feeling torn - baby prefers bottle

[Squiggy]

I can't tell if baby has a tongue or lip tie, I'll have to ask. But I have soft nipples and he's had trouble latching since day 1.

My breasts were suffering engorgement and pedi recommended pump, which is so much easier for baby (and for me!).

Problem is: I feel less connected to baby when bottle feeding.

I've been using the nipple shields successfully enough but baby fusses with those as well and it takes anywhere from 1-2 hours to get between 14-25 minutes of actual feeding into him.

The pump doesn't hurt as much, though it takes a long time. And baby eats much better via bottle, but I feel robbed of our bonding, like there's a loss of connection.

Any advice?

 

[Dream.dream]

Have you tried having a visit with a lactation consultant? They can help with latch and some can even check for a tongue tie .

 

[cat_reversing]

if bf is important to you, please persevere, it takes practice for you and lo.
Rule out any medical issues then keep trying, it may take a while but you'll get there in the end.
For baby, drinking from the bottle is easier, the milk come out at a steady rate right from the start whereas with your milk he has to suck to start the milk flowing and then if he isn't latched on properly he'll find it difficult to get the milk.
However, many many people struggle to start with, check this from kellymom website, https://kellymom.com/bf/concerns/mother/engorgement/
Good luck.