Father at 11, youngest in Britian

[Nibblenic]

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/...sY5qXnGvWJqEWW2GuZBGY4xNwZDZD&expires_in=6627

I think the bit that shocked me the most is the part his mother said. Its not like he was playing cars and coincidently impregnated a 15 year old!
Im sure the girl will do fine with the obvious support from her family. However what can a father with an 11 year age gap ever hope to teach his son or daughter. Especially when he is very obviously being babied by his mother.
I know siblings with bigger age gaps.

 

[vaniilla]

I remember this story when it came out. I think its horrifying and the parents of these two kids disgusting. I'm not going to say more because I don't want to offend anyone.

 

[Quackquack99]

I'm just suprised that he managed to have sex at the age of 11! Shocking. I think it would be easy to blame the parents but we do live in a society where sex is everywhere. But then again the parents do have to take blame.

 

[Andypanda6570]

I find it sad, that is all I will say also

 

[summer rain]

The story is from 1997 so their baby will be 14 now xx

 

[summer rain]

This is a follow up story from 2009, it didn't end well

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1151484/The-boy-father-12-calls-jail-cell-home.html

 

[Andypanda6570]

This is a follow up story from 2009, it didn't end well

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1151484/The-boy-father-12-calls-jail-cell-home.html

Holy crapola!! I didn't know that GeeZ, thanks ..
I meant to quote your first post not this one..

 

[JASMAK]

Awe, sad ending, but I am not sure if you took the baby out of the equation, his life would have been much better. Sounds like he had family issues and there was alot more going on for him.

 

[summer rain]

Awe, sad ending, but I am not sure if you took the baby out of the equation, his life would have been much better. Sounds like he had family issues and there was alot more going on for him.

Yes I think so as well, just a bit sad that he no longer sees his child and is generally quite messed up sounding

 

[Nibblenic]

Thats such a shame. I think we oftern hear and think about 'lost mothers' who dont cope with having a child early in life but its rare we hear about negative outcomes of the fathers.

 

[Lightworker]

Sad. You know what I think though? I think if the press never published that story, there might have been a different outcome.

Reason being that I can imagine how much stigma he must have faced in his every - day life. People don't exactly react positively to such things, and perhaps instead of the community rallying round him to help promote the best possible outcome, they might have condemned him (or his mom) or whatever.

This is my thinking. I think its sad, but I also think that the outcome was not necessarily the only possible one, although perhaps given modern society, it was the most predictable one. x

 

[JASMAK]

Sad. You know what I think though? I think if the press never published that story, there might have been a different outcome.

Reason being that I can imagine how much stigma he must have faced in his every - day life. People don't exactly react positively to such things, and perhaps instead of the community rallying round him to help promote the best possible outcome, they might have condemned him (or his mom) or whatever.

This is my thinking. I think its sad, but I also think that the outcome was not necessarily the only possible one, although perhaps given modern society, it was the most predictable one. x

Yeah, that is a good point too.

 

[Baby France]

Sad. You know what I think though? I think if the press never published that story, there might have been a different outcome.

Reason being that I can imagine how much stigma he must have faced in his every - day life. People don't exactly react positively to such things, and perhaps instead of the community rallying round him to help promote the best possible outcome, they might have condemned him (or his mom) or whatever.

This is my thinking. I think its sad, but I also think that the outcome was not necessarily the only possible one, although perhaps given modern society, it was the most predictable one. x

I understand what you're saying but in reality for him to be involved and having sex at 11, he wasn't the innocent little boy to begin with was he?

And I'm not sure how being in the paper at eleven (and not heard about again until the next baby daddy) means that it affected him to commit crimes and for him to be put inside.

I think it would be quite interesting to see how his six other siblings turned out tbh

 

[JASMAK]

Sad. You know what I think though? I think if the press never published that story, there might have been a different outcome.

Reason being that I can imagine how much stigma he must have faced in his every - day life. People don't exactly react positively to such things, and perhaps instead of the community rallying round him to help promote the best possible outcome, they might have condemned him (or his mom) or whatever.

This is my thinking. I think its sad, but I also think that the outcome was not necessarily the only possible one, although perhaps given modern society, it was the most predictable one. x

I understand what you're saying but in reality for him to be involved and having sex at 11, he wasn't the innocent little boy to begin with was he?

And I'm not sure how being in the paper at eleven (and not heard about again until the next baby daddy) means that it affected him to commit crimes and for him to be put inside.

I think it would be quite interesting to see how his six other siblings turned out tbh

OK, I kind of thought that too, but then though, well, maybe boys ARE having sex at that age...good grief..my son better not be!!! But, yeah..I mean WHAT 11 year old is even having sex...or even dating?! Sounds like there was alot more going on for him. And yes...the criminal activity...probably not necessarily stemming from the media, although, I do think that could have complicated matters (perhaps trying to get a job etc). At the end of the day..this child had ALOT more going on for him, for sure.

 

[Baby France]

Yes I think he had a lot more going on for him too. Its quite sad that his innocence at that age isn't what I hope for my own children.

I know that only time will tell, but for him to be meeting up with this 15 year old girl on a regular basis, what did his mum and her mum think they were upto?

If my 11 year old boy was hanging out with a 15 year old girl....ALARM bells would be ringing!

 

[Lightworker]

Sad. You know what I think though? I think if the press never published that story, there might have been a different outcome.

Reason being that I can imagine how much stigma he must have faced in his every - day life. People don't exactly react positively to such things, and perhaps instead of the community rallying round him to help promote the best possible outcome, they might have condemned him (or his mom) or whatever.

This is my thinking. I think its sad, but I also think that the outcome was not necessarily the only possible one, although perhaps given modern society, it was the most predictable one. x

I understand what you're saying but in reality for him to be involved and having sex at 11, he wasn't the innocent little boy to begin with was he?

And I'm not sure how being in the paper at eleven (and not heard about again until the next baby daddy) means that it affected him to commit crimes and for him to be put inside.

I think it would be quite interesting to see how his six other siblings turned out tbh

TBH, at the age of 11, I am still disinclined to expect a fully formed moral compass and as such, I don't see him as "not innocent". I don't think that he was fully aware of his actions and their consequences.

What I meant by the media and how it influenced the outcome was that the press are very sensationalist, and there is overwhelming evidence that the press influences public opinion to a significant extent.

If the articles were written in a positive light (which they wouldn't be, as that wouldn't sell papers), things may have been different.

This boy is perhaps a classic example of the self-fulfilling prophecy in that society expected him (and probably told him) that he would fail as a dad by virtue of his age.

When those odds are stacked against you, at that tender age (yes, 11 is tender), then chances are you are doomed.

If this story had not been published, and also if society reacted positively, a different outcome would have been possible.

 

[Nibblenic]

He moved though, so when he moved. No one would have needed to know who he was. He photo doesnt seem to have been published.

The mum did well enough for herself even though the media slammed her. And she was openly meeting with the. She wasnt sitting in a council house on benefits doing petty crime, in and out of jail with SS involved with her kids. So on the same side of the coin if the same media didnt badly affect her life when she was set up to fail it didnt have to affect this boys either

 

[Baby France]

I need to look for an article that I read a couple of months ago. It was about relatively young couple, I can't remember the age exactly, but again it showed them 10 years later, still together, married with good jobs and more children.

I think there was outrage at the time when they conceived too. I think its very well claiming that the media has played a huge part in the downfall of this young mans life and that, but ultimately it was him that made the choice not to see his son years later and at that point there was no input from the media.

The young boys mother however, seems not to have been a 'failure' as a mother even though she was involved in the same story and had more media intervention by the looks of it.

I sometimes think it is all to easy to blame something or someone else rather than an individual take responsibility for their own actions.

*off to look for the article*

 

[Lightworker]

^ Its not a question of blame.

I agree, ultimately, we should all hold ourselves accountable for our own choices in life. However, realistically speaking, people are affected to varying degrees by external factors, including the press and society.

It is widely accepted that how well one does (or doesn't do) can be determined by his environment and external support system. This is obviously not the case for everyone, and there are exceptions to the rule.

I don't want my posts to come off as solely blaming the press or whatever, it was just a thought that I had, and wanted voice because I think in such situations, I think people go to the other side of completely discounting the role of the press in how things turn out.

If he moved to another town where he was not recognized, I suppose in theory that should have mitigated the impact, but it does not negate any damage done prior to the move.

 

[JASMAK]

He could have been sexually abused too...and that could be why he was sexually active so young...just a thought