feeling happy and sad at the same time

[JASMAK]

Tonight I have been espesially happy about baby. It is my nine year anniversary today and I am just so happy to be finally (and successfully) pregnant. But, then, just now really, I thought, if I never miscarried the first baby, I would have a 2 year old, or the second, or the third I would have 8 month old twins. But, then I wouldn't have this baby. So, it is a very confusing and conflicting feeling. I am just so thankful for this baby, but sad that I had to lose the others to get here. I always try to look for hidden meanings in things, and maybe my losses were to prevent something terrible, I don't know. But, one thing I do know, is I will never forget them, and I really appreciate where I am and this baby.

 

[im_mi]

i know how you feel darling. Its okay to have those feelings, and being happy about your current pregnancy doesnt in any way take away from your losses, you know? its ok to be happy and to grieve at the same time.

Wishing you the very best

 

[Mrs Doddy]