asking why the hell he hasnt made an effort to be in contact with his children That's just me tho I think id be mad!

Will it just be a one off thing and then back to his life again or is it the start of regular contact and visits?

Just be strong tho show him you dont need him and your raising amazing babies without him suppose thats all you can do :/

I have thought about it, but it's more headache than it's worth and really no answer he gives is gonna be good enough anyway. I'll just cry 20 times before they come and paint a smile on before they come